Absolution
by SAWild
Summary: Directly after Season 2- Leaving Mexico City. The Bristow family have always had a complicated relationship with each other. Jack and Sydney are CIA while their wife and mother are former KGB. Everything they thought they knew about 'Laura Bristow' aka Irina Derevko turned out to be a lie...or was it? One big puzzle of mystery and intrigue. As Irina says, "Truth Takes Time."
1. Chapter 1

**AN: This story is a long, beautiful, tragic, action packed, fun, hope filled adventure about LOVE in it's various forms. A crazy roller-coaster! I wrote this in college and people really enjoyed it. Hope for the same here! **

**For the ROE fandom coming over from those stories on NCIS, you may see some similar themes! I write from my life experiences, hence, they may make appearances here, there and everywhere. ENJOY! -Wild**

**For those new to my writing, I also write to music. This story has a soundtrack. I will post the names of the songs, and where they start in the story. If you don't have them, you can find them for free on Youtube or Spotify a lot of the times. I can't strongly encourage you enough to listen to these specific musical selections while you read! It adds so much to it, and I often use certain songs or themes for 'character' themes or moments in time. They are as much of the story as anything else in the telling. :)**

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**Music this chapter: (just keep it all on repeat until I tell you next song) ****_Stay or Leave by Dave Matthews, Nothing Compares by Sinead O'Connor, The Scientist by Coldplay._**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the ALIAS characters presented in this story.**

**_"Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny._" - C.S. Lewis.**

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ONE

o

(**Begins immediately after Season Two Finale when leaving Mexico City: Recap on 'The Plan')**

***Stay or Leave***

Jack sat silently staring out the window of the cargo plane that was carrying the team back to Los Angeles from Mexico City; his face expressionless; his mind in a fog. Moments from the last year were fleeting through his mind in rapid succession like an old 8mm film; moments that had brought him to the present and his current predicament. The pain his body was feeling from Sloane's torture was nothing in comparison to the pain he felt in his heart; though he would never admit to either.

"Dad…"Sydney spoke softly sliding into the seat next to him, taking hold of his hand, bringing him back to the real world. "Are you ok?" The look of concern for her father was evident on her face.

"Yes, Sweetheart." Jack gave her a small smile that reached his lips, but not his eyes, as he returned a gentle squeeze of her hand. "I'm fine." He stated, quickly adding, "Really," to Sydney's arched eyebrows of disbelief. "This is nothing." His reply threw his mind suddenly back in time just two short months ago when Irina had responded with the same answer as he finished removing the tracker from her shoulder.

"Dad," Sydney jolted his mind away from thoughts of Irina once again, "I know you've been through worse. I just…" She stammered, looking down at their entwined hands, unsure of how to approach the subject. "I just… you looked a little lost in thought and you've been so quiet since we left Mexico City… I just wanted to make sure you were 'ok?' You know, with everything that has happened in the last few days… months really." A quick fleeting smile passed Jack's lips as Sydney finally looked up at him. "I'm sorry I didn't get to you sooner, but we had no idea where to look until we captured Sark and he gave up the location where Sloane was keeping you-"

"Sark?" Jack gasped interrupting his daughter's nervous rambling, surprised by the mention of the man's name. "What do you mean you 'captured Sark?' Where and how did you know where to look?" His mind so lost in thought and swimming with whatever drug Sloane had used, he hadn't bothered to ask before how they managed to find him.

"Mom..." Sydney spoke softly and continued, as Jack's eyes grew wide. "She… she called me after we returned from Zurich telling me how, 'Sloane had double-crossed her, switching the crates.' She said that she had no idea where Sloane was keeping you but that Sark did and we could find him in Sweden. I didn't want to believe her lies again but it was the only lead we had."

The sadness washing over her face breaking Jack's heart at the thought of her mother causing her such anguish once again.

"She was right. He was there just like she said he would be." Flustered, Sydney removed her hand from her father's and began fidgeting with the hem of her jacket.

***Nothing Compares ***

"I just don't get her. She tells me the truth; then she lies; then the truth; then a lie… I just don't know what to believe anymore." Sydney sighed.

Jack listened silently, knowing his daughter needed to vent her frustrations, as he was feeling the same confusion over Irina Derevko.

"I've been telling myself since she betrayed us again that I didn't feel anything for her except hate…" Sydney's eyes started tearing.

Jack swallowed hard at the use of the word 'hate' when referring to her' own mother. He'd often felt it himself over the years when thinking of Irina but had never heard Sydney speak of her that way. He knew she loved her mother, no matter what she said. Her actions always spoke louder then words and he sensed that her intense need to capture Irina these past months, was an attempt to prove to herself, that she didn't love the woman who had hurt her so much… That Irina was the monster he'd led Sydney to believe she was.

"I've been lying to myself." Sydney broke the silence, saying out-loud what Jack was just thinking to himself. "All these months I've been trying to tell myself since she escaped and betrayed us, that I didn't feel anything but hate for her and that I wished she was dead… but when she was standing there tonight… on that ledge." Sydney shook her head still in disbelief at the memory of that moment.

Jack's interest sparked even more as he'd only heard the whispering between agents of Sydney and Irina's standoff on the roof.

"Telling me she realized she wasn't the one in the Prophecy, the one who was supposed to bring down Sloane, that it was me instead… wishing me luck," Sydney paused shaking her head in disbelief of the events of the night as her eyes began to tear. "And then, she smiled at me while I am threatening to shoot her again," Her voice raising an octave, "Telling me she loves me…and then she just… falls backward and is gone. It felt like a bomb had gone off in my chest and I couldn't breathe… She'd jumped. Of course she had a rope around her, but I didn't know that at the time…" Her anger and fears getting the best of her, the tears began to roll in a steady stream down her cheek, dripping from her chin. "All I could think of was… 'She was dead, just like I wished for,' but that wasn't what I wanted at all and I wanted to scream out and tell her not to jump, thinking I would never have the chance to say so much that I had never gotten to say…" Jack reached over and took hold of Sydney's hand as she continued, "But of course, nothing ever is, as it seems with Irina Derevko and by the time I realized what she'd done and that she really wasn't jumping to her death, and actually escaping once again…my feelings went straight back to anger… I, I… just don't know what I feel right now. All I know is that she infuriates me."

Jack used his free hand and gently wiped the stream of tears on her cheek. "She has that affect on people," He offered with a small smile and hint of sadness. "Sydney, I can't speak for your mother or even begin to explain to you, how her mind works or her motives in all this when I don't understand it myself… but I do believe… that for all her lies and deceit, she means it when she says she loves you... It may not be the most conventional way, but I do believe it's genuine. I know I said differently when she first turned herself into the CIA, but watching her with you… listening to her speak of you and with you, over the time period she was in our custody, Sydney… I think you already know this."

"I can't believe you're saying this! You're the one who's been telling me all along that I can't trust anything she says or does. Now you're telling me that I should believe she really does love me?" Sydney was fuming in the emotional confusion that everything was so complicated.

Jack knew what she was saying was true. He certainly wasn't the biggest supporter of Irina Derevko or her motives and yet, here he was defending her love for their daughter. Even he was baffled as to why.

"If that's true and not just another mind manipulation… then why does she continue to do these things to hurt me? She keeps saying that, 'truth takes time.' Well, I don't want to wait for it anymore! What possible truth can be out there to explain her actions over the last thirty years?" Sydney sighed, the anger rising inside her, "There is no truth, that's what I think! I think she just needs the time to fabricate another lie to pass off as an excuse for her behavior! What kind of mother uses her daughter's love, to manipulate her? She admitted that to me, that day in the ice rink! Before she knocked me out, of course. She said she 'knew all along that she would betray the CIA, but that she needed to gain my trust first.' Oh, and then the part of her love for you and me, not being a contrivance! Please, I can't believe I was so naive to 'want' to believe her."

"Sydney-" Jack began trying to calm his daughter and yet startled at this new revelation that Irina had said she not only loved Sydney, but him too. 'That...' Sydney had conveniently left out of her debriefing of the encounter with her mother.

"Dad," Sydney cut him off, "As far as I am concerned, there is no excuse in the world she could come up with to get her out of this… I am going to find her and justice will be served. And if she loves me like she claims too, then the only way she could redeem herself in my eyes, is to turn herself in again… This time for real, no hidden agendas!" She leaned forward, quickly placing a light kiss on Jack's cheek before leaving to sit next to Vaughn again.

The remainder of the trip was spent in silence as everyone onboard the plane contemplated the events of the evening and the significance they held. Sloane had escaped with the Rambaldi device, which was now complete, after double-crossing Derevko; in a baffling move, Derevko really was telling the truth about trying to double-cross Sloane and give them the Rambaldi device, only to be double-crossed by Sloane first. In her attempts to prove herself, Irina had given them Sark and saved Jack's life, only to elude capture once again after jumping from the roof of a forty-plus story building. The one thing that was somewhat clear was that Sloane and Derevko were no longer working together, or maybe this was what they wanted everyone to think… and the CIA had Sark to help them hunt Sloane and Derevko down.

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***The Scientist***

Meanwhile, over the Pacific, Irina too, was lost in thought as she gazed out the window staring into the blackened sea, lit only by the light of the full moon. She was a bit sore from the fall, and the deep cuts on her arms from pulling herself through the broken window would no doubt need stitching, but her real pain lie in the thought she would never again see Sydney… or Jack.

Irina had thought she was 'The One,' the one in The Prophecy; the one that would bring down Sloane, ultimately saving Sydney from this life of espionage; but she'd been wrong and it cost her... her one chance of redemption with her family, if you could call them that. And it also cost her, her freedom and any further immunity she might have been granted. If only she'd realized it sooner and hadn't gotten into that limo in Panama… If only she'd listened to her heart instead of her head. Listened to Irina, the mother and wife instead of Irina, 'The Man,' the mafia leader and her Rambaldi obsession. Irina closed her eyes thinking back to the events leading to this night.

Her plan had been flawless, or so she thought. She would turn herself into the CIA; steal the information she needed about Rambaldi from their servers and take down the Alliance all at once. She'd planned for everything except falling in love all over again with something she'd accepted was dead long ago...

After her extraction and subsequent imprisonment in Kashmir, Irina had learned to accept the fact that her life as her alias, 'Laura Bristow' was gone, dead, something she would never have again. In fact, her method of survival had been to use her pain as a tool of motivation, to convince herself that she was deluded to think she ever loved Jack Bristow, turning what love she felt for the man, into despise. It was her method of survival. It was easier to live without him if she hated him. She'd gotten so good at it, she never thought encountering Jack while in CIA custody would be difficult. She'd seen his briefing tapes after her 'death,' and his imprisonment for her deception… he had turned his love into hate as well.

Irina did, however, want to build some kind of trust with her child, Sydney; to establish some sort of relationship with her and maybe, just maybe, have time before she left, to explain herself to a daughter she realized would hate her for her betrayal to the United States, but even more for her betrayal of their family. Everything about her plan was working exactly like she'd planned for with the exception of Jack.

Irina had planned on him distrusting her, believing she was planning something, she'd counted on his distrust and playing him against their daughter if need be but she hadn't counted on the level of hate which he felt for her. He'd set her up and tried to have her executed; he almost succeeded… but he didn't and her plan was back on track.

The almost execution was the first unplanned moment, the second was Irina's return trip to Kashmir, the last place on Earth she ever wanted to return to. But to gain Sydney's trust, to save her daughter from possible capture by the monster Cuvee… she had to go.

In the beginning of the trip, Irina actually found it amusing to goad Jack into fighting with her; he was such an easy target and seeing him so frustrated let her know that even though it was hate, he still felt something for her… and something was better then nothing. After all these years apart, she could still get to him, proving her power over him. But then their lives were put in danger on more then one occasion, and they had to work together to save themselves and their daughter.

Then, on the train, seeing Jack with that bottle, remembering the toaster incident... All the memories Irina had tried so desperately to hide away, came flooding forward and she started to remember the reasons why, maybe she didn't despise Jack as much as she thought… or he her. They had both dropped their guards down for a moment and smiled, even laughed about happier times when they were married… if only for a moment before realization had set in that those happier times were under false pretenses. Irina had never thought twice about saving Jack's life in the landmine field, the thought of not saving him had never entered her mind.

Once inside the prison, Irina masked her nervousness about being back in the place she'd desperately tried to escape from, by jumping into action telling Jack and Sydney where everything was and what the plan had to be. Telling them that their assumptions that she'd been an officer were incorrect and instead...a prisoner... was out of the question until Jack insisted she not leave his side. She almost… almost, lost her composure in telling them why she knew the sewage tunnels and mine locations, but kept herself in-check not wanting to 'go there' and relive the moment or show any signs of weakness to them. She forged ahead only to be caught by the man she despised so much, Cuvee.

Again, Irina had a role to play and this time… she had only hoped she could save Jack and Sydney once again from the man who haunted her dreams. She couldn't bear to see Sydney after spotting the tears welling in her daughter's eyes after her apparent betrayal, so she had to get through to Jack. Desperately trying to convey the message to him with her eyes 'that she wasn't betraying him again'… at least not yet. She'd offered he and Sydney a chance to escape, knowing Jack would take it… but what she hadn't counted on was his refusal to leave without her. She had resigned herself to believe that she would be forced to stay, play out her part with Cuvee long enough to get the Rambaldi device and then escape from him, from there once again. That was the turning point, Jack's refusal to leave without her.

The overwhelming love Irina had begun to feel again for her daughter, at being near her again…seeing the beautiful, strong, intelligent woman she had grown up to be, became almost unbearable and she'd started to spend her moments alone in her glass cage pondering her life and the road that could ever have taken her away from her daughter. The moment on the roof, Irina hadn't meant to break down like she did but the emotion of it all was too much. She had longed for so much of her life to be near her daughter, to have that connection again with Sydney, to feel her touch. In that moment she wasn't thinking about her master plan, only that she couldn't let Sydney leave without holding her in her arms. Sydney had returned her embrace, needing as badly as she did, the physical connection with her mother. The sound of the guards screaming at them and the bullets sliding into the chambers of the guns trained on her; brought her back to reality. Irina was a terrorist in their eyes and a threat to her daughter.

Jack had approached her about giving up her real agenda in exchange for a comfortable 'prison' with certain freedoms. An offer Irina toyed with, seriously contemplating taking him up on, but ultimately deciding that she should 'stick with the plan, move forward.'

Over the next couple of months her relationship with both Sydney and Jack had improved greatly, far beyond what she had originally expected and the thought of leaving them again brought sadness to her heart, only for a moment, before pushing the thoughts out of her mind, as she too, was an expert in compartmentalizing her feelings. 'She was here for a purpose;' Irina had to remind herself.

Jack had been full of surprises but none more then asking her for help in solving the Ariana Kane mystery. Irina had been honest with him and once again, saved his life when she could have easily refused to help.

Her closeness with Sydney was becoming dangerous to her plan. Irina had wanted to get close to her daughter, but not betray her in her final betrayal of the CIA. She hadn't counted on Sydney's need to interact with her mother or her own need to interact with Sydney. With SD-6 and the Alliance gone, Irina had successfully completed a main part of her mission in turning herself into the CIA, and the time was drawing near for her departure. She expected Sydney to leave the CIA with SD-6 and the Alliance gone, just as she said she would, but when Sydney came to her… telling her she was thinking about staying with the CIA, just so she could see her, it was too much for Irina. She didn't want to be responsible for keeping Sydney in the CIA when the main part of her plan was to get her out. Out, before Irina betrayed them, so she wouldn't be betraying her daughter. Irina tried to be distant with her, telling her not to make more of their relationship then what it really was and it pained her to see Sydney's hurt expression, but she had to. Sydney was stubborn and somehow, the CIA convinced her daughter to stay… against Irina's protest of refusing to see her if she did stay.

Irina had been upset and confused by Jack's involvement in it all. She had thought that Jack had wanted Sydney out of this life of lies, death and deceit just as much as she did; yet he did nothing to convince Sydney to leave. With Sydney staying in the CIA, the plans began to change… not so much in the tactical sense but in the emotional and reasonable sense.

The plan had been for Sydney to be out of the CIA before Irina escaped, as not to betray Sydney and to give Sydney her chance at a normal life. Irina would have the Rambaldi information and Sydney would have her freedom, but with Sydney's refusal to leave until Sloane was captured or killed; Irina's plan had begun to shift. She needed not only to use Arvin Sloane to get the Rambaldi pieces for herself but then take him out so Sydney could have her life back. She had found away to convince Jack that by working together to bring down Sloane, they could free Sydney and give her a normal life.

She'd be lying if she said she didn't enjoy her trip to Bangkok with Jack. Irina enjoyed Jack's reaction to her appearance when she first stepped out of the bathroom in the plane wearing the little leopard print dress. Jack said nothing but his wondering eyes, the hitch in his breath and the massive lump he attempted to swallow in his throat when she breezed by him to get her purse, told her that he still found her attractive, and she could still take his breath away. It felt good to be out and in action again after so many months in a tiny cell, though, she could have done without the part where she nearly had her head blown off if it not for Jack watching her back... something she really never would have expected. But then again, maybe she should have… Somewhere inside the cold man that Jack Bristow was now, was the same loving, adoring husband she once knew… He'd just buried that 'loving Jack' down deep, as she had done, to escape the feelings of betrayal and pain that 'loving so much' had caused.

On the flight to Hong Kong, Irina's emotions were threatening to get the best of her after Jack saved her life. Especially when he had every reason in the world to let her die, she wanted to thank him but somehow it didn't seem appropriate when there was so much more that needed to be said. Irina quickly jumped to a subject that she could retain more control over her emotions, and so she jumped to Arvin Sloane and his friendship with Jack and the obsession of Rambaldi. Jack had seen her tactical maneuver in trying to switch topics; that her emotions 'were' getting the best of her as tears welled in her eyes and she looked away. He found a way to bring the subject back to 'them' with his 'mutual devotion to our wives,' statement, reminding Irina of how much he really had loved his wife and how much she had cost him.

For the first time in a long time Irina allowed herself a moment to think about how hard it must have been on Jack to lose the love they shared. She'd only thought about herself and now she was seeing that she wasn't the only one affected deeply but her departure as 'Laura.' Feeling the same sudden urge for immediate physical contact that she had with Sydney on the roof that day, Irina grabbed Jack's hand as he passed her by. He didn't rip his hand away as she had feared he would, but instead let her hold on to it, caress it with her thumb as she used to when they were married and needed to feel close to him when she was upset. The contact had sent a bolt of electricity through her and she was sure, he felt it too. Irina was able to thank him for raising their daughter and instead of some snide remark about 'not being there and leaving them' like he had given her before their return from Kashmir, he simply let it go and told Irina to get some sleep. Maybe because he didn't feel right about taking the credit for raising Sydney to be the wonderful woman she turned out to be; he wasn't exactly there for her either. Sydney raised herself under the guidance of a nanny if they were talking truths. Something Irina thought about long after Jack had left her alone on the plane. She really began questioning betraying them again, but all thoughts of redemption were shoved violently back into their little compartment when she had laid eyes on the Rambaldi Manuscript. The electricity she felt as she picked it up was almost as strong as her earlier contact with Jack and it was Jack, that brought her back to the real world reminding her where she was and what they were doing.

When she and Jack returned to Los Angeles, Irina's goodbye with Sydney had almost been her undoing. Irina had spent the entire trip back from Hong Kong and the days and nights that followed, thinking about what she was going to say to her daughter in their final goodbye. She knew Sydney would be hurt and outraged with her when it was all over with and she wanted to make it as painless as possible for her, yet at the same time, conveying to her that she really did love her.

Irina did her best to elude Sydney's questions so that she didn't have to directly lie to her, just omitted the truth in certain areas. She meant what she said, 'it was going to be dangerous, she might be killed setting this trap…' and that she really did hope, someday, she would get the chance to comeback… to be in her life again. Placing her hand on the glass and having Sydney return the gesture with a mirror of her own hand, the last time so small it only covered her palm, now an exact match… moved Irina more then she could take and had to remove it quickly, fearing she would burst into tears at the thought of leaving her daughter again.

That night in the hotel room in Panama with Jack, Irina seriously began questioning her plan and couldn't stop the fidgeting that was overtaking her body. She tried to listen to what Jack was saying about the mission, though her mind was all over the place and mostly concerned with how to approach him about removing the tracker in her shoulder and not having him see through her. Irina's reasoning seemed logical to him and Jack agreed to remove it. She had gained his trust enough for him to go against CIA protocol and remove the tracker.

Irina sat silently on the bed as Jack removed the device from her shoulder with her mind all over the place in those moments. The sigh that escaped her was not out of pain, she hadn't lied to Jack about that… Irina really had been through worse; but more out of the loss of physical contact with his skin on hers'. Irina smiled, genuinely touched at his concern that he'd hurt her. Their eyes locked and she could barely remember what she was saying, as she watched Jack's eyes drift down to her lips, she could barely breathe and leaned in just as his lips captured hers. It was fierce, tense at first, but then she felt him melting into her as he lost himself in their kiss. She could feel Jack's hands in her hair and she reached up pulling him into her as well. Lying back onto the bed they began to fall into an all-to-familiar dance, with heat searing through their bodies at the immediate need for contact that had been absent for too long.

The shirt, that was already halfway off Irina's body, was discarded with one quick movement of Jack's hand, breaking their contact long enough to pull it over her head… long enough for Jack to stop and look at her intensely as he noticed the tears in her eyes.

"Jack…" Irina began in a soft, unsteady voice. Afraid of the repercussions of allowing herself to just let go, if only for one night. Jack sensed what she was thinking and immediately closed the distance between them, pinning her body to the bed with the weight of his own in a desperate attempt to keep her there; leaning down to silence her with a soft finger to her lips.

"Shhh" He responded in a soft whisper, sweeping the hair behind her ear as she had done so many times and passed onto their' daughter.

Jack had looked deeply into her eyes for a moment, seemingly searching for something, and then closed the rest of the distance meeting her mouth with his. There would be no talk tonight, no words at least… everything that needed to be said was spoken in body language and contact with each other that each had so desperately craved and yet denied existed.

The reunion lasted well into the early morning where exhaustion finally took over and they collapsed into each other, trying to at least get some rest before the mission. Irina hadn't slept long and woke to find herself on her side, staring directly at the face of one the men who haunted her dreams for the last 20 years. This wasn't a dream; this wasn't something her imagination had conjured up only to disappear in the morning. Jack was real and sleeping peacefully right beside her. Their legs entwined as they face one another and Jack's hand, still lazily draped over her hips as he had done so many times in the past. Tears began to roll down Irina's cheeks and over her nose onto the pillow as she thought about leaving him again and breaking his trust once more. She didn't know if she could deprive herself of him any more, she had pushed her feelings for him away for so long, now that they were out… she wasn't sure she could 'compartmentalize' them again. Irina wished the morning had never come and wanted nothing more then for time to stand still, if only for a moment longer. She sighed and leaned her head closer into Jack's, closing her eyes to fall asleep and wait.

Morning finally came and when Irina woke Jack was already awake staring intently at her. A small smile came to his lips; one she hadn't seen in years. She returned the smile and then closed her eyes again, wishing this day away.

Jack had taken the opportunity to lean in and kiss her softly, once more bringing her eyes open again as the contact was broken. "We should get going." He stated in almost a whisper.

Irina's only acknowledgement was a slight nod before she rolled over to get out of the bed. Suddenly shy and feeling vulnerable, she wrapped the sheet around her body and headed for the bathroom, looking anywhere but at Jack the entire way there hoping he wouldn't see the tears she was desperately trying to hold in. She was successful. She had made it into the bathroom and turned the shower on, the water cascading over her face and washing the tears away as fast as they were falling. When she'd finally gotten herself under control, had washed and shut the shower off, ready to be "The Man" again, she wrapped herself in the white plush towel when she heard the knock on the door.

"Can I come in?" Jack asked softly. "I need to brush my teeth."

Irina wanted to laugh at Jack's nervous tone about asking to enter the bathroom and feeling the need to explain his need to brush his teeth. Irina said nothing, just opened the door and smiled letting him in. He grabbed his toothbrush and watched in fascination while she finished combing her hair. She looked up in the mirror just as she finished and caught Jack staring at her. His movements were as slow as her own and she knew he was dawdling, wasting time just like she was, trying to savor every minute in this strange time-warp and echoes of the past before they had to leave. Irina found her own toothbrush and put on the paste and then held it suspended in mid-air waiting for Jack to catch on. They always used to brush their teeth together in the morning and 'Laura' had always put the toothpaste on his brush for him.

After a moment's hesitation, Jack brought his toothbrush up so she could put the paste on for him. She could feel his eyes watching her every movement as if he were analyzing her, at the time she thought maybe that was her paranoia talking but she realized now, looking back, that he didn't trust her completely as was evident by him injecting her with the passive tracker.

When she finished, Irina once again looked up and caught his eyes with hers in the mirror…staring back for a moment into them before she quickly turned and kissed him passionately only stopping at the pressing need for air. Resting her forehead against his, calming their breath as each knew they didn't have time for more… and relishing in the intimate contact. It would have been so easy to drop the towel and let Jack take her away from this all again, but she couldn't… 'Stick to the plan', she had to remind herself. Reluctantly, and then urgently, she broke the contact with Jack and left the bathroom so he could finish getting cleaned up and she could put on some clothes.

Irina hadn't a single word all morning, afraid of what to say… what not to say, afraid her emotions would get the best of her and ruin her plan. Jack, for the most part, had been silent as well. When both were ready to leave they headed for the lobby where they were meeting the agents who would be escorting them.

Just before reaching the door, Jack reached down and took hold of Irina's hand, as if knowing she was upset and needed the contact. He turned the handle and Irina pushed it shut to his surprise, and swiftly stood between him and the door staring intently into his dark brown eyes, willing him to see her love for him. Jack brought his hand up to brush her cheek with his fingers and then casually brushed her hair behind her ear once more before offering a small smile. Irina willed her emotions to keep her tears at bay and closed her eyes, leaned in and kissed Jack for the last time… softly, and tenderly, wanting to memorize it in everyway.

The ride to the meeting place had been absolutely silent and Irina was sure the guards knew something was going on between them as she and Jack said nothing, sitting across from one another in the van, but staring intently at the each other.

As she exited the van, Irina turned back once more willing Jack to see her. Her. Irina. And the love 'she' had for him, and almost asking for forgiveness for what she was about to do…again. Jack nodded, as if to say, 'Don't worry. It's going to be ok. This will work.' And then the door slammed shut, almost symbolically.

As Sloane's limo approached, Irina's mind raced with her options. She could give up her plan, and go along with the one she fabricated with Jack. She wouldn't lose him, or Sydney and she would have her redemption, and Sydney would be free of Sloane… on the other hand, she had worked so long and so hard for the Rambaldi Prophecy and she could still free Sydney of Sloane even if she lost her trust once again.

Back and forth, her mind raced. Julian had gotten out of the car and went to open the door. Irina had decided to give up her plan and go with Jack on this. But then the door opened and Sloane wasn't there. He changed the plan. Irina immediately felt out of place, what was she to do now? 'Go? Stay? Go? Stay?' She'd never been so indecisive in her life. Well, maybe once before when faced with the same situation… leaving her life with Jack and Sydney. 'Well, ok then. No Sloane then I am not going.' She thought.

Julian was noticeably angry with her over indecision and confused as to why Irina wasn't going along with the plan. Frustrated he began to leave and she saw the chance of getting Sloane going out the window and she had to think fast. She asked to take the guards, in a move that surprised Julian and even herself. Irina thought it would buy her time and give some protection if Jack caught on too slowly as to what was happening and she was in need of some protection from Sloane's men. Nervously, she looked towards the sky... still unsure about what she was about to do hoping Jack could see her on the satellite and figure out what she had been planning, and stop all this without exposing herself. And yet, she was saying 'goodbye' in case he didn't figure it out. Irina could see Julian looking at her in the rearview mirror and she could feel his eyes burning holes into her head as he was confused by her actions. Thankfully, he didn't know how confused she was about them. She could hear the helicopter above; 'Finally Jack has caught on to what was happening and is sending in the Delta Force to stop it Sloane…herself, from getting away.'

It seemed like forever and the chase was on, but 'we' had thought of everything and the double car switch worked; Julian lost the Delta helicopter. Irina was surprised at how quickly he reached over the seat and shot the men next to her, obviously upset with her as he ordered her out of the car, the first time ordering her around in his life. Nervously, she'd exited and this time, the real Arvin Sloane appeared. The choice had been made; Irina willed herself to try to act happy about it… it was her idea after all. She handed over the manuscript pages to the 'devil' and ultimately her last chance at redemption. "Thank you for extracting me." She gave Sloane a slight smile; 'God,' how she hated those words, the last time she used them was more then 20 years ago and was under almost the same precedent… Thanking a man she despised for extracting her from a situation she never wanted to leave and having to act happy about it.

Irina shook her head softly at the memories and relaxed back against the soft plush suede of her plane seat, closing her eyes at the memories and wiped the single tear rolling down her cheek. 'If only…' she sighed. 'No,' she admonished herself, shaking her head; she wasn't going to play the 'what if' game. She'd realized long ago that it caused more pain and, 'you can't change the past, only move forward.'

Maybe one day, Sydney would forgive her or at the very least understand her motives… but that day was yet to come, the truth would take time. Her daughter was just as stubborn as she was, something Sydney proved many times in the months that followed her mother's escape from CIA custody. Irina had to smile at the persistence Sydney had in pursuing her.

Their first encounter after Irina's escape had almost ended in disaster. Upon realizing Jack had been tracking her, she knew Sydney wouldn't be far behind and seeing her and Vaughn in the lobby of the building Julian was about to blow up… startled her even though she was expecting Sydney to be there. In a moment's panic, she'd called out to Sydney, knowing her child would chase her out of the building and survive the explosion. Their second meeting hadn't ended well either; she and Sydney had come face to face in a standoff in that tunnel ultimately ending with Sydney shooting her… in the arm, giving Irina time to escape just as she had done for Sydney in Taipei.

Irina unconsciously began to rub her arm where the bullet had pierced her flesh from that exchange. All that remained of the physical pain caused that day was a jagged pink scar, like so many others that marked her body. The emotional pain of that day would last long after the physical wounds healed. Sydney had been forced to shoot her own mother and also lost someone she loved and had thought died, all over again in Emily Sloane. Irina had seen the sadness and pain in Sydney's eyes and only hoped that her message of 'Truth Takes Time' would be enough for her daughter not to give up completely on her.

In the weeks that followed, Irina had gone through the motions, conducting business as usual but without the same passion as she had before. Her thoughts once, only of her Rambaldi quest now replaced by thoughts of her daughter and Jack. Rambaldi was beginning to have less and less of a hold over her now that she'd had contact with her long lost family.

The real low point had come when Irina had let Julian talk her into blackmailing Sydney for the keycard to the NSA facility in exchange for proof that would clear Will Tippin. Sydney had been right in telling her to 'go to hell.' After all, 'What kind of a mother shoots, electrocutes, and blackmails her own daughter?' She had reached rock bottom before, or so she thought, but nothing was worth the pain she'd caused Sydney. Irina knew there was very little chance that Sydney would ever forgive her for her actions, but at the very least… Irina could give Sydney, Sloane and the Rambaldi pieces she'd spent the last two decades searching for.

Watching Sydney skate with Agent Vaughn that day on the ice brought back a lot of memories of her own youth, in another time, another place… a generation apart. Something else Sydney had yet to learn the truth about… Of course, Sydney didn't believe her when she said all she wanted in return for helping Will was for Sydney to raid Sloane's warehouse. Irina confessed her plan and how she had carried it out, and tried to stress that the love she felt for Sydney and for her father were not part of her manipulation. She couldn't blame her daughter for not trusting anything she'd said. But Irina truly had, been sorry for everything she'd done and all she wanted to do now, was help Sydney. Sloane, however, didn't trust Irina either and double-crossed her by moving the crates containing the Rambaldi pieces and simultaneously kidnapping Jack and the Di Regno Heart, making it look as though Irina had once again manipulated them into getting what she wanted. Sydney was furious with her on the phone when she called trying to help and explain; Irina knew Sydney would be. But she was just as desperate to find Jack as Sydney was and giving up Julian was the only way to do so.

Irina's contact inside the CIA had told them that Julian had revealed Sloane had taken Jack to Mexico City. She had to be there, in Mexico, to make sure Jack was rescued and Sydney was safe from Sloane. The look on Sydney's face was absolute confusion when she realized it had been Irina who helped she and Vaughn escape the firestorm of bullets in the hallway by shooting Sloane's men. Irina told her to 'go after Sloane' but of course, her daughter didn't listen and instead pursued her up onto the roof of the skyscraper.

She'd wanted to slip away into the darkness but her daughter had cornered her on the ledge. She couldn't allow Sydney to take her back into custody but she also couldn't leave her again without some sort of an explanation for everything that had happened. It was up to Sydney now, to realize The Prophecy.

Irina felt the gradual change in air pressure and realized they were descending and it jarred her out of her previous thoughts. She was going home; well to one of them anyway, to slow down and rest for the first time in years without an agenda or prophecy to chase.

The pilot, waiting to greet her before she departed, seemed to be reading her mind and Irina had to admire the irony, "Welcome to Sydney, Ma'am… Enjoy your stay."


	2. Chapter 2

****The following takes place immediately after we see Sydney slide down the wall after her battle with Allison in the episode, 'The Telling.'**

**Music for this Chapter (on repeat) : **_**Che Valiers De Sangreal and Malleus Mareficarum**_** by Hans Zimmer from****_ The Da Vinci Code Soundtrack, O Fortuna _****by Carl Orff**

* * *

TWO

o

Jack felt his blood run cold when he got the call. Sydney was missing and possibly dead. Vaughn had gone back to the house after they landed from Mexico City, as promised to pick up Sydney for their weekend in Santa Barbara but the scene he found was horrific. Blood sprays and spatters on the walls in Sydney's bedroom, everything in the house had been broken or turned over from some heavy fighting and Will was bleeding to death lying in the bathtub. Francie and Sydney were nowhere to be found.

Vaughn immediately called the ambulance and the CIA, who rushed to the scene. DNA samples were taken from the blood smear on the wall in Sydney's bedroom and the rapid genetics test performed confirmed it was indeed Sydney's blood. Jack had arrived on the scene 10 minutes after he received the phone call from Vaughn and his heart sank at the news. Sloane. Sloane was responsible for this, Jack was sure.

Jack would stop at nothing to find out what had happened to his daughter. Will finally re-gained consciousness after three days and confirmed what they had already suspected, that 'Francie' was actually Allison Doran, the other Helix-double.

Weeks had now gone by, and no new leads on Sloane's whereabouts could be found. The trail had gone cold on both he and Irina Derevko. Jack wondered if Irina knew what happened to their daughter, or perhaps was even involved in her disappearance. All plausible explanations for Irina's motives in doing so made no sense though.

He had to find Irina; she was the only one who could help them now with her massive network and inside knowledge. The last few weeks had taken their toll on Jack. He wasn't eating, barely sleeping and working endlessly to find his daughter… and Irina. He sat at his desk going over everything he had on the case, again, looking for something he might have missed when he saw Marshall running towards him out of breath and stumbling to find his words. "Slow down, Marshall…" Jack was growing impatient and yet empathetic for the young man who was obviously in distress and had been since Sydney had disappeared.

"Sir… Agent Bristow… we've just received an email on a secure server concerning your daughter!" Marshall rambled out; sweat beads forming on his brow.

"Who's sending them, Marshall?" Jack asked already having an idea what the answer was.

"Your wife, I mean your ex-wife… Irina Derevko, sir." Marshall finally got out, unsure what to call this woman who baffled everyone in the office. "Here," he said handing Jack a half crumbled piece of paper, the ink smeared for Marshall's sweaty hands. The paper simple read, 'The Covenant… new organization dedicated to Rambaldi, run by a man called 'Lazarey,' with the help of Cuvee and Sloane.'

"Cuvee." Jack hissed his name remembering the encounter with the man in Kashmir.

Kendall heard the commotion and joined the group forming around Jack. "You received new Intel?" He demanded, "What's it say?" Taking the paper from Jack's hand and glancing over it quickly. "Well this can't be good. Who's this Intel from?" He asked looking around the small group gathering waiting for an answer, and finally zeroing in on Jack.

"Derevko." Jack replied evenly knowing Kendall's thoughts of the woman.

"Great! Just great. The only piece of Intel we get in two weeks comes from a manipulative Russian terrorist we know we can't trust, claiming that two of her former business partners, both as obsessed with Rambaldi as she is, are now involved in a new organization with this Lazarey man. How and the hell can we believe any of this?" Kendall threw his hand with the paper into the air.

Vaughn, ecstatic with any new leads on Sydney, didn't want to dismiss Irina's Intel as easily as Kendall had. "Sir, I know that Derevko has proved time and again she is not to be trusted but even if this is another one of her manipulations, her Intel has been good in the past, even if it later serves her own purposes..." He thought back to the Rabat mission and all the other times Irina had offered up information that later helped her in some way, "It still deserves our full attention on the off chance it might actually be accurate."

Kendall knew he had a point and agreed, "All right, go ahead… use all our resources."

Vaughn could hardly contain his smile as Kendall stormed off upset they were once again relying on Intel from Irina Derevko. Jack wasn't exactly thrilled about it either but her Intel in the past had been correct, even if it served Irina's own purpose he had to believe where Sydney was concerned Irina's purpose would be the same as theirs… to find her safely and quickly.

"I've got something!" Vaughn practically shouted from his desk where he'd been working feverishly on his computer trying to find out anything from Irina's Intel for the past 16 hours. "You aren't going to believe this," he said as Jack, Weiss, and Kendall surrounded his desk. "I've been looking on the Echelon System for anything on the Covenant, Cuvee, Sloane and this guy named Lazarey. Lazarey had a hit on the system." All eyes now narrowing in concentrating intently on what Vaughn was saying. "Pytor Alexei Lazarey, Russian businessman, with substantial funds from his seemingly legitimate business dealings in Russia and throughout Europe mostly dealing with charitable organizations and relief programs… it seems he is quite the philanthropist."

"We know who is probably bank rolling this new organization then," Kendall paused, "But why would a Russian philanthropist who donates money to needy causes be working with Cuvee and Sloane on a new organization devoted to Rambaldi?" Something about this didn't add up.

"Well, there's more," Vaughn began again, "Lazarey is a descendent of the Romanov family. His grandfather was the Tsar Nicholas II's brother Misha, whom Nicholas tried to abdicate the thrown to during the rebellion but Misha refused; and it seems that is where a great deal of the money from his charitable projects comes from, as the Romanov's were 'extremely' wealthy for Royalty. We've been working on trying to figure it out but there is some connection between the Romanov family and Rambaldi, I suppose his involvement has something to do with that."

"So what we know so far is that Sloane is working with two Russians on something that has something to do with Rambaldi, who has hidden things in Russia before… I'm really starting to hate that name…" Kendall huffed, shifting his weight on his hips, "and this information came from another Russian, Irina Derevko. Someone care to wager a bet that this new organization is located in Russia?"

"We can't be sure of that," Vaughn quickly added, his tone a little alarming, "Just because it involves Russians working on the Rambaldi Prophecy doesn't necessarily mean its located in Russia… look at Derevko's organization… she's Russian and it's global."

"Thank you, Agent Vaughn, for informing us again that Irina Derevko is Russian and that her organization is global. I'd forgotten." Kendall spat back at Vaughn with dripping sarcasm.

"Look, this is getting us nowhere, I believe-" Jack began but was cut off when Marshall came running over flustered as usual.

"We received another one… another email I mean, from her… from your wife, I mean ex-wife… I mean-"

"What is it, Marshall?" Jack quickly interrupted the young man's ramblings about what to call Irina in his presence.

"It's an address… of a warehouse… in Moscow."

"See!" Kendall grabbed the paper from Marshall. "Russia!" He smiled with a smug look before getting down to business. "This could be a trap. Derevko has set us up before and she may be in on all this. Either way, you know she will be there." He stare directly at Jack waiting for his rebuttal he knew was coming.

"Yes." Jack replied calmly knowing it was the truth. "But whether it is a trap or isn't, whether Irina is involved or isn't, makes no difference. If there is a chance that Sydney is there, I am going."

"Me too." Added Vaughn.

"Me too," Weiss stood from where he was sitting on the edge of the desk.

"Count me in." Came from Dixon.

"Me too." Marshall added in all seriousness, straightening his posture to seem more 'sure of himself.'

"What is this? The Volunteer Fire Brigade? Need I remind you that the final decision is mine?You don't get to chose what missions are acceptable and who goes! And you…" He said whipping his head around to Marshall, "you aren't even Field Rated."

"I've gone with Syd… I mean Agent Bristow before… and I could offer any technical assistance in case it is needed." Marshall pleaded his case to Kendall hoping to help in recovering Sydney. "She risked her life to save me, I want to return the favor."

Everyone remained silent as Kendall pondered letting them, go or not. Finally he sighed, throwing his hands up into the air. "Fine. Jack, this is your responsibility. This may be our only chance to ever have three wanted terrorists in the same place. I don't need to remind you all… that there are standing 'Shoot To Kill' orders on Derevko and Sloane if given the chance." He paused letting the information sink in. "Don't let this be another disaster, Jack." He added thinking about Panama before storming off in the other direction.

"Just one question," Weiss turned to Vaughn with a mischievous gleam in his eye, "The Romanov fortune, what are we talking about here… I mean roughly, how wealthy is wealthy if your Royal?"

Vaughn looked at Jack who was obviously annoyed by the question but was curious as well and nodded for Vaughn to proceed. "The estimated worth of the family's possessions, meaning money, property, jewels, etc. would be roughly, and this is just roughly… about $165 billion dollars." Vaughn choked out as the rest of the group's mouths dropped to the floor.

"You're jokin' right?" Weiss hit him in the arm, "I mean, no one has that much money except maybe Bill Gates, Oprah or the Sultan of Brunei or some small country... but I don't think they even have that much money."

"I'm not kidding." Vaughn deadpanned right back at him sobering the group where upon Jack immediately jumped into action devising a plan, they were leaving for Russia tonight.

* * *

-Moscow, Russia-

Dressed from head-to-toe in black, Irina finished loading the last magazine clip with ammunition and slammed it into her gun letting it drop into its holster around her thigh. She'd learned from the Intel she received about the night Sydney disappeared, that her daughter had been injured and there was no way Irina could get an 'injured Sydney' and herself out of the warehouse. She was also a 'Wanted' woman and couldn't take the chance that Sydney wasn't as badly wounded as she'd thought, and would try to capture her mother again in another horrible face-off once Irina freed her from the Covenant.

Irina had planned to distract Sloane, Cuvee, and Lazarey long enough for the CIA team to get there and save Sydney and give her time to escape. It was a dangerous plan, but the only one she could think of to save her daughter from the unspeakable things she'd experienced at the hands of Cuvee, and never wanted Sydney to go through.

On the roof of the warehouse, Irina finished securing her rope and took a moment to take a deep breath and one last look at spectacular sight of Moscow's city lights. The breeze was cool even though it was summer, but not cold, and she welcomed the cool relief as the rush of adrenaline surging through her had her blood boiling. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and once again stepped off the ledge into darkness.

Sydney was just starting to come to when she heard voices, some she hadn't recognized and others she knew, but couldn't place in her yet drugged state.

"Sydney, Darling… time to wake-up."

'Sloane. Where was she? What was wrong with her? Why was Sloane there?' So many questions and yet Sydney couldn't force her mouth to speak. She knew she'd been drugged and tried to focus her energy on her surroundings as her training had taught her.

There was another man in the room, he seemed familiar too but she couldn't quite make out his face as her vision was blurry from whatever she'd been drugged with. She closed her eyes once again; too tired to keep them open, when she felt the sting of a slap on her face.

"Stay awake!" Someone ordered, presumably the one who had just slapped her though she still couldn't focus fully.

"Was that entirely necessary?"

Sydney heard Sloane's voice again but couldn't move her head to the direction it was coming from. Any answer the man might have given was cut off by the sound of the door slamming open as another man entered the room. Sydney tried to concentrate but felt herself sliding sideways as she had no control over her body from whatever drug they had used. She'd been sitting in a chair and was saved from hitting the floor by someone pulling sharply on her arm, sitting her upright again. She felt her arms being lifted and placed on a table she just now realized was in front of her, helping her regain some sense of balance and stability.

"Any word?" Sydney heard Sloane asking the man who'd just entered the room. He was a tall thin man with blonde hair, and was wearing a black suit… that much Sydney could make out as the man came closer. She was trying harder to concentrate but finding it very difficult with a pounding headache.

"Not yet, but I suspect she'll be here any time now. Is she," he said gesturing towards Sydney with a hint of Russian accent, "coming around yet?"

"Yes, we've given her a mild sedative to counteract the other drug, bringing her to consciousness, yet keeping her immobile for the time being." Sloane replied.

"Good," The blonde man said leaning over the table looking intently at Sydney. "We wouldn't want to have to fight with both of you." He smiled.

"I'm going to go check with the guards, make sure everything is in place." Came a hiss of a voice again from the man that slapped her, yet Sydney recognized but couldn't place even as the man in the gray suit breezed by her and out the door.

"He's so antsy." The man in the black suit muttered to Sloane, when the other man had left, from where he was now standing behind Sydney.

"It's the anticipation of Irina. She always gets him excited." Sloane replied.

'Oh, God!' Sydney cringed internally. She should have known that her mother had lied again in Mexico City and was still working with Sloane.

Just then, the sound of shattering glass jolted her attention back to her surroundings and watched in awe as a flying-ball of black came bursting through the plate glass windows to her right, rolling across the floor in front of them and stood, with gun pointed right in her direction. Sydney could barely breathe staring at the figure in front of her.

"Irina." Sloane hissed through a smile. "How nice of you to drop in."

"Hello Cousin," the man in the black suit spoke in Russian, causing Irina's eyes to quickly glance in his direction while keeping her gun aimed directly in front of her.

'Cousin?' Sydney wondered but was still too drugged to say anything or move though her vision was becoming more clear and focused staring at her mother before her.

"We've been expecting you." The man in the black suit finished while Sydney took notice of the slight movement of her mother's eyebrow in surprise.

"Pytor." Irina hissed back in Russian, "I never would have thought you'd be in on this, knowing the repercussions it would have."

'Pytor? Who's Pytor?' Sydney questioned herself trying to remember if she'd heard of, or seen this man before. She was getting more confused as time went on. She had thought her mother was part of this operation in kidnapping her and the gun Irina seemingly had trained on her would suggest that, but now Sydney wasn't sure with her mother talking about repercussions this man faced for his involvement or why she would burst through the windows instead of using the door?

"You brought this on yourself, Irina, breaking the family code first… you gave the CIA Julian." The man in the black suit spat at Irina.

Sydney was trying desperately to process this new information. The man in the black suit had called her mother 'cousin' and was now talking about breaking 'family codes' and 'who was Julian?' The drug-induced fog in Sydney's brain was slowing her attempts to think quickly.

"Your son disobeyed orders and turned on me first… going behind my back to make arrangements with Sloane, not realizing I knew what he was up to, of course. His ego was getting the best of him… just like his father." Irina replied with a smile, knowing it would only enrage the man more.

'Julian? Julian? Son? Working for my mother? In CIA custody?' Sydney's mind raced trying to put the pieces to this puzzle together as quickly as it unfolded. 'Oh my God!' Sudden realization dawning on her, 'Sark! Julian Sark!'

"How could you turn on your own family, Irina? Selling him out like that." The man growled angrily.

"She's a professional at turning on her 'family' remember, though now seems to be the contradiction." The man in the grey suit had slipped into the room again behind Irina, with gun leveled at her head. Sydney had seen him coming but was unable to warn her mother as she could not speak or move her body. This man, Sydney now recognized as Gerard Cuvee.

"The Royal Russian Whore returns to save her bastard American offspring, though… as delighted as I am to see you again, Irina… I am terribly disappointed in you." Cuvee said, walking closer towards Irina until the gun he held was touching the back of her skull. Sliding the barrel of the gun around her head and down her cheek suggestively, he continued, "I thought we 'cured' you of this problem in Kashmir."

Sydney could see her mother visibly tense at the man's words and touch, though Irina remained still and said nothing.

"All that time you 'were held captive', isn't that what you told me," Cuvee said cocking his head to one side with a wicked grin, "by the CIA… has diseased you again. Another round of 'treatment' may be in order when we are finished here with you, I think."

Irina could barely swallow as she felt the bile rising in her throat at Cuvee and the memories he was ripping out of the dark places inside her.

Cuvee pressed the gun into her cheek harder. "Drop your gun onto the table." He demanded.

Irina looked at him confused, he was asking her to place a loaded weapon directly on the table in front of her daughter, who's outstretched hands could reach the gun in seconds.

Cuvee read her mind and once again motioned Irina to put the gun on the table. Irina had no choice but to comply."I see what you're thinking," He said as she slowly put the gun on the table. "But she can't get the gun… she's been drugged and can't move. The power to save you…just within her reach… but she won't be able to save you, Irina."

Irina, now very confused as to why they wanted her, stared intently into Sydney's eyes, not wanting to lose what might be their final contact and hoping her daughter could see in her eyes that she loved her.

"You fell right into our trap… you stupid whore! They have certainly infected you again." Cuvee hissed and slithered his way within centimeters of Irina's face, so close she could feel his hot breath on her, yet she remained silent as Cuvee continued with his tirade, and wishing for the first time in her life that the CIA would hurry and get there.

"Even after you recent betrayal in Kashmir… I thought you deceived me, just as you'd done the CIA… so you could have Rambaldi all to yourself… I almost admired you for that, turning on us both like you did… meant I really had created a 'masterpiece' in you." Cuvee smiled nuzzling her ear with his nose all the while keeping his gun firmly pressed into her cheek.

Irina closed her eyes, trying to compartmentalize her feelings in this situation and think of a way out.

"But…" Cuvee continued, pulling back slowly and pushing the gun barrel harder into Irina's face as a horrified Sydney watched, "Arvin here, told me that he suspected you really did still have feelings for your 'precious Jack and Sydney,' which is what caused you ultimately to betray your partnership with him as well. So when he proposed this business opportunity to me, I could hardly say 'No.'"

***Che Valiers De Sangreal***

Irina opened her eyes and finally spoke, this time staring directly at Sloane. "What business proposal is that? And what do you, or you," she said turning her eyes from Sloane to Pytor, "get in return?"

"Well Irina," Sloane began moving closer to Sydney, placing his hands on her shoulders, rubbing them as he spoke, making both Sydney's and Irina's blood boil at his vile touch, "We, meaning you and I, were incorrect in believing Sydney was The Chosen One in The Prophecy…" Sloane paused at Irina's confused expression, "With the parts of the Rambaldi device we obtained and assembled, I thought finally… I would be able to realize the word of Rambaldi. But when the machine was activated, the Di Rengo Heart shattered… leaving a small block with the word 'PEACE' on it." He paused to gauge Irina's reaction, her face remained in a puzzled expression, unbelieving that the masterpiece of Rambaldi's work would be the simple phrase of 'PEACE.' "I know," he began again, "I was just as puzzled by this as you… so I began to investigate it further… and you'll never believe what I discovered." He smiled, enjoying this slow torturing of Irina that Cuvee had just had. "Under closer examination, each letter in the word PEACE contained another smaller letter inscribed in the delicate artwork… when put together, these small letters formed a name." He paused again, really enjoying the agony he knew this was putting Irina in. "The name was yours, Irina. I. R. I. N. A," He spelled her name out slowly to accentuate his point.

Irina was stunned silent, barely breathing at the revelation.

"You shouldn't be so surprised, after all, Irina means 'peace' in your native Russian tongue, in many languages actually. It all made sense and yet, it didn't… I couldn't figure out the connection until I spoke with Pytor here and found out you were cousins… not just any relation… but 'The One.'" He smiled his evil grin as Irina quickly turned her gaze to Sydney to see 'if or what' of this she was comprehending…

Sydney only stared back at her, confused as ever by what this all meant.

"So now what?" Irina asked almost defiantly, the barrel of the gun digging into her face as she stood firm and tall against its pressure.

"Well," Sloane's eyes narrowed, "First, I need your body in order to complete the work of Rambaldi and when I'm finished with you-"

Cuvee jumped in, "Your body belongs to me!"

Irina's eyes darted to Cuvee's and Sydney could read the panic in them.

"For another round of 'treatment,' of course… hopefully this time you'll be more willing but, if not… I'll take it anyway and then take pleasure in killing you… slowly." Cuvee hissed in Irina's ear before licking her face suggestively with a disgusting laugh of enjoyment.

Irina was sure she would vomit at any moment; she could taste the bile now.

"And when you're dead," piped in Pytor, "I'll finally get what's rightfully mine… All of it!"

Irina turned her attention back to Sydney, who now had tears forming in her eyes threatening to fall at any moment. Sydney had come to realize, that she had been the bait in this trap, and her mother had fallen for it.

"Do with me what you will." Irina replied in an icy tone, her eyes never leaving Sydney's, "But let Sydney go… she has nothing to do with this."

"Oh, but I think she will prove useful to me…" Cuvee turned his leering glare to Sydney, "What are you now? About twenty-seven?" Sydney's eyebrows creased when the man had guessed her age perfectly and upon seeing her reaction Cuvee knew, he'd guessed correctly. "I take that would be a, yes." He smiled his piggish grin turning his attention back to Irina. "How ironic she is about the same age you were when you were extracted…"

Irina tensed at the memory, her concern immediately short-circuiting to fear for her daughter.

"So young…" Cuvee leered at Sydney, "beautiful and full of fire, just like your mother was. But any wild horse can be tamed, some take longer then others…" he turned his attention back to Irina, "but they are all 'breakable' in the end. Aren't they, Irina?"

It was a rhetorical question that sent another wave of nausea rushing through Irina as she so desperately tried to keep her emotions in check and the contents of her stomach… in her throat. Sydney had seen the flash of pain across her mother's face and the desperate need for control she was trying to hold on to.

"She's of no use to you, Gerard, you have me… And besides, keeping her will only attract more attention then you care for from the CIA." Irina's tone was completely unwavering. Showing no signs of the turmoil raging within.

"Oh, but Irina… I think she could prove to be useful where you're concerned, in your 'treatments'… Just like she was last time, only now… she'll be here in the flesh." Cuvee sneered.

Irina's mind raced back to her time spent in 'treatment' at the prison in Kashmir, and she started panicking to find a way to get Sydney out of this situation. "It's no use, Gerard… You can't use her against me this time. She was my baby then, and yes, I was emotionally attached to her when I was extracted but I feel nothing for her now."

A surge of pain rushed through Sydney's heart at her mother's cold words and Irina could see the pain she had caused, and the confusion… She looked deeply into Sydney's eyes, willing her to see that she didn't mean what she was saying, "She's my enemy, remember? She shot me and has been hunting me like an animal for the CIA. She's grown up to be her father's daughter."

The tears that had been welling in Sydney's eyes began to fall and it was tearing Irina apart inside but it was the only way to save Sydney from her same fate.

"I don't believe you, you are the master manipulator remember, this I know about you." Cuvee pushed the gun even further into Irina's face causing her to lean to the side from the pressure he was putting upon her temple. "You wouldn't have come here to rescue here tonight if that were true."

"I didn't come here to rescue her." Irina hissed back at him, knowing this needed to be convincing, she pressed her head back against the gun barrel even more, standing up tall again, unafraid of his manipulations. "I came here to kidnap her from you, so that I could use her as leverage against the CIA."

"If… that's true," Cuvee smiled and reached into jacket pocket extracting a large six inch boning knife, "then this test should be easy for you."

***Malleus Mareficarum* (repeat)**

'Oh God No!' Irina and Sydney thinking together. The last test Irina was put to by Cuvee resulted in her shooting Sydney and she couldn't imagine what this was going to be. 'Where the hell was the CIA?' Irina wandered desperately, not caring at the moment if they did arrest her, as anything would be better then going through 'treatment' with Cuvee again. She could live with prison in a nice glass cell, she could even live with the Death Penalty, but she could not live through another Kashmir.

"Though last time," Cuvee continued interrupting her thoughts, "you were pretty convincing I must say, shooting her and all." Cuvee kept the gun pointed at Irina's head with his left hand and the knife in his right, hovering over Sydney's hand on the table, where it lay spread out, Sydney unable to move from the drugs in her system.

"What are you doing?" Sloane asked stepping forward, in a half annoyed-half worried tone. "This was not part of the plan. The plan was to use Sydney as bait for Irina and then let her go. That was the plan I agreed to."

"Yes, Arvin," Cuvee hissed back annoyed that he was interrupted, "That was the plan but the plan has changed. If Irina passes, Sydney goes free."

Irina had an idea as to what he was about to do... If she stood by and watched… did nothing to stop him, showed no emotion, Sydney would go free… but Irina couldn't stand the thought of having to hurt her daughter again for this man she despised more then anything.

Just as Cuvee was bringing the knife down, Irina lunged forward pushing Sydney's hand out of the way, replacing it with her own left hand, grabbing her gun still lying on the table with the right hand and leveling it on Sloane. The pain was excruciating as the knife went through the back of her hand, effectively pinning it to the table, just as she had done to Stuka in Bangkok. The crunch of the bones could be heard loudly and everyone in the room was silent, including Irina who made no sound at all.

Sydney was in shock staring at her mother's hand pinned to the table in front of her, Irina's gun aimed directly over her shoulder trained on Sloane. She had seen more horrific things in her line of work, but this was the first time she'd witnessed her own mother being so protective of her. Irina, 'The Man,' had actually allowed herself to be stabbed in order to save her daughter from the pain.

"Drop your gun." Irina ordered this time to Cuvee whose gun was still trained on her head. Cuvee frozen in the moment and still in shock from what she'd done remained still. "I said," Irina sighed growing more impatient with the situation, on the verge of a blackout from loss of blood, "Drop. Your. Gun. Or I won't hesitate to kill Sloane."

Sloane's eyes growing wide, knowing Irina Derevko meant business, especially after allowing herself to be stabbed.

"I have a gun trained on your head, and you have one hand pinned to a table, and you're giving me orders? You. Drop your gun." Cuvee smiled back with a sickening laugh amused by what she'd done to herself.

"If you don't drop it I 'will' shoot Sloane." Irina stated again; her eyes narrowing in on Sloane.

"Seems, we have a stalemate." Pytor backed away one step before freezing, something out the window catching his eye.

From the building across the street, Jack and the team couldn't believe their eyes. The view was partially blocked by pillars but through their night vision goggles, Jack could clearly make out Sydney, sitting in a chair behind a table, Sloane behind her, the man named Lazarey to Sydney's left, Cuvee; and in front of the table was Irina… holding a knife in one hand and pointing a gun to Sydney's head with the other. 'She had been involved! This was a trap damn it!' Jack thought to himself. Jack saw Cuvee's arm move next to Irina but her body was blocking him from seeing what was going on. Whatever was going on was intense and sure the hell didn't look good as they watched the interaction and body language.

"We have to move in now!" Vaughn insisted, fastening his clip to the repel line, his fear for Sydney evident to all. "Jack, you are under orders that if given the opportunity, you use the 'Shoot To Kill' order on Derevko, do it… or I will." He threatened, fear for Sydney's life taking control over all logic.

"I give the orders around here, Agent Vaughn! Hold your fire!" Jack barked back at him, a glare in his eyes. "We don't know enough about what the situation is to move at the moment." Jack couldn't quite figure it out but his gut was telling him there was more then meets the eye going on in that room and he should wait.

"Don't know enough about the situation?" Vaughn raised his voice in frustration, "The psychotic monster, that is Sydney's mother, is about to kill her while we sit out here and watch!" Vaughn moved as if to get up and Jack grabbed his arm. "Jack, you're her father for crying out loud! Are you just going to stand there and watch while Irina Derevko savagely murders another member of the CIA?" His thoughts immediately rushing to his father's demise at the hands of the same 'psychotic monster.' "It's an order, Jack… either you take the shot or I will!"

After a long silence, gun still trained on Sloane, Irina took a deep breath and using all the strength she could muster, began pulling her arm upwards, trying to free her pinned hand by the knife wedged into the table. The blade, extremely sharp, had plunged deep into the table's wooden surface and wasn't about to give… Irina's hand, however, was… and the harder she pulled against the table the further the knife went through her hand until it reached the handle and could go no further.

Just when Sydney thought she couldn't stand to watch anymore, and Irina was about to pass out on the floor… Irina gave her hand one last 'yank,' and the knife pulled free from the table. She held her hand up with the knife now completely through it, and blood running in rivers down her arm.

"No tears, Irina. You are truly a masterpiece," Cuvee leered at Irina once again in his sick amusement of the whole situation, "Just remember, you wouldn't be able to do that if I hadn't of conditioned you as I did in Kashmir."

***O Fortuna***

At the mentioning of Kashmir and what it had done to her, Irina snapped. In an instant, she had crossed her arms, lunged, and effectively shot Sloane in the shoulder and stabbed Cuvee in the neck, with his knife still protruding through her hand, but not before Cuvee fired off a couple rounds from his own gun. One ricocheting off the metal table leg and into Lazarey killing him instantly and the other… into Irina's chest as her momentum carried her forward.

Sydney, unable to move, watched in horror as her mother and Cuvee simultaneously sank to the floor covered in blood.

About the same time Irina lunged at Cuvee and shot Sloane, the CIA team had moved in, spraying gun fire everywhere as they approached on the zip-line in through the window Irina had previously crashed though. Irina, gasping for breath, dropped her gun long enough to remove the knife from her hand before picking it back up and whirling to meet the oncoming assault of CIA agents. Cuvee gasping for breath slithered his way across the floor.

With the agents still coming in on the zip-line, Irina saw this as her one chance to escape and forced herself to stand with gun raised and ran the best she could, firing in their direction, but not at them, to give her cover while she headed for the door.

Jack was the first to reach the building and upon seeing Sydney motionless and covered in blood, and Irina running for the door firing at them… assumed the worst and started firing at Irina.

Just as she made it to the door Irina felt the sting of another bullet rip across her flesh…this time her abdomen. She fell backwards out the door and into the hall, slamming into the wall. A horrific scream of "Nooooooo!" ceased everyone's fire. The scream had belonged to Sydney watching her mother fall backwards into the hall after her father had shot her.

Irina's eyes lifted from her wound to the face of her shooter, Jack, who was momentarily paralyzed by Sydney's scream and the fact he'd actually shot Irina. Irina took the opportunity and dove for the stairwell making her way to down the stairs by a combination of running, sliding and falling.

Weiss and Dixon, who'd both just untangled themselves from the line, began to run after Irina, Cuvee, and Sloane, who were also making their getaway out an Emergency Exit door. Jack stood motionless, staring out the door at the bright red blood smear Irina had left on the white wall before she vanished yet again.

Vaughn meanwhile ran directly to Sydney's side. "She's bleeding severely but I can't tell where she's been hit!" He cried out as the team medic approached, bringing Jack back to reality he rushed to Sydney's side as well. She was lying on her side covered in blood and crying profusely but unable to speak.

"She's not hit," The medic informed them, scouring Sydney's body for any fresh bullet wounds and finding none, "It's not her blood." He announced to the relieved crowd now gathering around her. "She's been drugged though and I don't want to give her anything to reverse the paralysis until I know for sure what's she's been given. We'll have to take her to a hospital right away." He began talking into his headset, requesting medical extraction for Sydney and a clean-up crew for Lazarey's body.

"She's gone." Announced a breathless Dixon referring to Irina.

"Cuvee and Sloane are gone too." Weiss added joining Vaughn and Jack back at the room with Sydney.

"I think we should call in for backup to look for her," Dixon breathed heavily looking at Jack in reference to Irina, "From the looks of the blood trail she left, she's lost a lot of blood…" He paused conscious of Sydney's presences, who, though unable to speak at the moment, was listening intently. "I don't think she's going to get very far."

Jack had to force himself to swallow the lump in his throat as his mouth had gone completely dry. He looked back to the doorway where Irina's body had smeared the white walls with fresh blood and then to the table in front of him, covered in a pool of blood now running onto the floor. 'If this was her blood too, he had no idea how she was going to survive…' "Contact all the hospitals within a 100 mile radius for a woman with a… multiple gunshot wounds," he corrected himself, remembering he'd shot her as well, "And check all the airports." Jack sighed his attention going back to Sydney now being loaded in to the back of their van.

"Did anybody see what happened while we were on our way in?" Weiss asked, the first to bring it up as they sat in silence on the drive to the hospital.

"No," Vaughn almost whispered, concentrating on holding Sydney's hand for the moment. "Jack was in front of me blocking my view, I couldn't see anything… only hear the gunshots."

"Jack-" Dixon began but was cut off.

"I don't know! I couldn't tell what was going on, it all happened so fast and I was trying to concentrate on getting into that building and then when I landed all I saw was Sydney, covered in blood, and Irina running for the door, shooting so I shot back." His eyes fell to his trembling hands for a split second showing his emotions getting the best of him before quickly pulling it back together. "Marshall," Jack commanded into his headpiece.

"Yes, sir… Working on it right now." Marshall replied from the front of the van where he was working feverishly behind his laptop.

Jack only hoped that the video feed of the mission combined with Sydney's statements could clear up the confusion in his brain, and ease his conscience. He wanted desperately to believe he made the right move… That Irina had betrayed them and put their daughter's life in danger…and it was his duty as an Officer of the CIA under a Direct Order, and as a father… to shoot Irina Derevko.

Irina had made it to her car standing by and collapsed into the backseat. Covered in blood and unable to breathe without gasping for every breath… she pressed a speed-dial number rarely used into telephone… "Katya… I need you…" Was all she could get out before passing out with the phone dropping from her blood-covered hand.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Music for the chapter (on repeat): ****_Thin Red Line _****by Hans Zimmer from****_ The Thin Red Line Soundtrack, Idyll's End _****by Hans Zimmer from****_ The Last Samurai_**

* * *

THREE

o

The CIA Team had been waiting an hour for news on Sydney when the doctor finally opened the door to the waiting room of the hospital that was deemed, 'CIA friendly.'

"She's fine." The man smiled softly, speaking in English with a heavy Russian accent looking over the four, very concerned men. "I've given her something to counteract the drug she was injected with and she has the use of her limbs back now, as well as her speech. Her X-rays showed quite a few old breaks and some very recent ones in her ribs that are healing, but not from the incident tonight."

'The fight with Allison,' they all realized but said nothing letting the man continue.

"She's okay and I will release her in a couple of hours but right now… she is a very troubled young lady. I feel she would be best off with her loved ones tonight." He tried to give a re-assuring smiling before adding, "I need a few more minutes with her and then you can come in."

"Thank you, doctor." Jack replied, shaking the man's hand before the doctor turned to leave.

"It's taken some time, but I've got it." Marshall arrived rushing in with laptop in hand. "Clear as a bell now, or crystal, I guess because bell would be something you hear and crystal is something you see…" His smile quickly fading, "Though… I don't think you're going to like what you see. I was actually able to pull together a few minutes from the main camera on the roof prior to the activation of your night-scopes… so you'll see more then you did originally through your goggles." He reluctantly hit the _Play_ button and the men gathered around to watch the video stream taken of the night's events.

***Thin Red Line***

In the first moments, everyone and everything on the video had looked exactly as they thought. From their angle on the other building, Irina, now 'clear as a crystal' as Marshall put it, was still standing in front of the table but was not leaning over it as she seemed to be when they first happened upon the scene. Heated conversation seemed to be taking place with Cuvee's arm was reaching inside his jacket pocket retrieving a knife. The action caused just enough movement for them to see that his other arm that was extended towards Irina actually contained a gun pointed directly at her head.

Jack's heart sank in his chest. Somehow, he had a feeling his conscience was going to be haunting him. Everyone watching the video became horrified when Cuvee raised the knife over Sydney's lifeless arm, preparing to stab her hand into the table and completely stunned as Irina leaned in, swiped away Sydney's arm, getting stabbed herself, then grabbed the gun and now leveled it at Sydney... Something about this didn't make any sense.

"Why would she save Sydney from Cuvee just to point a gun at her?" Weiss asked, eyes never leaving the screen. "It doesn't make any sense." He said only to be 'shushed' by Jack who was watching the rest of the events unfold.

Irina and Cuvee seemed to be conversing, her gun on Sydney, his gun on her…

"I'm gonna' be sick." Weiss added again as they watched Irina pull her hand and knife, from the wooden table, effectively pushing, or in this case pulling, the knife deeper into and through her hand. Blood was easily seen now streaming down her hand and arm.

'So it is her blood.' Jack sighed thinking back to the pool of blood on the table. 'She hadn't been holding a knife, she'd been stabbed through with one.'

Then, in one fantastic move Irina lunged, crossing the arm with the knife through her hand over the one holding the gun plunging it into Cuvee's neck, firing her gun at the same time into Sloane, not Sydney, and then two more shots rang out with both Cuvee and Derevko falling to the floor followed by Lazarey.

"She was aiming at Sloane the whole time," Jack said barely above a whisper.

"Or she missed Sydney and hit Sloane on her way down." Dixon added, still believing that the only person Irina Derevko cared about was, Irina Derevko.

They watched as they slid into the building on the zip-line and could now clearly see Derevko had been shot by Cuvee in the chest, the front of her black shirt was soaking wet, bright red blood contrasting on her skin where the bullet had entered just above her right breast, her shirt matted to her body by the blood draining from her wound. In almost slow motion, they watched as she ripped the knife from her hand and looked their way with blood already seeping from her mouth and staining her lips from her chest wound; Irina picked up her gun, running for the door and shooting all the way in their direction but towards the ceiling they could now see from the angle her arm was pointed in. And then, Jack watched in horror as he shot and the bullet pierced her abdomen, knocking her into the hallway… and out of the view of the camera. Sydney's scream of "No," was just as deafening on the video as it had been in the moment.

* * *

The doctor had come out to tell them they could see Sydney just after and the first thing she said when they entered the room was, "Mom was there to save me, Dad," and Jack's heart sank all over again, "and then you shot her!" Sydney sobbed, not being able to control her emotions any longer and angry that she was powerless the entire time to help her mother.

"Sydney, I know that now… but Sweetheart," Jack grabbed her hand, "We didn't know that at the time. What happened?"

Sydney proceeded to tell them what happened from her point of view and when she was finished everyone sat in silence, taking in what had just been said.

"There's just one thing," Jack asked after thinking a minute, "You haven't said anything about how this Lazarey guy who was involved."

"Lazarey?" Sydney couldn't place the name. "Oh my God, I almost forgot," Sydney rambled, fully awake now.

"I remember now but when Mom first arrived, I was still coming into consciousness and I actually thought she was working with them. But Lazarey, Mom called him 'Pytor,' and he called her 'cousin'... well they got into it with her about betraying him by giving 'Julian' up to the CIA… Julian as in Sark!" Seeing their looks of astonishment, she continued, "I know, it was surreal trying to piece it all together but when I did I couldn't believe it. Julian Sark is or was, Pytor Lazarey's son, and Mom is their cousin, though, I'm not sure how exactly. He seemed absolutely thrilled when Cuvee talked about killing Mom because he said, he'd 'finally get what was rightfully his when she was dead. All of it!' He stressed that part. I don't know who this guy is but it makes me sick to think that in some strange way I am related to Sark." Sydney looked around the room to the open mouthed men in the room, not sure how to gauge their reactions. After a minute of silence Sydney couldn't take it anymore… "What is going on with you guys?"

"Were sorry, Sydney, its just that… Lazarey…and Sark too, I guess, are descendents of the Romanov family." Vaughn spoke softly in bewilderment.

Now it was Sydney's turn to be stunned into silence.

"Lazarey seemingly controlled the Romanov money, giving it away as a philanthropist… and recently, as you now know, bankrolling this new organization dealing with Rambaldi, The Covenant."

"Dad, we have to find Mom and make sure she's still alive." Sydney could feel the emotions rising in her again and tried to do her best not to show them. "Sloane will stop at nothing to realize the word of Rambaldi and that somehow, involves Mom. He won't stop until he finds her. We have to get to her before he does."

"Sydney, despite your mother's efforts in helping us find you, and in saving your life tonight… she is still a wanted terrorist on the CIA list." Jack stated firmly, yet with a hint of sadness.

"She gave up Sark and helped us find you in Mexico; gave us Sloane's location of the Rambaldi artifacts… doesn't that count for something?" Sydney was growing frustrated. She wasn't exactly ready to forgive or forget all her mother's actions but she certainly wasn't ready to forget about what she'd done to help them either.

"Sydney, your mother saved your life tonight and for that," Vaughn breathed quickly, "I am grateful… but Sydney, she is also the same woman who slaughtered twelve U.S. CIA Officers including my father and I can't be so quick to forgive her as you. Irina Derevko has 30 years of lies, deceit, and murder."

"You don't have to remind me of her past, Vaughn, I remember it quite well, Thank you, I lived it too remember!" Sydney spat back removing her hand from his.

"Then why are you defending her, Sydney? She's a monster 'you' wanted dead just a couple of weeks ago, remember that?" Vaughn was getting upset and stood, prepared to leave the room.

"I know, Vaughn and you deserve justice for your father's death, and I did say that… I did wish she was dead… but I don't know…" Sydney sighed as a tear rolled down her cheek, "I realized tonight there are so many things about my mother's life I don't know… and I want the chance to find out before I condemn her for all her actions. Do I still want to find her and bring her to justice for all the things she's done to hurt everyone? Of course I do. I just don't think we 'know' all there is to know about her."

"Speaking of not knowing all there is to know about her…" Marshall cleared his voice, "We now know your mother is the one in the Prophecy Rambaldi talked about, and that she is the cousin of Lazarey, whom is a member of Imperial Romanov family… and about the connection between Rambaldi and the Romanov's and I'm just thinking… and it is just me again isn't it," sweat beginning to form on his brow again, "I'm just saying… Has anyone else considered your mother may be the connection? As the cousin of Lazarey? That she may be a Romanov as well?" He smiled nervously. "I was just thinking."

"I highly doubt it," Jack scoffed, "Nothing about the woman or her history would suggest that she is, the KGB file we obtained on her would have mentioned it." Wanting to believe the words coming out of his mouth sounded as certain as he'd like them to be. "I'm sure they're related on the other side of the family… if they're even related at all."

"Well Sark will certainly have some explaining to do." Dixon added as they left the hospital, bound for the US.

* * *

Irina could see Cuvee's face, feel his breath on her ear... his hands roaming her body, "You are always the most beautiful…" He kissed her cheek and bit the curve of her chin and she wriggled beneath him, "When you put up a fight."

"No!" Irina screamed into the darkness.

***Idyll's End***

"You're safe," a calm voice entered the fog in her mind.

Irina could feel someone touching her arm and yet she didn't feel threatened anymore. Her body too sore to put up a fight even if she was in danger.

"You got yourself into one hell of a mess this time, sister."

Irina recognized the voice immediately and opened her eyes. "Katya…" She slurred out, her mouth too dry to speak.

"Here, drink this." Katya tilted Irina's head so she could take a sip of water.

"Thank you," Irina smiled as best she could, covering her sister's hand holding the glass with her own. "For everything."

The beautiful brunette, who looked very similar to Irina, simply nodded. "I knew you had to be desperate to call me." Katya placed the glass on the nightstand next to the bed and sat on the edge of the bed next to Irina. "I thought you were dead when Dmitri pulled up and opened the car door." She looked seriously into Irina's eyes before a small nervous laugh escaped, "You're going to give that poor old man a heart attack, Rina."

Irina had to smile, pain suddenly cursing through her face. Her hand immediately going to touch the swollen, tender, area where the gun had been pressed against her.

"You have one hell of a bruise there. I've been icing it every few hours the last couple of days." Katya brought her finger up to lightly touch the area of Irina's temple with her fingers.

"Days?" Irina asked startled.

"Yes, you've been out for almost two full days now. You woke right after we got you into the jet but passed out again almost immediately. You lost a lot of blood," Katya smiled her eyes going to the bandage on the crease of her own elbow. "Good thing we have the same blood type," she smiled. "I'll go get the doctor… tell him you're awake now; you have a lot to talk about." She was about to leave when Irina grabbed her hand to stay.

"Thank you, Katya," Irina said looking directly into sister's eyes, wanting her to see she really meant it. "You saved my life."

"Just returning the favor, though who's counting anymore, right?" Katya smiled.

"Yes, but you didn't have to… you could have easily just let me bleed to death and I wouldn't have blamed you." Irina said in all seriousness.

"No… I couldn't have. No matter what kind of relationship you and I have or don't have… I know you'll be there for me in desperate times and have been… Rina, no matter what," Katya paused, "No matter what you've done... I want you to know that I will always be here when you need it the most. You have always taken care of everyone else, been the strong one… but you don't have to be all the time."

"Like now," Irina smiled the best she could and startled to hear her sister speaking of such things. "I'm letting my little sister take care of me."

"Letting me!" Katya laughed as she stood walking towards the door. "Always in control aren't you Irina?" She shook her head at her sister's need to feel in control of everything in her life, knowing why. "Anything else you can let me do for you, Your Highness?" Katya smirked as Irina closed her eyes and chuckled, painfully. "I'll get the doctor, and then you and I can catch up on the last few years of our life… though I bet you know everything about me already with your 'spies' that keep tabs on me when you think I'm not looking." Katya smiled leaving Irina alone with her thoughts and the first chance to really examine the 'damage.'

She was in incredible pain and was definitely going to be requesting more drugs when the doctor arrived. Her left hand was wrapped completely with a white gauze bandage from her fingers to her elbow, and immobilized with a splint so she couldn't bend it. There were at least five pins sticking out from every which direction, all holding together the bones she'd heard 'crunch' when the knife went in, and as she ripped it back out. "This isn't going to be good." Irina sighed. She couldn't see, but she felt with her fingers that her entire chest had been wrapped as well and she could also feel that her bandages were still absorbing blood from her chest wound and upon further inspection, realized there was actually a tiny tube exiting her chest with what felt like a valve, likely a chest tube she realized, though wondered about the damage that had been inflicted to necessitate such a device. She continued her 'feeling' expedition of the damage and realized her abdomen had also been wrapped. 'Jack' she sighed internally, remembering his smoking gun pointed in her direction. Her thoughts were interrupted from any further pondering with her new visitor to her room.

"Glad to see you're awake, My Dear," A white haired man with piercing blue eyes smiled entering the room. "This time… was a close call." He smiled coming to take a seat next to Irina on the bed.

"Alexei," Irina smiled and extended her good hand. "It's been so long. You look well." She squeezed the older man's hand.

"In better shape then you, though you are still beautiful as always." Alexei smiled reaching into his black bag for a stethoscope.

"What is this for?" Irina asked, pointing to the tube she could feel in her chest.

"It is to keep your lung inflated, though it has repaired itself quite well as you rested and I think we should be able to take the tube out in the next couple of days." Irina nodded in understanding and he went on, "We were able to remove the bullet from your chest, though you were extremely lucky, Child. It punctured your lung and nicked an artery… I am surprised you are still here with us today."

"You should know better, Alexei," Irina smiled, "I am too stubborn to die."

He laughed out loud in response to her admittance of being stubborn. "Your hand is in pretty bad shape I'm afraid. The knife tore several ligaments, muscle tissue, blood vessels and nerves. The bones needed to be reset with pins and I'm afraid you might lose some functions permanently." At her disheartened look, he patted her arm, "Time will tell, ok?"

Irina smiled as Katya entered the room carrying a tray of some soup and juice, setting it down on the table on the far end of the room Irina knew so well.

"It's a miracle we put up with her." Katya joked sitting on the opposite side of the massive bed.

"Speaking of miracles," Alexei covered Irina's stomach with the palm of his hand lightly with a radiant smile, "This is the most miraculous of all." Seeing Irina's look of confusion, he continued. "The bullet just grazed you. You'll have a nice sized scar when I take the stitches out but it will only continue to grow as the months go on." He chuckled.

Irina narrowed her eyebrows looking between Katya and the old man, she wasn't certain was sane anymore. "What are you talking about?" Irina asked finally.

"As your baby grows… your skin will stretch causing the scar to grow as well." Alexei said in all seriousness and then laughed as Irina's face drained of color and her eyes refused to blink.

"Excuse me," Irina rambled, "but I could have sworn you just said, 'baby.' It must be the drugs you gave me because we all know that, that... that's just not possible."

"Irina," the old man laughed, "you mean you didn't know?"

"Know what?" Irina demanded, though she knew exactly what he was talking about… a lot of things suddenly made sense and she could have slapped herself for not realizing it sooner.

"You're having a baby, Irina… in about five months or so I'd say, though we'll have to take you into the clinic to see for sure."

Irina continued to sit in silence, unable to think of anything to say, or what to do.

"When you've had more time to heal of course. But for now, I don't want you to leave this bed for more then one minute until you've given your chest wound time to heal… and the extra rest should help keep this little one," Alexei patted her stomach once again, "happy."

"Is the baby, ok?" Irina finding her words and immediately concerned, images of all the insane things she did with her body the past few months flashing through her mind. 'Being shot three times, once in the arm by Sydney… then of course her present bullet wounds, being electrocuted with shock paddles in response the other little 'gift' Jack had given her in Panama, almost being strangled to death by Neil Caplan and who could forget jumping off the roof of that building in Mexico City...'

"This one is just as stubborn as their mother. Won't give up without a fight. Right now, the baby is just fine. It's you that I am concerned for." Alexei smiled reassuring Irina. "Now, I don't suppose you're going to tell me who did this to you?" He raised his eyebrow as he listened to her lungs and heart. At Irina's silence he continued, "I didn't think so, you never do… Ok, now I want you to rest, My Dear. I'm sorry I can't give you anything for pain but we can't take the chance with the baby."

"No, I understand." Irina placed her protectively over her abdomen, her motherly instincts already in place. "I can handle the pain."

"Ok then, you get some rest and I will come check on you in the morning." Alexei smiled at the women as he packed up his bag. Leaning over kissing Irina's forehead like a little girl he smiled, "You look more like your mother everyday."

Irina felt her tears welling in her eyes but quickly thought of something else.

"Ekaterina," Alexei called out, turning from his spot near the door. "Get some sleep tonight, please. She's just fine and I don't want to have to take care of both you girls."

Katya nodded her compliance as Irina tried to conceal her surprise at hearing her sister hadn't been sleeping since her arrival.

"We'll always be 'girls' to him, no matter how old we get." Irina smiled nervously as the old man left them alone, leaving just the two of them alone.

"So," Katya turned her attention back to Irina, "you want to tell me who did this to you."

It wasn't a question, Irina knew. "What 'this,' are you referring to?" She asked stalling.

"Rina-" Katya began but Irina cut her off.

"This…" She began pointing to the still healing scar on her arm, "is payback from Sydney… I shot her and she shot me after I escaped CIA custody." Irina paused while Katya stare at her with surprised eyes but said nothing and let her finish. "And these," she pointed to her face, lifted her broken arm and pointed to her chest, "are from Gerard Cuvee."

'Well that explains the nightmares,' Katya thought to herself, noticing that her sister had finished her 'explanations' but left out a key issue. "And what about this?" She moved her eyes to Irina's stomach. "Who is did this?"

"Are you referring to the person who shot me or the father of the baby?" Irina paused only momentarily, "because they are one in the same… Jack."

Katya couldn't hide the surprise, "It seems as though we have a lot to talk about, My Dear Sister, you've been very busy. Good thing you won't be going anywhere for a while."

* * *

-Los Angeles, CA-USA-

The weekend had been anything but restful for Sydney. She was able to see Will, who was staying his parents recovering. They talked about everything and mourned the death of Francie, remembering all the great times they had together… and how much they were going to miss her. Will had said, he was going to take some time off and decide what direction his life was going to go from here. Sydney wondered the same with the new information about her mother and where that would lead...

Sydney and Jack both arrived for work Monday morning equally exhausted.

"How are you feeling?" Jack asked with concern as he saw Sydney approaching, feeling she should have taken time off before returning to work so soon after her abduction.

"Fine." Sydney replied shortly, still upset with her father for shooting her mother, though she knew she shouldn't really be. After all, only a few short months ago… she was the one who took aim at her mother. Realizing she didn't want to start the workday like this she quickly apologized. "I'm sorry Dad, I don't mean to be short with you. I am fine, a little tired, but fine." She reached for his hand giving it a squeeze. "Thank you for being concerned."

"Sydney, don't you think you should take some time off?" Jack asked still not happy with her answer.

"No… I am fine and I want to track down Sloane and Cuvee… and Mom too."

"I understand," Jack smiled softly just as Kendall approached.

"Well it wasn't a complete disaster, Jack," Kendall extended his hand to Sydney. "Welcome back, Agent Bristow."

Sydney returned the handshake and swallowed the sarcastic comment she had on the tip of her tongue at Kendall's lack of tack when it came to socializing.

"I read the debrief. Quite informative with all the new revelations about Derevko being The Chosen One in The Prophecy, Lazarey and Sark being father and son… and of course your mother and Sloane escaping once again… not unscathed this time though, or so I hear." He smiled slightly at that news.

Jack irritated as well with the man, jumped in as he saw Sydney about ready to explode. "Yes, the mission turned out to be quite informative in my opinion. We learned quite a bit and it gave us many new leads to pursue."

"With Derevko being the target of whatever Sloane and Cuvee are planning, they will no doubt recover from their wounds and go after her. We can use this to our advantage. Either they lead us to Derevko or she leads us to them, either way… with them working against each other, it should make our job a little easier in bringing them all down." Kendall smiled and disgusted Sydney and Jack. "So, which of you are going to go give Sark the news about 'Dear old Dad' and find out what he knows about this?"

"I will," Sydney immediately volunteered.

"We'll both go." Jack decided for the both of them, not wanting Sydney to do this alone.

"Fine. Get to it!" Kendall ordered.

* * *

Walking up to the glass they saw Sark meditating, just like Irina had always done in their custody. 'Something he learned from her, no doubt.' Sydney sarcastically thought.

Sark heard the clang of the gates and turned to see his visitors. "Sydney," he smiled his wicked grin, "So nice to see your back and well." His British accent suddenly becoming annoying to Sydney he continued, "I was beginning to worry for you."

"Why?" Sydney sneered, "I was with your father the whole time. Pytor Lazarey."

If Sark was surprised he didn't show it. "I have no idea what you're talking about." He looked directly into her eyes.

"No idea what? That Pytor Lazarey is your father or that he kidnapped me as bait?"

"Yes, Pytor Lazarey is my father. But I haven't spoken with him in years; we aren't close. Why would my father kidnap you for bait?" Sark asked confused.

"To capture my mother." Sydney inched toward the glass and Jack watched silently.

"What would he want with Irina?" Sark asked skeptically.

"We don't know; we were hoping you could tell us why he would want to kidnap his own cousin?"

This did surprise Sark and he said nothing.

"Your continued cooperation is necessary for your plea agreement, need I remind you." Jack finally spoke.

"I can't presume to know why my father does anything." Sark hissed in Jack's direction. "Tell me, did the plan work? Did they capture Irina?"

"No, it didn't work and your father is dead now." Sydney said coldly and then added softly, "I'm sorry for your loss."

Sark said nothing for a moment then asked, "Who killed him?"

"Cuvee attempted to shoot Irina and the bullet hit your father instead." Jack replied.

"Cuvee." Sark repeated and sniffed into the air disgusted.

"Cuvee, Sloane, and Irina all escaped… Do you have any idea where they might be or what their' next plan action might be? We have to presume that Sloane is going to go after Irina and you know more about her operation, her hideouts, then we do."

"What did they want with your mother?" Sark turned his attention to Sydney.

"Inside the Di Regno Heart was an encoded name…'Irina.' Sloane believes my mother is The Chosen One in The Prophecy."

Sark raised one eyebrow in surprise before returning to the completely emotionless tone that is, Sark. "I don't know."

"You don't know what?" Sydney asked getting flustered with his vague answers; he really had been trained by her mother.

"I don't know where Irina would hide-out if Sloane is after her. She always kept that absolutely to herself but I do know there are many. As far as what they might be planning to do next, now that they know Irina is The Chosen One in The Prophecy…" he paused, "Sloane was working on decoding two pages of the manuscript that dealt specifically with 'The Chosen One."

"What did they say?" Sydney asked eagerly.

"I don't know," Sark said dryly. "I was arrested before they were finished."

"Who was working on decoding them?" Jack asked.

"Cuvee." Sark hissed.

"Do you know where he was keeping them?" Sydney asked impatiently.

"In his office, in St. Petersburg, fourteenth floor of the Telecom International Building. It's an old KGB office that supposedly... no longer exists." Sark gave her a sly smile.

"How do I know you're not lying about this?" Sydney asked skeptically.

"Trust me cousin." Sark smiled.

"You tried to kill me on more then one occasion! Trust you?" Sydney practically screamed at him.

"And you threw an ax at me." Sark smiled again and Sydney wanted to slap him; he thought he was being so cute.

"Let's go." Jack grabbed Sydney's arm motioning her away from the glass.

"It was a pleasure working with you, Sydney… You are just like your mother." Sark said just as the first gate began rising, knowing exactly how to goad her.

Irritated, Sydney didn't give Sark the satisfaction of turning around and kept walking.

* * *

"Sydney!" Marshall called almost franticly with the excitement of a little boy as she and Jack entered the Ops Floor again. "Sydney!" he ran up to her.

"What is it, Marshall?" Sydney asked concerned seeing his distress.

"Do you have your mother's earrings with you? I mean your earrings. I mean the one's she gave you… you know the ones that send the Morris Code messages?" He asked with excitement and fluster in his voice.

Sydney was unsure where he was going with this. Vaughn, Dixon, and Weiss all tuning in as well as Jack. "Yes," Sydney replied almost embarrassed she kept them with her at all times, waiting for another message from her mother, whom she still didn't know was alive or dead. "Why?" She was afraid to ask as she retrieved them from her pocket and handed them to Marshall.

"I was just looking on the Internet… you know, just searching for information on the Romanov family after what happened this last week…" Marshall paused seeing Jack and Sydney's eyebrows narrow, "Anyway… on the website, they have a link…" He said motioning for them to follow him to his computer where he began feverishly typing.

"On what website?" Weiss asked.

"Oh," Marshall quit typing and turned to face them, "They have tons of websites about the Romanov family on the web, you know because of the horrendous way they were all murdered and the speculation for years that the Grand Duchess Anastasia survived the attack… Did anyone see the animated movie about it?" Marshall asked looking around the group. "It was good, I mean as good as a cartoon can get with talking bats and such but Meg Ryan was great. It was just her voice but-"

"Marshall!" Jack boomed, getting the man back on track.

"Oh yeah… sorry, anyway," He began typing feverishly again, "I was just looking around on the website and found this link and that's when I saw it!"

"Saw what?" Sydney asked and wondering what this had to do with her mother's earrings.

"Here… On this page about the Romanov family Royal Jewels… Look! Your earrings." He smiled holding up the two delicate earrings next to his own earlobes, grinning as everyone stared at the earrings on the screen and the earrings he had dangling next to his ears.

"Oh my God…" Sydney breathed, "It's impossible."

"No look," Marshall said holding the earrings to the screen now. "They're the same."

"They can't be, my mother said that she got these earrings from my grandmother the day she graduated from the Academy."

Jack whipped his head in Sydney's direction, never hearing the full story of the earrings before.

"Syd," Weiss said bending over looking intently between the earrings on the screen and the ones in Marshall's hand. "They are exactly the same."

"Well maybe they are," Dixon chimed in, "Derevko could have stolen them. She is the 'The Man' after all, mafia leader of Russia, remember? It fits her profile. She could have stolen them and told Sydney they were a gift from her mother."

"I wouldn't put it past her." Jack sighed.

"Well it doesn't mention anything on the website about them being stolen or missing." Marshall scrolled through the webpage, "and this is the official Russian website so I would think… well they should at least, like they do in England with missing jewels… if they were missing it would say. It doesn't say anything."

"What does it say about the earrings?" Vaughn asked.

"It just gives a description."

"These can't be the same earrings guys!" Sydney laughed, "Maybe they were made to look like them but these transmit Morris Code remember?! I don't think that real Royal jewels would do that."

"She's right." Jack stated flatly as Kendall joined the group, Marshall quickly closing the website and giving Sydney her earrings back.

"So what did you get out of Sark?" Kendall asked hands on hips as always.

"He told us Cuvee has been decoding two pages of the manuscript for Sloane and that he was keeping them in his office in St. Petersburg." Jack informed the group.

"Well, Agent Bristow," Kendall said turning to Sydney, "I hope you haven't re-adjusted to the time difference because you're headed back to Mother Russia to get those pages." He smiled. "You leave in an hour."

"She just got back." Vaughn stated the obvious in his worry.

"Yes, she did Agent Vaughn but we can't afford to let Sloane and Derevko get too far ahead of us."


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat): ****_Spies_**** by Coldplay, ****_The Russian Spy and I by The Hunters_**

* * *

FOUR

o

-Moscow, Russia-

Twenty-three hours later, Sydney in disguise, entered the tall office building where Cuvee's office was located.

"Mountaineer, this is Base Camp… any sign of Cuvee?" Vaughn asked Sydney breathless through her Com.

"Negative, Base Camp nothing yet." She exhaled softly.

"Mountaineer, this is Boy Scout, the security system should be by-passed in fifty-six seconds and counting."

"Standby," Sydney began counting the seconds in her head as she waited in the elevator. 'Go!' She heard in her earpiece and began working with the locking mechanism on the elevators security system that only allowed access to the fourteenth floor by code. "Got it!" Sydney whispered as the elevator doors slid open and she was standing in the lobby of Cuvee's office… no one there. She looked down the hall to see a woman walking away from her towards another set of doors and took the opportunity to slip into Cuvee's office.

"You have ninety seconds, Mountaineer, before the override on the alarm system will sound and give away your location."

"Roger, standby." Sydney said scanning the room for the safe. A large abstract painting hung on the wall behind Cuvee's desk, she moved the painting to the side and could see the safe's outline but no way of opening it. 'Must be a switch somewhere,' She thought rapidly feeling around the bookshelf, finding nothing. She sat behind the desk feeling under the ledge for the switch, still nothing. Sticking her head under the desk she saw a small brown button. "Bingo!" She exclaimed pressing the button. To her surprise the big grey filing cabinet in the desk flew open. Her eyes scanned the contents. Files. 'Old KGB files' Sydney took notice of the worn appearance of the folders. She began reading the names, written in Cyrillic, searching for anything to do with the Rambaldi pages.

_Reznikov, T.,_

_Gruskovskya, R.,_

_Derervko, I.,_

_Grigoriko..._

'Wait a minute!' Sydney's hand flew back to the thick file her hand had just brushed by, reading the name again. 'Derevko, I.'

"Oh my God!" She said out loud, pulling the file from the drawer.

"What is it, Mountaineer?" Vaughn's voice came through her earpiece, "Did you find them?"

"No… not yet." Sydney barely breathed as opened the file and saw the picture of a very young, Irina Derevko staring back at her.

"What is it then?" Vaughn asked trying to keep the worry out of his voice.

"My mother's KGB file…" Sydney transfixed on the photo in front of her.

"Mountaineer, we already have that file… leave it and proceed with the mission. I repeat. DO NOT REMOVE THAT FILE! You have 38 seconds left!" Vaughn knew she was getting distracted with anything to do with her mother and lacking focus on the mission putting her in more danger.

Sydney closed the file and tried to focus on the mission. Looking inside the filing drawer she had just been rummaging through, she spotted another button at the back of the drawer and pressed it. The safe opened. Sydney slammed the drawer shut and went to the safe. "Got them!" She said triumphantly as she gently slid the two plastic covered pages out of the safe with a disk, she assumed would be the codes.

"Get out! Mountaineer, you have fifteen seconds left…" Vaughn reminded her.

Sydney closed the safe; put the painting back in place, turned back to the desk, grabbed her mother's KGB file and headed for the door.

"6, 5, 4, 3, 2, …" Vaughn counted as Sydney slid back into the elevator, putting the pages and the file into her bag.

"Just made it… again." Vaughn sighed into her earpiece. "We'll see you at home."

"See you at home," Sydney repeated and walked out the door into the bright sun, her hand protectively covering her bag.

Sydney barely made it to the transport plane waiting to take her home before she dug into her bag and pulled out the file once again. This file was different then the one they already had on her mother. They looked the same in appearance but this one was about four inches thicker and contained, photographs, and disks.

***Spies***

She flipped back to the first page again. There was the picture that had captivated her in Cuvee's office. Irina had told her the she was only eighteen when she'd been recruited by the KGB, but Sydney had never really thought about how 'young' that really was. Her mother didn't look old enough to be out of high school let a lone in the KGB. Sydney had been just a little older, nineteen, when she joined SD-6, believing she was going to work for the CIA at the time. Her mother had said she joined the KGB because it was 'an honor for a woman to be asked to serve her country, and it meant empowerment and independence…' Weren't those the same reasons she had joined too? Were they the same then? The lines between the two were becoming blurry. Sydney shook her head, not wanting to confuse herself as to who was the enemy…

For the first time she read the name printed on the top of the file,

'Her Imperial Highness: Tsarevicha Irina Nikolaevna Alexandra Dmitrievna Romanova Derevkova, Grand Duchess of all Russia.'

Sydney gasped, re-reading the name several times to make sure she was translating it correctly. 'This can't be!' She scanned the rest of the page. 'Born: December 15th, 1954… wait a minute… that's not right… Father: Dmitri Vladimirovich Derevko… Born 1901… ok so that is the same.' She sighed happy to recognize something from the other file she had memorized the moment she found out the truth about her mother. 'Mother: Her Imperial Majesty: Tsarina Anastasia Nikolaevna Romanova, Empress of all Russia... Born 1901… Oh My God!' This was most definitely not in the other file. The other file had said her grandmother's name was Anya… "Anya as in Anastasia," Sydney could barely breathe; unable to process any thoughts as she eagerly read on… 'Siblings: Her Imperial Highness: Ekaterina Victoria Tatiana Dmitrievna Romanova Derevkova, Grand Duchess of all the Russia's… Born: January 20th, 1956...' "She has a sister!" Sydney almost shouted. Something else that was 'left out' of the KGB file they had received. The one they had said that Irina had been an only child. 'She has a sister!' Sydney was growing angrier by the second, yet something else her mother had lied about! She really didn't know anything about her mother except her life was one giant lie after another.

First, she was just her mother, Laura Bristow, an English Literature Professor at UCLA… then it was Irina Derevko, Russian KGB officer… but that wasn't all either, of course, Sydney then found out Irina was "The Man," international terrorist and mafia leader… and now, she yet another layer to this woman's crazy identity… she was Russian Royalty and the daughter to a myth! "Oh my God," Sydney suddenly remembering what Cuvee had said when her mother first entered the room in Moscow, 'Royal Russian Whore!' Royal… Why hadn't she remembered that earlier? None of this was making any sense; the information in front of her was only causing more questions to arise within… She began flipping madly through the file, stopping whenever a photo was present.

All of the photos, except for the first, seemed to be taken without the knowledge of Irina. There were photos of a young Irina talking to groups of other children, running, doing ballet, sitting on park benches reading, walking in and out of various buildings, holding hands with a man whose face couldn't be seen… and suddenly, a photo of her father appeared… and then more photos of her father and mother together, studying in the library, walking barefoot on the beach, him pushing her on a swing, both smiling madly... kissing… her mother teaching, getting into her car… talking with a man Sydney didn't recognize but from the various photos of the man with her mother, Sydney devised he must have been her handler. Anger began seething within Sydney as the photographic 'evidence' of her mother's fabricated life went by… photo after photo of her parents in loving poses: kissing, holding hands, her mother and father in the park together… It was making Sydney feel ill… they seemed so happy, her father so in love with this woman who was deceiving him day after day…

'She deserves an Academy Award, her acting was superb,' Sydney thought looking at the photos. A photograph of her parents wedding… and then a very pregnant Irina followed… Sydney's heart was breaking staring at the photo. Her father was sitting, leaning against a tree in the park, reading a book as her mother's head lay in his lap, her hands surrounding her very large belly, his hands in her hair.

The following page contained a photo of newborn Sydney in her hospital records. Her eyes were open wide, rare for a newborn, like she was curious about the world from day one… One eyebrow furrowed, just as she's done all her life when she was thinking. Her perfectly round head covered in thick, jet-black hair forming a natural Mohawk down the center of her head.

The next photo Sydney recognized and wondered how the KGB had gotten a hold of a copy. Her father had taken the photo, one Sydney had always adored until the day she learned the truth about her mother… and then in anger and hurt, threw the photo into the fireplace along with every other photo she had of her mother. It was taken in black and white, a close-up, of Irina and Sydney. Irina had fallen asleep rocking a very newborn Sydney to sleep. Sydney, perched on her mother's chest sleeping, one hand protectively around her baby, Irina's face was nuzzled against Sydney's soft black hair… a soft smile on her face even though she was sleeping, both, completely at peace. More photos of Irina and Jack; Irina and Sydney; Jack, Irina and Sydney were on the following pages. Sydney hadn't looked at any photos from her childhood since meeting her mother face to face again and now, looking at the photos Sydney couldn't help but wonder if the love she saw in her mother's eyes and touch… was all part of the act or was actually real?

She closed the file, unable to look at it anymore… fresh tears were coming to her eyes. She needed to talk to someone about all of this, what she was feeling… things she didn't understand. 'Vaughn…' Sydney sighed wiping the now steady stream of tears. She wanted so badly to be able to talk to him about this; they talked about everything else but the subject of her mother had always been tense… she couldn't blame him. Her mother had killed his father in the most gruesome way… And her father, well she wasn't exactly 'close' with him, though they had certainly gotten closer since her mother had come back into their lives… Ironic, as it had been her mother's leaving, that tore them a part. Her father had too many unresolved issues where her mother was concerned, and no doubt this was only going to add to it.

There were too many unanswered questions where her mother was concerned. The more answers they got, the more questions they had… like 'Is this the 'real' file, or the other one? Which is the lie? Which one is meant to be the manipulation?' Sydney stuffed the file back into her bag angrily. Her life resembled a Soap Opera more and more every day. No one's lives seemed as insane as hers… her entire life was one lie after another.

* * *

When she landed in the Los Angeles, it was 8 A.M. 'Might as well go to work.' Sydney grabbed her bag and told the driver to take her to Ops. She had to get the files on Rambaldi to Kendall, and tell them she'd disobeyed a Direct Order, once again, and had taken the file on her mother she wasn't authorized to remove. She only hoped that their surprise at its contents would serve as a buffer for her punishment.

"Syd… Good morning." Vaughn met her with his adorable smile at the door. She said nothing but smiled back as they continued to walk into Opts. "I know you must be tired from the mission, but I was thinking… later, after you've had time to sleep… we could grab some dinner and make those plans to go to Santa Barbara."

"I would love to." Sydney smiled back, causally bumping into him… they both laughed.

"Agent Bristow." Kendall boomed from across the room, striding rather quickly to meet them. "Congratulations on the mission," he said dryly, accepting the files on Rambaldi; his mind obviously occupied by them. "We'll get Marshall on this right away."

Jack had just arrived and made his way over to the group. "Sydney." He nodded in acknowledgment; relieved she was home safely once again.

"Agent Vaughn told me that you discovered another file with your mother's name on it in Cuvee's desk and stupidly told you to leave it there!" Kendall eyed Vaughn.

Jack hadn't heard about such file and was also immediately furious at Vaughn for telling Sydney to leave it behind, though he didn't believe it would contain anything on Irina he didn't already know. He had spent the last twenty-one years analyzing the woman and was sure he knew everything about her… as far as the KGB was concerned. Anything else about the woman completely bewildered him… she was predictable, yet unpredictable all at once.

"What were you thinking?" Kendall accused Vaughn believing whatever file Cuvee had on Irina had to have some sort of leads in it.

"I was thinking about getting Sydn- Agent Bristow," he corrected himself, "out of the office in time, with the Rambaldi material, her main objective… as soon as possible." Vaughn, now confident in his decision, stood a little taller. "I didn't believe the file Cuvee had on Derevko was necessary to the CIA, as we already have her KGB files on record."

"Suddenly you're in a position where you get to decide what is and isn't necessary information to the CIA?" Kendall glared at Vaughn and Sydney saw the vein in his neck begin to throb. She decided to take the heat off Vaughn.

"Actually, I have the file." Sydney looked at Vaughn and could read the hurt and anger in his eyes. Not wanting to face his wrath about the file at that particular moment, she turned back to her father and Kendall. "I had a chance to glance over the file on the way home… It would seem this is either the most elaborate scheme ever conceived, which I wouldn't put past my mother… or Marshall was correct about the earrings… and my mother is a Romanov." She pulled the file out of her bag, handing it over to Kendall, who was looking very perplexed and a little pale. "And not just any Romanov, but 'thee' Romanov…" She paused to look her father in the eye knowing he was going to be floored by this information as well, "According to this file, my mother's birth certificate reads, Her Imperial Highness: Tsarevicha Irina Nikolaevna Alexandra Dmitrievna Romanova Derevkova, Grand Duchess of all Russia... eldest daughter of Her Imperial Majesty: Tsarina Anastasia Nikolaevna Romanova, Empress of all Russia. "

Kendall's eyes flashed wide in surprise and he flipped open the file immediately, scanning the contents of the first page. Jack too stunned to move, continued to stare at Sydney. "That's impossible." Jack finally found his voice, "Anastasia Romanov was murdered along with the entire Royal family July 17th, 1918. Her survival a mere myth, proved false when her bones were identified with DNA technology in 1998. This is obviously another manipulation." His anger growing at the thought of this sick and twisted game continuing and the preposterous idea that Irina could be related to royalty.

"This file also says Mom was born in 1954, not 1952… and that she wasn't an only child… she has a younger sister… Ekaterina."

Jack grabbed the file from a surprised Kendall, immediately coming face to face with Irina's photograph. His reaction had been the same as Sydney's… she looked impossibly young… and innocent… A word he would never had used when referring to Irina Derevko now, to be a Field Operative in the KGB. His eyes scanned the page, absorbing the information Sydney had just told him.

"How are we supposed to know which of the two files we have, is the real file… or if either are for that matter?" Kendall ranted on, "Is 'anything' we have on this woman the truth?"

"I know, it doesn't make any sense to me either but this file is quite a bit thicker then the other and contains far more information and photos… There are also two disks in the back that I'm sure, contain even more information on them. Most of the photos in there are taken without Mom's knowledge… like they were keeping tabs on her." Sydney offered.

"Most?" Kendall asked looking over Jack's shoulder to see the file. Jack began flipping the pages to see the same photos of Irina that Sydney had the night before. It certainly did appear that she wasn't aware of the photographer. Jack also realized these were pictures he never seen of Irina, in all his research.

"Yes, most," Sydney continued, "There is one I know my father took."

Jack's eyes darted up from the page to Sydney's. He flipped through the pages… pain and anger rising inside him as he saw his life with 'Laura' unfolding in KGB surveillance photographs. First, their courtship…then their wedding, her pregnancy… Sydney! Jack's pulse began to race at seeing his newborn daughter's picture in a KGB file, knowing that it made sense as she was Irina's daughter too and this was 'the file of her lie,' but at the same time he was terrified they had been keeping tabs on Sydney too. He flipped the page and saw the photo he had taken, one he knew well but hadn't looked at in twenty-one years.

"I can't believe that is Irina Derevko, she certainly looks convincing in the role of loving mother." Kendall slapped Jack on the back, as if to say, 'Hey, I can see now how you were fooled by this woman for eleven years. Sucks to be you.' "I'm going to get Marshall started on decoding these Rambaldi disks, and the one in this file… Maybe they will give us some insight about all this. Jack, I am putting you in charge of investigating whether this file is the 'real deal' or just another elaborate scheme. Maybe there is something in there that will lead us to her location."

"I want to help." Sydney chimed in.

"Me too." Vaughn was curious if this file had anything more about why she was ordered to kill his father.

"No." Jack said flatly, with not wanting his daughter more emotionally ravaged by her mother's lies then she already had been.

"Dad…" Sydney protested, "I can handle this. I know I can help."

"I agree, this is the only lead we have at the moment and the more people working on it, the faster we locate Derevko." Kendall removed the disks from the back of the file and strode off to find Marshall.

Jack looked at Sydney and Vaughn for the moment, relaying the message with his eyes, he was not happy to have them involved… they were too emotionally involved… but then again… wasn't he? "Just remember that I am in charge here and anything I say is final." He slammed the file shut. "Vaughn, get on the Xenon system, we're going to need it to decode what this file says. Meet us in the conference room… we can work in there." As soon as Vaughn was out of earshot, Jack turned to Sydney. "I mean it, Sydney, what I decide is final. If I decide at any moment you are too emotionally involved I will remove you from this investigation are we clear?"

"Perfectly… and what about you?" Sydney was pissed at her father for treating her as a child instead of an agent. She also knew that he was just as 'emotionally' involved in this as she and Vaughn were, if not more. He had tried to execute her mother on false pretenses he'd been so 'emotionally' involved.

"I've been doing this a long time, Sydney, I can handle this. Don't doubt my abilities." Jack was unnerved that his daughter had seen and known of his own weakness when it came to Irina Derevko.

"And don't doubt mine." Sydney turned on her heel and headed for the conference room.

***The Russian Spy And I ***

Hours of poring over decoded files revealed information they already knew, and other information that was completely new. Jack had met 'Laura' shortly before her nineteenth birthday in 1971; he had taken her to a Chinese restaurant in Georgetown to celebrate. They hadn't known each other very long but it was a significant turning point in their relationship… it was the first time he had kissed her goodnight. According to this new file, they had actually been celebrating her seventeenth birthday, and she hadn't been twenty-one when they were married in 1974, but nineteen.

"She was so young." Sydney sighed looking at another photograph of her young mother's smiling face.

"About the same age as you when you started at SD-6." Jack reminded her as he began mental calculations in his head coming to a startling conclusion. 'My God… she was only sixteen years old when we first met… Seventeen when we started dating!' Jack thought to himself in disbelief… 'She was a baby!' The KGB was incredible to send 'a baby' into enemy territory, though he was none the wiser, she was brilliant and certainly didn't act like a child. He closed his eyes blinking hard as mental pictures of her skills in the bedroom suddenly flashed before him.

"Yeah… but my missions were nothing like this. To move to an entirely foreign place… the country of your enemy at sixteen! Marry and have a baby… she was only twenty when she had me and twenty-six… when she left." Sydney was twenty-seven and couldn't imagine making decisions like her mother had made.

"It says here she was ordered to terminate her pregnancy… She refused on grounds she was 'already too far along to terminate without putting her own health at risk." Vaughn looked up from the paper he had been decoding.

Jack glanced quickly over at Sydney, having a hard time swallowing thinking about if Irina hadn't refused, even if her' reasons for not terminating had been selfishly her own. Sydney was having a hard time digesting the information too; her mother hadn't terminated her, not because she wanted Sydney… but because she didn't want to jeopardize her own health.

"It also notes that they later saw it, your birth… as an asset in securing Jack's trust in her, and as a method of manipulation if necessary against… your mother."

Jack's fist clenched tightly at the thought of his daughter being used as a tool of manipulation.

"Well that would explain these." Sydney placed various photos on the table so both Jack and Vaughn could see them. The images in the photos made Jack's blood run cold. Sydney, being dropped off at the babysitter, her playing in the backyard… being dropped off at piano lessons, school… on the playground. Photos cataloging the opportunities where Sydney was left vulnerable, without Jack or Irina with her… opportunities that the KGB could get to their daughter if necessary.

Jack wondered if Irina was aware the danger she had put their daughter in, the anger once again rising within him. He took a deep breath to calm himself. 'Don't let her get to you!' He reminded himself he was supposed to compartmentalize this, stay unemotional, as were his own orders. Jack returned his attention to the documents in front of him.

Vaughn glanced over the photo of Sydney from the hospital and chuckled.

"What?" Sydney smiled at him, wondering what could be so amusing.

"You still do that." Vaughn turned the photo over to show her what he was laughing at. "That thing… With your eyebrow… you still do that when you're concentrating. You were such a cute baby… I love the Mohawk." Vaughn caught Jack's intense gaze and his face quickly lost its smile.

'The eyebrow thing,' Jack thought unnerved, as it was yet, something else Sydney had inherited from Irina. Back to business was the clear message his eyes sent.

* * *

At 11:30 P.M. Kendall burst through the door to the conference area. "So what do you think?"

Jack became unnerved by the question; his nerves were that way a lot since Irina had come back into their lives. "It's too soon to say. We've worked all day and so far have only eight pages completely decoded. This is going to take a while."

"Well how long is awhile, Jack? This is the only lead we have and I need to know if its legitimate Intel about Derevko or another wild goose chase!"

"There are, over two hundred pages here… we are working as quickly as we can. What has Marshall found?" Jack turned the attention away from him.

Kendall shook his head and squeezed his brow with his thumb and pointer finger… the headache that was his job was getting to him. "Nothing yet… he is decoding the information on the disk that Cuvee decoded from the Rambaldi pages and I have no idea about the Derevko disks." He picked up the phone and dialed a couple of numbers. "Flinkman, get in here." He slammed the phone back on the receiver.

Marshall flew through the door minutes later, obviously stressed out and attempted to adjust his tie and tuck his shirt back in, to look presentable.

"What have you found on the disks I gave you from Derevko's file?" Kendall loomed over the small man. Marshall looked uncomfortably around the room and gulped.

"I… a nothing yet, sir. I mean… I've been looking at it… but the disks are heavily encoded. I've never seen anything like it before and I've seen a lot. What ever is on these disks, someone went to a lot of work to protect them." Marshall turned his gaze away from Kendall's angered face and found Sydney. She smiled at him knowing how uncomfortable he was. "Hi Syd…" He smiled in return, "I heard about your mother being a Romanov… and your grandmother was Anastasia… so cool. That means you're a Royal too… like a princess or an empress… maybe?" He pondered the thought and then smiled, "Really cool."

"We don't know that for sure, Marshall." Sydney was suddenly nervous with the concept she hadn't yet thought about, if her mother was royalty, what did that make her?

"Well you'll always be a princess to me." Marshall smiled back before realizing what he'd just said. Embarrassed he turned his attention towards the floor.

"Keep working on those disks and tell me immediately when you've cracked them. And find out whatever you can on the Romanovs." Kendall turned his attention back to Vaughn, Sydney and Jack still sitting at the table. "If Derevko really is a Romanov, I want to know exactly what we're dealing with and how this all fits into her organization."

Marshall continued to stand there until he noticed Kendall looking at him, wondering why he wasn't moving. "Oh, right the disks… I'll get right on that." He said quickly and sped out the door.

Kendall shook his head and followed.

* * *

Hours later, Sydney stifled a yawn and Jack took notice of how tired she looked.

"It's late Sydney, you have had a busy week. Go home, get some rest." Jack's tone was on the border between ordering and caring.

"Dad…" Sydney began to protest but gave in, remembering that she and Vaughn were supposed to have dinner and talk about their 'vacation.' "Ok. You too."

Jack nodded giving in as well, that he too should wrap up for the evening.

"Goodnight Dad." Sydney smiled softly at him over her shoulder as she and Vaughn left the conference room, leaving Jack sitting there alone.

He sighed, closing the file in front of him, he doubted he would get much rest. Just like Sydney, this file only served to raise more questions for him. Jack knew he would spend the night lying awake, re-analyzing his entire life with 'Laura' and Irina, wondering how this new information fit into the picture. He opened the file to the picture he took of Irina with Sydney… wondering if he would ever learn the entire truth, if she would ever tell them… wondering if he could ever believe her… wondering if she was even alive.

A week had passed since the mission… since he shot her. He saw the look in her eyes when she realized it had been him that fired the shot. When Sydney had shot Irina, it was in the arm, a warning of 'I could kill you if I wanted' but let her escape. Jack's shot had not been intended as a warning, it had been a shot to kill. 'Had he succeeded?' The thought sent shivers down his spine glancing back to the photo.


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): ****_The Saddest Song I've Got _****by Annie Lennox****_, Ain't No Sunshine_**** by Bill Withers****_, Always _****by Saliva****_._**

* * *

FIVE

o

"Rina! What are you doing?" Katya scolded as she rushed to her sister's side seeing the fresh blood staining the front of Irina's bandages.

Irina was standing in front of the mirror, trying to get dressed but without the use of her hand the task proved to be more difficult then she thought. The blood seeping through the bandage on her chest, was a testament to the struggle she put up to do it herself. "Katya, I have to get dressed. I can't go to the clinic in my nightgown." She continued to fumble with the shirt stuck on one of the pins sticking out of her hand. "I'll have to get used to this one-hand thing." She smiled trying to break her sister's grimacing face.

"Why didn't you ask me to help you?" Katya sighed frustrated looking over the bandage. Irina crinkled her eyebrow at the question as her only response. "Never mind," Katya shook her head realizing what a stupid question that was to ask; her sister hated asking for help, she was too stubborn. "Sit down, Stubborn." She directed Irina to the edge of the bed, Irina complied too tired to argue and she knew she needed help. Katya retrieved a fresh package of gauze pads and bandages, kneeled down in front of Irina and set to work to repair the damage her sister had done to herself while dressing. "You have to be more careful," She looked up, meeting Irina's eyes, "You tore a couple stitches and that will only lead to infection… and an ugly scar."

"Yes, wouldn't want another ugly scar." Irina laughed softly in a mocking tone then grabbed her side grimacing in pain. "Ooo… don't make me laugh." She smiled lightly to her sister.

"Are you sure you're up for this?" Katya asked as she finished buttoning Irina's shirt.

"Yes! I can't stand to be in this room or that bed any longer. I have to get out for awhile, and besides… I can't wait any longer to see the baby." Irina gently rested her hand on her abdomen, smiling. "Let's go."

"Looks like you're healing well." Alexei smiled as he finished listening to Irina's lungs. "What are these scars from?" He asked pointing to three, moon shaped scars on Irina's chest. "They're not what I think they are from are they?" He narrowed his eyes at her, wondering if she hadn't told him about another previous episode that required them to start her heart again.

"I had a bug." Irina smiled trying to pass off the burn scars the electric paddles had left, as nothing. "He forgot to use gel." Irina remembered the mad dash in Germany to loose the tracker signal.

Alexei shook his head, not surprised by anything she told him anymore. Irina sat nervously on the edge of the examining table. She had always disliked the doctor's office, well not always…only since Kashmir.

"Your sister is taking good care of you." Alexei smiled and glanced back at Katya occupying a small chair in the corner of the room.

"Yes, she is." Irina smiled at her sister. "And patient… as I am not the easiest person to deal with."

"Ready to have a look at your baby?" Alexei pulled the sonogram machine closer to the examining table. Irina nodded, feeling nervous and afraid to speak. He helped her to lie back on the table. "I won't forget the gel." He smiled teasing her a little while squirting the green gel on her abdomen, careful of the stitches there.

Irina looked down at her belly and shook her head. Now that she knew she was pregnant she could see the little mound that had slowly formed over the last four and a half months without her aware; she'd been too distracted to notice. She had been late showing with Sydney too. Her thoughts suddenly jolted by a loud washing-machine noise, she glanced quickly at the monitor. The sound was fast and she knew instantly what she was listening to… her baby's heartbeat. Tears began to well up in her eyes, staring at the baby on the monitor.

"This one's active." Alexei smiled watching as the baby was apparently doing summersaults inside Irina. "Do you have an idea as to when you conceived?" He asked measuring the baby.

"Yes." Irina answered quietly thinking back to that night in Panama. "February 14th."

"Good strong heart-beat. Everything seems to be perfectly normal, a little small for your 18th week, but not surprising with all the activities you've been doing… halfway there now. I'm afraid this one's too active to see the sex. Now let's take a picture of the little one for you." The baby whirled around, as if on cue, planting the soles of its feet firmly against Irina's side. Two perfect little foot prints for the baby's first photo. "This is one of the best sonogram pictures I've ever seen." He handed the photo of the two little feet to Irina. "Now for the uncomfortable part." He pulled the giant amniocentesis needle from the tray. "Katya, come hold your sister's hand."

It wasn't a question; it was an order that both girls were going to follow whether they wanted to or not. Katya looked quickly to Irina to read her reaction but only found a smile. Irina gladly accepted the hand as the needle made its way into her abdomen; she really couldn't stand needles.

"Almost finished, there." Alexei smiled removing the needle and wiping the gel from Irina's belly. "I should have the results in a couple days, but try not to worry, everything looks beautiful… A little small, but we'll work on that, right, Your Highness? Sleep more, less activity, off your feet as much as possible… and NO exercising, My Dear!"

Irina continued to stare at the man, 'How was she supposed to run her business, and take care of Sloane, Cuvee and watch out for Sydney if she wasn't even supposed to leave the couch?'

"My Child, you must understand… this baby is going to have to play the catch-up game. You're very lucky that this little miracle is still with us. Now please-"

"Yes, of course, Alexei, whatever I have to do to keep my baby healthy." Irina smiled realizing she wasn't about to jeopardize her little miracle for anything.

"Next time maybe we can see the sex. Come November 15th, you should have a beautiful new baby."

'November 15th!' Irina's breath sucked in. The day 'Laura' had died. How ironic.

"I'll prescribe you some prenatal vitamins and bring them by the house when I come to take out your stitches. I want to keep an eye on this little one, make sure he or she is growing properly and that you are taking it easy. I think it would be a good idea to have another sonogram in a month or so." Alexei smiled reassuringly.

"Thank you." Irina smiled, sliding off the table with Katya's help.

The car ride home had been silent and Irina knew Katya had wanted to say something, but wasn't. "What?" Irina finally asked unable to take the awkward silence any longer.

"I was just wondering how you planned on running the organization, pregnant… When you are practically on bed rest. Don't you think that's going to be a bit difficult… and dangerous when people learn about the baby? Especially if this man Sloane and Cuvee are still after you to fulfill this Rambaldi Prophecy?" Katya asked eyeing Irina's stomach once again and the photo in her hand.

Irina once again covered her abdomen with her hand protectively. "I don't know yet." She said quietly, looking out the window. "I have to talk to Jack… I have to tell him."

***The Saddest Song I've Got***

"Are you insane?" Katya gasped astonished, "He just tried to kill you! And you want to tell him your pregnant with his baby?"

"He was protecting Sydney." Irina turned her gaze back to her sister. "And he deserves to know the truth."

"The truth? What truth? Who you really are? That you're carrying his baby? That you still love him? Have always loved him?" Katya was fuming and scared for her sister.

Irina had not been expecting her sister to say that but it was the truth. "All of it." She sighed as a tear made its way down her cheek.

"And what if he doesn't want to hear it? What if he doesn't believe you? And if he does, what if he decides he can't forgive you? Takes the baby and puts you back in prison or worse has you executed?" Katya's eyes were filling with tears at the thought. She'd just gotten Irina back and was terrified to lose her again.

"I don't think Jack would do that-"

"You don't think?" Katya cut her off, unable to believe what she was hearing from her sister, "Irina, he set you up and almost had you executed once before… he just shot you! You've lied to him about everything, destroyed his trust in you! What makes you think he won't?"

"I haven't lied to him about everything!" Irina was getting upset, she knew her sister was making valid points but she didn't want to hear them.

"Right..." Katya exaggerated the word and sighed seeing how upset Irina was getting and feeling her own angst about the situation, "But he doesn't know that? Does he?"

"I have to take the chance." Irina wiped the tears from her cheek.

"Oh, take the chance… You mean like last time you, 'took the chance?" Katya was furious now and Irina's eye's flashed with pain. "Look at what happened then. Are you willing to take that chance again?"

Irina remained silent and turned her attention back to the window, her tears continuing to fall in the thick silence between them. And there it was, the reason she'd been estranged from her sister for so long...

When the silence continued for several minutes, Katya began feeling guilty about what she had said.

"I'm sorry." Irina finally spoke so softly it was barely above a whisper, her eye's still focused on the window.

"No… I'm sorry." Katya reached across the car and took hold of Irina's hand. Irina looked at their joined hands and then at her sister. "I shouldn't have said that. I forgave you long ago." Irina's surprise was evident and Katya continued. "I know you were faced with an impossible choice… it just took me a long time to see it that way." She smiled a small smile at Irina and wiped away a tear of her own. "Besides, Mama forgave you…"

Irina grabbed her sister, pulling her into a tight embrace sobbing. When they both had a good cry, Katya pulled back to wipe the remaining tears on Irina's cheeks.

"Thank you." Irina smiled and gave her sister's hand a squeeze. The car slowed as two enormous iron gates opened to the driveway. "The house looks amazing." Irina smiled as they approached the beautiful yellow giant that they had called home and the surrounding grounds.

"The restoration has been going well," Katya joined her looking out the window. "Slow process though, restoring all two hundred rooms. You did the right thing, Rina, wanting to restore it… and open it up for the public."

"It's our history… but it's our people's history too, and I didn't want it fading into the background forgotten. Remember how Mama's face used to light up when she would talk about her childhood here?" Irina smiled at her sister.

"She missed this place so much. Remember playing hide-n-seek? The games would last hours as I never knew where you were hiding." Katya laughed at the memory, "We had to limit the hiding rooms after I got lost, remember!?"

"Yes, I remember." Irina closed her eyes, thinking about her childhood for the first time in a long time.

They would sneak into the palace once a month with their mother. Irina could still see the image of her mother sitting alone in the garden, lost in another time…another world. She and Katya would play hide-n-seek for hours as their mother sat out there.

Every time, before they left…they would walk to her mother's old room…left exactly as is had the day she left it for the last time with her family. The furniture had been covered in plastic, which her mother would always remove. She remembered sitting on the giant four-post bed listening to the music- box Faberge egg…her mother closing her eyes, humming along to the tune. It had been 'a gift' she said, from her Papa. And when it was finished…she would always put it back…cover the furniture again and leave.

"It was such a scary place then…all dusty, and broken. Every time we would come here, I thought we were going to see ghosts." Katya snapped Irina from her daydream.

Helping her out of the car, both stopping to take a long gaze at the house in front of them, looking immaculate with a fresh coat of yellow paint with white trim, the windows replaced, the shrubs trimmed and flowers in full bloom in the garden.

"Mama would be so proud of you. This was always her favorite palace." Katya squeezed Irina's hand and they walked inside.

"So what are you going to do about Jack?" Katya hedged the subject once again, feeling as though some air had been cleared between the two. "And the organization?"

Irina attempted to take a deep breath, re-adjusting the sling around her neck, the weight of her arm suddenly feeling very heavy, "I'm going to need your help."

* * *

-Los Angeles, CA-

***Ain't No Sunshine***

Jack pulled slowly into the familiar driveway. It was late and all the neighbors were already in bed. Four days had passed and the decoding was going slowly. Jack put his car in park and sat in his car looking at the house in front of him.

He remembered the first time she saw the beautiful two-story home, she had fallen in love with it…insisting it was 'the perfect home to raise their children in.' They had just moved to California from D.C. He had been transferred to the Los Angeles branch and she'd accepted a job teaching at UCLA. This had been the first, and only house they looked at. She loved everything about it, 'The American Dream…' she'd said.

A gorgeous two-story white house, dark blue shutters, a beautiful porch with a wooden swing on one end, a brick-laid drive-way and walk, nice big yard and white picket fence. He loved this house as much as she did but put up a protest, enjoying her pleading and excitement about 'convincing' him to close the deal.

He remembered bringing Sydney home from the hospital… The nights he and 'Laura' would sit in the swing after putting their little girl to sleep, just enjoying the summer breeze, it was all a lie…

Jack sighed and climbed out the car, grabbed his briefcase, slung his jacket over his shoulder and ascended the steps of the porch, the motion-sensor lights kicking in. He fumbled with his keys for moment, cursing out loud, frustrated.

He finally managed to get the door open, entered the dark house and shut the door. He didn't bother turning on the lights, he never did, dropped his briefcase and jacket on the couch as he passed, and made his way to the kitchen undoing his tie and shirt buttons as he went.

"Damn it!" He cursed into the darkness as he stubbed his toe on the coffee table.

"You never learned to turn the lights on." Came a familiar voice from the darkness.

The lamp in the corner suddenly clicked on and Jack turned, "Irina."

***Always ***

Jack's eyes still adjusting to the light, "You're alive." He breathed out surprised yet, relieved, then tensed, watching her walk to the chair near the fireplace and sit.

She was wearing a black sleeveless V-neck shirt, a sheer on white three-quarters length skirt with a delicate black design weaving across it, Spanish ruffles flowed at the hemline…the slit in the front exposing a dangerous amount of skin as she sat, causing Jack to swallow hard, staring as she crossed her legs, 'She has great legs.'

He was also, mesmerized by the bandage on her chest, that he'd just been exposed to him when she moved and the sling around her neck.

"Barely…though I know you must be disappointed." Irina immediately regretted it… This was not where she wanted the conversation to be going…she didn't come all this way to pick a fight.

Jack remained silent, waiting for her to speak again, his guilt at shooting her and his anger for all her lies and betrayals raging war with each other inside him. He wanted to kiss her and strangle her at the same time.

"How's Sydney?" She asked truly concerned about her daughter's well being.

Jack was irritated by her concern for their daughter when she was the one causing the most damage. His icy stare suddenly fleeting to her hand when she moved to re-adjust the sling and he saw the damage to her hand…the damage she had saved Sydney from…and by the looks of the pins he could see sticking out of it everywhere…a terrible damage.

Irina was waiting for his answer and he saw in her eyes she was truly worried about their daughter.

"She's fine." He said softly with no emotion, not wanting to give her too much information…wanting to hold it hostage as she had done with keeping so many things from him. Irina could see the war raging inside him.

"How's your hand?" Jack looked at her hand and was sincerely concerned though he would never show it on the outside.

Irina glanced down at her badly damaged hand, smiling, touched that Jack would even ask…considering he did try to kill her.

"I don't think I'll ever play the piano again." She smiled sadly, hoping that wasn't going to be true.

"Everything looks exactly like I remember it." Irina smiled looking around the room that had some new pieces of furniture but placed in the same spots; nervous about how to approach the reason she was there.

"I had to keep up the illusion for Sydney. After your 'death' I wanted to keep things the same for her. Even after I learned of your betrayal…I saw no point in destroying our child even more by telling her the truth…you were dead, or so we all thought. So, I let Sydney go on believing you had died an honorable woman who loved her, which she believed and idolized you…up until last year when she finally learned the truth… that her mother was a traitor, a KGB spy and terrorist who was still alive." Jack spat at her angrily.

Irina had a hard time keeping her emotions under control and blinked back tears, remembering why she was there. 'She would not cry in front of Jack, she wouldn't let him get to her.'

"What are you doing here, Irina?" He shifted his weight staring heavily into her eyes. "You must be out of your mind to step-foot inside this country again with a Shoot To Kill order on you, no less into the home of a CIA operative while you're obviously still recovering and in no shape to defend yourself."

She remained silent for moment refusing to meet his gaze.

"I didn't come here to fight. We need to talk…" She began softly, rising from the chair.

The grimace of pain, not going unnoticed by Jack, "About what? I don't have anything to say to you other then, 'you're under arrest."

Irina disregarded his last statement still searching for a way to explain herself.

"But I have so much I need to say to you…to explain to you." She finally met his gaze, desperate to see something beside contempt for her there.

Jack couldn't bear to look her in the eye anymore, not willing to give her what he knew she was searching for.

"Everything you've ever said, every move you've made…everything…has been a lie. You honestly think I would trust any explanation you would give?!"

"Not everything, Jack." Irina protested, her hand immediately going to her stomach, covering the baby. "I…I'd hoped that you'd see that in Panama. 'See' my intentions."

Jack's eyes went wild with fury. "Panama!" He boomed and then laughed. "All I saw you do in Panama was use yourself as a whore again to get what you want and then escape into the waiting arms of Arvin Sloane!"

Irina's hurt was masked the anger she felt rising within her. She had expected Jack to be angry with her about her actions, and normally she could deal with it…letting it wash over her…but she was pregnant…and had a hard time keeping her emotions under control. She remained silent as Jack rolled on with his tirade.

"The only thing you proved to me once again in Panama, was that I was right to not trust you! I knew from the moment you turned yourself in…that you had a hidden agenda and we'd all be victim too it again. Sydney couldn't help herself…she'd wanted 'her' mother her entire life, wanted that love…and there you were, claiming you'd changed…that you were sorry for your mistakes and wanted to make it right with her. As the months went by and she became more attached to you, I hoped, for her sake, that I was wrong. And I too, began to believe in your new found sincerity after you helped me with Ariana Kane, which I'm sure now was just another manipulation you planned for to build my trust so I would convince Kendall to let you out. To help 'save' her from Sloane and a life built on lies!"

Irina had enough and interrupted. "Jack, I did want to save her from Sloane and give her a life outside the CIA…I never wanted to hurt Sydney, to betray her…"

"Just me right!" Jack took a step-forward, yelling in her face.

"No! If you'd just shut-up for a minute you idiot and listen, let me explain."

"Shut-Up?" He yelled inching closer to her face; unnerved she had the audacity to tell 'him' to 'shut-up.'

"Yes, shut-up and listen!" She yelled back.

Jack's nostrils began to flare.

"Yes, you were right!" She shouted breathing heavily.

Jack stunned by her admission remained silent.

"Ok are you happy…you were right! I did give myself to the CIA as part of a perfect plan to take down SD-6 and the Alliance, and gain access to CIA Intel…but the plan changed Jack...I changed. Being near Sydney again…near you, I began doubting what I was doing… That is why I considered taking you up on your offer of the illusion of freedom…"

"But you didn't!" He yelled again.

"But I thought about it! But decided I had worked for too many years to find the truth about Rambaldi…I was too close to it now and I was not going to confuse myself into giving it all up on the delusion of family... I had to stay the course, follow the plan. But Jack…in Panama…that…being with you…" She tried to look him in the eye but he wouldn't, "wasn't part of the plan."

"Ah, but then when the opportunity presented itself…you decided 'why not seize the moment, right?' You had deceived me into bed so many times before when we were married, why not give it a go one more time just to have a good laugh that you could still 'get' me."

"No!" Irina whispered, shaking her head…'This was not going well at all.'

"Well guess what, Irina? The last laugh was on you! 'I' manipulated you and you took the bait."

Seeing the confusion rapidly spreading across her face Jack continued,

"I saw your intentions and I decided to manipulate you at your own game…to use you…like you used me all those years."

Irina could hardly breath.

Jack knew he was lying about everything he'd just said but loved the defeated look on Irina's face at the thought he had finally gotten her and he didn't want to stop.

Irina, in the meantime, could hardly breathe, not just because of the horrible things that Jack was saying to her…but because she'd also just felt their baby kick for the first time.

"I bet you were surprised to find the little present I left you with."

Irina could think of two he'd left her with actually, her hand once again protectively going over her stomach at the little person who was making their presence known… Apparently just as disturbed by their father's harsh words as Mommy, but Irina said nothing.

"I never trusted you for a second…only hoped you'd had some shred of a conscience where Sydney was concerned but you didn't…Your only concern, as always for yourself…never thinking about anyone else. I tried to protect her from you but I failed. She was just another pawn in your sick and twisted game. In the end you couldn't resist the temptation and went running into the arms of Arvin Sloane…the 'Royal Russian Whore' strikes again."

~SMACK~

Jack felt the tingling sensations immediately as Irina's hand collided with his face. Wiping the blood from his lip with the back of his hand, he'd realized he'd gone too far. He stood there looking at the blood on his hand afraid to look at Irina, who was perfectly still…silent…'Deadly silent.' Jack thought, waiting for the rest of her wrath. There was none.

"I was wrong to come here. I'm sorry…" Quietly tucking the hair behind her ear, Irina stepped away from Jack, realizing that there would never be an absolution for her… He would never be able to get past her betrayal and forgive her, never be able to see her as anything but a lying 'whore,' certainly never be able to…love her.

Jack looked up immediately, not expecting her to say that, nor was he expecting to see the steady stream of tears rolling down her cheeks.

Seeing Jack's face soften at her appearance she quickly wiped the tears away, shoving her feelings for him back to the place she had buried them long ago…

"Irina…" Jack began, watching as she transformed from 'Irina' into 'The Man,' fear immediately taking over as he watched her reach inside her sling and pull out a gun, aiming it directly at him.

"I can't have you putting me back in that glass cell to await my execution… Goodbye, Jack." She smiled and pulled the trigger.

Jack looked at his chest stunned, and back at Irina who was now very blurry … "Irina…" He breathed feeling his legs begin to give out underneath him and he wobbled.

Irina reached out to him with her good arm and helped him slide gently to the floor.

"Sleep well, Jack," Was the last thing he heard before slipping into unconsciousness.

Irina walked out the back door and to the waiting car in the alley. She climbed into the Mercedes and immediately pulled the gun from her sling, putting it in the glove compartment.

"So… I take it things didn't go well." Katya stated seeing a void of any emotion on Irina's face, something that was never good.

"No." Irina sighed looking at the house one last time as they drove into the darkness.

"Did you tell him?"

"No…He never gave me the chance…" She continued to gaze out the window, "He will never give me the chance." Irina resigned softly, knowing there would never be an absolution. "He will never forgive me."


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat):** **_Why _****by Annie Lennox****_, Shut-Up _****by The Black Eyed Peas****_, For Your Precious Love_**** by Jerry Butler****_._**

* * *

SIX

o

Jack awoke groggy, his neck killing him. Slowly he opened his eyes and realized he was looking at the legs of the coffee table.

Immediately alarmed, he tried to sit up…a wave of dizziness hitting him and a sharp pain in his chest. He looked down and saw a blue feather…slowly he pulled it from his chest. "A tranquilizer dart," He sighed placing it on the coffee table. "I should have known."

The sun was shining brightly and he knew he was going to be late for work unless he got up and got ready. Slowly he pulled himself up and looked around the room. The lamp in the corner still on… He'd really blown it. She had been here, in his living room…proclaiming to be there to give him the 'truth' he'd spent twenty-one years trying to understand…and he shut her down…not wanting to hear her excuses… his need to belittle her after all the pain she caused taking precedent.

"Damn it!" He scolded himself climbing the stairs to his room to shower and change. He should have been able to control his emotions, not let her get to him. Whatever she had wanted to say, must have been important for her to risk coming back to the US…For coming to him after he'd just shot her. 'Why had he been so stupid? Why didn't he just 'shut-up' and listen to her?'

He took off his clothes and jumped in the shower, letting the water wash over him as he thought about the events of this previous night.

***Why***

Jack heard his radio alarm clock come on and stood motionless listening to the words of Annie Lennox's song, "Why?"

They seemed to be speaking directly to him.

_'How many times to do I have to try tell you,_

_That I'm sorry for the things I've done…_

_But when I start to try to tell you,_

_That's when you have to tell me,_

_'Hey, this kind of trouble's only just begun.'_

_I tell myself too many times,_

_'Why don't you ever learn to keep your big mouth shut?'_

_That's why it hurts so bad to hear the words_

_That keep on falling from your mouth…_

_Falling from your mouth,_

_Falling from your mouth,_

_Tell me why…_

_Tell me why…_

_I may be mad._

_I may be blind._

_I may be viciously unkind,_

_But I can still read what you're thinking…'_

The words could have come directly from Irina's mouth; if only he would 'shut-up' and listen. The words that fell from his mouth had been incredibly hurtful… that was evident from her response. Not the slap, but the tears. Telling her the night they spent together in Panama was out of revenge, so he could use her. Nothing could be further from the truth and he could see the message she was trying to convey to him that night with her eyes; that it meant something for her too, that it was not a manipulation… He'd actually called her a 'whore' not once, but twice…

Jack closed his eyes and sighed heavily. He grabbed the towel from the rack, wrapped it around his body, and strode across the room to shut off the radio. He couldn't listen to that song anymore.

He threw on some clothes, and headed down the stairs. He was going to have some explaining to do when he got to work, first why he was late and second, why he didn't listen to her offer some insight into her life or confront her about any of the information they currently were investigating, he certainly couldn't tell them anything about their fight about Panama.

Jack's head began to pound as he started his car. He didn't want to think anymore about last night and how foolish he'd been, or the fact that Irina could still get to him so. He backed out of the driveway and flipped on the radio, needing a distraction.

***Shut Up***

Rick Deez had just finished talking and a new song began to play… a woman's voice suddenly crooned,

_"Shut-up! Just shut-up shut-up!_

_Shut-up! Just shut-up shut-up!_

_Shut-up! Just shut-up shut-up!_

_Shut it up! Just shut-up shut-up..."_

'What the hell?' Jack listened to the words wondering about the karma of this morning's music and their references to last night… 'I'm just being paranoid.' Jack pressed scan on his radio and waited for it to find another station, his mind flashing back to Irina screaming for him to 'shut-up' last night; his thoughts, were interrupted by two guys named Ricco and Mambo talking about the Black Eyed Peas, and the most requested song of the week. 'Finally.' Jacked sighed pulling onto the 101 Freeway.

_"Shut-up! Just shut-up shut-up!"_

'Oh hell no!' Jack violently jammed the Off button on the radio. "This is a conspiracy!" He screamed out loud causing the other drivers in the traffic-jam to wonder about the crazy man screaming in his car.

"Dad!" Sydney breathed a sigh of relief when she saw Jack entering Ops, forty-five minutes late. "I was just about to call you." She, Weiss, and Vaughn met him in his office. "You are never late? What happened?"

Jack didn't have time to answer before Kendall arrived. "Where the hell have you been Jack?"

Jack was getting frustrated. "If you give me a minute, I'll explain." He sighed setting his briefcase on the desk, looking up to meet Sydney's eyes. "Your mother is alive… she was waiting for me when I got home last night."

Sydney surprised and then immediately concerned. "Mom was at the house? Dad, are you ok?" She started scanning her father's body for any sign of damage her mother might have inflicted.

"Yes… I'm fine."

"Where the hell is Derevko and why didn't you call to alert us she was there?" Kendall fumed.

"I couldn't exactly pick up the phone to call you when she was standing in front of me. You really think she would just stand there waiting for us to arrest her? This is Irina Derevko we're talking about; she came prepared! She shot me with a tranquilizer dart. I woke up on the floor this morning."

"You were lucky with the tranquilizer dart, she knocked me out with her elbow and electrocuted me with a stun gun." Sydney sighed frustrated and already upset with her mother.

"Only because she was in no condition to put up a fight."

Sydney's scorn for her mother immediately turned to concern at her father's words.

Jack saw her reaction and quickly explained. "She was pretty slow moving, still healing I presume from her injuries…and her arm was in a sling." He said softly knowing Sydney would feel guilty about that.

"How bad was it?" Her eyes were full of sadness thinking about that night and how her mother had saved her from being stabbed.

"It didn't look good from what I saw. She was wearing an external fixture with several metal pins jutting out of her hand. The rest was wrapped in bandages. She didn't sound optimistic about it, saying she'd 'never play the piano again." He didn't want to be so blunt with Sydney about the injuries Irina sustained helping her, but Sydney had constantly reminded him that she didn't want to be treated with 'kid-gloves,' so he was giving her the truth.

"Why the hell didn't you subdue her then if she was in no condition to fight?" Kendall was angry.

"I really didn't think that was a wise move. Like cornering an injured tiger…the outcome no doubt would have left me with permanent damage!"

Kendall realized he probably wouldn't have tried anything in the situation either, knowing how dangerous Irina Derevko could be. "Why was she here? What did she want?"

"She said she wanted to talk… wanted to explain."

"About what?" Sydney was always intrigued by her parents' interactions. "What did she say? Did you tell her about the file?"

"We never got to that." Jack swallowed hard.

"Well what was so important to her that she would risk everything to come back and talk to you?" Kendall was just as curious by this woman's actions.

"I don't know… we didn't get to that either."

"Then what the hell did you two talk about?"

"She started talking about Panama and wanting to save Sydney from Sloane… explaining her actions and reasons for her betrayal," Jack didn't lie, just omitted a great majority of the details. "I lost my temper. We fought. She shot me. That's it."

"That's it?" Kendall repeated skeptically, knowing there was more to this story then Jack was letting on.

"That's it." Jack repeated.

Sydney sensing the tension between her father and Kendall chose to bring up the positive side of this encounter.

"Well at least we know she's alive now. Marshall!" She called out spotting him. He immediately smiled at Sydney and joined the group. "How's it going with the disks?"

"Not well unfortunately… I've never seen anything like it. I've tried every single KGB code ever used on case files and none of them are working. Whoever designed this code is brilliant." He smiled completely impressed with the genius behind his troubles. Seeing his answer was not one they were hoping for, nor sharing his enthusiasm over the 'genius' of the code he quickly added, "I will break eventually, its just taking time." Realizing he did have something that might make them happier about the situation, "One minute!" He turned and bolted to his desk returning moments later with a manila folder. "I did the research you asked for on Anastasia Romanov. Let me just say, 'WOW!' She was gorgeous." He opened the file leafing through the pages looking for something in particular. "Your mother looks just like her…it's easy to see where you get your looks from and why you're so beautiful." He smiled handing Sydney a photo he'd printed off the Internet. Seeing Jack's reaction, "Oh… not that your not beautiful, sir… It's just that your wife or ex-wife and daughter are just so hot…t hat didn't come out right, I mean… I just meant that-"

"Marshall." Jack silenced the young babbling man before he went on telling Jack how 'beautiful' he was.

"Wow… she really does look like Mom." Sydney sighed shaking her head in disbelief.

The photo showed a very young, very beautiful Anastasia posing for an official looking portrait of some kind. Her long dark-brown hair pulled up, a crown adorning her head. Her dress, a gorgeous off the shoulder baby-blue satin, a white sash with official looking medals and seals across her front.

Jack too marveled at just how much Irina looked like the woman in the photo, and Sydney too…though not as much…she did manage to get 'some' of his looks.

Weiss whistled his sign of approval looking at the photo and earned a sharp glare from Kendall.

"This was her last official portrait before the family was murdered…It was commemorating her seventeenth birthday. And look…" Marshall said eagerly pointing to the photograph, "The earrings your mother gave you."

Anastasia was indeed wearing the earrings.

"It still doesn't disprove the theory Mom stole them." Sydney added, still trying to find some way out of the fact that her mother was royalty in anyway.

"Sydney." Vaughn admonished her, "You've got to be kidding me. She looks just like your mother. I don't want to believe it either but come on…"

"Yes, I will admit they do look very similar but I just can't wrap my brain around all this yet. Like, how is it possible my mother is her daughter if this woman was murdered in Siberia in 1918?"

"The myth might be based on reality… maybe she did escape."

"Vaughn, they found Anastasia's bones in 1998, near the area where the rest of the Romanov family's bodies were buried before they moved them to the Royal cemetery in St. Petersburg!"

"I know, it doesn't make any sense but maybe…the bones were placed there later…I mean, why didn't they find them when they found the other bodies?"

"I don't know." She sighed. "What else did you find out Marshall?"

"Well, your grandmother… I mean Anastasia… was very close to her father Tsar Nicholas, she was the youngest of the daughters. From the time she was very little, she used to write him letters when he would go away on business. She also loved photography and her father bought her a Kodak camera, it was said she would take pictures of any and everything. She was also very close with her brother Alexei, who was heir to the throne but suffered from Hemophilia, and was often too sick to leave the palace." he paused looking at the baffled faces.

"Oh, and her favorite palace was Alexander…just outside St. Petersburg. She loved all the rooms and secret passageways… especially the garden. I found quite a few photographs of her playing there when she was little." He handed Sydney another stack of printed photos. "Oh… and Syd, I did some checking on the earrings your mother gave you… I mean checked into the appraisal and all if they really are the real thing… you know… just curious to see what they might be worth… you might want to consider keeping them in a safe place." He raised his eyebrow nodding his head.

"How much?" Jack interrupted Marshall's long head bobbing session.

"Ahh… at that combined weight, plus the history involved, part of the Imperial Jewels… $12.3 million." He coughed out.

"$12.3 million dollars!" Sydney gasped.

Weiss stood transfixed on the photograph and the earrings.

"Wow…my mother never gave me any gift like that… I wish I had your mother." Seeing Jack's eye's narrow, "well not the whole KGB, terrorist, shooting you thing, part, person..."

"I've been carrying them around in my pocket… in case she tried to send another message." Reaching inside her jacket revealing the earrings she'd been keeping there.

"I wouldn't go around telling to many people that, Sydney, maybe you should put them in a safety deposit box for now." Jack warned her.

"But Dad, what if Mom tries to contact me? I can take care of myself…no one is going to get these away from me." She said adamantly, putting the earrings back in her jacket.

"Alright people, show and tell is over. Get back to work." Kendall barked and they all retreated to their designated workstations.

* * *

Jack, Sydney, and Vaughn to the conference room to continue working on decoding Irina's file…and Marshall and Weiss back to Tech. Ops to continue trying to crack the code on the disks.

"This must have been her handler." Vaughn sighed leafing through the pages with photos showing Irina meeting with a man at various places over the years, most of them hotels…just like she'd told Jack to help him with the Ariana Kane investigation. The thought of Irina meeting the man in a hotel made Jack sick.

"Yes, she told me that she used to meet with him in his hotel room."

Jack kept his eyes on the document he was decoding, not wanting to see his daughter and Vaughn's faces. Sydney and Vaughn shared a puzzling look, wondering why Irina would tell him something like that…and how Jack could seem so blasé about it. "She told me when she was helping me with the Ariana Kane investigation. It's how we figured out she was the one framing me."

Not wanting to discuss Irina's bedroom encounters any further, they all got lost in their documents.

"I wonder who this guy is?" Sydney asked showing them photos of Irina with a man who's back was turned to the camera, never giving them a full view of his face.

"I don't know, but here, on the bottom it has your mother's name and Mikhail Vontonavich October 1st 1970." Vaughn read out loud, inspecting one of the photos.

The date's significance not lost to them. October 1st was the day they met. They shared a small smile that had Jack wondering but Vaughn quickly continued.

"Whatever he is saying must be funny, she's laughing. She doesn't look very old, what fifteen in 1970? And where is this park? That bench looks familiar."

'Fifteen!' Jack's brain was screaming at her impossibly young age and the fact he was so blind to it, meeting her a year later. She certainly didn't look or act, like a sixteen year old. He picked up one of the photographs, instantly jealous of the attention Irina was giving the young man. He noticed the smile on Irina's face, the way it lit her eyes making them sparkle…the way she was touching his arm, how close they'd been sitting, face to face on the bench, "She was in love with him, or at least pretending to be." Jack announced rather calmly, surprising Sydney and Vaughn once again. They decided it best not to ask Jack how he knew that, suspecting he was probably an expert in that area of Derevko's life… love and deception. "Maybe he was her first assignment or a practice run of sorts." The sarcasm dripping with his every word, "You know, before she took the big plunge moving to America to dupe me."

"Dad…" Sydney said calmly, Jack suddenly rising from his seat, trying to control his anger.

"I need a cup of coffee." He stormed out the door.

"This has to be so insane for him." Vaughn sighed, looking at the document with the photograph. "Finding out the woman you loved, made a life with… was someone else entirely."

He paused momentarily, apprehensive to continue, " I somehow got the feeling that he wasn't telling us everything that happened last night with your mother; did you get that feeling too? Like he was holding something back. I got that feeling about their mission in Panama too, like we don't know everything that happened there either."

"Yeah," she sighed knowing Vaughn was right, her father probably keeping the truth from them as well. "I know… his answer this morning was just like the Santa Claus question when I was little...short, no details or enthusiasm in his answer… dead giveaway he was lying."

"So why didn't… you say something if you thought he was lying?" Vaughn almost shouted then used a softer tone trying to keep his voice down.

"Vaughn, my father may be a CIA agent and my mother, the terrorist he is supposed to be hunting down…but they're are still my parents! And quizzing my father on his relationship and conversations with her isn't going to do anything but build more barriers. He already thinks he has to protect me from her or any information about her. You saw his reaction to me wanting to work on this file. It's not black and white."

"I know," Vaughn took hold of her hand, frustrated at himself, knowing the turmoil Sydney was already in concerning her parents and he was just adding too it.

"I'm sorry, I know this is difficult for you."

"And for you too, we've been over this before."

Jack reappeared, three cups of coffee in hand. "Thought you might like some as well; looks to be another long night." He smiled at Sydney, trying to apologize for his outburst without actually doing so.

"Thanks." She smiled as he set the cups in front of her and Vaughn. Vaughn nodded his appreciation for the gesture and they set to work again.

Another hour or so passed and their work seemed to be going slowly…there was so much information to decode.

"I've found something." "Here it is." Vaughn and Sydney spoke at the same time.

"You go first." Vaughn prompted Sydney.

"The orders she received… to kill the CIA Officers, are here."

Jack and Sydney both felt a wave a pain for Vaughn as his face fell, taking the paper from Sydney.

"Does it say why?" he asked quietly scanning the page.

"No, not really…only that 'they' were becoming a risk and needed to be removed."

She spoke softly. "What did you find?"

Vaughn shook his head trying to clear the thoughts swimming there.

"It says your mother received her Extraction order on October 20th, 1981 for October 26th, 1981."

"But my mother didn't 'die,' until November 15th, that doesn't make any sense."

"Well, that's the thing…" Vaughn paused looking at Jack and Sydney, "It says she refused the orders."

"What?" Sydney grabbed the papers from Vaughn. "Why would she refuse to leave on the 26th but leave on the 15th instead?"

"It says she received a second set of orders on the 13th…can you think of anything in that time frame that would explain why your mother would refuse to leave on the 26th?"

"No… but I was really little and I don't remember much from that time frame." She said quietly looking at her father, the one responsible for the lapse in memories ala Project Christmas.

"I can't think of any reason she would either. I was out of town on a mission at the time. Maybe it just wasn't convenient for her." Jack still felt horrible for what he'd done to Sydney.

"I found something too. Your Mother was telling us the truth about being a prisoner in Kashmir. It says here that she was charged with being a suspected traitor and taken to the prison in Kashmir on November 27th, 1981 for unrestricted interrogation." Jack gulped now knowing why Irina had wanted to escape.

"Just days after she left us?"

While they were having a funeral and mourning her mother's death, Irina was being carted off to prison. "Does it say anything about how long she was kept there? Or any record of her time there… Does it say she escaped? She told us that is how she knew the sewer tunnels and landmine locations, so she could escape."

"It doesn't give details. It does say that on May 27th, 1982 she tried to escape with another prisoner. He made it, though is presumed dead as he was badly injured in the escape… Irina was caught and put in solitary for ten months."

"Ten months…" Sydney felt her heart strings tug, the daughter part of her wanted to say 'damn right, its what you deserve for leaving us,' but the agent part her knew what hell it must have been for her mother to spend ten months in solitary confinement.

Jack too had to admire Irina, at least for that… to survive that long and not lose your mind… well maybe she had lost it, he thought to himself, thinking about her life and the things she'd done.

It was also the first time he realized… he and Irina had been in solitary confinement at the same time… both suspected of betraying their countries, though he still wasn't clear as to why they thought she was. He was ready to kill himself after only two months in there… he had no idea how she made it ten.

"Does it say anything else?" Sydney's question brought him back from his thoughts.

Scanning the decoded information… he read, "It says following her time in solitary she spent another three months in 'reconditioning,' whatever the hell that means, and was released June 17th, 1983."

"Nineteen months total." Vaughn calculated the time Irina had been imprisoned. "No wonder she is psychotic,'" he said quietly, "after nineteen months of unrestricted torture." He wasn't sure he wouldn't be either.

Jack's mouth felt dry, agreeing with Vaughn assessment of Irina's mentality and the possible reasons for it.

"Does it say why they suspected her of being a traitor?" Vaughn asked the question they had all been curious about.

Jack scanned the page once again. "Refusal to comply with given orders on more then one occasion. Hiding physical evidence that would suggest her loyalties had changed in favor of the target and enemy country."

Jack's mind was reeling, trying to figure out what kind of orders Irina Derevko would refuse to, and what evidence she didn't provide them. "There's nothing else on the page about it."

"The man… she tried to escape with. Does it give his name?" Sydney asked, curious about the man who'd made it out when her mother hadn't. Jack hadn't thought about it but searched the document once again…

"Well this is interesting… it's the man from the photo in the park. Mikhail Vontonavich."

"This guy?" Sydney frantically searched the pile of photographs until she found one of the few, this mystery man was in. She focused intently on the photograph trying to make out anything that might be a clue as to who, this man was, and what he really meant to her mother…and how they ended up in prison together almost twelve years after this photo had been taken.

There was paper lying between them, wrapping paper Sydney concluded… must have been his birthday or something… that was it. He looked like any other guy from the back. Short brown hair, kind of thin, tall she could see even though he was sitting, his head at least two inches above her mother. He wore jeans, a dark blue dress shirt, the sleeves rolled to the elbows, a watch, a large silver ring on his right hand ring finger, and a brown leather jacket, lay draped across the back of the bench. Nothing that would scream 'clue!' "Probably just some guy she met in the KGB and dated and by freak coincidence, ran into him again in prison." Sydney sighed in frustration, getting nowhere. "Right, like anything with Mom is ever just a coincidence."

"Why don't we call it a day?" Jack sighed; frustrated, still mulling over the information they learned about Irina's life, 'The Never Ending Story.' "It's late and I want to go home."

The uncharacteristic move prompted Vaughn and Sydney to stop and take notice.

"Ok." Sydney gave in, packing up her papers and handing them to her father. "Goodnight, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Goodnight." He smiled.

"Dad, do you think Mom will come back to the house?" Sydney asked her father nervously.

"After what I said to her last night…I doubt it. Unless it's to kill me." Jack grabbed his stuff and quickly exited, "Goodnight."

"See… something else did happen last night that he's not talking about." Vaughn stood there watching Jack breeze through the Ops Center.

"Now I'm worried about him." Sydney turned away from the door to Vaughn, "What if she does come back to kill him?"

"Syd, your Dad is a big boy and as it was pointed out to me when I was worried your mother would try to kill you when she turned herself in… after she shot you… if Irina Derevko wants you dead…there is no question. She would have killed you in Barcelona or Taipei, and she would have killed your father last night if she wanted to…"

"Comforting. Thanks, Vaughn for pointing that out." Sydney replied sarcastically, then apologized quickly… not intending to take her frustrations about her mother on him. "I'm sorry… It's late and I don't want to think about this for the rest of the night, do you think you could occupy me." She gave him a devilish grin.

"Oh, I could think of a few ways." He opened the door, letting her leave first, whispering in her ear as they left.

"But I don't think it would be wise to discuss them here."

"Your place or mine?" She asked quickly.

"Yours."

With that they both rushed out the door.

* * *

Jack opened the door to the dark house, stepped inside and paused in the darkness…for the first time in a long time, he flipped the switch and the light came on. He smiled thinking back to Irina's comment about never 'learning' to turn on the lights.

It started when they were married, he'd come home late from work and not want to wake her by turning on the lights, so he'd cruise around the house in the dark. On more then one occasion, he'd scare the wits out of her by running into something, knocking it over. She'd yelled at him more then once, to turn on the lights and stop scaring her to death.

He dropped his briefcase on the sofa and looked to the chair where she sat just last night. He hated to admit it, but he wished she was there again…this time he'd hear her out, at least he'd like to believe he would. He undid his tie and shirt buttons as always and walked to the liquor cabinet.

He'd never drank vodka until he met 'Laura,' he'd quickly become a fan of both. She only drank Smirnoff and looking at the bottle in front of him now, it made more sense. Not only was it one the best vodkas, the bottle said it was the vodka of the 'Imperial House of Russia… until 1917', when the Royal family lost control of their country. Why had he never noticed that before? He still couldn't contemplate Irina belonging to that Royal family. What a ridiculous notion!

Sighing, he poured himself a glass and walked to a table near the wall, adorned with numerous photos of Sydney at various ages and even one of the entire 'family,' one he'd never bothered taking down once Sydney learned the truth. He carefully removed the photos and white linen covering the top and placed them aside.

Gently, he lifted the lid to a wave of memories. He glanced over the old records and found the one he was looking for, placed it on the turntable, and lifted the needle.

***For Your Precious Love***

Grabbing a photo album also tucked away inside, he walked to the chair Irina had occupied the night before and closed his eyes as the first notes of an old song he knew well filled the house.

It had been playing on the jukebox, at the restaurant in Georgetown, the night he proposed. He used to dance to this song, "For Your Precious Love," with his 'wife' late at night, on many occasions…mostly to just enjoy the closeness they shared from dancing. The last time he listened to this song was the night Laura died; he put it away for good when he found out it was all a lie.

Seeing the photos of their life together in Irina's KGB file had brought back a flood of memories he tried to forget about. The words of the song seemed to mock him now, taking on an entirely different meaning…

_'Your precious love means more to me_

_Then any love could ever be_

_For when I wanted you_

_I was so lonely and so blue_

_So that's what love will do_

_And darling,_

_I was so surprised_

_When I first realized_

_That you were fooling me…'_

Jack took a long sip of the vodka, preparing himself…wanting to be numb for what he was about to do. He slowly opened the album containing the photos of 'their' life.


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: This is an intense chapter full of deep FEELS! Music for this chapter (on repeat): ****_Da_**** Svidanya 'Red Army Choir' from The Hunt for the Red October Soundtrack , An****_ Angel Falls by Gabriel Yared_****, ****_Adagio for Strings_**** by Samuel Barber**

* * *

SEVEN

o

It had been four days since Irina had made her appearance, and four days of decoding into the early hours of the morning. They had found papers containing the Project Christmas information she had taken from Jack and dates and times of her meetings with her handler, his reports.

Project Christmas seemed to be the only information she ever took from Jack.

Her records from the KGB Academy noted she scored highly in relatively all areas of performance tests and was put on the fast track to a field assignment. It also noted projects she'd worked on before leaving Russia, most notably some sort of code and special language for agents to use in the field.

'No wonder she's such a genius when it comes to decoding.' Sydney thought back to all the times her mother had proven her skills to her while in their custody. 'Of course, she had probably already solved them before turning herself in, being as how she planned the whole thing, their was never any real decoding to be done.'

"Sydney," Jack touched her shoulder, waking her from her daydream, as the conference room filled with people.

"Alright people," Kendall stood at the head of the table waiting for everyone to take their seats. "Just moments ago, Marshall had a break through with the disks, which is why I called you all in here. Marshall." He took his seat and a very nervous Marshall stood.

I finally figured out how to crack the codes using the information I obtained from Agents Bristow, Bristow and Vaughn…. sounds like a law firm, Bristow, Bristow and Vaughn," he smiled to the very un-amused group, although Sydney did smile. "Anyway, I used the information they decoded from the Derevko file… the part about her developing a code, well I figured I might as well try it… nothing else was working… anyway, uh… oh yeah… the code that Cuvee used was the one your mother," he looked at Sydney his eyes wide in wonderment, "developed for him while she was still at the Academy… for a sixteen year old to do that, come up with something like this… is amazing… unbelievable really." He wiped the sweat on his brow. "So… yeah, I tried the code on the disks just moments ago and they are decoding now…should be finished any minute…the way the data was arranged, I think they are video files. I haven't been able to view them yet so this is a premiere of sorts I guess."

The group waited patiently as Marshall loaded the disks.

"Ok, here goes nothing." He pushed Play and everyone turned their' sights on the screen.

Grainy footage of a countdown came onto the screen and then black, a date appeared on the bottom in Russian:

November 27th, 1981

Kashmir Interrogation Prison

Sydney and Jack both tensed with memories flashing back to Irina's reaction when she told them she'd been a prisoner in Kashmir.

Out of the black an eerie familiar tune began to play amidst the sound of people shouting in Russian, mass chaos and metal clanging.

***Da Svidanya***

The tune was the old Soviet Anthem. A blurry picture came into focus and you could instantly see you were in a prison, on the second level, looking down at the lower level, while arms of prisoners, all men, behind bars reached out in front of the camera. They were smiling, some licking the bars and shouting. Hundreds, thousands maybe screaming…their hair was cut and jagged, their clothes torn and hanging off them, dirty and bloody, some missing teeth, no doubt a result of their interrogations.

The camera continued to roll as the cameraman made their way down the aisle, stopping suddenly and turning back to film the arrival of a prisoner below. Peering over the railing, six guards could be seen dragging a prisoner in. Two men in front with machine guns, two dragging the body of a prisoner by the arms, though a face couldn't be seen as the head hang limp towards the floor, and two in the rear with guns. The prisoners began going nuts.

Sydney felt her heart tightening as she saw them bringing the prisoner towards three men waiting at the end, in front of what appeared to be a 'cross.'

The guards stopped and roughly grabbed the hair, now visibly long brown, and whipped her head back. Irina's bloodied face could now be seen clearly on camera, she was conscious, but had clearly been beaten severely. She wore no regular prisoner clothes but a white sheet or sorts tied around her body loosely. Blood from her face that had been beaten stained the white cloth as it fell as did the blood from her wrists, no doubt from interrogation, running like small streams down her arms the guards held her suspended from fully collapsing on the ground.

The man standing in front of her, who's back was to the camera, could be seen conducting along to the music as if amused by it all. Then motioned and the guards swiftly jerked Irina up to eye level, forcing her onto her feet though it was clear she couldn't stand-alone. The man moved around Irina and his face finally came into view,

'Cuvee.' Jack seethed under his breath, his knuckles turning white.

He motioned for the prisoner to be quiet, which they didn't, and continued his making circles around Irina. Stopping to the side of her, he leaned near her ear and whispered something and moved to kiss her on the lips. She bit him and he did nothing, simply smiled and wiped the blood from his lip. She spat the blood from her mouth in defiance and another guard stepped in and slapped her hard.

She made no sound, simply closed her eyes for a long time and opened them again to stare straight in front of her. Two guards appeared out of nowhere, wheeling in a metal table with leather straps and another smaller table covered with a white towel. The men roughly grabbed Irina, throwing her onto the table as she struggled against them but she couldn't fight them off.

A man in a white coat uncovered the smaller table and revealed numerous torture devices. He began inserting long needles into Irina's pressure points on her neck, to which she screamed out in pain.

Cuvee loomed over her and shouted in Russian, _"This woman, Tsarina Irina Nikolaevna Alexandra Dmitrievna Romanova Derevkova, our Imperial Highness…"_ He laughed and the prisoners roared, _"Is charged with disobeying direct orders and withholding evidence that would suggest…she is a traitor to Mother Russia, turning on her own beloved Russia for the Great American Satan! Her first refusal…to terminate the bastard American spawn growing inside her after her 'target husband' impregnated her. She claimed it forged their bond and solidified her position in his life; we forgave this, seeing it as an asset. But instead of being relieved when she received her final orders to kill her 'husband' and to return to Mother Russia with the bastard child… she refused! We took action, to which she saw the error of her mistake in refusing to comply and accepted Extraction."_

The prisoners again when nuts, the man in the white coat continued his pressure point torture on Irina.

Jack and Sydney felt the walls closing in on them…she was there, being tortured for having refused to kill Jack, and take Sydney with her back to Russia.

'What action had they taken to show Irina the errors of her way?'

_"But imagine my surprise when she defied us again, returning without the child, and without killing her target husband!"_

The man in the white coat pulled the white sheet away exposing part of her chest as a another long needle was inserted into Irina who let out another torturous scream that sent the prisoners wild with delight. He then began inserting needles under each of her finger and toenails.

_"So I have to ask myself, why is this agent protecting her enemy and defying her own country? Has she fallen victim to the Great Satan? Does she actually believe she loves them? Or perhaps, that they love her? Does she need a reminder of where her loyalties should and will lie!"_ Cuvee reached inside his jacket and removed two photos…one of Jack and one of Sydney, both taken without Irina's or their knowledge it looked like. He held the photos above Irina's tear-stricken face. _"You see Irina, you cannot 'protect' them from us, you cannot hide anything from us!" He leaned over screaming into her face. "Why would you betray your own country for them? Why?"_ He screamed but she wouldn't answer, and he motioned for another long needle to be inserted.

She screamed out in pain.

_"Why?"_ he screamed again, kneeling near her face.

Again, no answer and again another long needle, was inserted into her pressure point.

_"You are under a Direct Order, Agent Derevko to answer the question. Why?"_ He screamed into her ear.

No answer and again another needle. _"No answer, you have no answer! You continue to defy us...then so be it."_

_"Remove the needles and restraints."_ He instructed. _"She has committed the ultimate act of treason against Russia by siding with the enemy… protecting the enemy. She has been infected by the enemy,"_ he walked over to where the guards were holding Irina up.

Jack had a sinking feeling taking over him that something even worse then the torture was about to happen.

_"Literally… something she, 'forget' to mention. Something, that makes me believe she wasn't having, to sacrifice her body to this man, but that she actually enjoyed her 'husband' having his way with her, enjoyed his touch. Whoring yourself out to him."_ He seethed taking a step closer to Irina._ "She must be cured. Starting by ridding herself of the spawn of the devil she carries inside her."_

_"Noooo!"_ she screamed out, a horrified look in her eyes.

And with that, Cuvee landed a solid right punch, directly into Irina's abdomen...then a left, then a right again. She fell breathless to her knees.

The prisoners went crazy again and Cuvee nodded to the guards, they proceeded to kick her in the abdomen, as she lay curled in the fetal position on the cold cement floor of the prison, trying desperately to protect herself and the baby inside her. The punishing blows went on for what seemed like ever, before Cuvee put his hand up to stop them. Irina lay motionless on the ground.

Jack felt as though he was about to explode, he wanted to kill Cuvee with his bare hands…reach through the screen and kill him, stop him from hurting Irina, from killing their baby…but he realized he couldn't. This was a film about events that happened twenty-one years ago… and he could do nothing.

Cuvee knelt beside her. _"Oh, Irina… what has he done to you? You were one of the best."_ His fingers brushing the hair off her cheek as she lay there. _"Why are you doing this to yourself, Irina? Right now, the man you are sacrificing yourself for…has just found out what you really are… and 'hates' you. From this point on, all he'll see and feel is hate when he thinks about your deception. Your every move, every word is going to be analyzed… and thought of as a lie. He will begin to look at your child and see that hate he feels for you in her, the product of your mission and nothing more. You've destroyed him; you've destroyed your daughter. You should have followed the order and killed him. At least then, he would never have known his entire life was based on a lie… never known what you really are…"_ He motioned the guards and they pulled her up, her head limp against her chest. Cuvee roughly grabbed her face and forced her to look at him. _"Our Royal Russian Whore."_ He dropped her head and motioned the guards again. _"Put her on display as an example of what happens when you betray your government for the enemy. She is like our very own Jesus Christ…we are going to 'rid' her of all her 'sins' with the Americans and resurrect her as a Russian again."_

The men proceeded to tie Irina's wrists to the cross and then her feet. Cuvee walked over and tucked the two photos of Jack and Sydney into the robe, facing out for everyone to see. The officers cranked a lever and the cross with Irina lifted off the ground and into the air, on display for all. Her once white robes, now red with the blood seeping from her body, the baby she tried so desperately to save, lost…

The camera passed the screaming prisoners, still excited over their new female inmate, for a close-up of Irina. Though her long hair hid most of her face, you could tell that she had passed out, and the blood from a cut on her face dripping onto the faces of Jack and Sydney.

"I'm going to be sick." Marshall burped, trying to swallow the bile rising in his stomach and ran for the door.

"Yeah." Weiss bolted for the door as well.

Dixon reached over and pressed pause right at the picture faded to black and a new date appeared:

December 15th, 1981

With the date frozen on the screen Sydney put her head in her hands, trying desperately to process what she'd just seen.

Nothing could have prepared her for it, or Jack who was suddenly staring at his daughter, as if only now just realizing she had witnessed the horrific film as well.

Everyone left in the room sat in silence, not knowing what to say, and waiting for the others to return.

'Royal Russian Whore' Jack's mind kept repeating the phrase over and over, he had told her she was 'nothing but a Royal Russian Whore' the other night when she slapped him, he could now see why.

The bastard Cuvee, who Jack was positively going to hunt down and kill now, had called Irina that because she refused to leave 'him' JACK, because she tried to protect 'their' baby inside her…and Jack had only re-affirmed to Irina, what Cuvee said when he'd called her the same thing… he felt himself getting ill at the thought.

Weiss and Marshall returned again, both looking ill and Marshall carrying a small waste paper can. Sydney wiped a steam of tears running down her face and Vaughn placed his hand over hers.

"Syd, maybe you shouldn't watch this. No one should have to see their mother being tortured like this."

"No…" she began to protest but was cut off by her father who spoke quietly.

"Sydney, he's right. You shouldn't be seeing this."

"Dad, I should be here just like everyone else… maybe more so because I am her daughter and I helped to put her in that God forsaken prison…"

"Sydney, you didn't…" Vaughn began but she angrily cut him off.

"Yes, I did… she refused her superiors because she didn't want to leave us Vaughn, and this is my one chance to see, for myself, what happened. We are all so quick to point out the horrible things 'this monster' has done to other people, myself included, but what about the things that have been done to her? We shouldn't see them because it would it would what, humanize her? If we hadn't just watched that… none of us would know that she betrayed the KGB in order to save my father's life. I think we, or at least I… owe it to her to find out what she went through. I need to understand… I'm staying." Sydney's resolve to stay and prove she could handle it took over, "Go ahead Marshall, push Play." She nodded at him with a confidence she didn't feel.

***An Angel Falls***

Marshall looked to Jack, silently asking for permission. Jack nodded slowly and the film began to Play again.

The film began much the same as the other, with cameraman filming from the second story looking down as the guards drug Irina to the waiting men. She was now clothed in the traditional prison garb: blue shirt and pants that resembled scrubs but she had no shoes. She was terribly thin, her cheeks sunken in, her clothes hanging on her frame. Irina was putting up quite the struggle even with her hands cuffed behind her back, the guards moving too quickly for her to find her footing. They stopped at the end once again, in front of the cross where they'd left her hanging the last time. The prisoners began rioting once again at seeing Irina. A guard shouted for her to kneel but Irina remained still, defiant. He cracked her across the back of the legs with a club and she fell to her knees.

"Happy Birthday Irina." Cuvee smiled down at her. "They tell me, that you've not been cooperating. Naughty girl… naughty, naughty, naughty." He shook his finger back and forth as he paced in front of her. "Such a wild free spirit you have, so strong willed. Your time here… would be much more enjoyable, if you'd just give in. Answer our questions… promise to be a good little spy from now on… and prove your loyalty to me, instead of that pig you called a husband." He smiled brushing the skin on Irina's neck with his fingers in a suggestive manner following the curve of the neckline to her chest.

Irina refused to look at him. "You're the pig." She hissed and was promptly backhanded by one of the guards, the force breaking her lip open.

"Every wild horse can be broken."

His leer at Irina was nauseating to everyone in the conference room. Sydney instantly had a flashback of Cuvee reminding her mother of the same thing when he'd been threatening Sydney in Moscow.

"Her beloved American 'husband' has tainted our beautiful Russian woman gentlemen," He smiled to the guards standing watch, " I believe she is now disgusted by the touch of a real man… a Russian man." He ran his fingers over the back of Irina's hair. "In honor of your birthday, we will celebrate by giving you a re-birth… a chance to rethink your position on your countrymen and make life easier on you." He cupped Irina's face looking into her eyes.

Without speaking the words, everyone knew exactly what that meant. Sleep with Cuvee or face the consequences of torture.

"Never." Irina turned her face away from his touch.

"But I would have been so gentle." He smiled back before standing to face the guards. "I believe she needs persuasion," He nodded to the men who immediately, and roughly hauled Irina to her feet.

Irina's face flashed with fear as two men brought a table into the center. She tried to fight them, but her arms were still cuffed behind her back. Two guards came to help hold her as the other two re-cuffed her flat against the table. One hand at each of the far ends; the table stopping to support her just at her hips, leaving her legs dangling over the side. Knowing this was not going to be good she tried desperately to pull on her restraints.

"You brought this on yourself, Irina. I gave you a chance. You will come to loathe Jack Bristow, I guarantee it." He kissed her on the side of her mouth and signaled one of the officers next to him. "She's all yours boys."

Irina started screaming hysterically in a panicked chant, "No! No! No!" And pulling roughly against the cuffs on her wrists, keeping an eye on the man undoing and removing his ammo belt, gun and hat in front of her with a nasty gleam in his eye.

"No! No! No!" Irina continued chanting, somehow willing the words to stop the actions.

Cuvee seemed to be amused at Irina struggling, "And when all of you are done," he looked to the eight guards around him, "give the prisoners in Cell-block A, a round with her. Prisoners who cooperate deserve rewards; it's been awhile since they've been with a woman. I think they'll enjoy a round with a beautiful woman and what a coincidence there are exactly nineteen of them, twenty-seven in all… one for each year you've been alive." Cuvee laughed and walked away.

Irina's eyes grew wider in horror as the prisoners responded with loud cheering and shaking of their bars. She pulled desperately at the cuffs, her wrists bleeding with her efforts. The harder she pulled on them the more they'd bleed. Tears coming to her eyes as she watched the man walk towards her. She started violently swinging her legs and kicking the man as he tried to get close to her. One swift kick nailed him just outside his groin, narrowly missing the intended target.

"Bitch!" He seethed in Russian and tried again, motioning for his fellow guards to help him in the cause. She violently fought with all her might, pulling as hard as she could against the restraints and kicking madly at the men.

Seeing the men were winning she pulled as hard as she could against one of her restraints, whimpering with pain etched in her face as she pulled harder and harder, the metal digging into the already open wound she had there. She kept pulling and kicking unwilling to give up. Suddenly there was a loud 'pop' and Irina screamed out in pain as she had effectively dislocated her shoulder. She kept up the assault with her legs and then Irina felt a sharp jab into her hip and realized the man in the white coat was back, and had just injected her with something. He nodded to the guards and soon after Irina felt the energy draining from her body, it was becoming more and more difficult to move her legs.

"I've just given you something to temporarily paralyze you. You will be fully conscious, feel everything, but won't be able to move or speak soon." The man stated without an expression.

Irina let out one last cry of desperation as the tears began to fall, "Jaaaaack!" Her blood-curdling scream faded as she began losing the battle with the drugs. Her face turned to the side, directly facing another camera on the ground floor, just a few feet away. Tears could be seen running over the bridge of her nose falling onto the cold metal table. Her struggle for freedom had caused her metal handcuffs to rip into her flesh all the way to the bone. With one last gasp she whispered, "Jack," looking directly into the camera as if somehow begging him to save her from this fate.

***Adagio for Strings***

Jack felt as though his heart had been ripped out hearing her begging him to save her. The look in her eyes sending shivers down his spine. He couldn't swallow, he couldn't breathe, he couldn't move…all he could do was sit and watch as the horror continued. He wasn't seeing Irina Derevko the woman who'd betrayed him, the killer and terrorist mafia leader… he saw his wife, the love of his life, the mother of his child.

The guard gently grabbed the top of her pants, hesitating a moment to caress the soft skin of her stomach with his fingers. Giving her a disgusting look, he took both hands and violently ripped her pants off. He undid his trousers; pants falling to his knees, grabbed Irina's hips forcefully and proceeded, in violating her in the worst way a woman could be violated. Pain, anger, and sheer-torment could be seen racing through Irina's dark brown eyes, they spoke volumes for what her mouth could not.

The prisoners shouted and gyrated their hips against the bars in a disgusting manor, matching the guard's thrusts with their own. He reached under Irina's shirt forcefully grabbing her breast. It wasn't enough and he ripped her shirt down the middle, exposing her fully. Another roar surged through the prison and the guards could be seen smiling at her naked form, lying helplessly strapped to the table.

When he finished, another guard stepped in, and then another, and another… each quicker in their' 'release' from watching the men before. Then prisoner after prisoner had their turn, Irina's tears never stopping, her eyes never leaving the camera to look at the men having their way with her.

The footage cutting back and forth between a close-up of Irina's reaction and then switching to a wider view of the entire act of the men violating her.

Jack felt Irina's eyes bearing into his soul. Just as he was about to yell for Marshall to stop the footage, as he couldn't take anymore, the screen went to black. He had tried to concentrate on her eyes, not the horrible acts being committed against her, willing her somehow to see that he wasn't leaving her, she wasn't alone, she would survive this… the thought absurd to him now in reflection. This was the past, she was alone; he wasn't there because 'she' had left him. Jack felt his eyes getting blurry and realized he was on the verge of tears, thankful for the dimmed lights so no one could see his emotions. But looking up he saw Sydney was visibly crying, the tears streaming down her cheeks. He could hear Marshall sniffing behind him, conceivably in tears as well, and as he looked around the room he saw pools of liquid glistening in the eyes of some of Irina's toughest critics to his surprise, Dixon, Kendall, and even Vaughn.

'How could they not?' You would have to be made of stone not to get emotional over the gang rape of a woman, even if that woman was Irina Derevko.

The footage rolled on and various dates passed by, all snippets of film from her various torture sessions. The dates causing memories to mix in the minds of Jack and Sydney, for example: on Christmas, Irina was being tortured with electrocution; Jack's birthday, she was raped and had needles stuck in her eyes; Sydney's seventh birthday was pressure point incision torture with flames burning the souls of her feet.

Of course, not all the dates listed held such significance but the torture was present none the less: electrocution, flames to the bottom of her feet, teeth extraction, needles to the eyes, and of course pressure point incisions, truth serums and physical beatings, and more sessions of rape.

Marshall understanding now, why the woman in the cell that day…was so tough, and Jack, her 'this is nothing…' comment in Panama when he removed the tracker.

They'd all seen torture before, committed the acts themselves even…but no one was as ruthless as the KGB when it came to punishing torture. Irina's appearance and health seemed to deteriorate everyday that passed and finally, a date they recognized as her attempted escape May 27th, 1982. The footage went by quickly but was horrifying none-the-less.

An unconscious Irina, who'd been beaten very badly from her appearance, was drug across the floor by one arm and into a room with a small hole of light; the door was slammed and locked. The next date to appear was the date of her release from solitary March 30th, 1983. The door opened and a very weak Irina was escorted out. She immediately shunned at the light, after not having seen it in quite some time, hiding behind her now incredibly long hair. The prison clothes that had hung on her body before; now covered only a skeleton. Her bones could visibly be made out as they protruded through the fabric. Her shoulders, sternum and ribs, spine…all of them like jagged edge, the skin now drooping between the bones, of her once muscular arms.

"God, she looks like a Holocaust victim." Kendall said softly, none of the usual venom it carried when he spoke of Irina Derevko, no hate or anger in his voice, only empathy for someone who had survived so much. The once breathtaking woman had become a bag of bones.

As the man in the white coat inspected Irina on the screen, it wasn't her appearance, though that was bad enough, that haunted Jack… it was the look in Irina's eyes. Her once beautiful, soul-full eyes, full of life, light, wonder, and intrigue were now hollow and dull. Jack searched but there was no light, no sparkle, no recognition, at all. Her soul, her life… gone… they had succeeded in breaking her spirit. She spoke nothing, only nodded her head 'yes' or 'no' in compliance to the questions asked.

June 17th, 1983

The day they knew of as Irina's release from prison. The footage began facing an empty table. Two men entered and took seats on one side of the table, their backs to the camera. Something about this seemed familiar to both Jack and Sydney but they couldn't place it. Suddenly, it clicked for both of them as a healthier looking Irina took her seat on the opposite side of the table. This was the tape of her debriefing. The men: Cuvee and Khasinau.

CIA already had the debriefing in their possession, with what they thought was her real KGB file. Jack had memorized every agonizing word as he'd watched it many times before, her harsh words about him biting at his very soul.

Now as he watched the same tape he realized, it had been filmed years after her extraction…Years she spent in a torturous hellhole suffering the consequences of betraying the KGB for him…for saving his life and their daughter's.

She had been broken, rebuilt and reprogrammed. He could see that now in her perfectly phrased answers. She was being the 'good little loyal spy' Cuvee had said she would be. She was proving her loyalty for him, and her disgust for Jack.

"How can she just sit there like that, across the table from that man? After everything he did to her, she berates you! Says you're the fool! She's the fool for sitting there and not reaching over the table and strangling him! How could she?" Sydney's emotions had been through the gauntlet today and she wasn't thinking clearly, her tears and pain for what her mother had been through, confused by how she was capable of giving her loyalty back to him. She knew the obvious reasons why, but she needed them pointed out to her.

"Sydney," Jack spoke softly, looking from the video playing of Irina's debriefing and back to his daughter, "they broke her… A human being can only take so much. She must have realized, that she had to comply or die in that Godforsaken place… She chose to comply and survive."

Jack had summed it up and brought it home to everyone, Irina Derevko was a human being. Something none of them had wanted to see until it was right in front of them, forced upon them by witnessing the tragedies against her.

They had always referred to her as the, 'heartless cold blooded monster' who had no emotions because she showed, no emotions. Now, they could see a glimpse of why.

The group sat in silence, lost in thought, believing the video files were over with when flashes of light and a dark grainy image appeared. A man was standing in front of the camera holding a Russian newspaper.

"Can anybody read that date?" Kendall asked quickly.

"November 10th, 1981." Dixon jumped up and stood in front of the screen, reading the newspaper print. Alarm bells immediately going off in Vaughn, Jack and Sydney's heads.

Three days before Irina had received her second set of orders after refusing the first. Dixon took his seat again and the man on the screen turned around, revealing two other people behind him.

An older woman in her late sixties or earlier seventies, they guessed at her age, sat gagged in a chair, her arms apparently tied behind her back. The older woman was remarkably beautifully and the striking resemblance to Irina was hard to miss. A man stood behind her, the woman was visibly upset. The man who had been holding the newspaper stood off to the side of the woman now, looking intently at the woman and then at the camera.

"You have defied your KGB orders and in doing so you have betrayed Mother Russia, literally…betrayed your own mother." He glanced down at the older woman. _"Your defiance will not go unpunished."_ He nodded his head at the other man, who raised a gun to the temple of the woman, then removed the gag in her mouth.

The newspaperman knelt beside the woman, _"Do you have any last words for your traitorous daughter Anastasia, excuse me…Your Imperial Majesty: Tsarina Anastasia, Empress of all Russias. How clumsy of me to forget your long lost title."_His sickening smile had no apparent affect on the woman who continued to stare intently at the camera.

_"Sweetheart, love abides by no boundaries or laws made by man…only the heart. I understand your love for your family… and I forgive you, Irina. I love you forever and always…"_ With tears streaming down her cheeks the woman smiled and the man pulled the trigger.

_"Well that was touching."_ Spoken with no emotion as he wiped the blood sprays from his jacket. Taking a step forward from her body he turned his gaze directly into the camera. _"Do not' make the same mistake of defying the order of extraction again! Or we will be forced to kill the other precious girl in your life…"_ He reached into his pocket and held out a picture of Sydney playing in the yard, proving they had access to her, to the camera,_ "This time, in front of you… just before you die."_

The men left the area, the last visible image was Irina's mother slumped to the side… blood pooling around the chair from her body, then blackness.

"Oh my God!" Sydney shrieked in terror; new tears springing forth realizing she'd just watched her grandmother's execution. Suddenly understanding why her mother had to leave her…if she hadn't, they would have killed them all. Her grandmother's words ringing in her ears… Irina had refused to leave because of her love for Jack and Sydney, a choice that cost her own mother's life. Sydney couldn't take anymore and ran out of the room, followed quickly by Vaughn.

All these years, Jack had thought he and Sydney were the only ones suffering the fallout of Irina's mission…but he was wrong, Irina had suffered just as much, maybe more. He at least had Sydney to get him through… Irina had lost them, her mother… the baby… her spirit. He was being to see now, why she became so obsessed with the Rambaldi Prophecy, it was the only part of her, she had left… trying to fill in the missing pieces, the void losing everything must have created in her.

'Oh why didn't I just listen to her?' Jack fumed inside. Not that he would have listened to anything she said; 'she lied about everything,' this Jack was always certain after he learned the 'truth' about her long ago… What he was being to realize now, was that the biggest lie of all was the lie of omission… So many things he never knew about. So many questions he still had. He needed to find her. They had to talk.

"Jack," Dixon's soft voice broke into Jack's reverie, "Are you ok?"

Jack seemed surprised by the question and was immediately defensive. "Yes, of course. Why would you ask something like that?" Jack began collecting the papers in front of him.

"Because today we all saw some pretty traumatic things…things that are very personal to you, false pretenses or not…she was your wife and the mother of your child."

Jack stopped shuffling the papers to glare at Dixon.

Kendall jumped in and saved Dixon, "Jack, you've been sitting there for the last five minutes staring at the table. Don't pretend this didn't effect you, hell… it affected me… affected all of us." His tone softer, "Go home… it's been a long day."

"No, we need to start analyzing this information so we can find…" Jack began to protest, not really wanting to go back to home to a very empty house alone.

"Jack, it can wait... and we will find her." Knowing exactly what Jack was thinking and for the first time, his own tone softening when thinking about finding Irina. "I want to go home to, shit… I need a drink or two…Go home, Jack."

Jack nodded in agreement and walked out of the office, hoping to find Sydney. She was nowhere to be seen and though he wanted to wait, he couldn't stand the scrutiny of the eyes on him. Everyone was already talking about 'the Irina Derevko files.' 'Bad news travels fast.' He shook his head; he had to find Sydney… he couldn't leave until he'd seen her.

Sydney had bolted out of the door and straight into the ladies room, where she finally gave into the nausea she'd been feeling since the film on her mother began.

As if throwing up the contents in her stomach would somehow expel the horrible images of her mother from her mind.

Vaughn tapped on the stall door, "You ok?" He heard the flush of the toilet and backed away letting Sydney out.

"You aren't supposed to be in here." She tried to smile at him going to the sink to wash her hands.

"Syd… you can talk to me, it's ok." He spoke softly and Sydney looked into the mirror to meet his eyes.

"No, Vaughn, I can't…not about this…not about my mother. This doesn't change the fact that she killed your father."

"Yes, I know that. But it does force me to see her as more then your mother and my father's killer… Syd," he grabbed her shoulder turning her towards him, "What we saw today… I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. I wouldn't wish on Irina Derevko. Up until today, I always thought of her as a killing machine… a killing machine with no feelings, no emotion…her only loyalties to herself. I saw what happened to her for disobeying an order… Killing my father, was an order. Part of me wants to say she could have refused to kill him if she wanted to, like she had refused to kill your father… but knowing now what that cost her... that they were blackmailing her with your life if she refused… I don't know… she killed my father but saved your life… I just don't know what to think right now." He pulled her close and held her as the tears began to fall again.

"If this is what she meant by '_Truth Takes Time'_ then, Vaughn, I don't know how much more truth I can stand… but I have to, I have to know it all, now more then ever. I have so many questions for her, so many things that still don't make sense... so many things I want to understand. Vaughn, I don't remember anything around the time my mother 'died' because of the Project Christmas training… but I had to have been there when she found out about her mother, my grandmother. My father was on a mission, but those last few days… was just my mother and me… I have to remember what she said." Sydney pulled out of his arms, and Vaughn knew where she was heading. He didn't stop her, knowing how badly she needed to put the missing pieces of her life together.


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: Music this chapter (on repeat): _When Somebody Loved Me_ by Sarah McLaclan from the _Toy Story Two Soundtrack,_ _Warning Sign_ by Coldplay, _Samba de Orly_ by Bebel Gilberto from the _Rio Soundtrack_**

* * *

EIGHT

o

"Sydney, are you certain about this?" The doctor asked sticking the last electrode to her temple.

"Yes, I want to remember this." Remembering her mother's talk about needs and wants and the difference, "I need to remember this." Deciding this simply wasn't a want, but a crucial piece of information that would have undoubtedly remained with her had her father not erased them.

"Ok, listen to the sound of my voice." The doctor started the process as Vaughn watched from the booth.

Jack opened the door, to Vaughn's surprise. He'd heard Sydney had headed this way and was worried. He said nothing, simply nodded his head in recognition and stood beside the younger man.

***When Somebody Loved Me***

"You're six years old… it's November and you have just been told by your daddy that your mommy died in a car accident. Do you remember?"

"Yes…" Sydney began crying at seeing herself. "I am sitting on my father's lap in our living room, a plate of cookies is on the table, I am crying… Dad just told me Mom died…she was never coming home…" She began crying harder.

Jack felt the anger rising in him again at the pain his daughter went through.

"Sydney, you are ok. Your mom didn't die; she is still alive…this is just a flashback to a memory. Now…can you remember back a couple of days…your daddy has just left on a business trip and you are at home with your mommy. What are you doing?"

Sydney began smiling. "I am sitting on the counter in front of my mother. We are making cookies, and reading Cinderella while we wait. We always make cookies when Daddy leaves on trips." She started laughing.

"What is so funny, Sydney?"

"I just put frosting on Mommy's nose. She laughed and put frosting on mine and now we are giving each other Eskimo nose kisses of frosting. We are laughing. She is so happy, smiling."

Even after today, Vaughn still had trouble envisioning Irina Derevko as a loving mother with 'frosted noses and Eskimo kisses,' that sounded more like his mother. He was especially having trouble with the image as this was around the same time Irina had killed his father and the other agents.

"She wipes the frosting off our noses and keeps reading. I love to hear her read to me." Sydney smiled again, "I just told her she was the most beautiful princess of all… She looks at me startled, and then laughs, smothering me in kisses. We start laughing again and I try to tickle her, but she tickles me…pulling me off the counter onto the floor."

A laughing Sydney makes Vaughn smile and Jack sad; he remembered times like this but had tried to forget them all. Convincing him self she was never a real mother, never loved Sydney…for so many years he'd believed this.

"I beg her to stop, and she does. I just jumped on her ambushing her with the tickles. I am sitting on her, making her beg to stop…she finally gives in." Sydney's face was suddenly a mixture of happy and sadness.

"Sydney, what are you seeing?"

"We are still on the floor, but now I am lying on her chest…listening to her heartbeat. She is stroking my back…and puts my hair behind my ear. She says she 'loves me to the moon and back… more then the stars in the heavens and the grains of sand on Earth…forever and always.' She always said that. I forgot…" A tear slid down Sydney's cheek and then laughed, "I just told her that her heart sounds like a washing machine. She's laughing… the door bell just rang and she is getting up to answer it… she kissed the top of my head and I follow her to the door."

"Do you see who's at the door, is it someone you know?"

"There is a man at the door dressed in a black suit… He says 'Hello' to me… Mommy tells him not to speak to me… she's got a scared look on her face and pushes me behind her… she is yelling at the man 'to leave the house, he shouldn't be there."

"What does the man want?"

"He says he has to talk to her…to 'show her something 'important' from the boss.' He is holding a small black box. I recognize it…its like the ones we have our family movies on."

"What does your mother do?"

"She tells him 'No. She's not leaving… and he needs to leave now!' But he comes inside and shuts the door behind him. I am really scared; Mommy is scared I can see it in her eyes. She is kneeling down to talk to me."

"What does she tell you?"

"She says she has to talk about something important with the man, to go upstairs and color and she'll come get me when she is done. I ask her where she is leaving to…She tells me she 'isn't going anywhere…for me not to worry' and tries to smile... I can tell she is upset but I go… the man knows my name, he says 'goodbye Sydney' and tells me he will see me later. I stop on the stairs but Mommy tells me to 'Go!' so I start running."

Jack swallowed hard… the man, no doubt Irina's handler, had come to their home…when Sydney was there. He was angry but took a deep breath realizing Irina hadn't been thrilled about the idea of the man there either.

"What do you do when you get to your room?"

"I get my colors and sit on the floor, I am coloring a picture for my daddy when he gets home."

Jack smiled at the memory, Sydney was always drawing him pictures for his office at work selling 'airplane parts.' Usually of they were drawings of their family and airplanes, of course, she had no idea what he really did, 'Thank God,' he couldn't have her drawing pictures of that!

"I hear Mommy screaming 'No!'… I am scared." Sydney began crying and rocking back and forth in the chair.

"Sydney, your are ok, this is a memory. You are ok; your mom is ok. What did you do next?"

"I remembered her telling me that she would come get me when she was done but I was scared for her, so I am walking down the hallway… crawling now as I approach the banister. I hear the door open and close… I hear my mommy crying… she is really crying hard. I look through the rails and…" Sydney was still scared.

"What do you see?"

"My mommy… she's on the floor, crying so hard her body is shaking… I want to go to her but I am scared, I have never seen her like this so I am waiting… I walk slowly down the stairs but she doesn't notice me… I sit next to her on the floor and put my hand on her head. She looks up at me… she is surprised and then grabs me tight, holding me really tight … I am hugging her telling her 'it will be ok. Don't cry Mommy.' We sit there a long time, rocking on the floor together. She has her face in my neck and I can feel her tears."

"What happened then?"

"I asked her why she was upset… she said that someone she loved had died… she pulls me back to look at me… I wipe the tears from her cheeks with my fingers, she holds my hands there, against her face, closes her eyes… and starts crying again… she opens them and kisses my hands…then my cheeks… tells me she 'loves me so much she never wants to say goodbye.' I tell her she is silly, we tell Daddy 'goodbye' all the time and she doesn't cry unless he goes away for a long, long time..." Tears were streaming down Sydney's cheeks. "She smiles and I kiss her cheek and throw my arms around her, hugging her neck…I tell her I love her to the moon and back, more then the stars in the heavens and grains of sand on Earth, forever and always. She is still crying…we smell the cookies burning and I jump out of her arms… I tell her we have to get the cookies out or they will burn for Daddy… I am pulling on Mommy's arm…she gets up and follows me into the kitchen. The cookies are burnt and I start crying… she tells me its 'ok, we will make more.' She keeps kissing my head and hugging me… telling me she loves me forever and always." Tears kept a steady stream down Sydney's face, and Vaughn shifted uncomfortably in his chair, this day was certainly stressful and emotionally wrecking havoc on him and the one he loved.

"Sydney, can you remember the last time you saw your mother? What was she doing?"

"We are about ready to leave… I am going next door for a piano lesson and to have a tea party with Ms. Adams because Mommy has to work on some papers at school. She's kneeling on the floor putting my toys and piano books in my backpack… she is crying… I touch her cheek and tell her not to be sad anymore… she smiles… asks for a big hug. She said she is 'going to miss me so much it hurts…'she pulls me back and is staring into my eyes…she uses her fingers and brushes the hair behind my ear… she is telling me to be good and play nice, to listen to Ms. Adams… she starts crying again and gives me a another big hug and tons of kisses that make me giggle… She is holding her hand up now… I put my hand against hers… its so small compared to hers… she wraps her fingers around mine and says she 'will love me forever and always… to the moon and back…' I finish for her, more then stars in the heavens and the grains of sand on Earth…'yes', she says with a smile through her tears… 'Don't ever forget that, Sweetheart… forever and always.' Sydney was sobbing now as she spoke, "She put my backpack on and takes my hand in hers… she is rubbing the back of my hand with her thumb as we walk to Ms. Adams."

Jack remembered the gesture well… she had always done that when she was upset, the last time on the plane to Hong Kong.

"She stands at the end of the sidewalk waving as I go into the house…that's it… I never saw her again." Sydney sobbed; Vaughn was having a hard time not tearing up.

"No Sydney, you did see her again…she is alive…this is a memory."

Sydney suddenly flashed into the present.

Vaughn hurried out the booth to her side. Jack followed slowly behind, unsure how Sydney would react to his being there. She said nothing.

"I forgot. I can't believe I forgot. She tried to tell me, tried to tell me she always loved me. Vaughn, when my mother first turned herself in… remember, she led us to Sark and the music box by telling us about music and math. She asked me if I remembered what Ms. Adams had taught me… then asked about the play."

Vaughn gave her a confused look, not following along but Jack knew exactly what she was referring to.

"Don't you see? She was trying to see if I remembered… remembered what she'd said before she left. I didn't… I had forgotten because of the Project Christmas programming, because you," her harsh gaze turning on Jack, "wanted me to forget the training… but I forgot everything else from that time too. That's when she figured out, what you had done to me… and you almost had her executed for it! Oh God," She pulled the sensors from her head and chest. "I have to go." She jumped up from the chair heading for the door.

"Where are you going?" Vaughn asked concerned for her emotional wellbeing at the moment.

Jack felt helpless to stop her, unprepared for her assault. "Sydney-"

"No Dad… you programmed me to be a spy because you claimed you wanted to protect me, because you love me and didn't want anything bad to happen to me," Jack nodded, that was his intent, "Mom left because she wanted to protect me, because she loved me and didn't want anything bad to happen to me… So how is what you did to me forgivable and what she did isn't? Your reasons were the same? How can you, how can I blame her for doing exactly what you did She is a traitor and a killer because she was a spy for the KGB…she stole information, gave it to her country and they used it for their own benefit, she killed people on orders because they stood in the way of the KGB mission… She lied and deceived those she loved… How big of hypocrites can we be?" She took a deep breath; her nostrils flaring at she tried to calm herself. "We do the same thing… we spy and steal information for our country and use it for our own benefit… we kill on orders if the person stands in the way of our mission… we lie and deceive the ones we love to protect them from our jobs… So why is it that we think we are any better then she is? What separates her from us… the country and agency we work for? That's it… If she was CIA she would be acceptable but because she is/was KGB we have to hunt her down, lock her up and throw away the key or worse, execute her for the same crimes we commit on a daily basis."

"Sydney, she killed my father! How do you expect me to think that she shouldn't be punished for that?" Vaughn was angry. Angry because what Sydney was saying was true, but at the same time… this woman had killed his father, destroying his life.

"That's not what I am saying, Vaughn... But think about how many 'fathers' we've killed on our missions, how many children out there whose lives we've destroyed, never thinking twice about doing it because it was part of the mission, they were the bad guys and it was necessary."

Jack and Vaughn remained silent, Sydney's words ringing true.

"I've been so ignorant, if she's a monster… then so am I… I have to go." She turned to leave again.

"Where are you going?" Vaughn repeated the earlier question.

"I don't know yet. I'm sorry, Vaughn, please understand this isn't about you…I just have to think for awhile, process all this..."

***Warning Sign***

He nodded and she kissed his lips, not caring that her father was there. She turned to look at Jack and was out the door before he could say 'goodbye.'

Jack hadn't been sure how long he'd been sitting on the porch swing in the dark, when he saw headlights pulling into the drive. It was late, that much he knew. Sydney stepped onto the porch, her arms crossed across her chest. Her eyes met his and he patted the open space next to him. They sat in silence for a moment.

"I'm sorry." Sydney finally spoke, unwilling to look at Jack just yet. "I didn't mean to yell at you like that, I don't blame you…I was just so frustrated… I blame myself for being so naive, trying once again to make everything either black or white when I know life isn't that simple."

"There's enough blame to go around, we all share it." He reached across and took hold of her hand. "Are you ok?" He was truly worried about her wellbeing after today.

"Truthfully…no." She answered honestly to Jack's surprise. "I can't get the images out of my head and my mind is racing at a million miles an hour trying to keep up and process everything. There is no way I can sleep."

"Me neither." Jack smiled softly, not being able to think about anything but the look in Irina's eyes and hearing her scream out his name for help.

"Thinking about it now… I don't know how she could stand to be locked up after she turned herself in... Or Kashmir." She sighed. "I'm the one that blackmailed her into going back, saying if 'she really wanted to protect me as she claimed to… she'd go back."

"Sydney, you didn't know she had been a prisoner… you didn't know what happened to her there."

"Dad, we're spies…we should have figured it out."

"Yes, we seem to have a hard time concentrating when your mother is around." He smiled slightly at Sydney. "She was right, I was an idiot… I missed all the signs… Her knowledge of the sewer tunnels, the landmine locations… I had wrongfully assumed she was an officer there and she let us believe it, though I doubt if situations were reversed… I would have offered up that information either, unless forced…like I did to her." Jack sighed hanging his head the memory.

"I remember being so surprised when she told us… the look on her face, the quiver in her voice… the tears in her eyes… it was the first time I saw some of the walls she built up crumbling, if only for a moment… I began to realize there was more to her then meets the eye. And Cuvee… watching him torture you…kiss Mom and lick her face… I seriously don't how she refrained from killing him right there, after what he did to her."

Jack remembered the image well, seeing Cuvee kiss Irina had made his blood boil, he never thought it was doing the same to her. "She's a master at compartmentalizing." He finally realized.

"I guess she had to be," Sydney's mind once again flashing back to the horror show of the day. "I still don't understand how she could work with him again, or why? Unless it was a means to an end, he had what she wanted and she was willing to do anything to get it…"

"Rambaldi." Jack took a deep breath, closing his eyes.

"Well now we know she is the one in the Prophecy…" Sydney leaned back against the wooden slates of the swing. "What that means and how Sloane is connected remains to be seen. I remember him telling her that he needed 'her body' to realize the word of Rambaldi… and then he was going to give 'it' to Cuvee. Makes me sick to think about the possibilities that could mean," she paused to look at Jack, "Dad, that night… when Cuvee was threatening me… he told me I reminded him of Mom at this age, 'young, defiant… full of spirit.' He made it a point to remind Mom 'that all wild spirits can be broken… 'I never understood what that meant until today." Tears were once again forming in Sydney's eyes at the thought.

"You were right… what you said today." Jack continued to stare straight ahead, "The line between who's right and wrong, good and evil…isn't as clear as we'd like to believe and differs greatly from person to person. I had never wanted to think about that before, because I didn't want to cloud my judgment…start second-guessing my work and I couldn't handle that. Maybe…that's why it is so easy to hate Irina Derevko… she is the epitome of everything I can't stand about living this life, being a spy…because she's the same thing. But with Laura,"

He paused, swallowing hard realizing he was talking about the same person, "It was just a love that came so easily…I wasn't 'Jack the CIA Agent spy' when I was with her…she was my sanctuary from that life. She… you… were the epitome of everything I loved about my life." Jack held his breath; he'd never been this open with Sydney about anything…especially where her mother was concerned.

Sydney had never heard her father so open; today was certainly one for startling revelations. "But Dad… they are the same person… I never wanted to see it either, saw 'them' as completely separate people… even told Mom so…that Irina wasn't my mother, that Laura was. But now I realize… my mother was always Irina, that Laura is…was Irina…We were just never able to see all of her…like reading one chapter of a book and believing it's the whole story."

"I know… I didn't want to believe it either…in fact, I was constantly comparing things I saw Irina doing to the things that 'Laura' did, trying to prove somehow, that 'everything' about 'Laura' had been a manipulation, part of the fabricated life she made with me because it was easier to hate Irina without seeing 'Laura' in her…" Jack shifted his weight uncomfortably on the swing. "The way she stood, the way she brushed her hair and teeth, the way she bit her lip when she was unsure about what to say, or brushed it with her fingers while she was listening intently… The way she laughed… they were all the same, 'Laura' was Irina, Irina was 'Laura.' Then I began to think how absurd the idea was that Irina had fabricated the way she brushed her teeth as Laura, and be able to keep up all those lies for so many years. I was so desperate to find and latch on to one more reason to hate her… to not trust her, to believe that all she ever wanted to do was destroy us."

"It was easier believing they were two separate people, because I could still love 'my mother,' miss her… and still hate Irina Derevko. Realizing she was both… complicates things because I feel torn… as a daughter who loves her mother and an agent after a terrorist."

Jack understood fully and nodded.

They were both quiet for a while, lost in thought.

"You really analyzed Mom brushing her teeth?" Sydney giggled, unable to maintain a serious face.

Jack smiled realizing it 'was' actually kind of funny. "Yep… guilty."

"So what's your analysis… does she brush long enough, use correct positioning." Sydney laughed, enjoying poking fun at her Dad. They hadn't laughed like this, seen her Dad smile… since... since the train and the 'drunken toaster' moment with her mother.

"She's very thorough. Always runs the water over her toothpaste, starts on the right: twenty seconds, then the left: twenty seconds, she spits, more water, then the front, the bottom, the top and tongue…rinses her toothbrush and taps it on the sink three times." He said in all seriousness.

Sydney was stunned, "Wow…you really did analyze her."

"Sydney, I was with your mother for eleven years… we brushed our teeth together every morning, and every night when we were together… I saw the same routine day after day… I am a spy and trained to notice detail… hard not to."

Sydney was quiet thinking about her parents morning rituals…she was still having trouble picturing them sitting in the same room, let a lone, sharing the bathroom brushing their teeth.

"Like the way you eat an ice cream cone… always biting the top and then licking the sides all the way around, first clockwise, then counter, then clock, then counter."

This made Sydney laugh and surprised her that her father had paid such close attention to these small details. "Well I have a confession to make too… I was analyzing Mom's movements as well… but for a different purpose. I wanted to see how much of me, I got from her… like the way we both tuck our hair behind our ears…"

"Or scrunch your eyebrows down when you are unsure about something or are thinking." Jack added knowing all to well the similarities between his daughter and her mother. "Or your stubbornness." He smiled and Sydney laughed knowing it was true, even Irina had agreed on that. "I am really happy you came over tonight, Sydney."

"Me too." She smiled, "We've come along way…" She added softly thinking back just a year ago when they barely spoke, unless mission related.

"Yes." Jack had been thinking the same thing.

"Mom leaving our lives…put distance between us…" Sydney contemplated, "and her return…has brought us closer again."

Jack nodded agreeing with the assessment.

"Dad… we need to find Mom."

"I know, but, Sydney, if your mother doesn't want to be found… it's unlikely we will find her and if by chance we do, she is bound to escape again. Egos aside, I think we both know she's the best spy in this family. What?" He asked off Sydney's surprised look.

"You just called us a family." Her eyes still wide at her father calling Irina Derevko part of their family. Jack remained silent, contemplating his wording as well.

"Sydney, you do realize that if, when we find your mother, she… she broke her immunity agreement..." Jack looked to Sydney to see if she was following where he was going with this. "She will either serve a Life-Term or most likely be Executed." He fell silent.

"But Dad, she defied the KGB to save your life… my life more than once, doesn't that count for something?" Sydney was upset with the notion of putting her mother back in prison for the rest of her life after what they'd witnessed today… her mother would rather be dead, this she knew, and that wasn't something Sydney could think about. Not so long ago… she had wished her mother would have died… but that was before she knew the truth or at least part of it.

"Maybe, but doubtful. She has a long list of crimes against this country… Multiple counts of murder, theft, espionage…each one of those alone, punishable by death." Jack brought the reality back into the situation.

"I know… it's just… I have so many unanswered questions… and I need her to know that…" She couldn't finish the thought out loud… unable to believe what she was about to admit.

"You need her to know what?" Jack asked softly, already having a pretty good idea, though he wasn't sure he would get Sydney to admit that she still 'loved' her mother, in spite of everything...

"I just… I think she should know… that we know the truth. That she didn't want to leave us… that she really did love us… about my grandmother… Kashmir…" Sydney paused thinking whether or not to ask the next question.

Jack could read the expression on her face and knew there was more; she wanted to ask something, "What is it? What do you want to know?"

Sydney was startled her father seemed to be reading her mind but went ahead. She was looking straight into Jack's eyes, knowing it was a painful subject, trying to gauge his reaction. "Dad… did you know… about the baby…t hat Mom was pregnant when she left?"

Jack was quiet a minute, "No… I didn't know… Not until today."

"Apparently, there is a lot we didn't know about her…things she didn't tell us." Sydney was thinking back to all the comments her mother had made about the truth taking time, and wanting to explain her self someday.

Jack had been thinking along the same lines, so much 'he thought he knew' but didn't really have a clue. "I'm almost afraid to find out what else she hasn't told us about."

* * *

-Undisclosed Location-

***Samba de Orly***

"Are you sure you're going to be ok down here by yourself?" Katya leaned against the railing, taking in the beautiful view.

"I'm fine… I can take care of myself… now." Irina quickly corrected herself, knowing that without her sister's help that night, she would have died. She rubbed her hands over the now very visible 'bump' under her shirt. At twenty weeks, she was finally showing to the point where she could no longer hide it.

"Rina, you only have one working arm, you're pregnant and you're restricted to 'light if non-existent activity'…how are you going to take care of yourself?" Katya had pointed out all the obvious reasons why this could be very dangerous.

"I can stay if you want… help you here." She offered sincerely seeing how vulnerable her sister was for the first time in her life.

"No… I need your help, but with something else." Irina spoke softly, but determined. "I need you to take care of some things for me where Jack and Sydney are concerned." She walked back into the house, making her way to the kitchen and Katya followed.

"You want me to shoot him for you." Katya said in a serious tone, but jokingly as she watched Irina grabbing a large chopping knife.

"No." Irina looked Katya in the eye, letting her know she was serious. "I don't want to kill Jack… I've already caused enough pain for them." She looked down quickly, grabbing a mango from the bowl on the table. She tried to cut it with the one arm not in the sling, but the mango kept rolling to the side.

Katya watched her sister struggling to cut the fruit, "And you think you can take care of yourself?" She said sarcastically watching the struggle continue, knowing Irina was frustrated by more then just not being able to cut her own fruit.

At Katya's remark, Irina's eyes flashed in defiance and raised her arm with the knife, slashed it down at incredible speed leaving the mango in two pieces and spinning, she was always good with a knife. She smiled and raised her eyebrows, "Yes…I can take care of myself." She looked at the still unpeeled fruit lying on the cutting board and sighed. "Ok… so maybe I need a little help. Will you please?" She turned her pouting eyes to Katya, who shook her head smiling at the pathetic look. She took the knife from Irina and began peeling the mango for her.

"So what is it that you need me to help you with concerning Jack and Sydney?" Placing the pieces of fruit in a bowl handing them to Irina.

"I'm going to give them their freedom... Jack what he's always wanted…and Sydney what's rightfully hers… We can talk about that later. " Irina walked back onto the veranda, eating her fruit along the way, not wanting to talk about the subject for the moment.

Katya wasn't exactly sure what that meant but followed her sister once again outside. "So why here? What's the catch?" Katya asked looking at the thick luscious jungle around her. "Couldn't be more opposite of Russia if you tried."

"You mean other then the fact that mangos are good and plenty here?" Irina smiled, trying to stifle her laughter with a mouthful of her current favorite fruit. Seeing Katya's look, "It has beautiful beaches, warm weather, quiet when I need it to be, isolated from the rest of the world…has no extradition treaty with the US…" She casually dropped that into the conversation.

"Ah… so that's why you chose here." Katya took a seat next to Irina, picking out a piece of fruit from her sister's bowl.

"Well that and the mangos." Irina smiled a sudden surprise flashing across her face, grabbing Katya's hand and placing it on her stomach, "Feel this…wait…there." She smiled widely at the baby's movement.

"Wow… that's quite a kick for such a tiny baby." Katya marveled at the movement going on inside Irina.

"I almost forgot how amazing this was," Irina smiled moving their hands to another area on her stomach, "She moved… here."

"She?" Katya asked surprised.

"Alexei told me just before we left… I had a feeling she was a girl, everything has been the exact same as it was with Sydney… including the kickboxing moves. When I was pregnant with Sydney, she used to keep me awake at night with her kicking… drove me nuts. If I only knew then those powerful legs would turn into deadly weapons." Her radiant smiling slowly fading when she thought of the once tiny baby she carried inside her, now hunting her down, the thought, tearing Irina apart inside. She had told Sydney their relationship as Mother and Daughter was complicated… what an understatement that had been.

"She sounds amazing."

"Oh she is, Katya… You'll see… she is so beautiful and intelligent…stubborn." Irina couldn't help but smile thinking about how wonderful her daughter turned out.

"Just like her mother."

Irina laughed, Katya was right. "Yes, definitely the stubborn part. Soon after I turned myself over to CIA, Sydney came to me to decode a list of names. I told her I needed a pencil and paper," She smiled, shaking her head, "She said, 'No,' so determined, stubborn...it was hard not to laugh. In that moment I saw the same stubborn little girl who would tell us 'No' so calmly when she didn't want to go to bed. I told her I couldn't decode the names without a pencil and paper, to which she finally relented, breaking the pencil into this tiny piece, so I couldn't use it to stab anyone later I suspect, and this tiny crumpled paper. I could see it in her eyes then, she was trying so hard to keep me at a distance…not that I blame her, the first thing I did after not seeing her for twenty-one years was shoot her." Setting her plate off to the side, pulling her leg up and tucking it under the other, using her one good hand, she began caressing her belly and the active baby beneath.

Katya's eyes, following Irina's movements and resting on the arm, still pinned together and held in a sling. "So… who's going to cut your mangos for you when I leave?" She asked in a serious tone causing Irina to laugh, making Katya smile… each of them realizing just how much they had missed each other.


	9. Chapter 9

_**AN:**_** Music for this chapter (on repeat): ****_All I Want is You_**** by U2****_, and Cosmic Love _****by Florence and The Machine**

* * *

NINE

o

-Los Angeles, CA-

Jack had just finished putting the rest of the files into his briefcase after another exhausting day of going over Irina's files and looking for Sloane.

They had finished early and were all welcoming the weekend. He was just closing the clasp when he saw Sydney approaching with a smile.

Their relationship had ease to it now; more relaxed and far less tense after their talk the other night and he felt bold in taking the next step forward.

"I was just coming to talk to you." He smiled warily with nervousness. "I was going to ask if you… and Vaughn, would like to have dinner with me tonight?"

Sydney was more then a little surprised her father would want to include Vaughn, taking the first step forward in accepting their relationship. "Really?"

"Yes, I thought maybe we could get some take-out delivered to the house…talk about something other then work." Knowing that all of them needed a break and this was his chance to get to know his daughter and her 'boyfriend' outside work.

As much as he hated to admit it, Irina's 'motherly' intuition he mocked, concerning Sydney and Vaughn's unrequited relationship all those months ago on that cargo plane to India, was right on.

There was more there then either of them were willing to admit to then, 'hell' he hadn't been able to see it… but Irina could and he hated it. She'd only been around Sydney for a couple of months and was able to read their daughter better then he was.

"Ok… I'll ask Vaughn." She smiled brightly, kissing Jack on the cheek to his surprise. "Thank you."

Vaughn had accepted, finding appreciation in the gesture Jack had made towards his relationship with Sydney. They had decided to follow Jack straight from work to the house, having a packed bag of comfortable clothes always ready in the car.

* * *

"Vaughn, stop fidgeting." Sydney admonished laughing as she watched the man shifting uncomfortably in the driver's seat as they followed Jack to the house. "You're really nervous." Her gaze softened feeling sorry for him.

"At work, I can handle Jack Bristow… but Jack Bristow the father outside the office kind of freaks me out. I know how protective he is of you."

"Yes, but he's getting better and he did invite us over… so he's trying." Sydney's gaze fell outside to her childhood home as they pulled into the drive next to her father. "Here we are."

"So this is where you grew up. It's beautiful… I never would have pictured this." His gaze falling onto the big house, beautiful even at night.

"Why?" Sydney asked curiously.

"I just never would have pictured a house so storybook perfect when I thought about where it all took place…" His eyes softened looking at Sydney.

"You mean where my mother deceived us?"

Vaughn knew it was an implied question and nodded.

Jack had stopped on the sidewalk, waiting for them to get out of their car.

"We should go." They climbed out of the car and joined Jack.

Jack unlocked the door and ushered them into the dark house. "So what were you thinking about food? Chinese, Italian… maybe Thai?" He asked them in the darkness.

"How about Russian?" Came an unfamiliar voice behind them.

Jack immediately flipped on the light switch.

A beautiful woman sat with her legs crossed in the chair in the living room. Her dark hair and eyes so familiar yet distant, the hint of Russian in her voice... left little doubt as to who she was.

Jack, Sydney and Vaughn remained frozen.

"Hello Jack," She remained sitting; a slight smile as she acknowledged him. "We finally meet. I know this must confuse you as I wasn't exactly invited to the wedding, but allow me to introduce myself, my name is Katya."

"You're my mother's sister." Sydney turned her icy glare to the woman, wondering why she was there…and not her mother.

"Yes." Katya was surprised they knew of her existence. "And you must be my darling niece Sydney…" She could see the fire in Sydney's eyes. "Rina was right. You are more beautiful in person than any photograph could do you justice." She smiled seeing Sydney's reaction to the mention of her mother. "And you," she turned her sights to Vaughn, "must be Michael Vaughn, a pleasure to meet you. Please come sit, I don't bite."

Vaughn was slightly startled this woman knew who he was and looked to Jack, wondering what to do.

Katya once again motioned for them to sit on the couch.

Jack remained where he was, "What do you want?"

Katya could see that her sister wasn't the only stubborn one. "I don't want anything from you. I am here on behalf of my sister…to take care of some matters for her, involving you."

"Where is Irina and why isn't she here? Why would she send you?" Jack was immediately agitated Irina would send her sister to do her dirty work and annoyed she wasn't there so he could talk to her.

"Because she asked nicely." Katya smiled, stalling for time as she thought of how to answer the question. "My sister is 'indisposed' at the moment… I am running things now."

Concern immediately flooded Jack and Sydney's minds, "Indisposed? What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Jack asked venomously.

"Just what I said, 'indisposed.' That's all you need to know." Katya was getting unnerved with all the questions.

"Is she ok?" Sydney was concerned her mother's injuries were somehow more serious then thought, and maybe she wasn't doing well again.

Katya saw the true concern and could see the love behind it and couldn't help but feel for her niece. "Yes… Sweetie, she's ok. She just needs time to herself right now… time to heal." She added quickly, not wanting to raise too many questions as to why Irina needed time to herself. "Please, sit down and I'll explain why I am here."

Sydney was a little stunned by the 'Sweetie' comment from her aunt but grateful that her mother was ok. She made the bold move, feeling somehow she could trust this woman a little, and moved to sit on the couch… Jack and Vaughn followed nervously.

"What do you mean Irina's healing?" Jack asked trying to mask his concern with a stern tone.

Katya, however, could see through it. "You surprise me with your concern for my sister, Jack. Especially after being the one to cause the 'damage." She cocked her head to one side trying to gauge his reaction.

Jack remained silent, staring intently at the woman who reminded him of Irina.

"Well… part of the damage anyway." Katya lightened up on the man, seeing she had struck a nerve. "But to answer your question…her wounds were serious and she needs more time to heal. And I am running things obviously, because she is in no condition to protect herself at the moment."

"Then why would she risk coming to the US like she did if she was in no condition to protect herself." Jack was upset for many reasons.

"She didn't come here, come to 'you!' To pick a fight!" Katya's intense stare made the three uncomfortable and Jack once again had to swallow the lump rising in his throat at Katya's reference to the fact that Irina had 'come to him' not looking for a fight. Katya was hit with a sudden urge to protect and defend her sister. "She came to talk to you… but things have changed now. Look, I didn't come here to fight with you either." She reached over the arm of the chair and pulled a file from the black leather case they now realized was there. She pulled some papers from the file and handed them to Sydney. "This is for you, she wants you to have it."

***All I Want Is You***

Sydney took the papers and scanned them, trying to understand what they were all about. She recognized the legal paper work as a transfer of funds from Irina to Sydney though a Swiss bank account. "I don't want my mother's mafia money." She shoved the papers back at Katya, refusing to read the rest, angry with her mother for the gesture. It wasn't her mother's money that she wanted…

"It's not money from the organization. All of that gets funneled back into Russia through charity organizations and such for the people. This money is family money. Your mother set up a trust fund for you almost twenty years ago after she reacquired our family's funds, this is part that money." Katya shoved the paper across the coffee table back at Sydney.

"What do you mean reacquired?" Vaughn spoke for the first time since they'd arrived, all of them having an idea but wanting it confirmed.

"I assume that because you know of me, you know who I am. Who Irina is?"

"You're Romanovs." Vaughn swallowed uncomfortably under the woman's stare.

"Yes… our grandfather was Nicholas… our mother Anya, was his youngest daughter Anastasia and the only survivor of the massacre, making her the sole inheritor of the family fortune and would-be heir to the throne. But of course, at that time, the fact that she survived could not be revealed and she had to go into hiding. The Romanov' money and power were stolen by the new government who'd killed our family. Irina used her organization to regain the power our family lost and to find our family's inheritance, covertly of course… only a few key people knowing who she really is. Through her organization she was able to regain control over the Russian government and use the funds that were obtained illegally, to help our people by giving it back through charity with food programs and hospitals, clinics, schools, scholarships, etc. The point being Sydney, this is your money as the daughter of the 'heir apparent' to the throne of Russia. She wants you to have it… to be happy and safe…to make the most of your life."

Sydney picked up the file and looked at it once again and noticed for the first time the amount. "Oh my God…" she gasped quietly, "I can't accept this much money."

"$150 million!" Vaughn practically shouted seeing the amount.

"Sydney, accept it." Katya looked at Jack, "Don't be stubborn like your parents."

Jack sat motionless in the chair at the other end of the room.

"This isn't your inheritance of course, that will come later…I'm sure you know that money doesn't make you happy, you have to do that for yourself…but it does make life more comfortable so enjoy it. And Jack," She reached into the file once again handing him a document. "This is your freedom. Sign on the line and your marriage to Rina will be over, like it never happened, with the exception of Sydney of course." Katya once again sat back to watch the interaction and reactions of the three in the room.

Jack looked helplessly at the annulment papers in his hand. His thumb brushing over Irina's signature…signed just four days ago.

"You're still married to Mom?" Sydney couldn't believe it. Her father had never said anything. "How is that possible?"

"Technicalities." Jack sighed thinking back to the day Irina reminded him they might still be married. He'd never actually pursued any action even after that conversation.

"Is that all?" Katya quirked her eyebrow at him in the same way Irina and Sydney did. She could see the hesitation on Jack's part. "No rush…" she replied smoothly, "Just drop, them at your lawyers when you've signed them." She once again reached into the file. "This is also for you. She said to think of it as 'compensation." She handed Jack the papers. They were legal money transactions similar to the ones given to Sydney. "Irina told me how you'd always wanted to buy a boat and sail through Sydney Harbor…now you can."

Jack's eyes immediately darted up to meet Katya's. Sailing thru Sydney Harbor and along the Gold Coast had always been 'their' dream…since the very first trip he and Irina made there together the year they got engaged. It was where Sydney's name came from. He couldn't understand Irina's actions here. "I don't want Irina's money! I don't want any 'compensation'…" Jack angrily threw the papers on the table, "I want to talk to her! Tell her, I want to talk to her!"

"Jack, that's not possible." Katya leaned back into the chair shaking her head.

"Hell if it's not possible! She was just here of few weeks ago!" Jack stood and started pacing in front of the group.

"Things are different now." Katya remembered the look on Irina's face the night she left this very same house.

"Just tell her that I want to talk to her."

"But she doesn't want to talk to you or see you ever again!" Katya rose furiously out of the chair, causing alarm to the rest of the group, as they didn't know what to expect with her outrage. "It's all about you, you, you, you! You don't have any idea what she went through for you, what she's sacrificed, or anyone else, do you? I'm so sick of it being all about you! Jack, you weren't the only one who had your life destroyed by Irina's mission." The battle was raging inside her, trying to keep her emotions in control and not burst into tears.

"I know…" Jack's hard gaze softened.

Katya was startled by Jack's admission, unsure if he 'really' understood. "What do you mean, 'you know?' If you did, I highly doubt you would have treated my sister like you did the other night, even with everything she's done to you!"

"I didn't know then." Jack gulped, at the realization Katya knew how he'd acted towards Irina.

"I know now. We've seen her file… we've seen the film. I know what she did for us, and what that cost her." Jack sighed and sat on the arm of the chair. "What that cost you… your mother. I know you must despise me for that."

"You know about my mother?" Katya relaxed, her tone softening as well. She looked from Jack to the couch where Sydney and Vaughn were still sitting, Sydney will fresh tears in her eyes.

"Yes." Sydney choked out. "We know she was executed because my mother refused to leave us, refused to kill my father."

Katya sank back into the chair, her body suddenly seeming very heavy. She took a deep breath, trying to keep her emotions together before she began again. "Yes, I did despise you." Her eyes met Jack's "And I despised my sister for years." Katya looked at her hands ashamed for her actions and feelings towards her sister, now. Hands in her lap, she began rubbing the back of one hand with the other's thumb; a trait that seemed to belong to the Derevko women when they were upset.

Jack wasn't surprised to hear she despised him but her use of the past tense did, meaning she didn't despise him anymore? He remained silent seeing that she had more to say and curious about Irina's sister's reaction to the 'mission.'

Sydney had always been interested in the interaction between her parents and seeing her father interact with her mother's sister, was just about as interesting.

"I'm not a spy… I've never been into anything like that." She stood from her seat and began pacing the floor as Jack had done earlier. "I was fifteen years old when Irina left for the U.S. Until that point, we had been inseparable. Our lives had been so guarded and restricted because of 'who' we were. I understood her need to have independence and get out, because I'd wanted the same thing." She paused, unsure why she was telling them this. Maybe because she felt they could empathize with her better then anyone and she needed to get this off her chest. "I was hurt and angry when she left, not because of what she was doing, but because I missed her terribly. Ten years later she was supposed to return, and I was ecstatic…but she refused. She didn't want to 'come home.' I couldn't understand her and then when they killed our mother…I didn't want to. As far as I was concerned…she was a traitor." Katya whirled around to face Jack. Staring intently into his eyes. "She'd fallen in love with the enemy."

Jack could feel the pressure his conscience was squeezing into his heart. No matter what Irina did in the situation, there was no way to 'not' hurt someone and in the end everyone came out feeling betrayed… 'Especially Irina.' He thought.

"By choosing you, I thought she had betrayed us all; our family, our country…everyone…but especially me. I was jealous and spiteful and didn't care what happened to her." She turned once again from Jack's gaze, too ashamed to make eye contact with anything but the floor. "I'd heard they'd taken her to a KGB prison when she finally did return…but at that time, I didn't care. Time went by and I would hear stories from people with KGB connections about what was happening to her…" Katya's eyes began to glisten with the tears forming there. She looked up to see Sydney's eyes looked much the same. "I started thinking about everything and the fact that even my mother could forgive her in her final moments, understanding why Irina didn't want to leave. From the very first film she sent back, our mother could see it… see that Irina had fallen in love with you." Her gaze went back to Jack. "And it terrified her. I used to hear her talking to my father about it late at night… How worried she was for my sister and the effect it would have on her someday leaving… terrified the KGB would find out and what they would do to her. Her concern only worsening after Sydney was born even though she was thrilled to have a grandchild, even one she could only see through photos and film."

"My mother used to send you photos?" Sydney asked through a crackly voice and tears. Amazed at how much she hadn't known.

"Yes… Rina used to send us photos and films of her life with you," her gaze shifting between Sydney and Jack, "a couple of times a year. At the time, I didn't want to think about it…what my parents had been concerned about. Looking back, I began to realize what an impossible situation it was for my sister and I was ashamed of myself. Even after I heard of Irina's release…I was too ashamed, too proud to find her and tell her I didn't blame her; that I forgave her. I'd hear about things she was doing or had done through our various connections, trying to keep tabs on her and I knew she'd been keeping tabs on me, taking care of me, but we never saw each other or spoke… that all changed a couple of months ago. I would do anything for my sister…anything to make her happy and keep her safe. Which is why I am here tonight." She blinked back the tears and once again reached inside her black case, handing Sydney a disk.

"What is this?" Sydney took the black disk and turned it over, looking for a clue as to what is was.

"This is everything Irina knows about Rambaldi and also a list of contacts she's worked with who might be able to give you information. Also, everything she has on Gerard Cuvee and this man named Sloane is on there as well. Hopefully, it will help you."

"Why is she giving us this?" Vaughn asked confused as to why Irina Derevko was once again helping them.

"She wants to help you. That's it… that's all." Katya smiled and reached over picking up her bag.

"Wait! You're leaving!" Sydney rose off the couch quickly, panicked. "I have questions about my mother…I need to talk to her, to see her!"

"It's too risky… for both of you. She doesn't want to be in another situation where you have to face off against each other again."

"So what does that mean?" Sydney's heart started racing at the thought. "That I'll never see her again?"

"She will always love you. Never doubt that Sydney." Katya answered quietly, true sadness in her eyes as she looked at her distraught niece.

"What? I don't understand!" Tears began to trickle down Sydney's cheek again.

"This is Irina's 'goodbye,' isn't it?" Jack swallowed hard, realization finally hitting him. "We're never going to see or speak to her again, are we?"

Katya's empathetic look and silence spoke volumes.

"No!" Sydney breathed defiantly. "She can't. Not now…not when we finally know the truth."

"I wish it didn't have to be this way." Katya turned her gaze away from Sydney, remembering the same pained expression on Irina's face when she told her of this plan.

"It doesn't." Jack's own heart began to race at the thought of never seeing Irina again and having his final words to her, be as they were.

"Jack, for your sakes'… for my sister's sake… I wish you would have heard her out when she was here, given her a second chance."

Jack felt Sydney and Vaughn's eyes on him.

"You are hurt and angry with her, and you can't get passed that…that much she told me. I wish with my whole heart… I really do, that things were different. But they're not. You still work for the CIA and she is still a wanted fugitive here. She doesn't blame you… honestly, she doesn't. She accepts how you feel about her. She wants you to be happy."

Jack was finding it hard to breathe. He had Irina believing he'd hated her, used her for betraying him; that she was nothing but a whore… And she'd accepted it as the truth. 'Nothing, at this point, could be further from the truth.' She still had the power to infuriate him and he hated her for that. It was always a love/hate relationship with them. He wasn't going to let her do this…breeze back into their lives and wreck havoc again, stir up all these feelings and then vanish again. "And you think we're just going to accept this, let you leave here?" Jack felt the anger rising inside him.

"Irina told me you wouldn't be reasonable." Katya stepped back from the chair and nodded. Three men in black suits who'd been waiting on stand-bye, rushed into the room from all directions; each aiming a gun at someone different.

"I should have expected this… you are related to Irina." Jack seethed looking at Katya and the men with the guns. The men fired simultaneously at Jack, Sydney and Vaughn. The tranquilizer darts sending a wave of nausea through them all…these were potent.

Vaughn and Sydney fell back on the couch and Jack into the chair…all of them fighting to stay awake.

"It was a pleasure, finally meeting you. And I really do, wish it could have been under different circumstances." She walked towards the door and their droopy eyes followed her. "Oh…and Mr. Vaughn… you really do look just like your father. He was just as handsome." She smiled.

Vaughn's eyes remained fixed on the woman slowly turning into a blur. "You knew my father?" He slurred out surprised.

There was no answer, only the black sleep of his unconscious.

* * *

-Undisclosed Location-

***Cosmic Love***

Irina had fallen into a comfortable rhythm in her new surroundings, though her mind was with the ones she loved on the other side of the world. Breaking all contact with them, again, was something she never thought she was going to have to survive once more.

With tears in her eyes, she shifted her weight in the hammock chair, leaning back and resting her good arm on top of her belly. Her hand caressing the kicking baby within, reminding her she wasn't alone. She had hoped in time she would be able to tell them the truth and somehow, it would all be ok…that she would regain Sydney's love…and Jack's. But the truth didn't matter. She had been foolish to think it would. Foolish to think any explanation she gave could erase the hatred they felt for her and heal the wounds she had caused.

The baby had been doing well and the rest over the last month had given her time to 'catch up.' She was likely to remain a little smaller then average until her birth, but the doctors were far less concerned now and gave Irina the 'go-ahead' on getting out and moving around more if she felt up to it. She spent the days walking on the beach and relaxing in the sun, reading… One of the things she loved the most and rarely had time for in the last few years.

It was the night that brought the loneliness. She fell asleep countless times looking at old photographs and home movies. She kept copies of them in all of her houses, something to make them feel more like 'home.' She had been to the doctor twice since Katya had left, once for the baby and once for her hand and chest. Because she was still 'High-Risk,' they had continued to due sonograms every visit. This last visit was the first 4D sonogram she'd ever had and seeing the baby in such great detail brought forth a wave of emotion. She and Jack's features were easily recognizable on their sweet baby's face. She'd made copies of them all and framed one, putting it next to her photograph of Sydney on her nightstand, and put the others on the fridge…something she thought 'normal' parents would do.

It brought a smile to her face every time she opened the fridge to get more mango, remembering Jack's concern that Sydney would be born orange, from the copious amounts of mangoes she was consuming while pregnant.

Irina smiled, watching her tanned belly bounce with every fierce kick of the baby. "I suppose I should get up and feed you," she sighed, moving to get out the chair and finding it difficult with her expanding belly and the use of only one arm. "Don't tell your aunt, but I can't wait until she returns and I can have her wait on me. Then we'd never have to leave this chair."

"I heard that." Katya smiled at the far end of the veranda, holding a bowl of freshly cut mangoes. "And I'm already ahead of you on the mangoes, so stay put."

"You're back." Irina smiled settling back against the chair. "And you read my mind." She took the bowl of fruit Katya handed her. "Thank you."

"I figured you'd be hungry this time of day." Katya smiled settling into the chair next to Irina; exhausted from the last couple of weeks events. After her time the US, she had headed back to Russia to take care of some things before returning to Irina. "Wow, I can't believe how big you've gotten in two weeks time. Is that possible?" She marveled Irina's exposed belly.

"I know; its crazy isn't it?" Irina glanced from side to side, admiring the new girth of her abdomen. "All she needed was for me to slow down, I guess. Did you see the new pictures?" She beamed proudly taking another bite of her delicious fruit.

"Yes, cute as hell. I can't believe how detailed it is. She's so darn cute… must take after me." She laughed.

"If that's the case then I'm really in trouble." Irina smiled back.

"Oh yes, because we know I'm the one who's so much trouble." Katya laughed. "Speaking of trouble, what did they say about your hand?" She glanced over and looked at the mess of metal still protruding from Irina's hand.

"Well, they're going to take some of the pins out in a couple of weeks so that's good. He thinks I am going to need at least two more surgeries to repair the tendons and ligaments and at least one more to attempt to repair the nerve damage. It's a wait and see thing." She sighed, a small smile grazing her lips as she looked at her nervous sister.

"And your checkup? How's your chest wound healing?" Katya kept prodding; concerned Irina might be leaving something out.

"Good. No strenuous activity until the tear in the artery has had more time to heal, but that I already knew. Not like I could anyway, being pregnant." She took one last bite of fruit and set the bowl off to the side. "Besides, I am kind of enjoying this lounging around on the beach thing."

"Yes, I can see. Nice tan." Katya smiled at her sister's new dark complexion. "So that's what you've been up to since I left…lounging all day on the beach." She joked with Irina; glad her sister was actually listening to the doctors and slowing down.

"No. Not all day." Irina laughed. "I did manage to go shopping some." Seeing the stern look Katya was giving her she added, "Before you lecture me, I was given the 'ok' to move around more and get out. I had to get some different clothes, mine were too hot for the weather here and getting a little too snug."

"Ah huh." Katya nodded, "So who cut your mangoes for you?" She asked seriously causing Irina to laugh.

"Plenty of good looking men around here volunteered." Irina raised her eyes suggestively causing Katya to laugh.

"Yeah, I noticed."

"Well, I can do it now. Without wearing the sling all the time but the first week, I asked Lourdes, the sweet little lady next door who comes to clean…if she wouldn't mind cutting some up for me. She happily obliged. She's really sweet and I think; she likes 'taking care of me.' Her daughter moved to the US last year with her grandchildren and she misses them terribly. She checks on me at least once a day." Irina's smile faded.

"She thinks I'm this helpless, damaged, pregnant woman whose husband and daughter died in an accident."

"You told her your husband died?" Katya was surprised. "And Sydney?"

"Well Jack might as well be dead as far as I'm concerned. He's no longer apart of my life." Her fingers grazing the scar the bullet left, stretching across her expanding belly. "And I had to say the same for Sydney… Lourdes had seen the pictures of her when she was cleaning. Besides, people ask less questions when you're the grieving widow and they leave me alone."

"Speaking of your 'not so dead' husband and daughter," Katya began slowly, knowing this wasn't going to go well, "They didn't take it so well."

"They were upset. I expected that…at least from Sydney anyway." Irina sighed, moving to stand.

Katya saw her struggle and gave her a hand to steady herself. Irina walked to the railing and looked out at the beautiful ocean, enjoying the light breeze on her face.

"She's hurt… I understand. But as Jack pointed out to me once, she spent the better part of her life without me, believing I was dead… she will get used to the idea of life without me again." Irina couldn't stop the ache in her heart for her daughter, but remembering this was better for Sydney...safer for her, without Irina bringing more trouble into her life.

"I don't know if that's possible, Rina," Katya was unsure of how to approach this new information, "They know the truth."

Irina whirled around, fire in her eyes. "You told them about the baby?" She was furious her sister had betrayed her trust.

"No!" Katya rose from her chair and placed her hand reassuringly on her sister's arm. "I would never betray your trust like that. They don't know about the baby."

Irina breathed a sigh of relief, feeling guilty she jumped to conclusions but still confused about 'the truth.' "Then what 'truth' are you talking about?"

"The 'truth,' Rina." She stared intently into her sister's dark eyes, hoping she would see what that meant. "All of it. They just found your 'real' KGB file… and the films from Kashmir… the film of Mama's execution… They know everything."

Tears immediately springing to Irina's eyes, "Oh God no!" She turned away from Katya, once again staring out into the endless sea. Her mind suddenly racing with horrible images from prison, horrified at the thought Jack, and especially Sydney, had seen them. "What did they say?" She choked out. Afraid to look Katya in the eye… afraid she'd see the horror there.

"Well they were upset obviously… Jack said he knows now, what you did for them… what that cost you… He wants to talk to you… to see you-"

Irina interrupted, "That's impossible now."

"I told them that. But, Rina," She placed her hand over her sister's, wanting her to look at her, "Why is that impossible? They know the truth now… isn't that what you wanted?"

"Yes… but no! I wanted them to know the truth but I never intended them to find out or see what happened in Kashmir… Jack must be furious at me…finding out about the baby I lost that way. God, he must hate me more then ever now…seeing I'm nothing but a weak dirty whore… I could never face them again." Tears rolling down her cheeks, trying desperately to keep from sobbing.

"Rina, that wasn't your fault… you didn't do anything wrong! You were trying to protect them and you're not weak…you're not a whore! How could you say that? Where is this coming from?" Katya was getting angry at the thought and tears welling in her eyes as well. She couldn't believe her strong, beautiful sister thought so little of her self.

"It's true, Katya, I was weak… I lost our baby, I let them ravage me…I gave up and let them win. In the end I gave myself to Cuvee again and again just so I could get out of there. I am what they say... a whore." She wiped the tears from her eyes, still refusing to look at Katya.

"No!" Katya shouted, grabbing Irina by the arms forcing her to look at her, "You're not! You are the strongest person I know. You did what you had to. You survived…you didn't let them beat you." She was crying too and pulled Irina into her, hugging her close to her body as possible. Irina gave in and wrapped her arms around her sister, needing the closeness just as badly.

"I love you." Katya kissed the side of Irina's cheek, wet with tear trails. "So much," and continued holding onto her.

"Thank you." Irina whispered into Katya's ear. "And I love you, too... forever and always."


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat): ****_Volare_**** by The Gypsy Kings, ****_How to Save a Life _****by The Fray****_, The Reason_**** by Hoobastank, ****_Mother of a Mother_**** by Michael Giacchino from ****_The ALIAS Soundtrack 'Irina's Theme._****'**

* * *

TEN

o

It had been two weeks since the encounter with Katya and everyone was growing restless. The information Irina had provided proved to be legitimate, bringing down quite a number of top terrorists around the globe. The Intel they, in turn provided, suggested Sloane and Cuvee had recovered and were beginning to reorganize looking for Irina had become their top priority.

The actual phrase that came across in the Intel was, 'The hunt is on' and the thought sent chills down Jack's spine. Especially now, since they had finished decoding the Rambaldi pages Sydney had stolen from Cuvee. The pages had proclaimed that Rambaldi would be reborn from the life-blood of 'The Chosen One,' creating the perfect unity and fulfilling the Prophecy. What that actually meant, know one knew for certain.

The one thing Jack did know for certain, Irina was in terrible danger. Normally, she could take care of herself, but according to Katya, she was in no condition to do that. The thought of Cuvee finding her and what he would do to her; scared the hell out of Jack now, after seeing the Kashmir files.

He shook his head, trying to rid the horrible images he was conjuring up there. He reached into his briefcase and pulled out the annulment papers, his thumb grazing over Irina's signature once more. He still couldn't bring himself to sign them, not yet anyway. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Sydney and Vaughn approaching and he quickly shoved the papers back into his case.

Sydney had been working endlessly on any clues that might lead her to any information on her mother's whereabouts, determined not to let Irina disappear on her again. She'd spent countless hours questioning Sark for anything he might know, and in the end gained nothing.

Vaughn's enthusiasm for finding Irina matched that in Jack and Sydney's, after hearing Katya's comments suggesting she too, knew his father. 'Why and how', the questions that wouldn't let him sleep at night.

"Sydney, Vaughn," Jack greeted them calmly, seeing the troubled looks on their faces, "What's going on?"

"Kendall's called a briefing, he says it has something to do with Mom." Sydney crossed her arms over her chest, feeling suddenly insecure. "We're supposed to meet in the briefing room now."

"Ok," Jack rose slowly out of his chair, worried about what they were about to learn, "Did he say what?"

"No, he just said to get you and be in there in five."

Jack nodded and they headed for the briefing room.

"As most of you know," Kendall began looking around the room, "Irina Derevko escaped US custody and has been successfully eluding recapture for the past six months. Today, we hope to change that." Giving an almost sympathetic look to Jack and Sydney. "For the past five weeks, agents have been working undercover tracking a known arms dealer, Antonio Santiago, across South America. One week ago, Santiago checked into a hospital in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil for an infection in his lung."

"What does this have to do with my mother?" Sydney interrupted, growing impatient with this news.

"Everything." Kendall hit the Play button and video surveillance from the hospitals exterior began to play. "Yesterday morning Santiago was released," Santiago could be seen leaving the hospital and getting into a waiting car. "Not surprising. What was surprising to the agents, was the person who walked out the door just a minute after, Irina Derevko."

Irina could be seen exiting the hospital, though her stomach concealed by a large blue shopping bag hanging over her right shoulder. She paused momentarily on the curb, waiting for her ride and then climbed into the backseat of a black Mercedes sedan. Kendall backed up the footage and froze it on Irina as she stood on the curb.

"How we do we know where she is or if she's even still there?" Sydney asked quickly, her eyes never leaving the image of her mother on the screen. She was panicked at the thought Irina might once again have slipped through their fingers and concerned about the fact that her mother was spotted leaving a hospital. Irina had crossed her arm over the other and the injured hand could plainly be seen on the screen. Sydney couldn't tear her eyes away from the pins protruding from the skin.

Jack, on the other hand, felt his pulse quickening at the sight of a very tan Irina in a strapless white sundress and high heels, her hair dancing around her shoulders as she looked for the car. She was still the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.

"The agents tracked the car to this house," Kendall changed the image to a photo of a gorgeous house on the beach, backed up against the jungle-covered mountains. "It appears to be Derevko's and according to sources, she's been there a little over a month."

"She could be on the move soon, we can't waste anytime." Jack's pulse racing now, at the thought she might slip away again.

"I know, I'm sending in a Delta team tonight."

"No!" Jack shouted, knowing Irina had a Shoot To Kill order still on her and the Delta team wouldn't hesitate to use it. He realized his outburst and gathered himself, calmly explaining, "Sending in a Delta team is too risky, she could be alerted to their presence and slip through our fingers once again. I suggest that I go and take Sydney, Agent Vaughn, and Agent Weiss for backup. Alone I am less likely to be spotted and Irina has come to me before wanting to talk and sent her sister to give us information. I have a better chance of getting close to her." He hoped his argument sounded convincing.

"Jack, she's bound to have a substantial security force, how are you going to deal with them if things don't go as smoothly as you plan? I can't afford to lose Derevko again or you as an agent if she captures or kills you." Kendall shifted his weight and crossed his arms, his eyes narrowing in on Jack.

"I won't be alone, I'll have backup if needed… and we won't let Irina get away."

"She's gotten away from you three times before-"

Jack interrupted seeing where this was going, "She won't get away again."

"Fine." Kendall gave in. "Take those three with you, Jack you're in charge. Don't make me sorry I listened to you. You leave in three hours." He handed Jack the file with the Intel the agents had gathered and stormed out to the room.

Eyeing Jack and Sydney through the glass of the briefing room he sat heavily in his chair. Finally he picked up the phone, "Yeah…it's Kendall. Get me the Delta team leader."

* * *

-Rio de Janeiro, Brazil-

It had been a long hot day, and Irina welcomed the cool breeze that nightfall brought. Katya had left two days earlier, needing to take care of some things in Russia that could only be dealt with in person. She had planned to be back by the end of the week. Irina couldn't wait, she was enjoying her newfound closeness with her sister again and was getting used to the idea of having her around. Talking and laughing with Katya was helping to keep her sane. She had been in an incredibly good mood all day; the doctor's visit yesterday had been uplifting and she was getting excited about the baby's impending arrival.

She put a couple of her favorite CDs into the player and hit the 'Random' button. She could feel the baby start kicking and flipping around inside her as the music began to play. 'She' already loved music as much as her mother.

***Volare' ***

Irina danced her way into the kitchen singing along with the Gipsy King's 'Volare.' She stopped to check how much time was left on the banana cake she was baking in the oven, the smell intoxicatingly good and filling the house. It still had about ten minutes left and she was too hungry to wait. She stopped to smile at the new images of her baby on the fridge, her hand instantly going to rest on her belly.

Reaching inside she grabbed a juice, and shut the door with her foot. She picked up a mango and knife and began slicing when she felt a sudden chill run down her spine. She looked up at a security monitor that was hanging in the corner and scanned each block, looking for any movement. She sighed seeing nothing, feeling herself relax and thinking she was being paranoid and that's when she saw them… the knife falling from her hand as she bolted for the patio door.

Jack had been canvassing the area around Irina's house with his night vision goggles when he heard shots ringing out followed by a command of,

_"Go! Go! Go!"_

He whipped his head up to see men dressed in black repelling from the roof and crashing through the windows, it was the Delta team. "Son-of-a-bitch!" He seethed watching the men ambush the house.

"What's going on?" Sydney asked running up behind him followed by Weiss and Vaughn.

"Kendall." Jack answered without taking his eyes off the house.

"But you told him not to!" He could hear the panic creeping into Sydney's voice.

"He must have changed his mind."

"I'm going in." Sydney began creeping through the jungle towards the house.

"Sydney!" He yelled after her. Realizing she wasn't stopping, he grabbed his gun and motioned for the other two men to follow.

By the time they caught up with Sydney she was already at the base of the house. Shouts of "Clear!" Could be heard coming from various rooms of the house.

"She's not here. She was tipped off… looks like we just missed her." A younger man informed another man, Jack could only presume was the Team Leader.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Jack screamed at the man, charging through the broken sliding glass doors of the downstairs patio.

"My job, Agent Bristow." He glared at Jack; leaning into the Com on his shoulder, "Clear out of the house. Check the area, she couldn't have gotten far." He turned his attention back to Jack, "Kendall didn't think you'd be able to bring her in on your own."

"This is my Op! I don't care what your orders are. I am the Senior Officer here and I am demanding you leave now!" Jack stepped closer to the man, his face turning red with anger.

"We've scanned the immediate area, sir… she's not here but we'll keep looking," a young man burst through the door.

"Don't bother," The Team Leader replied turning his attention back to Jack, "She's gone already. Go ahead and the men to clear out Puetz." He stepped around Jack and exited the house through the broken doors.

"What is that smell?" Weiss asked sniffing into the air.

"Shhh!" Vaughn motioned, "What is that noise?"

They quieted for a moment.

"It's music." Weiss added turning towards the stairs.

"That's not what I'm talking about. Don't you hear it? Sounds like a buzzer."

They cautiously made their way up the stairs.

"Something smells good." Weiss sniffed again.

"Shhh!" Vaughn once again shushed him.

"What? I'm hungry. Stop with the 'shushing' already."

The sound grew louder as they approached the kitchen.

"It's the oven timer." Jacked sighed and they split up scanning the rooms downstairs.

"Wow… she can cook too? She really is impressive."

"Weiss, enough already! She shot you remember! You almost died." Vaughn was getting unnerved by the entire situation and upset that Irina had disappeared yet again.

"Of course I remember almost dying… but she didn't actually shoot me remember… it was the screwdriver." Weiss walked to the kitchen and shut the timer buzzer off and the oven.

"Enough. Scan the house for any clues that might tell us where she went to." Jack barked walking around the living room. He noticed Sydney transfixed on the other side of the room, staring intently at a frame in her hand.

"Sydney, what is it?" Jack walked closer to her.

"It's a picture of us… Mom and me on my sixth birthday." Her' fingers grazing the smiling faces. She gently placed the photo back on the table next to the other photos of Sydney at various ages.

"This is weird." Vaughn picked up a prescription bottle sitting on the coffee table.

"What is it?" Sydney moved swiftly towards Vaughn. He handed her the bottle.

"Folic acid for Nikola Bristow." She read causing Jack's eyes to widen. "Must be the alias she's using."

Jack swallowed hard at the fact Irina had used Bristow as her alias.

"I've never seen so many mangoes in all my life." Weiss gazed around the kitchen at the baskets of fruit everywhere. Picking up a slice that Irina had just cut from the cutting board, earning another glare from Jack and Vaughn. He ignored their looks and popped another piece in his mouth."She must really like mangoes."

"She loves mangoes." Jack looked helplessly at the fruit and then at Sydney. "I couldn't buy enough of them for her when she was pregnant with you." A small smile crept across his face at sharing the memory with Sydney.

"So while we're searching for clues…can we eat this banana cake, it smells really good." Weiss bent over looking into the oven.

"Oh my god…" Sydney gasped walking up behind Weiss.

"What? I'm just hungry that's all." He closed the door quickly, turning to look at Sydney.

Her gaze transfixed at the images on the fridge. "Folic acid." She could hardly breath, putting it together in her head. "Mangoes… She's pregnant!" She gasped pulling the sonogram images from the fridge, staring intently at the incredible images of the baby.

"What? Are you sure?" Vaughn moved quickly to Sydney's side, looking at the photos.

"It says Baby Bristow… mother Nikola Bristow… they were taken yesterday." She stood frozen, her mind racing.

Jack was frozen, unable to move unable to breathe. Realizing now, what Katya had really meant in regards to Irina being 'indisposed.' She had deceived them once again, the thought of her pregnant with another man's child sickening him. The fact she was using his last name made it worse. 'No wonder she wants an annulment,' His heart torn between anger and sadness.

"Wow… that is incredible… it's a perfect baby. I've never seen anything like this." Weiss glanced over Sydney's shoulder.

"It says she was twenty-five weeks yesterday." Sydney looked up to meet Jack's eyes, seeing the sadness there. She handed him the photos and slowly he took them, his chest instantly tightening at seeing the beautiful baby curled up and sleeping so sweetly inside Irina.

"Twenty-five weeks?" Vaughn calculated in his head. "How is that possible?" He looked around the room at the bewildered faces. "Twenty-five weeks, six months ago… she was in US custody… She was in our custody."

"Twenty-five weeks from yesterday…is," Sydney calculated in her head stunned by Vaughn's realization. "That's like February 13th or 14th, right?"

Jack's face suddenly grew pale at the calculation Sydney was making, his eyes wide in shock.

"She was with you! In Panama… the passive tracker… you slept with her!" Sydney's eyes grew wide at her realization. "It's your baby…"

Jack felt as though a ton of bricks had just landed on him, sucking the breath right out of him. He couldn't deny it. Before, he would have tried to rationalize the thought, 'it' could have just as easily been Sloane's, she did escape with him the very next day… but knowing what he did about Irina now, and staring at the sweet little face in the pictures, there was no denying he was the father. He could make out his own features in the baby and his heart sank.

Just moments ago he was internally berating Irina at the thought she had gotten pregnant with another man's child, all the time he was feeling sorry for misjudging her, jumping to conclusions that would always make her the 'wrong' party… He was the wrong party. He was angry with Irina for not telling him they were going to have another baby but then… she had tried. He understood now, why Irina had come to him… took the risk just to talk with him… Why she looked so hurt and angry at his words… Why Katya had said she'd wished he 'would have just listened to Irina', and why Irina had refused to see him or Sydney now. "Yes…" He finally answered forcing himself to look at Sydney, "I was with your mother in Panama."

"She was a prisoner!" Vaughn spat out angrily.

"She's also my wife!" Jack shouted back, feeling defensive about his actions.

"She was in your custody… what were you thinking?"

"I don't feel the need to explain myself to you Agent Vaughn." Jack tried to control his anger.

"I think you do!" Vaughn stepped forward in anger at the thought of Jack sleeping with his father's killer. "I knew there was more you weren't telling us about Panama!"

"I had my reasons!" Jack took a step towards Vaughn.

"That's why she came to your house… you said you were fighting about Panama!"

Sydney saw this situation quickly getting out of control stepped between them. "Look, this is getting us nowhere. I don't understand and I don't want to think about it right now, although Mom's comment about her 'love for you and your father not being a contrivance' suddenly makes more sense, as does your dodging of Marshall's questions about how you planted the passive tracker on Mom." She shook her head stepping back, not wanting to think about 'how' that was planted. "The point is we have to find her now more the ever." She sighed looking at Jack, "She's actually having a baby." She felt her eyes getting a little misty. "I can't believe she's still pregnant… in Tuscany… I shot her! She jumped off a skyscraper… and everything that happened to her in Russia with Sloane and Cuvee… Dad, you shot her in the abdomen… I don't know how she didn't miscarry… it's a miracle."

The men in the room remained silent, contemplating Sydney's words.

Jack feeling especially guilty that he'd almost killed Irina and their unborn child, even if he didn't know. Guilt was strange that way, didn't matter if you 'should' feel it or not…there was no reasoning with guilt...

"We need to split up and start looking for any and everything concerning Mom and her whereabouts. This is not the time or place to get into this." Sydney was once again taking control of the situation.

The team split up and began rummaging around the house. Jack and Sydney took the upstairs while Vaughn and Weiss searched the lower levels.

Jack stumbled upon what he could only presume to be Irina's room.

***How To Save A Life***

The large room was lit by the moonlight cascading through an open balcony and it looked beautiful. Clean and white with a gorgeous four-post wooden bed draped in delicate mosquito net, centered against the far wall. He took a step inside and seeing a lamp on the nightstand, walked over and turned it on; the light immediately illuminating the two, framed photos residing there. Jack sat heavily on the bed, reaching to pick up the first photo.

It was a fairly recent picture of Sydney in the park, and was a close-up taken from a telephoto lens no doubt…Sydney was smiling brightly at someone…Vaughn, he guessed, though no other person could be seen. She looked incredibly happy and beautiful. With the other hand he hesitantly picked up the photo of his 'other' child, so perfect and small, still growing inside Irina. He marveled at the detail he could see in the baby. Perfect little eyebrows and Irina's nose and lips…his chin. The baby's hand had been curled tightly against their sweet little face, just the way a newborn would sleep. He wondered if Irina knew the sex of the baby, though it didn't matter…the baby was absolutely perfect one-way or the other, just like Sydney.

"Dad…" Sydney had stepped into the room without Jack's notice. "Are you ok?" She asked lightly, seeing her father sitting on the bed.

"Yeah…" He smiled as she took a seat next to him, taking one of the photos from him and staring at the other.

"Where'd you get these?" She asked scanning the photos.

"They were here, on your mother's nightstand." He motioned with his head. Sydney couldn't contain the surprise she felt at yet another realization of just how much her mother cared about her. She glanced back down at the photo of the baby.

"I can't believe it… a baby." She sighed with a small smile. "It's just unbelievable… all this time she's been pregnant."

Jack stood, suddenly uncomfortable with the thought…'all this time.'

Sydney placed the frames back on the nightstand and looked around the room. The moonlight catching another frame on different dresser just right, getting her attention. It was a smaller frame with four separate photographs; all of Katya and Irina.

The top two photographs had been taken when they were little girls, five and six, Sydney guessed, both photos taken at the same time. They were sitting on a garden bench in front of rundown mansion, with infectious smiles and rag-tag clothes.

In the first photo Katya and Irina had their arms wrapped around each other's necks, leaning their heads into one another, laughing.

The second, Katya was pulling Irina's head down to her and kissing her temple. It was the first picture Sydney had ever seen of her mother as a little girl.

The bottom two photographs, identical in pose and place except they had been taken recently…Irina's arm still in a sling, confirming the fact. The infectious smiles were still there, though Sydney could see the hint of sadness in her mother's eyes.

"Dad…" Sydney turned to Jack. He saw the frame in her hand and walked slowly to where she was standing, taking the frame from her. "Do you recognize where they are? It has to be somewhere in Russia if Mom and Katya were there when they were little too."

Jack remained silent, nodding he agreed, but continued to study the photographs… seeing 'Irina' as a child for the first time too. He smiled at the photos of the sisters, happy to see Irina was smiling when they'd been taken, though he could see her sadness as well.

Vaughn and Weiss made their way into the room, each carrying something.

"What did you guys find?" Sydney moved to inspect their findings.

"Well I found this," Weiss held up an ammo belt and gun holster, "on top of this." In his other hand he held up the book, What To Expect When You're Expecting. "Only in the home of Irina Derevko." He raised his eyebrows at Sydney causing her to crack a smile.

Vaughn walked to the bed and set a medium sized box down. "I just found this… what did you find?"

"Nothing really… maybe something I don't know… do you recognize this place?" Sydney handed the frame containing photos of Irina and Katya to Vaughn. "Its somewhere in Russia but we don't know where. Wherever it is, my mother might have gone there. She seems connected to it somehow."

"It's the garden at Alexander Palace outside St. Petersburg." He looked up, shocked. "I recognize it from the photos Marshall found on your grandmother… it was the Romanov's favorite home, especially your grandmother's." He handed the frame back to Sydney.

"You're right… I didn't even think about that. I still can't get used to the idea that my mother is... royalty." She sighed looking again at the photographs. "What's in the box?"

"I didn't really look at it, just brought it up here after I opened it. Looks like burned DVDs, some letters… and photographs of you when you're little." He smiled sadly, as Sydney opened the box.

Sydney removed the DVD cases, setting them aside and froze at seeing her name written on an envelope. Slowly she removed it, unsure if she should open it… feeling as though she would somehow be violating her mother's privacy… the thought absurd, as they were in the middle of ransacking her house looking for information. "I don't know if I should open it…" She looked to her father hoping to find an answer. Jack nodded slowly that she should and Sydney took a seat on the bed, preparing herself for whatever was written inside. She removed the letter from the envelope carefully.

It was written in English, and it looked like a poem, not a far-fetched idea, as Irina had once been an English Literature Professor at UCLA.

With the paper shaking in her hand, Sydney began to read it quietly out loud.

***The Reason ***

_'Sydney, _

_Today, I told you of my plans to deceive the CIA and that I'd changed my mind and wanted to give you everything I knew. You didn't believe me said I was 'insane,' for suddenly wanting to give it all up. You couldn't understand my reasons but the reason is you…_

_The Reason~_

_I'm not a perfect person_

_There's many things I wish I didn't do…_

_But I continue learning_

_I never meant to do those things to you…_

_And so I have to say before I go,_

_That I just want you to know…_

_I found a reason for me…_

_To change who I used to be…_

_A reason to start over new_

_And the reason is you…_

_I'm sorry that I hurt you,_

_It's something I must live with everyday._

_And all the pain I put you through_

_I wish that I could take it all away,_

_And be the one who catches all your tears…'_

Sydney couldn't stop the tears rolling down her cheeks and used the back of her hand to wipe them away as she tried to finish reading it.

_'That's why I need you to hear_

_I've found a reason for me…_

_To change who I used to be_

_A reason to start over new_

_And the reason is you_

_And the reason is you_

_And the reason is you_

_And the reason is you_

_I'm not a perfect person_

_I never meant to do those things to you_

_And so I have to say before I go…'_

Sydney's voice began to crack and angrily wiped the tears and her nose.

_'That I just want you to know_

_I've found a reason for me_

_To change who I use to be_

_A reason to start over new_

_And the reason is you…_

_I found a reason to show_

_A side of me you didn't know_

_A reason for all that I do…_

_And the reason is you…'_

Sydney paused, trying to control a sob threatening to escape…

_'I love you to the moon and back…more then the stars in the heavens and grains of sand on Earth… forever and always, Sydney' _

No one said anything as Sydney collected herself, folding the letter and placing it back in the envelope. She set it aside and reached once again into the box pulling out another letter with

'Jack' scrawled across it. She handed it slowly to her father, who continued to stare at the writing, still moved by what Irina had written about Sydney.

Noticing they were waiting for him to read it, he stuffed it inside his vest, unwilling to read whatever Irina had written, in front of others, especially after the letter she'd written to Sydney… He couldn't imagine what this was going to say and felt it should be read in private.

Sydney took the hint and reached back into the box removing a small stack of photographs. The first few were of Sydney when she was little, taken with her mother and some with her father.

There were pictures of Jack alone and with Irina and Sydney… others were from Irina's childhood with Katya. Sydney continued to flip through the stack of photographs smiling at seeing new photos of her mother. Sydney flipped the last picture over and froze, all expression leaving her face. She recognized the circumstances surrounding the photo. It had been taken the same day, same place as the surveillance photos of her mother in the park on October 1st, 1970 with the man they knew only from the photo's inscription as Mikhail Vontonavich.

***Mother of a Mother ***

This photo was unlike the others in the fact that is had been taken knowingly… The man and Irina both facing the camera, smiling like a happy couple posing for a snapshot, with Irina sitting between the man's legs, his arms wrapped around her upper body, his face nuzzled down in the crook of her neck, resting his head against hers; her arms wrapped over his.

Sydney felt her chest tightening as she stared at the photo.

"Sydney, what is it?" Vaughn asked immediately concerned at seeing her face losing its color.

She looked up slowly meeting Vaughn's eyes with sadness and then to her father. "It's the man in the park with my mother, the one who tried to escape with her and was killed… Mikhail Vontonavich." She tried to swallow the massive lump in her throat finding it difficult, as it was so dry.

"What about him?" Vaughn asked again, seeing the tears welling in her eyes.

"Vaughn… it's your father." Looking at Vaughn, then at her father and Weiss's surprised faces.

* * *

**AN: So...anyone out there reading this? Enjoying? Wanting to more? **


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat): ****_I Surrender_**** by Celine Dion,****_ All Water_**** by Perfume Genius,****_ Clair de_**** Lune by Claude DeBussy,****_ What a Wonderful_**** World by Louis Armstrong,****_ Goodbyes _****By Celine Dion**

* * *

ELEVEN

o

"That's impossible." Vaughn grabbed the photo from Sydney's hand; all color leaving his face the moment he saw his own reflection staring back, holding a very beautiful, very young, Irina Derevko in his arms. His mind once again going into denial mode at the implications this suggested. "It can't be him. It's just impossible." He shoved the photo back at Sydney angrily and began pacing the floor.

"Vaughn, he looks just like you." Sydney passed the photo to Jack, who took a seat on the bed next to her.

"No! It's impossible Sydney. That photo was taken in Russia on October 1st, 1970…this man died escaping a KGB prison camp…my father" He stumbled to find his words, "She killed my father!" His voice starting to waiver with his anger and the emotions he was desperately trying to control. His reaction bringing tears to Sydney's eyes at seeing Vaughn so upset, knowing what 'this' felt like.

"Vaughn…looks aside…think about it. Mikhail Vontonavich… Michael Vaughn," She stood going to his side, "Vaughn, it's practically the same. And my mother's reaction to you…saving your life."

He turned away from her but she grabbed his arm, refusing to let him go. "Vaughn please… think about it. I know it doesn't all make sense but it explains Katya's comment…Vaughn, she said you looked just like your father… How else would she know that unless she knew him?"

Jack looked helplessly at the photo in his hand, feeling once again as though his world was blowing up in front of him. He didn't know how many more 'revelations' into Irina's life he could take without having a heart attack. "Vaughn, I met your father for the first time in December of 1970 at Langley when we had a special training session. The man I met that day…" Jack swallowed looking up to meet Vaughn's eyes. "Is the same man in this photograph."

"No. It can't be him… My father was murdered by, 'your' mother, when I was eight years old. I've seen the records, I went to his funeral!" Vaughn pulled away from Sydney.

"And I went to my mother's!" She shouted back.

"What is that supposed to mean?!"

"Vaughn, if the KGB could fake my mother's death… they could've faked your father's."

"You're suggesting my father was KGB… a double agent? That's ridiculous."

"It's possible…"

"No! He was not a traitor. My father was an honorable man. A good husband… a loving father… he would do anything for us."

"And my mother was a good wife and loving mother who 'did do everything for us'… but she was still a spy for the KGB. Think about it… there was never really any explanation given as to 'why' my mother would kill your father other then the fact she was KGB and he was CIA."

Vaughn felt the tears brimming in his eyes, resignation finally setting in. "But the orders to kill him are in her file." He sighed and sat heavily in the chair next to the bed.

"Actually, the file said she was to 'remove him' as he was becoming a risk. Vaughn, it's possible removing him actually meant faking his death for extraction." Sydney kneeled in front of him, holding his hands in hers.

"But they identified his body with the dental records." He was exhausting ever possible way out of this reality.

"Which can easily be switched…and would explain why the body was damaged beyond recognition…it wasn't him." Jack sighed, handing the photo back to Vaughn.

"The last mission he went on, the one where he was killed…he kept telling me before hand that he didn't want to go…didn't want to leave me… But if this is all true…he just left us. It was all a lie." The tears overflowing onto Vaughn's cheeks as he looked at the photo of his father with Irina.

"I know what you're going through right now. Finding out who my mother really was…devastated me, you know that," Sydney cried, wiping the tears falling from Vaughn's eyes instead of her own. "I'd put her on this pedestal my whole life, idolizing everything about her and when I found out she was KGB…I assumed the worst about her…that she never loved me and didn't care about leaving us, but, Vaughn," She tilted his chin up to look into her eyes, "I was wrong… She loved us and left only because she had to in order to save our lives. I'm sure your father loved you just as much and he meant what he said on that last mission…that he didn't want to leave you. I'm sure that's why he gave you his watch before he left, so you'd remember how much he loved you."

"The watch." Vaughn looked intently at the photograph, recognizing it instantly clutched in his father's hand…wrapping paper lying across Irina's lap. "She gave it to him." He gasped at the realization. He pulled the shirt up on his arm and began removing the watch that had been residing there.

"I thought it didn't work anymore?" Sydney asked, watching Vaughn's frenzied removal of the device.

"It doesn't. I wear it on Ops for good luck. Sydney…remember what I told you… that this watch stopped working the day I met you…"

"October 1st…" Sydney began realizing where he was going with this.

"Yes… and your mother gave this watch to my father on October 1st…"

"Ok… that's a little freaky but I don't get it." Weiss finally spoke.

"You don't think its odd that a watch my mother gave his father on October 1st suddenly stops working on the exact same day Vaughn and I meet?" Sydney took the watch from Vaughn, inspecting it and seeing nothing unusual.

"Yeah, like a said freaky… but I still don't get where you're going with this."

"Let me see it." Jack asked waving his hand in a come hither motion for Sydney to give him the watch. "Did you ever take it in… try and have the battery replaced?" He inspected the watch.

"No… it's a wind-up and I just figured it was dead."

"Well there's a slot to open it in the back." Jack tried to open it but failed, as his fingernails weren't long enough to grab hold of the tiny rim.

"Let me try." Sydney took the watch and with one try, opened it. "There's an engraving inside…" She looked Vaughn in the eye, "It's written in Cyrillic."

"What does it say?"

"Be still my heart when true love finds you. With Love, Irina- October 1st, 1970"

"He said I could set my heart by this watch." Vaughn squeezed Sydney's hand. "So I guess it's true…my father was most likely a double agent for the KGB."

"And if that's true… my mother didn't kill your father." Sydney began seeing a little ray of hope in all this madness. Her mother may not be responsible for the death of Vaughn's father after all.

"And he died escaping prison instead." Vaughn sighed sadly.

* * *

Staring out the window of the transport plane taking them back to Los Angeles, Jack's mind once again raced with images of Irina and yet another one of her great escapes. Secretly, he was thrilled she hadn't been captured by the Delta team; knowing now she was pregnant, hoping she was all right wherever she fled to. He reached into his vest and pulled out the sonogram photos that had been on the fridge and the letter from the box. Staring at the baby he couldn't help but smile.

One night together in over twenty years, and they managed to make another baby, the thought of getting Irina pregnant that night, never crossing his mind. Not that they were too old, they were only fifty…well he was fifty, she was only forty-seven as they learned from her file…but it'd been twenty-seven years since Sydney was born and most people didn't have babies at this age. 'Most people.' He chuckled at the thought. He and Irina were anything but like 'most people.' Why should they start trying to be now? He glanced over his shoulder to see Vaughn staring out the window, deep in thought no doubt, after the revelation of his father tonight, and Sydney staring at the letter her mother had written, just like she had been for the past four hours. He looked back at the letter in his own hand. His thumb brushed over his name written so beautifully on the front. Just as nervous as Sydney had been, he hesitantly turned it over and lifted the flap, sliding the letter out.

Taking a deep breath, he unfolded the paper and began reading to himself.

'_My Dearest Jack, _

_I had to write this down on paper, I had to get it out…it's been swimming around my head for so long, it's consuming my every thought. It began as a fear and became my saving grace while I was in solitary, now that I'm free… I have to let it go, as I have to let you go._

_So many nights I'd lie awake, watching you sleep, wanting so badly to tell you who I really am, wanting to surrender to you to live a life without fear without deceit.'_

**_*I Surrender*_**

_'But telling you the truth was impossible, the fear for your life, our children's haunting my every move. My worst fears were realized when they did find out but thinking of you, is what got me through…_

_I Surrender~_

_There's so much life_

_I've left to live_

_And this fires burning still_

_When I watch you look at me_

_I think I could find the will_

_To stand_

_For every dream_

_And forsake this solid ground_

_And give up this fear within_

_Of what would happen if they ever knew…_

_That I am in love with you…'_

Jack felt his heart begin to race at Irina's confession that she'd been terrified of the KGB finding out she had fallen in love with him…

_'Cuz I'd surrender everything_

_To feel the chance to live again_

_I reach to you_

_I know you can feel it too_

_We'd make it through_

_A thousand dreams I still believe_

_I'd make you give them all to me_

_I'd hold you in my arms and never let go_

_I surrender_

_I know_

_I can't survive_

_Another night away from you_

_You're the reason I go on_

_And now I need to live the truth_

_Right now there's no better time_

_From this fear I will break free_

_And I live again with love_

_And no they can't take that away from me_

_And they will see_

_I'd surrender everything_

_To feel the chance to live again_

_'Cuz I'll surrender everything_

_To feel the chance to live again_

_I reach to you_

_I know you can feel it too_

_We'd make it through_

_A thousand dreams I still believe_

_I'll make you give them all to me_

_I'll hold you in my arms and never let go_

_I surrender_

_Every night_

_Getting longer_

_And this fires' getting stronger_

_I'll swallow my pride and I'll be alive_

_Can't you hear my call…_

_I surrender'_

He saw the images of Irina's torture and subsequent confinement in solitary racing through his mind as she talked about swallowing her pride so she would live… hearing her once again crying out his name to come save her.

_'Right here_

_Right now_

_I'll give my life to live again_

_I'll break free_

_Take me_

_My everything_

_I surrender all to you_

_Right now_

_I give my life to live again_

_I give my life_

_Take me_

_My everything_

_I surrender all to you_

_I'll give my life to you…'_

He blinked back the tears and folded the letter again, placing it inside his vest once more, feeling as though it was burning through the material, straight to his heart. They needed to talk and this time he would listen. He needed to stop making an ass of himself with all his assumptions about Irina and her motives, as time and time again… the truth revealed they'd all been wrong.

* * *

-Los Angeles, CA-

The four of them had left the airport and went straight to Ops, with Jack leading the charge to find Kendall.

Kendall saw the foursome approaching and the fury in Jack's eyes. "Jack." He tried to greet the man, attempting to give an explanation but was cut off.

"You son-of-a-bitch!" Jack seethed at the man.

"Now wait a minute… you don't have the right to address me like that!"

Jack let the comment go in one ear and out the other as he continued with his tirade. "You went behind me back and sent in the Delta team before we got there."

"They were supposed to be your backup in case you let Derevko slip away again. They weren't supposed to go in before you."

"But they did, because you sent them and now we've lost Irina again! Why would deliberately go behind my back?" Jack was getting more then a little pissed with the man.

"Because Irina Derevko, whether you like to admit it or not, was your wife and every decision you've made around her hasn't been made with the most rational train of thought in mind. You are one of the best agents I have but when it comes to Derevko, your judgment is blurred. I wanted to believe you could do the job but I needed insurance in case you didn't…you ought to be familiar with this notion," He shifted his weight in a dominance stance, "Planting a passive tracker on Irina in Panama as your own insurance."

Jack's mind quickly flashed back to the moment he'd inserted the tracker into Irina's breast in the thralls of their passion, using his teeth as a distraction. The image sent a surge of heat through his body remembering the sensation. It also reminded him of that 'little something else' he'd implanted in Irina that night that was now taking precedent over everything else. "You're right, I didn't trust Irina's motives which is why I 'went to the trouble' of planting the tracker." Jack decided to play this cool, turning his lust into duty. "You need to rescind the Shoot To Kill Order on Irina." Jack stated calmly, looking dead serious into the eyes of Kendall.

"Why?"

"Because it's not just her life we'd be taking anymore!" Jack reached inside his jacket pocket and handed the sonogram photos to Kendall. "She's pregnant."

"What?" Kendall gasped looking down and the images in his hand, "How far along?"

"Almost twenty-six weeks and before you do the math…" He could see Kendall calculating mentally, "I'm the father..."

Kendall's eyes shot up from the photos and this time it was Jack who saw the fury behind them.

Jack didn't give him time to respond before answering the questions he knew he was about to be asked. "It happened in Panama… the result of planting the tracker." Jack's eyes remained focused on Kendall, who darted his eyes away from Jack at the thought, wanting to look convincing and also avoiding Sydney's reaction. "And no, I didn't know about the baby until we found these."

"I could bring you up on charges." Kendall glared at Jack, knowing he wouldn't really do it but presented it as a threat anyway.

"I was doing my job, just like she had done hers." Jack's face remained stoic.

Everyone knew exactly the reference he was making, though Kendall doubted highly that Jack's night with Irina was just chance for revenge. Not believing for a second that Jack had to make any sacrifices in the name of duty by sleeping with the beautiful Irina Derevko. Though he did have to commend the man for having the balls to climb into bed with a woman who'd killed men beyond recognition."How can you be certain you're the father?" Kendall asked a little more softly.

"I'm certain." Jack maintained his resolve, believing in Irina more then he ever thought possible before, for once giving her the benefit of the doubt. "I have to believe that's why she risked coming to my house that night… She was going to tell me about the baby."

"Well this certainly puts us in a hell of a position, Jack." Kendall shook his head handing him back the photos.

"So you'll rescind the order?" Sydney asked hopefully, speaking up for the first time in the conversation.

"Yes… at least for now. That woman's just one damn surprise after another."

"Speaking of surprises…" Jack glanced back at Vaughn, who looked like hell from lack of sleep. "We uncovered yet another secret in Irina's past that turns everything we thought we knew about her, upside down once again." Jack placed his briefcase on the desk and opened the KGB file on Irina to the pages containing the photos of Irina with the identified, yet unseen, man named Mikhail Vontonavich. He handed the pages to Kendall, tapping his finger on the photo as he spoke. "This man, identified here with Irina in 1970 as Mikhail Vontonavich, was also the same man," Jack flipped the pages to the information they'd decoded about Irina's time in Kashmir, "That made the escape attempt from the KGB prison with Irina in 1982 and made it but died from injuries." Jack added softly stealing a look at Vaughn, feeling for the young man much as he did for Sydney when she learned the truth about her mother.

"Yes, we've already gone over this. Where are you going with this, Jack?"

"We've got reason to believe that this man, Mikhail Vontonavich, was a double–agent for the KGB…working inside the CIA under the alias… William Vaughn."

Kendall whipped his head up, eyes wide. "What? Where'd did you get that idea…" his eyes racing back and forth between Jack and Vaughn.

Jack reached into the briefcase and handed the photo of Vaughn's father and Irina, to Kendall.

"God damn it…" He cursed under his breath as he stared at the photo.

"We found it in Irina's things. It was taken October 1st, 1970 in Russia… the same day as these surveillance photos."

"I can't believe this." Kendall stammered still shaking his head, the realization of it all sinking in. "If William Vaughn really was Mikhail Vontonavich… that means Derevko didn't kill him, if he was the man who tried to escape in Kashmir with her."

"No…" Jack sighed, "William Vaughn's death was most likely staged, like Irina's, in order to extract him. How he ended up in the KGB prison, I have no idea."

"Get Marshall," Kendall ordered Weiss, "I want him to scan the faces of the prisoners in the footage of Irina's time in Kashmir, see if we can't get an ID on him there. I need to call Devlin, set up a special committee to investigate William Vaughn."

"I want to be on it." Vaughn finally spoke.

"Absolutely not." Kendall closed the file abruptly, softening his gaze at seeing Vaughn's distress. "You are to stay out of this, you understand? I want you to go home, get some sleep… you people look like hell." He could see how devastated Vaughn was from the news and understood why; the 'kid' had worshipped his Dad.

"It's 7:30 in the morning." Vaughn protested.

"I don't care. Go home!" He ordered. "I'll page you if we need you. All of you… Go!"

* * *

**_*All Water*_**

They reluctantly went home and passed out from their exhaustion.

Sydney awoke with the feeling that someone was watching her. Lying on her side, she opened her eyes and found Vaughn staring at her. "Did you get any sleep?" She inched her face closer to his

"Yeah." He offered her a small smile. "I just woke up a few minutes ago."

"It's gonna' be ok." She whispered back seeing the sadness in his eyes. "We're going to get through this…together."

He reached up and tucked her hair behind her ear, leaning in to place a light kiss on her lips.

Just then, they heard the unmistakable sound of their beepers going off.

"Kendall." They said in unison, jumping out of the bed.

They met Jack at the entrance, and found Kendall hovered over Marshall's computer while Weiss and Dixon joined them.

"What have you got?" Jack asked peering over Marshall, instantly horrified at seeing the images of Irina being tortured on the screen again.

"Oh God..." Sydney gasped, her reaction much the same as her father's, though this time quite a few heads popped up from the surrounding computers to see what all the commotion was about.

"We should take this in the briefing room." Kendall interjected and the group followed.

Once behind the privacy of closed doors, Marshall began his explanation of his findings. "I was scanning the footage, trying hard not to think about … well the torturing of your… I had to turn the sound off… anyway, concentrating on the prisoners and using the positive ID system… we've found a match. I'm sorry…" He gulped looking sadly at Vaughn. He pushed Play and the scenes of the prisoners shaking their bars and reaching out in front of the passing camera rolled by. "This time… concentrating on just the prisoners… I saw him right away… he was the only one not cheering." He paused on a dangerously skinny man with scraggly hair, standing silently by the bars. His face had been turned just enough, you couldn't get a full view of him but as the camera panned back… his face could clearly be seen. Through sunken cheeks and hollow eyes, the face of William Vaughn was recognizable. "The computer confirmed it. He can be seen many times actually. Here's the best one."

They watched as the film played on and the camera came surprisingly close to his face, Marshall paused it. Tears were visible making their way down Vaughn's father's face as he watched them beat and rape Irina, while the other prisoners went crazy with enjoyment.

"He was KGB…" Vaughn breathed into the silence of the room. His anger could be seen rising within him.

"Um," Marshall began hesitantly looking cautiously around the table, "As I was looking at the footage, I got to thinking… that your mom," He looked to Sydney, "Well… all this time everyone's thought she killed Vaughn's father… but, but obviously she didn't… because he was actually KGB and in prison before she got there…" He was really rambling now, "So… so I got to thinking… that maybe some of the other CIA Officers she… she supposedly killed… weren't really dead either. So I," He swallowed hard, "I just randomly… ah, started scanning the other prisoners for a possible match with some of the agents that had been killed."

Everyone sat on pins and needles waiting for Marshall to hurry up and tell them.

"And!" Kendall prodded him along.

"And… I found a match… on two other prisoners. Agent Craig Wessley and Agent David Markson." He pushed Play and paused on the two 'supposedly murdered' CIA Officer behind bars at the KGB prison, as the stunned faces watched the screen.

Jack rested his head in his hands and began rubbing his temples, feeling a sudden pressure building inside his head.

"Son-of-a-bitch," Kendall leaned back in his chair staring at the screen. "They had us completely infiltrated." He let out a big sigh turning his attention to the two children of at least two of the KGB infiltrators, and then to Marshall. "Good work Marshall." He nodded his approval. "Dixon, I want you to pull all the files of the agents Irina Derevko supposedly killed… we're going to have to start a new investigation into them all… have them on my desk in an hour, I'll take them to Devlin. The rest of you… see you tomorrow." Kendall stormed out of the room, followed by Dixon and Marshall. Jack, Vaughn and Sydney remained, still mulling over the new information.

"What are you going to tell your mom?" Sydney asked quietly, taking hold of Vaughn's hand.

"Nothing." Vaughn replied quickly, turning his attention from Jack to Sydney, "At least not until I talk to your mother."

Marshall returned carrying the box they had taken from Irina's. "I almost forgot; we checked the disks… their ok. No information… just old home movies and some composite slideshows. Mostly of your family." He tried to offer a slight smile, realizing what a 'family' it was. "Really good actually… I got a little misty eyed watching them." Seeing Jack's expressionless face staring he turned his attention to Sydney. "You were a really cute little girl." He raised his eyebrows smiling. "Ah here." He set the box on the table and said 'Goodnight.'

"So we'll pick up some Chinese and we'll meet you at the house." Sydney looked at her father, seeing him staring intently at the box.

"Syd… I don't think I should be there to watch these with you." Vaughn said lightly looking at Jack. "This is a family thing."

"Vaughn, please." She didn't bother to look at Jack's reaction, wanting to have Vaughn there for support. "You're family to me." She smiled and squeezed his hand.

"Ok." He returned the smile.

Jack grabbed the box and set out for home.

* * *

When they finished dinner, eaten mostly in silence, Sydney grabbed the box and moved into the living room. While she busied herself with the DVDs, Jack poured himself some Vodka, downing one, before pouring another preparing himself for the assault of memories he knew was coming. He offered a glass to Sydney and Vaughn, which he accepted and she declined. Jack took a seat in the chair as Sydney nestled into the couch next to Vaughn and hit Play.

_***Clair de Lune***_

As the first image faded into view, Claude Debussy's 'Clair de Lune' could easily be recognized being played on a piano.

A little girl, with long wavy dark hair, sat on a piano bench, her back to the camera. She looked so small sitting in front of the big grand piano, her feet barely touching the pedals.

The person holding the camera went to the side and focused on the two little hands dancing feverishly away on the keys. As the camera moved up, you realized she was playing from memory.

Sydney had to smile at the concentrated look on her mother's face as she played the song, paying no attention to the camera. "She's amazing… she can't be more then eight or nine years old."

Jack's mind suddenly flashing back to Irina at their own piano, now collecting dust in the far room, playing the same tune. He was always amazed at her musical genius.

The footage faded to black as the music continued to play. Footage of beautiful woman, Anastasia they'd guessed, with a striking resemblance of Irina today, was smiling madly as she held the tiny new baby, bundled tightly in her arms. They appeared to be standing in Red Square in front of St. Basil's Cathedral on a bright sunny day in the middle of winter. Irina had the same spiky Mohawk that Sydney had as a baby.

The camera was passed off to someone and Irina's father joined his wife and child, kissing baby Irina softly on her head, beaming proudly as any new father would.

In the next part a tiny Irina could be seen toddling towards the camera in a garden surrounded by gorgeous flowers. Her cute little chubby baby arms reaching for whomever, was filming. In the same garden, sitting on a white blanket, Irina, a little older, was kissing the baby lying next her… Katya.

It went on to show the girls at the beach at the Black Sea, and ice-skating in Leningrad Park. Irina with her hair in two tight little buns, dressed in her school uniform on what looked to be her first day of school. Doing ballet in front of frosted glass window. There was footage of Irina blowing out her candles on her sixth birthday and screaming madly with delight as she opened her gift of _Alice In Wonderland_; the same First Edition copy she'd given to Sydney on her sixth birthday.

Vaughn's attention was drawn to the older boy, maybe nine or ten years old standing off to the side. "Wait! Pause it!" He shouted, grabbing for the remote. As the boy turned to face the camera again Vaughn pressed Pause. "Oh my god… that's my father."

The little boy smiling at the camera could just as easily have been a picture of Vaughn when he was a child the resemblance was so strong.

"He knew your mother since she was at least six years old." Vaughn sighed folding his hands together and resting his chin on them as he leaned forward. They weren't just agents in the KGB together, they were friends… childhood friends.

Sydney and Jack remained silent knowing Vaughn was still dealing with shock of finding out who is father really was and worried the young man might implode at any moment.

The film of Irina's childhood continued to roll by with images of her riding a horse and fishing with her father. There were also plenty of images of she and Katya being silly; dressing up in their mother's clothes as all little girls do.

Sydney remembered doing the same with her mother's. Vaughn's father appeared occasionally, playing games with Irina and Katya.

Around the age of twelve or thirteen, Irina could be seen participating in various children's athletic teams the Soviet Union used to put children and teens into to begin testing them for their skills and placement. She was a member of the swim team and looked all too cute in her red swimsuit and swim cap, her smile disarming even then. She continued with ballet and was also a member of the rowing and track teams. Every one of her uniforms was the same red, white, and gold with the symbol of the Soviet Union blazoned somewhere on it.

At about thirteen, her looks began to change from a beautiful girl to a gorgeous young woman.

Her graduation from the KGB Academy had Jack holding his breath, as it wasn't too long after that she came to the US and met him. Irina could be seen in uniform, in tears hugging her mother, who had just given her a gift.

"The earrings." Sydney whispered seeing the box in her hand and remembering the story her mother had told her. Irina hadn't lied to her about them.

The film once again faded to black and faded into the image of a sixteen year old Irina playing the same tune and right on cue. She was stunning and looked exactly the way Jack remembered her from the first moment he saw her. As she finished playing, tears could be seen rolling down her cheeks. Her mother came and sat silently beside her on the bench until she finished. Irina leaned into her, resting her head on her mother's shoulder, while Anya rested her head against Irina's… tears in her eyes as well. The film faded to black.

They all realized it was probably the last day Irina saw her family before moving to the US for her mission with Jack. Sydney grabbed a Kleenex and pushed play for the next DVD.

_***What A Wonderful World***_

Louis Armstrong's "What A Wonderful World" began to play as grainy footage of a very pregnant Irina twisted around on a swing. She was smiling and laughing and Jack felt his heartstrings tug, remembering the day well. He had just gone out and bought their first 8mm camera, feeling they were going to need one, as they were about to become parents. He had been saying all kinds of ridiculous things to her to get her to smile at him behind the camera.

The next segment was of Irina, lying on her side in bed as a very newborn Sydney lay sprawled out next to her, punching her little hands and feet into the air as she slept causing Irina to smile and laugh.

Then it was a shirtless Jack lying in the hammock in their backyard with a sleeping baby Sydney on his chest, his hand protectively covering her back.

Sydney had never seen his smile so radiant then in the image before her and she braved a quick glance at her father now to catch him with a small smile on his face.

Sydney's 'firsts' began to roll by one by one, first smile, laugh, crawling, birthday, and steps into Irina's arms where she caught Sydney and spun her around laughing and crying at the same time in delight. She pulled Sydney to her chest and kissed her sweet baby cheek and neck as Sydney wrapped her tiny arms around her. There were clips of the entire family posing together at family picnics and running through sprinklers in the hot summer sun, her father smiling and laughing the entire time he was getting soaked. Sydney and Irina were seen together reading books and baking cookies, playing the piano.

Sydney and Vaughn burst out laughing as they watched a five year old Sydney giving Jack a make-over with make-up and all, Irina was obviously laughing as well because the camera started to shake with her.

Jack finally gave in and chuckled along with them seeing him self in rollers and a very serious Sydney applying lipstick all over his lips.

Jack and Sydney could be seen building sandcastles at the beach, and running away from the waves…falling into the sand in fits of laughter.

The last image as the song ended was from their last trip to the beach before Irina left. Sydney was perched on top of Jack's shoulders as he hung onto her ankles with one hand. He pulled Irina in next to him with his other arm. They smiled and waved to the camera before turning to walk down the beach hand in hand, into the setting sun… fading to black.

Emily Sloane had been the one behind the camera that day and Jack felt a sudden wave of sadness for the fallen woman remembering happier days with the 'Sloanes.'

Vaughn had to admit, they looked every bit the happy family… just like he remembered with his own before his father's 'death.'

Sydney grabbed another tissue and blew her nose as the tears continued to fall. She pushed Play on the last DVD as she snuggled in closer to Vaughn.

_***Goodbyes ***_

The screen remained black as the music began to play. The distinct voice of Celine Dion could be heard but Sydney didn't recognize the song.

Images of a very pregnant, Anastasia, 'Anya,' faded into the screen followed by photos of a newborn Irina with her mother and various other pictures of them together throughout the years.

_'Mamma you gave life to me_

_Turned a baby into a lady_

_And mamma…_

_All you had to offer_

_Was a promise of a lifetime of love…_

_Now I know there is no other love like a mother's_

_Love for her child_

_And I know_

_That love so complete someday must leave_

_Must say goodbye_

_Goodbye's the saddest word I'll ever hear_

_Goodbye's the last time I will hold you near_

_Someday you'll say that word and I will cry_

_It'll break my heart to hear you say goodbye_

_Mamma you gave love to me_

_Turned a young one into a woman_

_And mamma all I ever needed_

_Was a guarantee of you loving me_

_Images of Irina with a newborn Sydney began playing chronicling their time together._

_'Cause I know_

_There is no other_

_Love like a mother's love for her child_

_And it hurts so_

_That something so strong_

_Someday will be gone, must say goodbye_

_Goodbye's the saddest word I'll ever hear_

_Goodbye's the last time I will hold you near_

_Someday you'll say that word and I will cry_

_It'll break my heart to hear you say goodbye…_

_But the love you gave will always live_

The images changed to random pictures of Anya, Irina, and Sydney at various ages in their lives, including photos of Sydney that had been taken, after Irina had left well into college.

_You'll always be there every time I fall_

_You are to me the greatest love of all_

_You take my weakness and you make me strong_

_And I will always love you 'til forever comes_

_And when you need me_

_I'll be there for you always_

_I'll be there all life through_

_I'll be there this I promise you_

_I'll be your beacon through the darkest night_

_I'll be the wings that guide your broken flight_

_I'll be your shelter through the raging storms_

_And I will love you 'till forever comes_

_Goodbye's the saddest word I'll ever hear_

_Goodbye's the last time I will hold you near_

_Someday you'll say that word and I will cry_

_It'll break my heart to hear you say goodbye_

_'Till we meet again..._

_Until then..._

_Goodbye…_

The last two images were of Irina hugging her mother's neck from behind, what must have been her departure for the US and of a six year old Sydney hugging her mother the same way, that day on the beach.

Sydney could barely breathe as the tears overflowed from her eyes. She could see now exactly how much Irina loved her…and hear how much it hurt her losing her mother and daughter.

Jack too felt the tears welling in his eyes watching the images and hearing the song, his heart breaking watching Sydney's reaction at the realization of the depth of love her mother had for her. "Enough of this finding out the truth second hand…" He stood from the chair, blinking back his tears with a new determination. "We're going to St. Petersburg… tonight!" He looked at a startled Vaughn and Sydney as he made the call to Kendall.

It didn't take Sydney but two seconds to jump off the couch and start preparing.

They'd seen quite a bit of the Alexander Palace in Irina's films and photographs and with the recent photo they found in Rio of her there… he could only hope that's where she would be. If not her, at least Katya… someone/anyone who could help them find Irina. He'd told Kendall they'd gotten a lead, but said nothing more as they didn't want compromise their chance to speak with Irina.


	12. Chapter 12

_**AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat): **__**Say**_** by John Mayer, _Sorrow_ by The National**

* * *

TWELVE

o

-St. Petersburg, Russia-

They arrived in St. Petersburg the following night and by the time they gotten to the palace, it was nearly midnight. The cab pulled up and dropped them off at the front gate and two burly looking guards stepped forward, stopping any further advancement.

"Halt!" They shouted in Russian, guns aimed and ready to fire. "The palace is closed." The bigger of the two stepped forward, still aiming his gun at Jack. "Leave!" He shouted.

Two more guards appeared on the other side of the gate. Deciding this was getting them nowhere Jack gave in. "Alright… alright. We'll come back tomorrow."

The disapproving look from Sydney not lost on him but pulled her back none-the-less.

After walking down the road a bit, and out of earshot, Sydney let him have it. "Come back tomorrow? I don't want to wait until tomorrow!"

"Sydney, I had to say that…they obviously weren't going to let us in the old fashion way. And they're a little too jumpy to argue with."

"Look!" Vaughn stopped walking pointing to a section of windows that were lit. "Someone's in there."

"It's got to be Mom." She said looking up at the top of the fence. "We can scale it."

"And get shot in the process?" Jack shot back. "We didn't come equipped for this." He looked down at his civilian attire.

"How much equipment do we need to scale a fence?" She furrowed her eyebrows at her father. "Dad… Mom's in there I know it. I'm going in." She jumped onto the iron bars and began making her way over. Jack and Vaughn following behind.

They made their way around the back of the house, through the garden they recognized from the photos, and to the massive front doors.

"Now what?" Vaughn asked staring at the massive doors in front of them.

"We ring the bell." Sydney pushed the delicate brass button near the side of the door.

_***Say***_

They waited nervously, scanning their surroundings for any sign of the guards. The door slowly creaked open and an older looking man dressed in a black butlers suit answered. He was immediately alarmed at finding three strangers on the doorstep and looked around for the guards, holding tightly to the door.

"Can I help you?" He asked nervously.

"Yes, we need to speak with my... with Irina Derevko." Sydney responded in Russian and pushed forwards toward the door, believing more then ever her mother was in there with the man's startled reaction.

"I'm sorry, there is no one here by that name." He replied quickly attempting to shut the door. "Da Svidanya."

"Wait!" Sydney switched to English in panic mode and shoved her foot in the door blocking him from closing it further. "I know she's here! She's my mother!"

The man seemed even more surprised and visibly paled but attempted to dismiss her again. "I'm sorry, she's not here."

From behind the door they could hear a familiar voice ask, "Dmitri, who is it?" Katya walked into the room hearing the bell.

"Katya!" Sydney screamed past the man still trying to push her out, "It's me! Sydney!" She recognized her aunt's voice.

Katya was startled and instantly went into her own panic mode looking around the room. It was too late to pretend she wasn't there. She calmed herself and walked up to the door, touching the older man lightly on the shoulder motioning for him to let Sydney pass. She was not prepared to see, that Sydney was accompanied by Jack and Vaughn. "What are you doing here?" She asked in English as they passed her through the doorway. Already having a good idea why.

"Is my mother here? I need to talk to her." Sydney scanned the darkness for any signs of her mother.

The room was a massive open foyer with marbled floors and leather chairs and sofas, presumably a waiting area. The cathedral ceilings were lined with gold trim and a skylight, letting the full moon wash over the floor.

The second floor's banisters met on one end of the room as the two separate staircases met in a landing and flowed into one grand staircase, a wall of glass windows behind them. It was spectacular.

She turned her back from the staircase towards her aunt and waited for Katya's answer.

"You shouldn't have come here. This is dangerous. You should leave… now!" Katya motioned for them to leave.

"We know about the baby." Jack handed the sonogram photo to Katya, who remained silent for a moment.

"You could've have killed them with that raid!" She hissed, her anger getting the best of her.

"It wasn't us! Kendall went behind my back with a Delta team." Jack tried to defend himself.

"Please! Is she here?" Sydney pleaded, "I have to talk to her! I have to tell her I know! I know the truth now!" Sydney couldn't keep the tears in any longer and the sad look in her eyes was killing Katya.

"Please! I have to tell her I remember, I… I have to tell her I love her!" Sydney cried saying it out loud and admitting it for the first time, "to the moon and back, more than the stars in the Heavens and the grains of sand on Earth…"

"Forever and always…" came a familiar broken voice behind them.

Irina had heard the bell as she was getting ready for bed and the following commotion and went to investigate. She now stood frozen on the landing of the staircase, looking down at the group with tears welling in her eyes listening to her daughter's plea and recitation of their saying.

Sydney whirled to see her and Jack felt his breath catch at the sight of a pregnant Irina in a cream-colored, spaghetti strapped, satin nightgown, illuminated like a descending goddess by the moonlight.

"Mom…" Sydney whispered, frozen for a moment before running up the stairs and into her mother's arms.

Still stunned, Irina felt Sydney melt into her arms, crying and gave into the emotion herself. They remained holding onto each other for a few minutes before Irina finally spoke. "You remembered?" She pulled back smiling, using her thumbs to wipe the tears on Sydney's cheeks.

"Yes, I remember it all. Mom, we know the truth, at least part of it." She held onto Irina's hand, not wanting to break the contact. "We know what you did for us, what happened to you." Sydney started sobbing again, unable to finish thinking about the atrocities committed against her mother.

"Shhh." Irina pulled her into her again, not wanting to think about Cuvee and Kashmir at a time like this, meeting Jack's eyes for the first time over Sydney's shoulder.

"I love you."

She heard Sydney say into her hair and she closed her eyes, smiling as she let tears fall. She pulled back again when Sydney stopped shaking. "I'd do it all over again, for this moment. I love you too, Sweetheart." Irina smiled as a tear made its way down her cheek, brushing Sydney's cheek with her fingers.

"You're having a baby!" Sydney smiled placing her hands gently on each side of Irina's belly, looking up to meet her mother's eyes again. "I'm going to be a sister." She smiled brightly through her tears, seeing her mother in a new light.

"Yes." Irina smiled, placing her damaged hand on the top of her belly with Sydney's.

Sydney saw her mother's look of apprehension as she glanced down the stairs towards Jack and Vaughn. "We're not here for the CIA. we just want to talk." Sydney looked her in the eye, trying to reassure her.

"Let's go sit." Irina smiled, "I'm sure you have a lot of questions." Sydney took hold of her good hand and helped her down the stairs, Irina's eyes never leaving Jack's. "Jack." She whispered under her breath coming face to face with him once reaching the bottom.

"Irina." He greeted her with the same uneven breath. His eyes wondering down her body to her protruding belly and back up again. The silent message of 'we'll talk about that later,' clearly communicated through their look, knowing their daughter needed Irina now.

"Agent Vaughn." Irina tore her eyes from Jack's to greet the handsome young man. Vaughn swallowed hard, unsure how to address her, as he never had formally before.

"Irina." He finally got out causing Irina to smile her Cheshire cat grin at his nervousness.

"Please, follow me." She motioned for them to follow her into the next room, Sydney still holding her good hand; the sheer size and beauty of the palace breathtaking and daunting all at once.

They walked into a gorgeous library, books on shelves from floor to ceiling, everywhere you looked. She took a seat with Sydney on the sofa in the center of the room, Jack taking a seat to the left of her in a big leather armchair, and Vaughn in the one across from them.

Katya stood cautiously behind her sister. "Rina… are you going to be ok?"

"Yes." She smiled in appreciation for her sister's concern, relinquishing her hold of Sydney's hand to squeeze her sister's.

"Your hand is freezing." Katya sounded alarmed finally noticing what little Irina was wearing. "I'll go get your robe…then I'm going to bed. Let you all talk."

"Thank you." Irina smiled once again. As soon as Katya let go of her hand, she found Sydney's again, causing Sydney to smile, though it quickly faded seeing the scar on her mother's chest.

"Are you ok?" She asked concerned, needing to hear from her mother's own lips that she was ok.

"Yes, I am now." Irina smiled. "The bullet punctured my lung and nicked my Aorta, but it's healing well…" She lost the smile and turned to Jack replying calmly, "and you just grazed me. Thankfully." Her hand once again protectively going to cover her baby beneath and Jack found it hard to swallow.

"What about your hand? I'm so sorry I couldn't stop him." The tears began welling in Sydney's eyes again. "It should have been me."

"Sydney, no." Irina brushed Sydney's cheek with the back of her fingers, enjoying the contact. "Don't apologize for something you had no control over and I certainly don't regret my decision to save you from this." She looked down at her hand. The pins had been removed though she still had difficulty moving her wrist and fingers. "My hand will be just fine and working like normal in no time." She smiled and Jack knew she was giving them the 'optimistic' version of the truth.

"And the baby?" Jack asked concerned what damage this all might have done to their unborn child, especially the bullet wound he inflicted there.

"She's ok. A little small, but strong and healthy." Irina gave him a reassuring smile, seeing the real concern in his eyes.

"She?" Sydney couldn't contain her surprise.

"Yes, you're going to have a little sister." Irina smiled at Sydney and looked to Jack, seeing the surprise on his face.

"When are you due?" Jack found his voice, figuring it had to be sometime in mid-November.

"November 15th." Irina spoke softly knowing that would be a shock to them.

"The day you di…" Sydney trailed off realizing what she was about to say and Irina nodded. "Does she have a name?"

"I have a couple I'm leaning towards, nothing set in stone though," Irina looked cautiously at Jack and diverted her eyes towards the door where Katya was bringing her robe. "Thank you." She smiled at her sister and rose to put the robe on, her belly eye level with Jack.

The robe was made of the same satiny fabric and Irina didn't bother tying it, as it would be a little snug around her belly.

Katya kissed her on the cheek, "Don't stay up all night. Remember you have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and you need your rest. Spokoinoi nochi." She silently handed Irina the sonogram photo that Jack had given her when they first arrived. Irina smiled at the photo and set it carefully on the coffee table, saying nothing about how they found it. Katya looked around at the faces before her, sending silent messages to them all before she left that if they tried anything to hurt her sister, they'd be sorry.

"She takes good care of you." Jack watched Katya leave.

"She saved my life." Irina answered solemnly. All of them realizing that it was Katya who found her that night, remembering Katya's words about their relationship changing drastically for the better a couple of months ago.

"How long have you known?" His eyes going back to her belly as she took a seat again, still marveled at the baby there.

"A couple of months or so… they told me when I awoke after surgery." She leaned forward and picked up the photo of the baby again, "I guess I don't have to ask when or how you figured it out."

Knowing they would figure out she was pregnant after the raid in Rio… She was surprised that Jack was remaining rather calm about the situation given the circumstances.

"Yes…" He spoke softly, "We've learned quite a lot about you in the past couple of months…" He saw the immediate sadness flash across her features before recomposing herself. Being pregnant, it was harder to compartmentalize her feelings.

"Katya told me… you discovered my original KGB file… and the films they kept on me." She set the photo back on the table again, slowly.

"Yes." Jack looked sympathetically towards her, his voice carrying none of its usual roughness. She turned her eyes away from him; unable to stand the look he was giving her, the corner of the end table now holding her full attention.

"I never… I never saw the file… but I should have found it… and destroyed it." She could feel the tears beginning to pool in her eyes. "No one should ever have seen that." She didn't want to cry in front of them at the thought, and rose from her seat, adverting all their eyes. "I'm being a terrible host. You've traveled a long way… I'll get us some tea." She attempted a smile.

Jack knew exactly what she was doing, and grabbed her hand just as she breezed by them. Holding it exactly like she held his on the plane to Hong Kong, rubbing the back of it with his thumb, forcing her to look him in the eye. "Thank you…" He spoke softly, sending her a message that was meant to thank her for so much more then getting them refreshments.

Irina's eyes, still glistening with unshed tears, briefly nodded and pulled her hand away from Jack's as she headed towards the kitchen.

Jack turned his attention back to Sydney and Vaughn who were still staring at him, never having witnessed any physical contact between Jack and Irina before and surprised that Jack reached out to her.

"Maybe I should go with her." Sydney spoke, suddenly worried that her mother was really escaping again. "What if she doesn't come back?" She began to get off the couch in search of Irina when Jack placed his hand on her knee stopping her.

"Sydney… I know this is going to sound strange coming from me, but let's give her the benefit of the doubt this time." He could see the shock evident in her face. "I think she just needed a minute to collect herself." He was slowly learning to stop jumping to conclusions where Irina was concerned and he hoped he was right in not sending Sydney to find her.

Sure enough, Irina returned moments later and took a seat on the sofa again, fully in control of her emotions once again.

Seeing the looks of relief on their faces she realized what they had been thinking. "Thought I was making my escape again didn't you." She smiled, not wanting or waiting for their answer. "Dmitri's making the tea and will bring it out when it's ready."

An uncomfortable silence followed, as no one really knew where to begin or what to say. Irina wasn't sure what 'truth' they knew and decided to let them ask the questions.

"Agent Vaughn," Irina turned her attention to the young man she could see was struggling with something. The way he was looking at her, something had changed. She could see it in his eyes. He hadn't spoken two words since their arrival and she was certain he was studying her, the look in his eyes telling her he wanted to know something and she was puzzled as to why he was here and not running to turn her in. "You seem very troubled." The look in her eyes was that of true concern.

Vaughn took a deep breath and forced him self to look Irina in the eye, "I want you to tell me about my father… Mikhail Vontonavich." He could see the surprise in Irina's eyes. "I know he was KGB…I know you had a relationship with him… and I know he died trying to escape Kashmir with you." He refused to blink, not wanting to take his eyes off Irina's.

Irina had been completely blindsided and was struggling to control her emotions but was successful none-the-less. She could feel Sydney and Jack's eyes bearing into her as intensely as Vaughn's. "What would you like to know about him?" She spoke softly, returning the intense stare. Knowing it was pointless to ask 'how' they knew about him at this point, it was obvious they did and that was all that mattered now.

"Everything." Vaughn remained intensely focused though his words were softer and heart sinking at her confirmation she did, indeed, know him.

"I don't know where to start?" She began but her attention suddenly shifting to the older man entering the library. It was the same man who answered the door, though now he looked like he'd been about ready for bed as well, wearing slippers and a robe over his pajamas. He was carrying a silver tray with the tea.

"Your tea, Tsarina." He addressed Irina and placed it on the table in front of her.

Irina blushed seeing the surprised look on Jack, Sydney and Vaughn's faces. "Thank you, Dmitri… but how many times do I have to ask you to stop calling me that?" She asked in Russian, while he began pouring everyone a cup.

Seeing her speak her native language was enthralling to Jack and Sydney.

"Would you prefer if I called you Empress then, My Child?" He asked smiling as he began handing the teacups out.

"No." Irina chuckled. "No." She shook her head.

"But it is your given name and rightful title, Tsarina." He stood, looking at Irina with the same stubbornness she possessed.

"Just call me Irina or even Rina." She smiled taking hold of the older man's hand and giving it a squeeze, "Please?"

The man smiled in return.

"Where are my manners... Dmitri... allow me to introduce my daughter Sydney, her father Jack, and Michael." She gave a slight smile. "Jack, Sydney, and Michael... this is Dmitri."

The man smiled and gave a light nod in acknowledgement. "Would you care for anything else, Madame?"

"No, thank you, Dmitri…we have everything. Please, go to bed now my friend. I'm sorry to keep you awake this late. Spokoinoi nochi."

The man nodded and stepped back, "Spokoinoi nochi," He glanced around the room extending the wishes to all, and then back to Irina where he gave a slight bow, "Spokoinoi nochi, Tsarina." He smiled and turned to leave before she could give another rebuttal.

Irina continued to blush and shook her head, chuckling at the old man. "Where were we?" Her eyebrows furrowed in thought, regaining her seriousness. "Oh yes, where to begin…"

"How about the beginning…'_Tsarina_." Jack raised his eyebrow suggestively while maintaining his serious tone.

Irina shot him a 'death glare' that the Derevko women had mastered so well, with a bewitching shy smile.

"Please Mom," Sydney brought Irina's attention back to the question at hand, "Tell me about her… my grandmother… Anastasia. You said I would have liked her…"

"Oh yes, Sydney," Irina smiled thinking about her mother, "You would have loved her. You remind me of her in so many ways… so beautiful, strong, independent… stubborn." Irina laughed, "I guess we both inherited that part."

"I still can't believe that my grandmother was Anastasia Romanov…" Sydney looked down at their joined hands, "This is so surreal." She sighed looking up into Irina's eyes. "How did she survive the massacre?"

Irina took of sip of tea and placed it on the saucer, setting it back on the table. Seeing an opportunity to start rebuilding some trust with her daughter, she leaned back against the pillows of the couch and began telling the story... the truthful story of her family and her past.

"My mother told me this story only once… when I was thirteen. She said that was going to be the only time we would discuss it. I could see how painful it was for her to talk about and my father told me when I got older that she still suffered terribly from the nightmares of that night. As you probably already know, they took my grandfather Nicholas and the entire family to Ekaterinburg in Siberia after the Revolution. They were all locked in a small room in the basement of the house and lined up in front of a firing squad." Irina paused a moment seemingly lost in thought, a sad expression on her face. "When it was over, their bodies were thrown into the back of a truck and two young soldiers were told to take them to an old mining shaft and throw their bodies into it. Along the way, the truck got stuck in the mud and stalled. The two young officers panicked and decided to bury the bodies along side the road in a field. As they climbed into the back of the truck they noticed that my mother was still alive, as was her brother, my uncle, Alexei. The two young soldiers argued over what to do because neither of them wanted to kill them or bury them when they were still alive. My mother grabbed one of their hands and begged them for help. The soldier was my father, Dmitri." Irina could already see what they were thinking by their reactions. "No, not 'that' Dmitri," She gestured with her eyes towards the area where the man had just left. "He has been a long time employee and a friend of our family for years, since I was a child… he happens to share the same name with my father." She smiled and continued. "My father was all of seventeen years old at the time and couldn't deny my mother's pleas. They decided that it was a miracle that she and Alexei had survived and weren't about to tempt fate. They buried the rest of the family quickly and brought my mother and uncle to an abandoned house just off the road. The occupants had recently vacated because of the Revolution so it was adequately supplied with means for them to get by on. They treated them as best they could and returned to their posts, informing their superiors they'd completed their tasks, as to not cause suspicion. They tried desperately to help my mother and Alexei but in the end, Alexei was too ill and too weak and passed away. They buried him in the back yard…" She trailed off, thinking about the day when she retrieved his remains not too many years ago. "While nursing my mother back to health, my father fell completely in love with her and she with him."

Irina smiled thinking about her mother's face lighting up at this point in the story. "He found a way to smuggle her out of the country and into France, where they were married shortly after in Paris. They remained hidden there, under alias names for years. The family that didn't escape Russia was being savagely murdered one by one under Lenin. The horrors only continued with Stalin and my mother lived in constant fear. She refused to have any children at that time, fearing that one day she'd be found out and her children would be killed as well." Her eyes began to tear up, having similar thoughts herself about her own children's safety, realizing all to well that the fear was well founded. "Finally, with the death of Stalin, changes were beginning to take place in Russia and my father who had contacts on the inside, told them it was safe for them to return. Nikita Kruschev, the new leader, learned of my mother's identity and vowed to keep it a secret from the public, as long as she did. It served his own purposes, knowing that if the people found out my mother had survived, they would revolt, claiming her to be the true and rightful leader of Russia as the only surviving member of the family. He wanted to stay in power, and she just wanted to live peacefully in her home country so she obliged by his rules and he didn't kill her. She found out she was pregnant with me shortly there after." Irina smiled and gently rubbed her belly with her fingers, imagining her mother being pregnant with her at around the same age for the first time. "My father said it was a surprising blessing as they had given up on ever having a family. He said it brought the sparkle back into my mother's eyes and a 'peace' to her soul. I was there 'second chance'... Katya followed a year later. The government kept tabs on everything we did and we were forced to live a life of secrecy and lies, only our parent's closest friends new our true identity out of fear for our lives. Two of those close friends, Mr. Vaughn, were your grandparents, Talia and Mishka." She smiled softly and took another sip of tea.

Vaughn remained silent and let her continue.

"The government had taken everything from my mother, she had nothing left of her former life. When they moved to Russia they had to start all over and we were living in poverty. My father was a brilliant man, a mathematics professor in Paris, but was not allowed to work as such inside the Soviet Union. He worked very hard when I was little. I remember only getting to see him a couple of hours a day when he would come and tuck us in for bed when he was leaving for one factory job and waking us for school when he was coming home and leaving for the other. He always made sure that Katya and I never went without any thing that was necessary. We never went hungry, and we always had clothes and of course there was a lot of love and laughter. Whenever he had a spare moment he was always insisting upon teaching us something new. He wanted us to be educated and prepared for when we started school." She smiled focusing on Vaughn again, "It was at one of his factory jobs that he made friends with your grandfather… My father was offered a job with the Soviet government when I was almost six years old, and though he loathed taking it…it presented a lot of opportunities for a better life for us. He made more money and we were able to move into a better neighborhood with better schools… My family remained good friends with your father's and eventually, your grandfather went to work for the government as well. I knew your father since I was two years old…" She kept her eyes focused on Vaughn, not wanting to look at Jack. "Growing up, our families spent a great deal of time together and we played together often as children…often sneaking into this palace to play in the Children's gardens and house my grandfather had built for my mother and her sisters and brother. We went to the same sports clubs and were in the same schools. Other then my sister, he was my best friend and the only friend who knew my true identity. I could talk to him about anything. Mikhail understood my frustrations with my life being so restricted. He understood my passion to get out from under the microscope. He was recruited into the KGB two years before me. I was fifteen and he was eighteen when he finally asked me out…" She smiled and shook her head thinking about how young that really was and what a long time ago it seemed to be. "We dated a while but decided that it wasn't meant to be…that we were better as friends…and we were, not to say we didn't love each other…we did," Irina braved a glance at Sydney and then, back to Vaughn, still ignoring Jack and thankful he was sitting off to the side of her. "But not 'in love' with each other. Your father left on his KGB assignment on October 1st, of 1970… that was the last time I saw him, until the summer of 1974 when Jack and I attended a formal dinner in Washington for the Department of State and we ran into each other…"

Jack's mind raced back to that night. He remembered the encounter as well, but had forgotten about it until now. He was so proud to call her his wife that night, having the entire party enchanted not only by her stunning beauty, but by her wit as well. She certainly was the best of the best when it came to enchanting, dangerously so… He had introduced them, remembering the man from their time at Langley together, and could see the sparkle and surprise in Irina's eyes as the man kissed her hand. Jack had chalked her reaction up to the comment that Vaughn's father made to him, while kissing her hand, about how Jack was so lucky to find a beauty with brains. Now he knew why…

"We ran into each other again in the hallway near the restrooms and arranged to meet each other early in the morning the next day."

Jack felt his chest getting tighter at the thought of Irina running away in the middle of the night to meet with her old boyfriend in some hotel room while he slept. He also remembered her sliding back into bed with him and spooning up behind him.

"It was so exciting to see him again, he was the only familiar face I knew from back home." Irina smiled. "So much had changed in both of our lives since we'd last seen each other. He told me he had met, and fallen completely in love with your mother while on assignment in France, that they married and that he was now a father. He couldn't stop talking about how happy he was and showed me pictures of you and your mother."

Vaughn felt a tug of war going on inside him about this information.

"I was so happy for him, I could see it in his eyes… he was truly happy. He asked me about my life and said that Jack seemed like a wonderful man and husband, but he was concerned…" Irina finally looked at Jack, "Because he could see, that I was falling head-over-heals in love with Jack… and by doing that, I was putting myself in danger… I told him it was too late… I'd already fallen and now we were having a baby…"

Irina tore her eyes away from Jack's and turned them back to Sydney and Vaughn, "He could see how happy I was and told me he was happy for me… but that he was still worried about me… worried about 'us,' about leaving this wonderful life and our families behind someday… I told him to stop worrying about something that might never come… but it did." She looked down sadly at the empty cup in her hand. "I received my orders to 'remove' your father from his assignment, I hadn't seen him since that night in D.C. … He had received his orders for extraction and met with me in warehouse downtown."

"Where they found his body…" Vaughn whispered quietly, mentally thinking out loud.

"Yes." She spoke just as softly, still skeptical of revealing this information to them. "He didn't want to leave you, Vaughn…"

She looked deep into his eyes wanting him to see that his father loved him as much as she loved Sydney and they had no choice, "Or your mother… but we had no choice at the time. We followed our orders… and I killed 'William Vaughn."

"Where did you get the body?" Vaughn wanted to know exactly how his father's 'death' was planned for, wanting to know exactly how he was deceived for all these years. "We buried someone in that gravesite and I want to know who."

"I don't know. Khasinau provided the body and it was my job to make it unrecognizable yet identifiable as your father. I asked, whom the person was… he told me 'someone who didn't listen to orders,' and that was my cue to stop asking questions. I just wanted to get it over with. So I did my job and then drove your father to the Mexican border… I didn't see him again until Kashmir." Her eyes once again started to fill with tears and she forced herself to blink them back.

"Why was he there? Why did the KGB suspect my father of being double-agent?"

"Vaughn, your father was so miserable when he returned… he thought of nothing but returning to his wife and son…He made the decision that he was going to turn himself in to the CIA and ask for immunity as a defector… The KGB caught him on train out of the country."

Vaughn was stunned silent by the news that his father had tried to make his way back to them, and that is why he was imprisoned.

"He'd been in Kashmir, for four months already by the time I arrived. Vaughn… he loved you… so much. He told me… that just before he left… you were trying out for the little league baseball team."

Vaughn's eyes perked up at mention of it.

"He survived everyday he was in that hell hole…by imagining you what position you'd play… hitting a home run…he was trying to keep his sanity. By concentrating on the people he loved, doing normal everyday things… it would take his mind off what was happening to him." She had to pause to wipe away a tear making its way down her cheek. "I know what that's like… I was doing the same thing by imagining everyday… what Sydney was in her Thanksgiving play." The tears were now making a steady stream down her cheeks.

"That's why you asked about the play… what part I played?" Realization suddenly hitting Sydney smack in the chest about why her mother's first question about her life after not seeing her for twenty years, was about a play that took place just after she 'left.' Sydney started crying and pulled her mother into her, feeling like that six-year-old little girl all over again who just wants to hug her mommy…

Jack was feeling especially guilty, once again, at this new revelation. It was Sydney's answering of the 'Thanksgiving Play' question that pushed him over the edge when Irina was in CIA custody. He'd seen the question as a manipulation by Irina, in trying to forge a bond with their daughter and he wasn't about to let that happen… He set her up, and she was almost successfully executed because of it… because Irina wanted to know that Sydney was a turkey… Not out of malicious intent, but because that thought had been her saving grace in keeping her sanity in tact while she was being tortured in prison… The thought of what he almost did, and the ridiculous reasons behind it… making him sick now that he knew the truth.

Sydney pulled back from Irina and wiped away her mother's tears for the first time. Irina smiled at her daughter and nodded in Vaughn's direction. Sydney turned to see the tears in Vaughn's eyes from learning his father's own survival method and Irina was prompting Sydney to give him a hug too. Sydney caught on to why her mother was nodding and moved to Vaughn's side, kissing his temple and pulling his head into her as she sat on the arm chair, giving him the side-ways hug.

"Tell me about the escape? Please…" Vaughn's tone with Irina was growing softer the more he learned about her and his father.

"Between our torture sessions… they would make us work. I passed your father a couple of times when we'd both been scrubbing the floors or doing laundry… We were never able to talk much but we had other ways of communicating…"

"Such as…"

"Morris code with our eyes or writing messages in code with the soap…" Seeing their incredulous looks of astonishment, "I know it sounds crazy… but it's all we had. I had access to Cuvee's office a few times… each time… I was able to memorize something different… the plans of the prison, the sewer tunnels and land mine locations."

They could see from the look in Irina's eyes 'why' it was exactly that she had 'access' to Cuvees office and the images of her rape on the film began flashing through their minds. This 'sick son-of-a-bitch' must have been having his' own private 'sessions' with her.

"We were almost through the landmines when we heard the alarm that announced our escape. The condition your father was in… I knew there was no way he was going to survive if he was caught… and the chances of one of us getting away was better then two… so I stopped running. It didn't take long for the guards to get to me… your father turned around and noticed I wasn't behind him anymore… he stood staring at me for a second… I started screaming for him to 'RUN!' But he remained there… I saw a guard aiming to shoot him and I kicked the legs out from under him, yelling at your father once again to get the hell out of there… he turned around and started running again… but he looked back… and then there was a giant flash as a landmine went off… I screamed… and then they knocked me out." Her eyes moist again with unshed tears. "That was the last time I saw your father."

Vaughn remained silent for several moments, "You plead guilty to my father's murder…you were almost executed for committing a non-existent murder… why? Why would you do that? Why would you let us keep believing you killed him?"

Irina thought carefully about how to answer this question, "I saw what finding out about who I really was, did to my daughter… my husband… it destroyed their lives. Everything I loved… was lost. There was no point of living for me anymore…" Irina's tears began falling again, "I was already going down…and I saw no point in exposing your father and bringing him down with me. He was a good, kind, decent man who loved his country… but loved his wife and son even more. If you don't believe in anything else I say… please believe in that. Your father was the same man you knew and loved…there was just more to him then you were able to see." Irina didn't think she could take any more crying tonight and revealing painful memories, she collected herself and rose from the couch, "Listen, it's late and you've traveled such a long way. I know you must be tired and I have to get up early for my appointments in the morning. We can finish talking tomorrow, ok? But for now, I think it's best if we all just go to bed and try to get some sleep."

They nodded in agreeing with her.

"I'll show you to your rooms, follow me." She walked out of the library towards the grand staircase, the three of them following closely behind.

"Wait…we left our bags…" Sydney began noticing they were no longer near the door where they'd left them.

"I asked Dmitri if he would take them up for you while I was in the kitchen. They are already waiting for you in your room." Irina smiled from the middle of the staircase. She led them past at least ten doors before finally making her into an enormous bedroom. It was newly renovated but in the traditional Russian style and it looked spectacular, like something out of a fairy tale.

There were giant glass doors with sheer white drapes leading out onto the balcony, and the ceiling at least thirty feet high was adorned with a beautiful mural of clouds and angel babies playing. The room was bigger then Sydney's entire house.

Jack noticed that Sydney and Vaughn's bags were waiting on the bed and he immediately became unnerved with the idea.

"Sydney…Vaughn, this is your room. There's a bathroom through that door," She pointed to the far end of the room, "And if you need anything at all… just press this button," She walked to a golden box with three colored buttons, sitting on one of the nightstands and pointed to the red one, "And Dmitri will get it for you. If you need me, I am the gold and Katya is the silver. Ok?" She smiled and rested her hands on top her belly before moving to walk out of the door, ignoring Jack's disapproving look that she would put their daughter and her boyfriend in the same room. "Sleep well. If I'm gone when you get up," Seeing Sydney's eyes flash with worry, "I will be back later." She smiled, and took hold of Sydney's hand. "I have some appointments I have to go to in the morning but I promise… I will come back. I was going to say…feel free to walk around and explore all you want while I am gone. The house, the gardens… whatever… Just don't get lost." She smiled and tilted Sydney's face with her fingers to look her in the eye. "Goodnight Sweetheart… I love you."

"Mom," Sydney grabbed her hand just as she was about to pull away, "I love you too." She smiled in return and pulled her in for a hug, loving this new relationship already. Her father had been right when he said she had wanted 'her' mother, her whole life. She couldn't seem to get enough of her now. "Spokoinoi nochi." Sydney said '_Goodnight_' to her mother in her native language for the first time. She was making an effort to understand her mother now.

The gesture brought tears to Irina's eyes again and she blinked them back, not wanting to cry again. She'd done enough of that already tonight. "Spokoinoi nochi." She smiled back and quickly left the room followed closely by Jack.

_***Sorrow***_

They walked past another five doors before Irina stopped and pushed her way into another enormous room, looking just about the same as Sydney and Vaughn's in design and architecture though the decoration was slightly different.

Jack saw his bag waiting on the bed as Irina breezed by him to close the curtain on one of the large doors leading to the balcony. "This is your room…" Jack looked at her tentatively.

"No… this is your room." She let a small smile escape before moving to leave. "Goodnight, Jack."

"Whoa…wait a minute!" Jack grabbed her hand and stopped her from leaving. They hadn't had a chance to talk alone or at all for that matter, all night and he wasn't ready to go to bed until he had his say. "We need to talk." He said softly, looking into her eyes, refusing to let go of her hand.

"Yes, Jack… I know we do, in fact I tried that before. But please, it's late… I'm tired and I don't think the baby and I can stand another one of your verbal assaults tonight… Can't this wait until tomorrow? I really don't want to fight with you tonight." Irina sighed trying to force herself not to get angry with him.

"I don't want to fight with you either, and 'no' this can't wait…we've waited too long already. Irina," He stole her move of caressing the back of her hand now that he was nervous, "I'm sorry."

She remained silent, staring at him intently with those big brown eyes.

"I'm sorry I didn't 'shut up' and listen to you… and I'm sorry for the horrible things I said to you… I didn't mean them."

"Yes you did. And you were right." She looked away from him and he lifted one of his hands to tilt her chin up to look at him, his hand remained on the side of her face.

"No. I didn't mean it and no, I wasn't right. I know what you did for me… for Sydney… I know why you did it. I was wrong about so many things… I'm sorry. What happened to you… in Kashmir…Cuvee…"

"Jack, please." Irina's eyes filled with tears and she tried to look away but Jack wouldn't let her. "I don't need your pity."

"I don't pity you… Pity is the furthest thing from my mind when I think of you… but I'm going to kill him… for what he did to you… what he did to our baby," Jack felt his eyes beginning to blur with unshed tears he was trying to control.

"Jack… I'm so sorry about the baby."

"Irina, its not your fault that man is insane. You did the best you could under the circumstances and you certainly don't have to apologize for what he did to you… He's an animal… not even an animal for what he did to you… Though I can't say I'm much better. I tried to have you executed for something you didn't do because I felt threatened by your relationship with our daughter… I shot you and almost killed you and our unborn child-"

"Jack…" She tore her eyes away and continued to stare at the floor as the tears made their way down her cheek. "It's late…you should get some sleep."

"And I lied to you… about that night in Panama."

Her eyes darted to his, searching for understanding.

"I wanted to hurt you… like you hurt me, so I lied to you about using you, getting revenge for all the years I thought you used me... I did 'see' your intentions that night and I know you weren't using me…I knew you were up to something with Sloane…I wished I were wrong, that I could change your mind. I knew you were going to try to stop me… stop us from making love because you didn't want me to think you were using me when you went through with your plan, but… I didn't care… I needed you Irina…just you… with no CIA, no Sloane, no missions or Rambaldi… no master plans. I just needed you. I wanted you…" Jack felt his heart start racing and the electricity begin surging through his body standing so close to Irina with her soft skin against his hand, looking at her standing there in the satin nightgown…images of her naked body melding with his that night in the hotel room racing through his brain, like every night since… Only now, she was here…standing in front of him again.

"Jack, if this is about the baby," She moved her hand to rest on her stomach, pulling her hand and face away from Jack's contact.

"No… it's not about the baby… I mean… yes, it is about the baby… Irina," He took hold of her hand once again, stepping in front of her to block her exit. "This is about us."

"There is no 'us,' Jack!" Her voice raising an octave as she pulled her hand from his grasp, "There will never be an 'us."

"I don't believe that… not for a second or you wouldn't have risked yourself… our baby, by coming to me in the US." Jack's voice was raising and he regretted the tone the moment it left his mouth, it had come out all wrong…sounding like an accusation instead of a desperate plea to hold onto her and not let her talk her way out of this.

"You think I would intentionally put our child at risk!" She fumed. "Everything I've done since I found out I was pregnant was in interest of protecting this baby! I came to you to try to 'explain' why I had done what I'd done and to tell you about the baby…because I felt you had the right to know!" She stepped back staring him straight in the eye. "The first time I felt her kick was right after you'd just told me you only slept with me to use me... "

Jack's face fell immediately.

"The thought that this beautiful life growing inside me, a life we created, was out of your revenge on me…" She shook her head, holding back more tears, "I realized then, there would never be an 'us' again, if there, ever was one before."

"You know that's not true… being married to you… was the happiest time of my life, and I don't care how or why you came into it anymore. After Madagascar… Sydney said to me, 'I think you loved Mom so much, that when she left you, you lost your soul…' Irina, she was right. Without you… I am this small, sad man without a future and I won't let you leave my life again without a fight." He took a step towards her, still seeing the storm brewing in her eyes, his voice grew soft. "And I didn't mean to accuse you of putting our child in harm's way intentionally, I know now, that you would do anything to protect our children."

"Yes. I would do anything for them, anything for their happiness, but Jack," Her rebuttal was cut off by a sharp series of wild kicks from the baby, starting against her diaphragm all the way to her sides. Her hands flew to her stomach, making her hunch over and she let out a deep breath through pursed lips.

"What is it?" Jack was immediately concerned. "Are you ok? Is it the baby?" He rattled out, in rapid succession.

Irina saw the flash of panic across his features and could see his true concern. She smiled, "I'm ok, the baby is fine. She apparently didn't like what I was about to say and let me know kicking me hard a few times."

Jack's eyes fell upon her stomach and smiled, wishing he could reach out and touch her.

Irina read his mind and reached out and took hold of his hand, placing it on her stomach where she still felt the baby kicking, her hand covering his. "Come on, Little One, don't be shy now." She smiled, and just as she finished Jack felt a quick, but hard, one-two punch against his hand. He smiled from ear to ear, shaking his head in amazement while he continued to stare at Irina's belly, where their hands remained.

"I almost forgot how amazing this is." His eyes finally meeting hers, "She's so strong."

"And very opinionated apparently." Irina returned the smile.

"She knows what's best for her Mommy… and that's no 'but Jack's." The baby had stopped kicking but Jack's hand remained on Irina's satin covered belly, enjoying the contact she was affording him.

"We live in the real world, Jack… not some fairy tale, and in the real world, you are the hunter and I am the hunted." She spoke softly. "There are always 'buts' in the real world."

"I think you and I are intelligent enough to find someway out of, or around those roadblocks, if 'we work together," He looked deep into her eyes, a small smile still grazing his lips. "We have worked well together in the past…and as far as the fairy tale," His hand snaked around to the small of her back as he took a step closer. "I believe anything is possible where you and I are concerned…" His breathing became heavy and there was no doubting the look in his eyes of desire as he studied her face. "Besides, I've already got the Princess." His eyes darted to her lips as he inched his body closer.

"I'm not a Princess." She breathed just as heavily, her eyes clouding over with just as much desire.

"Empress… Tsarina… whatever." His lips captured hers intensely, his hand on her back pulling her body closer to his while the other tangled itself in her long brown hair. He could feel the heat radiating off her body, just as sure as she could feel his desire burning for her.

Just when he thought he was about to lose himself to her and the kiss, Irina broke it off, pushing him back and out of breath.

Her lung hadn't been used to such 'vigorous' activities and she took a moment to slow her rapid breathing. She saw the disappointment and confusion in his eyes as she made her way to the door. "I'm going to bed now, Jack." She breezed by him and paused half way out the door, looking back at his darkened eyes, still swimming with desire.

He remained frozen in the middle of the room, his features fallen, he looked helpless as he watched her go.

"Aren't you coming?" She smiled coyly at him with a wink before she leaving the room.


	13. Chapter 13

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Far Away by Nickelback, **__**Have a Little Faith in Me **_**by Jewel****  
**

* * *

THIRTEEN

o

She had quite a gain on him and smiled over her shoulder as she saw him burst out the door behind her.

Jack tried to maintain his 'in control' demeanor and force himself to walk, not run, to catch up with her. Irina stopped at the very first door at the top of the stairs and smiled back at Jack once more before stepping inside.

When Jack finally reached the room his breath caught at the sight of her standing in front of the enormous glass doors, illuminated once again by the moonlight. Irina's back was turned to him, her arms encircling her chest as if trying to ward of the cold. She had removed her robe and stood only in the soft satin nightgown that seemed to be cut perfectly for every curve of her body. He walked slowly up behind her, brushing her hair off to the side to kiss her neck. The sensation of his hot lips on her skin made Irina shiver. His fingers moved to guide the strap of her nightgown off her shoulder, kissing her now hot flesh every inch of the way until the strap dropped from her shoulder.

His eyes immediately taking notice of the scar on her shoulder from the night in Panama where he had removed the tracker. His thumb caressing the raised flesh, eliciting the same gasp from Irina it had that night. He turned her in his arms and cupped her face with both hands, staring intently into her eyes before dropping his head to capture her lips.

_***Far Away ***_

There was no need for his tongue to ask for permission to enter her mouth. Her tongue met with his in burning desire. All thoughts of taking this slow went out the window at the electric heat generated between them with just a kiss. Irina's senses were magnified from her pregnancy and his touch on her skin felt like pleasurably painful torture. He moved his hands from her face and along her collarbones, guiding the other strap off her shoulder, moving his mouth and tongue along her jaw and to her throat. She let out another gasp for breath when Jack's mouth found her throbbing pulse and licked and bit in rhythm with her body. It felt unimaginable to be tasting and touching one another again. Craving it so after their last reunion in Panama. Seeing her rapid breath and glancing at the new scar on her chest Jack stopped his lingual assault much to Irina's disappointment.

"Maybe we should take this slower." His dark eyes swimming with lust. "You're not ready for this." His finger's tracing the scar between her breasts until it disappeared into the valley of darkness still covered by her nightgown.

"Let me be the judge of that." She licked her lips under Jack's heated stare.

"You just had Open Heart surgery a couple of months ago… I don't want to give you a heart attack." His fingers brushing over the roundness of the top of her breast, resting on her ribcage and pulling her to him with a devilish smile.

"Cocky aren't we, Jack?" She bit her lip and looked seductively at him. "Maybe it's you who should be worried about the heart attack. As I recall… I almost gave you one or two while I was pregnant with Sydney… with my primal tendencies."

Jack remembered quite well how crazy their love making was on a normal basis but when she was pregnant… with her hormones in overdrive… she worked him to near death, not that he was ever complaining. "Oh yes, I remember. But what about your hand." Jack swallowed hard, feeling his body reacting to her touch.

"I'll manage." Irina grabbed his shirt and ripped it open, spraying buttons all over the floor, knowing she couldn't undo the buttons and too impatient for them anyway. She pulled the shirt all the way off and threw it behind her.

"You're gorgeous." Jack's voice was low and throaty, looking at the gorgeous woman in front of him, impressed with her tenacity to overcome any obstacle in her way. He closed the distance between them crashing their mouths and bodies together as they made their way over to her bed. With the backs of her knees against the mattress, Jack's hands behind her neck and back, he guided her onto the mattress, his mouth never leaving hers as their tongues dueled for dominance. Straddling her body on his knees, leaning over, the feeling of her hard nipples caressing his chest through the satin fabric sent him into overdrive and his hands ached to touch the flesh of her body.

Irina moved her hands down his chest towards his pants, intending to set him free to satisfy the aching in her core but was stopped abruptly when Jack's hands caught hers and pinned them above her head. Using one hand to hold hers, his free hand made its way down her body, stopping to rub her nipple and eliciting a moan from Irina through their heated kiss. His hand and fingers continued their ministrations on her breast while his mouth once again found the pulse pounding feverishly on her neck. Moving his hand down her body and across her protruding belly, feeling confident enough to release her hands, he slid the other hand down her body in much the same fashion, stopping at the hem of her nightgown and teasing the skin of her thigh with his fingers as he slid the fabric higher and higher, making Irina wriggle beneath him. His fingers grazing lightly just above her core, driving her insane.

"Jack…" She whispered in a demanding plea and he met her demands by sliding his fingers into her already hot, wet, slick folds… finding her throbbing clit and torturing it mercilessly with his thumb.

Moving his mouth to trace her collarbone with his tongue as his fingers continued their assault; Irina began rocking her hips in unison with Jack's fingers and shrieked when she felt him plunge his fingers into her. Grabbing hold of his shoulders and digging her fingernails in trying to regain some of the control she was losing causing a moan to escape Jack's lips. Feeling the sudden urge to be buried deep inside her and too long denied the past several months, dreaming about her and craving her since their night together in Panama… he feverishly worked to undo his belt and pants kicking them off and onto the floor.

Before he knew what was happening Irina had flipped them over and was now straddling him, hovering ever so closely above his throbbing manhood. So close he could feel her wetness against him and reached up to pull her to him.

Irina caught his arm and gave him a look that told him she was in control now. Looking deeply into Jack's dark eyes she slowly began to lift the nightgown over her head and threw it off to the side. His eyes clouded over with lust at looking at her beautiful naked form hovering above him, her swollen breasts tantalizing. Her perfectly sculpted pregnant body, scars and all, was the most erotic thing he had ever seen and he felt a male dominance pride surging through him at the thought that he had some part in sculpting her this way… his baby growing inside her.

She inched forward, leaning into him as much as she could with her growing belly, and her hardened nipples just grazing his skin as she inched her way closer to his face, biting and trailing her tongue along his chin, getting just close enough to his lips to tease him, before pulling away.

She dragged her wetness along the length of his member as she went. Jack couldn't take it anymore and took hold of her hips, plunging himself into her leaving them both gasping for breath. Her heat and muscles grappling at him as he slowly pulled out only to plunge deeper into her then before causing her to throw her head back as she arched her body towards him.

The sight of her long hair swaying with their movements and Irina using her own hand to rub her aching nipples with her eyes closed, pulsated though Jack and his thrusts became more urgent driving them both closer to their goal.

Irina, wanting to be even closer to Jack, pulled herself off him, causing Jack to groan at the loss of contact. She turned herself around on him, so that her back was facing him and Jack knew exactly what she wanted… he was happy to oblige.

He sat up, and bent his knees so that she was now straddling them with her own legs, his chest pressed firmly against her back. He took hold of her hands, lacing their fingers and placed them back over her breasts, rubbing her nipples, as he once again plunged into her wetness, taking her from behind while they sat on their knees.

The closeness of their bodies and the new angle of his cock against her core igniting sparks within them both and he was able to drive deeper and deeper into her then ever before. Irina pressed her back against his chest coming closer and closer to losing control; she tore her hands away from his and wrapped her arms around his neck behind her. He moved one hand down her body to once again tease her clit as they continued to move up, down and in circular motions pushing them closer to their orgasm. His tongue sucked and licked greedily at the sweat on Irina's neck and shoulder.

Feeling herself about to lose it and wanting him to be right there with her, she spread her legs out further causing Jack to do the same, reached between the two of them and began caressing the spot just behind his balls with enough pressure to drive Jack into chanting her name, "Irina...Irina...Irina..." And over the edge at the same time she did; the blinding blackness and override of their senses causing them to temporarily blackout and fall over in bed.

With her vision returning and the ringing in her ears subsiding, Irina pulled herself off of Jack and turned in his arms, pressing her sweaty forehead against his and entangling her legs with his once again. Her breath still ragged and out of control, "Well, you've certainly given me a workout… though not the kind I think my physical therapist had in mind." She smiled placing her hand over Jack's heart visibly pulsating in his chest.

"God, I've missed you." Jack looked intently into her now black eyes still recovering from their 'explosion,' and kissed her soundly on the lips.

"Missed me… or the mind blowing sex?" She smiled teasingly but hesitantly; still unsure about where they were going. It was safer to keep it light when so much remained uncertain about their future or how he really felt about her. She was still reeling from the turn of events in the last several hours that landed Jack, in Russia with her, pressed naked flesh to naked flesh after believing she'd never see him again.

"I'd be lying if I didn't say both." Jack smiled and brushed a hair stuck to her cheek with sweat behind her ear. "You're dangerous." Jack sobered and whispered just barely under his breath. "You make me lose control… excite me… challenge me… in ways no others have been or will ever be able to... and I can't get enough of you, Irina... You're my addiction." He smiled and reached in kissing her fiercely once again while cupping her cheek.

* * *

Jack awoke in the morning to find the sheets next to him cold. Sweeping his hand across the area next to him with his eyes still closed, Jack instantly realized that Irina was gone. Panicked at the thought, his eyes flew open and he sat straight up in bed. "Irina," He called out, his eyes searching the large room. "Irina!" He called out again louder, feeling the panic rising.

_***Have A Little Faith In Me***_

Just as he was about to jump out of bed the bathroom door on the far side of the room opened and Irina stepped into view.

"What?" She asked walking towards him, still trying to fasten her earring to her ear. She smiled at Jack as he sighed in relief and then smiled as he took in her appearance.

She was wearing only a bra and jeans that were cut low and hung just above her slender hips.

"Nothing." Jack smiled, scanning her body and then resting on her face. "I just woke up and didn't know where you were… that's all." He reached his hand out to her and she sat on the edge of the bed.

Irina could see in his face the real reason he was upset… he thought she'd left again. "I didn't want to wake you." She smiled, choosing to ignore the real reason for his panic, and rubbed her fingers over his cheek. "I know you must be exhausted from lack of sleep and the jet lag." She winked and he pulled her to him for a long sweet kiss, running his fingers through her hair and up and down the flesh of her bare back. "Mmmm." She rubbed her nose against his before pulling back. "That's nice." She smiled. "It's good to know you don't feel differently about me in the morning." She teased, stroking the length of his arm with her hand and coming to rest on his chest she looked sincerely into his tired eyes. "It's early, Jack… you should go back to sleep for awhile."

"Why are you up so early? You've had the same amount of sleep…why don't you crawl back in here beside me?" Jack raised his eyebrows suggestively and tugged on Irina's arm causing her to laugh. She pulled herself off the bed and stood in front of him, Jack still holding onto her arm.

"Oh yes…" She laughed, "Like we'd actually get any sleep in, Jack. I have a couple of doctor's appointments and need to take care of some other things this morning so I can spend the afternoon here with you and Sydney… to finish talking." She looked away nervously, still unsure about what had happened and what would happen now in the daylight hours. She ran her free hand over her belly, something new she'd taken on to comfort herself and the baby.

Jack's eyes drifted to her bare stomach, and fell upon the scar roughly half an inch wide and six inches long. His fingers reached out to lightly trace the mark he'd made across her flesh. His smile faded at the thought that he'd scarred her for life and almost killed her and their unborn child. His eyes drifted back up to Irina's revealing the sadness and regret for his actions. "I'm sorry." He looked deeply into her dark pools trying to convey his true remorse.

"It's alright." Irina spoke softly, wanting to avoid this discussion and the reminder of Jack's attempt to kill her. "I know you thought I had hurt Sydney." She tried to pull back but Jack held firmly to her arm.

"No… it's not alright. I made a mistake…one that almost cost you your life…twice actually, framing you for Madagascar…"

"Jack," Irina interrupted and pulled her hand out of his grasp, "Let's not talk about this now. We've both made mistakes…"

"Yes," Jack leaned forward and recaptured her hand, refusing to let her go. "But most of them have been made because of our lack of communication and re-acting on impulses… but its not healthy for either of us … So I'm trying to change that poor behavior… I won't let you brush off what I did as nothing. I know you're hurt… I can see it in your eyes…" He stood and cupped her face with his hand forcing her to look at him. "And I want you to know… that I am truly sorry… I didn't know. It's not an excuse… just an explanation. I hope you can see that."

Irina leaned in and kissed him, leaving him breathless, before pulling out of his arms. "I know, Jack." She smiled and turned back towards the bathroom.

'The kiss and run,' Jack shook his head and dropped back onto the bed. A maneuver she'd perfected during their marriage to avoid answering questions or subjects she wasn't comfortable with. Some habits were going to be hard to break. He could see her uncertainty and the inner turmoil raging inside her, struggling to understand and trust in anything he was saying that had to do with their relationship. To allow her self to believe it could work out, not just today or tomorrow but in the long run… for the rest of their lives. Working through it all, was going to take time. He wasn't foolish enough to think that all their problems would just suddenly go away now that some truth had been shared between them. It was going to take a lot of work on both their parts. They just had to allow each other that time, to work through it. 'One step at a time.'

Irina closed the door to the bathroom and silently cursed herself for pulling the 'kiss and distract' move on Jack again.

What really upset her was how scared she was about letting herself believe in having a 'real' relationship with him… with her family again after all this time and all the heartache they shared. She was afraid to let herself hope that 'this time' it would all work out… this time she would have her absolution.

She calmed herself and strode back into the bedroom with an air of confidence. Ignoring Jack, who was following her movements without saying a word, she opened her closet and plucked a white formfitting v-neck t-shirt from its hanger.

Without turning around, she pulled the shirt over her head and over her belly, which it didn't quite cover but left just enough skin exposed to be sexy. She smiled to herself feeling Jack's gaze on her as she finished getting dressed, enjoying the fact that she held his attention.

Feeling the baby kicking inside her as she pulled on her boots and grabbed a light brown suede jacket, she realized she needed to get something to eat before she left for her appointments.

'The baby,' she thought to herself as she slowly closed the closet doors. 'If things were normal with us… he'd be there today with me.' "Jack," she turned slowly to face him, "I'm having another ultrasound today… would you like to go with me… to see the baby?" 'One step at a time,' she thought nervously.

"I would love to." Jack smiled, "Are you sure?" He asked nervously, still feeling out of place when it came to the baby.

"Yes, of course." Irina smiled genuinely in return, "She's your daughter too."

A moment of silence passed between them before Irina made a move towards the door.

"Get dressed and I'll meet you downstairs." She took one last look at him, smiling at how cute he looked with his hair all ruffled sitting in her bed in a tangle of sheets.

Jack sprang out of bed as soon as the door closed behind her and suddenly realized he'd left his bag in the other room. He grabbed a sheet and wrapped it around his waist, hopping that he wouldn't run into anyone on his way down the long hall.

Just when he thought he'd made it, he threw open the door to the room only to realize it was not the same one from last night. He stepped back into the hallway, looking from side to side trying to remember what door it was. He hadn't been paying attention to anything besides Irina last night when she was showing him to his room and now he couldn't remember where his clothes were. He tried the next, door down but that wasn't the room either. Flustered that he was left 'exposed' and mad at himself for not paying better attention to detail, he started pulling open every door on the way back to Irina's room at the beginning of the hallway.

"Daddy!" Sydney immediately bolted upright in bed when she heard the big door open and saw her father standing there clutching a bed sheet around his waist.

Jack stood paralyzed, in shock at the sight of his daughter in bed with Vaughn, who had visible scratch marks across his back. Awakened by the commotion, Vaughn sat up and stared at Jack as well.

"What are you doing?" Sydney asked turning red with embarrassment, and bringing Jack out of his state of shock to realize he was standing in the doorway to their room wearing little to nothing as well. His shade of embarrassment began to match that of Sydney's when he felt another's presence behind him.

"Yes, Jack, what are you doing?" Katya laughed as Jack's shocked face looked from his daughter still in bed with her boyfriend to Katya and then at the bed sheet around his body.

"Sorry," He glanced back up to Sydney and Vaughn, "I… just… wrong room. Sorry." He mumbled. "There are so many rooms in this damn house!" He felt the anger rising at his embarrassment.

"Jack, what are you looking for?" Katya goaded him.

"My room! I need a goddamn map to find it!" He pulled the sheet a little higher on his torso.

"You mean you don't remember?"

"No!" He gave her a sharp look knowing all too well that 'this' Derevko woman was just as infuriating as the other.

"What color was the décor?" She smiled, more relaxed, enjoying Jack's obvious squirming in front of her and the audience of Sydney and Vaughn.

"Light blue… I think." He spat out, unwilling to look at anything but the ground.

Katya was having a hard time trying not to burst out laughing. "Five doors down." She smiled leaning against the doorframe. "And Jack, make sure you take that sheet back to Rina's room." She smiled and finally lost it, laughing at the surprised looks on Sydney's, and Vaughn's faces, while Jack changed at least ten shades of red. Moving her head to pointedly look at Jack's back and graze the marks with her fingers, "She's an animal…like mother like daughter, I guess." She laughed looking back towards Sydney and Vaughn, who were slightly confused by the comment, not seeing what Katya was talking about.

Jack turned around to glare at Katya, leaving his back and Irina's scratch marks visible to a horrified Sydney and Vaughn. Sydney stared at him open mouthed while Vaughn froze and Jack pushed his way past Katya and down the hall.

"He's such an easy target." Katya laughed. "You two should go back to sleep… it's much too early to get up. I know you 'must' be tired." She winked and left, closing the door behind her.

"Yeah… she's right." Sydney shook her head, before laying it back down on her pillow. "Maybe when I wake up, that image and the mental picture I'm getting of my parents will be nothing but a bad dream… nightmare really."

"Syd, I think he's just as mortified seeing you in bed with me." Vaughn smiled and threw his arm across her stomach as they snuggled into each other again. "Like mother like daughter." He chuckled and she punched him in the arm, "Owe!" He rubbed his arm and pulled her on top of him so she was lying on his chest, smiling intently at her before closing the distance with a heated kiss.

* * *

"Your husband is such an easy target." Katya proclaimed walking into the kitchen.

Irina had been standing next to the French doors, sipping on some juice and eating a slice of mango looking out at the garden when Katya walked. "What did you do to him, Katya?" Irina looked pointedly at her sister but didn't leave her spot by the doors.

"I didn't do anything to him. The better question is what did 'you' do to him? He looks like he was attacked by a Siberian tiger." She laughed and made a hissing noise while clawing the air.

Irina almost choked on her juice, trying not to laugh.

"He got lost trying to find his way back to his room and wound up in Sydney's wearing nothing but a sheet. I think she may need counseling after seeing her father with claw marks, in your bed sheets, standing in the doorway while she's still in bed with her man… who was marked much the same way might I add." She raised her eyebrows suggestively as she poured a cup of tea and took a seat on the stool next to the servants breakfast bar.

"No doubt made worse by you egging the situation on." Irina walked towards her trying not to smile as she set her glass down next to her sister's and made her way over to the toaster, "I'm sure Jack will be ever so pleasant to be around for the next few hours, still fuming over the fact that I put those two in the same room together." She popped two pieces of toast into the contraption and leaned against the counter, arms folded and resting on her belly. "He refuses to acknowledge our daughter is all grown up with a sex life of her own." She laughed.

"Speaking of sex lives… you and Jack seem to be back on track in that department. What happened last night after I went to bed?" Katya whirled around on the stool to face Irina, waiting anxiously and cautiously for details about her sister's mysterious past showing up in the middle of the night. "Does this mean you've worked things out with them?"

"I don't know what it means exactly." Irina spoke softly as she buttered the toast and wrapped it in paper towel. "We talked… well I talked a lot last night. Tried to give them some perspective into my life. Tried to answer their questions the best I could…" She moved to the refrigerator to grab a bottle of orange juice. "They knew about Mikhail… they wanted to know about his life and what happened to him in Kashmir…" She grabbed the wrapped toast and bottle and stood in front of Katya.

"Did you tell them the truth?" Katya asked concerned for her sister, knowing it was a difficult topic for her to discuss.

"I answered all their questions." Seeing the disappointed look on Katya's face she added. "I didn't lie to them, Katya."

"No, but you didn't tell them everything either did you? Rina, you've been given a second chance here… one more then you ever thought possible… I know your afraid to take this leap of faith… but please, please don't take this for granted. This is what you've wanted and prayed for, for the last twenty-one years… This is your chance to have your family back." Katya reached out and placed her hands on either side of Irina's belly.

"I know… and I'm trying really, I am. It's just more complicated then I thought it would be." Irina looked down at her belly and back to Katya's eyes. "I've never been more afraid then I am of taking this leap… Everything I've ever wanted is right in front of me and yet I'm scared to death that it will be ripped away from me once again or I'll do something wrong and they'll change their minds…"

"What does Jack have to say about this?" Katya pulled her hands away and motioned for Irina to sit beside her but she remained standing.

"He says he wants to work things out… he doesn't care about the reasons why I came into his life anymore."

"And you don't believe him…"

"No… I mean, yes I believe him. I want to believe him when he says he doesn't care about the 'why' anymore… but I am still having a hard time accepting that he just accepts me for what I am now and those reasons just don't matter to him anymore."

"He wasn't aware of how deep your love for him was… still is. That's all that matters, Rina… the rest is as easy or complicated as you make it."

"You know it's not that simple. They are breaking the law just by -" Irina tried to protest but was cut off in argument.

"Yes it is. As long as you two realize what's the most important thing in your lives… the rest will find a way of working out. Believe in it… believe in yourself and believe in each other, Rina. Remember what Mama said…'Love abides by no boundaries or laws made by man…only the heart.' Be honest, Rina… Tell him how you feel. Tell him that you love him, that you always have… because I know you haven't or you wouldn't be so worried about all this." She stood and brushed Irina's cheek with her hand. She never thought she'd ever see the fear in her sister's eyes as she did now. Nothing, it seemed, could terrify her strong sister, but love…

"I have to go." Irina attempted a small smile, once again dodging a question and topic she wasn't in the mood to discuss, "If I don't meet Jack at the bottom of the stairs he'll get lost again and I don't have the time to look for him."

"Ah… so that's why you are wrapping up toast and taking juice with you… You're bringing your man his breakfast." Katya laughed and kissed Irina's cheek before making her way to the kettle for more tea.

"He hasn't eaten since… I don't know when, but he's bound to be hungry and thanks to you he's already going to be cranky. I don't want his hunger to add to his bad mood." Irina tried to pass off the loving gesture.

"Right… sure whatever you say." Katya smiled breezing by Irina still standing in the middle of the kitchen holding Jack's breakfast. "I'm happy he's going with you. I think it will be good for the both of you."

"I hope so."

"This baby represents the second chance life is throwing at you two. Be happy about it."

"I am happy about it!" Irina countered forcefully then smiled knowing her sister was just goading her. "I have to go. I'll see you later. Keep an eye on Sydney and Vaughn for me please… They have a way of finding trouble." Irina called from the doorway.

"Yet another thing mother and daughter seem to have in common." Katya said under her breath turning her attention to the morning's paper, smiling to herself at the turn of events.


	14. Chapter 14

**_AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat): Fumbling Towards Ecstasy _****by Sarah McLachlan****_, Never Grow Old _****by The Cranberries****_, Everything _****by Lifehouse,****_ and Bleed to Love Her _****by Fleetwood Mac**

* * *

FOURTEEN

o

Jack was sitting on the bottom step, waiting for Irina, when she found him. He stood to greet her and Irina was assaulted with what he was wearing. He was dressed in jeans and a form fitting black shirt that he'd pulled the sleeves up making them three-quarters in length. He looked damn sexy in black, as always, and Irina smiled eyeing his nipples harden through the fabric when she walked closer to him.

"I like that shirt." She smiled handing him the toast and juice.

"I like your boots." He raised his eyebrow and laughed. "Who knew you in Western boots would be so sexy? But now that I've seen you in them… I have a few ideas for them later."

"Really… I can only imagine what your mind is conjuring up Jack." She laughed as they walked towards the door. "I heard you mortified our daughter this morning."

"More like she mortified me. That's your fault." He opened the door and let her pass.

"How is that my fault?" She paused in the doorframe their bodies so close her belly was brushing against his.

"You've apparently passed on more then your stubborn tendencies." His brow furrowed as if truly disturbed by the thought causing Irina to laugh. "What were you thinking putting them in the same room, Irina?"

"Jack… when are you going to realize our little girl is all grown up? What sense does it make to put them in separate bedrooms? Would you rather have passed Vaughn in the hall last night as he was sneaking into Sydney's room while you were sneaking into mine?" She shook her head, chuckling at the visual that presented.

"No, that wouldn't have been good either, but I doubt it would have been any more embarrassing then our encounter this morning. I don't know how I am going to look her in the eye now."

"She's probably thinking the same thing about us, Jack. No child wants to hear about their parent's sex lives, let a lone have visuals. You're both equally mortified now, but you'll get over it." She tried to stifle another chuckle.

"You find this amusing don't you? And what are we standing out here for anyway?"

"I'm just sorry I missed the show and we're waiting for the car. Here it is now." She smiled as the black limousine pulled in front of them.

The older man from last night emerged from behind the driver's door and walked to the back to open the door for Irina.

"Good morning, Dmitri." Irina greeted the man in Russian with a smile.

"Good morning, Tsarina." He returned the greeting, kissing her hand as he guided her into the car.

The men nodded in acknowledgement of each other, but Jack could feel the cool under current in Dmitri's intense gaze as he guided Irina into the car and closed the door behind her.

"You're the one? The CIA agent?" Dmitri spoke in heavily accented English as he walked Jack around the back of the car to let him in the opposite door.

Jack nodded, suspicious but immediately feeling the 'protective' vibe coming from the older man.

"You were part of the team in Moscow?" His eyes boring heavily into Jack's.

"Yes." Jack answered truthfully.

"She almost bled to death in the back of my car that night. By all medical standards… she was dead." The old man looked pointedly at Jack, making sure he understood how serious it really was. "I don't know what your intentions are with our Tsarina… but I swore to her father that I would take care of her when she couldn't take care of herself, protect her when she was vulnerable… Do I need to protect her from you?" He paused with his hand on the door handle.

"No." Jack saw this man's fatherly instincts to protect Irina, who he obviously saw as a daughter, something Jack could appreciate being a father to a daughter himself.

"Good." The man smiled and opened the door for Jack.

"What was that all about?" Irina asked turning her attention to Jack once the door was shut. Recognizing the serious look on his face and hearing muffled conversation outside.

**_*Fumbling Towards Ecstasy *_**

"We were just clarifying some things." Jack turned his attention to the window, watching as they made their way down the drive. "Do you always travel in such style?" He asked looking around the inside of the limo, using her tactic of diversion to change the topic of discussion.

"No. Not always but," She looked down at her hand and then out the window. "I can't drive right now with my hand so it's just easier and safer for me this way. Lord knows I couldn't handle a stick shift right now."

"I don't know about that, I think you did all right last night." He smiled and she blushed turning her attention back to the window with a smile on her face. "Are you blushing, Irina Derevko?" He prodded stuffing a piece of toast into his mouth, smiling as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"Jack!" She scolded rolling her eyes and laughing when she saw him sitting there, with his cheeks full of toast so full of himself. "You're incorrigible, I swear." She stole the toast out of his hand, taking a bite for herself, then handed it back as she brushed the crumbs off her belly. Her hands coming to rest there feeling the baby kicking, she smiled. "Watch," She instructed Jack, taking her hands away to allow him to see her belly shake. "She has the hiccups." Irina smiled at him as her belly continued to shake every few seconds.

Jack was mesmerized by the movement but also with watching Irina's facial expressions soften and glow, smiling down at the baby inside her. "Does she have them often?"

"Not really. The last time she did was about a week ago, I guess. She kept me awake all night… It tickles in the strangest way, I can't explain." She smiled up at him.

"What was your reaction when you found out?" He asked hesitantly staring into her eyes.

"Surprise of course, shock… panic thinking about everything that happened to my body in those months I didn't realize I was pregnant, hoping I didn't do any damage… Once I realized she was ok, I was thrilled… and then scared," She spoke softly and looked sadly out the window, "Sad of course, when I realized you weren't going to be experiencing it with me…weren't going to be a part of her life." Her mind flashed back to the horrible night he berated her at the house. She forced those memories out of her head and managed a small smile in his direction. "Pretty much the same gauntlet of emotions I ran before when I was pregnant with the other two…" Her eyes met his in a silent understanding. "What about you? What was your reaction to finding out I was pregnant?"

"Honestly, the first thoughts I had were of anger, jealousy, and sadness because I immediately assumed you were carrying someone else's child… The thought that our one night together in twenty years could produce a baby never crossed my mind in those first few moments. When I realized that the baby was mine… I felt ashamed for jumping to conclusions but I was still angry that you didn't tell me… but then I realized you tried to," He tucked her hair behind her ear, "And it felt like a ton of bricks had landed on me. Looking at the photographs of the sonograms for the first time… I fell instantly in love with our child." He offered her a small smile, his hand resting on her shoulder with his body still angled towards hers. She reached out to hold his hand. "I also felt guilty and scared, worrying what damage I might have done when I shot you… and I was saddened at the possibility I wouldn't have the chance to be a part of this baby's life… Sad that I wouldn't get to experience this again with you. Worried about you… worrying about you having to go through this alone."

"Are you still angry with me for not telling you?"

"No," He brushed his hand over her cheek, cupping her face and rubbing his thumb along the smooth curve of her flesh. "My anger with you for not telling me lasted all of two seconds until I realized what an ass I'd been and then I didn't blame you for not telling me. I'm more angry with myself then anyone."

"What do you mean?"

"I never gave you a chance to explain anything to me… or to Sydney. I was blinded to the truth by my painful, jealous rage. All those years, I had come to picture Irina Derevko as this hideous monster who wasn't human, had no emotions, was a heartless killer…it was easier to see you that way and feel hate then to live with loving the woman who betrayed us. I forced myself to separate you, Irina, from the woman I loved for so many years, Laura… It made it possible for me to go on without you. Be able to still love my wife in a way and yet hate the person who took her away… I know it doesn't make a lot of sense now."

Irina could feel her eyes beginning to well with tears but she managed to keep them in and let him finish.

"It took me awhile to realize that you, Irina, were the same woman I fell in love with then and it was Sydney who pointed out how hypocritical it was of us to judge you for doing the same job we did and if we were in your position… we'd do the same. We're all players of the same game… we're just on different teams. I look at it this way, I can either keep moping around for the rest of my life miserable about what happened in the past… or I can let it go, except it for what it is… the past, and embrace my future. We've both made mistakes, everyone does…that's life. I can forgive yours… if you can forgive mine… I know it will take time, learning to trust each other again…but I'm willing to work at it if you are…"

"Are you certain about this, Jack?" She asked terrified he'd back out.

"The only thing I am certain of," He took her face in his hand and looked deeply into her dark eyes, on the verge of losing himself, "Is that I love you, Irina."

And with his admission that he was in love with her, 'her,' Irina, her tears finally began to fall and he brushed them away with his thumb while he held her face in his hands.

"You are my match, my equal, in every way and I can't imagine my life without you." He spoke softly. "What do you say? Will you try?"

"I say… I love you, Jack Bristow… I've always loved you and I will try anything to have a life with you and our daughters again."

Jack felt her trembling beneath him, "Are you scared?"

"Terrified." She admitted.

"Me too." And with that he leaned in and captured her lips in a long tender kiss, just borderline needy, with both wanting more, and knowing it wasn't the time or place.

The car pulled to a stop and the two broke apart. They had arrived at the clinic.

"We'll continue this later." Jack planted another quick kiss on her lips before Dmitri opened the door to let them out.

"Promise?" Irina raised her eyebrows at him suggestively with her gorgeous seductive smile as they walked to the front of the clinic.

"Oh yeah…It's going to be all, 'giddy up and ride me, Cowgirl." He smiled and Irina burst into laughter.

She hadn't seen this side of Jack in years and thought she'd never again. "Smartass!" She said under her breath as she walked by him while he held the door, bringing back some of their old banter.

"You love my ass." He smiled and whispered just under his breath.

"I love your ass." She nodded and pinched his butt causing him to jump a little.

Jack didn't have time to react before Irina was conversing heavily in Russian with the woman behind the desk and found himself suddenly very turned on, and very much falling in love with the woman in front of him speaking in her throaty native tongue. Something he never thought possible before.

They were shown immediately to a room, and Jack realized it was because they were the only ones there. The office hadn't officially opened yet, a security measure no doubt. The nurse excused herself after telling Irina to sit on the examination table and remove her jacket, while Jack took a seat on the stool.

Less then thirty seconds after the nurse left an older man entered, Jack presumed to be the doctor, and greeted Irina with a kiss to each cheek and a huge smile.

"Tsarina… My dear, it's been so long. How are you feeling?" His smile was bright and genuine as he walked around through the door. He finally noticed Jack sitting in the corner and eyed him suspiciously.

Irina saw the exchange and answered the question she knew Alexei was going to ask. "I'm feeling fine, Alexei." She responded in Russian. "And this is Jack." She pointed with her eyes and a head nod to Jack.

"The American?" He whispered unsure if Jack knew Russian, his eyes grew wide with shock.

"Yes." She smiled and continued speaking in Russian. "And he speaks Russian. Jack," She motioned for him to come over, "This is my doctor and trusted family friend, Alexei Valishnikov. Alexei, this is my…" She paused unsure exactly what to call him.

"Husband." Jack finished for her, with no hesitation extending his hand to shake with the older man. Once again stunning Irina with his words and actions.

"After all these years, we finally meet." Alexei returned the handshake, still in awe of the man standing before him. "I wasn't aware you were still married, My Dear." He smiled at her as he attached the pressure cuff to her arm.

"Neither were we until a few months ago." She returned the smile.

"You never cease to amaze me."

"You've known Irina for awhile then." Jack chuckled earning him a sharp look from Irina for teasing her, trying not to laugh.

"Since the day she was born." He smiled at Jack who's turn it was to be shocked. "The most gorgeous baby I've ever seen. She was breathtaking then and still is today."

"You delivered Irina?" Jack asked stunned with the white haired man in front of him.

"Yes, quite by accident. I was only twenty-two at the time and interning in my uncle's clinic when her mother came in ready to deliver. She was the first baby I ever delivered completely on my own and I've taken care of her ever since." He beamed, proud as any father might be helping Irina lie back on the table to prepare for her ultrasound. "I was such a nervous wreck that night. I had seen Anya coming in and out of the clinic every few weeks for her check-up and was completely smitten with her, so you can imagine how nerve wracking it would be to deliver the woman's baby." He laughed as he squirted the gel on Irina's belly. "She was so sweet though. Here she was the one giving birth and yet she was the one calming me down. She said she had complete faith in my abilities…sometimes I wonder if that were the truth or if she just wanted that baby out of her."

Irina and Jack both had to laugh at that.

"But she stuck with me and kept me on as the family's physician. They kept me pretty busy over the years but none like this one, I swear one of these days you're going to give me a heart attack showing up riddled with bullets and broken bones…"His expression changed from light hearted to concerned in a flash.

"I seem to have that effect on people." She teased with a smile looking back and forth between the two men. "Alexei performed my last surgery." She clarified for Jack tapping her chest and scar.

"It's a miracle you are alive, My Dear." Alexei looked pointedly at her over the glasses on the end of his nose, "Speaking of miracles, how is our little Grand Duchess doing?"

"She's great and obviously growing as you can see from the size of my belly."

"Yes, I can see, but you're still tiny compared to most pregnant mothers. And that concerns me." He moved the machine to give them a better view."You carry her very internally and that concerns me only in the fact that when it comes time to deliver, she will be pressing up against your lungs making it hard for anyone to breathe but especially you because of your injuries."

"Are you saying I have to have a C-section?" Irina asked and Jack took hold of her hand sensing her distress.

"Not necessarily but a possibility… I just want you to be prepared should that be the case."

Jack and Irina nodded feeling a little more relaxed.

_***Never Grow Old ***_

"Let's have a look at her, shall we?" Alexei smiled and moved the wand across her belly, the sounds of the heartbeat instantly filling the room. "There she is." He hovered the wand just above Irina's belly button and over the baby's face. She was sucking her thumb with one hand while the other was curled up next to her eye.

Jack felt his heart skip a beat watching his daughter on the screen for the first time. They never had a sonogram with Sydney so this was something new to him, watching his unborn child move about the screen while she was still inside Irina; "This is so amazing." Jack couldn't tear his eyes away from the screen and Irina smiled watching him in awe over their baby.

Alexei continued with the measurements, explaining everything that he was doing to Jack and Irina as he went along. "She's perfect. Absolutely perfect." He smiled when he finished.

Jack leaned down and kissed Irina lightly on the lips, letting his face linger just above her mouth before kissing her again, feeling an overwhelming sense of joy and love for her at the sight of their unborn baby.

"She's still smaller then I'd like, but that's not surprising considering everything." Alexei took a new photo of the baby, handing it to Irina. He wiped the gel from her belly and Jack helped her to sit up. "Congratulations, Child, you've made it into your Third Trimester. It won't be long now before we are welcoming her into the light." He took hold of Irina's good hand and gave a gentle squeeze. "Now… I will let Dr. Kuzhnetzov know you are here and waiting. Take care, My Dear." He kissed Irina's forehead, causing her to smile and nodded to Jack before making his exit.

"Who's Dr. Kuzhnetzov?" Jack resumed his seat on the stool.

"The surgeon who performed the initial surgery on my hand." She sighed, looking around the room, obviously nervous. Jack nodded and they waited in silence for the doctor.

A gorgeous man, roughly their same age, breezed into the room moments later.

"Good morning, Irina." He smiled at her taking a seat on the stool in front of the examine table, completely ignoring Jack. "It's been a while and look at this belly!" He reached out and placed a hand on her stomach causing Jack to feel a bit jealous. "How much longer now?"

"I've just started my seventh month." She looked over at Jack, seeing the jealousy brewing in his eyes and wanted to laugh at how preposterous it was. "Dr. Kuzhnetzov-" She began.

"Call me Sergei… please," He flashed her, his most charming smile, with his hand still on her stomach.

Jack wanted to reach out and choke the man for hitting on her, pregnant with another man's child none-the-less. Not that he could blame the man; she was gorgeous and was one of those women when pregnant that looked incredibly sexy.

"Ok, " she smiled politely, "Sergei… I'd like to introduce you to-"

"Her husband." Jack jumped out of the chair and grabbed the man's hand, shaking it firmly, sending a clear message to the doctor.

Irina continued to stare at Jack like he was an alien for his assertiveness at instituting his position as her husband.

"Husband?" Sergei raised his eyebrows but continued to smile. "And do you have a name 'husband'?"

"Jack."

"A pleasure, Jack. You are a very lucky man…to have such a strong, intelligent, beautiful woman take you as her husband."

'An insult to me hidden within a compliment to Irina, this man is good.' Jack thought himself.

"Easy on the hand, Jack," The good doctor pulled his hand away from Jack's death grip. "I'm a surgeon after all."

"Right… sorry." Jack smiled, feeling he showed his manliness, and resumed his seat on the stool.

"Let me have a look." Sergei picked up Irina's hand and began inspecting it while she shot a death glare over his shoulder to Jack. "Dr. Aguiar in Rio did an excellent job removing the pins. The bones have set well." He pushed his thumb into various points on Irina's hand. "Bend your fingers for me, please?"

Irina concentrated on her hand that was shaking with her efforts. She was only able to move her pinky and thumb fully; and sighed, frustrated, that her hand was shaking so badly and she couldn't move her fingers the way she wanted to.

"Try this." He placed a tennis ball in his palm, motioning her to pick it up.

She reached her hand out and tried to force her fingers to pick up the ball. They shook terribly and she tried again, this time she was able to pick it up by clasping her pinky and thumb around it, using the stiff rigid fingers in the middle to hold it there.

"Well that's one way." He smiled.

"Can you set it down?" He held is hand out again and she moved to release the ball with control but it fell from her hand and she looked absolutely defeated. "It's ok. Let me see your hand again." He ran the tip of his finger just under the tips of her three middle fingers. "Can you feel that?"

"No," she shook her head and Jack felt his heart sinking in his chest.

The doctor pinched the skin on the ends of her fingers with his fingernails. "How about this?"

Irina still shook her head 'no.'

The doctor sighed and forced her fingers into a bent position, causing Irina to cringe slightly, and when he released them they shot straight back out again. "I was afraid of this." He turned her hand over to inspect her palm. "I think some of this nerve damage may be permanent." He looked up slowly into her eyes and she nodded in understanding. "The knife severed too many major nerves. My hope is with time, they will regenerate and you will regain some feeling in those fingers. The reason you can't bend your fingers this way," He demonstrated with his own, bending them against his palm, "Is because the tendons and ligaments that run along the top of your hand have healed too tightly. After the baby is born, I should be able to go in and correct that problem. You're seeing a physical therapist for your chest injury aren't you?"

"Yes." She spoke softly.

"Good, I'll add some exercises to the plan to work your hand and fingers as well." Seeing the concern in her eyes he added, "I know you're concerned Irina but you've already come along way. When I first saw the damage, I thought you would lose your entire hand… You've managed to keep it… remember that. Time will heal the rest." He smiled genuinely.

_***Everything ***_

When he left the room, Jack silently handed Irina her jacket, knowing she needed some space. She smiled and he followed her to the car.

As soon as they were on the go again Jack felt the need to break the silence. "So what's next on the agenda?"

"I have to stop at the University." She continued looking out the window, still lost in thought.

Jack wasn't sure why she needed to stop at the University, nor did he care at the moment. He could see her withdrawing into herself, lost in thought, in another time… another place.

"Irina…where are you right now?" He asked softly, already having an idea.

She closed her eyes and shook her head as if trying to rid the images she was seeing there.

"No place I want to be." She tried to offer him a fake smile. "It's nothing."

"You're thinking about Cuvee… aren't you?" He brushed his fingers over her cheek, tucking her hair behind her ear.

The corners of Irina's mouth turned up at how well Jack was reading her mind but she said nothing.

"We need to talk about that… about him." He felt her tense immediately. "He and Sloane are still after you."

Her eyes dropped to the picture of the baby, her finger's tracing the sweet outline. "Here," She looked up at Jack and handed him the photo. "You can have it. A photo for you to take with you when you leave."

"Irina-" Jack knew she was changing the subject from Cuvee.

"Jack, I don't want to talk about it right now." She snapped, instantly feeling guilty for her tone. "Please," The look in her eyes pleading for understanding.

Jack saw her struggle, and for now… he let it go, they would come back to that later. He nodded in silent understanding. He also knew she was right; he would have to leave in a couple days. "Thank you." He smiled softly, looking down at the photo and then to Irina. "Are you sure… you don't want keep it?"

"I'll make a copy before you go." She returned the smile and then fell silent.

The car stopped before they had a chance to discuss his leaving any further, leaving something else they would have to return to. Dmitri came around to the side and opened the door, extending his hand to Irina. She stepped out and took a deep breath of the cool, crisp air, wrapping her arms around her chest, warding off the cold… waiting for Jack to make his way around the car.

'St. Petersburg State University,' Jack interpreted as he glanced at the enormous structure in front of him.

Feeling him just behind her, Irina reached her hand out, waiting for Jack to take it. Jack saw the gesture and gladly slipped his hand around her long slender fingers, relishing in the feeling of holding hands walking up a University's steps again while students whizzed by them. Something they used to do so many years ago.

"It's been a long time." She squeezed his hand, reading his mind, smiling. "This was always one of my favorite things about the morning."

"One' of your favorites?" Jack smirked, remembering some 'favorites' of his own.

"Like I said, 'One' of my favorites." She smiled and raised her eyebrow suggestively.

They continued up the steps and through a large corridor, entering a secretarial office for the Dean of the school. Jack still had no idea what they were doing there but figured he would realize soon enough. The desk was empty as they entered the room, but a large wooden door opened and out stepped two women.

The taller one was approximately in her late twenties with dark brown hair and glasses, she was carrying a legal pad and pen and nodded with an enormous smile at Irina before resuming her place behind her secretarial desk. The other woman, a little shorter then Irina, and about the same age with blonde hair and blue eyes, flew into Irina's arms at first sight.

"Irina!" She exclaimed hugging her with full force that Jack could tell was a bit uncomfortable with Irina's current state. "It's been so long! Where have you been, I missed you last fall, you sent Peter, which was fine and look at you! You're pregnant!" Rattling in Russian, she stepped back, holding Irina's hands, smiling and marveling at Irina's new girth.

"Sasha, my friend, it has been too long." Irina smiled warmly. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to be here last fall but I was a little 'detained," She looked pointedly at Jack with a smirk, thinking about her time in the glass cell in CIA custody. "Sasha, I would like you to meet my husband," Irina turned and smiled at Jack, following his cue from earlier in the day that it was the title he wanted, "Jack."

Jack extended his hand to the woman, "It's a pleasure." He responded in Russian.

"The pleasure's all mine." She beamed brightly before turning her head back to Irina. "All these years you've been coming here…" She let the comment trail off, eyeing Jack once more. "Where ever have you been keeping him?"

Irina laughed, "I would love to fill you in on that entirely long story, but I am afraid we are in a bit of a hurry. I have to be at Peterhof at 10:30."

Sasha glanced down at her watch, "Then we'd best get to it, you only have forty-five minutes."

They followed her into the large office and took their seats in the two large leather armchairs in front of Sasha's desk. As soon as she sat down, Sasha pushed an enormous pile of manila folders, stacked neatly, towards Irina. "This is all of them. The other Dean's had theirs sent over last week and the ones from Moscow arrived just this morning."

"How many this year?" Irina opened one of the folders on the top, glancing at the student's profile.

"Two hundred and fifty-three new ones."

Irina nodded and continued to leaf through the folders, one by one. "How are 'my other kids' doing?" She asked without looking up.

Jack's curiosity was getting the best of him trying to figure out what was going on and who were these kids Irina was staking a claim to?

"They all have remarkable scores… these kids are amazing. They are all doing so well. These are all your copies." Sasha passed numerous stacks of color-coded folders to Irina.

Irina's eyes were beaming as any proud parent would, looking over their test scores. "I'm so proud of them."

"Oh," Sasha jumped up and made her way around the desk, "I almost forgot." She retrieved a box from the bookshelf and set it on Jack's lap, chuckling when he made a, 'hmmph' noise when she dropped the heavy weight on him unsuspectingly. "They all wrote copious amounts of 'Thank You' letters to their anonymous donor. These are all for you. They all needle me incessantly to find out who you are… I tell them nothing, like you asked, except that it is a gift from the 'Mother of Russia,' on my own accord of course." She smiled at Irina before resuming her seat. "Some of them are getting pretty close to the truth with their wild theories about who or what that could mean… I wish you could be here, Irina… To see their faces when I tell them they have nothing to worry about anymore. Their living and school expenses… their tuition, have all been paid for. The moment of sheer joy as they bounce around my office, hugging me madly… thanking me for making their dreams come true while other's simply faint." She laughed and Jack finally understood.

_***Bleed To Love Her ***_

"But I feel so guilty… experiencing their joy, hearing their words of 'Thanks,' because it is not me who is making their dreams possible… it is you, Irina. It's such a great gift you give them."

"I don't see it as a gift, I see it as an investment, an investment in Russia to educate their brilliant young minds. It only hurts 'us' and our future as a country if we only allow those with substantial funds to attend University… we'd be losing some of the best minds." Irina sighed as she rattled on, "The best doctors and teachers, the best scientists and artists… and that all begins with an excellent education."

Jack was astounded by what he was hearing coming from Irina's mouth and yet he wasn't. 'Education of the youth and the success of a nation,' this was something he knew 'Laura' was passionate about which was why she was such an excellent teacher. Hearing the same words fall from Irina's lips only served to remind him once more, that 'they' were indeed the same and Irina hadn't lied about her passions back then.

"I couldn't agree more," Sasha twirled the pen in her fingers, "But it takes a remarkable individual to physically put those ideals into motion and see the change."

"Do you have the lists?" Irina pretended to ignore Sasha's last statement, wanting to take the focus off her self.

"Yes, I do." Sasha shook her head, smiling to herself at Irina's dismissal of any type of praise. She opened a drawer in her desk and removed yet another file and handed it to Irina.

"They just finished the addition to the library here, the sky light is stunning you should stop and see it… and they finished the one in the Medical Institute as well. The books and the space are wonderful but the leather beanbag chairs have been an enormous hit with the students. All hours of the day and night they are lounging around reading in them. That was a great idea."

"I can't tell you how many times I was stuck in the library studying when I was a student, and wishing for something like that…Something that wasn't so constrictive and hard as those old wooden chairs and tables would seem after three or four hours in them. I always thought I spent more time thinking about how uncomfortable I was then I did actually absorbing and thinking about what I was supposed to be studying."

Irina laughed at the memory and Jack could instantly picture her there, behind those big wooden desks with the green lamps, rubbing her aching shoulders. A sight he'd seen many times and could relate to.

"I'll look over all the requests and either stop back or send a courier next week. If you have any other requests just let me know." Irina placed the file in the box Jack was holding and moved to stand, as did Sasha.

"Actually I do have one more request," Sasha walked around the front of the desk to stand in front of Irina once more, "It's the same as always I'm afraid… I still want to have you teach our Russian and English Literature classes, you wouldn't by chance, have changed your mind and are ready to accept, would you?" She smiled in a way that Irina knew she was serious but still joking with her all at the same time.

Irina's only response at her persistence of the matter was to shake her head 'no' and laugh.

"No?" Sasha feigned mock disappointment, "Well, there will always be wishful thinking on my part, that one day, you will accept! You are still the only person I know who can quote the likes of Shakespeare, Hemmingway, and Tolstoy."

'Yeah, and she can also throw knives, kill with her bare hands and leap off tall buildings in a single bound,' Jack wanted to say and stifled a chuckle as Irina picked up a stack of files and placed them on top of Jack's box, adding to its weight, before picking up the remaining pile to carry herself.

"Sasha, it was a pleasure seeing you again. I can always count on you for a laugh. I wish we had more time." Irina smiled sweetly at the woman, placing a kiss to each other's cheeks in the Russian tradition, before making her way towards the door.

"Would you like help out?" Sasha held the door as Jack and Irina passed her, arms loaded with files.

"It's not necessary." Irina chuckled, "I brought my work horse with me today." She winked at Jack behind her. "Goodbye, Sasha."

"Goodbye, Tsarina." She smirked and Irina's head flew around. "Take care and God Bless you and yours."

Before Irina could offer a retort the office door had closed, leaving Irina chuckling at the woman and her comments. The thought of God blessing her, some how seemed absurd considering all she'd done in her life. But then again, she had her family back, sort of, and was expecting a healthy baby girl… those were certainly blessings. 'Did that mean she was on her way to absolution with God? If he was granting her these blessings?'

They walked down the corridor and Irina held the door open for Jack to pass, smiling madly at him with her deliciously seductive smile.

Jack's smiled immediately ceased in concern seeing a man approaching Irina with obvious determination in his eye. He'd obviously been waiting for her.

Irina saw the man and immediately tensed, feeling vulnerable with her arms full and pregnant. He stopped just two feet from Irina.

"I know who you are." He was staring intently into Irina's eyes.

"What do you mean?" Irina smiled trying to remain calm.

"You're the one. The one who anonymously pays for people's tuition… Educating Russia," He leaned in and took the stack of files from Irina, holding them for her while he remained rooted to the ground. "The Mother of Russia' as they call you and now I know why… took me awhile to figure it out… but the pieces slowly started coming together, I've seen you here… almost every year, getting these files… and now the 'Thank You' box… You're the one." He repeated in awe, a slow smile coming to his face. "The Romanov." Seeing the look flash across Irina's face he quickly added, "Don't worry… your secret is safe with me. I just wanted to 'Thank you' in person." He smiled. "I'm in one of those files. Nicholas Petrinkov."

Irina smiled and felt a sigh of relief flooding her.

"You've made my dreams a reality. I'm in my fourth year of medical school now, on my way to being a cardiac surgeon and if not for you… I would still be in Siberia… herding sheep." He laughed at the mental image causing Jack and Irina to chuckle with him. "I just wanted to say 'Thank you.'" He sobered, "What you've done… has and will change my family's life forever… I will never be able to repay you for that." He choked out causing Irina to get teary eyed in her pregnant state.

"Nicholas, do you really want to know how you can repay me?" She looked intently in to the young man's eyes, reaching out to touch his arm when he nodded. "Do your best. Continue to study hard and become the best cardiac surgeon you can be. Take care of yourself, your family and those less fortunate. That's all I ask in return."

"I promise. I will." He smiled through unshed tears.

"Good." She reached out to take the files from him once again.

"I'll help you carry them to your car." He started walking down the steps and Irina shrugged to Jack, why not let the man carry the heavy files if he wanted.

Jack continued to stare at her in his own private 'awe,' causing her to glance nervously at him every few seconds.

When they reached the bottom, Dmitri was waiting with the car and he took the files from Nicholas. He extended his hand to help Irina into the waiting car and Irina reached up and kissed his cheek before pulling him in for a hug, surprising Jack, him and herself.

"I can never say, 'Thank you' enough. I'll keep my promise." He whispered into her hair before pulling away. She smiled and made her way into the car, closing the door after her, and stood on the curb with his hands in his pockets watching them drive away.

When the young man was no longer visible, she turned her attention back to Jack who was still staring at her with a bewildering look on his face.

"What? Why do you keep looking at me like I have two heads?" She cocked her head staring at him with her steely eyes.

"You just continuously surprise me. So many things I don't know about you. You continuously amaze me. Just when I think I've you figured out… Life with you could never be described as boring." He was quiet for a moment then smiled, his eyes never leaving hers. "You hugged him."

"Are you jealous again?"

"Again?" Jack cocked his head to mimic hers. "When were you under the mistaken delusional impression that I was jealous previously?"

"Oh come on, Jack! You practically leapt off the stool this morning when Dr. Kuzhnetsov asked me to call him Sergei." She wanted to laugh at him in his denial.

"He was groping you! Putting his hands all over your stomach!" Jack moved his hands around in circular motions like he was caressing her belly wildly, his nostrils flaring.

"Jack, he is my doctor." She stated flatly, goading him and enjoying it.

"He was hitting on you! I'm a man; I know how his mind works. I know what he was thinking."

"And what was that?"

"He was thinking you're an incredibly gorgeous, sexy pregnant woman. And being a doctor, he realizes that a pregnant 'you' probably has crazy hormones and 'animalistic' tendencies while you're pregnant, which he would be correct in that assessment. He's no fool. His only mistake was trying it in front of me."

"Jack… you have nothing to worry about." She tried not to laugh and placed her hand on his knee.

"I'm not worried." His reply was a little too quick to be convincing. "And I'm not jealous."

"Ok, whatever then." She gave up.

"And you never answered my question." Jack interjected immediately wanting to take the focus off him.

"He was a good looking doctor, why not?" Her eyes never wavering, she could play this stubborn jealous game too.

"Oh please, he's Sydney's age. He's young enough to be your son."

"What do you want to know, Jack?" Irina raised her voice growing tired of his prodding. "I hugged him because, you're right. He 'could' be my son and I can relate to where he's coming from. A family with nothing, struggling to survive; wanting to break out of the vicious cycle of being held down because of your station in life. And I hugged him because I'm pregnant and hormonal, as you just kindly pointed out, and I felt like it! Ok?" Her voice was rising in decibel as she went on.

Now it was Jack's turn to feel bad for goading her. Braving her potential wrath, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her body towards his, her temple to his lips. "Ok," He smiled and felt her relax a little under him. "How long have you been doing this? Funding and supporting these kids… the universities?" He kept her body close to his, his head leaning into hers while she looked out the window.

She let out a heavy sigh, leaning back and relaxing fully into his embrace. "Since the fall of the Soviet Union and their system of 'free' education."

"That's almost thirteen years. You've been doing this for thirteen years?" Jack was shocked, mentally calculating in his head the expense of it all.

"Yes."

"That's got to be over $240 million by now you've given away."

"I don't look at it that way. I see the 3,300 kids who are helping to ensure a positive future for Russia. It truly is an investment. The best investment one can make is education."

"No, I agree with you completely. I just… I think you're remarkable for doing this."

"Not remarkable, resourceful."

Jack looked at her inquisitively waiting for her to explain.

"The majority of the money that's paying for these kids to become doctors, lawyers, teachers, scientists… is money from my organization…Russian Mafia money as you would say."

"This is what Katya was referring to when she came to the house…she said you were funneling 'that' money back into Russia to help the people." Jack nodded in understanding.

"Yes… through education and health care… many different ways. A public funding of sorts until Russia gets back on her feet again. That's the reason I started my organization… to take back what belonged to my family and use the mafia to help my people by ascertaining a certain level of control over the government. Under Soviet rule, life was restricting but there was order. When the Soviet Union fell, everything went spiraling out of control and people were suddenly starving. Something had to be done."

Jack remembered those days not so long ago and images of families digging through landfills for food fleeted across his mind. "So the government obviously knows about you."

"We have an arrangement." Irina spoke softly, raising her eyebrow that suggested there was more to that answer she wasn't willing to reveal. She turned her attention back to the window.

His gaze followed hers out the window watching the beautiful streets and canals of St. Petersburg go by, something he'd never taken the time to observe and appreciate while on missions in country. "I must say, I've been to Russia at least a hundred times over the years, yet this feels like the first. I suppose its because, for the first time, I am really seeing it, seeing its beauty…because of you. Seeing it through your eyes." He tilted her face towards him with his fingers, looking deeply into her eyes.

"I felt the same way when I came to the U.S., I didn't really see the beauty of America… until I saw it through your eyes." Irina's voice was slightly shaky, hearing Jack's admission, answering with her own honest reply. Jack took the opportunity to lean in and kiss her gently.

Once again, their moment was interrupted when the car stopped as they reached their intended destination. The large golden gates opened and Jack's face was nothing but awe as the car made its way up the paved drive past golden statues, fountains and lakes to stop in front of two grand staircases leading to an enormous palace.

"Welcome to Peterhof." Irina looked over her shoulder towards Jack as she accepted Dmitri's hand in exiting the limo.


	15. Chapter 15

**_AN: For the record, I have absolutely no political enthusiasm for the figure listed below in control of Russia. His character is for story purposes only. In real life, I feel less than enthused by the man._**

**_Music for this chapter (on repeat): Clocks by Coldplay, Return to Innocence _****by Enigma****_, The Russian Lullaby _****by Lorie Line****_, Mother and Child Reunion_**** by Paul Simon****_, There She Goes _****by The La's****_, From Russia with Love _****by Matt Monro from James Bond Soundtrack****_, Anastasia (techno trance mix) _****by Anastasia on Dream Dance Vol. 12.**

* * *

FIFTEEN

o

Jack exited the opposite side of the car and paused briefly, resting his arm on the roof of the car to take in the spectacular sight before him. Peterhof Palace.

Irina inhaled deeply, enjoying the smell of the evergreen trees mixing with the smell of the sea. After being locked up for so long, she never missed the opportunity to stop and smell 'fresh air.'

"This is all yours' too?" Jack asked while they made their way up the steps, Irina's arm nestled in the crook of his as he helped her to the top.

"Mine… and Katya's," She swayed her head to the side, her head mimicking the sway of tones in her voice. "Though, it's mostly open for the public and tourists now. Everyone should be able to enjoy the beauty of this place." She smiled, nodding towards the beautiful fountains and statues lining the steps. "Someone should be enjoying it… I never seem to have the time to."

A man in a black business suit appeared at the top of the stairs, an immediate smile gracing his lips, hurrying down the steps to greet Irina, taking hold of her other arm. "Irina," He smiled and nodded at Jack acknowledging him, "Why aren't you using the elevator you just had us install?" He laughed.

"I'm pregnant not disabled, Illiyah." She gave him her stern, stubborn glare followed by that seductive smile that made every man who encountered her weak in the knees and fall madly in love with her. The man laughed and shook his head. "Illiyah, this is my husband, Jack. Jack, this is my fantastic head contractor, Illiyah." Referring to Jack as her husband, easily rolling off her tongue now after so many introductions this morning.

The men acknowledged one another again with nods and curt smiles once they'd reached to top. Walking past several workers washing windows and grounds keepers they entered through the main doors of the palace.

The sharp intake of breath from Irina let Jack know she was just as captivated by the massive foyers beauty as he was.

"It looks incredible, Illiyah, you did a marvelous job."

The man beamed with pride as she began walking around surveying the room. "We are completely finished with the restoration now, I am so pleased you are happy with it. After so many years of working on it, I am sad to see it end."

"Ah yes, but we still have so much left to do with Pavlovsk, Yelagin, Gatchina, St. Catherine's and of course, finishing Alexander."

"Yes," he laughed, "We do."

Jack meandered around the room as Irina and Illiyah were in deep conversation looking over plans and talking about fountains, groundwork and trees for the next twenty minutes with Irina putting her signature on several forms.

When they were finished, Illiyah collected the papers and said, 'Goodbye,' leaving Jack and Irina alone in the large room.

"Would you like to see my favorite place here?" Irina snaked her arms around Jack from behind, her quiet breath tickling his ear.

"Of course, though I don't know how you could choose a favorite with this entire place being so spectacular."

She led him by the hand down the long foyer towards the enormous glass windows on the opposite end.

_***Clocks ***_

This time it was Jack's turn to inhale sharply taking in the sight before him as he stood on the landing over looking the endless gardens, and lakes before him, stretching to the Baltic Sea. It was something in a fairy tale come-to-life. This palace had always been compared with that of the French Versailles and now it was more then obvious why.

"Peterhof… is called the place of dreams." She whispered and began leading him down the stairs for a walk through the gardens.

The park had just opened to the public for the day and people started pouring in setting up picnic baskets, reading, jogging, and playing Frisbee. They walked along in a long companionable silence, holding hands and observing the people who were enjoying their Saturday morning. Maintaining a certain distance for safety reasons.

"So what are you dreams, Irina?" Jack finally asked taking a seat on the bench over looking the sea.

"Oh, I don't know," she sighed sitting heavily next to him.

"In the letter you wrote… the poem that was swimming around in your head while you were a prisoner in Kashmir… you said you had a thousand dreams. What are they?" He saw the flash of sadness across her features at the mention of the horrible place.

"So many of them have changed… yet the most important ones remain. I wished that you and Sydney would be safe, that one day… we would find each other again."

"And we have." Jack brushed the hairs blowing in her face from the light breeze behind her ear.

"Sometimes… I wished for death… others I wished that I would that I would escape or at least find a way to survive in there without losing my mind."

"And you did…" Jack's hands caressed Irina's soft hands, holding them in her lap. Rubbing the backs of them to comfort her and him self.

"Other times I wished that you would realize I wasn't dead, somehow forgive me and find a way to save me."

"I would-"

"It's ok, Jack…" She interrupted him, knowing there was no way either of them could change the past. "Many times…" she paused for a long moment lost in her thought, "I dreamt of the ways I would kill Cuvee…"

"Why did you work with him… after you were released from prison?" Jack wasn't accusing her; he just wanted to understand her motives.

"I had resigned myself to the fact that I was never going to have my family back and working with Cuvee, was a means to an end. I was using him; he was using me…we were both trying to get to the same goal. The only thing I had left in my life."

"Rambaldi?" Jack clarified and Irina nodded. "So what changed?"

"Sydney." Her smile was so easy and heartfelt, the truth found in such simple words. "Do you remember… when Sydney was little and you would come home from a long mission, she was so possessive of you. For those first hours, she wanted you and only you and your undivided attention. She will always be 'your' little girl. You will always he her 'daddy."

Jack thought back to the first time, in a long time that Sydney had called him 'Daddy.' It was in that parking garage when he had to save her from the SD-6 assassins, her words still ringing around in his head. 'Daddy? Daddy, you have a gun!' She had been so surprised to see him as she had yet to learn who he really was.

Irina broke his thoughts, "All little girls are like that. It was the same for my father…with letting me join the KGB… and then… when I was moving to the U.S."

Jack could see why that would worry her father. He felt the same way when Sydney had joined SD-6 at nineteen years old. But if he were in Irina's father's situation… and it was his seventeen year old, working as a spy, moving to the enemy country in a time of war to live with and marry the enemy, for years… There was no way Jack could handle that; he knew he'd have a coronary at just the thought. "What happened to your father? I haven't heard you mention what happened to him." His words were soft as he put his arm around Irina's shoulders and leaned back into the bench.

"He died of a heart attack the day he found out I was arrested and put in prison for treason." She spoke steadily, her gaze never leaving the blackened sea in front of them.

Jack felt his heart skip a beat remembering his earlier thought.

"Losing my mother… having me shipped off to prison, proved to be too much." She fell silent, her eyes still on the horizon of the sea. "I was able to spend a couple of days with him, just after I returned. I had a feeling… on that day I left, that when I said 'goodbye' it would be forever."

"How or when did you find out?"

"It came out in an electroshock torture session. They were using it as a manipulation to break me down. Telling me I murdered my parents. My mother, with my refusal to leave you and Sydney, and my father with the shame of finding out his daughter was nothing but a 'traitorous whore' I believe is what he said."

"He as in, Cuvee."

"Yes." Irina's mind instantly flashing back to that moment in time; sending a shiver coursing through her body.

Jack's arm instinctively pulled her in closer and he kissed her temple, resting his hand over hers positioned atop her belly, "He's still after you…"

"And he won't stop until he finds me, I know." She turned her sad eyes to look deeply into Jack's.

"Then we have to find him first." Jack stated firmly, touching her cheek, as he searched the deep dark pools of her eyes. Not allowing him self to think about the possibility of what would happen if they didn't.

* * *

Sydney and Vaughn had enjoyed a late morning in bed and when they'd finally managed to make their way downstairs, Katya had breakfast waiting for them while they talked for at least an hour with idle chitchat, mostly about the palace and the surrounding grounds.

After eating, they'd decided they had wanted to take a look around outside and Katya told them that if they got lost, walk in one direction until they hit the perimeter fence and follow it back to the palace. She really didn't think she needed to explain this to them, they were spies after all, but threw the information out there none-the-less remembering her sister's words of keeping an eye out for them.

Jack and Irina had returned just in time to see a laughing Sydney and Vaughn strolling up to the house, soaking wet and shivering, muddy and covered in sea grass.

"What the hell happened to you two?" Jack asked with a scowl while Irina looked on thoroughly amused and curious.

"We found the lake… and the row-boat. We sort of fell in." Sydney tried to respond seriously but couldn't keep the smile from gracing her lips as she looked nervously at Vaughn, whom Jack was interrogating with his eyes.

"Sort of fell in,' how the hell can you sort of fall in if you're in a row boat?"

"Um… we were rocking it." Sydney's body shook trying to keep from laughing, her mother doing much the same while Jack's cheeks reddened once more.

"You two are freezing, get inside before you catch a cold." Irina decided to save the situation and put her hands on Sydney's, and Vaughn's arms, rubbing them and guiding them through the front door, all the while Jack continued to glare at Vaughn.

"Oh stop it, Jack!" Irina whispered over her shoulder as they passed by, "I seem to remember you and I rocking a few boats and capsizing them in our time… And then there was that time you pushed me into the reflecting pool in front of the Lincoln memorial…Um-hmm, I see you remember." She threw that seductive smile with a cocked eyebrow back at him as Jack began to blush for a whole new reason.

"Why don't you go upstairs, take a warm shower and meet us back down here for some lunch, ok?"

Sydney threw her mother an appreciative glance, took Vaughn by the hand, and ran upstairs.

When they were no longer in sight, Irina turned back to Jack, seductive smile still in tact.

"First you put them in the same room, then you suggest they take 'a warm shower' as in singular. What are you trying to do to me here woman?"

"Awe, Jack!" She burst out laughing. "Have a little fun." She tugged on the waistband of his pants with one finger teasingly.

"I was having fun," He ran his hand through her hair before breaking into a broad grin, "Giving that boy a hard time." He leaned in and kissed her, what was meant to be a light kiss turned heated in seconds. "Hey where you going?" Jack captured Irina's arm as she pulled out of his embrace.

"As much as I would to continue this, right here on the marble floor of the foyer… we're," She placed her hand over her belly, "Starving. I'll need lots of energy for what I have in store for you later. A tigress must have 'lots' of energy before she goes out on a hunt." She winked, "Food now, fun later." She planted a quick kiss on his lips, grabbed his hand and dragged him to the kitchen in search of food and Katya.

Fifteen minutes later, Vaughn and Sydney joined them in dining room just off the kitchen, much to everyone's surprise.

Lunch had been filled with talk of the baby, where Jack pulled out the new picture for everyone to marvel and Irina filled Katya in on what was happening with the renovations of the palaces.

When they were finished eating Irina began clearing the table while Sydney took notice of the numerous photographs on the wall. She recognized herself in many of them.

"Oh my God, Mom, is this you?" Sydney pointed to a black and white photo of an adorable three year old with ringlets wearing what appeared to be overalls and the traditional navy blue and white-stripped shirt of the Russian navy sailor.

_***Return To Innocence***_

Jack, Vaughn, and Katya turned their attention to the wall of photographs to see what Sydney was pointing to.

Katya smiled and joined Sydney at the wall. "Ah yes, this is one of my favorite pictures of Rina." Katya traced the outline of her sister's cherubic face as a toddler.

Irina smiled as she continued to clear the table, letting Katya do the narrating of the photos on the wall.

"We were on holiday in Sochi, on the Black Sea. Those dimples and mischievous eyes, she looks exactly like our mother at the same age, see." She pointed to another photograph of a little girl in a sailors dress near the one of Irina. The resemblance was uncanny and Sydney's face lit up at seeing the newly discovered photos of her mother and grandmother.

"You look just like her." Sydney turned to smile as Irina came and stood beside her.

"Yes, but you look how much you look like her here." Irina pointed to a photograph of Anastasia at around eleven years old, looking strikingly similar to Sydney now.

Sydney felt tears coming to her eyes at the first real connection she saw between herself and her grandmother. Sydney continued to scan the photos, seeing several of her mother, grandmother, and Katya that she recognized from the video and yet others she'd never seen. "Who's this?" Sydney was transfixed on the fairly recent photograph of an impossibly good-looking guy in his twenties.

"My son Sergei." Katya beamed proudly, before pointing to another photograph near by. "And this is my daughter Sophia. They are twins."

The Derevko/Romanov traits were easily seen in both children.

"I have cousins? First cousins?" Sydney was shocked, surprised and thrilled.

"Yes!" Katya's eyes danced with laughter.

"I always wanted cousins." Syd returned her gaze to the wall. "How old are they?"

"Twenty-three almost twenty-four."

"They're beautiful and does he have blue eyes?" Sydney leaned in further to inspect her cousin.

"Yes, he gets those from his father. They actually look more like our uncle Alexei then anyone else… especially Sophia, she has his eyes." Katya pointed out another photograph of the young Tsarevich Alexei in uniform.

Jack could tell by the look on Sydney's face how much she was enjoying this, learning about her family, and seeing for the first time… she felt like she belonged.

"They will be most excited to meet you. They should arrive later this afternoon." Katya smirked catching the surprised look on her sister's face.

"They're coming?" Irina exhaled breathlessly.

"I felt it was time for them to meet their aunt and cousin."

"You've never met them?" Sydney looked to her mother in surprise.

"No… I've seen them… but I've never met them." She could only observe them from a far as she had to do with Sydney since she and Katya had rarely spoken until recently.

"They're on a flight from Rome now, and they're thrilled to finally meet you… both."

"They live in Italy?"

"Yes, Sergei is in medical school in Rome and Sophia is modeling in Milan."

"Like her mother." Irina pointed to a beautiful photo of Katya.

"And Sydney like hers." Katya smiled referring to the fact that just as her daughter had followed her into modeling, Irina's daughter followed her into espionage.

"I knew you seemed familiar when I first saw you! You were the Lancôme model!" Sydney's eyes widened with the realization.

"Yes." Katya smiled shyly. "Much to the disappointment of the Soviet Government who wanted me to follow in my sister's footsteps into the KGB. I was the rebel I guess."

"Imagine my surprise when I opened my "Redbook" magazine and saw my little sister staring back at me. My students were in the middle of a final exam when I started squealing with delight. I'm pretty sure they thought I was crazy after that." Irina shook her head and laughed at the memory. "It was just so surreal to see my baby sister all grown up and so beautiful." She paused for a moment. "I'm going to get us some dessert."

Just after Irina left the room, a photo just over Katya's shoulder caught Sydney's eye and she practically lunged past her aunt to get a better view. "Is this who I think it is?" She whipped her head back to look at her aunt. It was a photo of her mother wearing Soviet running clothes standing between two men, Sydney's finger rapidly pointing to the man at the left.

"Ah yes, Vladimir. He was at the academy with Rina." Katya smiled, "He was always smitten with her…still is."

"Vladimir?" Jack was confused.

"Putin!" Sydney shouted back shock written all over her face.

"What?" The word had barely left Sydney's lips before Jack had flown out of his chair to see the photo for himself.

"What, 'what?" Irina entered carrying a tray of dessert.

"Have an arrangement with the government…' you said, well that certainly is an understatement! All this time you've been chummy with the Russian President and you said nothing!" Jack's voice rising to the point he was yelling.

"Yes, I know Vladimir." Irina sighed and set the tray carefully on the table.

"Why is it that you only confirm the truth after we happen to stumble upon it?"

"Jack," Irina spoke calmly trying not to lose her temper, "You've been here less then twenty-four hours… I'm sorry if I am not giving you all the answers you want fast enough… but I'm trying. If that's not good enough for you… well then, I'm sorry." She hugged her chest, comforting herself, and shrugged before turning to leave the room.

Katya looked away, feeling guilty that she had some how brought this on, while Sydney stared at Jack, nostrils flaring, fuming over his outburst at her mother. She sent one nasty glance his way before leaving to find Irina.

"She is trying, Jack," Katya sighed and resumed her seat dishing out the dessert to Jack and Vaughn, who remained silent in his chair. "Yes, my sister is very cryptic at times, but you have understand… the only person she's been able to trust for the last two decades, is herself."

Jack instantly felt guilty for resulting to old habits of jumping down Irina's throat. Had he thought before jumping to conclusions, he would have realized the validity of Irina's words on his own. "I need to go find her."

He moved to leave and Katya grabbed his arm, much the same way Irina had always done.

"Let Sydney have a few minutes with her. She'll be ok. Now sit. Eat. I guarantee you've never eaten anything as delectably sweet as this."

With a heavy sigh, Jack took a seat.

* * *

Sydney found Irina sitting silently in front of a large Grand piano, the only object in the enormous room except for the chairs lining the walls, the soft light of day, flooding the room from the many windows around the room. Sydney hesitated momentarily before walking up beside Irina.

"Is this seat taken?" She asked softly, nodding in the direction of the space next to Irina on the bench.

"No, of course not." Irina gave her a small smile though it didn't quite reach her eyes. She moved to the side and Sydney took a seat.

"Dad shouldn't have yelled at you." She spoke softly.

"It's ok, Sydney."

"No, its not. He 'is' trying."

"I know." She placed her hand on Sydney's, effectively ending any further conversation on the topic. "It's been a long time… since you and I sat here, like this. I always loved to hear you play the piano."

Sydney's fingers traced lightly over the keys.

"Do you still play?" Irina had been hopeful that her daughter had continued on learning after her departure.

Sydney nodded that she did. "I kept playing because it was a way I could hold onto a part of you… when I thought you died." She added softly.

"The last thing I heard you play, was 'Mary Had A Little Lamb.'" Irina smiled wistfully remembering the six year olds triumphant dance when she first played it from memory.

"Do you… still play?"

"I did," Irina looked sadly at her hand before returning her gaze to Sydney's just in time to see the fallen look on her daughter's face; that was not what she intended. "I will again." She smiled with determination. "Not to worry, Sweetheart. Now, can I hear you play something? Please?"

"I haven't played in a long time… What should I play?"

"Whatever you want." Irina was eagerly anticipating seeing how far her daughter had come as a pianist.

"I know." Sydney smiled and placed her hands on the keys, "I played this for my Christmas recital when I was ten... because I used to remember you singing it to me when I was little. It's only fitting to play a Russian song now, in this room… with you."

_***The Russian Lullaby ***_

Sydney began to play beautifully and it instantly brought tears to Irina's eyes as she remembered so many nights she would rock Sydney to sleep humming this very tune.

Unbeknownst to the two women, Jack had come to find them and had been watching them, leaning on the doorway. He'd seen them like this, so many times before, though Sydney was much smaller and her feet barely reached the ground.

When he had shown up at that Christmas recital so many years ago, he had no idea what Sydney was planning on playing. She had told him it would be a surprise. 'Surprise indeed.' Jack thought to himself. Hearing her play the 'The Russian Lullaby,' without knowing that her mother had really been Russian KGB sent chills down Jack's spine in the back of the theatre that night.

Hearing it now, in this room while she sat next to her mother, only brought a smile to his face.

When Sydney finished Irina wrapped her arms around Sydney, tears rolling down both of their cheeks. "Sydney, that was beautiful."

"I can't believe I still remember it." Sydney wiped the tears through laughter. "Dad…" Sydney had seen him in the doorway.

He smiled at his daughter. "That was beautiful, Sydney."

Sydney watched her father's eyes shift to her mother as he approached the two.

"I'm sorry, Irina. I didn't mean to you yell at you… I know you're trying and I'm sorry."

"You already said that." She smiled back and the tension in the room immediately lifted. "Did you have some dessert?" Irina stood and stretched her back, keeping her hand on the back of her hip, one hand resting on the top.

"Yes, it was delicious. You should go have some." Jack was thankful for her understanding and accepting his apology so quickly, but still felt guilty.

"I will later but right now, I think I need to lie down and take a nap. I was up too early this morning and up too late last night." The sparkle in her eyes was unmistakable. She kissed Sydney lightly on the cheek and then Jack's, making her way out of the room without another word.

Jack took the seat on the piano bench Irina had just vacated with a heavy sigh.

"What is it?" Sydney watched as her father's brow creased in thought and frustration.

"I need to call Kendall. We have to check in."

"What are you going to tell him?" Sydney was slightly panicked. "You can't tell him where we are!"

"Sydney, I know that. But we need to tell him something and I need to find out what they've uncovered about the other KGB agents and how this is going to affect your mother's status on the CIA list. I'm not going to say anything that would put your mother or sister at risk, believe me."

"How long are we going to be able to stay do you think?" She was hopeful it would be at least a little while; she had waited so long to connect with her mother without the separation of glass.

"I don't know… probably only a couple of more days." Jack could see the disappointed on Sydney's face.

"I'm tired too. I think I'm going to take a nap as well. Can you tell Vaughn where I went please?"

At her father's nod, Sydney kissed his cheek and headed upstairs.

* * *

-Los Angeles Phone Booth-

"All three of them left two days ago after placing a call to Kendall telling him they were following a lead. It has to be Derevko." The man looked nervously at his surroundings, fidgeting with the phone cord.

"What makes you so sure?"

"There have been some interesting developments where she is concerned."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"The raid of her property in Rio proved to be quite informative, they removed her from the shoot to kill list."

"Why?"

"Jack Bristow demanded it… It would seem, that Irina Derevko is pregnant…with his child."

"Are you certain of this?"

"Yes, he showed Kendall the sonogram photo and admitted to sleeping with her while on the mission in Panama." The man looked cautiously at the homeless man stumbling towards the door.

"Jack, Jack, Jack." The mysterious man on the other end of the phone laughed. "Playing with fire will get you burned. Bedding the Devil… the man must have completely lost his mind. Well, they must have figured out her location. Are they being tracked?"

"We put a tracker in each of their phones and tracked three of them from LA to New York but from New York, the three trackers went in separate locations… one to South Africa, one to Helsinki, and the other to Tripoli. Either they are traveling separately or they ditched their phones at the airport."

"The latter of the two sounds more probable considering whom we are dealing with. Keep an ear and eye open for any further information and let me know the minute one of them makes contact with the CIA. We'll find them and they will lead us right to her."

* * *

"Yes, come in." Irina turned over in the bed to face the door hearing a soft knocking, and smiled instantly at seeing Sydney as her visitor.

_***Mother and Child Reunion***_

"Sweetheart, what is it?" Irina leaned up onto her elbows seeing Sydney's hesitancy.

Sydney glanced around her mother's room; it looked much the same as she and Vaughn's, though the bed was much larger.

"I was going to take a nap and wondered if… it was ok with you, if I…" She didn't need to finish her request as Irina was already patting the spot next to her in bed.

"Come on."

Sydney slipped off her shoes and plopped down onto the bed with a smile while Irina rolled to her side to face her daughter as they lay there.

"I always loved taking naps with you… even with the occasional foot to my face or finger in my eye." Irina laughed, "Are you still a wild sleeper?"

"No," Sydney chuckled too, "Not like that… though I am accused of being an extreme cuddler."

Irina took Sydney's hands into her own, and lay them on the pillow between them. "You always were." Irina laced her fingers through her daughters, "Cuddling, was always my favorite part."

Sydney leaned her head in closer to her mothers and Irina released one hand to brush the hair behind Sydney's ear.

"I love you, Sweetheart." She smiled resting her hand over their joined ones again.

"I love you too, Mom."

And with that Irina started humming the 'Russian Lullaby' to Sydney like she used to. Sydney smiled and closed her eyes content as can be to be lying next to her 'mommy.'

Snuggled together, face to face, holding hands, and foreheads together was just how Jack found them sleeping soundly twenty minutes later. He had made the phone call and wanted to tell them about it but was completely surprised to find them both in Irina's bed, like this. He felt his heart surge with love at seeing 'his girls' together again, knowing both were craving it so.

He marveled them in their sleep from the doorway, and how alike they both were. Sydney had changed into something very similar to what Irina had been wearing, low-cut jeans and a white form fitting tee. Both of their toes could be seen peaking out from under the long jeans covering their feet, Irina's a dark hot pink and Sydney's bright red.

Jack couldn't help but think of the Paul Simon song, 'The Mother and Child Reunion,' as he watched them sleep. He wished he had a camera to capture the moment.

Seeing Sydney stir slightly, he closed the door quietly and went in search of Vaughn, letting his 'three' girls get some rest.

He found Vaughn sitting on the steps in the front of the palace and took a seat next to the young man, seeing he was deep in thought and having an-inkling why. Jack's fatherly instincts took over. "Do you want to talk about it? Talk about your father?" Jack asked in all sincerity, knowing how hard it is to find out everything you believed was wrong.

Vaughn was surprised at first by Jack's question but seeing the compassion for the situation and understanding in Jack's eyes, he decided to talk.

_***There She Goes ***_

When the two finally came back into the house over an hour later, a new understanding between them, they heard roaring laughter and giggling coming from Irina's bedroom. The voices were speaking in Russian and as soon as they heard Katya's voice they understood why.

The three of them lay lounging about in various angle's and positions on the bed laughing hysterically at some comment Irina had apparently just made though Vaughn and Jack couldn't make it out through the laughter as they approached.

As soon as Jack and Vaughn appeared in the doorway, there was 'shushing' all around mixed with inner giggling and red faces on the women, letting the men know that the 'objects' of the apparent conversation had just walked through the door. The look of worry that was exchanged between Jack and Vaughn sent all three women into a fit of laughter.

"Talking about me, huh?" Jack decided to play it off as the arrogant cocky male, walking over to sit beside Irina on the edge of the bed. "Bragging to the girls about what a manly stud your husband is?"

To which Irina and Katya burst into a fit of laughter while Sydney tried not to laugh and shook her head violently, "Ewe Daddy, no!" Sydney couldn't believe her father would say such a thing. She'd never seen this side to him. "But we were discussing how cute you two are when you aren't driving us crazy." Sydney smiled and kissed Vaughn on the lips.

Vaughn was feeling a bit awkward standing in the middle of Irina Derevko's bedroom while she lay there, head propped up on one arm, smiling, laughing, on her bed, with the skin of her belly exposed. He had to shake his head. This was all too distracting for him. Sydney's kiss was just what was needed.

"I thought you two were supposed to be sleeping?" Jack placed his hand over Irina's belly.

"We were until we were blinded by the flash of Katya's camera as she stood over us." Irina laughed as Katya raised the camera with a smirk.

"It was such a Kodak moment, you two all cuddled up… I just had to. You'll thank me when I get these developed."

Jack was already grateful to his sister-in-law for doing what he'd wanted to do earlier.

Irina's sharp intake of breath surprised them all as her hand flew to her stomach. "Did you feel that?" She smiled to Jack who was wearing the same astonished expression at having felt the solid kick to Irina's abdomen. "Here," She grabbed Sydney's hand and placed it on the spot where the baby had kicked.

"I felt it!" Sydney suddenly shouted, a smile ear to ear at feeling the baby move for the first time. "I think I have a new sparring partner in there. Doesn't that hurt?"

"No, not really. Just surprises me." Irina moved her hand to the side, making room for Katya's hand.

Vaughn sat shyly off to the side but not for long as Irina grabbed his hand and placed it next to Sydney's. To say that he was stunned by Irina's action was an understatement and he sat there with his entire arm rigid until she smiled at him sweetly, his posture relaxing completely when he felt the baby kick again.

"Whoa!" The five of them said at once, in a mix of various languages, causing them all to laugh, when she kicked doubly hard the next time.

It was quite the sight, Jack, Sydney, Katya, Irina and Vaughn's hands covering her belly, something none of them would ever imagine just twenty-four hours ago.

'Oh what a difference a day makes,' Katya smiled happily at her sister's family.

"So what are the names you have picked out, Mom?"

"Well, like I said, nothing for sure… but I was leaning towards 'Lena.' It means 'the light." This baby had certainly been 'the light' at the end of her very dark tunnel when she thought she was going to have to raise her alone. She looked to Jack to see his reaction, hoping he would like it too.

"Lena." He repeated trying it out. "Jack, Irina, Sydney and Lena. I like it. Sounds good." He smiled and kissed her temple.

Hearing all their names put together, their 'real' names, brought tears to Irina's eyes.

"Me too." Sydney smiled. "I like it!" She said it more soundly and enthused.

"So Lena then?" Irina asked once more.

"Most definitely. And she shall be called 'Lena,'" Jack teased her and she poked him in the ribs. "No really, I like it. From now on, she is Lena."

"What about a middle name?" Sydney asked once again, none of them removing their hands from Irina's abdomen, feeling like they were somehow all connected in this moment of naming this baby.

"Middle 'names." Katya purposely over accentuated the 's.' "It is our family tradition to have more then one and a Romanov tradition that they must be taken from other members of your family."

"But I don't." Sydney looked down sadly at being left out of this obvious family tradition.

"Yes, you do." Irina tilted Sydney's face up with her fingers. The comment surprised both Jack and Sydney.

"Your middle name Anne, I gave to you for my mother. We always called her Anya, and Anya in English is Anna."

Seeing Sydney's face light up made Katya add, "And technically, your official name by birth… whether it is on your U.S birth certificate or not, is: 'Her Imperial Highness: Tsarevicha Sydney Anya Ivanova Romanova Bristowva, Grand Duchess of all Russia."

Sydney looked terrified.

"Katya," Irina admonished her sister teasingly, "Don't scare her to death. Sweetheart, I know it sounds terrifying. But its really not."

"Bristowva?" Jack slanted his eyebrows at the change in his part of this name. "And Ivanova?" He smiled already knowing what that meant.

"We're Russian, Jack and she's a girl, we add 'va' to the end of every name to make it feminine. Get over it." Katya laughed.

"I can't even remember all of what she just said… Someone explain what all of that means please?"

"Katya." Irina instructed her sister with just the mention of her name to fix this situation and try to explain what it all meant.

"Ok… so the titles in Russian royalty goes as following: 'Imperial' well that's fairly easy… you are a member of the Imperial family, 'Tsarevicha' means you are the first born in line to ascend to the throne, if we still had one, because your mother, technically is the 'Tsarina' or 'Empress' as she was the first born to our mother, who inherited that title after her brother, Alexei was killed. He was to inherit the thrown of Russia after our grandfather, Nicholas, if they had not been killed." She paused to take a breath, "Ok so… where was I, oh yes, 'Tsarevicha' is the equivalent of the European title of 'Crown,' like Victoria is the 'Crown' Princess of Sweden and Charles is the 'Crown' Prince of England, they are next to inherit the throne of their countries. And 'Grand Duchess,' is like the title of 'Princess' but is considered to be of higher ranking... and I'm not just saying that because it is my title as well." Her eyes danced with laughter seeing Sydney's eyes widen further, "And Ivanova is the patronymic of your father's name, Jonathon. It is Russian tradition to always include the father's name. Because you are a female, a daughter, it is his name in Russian, plus 'ova' which basically means, 'daughter of Jack." She smiled at Jack. "Romanova and Bristowva, are rather self explanatory. Romanov is a must in the Royal bloodline and Bristowva is your legal family name.

"Oh-kay," Sydney still looked perplexed, "So what about Lena then?"

"Well, her birth title will be, 'Her Imperial Highness: Lena…" She looked at Irina waiting for her to add the other names.

"Alix. For my... our Grandmother."

"And Irina." Jack added with a smile, stunning Irina. "For her mother."

"Ok, so, 'Her Imperial Highness: Lena Alix Irina Ivanova Romanova Bristowva, Grand Duchess of all Russia."

"Oh, my God, can you imagine when she goes to pre-school and she's supposed to learn her name! Poor child!" Jack laughed, "Sydney's twenty-seven and can hardly wrap her mind around it."

"Well, we won't tell her, Jack, she'll just be Lena Bristow to the rest of the world."

"Lena Alix Irina Bristow." He corrected her and she laughed. "And what does that make me anyway?"

"A monkey's uncle." Irina laughed hysterically at the look he gave her. "Actually, unknowingly of course, the day you married me… you became a Grand Duke."

"Not just any Grand Duke, Jack," Katya tried to look serious but was failing miserably, "Thee Grand Duke because you're married to the Empress Tsarina."

"Well, wow." He spoke dryly, also trying not to laugh, "I feel so special."

"Aren't you happy you never divorced my sister?"

"Yes, that would have been such a shame… to lose my title."

Katya burst into laughter, unable to contain it any longer, as did everyone else at Jack's attempt at humor.

"Mama!" Someone shouted from downstairs breaking into their laughter. "Mama, where are you?" The person shouted again in Italian.

Katya inhaled sharply, bouncing off the bed in delight. "My darlings!" She ran out of the room and Jack helped Irina out of bed as Vaughn helped Sydney.

Irina decided to for-go the boots again and slipped on some comfy backless, white slippers with tuffs of fur around the top to ward off the cold of the marble floors. She took hold of Sydney's hand and made way for the door.

Vaughn held the door for them and motioned Jack through as well, "No after you… Grand Duke." He chuckled, bowing, and Jack slapped him upside the head.

"Mama! Where are you?" Sophia dropped her bags and shouted in Italian once again.

"You're in Russia now, Darling, speak in Russian." Katya teasingly scolded her as she bound down the stairs flinging her arms around her daughter and pulling her son into the embrace.

Over her mother's shoulder Sophia caught sight of the foursome making their way down the steps toward them, Irina leading the way. "Is this…?" She looked from Irina to her mother, making the easy transition into Russian.

"Yes, Darling… it is Irina." Katya stepped back and took hold of her sister's hand smiling.

"Hello, Sophia, Sergei." Irina smiled at the two. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you."

"No, it is ours. We've heard so much about our 'crazy and courageous Aunt Rina.' If I had not seen the photos I would have believed you were a myth. Mama talks about you so much; and tells us such crazy stories." Sophia stepped forward and embraced her aunt eyeing the other three suspiciously.

Sergei stepped forward and kissed his aunt's cheeks and embraced her as well.

"Sergei, Sophia I would like to introduce you to my husband Jack, and my daughter, Sydney." Irina beamed proudly pulling Sydney's hand into hers once more.

"The Americans?" Sergei finally spoke, shocked to see the people of his mother's tales standing before him.

"Yes," Jack stepped forward and extended his hand for Sergei to shake.

Sophia squealed with delight hurling herself at Sydney. "Oh, cousin finally we meet. I've always wanted a cousin."

Sydney was slightly stunned at first but smiled brightly at the welcome. "Me too."

"What about Julian?" Katya stepped beside her son taking his hand. "He is your cousin."

"I haven't seen him since we were small children and he used to pull my hair." Sophia snorted in disgust before noticing the beautiful man standing in the background. Her eyes never leaving his she continued, "Besides, he is a distant cousin, Sydney is my first cousin."

"Sark, that doesn't surprise me." Sydney smiled and shook her head.

"You know Julian?" Sophia asked offhandedly, her eyes still roaming over Vaughn.

Taking notice of her cousin eyeing 'her man.' She stepped back from Sophia and possessively wrapped her arm around Vaughn's waist, pulling him closer. "Yes, I've had the unfortunate experience of running into him on numerous occasions. Sophia, Sergei… I would like to introduce you to Michael Vaughn."

"Hmm," Sophia smiled seductively, another Derevko trait passed on. "It's a pleasure, Michael. Tell me, are you and Sydney-"

"Together. Yes, Sophia." Her mother cut in, using a warning tone that said 'leave him alone.'

Sophia took the hint and backed off, deciding it best to change the topic. Taking a step back and looking around, "Mama this place looks amazing. Sergei and I couldn't believe it when we pulled up. It looks so different, so beautiful."

"That is Rina's doing. She's been restoring it, and all the others for the past few years." Katya smiled appreciatively at her sister.

"You've been here before?" Sydney asked, a hint of jealousy in her tone, surprised be her own feelings of jealousy.

"Yes, mama used to bring us here when Sergei and I were little. We would play… oh, what do you American's call it?" she furrowed her brow in thought, "Ah yes, Hide-n-Seek. But we've not been here for many, many years."

Irina smiled at Katya; having never known her sister brought her children to the palace to continue the tradition of 'hide-n-seek' their mother had started. She was also saddened by the thought, seeing Sydney's fallen expression at not being part of that tradition.

"I can see we have a lot to catch up on, why don't you leave your bags here for Dmitri and we can continue this conversation over dinner."

Everyone nodded in agreement and made their way towards the dining hall.

* * *

"Vaughn," Sydney said passing him the bottle of vodka that was traditionally served with the evening meal.

"Vaughn… such an interesting last name. What is that? German?" Sophia probed as they began to serve dinner, ignoring her mother's warning, still fascinated by the 'familiarity' she found in Vaughn.

Vaughn seemed truly disturbed by the question, having believed up until recently that it was German and Irina, Sydney and Jack all slowed in their passing of the food, cautious of Vaughn's reaction.

To his credit Vaughn kept his calm demeanor and answered pouring himself a sizeable glass of vodka. "Actually, I've just learned it's a shortened form of a Russian name."

"You are of Russian decent?" Sophia seemed even more intrigued.

"His father was Mikhail… Mikhail Vontonavich." Katya smiled bashfully at Vaughn, apologizing with her eyes for her daughter's curiosity.

"Mikhail Vontonavich?" Sophia practically choked on her own vodka then smiled slyly at Sydney setting her glass down. "Well, well, cousin. Seems we have yet another thing in common. We both have a thing for Vontonavich men."

* * *

"Have you learned anything new about Derevko's whereabouts?" Arvin Sloane asked sitting back in his big leather chair.

"No, nothing new yet." Came the mysterious voice on the other end of the line.

"What about Agents Bristow and Vaughn?"

"No news but I heard Director Kendall telling Agent Dixon that Jack Bristow is supposed to be calling today to check in."

"Well Jack is no doubt with Irina where ever she is." Arvin smiled shaking his head.

"She betrayed him and he shot her."

"Yes, but you are too young to understand their relationship." Arvin sniffed at the infidel on the other end of the phone. "They have a love/hate relationship it seems and Jack has recently learned she's carrying his child."

"And he's just recently learned the details of her imprisonment in Kashmir and that she didn't really kill at least three of the CIA agents, who were actually KGB, that she's accused of murdering." The young man on the other end of the phone started to see the light.

"Yes. I suppose that evidence is 'softening' Irina in their eyes somewhat. Either this is some plan of his to capture Irina and take their child from her or… he's planning something with her. One way or another, Jack is masterminding something… of that I am certain. Make sure to contact me as soon as he checks in. We need to get Irina as soon as possible to begin the procedure."

"But she's pregnant." The unidentified man stated.

"Yes, and unfortunate problem that we'll deal with." Sloane sighed and rubbed his temples, "Remember, any word contact me immediately."

* * *

_***From Russia With Love ***_

At seeing Sydney and Vaughn's curiosity peeked at the mention of another 'Vontonavich', and seeing his sister intended to leave them hanging, Sergei provided the missing information Sophia had left out.

"Sophia dated Viktor Vontonavich for many years… your cousin, Mr. Vaughn."

"Cousin?" Vaughn immediately shot Irina a look somewhere between accusatory and inquisitive, looking for answers. He, like Sydney, believed his parents had been only children, leaving him with no extended family.

"Your father had a younger brother, Alexander who has three children, your cousins. Two girls, Yelena and Natalia, and a son, Viktor." Irina replied smoothly.

"Where are they now?" His interest peaked at hearing about his family.

"Your grandmother lives with your uncle and aunt about two hours outside the city and last I heard, the children were all living in Moscow."

"Viktor recently moved here, to St. Petersburg." Sophia added, "We still keep in contact, through email and such."

"My grandmother is still living?" Vaughn was completely surprised, the thought that she could possibly still be living never crossing his mind.

"Yes," Irina smiled sweetly at him, passing a basket of rolls to Sergei on her left. "She just turned seventy-five last week."

Dmitri suddenly appeared beside Irina holding a handheld phone. Irina began speaking in Russian and then stood, holding her hand over the end of the phone and said, "Excuse me, I have to take this call." As she made her way out of the room she had switched to yet another language.

"Was that Japanese?" Sophia asked to no one in particular.

"Yes." Sydney sighed, pursing her lips in silent frustration at trying to figure out who her mother was on the phone with and why the call was so important that she had to leave. She glanced over at her father, seeing he was sharing in the frustration. Both of them finding it difficult to 'trust' Irina and not leap out of their chairs after her. Especially after so many months of working against her, trying to follow her 'business' moves.

"Tell me, Sydney, what is it that you do. I know that your father is an agent for the CIA," Sophia smiled at Jack with all the enthusiasm and wonder of a small child, "That part we know from the bedtime stories our mother and grandmother told us, but what do you do exactly?"

"I work for the Department of State." Sydney replied calmly, filling her glass with vodka as well.

"Ah, so you're a spy too." Sophia smiled at Sydney's surprised look. "It's not surprising since both of your parents are."

"Your bedtimes stories were about Irina and I?" Jack asked incredulously, looking from Sophia to Katya. "What were you trying to do, give them nightmares?"

"No, Jack." She smiled coyly, "My children, especially Sophia, have always been inquisitive. They'd both seen pictures and heard about their infamous aunt living in the United States. Every night it was the same questions about Irina and her life so… we turned Irina's letters home into bedtime stories."

Jack shook his head at the thought that his tumultuous life with Irina was used as a child's bedtime story.

"It's not as bad as it sounds, Uncle," Sophia smiled at Jack's surprise at her calling him 'uncle.' "I found the whole thing terribly romantic."

"And I loved hearing about the mystery and action." Sergei added.

"My favorite part was imagining my 'big cousin Sydney." Sophia stuffed a piece of bread into her mouth. "Keep in mind I was only three when we started hearing these stories. Hearing about our 'mythical' older cousin who was American, was fascinating."

Sydney smiled at the thought of her cousins lying in their beds hearing tales of her life in America. She vaguely remembered the bedtime stories her mother would tell her about 'little secret princesses' living in a beautiful land on the other side of the world and their adventures. The fairy tales Irina told had been based in truth, her truth.

Irina returned moments later; phone in hand, taking her seat again. "I'm sorry about that. So what did I miss?" She took a bite of food as though nothing had happened.

"The mysterious bedtime stories of Irina and her American family." Jack informed her, still curious about the mysterious caller.

"What?" Irina looked around the table at everyone, having no idea what was going on.

"It's a long story. Who was on the phone?" Jack interjected, earning him swift look from Irina.

"A business associate." She replied coolly, her eyes leveling on Jack, seeing the mistrust in his eyes.

"In Japan?" He asked in a borderline accusatory tone.

The rest of the group watched in wonder at the silent showdown.

"Yes."

"About what?"

"Do I ask you about everything you do on a daily basis?"

"No you just spy on me." Jack replied dryly taking a swig of the vodka, feeling it burn in his chest and getting angry at Irina's reluctance to tell him whom she was speaking with.

"Nothing that concerns you," Irina flicked her hair behind her shoulder, annoyed by his line of questioning, "Or your government." She added sarcastically, placing her fork next to her plate and leaning back in her chair at the head of the long table.

"Let me be the judge of that."

"Fine if you must know, it was Yoshiro Mori."

"The Prime Minister of Japan?" Sydney interrupted her parents 'verbal battle' surprised.

"Yes." Irina replied sharply her eyes never leaving Jack's.

"Why?" Sydney braved.

"Because I have something he wants, and he has something I want."

"Well that's cryptic." Jack sniffed in annoyance. "Elaborate." He commanded. Seeing the flare in Irina's eyes, decided it was a bad idea to 'command' her to do anything and took a softer approach. "Please?"

"Japan and Russia have been in talks about building a pipeline from Moscow to Tokyo providing Japan with electricity and oil, which I, we…have agreed to with one condition. Mr. Mori doesn't want to comply with the condition."

"Which is…" Sydney kept prompting her mother, as all in the room, save Katya who knew what was going on, were interested in this story.

"In 1920 during the Revolution, Admiral Alexander Kolavak began smuggling the Romanov fortune out of Russia, in attempt to protect it. He was intercepted in Siberia and the money was taken to Japan. That money is still sitting in the Bank of Tokyo and I want it back, Japan doesn't want to let it go even though it is not theirs."

"How much?" Jack asked much softer but still curious.

"In Japan?" Irina sighed and fingered her hair behind her ear, "A little over $80 billion." Looking around at the stunned, gaping mouths at the table she continued, "A little over $400 billion was hidden in banks throughout Europe, Japan and the United States. Over the last 20 years we've been 'retrieving' it. Japan is the one of the last holdouts, not wanting to give it up. But…if they want the pipeline, they must return what is Russia's. That money alone would alleviate two-thirds of Russia's dept to the world. Paying that off, combined with the profits from the pipeline would put Russia on her feet again."

"$80 billion dollars… I wouldn't want to give that up either." Jack swallowed hard, once again feeling foolish for his mistrust of Irina's actions, and completely fascinated by her actions once more.

"$80 billion? How about $400 billion!" Sydney gasped.

"Well I can see now how you can afford all those students." Jack smiled sheepishly, Irina's dark eyes still piercing his for grilling her.

"What students?" Sydney's interest was diverted from the money to her mother.

"Your mother has been paying tuition and living expenses for over three thousand needy Russian students for years…anonymously." Jack smiled at Sydney's stunned expression, turning his smile back to Irina who blushed and looked away, not wanting the attention.

"You've what?" Sydney was once again flabbergasted by her mother's actions. "Mom, that's incredible." She smiled, feeling herself tear up.

"It's not that incredible." Irina brushed off the compliment. "Our family cannot possibly spend that much money, nor do we need it… so it serves our best interests to share it with those who 'do' need it." She sloughed her shoulders, and began cleaning up her place setting.

"Well, I think we should go out and spend some of that money." Sophia clapped her hands together, excitedly. "Let's go to the club, have some drinks, dance… get wild. It's been so long since I've partied in St. Petersburg."

"The club?" Sydney looked from Sophia to her mother.

"Yes, 'Anastasia.' Named after our dear 'legendary Grandmother.' Of course no one in the public really knows for certain that she survived the massacre but Russian's thrive on rumors. It's the hottest spot in St. Petersburg and there is always a line, but I'm sure we can get in. It just so happens I know the owner." She smiled at Irina.

"Mom?" Sydney looked incredulously at Irina. "You own a club?"

"Several in fact, all around the world." Irina laughed at the look on Sydney's face. "You've actually frequented some of them, unknowingly of course, on your missions." She added, once again surprising her daughter. "Remember Paris? That was one of mine."

"I'm in." Sergei smiled, "I haven't danced in long time with all of my studies, I have no social life anymore."

"Me too, this sounds so fun." Katya clapped laughing with glee.

"Are you kidding me?" Jack deadpanned seriously, looking at Katya like she had two heads. "Dancing? In a club?"

"Oh, come on, Jack! Rina told me you have amazing 'moves.'" She winked at him and Irina shot her a dirty look.

"As much fun as this sounds like, I am afraid I have to decline." Irina stood, stretching her back slightly before rubbing circles over her enlarged belly. "But I really should try to get some sleep tonight but you kids should go, have a good time."

"Sleep? What about that 'auto-circadian meditation' you were always doing? You know, _'all the benefits of sleep in a fraction of the time_." Sydney teased her mother, feeling bolder with the effects of the vodka.

"Well, that doesn't exactly work while your pregnant. What's beneficial to my body isn't necessarily good for your sister. So," Irina shifted her hips and smiled at Sydney. "I won't be able to go but seriously, you should all go. Katya, Jack, you too."

"I don't think so." Jack gave her unreadable look. "I need to call Kendall."

"You're calling Kendall?" Irina sat suddenly in her chair again; feeling like the wind had been knocked out of her.

Katya moved around the table, placing her hand protectively on her shoulder, glaring at Jack.

"It's not what you think." Jack reached across the table and took hold of Irina's hand. "I have to call and check in or he'll become suspicious and send out an 'alert' to the other agents in the field to look for us. I'm not going to tell him where or whom I'm with so don't worry. I won't do anything to put you in danger."

Seeing the drastic change of emotions run across her mother and aunts faces at the mention of the name, Sophia's curiosity got the best of her again.

"Who's Kendall, why do you need to check in with him, and why can't you tell him where and whom you're with…and why would doing so be dangerous to Aunt Rina?" Sophia looked from one face to the next searching for any clues.

"Are you sure you aren't an interrogator?" Jack couldn't believe the questions this girl had, nor her lack of intimidation at asking them. 'She is a Derevko after all.' He laughed to himself. "Kendall is our boss at the CIA and technically we are still on the job so we must check in. And telling him we are with Irina is a very bad idea that could be very dangerous for her...For all of us." He glanced at Sydney remember their conversation about associating with a known terrorist.

"Why?" Sophia persisted.

"Because I am Number Six on the CIA/FBI's '_Most Wanted List_' and they," Irina looked pointedly at Jack, Sydney, and Vaughn, "have a 'Shoot To Kill' order on me." Irina pulled her hand away from Jack's and once again moved to stand, walking over to look out the window.

"Oh My God." Sophia looked at the three horrified and then to her aunt in astonishment. Her mother had left these little details out of their talks about Irina and being in the modeling business, she would never think to look at the CIA's Most Wanted List for her aunt of all people. It made sense, after all she was a spy there but…

"You've been taken off the Shoot To Kill list." Jack swallowed hard and Irina's head snapped to his attention. "Because you're pregnant…and because we know you obviously didn't kill at least three of the agents you pled guilty to murdering."

The 'other' agents and their supposed deaths were something they had yet to discuss but Jack shared a silent understanding with Irina that this was not the time.

"Murder? What the hell is he talking about? I thought you stole information about some experiment?" Sophia was more horrified and confused then ever.

"It's a long story, Sophia," Irina sighed, "but yes I was sent there to steal documents, and I never killed those agents… but it was made to look as though I did… to extract fellow KGB agents."

And with that, Jack, Sydney and Vaughn's suspicions about the other agents were confirmed. They had known positively about three of them including Vaughn's father and assumed the CIA's further research would indeed prove the other nine were as well.

"I'm not trying to be obstinate, but the less you know the better, Sophia. Please believe that. Knowing me is dangerous… which is why I've stayed away from you and your brother… and your mother, all these years. I love you too much to see you brought into my mess." Irina's eyes began to glisten with unshed tears.

"Ok," Sophia replied softly, not fully understanding but letting it go for now, seeing her how upsetting it was for her aunt.

Feeling the need to end the uncomfortable silence, Sergei smiled at Sydney. "So cousin, are you ready 'to party' as you American's say?"

"Yeah." Sydney smiled shyly tucking her hair behind her ear, looking nervously between her mother and father.

"First, we must finish the vodka, it is a bad omen to leave the table without finishing the vodka." Katya poured another round of drinks for everyone, except for Irina, feeling that they could all use another drink in addition to keeping with Russian tradition.

"I'll have Dmitri pull the car around." Irina moved from the window, setting the phone down next to Jack without looking at him, stopping only to say, "The line is secure," before continuing out the door.

Jack watched her leave and picked up the phone, excusing himself from the room after wishing them a fun night.

Seeing Sydney's obvious distraught over her mother's mood, Katya put an arm around her shoulders. "She'll be ok. Come on. Let's go have some fun, Russian style. Besides… if you're father does anything to jeopardize my sister… I'm not above killing him." She winked and herded the group out the door to change clothes.

* * *

The limo pulled up to the back of the club where muffled dance music could already be heard coming from the club.

Katya switched back to Russian as speaking in English would only arouse unwanted attention. "All right children, I'll get you in and then I am leaving. Dmitri will come back and wait for you, out here with the car to drive you home when you're ready."

"What? You're not staying, Mama?" Sergei stopped with his hand on the door handle. "But you said…"

"I wanted to make sure you arrived safely and got entrance," she paused and smiled, "And I wanted to give your mother and father some alone time. They have a lot of things to work out." She placed her hand on Sydney's knee with a soft smile. "Besides, I am not really into this kind of music, Irina may not mind it…but I prefer something a little less brain intensive." She laughed. "Go!" She shooed them out of the car and waved two fingers at the bouncer who acknowledge her and opened the door to the club.

The crisp night air immediately filled with the sounds of the wild dance beats and hundreds of people.

Sophia grabbed Sydney's hand and led the way through the crowd.

The club was four stories high with a hollow center, allowing each story to look down, over the circular balconies to the subsequent floors. Light beams danced through the air almost as fast as the crowd moving to the music. The very top floor was surrounded by mirrors instead of railings and on each floor there were two bars, located on opposite sides to better serve the people, with space to dance on either side. The main dance floor was in the center of the first floor.

"See that," Sophia pointed to the mirrored fourth story, "That is your mother's office."

"Two-way mirrors." Sydney stood in astonishment of the club that was her mother's.

"Yeah, so she that can see everything that goes on." Sophia laughed and waved to a D.J on the second floor. He eagerly waved back and gave her the thumbs up sign, moving to switch the record.

_***Anastasia***_

The crowd booed at the loss of their music until the first few bars of the new song played and then they went wild. _'Anastasia'_ a woman's voice proclaimed in the song and the crowd went ballistic.

"It's become the theme song here as you can tell, in honor of Grand Ma-Ma of course." Sophia smiled and started head banging and dancing around wildly causing Sydney, and Vaughn to laugh and Sergei to laugh and shake his head at this sister, heading off in search of more drinks for them.

Sydney and Vaughn just shrugged and started dancing wildly, finding it so easy, and comforting to laugh after so much seriousness in the last months. Finding it so easy to lose themselves, they had no idea that they were being watched.


	16. Chapter 16

_**AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat): I Don't Want to Know (Instr.) **_**by Mario**_**, Feelin' Love **_**by Paula Cole**_**, Try **_**by Nelly Fertado**_**, Delirium Silence (remix) **_**by Sarah McLachlan**_**, In My Place**_** by Coldplay**_**, The Russian Dervish-Marta's Dance by Celtic Dance, Lara's Theme **_**from Dr. Zhivago Soundtrack**_**, Leave No Man Behind **_**by Hans Zimmer from Black Hawk Down Soundtrack**

* * *

SIXTEEN

o

"Jack, where the hell are you?" Kendall's voice boomed over the phone as Jack took a seat on the front steps of the palace. "According to your cell phones, the three of you are all on separate continents following 'this lead,' but somehow I doubt that as the signals haven't left the airports."

"I can't discuss that at this time without jeopardizing my contact or myself."

"Your contact?" Kendall sniffed the air, having a good idea who that 'contact' was. "You mean Derevko?"

Jack remained silent on the other end of the phone.

"Your silence speaks volumes, Jack."

"I will neither confirm nor deny the name of my contact, this is nothing new, Kendall. It's standard proto-cal for Agents in the field to protect their contacts. I'm calling to ask what you've found out about the other nine agents Irina… Derevko has supposedly murdered."

Kendall had heard the slip up Jack made by calling her Irina but ignored it. "We've found red flags in all of their missions, some of which were acknowledged at the time as suspect but were overlooked after the agents were supposedly killed. One more of the remaining nine has been positively identified as KGB." Kendall sighed rubbing his temples at the mess this all was creating.

"Who?" Jack asked, rubbing his temples thinking much the same.

"Paul McCallister otherwise known as Peter Malkovich."

"Paul?" Jack sighed and shook his head.

"You knew him?"

"Apparently as well as I knew my wife." Jack stood and began pacing thinking about how he could have been so blind then. 'No that wasn't true' he thought. "Actually, I didn't really know him that well even under the pretense that he was 'Paul the CIA analyst.' The guy was Arvin's roommate at the Farm and we worked together with him on a few missions." Jack was quiet a moment thinking about some comments that he had made to 'Paul' on one of those missions about Laura/Irina when they were discussing their wives. He couldn't help but wonder now if 'Paul' had really known who 'Laura' was at that time and was secretly laughing at the stupid American fool gushing over his amazing 'wife.' "What about Sloane and Cuvee?" Jack suddenly remembered who he was on the phone with.

"We've learned Sloane just recently purchased fertility research and surgical equipment from a German medical supplier under the alias 'Omnifam Corporation' but from there we've lost the trail."

"I can only speculate what the hell he's going to do with that and what it has to do with Irina and the Rambaldi Prophecy." Jack's concern was growing even more now with the news.

"Actually, we think we have some idea from the decoded Rambaldi pages Sydney recovered from Cuvee." Kendall added hesitantly. "The documents were incomplete in their decoding but from what has been decoded, it would seem that Sloane is going to attempt to use Derevko as a human incubator of sorts for the second coming of Rambaldi. Something about creating 'The Chosen Child' of 'The One' from the descendents of Rambaldi and apparently, it is 'that' child that will bring utter desolation to the world."

"What?" Jack practically shouted into the phone, feeling his blood pressure rising. "Oh my God… he's mad. Absolutely crazy." Shaking his head, "I'm coming back. I'll be in touch."

_***I Don't Wanna Know (Instr) ***_

He pushed 'end' on the phone and clenched his fists, irate at the situation. He had to go back and find Sloane before he found Irina. He was nowhere near working out a plan with Irina and now he had to leave. His frustrations over the situation getting the best of him, he threw the phone into the bushes.

Seconds after, realizing that it was a stupid thing to do, throwing an, 'already upset' Irina's secure phone into the bushes, he climbed the small railing and began searching.

That is how Katya found him moments later. "Jack…what are you doing?"

"Getting the phone." He spat angrily, holding up the phone triumphantly, stalking out of the bushes. "What are you doing here? Too old to party with the kids?"

"No, not too old, too tired. Why was it in the bushes Jack?" She asked sarcastically, helping him to brush stray leaves from his back and shoulders. "A telemarketer perhaps?" She laughed.

"No. Kendall." He sighed, "I am leaving in the morning."

"What? Why? You just arrived… and Sydney-" She thought about the look on her niece's face earlier in the evening and knew she needed more time with her mother.

"Is staying." Jack turned his eyes to Katya. "At least for a couple of more days… I know she and Irina need this time."

"So do you." Katya insisted.

"Yes," Jack admitted, "But her safety must come before anything else… I have to leave now."

"She will be very disappointed." Katya dropped her hand from his shoulder and together they made their way up the steps.

"I'll make it up to her."

"I'm sure you will." Katya smiled coyly at him and kissed his cheek goodnight. "Da svidanya, Jack."

"Jack," She stopped and turned suddenly, "Just… I love my sister and her happiness is my happiness, her heartbreak is my heartbreak, we share pieces of each others hearts… please don't break our hearts and let this second chance slip by." She smiled, feeling the tears forming in her eyes. "Remember… patience."

Jack nodded in silent agreement, afraid to speak and watched her disappear into the library before heading up the staircase in search of Irina. "Irina," Jack tapped on the bathroom, "Can I come in?" His mind instantly flashing back to Panama and the same question he'd asked her that morning.

When he received no response he steeled himself for entry.

**_*Feelin Love *_**

The lights were dimmed and soft candles lit the room. An enormous claw foot tub sat at the far end of the room, in what appeared to be an atrium made of glass on all sides, giving the occupant of the tub a spectacular view of the property and night sky.

Irina's dark hair could be seen hanging over the back of the tub, the rest of her surrounded by mountains of bubbles, save one knee bent sticking out.

As Jack approached, he could see that she had fallen asleep. He squatted quietly beside the tub, taking in the beauty before him.

"It's not polite to stare." Irina's voice breaking his reverie, her eyes still closed. "So should I be packing, expecting a Delta Team storming in at any moment or can I keep sleeping in my nice warm bath?"

"No Delta Teams. You can keep your beautiful self, right where you are."

"Good. I'm too comfortable to move." Her eyes remaining closed throughout the entire conversation, avoiding eye contact with Jack, and distracted by his hands.

"Are you still angry with me?" Jack asked softly dragging his fingers lazily up and down the part of her thigh that was exposed.

"Not angry. Annoyed." Her eyes remained closed.

"Well that's better then angry." Jack kept up his mesmerizing finger assault on her already burning flesh. "I'm sorry for being so intrusive into your life… old habits are going to be hard to break."

"I'm sorry, too," she finally opened her eyes. "I should have just told you who I was on the phone with but… it's also an old habit of mine to deflect your questioning." She pulled a wet hand from the bubbles, running her own assault on the flesh of Jack's forearm. "If you don't mind my asking," she paused meeting his eyes, "what did you tell Kendall?"

"I didn't reveal where I was or whom I was with though he guessed."

Irina's eyes immediately filled with concern knowing what associating with her could cost them.

"I neither confirmed nor denied to protect my source as standard protocol and he dropped it. He had other things to tell me."

"Like what?" She caressed the tip of his fingers with hers making it difficult for Jack to concentrate.

"Do you really want to talk about that right now?" Jack slid his hand under the bubbles into dangerous territory.

"Not really." She surprised him by forcefully grabbing his arm and pulling him to her mouth, halfway into the tub, kissing him hard, and soaking his clothes, splashing water onto the floor.

"I'm all wet." Jack backed up in mock surprise when the kiss ended.

"That makes two of us." Irina cocked her eyebrow giving him a seductive smile. "The only difference, Agent Bristow; is that you're still in your clothes… and I'm growing impatient waiting for you to join me."

Jack needed no more encouragement and began slowly and seductively removing his clothing, enjoying the reaction his strip tease was getting out of Irina.

Licking and biting her lip in anticipation, as Jack slowly climbed into the tub where they proceeded to make slow, sensual love. Jack savoring every look, every touch, knowing it might be a while before he was with her again.

* * *

"Jack Bristow is returning from wherever he is. Kendall fed him the decoded document information as well as telling him about the information you leaked about the purchasing of the medical supplies."

"Good. Then our plan is working out perfectly. If he has been with Irina, that I am positive he has, then his obsession with catching me will leave Irina unguarded and vulnerable, making it easier for us to capture her." Sloane smiled slyly to himself running his finger over a picture of Irina lying on his desk. "I've also put the word out to tail Katya Derevko. Someone has been helping to keep Irina hidden and still keep her organization running. I have to believe that even though they haven't spoken in years, the only one that Irina would trust with such responsibility would have to be her sister. So keep your ears open."

* * *

_***Try ***_

With Jack settled behind her, Irina bent forward to shut the water off after refilling the tub with warm water. She lay back against Jack's chest, her slippery skin causing his already aching body to react with yet another round of desire.

Gently, he ran his hands down her arms and laced his fingers with her own. Irina brought them both to rest on her belly, enjoying the feel of both their hands caressing the kicking child inside. Their legs entangled, Jack leaned his cheek down to rest against the side of Irina's face, thinking about another time, another place he chuckled at their situation, the deep vibrations shaking both he and Irina.

"I know what your thinking." She smiled.

"You do?" He asked surprised that she would remember and having a flashback to the train 'toaster' conversation.

"Yes. That trip to Santa Barbara when I was pregnant with Sydney." Irina began to giggle at the memory.

"That's right." Jack laughed and pulled her closer.

"We gave that old couple quite the show." They both laughed together. "I'll never forget the look on their faces."

"Who didn't we give a show back then, Irina? We were always getting into trouble."

"And you wonder where our daughter gets it, Jack." She turned her head to look at him raising the incredulous eyebrow.

"We were young and crazy then." He tried to reason with her, knowing he was making a mute point.

"Yes," Irina sighed turning her attention back to her belly. "Out of our minds."

Her sudden mood change did not go unnoticed by Jack. "Was that one of those times?" Jack caressed her tub-wrinkled fingers with his. "That the 'illusion of our marriage was just as powerful for you as it was for me?" Jack recited the first thing she had said to him in twenty years from that morning in her cell.

"Yes," She answered honestly, pulling Jack's arms closer to her body, one just below her breasts and the other below her belly, suddenly feeling vulnerable. "But I also knew I was playing with fire… falling so deeply in love with you, and our unborn child… leaving myself vulnerable to being caught by either the CIA… or worse the KGB.. .because I wasn't thinking as an Agent… I was thinking as a wife and mother."

Jack's hands turned Irina's over and for the first time, he noticed the scars on her wrists from the cuffs that dug into bones while she was being gang raped. He swallowed hard and tried not to concentrate on them and alert her to the fact that was what he was looking at and thinking about. "Do you ever regret taking the assignment to marry me?" His throat tightened with her admission and his thinking about the prison and torture she had to endure.

She once again turned in his arms to face him, letting her fingers caress his cheek and jaw. "Sometimes, I used to think 'yes' I did regret it…because of the pain and sorrow I brought into your and Sydney's lives… but selfishly… for me 'no'…because even though that assignment brought me the greatest sorrows in my life," A single tear began to roll down her cheek and she look down to Jack's chest, where her hand was now nervously twirling the hair there. "It… it also brought me, the greatest joys I have ever known." She finally looked up into his eyes. "Sydney… you… and now Lena."

"I feel the same way… the things in life that bring us the greatest sorrows are also that which bring us the greatest joys and vice versa." Jack nodded in agreement and once again snuggled into Irina.

"That's in a book…" She thought for a moment, "Oh yes, I remember, 'When you are joyous, look deep into your heart, and you shall find that it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy. When you are sorrowful, look again into your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.' By Kahlil Gibran."

"That's right. From 'The Prophet.'" Jack grabbed the sponge and dipped it into the water, before trailing it down Irina's arm. "Your literary familiarity never ceases to amaze me."

There was a long silence, Irina knowing that Jack had something on his mind and combined with the extra attention to detail he was paying her, she had a fairly good idea what that was.

"You're leaving tomorrow… aren't you, Jack?" She'd been leaning forward as Jack washed her back. His sudden stopping of the motion was the only confirmation she needed.

"Yes." He swallowed hard at her ability to read his mind and the sadness he heard in her tone.

"And Sydney?" She turned to face him.

"She can stay a couple of more days."

Irina smiled slightly, and nodded. She was quiet a moment before speaking again. "I'd like Michael to stay as well. There are some things… I would like both of them to see."

Jack was surprised by her request but nodded in agreement as he continued to wash her back. "Michael?" He asked bewildered at her choice of words seconds later.

* * *

_***Delirium Silence (Remix) ***_

"Sophia!" Someone shouted waving frankly as they made their way through the crowd toward where they were getting drinks at the bar.

"Viktor!" Sophia shouted back, launching herself into the arms of the good-looking man.

"I didn't know you were in town." He smiled kissing her cheeks before noticing the two strangers now staring at him behind her. "Who are your friends?" He shouted. Vaughn and Viktor noticeably sizing each other up.

Though they looked different, Viktor's build more bulky muscular compared to Vaughn's slender muscular body, their dirty blonde hair and blue eyes were almost exact. Vaughn new instantly that this was his long lost cousin.

"Funny you should ask?" Sophia smiled and was about to spill the beans when Vaughn extended his hand and introduced himself.

"Mike."

Sydney, Sergei and Sophia taking notice that Vaughn wanted to keep his true identity to himself for now.

"Mike." Viktor repeated looking strangely at Vaughn. "Viktor. You are American? Yes?"

"Yes, and this is my girlfriend, Sydney."

Viktor diverted his attention briefly from Vaughn to the beautiful woman standing beside him.

"My pleasure." He smiled kissing Sydney's cheeks before stepping back to stare oddly at Vaughn again. "It's very strange…but you look. Never mind." Viktor smiled brushing off any further thoughts.

"I look what?" Vaughn probed, having an, inkling as to what the young man was going to say.

"What?" Viktor yelled over the music.

"I look what?" Vaughn repeated.

"I was going to say, that you resemble someone I used to know."

"Really." Vaughn looked to Sydney and back to Viktor, "Whom if I might ask?"

"My late uncle. He was killed… many years ago by a landmine." Viktor paid the bartender and passed out the drinks to everyone.

"I'm sorry." Vaughn swallowed hard.

"Yes… well I was only six years old at the time. I'd only met him a few times. He worked for the Soviet government overseas most of the time doing some Top Secret stuff… I don't really know." He continued waving at various people around the club, not fully into the conversation.

"I see." Vaughn nodded and Sydney squeezed his hand.

"Isn't this place amazing?" Viktor smiled leading them all back onto the dance floor. "It's run by 'The Romanov' you know? Or hasn't Sophia filled you in on all that?"

"In on what?" It was Sydney's turn to be curious.

"Well rumor has been for years that a descendent of the royal family has been the one bringing Russia back to life since the fall of the Soviet Union. She builds all sorts of things for the public like these clubs for the youth, opens clinics and hospitals, schools… does it all anonymously. No one knows for sure or not if she really exists as no one has ever seen her but her legend is notorious anyway. You can't go anywhere in St. Petersburg without hearing tall tales of 'The Romanov' and the conspiracy theory that they are the real power behind the government."

"Notorious… yeah." Sydney shook her head. 'You have no idea how notorious.' She thought to herself.

"Anyway, everyone loves 'The Romanov.' Especially me." He pushed his way to the center of the dance floor, grabbing hold of Sophia. "My father knows who she is but won't tell us. I used to think he was full of shit, but then my college tuition, and my sisters' were suddenly paid in full as well as my grandmother's medical bills for her diabetes. 'The Romanov' takes care of our family."

Sophia threw a wink over Viktor's shoulder at Vaughn and Sydney before losing herself to the current song. Viktor obviously having no idea that she was of Romanov descent.

Sydney glanced around the club spotting her cousin Sergei draped in women and he gave her a little wave. She looked at Vaughn and downed her drink as he did his… the whole scenario just too bizarre for both of them.

* * *

"Have you seen Irina?" Jack bound into the kitchen dropping his bag to the floor, packed and ready to leave.

"She just finished with her physical therapy… and I believe, that she's in the garden now." Katya took another sip of coffee and continued reading the paper. She'd seen Irina earlier in the morning and her sister's silence spoke volumes at the distress she was in over Jack's leaving.

"Dad," Sydney and Vaughn came in behind Jack, stopping when they saw his packed bag as his feet. "Are we leaving?" She asked shoulders slumped with disappointment.

"Not you, me. You and Vaughn are staying another couple days." Seeing the confusion he continued. "There's been a development with Sloane and I need to get back as soon as possible."

"Does Mom know?"

"Yes. I told her last night."

"Well shouldn't we go with you?" Sydney asked confused, taking a seat next to Katya at the breakfast bar.

"Or at least me?" Vaughn added.

"No. Irina wants 'both' of you to stay. And quite frankly, I feel much better about leaving her knowing that you two will be with her at least a few days longer." Jack poured himself a cup of coffee one for both Vaughn and Sydney.

_***In My Place ***_

"Where is she?" Sydney asked looking between her father and Katya.

"I was just asking that." Jack took another swig of his coffee.

"She's in the garden." Katya nodded her head in the direction of the French doors leading to the garden.

Irina could be seen in the distance, wearing a black, form fitting, sleeveless top that left part of her belly exposed and black yoga pants, hair pulled back in a loose ponytail, standing in some various yoga position.

"I've got to get going." Jack finished his coffee and set the cup in the sink. He kissed Sydney on the top of the head. "I'll see you in LA in a couple of days."

Sydney nodded as he picked up his bag and made way for the doors. She stayed back in the kitchen, watching her parent's interaction with fascination behind the glass. Deciding she should give them some private time together.

"You're leaving." Irina had sensed Jack coming up behind her.

"Yes, I have to get going if I am going to catch the next flight." He dropped his bag and stood behind her.

"I see." She nodded and changed the direction of her pose.

"Irina-"

"Jack, I'm sure you know by now that I am not good with 'goodbyes." Irina stopped, keeping her back to him. "Please, just tell me that this will all be over soon and that I will see you again."

"Yes, of course you'll see me again." He reached out placing his hand on her shoulder.

"I believe you." She felt the tears building in her eyes. She felt him moving, trying to face her but she cut him off, turning away once more. "Just go…please..."

Jack couldn't help but feel defeated and dropped his hand from her shoulder to retrieve his bag and head for the waiting car.

"Jack…"

He had walked a few steps when Irina called out his name.

He turned slowly to look at her. Tears streaming down her cheeks, a stray hair blowing across her eyes… She looked beautiful…

They looked at each other briefly before taking steps towards each other, throwing their' arms around the other's neck, holding on for dear life.

"I love you." She breathed into his neck and he pulled her in closer, kissing her cheek before feathering her entire head with kisses. Placing both hands on her belly, he gently bent over and kissed it. His eyes locked with hers and he pulled her in for one last deep, kiss before quickly picking up his bag, making his way back towards the driveway where the car was waiting.

Sydney, Vaughn and Katya had all watched the exchange from the kitchen, both of the women with tears in their' eyes. Irina had stood there, watching Jack's retreating form before dropping to sit on the bench, staring out at the gardens.

"I'm going to go talk to her." Sydney kissed Vaughn on the cheek and headed for the garden. "Mom…" She came up behind Irina, dragging her hand across her mother's back as she took a seat beside her.

"Hello, Sweetheart. Good morning." Irina smiled through her tears, honestly happy to see her daughter. She picked up Sydney's hand, holding it in her own. "Did you know that you used to sit out here with my mother, in the same spot, as you and I are now." She looked out over the gardens toward the lake and endless groves.

"Really?" Sydney was happy to hear, yet something else about her mother's past, also taking into consideration her mother had just diverted her attention away from her father's departure.

"So… did you have a good time last night?" Irina wiped the last stray tears from her face and brushed her hair behind her ear.

"Yeah, actually I did. We ran into Viktor…Vaughn's cousin."

"Really," Irina seemed mildly surprised but curious, "How'd that go?"

"Vaughn didn't tell him who he was, though Viktor had found it interesting how much Vaughn looked like his deceased uncle, Mikhail."

Irina nodded along, remaining silent and letting Sydney talk.

"It's all still so new to him… this part of his life. I think he just needs a little time to digest it all. There is so much he doesn't know about his father… There is still so much I don't know about you." Sydney squeezed her mother's hand, earning a small smile from Irina.

"Well, we're going on a little trip today. So you and Michael can learn a little bit more about your parents." Irina moved to stand, "If you want to?"

"Yes, of course." Sydney smiled brightly. "Where are we going?"

"To the country. We're going to take the train." Irina smiled and pulled Sydney to stand with her, wrapping an arm around her daughter's shoulders as they made their way inside.

* * *

**_*The Russian Dervish - Marta's Dance *_**

Sydney and Vaughn sat entranced on the train watching the beautiful Russian country side fly by, pointing out different things they saw and even cracking the occasion smile, much to Irina's delight.

"I feel like I am in 'Dr. Zhivago." Sydney smiled, shaking her head, "Riding on this train through the country." She looked around at every stop, enjoying the various people who got on and off the train at the quaint little villages.

St. Petersburg had become so Westernized, about like any city you'd find in Europe, but the further you got from the city, the more the 'Russian' culture could be seen.

About two hours into the trip, Irina pulled the stop chain, signaling their need to get off at the next station. "We're here." She smiled taking Sydney's hand as they stepped onto the train station's small platform.

"Where's here?" Sydney followed her mother, gawking at a family loading their colorful gypsy wagon with sacks of flour. Sydney smiled at the little girl in braids, petting her pig that was tied with a rope to the back.

"Gypsies. I love the gypsies." Irina whispered with a smile and she too waved at the little girl. "Here is Gryady." Irina signaled a car and opened the door. "This is where I was born Sydney." She smiled at Sydney's stunned expression.

"But I thought you were born in Moscow?" Sydney climbed in asking in Russian as her mother had switched languages as well to tell the driver where to go, not wanting to bring any additional attention.

"No, I was born here and we moved to Moscow when my father took the job with the government. I lived here until I was almost six." She smiled watching the old familiar scenery fly by. "I haven't been here in many years. Look…over there," She pointed out the window. "That was my first school."

It was a tiny little building with run down play equipment and children on swings; their faces were bright with smiles and laughter.

"This is all so amazing." Sydney shook her head, rolling down the window. "I'm still having a hard time remembering this is real and that you weren't born in Iowa like we've been led to believe all these years. But this is really making it real for me." She was quiet a moment then asked, "How you'd pick Iowa anyway?"

"Well the best lie is always the one closest to the truth as you know Sydney." Irina signaled the driver to turn down a road entering the forest before continuing. "In learning the about United States, I found the middle of the country to be most like the Russian country side, including the people and way of life. So, I chose to have 'Laura' be born in Grady, Iowa which isn't that far off from Gryady, my real place of birth."

Sydney nodded in understanding but said nothing, still feeling bizarre at hearing her mother referring to 'Laura' in third person. "What about your alias…'Laura'?" She found the courage to ask.

**_*Lara's Theme *_**

"Well, 'Dr. Zhivago' was always one of my favorites." She smiled and silence fell over the occupants in the car. "I even went there, once… to Grady, Iowa. To see what it was like. It was beautiful… made me feel at home and yet homesick all at once. Here we are." Irina smiled, when the car stopped in front of a small yellow house at the end of the road surrounded by gorgeous fields of wild flowers leading into the forest. She told the driver to wait and ushered the kids out. "This was my first home, Sydney."

The house was obviously occupied by another family now, the clothesline filled with small pairs of socks, pants and little dresses.

A woman opened the door and stood looking at the strangers observing her house, a tiny girl of about three years old with bright blue eyes and stark blonde hair was peeking out behind her mother's legs.

Irina walked up to the woman, introduced herself, and explained that she grew up in the house and was bringing her daughter back to see it. The woman smiled and nodded, allowing them inside.

It was very small, only two rooms and the woman explained that she had four children two girls and two boys, and one on the way. She reached out to touch Irina's belly and the two chatted briefly about due dates and other things.

The little girl was fascinated with Irina's long, dark hair and Irina knelt to talk to her. Something else surreal for Vaughn and Sydney too, seeing 'the mothering' Irina in action. Something Sydney only vaguely remembered.

Before leaving Sydney and Vaughn saw Irina give the woman an envelope, 'thanking' her once more for the hospitality.

As the car pulled away, the woman could be seen looking in the envelope then screaming and jumping for joy at the money it contained. Irina simply smiled and Sydney continued to look at her mother like she had two heads.

As the car drove back towards town, Irina pointed out the various places that held memories for her, such as the river she used to swim in and skate on in the winter, the very first tree she climbed and subsequently fell out of losing her first tooth.

They stopped in front of another house. It was bigger then the last one, they had visited and looked as though it was being taken better care of. There was fresh paint on the siding and the small porch even had a swing, similar to the one that Sydney grew up with. Tucked in the corner of the swing was a basket filled with yarn and knitting needles and a half made, something or other.

Irina turned to Vaughn. "Michael, this is your father's first…and last," She looked out the window briefly, "home." She watched as Vaughn swallowed hard, looking from her to the house. "This is also where your aunt and uncle live… and your grandmother, Natalia." She paused letting it sink in.

"They know who I am obviously, though I haven't seen them in many, many years… As with my parents and Sydney, they knew of your existence Michael and accepted, that they must love you from afar." She paused again, "I won't tell them who you really are. I will let you make that choice on your own." She patted his hand, "I just want to give you a chance to meet them." She opened the door and stepped out.

Sydney followed Vaughn from the car and reached for his hand, giving it a squeeze and nodding in understanding that it was going to be 'ok.'

"Irina…" A tall blonde man answered the door, obviously surprised and excited about his visitor. "Mama, it's Irina!" He called back into the house before taking Irina's face in his hands and peppering her cheeks with kisses. "Look at you, always so beautiful! And pregnant!" He laughed placing his hands on the sides of her belly dropping a kiss to it as well. "I can't believe it!" He let out a thunderous laugh as he held her face in his hands. "What a wonderful surprise!"

"Rina…" A petite, old woman with long white hair that had been tied into a bun immerged in the doorway, tears in her eyes, flashing a brilliant smile.

"Talia!" Irina smiled as the old woman took her face in her hands, kissing her cheeks in much the same fashion as Alexander, repeatedly commenting on Irina's beauty and how she had, 'missed the child.'

"And who is this beautiful girl?" The sweet old woman moved onto Sydney, cupping her face in the exact same way, admiring her face in a way that caused Sydney to smile.

"Talia, Alexander… this is my daughter," Irina's eyes were brimming proudly with unshed tears.

"This is Sydney?" Alexander exclaimed; a giant, surprised smile lighting is face, he picked Sydney up and twirled her around much to Sydney's surprise and Vaughn and Irina's amusement. "Oh, you are Irina's daughter, look at that face, Mama!" He squeezed Sydney's cheeks and moved her face toward the old woman.

"Oh, Child, do you know how much your mother has missed you?" Talia cried for Irina's happiness and kissed Sydney's cheeks.

Sydney nodded 'yes' to the old woman and looked to her mother, seeing that she had indeed let the tears flow.

"She has mourned for you everyday since she had to leave you." Talia took Irina's hand and connected it with Sydney's, causing Sydney to tear up as well.

"Talia, Alexander, there is someone else I would like you to meet," Irina stepped back exposing Vaughn to them with a smile, "This is Michael."

"Oh my God, Irina," Talia gasped, her hand going to cover her mouth as Vaughn walked up the last two steps toward them.

_***Leave No Man Behind***_

Smiling nervously, Vaughn took her outstretched hand and kissed 'his grandmother's' cheek. With shaking fingers, she reached out tentatively to brush Vaughn's cheek with the fingers of one hand while she continued to hold the other.

"Rina… he looks just like my Mikhail." She whispered.

And with the obvious love shown in his grandmother's eyes, and seeing she felt the same sense of loss over his father that he did, he made the choice and finally spoke to his grandmother in her native tongue.

"Mikhail was my father." He whispered back, adding a soft smile.

"My grandson!" She cried out and Alexander helped to support his mother, he was certain was about to faint.

"Yes, grandmother."

Talia clasped Vaughn's cheeks and kissed them relentlessly, chanting some Orthodox prayer, all the while crying and squeezing his cheeks, thanking God for sending her a gift.

Everyone was crying now at the happy reunion.

When she finally did let go of Vaughn's cheek's she refused to relinquish his hand as she gathered Irina up in the other arm, thanking her for such a gift and kissing her as well.

Vaughn's aunt Sarvina arrived home shortly after their arrival and was promptly introduced to her long lost nephew.

There was much to talk about and explain, which they did over lunch and through dinner before finally having to say their goodbye's so that Irina, Sydney and Vaughn could all catch the last train home.

Vaughn had learned of how his father spoke of nothing else but he and his mother and how much he loved and missed them. How he longed to be with them again. When the time had come to leave, they took pictures, and Vaughn vowed to stay in contact and visit when he could. He even promised to 'try' to bring his mother for a visit as well, as soon as she learned the truth and had time to accept it. He was sure with time she would.

The car ride to the train station had been in silence as everyone was tired from the long day and absorbing all that had transpired. Sydney and Irina had shared a seat across from Vaughn and Sydney had fallen asleep on her mother's shoulder once they boarded the train.

Irina and Vaughn sat in companionable silence for almost an hour when Vaughn turned his attention on Irina, staring intently at her for a number of minutes before she turned to smile at him.

"Thank you." He said nervously, than smiled softly when she did.

She reached across the aisle and placed her hand over his, taking hold of his fingers, and to her surprise, he let her. "It was the least I could do… for your father."

He nodded in appreciation and she released her hand from his, both missing the enormous smile forming on Sydney's 'supposedly sleeping' face at the thought everyone was finally making amends.

The last two days together had been some of the best of their lives for all three of them and it was a sad, terrible, goodbye, that left Sydney crying for the first two hours of the flight back to LA.


	17. Chapter 17

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): **__**I Miss You by Blink 182, Save Me by Remy Zero, Ashes to Ashes **_**by Hans Zimmer from Black Hawk Down Soundtrack**_**, This Woman's Work by Kate Bush, Fear by Sarah McLachlan**_

* * *

SEVENTEEN

o

_***I Miss You***_

As soon as they landed in LA, they threw themselves into helping the CIA locate Sloane and Cuvee. For almost two months, every time they had a lead, it would suddenly run cold, leaving them no further along in their investigation then they were before convincing Jack that Sloane had a mole working inside the CIA.

Both Jack and Sydney spoke with Irina at least once a week since they'd last seen her, checking in on her condition and the baby. Father and daughter had actually started having weekly, porch-swing talks about a wide variety of topics but mostly, about how much they missed being with Irina.

Sydney had told her father all about the beautiful little town in the country where Irina was born and had spent the earliest years of her life. She told him about Vaughn's family, and how overjoyed his grandmother was to find out she still had part of her son alive in Vaughn.

Jack was could hear the excitement and awe in Sydney's voice over the time she'd spent with her mother and he was elated, that she was finally getting her mother back.

It was on a Monday morning in late October that Jack awoke with a terrible feeling that something had gone terribly wrong. He called Sydney to make sure she was ok and then tried Irina…multiple times with no answer on her emergency line. By the time he arrived at work, he was panicked and already making flight-arrangements to St. Petersburg.

"Dad, what is it?" Sydney stood in the entrance to his office, watching as he hurriedly threw papers into his briefcase.

He motioned for her to come in and shut the door. He took out his pen to give them time to talk without the CIA hearing. "I can't get a hold of your mother. Something is not right. I just know it. I'm going to her."

"Well have you tried Katya?" Sydney asked trying to keep the panic from her voice.

"Yes, no answer." Jack looked up and placed a hand on Sydney's shoulder.

"You think Sloane or Cuvee's gotten to her?" Sydney's eye's started to tear up. "Don't you."

"I don't know what to think, I just know something is not right if both your mother and her sister aren't answering their phones."

Just then Jack's secured cell phone started ringing.

"Bristow." He answered quickly, hoping it was Irina.

"Jack. She's gone." Katya's quivering voice came over the line and Jack sank into his seat.

"What happened?" He felt the bile rising in his throat and swallowed it. "Start at the beginning."

"Last night, we… we were getting ready for bed and Irina said 'goodnight.' She went upstairs and I went into the kitchen with Dmitri, the next thing I know is that Dmitri is falling to the floor beside me, I turned to look and a man dressed in black, wearing a ski-mask has just shot me with something. As I slid to the floor a short man with grey hair and glasses appeared, telling the men to search the rooms for Irina."

'Sloane,' Jack seethed internally.

Katya's voice was trembling, "I just awoke and she's, she's gone, Jack! I don't know where they've taken her." She started sobbing into the phone.

"Are you ok? Is Dmitri, ok?" Jack asked in rapid succession causing Sydney's heart to sink, knowing that it wasn't her mother on the phone after all and something bad did indeed happen.

"Yes, we're both fine. Just tranquilizers." She sobered.

"Katya, I want you to use your and Irina's contacts through her organization and the government to search all airport logs for any small privately owned aircraft that left last night in the St. Petersburg area."

"Ok." She sniffled. "Jack, we have to find her."

"We will." Jack hung up the phone and stood in front of Sydney. "Sloane's taken your mother."

"Oh God," She started sobbing and he pulled her into his embrace. "What are we going to do?"

"I'm going to tell Devlin and Kendall, and we're going to use the CIA's resources to find her." He brushed the hair behind her ear, trying to comfort her and himself.

"And then what? Dad have you forgotten she's wanted by the CIA as well?" Sydney could not imagine this having a happy outcome.

"Sydney, we must find her whatever way we can. I will try to work something out with Devlin on the other matters. Her status has to be changing with all the new information coming in on her about the none existent deaths she facilitated."

Sydney nodded that this was the best option and they went to break the news to everyone else.

* * *

"Goddamn it, Jack!" Kendall boomed and threw a file he was holding when Jack told him about Sloane kidnapping Irina, causing the entire task force center to stop what they were doing.

"And what would you have done if it was your pregnant wife?" Jack started to shout back then calmed himself.

"I don't have a wife!" Kendall shouted back and slammed his fist onto the desk.

"Can't imagine why not?" Weiss said under his breath to Vaughn as they watched the display.

"Well just try for one second to put yourself in my shoes. What would you have done differently, what would you do now?" Jack stepped up to Kendall's challenge. "I've already gotten the approval from Devlin." Seeing the smoke start coming out of Kendall's ears he continued. "This is a chance to bring down Sloane once and for all and save Irina from whatever the hell plan he's concocted!" Adding softly so that only those closest could hear. "You saw the tapes… I cannot let her go through something like that again," He paused seeing Kendall soften slightly at the mentioning of Irina's torture tapes, "and I'm not about to lose another child."

"This wouldn't have happened, Jack, if you'd been honest about your 'contact.' We could have brought her in under protective custody." Kendall shifted his weight uncomfortably. "We could have worked something out."

Jack saw the hundreds of eyes on them and grabbed Kendall by the arm, pulling him into his office where he pulled out the pen again. "Right, since the CIA's Immunity Agreements are so trustworthy! I wasn't about to let her turn herself in without something in writing before hand, witnessed by at least twenty-five different individuals including the goddamn President! And I especially wasn't about to let that happen before we find Sloane's mole."

Kendall sighed in frustration. "Well where do we start looking then. Every lead we've had has run cold because of this proverbial mole."

"We've had our suspects and we've been patiently monitoring them for the last month. Time has run out." Jack stood straighter. "We have to start weeding out the mole, now."

"And how do you propose we do that?"

"By scaring the shit out of them, narrowing down suspects. We make each of them think we're 'on' to them. We need to leak the information covertly to Ops, via rumor, that there is a mole within the ranks. The mole will be so panicked knowing we are 'secretly' hunting for them, they're bound to make a mistake."

"Who do we get to start the rumor?"

"Marshall." They both said at the same time and Kendall slapped Jack on the back in search of the bumbling man who was going to help them find their mole.

* * *

Twenty-six agonizing hours later, Katya had called with the information that a man fitting Arvin Sloane's description was seen boarding a jet with another man carrying a sleeping pregnant woman at the airport in Novgorodskaya. The flight landed in Istanbul, Turkey yesterday but from there disappeared.

Sydney hadn't slept since her mother's disappearance and sat at her desk, rubbing her temples in frustration.

"Hey, thought you could use some fuel. You've been burning the mid-night oil." Weiss sat down on her desk offering up a sandwich, fries and a generously large cup of coffee.

"Thank you." She smiled at him sweetly. "You're a good friend."

"So… those days the three of you just 'disappeared," Weiss stole a fry and popped it into his mouth, "You were actually in Russia with your mom?"

"Yes." She admitted, hating that she had to lie to her friends, "Are you mad?"

"No." He smiled, "If my pregnant mother was on the CIA's _Most Wanted List_, I probably wouldn't offer up that information either."

Sydney was relieved that those closest to her understood her reasoning.

"Mike filled me in on everything. Said your mom was pretty 'ok' and not as horrific as we all thought she once was."

Sydney nodded sadly in agreement. "He even said she took the two of you to meet his grandmother and uncle and that you ran into his cousin at your mom's club. That you actually 'stayed' in Alexander Palace." He shook his head, "Sounds amazing. Next time you guys go, I want to come along. He said you have a 'hot, single cousin' who's a model I might be interested in."

That comment got Sydney to laugh in spite of the tragedy surrounding the day. "I think you're perfect for each other actually." She smiled and stuffed a fry into her mouth. "She likes to ask questions too."

"What's that supposed to mean?" He asked preparing to get back to work.

"Nothing, Eric." She laughed. "Don't worry about it."

"Ok, whatever you say 'Grand Duchess." He smirked loving the startled reaction from Sydney. "Or should I call you, Tsarevicha?" He asked earning him another bewildered look. "It's pretty common knowledge around here now." He smiled and dodged the evil glare she was flinging his way.

* * *

Two hours later:

"_Jack!_" Vaughn and Weiss raced to his side, pulling him into the 'flirting corner.'

"You know how you had us bug all the payphones in a ten mile radius of Ops with call tracers and optical cameras?" Weiss ran on excitedly.

"Yes." Jack's patience had run out long ago.

"Well with the Intel we received from Katya about Sloane's plane landing in Istanbul… we scanned all the phone records and found that at the very same time, a call made less then a mile from here was routed through Istanbul to a cell phone." Vaughn stopped to take breath and Jack's heart sped up.

"We scanned the footage taken from the phone booth at the time that call was placed and came up with a match." Weiss finished for Vaughn and opened a manila file containing video stills of the mole.

"Patrick Dennings: Analyst working with us on loan from NSA. Twenty-seven, no wife, no kids but massive gambling debts that were recently paid off… in full." Vaughn provided the background.

"How convenient." Jack snapped the folder shut.

"He's do to arrive at work any moment." Weiss shifted uncomfortably.

Jack's eyes snapped up and went in search of Kendall. He briefed Kendall and Dennings was shot with a mild tranquilizer dart in the parking ramp as he arrived.

Jack had taken the liberty of being the one to question him while Kendall paced behind the double-sided glass. Turned out the man was fairly weak and started talking after the first jolt of electrocution.

"Look, I was in trouble with gambling debts. They were going to kill me if I didn't come up with the money. This man approached me. Said he could help, if I helped him." He rambled, seeing the nasty look in Jack's eyes he pleaded again. "Look, man, I just needed the money so I agreed to help! He just wanted information that's it! I did what he told me to do and he paid me."

"So you paid your gambling debts with the life of my wife and unborn child, is that correct?" Jack touched the two ends together making them snap and crackle with the electrical current.

"No! I just gave him information." Patrick tried to back away from the crazed man with the cables.

"That led to the kidnapping of my wife. And now, she and my child may be dead because you helped a crazed terrorist to find her." Jack cranked the dial on the machine.

"No, man, I swear to you! He isn't going to kill her. He needed her alive." Dennings started to cry.

"Why?"

"I don't know exactly."

Jack cranked the currant up on the amp again and moved to touch Denning's leg once more.

"Ok! Ok! He's going to use her to create the perfect child. The child in 'Rambaldi's Prophecy."

"How? She's already pregnant." Jack paused in his movement.

"I don't know! I asked the same question and he said it was an 'unfortunate problem that he'd deal with." Patrick rambled on, sweating profusely.

At hearing that, Jack sent a burst of electricity firing through the man's body.

"Where are they?" Jack screamed at the young man withering beneath him.

"I don't know!" Dennings could barely make out.

"Where are they? " Jack screamed again.

"Maybe in Morocco."

Jack stopped. "Maybe Morocco?" He threatened to electroshock him again.

"Yes! Sloane had some medical equipment shipped there last month. He routed it through Spain to Morocco. Please, please, man, believe me! I'm not making this up. I have the coordinates. Just please stop!"

"I swear, to God, if there is one, that if you're lying… or if its too late when we get there… Nothing on this Earth will save you from the torture I will inflict upon your body living… and then dead."

* * *

-Undisclosed Location-

The last thing Irina remembered was falling fast asleep in her bed, and having a horrible nightmare that she was drugged and kidnapped by Sloane. Her head pounding, feeling as though she had a hangover, she struggled to open her eyes.

Finally able to open them in slits, she tried to move her hand to shield her eyes from the bright lights but found her arms bound to the bed. Panic hit her in an instant and she forced her eyes open whether they were ready to dilate or not.

There, sitting so smug at the end of her bed was Arvin Sloane. She hadn't been dreaming.

"Good morning, Irina." He smiled moving to stand at the bed beside her. "I hope you slept well and that the journey here wasn't too rough on you or the baby." He placed his palm over her belly and caressed the mound beneath the nightgown she was now wearing that was not her own.

"You bastard!" She hissed wriggling against her restraints in attempt to get his hand off her.

"Now, now, Irina. There is no need to be hostile. I think that if you calm down and hear me out, that you might be interested in a 'new' partnership in the sake of Rambaldi. Despite the fact you shot me, I am still willing to work with you."

"I'd rather be dead." She glared at him, her vision slowly returning to normal.

"Well, that too can be arranged when I'm finished but it would be such a shame for your other two children to have to grow up without their mother like Sydney did." He smiled smugly, knowing he had her full attention now.

"Two other children? What are you talking about, Arvin?"

"Well, the beautiful baby girl your carrying now of course," Seeing her startled expression that he knew the sex he added, "Yes, we took the liberty of giving you an ultrasound when you arrived to make sure that the baby wasn't harmed in any way. I know you think I'm a monster but I would never hurt an innocent child on purpose. I've told you before how much I love Sydney and think of her as my own."

"I warned you to never speak to me of your love for Sydney again! Especially not after what you did to her. Killing her fiancé, her best friend and sending the double to kill her. Oh yes, and then there was that whole ordeal in Moscow."

Sloane was suddenly put on the defense, "That was not my intent. That was Cuvee's doing. He didn't follow the plan. But enough about that, Irina," He brought the chair closer to her bed taking a seat beside her, "I've managed to decode all the Rambaldi manuscript pages. What we've been searching for all this time was right in front of us."

"What are you talking about?" Irina asked again, annoyed. "I don't care about Rambaldi anymore."

_***Save Me ***_

"Oh, but you should, Irina. It is your destiny as it is mine."

"Would you stop being so fucking cryptic, Arvin?" Irina yelled at him.

"It is not I, who has been less then forth coming with their' knowledge Irina. How long have you known that your family, the Romanov's, family advisor Rasputin was a direct descendent of Rambaldi?"

Irina remained silent.

"And isn't it interesting that it is you, 'The One' the 'The Romanov' the Tsar of Russia, who also happens to be 'The Chosen One' in Rambaldi's prophecy whose direct descendent Rasputin, was murdered by your family…"

"He was a traitor who sold my family out for money and power!" Irina shouted.

"He was a brilliant man with magical powers just as father's father before him. They all carried the greatness of Rambaldi inside them." He paused and straightened his short stature, "But now the time has come for the descendents of the two houses, Romanov and Rambaldi, to begin a new by creating the child that will bring all the world within our grasp." He paused waiting to gauge her reaction. "I can see your mind is racing trying to figure out, who is the descendent from the house of Rambaldi that will father your child, Irina. I won't keep you in suspense any longer," He leaned over and whispered in her ear, "It is I."

"You're insane if you think I am ever going to have a child with you! I will never let you put your slimy hands on me!" She spat in anger.

There are other ways." He replied calmly. "And yes, I am aware that unlike me, you are willing to kill an innocent baby, so I cannot trust you to carry such a precious gift."

"What the hell does that mean?" She screamed angrily as two nurses came in and injected something into her IV line, bringing on a wave of nausea. "What are you doing, Arvin? I'm pregnant for God-sake! You're hurting my baby!"

"I've taken all the necessary precautions I can to ensure your child's safety during the operation and when she's born, as she needs to be healthy. She will make some wonderful, desperate family very happy when I sell her on the Black Market." He stood back as they began to wheel Irina into surgery.

"Noooo!" She screamed fighting the anesthetics. "I will kill you if you take my baby!"

"She deserves a decent mother, one who won't abandon her at the first sight of trouble. She will be loved, Irina."

* * *

_***Ashes to Ashes***_

"We need to move faster!" Jack shouted into his com-link as they raced their Humvees through the desert night, thankful for the cloud cover. The last thing they needed was the moon illuminating their arrival.

"We're going as fast as we can, we should be there ten minutes." The young Marine corporal driving answered back.

They had landed in Casablanca a little less then an hour ago and were now racing west into the Sahara where Sloane's compound was supposedly located given the coordinates they'd gotten out of Dennings.

Once stopped a mile away at their drop point, everyone got out to evaluate their' surroundings.

"These aren't the coordinates!" Vaughn shook his head, holding up a map and pointing to where the compound was supposed to be. "That's a giant sand dune. The son-of-a-bitch lied, Jack!"

Jack wasn't about to give up and grabbed the map and coordinates from Vaughn.

"I've doubled checked them."

Jack threw the map in the sand and reached for his pack, searching for his night vision goggles. Snapping them in place he scanned the massive dune in the horizon. "There!" He shouted, pointing to a faint, blinking, red light near the bottom of the dune. Picking up his pack and gun he began moving; Sydney, Vaughn, Weiss, and Dixon followed; the Marine and Delta troops on standby for the extraction order. "They disguised the compound as a dune so it wouldn't be spotted from the air. Bastard!"

"Genius." Weiss shook his head and locked his goggles into place.

They began crawling the last 100 meters on their bellies to an overlooking dune before splitting up into teams of two and three.

"I've got three guards in the front, Boy Scout, how many do you have?" Dixon searched the compound with his night-scope binoculars.

"We've got three in the back as well. On my signal, move in."

There was silence for a moment and then, "Go! Go! Go!"

The guards were simultaneously attacked and had no idea what hit them. Dixon and Weiss stormed in the front, their priority to disarm the security systems from the main office and loop the cameras, giving Vaughn, Sydney and Jack time to find Irina and Sloane.

Weiss and Dixon made their way into the main office and Weiss began scanning the rooms for Irina and Sloane's location while Dixon began looping the cameras.

"Okay, I've got her and Sloane." He pounded furiously at the keyboard, as he signaled Vaughn with their location. "Boy Scout, they have her in the far end of the compound. Looks like they are in an Operating Room, they just finished surgery on her." He swallowed hard.

"What?" Jack took over from Vaughn, "What is their location, now!"

Weiss scanned the camera monitors finding the threesome and began directing them towards the operation room.

"Sir, we have a security breach!" A guard, heavily armed, stormed into the operating room, paying no mind to the fact that it should have been a sterile environment.

"Hurry!" Sloane instructed the man placing test tubes containing Irina's eggs into a dry ice container.

Once securely packed, Sloane ripped off the surgical mask he was wearing and began running out with the rest of the men where they came face to face in a standoff with Sydney, Vaughn, and Jack.

A shootout followed though, the threesome, were at a disadvantage having to take very precise shots as to not hit Irina, lying directly behind the glass and Sloane's guards; one stray bullet could kill her.

"Let us go, Jack, and you can have your precious Irina. I don't need her anymore. I'll leave with what I want, and you with what you want… we both win." Sloane yelled from behind the corridor he was hiding.

"Never!" Jack screamed back, loading another round of ammunition.

"Then I'm afraid my friend, you've left me with no choice." Sloane emerged from behind the wall, the dry ice container securely under, one arm, a semi-automatic aimed directly at Irina's head behind the glass.

"No!" Sydney shouted and lunged forward, only to be stopped by her father's arm.

"Ok, Arvin." Jack knelt slowly, lowering his weapon to the floor. "We'll let you go. Just don't shoot. Please."

Vaughn and Sydney lowered theirs' as well.

"My how times have changed, Jack," Arvin smiled snaking his way toward the door, protected by his guards, "Not too long ago you asked for my help in tracking down your traitorous wife, so that 'you' could kill her. You, Jack… almost had her executed for something she didn't do and then you tried to kill her again in Moscow. Now here you are begging me to spare her life. I think I'll do us all a favor and rid her from our lives."

In what felt like slow motion, Sloane raised his gun and fired, the sound of the glass window shattering deafening.

"Mom!" Sydney screamed seeing the red blood instantly seeping from Irina's body.

Jack and Vaughn simultaneously lunged for their strewn weapons firing at a retreating Sloane. Jack took a hit in the shoulder trying to shield an unprotected Sydney from the hailstorm of fire.

Vaughn fired at them until his magazine ran empty and only the sound of clicking remained. "Jack, are you okay?" He helped him to his feet noticing the blood running down his arm, and then helped Sydney.

"I'm fine. Sydney?" He scanned his daughter for any sign of blood, seeing none he ran to Irina whose heart monitor was now going ballistic.

"Get the extraction team in here immediately, we have two hit, I repeat we have two persons hit!" Vaughn spoke frantically, into his Com.

"Shit! Get out now, Boy Scout! They've overridden the system and activated a self-destruct!" Weiss grabbed his gun and made way for the extraction point with Dixon, sending the message through that they would need immediately medical attention.

"Come on Irina, hang on!" Jack commanded her unconscious form as Vaughn and Sydney flew around the room searching for gauze and other materials to stop the bleeding in both Irina and Jack.

"Thank God, his aim was off." Jack pointed with his eyes to where the bullet actually hit the metal surgical table just beside Irina's head and instead bounced up and went through her shoulder. He worked feverishly to stuff gauze in the wound to stop the bleeding long enough to get out of the building.

Sydney grabbed an additional IV and unhooked her mother's current one, squeezing as much fluid as she could into her. "How we going to get her out?" She asked, panicked looking at her father's injured arm and down to her very pregnant mother. "You can't carry her."

"No, but I can." Vaughn dove right into action propping Irina up and then scooping her up into his arms, with Sydney following closely behind, squeezing the IVs.

"Get out! Get out! Get out!" Weiss was screaming into their Coms, as they did the best they could to run out of the compound with Irina, and Jack about to pass out.

Vaughn's arms, legs and lungs were burning by the time they reached the top floor and ran as fast as they could away from the building.

They'd made it nearly 500 feet away when the building erupted in explosion, the force blowing them all forward.

Vaughn shielded Irina and the baby, while Jack covered Sydney. Weiss and Dixon ran back to help them with Weiss picking up Irina and placing her in the back of the Humvee.

"A medical chopper is on their way, we're going to drive as far, and as fast as we can to meet them!" Dixon shouted over the roar of the engines. "Sloane got away." He confirmed for Jack, who was stroking Irina's forehead while the onboard medical team attended to he and Irina. "He had a helicopter waiting for him."

**_*This Woman's Work*_**

Once meeting the chopper, they were flown out sea where they landed on the US Naval Aircraft carrier the USS Kitty Hawk, currently at sea off the shores of Western Africa. A team had whisked Irina and Jack away immediately, taking them in separate directions to be treated.

It had been five hours since Irina had been taken into surgery and now there was nothing left to do, except to sit and wait.

Jack had taken up residence right out side the operation room the moment his wound was treated, where he joined Sydney and Vaughn who were already waiting for word.

As the first hour went by, Weiss and then Dixon had come to wait with them as well. Each of them taking turns pacing the halls and thankful for the young Seaman assigned by the Captain to bring them coffee, food and anything else they might need. Dixon had called Kendall for Jack, relaying the mission status and to report that they had Irina in their custody, but that she was in Critical Condition.

Around the third hour, the Captain himself, came down when the rumors started circulating the carrier that the people they'd brought on board were actually CIA agents and the pregnant woman in surgery was actually a high priority terrorist, accused of murdering at least thirteen CIA agents while undercover for the KGB. The fact that this same woman was also married to, and carrying the baby, of one of the CIA agents who was waiting in the hall for her to get out of surgery, and the mother of another, fast becoming the hottest topic on the ship.

Jack, Sydney and Vaughn, all assured the Captain that Irina was no threat to the carrier or crew, especially in her condition but he insisted on posting a guard outside the operating room door anyway.

It was in that fourth and fifth hour that time really began taking its toll. Jack and Sydney's minds racing with all kinds of thoughts… 'What if they lose the baby? Would they have to take the baby early? What if they lose Irina? What if they lose them both? What was left unsaid between them? Did she really know how much they loved her? Did she have the strength to fight for her life one more time?' There was nothing they could do, but wait and pray for another miracle… two actually.

It was in that fifth hour that Jack was shaken from his line of thinking.

"Agent Bristow?" A doctor in blue scrubs approached him solemnly, removing her hair cover.

"Yes," Jack stood immediately with a sinking feeling in his chest. "I'm Agent Bristow."

"Mother and baby are both doing fine." The doctor offered a small smile to the weary group. The rumors behind the woman they'd been operating on making it all the way into the Operating Room during surgery.

A giant sigh of relief went up around the room.

"Both are holding in stable condition for now."

"Did you have to take the baby?" Jack's heart pounded in his chest thinking about his daughter being born prematurely.

"No." She smiled, "Mom' was able was able to hold onto her. We were able to stop the labor the shock to her system threw her body into. The baby is still fairly tiny and needs all the time in the womb she can get. 'Mom' should be able to deliver normally if there isn't too much stress put upon her heart during labor. Otherwise a Caesarean birth will be necessary."

"Oh, thank you, God." Sydney squeezed her father's arm.

"I do have some questions. How long ago did your 'wife?" She paused waiting for Jack to confirm the rumor before continuing.

"Yes, my wife."

"How long ago did your wife have open heart surgery and what were the circumstances surrounding it?"

"About five months ago. She was shot… she sustained a tear in her Aorta and punctured lung." Jack offered to the stunned doctor who wasn't dismissing the part of the rumors that proclaimed this woman one 'bad-ass terrorist' any more.' Clearly, this woman had a way of finding trouble. "And I'm going to assume that the egg extraction surgery, was performed in the last ten hours as she was still unconscious from the previous anesthetic when she was brought in?" She looked around, surprised to find 'surprise' evident on their faces.

"Yes, she just had surgery but, excuse me," Jack looked horrified, "did you just say egg extraction?"

"Yes, you didn't know what surgery had been performed on her?" She looked incredulously at this woman's supposed husband.

"No… it's a long story." Jack sighed and dropped heavily into the chair. "How long before she's conscious?"

"I would say at least another 10 hours given the copious amounts of anesthetic she's been given in the last 24 hours and the combined stress on her body and the baby."

"Isn't all that anesthetic going to hurt my sister?" Sydney asked, just now realizing if it was knocking her mother out for this long, what was it doing to the baby. Receiving a strange look from the confused doctor she elaborated, "The baby."

'_Ah, another part of the rumor proved true. 'This' agent was her daughter._' The doctor thought to herself. "She should be fine. Babies in the third trimester are rarely affected by substances such as alcohol and narcotics that would terminate or cause defects as they do with babies in the first and second trimesters." She tried to reassure them, "Besides, she's hung on this long, with your mother's previous bullet wound earlier in the pregnancy, the surgery to remove your mother's eggs and this last incident…I would bet that your baby sister is just as tough as her mother. She's a fighter." She smiled. "I'm Lt. Julie MacKenzie in case you need anything else."

"Thank you, doctor." Jack clasped her hand with both of his.

"You can go in and sit with her once they move her out of Post-Op, which will be about thirty minutes." She glanced down to her watch. "Go get something to eat, take a warm shower or catch a quick nap." She nodded, seeing that in their stubbornness, they weren't going anywhere.

* * *

14 hours later...

"Mom." Sydney was at her mother's side instantly, seeing Irina's eyes struggling to flutter open.

"Sydney. " Irina's voice was raspy, still unsure if this was reality or if she was still in the nightmare.

"Yeah, Mom, its me." Sydney gently took hold of her hand and stroked the hairs off her mother's brow. "Dad's here too."

"Jack." She turned her head slightly to see Jack standing beside her. "Am I dreaming or hallucinating?"

He bent over and kissed her on the lips, "I'm here."

"The baby…" Her eyes flew open and she glanced down the bed, happy to see the giant belly still there, Irina's eyes started to tear.

"She's ok, Irina." Jack dropped his forehead to hers. "You're both ok. Sloane shot you in the shoulder while he was escaping, but you're both ok."

Irina's hand immediately sought out the new shoulder wound covered in bandages. "He said he was going to sell her on the Black Market, Jack." A lone tear escaped, making its way down her cheek.

"Who was going to sell who, Irina?" Jack reached up and brushed the tear away.

"Arvin… was going to sell Lena on the Black Market." She ran her hand over her baby still protected within the confines of her body, and Sydney began to cry seeing the horror in her mother's eyes.

"You're safe, the baby's safe…he can never hurt this family again."

"Yes, he can, Jack." She gained control over her emotions again. "He did it… didn't he? He stole my eggs." She looked back and forth from her husband and daughter.

"Yes." Jack took a seat on the bed next her.

"Oh, my God, Jack… your arm?" Irina reached out tentatively, running her fingers over the soft material of the sling, having just noticed now that her vision had returned to normal.

"Sloane's men. It's nothing." He smiled at her, getting a small smile in return at his 'word play.' "Irina, do you know what he's planning to do?"

"Where are we?" Irina asked suddenly noticing her surroundings.

"In the sublevels of the USS Kitty Hawk."

"We're on an aircraft carrier?" She looked at Sydney bewildered. "Where?"

Sydney was of course, surprised that her mother knew what the USS Kitty Hawk even was, but then again…"Yes. Off the cost of Africa."

"Africa?"

"Sloane was holding you in a compound disguised as a giant sand dune in the Sahara. You had no idea where you were?"

"No. I'd just barely been awake when he told me his insane plan and asked me to join him," Seeing the flash of panic on both Sydney's and Jack's faces she continued, "Of course I said 'no' or 'I'd rather die', or something along those lines. And then I was off to surgery so that he could steal my eggs. Bastard-ass…" She added under her breath, clenching her fists. "How did you find me? And how'd we get here?"

"It's a long story that I promise to fill you in on shortly, but why does Sloane want your eggs? Other then we know you're the one in the prophecy." Jack tried to get the conversation back on its original track.

Irina looked at him annoyed, "One of the predictions Rambaldi made was the massacre of my family, the Romanovs, during the Revolution. This 'act would change the course of many lives', which obviously it has." Irina grasped Sydney's hand and held it tightly, "Before the massacre, my family's long time, trusted friend and advisor Rasputin, began plotting against them with the Revolutionaries. My grandfather, Nicholas, ordered him to leave and never return or he would be punished by death. Rasputin returned and was executed for his crimes against the family, which included plotting to have them killed."

"Ok, but what does this all have to do with Arvin Sloane stealing your eggs?" Jack interrupted not seeing where this was going.

"Dad, let her finish!" Sydney scolded her father finding all this terribly fascinating, as it was her history.

"Rambaldi had also predicted this, the division of those two houses, because Rasputin was a direct descendent of… Rambaldi. According to Rambaldi's prophecy, the descendents of those two opposing houses, Rambaldi and Romanov, would be the ones to fulfill his ultimate prophecy, to begin anew, by creating the child that will bring all the world within his or her grasp."

"This just keeps getting more bizarre…" Sydney could hardly wrap her mind around it all. "So, who is the descendent of Rambaldi that Sloane plans on fertilizing your eggs with to create this child?"

"You once told me that Arvin believed himself to be a descendent of Rambaldi?" Jack swallowed hard, mentally putting the pieces together in his mind.

"Yes." Irina looked to him with sad eyes, "Rasputin is Arvin Sloane's great-grandfather. 'He' is the descendent of Rambaldi. He plans on fertilizing them himself."

"Eww!" Sydney her head at the terrible thought of Sloane making a child with her mother. "But wait! Rambaldi prophesized that you, 'The Chosen One,' the Romanov descendent, would 'bring the world its greatest gift, or its utter desolation," She paused thinking back to the prophecy, "Which the 'greatest gift' has to be this 'union child."

Things were rapidly coming together for Sydney as well, "And 'utter desolation'… by stopping the creation of this 'gift child' of Rambaldi's descendent… by stopping Sloane."

"Or the other way around," Jack began using reverse psychology, "That Irina's 'greatest gift to the world' would be the stopping the creation of this 'union child' by stopping Sloane, or bringing 'utter desolation' to it, if she doesn't stop it… and the child is born."

"Yes." Irina breathed a sigh of relief, "That is what I believe too." She was so happy to have Jack who could run game theory with her, think along the same lines.

"Think about it, Sydney, if he, Rambaldi, wanted this 'child' to be born, he would write the prophecy using reverse psychology and still be able to write the 'truth," Jack paused making sure she was keeping up with this line of thinking, "By phrasing the words just so…if any government or organization, like the CIA for example, read and interpreted the prophecy the way you just did Sydney, the way most people would…they'd believe that unless this child was born, the world would, 'fall into utter desolation,' and therefore do anything in their power to keep your mother, 'The Chosen One' from stopping this 'prophecy child's' birth."

"Making Mom the proverbial 'bad guy." Sydney was catching on.

"The wording and expected interpretation, is like Rambaldi's own failsafe to ensure this child would be born." Jack added, now that they were all thinking on the same page.

"And then the prophecy 'would' come true, because by the birth of that child, would bring 'utter desolation to the world' we know. My God, that's brilliant." Sydney was amazed by it all, "Well it makes sense," Sydney poured a cup of water for herself from her mother's tray and then one for each of her parents. "Sloane: evil. Rasputin: evil. Rambaldi: evil… think about all of those horrible inventions of his..." She shook the mental image of the burned corpses left behind in Mexico after one of Rambaldi's inventions out of her head. "Evil runs in that family obviously, it's not a stretch of the imagination to believe that 'this child' will be as well. No offense, Mom. I don't mean that you have-"

"No offense taken, Sweetheart," Irina smiled and took her hand again. "I know what you meant."

"Well, it also explains why Sloane tried to kill you once he had your eggs." Jack ran his thumb over the back of Irina's hand, "He wanted to get rid of the only real 'threat' to this child's birth… you. Because according to the prophecy, only 'The Chosen One' can stop him."

Irina closed her eyes and covered them with her hand, "I just want this to be over." When a minute of silence passed, with eyes still closed, "So can you please tell me now how Sloane got me in the first place, how you found me and how we ended up here?" In a second her mind flashed and she grabbed Jack's arm, "Katya… Dmitri… are they ok?" Her eyes filled with fear, remembering they were at the house too.

"Yes," Jack smiled, "They're fine. Sloane used tranquilizer darts." Relief flooded over Irina as Jack continued. "Katya tracked Sloane's plane to Istanbul and from there it disappeared. We realized sometime ago that the CIA had a mole and we knew we had to flush him out. Agents Vaughn and Weiss traced the mole's call from a payphone in LA that was routed through Istanbul to a cell phone that was unregistered. We knew we had Sloane's mole so…"

"You interrogated him." Irina nodded along.

"Yes…" Jack agreed quietly, "And he confessed to giving Sloane your location and tipping him off. He told us Sloane had recently shipped medical equipment to the coordinates in the desert where we found you."

"And why this ship?"

"With both you and Dad shot," Sydney began, "we needed a CIA approved medical facility ASAP."

Jack and Sydney proceeded to fill Irina in on all the details surrounding their escape from the exploding compound and Irina's 'real savior,' Agent Vaughn.

Three short raps at the door announced a visitor. The young Seaman from before stood at attention when Jack opened the door.

"Yes."

"Agent Bristow, you have a shore-to-ship call from a Director Kendall." The young man stood nervously, his eyes wandering briefly to the beautiful pregnant woman in the bed he'd heard so much about. Thinking she 'didn't look all that dangerous but intriguing… and who was that hot girl next to her?' "Captain says you can take it on the bridge. I am under orders to bring you there now, sir."

"Thank you, Seaman." Jack nodded solemnly, looking back to Irina and Sydney. Sydney looked somewhere between, panicked, frustrated and terrified. Irina's gaze just held on Jack and then nodded, silently giving him her approval to go. She had no other choice.

"We're going to have to bring you in." Sydney looked sadly at her mother.

_***Fear ***_

"I know." Irina ran her hands over her large belly, thinking about going back to that cell, pregnant and so close to her due date.

"I'm sorry." Sydney added softly, ashamed that there was nothing she could do.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Sydney. This is my mess." Irina extended her hand, waiting for Sydney to accept it before continuing. Squeezing her daughter's hand she continued. "Everything will work out, you'll see."

Less then a minute later, a Marine Officer appeared at the door. "Excuse me, ma'am." He pushed past Sydney and went to stand beside Irina. "Sorry, ma'am," He took Irina's uninjured arm and cuffed it to the metal railing of the bed. "But I'm under Captain's Orders to secure you until the doctor gives clearance for you to be moved to the brig, to await your transfer."

Sydney moved to stop him, put up a fight on her mother's behalf, but Irina shook her head 'no.'

The young Marine fumbled nervously, finding it hard to concentrate with Irina trying to look him in the eye. With another "Sorry, ma'am," he was out the door.

"Mom," Sydney rushed to her side when he was gone.

"Sydney, it's ok." She reached her cuffed fingers out to her daughter, "I'm not going anywhere, anyway. But, Sweetheart, I have a request. Could you please tell Michael to come in here?"

Sydney's ears and smile perked up at her mother's request and the use of Vaughn's first name.

"I would like to speak with him… Thank him for saving my life… your sister's life." Irina smiled shyly at her daughter.

"Ok," Sydney leaned forward and kissed her mother's cheek, "I'll send him in."

"Thank you."

A very nervous Vaughn appeared at the door moments later. He knocked, and wiped his sweaty brow before entering.

"Agent Vaughn." Irina greeted him with a smile from where she was propped up in her bed. One arm chained to the railing, the other in a sling.

"Irina." He smiled nervously standing by the door.

"Come sit." She nodded with her head towards the chair next to the bed that Sydney had just left.

Hesitantly, he moved and took a seat, uncomfortable under Irina's stare.

"I asked Sydney to find you, because… I understand it was you, who saved our lives, mine' and the baby's. "

Vaughn's gaze shifted nervously towards the floor.

"You didn't have to... and I know you did it for Sydney, but… I wanted to say, thank you, Michael."

Vaughn's eyes flew up to meet hers. "It was the right thing to do." He answered, his eyes never leaving hers. "And I didn't just do it for Sydney."

Irina's lips curled into a smile small, looking away for a moment with a slight nod of acceptance. She and Mr. Vaughn were making some headway and it pleased her.

"How are you feeling?" Vaughn cleared his throat, still intimidated by conversing with this woman.

"Like I've been shot and drugged and there is, what feels like a small car, sitting on my bladder, but otherwise ok."

That comment got Irina her intended response, for Vaughn to crack a smile.

"Do they really think this is necessary?" He tugged slightly on her cuffs causing the metal to clink and Irina's dangling hand to sway.

"I guess they're worried I will try escaping by offing three thousand sailors and commandeering this ship." She shrugged.

"What are you saying? You aren't capable of doing so?" Vaughn snickered, enjoying the banter.

"I didn't say I wasn't capable of doing so, Agent Vaughn," She smiled her Cheshire cat grin, "but it does make it quite a bit more difficult while I am still under the influence of drugs, recovering from a gun shot wound, unable to use three of the four fingers left on my only other hand and nine months pregnant. Not that I intend to."

Vaughn couldn't stop his smile and started to laugh. He could see now where Sydney apparently got her humorous side from... Irina Derevko of all people.

"Jack," Irina looked up and smiled as Jack entered the small room.

"Vaughn," Jack acknowledged the younger man and then noticed Irina's new 'bracelet.' "What the hell is this?" He strode quickly to Irina's side giving Vaughn an accusatory, stern look.

"It wasn't his doing, Jack," Irina interjected on Vaughn's behalf as Jack took seat on the edge of the bed. "A young Marine officer said it was Captain's Orders until I was 'okayed to be moved to the brig', which I assume means onboard prison."

Jack nodded solemnly that it was, "The doctor will be in shortly to check you over," he paused hesitantly, "and then you'll be taken to the brig. I'm sorry, but I am under Orders, too."

"I understand," Irina looked away momentarily in thought about what all this means. "And then?"

"A transport will be here in 10 hours to take us back to shore. From there you'll be transferred to the facility in LA." He gave Irina a small smile when her eyes perked up thinking about being near Jack and Sydney at least, "I got Devlin to approve it. From there, we'll work out the details on how we can get you released… before the baby arrives."

* * *

Four days later:

CIA Operations Center

Los Angeles, CA

"Syd," Marshall flew over to where Sydney sat staring at a computer screen, scanning possible new Intel into Sloane's whereabouts and the decoded Rambaldi documents about the 'union child', "The call just came in." He said breathlessly, "The plane landed twenty minutes ago from Washington…" He scanned his watch, "Your mother should arrive in five minutes." He gave her a sad smile.

"Thanks, Marshall." She nodded, bracing herself for her mother's arrival.

The Department of State had demanded that Irina be kept at Langley for questioning before releasing her to be transferred to Los Angeles. Both she and her father were refused access to Irina and neither had seen her since she was escorted off the runway at Reagan International, four days ago when they'd landed. Sydney snapped from her thoughts when she saw her father and Kendall approaching.

"You've heard?" Jack asked.

"Yeah," She looked sadly at her father, "Marshall just informed me."

"Let's go."

Kendall glanced up at the monitors showing the arrival of the armored truck transporting Irina. "She's here."

The doors of the truck opened and Irina felt temporarily blinded by the guard's flashlights as they stepped up to unlock her shackles. The shoulder she'd been shot in, was securely fastened to her body with an immobilizing device to help healing, her shackled wrists, resting upon her belly were connected to a waist chain that hung below her very pregnant belly, connecting to the shackles of her feet. Two guards, she recognized from her previous stay, helped her off the back of the truck. A sudden surge of dread coursed through Irina as she was escorted into the cell-block. The sound of the shackles clanking together and dragging across the floor bringing back horrible memories she'd rather not remember...

"Mom." Sydney called out as both rounded a corner and came face to face. Irina finally giving a small smile at seeing her daughter. Sydney's momentary smile at seeing her mother faded as quickly, as she saw the restraints and heavily armed guards. "Dad," She looked helplessly to Jack as Irina shuffled passed them into her glass cell.

"Kendall," Jack's piercing eyes bore into the man beside him, "Was that necessary?" He watched as the guards unshackled Irina.

"I didn't have a say," Kendall looked towards the woman behind the glass he hadn't seen since her escape, almost nine months ago; her very pregnant form surprising him in its reality and catching him off guard temporarily as he waited for the men to leave the cell.

"Irina, are you ok?" Jack reached out, placing his one good hand on her arm.

His wounded arm fastened securely to his body with the same immobilizer as Irina's. He scanned her body and face looking for any signs of mistreatment or abuse. Wanting so badly to hug her but knowing he couldn't while security cameras were on with the entire Ops floor watching.

"I'm fine, Jack." She replied quietly. "I'm tired…but I'm fine."

Jack looked to the cold, hard metal bunk occupying her cell with no cushion, pillow or blanket and then to Irina's damaged pregnant body. "She can't sleep on this." He stated firmly, giving a silent order to Kendall.

"I'll see what I can do." He nodded in concession from where he was watching behind the glass. "Ms. Derevko." He acknowledged Irina.

"Agent Kendall." Irina gave a slight nod in response.

As Kendall went in search of someone who could supply the items, Sydney joined her parents in the cell…not having the same restraint as her father, she launched herself at her mother, wrapping her arms fiercely around her neck, mindful of Irina's healing shoulder wound. Neither woman said anything, but remained locked in a hug for quite sometime.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Sydney finally stepped back, unshed tears pooling in her eyes.

"Yes, Sweetheart." Irina gave a small smile trying to reassure her daughter.

"And Lena?" Sydney placed her hand over her mother's belly.

"Rapidly running out of room." She smiled at the girth of her size.

"Only five days until your due date…" Sydney let it hang in the air.

"I'm working as fast as I can to get you released before then." Jack swallowed hard, knowing what a difficult task that was.

Irina nodded and watched as a young guard, followed by Kendall, brought in a mattress, two pillows and blankets and sheets.

"Jack tells us you want to cooperate." Kendall folded his arms across his chest, having a stare down with Irina. "You've said that before…How do I know this isn't another one of your elaborate schemes? Something to further your next plan? How do you expect us to trust you again?"

"I do want to cooperate, Director Kendall." Irina's voice taking on a more serious tone, "I 'have' been cooperating. I've given you everything I'd acquired on Arvin Sloane even before I was in CIA custody…and the only plan I have now," She looked from Kendall to Jack and Sydney, "Is doing whatever it takes to help bring down Sloane and free myself, my daughters…my family from this business and try to live as normal a life as possible. I want to help." She returned her hardened stare to Kendall, "And as far as trust…well that's something that both of us are going to have to try and regain if we want to capture Sloane. I'm willing…if you are."

Kendall looked from Irina to Jack and Sydney and nodded slowly while speaking, "You should get some rest. We'll start in the morning." He nodded 'goodnight' to them all and left for the day.

"Yeah, Mom, you should try to get some sleep." Sydney grasped her mother's hand and gave her a light kiss on the cheek. "I'll bring you breakfast in the morning. Ok?" he smiled, trying to not be so depressed by the situation.

"Ok Sweetheart, I'd like that." She pulled Sydney in for one last hug, not wanting to relinquish the hold on her. "Sleep well Sydney." She kissed her daughter's hairline before releasing her.

"Dad, are you coming?" Sydney paused in the doorway, eyeing both her parents.

"I'll be there in a minute Sydney." He nodded in her direction indicating he wanted a few minutes alone with her mother.

"Ok. Goodnight, Mom." She gave a small smile and disappeared down the hall.

"Jack," Irina began when Sydney had gone, running her thumb over her aching shoulder, "I don't want to have this baby in a prison cell." She swallowed hard thinking back to the last time she was pregnant in captivity.

"I know." Jack's hand returned to her arm, leading her over to sit on the bed. "I'm going to do everything in my power to get you released, at least into my custody before that happens."

They sat side by side on the edge of her bed, Irina's good hand making circles over her belly while scanning her surroundings. The cell seemed much smaller to her now, even though its size had not changed, but hers had.

"You should go now, Jack. Get some sleep." She offered him a small smile taking her hand into his.

"Would you think I'm weak if I said I don't want to leave you?" Jack ran his hand over her belly as well, his eyes locking onto hers.

"Only if you think I am, for wanting you to stay." Irina's hand recaptured his positioned just atop her stomach, feeling the baby kick in her cramped space. Her eyes started to tear up and she had to blink them back. "God, I am such an emotional wreck when I am pregnant." She laughed nervously. "I really am getting weak."

"You're not weak…" Jack reached up and touched her face gently, wanting so badly to kiss her but remembering they had a constant audience, "In fact, I don't think I've ever seen you stronger. Get some sleep."

Irina nodded, afraid that speaking would only bring on more tears. Jack ran his hand softly over the curve of her belly, and kissed Irina on the side of the temple. Walking away from her, down the dark hall as they turned the lights out for the night, was worse then any torture he'd ever been through.

* * *

_**AN: If you're reading and enjoying the story, I would really love and appreciate your reviews! Thank you :)**_


	18. Chapter 18

**_AN: Many many many thanks to those of you who are taking the time to review! I love hearing your thoughts as you read the chapters. _**

**Music for this chapter (on repeat): _Into Your Heart _by Sarai Givaty_, Boot Were Made for Walkin' _by Nancy Sinatra_, Linger _by The Cranberries_, Where Are We Runnin? _by Lenny Kravitz_, Mother, We Just Can't Get Enough _by New Radicals_, Only Time _by Enya**

* * *

EIGHTEEN

o

Sydney arrived early to work the next day after having not slept at all the night before. The idea of her mother in CIA custody, and the uncertainty of it all, very unsettling, keeping her awake for most of the night.

"Dad." She was surprised to find him there as well, but then noticed the dark circles under his eyes and realized he probably wasn't sleeping either. "Have you spoken with Devlin about getting Mom released?" She asked setting the bag of food for her breakfast with her mother down temporarily on the desk.

"I was just about to make the call. He's been in a meeting since 8 a.m." Jack rifled through some files, glancing up every so often to the monitor giving live feed into Irina's cell. Irina was seen sitting on her bed, reading the Bible that was left for her.

"Have you seen Mom yet this morning?" She picked up the bag, glancing back and forth between her father and the screen.

"Yes, she's expecting you." He gave her a short smile and then returned to his paper work.

Irina had heard the clanking of the gates signaling her arriving visitor and put the book aside, greeting her daughter with a big smile.

"Sydney," Irina struggled slightly to stand.

"Mom, stay there." Sydney waved her down through the glass as she waited for the guard to open the cell door and give her entrance.

Irina complied, too comfortable to move at this point. Sydney sat beside her on the bed.

"I brought you something." Sydney smiled reaching into the bag.

"Something more than breakfast? You're spoiling me." Irina smiled and watched intrigued as Sydney pulled out a black gel filled ball, and a tennis ball.

"So you can keep up with your physical therapy." Sydney smiled handing her mother the objects.

"Sydney," Irina looked surprised at the thoughtfulness of her daughter, "Thank you."

"How'd you sleep?" She asked pulling out two Styrofoam containers and two bottles of juice.

"About as well as you." Irina smiled reaching up to trace the dark line under Sydney's eye. "Ah, I can't wait until I can drink coffee again." Irina twisted the top off the orange juice bottle. "I would kill for some coffee right now."

Sydney stopped her movements and glanced up in response.

"Sydney, I'm not serious." Irina laughed. "Just a little prison humor. "

"Sorry, I am just so, irritated by all this." Sydney fumbled through the bag once more, retrieving two plastic forks, handing one to her mother.

"It's ok." Irina folded one leg under the other, understanding her daughter's frustrations. She placed her container on her belly and used it as a table. "Sorry, I don't have a table to offer you." She gave Sydney another sarcastic smile looking around the empty cell.

"I know, I'm sorry it's so bare. I'll see if I can't get them to bring in a table and some chairs." Sydney tucked her hair behind her ear, glancing over at the Bible still lying on the bed. "Maybe some new books too. I'm sure you don't want to keep reading this." She ran her hand over it, while stabbing scrambled eggs with the other.

"I don't mind reading the Bible. I like it actually." Irina smiled catching Sydney off guard with the comment. "It's a little different, this one, than the Russian Orthodox one I grew up with but…the teachings and principles are all the same."

"I didn't know you were religious?" Sydney's stunned expression continued though she kept eating.

"Sydney, you don't remember going to church with me when you were little?" Irina's eyebrows creased in wonder.

"Well yeah, of course." Sydney looked away nervously, "but I just assumed after I found out that…"

"I was a KGB agent that it was all a lie, too?" Irina finished her daughter's thought.

_***Into Your Heart***_

"Yes." Sydney swallowed hard and focused on her eggs.

"It wasn't a lie, Sydney. I do have a strong spiritual belief. My faith is what got me through," It was Irina's turn to focus on the eggs, "a lot of difficult times in my life. I'll admit I've lost it at times over the years, my faith, but it's always there, even when I wanted to believe I no longer did."

Irina didn't have to finish the previous thought. Sydney had known without words what her mother was referring to when she'd said 'difficult times.'

"What about you?" Irina finally looked up.

"Well, I'm not a regular church-goer, I don't think I have been since 'your' funeral really," Her eyes met with Irina's sadly, "And being religious or spiritual is never easy to do when you're in this business."

"Yes." Irina agreed softly knowing just how hard it was to believe, and keep the faith after what they'd all seen, what they'd done.

"But, I do believe in a higher spiritual being. It's always been a comfort factor for me, like all the years I believed you were dead. The thought of you in Heaven with the angels, always made me feel better knowing one day, there was a place, we would see each other again." She gave Irina a sheepish smile.

"That is beautiful, Sydney," Irina felt herself tearing up, and set her breakfast aside, "But I can also see now why you'd lose faith after finding out about me. I'm so sorry." She blinked back the tears, "The thought of me going to a place like Heaven must seem so absurd to you now; it does to me."

"No, Mom." Sydney set her breakfast aside, "It's not so absurd to me anymore, the more I learn about you, the more I realize you've done some truly wonderful things for people, too. You've taken lives but you've also saved them. That has to count for something." She reached over and placed her hand on her mother's that was now resting on her belly.

Irina reached forth and cupped Sydney's chin turning her daughter's eyes to hers, "Thank you for having faith in me, Sydney." She smiled and a tear fell to her cheek, "You continue to be one of the main reasons I still believe, I still have faith after all this life has brought me because you are living proof that miracles do exist. You were born into one of the most harried of circumstances, you were my true little angel." Irina admitted slowly, "Losing you, I lost my faith but finding you again, your father, your sister is another miracle and I'm learning to have faith again." Irina looked up quickly and smiled seeing Jack standing on the other side of the glass.

"I don't mean to interrupt," Jack signaled for the guard to open the cell door and let him in, "Irina, I need to know about the other nine CIA agents you are accused of murdering." He paused, "You admitted to Sophia that they were your fellow agents, KGB agents on missions inside the CIA."

Irina looked away.

"Irina," Jack went to kneel in front of her, taking her hand in his. "I know you want to protect their identities but Devlin and the Senate Hearing Committee are going to want proof that these agents were indeed KGB and not CIA if we're going to get you pardoned." His thumb caressed the back of her hand trying to comfort her and reassure himself that this would work. "We already know about Mikhail…Christopher Wezchkov alias Agent Craig Wessley, …Dmitri Markovich alias Agent David Markson…and Agent Peter Markov otherwise known as Agent Paul McCalister." Jack recited the names slowly seeing Irina's eyes flash up to meet his after the mention the Christopher Wezchkov.

"How?" Irina was finding it hard to swallow.

"Agents Wessley and Markson were positively identified through face recognition when Marshall scanned the prisoner's faces from the Kashmir tapes. "

Irina's eyes closed, and a stream of tears started making their way down her cheeks.

"It's also how we positively ID'd Vaughn's father after finding out that three of your supposed victims weren't CIA but KGB. We pulled the files of all the agents you admitted to and were convicted of killing. McCalister was ID'd as Markov." He paused, waiting for her to look at him. "We will ID them all eventually, Irina but with your help, it will go much more quickly and it will speed up your pardoning process."

"Most of them are probably already dead and if they are, I want you to promise me," She finally looked up meeting Jack's eyes, "That you will 'not' tell their American families their true identities. It will cause more pain."

"Promise." Jack met her eyes.

"Ok. I'll help ID them." She wiped the tear streaks off her cheeks as Jack signaled the guards. "But I'll need access to the SVR server to pull their files."

Jack looked hesitant for a moment, thinking about the last time he gave Irina access to Echelon and then shook it off and helped Irina to stand.

"Just the cuffs, no shackles." Jack commanded as the two guards came in to prep Irina. They cuffed her wrists, and guided her by the arm out of the cell, followed by Jack and Sydney.

_***Boots Were Made For Walkin'***_

The entire Operations Center came to a halt with the arrival of the armed guards and a very pregnant Irina Derevko. All eyes were on the woman who'd last used her access of the system to plan her escape and the raid on an NSC facility. And now she was supposedly here, to help them.

Irina was well aware of the critical, intimidated stares she was receiving, but kept her focus on Kendall who was fast approaching.

"I see you've agreed to help ID the agents." Kendall stood in front of her, hands on hips.

Irina held her hands in the air, just as before, waiting for her handcuffs to be removed, with a smile.

Kendall nodded, and the cuffs were taken off. Irina took a seat behind the computer she was going to use to access the KGB files.

"Don't try anything funny. I'm trusting you on this." Kendall leaned over and whispered into her ear, "Jack and Sydney are trusting you on this."

Irina looked over to her husband and daughter and gave them a small, reassuring smile. The same young technician who'd helped her with Echelon sat nervously next to her at Kendall's nod.

Marshall came running moments later. "Sorry, I'm late there was this traffic and then I…" He noticed the armed guards and then Irina sitting at the computer. "Whoa." He stopped in his tracks, feeling the sweat beads forming on his brow already. "Hiiiyah," He stammered and smiled nervously at the woman staring at him.

"Marshall, you remember my mother…" Sydney began,

"Of course," He smiled and wrung his hands in nervousness. "Irina or should I call you, 'Your Highness' or 'Tsarina' or 'Empress' or 'Tsarina Irina'…I find your history all very fascinating and-" He bumbled on nervously under the scrutinizing stares of everyone, including the gorgeous woman he was addressing that only smiled fascinated at him.

"Ms. Derevko, will suffice Marshall," Jack gave him a stern look.

"You can call me Irina." Irina smiled at the nervous young man and threw a stern look of her own at Jack for being so hard on him.

"Ok, Ms. Derevko." He pulled up a chair on the other side of her, deciding he was more intimidated by Jack at the moment. Marshall wiped his sweaty brow and let out a deep breath, causing Irina to chuckle slightly as she undid the Velcro strap holding her injured arm to her body, and began to type feverishly at the keyboard.

Ten minutes later, the office had slowly gone back to work, but most of the eyes still remained on the group huddled around Irina in the center of the room.

"Oh my God, you're in." Marshall looked up in awe. "I mean, I'm a genius at this stuff and it would take me hours to get in. How-"

"I developed the system when I was an undergrad at the Academy." Irina supplied the information without looking up from where she was typing. In truth, she had access to all Russian government files as the behind the scenes leader of the country.

"Wow." Marshall shook his head at her speed and agility cruising through the online server and files. "You're really good. You know it took me weeks to figure out your last code-"

"Mom, do you want something to drink?" Sydney tried steering the conversation away from where it was headed, 'The Kashmir tapes,' protected by Irina's code that was 'so' difficult for Marshall.

"Some water would be nice." She stopped briefly to give her daughter a smile.

"I'll get it." Vaughn said, resuming his earlier duty and disappearing down the hall. He returned moments later, water bottle in hand and gave it to Irina.

"Thank you, Agent Vaughn." She smiled without looking up. "Ok. I'm finished. I put the KGB files of all nine remaining agents onto your hard-drive." She re-fastened the immobilizer and Jack and Marshall helped her to stand. "Thank you." She smiled in appreciation to both.

"Thank you." Jack looked into her eyes, letting her know he understood it wasn't easy giving up information on fellow agents. The guards stepped forward and Irina held her hands out to be cuffed once more.

"I am going to be sending the decoded Rambaldi documents down to you." Kendall handed a folder to Sydney, while speaking to Irina, "See if you can't see something we missed. We'll start going through these KGB files. See if they too are matches."

"They will be." Irina looked fiercely into Kendall's eyes.

* * *

Hours of poring over documents in her cell had made Irina's neck and back start to ache, and her gunshot wound throb from hunching over the documents at the little desk she was provided with. She gathered up a handful of papers and lay down on the bed, relieving some of the stress sitting was causing on her aching back. She set the papers aside and ran her hand over her belly.

"I know you're cramped, baby." Irina spoke softly in Russian to her unborn daughter who'd dropped into the birthing position a little over a week ago. "I can't wait to see you either but please, hold on until we are out of this place. Daddy's working on it, your sister's working on it. Just a little while longer." She closed her eyes and began to hum 'The Russian Lullaby' enjoying a few minutes of relaxation and time concentrating on the happier things in life. The child she wanted, created in love, instead of the one in the Rambaldi prophecy, the 'union child' that Sloane had stolen her eggs for and was going to fertilize in some Petri dish to be impregnated into a surrogate mother.

The sound of the metal clanking gates alerted her once again that she had a visitor and from the sound of the footsteps, multiple visitors. Too tired to move, she remained where she was.

"Mom, are you ok?" Sydney looked at her through the glass, waiting impatiently for the guard to unlock the door, Jack just beside her.

"Yes, Sweetheart, I'm fine. Just tired." Irina swung her legs the best she could over the side of the bed to sit, giving a tired smile.

"I just got off the phone with Devlin." Jack sat beside her, "I am presenting your case to him and then he and I are going to present it to the Senate Hearing Committee."

"You're leaving, now?" Irina ran her hand over the expanse of her belly. "Jack, it could be anytime now."

"I know," He placed his hand over hers residing there, "But I want you out of here as soon as possible. Preferably before the baby arrives. Don't worry," He tucked her hair behind her ear, "I'll be back in time and hopefully, with your pardon."

"And Kendall is sending me on a mission." Sydney added sadly, taking a seat next to her parents.

Irina's facial expression fell in a look of defeat.

"We received Intel on a possible lead to Sloane's whereabouts."

"From where?" Irina's interest was diverted from the topic her husband and daughter were leaving less then four days before her due date.

"Sark." Sydney tucked her hair behind her ear. "He'd mentioned something in his previous debriefings that have resurfaced in the new Intel we've gathered on Sloane in the last 48 hours."

"Julian is here?" Irina's heart pounded in her chest.

"Yes," Jack stated, "He's being held in another cellblock."

"Can I see him?" Irina reached for Jack's hand, a pleading in her eyes.

"Why?" Jack looked at her curiously.

"Jack, he's my cousin. His life in this business is my fault. I was responsible for him."

"Sark made his own choices, Irina. You didn't force him into this life. He could have left at anytime." Jack was getting irritated that she was trying to defend Sark's actions.

"Jack, I am not defending his actions." Irina took hold of his hand, seeing the look in his eye, trying to calm him down.

_***Linger***_

"Julian's mother died when he was five, and he was sent to live in boarding schools in England. He kept getting into trouble because he was brilliant and bored and I…well, I took him in. Took him as my responsibility, with his father's approval. When he was seventeen, he wanted to join my organization. I let him."

"He betrayed you to Sloane! You gave up his location." Jack looked at her incredulously.

"To save your life. To save you from whatever Sloane was going to do!" Irina pleaded. "He does things, irrational things sometimes and yes he disobeyed my orders and went behind my back, but Jack, he's only twenty-three. Too young to give up on now, especially if I am being given a second chance at my age with all I've done."

Jack swallowed hard. Saying 'no' to her was getting harder now.

"Please, I just want to talk to him?"

"I'll see what I can do." Jack grudgingly agreed.

"Thank you." Irina smiled sweetly.

"I have to get going." Sydney stood and leaned over, embracing her mother. She let Irina go and knelt in front of her, placing her hands on either side of her mother's stomach, talking to it. "Listen up, Lena, this is your big sister talking. You have to stay in there until Dad and I can get back ok?" She placed her ear against her mother's belly, receiving a kick to the head. "Owe! I don't know if she just agreed to the terms or if she told me off?" She laughed causing both her mother and Jack to laugh.

"Be careful, Sydney." Irina instructed her daughter, her nervous motherly protectiveness getting the best of her.

Sydney kissed her mother's cheek and father's before leaving them alone to say their goodbyes.

"You heard your sister, young lady," Jack leaned over whispering into Irina's belly, "Please don't give your Mommy any trouble while we're away." He smoothed the wrinkles of Irina's blue prison uniform out as he slid his hand around its expanse. Knowing Irina hated long 'goodbyes' he bent forward and kissed her belly, and then to her surprise, captured her lips and let it linger for just a moment, before getting up to leave.

"Hurry." Irina smiled when he stopped at the door waiting for the guard to let him out.

When the last gate clamored shut, Irina let out a deep sigh. She resumed her document reading, hoping to pass time by distracting her from so many issues running rampant in her mind: Jack obtaining her pardon, Sydney out on a mission, both of them making it back in time for the birth and then talking with Julian.

Sydney had hurried home to pack for the mission and Jack had boarded a plane to Washington, spending the entire flight and night, organizing his case to support releasing Irina.

Much to Irina's disappointment, the remainder of the day and night seemed to crawl by without seeing or hearing anything from Jack or Sydney or anyone for that matter.

* * *

When she woke early the next morning Irina's legs felt cramped and the baby was sitting right on her sciatic nerve, making her feet feel numb. Her shoulder had improved enough that she was able to remove the immobilizing device, making it easier to get up and around. Pacing back and forth across her cell seemed to help her feel more comfortable.

Vaughn, Weiss and Kendall had each come to her with some document over the course of the morning with various questions regarding the files of the KGB operatives, formerly thought to be CIA. Kendall had informed her before they'd left that he approved a five minute visit with Sark and now Irina was back to pacing as she waited for him to arrive.

With the gates clamor and the sound of shackles, she new he had. "Julian." She came to stand in front of the glass wall, offering a small smile of peace; the surprise on his face evident as he stared at her pregnant belly.

"Five minutes." The guard announced backing away from the two.

"Irina, you're looking well…and pregnant." His face shifted from her belly to her eyes. "One can only presume that the child is Jack Bristow's?"

"Yes, the baby is Jack's." Irina confirmed and he nodded his head, his gaze shifting back and forth between her eyes and the belly.

"Sloane said I was a fool to dismiss your relationship with Bristow as nothing but a power play."

Irina looked away and then refocused on the man standing stoically in front of her. "You believed, what I wanted you to believe." Irina answered honestly.

"Yes, and I was played the fool, never believing you'd turn me in to save Bristow." His eyes bore into hers.

"You betrayed my trust, Julian."

Sark's demeanor softened slightly at her use of his first name.

"I trusted you with my life and you betrayed me to my enemy." It was Irina's piercing gaze and soft, yet stern voice that finally made Sark look down, ashamed.

"You'd lost sight of the quest for Rambaldi. Sloane said it would only be a matter of time before you betrayed both of us. So I made a deal with him," He looked Irina in the eye, "And he was right, you did betray me."

"Only after you betrayed my trust, Julian." She shifted her weight on her hips, placing one hand on her belly, the other to support her back.

"You'd lost sight of the purpose, Irina." He countered, looking pointedly at her enlarged belly.

"There are some things more important then the quest for Rambaldi…"

"Like what?"

"Family." Irina took a step closer and Sark's posture took on a defeated pose. "We are family, Julian, you and I." She leaned into the glass. "But Sydney and Jack…this child…they are my family, too. I will not sacrifice them again for anything. Not even for you."

"I have always thought of you as my mother, Irina and though I knew I could never measure up to your real daughter, to Sydney," Sark admitted, "You are the only mother I have every known and I regret terribly breaking your trust in me."

Her eyes began to glisten and Sark was taken back by the sight of Irina on the verge of tears, something he'd never seen in all the years he'd known her.

"I love you, Julian and I will not give up on you." She said quietly as a single tear made its way down her cheek, touching the glass, trying to reach out to him.

"Time's up." The guard announced making his way over to secure Sark and take him back to his cell.

"Thank you, Irina." He smiled briefly feeling himself tear up and not about to show emotion in public, turned from her suddenly and shuffled back to his cell.

Exhausted from so many sleepless nights, Irina intended on taking a brief nap, but fell asleep for the night around 7 p.m.

She awoke to the same numbness in her legs and rolled out of bed, having no idea what time it was but realizing it must be morning as her breakfast had already been delivered. She had been sleeping so soundly she never heard the gates opening, or the guard entering her cell to place her tray on the table. She wasn't at all hungry but feeling restless. The pressure in her back was getting worse and she only hoped she would be able to hold out until Jack and Sydney returned.

Irina had decided to try and calm her body and mind by practicing some yoga and Tai Chi. About an hour into it, she realized that the pain in her back was now moving towards the front and becoming more frequent.

"Oh shit," She cursed in Russian realizing she was most likely in labor, and began pacing, concentrating on counting the steps from her bunk to the wall and breathing.

Jack was in the middle of a Senate Committee Hearing and Vaughn had informed her less then an hour ago that Sydney had landed and her mission was in full swing in Bogota, Colombia.

"Uh, sir…Ms. Derevko has been pacing like that for about two hours," Marshall looked from the monitors to Kendall.

"She paces, it's what she does, Marshall." Kendall kept his eye on Vaughn and Weiss guiding Sydney through the mission on their Coms.

"But, um sir, don't you think someone should check on her, I mean she is pregnant and all." Marshall continued.

"Fine, Marshall!" Kendall boomed, irritated by the man's ramblings while he was busy. "Go check on her!"

"Me? Sir?" Marshall began sweating profusely watching the woman pacing in her cell like a lioness.

"Yes, Marshall. Go!" Kendall ordered, pointing in the direction of the door leading to the cells.

"What's going on?" Sydney asked into her Com as she breezed through the lobby of the hotel in disguise. She'd heard Kendall's yelling coming through Vaughn's communications.

"Kendall just ordered Marshall to go check on your mother." Vaughn watched looked back as the nervous young man disappeared behind the big steel doors.

"Why? Is something wrong?" Sydney ducked into a bathroom, asking rapidly, her heart already pounding from the mission.

"No, nothing's wrong, Mountaineer. Concentrate on your mission." Kendall's voice cut in on the conversation.

Marshall tried to swallow, finding it too difficult, as he had no spit in his mouth watching the gates lift as the guards escorted him down the hall to Irina's cell. "Hi," He waved nervously outside her glass cell. Irina kept pacing, looking over briefly at Marshall and then blowing out a breath she had been holding in during her count. "Are…are you ok?" Marshall watched the woman, fascinated as the speed of her pace quickened.

Irina nodded her head 'yes' blowing out another breath, trying to concentrate and peeling off the blue jacket she was wearing, exposing the black sleeveless tank top that clung to her very pregnant form. A warm gush of liquid suddenly soaked the front of Irina's blue pants and she let out numerous curses in various languages.

"Ahh," Marshall stammered in surprise, "You're leaking…"

"My water broke." Irina breathed out as the last contraction passed.

"Oh no, no, no." Marshall backed away from the glass, "That…that would mean-"

"That I'm in labor." She turned the face the young man.

"Oh nononononononono no! No!" Marshall was on the verge of passing out, "I mean you can't be! Agent Bristow is in Washington and Sydney is in Colombia…You aren't due until tomorrow!" He commanded her.

"Marshall, calm down." Irina instructed him. "Take a deep breath."

Marshall tried to take a deep breath but was still queasy.

"Try bending over and putting your head between your knees."

Marshall followed her instructions, "Ok, ok…" He calmed himself, "I'm feeling better now. Wow! That really works." He whipped his head up with a smile. "Whoa!" He stumbled holding onto the glass for more support. "A little too fast."

"Marshall, you need to tell someone I need to see a doctor." Irina used her calm voice.

_***Where Are We Runnin***_

"Oh yes, yes! You're right!" Marshall started off down the hall, running and yelling back, "I'll get help, don't panic. I'm not panicking." He had to stop and balance himself on still wobbly legs.

"Oh my…she's in…I almost…leaking…now," Marshall burst through the door, obviously distraught.

"What the hell did you just say?" Kendall pushed the younger man into a chair, seeing his distress and on the verge of passing out. "What's leaking?"

"She is!" He pointed to the monitors where Irina had begun to pace again. "She's… she's in labor! And the Bristows aren't here!"

"Oh my God," Vaughn sighed into his Com looking at the footage of Sydney on one monitor and Irina on the other.

"What's going on Vaughn?" Sydney demanded as she finished picking the lock on a safety deposit box.

"Your Mom is in labor."

"What?" She almost dropped the documents in her hand and started scrambling to close the box and get out. "Is my dad back yet?"

"No…he's still in a meeting with the Senate House Committee." Vaughn covered his Com with one hand, "Get Jack on the phone!" He yelled at Weiss.

"Well, is somebody there with her?" Sydney started to scramble up the stairs of the hotel.

"He's in the middle of a closed meeting." Weiss looked at him dumbfounded.

"I don't care! Find a way!" Vaughn yelled back.

"You don't care!" Sydney yelled back only hearing part of his conversation with Weiss.

"No, no, Sydney, I'm talking to Weiss. We're trying to reach your father."

"I need to speak with Jack Bristow immediately, yes, yes, I know he's in a closed session meeting…but it's an emergency." Weiss tried to reason with the person on the other line.

"Have you moved her to medical? Is she with the doctor?"

"No. Not yet." Vaughn sighed, "We just realized she was in labor."

Kendall grabbed the phone from Weiss, "This is Deputy Director Kendall, get Jack Bristow on the phone now! Because…because his wife…Irina Derevko, is in labor...as in having a baby! She's leaking, _God Damnit_!"

"Just realized? What the hell does that mean, Vaughn?" Sydney flew over the edge of the railing, making her way down to her car on the other side.

"She's been pacing in her cell all day. We just assumed it was because she was stressed out about your mission and awaiting the news if Jack got her a pardon."

"I'm sorry to interrupt," a timid little blonde secretary walked into the back of the Senate Committee meeting.

"So how long has she been in labor before someone checked on her?" Sydney jumped into the convertible and slammed the door.

"Agent Bristow," The secretary looked at Jack and all eyes were on him. "You have an important phone call."

"I don't know, Syd." Vaughn sounded kind of panicked.

"Can't this wait?" Senator Douglas was growing impatient.

"Well, get off the phone with me, Vaughn, and take her to medical!" Sydney yelled through the phone.

"I'm afraid it can't." The timid blonde said nervously pushing her glasses up on her nose, "Irina Derevko is in labor."

"I have to make sure you've completed the mission!" Vaughn yelled back nervously, not knowing what to do.

"In labor?" Jack bounced up from his seat. "How far along?"

"Marshall, get down to medical and tell them we have a prisoner in labor. Weiss, get Irina and escort her there." Vaughn directed over his shoulder.

"Yes, sir, in labor. Director Kendall said she was 'leaking,' " She tried unsuccessfully not to smile, "I assume that means her water broke."

"Oh, for crying out loud!" Senator Douglas slammed his hand down on the desk.

"I 'am' done with the mission!" Sydney floored it around slow moving cars. "I'm already on my way to the airport!" She squealed the Ferrari's wheels as she tore up to the curb.

"I'm asking that we postpone these proceedings for a couple of days." Jack's pulse raced through his body.

"Ms. Derevko, I'm going to take you to medical." Weiss directed the guards to move quickly and gently.

"Get down there, Vaughn!" Sydney raced to the plane.

"What about Jack? Sydney?" Irina breathed out through pursed lips, waiting for the guard to snap the cuffs to her wrists.

"You're asking for quite a lot, Bristow!" Senator Douglas boomed.

"Fine! See you at home, Mountaineer!" Vaughn threw the headset down and ran down to the cell.

"It's the birth of my child, Senator." Jack stood, briefcase in hand.

"On their way." Weiss took hold of Irina's arm by the elbow and guided her down the hall.

"The birth of a child with the terrorist in question!" Senator Douglas's obvious distaste for Jack and Irina was showing brightly.

"They'd better hurry." Irina cringed as another contraction started.

"Oh for Christ's sake, Douglas, let the man go!" Director Devlin jumped in on Jack's behalf.

"Jack Bristow is on his way." The secretary informed Kendall.

"What a Goddamn circus!" Kendall threw his headset down as well, making way for the medical corridor.

Irina had changed into a hospital nightgown and gotten settled into her new bed. This cell was set up like a fully functioning hospital room and the doctors and nurses were busy hooking up IVs and heart monitors as she counted through her last contraction, holding onto Weiss's hand. A doctor snapped on a latex glove and started bunching up the sheets.

"Ah, ah, what'chya doing there?" Weiss let go of Irina's hand and pushed his stool backwards.

"I have to check to see how far along she is." The doctor pulled his stool closer to the end of the bed.

"No, no…I can't see that. Jack will kill me." Weiss pulled the dividing curtain closed rapidly and made a beeline for the door.

"Where you going so fast?" He had run into Kendall, Marshall and Vaughn.

"The doctor is checking her progress." When they looked at him with blank un-understanding faces, he made the motion like he was snapping on a latex glove.

"Oh!" They all chimed in together, understanding why he'd left in such a hurry.

The doctor stopped on his way out, "She's dilated to six already and going fast."

"How much time?" Kendall shifted his weight uncomfortably, not liking the idea of anyone giving birth in a prison cell.

"Six hours at the most." The doctor looked at his watch. "You can go back in now." He smiled at Weiss.

"Shit! Jack and Sydney are going to be cutting it close." Kendall waved the doctor on, letting him continue with his tasks.

"What happens if they don't make it?" Weiss asked looking around the three other men.

"Then one of us will have to be in there with her." Vaughn reasoned but made no move towards the cell door. "Why are you all looking at me?"

"Because she knows you the best." Weiss added and the other two shook their head in agreement and agreeing with any logic that got them out of it.

"Fine." Vaughn agreed hesitantly. "Under one condition."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever it is, we agree." Kendall nodded.

"You're all coming in there with me for the next six hours."

"Oh, ah…"

"No buts…you agreed." Vaughn warned them.

"Actually, I have to get back upstairs, but I'll stop down to check in every now and then," Kendall clasped the shoulder of Marshall squeezing it and making him wince. "But you two, stay here with Vaughn."

"Prick!" Weiss whispered under his breath watching Kendall leave. "Volunteers us for this and then leaves."

"Come on guys, it's not going to be so bad." Vaughn tried to reassure them and himself. "It's just a woman, having a baby."

"Not just 'a woman' my friend, 'thee woman,' Irina Derevko! The same woman who could kill anyone of us in seconds if we say the wrong thing, look at her the wrong way…or, or, I don't know…but she scares me and excites me all at once! Is that strange?"

"Beautiful women intimidate me and dangerous, beautiful women terrify me. She reminds me a of preying mantis that lures men in with her beauty, has her way with them and then eats them!" Marshall loosened his tie. "And not just her, I'm afraid if we do something wrong, Agent Bristow will kill us."

"Oh come on you two! Pull it together! Now let's go in there and hope Jack and Sydney defy the laws of speed and gravity." Vaughn straightened his shoulders and marched in like a soldier going into battle.

"Boys," Irina greeted them, intentionally calling them 'boys' instead of 'men' as they were all looking a little cowardly.

The three took turns doing water runs and ice chips, and all about fainted when Irina wouldn't let them leave when she received her epidural…the doctor demanding she have one as to not put too much undo stress on her heart. Once those drugs kicked in, life was a little less stressful. Weiss had located a chessboard and Irina had proceeded to kick all their 'asses.'

Kendall had popped in once every hour to ensure things were going smoothly and update them where Jack and Sydney were. It was during one of his visits during the fifth hour that the doctor had come to a realization.

"We've never delivered a baby here before." The doctor announced to the room.

"You've never delivered a baby!" Irina suddenly felt surrounded by imbeciles.

"No, I've delivered hundreds of babies, just not at this facility," He reassured her and the rest of the group. "What I was getting at was, we aren't prepared for a baby…technically we are, but we have no receiving blankets, no diapers, no clothing, no hats or booties or bottles…all the things normally available in a hospital's maternity ward. Someone has to go get them and I can't afford to let any of my staff go so close to delivery now."

"You heard the man," Kendall looked directly at Weiss, "Go now!"

"What? Me?" Weiss practically fell off the stool. "I don't know anything about babies or their necessities. You go, Mike."

"I'm staying here with Irina, unless-" Vaughn began but was cut off.

"You!" Kendall pointed at Marshall who did fall of his stool. "You had some picture of a baby on your desk last year."

"My nephew but I don't know anything more than Agent Weiss does. My sister lives in Maine and I've only seen him at holidays."

"Oh God! Talk about the 'Three Stooges,' both of you go then!" Kendall stomped his foot impatiently.

"I'll make you a list." Irina sighed irritated, "Somebody, get me a pen." Taking charge of the situation. After a minute of scribbling the basic items to get, she handed the paper to Weiss. "Thank you." She offered a small smile to the young nervous man as another contraction started.

"You'd better hurry, she's at nine and at ten we start pushing." The doctor informed them. The two ran from the room, getting stuck in the door on their way out, as they tried to push past each other.

"This ought to be interesting." Kendall shook his head, watching them disappear. "I'm going to try and reach Jack again, find out where the hell he's at."

About thirty minutes of contractions continued, the length and strength becoming more frequent and stronger.

"How you doing?" Vaughn took hold of Irina's hand, watching the monitors as another contraction started.

_***Mother, We Just Can't Get Enough***_

"I'd be better if I weren't in a prison cell having a baby holding my daughter's boyfriend's hand, instead of my husband's." She breathed out as the contraction passed. "Sorry, I meant no offense. I know you don't want to be here either."

"I understand." Vaughn smiled, "And I'd rather be here than trying to figure out what size diapers to buy."

Irina tried to laugh but the contraction kept going and going, the doctor emerged and proclaimed she had arrived at 10cm. It was time to push.

"But Jack's not here!" Vaughn sounded panicked for a moment.

"Well, I can't hold her in, Agent Vaughn." Irina breathed as the doctor locked her legs into the stirrups.

"Oh boy!" Vaughn started to wobble at the sight and Irina held fast to his hand.

"Oh no you don't!" She pulled his hand closer to her chest, "You aren't going to pass out on me. I need you and consider this practice for my grandchildren."

Vaughn looked at her totally surprised by the thought that 'other's' besides him were thinking of his future with Sydney.

"All right, Irina, on the next contraction I am going to have you push, get ready and _push_!" The doctor commanded.

Irina squeezed down on Vaughn's hand and pushed as hard as she could.

"5, 4, 3, 2, 1…ok, Irina good. You're doing great. Ok get ready and push!"

Jack and Sydney stormed through the doors moments later at two minutes after midnight, having arrived at the airport at the same time.

"What's happening?" Jack asked frantic as he saw Kendall on the phone.

"She's pushing! Get down there!" Kendall had been on the phone with the medical team.

Father and daughter flew down the stairs and through the corridor running into Weiss and Marshall carrying bags and bags of diapers, clothes, toys and about everything else they'd seen and thrown into the cart.

"What the hell?" Jack asked eyeing the bags but didn't have time to ask questions.

"3, 2, 1…Good Irina, good." Vaughn had counted down with the doctor, holding onto Irina's hand with both of his.

"Irina!" Jack gasped as he came around the corner, Sydney on his heels.

"Jack! About damn time!" Irina sighed, relieved, "Sydney…" she smiled seeing her daughter just behind him.

Jack took Vaughn's place and kissed Irina. Vaughn joined Sydney on the other side of the bed where she was holding her mother's other hand.

"Ok Irina one more big push and then we'll see her head ok? Push!" The doctor commanded, "8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2,1…And I can see her head! She's got a ton of hair."

"Oh my God," Weiss and Marshall entered the room dropping the bags, seeing Irina pushing. Followed by Kendall, all dumbstruck at the moment and unable to move by the fact that Irina Derevko was really having a baby right in front of them.

"Ok Irina, another big push and her head will be out, ready…Push! 9, 8, 7…"

"Come on Mom, you're doing great!"

"5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and we have a head! " The doctor exclaimed immediately suctioning the baby's mouth and nose out. "Ok Irina, one more, nice and easy push to get her shoulders out and then she'll be here. Ready…push! Nice and easy now…"

"Come on Mom!" Sydney started jumping up and down excitedly holding onto Irina's hand, watching as her sister was being born.

With a loud shrieking cry, Lena Alix Irina Bristow made her appearance into 'the light.'

"She's a little one," The doctor laid her tiny screaming body on Irina's stomach giving the baby a rub down, "But good strong lungs…listen to the healthy cry." He smiled as Jack kissed Irina's forehead, while Irina was trying to sooth the crying baby.

"Oh, she's so beautiful." Sydney cried, reaching out to touch her sister's tiny hand, flailing about. Her little fingers wrapped around Sydney's pinky finger, holding on for dear life.

_***Only Time ***_

"Do we have a name?" The doctor asked while he continued to look the baby over, handing Jack the scissors to cut the cord.

"Lena." Irina smiled breathlessly, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Well, 'Welcome, Lena." The doctor smiled when the baby let out another thunderous cry, causing everyone to laugh.

"I think I'm going to cry," Weiss hugged the stuffed lion he'd just bought at the store watching the scene in front of him.

"I _am_ crying!" Marshall sobbed hugging himself and Kendall rolled his eyes.

"I'm going to take her to get cleaned up, weigh and measure her and then I'll bring her right back Mom, I promise." The nurse smiled at Jack and Irina, as she took the baby from them. "Dad, you coming?" She turned back towards Jack.

Seeing Jack's hesitation to leave Irina, "I just need a few more minutes to finish up with Irina." The doctor smiled from behind the blue curtain separating him from everyone else.

"It's ok, Jack," Irina urged him, "I'm fine." She nodded in the direction of the nurse.

"Ok," he kissed her quick on lips, not caring that Kendall was standing there observing the whole exchange.

Irina lay back on the bed with a big sigh, using one arm to cover her eyes from the light and onlookers as the tears came flooding forward, the enormity of it all hitting her like a ton of bricks.

Sydney leaned forward and hugged her mother, and Irina wrapped her arm around Sydney to pull her closer, both crying into each other.

"This is by far, the greatest thing I've ever witnessed." Marshall kept sobbing, while another nurse took the bag of clothing and diapers from him.

Kendall continued to 'huff' and 'puff' shifting his weight on his heels in nervousness but on the inside, he was moved by the whole experience as well, never having witnessed a birth before.

Lena's wailing never ceased and only grew louder while the nurse bathed and swaddled her in a new blanket.

"Is she ok?" Irina's concern growing as the nurse, followed by Jack, returned with the baby.

"She's perfect…5lbs. 10 oz. 19 inches long," The nurse smiled placing the baby in Irina's arms, "She's just very hungry."

Before anyone could say anything or offer to leave, Irina had dropped her top and baby had already begun greedily sucking at her breast. Her crying ceasing the instant she latched on.

"Wow…she really was hungry." Sydney laughed marveled by the tiny human that had turned into a ravenous shark.

Irina trailed her finger gently over the baby's cheek, admiring everything about her with a constant smile on her face.

The men in the room, with the exception of Jack, who'd seen this sight twenty-seven years before, stood awestruck. Somewhere between shocked and fascinated by the sight of Irina Derevko breastfeeding a baby, her baby, they just watched being born. This 'picture' scared the hell out of Kendall, and then it hit him as to why: Irina Derevko and Jack Bristow, had never looked more content in all their lives.

"Look," Sydney ran her finger over her sister's soft dark hair, "She has the mo-hawk."

Vaughn glanced in the direction of the baby, but became too distracted by the sight of Irina's enlarged breasts and shook his head away, not wanting to get caught staring at those instead of the baby. Seeing Irina breastfeed was going to take some getting used to.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Marshall tried peering at the baby as far as he dare, all the while holding his own nipples and cringing.

"No." Irina laughed, staring down at the beautiful baby, not really caring who was watching or not. "Except for when they get older…get teeth and then bite like Sydney used too. Then it hurts like hell."

That caused an eruption of laughter from everyone but Sydney, who seemed embarrassed.

"That is such a strange concept for me right now, to think of myself ever being that small." Sydney continued to inspect her sister, who was fast falling asleep.

"I remember." Irina smiled at her.

"So do I." Jack feathered his fingers through the baby's hair, smiling at Sydney. "If you think it's strange for you, how do you think your mother and I feel? Our baby we remember so vividly, standing right here beside us while we have another one."

Irina agreed with her smile. The baby had finished and fallen asleep and Irina moved her slightly to rest over her chest, and began patting her back, waiting for her to burp.

"How do you know how to do that?" Sydney and everyone else watching in fascination the way Irina handled the baby, she was a natural.

"It is like riding a bicycle, Sydney," Irina got the burp she was looking for and smiled, "Once you learn how, you never forget." Irina covered herself and passed the baby onto Jack, whose smile had never been brighter as he sat on the edge of the bed admiring his new daughter.

Lena's arm and legs shot out in her sleep, stretching and then curling back into a ball, her fist resting just near her face like in the sonogram photo.

"She's really beautiful." Weiss moved to get a better look at her face. "I mean, she is 'really' beautiful and I'm not just saying that…you know when some babies are born and they are all smashed looking like these ugly little aliens and people say they're cute when they're not so they don't hurt the parent's feelings." Seeing the horrified/homicidal looks he was receiving, "No, no, no, she's not one of 'those' babies! I mean it! She's really beautiful, I mean with a sister like Syd and you as her mother…she'll undoubtedly be a knockout."

"Thank you Agent Weiss." Irina smiled seeing his nervousness. "For everything."

"Can I hold her?" Sydney asked sheepishly from where she was sitting on the other side of the bed.

"Of course, Sweetheart," Irina ran her fingers over Sydney's cheek, with Jack passing the baby off to Sydney.

"Hello Lena," She whispered kissing her sister's soft head, and felt herself tearing up gazing down at the sweet baby asleep in her arms. "Twenty-three years after I prayed for a baby sister every night, you've finally arrived." Sydney announced and everyone laughed.

Vaughn finally reached over and touched Lena's tiny hand while Sydney held her. "She's so little, like a doll." His eyes were wide in wonderment.

"I hate to break up the party here," The nurse returned, "but Mom here and baby should really get some rest."

"You're right, I'm sorry Mom. You must be exhausted." She carefully handed the baby back to her mother kissing Irina's cheek. "Da svdanya, Lena," She whispered and kissed the baby's head. "Congratulations Mom and Dad." She kissed both of her parents 'goodnight.'

"I'll see you in the morning, Sweetheart." Irina smiled, watching her' daughter, Vaughn, Weiss and Marshall go home for the night.

"Kendall." Jack watched his supervisor curiously.

"Bristow," Kendall walked over and extended his hand, "Congratulations." He offered a small smile, glancing from the baby asleep on Irina's chest to Jack. "Irina," He nodded in a silent acceptance, honestly seeing her in a different light after today, "Congratulations."

"Thank you, Director Kendall." Irina nodded in return.

"I'll have them send in a cot for you," he looked at Jack, "I'll see you in the morning."

They watched him leave and Irina smiled at her equally exhausted husband, who was looking at her with nothing but love and adoration…the same look he had when Sydney was born. Only this time, there were no secrets between them.

"Can I get you anything?" Jack pushed a sweat soaked curl behind Irina's ear.

"No," she smiled contentedly, watching their baby sleep on her chest, the baby's breathing in tune with hers.

"Ok," He kissed her lips, and kissed her again extracting himself off the bed, kissed her again and then the baby, "I am going to change out of this suit and then I'll be back."

Irina's only response was to smile and drop a kiss onto the top of their daughter's head, her hand protectively covering the baby's back as she slept.

"Irina," Jack paused and turned around.

"Yes, Jack?" She asked seeing him just standing there, a very serious look on his face.

"I haven't said 'Thank You,' for blessing me, us, with another beautiful daughter." He walked towards her, "And I wanted to say, how very much I love you." He dropped his head and kissed her slowly.

"Thank you, Jack," Irina smiled through unshed tears, "For not giving up on me." Both realizing that if he had, if he hadn't of gone looking for her today would have been very different. Jack kissed the inside of her palm and headed for the door.

"Jack, there is something you could do for me actually. Please call Katya and tell her the news and that I'm ok. She's going to be frantic knowing that today is my due date and she hasn't heard anything."

"I called her on the flight back to LA, to tell her that you'd gone into labor," He smiled. "I will call her and let her know Lena has arrived and baby and mother are looking beautiful and doing well."

"Thank you."


	19. Chapter 19

**_AN: My many many thanks to those who are reviewing! I can't tell you how much I appreciate the feedback :) mmbrooks- You are amazing! Thank you!_**

**_Music for this Chapter is so good and meaningful for these scenes! I highly recommend getting it on Youtube or Spotify! It's free so why not enjoy as it was written! (on repeat) _****_Make You Feel My Love _by Adele_, Change in the House of Flies _by Deftones_, She Will Be Loved _by Maroon 5_, Angel _by Sarah McLachlan_, Kissing You _by Des'ree from_ Romeo and Juliet Soundtrack, I Will Love You by Fisher_**

* * *

NINETEEN

o

"Oh my God, Eric," Vaughn laughed watching Sydney and Irina put Lena in her very first article of clothing. "What size is that? She's swimming in it!"

"It was cute so I grabbed it. Had those cute little yellow flowers." Weiss watched with fallen expression as Irina rolled the sleeves up on the baby lying on her bed. "It looked pretty small in the store. She's just super small. I'm sorry, man, ok! I did the best I could under pressure!"

"It's very cute, Agent Weiss," Irina smiled up at him when she finished, "I'm sure she'll grow into it." She propped the baby up in her arm as Sydney slid on the little knit hat to keep Lena's head from getting cold.

Weiss seemed to lighten up after Irina gave her approval and threw Vaughn an annoyed look. "At least I got the diaper size right."

"Only because you and Marshall bought every size from Preemie up." Vaughn added under his breath and cracked a smile. "One of them was bound to fit her."

"Oh shut up, Mike!" Weiss threw an oversized diaper at him.

"Ok you two, enough!" Sydney sniped at them, gently taking the baby from her mother and turning to Vaughn, "Open your arms."

"What? Syd? I ah…" He stuttered the closer she came to him with the baby.

"Just open your arms." She smiled calmly.

"Syd, I've never held a baby this tiny." He opened his arms as Sydney gently passed the baby off to him. "Oh." He cooed once the baby was in his arms, "Wow." He smiled down at her and then up at Sydney and Irina, the exchange making Irina smile from ear to ear sitting in her bed.

The morning after the delivery, her medical cell had become the hotspot of the JTTF with Lena's arrival.

"I've got it!" Marshall exclaimed, armed with a digital camera and an enormous smile as he burst through the cell door.

"Thank you, Marshall. Katya will be thrilled to see some photos of Lena." Irina smiled adjusting her pillow. "It was a very thoughtful idea. Where'd your father go to?" Irina looked back towards Sydney while Marshall started snapping pictures of the baby.

"He's talking with Kendall. They're going to move you back to your regular cell and Dad's talking him into letting you keep the baby with you full-time, until he can secure your pardon." The baby started fussing and Vaughn handed her back to Irina to feed. "It only makes sense, since we'd have to be bringing her back down here every two hours for you to feed anyway." Sydney sat on the edge of the bed watching her sister nurse.

"What do you think Kendall's response to that request is going to be?" Irina covered the tiny hand grasping at her breast, the thought of being separated from her baby for more then a minute unbearable right now.

"I don't think he's going to have a problem with it." Sydney laughed thinking about what she'd over heard from the conversation. "Dad explained to him about having to bring her back every two hours to breastfeed anyway and Kendall made some remark about buying Lena formula to which of course Dad lectured him on how important it is for newborns to be breastfed for at least the first two weeks of life to develop healthy immune systems. Of course, he used you breastfeeding me and my excellent health as an example." She smiled holding back her laughter as the men in the room gave them strange semi erotic looks thinking about Sydney being breastfed by Irina.

"Your father explaining the pros and cons of breastfeeding to Director Kendall. Oh, that is one conversation I wish I'd seen." Irina laughed seeing the mental image in her mind.

"I think Dad clenched the deal by giving Kendall an entire box of Cuban cigars and two bottles of vodka to celebrate Lena's birth. I've never seen him like this Mom, Dad so smiley. It's kind of freaking me out."

"What's freaking you out?" Jack appeared in the doorway with a pink box in hand, broad grin plastered on his face.

"You." Sydney laughed with a smile.

"What's the verdict, Jack? Can she stay with me?" Irina asked hopeful as she pulled the baby closer to her bosom.

"She can stay, for now." He smiled, leaning over to kiss the baby's head and then Irina's cheek.

"For now? What does that mean?" She was not as relieved as she should be.

"Meaning that I want to have you both out of here as soon as possible and she can stay with you full-time until I reconvene with the Senate House Committee and get your pardon." He opened the pink box and pulled out the beautiful cake inside. 'Happy Birthday Lena' was written across the top of the cake in English with 'Welcome to the Light' written across the bottom in Cyrillic. In the middle, her birthday and their re-birth, November 15th.

"Jack," Irina smiled feeling herself get teary eyed at his whole hearted effort to accept her Russian heritage and sharing a knowing glance with Sydney and Jack over the significance of the date.

"And," Sydney smiled through her tears and left the room to retrieve something from the hall leaving them all in suspense, "What's a birthday without gifts?" She carried in a beautiful 'Moses cradle basket' into the room.

"Oh, Sydney," Irina adjusted herself and the baby to get a better look, "Thank you." She smiled her eyes filling with tears. "Wherever did you find it?"

"I remembered you telling me about the one Grandma had for you and Katya when you were babies, while we were shopping that day in St. Petersburg." She admitted shyly, tracing the eye-lit white lining of the basket with her finger, "I've been looking for one like you described ever since and I finally found one at The Pottery Barn of all places."

"Oh, Sydney its perfect!" Irina wrapped her arm around Sydney, pulling her as close as possible while still feeding the baby. "Just like you. Thank you, Sweetheart."

Jack motioned to a guard standing on the other side of the glass and the young man entered carrying a box, passing it to Jack before returning to his post of standing outside the cell. Jack opened the box and began passing out a bottle of vodka to everyone present in the room, doctors, nurses and all, save Irina who was still feeding the baby. He twisted off the cap and raise the bottle in salute as did everyone else, "To Lena, may your life be far less complicated then ours."

"To Lena!" Everyone saluted, took a swig of their vodka and dug into their cake.

Marshall kept snapping away with the camera and capturing this momentous day, even if it was in the prison cell.

"Sydney, " Irina asked setting the cake plate aside, returning to the seriousness still surrounding them. "What did you learn about the possible lead on Sloane you were looking for? I know I am in no position to ask these questions as a prisoner, but-"

"He's been doing a great deal of business in northern Africa," Sydney jumped in and answered. "We're looking into a possible contact of his that made a money exchange with him four months ago…Zamir Allyahwa."

Irina's attention was peaked, "Zamir." She repeated thinking to herself.

"You know him?" Jack's tone became more serious seeing the obvious change in Irina.

"He is a former contact of mine, a Saudi-Arabian nationalist." She glanced around the room at the agents whose attention she fully held at the moment. "Freelance worker, with ties to Al-Qaeda."

"Al-Qaeda?" Sydney felt a shiver run through her spine at the thought of her mother and now Sloane working with someone from Al-Qaeda. "What would Sloane want with an Al-Qaeda operative?"

"What do you know?" Jack prompted Irina to tell them what she knew.

"About five months ago, Zamir made contact with one of my Russian operatives about the purchase of a nuclear missile silo in Siberia." She propped a sleeping Lena up on her chest as everyone in the room found it hard to swallow. "It was just after Moscow." She touched her chest and traced the scar hidden beneath her nightgown indicating the night she was shot. "I was obviously in no condition to deal with him at the time, so I had Katya meet with him."

"And did you sell it to him?" Vaughn brave with his anger rising within him at the thought she could have in anyway facilitated Al-Qaeda.

"No, of course not, Agent Vaughn." She stroked the baby's head, "I had Katya tell him Russia was not in the business of helping mass murderers and if he approached us again about the subject, I would have him killed."

A sigh of relief went up around the room.

"Well, that still doesn't help us understand what business he has with Sloane?" Sydney interjected.

"No, but it does provide motive." Jack stood from where he was seated on the bed and began pacing putting the few pieces of information they had together, "Irina basically told Zamir in no uncertain terms to 'go to hell.'"

"Making him open to anything Sloane suggested about extracting revenge on Mom." Sydney nodded, following this line of thinking.

"Yes, but what would Al-Qaeda have that Sloane would want in connection with the Rambaldi prophecy?" Jack turned his attention back to Irina, "You said he was freelance. Sark told us in his debrief that you'd used him on one or two occasions."

"Yes." Irina confirmed tracing the delicate curves of Lena's ear as she slept. "We used him to gather Intel on Hamas inside Tehran on one occasion. Hamas were attempting to buy unshielded uranium from one of my suppliers in Kiev and the other occasion, I used him to negotiate an arms trade between Russia and the Revolutionaries in Afghanistan for fighting the Taliban. Once he aligned himself with Al-Qaeda, I severed all connections with him."

Everyone stood momentarily dumbstruck at yet another reminder that Irina really was the ruling force behind Russia and just how far her organization reached.

"Do you know how to contact him?" Vaughn asked eagerly, knowing that if they caught this man, they'd not only have Intel on Sloane, but also a connection inside Al-Qaeda.

"Yes, I can arrange a meet if you'd like?" Irina nodded.

"I'll pass this onto Kendall. Thank you." Jack swallowed hard, realizing how important this meet could be if it could be arranged.

Three hours later, Irina and Lena had been moved back to her regular cell. Jack had been on the phone with Devlin discussing the Senate Committee Hearing and new Intel Irina had provided them with concerning Sloane and Al-Qaeda, while the rest of the group pursued the possible lead.

"I have to go back to Washington. The Committee is reconvening tomorrow about your mother's case." Jack told Sydney and Kendall after he hung up the phone with Devlin. "The fact that your mother has possible Intel for getting inside Al-Qaeda is another major plus in getting her pardoned."

"Dad, you're leaving so soon," Sydney empathized watching her father pack up his briefcase.

"Sydney, I want them out of that cell as soon as possible." He glanced up to the monitor showing Irina and the baby. "The sooner I get to Washington, the sooner it's over and I can bring them home."

Sydney nodded in understanding, "When's your flight leave?"

"In two hours," He picked up his briefcase, "Kendall, can you get Marshall to take a still frame of that image?" He pointed to the monitor showing Irina asleep on her hard bunk, the baby lying on her chest asleep and Irina's hand protectively covering her back. "I want to bring it with me to the hearing."

"Trying to induce sympathy for Irina?" Kendall asked, picking up the phone to get Marshall.

"Anything to help get her out of there." Jack retorted honestly making his way down to her cell.

_***Make You Feel My Love***_

By the time Jack got there, Irina and baby were already awake. Irina had her lying on the bunk, leaning over her, inspecting everything about her: fingers, toes…

"How are my girls?" Jack smiled stepping around the guard into the cell.

"We're doing pretty well, considering." Irina smiled, holding Lena's tiny foot in her hand and laying a kiss on its sole. "She has your feet."

Jack sat on the other side of the baby and Irina. Taking Lena's little fist into his hand, "And your long fingers." He extended them showing Irina their length and the baby smiled in her sleep. "And the same beautiful smile that her sister inherited from her mother." He smiled at Irina, running his finger through Lena's silky dark hair with one hand and touching Irina's cheek, tracing the contours of her smile with the other.

"I could look at her for hours." Irina ran the back of her fingers across the sleeping baby's face. "I used to do that with Sydney, you know, memorizing every detail about her, committing it to my memory." She smiled sadly, pausing a moment, "Because I knew that one day, I was going to have to leave her and I wanted to make sure I didn't forget anything about her. Every freckle, every wrinkle…" A single tear began rolling off her cheek threatening to fall with her admission.

Jack reached up and brushed the tear away, thinking back to the countless times he found 'Laura' inspecting Sydney in her sleep.

"Jack, if I don't get this pardon. I can't keep Lena in here with me forever."

"You'll get the pardon." He cupped her chin forcing her to look at him, "And Lena is staying right here until you do."

Irina tried to shake off the bad feeling she was having. 'Jack was right, everything would work out eventually.'

"I am leaving tonight, the hearing about your case resumes tomorrow." Jack informed her, "It's almost over now." He offered her a small smile, reaching around the baby to take her hand in his. "This time next week, you'll be a free woman again."

"I can't wait." She looked from him to the baby and up again, "I miss you, Jack." She locked her fingers with his, running her thumb over the back of his hand, still leaning over the baby with her head propped up on her good arm, looking positively seductive even if she wasn't trying to be. "I've missed falling asleep in your arms, waking up in them."

"I miss you, too." He swallowed the lump forming in his throat looking at her beautiful face and then to her enlarged breasts straining against the black fabric of her shirt. "Soon." He leaned over the baby and captured her face in a long sensuous kiss. "Soon." He repeated looking deep into her eyes. He bent over and kissed the baby's head and then captured Irina's lips once more before leaving.

Sydney had brought her mother dinner that evening, filling her in on everything they'd gone over that day while they ate. They also talked about and admired the baby and Irina filled Sydney in on stories from the time when she was a baby and the hilarious things she and Jack did as first time parents.

The following morning the doctor had visited Irina and the baby in her cell, giving them both a follow up check-up. Irina's milk had come in and she was now pumping in between feedings, having Sydney freeze it, to keep the painful pressure in her breasts down, as Lena wasn't eating enough yet to relieve it on her own. The CIA's break-room freezer was quickly filling up with the excess.

"How are you doing?" Sydney asked from behind the glass, stopping by quickly to update her mother and pick up the latest round of milk.

"I'm feeling very much like a cow at the moment, but ok." Irina laughed having just finished pumping again. "I'd forgotten that it was this way with you, too. If memory serves me right, it should take about a week for it to normalize and be in-sync with your sister's eating habits. Any word from your father?"

"Yeah, he just called to say he was heading into the meeting…that he'd call as soon as it was over." Sydney smiled softly, both trying to have hope that it wouldn't be too long until her mother was released.

"Ok." Irina answered softly leaning against the glass.

"Don't worry, Mom," Sydney smiled tucking the hair behind her ear nervously, "Dad will get you out."

* * *

"Senators, as you can see from the information I've provided you with today, I strongly believe that releasing Derevko, would only help our government establish a more secure relationship with the Russian government and help in our global War on Terror. She has shown a tremendous willingness to cooperate and has provided us on more then one occasion, with Intel that has been vital into bringing in and bringing down some of the top terrorist cells in the world. I believe that Derevko is far more useful than dangerous to the US Government and we should honor her pre-existing immunity agreement and grant her the conditional pardon." Jack took his seat after the closing arguments in Irina's case.

"Thank you, Agent Bristow, we will review the information you've provided us with concerning Irina Derevko and reconvene tomorrow to announce our findings." Senator Douglas banged the gavel and everyone got up to leave the room.

"Hell of an argument, Jack." Ben Devlin slapped Jack on the back, "You know you have the full support of the CIA behind you on this. Irina is far more an asset to the intelligence in this country than a threat and they'll come to see that. Have faith." He smiled and packed his own briefcase. "Now let's go get something for dinner and let me buy you a drink to celebrate the birth of your new daughter."

Jack nodded in agreement, "Ok, but I need to call Sydney and give her an update first."

"Dad," Sydney rushed to the phone, "What did they say?" She sat heavily on the chair waiting to hear the news.

"They are reviewing the case and will have a decision tomorrow. Devlin said that given the information provided, backed by the head of the CIA. Your mother should get her pardon." He breathed a sigh of relief, the whole situation taking its toll on all of them. "How is she doing? The baby? She had a follow-up with the doctor this morning, right?"

"Yes, they're both fine and Mom says she's sympathizing with cows at the moment." She chuckled.

"Cows?" Jack shook his head in confusion as he maneuvered his car into the restaurants parking space.

"Her milk came in." Sydney blushed feeling very odd talking about such things with her father.

"Oh... yeah, that I remember." Jack laughed, "She is something of an anomaly if I remember. It was non-stop for almost a week. I remember having to take her in to the doctor because she was in constant tears over it, thinking it would never end, but it did and the massive supply of stored up milk gave me the opportunity to feed you once and awhile with a bottle."

Sydney felt a surge of happiness run through her at the thought of her father feeding her as a baby.

"But all humor aside Sydney, how is she doing?" Jack locked the car and leaned against the door, knowing Irina was fairly good at deflecting her feelings with humor and remembering their earlier conversation.

"She's worried, Dad." Sydney sighed softly, leaning into her desk and rubbing her temple. "She's nervous that the pardon won't go through. She hasn't said it, but I can see it. She's not as hard to read emotionally anymore as she used to be and to be honest, I'm nervous, too. What will we do if they refuse the pardon?"

"We'll deal with it when it happens, figure something else out, but Sydney, we'll get her out. You have to believe that." Jack pulled the collar up on his jacket, feeling the cold November air sending a chill racing down his spine.

* * *

The following day Sydney awoke to a rainy, cloud covered day, not untypical for a Southern California winter. Vaughn had called her the night before, sounding positively miserable with the flu telling her she should stay away as he didn't want to give it to her and subsequently, pass it on to the baby. She'd arrived at the office late after fighting traffic that was moving slower then usual with the rain. Her father had called her on his way to hear the Committee's verdict, and now she raced to find Marshall wanting to pick up the live feed from the hearing.

"Already ahead of you, Syd," Marshall smiled flipping through various stations on the monitors until Senator Douglas could be seen sitting behind a large desk.

Everyone gathered around the monitors, watching the verdict being read.

"After carefully reviewing the case of the _US Government versus Irina Derveko_, the committee feels that despite Derevko's current status within the CIA, she has violated more then one international terrorist law, no matter her reasoning and put the lives of numerous agents and US civilians at risk." Senator Douglas paused taking a shaky breath continued, "She willfully deceived the US government on more then one occasion, whether lying by omission as to protect her countrymen and fellow operatives, or by using her sincerity in turning herself in previously, just to gain access to US government files and locations breaking any immunity agreement she had made."

Jack felt like he was about to be sick, his hands balling into fists.

_***Change In the House of Flies***_

"As such, the committee and I agree that Irina Derevko 'is' a substantial threat to the US government and its people," He paused as armed guards entered the courtroom, "and the previous sentence of death."

"No, no, no!" Sydney started crying hysterically watching the scene unfold in front of her on the monitors. Her gaze shifting back and forth from the monitor of the hearing to the one of her mother feeding her sister, sitting so peacefully, unaware she'd been sentenced to death yet again.

Jack flew out of his chair and the guards surrounded him, "You son-of-a-bitch!"

"By lethal injection shall be carried out in 48 hours. Until that time she will be held at a secure location by the NSC with restricted access." The Senator finished.

"This is a cover up!" Jack yelled, one of the guards holding him back from attacking Douglas. "You're using her to cover up 'your embarrassment,' over the fact those agents weren't CIA but KGB! I know what you're doing!" Jack yelled after him as the Senator was escorted out of the room. "You can't get away with this!"

"What the hell?" Kendall backed up as NSC guards suddenly stormed the Ops floor, simultaneously storming into Irina's cell. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Sir, we are under orders from the Justice Department to secure prisoner Derevko. We will be taking the prisoner to a holding facility to await Execution." A guard held his weapon on the group.

"No!" Sydney lurched forward watching the standoff between her mother and the guards on the monitor. "You can't do this!" The man raised his hand and weapon up to stop Sydney, Weiss stepped in front her.

"Director Kendall, we need you to come with us and remove the child from Derevko." The man commanded after hearing about the standoff with Irina in the cell.

"I'll do it." Sydney choked back tears seeing as there was no stopping them from taking her mother.

"I'm sorry, ma'am, but I am under direct orders from Senator Douglas that you are to have no contact with the prisoner at this time. Director Kendall." He motioned with his gun towards the holding cell area.

"No!" Sydney started crying again, "You can't do this! Kendall?" She looked at him pleading.

"I'm sorry, Sydney, I have no control over this." He put his hand on her shoulder trying to offer some small form of comfort before he headed off in the direction of Irina's cell and another guard stepped in to make sure the rest of the group stayed put.

"Irina," Kendall moved around the guard slowly seeing her backed into a corner holding the baby protectively close.

"What the hell is going on?" She demanded, already having some idea. "I didn't get pardoned, did I?"

"Irina…" He avoided her question, stepping forward, "You have to go with the NSC now and I need you to give me the baby."

"Like hell! " She stepped back further into the corner, "What's going on!" She demanded.

"The committee decided you broke your immunity agreement." He swallowed hard, not wanting to do this, "Irina…your sentence has been re-instated."

"The death sentence..." She breathed out feeling as though she was about to collapse.

"Oh, to hell with this!" Sydney shouted watching the exchange on the monitor she picked up a phone, "Dad!" She cried into the phone when her father answered, "They're taking Mom away! Kendall's in there taking Lena away from her right now!"

"Yes," Kendall sighed looking solemnly into Irina's eyes. "Irina, we'll figure this out." He took another step closer, "But for now, you have to go with them and I need you to give me Lena."

Silent tears started streaming down Irina's face as she looked from the men with the shackles that awaited her, to the baby still asleep against her chest. "Where's Sydney?" She looked up through blurry eyes, her defenses weakening.

"She's under orders to stay away right now." He touched her shoulder, "I promise, I'll give the baby to her immediately."

Irina nodded, and looked back to her baby, kissing her softly on the head as tears dripped into the baby's soft hair, murmuring something softly in Russian to her tiny daughter. Silently, she passed the baby to Kendall and watched as he backed away slowly, his hand protectively covering her back as Lena snuggled into his chest. The guards charging in immediately to secure Irina with the shackles as her worst nightmares were coming true.

"I'm on my way, Sydney." Jack jumped into the car, squealing the tires as he left, his heart pounding in his chest. He threw his cell-phone into the back seat. He had two days to figure out how he was going to get Irina out of this.

Everyone stood motionless as Irina was shuffled down the corridor into the waiting transport van. Her eyes locked onto Kendall, holding the baby, as she was re-shackled to the van and the doors closed.

Kendall returned to the Ops floor as soon as the van transporting Irina was out of sight, comforting the stirring baby by nuzzling his cheek against her head. 'This isn't right.' He thought to himself, feeling the baby's soft hair against his cheek. 'Only two days old and she's losing her mother.'

Sydney rushed forward the minute he stepped onto the Ops floor, taking the baby from him, kissing her head and crying profusely as she held her close. "This wasn't supposed to happen!" She cried, looking up to the monitor of the now empty cell.

* * *

Some hours later, Jack entered the Ops floor immediately searching out Sydney and the baby.

"Dad," Sydney cried walking into his embrace with the baby, who was crying hysterically.

Jack kissed Sydney's head and held them both close, trying to stay strong. "We've got forty-two hours left Sydney. I am not about to let your mother die."

"I can't get Lena to drink from a bottle. We've tried every kind of nipple there is." Sydney held the screaming baby out, giving her to her father with the bottle. "She wants Mom." Sydney looked helplessly at her baby sister.

"Shhh." Jack caressed the baby's back whispering into her ear, taking them both into his office and away from the Ops floor.

"Dad, what are we going to do?" Sydney looked fallen as Jack tried to comfort both his daughters.

"I'm calling Katya." He calmed the baby down and tried again with the bottle. It had been almost six hours since Irina had last nursed her and hunger finally got the best of her and she started eating.

"Katya," Jack patted Lena's back when she finally finished 4 oz. And he had a moment to call, "We have a problem." He looked sadly at Sydney while speaking into the phone.

_***She Will Be Loved***_

Vaughn had been sleeping most of the day, his fever keeping him out of it. Around 7pm, he heard knocking on his door and crawled off the couch to open it. Sydney stood on the stoop, drenched from head to toe by the pounding rain.

"Syd," He looked at her surprised for a moment then pulled her by the arm inside. "What's wrong?" He grabbed a towel from the bathroom and wrapped it around her soaking body.

"You haven't heard?" She shivered, trying to hold back her tears.

"No…what?" Vaughn's concern came flooding forward.

"They've taken my mom," she paused swallowing hard, and then sobbed, "They're going to execute her, Vaughn."

"Oh my God," He pulled her to his chest, wrapping his arms around her. "Syd, I'm so sorry." He held her tight as she cried, trying to make sense of it all himself. "Where'd they take her?" He asked when she finally calmed down a little.

"Some NSC holding facility, here in LA." She sobbed taking the tissue he offered her.

"What about Lena?" He used the corner of the towel to wipe water drops from her face.

"She's with my Dad. Katya's on her way. We're supposed to pick her up at LAX in an hour. I'm supposed to be out buying a car seat for Lena, but I just had to see you first." She started crying all over again.

"Shhh, Syd, it will be ok. Your Dad will figure something out. If anybody can get your Mom out of this, it's your father." He pulled her into another hug hoping that it was true.

_***Angel***_

Irina paced back and forth in her new dark cell. The front of her shirt already soaked from her leaking breasts, painfully swollen and aching for the release of her daughter's nursing.

"Ms. Derevko." A man Irina had never seen approached her glass cell. "I'm Director Lindsey from the NSC."

Irina looked at him briefly but kept her pacing. Lindsey noticed Irina's shirt and swallowed hard hearing that she had just had a baby only two days ago, "I'm sure by now you know why you are here."

"I want to see my lawyer." Irina finally stopped pacing and stood extremely close to the glass separating them.

"I'm afraid you can't. You're being held under the Patriot Act, you have no civil liberties."

Irina's furious eyes stared into his, "Then I want to see Jack Bristow, my husband."

"I'm sorry, but you can't see him either. Justice has denied them any access to you until twenty-four hours before your execution and then it will be restricted."

Lindsey moved away from the glass, Irina's look homicidal. "I'll have a doctor give you a shot to stop that," He pointed vaguely in the direction of her breasts nervously. "Should make you feel more comfortable."

"I don't want a doctor, Director Lindsey! I want my rights!" Irina slammed her hand into the glass, "And it's not to make me more comfortable! It's to make all this more comfortable for you!"

"Suit yourself." He straightened his tie and signaled the guard to open the gate. "But you should prepare yourself Ms. Derevko, make your peace with God. You are a dead woman walking."

When the last gate had locked into place, Irina slid down the glass, finding it hard to breathe. 'This is it.' She sighed, as the tears came.

Jack had been on the phone all night long with Devlin, and other top officials trying to get a stay in execution, or at least be allowed to see Irina. He was rejected on both accounts.

Devlin, to his credit, had been on the phone with the Secretary of Defense for the better part of the night arguing as to why Irina should be kept alive but the Secretary couldn't change what the Senate Committee had decided 'claiming it would undermined the US's entire philosophy on dealing with terrorists.'

"Sydney," Katya threw her arms around her niece the moment she'd spotted them after landing some twelve hours later, causing Sydney to start crying all over again. Katya kissed her head, murmured soothing words to her in Russian and then bent to observe her new niece sleeping peacefully in the car seat at Jack and Sydney's feet. "Oh Jack," She brushed the baby's cheek with her finger, "How could you let this happen?" She stood with an air of defiance. "She trusted you!" Her anger getting the best of her, knowing it wasn't his fault as angry tears fell.

Jack's response was to say nothing.

"How much time do we have?" Katya dried her tears, picking up the baby in her seat and walking with them to the waiting car.

Jack glanced at his watch as they all piled into the car, "Twenty-nine hours and counting."

"That gives us four hours before we get to see Irina." She whipped out her cell-phone, immediately conversing in Russian to someone on the other line as Jack drove them to the house in the pouring rain.

Two hours passed with Katya in one room talking to various people, while Jack and Sydney took turns with the baby in the other. When one wasn't with the baby, the other was on the phone calling in every favor from everyone they knew.

Jack had just finished on the phone ordering them take-out and Sydney had just started feeding Lena again when Katya plopped down into the big arm chair she'd occupied months before.

"I just got off the phone with Vladimir," Katya sighed setting the phone down and rubbing her hand over her eyes. "He said he's been on the phone with your Justice Department for hours getting nowhere. They will neither confirm nor deny they even have Irina in their custody. So he's getting nowhere. He's called for a private, emergency meeting with your President Bush, but has been told that the President will not change his position on what the Senate Committee has already decided." She looked up with tears in her eyes. "We've exhausted every possibility on this. There is nothing left on my end that we can do." She reached up and angrily brushed her tears away.

"There is something." Jack started pacing in front of the fireplace, not willing to give up. "In two hours, we have access to Irina. If I can get her to drink an anti-toxin serum-"

"We can revive her once they've moved her body to the morgue." Sydney added finding some shred of hope in this plan.

"Will that work?" Katya had never heard of such a thing, finding the idea absurd. "What if you can't revive her?" She swallowed hard, thinking about her sister dying.

"It has to work." Jack pulled out his phone making the arrangements.

Katya moved beside her nieces on the couch. "She looks just like Irina," She smiled sadly, brushing her hand lightly over the baby's mo-hawk while Sydney fed her, more tears springing to her eyes as she pulled them both close.

* * *

The four of them, met by Kendall, had arrived at the NSC holding facility in Riverside just after 8 pm: 24 hours until Irina's execution.

"What do you mean we can't see her 'physically?" Jack yelled at Director Lindsey, dangerously close to choking the man, only to be held back by Kendall.

"Direct orders from the Justice Department, Agent Bristow." Lindsey shuffled the papers in his hand nervously. "Seems with your history, they think you'd try to slip her an anti-toxin and revive her later." Jack swallowed hard, his last chance to save Irina slipping by.

"We can't even hug her goodbye?" Sydney tried to hold in a sob that was threatening to escape causing her voice to quiver.

"No physical contact whatsoever was the order." He looked at Sydney holding the baby apologetically, "I'm sorry, really I am."

"You're a god-damn-son-of-a-bitch and you know it!" Kendall got in Lindsey's face as Jack came dangerously close to hitting the man before a guard stepped in.

"You can meet with her separated by glass or not at all?" Lindsay threatened.

Jack swallowed his anger for the time being, not wanting to miss what might very well be his last chance to talk with Irina.

"I swear to God Bristow if you try anything, I have no problem making your children orphans! You have twenty minutes." Lindsey straightened his stature and pushed Jack aside so he could get through the office door, confident and cocky backed by armed guards.

"I would like to go first, if that's ok with you?" Jack looked nervously between Katya and Sydney who was holding a sleeping Lena. They both shook their heads 'yes,' lost in their own thoughts of what they were going to say in their final goodbye to Irina.

Jack turned towards the steel doors, closing his eyes a moment to steel himself for this conversation. He walked, in what seemed like slow motion, down the hall towards Irina's cell.

**_*Kissing You*_**

'This can't be happening. This can't be happening.' The mantra was running through his head.

Irina was sitting in the middle of the floor, back to him, meditating. Jack had a hard time swallowing seeing her dressed now in the traditional Death Row orange jumpsuit.

Irina felt his presence immediately and turned slowly, their eyes locking as she stood and walked towards the glass. Both, not saying a word, but having an entire conversation through their eyes…

"I'm sorry," Jack finally spoke. "I'm so sorry. I won't give up! I can't give up! I'll get a team and we'll break you out if I have to."

"Jack," Irina raised her hand to the glass, "Stop, please." She begged. "It's over…my time is up."

"No!" He slammed his fist angrily into the glass.

"Yes!" She said forcefully, holding back the tears, "Jack…listen to me. You have to be strong. You have to be strong for Sydney and for Lena," She finally broke and the tears started streaming. "Jack, please don't do anything we'll both regret. The girls need you. If you try anything, they'll execute us both and where would that leave them?"

"Irina, I can't give up." He felt himself tearing up.

"Jack, you have to do this. You have to let me go." She regained control of her emotions, trying as hard as she could to compartmentalize.

"No. No." He shook his head in protest to what she was saying, "Listen to yourself! You can't give up!" He slammed his fist against the glass again.

"I'm not giving up," She placed her hand over his angry fist still residing on the other side of the glass. "I'm accepting my fate…and you have to, too."

"No," Jack relaxed his fist to a palm, feeling her heated hand through the glass.

"Please, Jack don't make this harder than it already is." She placed her other palm on the glass and he met it with his. "I need you to take care of our daughters and to finish this with Sloane. Please, promise me that Jack."

"I can't do it alone again, Irina," he sighed defeated, tears rolling down his cheeks. "Look at the mess I made with Sydney."

"Jack…look at me," She ordered when he dropped his head, "Sydney is the most wonderful, beautiful human being I've ever had the pleasure of knowing and that is because of you."

"She raised herself, Irina." He finally admitted out loud, holding back a sob. "I don't want to make the same mistakes with Lena. I don't want her in this life, she needs a mother."

"Yes." She nodded sadly threw her tears, "She does need a mother. Jack, listen to me, I can't ask you to bear this alone and I can't ask Sydney to be more then a sister. It's unfair to both of you but Lena needs a mother."

"What are you suggesting?" He stepped closer to the glass, wanting so badly to hold her in his arms and never let go.

"Jack, with your life, the CIA…Sydney's," Irina choked back another sob, "I think it would be best if Katya took Lena home with her, raised her as her daughter."

"What?" Jack could hardly comprehend what she was saying. "And just give her up?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying." Irina shook her head, blinded by tears, "You'd still be her father. You could see her whenever you wanted, Sydney too. But Jack, she is a tiny baby. She needs a mother full-time and that's not something I can ask of either you or Sydney right now on top of trying to find and stop Sloane. You know I'm right, Jack."

"Yes." He looked into her eyes and sobbed, "Okay." He agreed slowly knowing what she was saying was true. "I don't want to let you go." He sobbed. "I love you."

"I love you, too." She could barely stand it.

"You are my soul-mate, Irina. I will find you. I will always find you." Jack sobered, attempting to hold back his emotions.

"Go." She nodded in the direction of the doors after a few moments of looking deeply into each other's eyes, unable to stand the separation any longer. "Katya next please."

He knew she wanted to tell her about Lena and save Sydney and the baby for last.

When he turned his back, she closed her eyes as silent tears fell, the entire exchange witnessed by Katya, Sydney and all others watching on the monitors…there was no audio, but the emotions in their actions said it all.

"Katya," Jack walked through the big steel door, immediately engulfed in a hug by Sydney seeing his obvious distress. "She'd like to see you next."

Katya walked slowly towards the doors, then turned back and hugged Jack fiercely. When she regained her composure, she took a deep breath and entered through the steel doors.

"Katya." Irina smiled through her tears when she saw her sister, placing her palm against the glass, wanting so badly to have some contact with the ones she loved.

"Irina." Katya slowly raised her hand to her sister's, the tears already flowing.

"I'm so happy that we've had these months to 'find' each other again, little sister." Irina smiled speaking in Russian, rubbing her hand slowly back and forth over her sisters on the other side of the glass. "I'd missed you so."

"Irina," Katya tried to interrupt, finding it all too hard.

"Please, let me finish." Irina wiped the stinging tears from her face. "I love you so, so much and I am so thankful," she sobbed, "That God has brought us back together, if even for a short time. It is a gift. You have been a gift to me, and my family. You brought us back together, Katya. You wouldn't let me give up on them. I know I have no right to ask but I am about to ask you the biggest favor of my life." Irina paused, waiting for Katya's eyes to meet hers. "I've spoken with Jack and he agrees," She started sobbing again, "Katya, will you please do me the honor of raising Lena…as your own."

"No. Rina?" Katya protested startled by the request.

"Katya please. She will never remember me and she needs a mother." Irina begged her, "I know its unfair of me to ask you this, but Jack can't do it alone and I can't ask Sydney to be anything more then her sister. Please?" Her pleading eyes were boring into her sisters.

"Irina," Katya sobbed, "It would be my honor to raise your daughter." She sobbed, "If that is what all of you want."

Irina let out a huge sigh of relief and the tears washed over her, "Thank you."

"Thank you." Katya smiled, and kissed the glass her sister's palm was pressed to. "I promise to be there for both of your girls. I love you so much."

"And I love you."

"She will know you, Irina. I promise you sister. She will know you." Katya tried to smile as she kissed the glass one last time and walked away.

Jack was waiting for her when she stepped out from behind the doors, having an idea of what her emotional state would be watching the interaction on the monitor as well. He opened his arms and she collapsed into them, sobbing and repeating in Russian, "I don't want to let her go, Jack…I don't want to let her go."

Kendall stood behind Sydney as she held the baby, pulling her to his side, attempting to comfort her as she watched the emotional scene between her father and her aunt knowing she was up next.

"Dad," Sydney's eyes met her fathers with unshed tears.

"It's ok, Sydney." He pulled both of his girls to him and kissed them. "I'll give you some time alone and then I'll come to say our final goodbye together, ok?"

Sydney, afraid to speak nodded and made way for the door with Lena.

Irina was leaning against the glass and when she saw her girls, she couldn't contain the tears she swore moments ago she wouldn't cry. 'She'd pull it together and be strong for them,' but seeing them for the final time… "Sydney," she moved closer to the glass if that was possible.

"Mom," Sydney cried immediately placing her hand against the glass for some type of contact. "Oh Mom... what are we going to do?" She sobbed.

"Sydney, listen to me," She looked down at the sleeping baby in her daughter's arms and could feel her body ache for her, it's instinctual reaction to lactate kicking in. "Sweetheart, there are no words. I have so much I wanted to say but all that really matters is that you know, how very much I love you." Irina's tears would not be stopped. "I've done so much wrong in my life but you, and your sister are the best things I've ever done. I never deserved to have a daughter like you-"

"Mom-" Sydney tried to interrupt but Irina kept going.

"Sydney, it's true. You and Lena, are the greatest joys in my life. I missed so much time with you but I am so 'Thankful' to have been given the chance to know the woman you've become. I'm only saddened by the thought that I will never have the chance to know your sister, like I know you. But," She sobbed, her heart breaking and shattering into millions of pieces as she watched Sydney breaking down on the other side of the glass, wanting so badly to hold them tight against her chest "I'm sure she will be every bit as wonderful as her big sister." She smiled through the tears.

"I'll take care of her, Mom, I promise." Sydney looked from her sleeping sister, blissfully unaware what was happening to her mother.

"Sweetheart, I've spoken with your father and Katya…and we agreed that the best thing for Lena…is to go home with Katya." Irina spoke slowly and softly knowing Sydney would not like what she was hearing.

"What?" Sydney pulled the baby tighter to her chest, "Mom, I can-"

"Sydney, sweetheart, listen, please," She begged her daughter, "Your father can't do this alone and I can't expect you to be anything more then a sister to Lena. She needs a mother, a full-time mother. Sydney, you should understand more then anyone how important that is-" Irina cried for her daughters.

"I do but, Mom, I can help Dad! I can quit the CIA and stay at home with her. I can do it!" She stood defiantly against the glass. "I can't let her go, Mom! She is my connection to you." She finally admitted. "If I have to let you go, I can't let her go, too." She sobbed.

"Sweetheart, please understand what you're saying. Do you honestly think you can raise her as your daughter? To be her mother in every way? This is a huge responsibility, Sydney, and I can't ask you do this. " Irina didn't want to separate her daughters, but she also didn't want to put unnecessary strain into their relationship. "Sweetheart, you can still be her sister if she goes with Katya-"

"And grow up on the other side of the world? Mom, I'd miss everything. No, Mom, no!" Sydney shook her head, "I know what an amazing responsibility this is but I'm ready. I can do it." She cried softly. "I don't want to do it, because it should be you, but I will do it, and I will love her with everything I've got, Mom, I promise. Please, let me do this! We have to stay together." She moved Lena to lie against her chest and buried her cheek into her soft hair.

Irina watched how easily Sydney moved with Lena now, after only two days and knew in her heart, that it would be 'ok.' They would be ok. And she nodded her approval.

**_*I Will Love You*_**

"Thank you." Sydney sighed in relief and anguish. "I love you so much, this isn't fair!" Sydney sobbed, wiping the tears from her face, keeping them from dripping onto her sister. "I just got you back."

"I know," Irina empathized, "Sydney, finding you again, your father, was more then I could ever have hoped for and your sister, is a miracle. I love you all and wherever I end up, I have to believe that one day, we 'will' see each other again, Sweetheart. No matter where I've been in this world, or will be in the next, you've always been with me…always. And you always will." She laid her forehead against the glass and Sydney did the same, palm to palm, forehead to forehead. "I love you to the moon and back, more than stars in the Heavens and the grains of sand on Earth, forever and always." She whispered into the glass.

What was left of Jack's heart, shattered when he walked in and saw them standing like that, remembering just a few short months ago their happy reunion in St. Petersburg and now, they were saying 'goodbye.' He walked up behind Sydney, placing his arms around her, so his hand covered hers, meeting with Irina's on the other side of the glass, leaning his head into Sydney's. They remained that way, for a moment before Irina pulled her head back and took a long glance at her family on the other side and smiled.

"Jack, Sydney's asked to keep Lena with you two and I've given my blessing." She smiled, removing one hand from the glass long enough to wipe the tears. "She's right, you need to stick together."

Jack agreed, and pulled Sydney's head in to kiss it.

Sydney turned the baby in her arms, uncurling Lena's tight little fisted hand and placed her open tiny palm against the glass, covering it with her own looking sadly, and bravely, into Irina's eyes.

Irina moved her hand slowly to the glass, seeing the tiny hand pressed flat against it covered by Sydney's and then Sydney's by Jack's she pressed her palm to theirs, looking up into their glistening eyes with her own.

"This is just wrong." Kendall felt his eyes tearing up watching the exchange. "This isn't right. God damnit!" He said under his breath, as the first tear finally spilled over onto his cheek, where he angrily wiped it away before another fell.

"Til my body is dust, Til my soul is no more, I will love you, love you, " Irina began reciting the lyrics from one of her favorite poems in Russian, "Til the sun starts to cry, And the moon turns to rust, I will love you, love you…" She smiled as she finished and the guard interrupted.

"Time's up." He moved sadly into the hallway with them.

Irina removed her hand, kissed her palm and placed it back over the glass where here family's hands remained, letting it linger a moment before dropping it and taking a step back nodding bravely in acceptance.

"We'll be there tomorrow, Mom." Sydney called back through tears as they were being escorted away, "You won't be alone."

Irina stayed at the glass long after they'd disappeared. Finally, when the lights went out, she lay in her bunk and cried herself to sleep.


	20. Chapter 20

_**AN: **_**Music for this Chapter (on repeat): _If God Will Send His Angels _by U2 from the City of Angels Soundtrack_, There Goes My Hero_ by Foo Fighters,_ Do Your Thing_ by the Basement Jaxx,_ Nara_ by E.S. Posthumus,_ I Grieve_ by Peter Gabriel,_ Deliver Me_ by Sarah Brightman,_ Thin Red Line_ by Hans Zimmer from The Thin Red Line Soundtrack,_ Space_ Between by Dave Matthews Band,_ Hallelujah_ by Jeff Buckley**

* * *

TWENTY

o

_***If God Will Send His Angels***_

The car ride home had been absolutely silent except for the few fussy noises Lena made sitting in the back with Sydney, reminding them life will go on. Pulling into the driveway, they sat in the car, staring at the house not wanting to go in.

"This can't be happening." Sydney broke the silence. "It just can't be happening."

"Sydney," Jack began with a lump in his throat.

"No, Dad! This is ridiculous. We have to do something." She got out of the car, removed the car seat and made way for the house with Jack and Katya immediately following.

"Sydney," Jack caught up to her, pulling gently on her arm to stop. "I promised your mother we wouldn't do anything that would get us killed or thrown in prison with her. " He spoke softly, "Sydney," He moved to hug her and she stepped away from him, the sadness inside her turning to anger.

Sydney opened the door quickly and stepped inside. Setting Lena in her carrier on the table, she immediately started grabbing frozen bags of breast milk from the freezer and stuffed them inside the diaper bag along with some clean bottles. She picked up the baby in her carrier and like lightning flew past Jack and Katya into her father's room. There she began gathering some more diapers, clothing, blankets and the Baby Bjorn snuggly that Carrie had given Irina as a baby gift.

"I'm going to Vaughn's. I just need some space for awhile and then I'll be back, ok?" In one swift move she turned to hug her aunt and then kissed her father's cheek. "I'll take Lena with me and let you get some sleep tonight since you stayed up with her most of last night." Before either could protest she was out the door.

"She's up to something." Jack watched as Sydney strode with purpose in her step towards her car.

"She's upset, Jack, understandably so. Give her time." Katya put her hand on Jack's shoulder.

"I refuse to sit by and do nothing." Sydney whispered to her sister, strapping the car seat into its base in her car. "It's you and me now, Lena. It's up to us to save Mom." She bent forward placing a light kiss on her sister's head before shutting the door and driving away.

"Hello," Vaughn answered in a sleepy voice.

"Hey," Sydney maneuvered the car across two lanes of the freeway, calling Vaughn the moment she was able to in the car. "It's me."

"Syd, my God. I've been so worried." Vaughn sat straight up in bed, fully alert now. "I've been trying to get a hold of you for hours."

"We were at the NSC facility." Sydney held back tears trying to stay focused.

"Syd," Vaughn's voice deflated knowing that she was there to say her goodbyes to Irina, his heart breaking for her.

"Listen Vaughn," Sydney interrupted him, "I know it's late, but can you meet me in thirty minutes at LAX?"

"Syd, why? What's going on? Where are you going?" Vaughn started putting on his pants, knowing he'd be there no matter what her answer was.

"Just, trust me, please? Gate 47B." She hung up the phone and threw it into the passenger seat. "I thought maybe we could use some back up." She looked in the rearview mirror, talking to her sister reflected in the mirror bouncing her image back to Sydney.

Sydney waited anxiously outside the gate as the plane was boarding.

"Syd," Vaughn rushed towards her carrying a duffel bag. "What's going on and why are we at LAX?" He picked up Lena's carrier and diaper bag as they boarded the plane.

"We're going to Washington and I couldn't use the agency plane without my dad finding out so we're flying commercially." She whispered and then handed the woman their tickets. "We'll be landing in Dulles in 5 hours. I'll explain when we get there."

"Is this legal?" Vaughn asked securing the car seat containing Lena in the seat between he and Sydney.

"Is what legal?" Sydney asked stuffing their bags into the overhead compartment and Lena's diaper bag under the seat.

"Flying on an airplane with a baby," He looked at his watch seeing it was just past mid-night. "Just minutes over five days old?"

"I think so, though it might not be done often in normal society." She took the window seat and Vaughn the aisle. "We've never done anything according to normal society so why start now, right?" She smiled trying to ease the butterflies in her stomach.

The plane started making its way down the runway and Vaughn handed Sydney a piece of gum for her ears.

"Thanks." She smiled brightly at the man beside her whom, had no idea what he had just volunteered for but was there none-the-less because she asked him to. "Oh my God, what about Lena's ears?" Sydney suddenly looked panicked at her sister still sleeping in the car seat between them. "Do baby's ears naturally pop?"

"I don't know." Vaughn looked stupefied around the plane hoping there were other parents onboard to see what they were doing, there were none.

"She needs to suck on something. Didn't Weiss and Marshall buy her a pacifier?" He reached under the seat for the diaper bag, digging furiously through it.

"Yes, multiple in many sizes, colors and shapes." Sydney laughed, "I know I put one in there."

"Ah ha!" Vaughn pulled the little white and pink Nuk out from the bottom of the bag triumphantly. He gave it to the baby who started sucking on it furiously without waking up. Vaughn ran his hand softly over her head and pulled her blanket up around her.

Sydney was watching the whole time, feeling her heart soar. "You're going to make a great father." She announced when he was done fussing over the baby.

"Thanks." He smiled remembering Irina's comments about grandchildren and then his smile fell, remembering why they were on this plane. "So are you going to tell me this plan now?" He sat back motioning the flight attendant for a drink.

"No, I think it's better if I tell you once we're on the ground." She looked out the window to the Los Angeles skyline quickly disappearing.

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to cause a scene on the plane."

* * *

"Sydney! Are you crazy?" Vaughn whispered once they'd landed and were now standing a few hundred yards away from the White House.

Sydney was dressed completely in black from head to toe and had just finished strapping Lena into the Baby Bjorn that was securely fastened to the front of her chest. She pulled out the pacifier once again and waited for Lena to take it before answering Vaughn.

"No, I'm not crazy, Vaughn." She began zipping up her coat around the baby, leaving a crack at the neck so Lena could breath. "I'm desperate."

"Sydney, stop and think about this. You have a baby strapped to your chest and your planning on breaking and entering into the White House for Christ-sake! That's insane!" He shouted though kept putting his gear in his bag and pulling on his black attire. "Think of how dangerous this is. For you, for the baby!" He grabbed her arm as she began opening the secret entrance into one of the underground tunnels into the White House used mostly by Secret Service in case of Emergency.

"Vaughn, if I don't go in there and try my mother's going to die." She turned towards him tears in her eyes. "I grew up without my mother. You grew up without your father. You know how that feels and I'm quite certain that if we don't find someway to stop my mother's Execution, Lena will grow up without my father as well! Because I don't think he can handle losing my mother again, it almost killed him the last time! I will not let my sister grow up without our mother or our father. This is our one and only chance; our one shot to change my sister's future forever." She pulled her arm away from his grasp, tears stinging her cheeks in the cold November air.

"Ok." Vaughn agreed softly and helped her to pull the door back.

_***There Goes My Hero***_

Vaughn flipped on his night vision goggles and signaled Sydney to follow behind him. They crept silently down the long entrance that took them underground beneath the park and street and straight into the sublevels of the White House.

"The door's protected by a civil alarm system." Vaughn set his gun down and pulled out his wire cutters. "If we can re-route the wires without breaking the circuit, the alarm shouldn't go off."

"Here." Sydney reached into the pack and pulled out various colors of wires to Vaughn's surprise. "I came prepared for this. Embassies are all wired like this, too." She smiled as he took a red one and went to work.

"Got it." He wiped the sweat form his brow, motioning for Sydney to be silent as he opened the door and did a quick security sweep.

A guard just inside the entrance was dosing lightly in a chair and Vaughn shot him in the neck with a tranquilizer dart before he even stirred. They crept down another hallway that stopped with a big steel door leading them into the kitchen.

"How many guards?" Sydney asked as Vaughn threaded a scope under the door to look around.

"Two on the right, three on the left." He whispered, pulling the scope back and standing.

"I'll take the ones on the left, you take the ones on the right." Sydney commanded, loading her tranquilizer gun.

"No Syd. I'll take the ones on the left; you take the ones on the right. There are more on the left and you have the baby strapped to the front of you remember?" Vaughn argued.

"True, but I have a quicker shot then you." She smiled while peeking inside her jacket to make sure Lena was still sleeping against her chest. "We need to make this silent. I've got the left, ready? On the count of three…1, 2, 3!"

_***Do Your Thing ***_

Sydney burst open the door and she and Vaughn fired back-to-back at all agents, rendering them useless before they could even draw their weapons.

"We're committing at least a dozen felonies, you know?" Vaughn crept silently towards the guards, removing their weapons and throwing them down the trash chute while he and Sydney passed it.

They made their way up to the second story through a server's staircase, shooting another tranq. dart into the armed guard at the top, propping him up nicely in his chair to make it look as though he were just sleeping before removing his weapon and creeping through down the dark hallway.

Two armed guards rounded a corner on their nightly patrol and Sydney pulled Vaughn into a room nearby.

"This is so insane!" He whispered after the guards had passed and they shot them in the backs. "We can't just waltz right into the President's bedroom! There are at least two guards posted just outside the door." Vaughn loaded another tranq. clip into his gun. "So how do we get in without tipping off security?"

"We use the balcony." She made her way towards the French doors in the bedroom they were currently hiding in.

Vaughn moved first and Sydney followed as they crept through the shadows, towards the President's bedroom balcony located just above the Oval Office. Vaughn stopped her and motioned to the two guards posted outside the doors.

Silently, they decided which one each was going to take and aimed. Knocking both unconscious simultaneously.

Sydney turned the handle doors slowly, trying to muffle any noise with her glove while Vaughn kept an eye out for snipers.

Stepping inside the giant room, she quietly pulled Vaughn in behind her and shut the door. The President and First Lady were sleeping soundly in their bed and Sydney motioned Vaughn to take the right again while she took the left. Sitting supremely gingerly on the bed, Sydney reached over to the nightstand and turned on the light.

The President instantly awakened, as did his wife, and Sydney immediately covered his mouth while Vaughn hers; motioning them not to scream.

Lena chose this time to start making fussy noises and both the President and First Lady's eyes darted to the bulge under Sydney's jacket. When she had assurance from their eyes they wouldn't scream, she let go of the President's mouth and unzipped her jacket exposing the baby.

"Oh my God," Laura whispered, tears already in her eyes.

"Mr. President, First Lady, I'm sorry to drop in like this but you've left me no other choice." Sydney swallowed the massive lump in her throat as she sat on the bed. "Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Sydney Bristow, CIA and this," She unfastened the Baby Bjorn and removed Lena, turning her to face their now captivated audience, "Is my sister Lena. She is five days old and in less then twenty-four hours, our mother is going to be executed by your Administration for crimes she did not commit."

The President immediately knew whom she was referring to by the look on his face.

"George?" Laura turned to him having no idea what was going on and who was being executed and why this desperate crazy girl was in their bedroom at 3 o'clock in the morning with a newborn baby.

"Your mother is Irina Derevko?" The President asked Sydney.

"Yes and I realize you refused to meet with President Putin but I feel you're making a grave mistake."

"Putin? George what's going on? Who's Irina Derevko and why is she being executed?" Laura pulled on his pajama sleeve.

"She is a Russian born terrorist, who married a CIA operative in the seventies as a KGB agent to steal information. She mothered a child, killed twelve CIA agents then faked her death only to return to Russia to start the world's largest international crime syndicate, turned herself in twenty years later claiming to want to help only to use her time in custody to obtain information and then escape, stealing US government property before she fled the country. Isn't that the woman in question, Ms. Bristow?" The President's tone very cold and distant.

"Not exactly." Sydney sighed, realizing this might very well take all night. "Yes, all of what you said is true but you've left out some very key informational points, Mr. President."

Lena started fussing as she was hungry and Sydney whipped out a bottle and started feeding her much to the surprise of everyone in the room, including Vaughn as she was making the President of the United States wait for an explanation.

"My mother never killed any CIA officers while she was working for the KGB. You've been misinformed." Sydney ran her hand over her sister's forehead, smoothing out some wild hair. "The officers my mother supposedly killed were all in fact KGB agents, on missions within the CIA."

The President was taken back and leaned against his headboard, the Senate Committee neglected to tell him that.

"My mother's orders were to fake their deaths so that they could be extracted back to Russia. These same twelve agents are the basis for which she is condemned to death tomorrow. Because your Senators are embarrassed by the fact that my mother and those twelve agents were able to fool the US government over thirty years ago."

"Why don't you start from the beginning?" Laura took control of the situation.

Sydney proceeded to tell them Irina's story over the next two hours, all the way up until present.

"My God," Laura's eyes started to tear again for what seemed like the hundredth time that morning after Sydney had finished, reaching over to finger Lena's toes while she slept in Sydney's arms.

"Sydney," The President began as the first light of morning began breaking through the windows, his voice soft. "I must say that I am stunned by what you've told me tonight but you must understand what kind of position this puts me in. Even without killing those agents, your mother's list of crimes against this country is long, beginning with marrying your father to steal information as a member of the KGB."

"Thirty years ago," Sydney interrupted him, "And she loved… loves my father and the fact that she was an agent for the KGB is ridiculous now. You accept and work with Vladimir Putin, a former-KGB operative, known to have worked as a spy inside the US, who is now President of Russia, working with a staff of more then 6, 000 former-KGB operatives, not to mention he 'graduated' from the KGB Academy _with_ my mother!" Sydney rambled on through tears with anger in her voice, feeling the urgency of this situation. "Why are his crimes in a war that happened thirty years ago forgiven by this country but not my mother's?"

_***Nara ***_

"What do you want to me to say?" The President looked up sadly.

"I want to hear that you realize my mother's value to this country…to her country, to my family and that you will grant her the pardon she deserves." Sydney's tears continued to fall.

The President sighed, "Sydney, I fear that nothing I can say will be what you want to hear."

"For years, I have killed myself, literally, with blood, sweat and tears for this country."

"I know, you're one of our best operatives." The President placed his hand over Sydney's.

"But now I feel as though it was all for nothing. To sacrifice so much for a country I no longer believe in." She let it die on her lips. "Tell me where the justice is being served by having my mother killed?" When he could not answer Sydney stood beside the bed. "There is no justice in executing my mother. Not to the United States. Because they will be losing a valuable asset of knowledge for the intelligence community, potentially saving millions of lives. Not for Russia. Who will lose their true leader and benefactor; the one person getting the country back on her feet again, not to mention the same person responsible for the good relations between the US and Russia there are today. Not for my father who will lose the love of his life or my sister and I who will lose our mother!" Sydney's voice rose with every point she was making, alerting the guards outside the door to their presence. They stormed in, guns drawn aiming directly at Sydney and Vaughn. Sydney stood defiantly, wiping back her tears and strapping Lena into the Baby Bjorn again as if she and the President were still the only two people in the room. "So I ask you again, Mr. President…Where is the justice in killing my mother?"

"Drop your weapons! Drop your weapons! On your knees!" The guards shouted repeatedly and Vaughn fell to his knees, as did Sydney with the baby strapped to her chest, arms in the air as tears streamed down her face.

"Enough!" The President shouted, waving his arms for the guards to back off as he got out of bed.

"But sir," The guard began baffled by the President's actions. "These two are not to be harmed or charged with anything is that understood? " The President commanded walking over to his chair and putting on his robe.

"Yes, Mr. President." The guard nodded and shouldered his side arm.

The President walked over in front of Sydney and extended her a hand. "We have two daughters, for you to fly here, go through all this, you must really love your mother and for that, I cannot blame you." He reached up running his fingers through Lena's dark hair. "But Sydney, I am sorry. I cannot grant your request."

Tears immediately came flooding forth from Sydney's eyes and she tried not to start sobbing in front of the President.

"Then I resign as an Officer for the CIA and as a citizen for I no longer believe that this is the country I believed it to be." She choked back her tears and stood taller. "A country of liberty and freedom where ever a person's life counts…matters. Where justice is served. Tonight at 8 pm, our mother is scheduled to die and if you do nothing to stop it you will be directly responsible for her death. Ask yourself if you can live with that knowledge Mr. President; that you are unjustly taking away the life of someone and robbing my sister of the chance of ever knowing her mother? I brought her here so that you could see one of the lives you are currently playing God with." The tears surfaced again as she stood staring the President in the eye.

"Syd, let's go." Vaughn took her by the hand leading her slowly towards the door.

Sydney said nothing the entire flight back to Los Angeles, simply stared out the window of the airplane unless Lena needed to be fed or changed. Her thoughts swimming around the fact that she'd failed her mother.

"Thank you for coming with us." She finally spoke when Vaughn had snapped Lena's seat into the base in the back of Sydney's car.

Vaughn looked at her from across the car and felt his heart breaking. He walked slowly towards her with his arms open and she fell into them, holding him tightly and crying into his neck.

"I failed her, Vaughn." She whispered, pulling back and wiping her tears away angrily.

"You didn't fail her, Syd, the system did." He pulled her head to his chest and kissed her hair.

"Will you come?" She asked quietly, knowing Vaughn knew what she was talking about. "I told her we wouldn't let her be alone." She choked back a sob, getting a headache from all the crying she'd done in the last 48 hours.

"Yes. I'll be there." Vaughn kissed her softly and opened her car door, guiding her in. "Get some sleep, Syd. It's been a long night."

"Sydney," Jack greeted her at the door, taking her bag and the baby's, looking as though he hadn't slept all night either. "Are you ok?" He cupped her face forcing her to look him in the eye. When she didn't respond, he pulled her into his arms, holding her close, kissing the top of her head. "Let's get you two to bed." He picked up Lena's carrier with one hand and held Sydney's with the other.

Sydney changed her clothes and crawled into her father's bed, the baby lying beside her, fast asleep again after her feeding. Sydney, for one moment, jealous of her sister's innocence during this whole situation completely unaware of what was happening around her and the people she loved. But then, Sydney realized how horrible it would be for Lena to never know their mother except through stories and pictures; to have your sister raising you as your mother. She traced the lines of Lena's face softly, easily recognizing her mother's features and wondering if somehow, her sister's birth wasn't God's way of leaving a part of their mother behind for them? Sydney's hand sought out Lena's tiny one and it instantly curled around her finger. She kissed the tiny fist, leaning her head in towards her sister's and with tears in her eyes began the first step in keeping her promise to her mother. She started humming 'the Russian Lullaby' to Lena.

* * *

_***I Grieve***_

_ "Sydney," Her father voice broke her dreams with a gentle shaking of her shoulder. "It's time to go." He offered her his hand and then pulled her into his arms. _

_ "I have to say goodbye to Katya." Sydney slipped on her shoes when she pulled away from her father's embrace. "Where's Lena?" _

_ "With Sophia in the garden." Jack nodded in the direction of the window revealing the beautiful snow covered hedges that surrounded Alexander Palace in the winter. _

_ The sun was shinning brightly and a warm breeze kept the air from being too cold. _

_ Sophia suddenly appeared in view of the window with the baby wrapped in a white fur blanket nestled in the crook of her arm contrasting sharply with the morbid black they were all wearing. Sophia was apparently talking to the baby and began pointing to a group of geese in the sky, who had waited too long to fly south for the winter. _

_ "I brought our bags down already." Jack informed Sydney as he pulled his winter coat on over his suit Jacket. "Dmitri's pulling the car around front."_

_ "Ok Dad." She smiled sadly making her way up the stairs to find her aunt and say goodbye. She couldn't find her in her own room and knew where she would probably be: her mother's room. _

_ "Katya," She tapped on the door stepping inside the massive room. Her aunt was standing by the window, picture frame clutched to her chest, watching the snow start to fall outside. "We're leaving." She spoke softly coming to stand beside her aunt. Katya said nothing but continued to stare out the window. "May I?" Sydney asked indicating the picture. _

_ Katya's gaze held to the window as she passed the frame to Sydney. The frame contained two photos. The first was taken the day of the nap: the photo that had awakened Irina and Sydney from their nap with a bright flash in their eyes, as Katya stood over them with the camera. Irina and Sydney's heads were pressed together, holding hands sleeping, both with smiles on their faces. The second photo had been taken on the day Sydney left Russia to return to the US. She was standing behind her mother who was seated on the bench in the garden, in full bloom then, now covered by snow. Sydney was bent over, hugging her mother from behind, both arms wrapped around her neck. Irina had one hand on Sydney's arm, the other over her pregnant belly. The infectious Derevko smile raging across both faces._

_ "You know," Katya spoke still staring out the window, "I still think that she has just gone away on one of her trips again and that she'll be home soon." A stream of tears started making their way down her cheek, "And then I come in here and look out this window and I am reminded that she 'is' home." _

_ Sydney wrapped her arms around her aunt's shoulders, hugging her from behind as both their gazes fell onto the fresh mound of brown dirt under the massive oak tree near the garden, contrasting so badly with the bright white snow._

_ "I still can't let her go, Sydney." Katya cried, "I want to walk into the kitchen in the morning and see her beautiful smile, or watch her bend into variously strange angles doing yoga in the garden while the summer breeze blows softly through her hair. Or pick up the phone and hear her rant and rave over how much your father drives her nuts at times!" She laughed through the tears, as did Sydney. They stood motionless, watching that mound of brown dirt slowly be covered by the snow. "God, I miss her." She sighed looking at Irina's smiling face in the photo._

_ "Sydney!" She could hear her father calling her, "It's time to go." Sydney kissed her aunt and gave her one final hug goodbye before leaving her alone in the room to mourn in her own way._

_ "Sydney!" She heard her father calling again as she made her way down the steps. "Dad?" She looked around unable to find him but could hear his voice. She walked out the door into the blinding light bouncing off the snow._

"Sydney." He called out again, this time she felt her shoulder shaking, "Sydney." Jack whispered into her ear, "Its time to go, Sweetheart."

"Dad," Her eyes started to flutter open slowly. "What time is it?"

"You've been sleeping since you got home from Vaughn's. It's almost five-thirty and we need to leave here in an hour to make it to Riverside before eight." Jack spoke softly as he pulled on his suit coat. "Vaughn called, he'll meet us at the NSC facility before we go in." Her father attempted to tie his tie in the mirror; shaky nerves make his hands fumble again and again with the knot.

"I was dreaming." Sydney sighed covering her eyes with her arm, wiping the tears away as they fell realizing the nightmare was only just beginning.

"Sydney, could you?" Her father turned to her, his tie hung haphazardly around his neck. She got out of bed and stood behind him looking in the mirror tying his tie for him. When she finished, their eyes met in the mirror, silently sharing in the pain they were both feeling.

"Where's Lena?" Sydney asked picking up her soft blanket off the bed, pulling it to her nose, inhaling the fresh baby scent she left on everything.

"Katya's getting her ready." Jack sat heavily on the bed, intending to put on his shoes, but instead just sat there.

"Dad," Sydney paused at the door, slowly walking back towards him. When she sat beside him, she noticed that he was crying.

"I feel like I'm getting ready for her funeral and she's not even dead yet, Sydney." He sobbed and she pulled him into her arms. "How could this happen?"

"I don't know, Dad." Sydney rocked back and forth with her father, "I don't know."

When both had stopped crying, Jack used his fingers, and brushed her hair behind her ear. "You should get ready."

Sydney stood slowly and made her way for the door.

"Sydney," Jack reached out, taking hold of her hand and rubbing his thumb over the back as Irina always did with him, "Thank you." He gave her a small smile.

She nodded and went to change clothes.

* * *

_***Deliver Me***_

Irina had spent the morning meditating, trying to take herself out of the situation for a few hours but finding it hard as her body was in constant ache for her baby. She tried sleeping to pass the hours but that wasn't helping and now she'd been granted a visitation by a Russian Orthodox priest to read her Last Rites. They'd been praying for the last two hours and Irina had made her peace with God with the priest granting her absolution. The sound of the chains clanking together interrupted her prayer as the guards approached to take her to the Execution Chamber. The priest anointed her with one last blessing and kissed her forehead before she was roughly hauled to her feet by the guards. Waiting for them to finish securing her chains, Irina glanced over to the glass wall separating her from the rest of the world and there she saw it, the combined handprints of her daughters and husband, smudged into the glass.

"Let's go." The guard pulled on her arm, guiding her out of the cell as she kept focus on the handprints until she could no longer see them.

The walk to the chamber seemed like miles as a million thoughts were racing through her mind. She'd escaped death numerous times and every time, she thought could be her last. This time she knew it was permanent. There were no more lives to live, hers' had run out.

The chamber door opened and the first thing Irina saw was not the black table that would hold her to her death, but the faces of those she loved on the other side of the glass keeping their word they wouldn't let her be alone. She found her smile and kept her eyes on them as the guards walked her towards the table and began strapping her down. Jack, Sydney, Lena, Katya, Michael, Dixon, Weiss, Marshall and even Kendall were there to see her to the end.

_***Thin Red Line***_

Sydney kept looking at the red light, waiting for it to start blinking, indicating a 'Stay of Execution.' Hoping somehow that she'd gotten through to the President. At exactly eight o'clock, the table was tipped back and Irina could no longer see her family, just the steel plated ceiling of the Death Chamber and Sydney lost the strong façade she was trying to keep up for her mother.

The tears turning to sobs as the first plunger of toxins emptied into Irina's veins; and then the second minute and second plunger. Still no red light. With the third plunger Irina's bodied started to convulse with the overdose of Potassium, though she fought it her eyes closed and bloody tears left trails in their wake.

Sydney was sobbing uncontrollably and Jack held her tightly with one arm and the baby with the other.

The fourth plunger made Irina's heartbeat skyrocket past 300bpm and blood began stream from her nose. With the fifth plunger her body started jumping wildly for a few seconds and then her heart rate dropped dramatically. They all watched in slow motion as the sixth and final plunger began emptying into Irina, who's heart-rate had already dropped below twenty and her body was no longer moving. They watched in silent horror as the numbers fell for her vitals and the heart monitor went into a beeping frenzy as Irina's heart rate dropped below 10bpm and then the deafening solid tone of her heart finally flat-lining.

Sydney pulled from her father's arms screaming, "No!" Pounding on the glass watching helplessly as the red light finally began flashing simultaneously with Irina's flat-line. It was too late.

The doctors who'd been injecting the lethal dose of toxins immediately flew into action, jamming a long needle filled with Adrenaline into Irina's heart and nothing.

Jack handed the baby to Katya and flew through the doors, pushing past security and getting inside the chamber.

"Get ready and clear!" The doctor's shocked Irina's lifeless body watching as it bounced on the table. "Again!" They alternated bagging her with oxygen and the paddles. The technician cranked the voltage. "Clear!" And again Irina's body bounced from the table.

Jack standing over her head, wiping the blood trails from her eyes, nose and mouth with his shaking fingers. "Come on, Irina!" He whispered.

"Clear!" They shocked her again and nothing.

"Come on, Irina!" Jack screamed the tears streaming down his face.

"Clear!"

Again nothing.

"No…" He sobbed resting his head against her cold cheek. A doctor pulled Jack away.

"Clear!"

Nothing.

"She's gone." One of them said, standing silently by as the sound of the flat-line filled the room.

"No!" Sydney could be heard screaming through the glass and Jack looked up in time to see Vaughn catch her as she was falling.

"Again!" The doctor with the paddles shouted, seeing Sydney. "Clear!" He jolted Irina again, nothing. "Again!" He shouted breaking into a sweat. "Clear!"

Nothing.

"Again!" He shouted. "Clear!"

Nothing.

The doctor grabbed another syringe full of Adrenaline and plunged it into Irina's heart.

"Crank it!" The other doctor looked at the technician in charge of the voltage, lubing up the paddles again.

"But doctor, " the man looked at him horrified. "It's been too long. She'll have too much damage!"

"Again!" He screamed and the man cranked the voltage, "Clear!"

Irina's heart registered a few beats then stopped.

"Again!"

"Clear!" The higher they turned the voltage, the further into the air Irina's body would jump.

Again a few more beats and then it stopped.

"All the way!" He screamed across the room to the tech, "Turn it as high as it will go!"

"Come on, Irina!" Jack pleaded watching her lifeless bleeding body.

"Again! And clear!" The doctor shouted and Irina's body flew violently into the air off the table and Sydney passed out.

"Sydney!" Vaughn screamed laying her gently on the floor.

* * *

"It's done." The man sat back in his leather chair, loosening his tie.

"When?" Sloane walked around the lab, watching as the lab technicians began preparations to fertilize Irina's eggs.

"The Execution was carried out at 8 pm as scheduled. Irina Derevko is dead." The man sighed pouring another glass of whiskey.

"Excellent." Sloane nodded the 'go ahead' to the lab tech who began the fertilization; the procedure projected on a plasma screen TV on the wall so Sloane could see what the tech was seeing in the microscope. "And you're positive Jack had no access to her before hand? I can't afford to find out he slipped her something before hand to revive her later."

"Positive. I restricted his access to her and convinced the Justice Department to back me on it, citing that very example you just gave me. That Bristow is crazy, he'd try anything." The man poured himself another drink with shaky hands. "Which brings me to my next question. What's to stop Bristow from coming after me?"

"He's just lost the love of his life for a second time, Senator, this time leaving behind a newborn. He'll be too busy wallowing in his grief and caring for the child to come after you."

"You didn't see the look in his eyes when I announced the sentence." The Senator looked over the Washington, D.C. skyline; the Capital building illuminated in the background. "If security hadn't been there, I'm quite certain he would have ripped my heart out with his bare hands. I need more assurance."

"I've given you my assurance, Senator Douglas, plus $3 million dollars and a promise to keep your secrets. Don't try to force my hand." Sloane's tone unmistakable as he watched the needle pierce on of Irina's eggs.

* * *

***Space Between***

_ "Sydney," Irina's voice whispered._

_ "Mom?" Sydney reached out for her mother with tears in her eyes._

_ "Sydney, sweetheart, its time to wake up." Irina smiled. _

_ "You're here!" Sydney smiled through her tears. "You're ok!" _

_ "I told you I would always be with you Sweetheart…always." Irina started to move away. _

_ "Mom! Don't go!" Sydney tried desperately to reach her mother but she couldn't move. _

_ "Wake up, Sweetheart." Irina whispered one last time before she was gone._

"Her heart-rate is steady." Sydney heard someone through the fog in her mind and she forced her eyes open. Looking around she was in a hospital room, covered by a blanket, lying in a bed.

"Sydney!" Vaughn was at her side instantly as was her father. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah," She sobbed, remembering her dream and the days events, she closed her eyes again. "What's this?" She picked up her arm and felt the IV attached to her hand.

"You were dehydrated and suffering from exhaustion." Jack sat down softly next her on the bed, holding her hand with sadness in his eyes. "Not surprising with what you've been through the last few days." He reached forward tucking a stray behind her ear.

"How long have I been out?" She wiped the angry tears spilling onto her cheeks.

"About five hours." Vaughn shifted his weight on his feet, exhaustion about ready to take him over.

"And Mom?" Sydney sobbed, looking into her father's eyes with deep sadness, wondering what had become of her mother's body.

"Sydney…Sweetie," Jack felt his own eyes begin to blur, unable to speak, he cupped her face in his hand.

A soft 'whooshing' noise and the steady beats of a monitor alerted Sydney that she was not alone in this room. She turned her head to look at the occupant in the bed next to her and she flew to her feet.

"Mom!" She moved to her mother's side instantly, getting as close as she could without getting in the doctors and nurses way.

_***Hallelujah***_

Irina lay in the hospital bed with a ventilator tube taped to her mouth and electrodes stuck on every major sensory position on her body, tubes were sticking out of her everywhere it seemed to Sydney.

"Oh my God, Dad…is she?" Sydney's voice quivered afraid to ask if her mother was going to make it.

"I don't know, Sydney." He wrapped his arms around her shoulders, resting his head on hers as they watched the doctors continue to monitor Irina.

Katya was sitting in a chair in the far corner of the room feeding Lena and Vaughn came to stand next to Sydney and Jack.

"I don't understand." Sydney whispered, tears in her eyes looking at her mother, wanting so badly to rush to her and hold her hand.

"Her vitals are holding stable for now, but I want to prepare you for the worst. Let's go in the hall." The doctor spoke softly and pulled out her chart, holding the door open. Once in the hall, Sydney saw that everyone who was at the Execution, was now waiting patiently for word on Irina.

Jack wrapped his arm around Sydney who carefully lifted a sleeping Lena from Katya into her arms, needing to feel her sister's comfort, bracing herself for the news.

"In all honesty, she should be dead." The doctor waited until everyone was standing around him before he began his explanation. "I can see no medical reason as to why she's still alive but she is." He paused briefly to look at Irina lying in the bed behind the Intensive Care Unit glass. "The amount of toxins in her system is off the charts, enough to kill her…which is why it's called, 'Lethal Injection." He added sadly. "Now we need to filter those toxins out of her system. Her kidneys can't handle the large amount of Potassium and have started breaking down, which is why she's hooked to the dialysis machine. We also put a shunt into her heart, which has her blood flow directly through a Rapid-Detox machine which is filtering her blood and returning it to her bloodstream, all the while keeping her fluid levels up with the IVs. We usually use it on patients brought in on a drug overdose. She is the first we've ever tried from Lethal Injection." He looked solemnly at them, knowing they were working against the impossible. "Her pancreas has not produced any insulin in the last hour, so we've started giving her supplemental shots, hoping that once her system is filtered, it will return to normal function."

"And if it doesn't?" Sydney asked quietly, whispering still in shock.

"Then she'll have to take insulin for the rest of her life, similar to that of a diabetic."

Sydney nodded, tears making small streams down her cheeks, and leaned back into Jack, brushing her fingers along the curve of Lena's small head and neck.

"Our main concern right now is her liver. It's functioning is very low right now and as one of the body's natural detoxifiers, it's taking a pretty hard hit. We're doing everything in our power to make sure she doesn't lose it. She was also hemorrhaging in her lungs and we managed to get that under control but we'll have to keep an eye on that as well. Her body temperature is slowly climbing back to normal range. She is currently at 96.2 degrees, which is a good sign that her body is fighting back." He offered them a small smile of hope.

"What about brain damage?" Jack was finding it hard to breathe realizing the damage but couldn't help feeling elated over the fact that she was still alive, and her heart was beating again.

"As far we can tell, her brain activity is normal, which is truly remarkable; nothing short of a miracle in my professional opinion. The amount of toxins she incurred should've rendered her brain dead, if not a vegetable. Time will tell us for certain what's going on in there but if she can pull through the rest of this, I have faith she will pull through all the way. For now, it's wait and see."

Sydney let the information sink in a minute and then took notice of her surroundings. They weren't at the CIA approved Naval hospital, but ULCA Medical Center. "What are we doing here, at UCLA?" She turned to her father and then Kendall in surprise.

"UCLA Medical has the best detoxification system in the western half of the United States." Kendall gave her a small smile having thrown protocol out the window the moment that red light began to flash during the execution.

Sydney offered her silent thanks with a soft smile. "I didn't get your name?" Sydney turned to the doctor in front of her.

"Dr. Ryan Peterson." He extended his hand for her to shake. "I've taken over as Ms. Derevko's primary doctor now that's she's holding stable. I didn't catch your name?"

"Sydney Bristow." She offered a small smile.

"Bristow? Sydney…" The doctor looked from her to Jack with surprise. "Your mother was Laura Bristow, the English Lit. Professor here at UCLA wasn't she?"

"Yes." Sydney breathed out in a whisper.

"She used to talk about you all the time." He smiled sadly, "I was in her class the year she passed away but-" The pieces started coming together for the doctor as he looked at the girl in front of him and then to the woman lying in the bed behind the glass, "My God! That's her isn't it? I thought she looked familiar, but I thought it had to be impossible…"

"Yes, Irina was…is Laura." Jack answered honestly, seeing the doctor was about to ask more questions he undoubtedly had, "It's a long story." This was the problem with going to civilian hospitals.

"I'll take your word for it." Dr. Peterson shook his head in disbelief with a smile as he looked over her chart. "It's amazing and I promise, we'll take the very best care of her." He smiled up at Sydney and Jack, "Her class was always my favorite, even though she gave me a hard time." He laughed, "She was tough, but she was also funny as hell. I'm looking forward to her waking up so that I can say, 'hello."

"I'm sure she'll like that." Sydney gave him a small smile through her tears, having never met a student of her mother's before and hoping that it would be true; her mother would pull through this.

"Thank you." Jack, Sydney and Katya offered in unison.

"I'll be back in a half hour to check in." He nodded with a soft smile and headed in the direction of the nurses station.

"Dad," Sydney turned in her father's arms to embrace him, "What happened?"

"Your mother was pardoned." Jack smiled speaking softly.

"She was?" Sydney's heart began beat faster, a smile spreading through her tears. "What happened? What changed?"

"I think you know better then we do, Sydney. Katya stepped forward, her heavy accent, breaking through a small smile, "Why don't you fill us in." Her smile turning into the same Cheshire cat grin that Irina always wore.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Sydney's gaze darted to Vaughn and back, wondering what he'd told them.

"It seems that the President and First Lady had some unexpected visitors drop by last night." Kendall crossed his arms in an attempt to look stern.

Sydney's eyes once again sought out Vaughn's whom was shaking his head 'no' he hadn't said anything.

"Brought some information to their attention bringing along and I quote, 'a powerful tool of persuasion." Kendall's arms relaxed and he reached out to stroke the bottom of Lena's foot, giving Sydney a smile, who was looking very much like a deer in headlights.

"He called an emergency meeting with Putin and agreed to pardon Irina." Katya reached out and embraced Sydney's forearm with her hand, tears in her eyes.

"That's where you went to the other night, wasn't it?" Jack spoke softly looking Sydney in the eye, "And took your sister as your 'powerful tool of persuasion?"

"Dad," Sydney started to panic thinking of how much trouble she was going to be in with her father for breaking into the White House with her sister, "Dad, I had to!" The tears sprang forward once again, "If you want me to apologize for doing anything to save Mom, I won't!"

"Sydney," Jack grabbed her shoulders, "It's ok." He smiled "You saved her life, Sydney! You saved her life." His tears brimming on the edge of his lids, threatening to fall, he pulled her and the baby to his chest fiercely. "Thank you."

"I just hope it wasn't too late." Sydney dried the tears on her cheeks looking at her mother through the glass once again.


	21. Chapter 21

**_AN: _Music for this chapter (on repeat): _Safe and Sound by Sheryl Crow, I Shall Believe by Sheryl Crow, Dream by The Cranberries, Inner Smile by Texas, Timeless_ by Kate Havnevik, Ice_ by Sarah McLachlan._**

* * *

TWENTY-ONE

o

_***Safe And Sound***_

In the early hours of the morning, Sydney had fallen asleep sitting in a chair next to Irina, while Lena slept against her chest. She had yet to change out of the clothes she'd worn to the Execution and into the ones Vaughn had brought back for her. She was awakened by Lena's soft stirring and found a nurse hanging a new IV bag for Irina and checking her vitals.

"Good morning." The nurse smiled softly. Seeing Sydney's gaze go immediately to her mother's monitors she added, "Don't worry. She's holding her own and improving every hour."

Sydney smiled and glanced around the room, noticing both her father and Katya were absent. She found her father standing just outside the glass speaking with Kendall who'd just returned to the hospital after going home last night and checking in with the office this morning.

"How much longer do you think it will be, before she wakes up?" Sydney picked up her mother's limp hand, rubbing the back with her thumb.

"Can't say. She's been through a terrible ordeal and sleep is the body's natural way of giving the body time to heal." The nurse smiled sadly seeing the fallen look on Sydney's face. "I have an idea." She leaned over Irina and gently untied the hospital gown from behind her neck, pulling the gown down just enough to expose part of Irina's chest.

Sydney was watching her with mild fascination.

"May I?" The nurse motioned for Sydney to hand her the baby. Still unsure what the woman was going to do, Sydney gently passed her Lena.

Katya had returned with coffee and stood just as awestruck by what the nurse was doing as Sydney.

The nurse laid Lena gently on the bed and proceeded to remove her clothing, "In the NIC-U, Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, they do what's called, 'kangarooing.' It's where the mother or father spends hours with their premature babies, chest to chest, heartbeat to heartbeat."

Leaving the baby just in a diaper she turned Lena onto her stomach and laid her directly on Irina's chest .

"This kind of connection has been scientifically proven to improve the baby's health and lead to a speedier recovery." She explained while covering Lena and Irina with Lena's soft baby blanket. "If it works for the babies, it should work the other way around as well and help your mother to a speedier recovery." She smiled at Sydney and Katya when she'd finished, "You watch…your mother's breathing will soon become in-sync with your sister's." She winked and moved to leave the room.

"Thank you." Sydney smiled, marveled by this technique.

Minutes after the nurse had left, Irina's heartbeat had picked up and she was beginning to breathe on her own in-sync with Lena.

Jack and Kendall had come in, wondering what was going on and Sydney filled them in on the kangarooing technique that seemed to be working. All stood fascinated, watching the change in Irina, as the baby slept on her chest.

"This is amazing." Katya watched as her sister and niece began their rhythmic breathing.

The doctor had told them that if Irina kept breathing on her own for another two hours, they would remove the ventilator tube.

An hour later, Marshall stood knocking on the window, big smile on his face. They motioned for him to come in. "It broke…the story," He smiled nervously, wringing his hands. "Oh, doesn't that just break your heart." He looked at Irina with the baby on her chest, bringing his fist to his chest with a smile.

"What story, Marshall?" Jack asked taking a sip of coffee.

"Her story." He looked from Irina to Sydney and Jack nervously and then to Katya. "Yours, too, ma'am. I don't know how it's out but it is. It's all over the Russian and European networks. It just broke here. They're talking about it on every major network. They know who she is, 'the Romanov,' daughter of Anastasia, how your grandmother survived, the whole story, Syd. It's out." He rambled on nervously.

"They know about her execution?" Sydney was immediately alarmed it would somehow affect her mother's pardon.

"No, no, no." He rambled on, "Not that. Right now they're concentrating on the fact that there is proof your grandmother survived the massacre and had two daughters. One, obviously being your mother and all that she's been doing in Russia anonymously for all these years. There's a big frenzy now that the rumor all these years has been proven true. Everybody wants to meet and interview the Romanovs. Especially your mother as she is the Tsarina by birth, now that your grandmother's gone." He swallowed hard seeing Jack's steely gaze and the tightening of his grip on the cup.

"Do they know Irina's here?" Jack was immediately concerned for her safety if the paparazzi was looking for her. She was in no shape to fend them off.

"They don't know she's here, they don't know where she is. That's part of the mystery everyone is focusing on, which I can see why, it is all fascinating." He tried to assure Jack quickly, "But her picture 'is' on every network. See look." He admitted slowly taking a step back from Jack and pointing to a TV in the hall that was broadcasting the story, and as Marshall said, there was Irina's picture.

"Oh my God, I need to call Vladimir." Katya stood from her chair immediately concerned and left the room.

"I'll get security up here immediately," Kendall stepped into the hall pulling out his cell phone.

"How she doing?" Marshall asked, giving Sydney a sympathetic look.

"Better." She smiled genuinely and picked up Irina's hand again.

"I can't reach him." Katya flew back into the room, grabbing her purse, intending to leave.

"Um, I think I know why," Marshall stuttered pointing out the glass window to the hall. "Isn't that him? With the President and First Lady."

Walking down the hall towards them was indeed, Vladimir Putin, President Bush and the First Lady, surrounded by Secret Service. All other motion on the hospital floor had ceased watching them walk towards the room.

"Dear God," Jack watched as the Secret Service took positions around the floor and Vladimir nodded at Katya through the window. She was out the door in flash and had thrown her arms around him, hugging him tightly.

"Thank you, thank you, Vladimir." She spoke in Russian, smiling through happy tears at him.

"How is she?" He asked, holding her hand and wiping the tears with the other. Obvious to everyone they knew each other well.

"Holding stable and improving." She smiled hopefully towards Irina behind the glass. "President Bush…First Lady," Katya addressed them. "Thank you." She nodded her appreciation, afraid to say more and burst into tears.

"It was the right thing to do." The President clasped her hand in his.

"Can we see her?" Vladimir asked in English, not wanting to leave the others out of the conversation.

Katya shook her head yes and opened the door to Irina's room.

"Director Kendall," The President shook Kendall's hand on the way by, Kendall standing by the door in awe and shock. First, by the fact they were there and second, that the President remembered his name.

"Vladimir, I would like you to meet Jack Bristow. Irina's husband." Katya stepped closer to Irina's bed.

Jack stepped forward to shake his hand still in shock this was all happening. "President Putin. My wife speaks very highly of you."

"Call me Vladimir, please." Putin smiled and then glanced at Irina. "It is an honor to meet the man who captured our dear Irina's heart." He held Jack's hand a bit longer to express his supportiveness.

"Agent Bristow," President Bush stepped forward to greet Jack.

"Thank you." Were the first words out of Jack's mouth as he captured his hand. "Thank you." He repeated.

"It is not I you should 'Thank,' but your courageous daughter." He smiled at Sydney now standing by her mother's side. "Hello Sydney."

"Mr. President." Sydney already had tears in her eyes, "Thank you…for saving my mother…for doing the right thing."

"Thank 'you,' Sydney," He moved to her side taking her hand in his, "For reminding me what's important." His eyes got teary and he pulled her into a hug, "I'm sorry I didn't do it sooner. I'm so sorry."

Vladimir and Laura had moved to Irina's side opposite Sydney and the President. Vladimir leaned over Irina and kissed her forehead, then cheek, murmuring something softly to her in Russian while he lay his hand gently over Lena's back.

"This, Mr. President, is my mother, Irina." Sydney turned back towards her mother, smoothing Irina's hair with her hand.

The President and First Lady stepped up the bed, on opposite sides. He picked up Irina's hand and ran his thumb over her fingers momentarily. "I'm sorry." He leaned over and kissed Irina's forehead, tears in his eyes. He lay his hand gently on Lena's back and smiled while his wife ran her hand gently over the baby's soft hair, leaning over to place a kiss just in front of Lena's tiny ear.

"Hello Lena." Laura whispered into her ear before joining hands with her husband over the pair sleeping in the bed.

An orderly brought in more chairs for everyone and Jack and Katya began filling them in on Irina's prognosis and what was being done to treat her when the doctor came in, quite stunned at the group gathered, and removed Irina's ventilator tube as promised when she was breathing on her own for two hours. Sydney only removed Lena from her position on Irina's chest to feed and change her, as the connection with the baby was obviously working in Irina's favor. The current newsbreak, they'd found out was actually Vladimir's idea, on agreement with the President, in order to give Irina her pardon on terms of Diplomatic Immunity. Vladimir had confirmed Sydney's story that Irina was the real force behind the government and Tsar by birth, if the Russian monarchy were still in practice. President Bush also informed them that Senator Douglas had been arrested that morning for conspiracy and withholding evidence from the President, something that made Jack very happy. The man who had condemned Irina to die was now facing similar charges.

_***I Shall Believe ***_

About an hour after the tube was removed, Irina's fingers began to twitch. "I think she's waking up." Sydney smiled hopefully, sitting beside Irina.

Everyone's attention went to Irina as her fingers closed around Sydney's.

"Mom." Sydney urged her on by whispering in her ear. "Wake up."

Irina's eyes slowly began to flutter open and then closed again.

"I'll get a doctor." Kendall left the room in search of help.

"Irina." Jack leaned over her, nuzzling his face into the back of her neck and hair, whispering in her ear. "Come on, My Love, open your eyes."

The love, Sydney had spoken of between her parents was obvious to the President and First Lady watching the interaction with their own fascination. Laura curled into her husband's side as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her close.

"That's it." Jack smiled when Irina's eyes finally did open with slow blinks. He was inches from her face. The emotion running through her eyes, obvious in confusion as she looked back at him.

"Jack." Her small voice came out, cracked and horse from the ventilator tube.

"Yes," He smiled, tears pooling in his eyes as he stroked her hair.

"How?" Her eyes started to fill with tears, still not understanding what was going on. "I'm dead…"

"No." He kissed her forehead, cheeks and finally her mouth in rapid succession. "You're very much alive." He pulled back and wiped the tears that had escaped her eyes.

"I'm not dreaming." She rasped out, searching his eyes for understanding.

"No." He took her hand and kissed it and then her lips again.

"Sydney…Lena?" She whispered, squeezing Jack's hand.

He leaned back taking her hand and placed it on the baby's back, still lying on her chest while Sydney's hand covered hers. "Right here, My Love, right here."

Irina slowly turned her head and was met with a tiny head of black hair and Sydney's infectious smile.

"Mom." Sydney cried, and leaned her head into Irina's neck, sobbing in relief.

Irina, moved her free hand slowly up to Sydney's head against her neck as her own tears fell.

It was when Sydney pulled back that Irina saw Katya right behind her and smiled as her little sister leaned over and kissed her forehead, wiping her tears.

"Oh, Irina." She smiled, brushing her sister's tears away. "Whatever are we going to do with you?" She teased her in Russian, smiling through her tears.

As Katya pulled back, Irina heard sniffling and it was then she could see there were others in the room.

The entire scene had caused both Presidents and the First Lady to cry. Laura was smiling through her own happy tears as she dotted her cheeks with a tissue.

"Vladimir?" Irina croaked out in her raspy voice, still unsure if she was seeing what she was seeing.

"Yes, Irina." He stepped forward taking her hand and kissing it, then bent over and repeated the whole kissing of the forehead and then her cheeks.

"I don't understand." She whispered watching as he stepped back.

"You've been pardoned, Irina. You've been granted absolution. You are free." He smiled proudly.

"Free?" She searched Jack's eyes for conformation. He nodded 'yes,' and she closed her eyes, tears falling from them this time in relief and joy.

Kendall appeared with the doctor On-Call and two nurses at his side.

"I'm going to have to ask you all to step out for a minute." The doctor announced. "Hello, Irina." He smiled as he and the nurses began working feverishly around her. "I'm Dr. Johnson."

Sydney kissed Irina and then slowly pulled Lena away from the warmth of Irina's chest, wrapping her in the blanket and following everyone into the hall.

Jack was the last to leave her side, "We'll be right back." He bent to kiss her but she held his hand, preventing him from leaving.

"Jack, don't leave me." She pleaded in a raspy voice, fresh tears in her eyes.

Seeing that she was still upset, scared and confused by all this, he took a seat on the bed next to her, holding her hand in his.

"Ok, I won't leave you." He kissed her hand as the doctor and nurses worked around them.

"May I?" Laura asked once they were all in the hall, the itch to hold the tiny baby unbearable.

"Of course," Sydney smiled and gently passed her sleeping sister to the First Lady.

"Oh, she's so beautiful," Laura cooed as George joined her side, "It's been so long since our girls were this small." Both marveling at Lena's tiny hands and feet.

"She looks just like your mother." The President smiled up at Sydney, who was smiling madly watching her parents in the other room.

"Theirs…is such an amazingly beautiful love story," Laura saw what held Sydney's attention and smiled with her. "Defying everyone and everything to be together."

"Yeah," Sydney agreed softly, smiling through her tears once again, "Even death."

"She's going to be ok, Sydney." Vladimir wrapped his arm around Sydney's shoulders. "I know your mother and she is a fighter. She has a strong spirit."

Jack, with the doctor, filled Irina in on what had happened during the Execution and what her condition was at the present. Her liver was holding stable and the dialysis was relieving the pressure on her kidneys. Irina's pancreas was still not producing any insulin and so for now, she would have to keep taking insulin. Irina was worried that she wouldn't be able to continue breast-feeding Lena after all this but the doctor said that once they had filtered all the toxins out of her system, she could continue with no harm to the baby. He was going to have a lactation consultant stop by later in the day to begin working with Irina on getting her back into a normal feeding schedule as soon as possible. The doctor had told them he would check in with them once more before his shift ended but that he was very hopeful with Irina's prognosis.

"You can go back in now," The doctor smiled at Sydney when he left the room.

"Thank you." She smiled in return and they all filtered back into the room.

"Irina," The President greeted her carrying Lena when they entered the room. "I'm afraid I owe you, a rather large apology." He came to sit in the chair next to her. Jack remained seated on the bed opposite him, holding Irina's hand. "I am so sorry to have put you, your family through this." He looked at Sydney and then the sweet baby in his arms.

"Thank you." Irina offered him a small grateful smile, reaching her hand over slowly to hold his.

"Your daughter Sydney has taught me a few things. First, that I need a better security system and we have excellent people working in the CIA." He smiled up at Sydney and everyone else laughed, except for Irina who had no idea what he was talking about. "Second, that I need better advisors," His tone grew more serious. "And third, that the love between a parent and child abides by no boundaries or laws made by man, only the heart." He placed the baby into her arms with a smile.

Irina felt a chill run down her spine at how similar his words were to her mother's twenty two years ago when Irina was doing any and everything to protect her child.

"Sydney?" Irina reached her hand out to Sydney, realizing her daughter was responsible for saving her life but not sure how.

Sydney shyly took her mother's hand but said nothing.

"She broke into our bedroom, with an Agent Vaughn," The President smiled and looked up at Sydney, seeing she wasn't going to give out any information. "And the baby, to convince me that I was missing some key pieces of information concerning your case."

"Sydney…" Irina squeezed her hand, startled to hear what her daughter had done, tears springing to her eyes at just how far Sydney had gone to save her.

"I couldn't lose you again." Sydney angrily wiped her tears away.

"Oh, Sweetheart." Irina pulled on Sydney's arm, pulling her into her and embracing her, sharing in her tears.

"Irina, there is something you should know." Vladimir, sat at the end of her bed, "Your secret is out. Everyone knows you are 'The Romanov.'"

"What?" She asked startled by yet another surreal event she'd learned of since she'd awaken. "How?"

"In order to give you a full pardon under our laws, no questions asked…it had to be under Diplomatic Immunity." President Bush explained.

"And you are the true ruler of Russia." Vladimir smiled softly. "It was time for the world to know who you are, Irina. We had to save your life."

Marshall came bounding in the door again, "Word's out, they suspect Ms. Derevko is here, knowing that the Russian and US Presidents are both here, well it's not too much of a stretch of the imagination."

"Now what?" Irina asked after a moment of silence.

"We have a lot to talk about." President Bush smiled, "But that can wait for now. Now, I just want you to concentrate on getting well, and spending some time with your family."

"Which is why we should be going." Laura smiled taking her husbands hand. "It is an honor to meet you, Irina. You are a truly remarkable woman, something I see you've passed onto your daughter." She turned to Sydney giving her arm a light squeeze.

"We'll be in touch." The President leaned over and kissed Irina's cheek. "Whatever you need…don't hesitate. I'll make sure you have plenty of security. No one will bother you." He shook Jack's hand and both nodded in acknowledgement.

"Irina," Vladimir came to sit on the bed beside her. "I'll take care of everything, don't worry." He smiled. "The people are already shouting for a 'monarchy' again."

"Oh Vladimir, that was never my intention." Irina sighed, the enormity behind it all weighing heavily on her mind.

"I know," He smiled, "But I will not be sad to give up the Presidency in favor of a monarchy with you on the throne my beautiful, Irina, if that is what our people want." He wiped a tear from her cheek, "Please, rest, spend time with your family and we'll be in touch."

"Thank you." She held his hand in hers.

"Thank you." Jack could see that this man was indeed 'smitten' with his wife, as Katya had said, feeling a twinge of jealousy at their closeness.

"Katya," He got up from the bed to say goodbye to Katya.

"I'll walk you out." Katya linked her arm in the crook of his elbow and escorted the Presidents and First Lady to their car.

"Well, well, well." Cuvee reached up touching the jagged scar on his neck, watching the news reports of Irina's face flashing across the screen. "The Royal Whore Returns." He smiled his slimy grin as he poured a glass of vodka. "Where are you, My Dear?"

"Hello Irina." The handsome doctor smiled at her as she awakened the next morning. "Do you remember me?" He asked tucking her chart under his arm, glancing at Jack and Sydney.

Irina's eyes immediately flew to his nametag, 'Dr. Peterson,' searching her memory. "Ryan Peterson? Class of '82, second column, third row, fifth seat in from the left, Ryan Peterson?" Irina smirked at him mercilessly, remembering exactly who he was.

"Yes!" The good doctor laughed out loud, "My God, that was twenty years ago and you still remember exactly where I sat!"

"I remember where all my students sat. You used to tease that poor girl, Ann Bartholomew?" She paused momentarily to gauge his response, "Yes, Ann…everyday, every class and you always had a smartass comment," She smiled and everyone else laughed.

"Yeah, I used to do that in my younger stupid days." He admitted shyly. "I always teased the ones I liked. I'll admit, you were my Mrs. Robison. I was such an idiot. I had the biggest crush on you, thought I could 'woo' you away from your husband with my smartass wit." He laughed at her expression and gave Jack a smile. "What guy wasn't in love with you then? Every guy, I knew."

Irina blushed, laughing and Jack enjoyed the exchange, seeing a wedding ring on the man's finger he felt completely secure he was no longer trying to 'woo' her away.

"I wonder what ever happened to Ann?" Irina smiled changing subjects and shifting Lena who was still sleeping on her chest. "She was such an excellent student."

"She's a High School English teacher in Santa Monica, married to some bloke, has three kids, she's still as beautiful as ever." He smiled, and showed her his ring.

"You?" Irina shouted in surprise.

"Told 'ya. I always teased the ones I liked." He winked at Irina.

"That's a great story." She smiled happily for them.

"Not quite as great as the one I'm hearing about you…Laura… Irina… English professor… didn't really die but was a KGB spy…and now Tsar of Russia?" He raised his eyebrows at her teasing. "That's a story I'll have to hear sometime. Make a great story for my grandkids someday to hear about how Grandpa's English Lit Professor was really a spy for the KGB and secret Tsar of Russia."

"It's a long story." Irina smiled speaking slowly shaking her head, smiling at Jack.

"So I hear." He smiled at Jack and took her hand in his. "I'll be back to check on you later. You're making excellent progress. Hopefully, we'll have you out of her and home before Thanksgiving. I'm so happy to know you 'are' alive, Professor Bristow."

"Me too." She smiled at him. "Me too." She repeated softly stroking the baby's hair, smiling at Jack and Sydney.

* * *

_***Dream***_

"We have to hurry. They're going to be here any minute." Sydney smiled as Vaughn finished setting the table and she lit the candles.

"Seriously, this is ridiculous. When's the last time you guys used these lights?" Weiss emerged from the attic, Christmas lights wrapped around him in massive knots.

"Twenty-two years ago." Sydney smiled sadly, "After my mom was gone, my dad never put them up again on Thanksgiving."

"Oh." Weiss felt like kicking himself in the ass. "Sorry, Syd." He untangled himself.

"Don't be sorry." She smiled helping to rid him of the lights. "We're bringing back that tradition this year."

"You may need Jack'o there to buy some new lights." Weiss threw them onto the back porch.

"Jack-o?" Vaughn laughed incredulously at Weiss's choice of nicknames.

"Well we could always go with 'Panama Jack?" Weiss stuffed a carrot from the relish tray in his mouth. "I think it's appropriate, considering." He waggled his eyebrows.

Vaughn burst into tears with laughter, as did Sydney after she turned ten shades of red.

"You guys are terrible!" She hit them both with a potholder.

"So what time are the Spyrents supposed to be here anyway?" Weiss helped Sydney to turn the turkey in the oven.

"Spyrents?" She gave him another look, sliding the turkey back into the oven. "You mean my parents?"

"Yeah, you know, SpyDaddy 'Panama Jack,' SpyMommy 'Tsarina Irina' and let's not forget Spybaby Lena." He laughed continuing to mash potatoes while Vaughn had a hard time standing he was laughing so hard.

"Spybaby?" Sydney shook her head getting a bottle of wine.

"Well, she did break into the White House with you two! I'd say its bound to be genetic."

Sydney laughed pouring them both a glass while they waited.

"Let's not forget Spykid Syd!" Vaughn burst into laughter as Sydney hurled the potholder at him, all laughing hysterically.

Something that felt so good after so much sadness over the last few weeks.

"You're such an ass!" She laughed grabbing Vaughn by the front of the shirt, kissing him hard before swatting him on the butt.

"What's so funny?" Jack smiled enjoying seeing Sydney laughing as he stood in the doorway to the kitchen, joined by Irina carrying the baby and Katya just behind her.

"Oh good! The Spyrents are here!" Weiss smiled and downed his last bit of wine.

"Spyrents?" Jack looked at the man curiously as Sydney kissed him and her mother 'hello.'

"Spyrents? I am unfamiliar with this English word." Katya kissed Sydney's cheek breezing by her.

"Mom, welcome home." Sydney smiled getting teary eyed already. "Happy Thanksgiving." She reached over and hugged her mother fiercely.

"I love you." Irina whispered into her ear in Russian and then repeated it in English when she backed away and cupped Sydney's chin.

"Irina," Weiss gave her a hug, feeling that today was starting new; 'why not hug the woman who's screwdriver shot me? '"I'm glad you're feeling better."

"Thank you, Eric." She smiled, enjoying her daughter's friends that made Sydney smile. "Michael," Irina reached with the one arm not holding the baby, out to hug Vaughn, kissing him on the cheek. "I haven't had a chance to 'Thank You,' for going with Sydney to Washington," She looked up, tears in her eyes, "Once again you helped save my life. 'Thank You.'"

Vaughn's only response was to smile.

"I'm famished." Katya announced, smelling the scent of wonderful food cooking in the air. "I've never been to one of these 'Thanksgivings' so lets get the show on the road."

They all sat around the living room table, Jack and Irina at the heads with Weiss and Sydney on one side, Katya and Vaughn on the other.

"I almost forgot." Irina shrugged getting up from the table with a sigh, "Please excuse me." She said quietly, laying the sleeping baby in the Moses basket, grabbing a small black bag, making her way to the kitchen.

"Where's she going?" Sydney looked to her father curiously, setting her napkin across her lap.

"Checking her blood sugar, I imagine." Jack got up from the table and followed Irina into the kitchen.

"How long did the doctor say she'd have to keep taking insulin?" Sydney asked Katya, concerned for her mother who was obviously upset about it.

"Irina," Jack announced softly as he came up behind her.

She had just finished checking her blood and was now flicking the syringe full of insulin to get air bubbles out, the tears in her eyes evident of her frustrations.

"Are you ok?" He asked softly, helping her by swabbing the spot on her stomach with alcohol she'd chosen to do the injection this time.

"I'm fine." Irina tried to smile through her tears while she jammed the needle into her skin. "I don't like needles." She sighed placing the old syringe in the little orange box the doctor had given them.

Jack understood her dislike of needles, constant reminders of Kashmir and now, her Execution. "I know you're not fine." He pulled her slowly into his arms, wrapping them around her while her tears broke.

"I feel like such an ingrate." She buried her face into his neck, "I'm alive, Jack. Nothing else should matter but..."

"But what?" He asked softly, running his hand down the silky-smoothness of her long hair.

"He said at this point, it's permanent." Katya answered softly, pouring herself a glass of wine. "She's not producing any insulin anymore so from here on, she will have to have insulin injections."

"But I was dead, Jack. I was dead. And I know it." She held him tighter as more tears came. "I prepared myself to die, accepted it. Saw the light and then all of the sudden I am alive again. I can't help it. I am an emotional mess."

"Shhh," He soothed, burying his face into her hair, "I can't say I understand what you're going through but Irina, it's ok. You're allowed to feel this way and you're not an ingrate for it. It's only been a few days. Give yourself time."

Everyone left in the dining room hung their' heads in silence, pouring more wine and thinking about Irina's now lifelong, constant reminder of her Execution.

They held each other a moment longer when Irina pulled back, big smile on her face, obviously trying to cover any unsettling feelings she was harboring. She kissed him soundly on the lips and wiping away any lingering tears she announced, "I have so much to be thankful for this year and I haven't celebrated Thanksgiving in twenty years, so damnit! Let's go eat some turkey!" She laughed and grabbed Jack's hand. "Geez, did somebody die?" Irina smiled trying to lighten the mood, seeing the sullen group of people now occupying the dining room. She glanced over to the basket and ran her fingers over the baby's cheek before taking a seat. "Jack,'' She took her seat at the end of the table and rested her chin on her crossed hands. "Would you do the honor?" She asked resuming a tradition started thirty years ago.

They all held hands and listened as Jack repeated the Lord's Prayer, completely ironic for them now and yet, absolutely necessary after all the miracles that had occurred in the last few weeks.

"I would like to purpose a toast." Irina raised her glass, "To living as if everyday is your last, and to loving like it will go on forever. Cheers!" She smiled and everyone clinked glasses.

Jack proceeded to carve the turkey and the lightened mood returned, everyone was smiling and laughing again over Weiss's Christmas light story.

Having decided that after the meal, the 'men' would make a trip to Home Depot and buy new lights, so the house wouldn't burn down before Christmas.

"Panama Jack, want to pass me the potatoes?" Weiss poured another glass of wine, feeling free and easy with a little help from the alcohol. When all motion on the table ceased, "Did I just say that out loud?"

_***Inner Smile***_

"Panama Jack." Irina repeated and then burst out laughing seeing everyone's faces turning red, especially Sydney's. "Mmm, I like it, I think I may have to keep that one." She winked at Jack who'd gone from looking like he was going to kill someone to holding in laughter.

"Oh no." Sydney groaned taking another heaping of green bean casserole as unwanted mental images began flashing through her mind.

"I don't get it." Katya looked annoyed taking another sip of wine.

"Panama Jack is an American clothing line and rum and now, a reference to the events surrounding Lena's conception." Irina smiled holding in her laughter as well.

"Oh, yes! That was some story, Jack." Katya took a long sip of wine and winked at him, "I had to keep fanning myself hearing the details." She waved her hand in front of her face, "Don't you think it's getting a little hot in here?"

"Oh brother," Sydney shook her head and poured a sizeable glass of wine while Vaughn and Weiss were about ready to spit out turkey and mashed potatoes holding in their laughter.

"That move you did placing the tracker, very nice." Katya continued to make the fanning motion in front of her face seeing Jack turn red.

"Katya!" Irina scolded her sister, trying not to laugh seeing that Sydney was absolutely about to die.

"Five weeks." Jack looked right at Irina and smiled seductively, feeling himself getting heated just over the vivid flashes from that night and counting down until the day he could have a repeat or two or three.

"Five weeks." Irina repeated with the same heated gaze.

"Five weeks, until what?" Weiss asked and then, the 'lights' went on. "Oh-hh!" He smiled finishing another glass off, nodding at Jack with a wink.

"Oh brother, fine!" Sydney downed her whole glass. "Fine. If we're sharing sex talk then I had the best, most wild, out of control, crazy sex with Vaughn in the shower this morning, almost shattered the glass."

Vaughn, Weiss and Jack all spit food out across the table, choking and causing Sydney to smile. "And we're likely to have a repeat tonight."

Katya clasped her hands together and threw her head back in laughter, "She is a Derevko!"

"Sydney!" Vaughn admonished her, feeling Jack's heated gaze.

"Sydney." Jack looked at her turning bright red watching her smile smugly and pour herself another drink.

"It's not so much fun, those mental images I'm giving you, huh, Daddy?" She smiled having a stare down with her father.

All Irina could do was smile and shrug at Jack, with sympathy as Sydney's father.

"Sydney." Irina reached over and clasped her daughter's hand on the table, trying to hold back her giggles, proud of her daughter. "Please Sweetheart, lets not give your father a heart-attack, I've had enough of hospitals for a lifetime."

"Fine. Then you two stop giving 'me' mental images, please!" Sydney poured another glass, smiling, as this was sort of fun: giving her parents a hard time for a change. She'd missed it during the normal crazy teenage years. "I'm happy you're happy and all, but must I hear the details! Like my father lusting after my mother, counting down the days until he can jump her!"

"Are all Thanksgivings this much fun?" Katya kept laughing. "I think I shall attend every year!"

"This is the best Thanksgiving I've ever had." Weiss slapped Vaughn on the back in congratulations. "I hope I never have daughters. I'll be a wreck!"

Lena began fussing and Irina went to pick her up, bringing her back to the table with her, the baby having already fallen asleep in the crook of her arm. "And just to think, we have one more to go." She smiled at Jack, knowing he was already imagining his baby being just as wild as her mother and apparently, sister.

* * *

_***Timeless***_

Dinner finished with relative ease after switching topics of conversation to the memories they all had of prior Thanksgivings. Everyone helped to clear the table and sat in the living room in front of the fireplace continuing to share their favorite memories. Irina and the baby had gone upstairs so she could change Lena into her pajamas but hadn't returned for quite sometime. Sydney and her father shared a knowing glance and Sydney moved off the couch and headed up the stairs in search of her mom.

"Mom," She tapped on her father's bedroom door and it opened slightly. Her mother was sitting in the rocking chair in the corner nursing her sister. Irina had obvious tears in her eyes.

"Are you, ok?" Sydney sat softly on the edge of the bed just in front of her mother.

"I'm fine, Sweetheart. Really." Irina reached her hand out and clasped Sydney's. "I'm just really happy, an emotional sap at the moment." Irina looked around the room. "It is so surreal for me, to be in this room, this house after leaving it so long ago. It's like an old friend." She smiled. "I used to sit in this very spot, rocking you to sleep and now here I am again. I never thought this was possible." More tears came to her eyes and she brushed them away. Trailing her finger up the baby's tiny arm and hand nuzzled against her soft flesh.

"I remember you rocking me. I used to have my nannies rock me in this chair before bed," Sydney's tears started, "I would pretend they were you and I always went to sleep praying that I would see you in my dreams."

"Sydney, I'm so sorry." Irina's unshed tears finally fell as she spoke softly.

"It's ok, Mom because I understand now. You did what you had to do." She knelt on the carpet and fingered her sister's foot hanging out beneath her mother's arm. "And you were suffering without me, just as much as I was with out you. I love you more now then I ever did in a memory." She admitted, smiling up at Irina.

The beloved image she once held in her memory of her mother now replaced and surpassed by the real thing.

Irina cupped her chin, "I love you too, more then I could possibly every put into words. Sydney, I know that you were planning on staying at Michael's house tonight, but I would really like it if I had my family, my complete family under this roof again if only for one night. Michael can stay if you want, but I-"

"Of course, Mom." Sydney smiled, enjoying the idea of waking up in this house again with her mother there. "How are you feeling, honestly?"

"Honestly," Irina dropped her gaze to the baby still nursing and fast falling asleep, "Like I've been run over by a train, and tortured for a month."

"I can only imagine." Sydney spoke slowly and kissed the bottom of Lena's foot, tears springing to her eyes again. "Watching you on that table..." She shook the mental image of her mother's bleeding, flopping body being shocked back to life out of her mind.

"Sydney," Irina smoothed her hand over the back of her eldest daughter's head, the pain of her daughter having to watch her own mother's execution tearing at her heart.

"Mom," Sydney looked up meeting Irina's eyes, "I know you probably don't want to talk about this, never want to think about it and I'm sorry for bringing it up but what Cuvee did to you in Kashmir…"

Irina swallowed hard, caught off guard by the sudden rush of emotions those two words put together inspired in her: Cuvee and Kashmir.

"Mom, I'm not an evil person but I want to make him pay. Slowly, and painfully I want to make him pay."

Irina was quiet a moment. "Sweetheart, I know you're not an evil person. You could never be." She smiled softly at her daughter, "But this should not be your battle. It is mine. And before you object," She could see Sydney on the verge of interrupting, "As moved as I am that you love me that much to want to, I cannot let you." She cupped her daughters face, making her look her in the eye. "Sydney, I am too fearful of what he would do to you if he ever…as your mother I cannot let that happen to you." Her eyes filled with tears again. "I promise you, I will deal with him in my own time. He will pay for what he has done." She started to smile, "But Sloane, well you have suffered just as much by his hand, if not more." She looked sadly at her daughter thinking about Danny. "So, I would love to have you by my side when I find and gut that weasel. Finally, working on the same team again." She smiled thinking about how fun it was in actuality to work with she and Jack in India and Kashmir. Well, the happier moments anyway.

"Just as long as you're the one that finally kills him." Sydney ran her thumb over Lena's ear, "So we can end this _'effin_ prophecy once and for all."

Irina started to giggle at Sydney's choice of wording. "So eloquently put, Sweetheart. You have a way with words tonight." Irina giggled and Sydney laughed.

"Yeah well, I know this sounds strange but talking with you about 'man issues' is completely different then talking about them with Dad. Like I would be completely 'ok' talking to you about Vaughn and I, or even you talking to me about your experiences, but telling Dad…or worse, hearing Dad tell me about you and him… Oh no!" She made a scrunched face that had Irina shaking with held in giggles. "It's just different with your father."

"Yes," Irina agreed, "I could talk to my mother about boys and hear her stories but talking to my father, no. I think it's because they'd like to believe we'll remain virgins all our life and we'd like to believe we were conceived through Immaculate Conception." She laughed.

"Yes!" Sydney smiled brightly, her mother understanding perfectly. They were quiet a moment before Sydney picked up Irina's hand holding it close to her heart. "I've waited all my life to have conversations like this with you. To have my mother be my best friend, my confidant."

"Oh Sydney," Irina brought her daughter's hand to her lips, "Me, too."

"Let's stay in our pajamas all morning and watch sappy love story movies on the AMC Channel while Dad, Eric and Vaughn put up Christmas lights."

"And every so often go out and laugh at them because its doubtful they'll be able to put them up without some sort of issue." Irina giggled liking this plan, as she still felt exhausted. "Yes, it's a date."

Sydney smiled looking at her mother's face for a long time. "I love you, Mom." She told her mother in Russian, bringing tears to Irina's eyes again.

"I love you to the moon and back, more than stars in the Heavens and the grains of sand on Earth, Sydney Anne. Forever and always." Irina answered in her native tongue. The sound of her mother's Russian language was soothing to Sydney now.

* * *

_***Ice ***_

Irina awoke with a start in the middle of the night. With her heart pounding in her ears she fought to slow her breathing and not disturb Jack lying beside her. Another nightmare of Kashmir, most likely brought on by Sydney's mentioning of the place earlier in the evening. Not that it was her daughter's fault, she had no idea how those words affected her mother, bringing back horrible images and feelings in the forms of nightmares.

This one she'd been asleep in her dirty bunk, awakened by the sound of the guards' heavy footsteps and the squeaking wheels of the metal cart. She could feel them grab her roughly, pinning her to the bed, as they smothered her mouth and the screams of protest. The needle jammed into her hip, reaching the bone, and then the paralysis. She could feel their sickening weight on top of her as they proceeded to take turns raping her, laughing and cheering each other on.

The deep bruises of handprints left on her body still visible even in this darkness twenty years later.

Irina shook her head of the mental image as a single tear rolled down her cheek. She carefully moved Jack's arm, lying across her stomach, and crept out of bed; thankful he was still a deep sleeper, something she used to use against him to look through his papers. The baby was now fast asleep in her bassinet and Irina gently leaned over and picked her up, holding her close to her chest, knowing that Lena would be awake any minute to eat.

Lena made soft squeaking noises from being disturbed and Irina's eyes flew to Jack, thankful he wasn't awakened. She didn't want to have to explain to him why she was sneaking out their room at 3:30 in the morning on her first night 'home.'

With the baby snuggled against her, Irina crept silently to the door and unlocked it, keeping an eye on Jack and slipped out the door, closing it softly behind her. Silently, she moved down the hall and down the stairs, finding her way around by moonlight cascading through the big French doors leading to the backyard and familiarity, Jack really had changed nothing as far as furniture placement in the last twenty years. She grabbed another blanket for the baby out of the Moses basket in the living room and carefully unlocked the front door, slipping out as she wrapped the extra blanket around her sleeping child, completely unaware she was being watched from the kitchen doorway.

Katya had trouble sleeping and had been sitting in the kitchen drinking tea when she heard someone downstairs. She watched silently as her sister snuck out of the house, seeing Irina's shadow behind the curtain on the other side of the glass taking a seat on the porch swing. She walked back into the kitchen and set her cup on the counter, retrieved the quilt on the back of the sofa and made her way outside.

Irina looked up startled from where she was now sitting on the swing, feeding the baby. When she realized it was Katya and not Sydney or Jack, she was somewhat relieved and gave her a small smile as her sister came to sit by her.

"Rina, it's freezing out here and you're sitting here in your nightgown." Katya scolded her softly wrapping the blanket around Irina's shoulders. "What are you doing?" She asked softly, brushing Irina's hair over her shoulder to get a better look at her sister, and found tear tracks on her cheeks.

"I couldn't sleep." Irina admitted softly looking down at the baby in her arms as another tear made its way, thinking about the horrible dream.

"Another nightmare?" Katya asked quietly, taking Irina's hand in her own, knowing now after reconnecting with Irina, how much her sister struggled with the demons of Kashmir.

Irina nodded, 'yes' and reached up with her hand to wipe the tears away. "They're coming back more frequently now."

"Rina," Katya began softly, laying one arm behind Irina on the back of the swing, "You need to talk to someone about it. You can't keep it in forever. Talk to me."

"No." Irina looked at her defiantly. "I don't want to talk about it. Talking about it only makes them come more frequently. If I don't talk about it, they'll eventually go away again." She looked out into the darkness.

"No Rina," Katya played with her sister's hair, "They won't go away, you'll just bury them again. Please Irina, if you won't talk to me, talk to Jack, or Sydney."

"No!" Irina turned her unshed teary eyes to her sister, "Especially not Jack and Sydney."

"Irina, they love you." Katya felt her eyes tearing up at seeing her sister waging such a battle within herself. "They'll help you. We'll all help you. Nobody's going to judge you-"

"Katya, please." Irina felt the tears rolling down her cheeks again; she closed her eyes, "Just let it go. I'll be ok. Please." Irina pleaded with her eyes.

Katya agreed and pulled Irina's head to her lips, kissing her hair. "For now my sister."

They sat that way, cuddled together on the swing for another twenty minutes until Lena had finished and fallen asleep again.

"Are you going back to bed?" Katya asked as they stood to enter the house again.

"No." Irina smiled softly, "You go on ahead."

"Rina, you must sleep." Katya looked disturbed as she rested her hand on the door handle. "You need your rest."

"I'm going to rest." She wrapped the baby's blanket tighter, "I'm going to meditate."

Katya nodded her head in understanding.

In the months she and Irina had spent together she'd come to realize that her sister used meditation instead of sleep as a way of resting. A way of avoiding sleep, because sleep brought the nightmares. They made their way inside the house and Irina kissed Katya 'goodnight' gently on the cheek before making her way to place the sleeping baby in the Moses basket. Katya paused on the stairs to watch as Irina moved the basket near the beautiful rug in front of the moonlit windows.

Irina sat looking outside and pulled her knees into the meditation position and Katya shook her head, feeling overwhelming sadness for her sister who wasn't afraid of anything except sleep.

Just as Katya reached the landing at the top of the stairs, she noticed Jack staring over the railing at Irina, his arms folded over his bare chest wearing nothing but pajama pants, watching her in wonderment and confusion. His eyes met Katya's trying to understand why Irina would rather meditate in darkness alone than sleep with him in their bed.

Katya placed her hand on Jack's arm and shook her head 'no' slowly, signaling he should leave Irina be and go back to bed. She offered him a small smile and nodded with her head as they both silently made their way back to their respective bedrooms.

Just before dawn, Irina crept back to bed, placing Lena in her bassinet and curling up behind Jack. Jack had felt her slip into bed behind him and pretended to be asleep. He was saddened by the thought she was already sneaking around and whatever was keeping her awake at night Irina didn't feel comfortable sharing it with him. He decided to let her talk about it when she was ready, on her own terms and went back to sleep.

Irina awakened him with a big kiss and a smile a couple of hours later, pulling him out of bed to make breakfast still in their pajamas. To her credit, she seemed utterly happy and Jack said nothing about catching her sneaking out of bed.

Katya had joined them soon after and Irina could hardly wait anymore for Sydney to wake up so she decided to wake her up. As soon as Irina had left the kitchen, Jack and Katya shared a knowing glance that they would not reveal to Irina that Jack had seen her. For whatever reason, Katya was trying to tell him Irina needed her space and so, he would give it to her.


	22. Chapter 22

_**AN: **_**Music for this Chapter (on repeat)**_**: Forever Young **_**by Rod Stewart**_**, I'm Alive **_**by Celine Dion**_**, Wahoo (Song #2) **_**by Blur**_**, She Drives Me Crazy **_**by Fine Young Cannibals**_**, Bitter Pill **_**by Annie Lennox**_**, A Small Measure of Peace **_**by Hans Zimmer from**_** The Last Samurai Soundtrack, Mother of a Mother **_**by Michael Giacchino from the**_** ALIAS Soundtrack**_

* * *

TWENTY-TWO

o

_***Forever Young***_

Irina walked down the hallway, smile on her face, flooded by memories of so many mornings, so long ago when she made the same trek to awaken her sleepy little girl. She gently turned the handle on the door and slipped inside the room. Irina hadn't seen it since the day she'd left Sydney at Ms. Adam's twenty-one years ago. Everything was exactly the same except for a few High School track trophies and medals adorning one of her bookshelves. A poster of _Bon Jovi_ on the back of the door that made Irina giggle softly thinking about Sydney as a teenager as well as the cork board above her desk full of various pictures of 'high bangs' and 'pinned pants.' She lightly grazed her hand over a stack of books she recognized as her own, as well as the First Edition copy of _Alice in Wonderland_ her mother had given her and she had given Sydney. On the top of one dresser were framed photos of Sydney and her friends at various ages as well as two dolls. One Irina remembered giving her for her fifth birthday and another she had never seen.

Sydney was curled up, sleeping on her side and Irina knelt down to watch her daughter, smiling at how much her little girl had changed, and how much she'd stayed the same. She glanced over to the nightstand and tears instantly came to her eyes as she carefully picked up the framed photographs.

The first one was taken just days after Sydney was born. Irina had been rocking her to sleep and fell asleep in the process. The moment captured by Jack, one of her favorite photographs.

The other photo was what Irina recognized to be her last photo taken with Sydney before she left. It had been Halloween and Sydney was dressed up like Cinderella, Irina was a cat. Sydney's little arms holding on to Irina's neck fiercely as Irina knelt beside her, both wearing big smiles as they'd prepared to head out Trick-or-Treating. Carefully, she set them back on the nightstand.

Irina smiled and running her fingers over Sydney's face brushing the hair behind her ear she leaned over and kissed her cheek.

"Sydney," she whispered into her ear with a smile. "Wake up, Cinderella."

Sydney's eyes fluttered open and her face lit into a giant smile seeing her mother smiling back at her. She hugged her pillow tighter and closed her eyes again.

"Maybe I should have called you 'Sleeping Beauty." Irina giggled and sat on the small twin bed next to Sydney, leaning over her with her body, arms on each side, cheek pressed to Sydney's, just like she used to.

Sydney wiggled her arm out from beneath the blankets to embrace Irina, her eyes catching the photos on her nightstand making her smile. 'How many times had she awoken in the morning, looking at those photos wishing for her mother to be the one awakening her just as Irina was doing now?'

"It's a holiday," Sydney spoke, the vibrations tickling Irina's cheek pressed against hers. "I get to sleep in on holidays…a rarity among spies." She laughed, as did her mother.

Irina threaded her fingers with Sydney's, and they lay like that a moment.

"I love you, Sydney." Irina whispered.

"I love you too, Mom." Sydney smiled, feeling so safe suddenly under her mother's protective embrace, even at twenty-seven years old.

"I promised that if I ever got the chance," Irina pulled Sydney into a tighter embrace beneath her, "I would tell you everyday just how much I love you." She kissed her on the temple and pulled away to a sitting position smiling as Sydney moved to sit up, just admiring her daughter. "We should head downstairs. Your father is making you chocolate chip pancakes." Irina smiled and began to get off the bed.

"Mom." Sydney caught her attention and Irina turned back. Sydney looked at her a moment, then launched herself into Irina's arms, holding on to her with all her strength. "I've missed you so much." She whispered into her mother's hair. "I'm so happy you're home."

"Me too, Sweetheart. Me too." Irina rocked with her in a hug for a moment then kissed her head and pulled Sydney to her feet.

They were arm in arm bounding down the steps in smiles and Irina paused at the entertainment center to turn on the CD player. She rifled through the disks and was surprised to find one of her favorites.

"It's mine." Sydney admitted watching her mother. "It has that song on it…the one about saying 'Goodbye to your mother,' so I bought it. "

Irina nodded at her, acknowledging that Sydney had probably bought it after hearing it on the DVD they took from Irina's place in Rio. She placed the disk in the tray and pressed the track number she wanted, hit repeat, turned on the house surround sound, cranked the volume and grabbed Sydney's hand.

_***I'm Alive ***_

Irina smiled and danced her way into the kitchen making Sydney giggle at never having seen her mother like this in her adult life, so happy and silly. She danced over to Katya, kissed her on the cheek and then to Jack, turning his face as he scrambled eggs, to kiss his smiling amused face.

Irina made her way over to the refrigerator and pulled out a small bottle of Insulin and a syringe, still smiling much to the surprise of everyone. She set them down in front of her on the kitchen island where Lena was awake sitting in her Bouncy seat. She pricked her finger, and tested her blood sugar, all eyes on her in fascination while she continued to bounce with the music. Keeping her eyes focused on the baby in front of her, Irina pulled her nightgown up enough on one side to inject herself in the thigh.

Smiling at the three watching her with worry and touched by their concern Irina smiled and shrugged, "I'm alive." Repeating the words of the song, and trying to accept her new lifestyle. She tossed the syringe into the orange box disposal and picked up Lena, holding her to her chest she began dancing around the kitchen with the baby, humming with the song while Jack, Katya and Sydney all watched her with smiles.

The doorbell rang announcing they had visitors.

"That'd be Vaughn and Eric." Sydney smiled as she watched her mother swaying to the music with her sister, side stepping them to get the door.

"Oh good, the boys are here." Irina smiled at Jack who looked annoyed.

"They're here awfully early." Jack grumbled flipping the pancakes.

"You told them early, Jack." Irina reminded him as nuzzled the baby's head against her cheek. "Two more for breakfast, Bristow."

Sydney re-entered the kitchen followed by 'the boys' where they stopped dead in their tracks by the sight of Irina in her nightgown, smiling and dancing with the baby in the kitchen while Jack made pancakes in pajama pants, looking like a completely normal family.

"Good God!" Weiss swallowed hard, having never witnessed this before, feeling like he'd been put through some sort of time warp and was having a hard time breathing seeing Irina in a negligee dancing around. The only evidence she'd been pregnant two weeks ago, the baby in her arms. Her body was already back to its impeccable form and breathtaking.

"Morning boys." Irina smiled and waved at them with the baby's hand as she continued swaying around the kitchen. She continued her dance past them and stopped briefly to kiss Jack as he began pouring the orange juice. "I'm going to grab a robe and you a shirt before we eat." She winked at him and swayed her way with the music out of the kitchen with the baby.

"Orange juice? Coffee?" Jack asked them as they took a seat on the stools around the breakfast bar.

"Coffee." Both answered at the same time, still shaking their heads at the surreal environment they found themselves in.

Irina returned moments later in silky robe that matched her pajamas and tossed Jack a t-shirt. She fastened the baby into the Bouncy Seat again and they all sat down for breakfast.

"Sydney," Irina began when they'd finished and she started clearing dishes, "I know you wanted to stay in today…but if it's okay with you, I would really love to get outside…breathe some fresh air, I've been cooped up so long. Maybe go shopping!" She raised her raised her eyebrows with a delighted smile.

"Mom, shopping on the day after Thanksgiving? Are you nuts?" Sydney helped her load the dishwasher. "The stores will be insane with sales."

"I was thinking of hitting up Beverly Hills." Irina shrugged not thinking about the crazy American obsession with Christmas shopping this day of the year. "I don't have any clothes except for the few articles you and Katya got for me. Which are beautiful by the way," She admired her nightgown smiling, "But I need more."

"Beverly Hills, huh?" Weiss made a whistling noise, still nervous around Irina, as he passed them his utensils. Meshing the images of the assassin they'd held in a glass cell for a year with the images of the mother and wife before him now, were taking some time. "Sounds more fun then Home Depot where we're going." He smiled at her softly.

"Ok, I'm always game for shopping." Sydney smiled realizing she'd never been shopping in Beverly Hills on her CIA salary.

The girls of the house had spent all morning shopping Beverly Hills on Rodeo and in the Beverly Center with Irina buying everything for everyone. They'd all gotten new clothes, shoes, accessories and jewelry, and all of them went nuts in 'Pea in a Pod' baby store finding tons of cute clothes for Lena. Irina also decided that the fourth bedroom upstairs should be converted into Lena's nursery so after calling Jack to make sure it was okay, she went crazy buying stuff to decorate it with Sydney and Katya's help. On their way home Irina made Sydney swing by the Porsche and Mercedes dealerships in Santa Monica, deciding she needed a car, too.

"Mom, you can't be serious." Sydney patted Lena's back watching her mother circling the little Porsche convertible while the salesman looked on. "It's not exactly a family car." She looked down at the baby in her arms thinking about all the stuff one had to tote around with a child.

"You're right, it's not a family car." Irina smiled coming to take the baby from Sydney, "But we'll look for that later." She kissed the baby's head and handed her to Katya. "Katya, would you mind staying here with Lena while Sydney and I take it for test drive?"

Katya saw the mischievous gleam in Irina's eyes, as she took the baby. "Don't get arrested." She smiled speaking in Russian as the confused salesman opened the door for Irina. Sydney looked concerned as Irina got behind the wheel and she hurried to get in the passenger seat, the salesman in the back.

"Buckle up." Irina smiled, revving the engine.

"Mom," Sydney pulled tight on the belt, also seeing her mother was up to something. "Have you driven since-" Sydney switched to Russian to keep the salesman out of the conversation.

"Moscow?" Irina finished for her, "No." She smiled and Sydney looked at her horrified.

"Mom." Sydney gave her a warning look as Irina casually pulled out of the lot headed toward the PCH, Pacific Coast Highway.

_***Wahoo! (Song #2)***_

"Sydney, it will be fine." Irina waggled her eyebrows waiting for the light to turn green.

"So you two are Russian?" The salesman asked lying his arms casually across the back of the super tiny seat, having no idea what he'd just gotten himself in to.

There was no time to answer as Irina floored the little Porsche, squealing the wheels as she tore away.

"Oh shit!" Sydney held onto the door as Irina began zigging and zagging around traffic with inches between bumpers at speeds of 80mph or more.

Irina was smiling madly, loving the freedom and wind in her hair. The surge of adrenaline pumping through her veins reminding her she was alive.

"Oh my God!" The salesman scrambled to put on his seatbelt in the backseat. "This is a 40 mph zone!" He squealed terrified in the backseat at the mercy of this crazy Russian woman driving.

"And?" Irina asked shifting and zinging around a Ferrari.

"You're going over a 100 mph!" He screamed over the wind, holding on for dear life as the ocean and mountains flew by on either side of them.

Irina sped up and smiled as she continued to move the car with amazing speed and agility.

"Red light, red light, red light!" The man screamed as they approached an intersection with a yellow light signaling it was about to turn red and traffic would change.

Irina slammed her foot on the gas and shifted gears, flying through the intersection and narrowly missing a semi-truck and three cars. The salesman in the back was screaming for his life the whole time, the sound drowned out by the wind.

"Oh fuck!" Sydney shouted eyeing a Highway Patrolman coming towards them, lights already flashing and another in the rear-view mirror.

Irina seemed to take it as a challenge. "Hold on." She smiled seeing the turnoff for Mulholland Drive coming up.

"Oh Mom, nonononono!" Sydney squealed as Irina slammed on the brakes cranking the wheel and then slamming on the gas simultaneously, using the extra space to fly around the corner, making a complete 180 degree turn with the two cops almost smashing into each other trying to follow her as she sped away.

"Who the fuck are you, lady? James Bond?" The salesman asked sweating in the backseat, impressed and yet horrified as he watched the patrolmen regroup and hot in the pursuit again.

"This isn't exactly the best way to stay low profile!" Sydney shouted over the roar of the wind as Irina flew through traffic, loving the fact that cars were pulling off the side of the road for her and the police pursuit.

She tore into the car lot squealing her tires around the corner, sliding the car sideways into its parking spot, stopping on a dime.

"Whew! Still got it." Irina smiled, "I'll take it." Happy with herself, she stepped out of the car as the police sirens screamed surrounding the lot.

Sydney jumped out just after, holding up her Department of State badge to the policemen surrounding them with guns trained. "It's ok! I'm a Federal Agent!"

The salesman terrified sat in the backseat holding his arms in the air.

Katya stood inside the store, shaking her head with laughter at the scene outside. Irina had been gone less then ten minutes and already caused enough trouble that the dealership was surrounded by police.

Sydney pulled her mother's arm, forcing Irina by her side as she showed the policeman her badge.

"What the hell were you doing?" The policeman yelled giving the signal for the others to lower their weapons.

"Test driving a car?" Irina smiled and Sydney looked like she wanted to strangle her.

"Mom, you're not helping matters here." Sydney scolded her mother under her breath in Russian.

"Irina, what have you gotten yourself into now?" Katya laughed as she stepped out of the building with the baby seeing as how it was safe now that the police were standing down.

"Irina?" The policeman studied her closely, her name combined with the Russian, setting off alarm bells. "You're the one on TV…aren't you? That lost Russian Tsar."

"I'm not lost." Irina gave him a challenging look.

"Look," Sydney stepped between them. "We're trying to keep her whereabouts a secret from the public."

"Well then, I suggest you don't create a car chase!" The officer looked down at Sydney smugly, feeling as though he were a man and taller, he could somehow intimidate her.

Irina tensed at the sight of the man trying to throw his weight around with Sydney.

"We're sorry for disrupting your afternoon or anyone else's," Sydney stood taller annoyed with the man. "But I assure you," She looked sternly at Irina, who was trying not to smile, "We won't be bothering you again today. And as official Department of State business," She lied flashing her badge again. All well, her father could make it official if need be. "I have to ask you not to speak to anyone about what you saw here today or reveal the whereabouts of this woman to anyone, is that understood?" She glanced at the man's nametag. "Officer Jackson?"

"Yes, ma'am." The officer nodded, and backed away towards his patrol car, signaling the others to leave as well.

"Mom! What the hell was that?" Sydney grabbed Irina's arm turning her towards her with a jerk when the cars had gone.

"It was living a little, Sweetheart." Irina smiled and squeezed her daughter's forearm. "Oh come on, Sydney!" She arched her eyebrows when Sydney still looked disturbed. "You know that was fun. Come on 'pouty pants,' I'll buy you a car." Irina winked taking the baby from Katya as they made there way towards the shaken salesman getting out of the car.

Sydney looked down at the pavement, now scarred with tire marks and shook her head, breaking into a smile as Irina asked, "So what do you have for family style SUVs?"

"What the?" Jack stepped back from the white picket fence they'd just finished wrapping in lights as the parade of new cars parked in the driveway.

Irina jumped out of a new black Mercedes SUV, Sydney out of a metallic silver Audi convertible, Katya out of Irina's little red Porsche and some guy they'd never seen out of a black Mercedes sedan, who waved and then climbed into another car that had followed them before driving away.

"Hello, My Love." Irina glided up to Jack carrying the baby, diaper bag and purse. "The lights look fantastic. Can you get the rest of the bags and bring them in for us? Thank you, My Love." She kissed him on the cheek as she breezed by into the house.

Sydney and Katya followed with big smiles, arms loaded with bags and none of them offering a word of explanation.

Jack looked to an equally stunned Weiss and Vaughn who moved towards the back of the SUV and convertibles to retrieve the bags.

"When she goes shopping, she really goes shopping." Weiss loaded up his arms, admiring the new cars and tons of bags. "Next time, I'm going with her instead of Home Depot with you."

Jack threw him a nasty look as he slammed the car door shut.

_***She Drives Me Crazy ***_

"Irina, Darling," Jack set the bags down and began un-strapping Lena from her car seat. "To whom do all of those cars belong to?"

"Well, I didn't have a car here so we stopped and picked one up." Irina breezed by him again, dropping a quick kiss to both him and the baby as she helped the others in the door.

"One, yes. There are four new vehicles out there." Jack cradled the baby in his arms, watching the whirlwind around him.

"Well, I need one for the family so I got an SUV. I wanted the cute little Porsche for myself and I bought you the little black Mercedes because I love you so much and that giant Lincoln you drive around just isn't sexy, Panama." She threw him a saucy grin as she began digging through bags and Jack shook his head trying not to laugh.

"And the fourth car? The Audi." He reminded her.

"Oh that's mine." Sydney bound down the steps with a smile after taking bags up to her mother's room. "It's Mom's guilt gift after almost having us both arrested this afternoon."

"What?" Jack and Vaughn asked simultaneously earning them a look and a laugh.

"Sydney!" Irina gave her daughter a look for ratting her out. "I bought you that because I love you."

"Mom took the Porsche for a test drive." Sydney offered up, loving to see her mother squirm.

"So most people do when they buy a new car." Weiss added not understanding why that was arrest worthy.

"Yes, but not going over a hundred down the PCH while being chased by five highway patrolman." Sydney smiled as her father's face turned ashen.

"Irina…" Jack turned on her.

"I've still got it." Irina smiled in response, happy with herself as she hadn't driven since the damage to her hand in Moscow months ago.

"What were you thinking?" Jack scolded her, horrified at the thought.

"I was thinking I needed to live a little after everything. I needed to feel that surge of adrenaline to let me know I'm still alive. I had to know…I'm still me." She offered a small smile in apology.

"You're going to drive me crazy woman." Jack sighed, shaking his head he flopped onto the couch. He understood her reasoning but it didn't make him any less worried about her risk taking. Living with 'Irina' was never going to be dull he realized.

"She's really an amazing driver, Dad, you should see her in action." Sydney tried to 'up' the conversation, feeling badly now for trying to make it a joke after finding out Irina's reasoning behind it.

"Thank you, Sweetheart." Irina smiled plopping down in the chair, exhausted.

"Oh, I've seen her in action." Jack tried not to smile, shaking his head at Irina.

Sydney pretended not to hear that comment or the context it was meant to be taken in.

"I think I'm going to start running again tomorrow." Irina smiled, still riding the rush from earlier today, feeling very much alive again and ready for action.

"Irina you just had a baby, not to mention surviving death and you want to go running? Honey, I don't think that's a good idea."

"Yes, I know, Jack." Irina squeezed the exercise ball she's picked up off the coffee table in her hand, working her hand's tendons they'd fixed while she was in the hospital. "That's why I'll start with something short. Only four miles instead of the usual six." She smiled up at him.

Jack slapped his hand against his forehead, leaning back into the couch with a sigh covering his eyes, realizing there was no reasoning with a woman who was unreasonable.

* * *

The next few days passed without incident. Katya had returned home to Italy to spend time with her husband and children, agreeing with Irina that both should stay out of Russia until they could figure something out with Vladimir concerning their now celebrity status.

Jack, Vaughn, Weiss, and Sydney had all returned to work and Irina kept busy with the baby, decorating her nursery, going for runs on the beach and talking with members of her government and the American one, trying to figure out the next move.

Irina was still sneaking out of bed at night when she thought Jack was sleeping, opting instead to meditate rather then face the onslaught of nightmares that seemed to be plaguing her as of late. And every morning she would slide back into bed, unaware Jack knew what she was doing. He still didn't understand her reasoning and the thoughts of 'why,' were now occupying his thoughts during the night and day but he said nothing.

Irina had stepped out one December afternoon, intending to start her run with the baby but was stopped in her tracks by a mass of dozens of red roses waiting for her on the porch. She smiled as she knelt to read the card, instantly thinking of how romantic Jack was.

_'My Dearest Tsarina, I must say I am impressed with your ability to survive death on top of birthing another child by your bastard American husband? You always were a fertile bitch. It took me awhile to realize where you'd be hiding and then it struck me. Where does a whore return to, but the bed she knows best? I'm not bitter at you, Love, for trying to kill me, as I hope you're not bitter with me. It is all part of our glorious game of cat and mouse. Take care of that precious baby, and I'll see you soon. Love, Gerard.'_

Irina crumpled the paper in rage, threw it down and kicked the roses over, scattering them across the porch.

_***Bitter Pill ***_

'I will not let him get to me, I will not let him get to me.' Irina chanted over and over in her head as she strapped Lena into the baby jogger and her feet began pounding the pavement.

'Son-of-a-bitch! Mother-fucking bastard-ass thinks I'm playing a game with him. I'll show you a game when I find your fucking ass!' She ranted in her mind as her feet carried her faster and faster, the hate inside her creating a surge of energy. 'Bitter? God damn fucking right I'm bitter you mother-fucking cocksucker! When I am finished with you…' She continued to boil inside with rage for the man. Irina ran on for almost an hour, significantly more then her four-mile maximum and her lungs began to burn. With her heart pounding in her chest, she decided to head for home as it was almost Lena's feeding time and Jack would be returning from work soon. She rounded the block, headed for home and noticed as three cars began to follow her. She ran harder fearing the worst and noticed it wasn't thugs out to nab her but men with cameras.

The paparazzi had found her and continued to snap pictures of her and Lena as she ran full speed towards home. When she was two blocks away, a man jumped out in front of her from behind a tree with a camera in her face and she had to swerve to avoid hitting him, though on her way by, she threw her elbow and he landed on the other side of the bushes. She reached the driveway, with now a mass of cameras flashing behind her and as soon as she hit the sidewalk stopped the jogger stroller pulled Lena out, shielding her from the bright flashes. She tore up the sidewalk and almost ran smack into Jack sitting on the steps, holding a rose and the crumpled paper in his hand.

"We have a problem." She sighed, out of breath, sweat soaked curls framing her face where they fell from her ponytail.

"I see that." Jack looked from the note to the mass of photographers accumulating outside the white picket fence. He reached out and guided her into the house, away from the people snapping their pictures furiously.

"When did this arrive?" Jack fingered the note as Irina sat Lena in the Bouncy seat and grabbed a glass of water. He took a seat on the stool in front of her, feeling the anger inside him rising now that his fear had subsided.

"It was waiting for me when I went out this afternoon. I don't know when it arrived. They didn't ring the bell." She sighed, her back to him as she poured another glass of water, hanging her shoulders in defeat.

"Why didn't you call me right away?" Jack tried his best not to yell at her. "I was scared to death when I got home and found it that way. Thought you were kidnapped again until I noticed the jogger and your running shoes were gone."

"I didn't think to in the moment. I just wanted to run." Irina answered, still with her back to him. "I needed to clear my head. I'm sorry if I worried you, but I thought I would be back before you got home."

Jack's demeanor softened seeing she was obviously upset by the note and now the damn photographers. He noticed her body was visibly shaking and his worry took over once again.

"Irina, how long have you been running?" He jumped off the stool and forced her to look at him, feeling her body tremble beneath his grasp. Her pale complexion alarmed him.

"I don't know…I lost count." She continued to tremble uncontrollably.

"Sit down." He guided her over to the breakfast stool afraid she was about to pass out. "When's the last time you checked your blood sugar?" He grabbed her kit off the counter.

"A few hours ago, I guess. It was okay before I left." She felt her world begin to spin. Jack pricked her finger and smeared her blood on the stick for the meter reading.

_***Bad Day ***_

"Oh God, Irina." Jack flew to the fridge grabbing a jug of orange juice. "Start drinking! You're so low you're barely reading."

"I need a glass." She noted as Jack lifted the juice towards her lips.

"You don't need a damn glass! Just start drinking!" He commanded. "Goddamnit, Irina! You have to be careful! You can't just go running like that and do whatever you want anymore!" He continued to rant as she began drinking directly from the jug. "You have to take care of yourself or you'll end up in a diabetic coma for Christ-sake!"

Irina took one last swig of juice then set the jug softly on the counter, Jack so busy ranting he missed the look of sadness that flashed across her face. She slowly got up off the stool and reached for the baby who began fussing from hunger.

"What do you think you're doing?" Jack grabbed her arm, stopping her from extracting the baby.

"I'm going to feed her, Jack, she's hungry." Irina cocked her head annoyed but didn't look at him.

"No." He pulled Lena from the Bouncy seat, "You're not. Your blood sugar is too low right now and you need to give your body a minute to adjust." He moved around Irina, still standing helplessly in front of the kitchen island, to get a bag of milk out of the freezer. "Go take a shower, we'll be fine." He filled a pan with water and set it on the stove, getting ready to make Lena a bottle.

Irina watched silently for a moment, grabbed the crumpled note and slowly made her way up the stairs, stopping only to draw the shades in the living room so reporters couldn't see in.

She tore off her clothes and pulled out her ponytail, as she made her way into the bathroom. Reaching for the shower handle and instead turned around, opting for a bath. As the water filled the big claw-foot tub, Irina read Cuvee's note once more…the anger she felt earlier now replaced by an overwhelming urge to cry and disappear. Today was a very bad day… Finding this note, the paparazzi chase and then Jack yelling at her, treating her like a child. She climbed into the steaming hot water and read and re-read the note multiple times, tears coming to her eyes at the memories Cuvee's words were bringing back to her. Finally having had enough, she slid down into the tub, the water covering her head; she let the note fall from her hand and drop over the side of the tub to the floor.

When she re-emerged a couple of minutes later, Jack was sitting on the closed toilet seat, holding a naked baby, note in hand, looking at her sadly. Without words he silently handed her the baby in the tub.

Irina said nothing but watched as her tiny ravenous daughter latched on and began eating, both comforted by the contact and warm water surrounding them.

"I'm sorry." Jack looked sadly at his wife and child, who looked so at peace together. "I was being an ass. I shouldn't have yelled at you or treated you like a child. I know you're trying and this is just as new to you as it is to me."

"It's ok." She said softly, raking her wet fingers through Lena's hair without looking up.

"No it's not ok." Jack crumpled the note up and threw it in the trash, moving closer to the tub. "I was angry at the situation with Cuvee and terrified for you when I saw how pale you were." He reached up and ran his thumb over her cheek now full of color. "I didn't mean to accuse of you of being negligent. Irina, I am just terrified to lose you again." He admitted turning her chin to look at him. "If anything ever happened to you again…" He swallowed the rest, not wanting to think about it. "I can't begin to imagine how insane this must be for you-"

"It's ok, Jack." She offered a small smile in understanding and cutting him off from any further comments about Cuvee.

He nodded, seeing she didn't want to talk about the details right now.

"Why is it that you're always apologizing to me when I'm in the bathtub?" She smiled, teasing him remembering a similar apology in St. Petersburg.

"Maybe because I'm in insensitive-ass who can't resist a beautiful woman in a tub?" He offered a smile, still trying to apologize. "What can I do to make it up to you?"

"Ah…" Irina ran her wet fingers over the curve of his jaw pretending to think. "You can strip down and climb in here with us. I would really just love to be in your arms right now." She added softly.

"Done." Jack stood and began stripping off his suit.

Irina leaned forward and Jack slipped into the tub behind her and the baby. His arms wrapping around her as she leaned back against him; still nursing the baby.

"I love you." He rested his cheek against her wet hair, pulling her tighter to him.

"I know." She cupped the warm water in her hand and ran it over their baby. "And I love you."

When they all left the tub a half hour later, Jack called Kendall and informed him of Cuvee's little gift as well as the paparazzi mess now camped out in front of his lawn.

Kendall in turn, called the State Department, informing them of the situation and had Diplomatic Security Service sent over immediately to guard the house and block off the paparazzi from coming anywhere near a five block radius.

Irina had called Vladimir and Katya informing them that she'd been found by the paparazzi, leaving out the part about Cuvee from Katya. Vladimir had dispatched a private security detail until she could make it back to Russia. They would arrive in the morning.

Sydney called panicked an hour later, having seen news footage of her mother running with the baby on the 9 o'clock news. Once Jack calmed her down, after she insisted coming over hearing about the added bonus of Cuvee's note, he and Irina lay down for the night, exhausted.

Irina had been so tired, she actually fell asleep before Jack did and he took the opportunity to lock her into his embrace, trapping her under his weight; hoping to stop any attempt she may make in the night to escape.

* * *

**_*A Small Measure of Peace (Kashmir Theme) *_**

_Cuvee's mouth began its descent down Irina's chest, her arms and legs handcuffed to the metal bed frame in his office. _

_ "See Irina," Cuvee leered at her looking up from where his tongue was assaulting her breasts, lying naked and heavy on top of her "You try to deny it, but even your body betrays your true cravings." He ran his thumbs over her erect nipples. _

_ "It's freezing in here, you Son-of-a-bitch!" She spat at him and he slapped her hard, drawing blood from her nose and the corner of her mouth, roughly grabbing her face and kissing it hard. _

_ Cuvee grabbed her hips and thrust himself into her, not caring at all as she bit her lip to keep from crying out in pain as she wasn't ready for him at all, the lubrication he was soon pumping with not natural, but blood from his rough pounding into her, tearing her apart and ripping open old tears that hadn't yet had a chance to heal from the last session of assault. _

_ When he finished, his sweat soaked body collapsed onto hers, still chained to the bed. He tried to kiss her face again but she turned away from him, choosing to look at the wall, while he kissed his way down her body. _

_ "Not again." He sighed heavily, shaking his head when he reached her abdomen. Running his hand over the soft curvature of her flesh slightly extended and firm to the touch. "God Bless you, if you are mine." He kissed her belly and Irina's eyes flashed to his, knowing exactly what he was about to do. He pulled himself off of her and began pulling on his pants. _

_ As with the previous times, she wanted to scream out, 'No don't do it! You sonofabitch!' Remembering the pain and feelings of guilt she'd gone through before, but as with them, she remained silent. Tears in her eyes, feeling guilty for 'wanting' him to rid her body of any evidence and reminder of her rape as well, sharing in the knowledge that no one, at that point, knew who was the father, as many were possible candidates._

_ "You are one fertile bitch!" He looked back at her, grabbing his shirt and flinging open his office door, commanding orders at the officers outside._

_ The two raced in and un-cuffed Irina from the bed, holding a gun on her the entire time leering at her naked form and watching her get dressed, like always._

_ She knew this routine all too well and held her hands out to be re-cuffed. As soon as the guard was finished, the other shoved her violently towards the door. Irina's glaring eyes never leaving Cuvee's as she passed. They marched her down to the first platform of steps and Irina closed her eyes, waiting… and then it came, the violent kick to her back that sent her flying down the stairs. She landed at the bottom and curled into a ball immediately as her abdomen began cramping, signaling another miscarriage of an unwanted baby. The guards met her on the landing and proceeded to kick her relentlessly in the abdomen until they saw the blood. Her last vision, always Cuvee standing at the top of the steps with his clothes half on, before she passed out. She'd awaken in her cell hours later, dried and fresh blood covering the lower half of her body, pasting her clothes to her flesh as the intense tremors bolted through her system from the severe cramping. A leg, usually an arm, would be broken or dislocated from the fall, as well as a few fractured ribs, but after awhile the pain usually became numb with blood loss and she could no longer feel it. Curling up on the cold, cement floor, in her own puddle of blood, Irina closed her eyes and wished for the day that one of those falls would kill her. They would give her five days to recover before they would return again to ravage her body, starting the whole process over again. _

_ They had her stripped naked, sprawled face down, bent over Cuvee's desk, handcuffed to the brackets he made special for just such occasion. Once again she could feel his hot breath on her face as he leaned over her, watching from his chair._

_ "Try not to get knocked up again, you fertile bitch!" He laughed and lit a cigar as his officers stripped down preparing to have a round with her._

_ "I will kill you, you son-of-a-bitch. I will kill you, Gerard!" Irina promised, as hot tears stung the cuts on her cheeks as the first officer thrust into her from behind._

Jack had been awakened sometime earlier by Irina's thrashing in her sleep under him and when he flicked the lamp on the nightstand on, he could see she was dreaming. Not dreaming, but having a nightmare as her face was stained with tears. He'd been afraid to wake her in such a startled state, so he watched helplessly as she went through her silent hell; the pain clearly written across her face while she slept.

Jack was startled when she spoke her last 'promise' to kill out loud and confirmed for him what was tormenting her so, 'Cuvee.' He couldn't let her go through that again, so he shook her slightly, preparing himself for any attack she might throw up coming out of such state.

"Irina," He called out softly, "Sweetheart, wake up. You're dreaming."

At that same moment the baby began crying and Irina flew out of bed, hearing the cry and not Jack's plea, responding instinctively to her daughter's cries of hunger. She gathered up the baby intending to go downstairs and stopped dead in her tracks when she turned and found Jack sitting up staring at her.

"I'll take her downstairs so you can go back to sleep." She whispered, giving him a small forced smile in the darkness, having no idea he'd been awake this whole time. She grabbed another blanket and headed for the door.

"Irina, wait..." Jack flew out of bed and took her arm gently. "We need to talk." His eyes full of sadness as he reached up to dry her tear trails. The look in his eyes letting her know he had an idea of what she'd been dreaming about.

"Not right now, Jack." She moved around him to get to the door.

"Please…why are you shutting me out?" He sighed. "Every night since you've been home you wait until you think I'm sleeping and then go downstairs and meditate instead of sleeping with me."

Irina's eyes darted to his. She wanted to accuse him of spying on her, but under the circumstances he had every right.

"I've been hoping that you'd come to me in your own time, tell me why you'd rather meditate on the floor downstairs than sleep in my arms…but you haven't." He backed up and sat on the bed while she remained at the door. "And tonight you were dreaming. You were having a nightmare. This is about Kashmir, isn't it?"

"Jack," Irina began and turned towards the door again, not wanting him to see her crying this way. "Please…I'm begging you." She choked out, "Not right now." She opened the door and vanished into the darkness of the hallway, leaving Jack sitting on the side of the bed.

For the next two hours, Jack sat on the side of the bed, waiting for her to return, this was a conversation they couldn't put off any longer. His mind began racing with the images from Irina's Kashmir tapes and wondered if the horror on there was only the beginning. Every time he'd try to bring up the subject, she's sidestep the conversation and switch topics or tell him 'not right now' or 'later.' He thought back to the day when they'd first watched the tapes in the conference room and he'd told Sydney that her mother was a 'master at compartmentalizing' for having to work with Cuvee again.

The problem with compartmentalizing is that you never deal with a problem; you just lock it up and throw away the key, hoping it never surfaces again. But after time, the weight of carrying it around begins to eat away at you, bubbling to the surface again as you violently try to shove it back into that little compartment way down deep. Irina, he just realized, had probably never dealt with what happened to her. Never sought counseling, and certainly never talked to anyone about it…she'd been keeping it inside her for twenty years, trying to deal with it on her own as she did with everything else in her life. He began to wonder if her nightmares were the reason behind her choosing to meditate rather then sleep. He'd seen her do it almost every night and day she was in custody when she turned herself in the first time to the CIA.

He was in the middle of this line of thought when the door slowly opened and Irina stopped, startled to see him sitting in the exact place she'd left him two hours prior. She met his eyes, and then shifted the sleeping baby, moving to lay her in the bassinet.

"Irina…" He began softly.

"What do you want me to say, Jack?" She stood in front of the window looking out, the furthest distance away from him she could possibly get.

"I want you to tell me about your nightmare." He swallowed hard, knowing he was pushing her away.

"Why?" She wrapped her arms around her chest, "So that you can have nightmares and neither one of us can sleep? There is no point in telling you, Jack. I'll be fine. I can handle it. I've handle it for twenty years on my own."

"But you're not alone anymore and you don't have to handle it on your own." He got up off the bed and moved behind her in front of the window, speaking slowly. "Please, I love you and I want to help you. I hurt when you hurt. Please just tell me. The nightmares…Are they the reason you'd rather meditate?"

Irina remained silent as Jack wrapped his arms tighter around her shoulders.

"Yes." She breathed out in a shaky voice, offering him only this small bit of truth.

Jack nodded and closed his eyes, inhaling the scent of her hair pressed against his cheek.

"Tell me about the one tonight." He spoke softly.

"Jack, believe me. You don' t want to hear it." She closed her eyes as a single tear ran down her cheek.

"Irina, what are you afraid will happen if you tell me?" Jack ran his thumb over the smooth skin on her shoulder.

"That if I let out a small piece it will all come out and I won't be able to control it, to handle it, and have a nervous breakdown or worse…that you'll never want to touch me again." She added softly with tears in her eyes, admitting her true fears.

Jack felt like he'd been punched in the stomach. He turned her slowly in his arms, tilting her chin to his face.

"Irina, I love you. This isn't your fault it isn't your doing. You did nothing wrong and no matter what you tell me. I am still going to love you, still going to want you because you're, my everything. We've made it through so much we will make it through this, too. But you've got to let me help. Please." He ran his thumbs over her cheeks wiping the tears.

"I just need some time, Jack, please understand. It's not you. I love you, but this is about me, and dealing with my own demons. Please, I just ask that you give me a little more time. " She placed her palms on his bare chest, keeping her head down, not wanting to look him in the eyes.

"Ok," He pulled her into his chest, wrapping his arms around her and resting his chin on her head, "I'll give you more time but Irina, if you don't want to talk to me please talk to someone when you're ready."

She nodded slightly into his chest and he took her by the hand and led her back to bed, curling up to get some remnants of sleep before the sun came up.

* * *

"Hello." Jack greeted the tall muscular blonde man who stood outside the door when he was leaving for work. "And who are you?" He looked around at the numerous men and women wearing black suits and sunglasses placed around his house and on the street.

"We are Russian security detail for Tsarina." The man answered in English with a thick Russian accent. "My name is Yuriy and I am head of security detail. You can come to me with any comments our concerns."

"Well, hello, Yuriy." Jack extended his hand, remembering Irina mentioning something about Putin sending in re-enforcements. "My name is Jack."

"Yes, I know." The man nodded answering shortly, and shook his hand before returning to his stoic pose. "Have a good day at work, Mr. Bristow."

Jack looked at the big Russian man curiously and then to the group amassed to protect Irina…Russian and American security forces working side by side. He shook his head at the irony and left for work.

"Jack," Kendall approached him the minute he stepped out of his office. "Senator Douglas is being transferred here within the hour."

"Why? How is his arrest relevant to the CIA, other then the fact I would love to have a crack at that son-of-a-bitch?" Jack fumed thinking about the man sentencing Irina to die.

"Well, here's the relevant part," Kendall raised his eyebrows, shifting his weight, hands on hips. "In investigating Senator Douglas, the FBI found a money transfer totaling $3 million dollars into the good Senators account the same day he handed down Irina's execution sentence."

"Son-of-a-bitch!" Jack seethed throwing his file on to the desk. "He was paid to execute her!"

"Well," Kendall looked solemnly at Jack remembering very vividly Irina's execution. "It only gets worse. He was taken to Camp Harris where he's been interrogated and after two hours, began spilling the beans in an attempt to work out a plea agreement. He confessed the name of his bankroller." He paused, "Arvin Sloane."

Jack's anger rising inside, too angry to speak thinking back to the flowers and note Sloane had sent to the house, giving his 'condolences on Irina's death' when the motherfucker had been the one responsible.

"He wants Irina dead so she can't stop the Prophecy." Jack realized.

"It would seem that way." Kendall agreed.

"She's the only one who can stop him. We need to bring her in." He began heading towards his office to call Irina.

"Jack, what the hell are you talking about?" Kendall followed, thinking that bringing Irina Derevko anywhere near this place again was a bad idea.

"Dad, what's going on?" Sydney and Vaughn came up behind them.

"Sloane paid Senator Douglas $3 million dollars to deliver your mother's execution sentence." Jack paused momentarily to relay the information.

"My God! That evil bastard!" Sydney was taken back by the revelation.

"Irina has Diplomatic Immunity now and we need her help." Jack looked to Kendall, "She agreed to cooperate with us on anything related to Sloane in a joint effort with Russia to bring him down." He picked up the phone to make the call, "Do you know where the money was transferred through?" He paused with his fingers above the keypad.

"Jakarta." Kendall answered and Jack's eyes lit up.

"Irina's old contact, Zamir Allyahawa the Saudi born nationalist with ties to Al-Qaeda, made a money transfer with Sloane out of Jakarta. She was going to help us contact him before her Execution Order was given. If we can somehow link the two-"

"Do it. Bring her in." Kendall waved his permission and walked out of the office feeling they might be on to something. "I'll call Washington and get Clearance."

"Hello, Jack, is anything wrong?" Irina answered the other end of the line, worried as he was calling on their private line.

"Irina, we need your help. It's about Sloane. I need you to come into the office." Jack rambled on nervously.

"Jack, the CIA?" Irina fidgeted nervously, thinking about going back to the place that kept her prisoner for so long.

"Yes, I'll come home and get you." He could hear the nervousness in her tone, "I'm leaving right now I'll be there soon. I love you." He added softly onto the end and made Sydney smile, still standing in the doorway.

"Ok. I love you, too." Irina answered hanging up.

"We better go change." Irina smiled softly at the baby staring up at her, following the sound of her mother's voice and shadow with her eyes now.

"Hey, did you see this?" Weiss sat on the edge of Sydney's desk, throwing down the LA Times, US Weekly and People Magazine. Irina's pictures were covering all of them. The one they were flashing on the television screen now accompanied by a series of photographs, takes of her and Lena while on their run only yesterday.

"God, they're fast." Sydney scanned the various covers and flipped through the pages to see more photographs of her mother and Katya as well as the Romanovs.

"Personally, this is my favorite." Weiss laughed showing her the picture in US Weekly of Irina elbowing a photographer and sending him flying backwards over the bushes.

Sydney laughed out loud, "Yep, that's my mom." She smiled proudly.

"So, Mike said that Washington cleared your Mom and she's coming in." He grew more serious.

"Yeah, my dad went home to get her. They should be here any minute." She threw the paper and magazines in the trash.

The last thing she wanted to happen was having everyone gossiping about her mother's press coverage while Irina was there to help. The gossip from the tapes was bad enough, now that practically everyone in Ops had seen them after the Department of Justice ordered them to scan every face in the Kashmir prison, looking for any other possible matches of KGB spies; not just the ones Irina was accused of killing.

Jack had picked Irina and the baby up, leaving behind her security detail, fooling the press she was still at home, and under orders from the D.O.J., Irina had to be blindfolded the entire way to Ops so she couldn't tell where it was located. As soon as they stepped inside the main doors, Jack removed her blindfold and handed her the baby.

Irina looked stunning in a black suit, much like the one she had worn the day she turned herself in. The baby looked angelic in Irina's arms, her soft black hair contrasting sharply with the white dress outfit and satin blankets she was wrapped in.

Jack and three security personnel walked Irina through a series of corridors and finally they entered the Ops center.

_***Mother of a Mother***_

All activity ceased in awe at the sight before them. This was the first time they were seeing Irina Derevko, without her prison blue attire, without the shackles and armed guards. The same woman in the tapes they'd seen countless times now. The last time any of them had seen her, she was being carted away to her death and now she stood before them looking regal and poised, an equal. Not even an equal but above them as a Russian Diplomat and Tsar of the largest country in the world. The irony of it all, captivating.

"Mom." Sydney smiled greeting her mother with a big hug and placed a kiss on her sister's forehead while everyone watched.

"Did dad fill you in on Sloane?" She asked running her hand through Lena's hair.

"Yes, in the car." Irina looked around at all the staring faces, catching Kendall as he approached.

"Ms. Derevko." Kendall nodded at her, offering a small smile. "Well, this is certainly a turn of events." He paused when she continued to stare at him, not finding it funny. "We appreciate the help." He offered his thanks, and a small smile that Irina returned, letting him off the hook.

"Hello." Marshall came running over. "Umm…Ms. Derevko? How are you feeling?" He asked nervously and truly concerned, the last time he'd seen her in the hospital.

"Much better, Marshall," Irina smiled at him, "Thank you for asking."

"She gets more beautiful everyday…you and Syd are so …she's bound to be awesome." He smiled at the baby, lifting her small fingers with his and Irina smiled at him again, really liking this bumbling man.

"Shall we get started?" Kendall motioned for them to move towards the computer they had set up for Irina to work from.

Irina looked up to the monitors just above her head. The cell, which used to feature 'Irina LIVE,' now was a continuous stream of Senator Douglas, once again reminding Irina they really had been watching her every movement twenty-four hours a day.

"I should start by asking to see everything you've accumulated on Sloane in the last year, so I can compare it with what I know." Irina got right to business taking a seat in the chair behind the desk.

"Of course." Jack smiled, loving that he was working with Irina again. Seeing her brain working was almost as fascinating as the other talents she had. He shot Agent McCarthy a look, indicating he should get copies for Irina.

"Right on it, Agent Bristow." The man nodded and flew off to locate the material.

"What else?" Jack leaned down onto the desk as Vaughn brought over the Moses basket for Irina to lay the baby in.

"You said both Zamir and Senator Douglas received payments through a bank in Jakarta?" She paused waiting for Jack to nod 'yes.' "I need both financial records of those transactions, as well as for the World Bank in Kuala Lumpur around the same time."

"Why?" Kendall asked curiously, not accusing her but in wonder.

"Zamir favors the World Bank because it's host to hundreds of illegal account holders worth millions and doesn't ask questions. If he was the one behind Senator Douglas's money transfer, Sloane undoubtedly routed it through the bank in Kuala Lumpur to Zamir first." Irina's mind was turning, happy to be back in the action. "And if he is, we can possibly run a trace back to where the original source of funds came from…Sloane."

Sydney was seeing where her mother was going. "I'll try to get the records of every transaction on both those days." Vaughn smiled at Sydney and nodded at Jack and Irina before he took off.

"How are you going to contact Zamir?" Jack asked curiously.

"Well, that's the difficult part." Irina sighed, pushing her hair behind her ear in a move that made Dixon smile at Sydney, seeing now where she got 'her thing.'

"I burned my bridges with him over the nuclear silo, but if I can put word out that I am looking for him to do business…he'll come back. I have what he needs and can't get elsewhere." She looked up the group, all of them realizing what she meant.

The United States and Russia were the world's leading super powers in weaponry, bombs, and other explosives and with the U.S being completely inaccessible at the moment, Russia became the terrorist world's superstore,' having everything the US did, everything a terrorist could want.

Irina, for the most part, had been trying to stop the illegal sales and flow of old Soviet planes, weapons and bombs out of her country to terrorist groups for the last couple of years.

"I'm going to try and contact a mutual contact of ours and plant the message."

"How's your currently celebrity status going to affect this?" Kendall asked the question they all wanted to know. "People knowing who you really are?"

"The fact that it's out means nothing." She shifted the baby in her arms, "My associates knew of the power I held within the Russian government before all this circus started. " She answered honestly, surprising everyone. "If anything it will only help because they'll want me, 'Russia,' to side with them in their 'war against the US,' especially now that its common knowledge in 'our world' that the US tried, and almost successfully had me executed…They'll be expecting me to take some form of revenge on this country." Seeing the tense faces, she smiled, adding, "Of course, they would have no idea that Russia was…is, really helping the US to bring them down."

Jack smiled back at her, "Anything else you need?"

"Yes, I would love a cup of coffee." Irina smiled, patting the baby's back, lying against her chest.

"I'll get right on it." Agent Crane smiled at Irina, having liked this woman from the first moment they'd met. The memory of Irina refusing to answer her questions for two hours when they first interrogated her last year upon her arrival at the CIA still made her smile in memory. "Black, no sugar, no cream, right?"

"Yes." Irina offered a small smile at the young woman. "What are you going to do?" She looked to Jack, sitting on her desk.

"I'm going to 'question' Senator Douglas." He looked up at the monitor, watching the Senator sitting on the bunk. "I'll be back in few hours."

"I'm going hit the gym with the guys later," Sydney squatted near her mother, Lena wrapping her tiny fingers around hers'. "You can join me if you want." She looked sincerely at her mother, thinking that training with her could be fun. "I know you haven't been able to workout since the paparazzi discovered you."

"Are you serious?" She looked at her funny, the transition from prisoner with 15 minutes on the exercise roof and armed guards, to sparring partner inside the CIA's gym with their agents taking her back a little.

Jack looked to Kendall who shrugged as if to say, sarcastically, 'Why the hell not, she's here with access to our Intel anyway might as well throw in the gym and make it a full membership.'

"Yeah, what the hell. Go ahead," Kendall finally said. "You might as well train here if you're going out in the field with us."

Jack's face was a look of total surprise at the thought, having not realized that once Irina set up the meet, she would actually be going out in the field to do the work. Visions of her in action in Bangkok floated through his mind.

"I don't have any clothes with me." She looked from Kendall to Sydney and Jack.

"Wardrobe will accomodate you." He smiled leaning over to stroke the baby's head with his hand. "I'll see you in a few hours."

She nodded and watched him disappear behind the big steel doors that led to the holding cells.

The monitors went to black and a chill ran through her spine knowing Jack was about to go torture the man, not that he didn't deserve it.

Irina, Sydney, Vaughn, Weiss and Dixon worked for a couple of hours, moving to the conference room so they could spread out the documents and bounce ideas off each other without disturbing the rest of Ops; Lena, sleeping peacefully in her basket at the far end of the room, but never out of the reach of Irina.

"I'm going to get some more coffee. You guys want some more?" Vaughn stood stretching.

"Yeah lets take a short break, I need to get a sandwich or something to munch on." Sydney stood dropping her pen on the table. "Mom, do you need anything?"

"Just point me in the direction of the restroom, please." She scooped up the baby. "I need to take my insulin."

"I'll take Lena and show you where it is." She smiled, taking the baby from her mother with a smile, thoroughly enjoying her little sister whenever she had to chance.

It was on the way back from the bathroom that Irina happened to glance over at a couple of the monitors as she passed and what she saw made her heart feel as though it had stopped. Two agents with headphones on were watching the tapes of her time in Kashmir, searching for any other recognizable faces, but Irina stood transfixed as the image of her body being stripped and raped played across the monitors.


	23. Chapter 23

_**AN: Here is your tissue WARNING: **_**A portion of t****his is a deeply emotional chapter. Necessary for understanding, but tragic. **

**Music for this chapter (on repeat): ****_A Small Measure of Peace by Hans Zimmer, Breathe Me by Sia, Crawling in My Skin _by Linkin Park_, ___****Malleus Mareficarum** by Hans Zimmer, Never Grow Old by The Cranberries

* * *

TWENTY-THREE

o

**_*A Small Measure of Peace (Kashmir Theme)*_**

Irina had only ever seen the images in her mind, not from such a cinematic prospective watching the Kashmir Files on the computer screen. Tears and old feelings immediately exploding to the surface as she watched the men rape her, cutting back to her facial reactions and then to the screaming prisoners.

"Mom…" Sydney had just left the break room with the baby and the guys when she saw Irina standing completely still behind an agent, her eyes transfixed on the screen.

The closer Sydney got, she realized what exactly Irina was staring at and she quickened her pace. "Mom." She spoke softly and reached out to grab her arm, noticing the far off look in her mother's eyes and the trails of tears falling from her cheeks.

The other agents, including the one sitting at the desk with the headphones, became alerted to the situation and all stood, eyes on Irina.

"Oh shit…I'm so sorry." The young agent scrambled trying to stop the footage and finally the screen went back, bleeping to the screensaver of the CIA logo.

Irina seemed to snap out of wherever she was and looked around to all the people staring at her, sadness in all their eyes…and then if finally registered, they'd all seen that tape, they all knew what happened to her. With blurry, furious, sad eyes she turned to Sydney, looking at her momentarily before she took Lena and headed for Jack's office, the place of privacy they told her she could feed Lena in.

"Mom, wait!" Sydney tried to catch up with Irina's pace without running, everyone including Kendall, watching the display. "Mom, please," Sydney begged with tears in her eyes as Irina paced the back of Jack's office like a caged lion.

"How many people, Sydney?" Her breathing quickened, "How many people out there have seen those tapes?" She asked already knowing in her heart the answer.

"Everyone." Sydney admitted sadly and Irina slumped into Jack's chair, turning it and refusing to look at her oldest daughter as the tears came more steadily. "They're under orders to scan the prisoners for face recognition." Sydney offered up, feeling very much like a little girl who disappointed her mommy and let her down.

"So they just all sit around, watching me naked…being raped and tortured all day?" Irina's voice was cracking and she spoke barely above a whisper.

"No, Mom." Sydney rushed to her mother's side, kneeling in front of her feet, not knowing what else to say.

"I want to see my file, Sydney…and the tapes. Right now." Irina turned her face away from Sydney, too ashamed to look at her. "I want to see what everyone else has apparently seen."

"Mom…" Sydney's voice quivered, not thinking this was a good idea and wishing her father wasn't locked away right now in the middle of an interrogation.

"Right now, Sydney!" Irina's voiced commanded.

Sydney wiped her tears slowly and backed away from her mother, turning to walk out the door she saw Kendall in the doorway, his facial features fallen having heard the exchange. He nodded at Sydney and they went to get the files and tapes.

When they returned minutes later, Irina was nursing Lena and still looking off into space at the wall, anywhere but at them.

_***Breathe Me***_

Silently, Sydney linked the videos to Jack's computer and set the file in the middle of the desk, intent on staying until Irina spoke.

"Alone please." Irina finally looked at Sydney, "Please?"

The pleading in her eyes too much for Sydney and she reluctantly nodded and left the room closing it behind her.

As soon as the door was closed, Irina stared at the massive folder in front of her. She hesitantly opened to the first page and tears came to her eyes again at seeing her impossibly young, innocent face staring back.

So young and naïve, the KGB had taken her innocence and talents and exploited them. She flipped through the first few pages, pausing to read and scan photographs taken of her during her teenage years without her knowledge. They'd documented everything. She saw the pictures from the academy and her training and then felt her heartstrings tug when she turned the page and Jack's face stared back; her target; her assignment. He man who would forever change the course of her life. She placed a now sleeping Lena in the basket and kissed her daughter softly, reveling in her newness, her innocence and hoping she would keep it as long as possible. She turned the page and saw the first photo of their documented life together.

Irina was shaking already and knew if she was going to get through the file and the tapes…she needed something to calm her nerves. Remembering Jack always kept a bottle of whiskey in his desk drawer at home, she ventured a bet he'd have one at work too. On the second drawer she pulled open, she found it, buried way down at the bottom under a false bottom. Taking off the cap and downing a sizeable swig, she set the bottle down and read on. Her heart growing tighter as she found the picture of a newborn Sydney staring back, the realization that they were documenting her infant daughter as a means of manipulation against Irina if need be. She flipped faster and faster through the file, the anger rising, inside her as each photo passed.

She saw the log kept while she was in Kashmir and took another big swig, feeling her eyes burn as she read the word on the pages. She slammed the file shut and pushed play, bracing herself for the footage to visually play out what was already ingrained forever into her memory.

Everyone outside in the Ops area, staring hopelessly at the closed door of Jack's office for the entire hour and a half she'd been in there, waiting for any signs.

* * *

Jack had been interrogating Senator Douglas for the last few hours when he really started to lose his patience with the man. He'd told them what he knew, but Jack still wasn't satisfied.

"What do you think you're doing?" Senator Douglas asked seeing Jack place his hand in a vice. "I've answered all your questions, Bristow!"

"You voted 'yes' on the Patriot Act didn't you, Senator Douglas?" Jack removed his tie and rolled up his sleeves.

"Yes, yes of course I did!" He spat out panicked as Jack twisted one of the man's arms behind his back. "What are you doing? You're insane Bristow!"

"The Patriot Act is supposed to help our country deal with terrorists. You voted on it to protect our citizens and then you went and made deals with a terrorist." Jack seethed in anger.

"You slept with one, impregnating her! I don't think you're in any position to judge me, Bristow!" The man spat out and then winced when Jack continued to pull his arm higher behind his back.

"My wife," Jack emphasized, "Was almost killed by Lethal Injection because of you! Do you know what that felt like for her? For my daughters and I to have to watch as her body filled with poison?" Jack yanked hard, and the Senator screamed, Jack had effectively dislocated and broke the Senator's arm and shoulder.

"You son-of-a-bitch!" The Senator screamed at him as Jack pulled out a syringe.

"Irina said it felt like fire in her veins." Jack stabbed the Senator in the arm with the needle, emptying the syringe. "Does it feel like fire, Senator?"

"Oh…you're crazy!" Senator Douglas winced and squirmed as the potassium coursed through his veins, burning like an inferno inside his body. "You can't do this! It's murder!"

"Yes, a concept you are familiar with." Jack cranked the vice and squeezed the Senator's hand making him scream out in pain. "I've only given you enough to feel the burn, nothing near the dosage they gave my wife." Jack cranked the vice harder as the sounds of bones crunching filled the air. "No, I won't kill you, Senator…but I will guarantee you that I will leave you with a permanent defect," He cranked it further, "As your Execution has left Irina with. Something to remind you daily," And again he cranked it, "As it does her…of your poor choices in life." The Senator screamed as Jack cranked the vice as hard as he could.

* * *

"Has anybody gotten word to my dad?" Sydney looked up at the clock, wondering for the millionth time that last hour when her father would hurry up and get up there.

"You know how it works, Syd. Nobody can go in there while he's interrogating." Vaughn looked down at her sadly while she sat staring at the door. "And knowing now that Senator Douglas intentionally planned on murdering your mother, I'm sure your dad's going to be in there awhile."

"Vaughn, did you see her face?" She looked at him with unshed tears. "She never talks about it and to see it like that and realize everyone in the office has seen it. That look on her face like she was in another world, Vaughn, I'm scared for her."

"She'll be ok, Sydney," He knelt in front of her, speaking softly. "She's strong. She's made it through a lot. She'll be ok."

Just as he finished, Irina appeared in the doorway, her facial expression unreadable, a hollowness in her eyes.

Sydney said nothing as Irina walked towards them, waiting for her mother to speak. Irina was remarkably calm and collected as she stood in front of them, keeping her eyes focused only on Sydney, avoiding the looks of everyone else.

"Is your father done yet?" Irina asked quietly, wanting to go home.

"No." Sydney tried not to tear up looking into her mother's eyes.

"Would you mind watching Lena for me? I think I'm going to hit the gym until your father is ready to go? I just fed her, she's sleeping again in your father's office."

"Yeah, of course." Sydney swallowed the lump in her throat seeing her mother pulling away.

"Thank you." Irina reached up to squeeze Sydney's shoulder, trying to comfort her daughter the best she could at the moment.

"Weiss and I are headed down there now. We'll take you." Vaughn looked from Irina to Sydney and nodded.

Weiss, Vaughn and Irina left Sydney standing in Ops, Kendall walking up to stand beside her as she watched them go.

"Did she say anything?" He asked softly when they'd disappeared.

"No. Nothing." Sydney sniffled finally letting the tears go now that her mother was gone. "And that's what scares me."

He wrapped his arm momentarily around her shoulders giving her a squeeze. "She'll work it out, Sydney."

Irina emerged from the locker room, hair in a loose ponytail and in the new workout clothes the CIA wardrobe had given her. Tight black sleeveless tee, black yoga pants and Irina decided to forgo the shoes. Preferring the rawness and grip of bare feet.

Weiss, Marshall and Vaughn already working out as well as a few other agents she'd never seen before.

_***Crawling in My Skin***_

Slowly she taped her knuckles, concentrating on the tautness instead of acknowledging the people she knew were looking at her.

"I'll hold the bag for you." Vaughn stepped forward, knowing she needed this release and willing to take a beating if necessary. "Go ahead."

Irina began hitting it slowly, rhythmically at first and not too hard, left, right, left, left, left, right, jab, jab, gradually her speed and hardness increased.

Vaughn had his whole body against the bag, trying to steady it and would occasionally let out a, humph as Irina continued beating the stuffing out of the bag.

Angry tears in her eyes and her knuckles bleeding she worked herself into a sweat, as did Vaughn just holding the bag. Twenty minutes of pounding the bag with all she had, fists and legs of fury, Irina's white tape hung, blood red from her fists now, having pounded it off. The bag covered in blood, as well as splatters onto Vaughn's shirt. The others in the gym, watching with sadness, while pretending to keep working out, as Irina fought her imaginary demons to death. Sydney had turned the security monitors to display the gym and watched with tears in her eyes as her mother pummeled the bag with the rage she held inside. Irina landed a right punch to the bag that slipped off the bloody bag and hit Vaughn in the corner of the mouth. Stepping back and breathing heavy, tears streaming down her cheeks as she watched Vaughn wipe the now bloody corner of his mouth.

Vaughn could see she was about to explode and knew she needed to, so he egged her on. He looked her in the eye and walked to the mats, taking a martial arts bo and throwing one to her, as well as one to Weiss.

Irina needed physical contact, fighting hand to hand with someone. She gripped the bow, feeling the blood squish between her fingers as Vaughn took a stance.

"Oh shit!" Sydney watched what was happening from Ops. "I have to get down there, somebody's going to get seriously hurt. Will you watch Lena, please?" She asked Kendall who nodded he would and she tore off the direction of the gym.

"Come on." Vaughn nodded, preparing for Irina's advance, as did Weiss.

She lunged at him and the sound of the bo's cracking rang throughout the gym, everyone stopping to watch as the two men battled Irina. With Irina's aggressiveness, neither man was holding back knowing she was out for blood, not necessarily theirs, but someone's.

Vaughn swung the bo low and Irina jumped over it, shoving her bo backwards to thump Weiss in the chest, knocking him backwards a few steps as he attacked her from behind.

Vaughn rebounded just in time as Irina's bo shot forward and landed just outside his head. He hardly had time to recover before she planted her bo and swung her body around it, kicking the legs out from under him.

Jack appeared from behind the doors to find everyone watching the monitors. Kendall was now holding the baby and Irina and Sydney were nowhere in sight. He looked to the monitors and saw Irina, Weiss and Vaughn pummeling each other with bo's, bloody and looking like all out war.

Weiss attacked her again and their bo's clashed a few times before Irina threw her arm back and nailed him in the nose, a sickening crunch sounded as she'd broken it. To Weiss's credit, he kept fighting and landed a few solid blows to Irina's bo, driving her back towards the wall.

"What the hell is going on?" Jack took the baby from Kendall, eyeing the screen, confused as to what was happening and why Irina looked homicidal as she attacked the other two agents.

"She saw one of the agents working on the tapes from Kashmir and demanded to see them and before you yell at me, there was no stopping her." Kendall swallowed hard seeing Jack's reaction. "She locked herself in your damn office for almost two hours then emerged declaring she wanted to 'hit the gym' until you were finished. She's been beating the shit out of them for the last half hour. Sydney just went down there before she kills one of them."

"My God," Jack looked up just in time to see Irina use the wall and her bo to propel herself up and over the heads of both Vaughn and Weiss coming up behind them and whacking them both across the back.

Vaughn rolled and kicked Irina's legs out from under her, he flipped up off the ground the same time Irina did. He advanced on her and the clashing of the bo's rang out as they dueled for dominance, joined by Weiss driving Irina further back into the other wall.

Suddenly a loud crack rang out as Irina's bo broke in two from the force. She continued to use both pieces to fight off the attackers and kicked Vaughn's bo away right as she did a spin kick that landed right to his chest knocking him backwards. She used both broken pieces against Weiss, now covered in blood running down from his nose. She came flying at him and when she had him against the opposite wall, she swept his legs out from under, scaled the wall above him, flipping backwards and throwing a broken bo piece behind her. Another sickening crack was heard, followed by a thump as Marshall fell over, taking a broken piece right to the nose. Irina looked back briefly to see the other agents helping Marshall out of the gym and prepared for Vaughn's attack. He backed her into a corner, the loud cracking of the bo's and the sounds of their grunts of exertion the only sound as everyone stood paralyzed by the battle going on.

Just as Vaughn was about to attempt another sweep Irina dodged, and cracked him across the side of the face. He fell to the side with the force of the blow and Irina stood over him panting, eyeing Weiss who was trying to recover and blowing blood out of his nose.

Looking like gladiators after battle, all of them covered in each other's blood, Irina turned and met Sydney's tear filled eyes, Jack entering just behind her with the baby, now the only spectators in the room besides Weiss and Vaughn.

"Mom…" Sydney spoke slowly, voice quivering, as the fire in Irina's eyes still raged, afraid to approach her mother she moved towards her slowly.

_***Malleus Mareficarum***_

Irina saw the fear of her in her daughter's eyes and her exterior crumbled. She slowly slid to the floor, her tears coming faster and faster as silent sobs wracked her body. Sydney crumbled along side her and pulled her mother into her embrace, remembering now, the last time she'd seen her mother breakdown like this was after learning the news of her grandmother's execution right before she was extracted.

"It's ok." Sydney pulled Irina closer as sobs wracked her body, crying equally into her mother's hair as they sat on the mats on the floor of the gym. "It's not your fault. It's ok, Mom, let it out." She looked over her mother's shoulder to her father crying as well. Vaughn and Weiss both with tears in their eyes seeing Irina finally crumble.

"That's enough, turn it off." Kendall waved with glistening eyes, wanting to give them some privacy and not have the entire Ops floor witnessing Irina breaking down.

Jack walked over slowly and knelt beside them with the baby, doing his best to wrap his arms around all three of them. They held each other like that until Irina's sobs had subsided.

"Let's go home." Jack kissed her head and cheeks, palming her cheek and forcing her to look at him. "The time has come, Irina." He looked deep into her eyes and she nodded slowly, knowing that she would have to tell them now about what happened. Jack handed her the baby, Lena's beautiful white outfit, now covered with drops of her mother's blood.

Jack helped both Irina and Sydney to stand, looking over at Vaughn and Weiss who were battered and bleeding. He nodded, giving his silent thanks and appreciation for what they'd done for Irina. He wrapped his arm around Irina and Sydney took her hand as they left the building.

"Let's get you to the hospital." Vaughn threw his arm around Weiss's shoulders and winced as he grabbed his ribs; sore and bruised from where Irina had landed a solid hit with the bo.

Irina had showered and now sat curled up on the sofa with a blanket in front of the fire watching the flames lick the stones, lost in complete thought as she waited for Sydney and Jack to finish in the kitchen.

They'd come home in complete silence and Jack had made Irina some peanut butter and jelly toast, setting it with orange juice and her insulin on a tray on their bed while she showered, knowing after that exhausting battle her sugar would need a boost.

He left her alone to eat, inject and change, giving her some time to regroup before she met them downstairs.

Jack entered the living room, carrying the baby also freshly bathed and now asleep, and rolls of gauze and tape to bandage Irina's hands. He gave her a small smile as he laid the baby in Irina's lap, her knees bent, propping the baby up so she could look at her.

Irina ran her fingers over her daughter's tiny features continuously marveled by her and Jack was relieved to see her crack a small smile as Lena's arms shot out in her sleep, stretching.

Jack kneeled in front of her, gently taking one hand; her knuckles, raw, bloody and already swollen and bruising he squirted antiseptic on the cuts and immediately blew air softy across them to lessen the sting. He looked up and met her adoring eyes, smiling softy as he continued to wrap her hand in gauze and tape it before starting the other.

"Here Mom." Sydney handed her steaming cup of tea as she took the chair next to Irina when Jack had finished.

"Thank you, Sweetheart." Irina gave her a small smile as tears already began forming in her eyes, knowing what she was about to tell them.

Holding onto Lena's tiny hand for strength as she stared at the innocent baby in her lap, she asked softly, "Where do you want me to start?"

_***A Small Measure of Peace***_

"I mean you already know a great deal of it from the tapes." Irina reached up to wipe the tears from her eyes, focusing on the sleeping baby rather then looking them in the eye. She really didn't want them to hear this, especially Sydney. But both she and Jack realized, leaving Sydney out of this conversation would only increase her curiosity, knowing she'd try to find out on her own and undoubtedly get herself into trouble. Sydney had already known so much; she might as well know the rest of the truth, the whole truth. No more secrets in their family. She was no longer a child. She was an adult, one who had already dealt with so much in her young life. She could handle this. They would handle this as a family.

"Yes." Jack answered softly, wanting so badly to take her in his arms but knowing he needed to giver her the space to do this. "Why don't you tell us about Cuvee?" He swallowed hard remembering her screaming out her promise to kill him. "There isn't anything of what he did to you privately on those tapes. But I know, it's him who haunts your dreams." He paused to look at her and then to Sydney who also had tears in her eyes. "The other night, you promised to kill him in your sleep, Irina. What was he doing to you?"

"Jack," She sighed and started crying harder, trying to stay in control. "If I tell you and Sydney…" She shook her head no at the thought of what would happen.

"We'll still be here." Jack leaned over and took her hand. "We're not going anywhere. Irina, you aren't to blame for what happened to you. Why can't you see that?" His eyes got blurry with unshed tears. "Please Honey, just tell us."

Irina was quiet a moment as she calmed herself.

"About two days after the first time…the first time," She struggled to admit out loud what they'd done, for the first time ever, to anyone, "they raped me," she finally spat out and tried to control her shaking body as Sydney fought to control her crying, seeing her mother and hearing her admit it out loud. "Gerard ordered the guards to…to bring me into his office." She closed her eyes as tears slipped under her lashes, trying to shake the mental image, "He had a metal bed in there…and he had them cuff me to it. Hands above my head feet spread to opposite ends." Her breath caught as she tried to focus. "He used a knife and cut down the center of my clothes tearing them off. And then he," She swallowed hard, "Raped me telling me that I was secretly begging him for it." She paused, "When he was finished, he lit a cigar and left me naked on the bed while he told me about what was happening with you that you'd been taken away to prison as well and Sydney was all alone." She reached up to wipe her cheeks from the continuous flow of tears.

"He drank a little and then walked over and put his cigar out here," She lifted her arm to expose a round circular scar near the beginning of her armpit. "And then he raped me again. When he was finished he let his officers in to have a round with me." She was quiet a moment. "They'd taken me back to my cell and left me naked for the night. He'd have them come get me three or four nights a week regularly after that he started to get creative and had special…" She paused as the overwhelming images assaulted her memory, trying to hold her sob, "He had special hooks and brackets put in his office so that he could have me standing against the wall or lying face down on his desk." She tried to swallow, finding it dry. "Always when he was finished he would light a cigar and drink while he watched his officers have a turn all of them laughing and joking about it. The nights he didn't call for me the officers would come to my cell. I tried to fight them off many times but they'd always end up injecting me with a paralyzing drug and take turns raping me again and again and again…" She cried and blinked back her tears. "Our baby," She began, as the tears poured down her cheeks, "Was not the only time I was pregnant while I was in prison." She choked back, as a stunned Sydney looked to Jack, who felt his heart equally stop at Irina's admission she was pregnant from rape.

"I was actually pregnant six other times that I know of besides our child." She admitted and Sydney looked horrified to her father. "The dream that I was having the other night… I was in his office again and he'd just finished raping me on the bed. He noticed that my abdomen was round and firm again that I was pregnant again and he kissed my belly, asking God to Bless the child if it was his," She ran her fingers down Lena's little arm. "And I knew what he was going to do because he'd done it all the other times and I didn't cry or beg him not to. I just got up and got dressed, the guards cuffed me and dragged me to the stair's landing." She looked sadly at the baby in her arms and her voice began to quiver. "I just stood there, waiting…waiting for Gerard to give the order…waiting…and then it came and I felt the foot to my back…and then I was falling. As soon as I hit the bottom the cramping began and I again waited…waited for them to come and finish it…kicking the 'life' out of me."

Sydney had to cover her mouth from letting her sob escape at the horror.

Irina sobbed, "I felt guilty for wanting to rid any evidence of their actions but none of us knew who fathered those babies. I was being raped forty or more times a week by at least eight different men daily." She admitted and Jack and Sydney both did the quick mental calculations in their heads. Irina had been raped, not hundreds of times liked they'd feared over the course of the year and a half, but thousands. Well over three thousand by the time she'd gotten out nearly two years later.

"Gerard would always stand at the top watching until I passed out. I would wake up on the floor of my cell covered in my own blood with various broken and dislocated bones from the fall. The intense cramping reminding me of what I'd let them do to me!" She angrily wiped her tears away, "What I wanted them to do." She paused momentarily to control a sob and take a breath, "They would give me a couple of days and then it'd start all over, warning me not to get pregnant again. Yelling at me that I was a 'fertile bitch' while the guards raped me and he laughed."

Jack felt the knots in his stomach rise into his throat, remembering Cuvee's message to Irina in the flowers, 'you always were a fertile bitch.' Reminding her of the times she'd been pregnant in prison, the result of gang rape.

"Once I was put in solitary," she started again, "then they would come to me, raping me in the darkness of that cell." She swallowed, closing her eyes and blinking as more tears fell. "Once I was released and put into reconditioning," She started sobbing and her body began to shake violently, "I did whatever he wanted. I did whatever he wanted. I gave myself to him willingly. I just wanted it to be over. I'm so sorry, Jack." She sobbed and Jack flew to her side as sobs wracked her body, "I'm so sorry."

"Irina," He cried pulling her into his arms and rocking with her slowly, "You have nothing to be sorry for. You didn't do anything wrong." He cried, and the tears fell down his cheeks, into her hair. "You didn't do anything wrong." He repeated hoping she would believe it. "You did what you had to do. I love you, Irina. I love you." He reached behind him with one arm and pulled Sydney by the hand into the embrace, hearing her sobbing behind him and knowing this was a monumental family moment, they all needed each other.

"I'm going to find and kill every one of them." Sydney sobbed angrily brushing the tears away when they pulled apart moments later.

"No, Sydney!" Irina reached out to grab her daughter's hand, adding softly, "I already found and killed every one of those men who raped me." She admitted to surprised and not so surprised Sydney and Jack, who completely understood her reasoning. "Except Gerard and you promised me you would leave him to me. Sydney, please. If he ever caught you the thought of what he'd do…" Irina's eyes filled with tears again and she bit back a sob as she pulled Sydney into her again. "Please Sweetheart, I want you to stay away from him. I will deal with him."

Jack wholeheartedly agreed with Irina on this one now, after hearing how vicious the man really was. The thought of Sydney being in Irina's position was too much. He didn't want Sydney to be there, when they found Cuvee but he sure the hell was going to be. If Irina wanted to be the one to kill him, fine by him. She deserved to a million times over, but he'd be damned if he ever left that man alone with his wife ever again, hearing what he'd done to her time and time again.

"Promise me, Sydney?" Irina pulled her daughter's face back to look in her eyes.

"Ok Mom, I promise." Sydney sniffled seeing the same fear in her mother's eyes now, as she did that night in Moscow when Cuvee suggested he use her, Sydney, in treatments against her mother. "I promise."

"Do you feel any better?" Jack brushed the hair behind Irina's ear when they'd all calmed down.

"Yes, I guess so. It feels good to tell somebody." She smiled sadly, as tears started pooling in her eyes again.

"Thank you, for telling us." Jack brushed his hand over her cheek, looking deeply into her eyes, knowing now, why it was so hard for her to talk about it. "I love you, Irina no matter what, I love you." He linked their fingers and kissed her hand. "You'll have to have this looked at tomorrow." Jack tenderly touched her hand that had been recovering from surgery, now swollen and bleeding.

"It's fine, Jack," Irina smiled at him softly, seeing the concern in his eyes. "Just a little stiff, but I don't think I tore anything." Her hand had been healing fairly well since the surgery to repair her tight tendons; she'd regained the movement of her fingers and some of the feeling in the tips of her fingers. Hitting the bag probably wasn't the best thing for it.

"I don't think it would hurt to have it looked at." Jack gave her a knowing look, trying to break through her stubbornness. "Just to make sure."

"Ok, fine." She relented, giving in, realizing that he was right.

Irina, Jack and the baby had spent the remainder of the evening at home in front of the fire, listening to soft music and just enjoying each other's company, while Sydney had gone over to Vaughn's, telling them she'd be back in the morning to help finish Lena's nursery.

Sydney found Vaughn and Eric both, at Vaughn's house, licking their wounds from the ass whooping Irina had given them, and thanked them both profusely before breaking down, sobbing. She had been fairly brave in front of her mother but the enormity of everything Irina had told them finally too much and she had to talk about it with someone.

Vaughn held her and convinced her that she needed to talk about it so Sydney began telling them what happened with her mother, crying and shaking all over again, as she recanted the terror Irina faced in Kashmir that wasn't on the tapes.

Jack and Irina had gone to the doctor early in the morning to have Irina's hand checked out and it was 'ok.' Sydney had returned in the late morning to her parent's house as promised.

Irina had answered the door, smiling and pulled her oldest daughter into her arms, holding her just a second longer then necessary and wished her a 'good morning.'

They'd painted the old guest room, now Lena's room, yellow with white trim that matched the new white furniture Irina had ordered from the Pottery Barn perfectly. Irina wanted the room to be bright with color and Sydney had been the one who found the perfect bedding and curtains that now adorned the room.

_***Never Grow Old***_

"It's all done." Sydney had just finished hanging the mobile above the crib when she looked over to her mother sitting in the picture window, leafing through various children's books that had been Sydney's as a child, a small smile on Irina's face as she remembered reading them many times to Sydney.

Irina looked up from the pages, closed the book and smiled as she looked around the room and then landed on Sydney.

"Thank you." She stood pulling her daughter into her arms, holding her from behind; she rested her chin on Sydney's shoulder as they stood looking around the finished room together. "Where did your father go?" She asked after a moment of silence.

"He went to get the camera." Sydney started to giggle thinking about how 'giddy' her father had been all day.

"Oh Jack." Irina giggled with her, shaking her head. "Your father did the same thing when we finished your nursery. I was enormously pregnant at the time and he kept making me pose with every stuffed animal, then in front of your crib, the window…everything, he was driving me mad! Then when we brought you home from the hospital, we had to pose all over again." She laughed at the memory just as Jack made his way into the room carrying Lena and camera in hand.

Seeing the look Irina was giving him and shaking her head, he tried to defend himself knowing what she was thinking about.

"Oh come on, it wasn't that bad!" He kneeled in front of the rocking chair, setting the camera on the floor and then gently laid a sleeping Lena on a propped pillow. "I remember making you laugh on more then one occasion that day." He smiled smugly, picking up his camera and taking a step back.

"Yes, but I wasn't laughing with you. I was laughing at you!" Irina laughed, as did Sydney when Jack made a face and continued with his mission of getting the perfect shot.

Irina linked her arm with Sydney's as the two stood watching Jack, Sydney completely fascinated watching her father, never having seen him like this before.

"Oh just take the picture, Jack!" Irina laughed as he moved the camera and himself, continuously searching for the right shot.

"I'm not listening to you." Jack replied from behind the camera in a dead serious tone, earning him a laugh out of both women. He finally snapped a series of pictures and beamed proudly. "You laugh, but I've taken some pretty great photos of you and Sydney if you'll recall." He raised his eyebrow, challenging her, while he picked up the baby.

Irina nodded, he had indeed. One of those being the one she cherished most, the one that had some how found its way into her KGB file. She mentally shook the thought from her head. 'Not today.' She sighed to herself, not wanting to ruin the day with thoughts of her former job.

Instead she replied with, "Yes Jack, you're an artistic genius." She winked, enjoying teasing him once more as she reached for the baby. "Let's get something to eat." She smiled, nuzzling the baby's head, making her way towards the door, heading downstairs.

Jack and Sydney stood together watching as she disappeared with the baby. Jack wrapped his arm around Sydney's shoulder, smiled at her and pulled her head to his lips, kissing her softy in the hair.

"Thank you." He smiled.

"For what?" Sydney asked unsure as they walked out into the hall.

"For being you. For being here." He admitted shyly.

"Okay..." Sydney giggled. "You're really happy aren't you?" She asked having never seen her father so happy in all her life, so at ease.

"Yes." He admitted, pulling her closer to him as they walked. "I think I've finally gotten my soul back." He turned his head to look at her with a small smile at Sydney's sharp intake of breath.

"I'm glad." She answered in all seriousness.


	24. Chapter 24

_**AN: **_**Music for this chapter (on repeat): _Holly Jolly Christmas _by Burl Ives_, Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree _by Brenda Lee_, Happy Christmas (War is Over) _by John Lennon_, For Your Precious Love _by Jerry Butler_, Beautiful _by Snoop Dog_, Try _by Pink.**

* * *

TWENTY-FOUR

o

"Mom," Sydney was curled up in the living room chair with Lena, having talked for some time with her parents after they'd finished eating dinner. "Tomorrow's your birthday. What would you like to do?" She smiled, looking up to catch a surprised Irina leaning back against Jack's chest on the couch as they watched their daughters.

"Well, I…" Irina furrowed her brow in thought, having celebrated every birthday since Kashmir, alone in her own solitude. Deciding this was the year of change, "I want to have a party." She smiled. "But not really a birthday party. I want to have a tree party. A Christmas Party nothing too big of course but," her enigmatic smile continued to grow with the idea, "I want to spend the day laughing and having fun. I want to cook and make cookies with you," She sat up, escaping Jack's embrace to excitedly hold Sydney's hand, "And listen to crazy Christmas music."

"Oh no," Jack grumbled, smiling on the inside at Irina's ability to bounce back.

"You'll listen to that Christmas music, Jack Bristow, and you'll like it!" Irina hit him with a pillow and laughed. "And I want you to invite Michael and Eric and Marshall. I owe them a debt of gratitude." She added solemnly and then looked to Jack and Sydney to see if it was okay.

"I think it sounds like a lot of fun!" Sydney smiled from ear to ear, the thought of spending time with her mother, like this again, almost too good to be true.

"Sounds good." Jack laid back lazily on the couch after an exhausting day propping his feet up on the coffee table.

"Oh this is going to be so much fun!" Irina turned and snuggled into him, her head on his chest, his arm around her shoulders.

**_*Holly Jolly Christmas*_**

Irina, Sydney, Jack and Lena had all gotten up at the crack of dawn to drive north to a little town of Filmore where they boarded the _Santa Train_.

The train took people out into the forest to cut down their own trees and then would serve hot chocolate and candy canes on the ride home as everyone sang Christmas carols. Sydney had always loved it as a little girl and if truth be told, so did Jack and Irina.

They arrived home, with a giant tree just after noon. Sydney laughing as she watched her parents argue over how to get the enormous tree Irina had picked out, since it was her birthday, into the house.

"I told you it would fit." Irina looked triumphantly at Jack as they finally stood the enormous tree in its stand in the corner of the living room.

"It's enormous." Jack stood back to look at the tree. "Why did you have to pick out the biggest damn tree there, Irina? I think a smaller one would have been just as sufficient and it wouldn't have taken us an hour to get the damn thing in the house. Bigger doesn't necessarily mean it's better. The size doesn't matter."

"Oh dear, Jack," She smiled enigmatically. "You poor man. Who ever told you size doesn't matter is a liar. Size always matters. The bigger the better, my dear, the bigger the better." She winked, swatting him on his butt as she walked into the kitchen and Sydney rolled her eyes, trying not to laugh as her father looked dumbfounded and confused at how Irina had just turned the tables on him so quickly.

"Sydney!" Irina called from the kitchen, "Let's make cookies!"

Sydney's smile lit her face at her mother's request, "Looks like you get to the be the one who looks for the Christmas ornaments." She patted her father on the back as she walked passed, laughing as Jack grumbled something as he marched up the stairs.

_***Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree ***_

"Hello!" Irina smiled brightly an hour later at the three young men standing in front of her at the door, all battered, broken, and bruised. "I'm sorry." Her smile faded to a sheepish grin as she took in their appearances and kissed them all hello on the cheek as they made their way into the house.

Vaughn's cheek was covered in a giant bruise, one black eye and a fat lip; Weiss and Marshall both sported white nose casts and black eyes. "It's ok."

They all offered smiles, all a little smitten with the beautiful woman in front of them and happy to see her smiling again.

"Owe!" Marshall and Weiss both exclaimed, wincing at the same time from smiling, the movement irritating their noses.

"Happy Birthday. I brought some Egg Nog." Marshall rambled smiling, his voice sounding funny through his plugged nose. "Owe!" He said again, his smiling so second nature he kept forgetting he wasn't supposed to. "You have a…flour…on your cheek." He pointed to Irina's face, still nervous in her presence.

"Hi!" Sydney emerged from the kitchen, her face and clothes also sporting the soft white powder; she and Irina had gotten into a small flour war earlier.

"Hi." Vaughn greeted her with a smile, as she kissed him hello. "You look like you're having fun." He smiled wiping a bit of flour from her nose, loving how happy she looked and remembering her memory recount of another time, long ago, of baking cookies with her mother. The image to him then had been so unbelievable, but not any longer seeing it in front of him.

"Yeah well mom plays dirty." She smiled at Irina. "She got me while I was holding a tray of frosted cookies and completely defenseless."

"That's not playing dirty, Sydney, that's playing smart." Irina laughed as she escorted them all into the living room just as a buzzer was sounding in the kitchen. "I'll get the last batch." She nodded at Sydney.

Jack entered just after Irina left, carrying an enormous box labeled, Easter, looking stern.

"What took you so long?" Sydney helped him set the box onto the sofa. "This is the wrong box. It says, Easter." She looked at him confused.

"No, its not." Jack huffed gruffly, still annoyed. "The box labeled, _Thanksgiving_ has the Easter stuff, Thanksgiving stuff is actually in the _Fourth of July_ box, Fourth of July stuff is actually in the _Christmas_ box. Some jackass labeled the boxes wrong and it took me forever to figure out what was in each box."

"That ass, Jack, was you." Irina smiled entering the room, carrying the baby in one arm and a tray of cookies in the other. "You labeled them wrong when we first decided to put them in boxes."

"Well, why the hell didn't we ever change them into their right boxes?" He asked annoyed pulling Easter grass from his hair.

"Because I knew which box had what inside, so there was no point." Irina laughed, taking a bite out of a cookie as she passed the tray around.

"Why didn't you tell me before I went up there then, that all I needed to look for was the damn _Easter_ box?" He gave a stern look at the four trying not to laugh at the exchange, plopping himself into the big leather chair and grabbing a cookie shaped like a bell.

"Because it's kept you busy for the last hour." She breezed by him, dropping a kiss to his cheek. "And I love to see you all worked up."

"I'm glad you find me amusing." He stuffed the cookie into his mouth and reached for another.

"Very." She smiled seductively and he had a hard time remembering anything but how much longer they had to 'wait.' She was torturing him, and she knew it.

_***Happy Christmas (War Is Over)***_

"Let's decorate this tree!" Irina smiled gleefully digging into the box, pulling out things she hadn't seen in years.

Everyone dug in and the laughter began as they began recounting tales of Christmas's past.

When they'd finished, they pulled out the games and laughed hysterically as Jack and Marshall got into some interesting poses playing Twister.

After an hour, Irina had disappeared upstairs only to re-emerge on the top landing minutes later, arms full of gift boxes wrapped in beautiful paper.

"Mom, what is this?" Sydney helped take the boxes from her mother.

"Gifts." Irina smiled quizzically.

"Yes, I can see that. But it's your birthday! You said 'no gifts." Sydney gave her a stern look she had inherited from Jack and used often.

"Yes, I said I didn't want gifts. But that doesn't mean I can't give them." She smiled at her daughter, brushing her cheek with her fingers as she moved Sydney's hair behind her ear. "It's a Christmas party after all."

Sydney shook her head as Irina began passing out the boxes to everyone. "Well, I have one for you, too." She smiled at Irina's surprised look, "You're not the only one who is stubborn, you know." She ran up the stairs and came down moments later with a gift in silver paper, tied with a beautiful red ribbon. "You first, its your birthday." She commanded as she gave Irina the present. She took Lena from her mother's arms and took a seat in front of the fire place, smiling from ear to ear as she watched Irina slowly unwrap the gift.

"Oh, Sydney," Irina smiled taking the framed photo out of the tissue paper, "It's beautiful." She felt her eyes begin to tear. "When on earth did you do this?"

The photo was a black and white, close-up of Sydney and Lena. Sydney, with bare shoulders exposed, stopping just before exposing anything, was holding the tiny naked baby, balled up in her hands, their faces pressed together, cheek to cheek. Lena was sleeping, of course, and but both she and Sydney wore smiles, looking incredibly serene and beautiful.

"I had Katya distract you with shoes for an hour, remember?" She laughed, having finally pulled one over on her mother. "That day in Beverly Hills."

Irina nodded remembering her daughter's disappearing. "Yes."

Sydney smiled, "There's another box in there." She prompted Irina.

Irina pulled out a small box, from the tissues. Opening the lid revealed a beautiful silver locket. From the delicate chain hung an oval shaped locket surrounded on either side by the birthstones of April and November, signifying both girls' birthdates. Irina felt the tears threatening to fall as she snapped open the locket, revealing the same picture opposite of the inscription, 'We love you Mom, Your Girls' written in Cyrillic.

"It's a Mother's necklace." Sydney offered, choked up, verbalizing out loud what everyone already knew. "So you can take us with you everywhere…know how much we love you."

Irina was too moved to speak, and instead said nothing as she left her place beside Jack to pull Sydney and Lena into a fierce hug.

"Thank you." She kissed both of them as her eyes glistened with unshed tears, thinking how far she had come with Sydney and the thoughtfulness behind such a gift. "This is the best birthday present I've ever received. I love it… Thank you."

Sydney helped her put the necklace on as Irina smiled.

"Your turn." Irina handed Sydney a package in exchange for the baby.

Sydney wasted no time tearing through the paper, and ripping off the lid of the box. Inside she removed six, thick, leather bound journals that looked well worn. She looked curiously at her mother, waiting for an explanation as she began leafing through the pages, seeing her mother's handwriting but in English.

"I had Katya send them to me. For the last twenty years, I haven't been able to tell you what I feel for you, to talk to you. So long ago, I began writing to you what I wanted to say to you but knew I never could in these journals. It started as a letter to you on your ninth birthday and I kept writing in them, on all your birthdays, your first date, your first kiss." She smiled at a surprised Sydney, "Graduations…every major occasion in your life I knew I was missing at that time…its what I wanted to say to you. Other times, I would just write to you because simply, I missed you."

"Mom," Sydney looked up with glistening eyes, swallowing the lump in her throat. "I…I can't take your…"

"No." Irina smiled in return, "They're yours, Sydney. Those words are meant for you. I wrote them for you never expecting to ever see you again or have you read them but… I want you to know, that I've thought of you everyday we were apart…and I want to share them with you."

"Thank you." Sydney smiled wiping back the trail of tears on her cheeks. She'd believed in her heart now, that her mother had always loved her, thought about her while she was away but now, she held the physical proof in her hands. She couldn't wait to start reading them…her own new treasure. "Thank you." She repeated holding them close to her heart.

"Your turn boys." Irina smiled at the three young men holding their small golden packages in hand. "All three of you, together now."

The three looked nervously at each other as they untied the ribbons and removed the lids of the little boxes. In each box was a picture of Lena.

"Jack and I would like the three of you to be Lena's honorary Godfathers," She smiled at the stunned young men in front of her, their eyes wide with shock as they look between her, the baby and Jack, "You've all been so wonderful with everything and we couldn't think of three finer men we'd like to be her Godfathers."

"We don't know anything about babies." Weiss voiced panicked at the responsibility.

"It's ok." Irina smiled and chuckled, "You won't be required to do anything like that, don't worry. With Sydney as her Godmother, and you three as her Godfathers, Jack and I feel confident, that she'll always be loved and protected in our absence. We just want you to know that you mean a great deal to us and to Lena and to make you all official members in our family." She sat on the corner of the chair Jack was occupying, taking his hand in hers. "So please, say you'll accept?"

Sydney was smilingly madly as she had no idea her parents were going to do this.

"Of course." Came three soft, bewildered replies as they sat stunned by the fact that Irina Derevko and Jack Bristow had just invited them into their family, granted them all such an honor.

"Good." Irina smiled brightly having taken truly come to care about the three in front of her. "Now, remove the cotton." She instructed. They all looked at her bewildered but did as they were told.

"What's this?" Vaughn asked holding up the key in his box as did Weiss and Marshall.

"A key, Michael." She smiled enigmatically again, "Merry Christmas and Thank You." She added sincerely then laughed seeing their confused faces. "Go ahead." She nodded in the direction of the front door withJack and Sydney just as confused.

"No…you didn't…" Weiss looked down at the key in his hand that carried the logo of Chevy's Corvette, flew off the couch, his heart beating rapidly at the thought and he threw open the door. "Oh my God!" He shrieked with elation as he ran out of the house and straight for the red Corvette convertible now parked in the driveway with the big red bow and tag on the hood that read, 'Merry Christmas, Eric.'

Everyone followed through the door and Irina laughed, watching Weiss kiss the hood of the car and scream, "Thank You, Thank You!" in the air. "I love you!" He screamed with delight as he charged up the stairs, picked Irina up and twirled her around to everyone's surprise. "It's my dream car!"

"I know." She smiled when he finally set her down. "You told me that the other day." They'd all discussed in great detail, their favorite cars after she'd returned from shopping with Sydney and Katya, sporting four new cars.

"Thank you." He smiled though it hurt like hell and ran out to his new car again. "This is the best present ever!" He shouted with glee causing even the agents assigned to protect Irina to laugh at the man going ballistic with joy in the driveway.

Parked next to Weiss's Corvette was a black Escalade that read, "Merry Christmas, Michael" and behind that a dark green Land Rover that read, "Merry Christmas, Marshall."

"Go ahead." She nodded in the direction of the cars to the two men remaining with mouths agape on the porch.

"Than…thank…thank you," Marshall stammered unable to speak at the moment as he reached his hand out and clasped Irina's in his, stumbling backwards down the steps toward his new car.

"I can't accept this." Vaughn turned to her quietly. "It's too much." He knew why she was doing this, she felt guilty about beating the shit out of them, wanted to thank them for helping her 'get it out,' but he couldn't accept such a gift.

"Shut up, Mike!" Weiss yelled from the driver's seat of his new car, "Be polite and just say, 'Thank You' already, fool!"

"Yes, Agent Vaughn," Irina reached forward and took his hand in hers, squeezing it hard. "Please accept my gift to you… You've done so much for me…please let me repay you in my own small way?"

"It's too much. You don't need to thank me like this-" He tried objecting again but was cut off by Irina.

"What's the point of having money if I can't spend it on those I care about?" She smiled at him, catching him off guard at her admission that she 'cared' about him. She looked into his eyes for a moment and they came to a silent understanding.

"Thank You." He finally smiled softly.

"No…Thank You." She returned the smile as Jack pulled her into his arms as Vaughn and Sydney went to inspect the new cars.

"When did you have time to do this?" Jack whispered into her ear from behind, his breath tickling her as he spoke as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders as she adjusted the baby in her arms.

"Yesterday." She smiled watching the excitement and smiles her gifts had brought out, "I had them deliver them just after I knew the boys would arrive."

"You continually amaze me." He smiled shaking his head. "Are you having a happy birthday?" He asked seeing the radiant smile she wore.

"The best in twenty years." She turned into him, kissing him lightly on the lips, pulling back to stare into his eyes. "I have something for you too…but that I can't give to you in front of our daughter and her friends." She crinkled her eyebrows mischievously biting her lip, teasing him as she leaned in, placing one leg strategically between his, rubbing against him. "But you're going to have to wait a little while." She taunted. "Two weeks from today…"

"And I have something for you, too." He challenged, "But I guess you'll have to wait for that, too…if I have to wait." He smiled at her with his own smug grin, knowing how much she hated surprises.

"Ok, fine." She accepted this challenge with a seductive grin, brushing her leg against him and Jack instantly regretted his taunt.

Irina was a lethal competitor and wasn't likely to give in until she claimed victory in this case, Jack had just laid the rules of the game as the winner being 'who ever could hold out the longest' until the next two weeks were up.

She wasn't likely to show any mercy on him now.

'Why, oh why did he have to challenge her like this?' He berated himself as she turned around in his arms again, the feeling of her ass pressed against his crotch while he held her in his arms almost his undoing now that he was thinking along the 'sexual' lines.

Irina was swaying back and forth just for added torture.

* * *

When everyone had eaten dinner and gone home for the night, Jack stoked the fire, and turned off all the lights except for the tree lights and lit a few candles.

_***For Your Precious Love***_

Irina had been upstairs putting the baby to sleep and changing into her nightgown when she heard the familiar tune playing downstairs, unsure if she was hearing things. She walked slowly down the hall and looked over the railing, seeing the romantic setting and began her descent catching Jack's eyes sparkling with the light of the fire, she held them the whole way down.

"Jack, this song?" She asked nervously, unsure of what he was doing.

"Shhh," He smiled softly, silencing any further protests or inquiry. "May I have this dance?" He extended his hand to her, as she stood in front of him, breathtaking as always.

Irina took his hand, tears already pooling in her eyes as his hand snaked around her back and pulled her to him.

They hadn't danced, like this in the middle of the night, to this song for almost two decades. He pressed his cheek to hers as they swayed together in a familiar rhythm.

"I love you, Irina." He whispered into her hair as his hand caressed her soft fingers in his hand, that he held to his chest, fingering the empty space at the base of her left hand. He pulled back to look into her eyes, and smiled. "Thirty years ago tonight I danced with you and kissed you for the first time to this song." He ran his fingers over hers as he held them in his hand. "Twenty-nine years ago tonight, I asked you to marry me. Our love remains," Jack reached into his pocket and knelt on one knee just as he'd done all those years ago and held up a beautiful diamond ring, causing Irina to inhale sharply at his actions. "But the names have changed. And I want to ask you, Irina Nikolaevna Alexandra Dmitrievna Romanova Derevkova…to marry me?"

"Jack…" Irina could barely breath she was so overcome with emotion. "We're already married."

"Yes." He smiled, "But I didn't fully know the woman I was marrying then. I do now and I want to renew our vows and this time, I want it to be you, Irina that I make I my vows to. I love you and we're starting over; we should start with my promising to love you through eternity with your real name. I want to say your name, Irina. I want you to hear your real name when I promise God to love you forever, because I will. Please, say 'yes?" He slipped the ring up her finger; a perfect Princess cut diamond solitaire with two baguette side stones in a strong titanium band. A classically perfect ring for his classically beautiful wife to be...again.

"Yes." She let he tears flow as she dropped to her knees in front of Jack. "Of course I will marry you again. I love you."

He cupped her face and kissed her softly.

"I love you, Jack." She repeated as he kissed her again, both feeling a burning desire for more.

"I want you so badly right now." Jack admitted between kisses as his mouth connected with the burning flesh of her neck, face and chest.

"And I, you." Irina's hands started to undo the buttons of his shirt.

Jack's tongue slid down the pulse of her neck as he guided the straps from her shoulders. Irina's fingernails racked over his erect nipples causing him to gasp as she began sucking on the hollow in his throat. His hand slid up her thigh and under her nightgown, finding her without panties and already wet and waiting. She whimpered into his mouth as his thumb flicked her sensitive clit for the first time. Irina's hand slid down the front of his pants, unbuttoning them and gripping his painfully erect hardness, straining against the confines of his boxers. She pushed them down, freeing him and Jack reached forward, grabbing her hips and pulling her onto his lap. The tip of his cock being teased, and equally teasing her as it rubbed against her hot, wet, center. Irina reached down, between their bodies, rubbing herself against his rock hard shaft, both she and Jack moaning from the sensations running through their lower bodies.

"Wait, wait, wait…" Jack stopped, grabbing her hands in his. He closed his eyes and tried to slow his breathing. "I can't do this." He opened his eyes and caught her pained expression. "No, I mean I can't do this and not end up with me making love to you."

"We've done it before, Jack." She reached up to touch his chest, "We'll find a way."

"Irina," he reached up and brushed the wild hair out of her face. "The next time I make love to you I want to end with me being buried deep inside you, you and I as one. With my cherishing all of you…for that, I will wait." He smiled softly, "You've always been worth the wait. To me, this is just painful torture, ok?"

"Ok." She nodded, smiling softly at how amazing the man in front of her really was. "You're not just trying to win now are you?" She gave him a saucy look.

"No," He laughed pulling her face to kiss her lips quickly, "Believe me, Honey, this is one challenge I'd gladly forfeit a win to you if it meant I could do to you, exactly what it is floating through my mind."

"Good, hold those thoughts…two weeks." She picked up his hand and kissed his palm. "Let's go to bed. I think I may actually be able to sleep tonight for the first time in twenty years in your arms." Smiling softly, she stood and extended her hand to Jack, knowing he was going to need assistance standing at how aroused he was. He followed her up the steps, hand in hand the entire way.

Face to face, legs and arms entwined, Jack reached up and pushed a wayward curl behind Irina's ear as they lay in bed.

"Happy Birthday, Irina." He leaned in and captured her lips, "I love you." He added softly in Russian.

"I love you." She replied in English, inching her face closer to his so that their noses brushed, in what had become their new 'thing,' of telling each other of their love for the other by speaking in the language of their hearts.

As Irina predicted, she slept the entire night through without any nightmares for the first time in twenty years without the aid of drugs or being unconscious. Waking only to nurse the baby and falling immediately back to sleep in Jack's arms. This birthday had begun to set right the wrongs that started so many years before.

* * *

Jack was elated in the morning to find her in the same spot she had been in after Lena's last feeding…she had stayed, she had slept there all night. He kissed her lightly, smile plastered to his face at the hope this presented in their future without nightmares. He carefully pulled his arm out from under her, trying not to disturb her as he inched out of bed, getting up to get ready for work.

Irina immediately sensed the loss of contact and awoke.

"Sorry." He smiled sheepishly as he made his way to the bathroom. "I didn't mean to wake you…Go back to sleep."

"What time is it?" She rubbed her hand over her eyes, still not fully awake.

"It's 5 a.m. It's early. Go back to sleep." He whispered, hoping she would take his advice and get some more sleep.

She nodded and drifted off again as Jack showered and changed, peeking into Lena's bassinet before making his way downstairs for breakfast.

He was surprised when twenty minutes later, Irina, fully showered, changed, and obviously awake, breezed by him into the kitchen with a smile.

"Were are you going?" He asked setting his coffee down, taking in the black suit she was wearing.

"To work…with you." She smiled, pricking her finger to check her blood before she grabbed some breakfast.

"Irina." Jack began, unsure if this was a good idea.

"I'm ok, Jack. I'll be ok." She tried to smile reassuringly, correcting herself, admitting that she wasn't okay but that she was trying. She lifted her shirt to inject herself. "The faster we get Sloane and Cuvee, the faster this is all over. I'll be fine, I promise." She reached over and squeezed his hand, seeing the hesitation on his part.

"Ok," He pulled her to him, kissing her lips before releasing her to get the baby ready while Irina ate something.

Surprise was evident on the faces of everyone, including Sydney, as Jack and Irina strolled into the Ops floor an hour later. The look on Irina's face clearly stating she was ready to work and get down to business, which everyone understood and the search for Sloane began again.

"So it looks like I'm going to Jakarta." Irina stated, holding everyone's attention now after a few hours of poring over documents. "I will meet with my contact and he will get the word out that I am looking to make a business deal with Zamir."

"How are you going to do that? Get in touch with him, I mean?" Sydney asked.

"My contact works out of a beach club for the internationally wealthy in Jakarta. I have a home near there if I put myself out there he'll find me." She looked avoided Jack's eyes, not wanting to reveal just why this man would find her.

"What makes you sure he'll want to risk meeting with you after everything that has been publicized concerning you and your status, your time with the CIA? If he suspects you're working as a double with the CIA-" Kendall voiced the question she hadn't wanted to be brought up.

"He won't suspect and even if he does, he won't care." She swallowed and brushed the hair behind her ear. "He'll seek me out regardless. If the subject of the CIA arises, I'll handle it. I'll get him to trust me."

Jack had a feeling she wasn't revealing everything but didn't want to call her on it in front of everyone.

"Ok then, I'll call Van Nuys. Plane leaves in an hour." Kendall shifted his weight, feeling strange about trusting Irina Derevko on another mission for the CIA.

"I'll be flying there on my own." Irina cut in and received surprised looks from both Jack and Sydney. "He monitors airport traffic. He needs to see that my jet landed at our regular airfield. If I just show up at my home without his having seen my plane land at the airport, he'll know for sure that something is not right. I'll meet you there."

"Irina." Jack began but stopped, realizing what she was saying was right, though it did nothing to quell his anxiety over the situation. "Ok. Where do you want to meet?"

"My house." She smiled, thanking him silently for not fighting her on this. "I'll give you the coordinates. He knows I've just had a baby with all the press coverage so I'll take Lena with me. I'll leave her with you once we've met up." She looked at Jack and Sydney.

"I don't like the idea of the both of you going in, without security, Irina." He voiced his concerns softly, as he brushed the sleeping baby's face in her arms. "There has to be a way."

"What if I go with her as Lena's nanny?" Sydney spoke up, "They'll expect you to bring someone along to care for the baby while you're dealing with business." She looked at her mother with bright eyes.

The idea of going into the field with her mother again, working together was exciting.

"Makes sense." Irina nodded her agreement.

"And the three of us," Jack motioned between himself, Vaughn, and Weiss, "Could be members of your security detail."

Seeing Irina's surprised look, he added in Russian, getting into character. "I'll have Marshall make aliases for all of us if they happen to do background checks and profiles. All they'll find as that we're members of your Russian detail." He smiled enthusiastically at her.

"Ok." Irina agreed. "I've got to make some calls, get things arranged." She stood from her chair and switched hands holding the baby against her chest.

Sydney's eyes immediately fell upon the new enormous diamond ring adorning her mother's left ring finger.

"What's this?" She smiled in surprise as she took hold of her mother's hand, fingering the new ring.

"Your father asked me to marry him... again." Irina smiled softly, looking from the ring and Sydney to Jack.

"You did?" Sydney's head shot to her father's eye. "But I thought you're already married?"

"We are." He smiled shyly at Sydney, his eyes darting back and forth from Sydney to Irina's and the rest of the group watching intently. "But I wanted to renew our vows. This time, when I make my vows, I want it to be your mother's name I say. Her real name." He cracked a smile and surprised Kendall who was still getting used to this new relationship and the new Jack Bristow.

"Congratulations! This is so exciting!" Sydney flung her arms around her father and then her mother. The idea of her parents renewing their' vows, another miracle. "When? When is the wedding?" She rambled on excitedly.

"We'll talk about all that on the plane." Irina ran her fingers down Sydney's cheek and then tucked her hair behind her ear with a smile, loving the fact her daughter was so excited about she and Jack renewing their vows. "It's a long flight. For now, we have a lot to do before we leave in an hour."

"Yes, of course." Sydney smiled happily at her parents. Their lives…their love, had come so far, survived the impossible, to find their way back to each other again.

"Congratulations." Vaughn offered a small smile and a handshake to Jack and Irina. Weiss, Kendall and Dixon followed suit. The entire act of congratulating Jack and Irina on the renewal of their' wedding vows, still a bit surreal; after the last years' events.

"My plane will be at Van Nuys in an hour." Irina smiled at the bewildered faces.

"How's that possible?" Jack asked and then it dawned on him. "Your plane is close by, isn't it? It has been all along." 'Of course it would be.' He smiled and shook his head thinking to himself how 'crafty' his wife was. With her status, her plane would never be far from reach.

"Yes." Irina smiled slyly. "Just over the border in Mexico. It won't take long to get here once I make the call to my pilot."

"Well ok, folks." Kendall looked around at the members of this odd team. "I'll expect a call as soon as you arrive in Jakarta. Good luck people." He nodded and was off.

An hour later they all met at Van Nuys airfield. Marshall had given them all, save Irina and Lena, new aliases and all had been transformed somewhat into their new identities.

Sydney sported a long, wavy, blonde wig as her resemblance to Irina was too strong to leave as she was.

Jack, Vaughn and Weiss for the most part, stayed the same, save their new wardrobe. Jack's hair had been died black, as he would be the most recognizable from television of the three men with Irina's recent celebrity, along with glasses, a mustache and goatee.

"So who is this contact, Mom?" Sydney asked sipping her coffee as they'd been in the air for at least a half hour.

Irina nuzzled the baby's face as she slept on her shoulder. "His name is Vijay Dubey."

"The Indian weapons dealer?" Jack's interest peaked.

Dubey's record was a long one at the CIA. His mother was America, his father Indian. Grew up around the world, highly educated in private schools, wealthy and extremely dangerous.

"Among other things." Irina nodded as Jack poured himself another drink. "He's the one who first introduced me to Zamir, three or four years ago. Dubey will know how to get in contact with him. Besides he owes me." She reached for her own drink and let the cool liquid slid easily down her throat, preventing her from divulging any further information. "We should arrive in the morning. His guards will spot me at the airport. We'll go to my house, not far from the club he works out of... I'll put myself out there; he'll make contact. He and I will talk. I'll get what I need. Then we can all leave." She took another sip and set the glass down softly, staring at the ice, "Shouldn't be too difficult."

"Pretty cut and dry." Jack eyed her nervously as a sudden tension filled the cabin. She wasn't telling him something, something that was obviously bothering her. "How well do you know Dubey?" Jack swallowed hard, having a bad feeling about the mysterious air surrounding the man's name and Irina's reluctance in talking about him.

"Pretty well." Irina replied softly, looking directly into Jack's eyes.

"So…let's talk wedding details." Sydney sensed the need for a change in topic, and switched to a happier one. "Like, when?"

"I don't know." Irina turned her attention from Jack to her oldest child, adding softly, "Your father and I never discussed it."

Jack loosened his tie and took a big swig of his whiskey, not wanting his brain to further investigate the possibilities of just how well, was 'pretty well.'

"As soon as possible."

* * *

_Jakarta, Indonesia_

"Where is she?" Weiss pulled at the tie around his neck.

The sweltering sun causing him to sweat profusely in his black suit. The shade of the umbrella covering them did little to stifle the heat. "I thought she said she'd be out in fifteen. It's been twenty." He scanned the beach for any sign of Irina, eyeing Sydney a few meters away.

Sydney was lying on the beach not too far from them with Lena under the protection of another umbrella.

Irina had instructed them to head out before her, having them settle in before she made her appearance as to not cause too much commotion with their arrival.

"There she is."

_***Beautiful***_

Jack swallowed hard eyeing Irina approaching them as he twirled the little umbrella from his drink in his fingers. She was wearing an off-white bikini and matching sarong tied around her hips, her long hair flowing in the slight breeze as she walked through the surf towards Sydney and Lena. All eyes were on her.

"Damn Jack." Weiss tilted his sunglasses down the bridge of his nose to get a better look at the nearly naked form of Irina.

Vaughn threw him a warning glance from across the table seeing Jack tense as Irina dropped the sarong next to Sydney with a smile and sauntered toward the ocean diving head first into an oncoming wave.

At one of the tables not far from them, another man in a dark suit nodded in Irina's direction, pointing her out to another man as she made her way out of the ocean and back towards Sydney and the baby.

Jack's heart quickened in pace as the broad man smiled widely eyeing a water slicked Irina. The man, presumably Dubey, dressed in a casual dress shirt rolled up at the sleeves and in chino pants walked towards Irina.

Sydney saw the man approaching from behind her mother and didn't have time to notify her mother of the man's presence before he grabbed Irina's arm, twisted her around to face him, pinning her arm behind her back, crushing Irina's body into his as his lips came crashing down in a hot, deep kiss that left everyone stunned.

Vaughn watched as Jack's knuckles turned white and his lips formed a tight line watching the display in front of them. His suspicions of how well Irina knew Dubey were confirmed with the passionate kiss the man enveloped her in.

Sydney's eyes darted back and forth from her father to her mother from behind her shades, hoping that her father would keep his cool.

Dubey gave Irina one last light kiss on the mouth before pulling her away from him slightly to smile at her.

"Irina." He greeted her and brushed a wet hair stuck to her cheek behind her ear. "It's so good to see you again. It's been too long." Still holding her half-naked wet body next to his.

"Vijay," She smiled in return, her game face on. She knew Jack must be fuming a few feet away but they were there for a purpose, and he would just have to deal with it. "It has been a long time."

"I'm so happy to see you alive." He finally released her arm but trailed his fingers down her cheek with a smile. "I heard the Americans had executed you."

"They did." She offered a small smile, bending over to pick up her sarong and tied it around her hips again. "But…you should know by now, I'm never one to stay down long."

"Yes, I know and you're still as beautiful as ever." Dubey eyed Irina and then looked down to the baby sleeping on the blanket next to Sydney. "And this must be the child I've heard about." He squatted down next to the baby and trailed his finger across her cheek, much as he did with Irina's before offering Sydney a small smile and a nod of acknowledgment. "Irina Derevko…a mother." He gently scooped the sleeping baby into his arms and nestled her against his chest.

Irina inhaled a nervous breath as she watched him stand smiling and shaking his head in amusement.

"I never thought I'd see the day. All those times I offered to have a child with you, you said you weren't cut out for motherhood?" He nuzzled his face against Lena's hair watching Irina's reaction.

Jack's palms began to sweat and not from the heat. But rather from hearing this man talk about having children with Irina while holding his child. The implications of that relationship… He took a deep breath trying to focus on the present.

"I thought you said children would complicate things?" Dubey continued to question Irina with a look that could only be described as mixture of longing, remorse and lust.

"Yes, I did say that." Irina replied coolly, taking the now squirming Lena from his arms and holding her tightly to her own chest. "But things happen. Unplanned things," she smiled down at the baby. "Time changes everything."

"Not everything." He met her dark eyes with a deeper meaning letting everyone know how he still felt for Irina.

When Irina said nothing, only smiled shyly and handed the baby to Sydney, Dubey continued.

"And what of her father? Your former American husband I presume from what I've seen on television and heard through the 'grape vine?' What is your relationship with him now?" He took another step closer to Irina, using his hand to put her hair behind her shoulder while he caressed the other with his hand.

"We have an arrangement." Irina replied in a sultry tone and a mischievous look in her eye as she smiled and leaned into his palm now cupping her face.

"An arrangement. I see." He pulled Irina closer with a devilish smile, his hand snaking down Irina's back to her ass, cupping it and crashing their bodies together at their most intimate spots.

"Easy Jack." Weiss whispered through clenched teeth seeing Jack's ears burning red.

"There is a reason you came back to Jakarta, isn't there?" Dubey's thumb glided over the soft skin of Irina's hipbone. "Am I right?"

"Yes." Irina hissed out an uneven breath as Dubey's close proximity ignited an electrical surge through her body at the familiar contact. "I'm here to see you."

"Is that right?" Dubey smiled a cocky grin as his finger's trailed the soft skin of Irina's breast just above her bikini top. "And what is it that you want from me?"

"You owe me a favor. I'm here to collect." Irina smiled her famous grin as heart raced in her chest knowing Jack was watching this exchange and realizing her former relationship with this man.

"I expected as much." Dubey laughed and brought his other hand down to the other side of her hips to keep her body ground into his. "Have dinner with me tonight and we'll discuss just how…" He slowly rubbed his crotch against Irina's bare skin of her lower abdomen, "you intend for me to repay that debt." He brought his lips to hers once more, thrusting his hips forward before walking away leaving her breathless.

Irina stood unmoving, watching Dubey's retreating form when suddenly he turned around. "My driver will pick you up at seven. Wear that dress I love…to take off." He winked at her before disappearing into the crowd gathered outside the seaside bar.

Jack snapped the little umbrella between his fingers as the anger and jealousy surged through him.

"So…" Sydney handed her mother a cold bottle of water as Irina took a seat next to them on the blanket. "Pretty well' is really…'REALLY well." She raised her eyebrows expectantly at her mother, certain realizations coming together in her mind about her mother and Dubey and the relationship they'd obviously had.

Irina sipped the cool water, stalling momentarily and answered only with a slow nod of her head when she was finished. Her eyes on Jack at the other table, his rigid posture speaking volumes.

Sydney followed her mother's gaze, "Oh boy." She breathed exhaled slowly, "this is going to be interesting."

"Irina," Sydney called out, finding it strange to address her mother as such now and propped herself up on an elbow, rolling over to look at her mother after an hour of silence following Dubey's departure. "I know what you're doing."

"And what is it you think I'm doing besides working on my tan?" Irina asked coyly in Russian, keeping up with their charade in case anyone was listening to them or reading their lips. She was lying a few feet away from Sydney, sunbathing on her stomach outside the umbrella's shade.

"You're avoiding a certain someone." Sydney glanced over at the 'security' detail whose ties now hung loosely around their necks, their jackets discarded and lying over the arms of their chairs. "We can't stay out here all day. It's too hot and the guys are melting." She watched her mother's chest heave with a sigh before Irina turned her head to look at Sydney.

"You have an astute sense of reading people and situations, My Dear." She smiled at Sydney tipping her sunglasses down to look her daughter in the eye, "You must get that from your mother."

"I believe I do." Sydney laughed, enjoying working undercover with her mother, even in this tense situation.

"Can you help me with this?" Irina held her bikini to her chest and whirled her feet under her with her back to Sydney so that she could fasten the strap again. "I just hate getting tan lines." She used her free hand to whip her hair off her back and around her shoulder. "He's still glaring at me, isn't he?" Irina asked under her breath while her back was still turned. She could feel Jack's glacial gaze even through the sweltering heat.

"Mm-hmm." Sydney glanced a quick look at her father whose icy glare remained on her mother where it had been unflinching for the last hour.

"Suppose I better get this over with." Irina sighed again taking the baby in her arms and nodding to the guys to follow her she headed back to her home.

* * *

_***Try***_

"How long do you think this is going to go on?" Vaughn whispered under his breath to Sydney from the other side of the kitchen island where they sat staring at Jack's back outside on the patio.

They'd been home for hours now and neither, Jack or Irina had said anything to each other in that time. Both of them going their separate ways once inside the confines of Irina's enormous house.

Jack had thrown his jacket on the couch as he stalked passed, heading straight for the isolation of the back patio, staring at the endless sea before him and Irina, had told the 'kids' to help themselves to anything in the fridge before seeking refuge in the solace of her upstairs bedroom with the baby.

"I don't know." Sydney finally replied, her gaze lingering on her father's back as she absentmindedly toyed with the white ring from the top of her water bottle. "I have no idea. I never witnessed their relationship, remember? When they were together, I was only six and they never fought at least not in front of me. In front of me, it was all love, laughter and smiles. I saw them semi-fighting, more like bickering, when we went to Kashmir but maybe I should go out there and talk to him."

"And say what exactly, Syd? Slap him on the back and say 'Hey, tough luck, Dad, all those years you thought Mom was dead she was really getting screwed by some good looking, hotshot War Lord with enormous pecks and biceps that would make the Hulk look like Tiny Tim?" Weiss looked at her incredulously. "Somehow I don't think that conversation will go well."

"He's not a War Lord." Irina's voice came calmly from behind them, startling everyone. She'd put the baby down for nap after they returned home from the beach, showered and changed into a pair of black hot pant shorts and form fitting tee with her hair and make-up already for her night ahead.

"Irina…" Weiss stammered cursing himself internally, "I'm sorry…I never meant to imply-"

"It's ok." She placed her hand on his forearm with a small smile, stopping any further commenting on an already embarrassing situation. Her gaze drifted to where Jack was sitting outside watching the sunset. "Eric, Michael, you're going with me tonight." Seeing the surprised faces of the three she continued, "I think it's best if Jack stays here with Sydney and Lena." She looked pointedly at the young men, leaving little room for argument.

Her reasoning behind the move obvious to everyone without having to verbalize it: Jack was jealous, insanely jealous and even if he had a right to be upset about the situation, right now… could be dangerous if he lost the tight control he was barely maintaining.

"It's almost seven, I need to go finish getting ready," Irina said over her shoulder as she put two bottles of milk in the refrigerator, closing the door and looking pointedly at Sydney.

Irina gave her a sympathetic look, feeling badly for leaving her eldest daughter with such a distraught father.

"Lena should wake up in about an hour. Give her the bottle in the front first. The second, is backup but I should be home before her 10 p.m. feeding." She offered a small smile seeing the small look of surprise on Sydney's face at the mentioning she would only be gone, at the most, three hours.

Sydney gave her a small smile back, feeling badly for her mother and her father in this situation.

"Oh my God, do I feel like such an ass!" Weiss banged his head against the wall repeatedly when Irina had disappeared upstairs once again. "Why…why do ridiculous things flow from my mouth when I am around her? I should just wear a sign or something that says, 'Hi Eric Weiss…Open mouth, insert foot. 'Cuz I'm a mumbling jack-ass."

"It's ok, Eric, calm down." Sydney climbed slowly off the stool making her way towards the sliding glass doors leading to the patio. "I'm going to try talking to him."

"Dad." Sydney announced her presence softly, dragging a hand around her father's shoulders as she came around behind him. "Are you ok?" 'Stupid question!' she internally berated herself the moment it left her mouth. 'Of course he was not ok.'

Jack didn't say anything, just clasped Sydney's hand in his as she took a seat next to him. He was too angry and upset, afraid to speak and say something he would later regret.

In a strangled voice he asked, "It's almost seven. Is she ready?"

"She's getting dressed now." Sydney ran her thumb over the back of Jack's hand, a gesture that made Jack close his eyes momentarily flashing back to Irina doing the same thing when she was upset. "They'll be leaving shortly."

"They'll?" Jack's eyes flew open. "What do you mean 'they'll?"

Sydney tried to swallow the massive lump forming in her throat seeing the look in her father's eyes.

"Mom, Eric and Vaughn. She thought it best if she did this without you there-" She could hardly finish the sentence as Jack jolted out the chair.

"The hell she is!" He yelled throwing open the door and storming upstairs past the other two, who looked positively scared shitless at what was about to happen.


	25. Chapter 25

_**AN: This chapter has amazingly beautiful awesome music. They all do, IMO, but this one really strikes a chord. **_**Music for this chapter (on repeat): ****_Jealous_**** by Sinead O'Connor, ****_I Like the Way You Move_**** by Outkast, ****_Cry Me a River_**** by Justin Timberlake, ****_#1 Crush_**** by Garbage, ****_So Cold (The Good Wife Trailer version)_**** Ben Cocks, ****_Secret Garden_**** by Bryan Adams**

* * *

TWENTY-FIVE

o

_***Jealous***_

Irina was standing in her black bra and underwear in front of a full-length mirror, fastening her earring to her ear when Jack barged through the door, their eyes meeting in the reflection. He didn't bother shutting the door as he stood in the doorway looking at her as she moved to her closet and pulled a three-quarters length, strapless black dress from the hanger.

"I'm going with you." He said resolutely watching as she stepped into the silky black fabric and shimmied it up her body, over her hips with a high slit just over her right leg exposing what Jack deemed a 'dangerous amount' of her thigh.

"No. You're not." Irina ran her palms calmly over the fabric, smoothing the wrinkles, her back still facing Jack.

"Yes. I am." He took a step closer, the volume of his voice increasing.

"Jack, don't argue with me on this. Please?" She sighed frustrated as she sat on the corner of the bed, slipping her feet into her high heels. "If you'd calm down, you'd realize I'm right. I need to do this my way."

"Calm down? Calm down?" He put his hands on his hips and shifted his weight before throwing his arm back, throwing his jacket in disgust and anger knocking over a glass figurine on her dresser and sending it crashing to the floor. "How the hell can you sit there so calmly asking me to 'calm down' when you're getting ready to go out and… and 'God knows what' with this man you've obviously slept with before! Had a relationship with! I'm not about to sit here and let you…let you-" He caught the words on his tongue but the fire in her eyes let him know it was too late.

"Let me what, Jack?" Irina rose furiously off the bed. "Let me 'whore myself out'…isn't that what you were about to say, Jack?"

"Irina that's not-" Jack noticed the tears forming her eyes and tried lamely to deflect the truth as he took a step closer.

"Just... Stop." She put her hand out to stop him and looked away attempting to hide her unshed tears and took a step away from him grabbing her purse and side stepping him to get through the door.

The crunch of shattered glass under her feet spurring Jack from his daze at what just transpired.

"Irina!" Jack called after her, chasing her as she bound down the steps and into the kitchen where the other three remained frozen in place having heard the entire conversation and shattering glass. "Irina, Look at me…please?" Jack called again, stopping on the opposite side of the kitchen, glancing briefly at the others in the room.

"Sydney could you please?" Irina turned her back to Sydney once again to have her daughter zip up her dress, ignoring Jack.

"Irina!" Jack shouted, his anger rising as the situation was rapidly going out of control.

"Jack, I'm not having this conversation with you now." She shook her head and made her way to the refrigerator where she grabbed her insulin and supplies.

"Yes. We are." Jack walked quickly around the counter towards her and stopped just short of contact when she gave him a warning glare and given that she still held the sharp needle in her hand like a weapon, he proceeded cautiously. "Irina, why didn't you tell me 'before' all of this what your relationship was with this man?"

"What difference would it have made, Jack?" She bit the cap off the needle and jammed it into her arm with such force it made them all flinch. There would definitely be a bruise there tomorrow.

"It would have made all the difference!" Jack took his chances and edged closer, the anger in his voice rising.

"Oh bullshit, Jack!" She threw the empty syringe onto the counter. "You knew before we left what my relationship with Dubey had been, even if I didn't spell it out! We're here because you know as well as I do, that he has the information we need."

"Had been." Jack repeated choosing to concentrate on that particular part of the sentence.

"Yes, 'had been' as in past tense. He's in the past." Irina rolled her eyes. "You're my past…but also my present and future."

"Well, he sure as hell isn't in the past, Irina! He's right here! Right now with his giant hands and muscles all over you, just frothing at the mouth to get you in the sack again!"

"Jack, if you weren't so jealous," She moved to the opposite side of the kitchen island again. "You'd realize how ridiculous you sound! I have a past! Yes, more then half of my life was spent without you! Years before I met you, years after I thought I'd lost you forever… You don't know how hard it was to be alone without you…wanting you like I do… and… I'm sorry that you're hurt by this really I am." Her tone softened as she went on even if her posture did not. "But are you really going to keep punishing me every time something from my past you don't like comes up?"

"If your intentions aren't to seduce him, to lead him on, then why are you wearing that dress? The one he 'loves to take off' of you?" Jack threw accusingly at her, so wrapped up in his own jealousy, thinking about another man spending years making love to his wife, that he was missing the underlying message of Irina's words.

"The dress! The fucking dress, Jack?" Irina laughed bitterly through blinding tears and ran upstairs, thrashed around in her closet for a moment and came stalking back down the stairs, throwing a little red dress in Jack's face, surprising and scaring the others in the room caught in the middle of this circling duo.

"There's your goddamn fucking dress you, jealous son-of-a-bitch!" She shook her head, holding back the tears and looked at him in disgust. "After all that we've been through these last months I can't believe you'd still think so little of me… Have so little faith in me, in my love for you, in us! That you can believe I would actually sleep with another man after all we've been through to find each other again… Not to mention its not physically possible right now as I just gave birth to _your _baby just weeks ago!" Irina continued to look at him, still shaking her head and wrapping her arms around herself in comfort as a single tear escaped and made its way down her cheek before she angrily wiped it away. Her face melding into the stoic, terrifying look of 'The Man' as she regained control and they heard the doorbell ring announcing the car had arrived. "Next time, check your male ego at the door, Jack, and remember I'm doing this for us, you idgiot." Her accent coming out strong as her dark eyes bore into his. "You don't know how hard it is to be a woman in love with you, when you're so cruel." She turned on her heel and was out the door before anyone could form a reaction.

Weiss and Vaughn gave Sydney a sympathetic look as they were leaving, seeing the tears streaming down her cheeks at having just witnessed her parents first real fight in her life and now they were leaving her with the culprit of the emotional upheaval and a screaming baby who'd been awoken during the screaming match of their parents. The look they gave Jack wasn't as sympathetic.

When they reached the limo, Irina was already seated in the back, staring out the window at the waves crashing into the beach under the moonlight. Weiss caught the glimmer of the tear tracks on her face as the limo pulled away from the house and handed Irina a handkerchief from his jacket pocket.

"Thank you." She smiled after dabbing her cheeks dry and snapping the vanity mirror closed above her, having just re-applied her lipstick and touching up her make-up, the mask of 'absolute confidence' firmly in place. "Let's do this." She nodded handing the handkerchief back to Weiss just as the limo stopped and the bellhop opened her door.

_***I Like The Way You Move***_

"Irina," Dubey took her hand and helped her from the car, a flash of smile and a hint of disappointment in his voice. "Where is my dress?"

"I'm afraid that dress's days were numbered." She met Weiss and Vaughns' eyes as they came around the corner of the car, sharing the hidden meaning of those words before smiling apologetically at Dubey.

"Well no matter, My Dear," Dubey kissed the corner of her mouth with a smile. Irina could smell the alcohol already on his breath. "You would still be breathtaking wearing a rice sack."

"Thank you…you're very kind, Vijay." Irina took the arm he offered her as they made there way inside the club. She could tell by the way he was acting he was already drunk from drinking all day at the beach.

"Oh come now, Irina, modesty doesn't become you!" He laughed as his hand slid down her back to brush over her ass, "You know you're drop dead gorgeous." He nodded at people, acknowledging them as they made their way through the club, everyone smiling and giving him their approving looks on his 'date.'

Irina reached behind her and slid his hand up and away from her ass, much to the surprise of Dubey.

"I didn't come here for that, Vijay." She released his arm as they were shown to the private room upstairs overlooking the crowd below.

Weiss and Vaughn were seated on the opposite side of his 'goons' at the edge of the room.

"That'…is what you 'always' come for, Irina. Among other things." Dubey shot her a dubious look as they took their seats at a small table with candlelight and a bottle of champagne already chilling.

"Not this time. I told you time changes things." She grasped his hand lying on the table and gave his fingers a light squeeze, the look in her eyes telling him 'it was over.' "I came to discuss you repaying the debt you owe."

"Time does not change things for me." He picked up her hand and kissed it, ignoring her protest that it was over between them. "As for business details, that can wait 'til after we've eaten. I'm starved," He began nibbling the skin up her arm with kisses a move that used to charm her, now making her want to vomit thinking about Jack and the earlier fight. "And I haven't seen you in almost three years. Right now, I just want to drink champagne and look at you." He winked at her as he poured them both a glass.

"Water for me please." She grabbed the waiter's arm on the way by. She just wanted this night to be over with already. Irina was rushing things and she knew it but didn't care, to hell with her plans. She'd improvise.

"Irina…water? What's with you tonight?" Dubey shook his head and held out the flute to her.

"No thank you." Irina reclaimed her arm and sat back in her chair. "I can't drink alcohol right now." She looked down to her chest briefly, remembering she had to go home soon and feed her child.

"Oh, right." Dubey's eyes lingering with lust on the heaves of exposed cleavage before him. "The baby."

"Yes." Irina nodded and sipped her water under the man's stare.

"Such the good little mother now, aren't you?" He mocked her with a smile and swig of the champagne. "You never did tell me what the arrangement with the child's father is?"

"No, I didn't." Irina stone walled him, taking a bite of salad that was put in front of her.

"That's it. You've nothing to say? Is he the reason for your sudden change of heart?" He slid his chair closer to hers, caressing the knee that was exposed when she crossed her legs.

"The sudden change of heart is not so sudden. My life has changed considerably in the last couple of years. But I told you before, my personal life is off limits." Irina felt her skin crawling under the man's touch, the smell of the alcohol on his breath suddenly nauseating being in this uncomfortable position.

"You have another daughter with the American." Dubey gave her a harsh look, feeling her retreating. "You've never talked about her."

"It was none of your concern and still isn't. Like I said, my personal life is off limits." She picked up his hand and flung it off her leg, taking a drink. "I'm not here to discuss me, I'm here to discuss the debt you owe me."

"Irina, like I said. It can wait until after we've eaten." He sat back as the waiter placed the entrees in front of them. "Besides, there is so much to catch up on…discuss…like the rumor going around that you're now working for the CIA." He cocked his head and downed his flute of champagne, his eyes never leaving hers.

"The CIA executed me, remember?" She remained sitting where she was, legs crossed and leaned back in her chair, cool, calm and collected. She'd anticipated this line of questioning. "I would never work for the CIA. I can't believe you of all people…believing in idle gossip." She cocked her head slowly to the other side, the grin on her face becoming the enigma she was famous for. She had told him the truth. She would never work 'for' the CIA, but she'd work 'with' them. "I'm work for no one but myself and the interests of my country."

"So I've heard Tsarina." He offered her a silent toast, trusting her word about the CIA for now. "You're secret identity has been revealed. Now what?"

"It changes nothing." She deflected the question, "I am still working for the same goals I was before which brings me back to my original question." She leaned forward closing the distance. " You owe me."

"What is it that you want?" Dubey's hand found its way under the table to caress Irina's thigh through her slit.

Weiss elbowed Vaughn in the ribs as they watched the brave, stupid, drunk man making a move on Irina when she was clearly not in the mood.

"Oh, he's going down." Weiss smiled across the room at Dubey's goons and whispered to Vaughn through pursed lips. Watching Dubey's hand climb further up Irina's dress. "Yep, he's going down."

"Zamir." Irina replied flatly, conscious of where his hand was. He grabbed the champagne bottle and took a drink directly from it. The night was not going the way he intended. "Where is he?" Irina squeezed her crossed, thighs together tightly clasping her hand over his, preventing his hand from climbing any higher.

"What could you possibly want with him? As I seem recall…it wasn't so long ago that he came looking for you and you sent a message, via your sister that he should, 'go to hell' and that he was to never contact you again. So, so," He shook his head, the effects of the alcohol taking hold. "What do you want with him?"

"That's my business." Irina replied smoothly, grabbing his fingers in hers and twisting them off and away from her thigh. Trying very hard to keep her cool and not turn this into a disaster. "I've already told you nicely. Next time, I won't be so polite. Please, stop touching me."

* * *

Jack had stood there motionless as he watched Irina leave. When the door clicked shut behind Vaughn, Jack looked down to the red dress in his hands and then up to Sydney; the tears in her eyes doing nothing to calm the anger in his veins at the situation.

Sydney continued to stare at him, momentarily in a daze, before looking at the baby monitor on the counter relaying her sister's screams and making a move to get her.

"I'll get her." Jack grabbed Sydney's arm as she tried to pass him, stopping her in her tracks, his grip a little too tight.

"I don't think that will help," Sydney's moment of hurt and fear turning into anger, "You're the one that scared her. You're scaring me." She looked down to where he was still gripping her arm tightly.

Jack released it instantly, as if only now realizing what he was doing.

"What are you doing, Dad?" She looked him in the eye asking the bigger question. "After everything we've been through with Mom. Everything that's happened. How could you do that to her?" She could feel the tears stinging in her eyes as she looked at her father still boiling with rage.

_***Cry Me A River***_

"Do that to her, Sydney? What about what it's doing to me? Where is the understanding for me?" Jack fisted the red dress in his hand shaking it in the air. "She tells me nothing about this relationship with him, and then out of nowhere, this man gropes and kisses my wife while I am forced to sit there and watch! And now I'm the bad guy because I'm upset with her and the situation? I have a right to be upset!" He yelled and the baby screamed louder.

"You have a right to be upset! You don't have the right to be a cruel ass!" Sydney glared at him and ran up the stairs.

"Argh!" Jack yelled in frustration and grabbed the dress with both hands, ripped it into pieces throwing it onto the floor. He grabbed a bottle of vodka out of the living room bar and stomped outside muttering to himself. He was a half-mile down the beach before he dropped into the sand, facing the ocean.

A little more then a mile down the beach, he could see the lights of the nightclub where Irina was currently with Dubey. He snorted in disgust as distorted waves of music drifted up the coastline. Digging his feet into the sand, still warm from the day's sun, Jack twisted off the top of the bottle and held it to the club in the distance as if offering it and the occupants inside a sarcastic toast. The clear liquid was anything but cool in the heat of the night and Jack drank greedily trying to stop the images his brain was conjuring up with Irina and Dubey.

Jack remembered Irina's face from earlier. The tears. He didn't care if he'd caused them. He was hurting, too. He'd known somewhere in the back of his mind that Irina had obviously had other sexual relationships in the past twenty years, he had, too. But to come face to face with one of them, a man who had shared in what was his, made Jack sick. This wasn't one of the men who'd savagely raped her against her will. This was someone she gave herself to willingly again and again. Someone she enjoyed.

His eyes drifted back down the beach towards the massive expanse of Irina's beachside mansion and he wondered how many times had Dubey had his wife inside those walls or on the beach he sat on now. Jack shook his head and drank until his throat burned. The women he'd had over the years were just for the need of sexual release, something to try and fill the void. Sex and just sex. He was not interested in making love with any of them. He'd set clearly defined boundaries with the women before they'd even started and for the most part, it was a mutually beneficial 'fucking' system…strictly sex with no whispered words of love and gentle caresses. The only emotions exchanged, that of primal need.

After 'Laura,' he didn't think it was possible to ever 'make love' to a woman again. He didn't want to. Like doing so would some how take away the memory of what was and what wasn't.

For so many years he questioned whether they'd ever 'really made love' or 'was it all part of her seduction act?' Even as his brain told him that's all it was, sex to her, somewhere in his heart, it was telling him that what they shared was much more then that.

Finding out now, that Irina had spent a significant part of time with one man raised questions in Jack's mind whether or not what they'd shared had meant the same to her as it did him? How could it be so easy for her to make love to someone else? He took another drink and lay back in the sand; looking up at the stars he closed his eyes and let the vodka fill his empty stomach. His mind flashed back to the image of Irina standing there tonight, with tears in her eyes throwing the dress at him.

She said he had 'no idea how hard it was for her to be alone without him, wanting him like she did.' Did that mean she'd felt the same void in her heart that he had when she'd left? That Dubey was nothing more then what those women had been to him? Someone to fill the sexual void and nothing more?

Jack sighed and thought over the events of the night letting the vodka swirl the images clouding his mind and heart: his and Irina's previous lives and the discussions they'd already had about the past and the future.

* * *

Nightclub in Jakarta:

**_*#1 Crush*_**

"His activities of late haven't exactly been what we call ethical even in our line of business, Irina. He and I didn't exactly part on the best of terms either. Over you actually." Dubey looked into her eyes.

"Over me?" She shifted in her chair, crossing her legs the other way, wondering how she could have come between the two.

"Yes, you." He continued to eye her quizzically. "Before the CIA captured you. You were kidnapped by a man, Arvin Sloane from your home in Russia, yes?"

"Yes," Irina felt her heart race in her chest. "How-" she stopped, rephrasing the question as the 'how' he knew no longer mattered. "What do you know?"

"Zamir came to me a few months ago, wanting to know if I'd meet with a man, Sloane, someone he'd just previously done business with about some money transactions and trafficking." He looked up at her with almost apologetic eyes. "I'd heard of the man, and was interested so I agreed."

Irina tensed slightly, sat upright and leaned forward to rest her chin on her hands, staring Dubey directly in the eye. "What did he want?"

"I was in Calcutta at the time, visiting my family so he met me there." Dubey stabbed a piece of salad and continued eating. "Sloane wanted to know if I could launder and route substantial funds to two separate, untraceable accounts. He knew of my business. Knew what I was capable of." He gave her a smug grin as he flicked his wrist asking the waiter to bring more champagne.

"Sloane's a smart man; why have you launder money he could have done himself?" Irina began the questioning on her fishing expedition of the truth.

"One of the people receiving funds was a high-ranking member of the United State Senate. The other a known member of Al-Qaeda. There could be no link to either of them or him he explained."

'Senator Douglas' Irina sighed, her instincts about Zamir and his connection to Douglas and Sloane confirmed. "And the trafficking?"

"He told me he'd have 'something' at a later date that he wanted me to sell for him on the Black Market."

_Lena_. Irina's heart dropped to the floor, as did Weiss and Vaughn's.

At the look on Irina's fallen face Dubey continued, "I can tell by the look on your face, Irina. That you know what Sloane was going to have me sell don't you?" He reached across the table and took his hand in hers.

Irina looked up from where their hands lay connected on the table into his eyes, "My baby."

"Yes, though I did not know that when I accepted the deal. Believe me I would never." He ran his thumb over the back of her hand, "It was only after I'd learned that it was the bastard Zamir who'd led Sloane to where you were in hiding that you'd been kidnapped, were pregnant. Which of course was a tremendous surprise. But I did not know until then that it was, you, Irina. That it was your child that this man wanted me to sell. I would never sell a baby." His hand now working its way up her arm.

Irina sat deathly still listening to what he was saying, the reality of how close she'd come to losing her daughter that Sloane wasn't lying when he said he would sell her baby.

"The moment I knew it was you that Sloane had kidnapped, I tried to find you but I found out too late. The next I'd heard was that the CIA had found you, and that you'd been executed-"

"By the Senator you'd arranged funds for, Vijay." She said vehemently pulling her hand free from his grasp once again, "Oh don't look so surprised, Dubey! I know how you work! You don't do 'anything' without investigating first! You 'knew' who he was!"

"Not at the time, I swear to you, Irina! I did not know!" Dubey stood and slammed his hand down on the table in his drunken state, making the silverware jump and Weiss and Vaughn ready themselves to get up and attack.

In one swift move Irina grabbed a stiletto knife from the upper thigh of her garter belt and thrust it down at incredible speed, pinning his shirt to the table.

"You crazy bitch!" Dubey tugged on his shirt attempting to free it, wild fire in his eyes. "What are you doing?"

"There are two things that I will not stand for: my life and that of my family being threatened! The other is a man who attempts to intimidate me with force! I gave you a warning." She held the knife in place, leaning closer to his face with hers, a deadly smile still in place.

Weiss and Vaughn stood, with hands on their firearms ready to proceed if things continued to get out of control.

"Keep your drunken hands off me! The next time, it will be your hand that is stuck to this table! And as someone who's experienced that lately, it's a very unpleasant feeling." She ripped the knife free of his shirt and the table.

Dubey in his inebriated, aroused, angry state took no heed in Irina's warning and knocked the knife out of her hand sending it sliding across the floor with one hand while the back of his other hand hit soundly with the side of her face. Her head hardly had time to whip back before he held her securely in his grip with one hand around her wrist and the other around her throat.

Vaughn and Weiss immediately flew from their seats, as did Dubey's guards, weapons drawn.

Irina gave them a look to 'stand down,' sending the silent message she was still in control. They kept their guns trained but remained where they stood.

"I am not one of your minions, Irina! You cannot use me and toss me aside when you're done! Don't you know I would die for you?" Dubey's tight grip lessoned as he saw the split in her cheek and lip already drawing pools of blood. He drew her body closer to his and twisted her arm behind her back and slid his other arm down her neck and breast grasping her other arm and twisting it behind her back as well. He leaned her back so that he had access to her neck and started kissing his way up to her chin and over her now swollen cheek and lips.

As soon as his lips locked with hers, Irina sent her knee straight into his groin causing him to immediately withdraw in agony as she crushed her elbow into the side of his face sending him stumbling a few steps.

"You bitch!" His eyes tearing, his face etched in pain as his nose and lip spewed blood. He attempted to smile as if enjoying their game.

When Irina took a step closer, he attempted to grab her. She used Dubey's momentum to deflect his advance and dislocate his own shoulder with a sickening 'pop' before landing on top of his chest, her legs pinning him down to the floor, her arms holding his above his head so that he was trapped.

Dubey's eye's wandered from her thighs, inches from his face, up her body to rest on her face, swollen and bleeding.

The speed and agility in which Irina pulled off the maneuver astounding Weiss and Vaughn who still stood with guns trained.

"Why can't you ever play fair?" He smiled, enjoying his position even though he was in excruciating pain.

"I follow my own rules." She huffed and blew a wayward strand of hair from her face. "You should know that by now." Annoyed, she looked at her dress where the slit had now risen another five inches up her thigh due to tearing.

"Yes. I do." He continued to breath heavily his eyes dropping to her cleavage right in front of him, the feel of her body on his sending a wave of arousal straight through him.

"And you hit me first." She backhanded him across the already broken nose again causing blood to spray again.

"Goddamnit!" Dubey cursed again from pain. "Irina, stop it!"

"That was for hitting a woman. Especially this woman. Never, make that mistake again. Can I trust that you won't try to kill me again if I let you up to finish this discussion?" She pressed her knee into the armpit of the dislocated arm eliciting a moan from him. "Or if you keep this up I'm in a fighting mood tonight and can't guarantee I won't stop short of killing you."

Truth be told, she was thankful for this chance to beat the crap out of someone after all the pent up frustration with Jack. Part of her wanted Dubey to keep attacking her.

"You know I could never kill you, Irina." Dubey winked at her wiggling his body beneath her. "It used to be fun. You and I challenging each other, or has time changed that about you, too? Your love of games?"

Irina promptly jumped to her feet and attempted to straighten her dress. "I'm too tired for games, Vijay." She watched as he rolled over and got to his feet, their guards relaxing and lowering their guns. "No more games." She took a seat and grabbed her glass of ice water and held it to her split, swollen cheek. Hoping the cool nature would reduce the swelling. "I need to find Zamir, so I can find Sloane and end this thing once and for all."

"And then what?" He asked dropping into the chair again cradling his arm.

"I don't know." Her mind suddenly flashed to Jack and the unknown future.

Within seconds she was back on task, "Sloane stole something from me that threatens my future. My daughters' future, all our futures and I want them back." She twisted the stem of glass between her fingers, letting the cold condensation slide over her hot swollen cheek as she thought about the Prophecy Child. "Zamir has information that could be helpful in finding Sloane."

Dubey remained silent, staring at her for a moment before he sighed and gave her a half smile causing him to wince in pain.

"Ok Irina. I will see what I can't find out for you. I'll contact you tomorrow." He winced again as he struggled to stand, while his one arm hung grotesquely at his side.

"Thank you." She offered him a small smile as they walked back to the awaiting limo.

"I meant what I said before, Irina. Nothing has changed for me where you're concerned. Even if you've had a change of heart. What ever makes you happy, I will help you." He kissed her cheek and lightly caressed her cheek before catching himself and letting his hand drop. "For all the years I was blessed with your body it was your heart that I always wanted the most." He said in a low voice that those around them could still hear, including Vaughn and Weiss who felt very awkward in the moment. "I could tell by the look in your eyes that you couldn't give me your heart because it was no longer yours to give."

Irina looked down and away from his eyes boring into hers, looking for the truth he knew was there.

"I hope that Jack Bristow knows and appreciates what a precious gift you have given him."

Irina's eyes flew to his instantly. He knew. He knew about Jack. That she'd given her heart to him long ago. Where it remained today.

"The illusive heart of Irina Derevko is nothing that should be taken lightly." He smiled down at her, taking a chance and stepping closer.

"How did you…" The question died on her lips.

"Know that it was Jack Bristow who you'd given your heart to?" When she nodded yes he smiled and laughed softly. "When I'd heard you were pregnant I was astounded. The Great Irina Derevko pregnant with some man's child? How could this be? She would never let that happen! But ah… then I discovered it wasn't just some man that fathered the child but 'The American.' It was his child… and I just knew." He clasped her hand in his holding it up to his heart. "Irina Derevko would never have a child with just any man. Not even me. For you to carry his child, have his child, again… I knew that he was the one who held your heart, would always."

No verbal response was required, as the light in Irina's eyes spoke volumes to him and she smiled despite the own pain of her swollen cheek.

"Give that beautiful baby of yours a kiss from me." He winked and kissed the back of Irina's hand before holding open the limo door with his one good working arm. "I'll be in touch tomorrow but now, I need to see a doctor." He laughed making Irina smile as she got into the back of the car. "It was a good game, Irina. Goodnight." He gave her a small smiling, accepting that their game was finally over.

"Goodnight." She smiled and nodded as he closed the door and the car slowly crept away from the curb into the night.

* * *

"Mom! What happened?" Sydney jumped from the couch the moment they'd walked in the door, seeing Irina's torn dress and swollen, bruised cheek.

"I'm alright, Sweetheart." Irina smiled slightly, brushing Sydney's chin with her fingers as she passed by her on the way to the refrigerator. "It just takes a little action for some men to realize that you're serious." She opened the freezer and removed a package of frozen peas, placing it against her cheek to reduce the swelling. When she turned to face them, she noticed the remains of her shredded red dress on the floor. "Where's your father?" She asked quietly, pouring herself a glass of orange juice and popping a piece of toast in the toaster. She hadn't eaten much of anything at the restaurant and was feeling a big 'sluggish' now with low blood sugar.

"I haven't seen him since you left." Sydney looked cautiously at her mother as Irina made her way around the kitchen island to pick up the dress pieces and throw them into the trash. "I think he went for a walk on the beach."

Irina didn't bother responding, as she heard the baby stirring in her sleep through the monitor. She picked up her frozen peas, and glass of OJ with a smile, hearing her babies squeaks and noises that newborns made in their sleep. Making her way towards the stairs she grazed Sydney with a kiss to her cheek as she passed. "I'm going to check on Lena, I'll be back down in a minute. Thank you for watching her."

When Irina had closed the door behind her Sydney turned to Weiss and Vaughn who looked positively exhausted as they flopped onto the couch.

"What the hell happened tonight?"

"Your mom kicked some Dubey ass! That's what happened." Weiss loosened his tie with a chuckle thinking about Irina's assault on the man.

"Why?" She flopped down next to Vaughn who put his arm around her, kissing her temple with a smile.

"Because the man wasn't listening. He was drunk and stupid, and kept putting the moves on Irina. She told him to stop, he didn't and well things got intense there for a few minutes but holy shit, your mom in action! She's lethal, Syd!" Weiss laughed out loud as he got up to grab a beer out of the fridge. "And quite capable of taking on the 'Incredible Hulk.'"

"Why did he hit her?" Sydney looked to Vaughn with concern written all over her face.

"She threatened him with her stiletto." He added softly with a small smirk.

"Yeah." Weiss handed both of them a beer as he sat down, "A night on the town with Irina Derevko is a night to remember, of that you can be sure. The way she lures her victims into her web is like watching a Black Widow spider seduce her mate before she devours him. I see now where you get it from when you're in the field."

A Praying Mantis and Marshall suddenly flashed through their minds remembering his previous comments concerning Irina. He raised a knowing eyebrow at Sydney, who smiled, before taking a swig of the cold beer.

"So did we learn anything more about where to find Zamir? Did Dubey know where he is?" Sydney asked just as Irina hit the bottom of the stairs landing.

"He's going to contact me tomorrow with whatever information he can give us." Irina answered for them. She saw Sydney's face immediately go blank, and followed her line of sight to where Jack had just entered through the sliding glass doors behind her, empty vodka bottle in hand.

Jack's eyes immediately flashed with concern and then anger as Irina turned around, exposing her torn dress, and split cheek.

"What the hell did he do to you?" His voice was low and seethed with anger as his knuckles turned white gripping the bottle. He stumbled forward and it became abundantly clear that he was drunk.

"Nothing I couldn't handle." Irina replied tightly, as she walked calmly towards the kitchen counter placing her now empty glass in the sink.

"That's not what I asked!" Jack moved into her space, turning her face to his so that he could look more closely at the damage of her face and then to the torn dress, immediately thinking the worst. "What did he do to you? And what the hell kind of bodyguards are you two?" He flashed his anger towards Vaughn and Weiss who were now standing cautiously in the living room.

"He didn't do anything like that, Jack! Don't jump to conclusions and don't blame the boys!" She stepped away from him. "You don't know what happened."

"That's right! I don't know what happened because I wasn't there! I wasn't there because you didn't want me there! Because you don't want me apparently! You do just fine on your own it seems!" He rambled on throwing the bottle into the sink where it shattered, making everyone jump except Irina who remained deathly still at the other end of the island.

"I'm not having this discussion with you right now. I've already had to deal with one drunken idgiot tonight." She shook her head slightly as she closed her eyes, thinking about how very wrong this was going down.

"How wrong of me to assume that your lover boy might have hurt you when you come home with a bloodied, bruised face and a torn dress!"

Weiss, Vaughn and Sydney cringed with Jack's verbal abuse.

Jack turned his glare on her; the alcohol making his tongue wicked.

"What the hell am I supposed to think? Did the foreplay get a little out of hand, Irina? Hmm?"

_***So Cold***_

"I'm sorry." Irina said softly as her eyes met his, surprising Jack momentarily with an admission he was not expecting. "I'm sorry that I hurt you so badly in the past that you're incapable of trusting me now." She reached into the front of her dress, removing a small black chip that had been clipped there. She plugged it into the end of the iPod lying in front of her on the counter.

No one saying anything as they were all stunned by what she was saying and doing, unsure of her next move.

Slowly, and with unshed tears she slid the diamond ring from her lithe finger and set it atop the iPod screen, looking up to meet Jack's surprised eyes she gently pushed them toward him.

"I love you with all that I am and it's still not enough. I don't know what else I can do, say to you, to gain it back. I cannot, will not…make another promise before God to renew our marriage vows without your trust. I know you love me but that's not enough for a marriage to work. We both know that. We need complete trust in one another."

Jack's posture had fallen with her every action, every word.

"This doesn't mean I'm giving up on us, Jack. It just means, I think… Everything happened so fast in these last few months. Maybe we need to take things slower. Before we can even think about a future together…we need to deal with past. Need to rebuild that trust." She paused momentarily to collect herself and straighten her own posture, blinking back the unshed tears. "I've made it a habit in my line of work to record every meeting with a contact for safety measures. Since you don't trust my word on what happened this evening you can listen for yourself." Her dark pools seemed to swallow any further emotion she was in danger of exposing. "Goodnight." She turned slowly and headed straight for the stairs without looking at anyone.

The remaining group stood motionless as they watched Irina's retreating form until she disappeared, their gaze then fell to Jack. He stood in a daze, trying to clear the alcohol induced fog on his brain enough to process all that had just happened.

Slowly he reached forward and picked up the ring, still warm from Irina's body heat. It suddenly felt very heavy and as Jack closed his fingers around the small platinum band, it felt as though it was searing his flesh, sending a shooting pain straight up his arm to his heart.

Sydney looked tearfully from her father to the closed door upstairs and back to Vaughn. Silently asking him to deal with her father while she went to Irina. Vaughn kissed her temple and motioned for her to go ahead. She walked slowly at first, and then ascended the steps quickly impatient to reach her mother.

Jack's mind suddenly registered that he was not alone in the room and looked up to meet Vaughn and Weiss's gaze. The looks on their faces held no anger only surprised sadness. He quickly picked up the iPod and went out to the solace of the beach once more.

"Wow. What a night." Weiss dropped back onto the couch in shock covering his face with his hands rubbing the sleep away. "So what do you think about all this?' He asked Vaughn softly.

"Well, I can understand why it's hard for Jack to trust her to some extent, but after everything…" He paused and stood, thinking about his words. "When he listens to that tape, I don't know." He furrowed his brow, "I don't want to try and analyze their relationship. It's far too complicated and it's not fair to do. We've never been in their positions." He walked toward the kitchen and began looking through the cupboards.

"What are you doing?" Weiss watched with amusement when he saw Vaughn grab a frying pan and some eggs.

"Irina hasn't had a chance to eat yet. It's not good for her." He answered quietly knowing without looking at Weiss what the expression on his face would be: one of shock and astonishment. He too, had to admit how ironic this was, him concerned for the woman he once despised more then anyone on Earth, wanted dead.

"Very noble, Mike, very noble." Weiss slapped on the back and squeezed his shoulder, taking another swig of beer with a bemused smile. "Never hurts to suck up to your future mother-in-law."

Vaughn gave him an incredulous look and shrugged it off, "It's taken a while but I've finally realized that when Irina's in-danger, sick, or hurting, in pain…unhappy… Sydney's unhappy, Sydney's in pain and because I love her, I'll do whatever I can to make sure that doesn't happen. And if that means cooking something for Irina to keep her healthy, then so be it. Besides I'm hungry, too." He added smiling, trying to lighten up. "Now do you want some or not?"

"Mom." Sydney knocked and called out softly, hearing no reply she braved entry. When she stepped into the room she saw Irina on the phone, speaking in Russian and wiggling out of her dress.

Lena was lying on the middle of the bed, eyes wide open mesmerized at the moment by the light and ceiling fan. Sydney sat gently beside her sister on the bed and smiled at the innocence the baby held, discovering the world around her and that included something as simple as a ceiling fan.

From the bits of conversation Sydney was catching as Irina made her way in and out of the bathroom and around the room, her mother was on the phone with Katya. She gave Irina a small smile as she caught her eyes in the mirror. Realizing Irina could be on the phone for some time, Sydney lay down on the bed with her head next to Lena's and looked up to see what fascination the ceiling fan held. To her surprise, it was actually beautiful. The blades were made of woven bamboo strips and as they moved in their circular motion, cut the light into intricate patterns of light and shadow across the ceiling and walls like a silent ballet. Sydney couldn't stop smiling as she nuzzled her cheek against Lena's head, lying on their mother's soft bed appreciating the small, but beautiful things she still had in her life.

As Sydney was busy thinking about the events of the night and watching the fan, Irina finished on the phone and stood watching her daughters from the doorway.

The baby began wiggling and punching her fists in the air, making small noises in an attempt to get away from Sydney's hair that was splayed across the bed, tickling her face. Sydney caught a fist to the side of the head that grabbed her attention and she rolled over onto her side, propping her head up on an elbow to laugh as Lena was flailing about with a fist full of her hair. She caught her mother's gaze from the doorway and was pleased to see Irina smiling.

"I forgot to warn you she's become quite the hair puller." Irina walked toward the bed smiling, and gently slid up beside them in her pajamas. She ran her hand over Lena's cheek as Sydney extracted her hair from the small fist.

Sydney looked up to closely analyze her mother's swollen cheek and the small laceration.

"Are you ok?" She asked softly, meaning so much more then the physical damage.

"No. Not really." Irina answered honestly feeling tears well again she took a deep breath and blinked them back smiling at her eldest. "But I will be."

Sydney was a little surprised her mother had answered truthfully, admitting she wasn't just fine, which was the answer she fully expected.

"Dad really does love you." She said softly.

"I know he does, Sydney. As I love him but love isn't always enough. I've learned that too many times in my life." Irina sighed and ran her fingernail up the bottom of Lena's bare foot causing the baby to retract it and then kick out.

A soft knock at the door interrupted their quiet conversation.

"Come in." Sydney called turning their attention to the door. Vaughn smiled shyly as he carried a plate of scrambled eggs and fresh toast over to the bed.

"You haven't eaten anything in a while." He carefully set the plate and utensils on the table near the bed. Sydney beamed at Vaughn's gesture.

"Thank you." Irina turned on the bed to clasp Vaughn's hand with a beautiful smile of her own. "That was very kind of you to think of me."

"You're welcome." He nodded with a small smile as he nervously retracted his hand and shifted his eyes to Sydney. His own heart surged with love when he saw the brilliant smile on her face. "Sydney, do you want some as well? I can go get another plate? I didn't even think to ask-" He rambled but was cut off.

"No, its ok. I'm not hungry but thanks for asking." She smiled. "I'll come down in a little bit."

"No hurry, I'm not going anywhere." He smiled softly as he closed the door behind him.

Irina's smile continued to grow as she watched her daughter's reaction, the brilliant smile her daughter had was nothing to take for granted. She'd never forget the first time she was on the receiving end of it after she'd turned herself in again.

"What?" Sydney blushed under her mother's obvious scrutiny of the situation.

"Nothing." Irina smiled as she propped herself up and stabbed at some eggs. "I just love that you're so happy."

Sydney's smile suddenly faded at her mother's words, remembering what had happened between her parents tonight and suddenly feeling guilty for being so happy.

Irina noticed the reaction and immediately knew what Sydney was thinking. She set her fork on the plate and cupped Sydney's chin, forcing her eyes up to hers.

"Sydney, you have nothing to feel guilty about. You are allowed to be happy, you deserve all the happiness and love this world has to offer."

"I know but-"

"No buts, Sydney." Irina smiled and ran her thumb over Sydney's cheek before pushing a stray hair behind her ear. "When you're happy, I'm happy. I love you Sweetheart, I love you so much." Irina looked Sydney in the eye and felt the tears starting again. She set the plate on the table and took Sydney's hand. "And I love that you have such a big heart that you always try and put other's heart before your own. You're best person I've ever had the pleasure of knowing." She pulled Sydney into her embrace where they both held on tightly to each other. "You are my everything and there isn't a moment that goes by when I don't 'Thank God' for bringing us back together."

"But if you and Dad don't…" Sydney said spoke through her tears into Irina's soft hair, expressing her fears that if her parents couldn't find a way back to each other, her mother would disappear again.

Irina knew what she'd been thinking though she didn't finish her thought and kissed the side of Sydney's head as she sniffled.

"I swear to you, Sydney, that I will never let anyone or anything tear us apart again. Your father and I are by no means over and even if we decide that its for the best we live our lives separately; I'm still going to be your mother and you'll always be my baby no matter how old you get. My love for you will never change."

Sydney pulled back and nodded as she wiped the tears on her cheeks and chin.

Irina realized as she watched her daughter that even though Sydney didn't verbally express it like Jack had, she too was afraid her mother would break her trust again and leave her. She sighed and pulled Sydney back into her arms, closing her eyes. "I'm not going anywhere." She spoke softly into her daughter's hair.

It was going to take time to heal this family, no matter how much love there was but she had faith, that time heals all wounds. There would be scars left, that was a certainty and scars were made from skin that was even stronger then before. Irina believed that when all their wounds had healed, they too would be that much stronger.

"I believe you, Mom." Sydney smiled as she spoke to her mother in Russian. "I trust you." Somehow to Sydney, speaking to Irina in her own language seemed to re-affirm her words, that she really and truly gave Irina all her trust in that moment.

When the hug ended, they lay on the bed, one on each side facing the other, talking while Irina nursed Lena discussing what Dubey had revealed about Sloane and Zamir.

With that topic exhausted, and the baby now asleep between them, Irina revealed to Sydney what she'd been discussing on the phone with Katya. Sydney left them sometime later to find Vaughn and go to bed herself.

Meanwhile, Jack had stumbled down the beach just far enough away from the house that he could still see the light into Irina's bedroom. He'd sat down and pressed 'play' listening to the entire conversation of the night, which unfortunately began the moment Irina put on her dress and he'd accused her of being a whore even without finishing the sentence and all the way through the entire night with Dubey, and ending just after his remark about 'foreplay to rough' with her 'lover boy.' He shook his head in disgust with himself and flopped backwards into the sand, re-playing over and over sections of the dialogue, but mostly, the last thing that had been said between Dubey and Irina.

***Secret Garden***

_'For all the years I was blessed with your body it was your heart that I always wanted the most. I could tell by the look in your eyes that you couldn't give me your heart because it was no longer yours to give. I hope that Jack Bristow knows and appreciates what a precious gift you have given him. The illusive heart of Irina Derevko is nothing that should be taken lightly.'_

_ 'How did you know…?'_

_ 'Know that it was Jack Bristow who you'd given your heart to? When I'd heard you were pregnant I was astounded. The Great Irina Derevko pregnant with some man's child? How could this be? She would never let that happen! But ah, then I discovered it wasn't just some man that fathered the child… but 'The American.' It was his child and I just knew. Irina Derevko would never have a child with just any man not even me. For you to carry his child, have his child again… I knew that he was the one who held your heart, would always.'_

How had things gone so terribly wrong for he and Irina in the last twenty-four hours? In his heart, he knew without a doubt that she loved him, above all else except their children. It had been his head that had let the emotions and memories of the past creep in and take control over his emotion, resulting back to old habits of doubt and insecurity. He'd thought that after all they'd been through, those doubts…those insecurities had vanished. But with the first test of their relationship they'd proved him wrong. He hadn't dealt with them and somewhere they lay lurking, waiting for the first opportunity to strike out. Strike back at Irina for the pain she'd caused when she'd left. Of course he knew now the reasons but it didn't take away the memories from that time period and those were what he was struggling to let go of in his head. Somewhere inside him he needed that confirmation, that promise of where exactly he stood in Irina's life. What he meant to her. His brain had just heard from the recording, what his heart had already known. No matter what men were in her past, he was the only man in her present, and according to what Dubey had said, the only man she'd ever given her heart to. She'd left her heart with Jack when she left, just as she'd taken his with her back to Russia. Jack opened his fist, still clenching her ring. He held it up to the moon and watched the light bounce of the diamonds as he twisted it between his fingers. 'The illusive heart of Irina Derevko is nothing that should be taken lightly.' Dubey's words kept replaying in his head. Jack dropped his arm across his forehead, the other onto his chest where he palmed the ring to his chest just above his heart.

Irina had given him the one thing she'd never given to anyone else. The most guarded and fragile thing she possessed, her heart because she loved him. Trusted him and he'd ripped it out and thrown in back in her face tonight. Were they equal now? He wondered silently to himself. Did it make him feel any better to do to her, what she'd done to him twenty years ago? The answer was immediate to Jack. No, of course not.

Of course he didn't feel better because he'd hurt the one person he loved more then anything and when you love someone so deeply, you would do anything to keep them from harm. You certainly don't want to be the one to cause it!

It was amazing to Jack how quickly his drunken state had become clear when presented with the hard truth. He staggered to his feet, and slid Irina's ring onto the top of his little finger. He desperately wanted to talk to her, tell her he was sorry and it couldn't wait another moment.

Jack glanced up to her window as he walked toward the house, the main light had been turned off but he could see her balcony doors were open and the light breeze was causing the curtains to dance. Jack picked up his pace.

When he reached the house, it was quiet, everyone asleep and all the lights had been turned off except for a small light in the kitchen someone, probably Sydney, had left on to show him the way home in the dark. He quietly slipped through the doors and up the steps. Irina's door was closed. Jack placed his hand on the wooden door and rested his forehead against its grain, taking a deep breath.

What was he going to say? How was he going to make this right?

Slowly, he turned the handle and crept into the room. The Full Moon was beaming through the skylight and cast the entire space below in a brilliant shade of dark blue. His heart melted when his eyes fell upon two of the loves-of-his-life sleeping peacefully next to each other on top of the beautiful white down comforter. Irina's hand was splayed protectively across a sleeping Lena's stomach so that even in sleep, Irina would know exactly where her daughter was and if she was awake while in bed with her. She'd done it so many times with Sydney and whenever they'd brought Lena into bed with them the last few weeks. But something didn't look quite right to Jack, and then he realized why. His eyes shifted from the white band of un-tanned skin on Irina's left hand that was covering their baby, to the ring on the end of his little finger.

Jack had become accustomed to its presence in the last few days it had occupied her finger. He was about to slide the ring back on her finger when he suddenly stopped, looking down at Irina's sleeping face. He thought about what she'd said, that she 'could not, would not' renew her vows to him without his love and 'trust.'

Jack pulled back his outstretched hand slowly.

Irina was right. Things had happened so quickly these last few months. She had his love and his full trust now, though he was ashamed to admit even to himself, especially to himself, that it took her proving it to him with a digital voice recorder for his head to finally get in sync with the heart that had never stopped loving her. There were no more doubts, no more insecurities. He could just slip the ring back on her finger and apologize in the morning, asking her for forgiveness. He knew she'd give it because she felt she owed him so much, no matter how much he hurt her.

But in that moment, looking at her beautiful face nestled next to their child's he realized that all this time she'd been trying, and succeeding in proving her love and trust for him but tonight, the roles had reversed. It was now up to him to prove to her that he did trust her. She deserved to be shown, not just told, that she had his trust. He would do whatever it took to prove it to her however long it took. They would go slow and get it right. And when she was ready he would place that ring back on her finger.

The cool ocean breeze felt wonderful after a long hot muggy day but Jack knew that in a few more hours, it would get chilly. He pulled the baby's blanket down over her feet again where she'd kicked it away.

Irina was wearing only a light pair of sheer cotton pajamas made for this muggy part of the world so he looked around the room for something to cover her with. Spotting a light cotton blanket draped over the end of the bed frame, he quietly collected it and softly, placed it carefully over a sleeping Irina.

Jack ran his hand over Lena's soft hair and then softly over Irina's. He paused a moment looking at her bruised, swollen cheek, unsure before he very carefully placed a soft kiss to the hair just above her ear. He left the iPod on her nightstand before quietly closing the door to make his way downstairs.


	26. Chapter 26

_**AN: **_**Music for this chapter**_** (on repeat): Daughters **_**by John Mayer, _Don't _by Shania Twain, _Red Square _by Call of Duty Soundtrack**

* * *

TWENTY-SIX

o

Around 3:00 a.m. Lena awoke Irina from her sleep with a small cry of hunger.

"Shhh..." Irina immediately sprang awake and spoke softly in Russian to her baby, trying to calm her while she maneuvered her night gown top up and the baby over closer to her.

Lena's cries immediately subsided as soon as she latched onto her mother, her eyes immediately closing again to nurse in her sleep.

Irina smiled softly, adjusting her arm under her head so that she was propped up enough to look at Lena while still lying down. She pulled the blanket covering her up around the both of them and it was only then, did she realize she didn't remember covering herself with one. She glanced over to the nightstand and saw the iPod resting there.

"Jack." She whispered quietly into the darkness with a sigh, realizing that it was he who'd been in her room and covered them. Her thoughts immediately went back to the night's events. Running her free hand over the empty, cool space beside her where he should have been, brought tears to her eyes. She wanted nothing more then to be snuggled against his chest, safe in his warm embrace as he spooned her from behind. She'd quickly become reacquainted with their former sleeping position these past few days she was actually able to find sleep without threat of nightmares.

Sleep eluded Irina for the rest of the night and she passed the time on her balcony watching the sky change colors with the rising sun. Just before 5:00 a.m. she put on another white bikini with a wrap and made her way quietly downstairs with the baby who'd just fallen asleep again after her morning feeding.

Irina was surprised to find Jack asleep or rather, passed out and half hanging off the couch in the downstairs living room. She was in the middle of contemplating whether or not to leave the sleeping Lena in the living room with Jack when Weiss appeared at the bottom of the steps. His hair was wild from sleep and was yawning but he managed to smile and wave 'good morning' to Irina when he spotted her.

"Good Morning, Eric." She said quietly, smiling as she made her way around the kitchen, the baby asleep against her chest.

"Morning." He smiled in return as he took a seat on the stool in the kitchen. Seeing her in that bikini again snapped him out of any lingering sleepiness. She was Sydney's mom, she was old enough to be his mother, but he couldn't help it. Irina was gorgeous even with a sick, nasty bruise just across her face and he doubted anyone wouldn't agree with that assessment. "Let me take her." He whispered quietly, motioning with his fingers for Irina to hand the baby to him seeing she had her hands full trying to take her blood sugar and prepare insulin.

Happily she passed the baby off to one of her godfathers and smiled as she watched him snuggle Lena into his own chest, dropping a kiss to the top of her head.

"Were you going somewhere?" He asked quietly, pouring himself a glass of fresh squeezed orange juice.

"I was going to go for a swim this morning," She paused long enough to press the plunger of the syringe into her upper thigh, "But Sydney's not awake yet. I was going to leave her here… asleep with Jack but am having second thoughts on that as he drank so much vodka last night, I doubt he would wake up if Lena begins to cry." She eyed him from across the kitchen, noting that his head and arm now hung off the side of the couch, following suit of his left leg, which already hung there.

"You go." Weiss motioned with his head towards the beach. "I can watch her. Honestly." He smiled when Irina gave him a surprised yet skeptical look. "You'll be back before she's hungry again…right?" He looked at her chest briefly and diverted his eyes quickly when he realized where he was looking causing Irina to chuckle quietly to herself.

"Yes." She whispered back, trying to contain her giggling at how he was blushing. "She should be asleep for awhile yet, and if she wakes, she's generally content now for about ten minutes before she's hungry. If she starts to cry, turn on the ceiling fan. She likes to watch the blades."

"I thought babies this small couldn't see yet?" He looked down quizzically that the tiny bundle in his arms.

"She can see in black and white with the light, and the outlines of people and shapes, like shadows. No detail yet." She smiled and walked over to kiss Lena's head and tiny hand. "Thank you." Irina surprised him by dropping a quick kiss to his cheek. He smiled brightly, feeling himself blush as he watched her walk over to Jack and move his head, arm and leg back onto the couch. Looking around the room she found a small blanket and covered him with it. Weiss didn't miss the small smile and then kiss to Jack's forehead.

"I'll be back in a little while." Irina smiled at him as she walked passed and out the door.

He stood by the glass door, watching Irina's form dive into the beautiful sea and disappear beneath the surf. She emerged a few yards down the beach, where she began doing the breaststroke.

Weiss set about making a pot of coffee and when it was finished, he stepped outside onto the patio and stretched out in the hammock. The view was spectacular and he could see why Irina would have bought such a property. The ocean was a brilliant spectacle of emerald greens and blues and in the distance he could see Irina's white bikini pop up out of the water every few meters as she swam.

Holding Lena like this, it was easy to see why Irina, Sydney and even Jack had a hard time putting her down. She was like ta tiny ball of love and energy that as she slept against your chest, sent that love and energy straight into your heart. It was that love and energy connection from heart to heart that brought Irina back to the land of the living after the Execution. He'd never really been fond of babies, but after witnessing what it took to bring her into the world safely and keep her mother alive, he'd felt special connection to this baby.

Weiss ran his big hand softly over her back as she curled her naked legs under her, into the fetal position she wasn't ready to give up on yet. Her tiny feet he realized, weren't even as long as his little finger. He was in the middle of his inspection of her when Sydney slid the door open with a smile.

"Good morning." She smiled brightly, surprised to see Weiss alone with the baby. "Is this your first time babysitting?"

"It is indeed." He smiled in return as Vaughn wrapped his arms around Sydney from behind. "You know, those public displays of affection. What will people say if you're seen like that? The Nanny and the bodyguard?" He teased causing them to laugh.

"Where's my mom?" Sydney leaned over to kiss the bottom of Lena's foot.

"She's out there." Weiss nodded in the direction where Irina was still swimming up and down the coast. "And your dad, well I doubt I need to tell you."

"Yeah I saw him," Sydney replied dryly, still unhappy with her father. "I can't believe he managed to keep himself on the couch."

"He didn't actually." Weiss made a move to stand but found it difficult to get out of the hammock while holding the baby and not waking her. "He was almost completely on the floor before your mom put him back on and covered him up."

"Really?" Sydney raised her eyebrow in surprise and then realized it wasn't so shocking. Her mother loved her father after all, that wasn't the problem. She held out her hands to take the baby from Weiss so that he could get up.

"As long as I get her back when I get out of this damn thing." Weiss mock glared at her before surrendering the baby.

"I don't know about that. I haven't gotten to snuggle with her yet this morning." Sydney smiled brightly as she took the baby from him, loving the fact that he was enjoying holding her sister now; something he'd seem terrified of doing since her birth.

"You look awfully happy this morning, Mr. Vaughn; do I need to speculate as to why?" Weiss tried to say under his breath as they entered the house but Sydney heard and just stopped to stare at him with open mouth shock. "Oh come on, Syd, you can't play all innocent virgin girl with me!" Weiss laughed at the look on her face, "I was there at Thanksgiving, remember? I know about the 'glass shattering' that goes on between you two! I'm just giving you two 'props' for having the balls to do it under mommy's roof!"

Sydney was blushing now as was Vaughn but he smiled and pulled Sydney's temple to his lips before dropping a kiss to Lena's head.

Sydney looked so natural with a baby in her arms now, it was easy to see she'd be just as good of a mother as her mother was. Something none of them would have ever thought not so long ago.

Jack awoke to the sound of laughter sometime later coming from the kitchen. He rubbed his hand over his face, the bright light of day sending a sharp pain into his head. 'Hangovers were never enjoyable, especially from vodka.' He groaned as he moved to sit. Those in the kitchen hadn't noticed he was awake yet and he took a moment to watch them play with Lena who was now fully awake in Sydney's arms.

They were all laughing at her facial expressions, the scrunched eyebrows she'd make when she was analyzing someone and from the looks of it, Weiss had been the one evoking the looks out of her with whatever he was saying to her.

Jack suddenly felt hot and noticed the blanket covering his lower extremities. He was drunk last night but he remembered coming down from Irina's bedroom and flopping onto the couch; he'd never covered himself with a blanket. Sydney. He smiled to himself at how his daughter took care of him, even when she was angry with him.

"Morning." He stumbled into the kitchen, his quiet greeting ending the laughter as an uneasy silence fell upon the room.

The sudden stillness was disconcerting to Lena who started fussing, remembering she was hungry. Sydney shifted her to her shoulder where she started patting her back trying to calm her but the cries were getting louder.

"Thank you for covering me with the blanket, Sydney." Jack offered a small smile as both a thanks and silent apology for the way he acted towards her last night.

"I didn't." She responded matter-of-factly catching Jack's surprise as he looked to Vaughn and Weiss before following Sydney's gaze to Irina who'd just stepped into the kitchen.

Jack looked sheepishly at Irina who was deliciously wet and beautiful, twisting her sarong around her hair trying to towel out the excess water. She gave him a small smile before rapidly turning her attention to the crying baby Sydney held in her arms.

"Good morning, Sweetheart," Irina kissed Sydney's cheek as she took Lena from her, "Michael." She smiled as she passed him on the way towards the cabinet in the hall in search of a towel.

Lena was screaming impatiently now, flustered and snorting that her feverish attempts to find the source of that breakfast was being met with the cold, wet and salty bikini top.

"Alright, my little ravenous shark." Irina smiled softly, speaking to the baby in Russian. Giving up on modesty, and with her back to them, Irina pulled the tie behind her neck and the strings holding her suit top up fell.

Jack felt a surge to his groin watching her practically naked form retreating. She had an incredibly sexy back that with her new tan, seemed to make all the muscles there even more pronounced and sexy.

Irina managed to pull a stealthy maneuver to keep the other side up while Lena immediately began feeding on the other. She found a fluffy white towel and managed to wipe off the leftover water on her body before wrapping it haphazardly around her.

"Did you guys eat something for breakfast?" She asked innocently as she looked at all the faces in the room.

They seemed to be set in stone, waiting for her move to see how they should proceed with the potential landmine that was now, Jack Bristow.

"No." Sydney answered for the three of them. "We thought we'd wait for you."

"That was nice of you, thank you. I think I'll make you some omelets of the native kind. " Irina smiled, "Jack, how about you?" She took the first step. "Would you like something to eat or not yet?" She gave him a teasing smile knowing that with a vodka hangover, the last thing you wanted to do was eat eggs or smell them for that matter. This was Irina's own small punishment for him and he saw it for what it was, a first step.

"Not yet, but thank you for the offer. I'll stick with the coffee for now." He leaned heavily against the counter as she brushed past him towards the fridge. Her wet hair and the skin of her arm brushing against his bare chest sending another shiver down south. She hadn't missed the look of desire in his eyes when she'd first stepped into the house. This was another hit preparing to sink his ship that was this new game of silent Battleship she was playing. Of course, she would eventually win the game because he was not allowed to play. He'd lost that right last night.

Irina started gathering things from the fridge and Jack stepped out of the way as Sydney moved to stand in between them, essentially pushing her father into the corner and away from her mother.

"I'll help you, Mom. Tell me what you need me to do." Sydney offered.

When breakfast was ready, Irina tested herself again and let out a frustrated sigh. "This is ridiculous." She said under breath, preparing another syringe of insulin.

"Mom, what's wrong?" Sydney turned around from where she was sitting on a breakfast stool eating.

"My numbers are all over the place this morning. I suppose it's because I didn't eat until so late last night." Irina flicked the syringe the best she could while holding onto Lena who was still eating. "This is the second time in the last five hours I've had to take insulin." She sighed frustrated that her new condition was such a pain to deal with.

"Let me help you." Sydney motioned for the syringe and Irina handed it over. "Where should I?"

Irina turned around so that her back was to Sydney, "Here." Irina reached her one free arm around her back and pulled down her bikini bottoms just enough to reveal the beginning soft curve of one butt cheek.

"Anywhere in that region as long as it's got some cushion. If I have to jam that syringe in my abs again…I hate needles." She shifted her weight on her heels; suddenly aware Sydney hadn't injected her yet. Irina threw her hair over her shoulder trying to look at her daughter. "Sydney, what is it?"

"Mom, what is this? Is this…?" Sydney couldn't tear her eyes from the faded blue Cyrillic symbols and numbers etched into the skin just above Irina's gluteus.

Irina's face was suddenly ashen in color as the others' at the table interests peaked and caught a glimpse of what Sydney was looking at.

"Is that a tattoo?" Weiss squinted from the far side of the table.

Irina closed her eyes for a moment and sighed, she'd completely forgotten about it when directing Sydney to a location for injection. She'd always been thankful that it was there, on her backside and somewhere she wasn't forced to look at it everyday and with time, it'd become a part of her, who she was and what she came from.

"Yes." She answered quietly turning her face away from the table. "In the Soviet Gulag system, every prisoner was tattooed with an identification number to identify the body in the event of…" She let the thought die on her lips, "That was mine."

Jack found it hard to swallow. How had he never seen it before? All the times since her return that he'd seen her naked. But then again, it was always in the cover of darkness when he'd seen her backside. Or in the light of day, hidden perfectly by her underwear line.

They'd all known this had been the practice of the Soviets, as it was with the Germans during the Holocaust when they put people into concentration camps. They'd never seen it before, this close, this personal.

Sydney ran her finger gently over the long list of blue letters and numbers with tears in her eyes.

Irina's hand found Sydney's and stopped the motion.

"It's ok, Sweetheart." Irina squeezed them gently offering a small smile over her shoulder. "It's just a tattoo."

"But it's not just a tattoo." Sydney looked up at her with glistening eyes thinking of the horror Irina went through in Kashmir and now to find out she had a permanent physical reminder was too much. Her mind instantly and easily jumped to the image of Irina just after they'd taken her out of solitary. Kendall's comment about how Irina had looked like a 'Holocaust survivor' because she was so terrible thin, bones jutting out of her body. Sydney's mind flashed to the films of WWII and piles of dead Jews who'd been starved and beaten to death in the concentration camps, their identification numbers tattooed into the forearms of their bodies. Flashing back to the present looking directly at the one in her mother's flesh and how easily Irina could have been one of those corpses on a pile.

Irina turned to face Sydney fully, "Sydney, look at me." She used her free hand to force Sydney's face to look her in the eye. "I'm okay. I'm not there anymore. That tattoo cannot hurt me."

"Why didn't you have it removed?" Sydney snapped out of her daze to ask the obvious.

"Because even with a laser removal, a physical scar is left behind; marking the spot where the tattoo had once been, reminding me of what used to be there. So why not leave the original?" She used her thumb to gently wipe away the fallen tears on Sydney's cheek. "It's become a part of me now, part of who I am and how I became the person I am today. When I look at that tattoo, like with any scar on my body, I'm reminded of what I'm capable of overcoming and also of the mistakes I never want to make again. Now enough of this depressing talk," Irina leaned forward and kissed Sydney's cheek quickly before turning her back once again to her daughter. "I need that insulin before I pass out, please?"

Sydney pulled down the edge of the swimsuit once again revealing the tattoo and carefully slid the needle in.

"Thank you." Irina turned and smiled, "Now let's eat."

An awkward silence had befallen the group so Weiss took the initiative and changed to a subject that brought smiles to everyone: Lena.

Jack for the most part, remained silent on the opposite side of the table only smiling as they discussed his youngest. It was abundantly clear that Sydney was still upset about last night and he wasn't sure where he stood with Irina.

"Jack and I thought we'd combine two occasions and have Lena baptized on Christmas Eve if that's ok for the both of you?" Irina gathered up her plate when they were finished and set it on the counter. "And Marshall of course. You're still planning on coming to St. Petersburg for Christmas aren't you?"

"Yeah of course, I wouldn't miss it for anything." Weiss smiled and help gather the rest of the plates. "This is the year my parents visit my sister and her husband in Australia so I'd be at home, alone with my pathetic Charlie Brown Christmas tree. So I will gladly accept that offer."

Irina smiled brightly and turned to Vaughn, "And you?"

"I've already made plans to go Paris on Friday. To spend some time with my mom," He stood quietly adding, "I'll grab a morning flight on the following Thursday from there and should arrive sometime late on the 23rd, if that's ok?"

"Yes, of course that's ok." Irina squeezed his upper arm with a small smile. "Please, extend the invitation to your mother that I would he honored if she would join us as well. I've never had the pleasure of meeting her." She added quietly, "From what your father told me, she is an incredible woman."

"She is." Vaughn responded resolutely.

"I second that." Weiss nodded in agreement remembering the first time he'd met her when he and Vaughn were in college. He was stunned to come back to their dorm room and find the beautiful blonde French woman sitting on his bed.

At the time, he had no idea who she was only that she was the most incredibly beautiful 'mother' he'd seen in his life time up to that point.

To this day, her beauty could only be rivaled by one other mother, Irina Derevko.

"She's a lot like you, I think, without the whole 'dangerous I could kill you with my bare hands' thing." His tone faded at both Irina and Vaughn's looks.

"Really," Irina traced her bottom lip with her finger in thought, "Interesting."

"I haven't had the chance to meet her either." Sydney realized suddenly that she'd known Vaughn for sometime now, had a deep relationship with him and had yet to meet his mother. And there had been a reason for that; her mother had supposedly killed his father. Not exactly the best of terms in which to bring a girl home and introduce to your mother, the daughter of the woman who'd killed your husband.

"About that," Vaughn resumed his seat next to Sydney. "I'd really like it if you would come with me to Paris. To meet my mother. She's been asking when she was going to get to meet you. I think now is a good time."

"Vaughn are you sure?" Sydney asked almost breathless. "What about-"

"Yes. I'm sure." He took hold of her hand and squeezed her fingers. "I think she's ok with it now, with what happened with my dad. She's accepted it. Come to some sort of peace, I think. She took it better then I did." He looked down at his hands, "She was shocked of course. But once she got over the hurt and anger, she realized that my father married her because he loved her, no ulterior motives." He glanced up briefly at Irina. "Knowing that he tried to get back to us I think has helped to reassure her that he really did love us."

"He did." Irina spoke quietly remembering Mikhail's face, smiling with joy when he told her of his family.

"Ok." Sydney gave him a small smile, "I'll go with you." She paused and looked from her mother to her father, "But, I'll have to meet you there."

"Why?" Vaughn looked at her curiously as did Jack and Weiss.

"I'm going to Moscow with Mom for a couple of days." She slumped down in her chair like a small child in trouble when she saw her father's eyes flash to Irina.

"Moscow? You're going back to Russia? Now?" Jack's eyes bore deep into Irina's dark eyes, afraid that she was leaving him as a result of last night.

"Katya called me last night. I need to take care of a few things for business." Irina ran thumb over the baby's ear nervously averting her eyes from Jack to Sydney and then smiled. "I know that you have to take care of some business things of your own in LA, so I asked Sydney to join me for a couple of days so that we can spend some time together."

"So you're not coming home to Los Angeles with us?" Jack asked quietly, internally wondering if she thought of it as their home anymore.

"Not right now, no." She added softly, "I haven't been home to Russia in months now, there are a lot of things…people that need my attention. I was going to talk about it with you later. I wasn't just going to take the baby and leave if that's what you're worried about."

"No." Jack jumped in, not wanting to head down the path of mistrust again. "I didn't think you would." He walked to the coffee pot and poured another cup, "So when are you leaving?" He tried his best not to show how upset he was. Irina was pulling away and he couldn't do anything about it. She needed some space and as much as he hated the thought of being without her for even a day, he wouldn't fight her on it. The first step in showing he trusted her.

"As soon as I hear from Dubey." Irina looked at the clock, "I'm supposed to meet him in an hour. If you want to come along, I won't object." Her tone was defeated as she thought about last night.

"That won't be necessary." He replied immediately surprising Irina and the others, "I'll stay here with Lena. I'd like to spend some time with her before you leave for Russia." He placed his hand over the baby's back with a sad smile as Irina held the sleeping child.

"Alright." Irina passed the baby off to Jack gently, kissing the baby's ear once she was securely in her father's arms. "We should get going." Irina turned and tied the sarong around her hips again. "I think we'll take the boat so you don't have to wear the suits today." She gave Weiss and Vaughn a smile. "Sydney, aren't you coming?" She asked when Sydney made no attempt to move from her stool.

"No, I think I'm going to stay here with Dad and Lena." The look she gave Irina meant she intended to speak with Jack about something, which Jack caught as well.

"Ok, we'll see you guys in a little while." Irina smiled and stepped through the glass doors followed by Weiss and Vaughn.

"So we're taking the boat." Weiss looked around the beach seeing no dock anywhere and wondering where exactly they were headed.

"Yes, and right on time." Irina smiled as a large high-powered speedboat came flying towards them. Within seconds of sight, the boat was slowing down as it arrived at the shore.

Irina waded into the water and took the outstretched hand of the small native man who'd been driving as he helped her into the boat. She spoke rapidly with him in his native language as Weiss and Vaughn climbed aboard.

The little man with an enormous smile greeted the two men before he took the co-pilots seat and Irina took over control of the driving.

"Nice name for the boat." Weiss smirked as he took a seat having noticed the name painted on the back of the boat when they climbed aboard, Man-Eater.

"It's an appropriate name wouldn't you agree?" Irina gave him a Cheshire cat grin from behind her sunglasses, checking the guns the little man handed her from a black waterproof case. Meeting her approval, she tucked one into the back of her bikini and sarong and within seconds they were heading up the coastline at full-throttle.

_***Daughters***_

Jack thought briefly about taking Lena outside to sit on the patio but decided against it as the temperature outside now was sweltering again. Staying indoors with air-condition was a much better idea.

"Sydney," Jack sat on the couch opposite of the one Sydney had sank into just moments previous, "I want to apologize to you for my behavior towards you last night." He looked up at her with sorrowful eyes. "I shouldn't have grabbed your arm like that and I'm sorry."

"For just your behavior toward me and not your behavior in general? Not your behavior towards mom?" She gave him a fierce look that he'd seen too many times in the last few years. "Have you apologized to her?"

"I'll admit that my behavior towards your mother was less then outstanding last night, but that's separate from you and I, Sydney." Jack turned the baby in his arms as she was waking up. "That's between your mother and me."

"No, it isn't, Dad." Sydney tucked her legs underneath her, shaking her head with unshed tears. "The way you treat mom, the things you say to her and the way she reacts to you…that directly affects Lena and I. Can't you see that? If I had been in mom's place last night, and it had been Vaughn that was saying those things to me, treating me, the way you treated her…If I just stood there and took it like mom did, let him berate me and take my love for him and throw it back in my face… How would that make you feel, Dad? Because after all, isn't that what you're teaching us, your daughters, that it's ok for a man to treat a woman that way because that's the way you treat our mother?"

"Sydney, I-" Jack began an attempt to defend himself but was cut off.

"No, Dad, let me finish." Sydney said forcefully and then took a calming breath. "Whether you realize it or not, as our father, you are the one whom we, as your daughters, have our first male relationship. You are the one who establishes how we will view men and relationships for the rest of our lives. You are the first and most important male influence that we will ever have." She paused knitting her fingers together as she looked at her hands. "Watching how you treat our mother, relate to her, is how we end up believing the way we should be treated by men. You establish the first relationship we have of trust and love and respect with a man. Above all else, we should know that you are always the one male in our lives we can count on for that love, and trust. Trust not to hurt us, or the ones we love. We learn how to have relationships, how to treat and be treated in them, from you, Dad. Last night," She paused thinking about what she'd seen and heard. "The way you treated mom…there was no respect, or trust or love. It scared me. Because if the most important man in our life lets us down on those principles, why would we expect anything else from every other man?"

Jack didn't know what to say looking from Sydney's tear stained cheeks down the wide-eyed baby in his lap.

"I know that your relationship with mom isn't exactly easy after everything that's happened," She sighed and sank back into the suede cushions. "When I was little, I remember the way you treated mom. It was so beautiful, so full of love and respect even when you were angry with each other, you always found a way to work it out without destroying each other's feelings in the process." She looked up to meet Jack's eyes, whom to her surprised held unshed tears as well. "I wanted to marry someone just like you, someone to treat me as special as you treated my mommy; it's why every little girl wants to marry their daddy. I'm telling you this because I don't think you really understand the correlation of the way you communicate with mom and how it affects us. I'm old enough now to understand that this situation is complicated with the two of you. But I also want Lena to be able to have that relationship with you, both of you, that I had when I was little, the relationship I was looking for in my own life ever since. As your child, I am apart of mom, and I am a part of you. When mom hurts you, she hurts me. And when you hurt mom, you hurt me, too. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Jack answered softly, finally understanding. "I guess I've never looked at it that way before. Looked at it from your point of view as my daughter and as our child and I'm sorry. I should have." He looked back down to Lena who was grasping his little finger with her tiny hand staring intently at him as he spoke. "I guess when you become a parent, you think about all the things you have to teach your child like manners, how to take care of themselves, how to ride bikes and do their homework. And it seems that many times, we forget that the most important things we teach our children are learned when we aren't even aware as you've just pointed out." He got up from his position on the couch and made his way over to sit next to Sydney, wrapping one arm around her shoulder as he cradled Lena in the other. "Sydney, its easy to forget as a father sometimes, just how important his relationship is to his daughter. What I mean is," He paused a moment to try and put into words what he felt, "It's easy for fathers to forget how important their relationship with their daughter is, because of how important and close the relationship of a mother and daughter is. We tend to believe, and for the most part it is true, that the most important things our daughters learn about life, come from their mothers and the relationships they have with them." He pulled Sydney into his side and dropped a kiss to her hair, "I apologize to you, and to your sister for the way I treated your mother last night. And you're right, I would be irate if anyone ever spoke to you, treated you or Lena like I did your mother. I'm sorry. And it's been noted in the past that where your mother is concerned, I have a hard time being rational. I let my own jealousy; my insecurities get in the way of what is most important. She deserves better and I'm ashamed of the way I treated her."

"So start thinking of ways to make it up to her!" Sydney said in all seriousness that caused Jack to laugh, which got a small smile out of Sydney. "I'm serious, Dad. You're scared you're going to lose her again and you're letting your fear take over and by doing that, you're pushing her away."

"You've been spending too much time in Barnett's office." Jack playfully nudged her with a small smile thinking about the CIA psychologist they'd both been ordered to see when Irina reappeared in their lives. "You're far too perceptive."

"Well, I am a trained investigator." Sydney wiped her tears with a smile.

"I know, and you're right. It took some serious action on your mother's part to make me see that unfortunately." Jack frowned at the thought, "It's my turn to prove to her how committed I am to making this work now, forever and always. Because she's it, Sydney. She knows that and I know that. There is no one else for either of us. And if taking it slow and giving her space is what she needs right now, I'll respect her wishes. I'll spend everyday for the rest of my life proving myself worthy of her love."

Sydney just stared at him. She couldn't believe how open he was being with her about his feelings.

"What is this look you're giving me? What Sydney?" Jack reached Lena's pacifier on the coffee table as she began to get fussy.

"Are you sure you're still not drunk?" Sydney looked deeply into his eyes causing Jack to laugh out loud.

"No, Sydney, I'm not still drunk." He shifted Lena in his arms again so that he could look at her face to face as she sucked with certain ferociousness on the small rubber substitute. "I'm just being honest with my daughter who reminds me everyday just how grown up and mature she is. Dr. Barnett has taught me a thing or two these last couple of years about expressing my feelings and reminds me, as you do, that you're not a child anymore and I shouldn't treat you as such." He laughed gently swaying his knees back and forth to rock Lena from side to side.

"I appreciate that." Sydney wrapped her arm around Jack's shoulders and kissed his cheek with a smile.

"Since we're having a father daughter heart-to-heart about relationships, earlier, when you were talking about looking for a relationship like your mother's and mine…you used past-tense." He turned slowly to look her in the eye, "Does that mean you found what you were looking for? With Vaughn?"

The corners of Jack's lips turned up when he saw the flicker of light in Sydney's eyes at the mentioning of Vaughn's name. She was caught off guard by her father's forward questioning.

"I had something like it with Danny." Tears started pooling in her eyes thinking about her fiancé who had died so tragically at Soane's hand. "And I never thought I would feel this way again when I lost him…but I do, and yet it's different with Vaughn."

"Sydney, no two relationships are ever the same but," Jack took a deep breath not believing himself that they were having this conversation. "I know that you're mother is the one for me because whenever we're apart, I can't stop thinking about the next time I get see her again. Every minute we're apart feels like I'm holding my breath and the next week without her is going to be torture. Since the first day we met, she's been the first person I think about when I wake up and the last before I sleep…even during her twenty-year absence. She knows me better then I know myself and every time I see her smile," He smiled at Sydney thinking about it, "I fall that much more in love with her."

Sydney was smiling from ear to ear hearing her father talk about her mother like this.

"She's my equal in every way and what we lack in ourselves, we find in each other. We complete one another. So if you have something like that with Vaughn," He looked into her eyes, "Then you've found what you were looking for."

"Yes." She smiled with happy tears in her eyes. "Vaughn is my equal."

"Then I'm very happy for you." He returned the smile.

"Thank you." Sydney breathed a sigh of relief. She never in a million years would have imagined a conversation like this going so well. "Dad, you know how I suggested you start thinking of ways to make it up to mom?"

"Yes." Jack eyed her suspiciously, feeling a bit lighter himself having had this conversation.

"Well, I think if you told her, what you just told me about how you feel about her. It would go along way in helping your cause." She smiled as she got off the couch to make Lena a bottle. "Women like to hear what makes them special from time to time. And have you ever 'told' her any of that? How you know that she's the one for you?"

Jack sat a moment and thought, 'No, he hadn't ever actually told her any of that.' His furrowed eyebrows at his own disappointment for never having done such, was all the answer Sydney needed.

* * *

_***Don't***_

"So I'll see you Saturday, right?" Vaughn asked putting the remainder of their bags into the back of the awaiting limo. "And you'll call me when you land?"

"Yes, to meeting you in Paris on Saturday and yes, I'll call you as soon as we land." Sydney smiled as she watched him pick up his own bag and throw the strap over his shoulder.

They were taking separate limos to the airports. Vaughn, Weiss and Jack were all catching flights back to LA on a commercial airline and Sydney, Irina and Lena were taking Irina's jet to Moscow.

"Have a good time with your mom, ok?" He ran his hand down her cheek then brushed her hair behind her ear. He knew how badly Sydney needed this time to make more memories with Irina after all the time they'd lost.

"I will, you too." She leaned up and kissed him soundly thinking about the discussion she'd had with her father about him.

Jack watched from the doorway holding Lena in her car seat while Irina finished her one last inspection of the house before she closed it up.

"You've got everything?" He asked quietly watching her lock the doors, feeling awkward about how he was going to say goodbye.

"Yes. All clear." She picked up the diaper bag and slung it over her shoulder.

"Call me when you land, okay?" Jack asked walking slowly with Irina down the steps and path to the waiting cars where the others were waiting. "The weather channel said Moscow was getting hit hard with snow and I just want to make sure that you landed okay."

Irina smiled at his concern, "I will…and I'll let you know the moment I hear any news from Dubey." She glanced briefly at Jack and then away.

When she'd met with Dubey earlier in the day he could only tell her that Zamir had recently been in Kuala-Lumpur and then onto Hong Kong but after that he seemed to vanish. No one had seen him in the last two weeks. Dubey promised to keep looking and let her know the moment he found the trail again.

When they reached the door of the car Jack handed the car seat to Irina.

"So I guess this is 'Goodbye." He gave her a small smile and bent over softly kissing his daughter's head.

"Not goodbye, but goodnight." Irina offered him a small smile, reaching out to squeeze his hand; "We'll see you in a little less then a week, right?"

"Right." Jack returned the smile but wouldn't release Irina's hand. They stare at each other for a moment, neither wanting to break the contact.

"You need to get going. You don't want to miss your flight." Irina finally pulled her hand away and blinked back the tears she would not allow to fall, not allow him to see. "Have a safe flight, Jack." She turned and placed her hand on the door handle.

Jack hesitated for a moment but knew he couldn't let her leave like this. Not when they hadn't had a chance to talk; he grabbed her arm softly and just as quickly as she turned her face his mouth landed softly against hers. His free hand cupped the side of her face to momentarily hold it there, savoring the contact before quickly releasing her.

Irina stood momentarily frozen as she watched him walk backwards to the other car.

"I'll see you in a week." He stated with a small nod and disappeared into the dark car.

* * *

_***Red Square***_

Moscow- Red Square

"Nice view." Sydney looked out the window at the dramatic landscape before flopping onto the big bed in Irina's penthouse apartment.

The beautiful modern space overlooked Red Square and the Kremlin.

"Too bad it's freezing outside! Talk about culture shock, going from Indonesia and 100+ degrees to Russia and single digits!"

"At least the snow has stopped…and you're speaking in Russian?" Irina returned in Russian looking at Sydney curiously. She placed Lena on the bed next to Sydney and began rummaging around in her closet.

"Well, I figured when in Russia speak Russian." Sydney shrugged continuing on in Russian. "Isn't that what Katya told Sophia about speaking in Italian? Besides, it isn't fair to make you speak in English all the time." She rolled over to play with Lena and watch Irina.

"I went over a decade without speaking any Russian. English comes just as naturally to me now though I appreciate the consideration." She threw a smile back at Sydney while she began pulling various sweaters out of the doors finding nothing she wanted to wear.

"But English isn't the your first choice of language is it? You speak to Lena in Russian without even thinking about it." Sydney wrapped the blanket around her sister's foot poking out making sure she was staying warm.

"Yes that's true, on both accounts. But your father and I discussed how we'd handle Lena's language already. I'll speak with her in Russian and he in English until she's fluent in both. You, My Love," She brushed Sydney's chin with her fingers on the way by, "May speak to her in any language you'd like. The more languages she's exposed to early on, the easier it will be for her to learn them later."

"Well, you could always use the Project Christmas training on her." Sydney raised an eyebrow at her mother.

"Absolutely not!" Irina wheeled around from where she was standing at the closet. "I never wanted your father to use it on you! The last thing I want is another child in this line of business. You've caused me enough worry for three life times."

"Just checking." Sydney smiled in return and Irina shook her head with a smile knowing Sydney had just 'yanked her chain' as the Americans liked to say. "And for the record I like to hear you speak in Russian." She smiled shyly looking down at her sister. "Though your accent in English is fun too. Especially when you say 'idgiot,' or 'sabo-tage." Sydney looked up smiling brightly and then laughed as Irina shook her head smiling as well.

"Yes, I suppose my accent has crept back into my English after speaking predominantly in Russian for the last twenty years." Irina moved to a high chest of drawers and quickly began pulling out clothes then looked up and stopped with an enormous smile on her face. "One of my most favorite memories of you as a child was when you were about two, you couldn't pronounce certain letters together like, your own name for example, you would say, 'Synny' and it wasn't Spiderman, but 'piderman." Irina laughed picturing two-year old Sydney. "One day after church, where you'd just learned about being Christian, you pronounced to everyone on the way out, 'Synny a Kisstin!' You were so proud!" She smiled, "Digging in this closet reminds me of a time your father and I had to go to a formal ball at some country's embassy, I don't recall but it's not important. What was important at the time was the little bug you found in my shoe while you were sitting in there under all the hanging clothes while I was getting dressed. You came tearing out of there and clung onto my leg screaming, 'Bug Mama bug bug!' I knelt down next you on the floor to find this 'traumatic bug' and out flew a little bee!" Irina giggled, "You jumped right into my lap so quickly and started screaming again, 'Bug bug bug!' Again with your arms around my neck clinging for dear life!"

Sydney was laughing too, having never heard this story. Many were erased in Project Christmas.

"I calmed you down and explained that it was a 'bee' that flew out of my shoe. From that moment on, every bug we encountered was labeled a bee!" She laughed, and smiled so brightly at the memory. "That's also when I started calling you my little Sugar Bug. Because you'd been in there eating jellybeans." Irina looked at Sydney with a warming glow, remember her daughter so many years before.

"Hey, I think I remember that! You calling me, Sugar Bug." Sydney's eyes went bright hearing her mother say those words again, in her voice. "And I remember Cinderella, too. What was it that dad always called me?"

"Runtberry." Irina laughed remembering as well.

"Yes, that's it!" Sydney's eyes sparkled as she recalled moments she'd long thought forgotten. "But I still don't understand where in the world he came up with that one? Of all nicknames to give a little girl? Runtberry?"

"Sydney, when you were really little you loved everything to do with Strawberry Shortcake. You had the dolls, and baby stroller with all the characters from the television story printed on it like…Oh, what was his name?" Irina traced her lip with her finger thinking back, "Oh yes, The Purple Pie Man." She smiled, "You were so into that show and your dolls that you wouldn't eat anything for weeks but strawberries. Your father told you that you were going to turn into one if you kept eating so many. Then he'd have to start calling you, Runtberry as a little 'runt of a girl' who ate only berries and turned into one! So from then on, you were his 'Little Runtberry."

Irina smiled widely remembering Jack's face when he'd found Sydney sitting next to an open fridge, completely covered in sticky red strawberry juice as she'd eaten the whole container of strawberry jello. Jack was mad at the time but she thought it was too funny and had to take a picture while he hosed off a naked Sydney in the lawn. 'Wonder where that photograph went to?' Irina's mind wandered.

"So you just have closets full of beautiful clothes waiting for you all around the world?" Sydney watched as Irina pulled on a pair of black slacks and matching high turtleneck made of Angora bunny hair. "Sure saves time on packing." Sydney threw another teasing smile at Irina.

"Yes, the perfect setup for a woman who's always on the move." Irina smiled in the mirror at Sydney as she pulled her hair up. "Alright," Irina finished and pulled a beautiful black fur coat and hat out of the hall closet. "This shouldn't take more then an hour or two and then I'll be back to pick the two of you up for dinner, ok? I thought I'd take you to one of my favorite restaurants here in the Square." She slid her arms into the beautiful coat.

"Dinner in the Red Square." Sydney repeated out loud as though she were pondering something. The arch in her eyebrow gave her away.

"What is it?" Irina walked over to the bed and picked up a pair of gloves with a curious smile.

"Nothing." She tried to shrug it off and then laughed seeing Irina's look, "It's just this is the first time I've been here non-mission related."

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that." Irina gave her a mock glare with her own furrowed eyebrows and a smile. "Alright, I need to go and when I get back, I want to know what happened with Michael that has you glowing from ear to ear." Irina smiled at Sydney's look of surprise.

"Ok," Sydney smiled thinking about how happy she was in this moment. In Russia, with her mother, non-mission related and talking about the man she loved.

"Ok." Irina leaned over and kissed the baby and then Sydney's cheek. "Oh, and Sydney," She paused at the door. "Could you please call your father and let him know we landed safely? He was worried about the snow storm."

"Didn't he want you to call?" Sydney knew what she was doing, avoiding.

"Sydney," Irina sighed, her daughter was too much like her. Wasn't afraid to call people on what they were really saying or doing. "Please, just call him for me? I would but I'll be late for the meeting."

"Sure Mom, whatever you say." Sydney smiled seeing her mother flustered, something she rarely if ever witnessed. Only her father had the power to unnerve Irina Derevko.

"I love you." Irina smiled, "Thank you."

"I love you, too and you're welcome." Sydney sighed as she watched the door close. "I suppose we should prepare ourselves for the disappointment we're bound to hear in dad's voice when he realizes mom's not calling." Sydney smiled down at the baby who was now fixated on the brilliant lights of the Christmas tree in the corner. 'Who does all the decorating around her anyway?' She thought to herself as she dialed the familiar number.

"Hello?" Jack answered quickly recognizing that the call was being made from Russia on his caller ID. He'd gone straight to work after landing in LA, not wanting to go home and face and empty house and the paparazzi he learned were still camping out around the block.

"Dad…Hi, its me…Sydney." She could hear him literally deflate on the other end of the line.

"Sydney, of course. How are you? Is everything ok? Your mother said she would call me when you landed." He rolled back in his office chair, looking at the framed photo of Sydney, Irina and a newborn Lena on his desk.

"Yeah, everything's great. We're all fine. We got in late and mom had just enough time to change before she had to rush off to her meeting with Putin." Sydney stood and looked outside, now dark with the cover of night that came so early in this part of the world in winter. The beauty of St. Basil's lit up at night in the snow, was breathtaking. "I'm looking down at the Kremlin right now." She smiled.

Jack knew Irina was avoiding talking to him, and to be honest he wasn't quite sure what he would say to her either when she called. He thought about what he would say to her the next time he talked with her the entire flight back to LA.

"You didn't go with her?" He asked absentmindedly, his thoughts somewhere else.

"Um no, Dad. I don't think it would be a very good idea for me, as an officer of the CIA, to enter the Kremlin." She couldn't believe he'd ask that, he really must be flustered. "No matter who mom is, that'd be a terrible idea."

"Yes, of course. I don't know why I asked that." Jack sat forward and rested his elbows on the desk, rubbing his temple.

"Maybe because you're too distracted thinking about mom?" Sydney smiled on the other end of the phone.

"Sydney." Jack sighed, his daughter was relentless, deciding it was best to drop it and change the subject, "So what are you three up to this evening? It's dark there already isn't it?" He glanced at this watch.

"Yes, it is. The five hours of daylight have come and gone." Sydney watched the people below moving about the Square, coming in and out of shops. "We're going to eat at some restaurant that's one of mom's favorites, I guess when she's done with whatever she's doing at the Kremlin. That's still hard for me to believe even standing here in her apartment looking down at it."

"Yes, I'm sure it's unbelievable to witness first hand. Just thinking about it," Jack paused in thought, "I can't seem to grasp the full concept of it yet. Apparently it's become knowledge this week that your mother was KGB and married me, a CIA officer while on assignment. Kendall informed me before we landed that the house was swarming with photographers and news cameras all wanting to get the story first. It's just ridiculous. We're going to have to do something."

"Are you ok, Dad? You sound tired. You're at work aren't you?" Sydney sighed as she picked up her sister and walked into the large living room. "Dad, go home and get some sleep."

"Sydney, don't worry about me. I'll be ok and have lots of work to do so I better get going." He lied but didn't want to tell her he didn't think he was going to be able to sleep at all in that big empty bed waiting for him at home. "Give your sister…and your mother… a kiss from me please?"

"Ok, I will." She smiled.

"And Sydney, have a wonderful time with her." He smiled softly looking back at the photograph of his three girls. "I love you."

"I love you too." She added softly before hanging up. "Oh, Lena, Dad's got the blues. Appropriate punishment for his behavior I think, but unfortunately it punishes mom as well." She furrowed her eyebrows at the thought. "We'll have to make sure and smother her with lovin' and hugs for the next few days, alright partner." She waved the finger Lena clutched tightly back and forth. "Speaking of loving, I need to call Vaughn."


	27. Chapter 27

**_AN: _Music for this chapter (on repeat): _Moscow Nights_ by Vladimir Troshin, __****Rhapsody On A Theme Of Paganini - Variation 18 from the **Somewhere in Time Soundtrack, _Brown Eyed Girl_ by Van Morrison, _Kung Foo Fighting by Carl Douglas_, _Why Can't We Be Friends? _by War_, Father and Daughter_ by Paul Simon, _Russian Dance _from_ The Nutcracker_ by P. Tchaikovsky  


* * *

TWENTY-SEVEN

o

"Sydney?" Irina called from the hallway, brushing the remaining snow from her coat.

"We're in here, Mom." Sydney called out from the bedroom having just finished changing Lena.

Irina smiled as she stepped into the room and saw how beautiful her girls looked.

"I wasn't sure what to wear so I hope this is going to be ok?" Sydney smoothed her hands of the red fuzzy sweater she was wearing.

"It's perfect and you look beautiful." Irina took her face in her hands and kissed her cheeks, before removing her coat. She scooped up the baby and snuggled her against her face.

Sydney surprised her with a quick kiss to the cheek. "That was from dad." She smiled catching the sparkle in her mother's eye. "He sounded positively deflated that it was me on the phone instead of you."

"Sydney, I doubt that very much. How could your father be disappointed to hear from you?" She shook her head and sat on the couch, deciding it was best to feed Lena now, before they got to the restaurant.

"Well he was. I heard the audible sigh." She shrugged, not bothered by it. "He hasn't even gone home yet or slept since Jakarta." Sydney didn't miss the flash of concern that swept across Irina's face.

"Why not?" Irina asked casually, shifting herself so that her arm supporting Lena was supported by an overstuffed pillow.

"He claims he has a lot of work to do." Sydney sat down in one of the big leather chairs across from Irina and began playing with the nesting doll on the coffee table. "That's code for he 'doesn't want to go home to an empty house." She added after a moment of silence deciding to leave out the part about the mass of photographers waiting there.

Irina swallowed hard and chose to ignore the remark about the empty house.

"So, do you want to tell me now about what happened with Michael or would you rather wait until we get to the restaurant?"

"Wait." Sydney smiled thinking how that topic would be a perfect segue-way into talking to her mother about her father.

"Ok." Irina smiled seeing the mischievous gleam in Sydney's eye. "Well, is there anything particular you'd like to do while we're here?"

"No, not really." Sydney shrugged, and tossed her long hair over her shoulder. "As long as I'm spending time with you anything is fine by me." She smiled.

"That sounds good to me, too." Irina smiled in return, "I'm sorry I had to leave you alone just after we arrived."

"It's okay. I understand you have to take care of things. What did you and Vladimir talk about? Or should I not ask that question?" Sydney finished removing all twelve dolls and lined them up revealing those present at the Nativity of Christ's birth. "I'm not used to asking you questions about your business dealings without having to interrogate you." She bit her lip nervously. "And I don't want you to feel like I'm interrogating you, because I'm not. Its just a little strange for me still, to be sitting this close to the Kremlin talking to you, about all this, like this." She fidgeted nervously with the smallest doll, the baby Jesus remembering how she'd spoken to Irina just after Agent Crane informed her that Irina hadn't said a thing during a two hour long interrogation/debriefing… other then to ask about Sydney. Sydney hadn't exactly been kind to Irina when she marched up to that cell and put 'Irina' in her place, or so she thought at the time. "I'm sorry. I'll just be quiet now."

Irina laughed placing a hand on Sydney's knee, "Sydney, I don't want you to be quiet. I want to hear everything you have to say and I don't feel like you're interrogating me."

"We covered many topics this evening. Let's see," Irina sat back against the cushions and bit her own lip recalling what they'd talked about.

Rattling them off like they were items on a grocery list Sydney thought.

"We started with the celebrations for the Winter Festivals, budgeting, the new military training facilities, Chechnya, the upcoming United Nations meeting, the construction and opening of the new maternity hospitals and clinics, the election and…how we're going to handle the 'new' information of my public outing." She added softly with a small smile and a shrug as she put her hair behind her ear. "It's become public knowledge over the week that I was in the KGB and on assignment when I married your father in America; that he was…is CIA and that you, our grown daughter are as well. That's only seemed to add more fuel to the fire of people's interest. And now everyone knows I fell in love with my 'mark' and refused to return, resulting in my mother's death and my imprisonment for being a traitor to the Soviet government."

"Oh Mom," Sydney felt badly for her mother having that bit of information out there.

"And they don't know the details about it, and nothing's been confirmed from any of the government offices but somehow; the news of my Execution and last minute reprieve have also surfaced. Right now, they're just rumors but there's obviously a leak in either your government or mine. Most likely someone from the hospital. Not that it matters now. I can't hide who I am or who my mother was anymore."

"What does Vladimir think you should do?" Sydney asked softly, knowing this wasn't easy for Irina to be so exposed: her entire life out there for the world to dissect.

"Well, we all agree that I'm going to have to address the public formally and explain myself. I just wish I didn't have to do this now, when I'm dealing with Sloane and stopping this damn prophecy." She leaned her head against Lena's on her shoulder as she patted her back burping her.

"So when are you going to do this? Address the public?" Sydney walked over and sat next to Irina.

"After the New Year." She ran her hand in circles over the baby's back, rocking side to side gently. "I just want to get through the holidays first and, we're going to need to sit down and talk about all of this with the entire family. I especially need to talk to your father, as it's his life that's being aired for all to see as well as mine now. I never intended for this to happen." Irina sighed as she got up from the couch and headed for the bedroom. "But it was the only way."

"He knows you didn't have any part in making that decision, Mom. We all made it for you to save your life and none of us would ever hold you responsible for that." Sydney followed her into the bedroom where Irina was busy bundling Lena for her trip outside. "I honestly don't care what people want to know about my life as long as you're still alive and in my life, Mom, the rest I can live with."

Sydney stood quietly behind Irina and as she spoke her last sentence Irina's movements stilled. She turned around slowly with tears in her eyes, and forcefully grabbed Sydney into a tight hug.

"You're right, Sydney. Nothing else matters as long as I'm alive and with my babies."

Sydney held on tightly to Irina and they stayed in that embrace until Lena's crying separated them. She didn't like being so bundled if they weren't on the move they'd discovered earlier in the day.

"Grab your coat and let's get out of here for awhile." Irina smiled.

* * *

_***Moscow Nights***_

When they arrived at the restaurant they were shown to a table near the back, away from everyone else and next to an enormous cobblestone fireplace that was four times the normal size. The atmosphere was beautiful with the low candlelight and orange glow from the fireplace. Irina had ordered for both of them; traditional Russian favorites of hers and as they waited for their meal, began their discussion of Michael Vaughn.

"So then after he apologized for being an ass to me, that led to the discussion of relationships and you." Sydney stopped to take a sip of her tea, eyeing her mother from above the cups rim to see her reaction.

Irina's eyebrows rose only slightly with surprise but said nothing and let Sydney continue. "I won't go into the specifics of it because that is something that you need to talk with dad about, hear from him."

Irina's expression was curious but still said nothing.

"Anyway, those certain things we talked about in reference to your relationship led to him questioning the relationship that I have with Vaughn."

"Your father asked you about your relationship with Michael?" Irina genuinely seemed surprised, and she smiled.

Jack was making progress apparently in accepting their daughter was a grown-up. "How'd that go?" She reached for the pacifier that Lena had dropped causing the baby to stir in her sleep. As soon as it was replaced she sucked feverishly for a few seconds then fell into a deep sleep again.

"Well surprisingly. I'd told him that I had grown up wanting the same kind of relationship the two of you had when you were married. Finding that someone to love, and to love me. Someone who was my equal; like you and dad. The way you complete each other." She sat her cup down softly matching her tone as Irina diverted her eyes. Sydney reached across the table and took Irina's fingers in her own, giving them a light squeeze of silent support. "Dad told me how he knew you were the one for him and that if I felt the same way about Vaughn, I'd found that someone I was looking for." Sydney smiled softly meeting Irina's eyes. "I told him I did. Having Dad point out those reasons made me realize what I already knew, Vaughn is my equal. Dad said he was happy for me."

"I'm so happy for you, Sydney." Irina smiled warmly, running her thumb over her daughter's long fingers, the same fingers of her own hand. "Few people ever find that kind of love. Hold onto it, Sydney, with everything you have…hold on."

"I will." Sydney spoke slowly nodding her head with determination. She returned the smile as the waiter brought over a small basket of bread that broke up their special moment.

"If it's not too intrusive, how did the two of you meet? I know obviously through the CIA, but…" Irina buttered her Russian Rye slowly, nervously.

"You want to know about the first time we met?" Sydney smiled.

Irina gave her a small smile of admission.

"Well, now that I know all the facts, you had a part in that." She laughed coyly, keeping her mother guessing.

"Me? You mean Laura?" Irina asked softly, thinking somehow she must have been referring to the woman in Sydney's memories at that time, the woman she looked up to and respected before she found out the truth.

"No. You. Irina."

"How so?"

"I'd just found out who I was working for, what I was: a terrorist. It was just after Sloane killed Danny. I quit the job but Sloane didn't want to let me. He tried to kill me." Sydney looked across the table to see Irina's chin resting on her folded hands listening intently. "Dad saved me, though I hated him at the time. Years of silence between us and then to find out he was one of the bad guys, was too much. I didn't know he worked for the CIA as a Double inside SD-6 at the time. Anyway, I realized it would never end until I shut down Sloane. So, I went on his mission to Taipei. I broke into what I now know was one of your laboratories, to steal the Rambaldi battery. I was caught and tortured by your evil doctor. He pulled out my teeth, I paralyzed him." She shrugged her shoulders seeing the saddened look in Irina's eyes. Sydney gave her a reassuring smile. "After I got the battery I gave it to Sloane then went straight to the CIA office in LA and turned myself in. Vaughn and Eric debriefed me." She laughed softly at the memory. "I was all bloody and my face was swollen from having my teeth pulled. My hair was this wild red color. I was just a mess. Vaughn told me later he thought I was crazy when he first met me. " She laughed again earning a warm smile from Irina. "After that he became my handler and for a long time, the only person I could trust."

"I wasn't in Taipei at the time you were caught." Irina poured them both another cup of tea, breaking into her own explanation. "I'd heard immediately they'd captured someone trying to break into the lab, a female, but that was the only information I had. It was only after you'd escaped and I went to Taipei, saw the security footage of the woman, that I knew it was you." She gave Sydney a lopsided grin laden with apology. "I'd heard over the years of a female agent working for Sloane at SD-6 that was incredible." She smiled. "No one knew anything about her, she was that good. Somewhere in the back of my mind was a nagging feeling that it was you, my daughter. My Sydney. But I didn't want it to be you, in this life. My fears were confirmed when I saw you on that tape. My little girl all grown up and I couldn't help but feel proud of you for escaping the way you did. I didn't tell anyone that I knew who you were. They discovered that later on, with our repeated run-ins with you over the year. I trained Anna Espinosa," She paused slightly seeing the shock register on Sydney's face. "She was one of the Project Christmas children along with Julian. It was part of my 're-education,' to use the knowledge I'd obtained from your father and train a class of child spies. They were the first and only class I trained. Cuvee brought Anna into his syndicate right away."

"K- Directorate." Sydney stated and Irina nodded.

"Yes and then came that fateful night in Taipei, when you were captured after blowing up my lab." Irina gave her a knowing smile shaking her head before taking a deep breath, her light tone dissipating as she continued. "Cuvee wanted me to prove my allegiance to our partnership by shooting you. It was a sick double play for him. It was not only a way to prove my loyalty, but sheer enjoyment that his reprogramming of me had worked. I was now shooting the daughter I fought desperately to save when I was arrested on Treason." She paused again, looking idly down at her hands nervously before looking up to meet Sydney's, "When I walked into that room," She let out a small gasp, "You were so beautiful and it tore me apart to see the effect my words were having on you. I wanted nothing more then to take you in my arms and hold you forever. But I knew I couldn't, I had to get us both out of this situation. I knew that no matter what information I got out of you, or what I did to you, Gerard wasn't going to let you go and the thought of what he would do to you, my daughter…I couldn't let that happen. So I shot you and gave you the time to escape, hoping you would see I put you in that room, in that chair for a reason…and you did." She smiled and reached over the table clasping Sydney's fingers in her own. "I'd already been planning on way to take down SD-6 and the Alliance for some time; using the CIA, and when I realized that you were a Double agent with them after Barcelona, I couldn't help but feel anxious, excited at seeing you again. I thought I might have a little time to establish some sort of relationship with you, explain myself a little before I escaped. What I didn't count on, or rather I fooled myself into believing, was how hard it was to leave you again. All the feelings I'd had for you and your father that I'd locked up and dare not think about. The feelings I thought I could keep compartmentalizing, controlling, were threatening to over-take me. I began doubting my plans. I thought I was the one in the Prophecy; it was up to me to stop Sloane, to keep you safe. And then after I escaped, information Sloane had on Rambaldi led me to believe it was you in the Prophecy and it was up to you to stop him. I knew that by betraying you a second time, I'd lost all chances of any kind of relationship with you." Irina's eyes got teary, as did Sydney's. "So I gave you all I could on Sloane and Rambaldi, told you I loved you…and let go." She let go of one of Sydney's hands to wipe the stream of tears running down her cheek.

The double meaning behind those words were not lost on Sydney. Irina had not only let go of the ledge that night in Mexico, but she'd let go of Sydney and Jack and any hope of forgiveness and a relationship with them in the future.

"I am so sorry, Sydney. For all of the tears and pain I've caused you. There will never be enough time or words to show you just how sorry I am. Anything I do will never be enough."

"Mom, I accept your apology. I know you love me. All that matters to me now, is that you're here with me now. And I know you won't hurt me again. I trust you." She took a shaky breath and wiped her own tears through a smile when she saw a new wave of tears pooling in Irina's eyes at hearing Sydney trusted her, forgave her. "All I ever wanted was this. To have my mother in my life, the person I loved and still love, more then anyone even Vaughn. My mother. You. You, just you are enough, Mom. You've always been the most important person in my life, even when you weren't physically in it." Her smile reached her eyes, "You don't have to keep trying to prove yourself, prove your love. I know. I feel it. You're enough, Mom. You're all I need."

"Sydney," Irina barely choked out just above a whisper, emotion overwhelming her with Sydney's forgiveness. There were no words to express how much it meant, how it made her feel in that moment. Irina stood and walked around the table, leaned over and kissed Sydney's cheek before engulfing her in an enormous hug, holding on tightly as they both cried happy tears. "I love you. Thank you."

"You're welcome. And I love you, too." She smiled as Irina pulled back and knelt in front of where she was sitting. Sydney took her hands and wiped the tears from her mother's cheeks, and in a move that mimicked their previous actions twenty some years before, Irina reached up and stilled Sydney's hands against her cheeks, closing her eyes and smiling as the tears continued to fall.

Sydney's hands were no longer the chubby little ones she remembered and had recalled in her dreams many times in one of their final 'goodbyes' before she left.

Irina opened her eyes and pulled Sydney's hands away, kissing both palms and then her cheeks. The look in Sydney's eyes told Irina she remembered, too.

"To the moon and back, more then the stars in the heavens and the grains of sands on Earth." Sydney smiled brightly, causing Irina to do the same.

"Forever and always." Irina kissed her one last time on the cheek as the waiter approached carrying their dinner.

After dinner they decided to go for a walk along the river on the boardwalk. The beautiful Moscow lights illuminating their way.

The temperature had warmed up considerably, surprisingly, though it was still freezing compared to Southern California and certainly Jakarta.

Irina had put Lena into the Baby Bjorn harness and she was now comfortably sound asleep against Irina's soft sweater, protected from the harsh cold outside by her mother's warm fur coat.

"So after our mission together in Kashmir," Irina began as they walked along the practically deserted walkway. "I said I knew you had a lot of questions. A great majority of them, I think, you have answers to now, but is there anything else you'd like to know?"

"I don't know." Sydney kicked a tuft of snow as they walked along. "There's so much I still don't know about you."

"Well ask away." Irina braced herself.

"What's your favorite take-out?" Sydney asked after a moment of thinking.

Irina paused momentarily with a small surprised smile. "Of all the questions you could ask?" She laughed and continued walking, answering her question. "Chinese, and yours?"

"The same. Chinese. What's your favorite color?"

"Black."

"As if I couldn't tell." Sydney laughed eyeing Irina's black hat and coat, noting her outfit was solid black as well as most of the items she saw in the closet.

"And yours?" Irina laughed with her.

"Red." They both said simultaneously.

"How did you?" Sydney gave her a curious look.

"It was always your favorite crayon." Irina smiled remembering Sydney's determination to color everything in her pictures red as a child. "And then of course when you've gone on missions you seem to choose red for your hair and wardrobe. Like tonight, your red sweater."

Sydney shook her head in awe at her mother's observations once again.

"Favorite movie?"

"Oh God, there are many." Irina rolled her eyes trying to think. "Well, I can't stand to watch most action spy movies. They do it all wrong and it drives me insane to watch. I remember watching _James Bond: The Spy Who Loved Me_, with your father when you were about two years old."

Seeing Sydney's eyebrows shoot up in surprise she laughed.

"Yes I know. It was very ironic watching a movie with your father about a British and Soviet spy falling in love during the Cold War while I was actually living the life. What drove me insane though, was that the female agent Triple X, I think that was her name, was portrayed as such an incompetent! Like just because she was a woman, she was a lesser spy, having to be rescued all the time by James Bond. It drove me nuts, still does if I think about it." She laughed, as did Sydney, agreeing with her.

"What about romantic movies?" Sydney hedged along.

_***Rhapsody On A Theme Of Paganini - Variation 18***_

"Well, I tended to stay away from those. They made me think about your father and that wasn't an option. But, I suppose my favorite romantic movie would have to be _Somewhere In Time_. It was the last film I saw with your father before I was extracted." She sighed softly, "The irony of that was not lost on me either. That the last film I saw with your father, was about a love so strong he went back in time to find her, beyond his obsessions, beyond his fantasies, beyond time itself he was determined to find her."

"You wanted dad to come find you…in Kashmir?" Sydney remembered her mother's cries for her father on the tape from prison and had to shake her head to get rid of the image.

"I'd be lying to you if I said I didn't." Irina stopped and sat on a bench overlooking the city. "But I realized that was never going to happen." She replied softly. "Life isn't like it is in the movies."

"That isn't true." Sydney sat be-side her, shaking her head before turning to Irina. "We did find each other again and after you left, and we found out the truth, beyond the fantasy, beyond dad's obsession, beyond the time… of all the years we'd been apart…dad was determined to find you. And he did in St. Petersburg." She smiled, sinking further into her furry coat seeking warmth.

"Yes, he did." Irina smiled in disbelief that Sydney made that connection.

"Mom, will you tell me about the first time you met dad? I mean how you orchestrated it, what you first thought of him?" She asked nervously.

"Well, first of all, I didn't orchestrate it. Our first meeting was purely accidental. I didn't even know at the time that your father was to be my mark." Irina adjusted her coat so that she could see Lena, make sure she had enough air.

"What do you mean?" Sydney was surprised to hear this.

"The way the Soviet system of foreign espionage worked, it was three phases. In the first phase, they sent an agent to their new country and the only objective during this phase was to become familiar with your new identity, your new life. You made yourself comfortable with your surroundings, your language and the people; so that you literally became part of their culture. This is your sole objective as an agent at that time. Phase One usually lasted six months to a year. It isn't until Phase Two that you are informed of your objective and who your mark will be." Irina leaned back against the bench.

"So you didn't know that dad was your mark before you came over here?" Sydney couldn't believe how much she didn't know. In her mind, from the moment she found out who her mother was, she had envisioned her mother as a ruthless KGB agent who's sole objective had been to seek out and destroy her father. She knew now, over the last few months that hadn't exactly been true, but she still hadn't lost the notion that Irina knew what she was doing when she came to the US.

"No. I didn't know he was my mark until about six months after I arrived when my handler handed me his file but I already knew him. Which, my handler knew of course from keeping tabs on me. He passed that information on to Cuvee. I was instructed to maintain a relationship I'd already begun."

Sydney's eyes were practically bugging out of her head. Her parent's relationship had started before Irina received her orders to seduce him.

"You said you met dad by accident?"

Irina smiled widely at the memory. "Yes. That's right. About two months after I arrived in Washington and began school, I was walking down the steps after class, carrying an enormous stack of books when this, wild man with thick curly hair in sunglasses plowed into me from behind sending my books and papers everywhere. I was so angry, swearing to myself as I tried to gather my papers blowing in the wind. I didn't even look up at your father as he was helping me, apologizing profusely, rambling on incessantly. When he was handing me the last of my papers, our hands brushed briefly and I just... I don't know felt this shock of sorts, nothing I'd ever felt before. I snapped my head up to look at him as I pulled my hand away from him. He stopped mid-sentence to stare at me… and he broke into this big smile, just sat there, looking at me. It was an uncomfortable situation. At least for me, I was new to this country and had to shake myself to remember why I was here." Irina suddenly began speaking in English, recanting the memory in the language it was made in.

_"Jack." He extended his hand to her._

_ "What?" She shook her head, looking down at her books as she shuffled them. _

_ "My name is Jack." He smiled and laughed that made her feel butterflies in her stomach._

_ "That's nice." Irina reached forward and quickly shook his hand before standing. She took off at an incredible pace down the sidewalk, she had to get away from this guy; she couldn't get sidetracked from her mission. She could hear Jack laughing behind her and then the rapid footsteps as he ran to catch up with her. _

_ "Hey slow down there." He reached out tentatively, taking hold of her upper arm. She stopped at the contact of his hand on her bare arm, frozen. "I didn't catch your name?" He gave her another infectious playboy smile. _

_ Irina could tell this guy must have been a, ladies man; a playboy, who was used to getting any woman he wanted. 'Well not this woman!' She told herself._

_ "That's because I didn't give it to you." She looked directly into his eyes before sidestepping him and continuing on her way. _

_ Jack followed, walking backwards so that he could look at her. _

_ "What's your hurry?" He jogged backwards, still smiling as he nodded at people they passed, he knew. _

_ "I have class in ten minutes. I don't have time for this." She refused to look at him._

_ "You're a tough one aren't you?" Jack cocked his head to the side, analyzing her. "Let me hear you say, 'dog?"_

_ "What?" She snapped her head to look at him. What kind of request was that? What was it with American men?_

_ "I want to hear you say 'dog.' Please?" He flashed her another brilliant grin as he leaped backwards over the curb, slipping slightly on a patch of ice._

_ "Dog!" She shouted at him, shaking her head at this crazy man. _

_ "Now, coffee." Jack instructed. _

_ "What? No. Why are you asking me these silly questions?" She picked up her pace, annoyed by the man already._

_ "Let's just call is research. Now, come on. You already said dog for me, let me hear coffee." He was enjoying the fact she was getting flustered._

_ She threw a deathly glare at him. "Fine. Coffee. And what kind of research is this?" _

_ "Your 'dog' told me you aren't from Boston, and your 'coffee' means you aren't a New Yorker. You didn't say 'like' in every sentence or speak a million miles an hour, so you can't be from California but it was your 'no' that gave you away." He smiled smugly. "That was a very Scandinavian sounding 'o' and combined with the facts that you're carrying a lot of books, means you're strong. I already know your tough, and from the selections of the books your holding, I'm guessing you're pretty intelligent. You're a Mid-Western farmer's daughter aren't you? Minnesota? Nebraska?" He enjoyed her obvious surprise at his knowledge of 'her,' especially since it was her alias._

_ "Iowa." She gave him a brief smile before looking away and that was all he needed for encouragement._

_ "Iowa." He repeated with a smile, "They do amazing things with corn I hear." _

_ She gave him another death glare. "Are you finished interrogating me now?" She stopped in front of the glass doors of the English Department building. Her tone that of complete annoyance. _

_ "No, you still haven't told me your name?" He leaned against the glass door, smug smile still in place. _

_ "Goodbye, Jack." She shook her head and disappeared behind the doors. _

_ "Have a good day, Iowa!" _

_ She heard him yell through the doors behind her, causing her to break into a smile while her back was turned. _

"Who knew dad was such a comedian?" Sydney giggled in surprise, smiling ear to ear having heard the story of the first meeting between her parents. "So then what happened?"

"He was annoying in his persistence." Irina smiled softly at the memory.

"He knew what he wanted." Sydney smiled brightly, leaning over to nudge Irina softly. "So come on, what happened next?"

"Well, once he knew where I had class on Thursdays, he was waiting outside the building on the following Thursday."

_ "Hey Iowa!" Jack leapt off the stone railing of the steps when he saw her whiz past him. _

_ "Now what?" Irina sighed when she saw him running up along side of her._

_ "Can I help you carry your books?" He reached for the stack of books. _

_ She turned away from him sharply. _

_ "No thanks, I can handle them on my own." She picked up her pace wishing the English building was closer. _

_ "You should have a book bag to carry all of those." Jack stuffed his hands into his pockets. _

_ "I'm still waiting." She glanced at him briefly, avoiding eye contact._

_ "Waiting for what?" Jack asked confused._

_ "For you to tell me what it is you want from me? You want me to take a test for you or something because you can forget that! And I have no interest in tutoring someone who's only intention is to 'make a move' on me." She tucked her hair behind her ear, as a mesmerized Jack smiled. _

_ Since her arrival, she'd been hit on with every lame come-on line and move there was from every guy she encountered. American college boys only had one thing on their minds she deduced. Sex. They'd been taught that over and over in the Soviet Union that American men were ruled by their sexual drives, which was supposed to make her assignment that much easier. After a couple of months here, she'd experienced it first hand._

_ "I'm fairly intelligent on my own so I don't need you to take any tests for me, and I certainly don't need a tutor though spending some time with you wouldn't be so bad." _

_ She gave him a stern look that screamed of her annoyance._

_ "I just enjoyed our little chat the other day and wanted to talk with you again." He shrugged with the same smile she had memorized now, ingrained in her memory. It was hard to forget._

_ Irina didn't say anything in response, just kept walking in silence until they reached the building. He opened the door and motioned her in. _

_ "Have a nice day, Iowa." Jack smiled brightly at the strange look she was giving him on her way by. _

"So, he _was_ stalking you!" Sydney laughed at the irony.

"Yes, he was." Irina smiled as she stood. "We should keep walking to stay warm."

Sydney stood and followed alongside Irina. She was completely enthralled hearing this story of her parents.

"Then what?" She prompted her mother with an enormous smile that reminded Irina of the little girl she once was.

"I ran into him that weekend in the Smithsonian."

_"Well hello, Iowa. Fancy running into you here." Jack flashed his bright smile as he came to stand be-side her, looking at the enormous African elephant on display. He could hear her sigh and then finally, shaking her head in disbelief, smiled at him fully for the first time. Jack felt his breath catch in his throat and heart momentarily still. _

_ "I could have you arrested for stalking me." _

_ "I'm not stalking you." He put his hands up in mock surrender. "Seems that fate has decided to keep intertwining our life paths." _

_ "That's very philosophical. What are you a Psych major?" She laughed slightly and stepped around him, moving on to the next exhibit, crossing her arms over her chest. _

_ "Nope, definitely not. International Relations." He followed her._

_ "Really," She stopped and looked up at him, her finger lightly tracing her bottom lip and hypnotizing Jack. "Interesting."_

_ "If you say so." Jack shrugged. "I don't have to ask what your major is, your books gave you away. English Literature, am I right?"_

_ "Yes." She answered softly, smiling at his obvious nervousness around her. _

_ "You take school pretty seriously don't you?" He watched her every moment, committing it to memory. She was graceful in her movements and her beauty was breathtaking. The way people would stare at her as she passed didn't go unnoticed by Jack. She was the most exotic looking farm girl he'd ever seen. He smiled to himself with the thought he finally engaged her in a conversation. _

_ "Yes. I do take my studies seriously. Don't you?" She walked towards the exit, pausing just briefly to make sure he was following as she zipped her coat. _

_ "Well yes, of course. But I also like to have fun and besides, I'm almost finished." Jack saw the invitation to follow and jumped on it. _

_ "Then aren't you concerned about finding a job with your approaching graduation?" Her eyebrows furrowed with concentration trying to understand these 'American' motivations as they walked down the mall._

_ "No, actually I've already got a job. I've had it a few years now." He shuffled behind her, guiding her into a café `in search of something warm to drink._

_ "Really? Doing what?" She asked standing in line._

_ "Research." Jack answered while staring straight at the menu, pretending to look over the coffee choices, which were black and de-cafe at the time. Hoping she wouldn't ask more questions. _

_ "Research?" She looked at him quizzically and then dropped it. _

_ "How do you like your coffee, Iowa? It's my treat." Jack smiled, melting when she returned the smile. _

_ "Black." She smiled at the nickname that had stuck. She still hadn't given him her first name._

_ "Black." Jack repeated, raising his eyebrows impressed. _

_ They'd spent the rest of the day and evening walking around the mall, and monuments, chatting on a variety of subjects and nothing too revealing but developing their obvious connection. Jack also discovered it was her birthday and decided he must take her out to celebrate. _

_ They'd shared dinner: Chinese, and a bottle of wine to celebrate the occasion and it was then that Jack heard her infectious laugh for the first time. There was only one word he could use to describe her 'enchanting.' The wine had helped them both to lose inhibitions._

**_*Brown Eyed Girl*_**

_ "Isn't D.C. beautiful?" Jack asked her, amazed by the beauty of the city lights and Christmas decorations, feeling it add to the romantic mood he was in; the sparkle in her big, brown eyes keeping him entranced._

_ Irina stopped walking to look at her surroundings, really 'look' for the first time since she arrived and saw the beauty in the city and atmosphere he was talking about. She couldn't explain it, or rationalize her connection to this guy but he was 'doing' things to her, changing her internally and her views on what life in America was going to be like. _

_ "It is beautiful." She smiled, wrapping her arms around herself for comfort and warmth watching Jack out of the corner of her eye. She was trying very hard not to fall for the man in front of her, knowing she had an assignment to do. She was told to make friends, encouraged to do so by her superiors to establish herself in this life but she also knew she would have a very hard time keeping her relationship with Jack strictly friends. _

_ "I should go home now." She said suddenly and began walking away, trying to escape him before anything else happened. She couldn't trust herself, especially after the wine. This business was still new to her. She'd completed many assignments in her trial period before getting this assignment and passed with flying colors. But none of those men were this man. This man was different._

_ "Wait. Where do you live? Maybe we can share a cab?" He smiled catching up with her._

_ "Here, in Georgetown. Just a few blocks away." She had no idea why she had answered him. 'Yes you do,' she internally admonished herself at her lack of willpower with this man. _

_ "Perfect. I only live a few blocks from here, too." He stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets trying to ward off the cold._

_ "Why would you offer to share a cab then, if you live here in Georgetown?" She didn't need an answer when he shrugged and she saw his mischievous grin._

_ When they arrived at three-story, brick-stone apartment building, she'd called home, he offered to walk her up to her apartment on the third floor and she let him, trying the entire way to calm her shaky hands and butterflies. _

_ '302' She stopped in front of the door, leaning against it as Jack nervously took a step toward her._

_ "I had a wonderful time with you today, Iowa." He smiled nervously, fidgeting where he stood for the first time in his life, nervous around a woman. She was different from the others and he knew it. Never mind the fact he didn't even know her name. He wanted so badly to lean in and kiss her, unsure if he should or not. _

_ Irina saw his intention and his hesitance. She quickly had an internal battle with herself over her options, finally deciding that she wasn't going to start her assignment for the next four months and what was the harm in it? She had no idea, that decision would change the rest of her life forever. Her eyes shifted from his down to his slightly parted lips, leaning in just slightly. _

_ That was all the invitation Jack needed and stepped forward, closing the last of the distance between them. His mouth descended quickly upon her lips in a kiss that literally stole their breath away. His hand resting against her cheek as he pulled away looking into her eyes._

_ "Your eyes are the most beautiful things I've ever seen." He smiled brightly, in awe and turned on his heel. "Goodnight, Iowa."_

_ Just as he hit the top of the staircase she yelled softly, "Laura!"_

_ "What?" He paused half-stride, unsure of what he'd heard._

_ "My name…is Laura." She smiled shyly, feeling herself blush._

_ "Laura." Jack repeated it. The name rolling off of his tongue like a sweet melody to his ears and to hers even if it wasn't her own. _

_ "Goodnight, Laura." He smiled brightly speaking softly._

_ "Goodnight, Jack." Irina entered her apartment, closed the doors and slid down the back of the door, resting her head back looking toward the sky. "Oh God, what have I done?" She whispered, her concern for letting this man into her life, quickly replaced by a smile in the dark, thinking of him and his kiss._

"Those four months before I found out my assignment," Irina sighed, holding back tears with a smile, "Were amazing. I felt such a sense of complete freedom with Jack in those months. And part of me was elated when I'd learned that he was the CIA agent who'd been assigned as my mark. I was selfish. I didn't want to give him up and if stealing secrets from him was the only way I could keep him." She shook her head and looked away into the darkness, "The rest is history as we know it." Irina was glowing the entire time she recanted the story to Sydney, feeling another freedom in sharing it with her daughter. The only other soul she'd told about how she and Jack met was Katya.

"You never told dad this, did you?" Sydney could hardly contain her smile at what she'd just heard but also saw the look in her mother's eyes.

Irina smiled shyly and shook her head no, she hadn't, while she reached into her coat to stroke the top of Lena's head.

"What is it with you two?" Sydney shook her head at the obvious lack of communication between her parents lately. "You haven't told him things he needs to hear like the first four months of your relationship had nothing to do with your KGB assignment, and he hasn't told you things you need to hear-"

"Like what?" Irina's interest was peaked.

"I'm not going to tell you. He needs to tell you and you need to tell him." Sydney shook her head vehemently with an astonished smile. "I can't believe you haven't told him that yet."

"We haven't exactly had the opportunity to talk about it." Irina shrugged, sinking deeper into her own coat feeling the biting breeze on her cheeks.

"You mean, the past?"

"Yes." Irina admitted, "It's something neither of us has been willing to bring up. But it's glaringly obvious now that we have to deal with it before we can move forward." She took a deep breath and when she exhaled, could see her breath. Looking toward the sky, she realized it had begun to snow again. Large fluffy flakes falling all around them.

"I think you're both ready to move forward. You just need to talk about it. Right now it's just this big, pink elephant in the room that you're both terrified of, when really you have nothing to be afraid of anymore." Sydney turned her palm up to catch a beautiful flake on her glove, watching as it slowly melted away.

"You are far too perceptive sometimes." Irina laughed softly at her daughter, continually amazed by her.

"That's exactly what dad said." Sydney smiled. "But it's easier to see things when you're on the outside. Like with Vaughn and I. You saw us before we did. He came to me, a few days after he was released from the hospital and he told me how he felt about me. That it drove him nuts when I was on missions and he couldn't sleep." She paused and turned to look at Irina, "You'd told me that when we were on the plane to India. That was weeks before Vaughn told me and yet you knew that. He eventually told me later that it was you who had made him realize that he needed to tell me how he felt. That tomorrow isn't always guaranteed, and to hell with the CIA rules! Go with the rules 'between a man and a woman.' He said telling you, how he felt about me, was what you wanted in return for telling him where the anti-dote was."

"My mother had told me," Irina took hold of Sydney's hand, "That love abides by no man-made rules, only those of the heart. I didn't want the two of you wasting time because of some ridiculous rules the CIA had in place."

Sydney remembered those words as the last her grandmother had said to her mother before she was executed. "Thank you." Sydney smiled brightly, snuggling in closer to Irina as they walked. Linking arms, "I don't know if I ever told you or not but the watch you gave Mikhail on his birthday, the one with the inscription?"

"Yes." Irina remembered the watch but had no idea how Sydney knew about it or where she was going with it.

"Well, Vaughn inherited it after his father left. The night Vaughn told me how he felt about me he told me about his father's watch, and that it stopped the day he met me," She paused to gauge Irina's reaction, "October 1st. Do you remember what your inscription said?"

"Yes," Irina nodded, that moment thirty years ago flooding back to her, "Be still my heart when true love finds you."

The irony the watch stopped the day Michael met her daughter was not lost on her.

"It was dated October 1st, 1970" Sydney continued, seeing the awe in her mother's reaction.

"The same day." Irina breathed barely above a whisper. The date combined with the inscription and the people involved, was utterly fascinating. "That is amazing; a testament that our love wasn't meant to be, but that our children were destined for each other. I just…that's amazing."

"Yeah, I know. We were pretty amazed when we realized it, too." Sydney shivered feeling the cold seeping into her bones as they arrived at the front of the hotel where Irina's suite was.

"Perfect timing." Irina unbuttoned her coat as Lena announced she was awake and hungry with her cries.

"So what other questions would you like answers to?" Irina curled her legs up under her as she took a seat on the sofa, feeding Lena and waiting for Sydney to bring in their hot chocolate from the kitchen.

"There are so many things I want to ask you about. I don't know where to start next." Sydney placed the steaming mug on the coffee table in front of her mother, taking a seat on the opposite end of the same sofa. "How about the day I was born? Was it as insane as the day Lena was born?"

_***Kung Fu Fighting***_

"The day you were born." Irina lit up with an enormous smile. "Oh, it was just as eventful; maybe not quite as dramatic as giving birth in prison but, eventful none the less. You were my first after all and I was only twenty. I was scared to death. I had no idea how to be a mother." She admitted and then laughed thinking about it. "Your father had been out of town on a mission and was flying home that day. I went into labor at around four in the morning but didn't realize it until about six. I called Emily Sloane shortly there after and she came over right away and picked me up and took me to the hospital." She smiled softly at Sydney, remembering the pain of losing her old friend and Sydney's loss of the woman she'd considered her mother then. "That had been the plan if your father was still gone when I went into labor. I called and left a message with his superiors before we left but had no idea if he would get it. When we got to the hospital the contractions were relentless and excruciating. Never in my life had I experienced pain like that up to that point in my life. I was crazy, screaming for your father. I was terrified he wasn't going to make it, and make me go through labor all on my own. The nurses were having a hell of a time trying to keep me calm as the contractions came faster and faster. There were no pain drugs and I felt badly for Emily who looked positively horrified at how much pain I was in. I remember the music at that time playing over the hospital intercom was _Kung Fu Fighting_, and although hilarious to think about now, it was very appropriate music for that time. I was so feisty with everyone. Definitely in a fighting mood and heaven help the next person who walked into my room."

Sydney was hit with uncontrollable laughter the moment her mother mentioned the song, envisioning the, lethal Irina Derevko in labor and ready to kick-ass with _Kung Fu Fighting_ in the background.

"If you think that's funny, you'll love the song that was playing when your father finally arrived. He'd gone straight home from the airport and finding me, and my bag absent, rushed to the hospital. He looked like hell but the moment he stepped foot in the door I went ballistic on him."

_***Why Can't We Be Friends***_

"_Why Can't We Be Friends?_ was playing in the background the entire time I was screaming at him for, doing this to me in the first place and then, leaving me alone to go through it by myself. I wanted him to get his, ass over here and hold my hand and then screamed when he made a move to, stay the fuck away from me, if I remember the wording correctly. The poor man looked terrified to come near me. I'm sure I looked worse then Regan did possessed in _The Exorcist_." Irina laughed uncontrollably as Sydney about fell on the floor convulsing with laughter picturing the scene.

_***Father and Daughter***_

"But the moment the doctor said it was time to push, your father braved my wrath and was at my side in a heartbeat. I, of course, turned into a sobbing mess, begging him not to leave me. Pregnancy hormones do strange things to you." She shook her head laughing, "He promised he wouldn't of course and the moment the doctor told us you were a girl and laid you on my abdomen was the most beautiful, perfect moment of my life." She smiled with unshed tears of happiness remembering perfectly that moment.

"I'd never loved your father more then in that moment when I looked down and saw for the first time the child we created out of love for one another. You made my life in America real; you were the one thing in my life that wasn't tainted with a lie. Our child created because of the love we shared for each other, and that was the truth. And they took you away and then brought you back and your father placed you in my arms. He was crying and I was crying. And looking down at you while you nursed it suddenly felt like being your mother was the most natural thing in the world. Your father and I both marveled at just how easily the love for you came. The second we heard your cry you'd become the most important thing in both our lives and we'd do anything to protect you, keep you from harm. Something we'd heard about, but couldn't grasp ourselves until that moment." Irina sighed taking hold of Sydney's hand again. "You won't fully understand what I'm talking about, how much I love you, until you have a child of your own. My mother said the same thing to me when she was worried about me. And she was right. I never understood until you."

Sydney was smiling radiantly hearing the story of her birth and how it'd changed her parents.

"Thank you." Sydney leaned forward to hug her mother, "For sharing all of these moments, memories with me. It means so much to me. I love you Mom."

"I know." Irina hugged her back with the one arm that was free, "And I love you, Sweetheart."

* * *

"So now where are we off to?" Sydney smiled at Irina sitting beside her in the back seat of the limo the next morning.

"Well, every Christmas for the last thirteen years, I buy gifts for the orphans." Irina smiled warmly thinking about their cute cherubic faces lighting up with excitement, "I've done it every year except last." She gave a wiry smile to Sydney remembering how she'd spent last Christmas in her glass prison at the CIA. "I like to give the gifts to them myself. There's nothing quite like seeing three and four year olds open gifts, especially with these children. It's a chance for them to receive something all their own." She pulled out a stack of paper from her leather briefcase and gave it to Sydney with a smile. "Their wish lists. One is what the children want, the other is what they need: clothes, shoes, etc."

"There are at least a hundred names on this list." Sydney smiled bewildered at yet another fascinating aspect of her mother.

"That's just the Moscow orphanage." Irina laughed softly, "That's not including St. Petersburg's list which is far more complex."

"Why?"

"Well, a couple of years ago I re-organized the orphanages after the horrors that were happening in them after the fall of the Soviet Union. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about?" Irina shook her with a mixture of sadness and anger thinking about it as Sydney nodded she did.

"Anyway, we decided to separate the younger ones from the older ones. When we built the new orphanages and schools here in Moscow and St. Petersburg we decided to keep the newborns and toddlers here, where it's easier for adoptions, as most people want the younger ones sadly; and the older ones, ages six to sixteen in St. Petersburg where they're away from the trouble of Moscow. A lot of these kids will never be adopted and are released from the government's custody on their sixteenth birthday. Before the change, they became homeless, working the streets here in Moscow, getting into drugs, prostitution, contracting and dying of AIDS. It was terrible. Now that we've moved them to St. Petersburg, they have an excellent success rate upon their release. I try to give them best head start I can by getting them into college right away, and so far it's working. "

"That's amazing." Sydney stated in awe as she read through the kids lists. "There are so many of them."

"I know. It's sad, isn't it?" Irina sighed, "But there are a lot less then there were a decade ago. A decade ago, there were no jobs, no homes, no health care. A lot of parents had to give up their children to keep them from dying from starvation. It's a horrible situation to be in as a parent. To give your child up to keep them alive," She reached across the seat and squeezed Sydney's hand, giving her a small smile, knowing all to well how hard it is. "We've done many things to improve the situation and it is working. Our economy is up, people are getting healthier both physically and mentally. A lot is changing…has changed, in Russia."

"You've done an amazing job, Mom." Sydney gave her a dimple faced grin, "I'm still grappling with the fact that you rule Russia." She laughed at how absurd that sounded and then at the reality that it was true. "You never cease to amaze me."

"Neither do you." Irina returned the smile and soft chuckle as she watched the Moscow streets fly by.

"So how can I help, Santa?" Sydney handed the list back to Irina; smile permanently affixed to her face.

"Well, you can start by telling me who _Bob the Builder_ is." Irina laughed looking over the list.

"Who?" Sydney took the list reading what Irina was looking at and laughing hysterically that a toy could be named as such.

"_Dora the Explorer?_ Suddenly children's toys have occupations? Whatever happened to Cookie Monster?" Irina took back part of the list, sharing in the laughter. "Ah ha!" She pointed to a request for stuffed Cookie Monster and Elmo.

"He's still around?" Sydney thought back to her own childhood remembering _Cowabunga_ and _Oh-boy-oh-boy-oh-boy _almost thirty years later.

"He's older then you!" Irina held in her laugh as she replied with her best stoic voice, "He's obviously survived the mid-life crisis that Burt and Ernie didn't."

Sydney burst into hysterics at how funny Irina was turning out to be. She remembered her being funny when she was little, but then what kid doesn't think their parents are funny when they're little? These last few weeks, had been her only real observation of her mother as an adult outside the guarded glass, and emotions of the CIA.

"Oh my god, Mom, you're hilarious!" Sydney kept giggling as the pulled up to the front of a massive toy department store.

"I have my moments." Irina shrugged with a grin as she adjusted Lena's blanket in the car seat

* * *

Four hours, a million laughs and thousands of dollars later, Irina's limo followed by five delivery vans pulled in behind the orphanage set just outside the city limits in one of the nicer suburbs.

The new building was three stories, brick covered and beautiful.

"Irina!" An older grandmotherly-looking type woman emerged from the building, shoulders draped in a traditional shawl and obviously shivering.

Irina took two steps to greet her and shared a warm embrace with smiles as the men in the vans began carrying in the hundreds of boxes of gifts.

"It's been so long! We missed you last year!" She cupped Irina's cheeks to look at her.

"I was unavoidably detained." Irina replied with a small smile and quick wink to Sydney. "Svetlana did ok filling in for me though, no?"

"Of course! She was wonderful! But we still missed you!" The older woman smiled warmly, peering to look at the curious young woman standing a few feet behind Irina holding a covered car seat.

"And this beautiful creature must be your daughter, Sydney." She smiled, pronouncing Sydney with a thick Russian accent as she switched to English. "I've seen your picture in the papers and on TV! Your mother has become something of a celebrity around here." She laughed as Irina began to blush, something Sydney didn't think possible. "Though we've known for years just how special Irina is to Russia with all the wonderful things she's done for the children." She turned back to Irina with a teasing scolding tone, "Though I had no idea that you were, 'the Romanov!' I suspected, but you, little sneak, never said a word! Not to mention some big secret 'spy!' You are a woman of many talents I see."

Irina just smiled with an apologetic shrug taking the car seat with Lena from Sydney.

"Oksana," She gently ran her hand down Sydney's arm, moving to stand beside her, "I'd love to introduce you to my girls. Sydney, this lovely woman is Oksana, or as she's known around her, Babushka, my trusted friend who looks after all my 'little ones.'"

The woman's face immediately lit up hearing Irina speak so highly of her.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Sydney." The woman greeted her in broken English with an enormous smile. "You are as beautiful as your mother." The woman grabbed her in a fierce hug, surprising Sydney.

"It's wonderful to meet you, too." Sydney replied in almost flawless Russian, surprising the woman in turn. "And thank you, Oksana."

"You speak almost perfect Russian!" The older woman pulled her back to look at her, switching to Russian herself. "How wonderful!" She smiled happily between Irina and Sydney, "But please call me Babushka!" She playfully pinched Sydney's cheek, "And who's the little one hiding under there?" She nodded toward the car seat with an enormous smile.

"This Sleeping Beauty is our Lena," Irina smiled as she flipped the blanket back just enough to reveal the sleeping baby, snuggly warm under her white fur.

"Oh, she's so tiny! And beautiful!" The woman ran her fingers lightly over Lena's head before returning the warm blanket covering. "Irina, I had no idea you were even expecting until I read it in the paper that you'd had a baby!" She shivered, wrapping her arms around her tightly.

"Let's go inside, its freezing out here and you don't have a coat on!" Irina herded them towards the big wooden doors.

"The children are so excited to see you! It's all they've been talking about for weeks!" Babushka showed them through the doors and into the giant, main room.

A big, beautiful Christmas tree decorated in blue and white lights sat at its center. It was the largest Christmas tree Sydney had seen in her life other than the one at Rockefeller Center in New York, but this one was indoors. It nearly scraped the ceiling.

Irina had instructed the men with the gifts to leave them piled up around the base of the tree and the giant stacks of gifts now surrounded it.

"The children are all waiting upstairs. Do you want me to have the nurses bring them down in groups?" She took their coats from them, handing the heavy fur coats off to a shy young woman who was obviously an assistant and in awe of Irina, Sydney thought, as she couldn't stop staring at her only to look away nervously when Irina returned the eye contact.

"No, no! Don't make them wait! You know I love the chaos anyway." Irina smiled brightly as she situated her sleeping baby near the big, red, plush chair she was going to be sitting in watching the children.

"I thought you'd say that." The woman chuckled with a smile, "I'll bring them all down. Get ready!" She raised her eyebrows at Sydney with a deep laugh.

Sydney looked quickly to Irina who gave her the same bright smile with a small laugh.

"There will be one little girl in particular that will be ecstatic to meet you." Babushka added mysteriously before disappearing into the other room.

Less then a minute later, the sounds of hundreds of little feet could be heard thundering overhead and down the steps as small Russian voices cried out in excitement.

As soon as the first wave of children hit the entrance to the room and saw the mounds of gifts they stopped dead in their tracks before jumping and shouting with glee. More and more children came tearing through the doors, with older ones helping along their younger comrades, who were still knew to this experience.' The older seasoned pros of this Christmas tradition, all of five years old, came to sit immediately in front of Irina and Sydney in the red chairs next to the tree.

Sydney was astounded by how many kids were coming through the door and how tame they seemed even with their excitement. Irina was right about 'their cute cherubic' faces and Sydney's heart went out to all of them watching as they bubbled with laughter and smiles. Her mother seemed to be glowing with happiness. A team of handlers seemed to wrangle up the few stray two year-olds before they launched themselves into the packages, ready to rip open everything.

When the last of the nurses entered the back of the room carrying the babies, Babushka stood in front of the sea of small faces seated before them on the floor and announced Irina.

A roar of little cheers went up when Irina stood to greet them, speaking so softly and motherly it made Sydney choke up as her heart remembered. This…was the mother she remembered as a child, and here was another example of proof that it hadn't all been a lie.

Irina told them she had a special helper with her today, and introduced Sydney as her daughter.

Sydney suddenly felt very self-conscious with hundreds of little eyes staring her down in wonder. Irina then asked for some helpers to pass out gifts and tons of little arms shot into the air. She randomly picked twenty or so older children who excitedly ran to stand beside her. They were going to pass out all of the gifts first, and then open them at the same time. Irina began calling out the children's names on the list to locate each child and Sydney and Babushka would hand the little helpers the gifts for that child. It suddenly became a game to see how fast they could get the presents to each child as it meant they would get to open theirs that much faster.

When Irina came to the last name on the list, she paused momentarily to look at Sydney with a smile.

"And last but definitely not least, Sydney." She read and Sydney's head whipped to look at her mother in surprise and then to the shy little dark haired girl in the back with her hand raised high. She turned back to Irina with unshed tears, her eyes asking and answering her own questions. "I named her after you." Irina smiled with her own glistening eyes. "She arrived two days before Christmas five years ago, without a name. Oksana gave me the honor of naming her. I chose to name her after you, my own little girl so far away but forever in my heart."

Irina made a 'come here' hand gesture towards the little girl with a smile and the little girl's face lit immediately with joy.

When she was a few feet away, Irina knelt down and the little girl ran into her arms, throwing her own little arms around Irina's neck. Irina scooped her up in a big hug and kissed her cheeks before setting her down.

"Sydney," She addressed the little girl, "This is my daughter Sydney, the one you are named after. Do you remember the stories I told you about my Sydney?" She tucked the little girls hair behind her ear just as she'd done with her own Sydney so many times when she was little.

"The pretty little princess who lived in a far off place. Yes, I remember." The little girl looked nervously up at Sydney, backing up against Irina. "You are very pretty." She finally smiled.

"So are you." Sydney squatted down to her level, "It's a pleasure to meet you." Sydney kissed both of her cheeks in the traditional Russian greeting. "Would you like to sit with me while you open your gifts?"

The little girl nodded eagerly and Irina smiled brightly as Sydney scooped up the child and sat with her in the chair. Irina felt a tugging on her pant leg and looked down to find a crawling baby using her leg to pull himself up to stand.

When he finally accomplished his goal he looked up at her with a big toothy grin, and his chubby hand opening and clenching his fingers in a gesture for her to pick him up.

"Well Hello." Irina smiled and scooped up the little guy, who was obviously taken with her. He immediately rested his head against her shoulder and placed one chubby hand against neck, holding on.

"I guess you've found your helper, Nicolai." Babushka smiled, and kissed the baby boy as she walked by.

Irina laughed when he moved his hand to hold onto her ear instead, with the same big gurgling smile.

_***Russian Dance***_

On her command of, _Go_, the children went wild ripping into their gifts. Mass chaos, was the only phrase that came into Sydney's mind as she looked to her mother and the little boy in her arms, both bursting into enormous smiles at the children's excited shouts of thrill as they'd all received what they'd wanted. Some of the smaller ones were more interested in the massive amounts of paper, boxes and bows as was typical with babies.

Seeing the look of complete and utter joy on each of their little faces, she fully understood why her mother would want to do this in person. Giving gifts, especially to children, was always more fun then receiving them.

Her namesake had become quit comfortable in her lap and was talking rapidly with excitement as she cuddled her new baby doll. The exact same doll she remembered her sneaky mother asking her to pick out the one she would want to have if she were five years old again. Knowing all the while it was intended for the little girl she'd named after Sydney.

No matter how many times she'd seen it, or said it in her head, she still couldn't get over how amazing her mother really was. All of these little things that weren't so little Irina had been doing all these years. Still so much to learn about and from her mother.

Sydney looked over across the room to see Irina being mobbed with tiny leg-huggers in thanks for their presents.

A couple of them, twin boys wearing their new cowboy hats and holsters, had even taken up residence sitting on her feet with their little arms wrapped around her legs and giggling hysterically as she drug them across the floor as she walked, still carrying baby Nicolai. Irina stopped mid-stride when she heard Lena begin to cry, waking up from her afternoon nap.

"I'll get her." Babushka smiled happily as she picked up Lena and snuggled her into her warm, grandmotherly, embrace. "Well hello, Little Beauty." She cradled Lena in her arms once she stopped crying, more interested in the voice of the new stranger holding her.

Irina saw her baby was in good hands and continued the ride for the little cowboys begging her to continue as they drug along their new _Bob the Builder_ dolls.

"She's so good with them." Babushka said to Sydney as she sat next to her in Irina's vacant chair, smiling at all the happy faces around her. "I always knew she must have been a great mother. There was always a certain happiness pained with sadness in her eyes when she spoke of you or interacted with the children. Held them in her arms."

"You knew she had a daughter?" Sydney was a little surprised.

"Yes, of course. She spoke of you briefly, a few times. I had no idea the events surrounding the reasons you weren't with her, only that you were with your father. I could tell it pained her to talk about you, so I never asked why. I assumed it had something to do with the old Soviet ways. So many tragedies from that time. After reading in the news the events and circumstance surrounding your separation, I can see now, why it was so painful. To lose her mother, the husband she loved and her child. She's a much stronger woman then I." The older woman patted Sydney's hand with a small smile. "And today, I don't see that sadness that used to haunt her eyes. Having you back in her life has done away with it; gave her back that missing piece in her heart."

"As she's filled in my own missing piece." Sydney replied softly, watching her mother hugging and tickling every laughing child that came her way, in a game of Snuggle War.

Little Sydney had ran over and joined into the fun as children were coming at Irina from all sides, trying to get as close as they could and then escape before she caught them.

"Every child here envies you," Babushka smiled softly after a minute of watching Irina with the children, "Because she is _your_ mother and you get to go _home_ with her."

Sydney smiled softly, with a hint of sadness remembering her own envy of children with their mothers when she was a motherless child.

Copious amounts of sugar cookies, peppermint ice cream and hot chocolate later, it was time to leave. Irina had given every single child a hug and kiss 'goodbye.'

"Sure, you give them presents, fill with them up with sugar and then you leave us to put them all to bed!" Babushka smiled teasingly to Irina as she hugged them goodbye.

Irina just laughed, remembering how difficult it had been to get Sydney to bed after days like to day as a child. She didn't envy her staff at all for the task ahead.

"Irina, before you go I have some exciting news about our little Sydney. She's found a family." Babushka's eyes started to tear as she saw Irina's startled reaction. "The paper work will be finalized in January and then she will be going home with them."

Irina felt herself getting choked up. Of course she was happy that the child had finally found a real family, but it also meant she was going to have to say goodbye forever. "Where is she going?"

"You are never going to believe. Sydney, Australia." Babushka laughed through her tears. "Like it was meant to be. The couple are wonderful people who just adore Sydney. It is a good home, Irina."

"I'm sure it is." Irina smiled happily through her own tears. "Please let me know when they arrive to take her home. I want to be here to meet them, help them through their court hearing. To say goodbye."

"Of course." Babushka kissed her cheek and then Sydney's and Lena's. "Have a wonderful time to night with your surprise." She smiled at Sydney with a wink to Irina. "Da svidanya."

"What surprise?" Sydney asked curiously once they were inside the limo.

"I have surprise for you." Irina smiled mischievously with that knowing gleam in her eye.

"You're not going to tell me?" When Irina nodded 'no,' with the same smile, "Not even a hint?"

"Something I always wanted to do when you were a child, but ran out of time." Irina ran her hand down the back of Sydney's head, smoothing her hair in a loving gesture.

"Well, that could be a lot of things." Sydney responded quickly then apologized quickly seeing the flash of sadness in Irina's eyes. "Sorry, I didn't mean-"

"Sydney, it's ok. Stop apologizing. We both missed out on a lot and now its time to start filling in those gaps. That's what we're doing tonight." She smiled brightly. "Just you and me."

"What about Lena?" Sydney was surprised to hear her mother was going to trust someone to look after her newborn sister, and how hard it was going to be on Irina to leave her.

"I've found some very trust worthy babysitters who are more then eager to get to spend a few hours with your sister." She smiled brushing her fingers lightly over the back of Lena's cheek.

"What about security?" Sydney asked concerned about possible kidnapping plots out there with Irina's new celebrity and Sloane and Cuvee still out there somewhere.

"Tighter then the NSA." Irina gave her that famous enigmatic grin.

Sydney remembered the last time her mother used that same phrase. When she was about to break into…

"The Kremlin! Who's babysitting? The Putins?" Her eyes were wide.

"Yes, actually. A perfect arrangement. I trust them explicitly and their Presidential presidium is inside the Kremlin, not far from where we'll be." She stopped before revealing her surprise. "Vladimir told me yesterday that Lyudmila and the girls have been itching to see her, spend time with a new baby; so everything works out perfectly. I get some alone time with you, and Lena gets spoiled with attention for a few hours."

Sydney was glowing; alone time with her mother. Not that she didn't love all of them together, or that Lena took so much attention away from Sydney, but the idea of a few hours of Irina all to herself made her ecstatic.

"Well, you're being very mysterious, Mom." Sydney laughed, taking hold of Irina's hand in her lap. "But I am excited to see what you've got planned."


	28. Chapter 28

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy by P. Tchaikovsky, Imagine by John Lennon, All I Want for Christmas by Mariah Carey, Make Someone Happy by Jimmy Durante, Stranger in Moscow by Michael Jackson, Sleep Walk by Santo and Johnny**_

* * *

TWENTY-EIGHT

o

A couple of hours later after getting ready and then dropping Lena off with the Putins, they were walking up the steps of the famous Bolshoi Apollo Theatre.

They both looked spectacularly beautiful: Irina in a silver form fitting sweating and satin skirt and Sydney, in a one-piece silver dress, with fur shawl, that Irina had waiting for her when they arrived back at the apartment.

They checked their coats and as soon as they stepped foot inside the main foyer, Sydney knew exactly what they were about to see, 'The Nutcracker' performed by none other then the beautiful Moscow Ballet.

"Oh Mom," Sydney linked her arm with Irina, gasping with excitement as they made their way to the best seats in the theatre. "You remembered."

When Sydney was two she began ballet lessons to, 'dance like Mommy,' and had always wanted to see _The Nutcracker_ performed by the famous Russian ballerinas.

They were going to go the Christmas Irina had been extracted. And now here they were, in Moscow, in the Bolshoi Apollo Theatre about to watch the most famous ballet in its birthplace.

"Of course." Irina squeezed her hand, leaning her head against Sydney's. "My mother took me when I was a child, and I always wanted to take you. So here we are." She smiled brightly as they took their seats. "I haven't seen _The Nutcracker_ as just a spectator since I was eight. The last time I performed in it, I was sixteen." She couldn't help but giggle at Sydney's eyebrows shooting up in surprise. "I haven't seen it since, so this is exciting for me, too!"

"You danced with the Moscow Ballet?" Sydney said in almost a whisper of awe.

"Yes, for a couple of years." Irina smiled, running her thumb over the back of Sydney's hand in contemplation. "My mother was so disappointed when my life with the KGB took me away from the Theatre Company. She wanted me to be the professional ballerina she was never able to be. Every year at Christmas, before the Revolution, my grandparents would invite the best ballerinas to perform for them in the palace in St. Petersburg. She became obsessed with dancing after watching them. She and her sisters used to run throughout the palaces pretending they were snowflakes or butterflies. She just loved to dance. So did I."

"Do you still dance?" Sydney asked curiously, noting that her mother still walked like a duck, as did she, from their years of doing ballet.

"Yes, of course. I still dance to relax and for strength and flexibility. My ballet training actually helped me to excel in the physical aspects of being a spy. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about."

"Yes, I do. I can't tell you how many times my training in ballet has helped me to escape death."

"Please, don't tell me that." Irina laughed, shaking her head. "I don't want a reminder of just how much danger my little girl has been in, in her life."

"Mom, I'm pretty good at taking care of myself and getting out of the sticky situations I always seem to find myself in." Sydney mockingly admonished her.

"Yes, I know your are, Sydney. You are excellent at what you do. I've never said otherwise, in fact I would have loved working with you. Working with you now is wonderful. But as your mother, it's ingrained in my very being to be worried and concerned about the dangerous aspect."

"I would have loved working with you, too." Sydney smiled at the thought of kicking ass side by side with her Mom and Irina's motherly instincts to worry about her. "But, we are working together now."

"Right." Irina picked up Sydney's hand and brought it to her lips with a kiss. "You watch my back."

"And I'll watch yours." Sydney grinned about the idea of having her mother as a field partner, remembering India and despite the danger it was fun to spend time with her.

Just then the lights dimmed and the orchestra began to play, an immediate hush fell upon the audience as the first dancers made their way onto the stage.

"Mom," Sydney whispered with a curious smile, "I forgot to ask. What part did you play?" She smiled her big dimple smile remembering Irina asking her the same question about her Thanksgiving Day play.

"The Sugar Plum Fairy." Irina whispered back with that enchanting look in her eyes.

_***Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy***_

"Of course you were." Sydney giggled, shaking her head adding under her breath, "Of course! Who else would you be but the beautiful Sugar Plum Fairy, ruler of Sugar Plum Kingdom? So appropriate!"

It didn't matter that Sydney wasn't a little girl anymore, she was in just as much awe as she would have been then, watching the beautiful dancers and costumes tell one of her favorite Christmas tales.

Every now and then she'd glance at her mother who was enjoying it just as much. Irina in turn, was sneaking glances at Sydney and watching her reactions.

Irina saw the six year old little girl in Sydney that she'd remembered so well and sharing this experience with her, was fulfilling one of her own dreams. She couldn't get enough of Sydney's smile or cute laugh that seemed to bubble up out of nowhere.

When Irina's former part came on, Sydney could just see her mother up there, sixteen years old the graceful beauty and envy of all little girls.

* * *

When it was over and they were leaving, word had gotten around that, 'the Romanov' and her daughter were in attendance of tonight's performance. As soon as Irina and Sydney appeared at the top of the grand staircase a mass of flashes went off in their faces. The Press, mostly foreign, had been waiting for just such an opportunity to catch her in Russia.

Soon, the others in attendance realized who she was and why the Press was taking her pictures and all stopped to smile, some clapping and smiling at both she and Sydney as they made their way gracefully down the steps.

There was no point in trying to hide or out run them; that would only encourage them.

Irina smiled brilliantly and nodded her thanks when she passed someone clapping for her. Sydney could tell her mother was nervous by all this attention but was handling it just as she had everything else in her life, extremely calm and with grace.

Question after question was being flung at her and time after time it was the same question just rephrased in hopes she'd be fooled and answer. All questions were dealing with her involvement with the government, espionage, her life with Jack and the people's hopes of bringing back the monarchy with her as the official ruler and if she would accept that responsibility.

Irina only answered one question just as she and Sydney were about to leave the Theatre, 'What are you doing in Moscow this evening?'

The question seemed so ridiculous to both Sydney and Irina as it was pretty obvious what they were doing; they'd gone to the ballet.

"I'm spending some quality time with daughter, by enjoying my favorite ballet. And if you don't mind, I'd like to continue on with our evening. Da svidanya." Irina replied smoothly, flashing her brilliant smile as she wave 'goodbye' to everyone.

Everyone seemed mesmerized by her and the photographers, happy with the photos they'd already gotten, did as her hidden message implied and left them alone.

"You're a natural at that, Mom." Sydney laughed her funny giggle as they made their way across the Square to the restaurant they would be dining in this evening.

Irina had basically told the press in her enchanting way to 'back off' and they did, so completely mesmerized by her tone and voice.

"Well, I've realized it's futile to try to run from them now. They know almost everything. I told Vladimir to go ahead and release the facts and some photos, hoping they will get what they want and stop stalking me." She laughed, linking her arm with Sydney's. "And apparently, as long as I sit still long enough for them to get a few pictures and say 'something,' they're content. You, I thought, handled it very well."

"I guess I'm fairly good at remaining calm under pressure, sort of a necessity in our line of work." She laughed again making Irina laugh.

Irina stopped them by tugging back on Sydney's arm to stare at the beauty of St. Basil's Cathedral before them. She inhaled the cold air deeply then laughed shaking her head as she began to walk slowly remembering another time, in the same place.

"What's so funny?" Sydney was interested by Irina's sudden behavior and obvious amusement at something she wasn't privy to.

"I was just thinking about when I was little, six or so I think, I would stop by here after school." She paused trying hard not to laugh as she shook her head. "Katya and I wanted candy but we really didn't have enough money for it and our parents wouldn't buy it for us except on special occasions. So, one day, I got an idea."

"Oh no," Sydney giggled, "You got an idea… Why do I have a feeling you're about to tell me of something illegal you did that kicked off your future career?"

Irina nudged her smiling with her own giggle as they walked along, her daughter was so perceptive, "So I got an idea," She started again, laughing, "The Red Square was packed with tourists starting in the spring and all summer long. One day I'd sat watching all the tourists in front of St. Basil's and decided to make my move, and that's when I began my summer of pick-pocketing." She tried not laughing as Sydney looked at the cathedral in front of her and then to her mother and burst out laughing hysterically imagining her mother all of six years old beginning her career as a thief, and for candy.

"Katya and I ate a lot of candy that summer and my mother never knew. She couldn't figure out why I'd want to spend so much time at church but if she ever knew, she didn't say anything. We spent almost everyday there during that one summer and she only let us go because I managed to bribe Mikhail, who was older, into coming with us if I bought him some candy too. I can't believe I just confessed that."

"So you're career of stealing and bribery started when you were six." Sydney couldn't stop giggling. "Did you ever get caught?"

"Once, and I just started bawling hysterically and the man felt so badly, he ended up buying me candy to calm me down! So I still got what I wanted!" She kept laughing as they walked.

"Well, I have a confession to make too, if you're spilling your secrets, I better spill mine. It's been eating at me for all these years, I felt so badly about it." Sydney calmed down a little and tried to be serious though it was difficult in this laughing mood.

"Sydney, what did you do?" Irina asked bright eyed and curious.

"Well, apparently you passed on your trait of thievery to me, obviously as we're both spies but also because I, too stole for the first time when I was six for the same reason." Sydney shrugged mischievously before laughing again at her mother's reaction.

"What? When?" Irina was wracking her brain trying to remember anything from that time that might give her a clue, or perhaps it was after she 'died.'

"I was with you actually," Sydney started laughing again, "Do you remember when you took me with you to your doctor's appointment? The last one right before your extraction?" Sydney smiled softly, pulling Irina's arm in closer to her.

"Yes." Irina replied softly, thinking back to that appointment. It was the first time she had heard their baby's heartbeat, the baby she lost when she arrived at Kashmir. "I remember."

"Where did you go just now?" Sydney had seen the sudden change in Irina's eyes even if her mask of perfection was firmly in place now.

"I was just thinking about that appointment." Irina smiled softly at Sydney then turned her vision to straight ahead.

"It was about the baby, wasn't it?" Sydney suddenly remembered that her mother had just found out she was pregnant before her extraction with the baby she watched Cuvee beat out of her.

"Yes." Irina admitted in almost a whisper.

"I'm sorry." Sydney felt terrible for bringing up what must be a very painful memory.

"No, don't be silly. You have nothing to be sorry for. It was a good day." She smiled and pulled Sydney in closer to her. "Go on with your story. I want to hear what my little 'thief' was apparently up to." She laughed and Sydney felt the ease come back into the conversation and was amazed by how quickly her mother could recover.

"Well…while you went into see the doctor, my fingers started itching looking at the box of Lions Mints on the table they were selling for charity a quarter a piece. Do you remember? I'd asked you if I couldn't 'pretty please have one' and you said, 'No,' I'd already had enough sweets for the day. I was so upset, remember?"

"Yes, I remember." Irina began laughing thinking about Sydney's pouting face that wasn't much different then the one she sometimes wore as grown up. "You little sneak, you stole the mints?"

"Yep, I sure did. I stole the roll, casually pretended to 'look' at it then dropped it into my pocket on my overalls." She started giggling remembering her first 'espionage' mission.

Irina was smiling from ear to ear, her body shaking as she laughed with Sydney.

"I remember now that you smelled 'very minty' when you came in for dinner that night…and you told me it was because you'd-"

"Just brushed my teeth." Sydney said in unison with Irina, laughing.

"I ran straight to my fort outside when we got home and ate the whole roll."

"I knew you were up to something out there!" Irina's eyes lit up shaking her head, still laughing.

"It was also my first day of lying out-right to you. God, I felt so terrible for stealing first of all but mostly for lying to you. I didn't want you to be disappointed in me. I cried and cried that night, I felt so bad. When you died a few days later, I thought for sure it was God's way of punishing me for stealing from the charity box and then lying to you." She added softly, feeling a sudden wave of sadness. "I cried myself to sleep forever about it until I finally broke down and told my nanny I thought you died because I was bad. She tried convincing me otherwise but it wasn't until I was older that I knew it wasn't because of what I'd done."

"Oh, Sweetheart, no." Irina's eyes filled with tears instantly thinking about her little girl crying herself to sleep thinking she was somehow responsible for her mother's 'death.' Irina made Sydney stop walking and flung her arms around her neck, hugging her tightly, and then peppering her head and cheeks with kisses like she did when Sydney was little and upset. "I'm so sorry, Sydney."

"Mom, its okay. It was along time ago and it wasn't your fault I stole candy and lied to you, burdening my own conscience." Sydney hugged her back then offered a smile.

"Sydney, you were only six years old. Your conscience shouldn't have been burdened by anything! If anyone's conscience deserved to be burdened for stealing and lying, it was mine. Not yours." Irina ran her hand down the side of Sydney's head, making sure she was looking her in the eyes. "And of course I could never be disappointed in you, especially for that! Not when I stole money to buy candy at the same age!" She laughed trying to lighten the sudden somber mood. Her mind was still thinking about how her life with the KGB and especially her assignment, had caused so many hurts in so many lives. The KGB controlled everything about her life, and apparently, even her little girls guilt at believing she had a part in making her die when the KGB extracted her.

If she just could have stayed, if even for only a week longer maybe Sydney would have come to her and told her what she'd done, let go of that burden and she would have told her she loved her no matter what and then maybe…maybe she wouldn't have thought she had a part in her mother's demise for the remainder of her childhood over something as small and insignificant as mints and a lie about brushing her teeth.

"Well, I feel so much better finally confessing that to you," Sydney broke into a smile and laughed softly, "Of all the things I've stolen and lied about in my line of work, its those damn mints that bothered me the most."

"I love you." Irina giggled, kissing her cheek quick, linking their arms as they began walking again. "You're so funny."

"Mom," Sydney looked over at Irina after a few moments of silence, "Thank You, for taking me with you today to the orphanage, and tonight to the ballet. The kids and their faces," She smiled brightly, "And the beautiful dancers, I will never forget it."

"Neither, will I, Sydney. Neither, will I." Irina returned the smile, "And thank you for sharing it with me."

* * *

Jack stumbled through the door of their home for the first time in days, his arms full of luggage, piles of mail and his briefcase. Kendall had finally ordered him to go home just after noon as he was staring off into space and the apparent bags under his eyes meant he hadn't slept in awhile.

In truth, Jack was happy to leave after gossip spread quickly through the Ops center of 'a major fight with Irina in Jakarta,' and he was receiving a mixed chorus of sympathetic and stern looks.

He dropped his bags onto the couch, his briefcase on the dining room table and the mail on the kitchen counter as he made his way to the refrigerator to get something to eat. He flung open the doors and his eyes fell upon Irina's insulin; he wondered briefly if she'd had enough vials with her? Before shaking his head, grabbing the milk and closing the door. She can take care of herself. Jack reminded himself as he stood looking at the picture of Irina and Lena on the refrigerator door. He missed them and he finally allowed himself to admit that.

After being away from them for only a few days, he missed them.

Everywhere he walked around the house, there were reminders. Lena's bouncy seat still sitting in front of the Christmas tree, her tiny socks in the laundry Irina had folded, waiting to be put away on their bed, the smell of Irina's shampoo and lotion still lingering in the bathroom and on her robe, her shawl lying over the arm of the chair in front of the fire place.

It was maddening to Jack, especially when his mind would flash back to 'similar findings' of her things after he thought she died. After he showered, he tried to lie down and take a nap but found himself staring at the empty space beside him where Irina was supposed to be. He tried reading his book but gave up after reading the same page four times. He went into the living room and stood staring at the Christmas tree for, only God knows how long; his thoughts with his girls on the other side of the world. The house looked amazing, all decked out for Christmas and there he was, alone, again.

Shaking himself out his despairing state, he trudged back into the kitchen to start going through the mail, flipping bill after bill, junk mail after junk mail until he stopped, frozen staring at his and Irina's faces on the cover of _Newsweek_.

The cover read, 'Love in the Cold War: Falling for the Enemy,' the caption in the corner, '1972- The unsuspecting Jack, 21, a CIA Agent fell hard for 'Laura' the alias of Irina, 17, a KGB Spy who fell for her 'mark.'

"Seventeen…" Jack whispered to himself staring at the photos and shaking his head in disbelief. He hadn't seen these photos in many years.

They were both so young, and so in love those photos. He wondered if Irina had really been in love with him then, those photos had been taken early in their relationship. In his heart, in his memories, he believed she was but he didn't know for sure.

Jack couldn't help but smile staring at her picture in the bottom left of the magazine. Both of the pictures on the bottom had been taken on their trip to Australia the year they got engaged. He could still see her on the beach that morning, her hair blowing in the wind, big smile on her face and her infectious laugh as she tackled him into the sand just moments after he took the photo.

The photo of him, she'd taken in their hotel while Jack was teasing the maid about 'not disturbing them' in his best Aussie accent. Looking at the photo, he decided he was a lot more fun then.

The top photos he recognized from their first year in LA. Irina's, from UCLA's press archives when she accepted the teaching position and his was a photo to supplement his cover story as a 'new employee' at Jennings Aero-Space. Now the world knew he didn't sell airplane parts and was actually in the CIA. His undercover work was finished for certain now and surprisingly, he wasn't that upset by it. He walked slowly up the steps, flipping through the pages of the articles covering the timeline of events in his own life and Irina's, some things he'd realized, reading about she and her mother, he hadn't known.

He sat on the edge of his bed, staring for several moments Irina's picture and the pictures of them together and he couldn't stand how much he missed her. An hour was even too long after twenty years apart. He thought to himself. He missed her so much that it physically hurt, he had to stop torturing himself.

They'd already survived so much; he could make it for another couple of days. He threw the magazine on the bed and decided to keep himself busy. He picked up the stack of laundry and began putting his and Irina's clothes away before moving into the nursery to put away Lena's things.

When he'd hung the last tiny outfit and shut the closet door he stopped to look around the room. It was a perfect nursery, he thought, all that is missing is the baby.

Jack walked over to the crib and wound the mobile.

_***Imagine***_

The lullaby was John Lennon's 'Imagine' and he stood there a moment, watching as the tiny plush animals circled above the empty space. He sat in the rocker and flipped through one of the well-worn books of nursery rhymes he remembered reading to Sydney. He picked up the photo of Lena and Irina on the tiny nightstand. They were in the same rocker, in the same position as the photo he'd taken of 'Laura' and Sydney so many years before. He wanted nothing more then to reach into the photo and hold them both, kiss them and never let them go.

'Everything in this house is sheer torture!' Jack sighed and set the photo down. "This is absurd!" He stood rapidly flying into his room, throwing his dirty clothes out of his luggage and flinging fresh clothes in.

_***All I Want For Christmas***_

"What am I doing here? Sitting here by myself, alone? I've done enough of that! I want my wife; I want my daughters. I'll apologize, I'll listen, I'll tell her what she deserves to hear and hopefully, she'll forgive the jackass that I am and I'll be holding both of them tomorrow morning!" He was talking to himself, scolding more like it. "I'm not losing her again over my own stupidity. She loves you! _She loves you_! You know that! She didn't want to leave you; she was forced to leave you! Her own mother was killed because she loved you! She was tortured and put in prison because she loved you! God, Jack you're an ass!" He rambled on as he flew down the stairs and out the door, "Great! Now I'm going crazy, talking to myself and using third person!" He sped his car down the freeway towards LAX, hoping to be on the next flight to Russia.

Jack was zigging and zagging through traffic, blasting his horn at the idiotic drivers doing last minute Christmas shopping, and driving along like they had all the time in the world.

"Marshall!" He boomed into his cell phone as he tore off onto a side street in an attempt to get around an accident that California drivers had to stop and gawk at, slowing traffic to a crawl.

"Um Yes, Mr. Bristow... wha- what do you need?" Marshall fumbled with the phone almost dropping it when he first answered and Jack yelled in his ear.

"When is the next flight leaving for Moscow from LAX?" He yelled again, in his stern tone that was 'Jack Bristow.'

"Wha-wha-why do you need that, Mr. Bristow? Aren't we leaving for St. Petersburg on the 23rd?"

"Marshall!" Jack yelled flustered, as he had to slam on his breaks for a red light.

"Yes!" Marshall yelled back. "What do you need?"

"Don't ask questions! I'm leaving now; you're still coming on the 23rd! All I need right now is to get to Moscow!" He floored it through the green with angry scowl on his face.

"Is this because you made an ass-" He realized what Jack was doing, and then caught himself, "I mean oh boy, Weiss just said that in Jakarta well…you weren't exactly kind and well, Irina was upset and are you going to apologize? Say have you seen the news lately? Nice photos, Mr. Bristow…quite the handsome young man." Marshall smiled on the other side of the phone line as he typed furiously hacking into the airlines flight schedules. "I just read the one in _Newsweek_, 'Love in the Cold War: Falling for the Enemy' such a great title…and love story I think you two are the modern Romeo and Juliet, well except for that whole killing yourself for love thing…but wait a minute I guess, it is true because Laura, I mean Irina, your wife…she pretended to kill herself for love so that-"

"Marshall! Back on task!" Jack rolled his eyes with a big sigh as he tore into extended parking at LAX.

"Yes, of course, I'm sorry…its just sometimes I ramble when I'm happy and you flying off to your love is just romantic, thinking I'm getting a little misty eyed."

Jack could hear Marshall sniffling on the other end.

"There's a flight leaving in fifteen minutes Gate 46 with a connection in Paris! One seat left!"

"Fine. Great. Thank you Marshall." Jack tried not to run hearing the boarding call for the flight already, but gave up trying to look calm and rational and budged to the front of the line.

"Go get her, Mr. Bristow!" Marshall smiled, punching his fist into the air as the call ended.

"I need to be on that flight, the one leaving out of Gate 46 to Moscow." Jack commanded to the woman behind the counter who was glaring at him.

_***Make Someone Happy***_

"Sir, do you not see the line behind you?" She pointed sarcastically with her finger.

"Yes, I see the line. I don't have time for lines and I don't have time for you to pull a power trip." Her eyebrows shot up as he continued. "Now, if you'd please I know there is one more seat available and I need to be on that flight!"

"I don't appreciate your tone, sir. Being nasty isn't going to win you any favors!" She spat at him causing a chuckle from the woman working next to her. "Besides that flight is full."

"I need to be on that flight!" Jack's voice started rising as his tone remained deathly calm.

"The flight is full, sir! You'll have to wait for the next flight!"

"Well, when does that leave?" Jack huffed.

"In 45 minutes." She scanned her screen, and Jack calmed down a little. "Nope, wait sorry that's full, too… There's another one, no that's full, too."

Jack felt the steam rising and about to blow.

"Listen, I need to be a flight leaving today! I need to get to Moscow, now! My wife is waiting for me! I don't care what you have to do, get me a seat!"

"Sir, it is Christmas in case you haven't noticed and the flights are full! You should have booked your ticket months ago!" She yelled back at him.

"I did! I'm supposed to be leaving on the 23rd but I need to leave now! Can't you just change my ticket?" Jack was already impatient hearing the boarding call start for the next flight.

"It doesn't work that way, sir. If there is an open seat, then yes, we can change your ticket but everyone has already checked in. There is a flight leaving tomorrow morning at 11:00 a.m. that I can book you on?"

"No, I have to leave now!" Jack whipped out his badge and added in a low, ice calm tone, "Don't make me use this."

The woman was a bit taken back and then turned red with anger, "I will not be bullied by someone who tries to abuse their power just because they have a badge! Now," She smoothed the front of her uniform, "I can put you on stand-bye and if a seat opens up, I'll call your name. Take a seat!" She commanded pointing with her finger to the waiting area near the gate.

Jack grumbled as he picked up his bag and sat heavily on the plastic blue chair.

An older man was sleeping in the chair beside him, with his mouth open, and his head tilted back. Jack glanced down at the ticket in the man's hand and noticed that the man was on the flight boarding now, to Moscow and got an idea. He reached casually into his bag and pulled out a small vile of the sleeping drug that Marshall had concocted for use on missions. A spies bag was always full of interesting things just as a grandmother's who always seemed to have everything but the kitchen sink.

Ever so carefully, he let a small drop fall onto the man's hand. He slipped the vile back into his luggage with a smile. He let a minute go by before nudging the man, who almost fell over, he was so knocked out. Jack pulled his arm so he was upright again, and waited for his name to be called.

"Ivan Moscowitz, please come to Gate 46, the plane is boarded. Ivan Moscowitz, please come immediately to Gate 46." The voice on the load speaker said.

Jack glanced over at the man's ticket again, 'Ivan Moscowitz.' He smiled to himself, waiting.

"Stand-bye passengers for flight 7644 bound for Moscow via Paris please come to the podium. Stand-bye passengers for flight 7644." The woman repeated.

Jack smiled and picked up his bag, whispering to the sleeping man.

"Thanks Ivan, you'll catch the next one."

"Well, aren't you lucky." The woman gave him a smug smile as she gave Jack his boarding pass. "Have a nice flight," She looked down at his ticket to read the name, "Mr. Bristow..." Her eyes suddenly fleeting up to his, with her mouth open, recognizing the name from the news, and then the badge, the fact he was going to Russia to see his wife, it all clicked. She broke into a real smile.

"Thanks, I'll try." Jack quickly took his ticket and headed toward the plane.

He wasn't too happy with Ivan's seat, way in the back of the plane, middle row, middle seat between two older couples. One French and the other Russian, Jack was between the two women.

As soon as he sat down, and wedged himself in trying to get comfortable, the women began whispering to their husbands in their native languages.

Jack was trying not to eavesdrop but it was obvious that he was the object of their 'secrets.' And then the French woman, with a big smile, dug into a purse Jack thought looked more like a small suitcase and pulled out two magazines, showing them to him with a sneaky grin.

"You?" She asked, trying to confirm her suspicions that he was indeed the 'one.'

The first was the _Newsweek_ he'd already seen at his house, the second was _TIME_ magazine, titled Special Report: 'The Romanov' with picture of Irina looking dangerous and sexy on the cover.

"Dis is you? No?" She asked in her high-pitched French accented voice, smiling like crazy. "Your wife, no? She is very beautiful!"

Jack nodded discreetly trying not to draw any further attention as a slow hum voices in the seats around them began with people craning their necks to see him.

As soon as he nodded that he was Jack Bristow and 'the Romanov' was his wife, the Russian woman squealed with delight and pulled out her own magazine, flashing it into his face.

Another _TIME_ magazine Special Report with Irina on the cover, this one called her, 'Mother Russia' and had a picture with her gorgeous smile, same articles, just different covers. Future collector's items, no doubt.

_What the hell is going on?_ Jack thought to himself looking at his life and that of Irina's suddenly the biggest news in the world and hottest topic of discussion. He knew that Irina had discussed with her government releasing information and photographs to suffice until she could hold a press conference but he hadn't really thought about how much press coverage their lives would be getting. He then shook his head at what a stupid thought that was.

His wife had been revealed as the daughter of Anastasia Romanov, and ruling force behind Russia, not to mention the added appeal of her life of espionage and a family with an American who was her 'mark' when she was in the KGB. Photographers had been staking out his home for weeks; he'd just been trying to be oblivious to all the press coverage.

This was going to be a long flight, Jack knew, and when the flight attendant came by with the drink cart he asked for a vodka-on the rocks. Mid-flight and a few drinks later, his new 'friends' in the seats next to him had fallen asleep.

Jack carefully tugged the _TIME_ magazine out of the Russian woman's grasp as she was more then likely passed out, from all the vodka she'd been drinking to celebrate sitting next to Jack, the 'love of the Romanov,' she kept toasting.

Most of the planes occupants were sleeping or watching the in-flight movie, 'It's a Wonderful Life,' so Jack flipped open the cover and began reading, curious to see what _TIME_ had to say about his wife.

When the flight attendant who'd originally given him a hard time at the check in counter came around again with the drink cart, she saw what Jack was reading and gave him a small smile with a wink when he tried to hide the magazine by adjusting his pillow.

"Would you like another drink, Mr. Bristow?" She whispered as to not wake the others.

"Yes." He replied sharply then offered a small smile of apology for being somewhat of an ass earlier. "Thank you. About early-"

"I understand why you were anxious about getting on this flight now. If I had known that you were trying to get home to her," She nodded towards the picture of Irina on the French woman's magazine with a smile, "I would have found a way to get you on this flight… even if it was booked." She smiled again.

"I thought you said you don't like people abusing their authority?" Jack looked at her in his calm demeanor with a hint of a smile.

"Well, we do take in special considerations. And I think your situation would be considered special." She smiled again. "But next time, I do suggest you work on your people skills." She laughed slightly, teasing him.

"Perhaps, you're right." Jack nodded his thanks as he took his drink.

"Get some sleep, Mr. Bristow. It's a long flight and I'm sure you'll want to be rested when you find your wife." She winked again in a way Jack couldn't tell if she was flirting with him or if that was her subtle hint at a sexual innuendo.

* * *

Irina awoke with a start, sitting straight up in bed after having a nightmare. Her breathing heavy and uneven her heart racing, and damp with sweat. It was the first in more then a week since talking to Jack and Sydney about what happened in Kashmir. This was a different kind of nightmare then those.

It began with witnessing her mother's execution and she could never get to her in time and then went to Kashmir and she was actually giving birth to the baby she lost, her child with Jack and as soon as she heard him cry and held him in her arms, Cuvee came and took him away, and she was stuck in her cell screaming for the baby.

Then she heard Sydney crying and when she walked down the hall to Sydney's bedroom she saw her six year old little girl crying in the corner, looking horrified when Irina tried to go comfort her, screaming, 'You're dead! You're dead! I killed you! You're not real! You're dead!' And that's when she woke herself up, not being able to stand seeing her child in pain caused by her.

Irina looked over to the other side of the bed where Sydney was still asleep, having opted to sleep with Irina again in her bed rather then use the bed in the spare room. Lena was sleeping peacefully between them.

Irina looked at the clock, it was a little after 6:00 a.m. and Lena would be waking soon to eat. She gently scooped her up and padded into the living room to feed the baby that was now stirring in her sleep.

When she finished she lay the baby carefully into her Moses basket and set it on her side of the bed, next to Sydney. She wrote a note quickly, explaining that she was going for a run and would be back soon with breakfast. She smiled as she signed, 'Love, Mom' for the first time on note in twenty-two years. She pulled her hair into a ponytail, put on her running clothes especially for cold weather and pulled her headband down over her ears to keep them warm. She checked one last time on the baby and then dropped a light kiss to Sydney's head before making her silent exit.

_***Stranger In Moscow***_

Thankfully, the street crew had already been by this morning and Irina was able to run on freshly snow blown streets and side walks. The sun hadn't even risen yet, though you could see the light on the horizon turning into the dark and light purple, the tell tale sign it was about to. She zipped up her Vortex vest, covering her exposed neck from the stinging cold. Her breath was as instant cloud as it hit the freezing air and seemed to catch the snowflakes falling from the sky. She started down an old familiar path that would lead her around the entire Square, past St. Basils, past the Kremlin and Lenin's tomb, past the former KGB headquarters, through the park and back again making a full circle.

Irina's head was running rampant with so many thoughts and memories of the past and the present. Her mind kept flashing back to Sydney telling her how she'd thought for years as a little girl that she had something to do with her mother's death because she stole candy and lied.

The thought made Irina want to cry and she had to blink back tears as her feet hit the ground. The KGB had such control over her life back then. They never let her family be who they were. They took their name, their power and their fortune and then after all Irina's family had done to comply, it was never enough.

She was finally able to feel a sense of freedom when she was in America, even though she was living under false pretenses giving them bits of information, her life was her own. At least until they wanted her to return and with her refusal they'd killed her mother, taken her away from her family and then killed her baby. They'd even taken what was left of her soul at one point. She'd given them all she had, done everything they asked and still they wanted more.

When she first returned to Moscow after eleven years in her American life, she felt as though she didn't belong anymore. That somehow Russia had become the 'foreign' place to her and she wanted to go 'home' to America. She would walk around listening to the Russian being spoken around her and find herself thinking in English. She felt so alone and cold inside standing in the Square back then, watching the people of 'her' homeland.

As Irina ran past the monuments and buildings that held so much history, hers' and her countries she thought about those times under the Communist rule, her life in America and how she'd spent the last twenty years of her life changing it all. She'd taken back her life and found her family.

Her family, she repeated in her head with a small smile. Finding them again made it all worth it. She thought about her mother, and her final words, the same words she'd passed on to Sydney and Vaughn. Her own mother had died because, no not because, Irina corrected her line of thinking; she died for Irina's love of Jack and her family' and Irina wasn't going to let her mother's death be for nothing. She was going to follow her own advice and hold on to it with all she had. She missed Jack. Even with all the mean and hurtful things he'd said, she still missed him. They had a lot to talk about when he arrived for Christmas.

Now that Sydney was leaving today, time was going to crawl by. Allowing her thoughts to wandering once again to Jack and everything they'd been through in their relationship up to this point. She knew she would go crazy if she didn't have something, someone, to occupy her until her family joined her in St. Petersburg. And suddenly, she had an idea. She smiled brightly with new determination as she ran faster towards home.

The baker gave her fresh cinnamon rolls, 'on the house your Highness,' he'd said with an enormous smile.

Whenever Irina was in Moscow she would always stop by this bakery to get her breakfast after her run and once her identity had been revealed as 'the Romanov,' the baker had hung her photo from a magazine behind his counter with pride, a small sign above said, 'Proud to serve the Tsar.'

When he'd pointed it out to Irina, she suddenly felt incredibly shy but thanked him warmly for his gift and kindness before running across the street home. Her already bizarre life had gotten more insane she realized, when even the bellman in the elevator told her to, 'have a wonderful day, Empress.'

When she finally reached her place, Sydney and Lena were both still asleep and she had to laugh at the way they were both sleep; she found her camera, turning off the flash and used the streaming sunshine to take their picture. 'Her girls.' She smiled at the thought. Both girls were on their backs, right arm up against their head, left straight down at their side, both had wild hair. She saw the scent of the fresh cinnamon rolls arousing Sydney's senses when she began to stir and quietly crept over to her and lay her upper body over Sydney's, pressing her cold cheek to Sydney's.

"Ah…you're freezing!" Sydney suddenly came fully alert, but Irina remained where she was laughing. "What have you been doing?" She threw her arm over Irina's back, holding her there in the strange hug that was theirs' for these moments.

"I went for a run, Sleepy Head." She kissed Sydney's cheek with her cold lips and laughed when she felt Sydney shiver beneath her.

"Are you insane? Don't answer that." Sydney said shaking her head in continued wander when Irina laughed. "You do realize it's the middle of winter and we're in Russia?"

"Yes, of course." Irina pulled away from her grasp, "It's not that bad actually, once you get your blood pumping." She smiled.

"Are you sure that's healthy for you? I mean with your lungs and heart, isn't going from the extreme heat to the freezing cold going to harm your healing process?" Sydney snuck a peek at her sister before wrapping the comforter around her shoulders.

"I don't know, I never thought about it. But I feel fine." Irina's brows scrunched and then smiled as she made her way towards the kitchen, Sydney on her heels. "I got us some rolls for breakfast. They are from my favorite bakery here in Moscow."

"What time is it anyway?" Sydney asked before taking a bit bite of her gooey roll. "Mmm, these are good." She smiled with her mouth full.

"It's almost 8:30 am. What time is your flight?" Irina poured them both a cup of tea.

"Noon." Sydney smiled sheepishly, "I'm sort of torn."

"What do you mean?" Irina asked taking the chair next to her at the table.

"Well, I'm torn because I really want to see Vaughn, but I also don't want to leave you. I'm having so much fun."

"Sydney, I'm having fun with you, too! But you'd be crazy to pass up Paris with the man you love to stay in Moscow with your mother!" She laughed. "I promise, our fun will continue when you both fly to St. Petersburg on the 24th, ok?" She patted her hand.

"I know." Sydney giggled, "But really, Mom, this has been so amazing for me. Spending this time with you. Getting to know about your life, and mine. Our life when I was little. I love this and I'm going to miss you."

"As do I." Irina returned the smile, "And I'm going to miss you, too. Oh, Sydney," her eyes suddenly went wide, "I almost forgot. I was wondering if you wouldn't mind stopping by my club in Paris, there is something in my office I'd like you to bring back for me. If you wouldn't mind? I don't trust the mail enough to ship it."

"No, of course I'll do it, but what is it?" Sydney's interest was peaked.

"Something very special, you'll see." She smiled her famous enigmatic grin, with dark eyes of mystery.

"It's not illegal is it?" Sydney scrunched her eyebrows as she took another roll, teasing her mother with a smile.

"No! It's not illegal. I promise." Irina laughed and shook her head. "And I have something for you to give to Michael, and Bella." She added softly with a smile.

* * *

_***Sleep Walk***_

"Oh my god," Sydney gasped as she passed by the Café Aloha in the airport on her way to grab taxi after landing in Paris. "Dad?" She came up behind the man at the bar with several empty glasses in front of him, a bowl of peanut shells and twisting a paper umbrella in his fingers looking rather disheveled and depressed.

"Sydney?" Jack suddenly became aware of her presence, both asking simultaneously,

"What are you doing here?" Staring at each other in shock.

"I got on an earlier flight to surprise Vaughn. What are you doing here? In Paris? You're not here to spy on us are you?" She asked only half-jokingly knowing her father all to well.

"No, I'm not here to spy on you. I actually forgot you were flying in here today. I am on my way to Moscow but I'm flying stand-bye and my damn seat was bumped. So, I've been sitting here for the last four hours." He tossed the umbrella into an empty glass.

"You're on your way to Moscow?" Sydney suddenly perked up, and sat on a stool next to Jack. "Why?" She asked already knowing the reason. Her mother. Just looking at the man you could tell he was miserable.

"Well, I'm on my way to surprise your mother if God and aviation would stop conspiring against me." He raised his hands in the air, pointing towards the sky. "I've finally gotten on a flight that's leaving in an hour."

Sydney's face was glowing with her enormous smile and then fell. "Dad, you're flying to Moscow?"

"Yes, why do you have that look on your face?" Jack sat up a little straighter.

"Mom's not in Moscow, Dad. She left for St. Petersburg the same time I left for Paris." She bit her lip nervously, seeing his sudden defeat and frustration.

"Well, goddamnit!" He slammed his hand on the bar and then rubbed his temple. "I'm going to Moscow!"

"I know I'm sorry. You should have called or something Dad, mom would've have waited or at least you could have flown directly into St. Petersburg."

"It was going to be a surprise, Sydney and it wasn't supposed to take me this damn long to get here! I should have been in Moscow a long time ago if not for this damn holiday and aviation!"

"Now, Dad," Sydney was trying hard not to laugh, as she straightened his tie and smoothed out his ruffled sleepy-hair, "Don't be the Grinch of Christmas. You'll get there. Now stop drinking and stop brooding or you won't be in any better shape then the last time you saw mom." She gave him a stern look with those, 'damned arch eyebrows of her Mothers,' Jack thought, knowing she was right. "Alcohol wasn't your friend then, and it isn't now so consider yourself cut off. Now, why don't you go see if you can't change your ticket to St. Petersburg instead? Ok?"

Jack nodded as Sydney leaned over and kissed his cheek, getting up to leave.

"I have to get going if I'm going to surprise Vaughn. Have a safe flight." She smiled, and walked away before turning around, "And Dad, mom misses you, too." Her smile grew as she turned around again, loving the surprised look on her father's face.


	29. Chapter 29

_**AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat of course): La noyee **_**from**_** Amelie Soundtrack**__**, A Time for Us by Nino Rota from the Romeo & Juliet Soundtrack (piano version: you can find a lovely perfect version- on Youtube by Modela45 for FREE!)**__**, **__**Lovesong by Adele**__**, Fade Into You **_**by Mazzy Star**

* * *

TWENTY-NINE

o

_***La noyee ***_

When Sydney stepped outside, the sun had already set for the evening as the winter sun always does and she smiled warmly at being in Paris, none mission related.

She found a taxi and delivered the address Vaughn had given her in flawless French, watching the spectacular city fly by outside her window as the driver maneuvered the streets with ease.

She couldn't wait to see Vaughn, surprising him with her early arrival was sure to bring a smile to his lips as she greeted him with a kiss. Meeting his mother was both terrifying and exhilarating after all this time.

When the driver pulled up in front of the beautiful home was in awe, it was perfect. She retrieved her luggage, thanked the driver and let out a big sigh as she walked up the front walkway and then the steps, ringing the bell.

She heard a woman's voice on the other side saying to someone in French, "I'll get it!"

The door suddenly opened and a incredibly beautiful blonde woman stood before Sydney, smiling radiantly as soon as she saw Sydney.

"Michael!" She called behind her, still looking at Sydney, "I believe your Sydney has arrived!" She smiled again then ushered Sydney into the door, "Come in, come in." She switched to English with a very charming accent. "I am Amelie, you can call me, Bella...I am Michael's mother and you must be his Sydney." She kissed both of Sydney's cheeks just as Vaughn entered the room, enormous smile on his face.  
"It is a pleasure to finally meet you."

"And you." Sydney switched back to French.

"I see that my two favorite women have finally met." He replied smoothly in French as he went to hug Sydney. "You're early." He kissed her quickly, taking her bag.

"I got an earlier flight. You'll never guess who I ran into at the airport just after landing." She smiled with a light laugh shaking her head thinking about her father's appearance.

"Who?" Vaughn was curious as this was Paris, suddenly thinking it was someone they'd worked with.

"My father." She shook her head 'yes' at Vaughn's surprise.

"Your father is in Paris?" Bella asked just as confused, "Where is he now?"

"Jack is in Paris? Why?" Vaughn guided Sydney into the living room as they followed his mother. An immaculate room decorated for the Christmas season in blues, whites and dark greens.

"Because he's miserable without my Mom so he's flying to St. Petersburg now…He couldn't wait until Monday." She laughed, "You should have seen him Vaughn. He was so disheveled looking, I was having a hard time not laughing at him."

"He is a man very much in love it sounds like." Bella smiled softly, "Marie," She called to the young maid with a beautiful smile, "Would you please bring us some coffee and cake. And take Sydney's bags to Michael's room." She returned her gaze to the now blushing Sydney Bristow.

"Of course Madame." The girl smiled and disappeared as quickly as she came.

"Your mother is a very interesting woman I'm learning." Amelie leaned back against the chair and crossed her legs. "And very beautiful from the photographs I've seen on television and in the recent magazines. I see you take after her."

"Thank you." Sydney smiled nervously, "And yes, my mother is very interesting it seems. I'm constantly learning new things about her."

"Did you have a good time in Moscow with her?" Vaughn reached his arm around the back of Sydney's shoulders, resting it on the back of the sofa.

"We had such an amazing time. The night after I talked to you, we went to one of her favorite restaurants in the Square and then for a walk by the river, just talking. We talked about everything, from you and I, to she and my father and the story of how they met."

She smiled wistfully thinking about it, "She told me about the day I was born and its hysterical, I'll have to have her tell you sometime." She started laughing. "All these little things we never had a chance to talk about, we have now. Then yesterday we went shopping for all of these beautiful little kids at the orphanage. I had no idea but every year she buys them all toys and clothes and she's…she's just amazing Vaughn."

"I just can't tell you how amazing it was going to that orphanage and seeing those little kids faces light up when they walked in the room and saw her; saw the presents. She was so natural with them, just like I remembered as a child. It just reminded me again, that she's the same mother I've always had, always loved…" She paused to smiled thinking about it, "And then last night the Putins' watched Lena while Mom took me to the famous Bolshoi Apollo Theatre to see the 'Nutcracker,' my favorite ballet as a child. And then again in another one of her surprising reveals, I found out that she was not 'just a ballet dancer' but that she was with the Moscow Ballet and was the Sugar Plum Fairy! Can you believe that?"

"Who's the Sugar Plum Fairy?" Vaughn asked innocently earning astonished looks from both his mother and Sydney.

"She's the beautiful, enchanting ruler of the Sugar Plum Kingdom, son. Only every little girls dream." Bella smiled easily, shaking her head at Vaughn's lack of knowledge on the subject and sharing a private laugh with Sydney.

"I know you know the song!" Sydney laughed as she began to sing the notes using the word 'da.'

"Oh yeah. I know that song…but not familiar with the actual story behind it. I've also heard the remake of that song, 'The Revenge of the Sugar Plum Fairy' with the guitar. Now somehow with that version of the song, I can envision your mother in that part. " He laughed and Sydney hit him lightly on the arm.

"Ha ha. Very funny."

"So you had a wonderful time then." Bella smiled with laugh watching her son interact with the young woman in front of her, liking this girl more and more with every smile, every laugh.

"Yes. I had a wonderful time. She gave me something to give to you actually." Sydney smiled softly and went to her purse, returning with an envelope marked 'Amelie & Michael' in Irina's beautiful script. She handed them to Vaughn as Bella came to sit on the other side of her son.

"They're photos of your father. From his life in Russia." Sydney smiled softly sitting next Vaughn.

They sat quietly looking at the photos of Mikhail as a little boy and then a young man, right before he'd moved to America, before his assignment that led him to France and Amelie.

"You look so much like him Vaughn." Sydney smiled.

"Yes, he does." Bella added softly, blinking back tears. Vaughn pulled out the last photograph.

"My mother said this was the last photograph taken of him. After he was extracted back to Russia, he went to Siberia for a little while. She said this was taken just before he tried to come back to you… and was caught. That's why he looks so sad, he missed you." Sydney felt her own tears welling in her eyes, seeing Vaughn and his mother both with tears streaming down their cheeks. "She said to make sure to tell you…that he loved you both, so very much. You were in his every thought, of every day until the day he died."

Vaughn wrapped his arms around his mother as she tried to hold back the tears before breaking into a sob.

They held each other for the longest time before their cries turned to sniffles then a smile.

Bella stood and pulled Sydney into a big hug, kissing her cheeks and then her head before hugging her again. "Thank you Sydney. Please tell your mother…Thank you for these. And Thank her for what she did…Michael told me that when they tried to escape, when Mikhail was killed. That she let herself get caught trying to give him a chance to get away…a chance to come home to us. I'll never be able to thank her for that. Giving up her freedom to save my husband…that was a very selfless act, especially since she had her own family she was trying to get home to. She must have loved him very much." She smiled, wiping her tears and Sydney's. "Someday, I would like very much, to sit and speak with your mother about his life before us, and after, and what happened on the day he died…I just need a little more time. Will you tell her that for me please? I hope she'll understand."

"Of course." Sydney hugged her back, "She'll understand, probably more then anyone…she'll understand."

"Thank you." Bella kissed her cheek, and then pulled her back to smile. "Now, enough of this crying. We need some laughing. I think later we'll have to pull out my photo albums and let you see Michael growing up."

"Oh Maman…" Vaughn wrapped his arms around Sydney from behind, snuggling his head next to hers, laughing at his mother. "Why must you torture me?"

"Michael, I'm not torturing you! You are so handsome and I'm sure Sydney would love to see you as a baby and young man."

"I absolutely would." Sydney smiled, "It's only fair since you've seen all mine from Mom's DVD."

Vaughn smiled and rolled his eyes, "Yeah but you were really cute. I'm just a dork."

When Sydney burst out laughing he added, "I swear, you'll see. I was a scrawny dork. I might as well have had a pocket protector."

* * *

**____*****A Time For Us (Romeo & Juliet)piano***

When Jack finally arrived in St. Petersburg, he was exhausted and looked like he'd been to hell and back. He ended up having to fly to Moscow and then get a connection to St. Petersburg and all he wanted right now was to hold Irina in his arms, kiss her and his baby and then take a hot bath. He was certain he'd get the hot bath and to hold his baby but whether or not Irina would let him hold her and kiss her was still in doubt.

When his taxi first pulled up to the gate of Alexander Palace it took Jack's breathe away. It was decorated with an unbelievable amount of lights everywhere, all white, on every single tree and around the fence, around every colonnade on the palace and the entire roofline.

With the fresh cover of snow it looked like something out of a fairy tale...then again, this was a palace and he was here to search for his princess. 'No not princess,' Jack thought to himself with a smirk remembering Irina's defiant 'I'm not a princess,' the first night he'd come here. He was here to search for his Empress and the thought made him smile.

This time he had no problems getting past the guards and once he was standing on the front landing, his nerves set in. He pressed the doorbell with his thumb and waited with baited breath.

Dmitri answered the door moments later. "Da svidanya, Mr. Bristow." He didn't smile, a little surprised not only to see Jack but by his appearance. "Irina didn't tell me to expect you," He ushered Jack indoors, taking his bag and coat immediately.

"She doesn't know I'm here. I wanted to surprise her." Jack smiled nervously, wondering why the older man was being so cold to him.

"Where are my girls?" He looked around hearing music coming from somewhere.

"They are in the Throne Room." Dmitri smiled warmly for the first time looking towards the opposite side of the palace, "She's playing lullabies to the baby."

"That's Irina playing?" Jack looked surprised toward the room the music was coming from. Having no idea she could play so well again after her injury.

"Yes." His smile dissipated quickly, "I'll take your things up to your room."

"Ok, Thank you." Jack couldn't believe he felt intimidated by this older man. Maybe it was because he'd taken on the role of Irina's father and protector when her father died. Jack remembered their 'last' conversation about 'protecting Irina.'

Jack walked slowly toward the room and the melody grew louder as he neared. He paused in the doorway of the candle lit room and felt his breath catch when he first saw her.

Irina looked as beautiful as ever with her long dark tresses swaying slighty over her white cashmere sweater as she played. The baby, strapped to her chest in the Baby Bjorn.

He sat quietly on the chair just inside the door, not wanting to disturb them, and to be able to watch. He hadn't seen Irina play for over twenty years and it was awe inspiring, like she was playing straight from her soul.

There was no music in front of her, she played from memory and by ear, she always had.

When Irina finished the song she sat there quietly a second and then seemed to sense she was being watched. She turned her head expecting Dmitri and instead found Jack. She didn't say anything, just stayed frozen looking at him.

"That was beautiful." Jack smiled sheepishly and stood, walking over to them.

"Thank you." She looked away and pushed her hair behind her ear.

"I didn't know you could play like that again." Jack squatted down near her by the bench so they were on the same level, but not invading her space.

"I didn't either until I sat down and started to play." She ran her hand over the top of their baby's head softly as she slept, lulled to sleep by her mother's playing.

"How's your hand?" Jack asked reaching out to hold Lena's tiny foot in his hand, trying to find someway to break the ice.

"It feels alright." She smiled softly, before asking in a quiet voice, "What are you doing here? It's not Monday yet?" She paused for a moment, "You look terrible." Irina ran her hand over his stubbly face before pulling it back quickly, averting her eyes.

"I feel terrible." Jack said, finding her eyes again with the admission. "It's taken me forever to get here. I ran into Sydney in Paris." He smiled softly catching her surprised reaction but she said nothing. "She said you'd already left Moscow but I had already gotten my flight there. So, I caught a connection up here as soon as I could... I've been miserable without you." He finally admitted, taking hold of her hand and 'thankful' when she didn't pull away, realizing this was his chance to lay it all out there.

"I've decided that even an hour away from you…is too long after more then twenty years apart. I came to apologize, to say I'm sorry… to ask you to forgive me for being such an ass. I was just insanely jealous, like you said, at the thought of any other man making love to you…I was wrong. I said some terrible things I didn't mean. I know in my heart without a doubt, that you love me above everything else except our children." He looked into her eyes and saw her starting to tear-up, but she stayed silent, letting him continue. "It was my head that was the problem. I let old emotions and memories of the past creep in and take over and as a result, I fell back into an ingrained habit of doubt and insecurity where you're concerned. I thought that after everything we'd been through, that those doubts and insecurities vanished. But at the first test of our relationship, my emotions proved me wrong. I hadn't dealt with them and somewhere they were lurking in the back of my mind waiting for the first opportunity to strike out at you. To make you pay for all the pain you'd caused me when you left…" He swallowed hard, finding his mouth dry admitting this but knowing it was absolutely necessary in earning her trust in him. He had to be honest, completely honest. "I know now, your reasons for leaving…that you had no other choice but knowing now, didn't take away the memories from that time period…and that was what my head was struggling to let go of. Somewhere inside of me, I needed that confirmation, that promise of where exactly I stood in your life… What I meant to you…Hearing that tape…realizing in my head what I already knew in my heart. When you left you took my heart, but you'd left me with yours. Dubey was right, and I was a fool…you gave me the most precious thing in the world, your heart, because you loved me and you trusted me and I ripped it out and threw it right in your face. I feel so terrible, because I know how much that hurts…its how I felt twenty years ago."

Jack reached up and gently wiped the steady stream of tears now rolling down her cheeks, dripping from her chin, "And doing that to you didn't make us 'even' or make me feel any better in fact I feel worse because I hurt the one person I love more then anything, the one person I love so deeply I would do anything to keep you from harm…and then I was the one that caused the harm. I'm just so scared of losing you again I let my fear take over and pushed you away…I'm ashamed of the way I treated you, what I said. I'm so sorry. You didn't deserve that."

He looked into her big brown eyes with his own blurry ones, making sure she understood fully what he was about to say, taking both of her hands into his he leaned forward, inches from her face.

Irina was trying to keep herself from breaking into sobs and her body was shaking.

"Sydney asked me how I knew you were the one for me…I said I know that you're the one for me because whenever we're apart, I can't stop thinking about the next time I get see you again. Every minute we're apart feels like I'm holding my breath… Since the first day we met, you've been the first person I think about when I wake up and the last before I sleep…even during our twenty-year separation."

A small sob escaped from Irina with that admission and Jack moved in closer, "You know me better then I know myself and every time I see you smile, " He smiled at Irina, getting her to smile in spite of her tears, "I fall that much more in love with you." He brushed the tears from her cheeks again, kissed the back of her hand, holding it to his heart. "You are my equal in every way and what we lack in ourselves, we find in each other. We complete one another. I'm committed to you, our relationship, our life and our love… I will spend forever and always proving my love and trust to you. I want to put the past hurts behind us… I love you. You have my heart. I want to be the man worthy of your heart again."

**____*****Lovesong***

"You told Sydney that?" Irina sniffled, barely above a whisper, her body still shaking as she looked into Jack's eyes.

"Yes," Jack smiled and felt him-self chuckle at her question. She was obviously in shock. "I mean every single word, Irina. Every. Single. Word." He kissed her palm between every word, and held her hand against his face. "Please believe me." He was searching her eyes for some kind of reaction.

"I do believe you, Jack." She ran her thumb over his cheek as he held her hand in place, her voice now calm and steady. "And you have my heart, you've always had it…and yes, it hurts to have it thrown back at you and I'm sorry for doing that to you all those years ago…If I could have found a way…I would have."

"I know." He kissed her palm again, quickly seeing the tears pooling in her eyes again and feeling them in his own. "You did everything you could to stay, I know that and I forgive you. I know you didn't want hurt me, hurt us and now you have to forgive yourself, Irina. It was a situation you had no control over, it was out of your hands." He wiped her tears again and ran his fingers through her hair, putting it behind her ear. "The important thing now is, we survived it. We found our way back to each other and I have no intentions of ever letting you go again. I'm not afraid of our past anymore, I'm embracing it as its made us who we are 'now.' And I didn't lie when I said those were the happiest eleven years of my life…our marriage, it really was the years without that I couldn't stand."

"Before we can bury this 'big pink elephant' as Sydney would say," Irina spoke slowly then broke into a grin thinking about their oldest daughter,"There are some things you need to know, need to hear too. First being that I do love you more then any and all else with the exception of our children, that will never change." She smiled taking a breath. "Second, we haven't had a chance to ever talk about this, maybe I was scared that before you'd never believe me but…You know how the KGB had agents integrated in three phases? First is establishing, second, is receive your mark and form relationship, third is begin the actual act of espionage?" She was looking at Jack, waiting to see if he was following.

"Yeah, I know the phases…" He was suddenly finding it difficult to swallow, unsure of what she was about to tell him.

"The first four months of our relationship…Jack," She looked into his eyes seeing the confusion already there, "Those were not part of my assignment. When we met, it was by fate. It was not planned, I was only in Phase One… in fact I was trying to stay away from you, from my feelings for you because I was worried that once I got my 'assignment'…I wouldn't be able to give you up." She was searching his eyes for a reaction as she saw a million different emotions racing through them, mostly shock. "It wasn't until after we'd already started our relationship that I was told you were my 'mark.' There were other options for me, like the bastard Cuvee told you but they'd chosen you for me because I'd already established a relationship with you. He really didn't have a choice. And in all honesty, I was elated to find out that you were going to be my 'mark' because even though I felt terrible for stealing from you…lying to you about who I was, I got to keep you. My Jack. I got to keep you. I didn't have to give you up like I thought I was going to have to. Those first four months were the most freedom I'd ever felt with you. No lying, no stealing…just us. I'm sorry for being selfish and bringing you into all of this but I was so in love with you, its all I could think about. I was fighting how I felt about you all the way up until you kissed me against my apartment door, on my birthday…our first date, do you remember?"

Jack nodded he did, still stunned. It wasn't something he'd ever forget.

"Jack, our first meeting, our first date and kiss…the first time we ever made love and the hundreds of times after that in those months before I found out my assignment; that was 'us' Jack, not my mission. Everything before May 1st, Jack... none of that was tainted with my mission."

"Why didn't you tell me before?" He croaked out barely above a whisper, finding himself reeling.

"We haven't really had a chance to talk about it since my return and mostly I never brought it up because frankly, I knew you wouldn't believe me. Not then. Not when I first turned myself into CIA custody and not when I came to you that night at the house to tell you about being pregnant. I'm telling you now because you need to know, I can't keep that to myself anymore. Do you believe me? Because if you don't believe me, that you were posted as my mark after...its in my file that the CIA has confirms what I am telling you...If you don't believe me and need proof... Do you believe me?" She asked terrified that he wouldn't but hoping he would.

Jack's mind had been flashing back to that time period the entire time she was talking, her words overlaying images and moments in his mind. The first time they met, their first date and kiss, the first time they'd made love and all the times after…just as she said. He had his answer, just like he did when he looked into her eyes in Panama.

"Of course I believe you." He pulled her to him and kissed her quickly, "Of course I believe you. You fell in love with me before I was your mark…the same way I fell in love with you." He repeated to her, mostly to himself with a smile, not knowing how much that bit of information would affect him.

"Yes." Irina affirmed for him once again, while he held her face in his hand. "And there is something else I need to clear up for you." She sought out his eyes again, both of them taking a deep breath. "Jack I've only made 'love' with two men in my life. The others, Dubey included, were just sex…or being raped... The first, was my first." She paused making sure he understood what she was talking about.

"Mikhail." He breathed out barely above a whisper, picking the most logical choice with time frame, and age and someone she obviously loved at one time.

"Yes," She admitted 'not really surprised' he guessed correctly. "He was my first and last best friend until you…It was only one time. He knew what was going to happen to me when I went into the KGB…I didn't want my first time to be like that, so…" She trailed off, not feeling the need to go into details, "I loved him yes, but I was never in love with him the way I am with you. I was only fifteen and yes, I loved him as my best friend, my protector but nothing more. Which is why we decided, both of us, we were better off as friends." She smiled softly at the memory of her lost friend. "And the second, you know well. You, Jack, are the only other man I've EVER made love with. After I got out of prison…all those years without you. I could never make love with anyone else, I didn't want to. It was sex, and only sex. I had clearly defined boundaries and if he crossed them it was over immediately. No whispered words, no loving caresses, no 'good morning kisses' and I'd never stay the night or let them. After having you as my husband for over a decade there was no way I could make love to anyone else…especially since I still loved you and to do so would have felt like I was committing adultery… And after Kashmir, I didn't look at sex the same way anymore. I understood the difference between rape and sex and making love but my body…my soul had been through the motions so many times…that's all it could ever be to me. Until you…Until Panama. The last, and first time I'd made love to anyone in over twenty years…was with you, Jack." Irina held her breath looking into Jack's blurry eyes with her own.

Jack was floored by what he was hearing. Her reasoning, had been his own. "Me too…" He admitted barely above a whisper, "I just couldn't…didn't want to with anyone but you. I missed my wife…and in Panama, I found you again."

Irina smiled happily, and relieved to hear Jack confessing the same. The thought of him 'making love' to another woman in her absence had always stalked her mind.

And just as in Panama, she saw Jack's eyes going to her lips, she leaned in slightly, and his lips met hers in a soft kiss. His hands tangled into her hair, he captured her lower lip between his own and held the kiss for moment longer, not wanting the moment to end.

"I love you, Irina. Never doubt that." He whispered, staring into her brown depths just centimeters from her face. His breath tickling her face, she seized his lips with her own once more.

This time when they'd broke apart, Jack stood and pulled her into his arms, mindful of the baby between them, he held her against his body, relishing in the close contact. "I've missed you so much. I just never want to lose you again…"

"I'm not going anywhere Jack. I'm not going anywhere." She pulled back, cupping his face with her hands and a serious smile. "I love you… Why would I go anywhere else but where my heart is? You're 'home' to me Jack."

He leaned forward slowly, finding her delicious lips once more.

This time their embrace stirred Lena awake who began to whimper and let out a cry at being disturbed in her sleep.

Irina pulled back slowly, looking Jack in the eyes with a smile before calming Lena with her soothing Russian words, the baby completely mesmerized by the sound of her mother's voice. Jack leaned forward and placed a soft kiss to his daughters' head.

"Hello my sweet baby. I missed you." He smiled before kissing her again.

The baby's face suddenly contorted into complete distress before letting out another thunderous cry.

"Shhhh." Irina tried not laughing at Jack's defeated look at his daughter's reaction to him as she tried calming the baby once again.

Finding she wasn't able to, she promptly removed her from the Baby Bjorn, and lifted her sweater. Lena calmed immediately in Irina's arms, getting exactly what she wanted. Dinner.

"She likes you better." Jack ran his hand over her tiny head, with a wistful look on his face as the baby nursed.

"She likes my boobs, Jack. Don't take it too hard." She smiled and laughed as they began walking out of the Throne Room and up the stairs to her room.

"I don't blame her. I like your boobs, too." He stared at her heaving chest, waggling his eyebrows with a smile. "Lucky baby."

Irina just laughed, shaking her head as Jack put his arm around her, pulling her into his side. "You look like you need a hot bath."

"Has it been six weeks yet?" Jack smirked at Irina watching her take a seat in the chair by the window.

"Is that the reason you apologized?" Irina gave him her sexy glare, caressing Lena's arm with her fingers as she watched Jack remove his shirt.

"Irina, no…" Jack's tone suddenly became serious; not wanting her to think that the only connection he felt was sexual.

"Jack, I'm kidding." She laughed lightly with Cheshire cat grin as she watched the sudden tension leave his body. "And no, it hasn't been six weeks. But we're close…"

Jack smiled, removing his belt as he walked towards her. Then placing his hands on either side of the chair arms, dropped his head to hers, finding her lips in another kiss; his mouth moving to kiss the spot just below her ear, sending a shockwave right through Irina.

"Care to join me in that nice warm bath?" He asked, face just inches from hers as he looked down into her dark pools again, reaching his hand under her sweater tracing the curve of the underside of her unoccupied breast with his fingers while his thumb flicked her already hard nipple.

"Now somehow I don't think that'd be a good idea. Maybe you'd better take a cold shower instead." Irina smirked seeing the growing bulge in his boxers, she reached out and traced it lightly with her fingernails, causing Jack's stomach muscles to visibly clench. With her devious grin, and seductive voice she added, "You're idea not mine, remember? Something about 'being buried deep inside me?"

"Ah, yes…" Jack stilled her hand, pulling it away from him. "Now I remember why. You're worth the wait." He smiled kissing her quickly again before retreating into the bathroom.

Jack emerged from the bathroom twenty minutes later, having had to take a cold shower before his actual hot shower, towel wrapped around his waist and wild hair.

Irina was gone from the room and he saw Lena lying in the middle of her enormous 'Imperial' bed, obviously awake and completely content now having a full tummy.

Jack smiled at his baby, noticing Irina had changed her into her sleeper already, covered in a little tiny snowflake pattern. He kneeled onto the bed and crawled over to his daughter, flopping down on his side next to her.

"Hi Sweetie." He smiled, reaching out to find her little hand and happy when she closed her fingers around his. "Are you scared of Daddy? I wouldn't be surprised if you were…Seems like I'm always yelling at Mommy and scaring you, huh?" He whispered and leaned in closer to her, placing a soft kiss to her forehead as she made a tiny yawn, thinking about the times when he had raised his voice around her.

First being the first time Irina said she felt her kick, at his house when she came to tell him she was pregnant and they'd fought. Then again the first night, before they'd 'made up' in St. Petersburg when he'd found her, and then again when Irina had returned from her run after Cuvee and finally, this last blow up in Jakarta when his verbal assault on Irina had awoken the baby causing her to cry. Like Sydney had said, he'd scared her.

Jack shook his head, realizing now the importance of Sydney's words about how he treated their mother affecting them, and how those actions had already affected his newborn daughter. He didn't want his daughter to associate his voice with fear.

"I'm sorry for scaring you." He smiled sadly into her little face, talking in a soft voice. "I promise I won't scare you again by yelling at Mommy like that again, ok? I love Mommy…and I love you." He dropped another kiss to her tiny ear. "I'm sorry."

Irina stood in the doorway watching, with a smile on her face. She'd gone to get Jack a tray of something to eat as they'd already eaten dinner for the evening.

"Feel better?" She asked walking into the room and setting the tray on the table near the balcony windows.

"Much." Jack smiled softly back, kissing the baby one more time before rolling over and off the bed. He walked slowly to Irina and the table, kissing her lips and pulling her towards his body. "I missed you so much." He admitted again, brushing his nose with hers as Irina's hands traveled down his bare back.

"I missed you too." She found his lips and bit it lip softly, letting her teeth drag along his bottom lip as she pulled away. "Dmitri made you a tray." She smiled, letting her hands fall from his back as she took a step towards the bed and their baby.

"Are you sure its not laced with arsenic?" Jack grumbled to himself as he removed the cover inspecting his dinner.

Irina chuckled softly as she lay on the bed next to Lena, "Why on Earth would you ask that?"

"I don't know what I did, but from the moment I arrived tonight, the old man has been like ice to me." He picked up some kind of Russian something-or-other made of bread and meat and took a bite. It was, really good and he shook his head approvingly. "Do you know what I did?"

"No, but why don't you ask him?" Irina smiled down at Lena, not looking up as she spoke. "Unless you're scared of him…" She looked up with her teasing grin, catching Jack's reaction.

"Ok, I will ask him…Tomorrow, I'll ask him." He'd accepted her challenge for what it was.

"Ok then." She laughed, peppering Lena's head with kisses before crawling off the bed and pulling her sweater over her head.

"What are you doing?" Jack's breath hitched as she continued removing her clothing.

"I'm taking a shower." She looked at him funny, and then broke into a grin, "If that's ok with you?"

"Yeah…whatever." Jack shrugged looking away flustered as Irina smiled to herself and slipped into the bathroom. Jack was sitting on the bed in his pajama pants with Lena sleeping on his bare chest when Irina finally emerged out of a steamy bathroom a half hour later.

"What'd you fall asleep in there?" He smiled stroking the baby's back, his hand covering her entire body before resting under her bum, boosting her up higher.

"Something like that." Irina smiled coyly, removing the towel from her head and letting her dark tresses fall wildly down her back.

Jack had no idea what that meant and maybe he didn't want to know with their 'current predicament;' and Irina wasn't going to elaborate obviously so he didn't ask anything more.

Irina knew what he was thinking and smiled to herself as she dropped her towel and picked up the bottle of lotion, pouring a small amount of the heavenly scent onto her palm before lifting her leg, resting it on the foot of the bed and massaging the lotion into her skin.

"I swear to God woman, you're trying to kill me!" Jack took a deep breath watching as she lathered up her naked body, just a few feet from him. The scent of the lotion tickling his nose and awakening all the sensations he'd just calmed down with his cold shower.

Irina let out a deep laugh as she flipped her wild mane over her back and lifted the other leg. When she finished Irina opened her armoire and pulled a nightgown out of the top drawer, pulling it over her head as she walked toward him.

_***Fade Into You ***_

"I was thinking." She smiled, crawling on all fours up the foot of the bed, up and over Jack's legs until she came to sit on his lap and her knees, straddling him. "About everything…about what you said tonight." She put her arms around his neck, Lena cocooned between their embrace. She looked into his eyes.

"And I've been thinking about what you said," He shifted his hips under hers,' trying desperately not to think about the fact she wasn't wearing any underwear and the entirely-too-close proximity of 'those' regions.

"Oh yeah?" She flipped her hair over one shoulder, bending her head down to place a soft kiss to her baby's head. "Which part?" The grinding of her hips driving Jack insane with her every move.

"Irina, either you have to stop moving or you're going to need a Chastity Belt as the only means of stopping me from breaking my own promise." He said seriously, looking into her eyes causing her to burst out laughing.

"Now there's the sense of humor I knew and loved so much." She smiled as her laughing subsided and Jack cracked a smile. She moved once more so that her feet were in a better position and not cutting off her circulation. She had a feeling they might be sitting like this for a while

"Are you settled?" He asked when she finally stopped moving, looking at him and biting her lip. When she nodded with a smile he tried to answer her question.

"I was thinking about all of it. Everything you said. And just before you walked out…Panama." He ran his hand down Lena's back, remembering exactly what was 'made' that night, in more ways then one: a connection, love and a baby…a new beginning.

"And what about Panama?" Irina asked twirling the hair behind Jack's ear with her finger.

"I was thinking how that night was the first night, I'd felt 'complete' since you left." He looked deeply into her eyes, reaching up to 'toy' with one of her own wet tendril curls framing her face, before putting it behind her ear with a smile.

"Me too. I didn't want the morning to come. I wanted that night to go on forever." Irina sighed with a small smile thinking about the events almost a year ago.

"Because you knew you were going to leave me…us again in the morning?" Jack asked, feeling it was now or never if they were going to keep building trust with honesty.

"Yes." Irina admitted softly, looking into his eyes. "I was waging a battle with myself all morning over my decisions…the entire week leading up to that morning actually. I didn't want to leave you again…leave Sydney. I never wanted to hurt you, betray you like that again." She looked down for a brief moment then found his eyes again. "Sydney wasn't supposed to still be working in the CIA when I'd planned out my extraction. That's why I wanted to bring down SD-6, so that she'd get out of this life and be gone from the CIA by then. So it wouldn't feel to her, like I was betraying her again."

"And me?" Jack asked softly, swallowing the lump in his throat wondering what she thought about betraying him then. "What about betraying me again?"

"Jack I never thought we'd find each other again…" She reached up and lay her palm on his cheek and then down to hold onto his neck, running her thumb over his jaw. "I never expected that I would 'allow' myself to remember how I felt about you…I'd survived without for so many years by turning my love for you into hate. Because if I hated you, despised you…I wouldn't miss you. It was the only way I could keep going…" She sighed and took a deep breath thinking back to that day. "I'd seen your debriefing tapes after your imprisonment…I knew you turned your love into hate as well." She saw the shock on his face and paused briefly. "When I saw you for the first time…when you came to my cell that day. I saw the look in your eyes. My speculation was confirmed. You hated me. You wanted to kill me…" She ran her thumb over the ridge of his ear nervously. "What I said to you, I didn't mean it."

Irina found his eyes with hers, making sure he knew she was speaking the truth. "I was trying to push your buttons because even if it was 'hate' you felt for me, it was something and something was better then nothing at all. As long as you hated me, it made it easier for me to go through with my plan. What I didn't count on, was how 'deep' your hatred of me ran… framing me for Madagascar." She searched his eyes seeing the obvious sadness and guilt there for his actions.

"I'm sorry for that; for what I did. I was terrified." It was Jack's turn to see the surprise in her eyes, he ran his hand down her arm."Terrified for a lot of reasons. For Sydney of course, that you'd betray her; hurt her in your end game. I was terrified that you'd tell her what I'd done with Project Christmas, that she'd hate me and I'd lose her forever...Mostly I was terrified… because…the moment I saw you, I knew I'd been lying to myself. I didn't hate you at all… I felt the same skip in my heart as the first day I looked into your big brown eyes." His hand ran up her arm and cupped her face, staring into those same big brown eyes. "I was scared to death to let myself fall for you again. That's why I framed you. If you were gone, out of our lives…you couldn't hurt us again. Hurt me. Destroy my life again…"

"I'm sorry…" Irina reached her hand up to hold his wrist as his hand still cupped her face.

"I know you are." Jack gave her a small smile. "If you can forgive me for trying to have you executed, I can certainly forgive you for the past, I know, wasn't your fault."

"In India," She swallowed the lump in her throat, starting again with a smile, "When we were ambushed, the way we could still read each others minds…and then on the train remembering our 'toaster incident," She laughed as Jack smiled thinking about that 'incident.' She didn't need to say the rest; he knew what she was thinking.

That's when both of the cracks began in the walls around their hearts, remembering that 'love' existed there once…and still did somewhere inside them.

"I'm just glad Sydney didn't ask anymore questions about that night. Like 'why' you forgot about the toast you were making." She smiled, running her hand down his arm, laughing at the thought.

"Yes, 'Thank God' her mind moved onto the hotel and ice cream sundaes. Telling her I was too busy thrusting into you on the kitchen table over her painting of 'Cookie Monster' to notice any fire, wouldn't have been an option." He grinned widely at the memory.

"Definitely not an option. Which is why I left you to explain." She smiled running her hand over his shoulders with a small laugh.

"Yeah I noticed." Jack moved his hand over her satiny nightgown to rest on her rear. "Thankfully she remembered only the sundaes."

"Which we let her have out of guilt, for destroying her 'beloved painting' she'd made for you." Irina laughed shaking her head. "Didn't you tell her that you took it to work with you? That's why it was missing?"

"Yeah…I lied to my four year old." Jack shook his head in shame with a grin. "God, we were terrible parents."

The laughter faded with that thought.

"I loved seeing Sydney smile at remembering though." Jack added after a minute of contemplation.

"Me too." Irina moved her hand over Jack's chest and brushed the back of Lena's cheek with her finger, in thought for a moment. "Then you remembered 'who' I was didn't you? And thought it was a lie, that night together?"

Jack nodded solemnly, "Under orders to fabricate a life with me…' That's what I kept thinking."

"But that's not what I was thinking that night, you realize that now right?" She turned his chin up to look at her.

"Yes. I know that now." He smiled. "That's why it's a happy memory again." He pulled her forward to kiss her.

"Why didn't you leave me there?" Irina asked when they broke apart. "In Kashmir after I gave you the keys and told you to leave. Especially if you thought I never loved you…that it was all a lie."

"Because I, still loved you." He ran his hand down her back again. "I wasn't going to leave you there to die in the air strikes. I don't care what reasons I tried to tell Kendall or Sydney and even myself were for not leaving without you. The simple truth…was that I still loved you. I wasn't going to let you die there." He smiled and shrugged. "You'd given us a way to escape when you had the chance to betray us… That's when I started to hope, that maybe I was wrong about you. Maybe you did turn yourself in to make up for 'past mistakes' as you told me."

"The 'illusion of freedom." Irina repeated from that conversation. "I seriously thought about taking you up on that offer. Telling you my plan."

"But the lure of Rambaldi was too strong." Jack shook his head.

"I had to stick to the plan. The plan is what I 'knew.' Thinking about anything else was dangerous." Irina smiled softly, thinking about that day. "I'll admit to you though, finding out we were still married made me so happy. It was another connection…another thread of our life to hold onto."

"So was I," Jack admitted, "For the same reasons. I came to you for help with Kane because I needed to be in your presence. Like I said before. I'm addicted to you. The more I'm around you, with you, the more I crave you. I love your resonating mind and the way we can think and speak the same things without ever having to say the words. I'd missed that."

"Me too." Irina smiled. "My thoughts kept drifting off though. The unresolved sexual tension was killing me by then." She laughed. "Between the arguing, the adrenaline and sitting in such close proximity. Especially after twenty years…"

"Believe me. My mind wandered to." Jack laughed thinking about it. "Like how I could take you on the floor, the table, or up against the glass."

"Really…interesting." Irina pinched his nipple with a naughty grin. "Almost makes me want to go back to my cell. Just so we can try that." She laughed.

He ran his hand down her thigh. "If your little genius mind can think of a way to do it without the entire Ops floor watching, I'm in."

"Oh... I'll think about it." Irina laughed, as did he. "And hold you to it Agent Bristow. Then you'll really get to see 'this bad' girl in action." She looked at him seductively.

"I've seen this bad girl in action remember? Bangkok?" He raised his eyebrow as his hand slid higher up her thigh, bunching up her nightgown and exposing more flesh.

"Ah yes, Bangkok." She laughed slightly, remembering Jack's reaction when she came out of the bathroom.

"Scared the shit out of me with your spectacular use of knives. Gave me a real reality check, that you really are lethal when you want to be." Jack shook his head remembering watching as she let Stuka play his 'game' and then killed him and two of his bodyguards within seconds using the same knife.

"Only when I 'have' to be." She corrected him.

"Don't get me wrong, its also sexy as hell to see you in action. Watching you walk into that club…Wow!" He smiled. "Took my breath away… you are so beautiful."

She looked softly into his eyes, speaking softly. "You saved my life that night...After all I'd done to you…you still saved my life. My emotions almost got the best of me on the flight to Hong Kong thinking about that."

"I know." Jack smiled softly. "That's why you switched subjects…"

"And you switched back." She returned the small smile.

"Reminding you that I loved you deeply once…" Jack laced his fingers with hers, lying on his chest. "And I had to leave because looking at you, being that near you…I was about to admit, I still did."

"Saying goodbye to Sydney…Before we left for Panama." Irina held his hand with both of hers, playing with his fingers as she talked. "Had almost been my undoing. I kept thinking about the last time I'd had to say goodbye to her." Irina felt tears start to pool in her eyes. "When she put her hand up to my against the glass. I remembered doing the same thing with her on the day of my extraction and I had to pull my hand away, or I knew I'd burst into tears. After that, the whole trip to Panama…that's when the internal war started…'go' or 'stay."

"I know." Jack reached up with a smile, wiping the lone tear that had spilled over lid. "You were fidgeting like crazy the entire flight and then when we were going over the plan."

"You noticed that huh?" She smiled and blinked back the unshed tears as Jack nodded 'yes.' "When you removed the tracker…feeling your hands on my skin again I forgot everything I was thinking, what I was saying…I knew you were thinking what I was thinking."

"I had to kiss you." Jack remembered the look in her eyes, the softness of her skin, her beautiful lips that he'd longed for, for so long. "And once I did…I couldn't stop. I had to be as close to you as possible. And being inside you for the first time in twenty years…was like coming 'home.' That's how I know what its like to make love." He looked down at sleeping baby on his chest, the physical manifestation of that love. "I knew you were up to something with Sloane. I wanted to be wrong. I wanted to you to stay with me. Waking up next to you…I could barely breathe. For so many years I dreamed of you there, right next to me again and then there you were. Real and in the flesh, your warm body curled into mine. I didn't want to wake you either." He spoke softly, looking into her eyes. "I didn't want you to leave me again."

"I didn't want to leave either." Irina felt the unshed tears coming back. "I went into the shower and sat down and cried. All those feelings for you that I'd compartmentalized, locked away since Kashmir, were out."

Jack was surprised, having no idea she'd been crying in the bathroom that whole time.

"But I pulled myself together. And tried to move as slowly as possible getting ready to pro-long my departure. You did too. You were analyzing me weren't you? Because you didn't trust me and you knew what I was going to do."

Jack nodded 'yes.' "I knew you were upset. The kiss in the bathroom, and then again right before we left the room. When you were looking into my eyes. You were trying to tell me that you loved me. And the last kiss…I knew, was a 'goodbye' kiss. God, I wanted to be wrong."

"Yes." Irina's mouth felt dry as her tears clouded her vision. He had seen what she was trying to convey. "When the limo pulled up that was supposed to be carrying Sloane, Jack, I abandoned my plan."

His eyes went wide in surprise, letting her finish.

"I decided I couldn't go through with it. But Sloane changed the plan, he wasn't in the car and I decided, Sloane's not in the car, I'm not going. But as Sark was leaving, I knew we'd lose our chance to get Sloane that's when I asked to take the guards."

Jack's mind raced back to that day, remembering Kendall asking 'why the hell doesn't she just get in the car, we'll track her?' Irina indecisiveness and then how she asked to take the guards.

"I was hoping to buy time, hoping you would figure out 'what' I'd been planning and stop it, stop me. When I heard the chopper with the Delta Team I was relieved, you'd caught on." Irina sighed,"But we'd thought of everything. And the team lost the limo in the switch. When Sloane pulled up, I knew I'd made the choice and now I had to follow through with it."

It was Jack's turn to sigh at what 'might have been' if only… There was no use in playing the 'if only' game. She was here now and that is all that mattered.

He put his fingers through her hair, cupping the back of her neck gently and pulled her lips toward his in a soft kiss then rested his forehead against hers for a moment 'Thank God' she was with him now.

"In Germany, when you called out Sydney's name…You were trying to save her life weren't you?" Jack asked softly when they parted after a minute.

"Yes." Irina sighed again, "I knew she'd chase me out of the building." She bit her bottom lip nervously thinking about that day as did Jack.

"Marshall said your tracking signal was lost because of an electrical overload. How did you cut the signal?" Jack's brow creased in wonder following her gaze as she looked down to her chest.

Irina traced the moon shaped scars with her finger. "There was no time to cut it out. I knew we had to overload it. So, I had Julian zap me with cardiac paddles." She shrugged, with a half smile. "There was no time for gel."

Jack inhaled sharply thinking about the drastic measure she'd taken to disrupt the signal and reached out tentatively to touch the light marks."You're crazy." He looked her in the eyes before breaking into a smile.

"So some say." She smiled.

"Where'd you go after that?" Jack was curious about her time after escaping, having never talked about it with her before.

"We went to Tuscany." Irina put her hand over Lena's head, remembering yet another tragic day and incident this little baby had survived. "That was a terrible day." Her brows furrowed in sadness. "In the tunnel with Sydney…neither one of us wanted to shoot at each other. I'd shoot at her when she was around the corner, she'd shoot at me when I was behind mine. It was awful. When she caught me on the ladder, there was no way I could let her take me back to prison for life or rather my death as I'd broken my immunity agreement. There was this moment that we both kind of froze, just looking at each other before she shot me. She gave me my freedom…and we lost Emily."

She shook her head taking a deep breath trying not to cry. "Sloane told me Sydney had spoken at Emily's 'funeral' just after Barcelona, when she'd faked her death. He told me what Sydney said…I couldn't let her give up on me yet, let her believe I was a 'heartless monster,' that's why I sent her the message."

"Truth takes time." Jack said softly, understanding now how terrible Irina must have felt hearing that Sydney believed her to be an 'unfeeling monster that never loved her.' That Sydney had basically said she 'wished' Emily was her mother before she knew the 'truth' about Irina.

"She didn't believe I loved her." Irina shook her head slowly, remaining silent for a moment looking down at Lena and thinking about Sydney before adding,"I loved her from the moment I knew I was pregnant with her. I knew I wasn't going to be able to keep her, keep a baby that 'we' made… Which is why I didn't tell my handler that I was pregnant until after I knew it was too late for an abortion."

Jack's mind suddenly went to Irina's KGB file and her 'reasons' to her handler on 'why' she couldn't terminate the pregnancy. He also remembered accusing Elsa Caplan of 'selfishly' wanting to keep her baby because of Irina choosing to keep Sydney.

"Where did you go just now?" Irina scrunched her eyebrow, having seen the look in his eyes.

"I was thinking of someone else who defied orders and had a child with their 'mark.' Defied orders again by saving the life of her 'husband."He answered ominously, running his hand over Lena's back.

Irina studied Jack a moment, thinking before she came to a realization. "Elsa Caplan." Her guess was confirmed correct when Jack's eyes darted up to hers. "How are they?" She knew the CIA had put them into witness protection.

"Doing ok." Jack finally answered after thinking for a moment if he should or not. She obviously knew anyway. "Were you responsible for sending her to the US?" Jack wondered now that he knew she was the 'ruler' of the Russian government.

"No." Irina answered truthfully. "I knew of her, but it wasn't my call at that time to send her on that mission. That was before I had complete control over the FSB."

"She knew about you. 'Irina Derevko." Jack said softly, remembering his and Elsa's heated argument over Irina.

Irina took a deep breath realizing why, "They used my 'mission,' my behavior as an example. In their own twisted way of course." She shook her head.

"Example how?"

"Well, my mission was viewed as 'highly successful' in spite my refusals to comply with orders in the end of killing you and bringing Sydney back with me, because after so many years abroad, they were able 're-educate me' when all was said and done. They used me as an example at the Academy." She paused tracing, the outline of Jack's thumb with her own. "The cyanide pill became standard proto-cal... because of me. Because of my mission, and my refusal to kill you." She looked into his eyes. "That's why she knows about me."

Jack's mind was spinning. Because of Irina, the KGB had found a way to take the control away from the agent and give the power back to the superiors.

"Thank you for not following that order." He smiled softly breaking into a smile trying to lighten the sudden depressing mood.

"There was no way I could." She smiled back, leaning in to capture his lips as her hands ran through his hair, pulling his head towards her.

The kiss quickly turned heated, both of them wanting so badly to do, that which they could not.

Irina pulled back suddenly, "I know, I'm sorry," realizing they had to stop before things got out of control. "I just can't help myself right now. I love you so much. Talking about all of this…realizing once again what we've made it through. I just want you."

Jack reached up cupping her face with one hand, brushing her cheek with his thumb, "Don't ever apologize for that." He smiled, kissing her softly once more before breaking the contact. "Did you have a good time with Sydney in Moscow?" He changed to happier and safer subjects.

"Of course." Irina smiled, dropping another kiss to Lena as she couldn't help herself. Her baby was too beautiful not to shower with kisses.

"We did a lot of talking too. We talked about her relationship with Michael, about yours and mine and the story of how we met." She smiled brightly, "She asked me to tell her about the day she was born." She laughed recalling the day and Sydney's reaction. "She loved that story."

"I do too." Jack smiled, "Even though you were scary." He laughed as she swatted him laughing.

"I brought her with me to the orphanage and took her to the ballet." She smiled wistfully thinking about both. "We laughed, we cried, we laughed some more. Then we cried some more. It was wonderful." She laughed at Jack's reaction as he mouthed 'women,' rolling his eyes.

"What did you do at the orphanage?" Jack asked curiously.

"I buy the kids Christmas presents every year and spend the day with them. We even talked about 'Cookie Monster." She laughed thinking about the 'toaster incident' they'd just discussed. "Sydney helped me this year and we had a lot of fun, which by the way reminds me…" She waggled her eyebrows while Jack was still in 'awe' of another surprising aspect of Irina he hadn't known about. "Since you're here, I need another helper tomorrow with the orphans here in St. Petersburg? I promise I will make it worth your while," She said in a low husky voice, wiggling her hips.

He had an idea of how she intended to repay him. "Why do I have a feeling this somehow involves me doing something I won't enjoy very much?" He arched his eyebrow with an accusatory look as she laughed.


	30. Chapter 30

_**AN: Okay, first I'm warning that this chapter contains some HOT HOT scenes. Whew! But also very important information. Basically, its a loaded chapter in many ways! LOL**_

_**Music for this Chapter (on repeat):Santa Baby by Eartha Kitt, Gravity of Love/O Fortuna by Enigma, Let My Love Open the Door by Pete Townsend, I Would Die For You by Jann Arden.**_

* * *

THIRTY

o

"Oh come on, Jack! It wasn't that bad!" Irina laughed the following evening, snapping his red suspender as walked passed him in the kitchen.

"The things I do for you!" He mock grumbled as he finished his dinner and put his plate in the dishwasher.

"I think you're a very sexy Santa Claus." She whipped him around, pinning him to the counter, grinding her hips into his. "I wouldn't mind you sliding down my chimney, or up it rather." Irina broke into a deep laugh that shook her whole body, snapping his suspenders again before walking away.

"Russian tease." He mumbled again, his mind wandering to places she was suggesting, he could not go.

"Admit it. You had fun." Irina smiled as she leaned over, picking up Lena from the Moses basket. "The kids loved you, and you loved them…"

"Ok, I had fun." Jack sighed before breaking into a smile, walking over and kissing Irina soundly on the lips. "Watching you with them… was the best part. Makes me wish we had ten more kids." He laughed, kissing Lena's head.

"I think you've had too much Egg Nog." Irina laughed, resting her cheek against Lena's head. "I told you I would make it worth your while…and I will." She gave him her enigmatic smile as she walked towards the door, sashaying as she walked. "Come Santa, its time for bed."

Jack followed Irina up the stairs and into bedroom, where she laid Lena in her bassinet sound asleep. She smiled and kissed the baby softly, pulling her blankets up around her before turning to Jack.

"You don't mind if I use the bathroom first do you?" She smiled softly, kicking off her shoes as she went.

"No go ahead." Jack sighed, flopping down on the bed to wait his turn.

"I shouldn't be long." Irina smiled and disappeared behind the door.

Jack was perusing through a book on her nightstand when Irina opened the door and a vision of red caught his attention.

_***Santa Baby***_

"Oh Dear God," Jack dropped the book and his breath caught in his throat as Irina leaned back against the doorframe, heaving her breasts upward, seductive smile in place with a dangerous gleam in her eyes, a wet-dream come to life.

She was wearing a bright red baby-doll bra, with sheer fabric surrounding her chest, tied with a delicate red satin ribbon in the middle of the actual bra, which was heaving Irina's already engorged breasts upwards, forming massive cleavage.

Jack watched breathlessly as her nipples hardened at the mere sight of his reaction to her.

Her matching thong barely covering her most coveted spot as its garter clips attached to her thigh-high stockings running down her gorgeous, endless legs and ending in high heels with red fluffy tops.

Irina arched her back, running the forefinger of one hand coyly across her wet lips as the other hand caressed the smooth taut skin of her abdomen just beneath the shear fabric.

Jack felt an instantaneous jolt to his groin, from his balls to the tip of his penis as Irina began her slow walk towards the end of the bed before crawling on all fours like a lioness on the prowl up onto the mattress as she'd done the night before.

The angle her body projected to him, gave Jack a perfect view of her breasts, swaying with her every move.

Irina smiled, enjoying Jack's reaction of speechlessness as she promptly climbed onto his lap, pressing herself into his groin eliciting a sharp intake of breath from Jack, feeling him already hard when she was settled, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Now I know… you're trying to kill me." He finally got out barely above a whisper watching as she cocked her head to one side with that 'damn' smile.

She grabbed him forcefully, smashing her luscious lips into his; her delicious tongue plundering through his lips, flicking the roof of his mouth before finding his tongue, sucking it into submission before plunging her tongue in deeper, grinding her hips into Jacks groin, rubbing her sensitive aching nipples against his soft white undershirt.

Jack's hands slid under the sheer fabric and up the silky skin of her rear. "What are you doing?" He gasped, out of breath and panting, finally pulling back, "Irina, I won't be able stop if you keep this up."

"Then don't." She smiled drawing his searing mouth onto hers once more. Biting, sucking, licking and nipping him into a frenzy.

"Wait, wait, wait…" Jack closed his eyes feeling his engorged cock throbbing against his boxers and the bottoms of his velvety Santa suit. "We can't." He tried to catch his breath rapidly running away from him, resting his forehead against hers with labored breaths, her face in his hands.

"Yes. We can." Irina moved her mouth onto his chin, sliding her tongue along his jaw line as she whispered huskily into his ear. "I called the doctor." Her tongue flicked his earlobe and Jack's hips jerked as her hot breath hit his sensitive cheek, "He gave the 'ok." She drew the piece of hanging flesh into her mouth, sucking as she heard Jack's breath hitch once more.

"Really?" He grabbed her solid upper arms, pulling her back forcefully to look her in the eyes.

"Yes." She nodded, wiggling against the strain in his pants, feeling it continually rising beneath her. "Merry Christmas." She let out a small gasp like the one he'd heard in Panama.

"Oh 'Sweet Jesus." Jack lunged at her, his hands tangling into her chestnut locks, as a wild frenzy of dueling tongues raged between their open mouths.

Irina's hands found their way beneath his t-shirt, finding his nipples and twisting them with just enough pressure to elicit a soft moan from Jack against her mouth. She drug her nails down his chest to his boxer line before slowly raking them back up causing him to quiver beneath her touch.

_***Gravity of Love/O Fortuna ***_

Jack's thumbs worked slow circles around Irina's nipples, the feel of the fabric and the force he was using leaving Irina panting as his head dipped, trailing his fervent tongue down her scorching flesh, nipping, sucking and lapping at the soft skin finding her rapid pulse beneath.

He slid one hand over her taut ass realizing both cheeks were completely exposed and gave it a firm squeeze before trailing his fingers over the sensitive skin of her hip and down the front of the satiny fabric radiating heat from her core beneath.

Jack's fingers massaged her through the fabric as Irina vaulted towards his hand. He slid his fingers beneath the small band and found her all ready slick with desire. His fingers easily sliding between her folds and finding her engorged clit, eliciting a sharp hiss from Irina as he pinched the swollen pleasure point between his thumb and forefinger.

He smiled as Irina was now completely distracted by his ministrations against her with his fingers.

Her hips tilting, arching towards his fingers and palm as he increased pressure and then pulled away teasing causing her to groan.

"Jack…" She mewed, thrusting her hips down onto his hand again when he pulled away all over again.

Jack coaxed her grinding against his hand with his index finger making a 'come hither' gesture between her folds, flicking her clit at the end of each stroke, his hand soaked at her readiness. He sucked on the pulse point on her neck lightly before finding her mouth and thrusting his tongue and finger simultaneously into Irina's hot depths, his mouth covering her gasp of surprised. "I'm going to cherish everything about you…" He pulled back looking into her brown depths.

Irina maneuvered Jack's suspender straps over his shoulders and suddenly pulled back and away from him in one swift move to stand beside the bed.

Surprising Jack as she forcefully grasped the front of his shirt hauling him to his feet so he was standing before her. With a crazed look in her eye she took both hands and ripped his white shirt clean from his body in one fall swoop.  
Pleased with her handy work she pushed him roughly against the wall curling one leg around his, pressing against his groin as she felt his bulge with her hand.

"Cherish me later, fuck me now." She commanded with her deep lust laden voice and Jack went rock solid instantly hearing her words. He flipped them around, pinning her against the wall with his chest pressed against her heaving swells as he dropped his red pants, leaving them pooling at his ankles.

Jack's hand snaked down Irina's sides simultaneously pressing his rock hard shaft into her firm stomach, arresting her mouth once again in a searing kiss as his hands grabbed her bare ass squeezing roughly as he lifted her suddenly, slamming her against the wall with an audible 'thud.'

"Sorry." He huffed, looking at her apologetically, pulling his head back to look in her eyes before he thrust upward completely into her searing core in one swift motion, his ass clenched and her eyes widening she gasped at having his body buried deep into hers, digging her nails into his shoulders causing Jack to wince. "You're so beautiful." He whispered against her mouth and stilled momentarily allowing her to adjust to his size as she wrapped her legs around his hips and crossed her ankles.

Irina kissed him soundly and Jack pulled out slowly, enjoying the friction as she clenched her muscles around his shaft and when his tip was at her entrance he drove back into her again, going deeper then before and earning another pant from Irina as her breath was stolen away.

"Oh my God... you feel...so...good." Irina hissed into his ear with pleasure as she clenched her thighs tightly around Jacks hips feeling their wet bodies beginning to slip.

Jack panted into her neck feeling the flutter of her eyelashes against his scorching skin as he pulled out and thrust into her again, using his hands fingers digging into her ass to pull her even nearer. His measured thrusting was absolute torture for Irina whose core was aching against the friction.

She tilted her hips to create the perfect pressure, guiding him where she needed it, timing her thrusts with his own. "Faster Jack." She chanted into his ear as he slammed into her again, the sound of slapping skin echoing in the room as he increased the speed of his thrusts.

His thrusts were stealing her breath away and the small sounds he heard escaping from the back of her throat encouraging his pace as his ass and abs burned, knees about to buckle.

"That's it." She felt herself getting close and threw her head back as Jack pounded into her. "Yes…yes. God yes Jack." Her pleasure became louder he drove wildly into her, feeling the first quivers of her orgasm against his member and then the full force of the explosion as her muscles pulsated around him and Irina screamed out as her whole body trembled, lights exploding behind her eyes as Jack kept driving, deeper, faster, bringing her to the full height of her bliss, and trying not to lose it himself as he wanted this night to last.

Her muscles in her abdomen quivered as she came down from her high, her vision returning though her pupils completely blown with ecstasy as Jack watched her come back from heaven.

Jack's thighs were soaked with her juices, the scent of her sex making him rock hard again inside her as he carried Irina with her legs still wrapped around him to the bed. He pulled out leaving Irina gasping at the suddenly loss of contact kicking off the red pants tangled around his ankles and situated himself between her thighs as she spread eagle for him again. Jack started kissing the sensitive spots on her inner knee and up the inside of her inner thigh, tasting the rivulet of her scent trickling down there as he climbed higher and higher. Unclasping her garter clips from her stockings as he went. Just before reaching his goal he moved and slowly draped Irina's top open, laying back the delicate fabric and placing light kisses around her belly button, swirling his tongue in its depths causing her to mew as he worked his way south.

Pulling her thong straps over her slender hips, Irina lifting her ass by arching herself up on her heels against the top of the mattress; and setting it back down again as Jack kissed the entire length of her leg to her toes pulling the sex drenched thong off slowly as to not remove her sexy heels, before letting it drop with Santa's trousers.

He picked up her right leg and kissed the tender flesh of her calf before draping it over his shoulder and then picked up her left leg, kissing it in the same way and knee before draping it over the other shoulder. He smiled down at Irina, grasping his engorged penis in one hand and teasing it against her slick folds and throbbing clit, pinching it with his other.

Small sounds of need began escaping from Irina again as her body naturally arched towards Jack's and he grabbed her hip with one hand positioning himself at her center and plunged into her heat yet again feeling a ripple of the muscle spasm inside her immediately as her body enveloped him and leaned forward with his hands on each side of Irina's gorgeous chest ; thrusting in and out of her gradually as he moved forward and then reversed.

His forward thrusting bringing Irina's knees up past her own shoulders as he found his depth inside her in their rocking motion.

Irina reached down between their bodies and found her pulsating clit rubbing and pinching the sensitive flesh adding to her own pleasure and Jack's, watching their combined efforts.

When Jack drove forward again his teeth clenched onto an end of the tiny satin ribbon and as he pulled back untied the bra releasing her breasts. Her rock hard nipples grazing her own thighs as Jack pounded upwards into her, rolling her into ball as her legs went over her head.

Deciding she wanted to take control of this situation as Jack pulled out used her hand to pull Jack's arm out from under him, upending them and putting her on top where she broke into an enormous smirk straddling Jack with her thighs pressed tightly against his sides.

Jacks hands found her firm ass and jerked her down hard onto his shaft as his eyes were mesmerized by her enormous breasts moving in and out of the fabric now draped loosely over them in a private game of 'hide-n-seek', her rigid dark peaks tipped with droplets of milky-sweetness exposed with every thrust and every arch of her back.

Irina used her thigh muscles to slide herself up and down the length of Jacks' cock, as she leaned forward grazing her breasts against his slippery torso, placing hot opened mouth kisses around the sensitive parts of his neck, and chin before biting his lip softly but hard enough to draw blood and make Jack yelp with pleasure and pain.

Irina smiled, kissing the bloodied lip and pulled herself erect atop him again. Seeing that Irina was in full control of their thrusting, Jack's hands meandered around from her fabulous ass to her drenched essence using his thumbs to press and rub her clit in sync with their rhythm driving both closer while Irina increased her velocity as he increased his against her bundle of nerve endings.

"Jack …I'm close." She panted and then her breath hitched, face contorting as she neared her climax.

"Me… too…" He groaned loudly feeling her powerful muscles milk his member and then release in perfect time with his thrusts.

Irina's hands slid across her sweat soaked abdomen and into her drenched folds to replace Jack's, working their magic on her sensitive bundle of nerve endings.

Jack's hands went back to her rear, bending his knees and digging his heels into the bed, using the leverage to help them increase their speed of rhythmic thrusting.

Their efforts had the intended effect as Jack felt Irina shatter and watched as she arched her back throwing her breasts forward with erect nipples pointed toward the ceiling calling out his name and with one last fierce thrust felt himself explode inside her as Irina continued to ride out both their orgasms for as long as she could; Jack gasping for breath as they both came down.

Irina collapsed onto his chest, his rapidly deflating member still inside her as her muscles continued to exploit it by their own free will. Jack wrapped his arms around her back and used one hand to pull her tangled mane away from her face and his where it had fallen when she had.

He kissed the top of her head as one hand traveled down her sweat-slicked body to cup her taut ass and hold her where she was.

"Don't move." He said when he felt her about to pull off of him. "Just stay here a minute." He had to seize his breath as Irina stilled with her cheek against his pecks, feeling the rapid pounding of his heart against her flesh, his chest still rapidly rising and falling beneath her weight. "This is the part… where I get to cherish you." He sighed and pulled her tightly against his quivering body and smiled when he felt her laugh vibrate from her chest straight to his.

"That… was the most amazing Christmas present, I know… I've ever had." Jack smiled after a few moments of lying together, both of their breath having evened out. "When on Earth did you ever have time to buy this festive little outfit?" He asked running his hand over her stocking covered thigh.

"The day we went shopping in Beverly Hills." She smiled, tracing circles around Jack's nipple, her voice vibrating through Jack's chest as she spoke.

"Sydney saw you buy this?!" He sucked in a sharp breath causing Irina to laugh.

"She was buying something similar Jack. I pretended not to see what she was buying, she pretended not to see what I was buying." Her body shook with laughter on top of his as he groaned, covering his eyes with his hand.

"I did not need to know that Sydney bought something 'similar." He playfully, pinched Irina's butt causing her to jerk away, and pinch his nipple hard.

"Like mother like daughter." Irina kept giggling, turning her face to his, and resting her chin on his sternum.

_***Let My Love***_

"Stop!" Jack said sternly, reaching up with both hands to cup her face and bring her head down to his lips. Silencing her with a kiss as he rolled them over so he was on top again.

"You're lucky I'm still as flexible as you 'assumed' I'd still be." Irina arched her eyebrows, teasing him as the kiss ended and Jack propped himself up on his elbows to look down at her.

"I figured, once a limber dancer, always a limber dancer." He grinned wickedly capturing her wrists and pulling her arms straight above her head, letting his fingers gently caress the skin as he followed the length of her arms down to her torso.

"Yeah well, I still think I may require a massage… so I don't get a cramp." Irina smiled, rubbing her breasts against his chest beneath him.

"I think we might be able to work something out." He dropped a kiss between her breasts onto the jagged scar left behind from her heart surgery. "How's your heart?" He looked at her a little concerned, remembering all she'd been through in the last few months.

"Fine." She smiled, touched by his concern. "Still racing in my chest, but that's not unusual when you're around." She wrapped her arms around his neck, bringing her swollen lips to his delving into his hot mouth once again, unable to get enough."I love you…" She whispered, rubbing her nose against his softly.

"And I love you…" He answered in Russian. Finding her lips once more in soft, linger kiss before pulling away smiling. "I think we should play a game while I give this massage." He sat back on his heels, pulling away from her reluctantly.

Slowly, he ran his fingers up the length of one of her legs and slid his fingers beneath to top of her stocking, pausing just briefly to caress her smooth skin before slowly rolling it down her leg, kissing the newly exposed skin lightly as he went and sending a shiver through Irina.

When he reached her foot, he carefully removed her heels and then the stocking, throwing them both behind him before doing the same with the next leg.

Irina lay there watching him with a smile until his task was finished and he reached his hand out to her, waiting for her to take it. She did and he pulled her upright, in front of him. Watching fascinated as he slowly, slid the bra straps off her shoulder and down her arms.

"What kind of game?" She felt her breathing quicken again with his gentle kisses and caresses.

"Your body has changed a lot in the last twenty years…" Jack kissed her neck softly, just below her ear as he pulled the garment free and threw it too, behind them. "All these scars I have yet to learn the history behind. I want to learn everything about my found again 'Wonderland.' Every. Single. Little. Mark." He planted kisses around her mouth between each word.

"You know a lot of them already…" She spoke so softly if his ear hadn't been right next to her mouth he wouldn't have heard.

"Tell me again." He trailed his tongue along her collarbone, nipping the flesh softly with his teeth before placing an open mouth kissed in the spot. His hands on her sides just below her breasts as his thumbs began massaging the skin covering her rib cage."Like this one." He kissed the puckered circle of flesh just above her right breast, so softly she barely felt his lips as her skin burned with his every touch.

"2002 Moscow." She let out a little gasp as his tongue circled the quarter sized scar. "Gunshot. Cuvee." Her neck lulled to the side as his thumbs moved up to graze lightly over her already erect nipples.

"And here?" Jack moved his hand to cup the side of her neck, taking advantage of the exposed flesh as her head was tilted; he kissed a long faint scar just at its base.

"1998 Cairo. Stiletto. Disloyal associate." She panted, her hot breath tickling his ear. "He tried to decapitate me."

"Stupid man." Jack gasped pulling away slightly to look into her eyes briefly as his hands went to her back, and he tipped her back slightly. "And here?"

Her long hair cascading over his hands as her head fell back when his mouth traced the long incision between her breasts from the surgery.

"Again 2002, Moscow…" She hesitated a moment thinking of an explanation before she smiled, "repairs" earning her a chuckle from Jack against her skin.

He lay her all the way back against the pillows of the bed, sliding down her body to kiss another small round scar just under her right breast. "Here?" He asked breathlessly as his cheek brushed against the soft underside of her breast where another circular scar lay.

"Same event. Collapsed lung. Chest tube."

Jack closed his eyes momentarily as she spoke, hearing about yet another 'detail' from that night and realizing all over just what 'terrible' shape she must have been in. His expedition continued south and hovered just above her bellybutton, kissing the jagged scar there. "And here." He brushed his lips back and forth over the area, his eyes locked onto hers.

"1987 East Berlin. Stab wound. MI5 agent." She sighed heavily, shifting her hips as he moved his weight. "Assassination attempt."

Jack's hands continued to massage down her body as his mouth caressed ever so lightly the long thick scar across her abdomen that he'd made. "And this." He asked softly, his eyes finding hers again.

"Jack…" Her eyes pleaded with him not to make her say it.

"And this." He kissed it again lightly, bringing one hand to let his fingertips trace over it lightly, sending shivers through Irina.

"2002…Moscow…Gunshot… CIA agent…my daughters' father." She spoke slowly, her eyes never leaving his. "Shoot to kill order…protecting our child from a supposed threat."

Jack held his breath for moment reliving that moment when he'd watched her fall back into the hallway, there eyes locking as she realized it was him who'd shot her…and then the red blood smear she left behind. "And here." He moved onto the small incision above her right hip, kissing it as his thumb grazed over the protruding bone below.

"2000 Paris. Ruptured appendix. Good looking French Doctor." She smiled and Jack laughed against her skin.

"What about this?" He shimmied down the bed, kissing a long, large scar across the top of her left thigh.

"1994 Congo. Machete. Deranged tour guide." She smiled brightly and Jack burst out laughing at how funny she was being. "Couldn't follow directions."

Jack sat up and slowly bent her leg at the knee, bringing her foot in front of him. "And this?" He placed a soft kiss to the sole of one foot, already knowing what it was from having witnessed it on the tapes.

Irina took a deep breath, "1982 Kashmir. Torture. Bastardass KGB officers." She smiled lightly when Jack massaged her foot, placing another soft kiss against it. "Wouldn't admit I didn't love you." She added softly; when he crawled slowly back up her body, taking her wrists into his large hands over her abdomen.

"And these?" He kissed the scars from her restraints when they first raped her… so gently she felt tears beginning to well in her eyes.

"1981 Kashmir…Birthday present…Soviet Prison Guards and the prisoners from Cell block A." She answered as the unshed tears pooled in her eyes, this time; her response was not so funny. "Punishment for refusing to sleep with a monster."

Jack crawled over her, hand on each side of her head and held his gaze with her dark swirling pools for a moment before slowly lowering his head and kissing her softly as Irina's tears spilled over her cheeks. He pulled back and wiped the tears trails softly with the back of his hand. "And here?" He moved onto the scar against her hairline on the left side of her head. His face inches from hers.

"1982 Kashmir. Rifle butt. Soviet Prison Guard." She felt her breath catch remembering the day of her escape and watching the blast that killed Mikhail just seconds before her world went black. "Trying to escape hell."

Jack feathered her face with light kisses before gently rolling her onto his stomach beneath him. Straddling her bum, his hands smoothed the tense muscles in her shoulders and back as he placed a soft kiss to the puckered flesh on the side of Irina's left arm. "And here?"

"2002 Tuscany. Gunshot. My daughter." Jack raised his eyebrows in surprise, knowing Sydney had shot her in the arm but realizing for the first time, this was the scar from that horrible day.

"Shoot to kill order…revised." She smiled finally thinking about Sydney's 'gift' of allowing her escape.

"And these?" Jack moved to her left arm, kissing the numerous long and short jagged scars on the back of both her arms.

"2002 Mexico City. Glass shards. Myself." She giggled into the soft downy pillow as Jack worked his magic hands, finally causing one of her own wounds. "Pulling myself through a 19th story window."

Jack shook his head, sighing deeply over her thinking about how she'd gotten away in the most insane move he'd ever heard about as an agent.

"And this?" He bent over, his tongue circling a large piece of puckered pink flesh in the mid-left quadrant of her muscular back.

"1988- Leningrad. Gunshot. Russian mafia leader." She sighed into the pillow, feeling completely relaxed now with Jack's fingers digging out the tension and aching muscles. "He didn't like my takeover."

"And these?" Jack placed a kiss to her palm and then turned her hand over, peppering all the little scars there with kisses.

"2002- Moscow…again!" She let out an exaggerated sigh, "Stab wound. Cuvee." She hissed his name barely under her breath and Jack felt her instantly tense beneath him. "Sparing my child from his hideous methods."

Jack leaned over completely, brushing her hair off her face and kissed her the corner of her mouth, silently 'thanking' her for sacrificing herself to protect Sydney. "And this?" He moved down her body again, kissing it with a smile as she giggled from 'kissing her ass.' He recognized the scar on the top of her butt cheek from their 'former' life and wondered what the 'real' story behind it was.

"1962 Gryady. Puncture wound. Mikhail Vontonavich." She giggled and Jack's eyebrows narrowed thinking about 'how' that had happened. "He was chasing me with a fire poker and when I stopped suddenly, he stabbed me in the butt." She laughed at having felt Jack tense and turned her head to see him smiling and shaking his head as if she was 'crazy.'

The story had been 'close' to the one she'd told him. '1962 in Grady, Iowa. Puncture wound from her 'friend' Michael who'd, like she just said, accidentally stabbed her with a fire poker when he was chasing her with it.' Irina had been trying to give him as much of the 'truth' as she could without giving away her identity back then and Jack felt relieved.

When she let her head fall to the pillow again, Jack's eyes immediately rested upon the glaring blue ink of numbers and letters etched into Irina's flesh just above her rear, getting a 'close up' look for the first time; having only seen it from across the table before.

She felt his hands still as his mouth descended upon the permanent marking, instantly realizing 'why' his hands had stilled when she felt where he was kissing her so tenderly.

"And here?" He asked barely above a whisper memorizing the ID number in his head. His hand coming to rest on the side of her hip as his thumb traced over the number.

"1981 Kashmir. Identification tattoo. Evil Soviet doctor." She sighed, bunching her arms up under her pillow, crossing them beneath to raise her head. "For purposes of prisoner and body identification." She answered half way into her pillow.

"What do the last two letters mean?" Jack asked softly, noticing that their ink was a slightly different color, having been added at a different time.

"That I was 'successfully' re-educated." She turned her head, laying her face down on the opposite cheek. Jack felt his chest tighten and studied her beautiful face for a moment before kissing the digits once again.

_***I Would Die For You***_

Slowly, he kissed the sensual contours of her body as she purred happily beneath him, making his way back up to her mouth, which he found and turned her simultaneously so that she facing him once more. His love for the woman beneath him overpowering, Jack pulled back slowly, his elbows pinning Irina's arms to her sides as his body cocooned hers. He gently brushed a stray lock of hair from her forehead, looking down into her eyes as his lips found her sweet mouth again.

Irina slid her knee up between Jack's legs adding to an already escalating state of sensual arousal. She grasped Jack's sides just above his hips with her long slender fingers, pressing her thumbs into the indentions the curvature of his hipbones made, pulling his body against hers so that their lower bodies were pressed against one another.

He felt her shaky breath against his face at the contact and his tongue delved deeper into her mouth in slow measured caresses, taking turns pulling thee other's lower lip in and out of the each others searing mouths.

Jack slowly moved his mouth to her strong jaw line, kissing its underside towards her ear as his knees bent slightly, giving him more traction, Irina's radiating heat from her center against the flesh of his thigh as the two made contact.

She could feel his hot breath against her ear as his tongue tickled the contours of her ear and playfully bit and suckled her earlobe causing her breath to hitch when he hit a sensitive spot just behind her ear.

Her hands raked up the length of his masculine back and down again, grabbing his ass forcefully squeezing, causing Jack to gasp for breath in her ear.

Irina raised her other leg, lacing it over the back of Jack's calve holding him to her tightly as she rubbed herself against his thigh making both of them pant in desire.

She trailed her fingers slowly over the curve of his ass, then abs and found his cock standing at attention, her lithe fingers grazing its length lightly from its base to its tip, circling the rim with her thumb as Jack unconsciously jerked into her hand with the movements and hissed into her neck where he'd been accosting the hollow in her throat with his tongue.

She touched him so lightly and when she pulled away momentarily she smiled as she heard him whimper at the lost contact.

Cupping his balls lightly she felt his ass muscles clinch and his body surge forward from her touch. Her thumb and forefinger encircled the smooth base of his shaft and pulled painstakingly slowly towards its tip, and back down again taking all of Jack's strength not to start thrusting into her hand.

She felt her own wetness against his thigh from rhythmically rubbing against it, massaging her swollen clit. Her fingers dipped within her slick folds and dripping with her own juices she ran them up the length of Jack's dick, circling its head making Jack moan and quiver.

He decided he had to do something or lose it in her hand, knowing that after such vigorous activities earlier, he wouldn't be able to last as long this time.

He reached under him, seized her wrists and brought them above her head, holding them with one hand, smiling as his other crept slowly over the mounds of her breast, down her taut abdomen and circling her sensitive thighs as she ground herself into his thigh.

His wet cock briefly touching her searing skin as he moved; with every touch Jack felt himself clenching his muscles in response to the fiery need between them.

Looking into her eyes his fingers finally laced their way oh-so-slowly into her drenched folds, finding her throbbing pulse within and grazing it lightly, hearing Irina's sharp gasp as her eyes blinked rapidly, her chest rising and falling rapidly under him, her nipples like sharp tacks prickling his senses with every breath.

His hungry mouth latched onto hers, hearing her moan and melt beneath him as his fingers continued to pinch and tease her into ecstasy, his cock rubbing with measured thrusts against her wet thighs making him hard as a rock once more.

He sucked Irina's lower lip between his own as his fingers crept slowly deep inside her watching as her face contorted while she panted, sucking in her breath in short bursts feeling his fingers twist and turn inside her.

When they reached her spot her hips jerked against his palm and he felt her begin to shake him beneath him with anticipation as his fingers stroked her in a slow torturous pace. Hearing her small sounds of pleasure turn to whimpering as she tried to move her hips hurrying him along.

Continuing with his hand manipulation, Jack dipped his head to one of her dark brown, budding peaks, ripe with arousal and swirled his tongue in lazy circles, flicking it with his tongue earning him a taste of the sweetness inside.

Irina's knuckles were turning white and arms shaking as she held onto the pillow above her head, about to lose it feeling Jack's dual assault.

Dragging his tongue once more around her nipple, placing and open-mouthed kiss, biting and slowly dragging his teeth against the sensitive flesh won him a warm gush against his fingers as Irina quivered with pleasure.

Jack pushed back with one hand as he crept down her sizzling body with his tongue, placing several hot wet kisses just above her center and inner thighs as he rocked back onto his heels.

Trailing his tongue between the crease of her thigh, he plunged his tongue between her folds smiling as Irina gasped loudly when he captured her throbbing clit in his teeth, teasing it with his tongue as is fingers continued to stroke her internally.

The sensation of Jack's bite on raw electrified flesh igniting Irina's every nerve. He lapped at her flowing juices, biting, flicking and sucking her into surrender as she mewed with bliss. Her reaction and the scent of her essence driving Jack on as he quickened his pace, curling his finger inside her and rolling her knob between his tongue and teeth.

Her breathing quickened as his speed and pressure increased and Jack watched as everything from her abs to her ass began clenching in anticipation of falling over the edge as she was near exploding, her pants and groans growing louder until finally her body rocked with the explosion and Jack's tongue drank greedily at her flowing juices, continuing his assault as she rode out the shockwaves rolling through her every inch.

With her breathing still heavy and eyesight blurry, Jack pulled her up and onto his lap where he sat on bent knees. His throbbing cock between them, pressed into her stomach, her glass nipples against his own slick chest. His eyes went to her lips, noticing a drop of blood from where she'd bit it in an attempt to control her scream at climax.

His swollen lips captured hers in a mixture of metallic blood and Irina's scent, tongues plunging and plundering into their depths.

Unable to stand it any longer, Jack's hands found Irina's hips and lifted her upwards, sliding her body up his sweaty chest. Looking into her eyes as she wrapped her arms around his neck and he slowly, deliberately lowered her onto his painfully erect cock.

Her drenched center welcoming the invasion as Irina's breathing hitched and her eyes widen staring at him as he filled her up. Both panting when he'd found his depth, they stilled.

Jack felt Irina clenching her muscles around his dick and then release allowing him to slip further into her. His tongue licked her ear as she leaned into him, her voluptuous breasts rubbing achingly against his own sensitive nipples.

Jack's tongue swept across her neck and his hands splayed across her back, feeling every muscle there tense and flex as he gripped her swirling his hips in a circle, grinding into her and causing them both to moan at the unimaginable pleasure the angle of his cock inside her was creating.

Her heat inconceivable as her body massaged him out of their own accord. Jack's tongue moved down her velvety chest and as he did, leaned Irina back so that her back was arched, her head bent back, holding her up as his mouth teased her unyielding nipples once again with his scorching tongue.

Feeling Irina begin to grind herself against him, he moved his arm so that he was supported her arched frame with one arm behind her back and moved his free hand up her slick thigh between them and pressed his thumb into her engorged clit causing her to moan loudly as her hips bucked against him.

"Jack…please…" She begged for him to start moving inside her, as she leaned forward lapping at the sweat on his Adam's apple with her deviant tongue causing Jack to moan.

He moved his strong hands up her sides holding her in place as he withdrew slightly, and drove into her. Irina's arms wrapping around his neck, as he panted into her hair cascading around her shoulders with each thrust.

He swiveled his hips against hers and picked up the pace feeling them both begin to tremble in anticipation. Irina used her own thighs to help lift herself off him as he withdrew, clenching tightly to his member before Jack slammed back inside her

Their rhythm perfect, and familiar. The scent of sex hung in the air and Jack drove harder and faster, his abs, ass and thighs burning from the exertion.

Her hyper sounds of extreme pleasure ringing loudly in his ear as he thrust deeper into Irina finding himself shaking as her powerful muscles clenched like a vice around him.

"God…you're…so…tight." He panted into her hair surprised at how quickly she'd recovered from delivery. "You…feel…incredible." He pounded into her, the sound of their bodies smacking into one another bouncing between them. He felt Irina getting close as her breathing became erratic and the small sounds coming from the back of her throat turned into low growls. Faster, and harder Jack plummeted into her with everything he had left, moving his hands to her hips to speed up their pace, about to lose it himself he panted, "Look at me."

Irina pulled her face from the crook of his neck her dark pupils covering most of her eye.

Jack wanted to see her eyes as she imploded around him and he moved her hands to his shoulders to steady herself as Jack continued his pounding, her breath slipping away and feeling as though she were about to hyperventilate, flew over the edge as her body shuddered hitting her climax and began convulsing as Jack continued his mission feeling her muscles tense and tremble all around him pushing him over the edge after her.

"I…love…you…" He spoke to her heart in Russian as his eyes bore into her ebony pools. With one final upwards thrust that lifted her off the bed with a loud gasp, Jack exploded inside her sweltering core and continued to drive into her as the flashes of light and temporary blindness clouded his eyes.

He collapsed forwards onto Irina as he dug his toes and knees into the bed intent on riding out every last wave of pleasure his body would afford thrusting and thrusting as his ass screamed in pain. When he was finally spent, his legs and arms gave out and he collapsed fully onto Irina. His dead weight was covering hers, feeling her pounding heart against his chest. Jack was too tired to move but realized he was crushing Irina beneath him and rolled them over so she was on top, her lifeless corpse covering his body like a warm blanket. He watched her body rise and fall with his ragged breaths.

Jack felt her body trembling a top him and with much effort, moved his arm to place a hand over her back. As his breathing evened out he suddenly felt chilled soaked in sweat and Irina's body rapidly turning to a blanket of ice. She was absolutely still and if not for her breathing beneath his hand, Jack would have thought her dead.

As if right on cue, Lena started to fuss and then belt out a cry of hunger from her bassinet.

"Right on time." Jack sighed, smiling as Irina rolled off of him and took two steps from the bed before collapsing to her knees, her world gone black.

"Irina!" Jack flew out of bed instantly, adrenaline the only thing allowing his body to react so quickly.

She was about to fall over right as he hit the ground next to her, grabbing her shoulders and steadying her as he searched her face with concern. Her face that should be tinged with sedation, colorless.

The baby was screaming in the background and Irina blinked slowly, her sight slowly coming back to her as Jack kept shaking her shoulders and cupping her face, repeating her name in a chant.

"Irina! Irina!" Jack was panicked at her trembling body. 'She shouldn't still be trembling…' His eyes searching her body as her muscles continued to quiver and her eyes stared blankly at him. Finally he saw a spark of recognition and her head turned slightly towards him, she raised her hand to hold the wrist of the hand cupping her face.

"I'm ok." She sighed, feeling like jello and thankful for his steadying hand. Hearing her baby's panic she pleaded, "Jack…get the baby."

"Irina?!" He cupped her face with both hands, terrified at what just happened. "What's wrong?"

"Get the baby…please. I'm fine. I just blacked out…" She tried to move to get up and felt her muscles suddenly lock, realizing it had been hours since she'd eaten or taken insulin and with the extreme burning of calories and energy over the last couple of hours she'd likely gone into the danger zone.

Jack immediately scooped her up into his arms, carrying her to the bed where he pulled back the tangled mess of bed covers and laid her down, covering her shivering body with the warmth.

"I'll get your insulin. Where is it?" He ran his hands over her forehead and hair, scared shitless at how pale she looked and the blue ring around her lips, something he hadn't seen since her 'death' at the execution before they brought her back to life.

"Downstairs. In the fridge." She answered barely above a whisper. "Jack…the baby."

Jack turned quickly and practically ran to the bassinet where his little girl screaming her head off now, red with her efforts. He scooped her up and held her against his chest, trying to sooth her as he walked back to Irina.

Irina flipped open the blanket and rolled onto her side as Jack lay the baby down next to her, helping Irina to get her situated seeing she needed help with her little strength.

Lena was so worked up from crying for so long, Irina had a hard time trying to settle her down and get her to latch on as she continued to scream, her eyes producing real tears for the first time and breaking both Irina and Jacks' hearts. When Irina finally got her settled and nursing, she had tears in her eyes feeling so badly as her daughter continued to tremble and take erratic breaths much like her own.

Jack saw the tears spill over Irina's cheek as she wiped the baby's tears and quickly kissed the salty drop away whispering, "I'll hurry." He flew to the bathroom and found a robe, tying it around his waist as he made his way to the door in a frenzied pace.

He flew down the steps two at a time, his path lit in the darkness by the light cascading through the enormous windows above the stairs and ran to the kitchen, flung open the large fridge doors and finally found the insulin bottles on the side door.

He couldn't locate a syringe or alcohol wipes on the counter and began tearing through the cupboards at a wild pace, finding what he was looking for just next to the sink. He was to the library when he realized Irina needed something sugary to drink fast if she were low instead of high and flew back to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of orange juice Irina had bought for just such occasions. With everything he needed in hand, he ran as fast as he could up the steps berating himself for not thinking about how this much 'activity' on Irina, a little over a month after she almost died, would take its toll on her body.

When he flung open the door to their room, Irina's head was like dead weight on the arm curled under her head, her fingers of the other hand caressing Lena's head as the baby continued to hiccup while she ate.

Jack knelt beside them instantly, putting the items on the nightstand as he realized he forgot to get the testing kit.

Irina read his mind before he said, 'Damnit' under his breath and reached out with her hand to clasp his forearm.

"Calm down. I'll be ok." She tried to smile but it was futile, the blue ring around her mouth was getting worse and Jack's heart raced within his chest. "My kit's on the sink in the bathroom."

He jumped up and flew to the bathroom, returning to her side within seconds.

Irina held out her finger as Jack pricked the end, squeezing a small amount of blood onto the wipe strip and sticking it into the reader.

When it beeped and he read the results he sighed, and rapidly picked up the syringe and filled it. "It's much worse than when you went running." He looked at her over the bottle with concern written all over his face, flicked the end and pulled the comforter away from she and the baby's bodies.

Wiping the sweat-slicked spot just below her hip, he slid the needle in gently and pushed the plunger. Quickly covering them both again with the comforter's warmth.

Jack remained kneeling by the bed watching as the blue line around her lips slowly faded and her color came back to normal within a few minutes.

The anxiety leaving his body as he watched her finally smile at their baby kicking against her as she ate furiously, tiny hand clutching to her mother.

"It's ok, Jack." Irina ran her hand down his arm, lacing her fingers with his when she saw how upset he'd been. "I'm really ok. I just didn't realize how much energy we burned…I'm still learning how to handle this defunct body. But now I know… for next time, I'll need to revive myself between sessions and check my insulin." She smiled and laughed slightly trying to get him to ease up.

Jack knew she was right, and didn't want to voice his concerns again, he'd done that before and it ended badly. She was right, and he knew that. It was an accident, and they were both still learning her capabilities. He was still scared to death though, especially about the flashbacks to her death and feeling like he was watching her die all over again.

Quickly, he leaned forward, placing his hand against her back and bringing her lips to meet his in a hungry kiss to remind himself she was 'ok', still alive and right there with him.

Irina could tell by the urgency of his kiss that he'd been terrified at 'losing her' again, her mind flashing back to the other nights conversation. When they separated and Jack tried to pull his head away, Irina quickly cupped the back up his head and held it so that his face was just inches from her own.

"I'm ok, Jack." She looked deep into his eyes, trying to reassure him. "And I'm not going anywhere."

His shoulders slumped and he leaned in again to kiss her softly.

"I love you." She whispered when their noses brushed pulling away.

"I love you…" He brushed her cheek with his thumb, "You scared me." He admitted.

"I know." She smiled softly. "I scared me, too." She clasped his fingers in hers. "I'm sorry. I should have thought about it before hand."

"It's not your fault." Jack stroked her long hair over her back, "We're both still learning how to handle this, remember?"

She nodded, and brought their hands up to kiss his knuckles. "That was amazing though. Definitely worth the torture of waiting for all these months." She smiled brightly and Jack's heart skipped a beat.

"Definitely." He smiled warmly and shifted his weight so that his torso was leaning on the bed, one arm around Irina and the other lying beside their baby. "Maybe too much, too fast, too soon…but still amazing." He added quietly.

"Jack," She reached out gently taking his chin in her fingers forcing him to look at her, "If I would have remembered to eat more and take a higher dose of insulin in anticipation of this night, everything would have been 'ok.' Now please, stop pondering over the one blight on an amazing evening. Please…I'm ok, really."

Jack was having a hard time letting go of the fear she evoked within him but he sighed and tried to concentrate on the positives…which were plenty and fantastic; and if not for the 'blight,' as Irina called it, at the end of the evening, it would have been one of the most spectacular nights of his life.

"Did you see her tears?" Irina ran her finger softly over the tiny cheek of her daughter in wonder. "Real tears…"

"I saw them." Jack kissed Lena's tiny arm, feeling badly that his baby had to wait so long, screaming in the darkness while he made sure her mother was ok. "She seems to be 'ok' now. All forgotten and forgiven." He smiled, watching Lena nuzzle Irina's soft flesh with her tiny nose and palm her source of nourishment with her little hand. Jack reached over with his finger to lightly trace the outline of her sprawled hand and fingers, pondering the wonders of a woman's body and its multi-purpose functions, he smiled.

"I can't stand to see her so upset." Irina dropped a kiss to the soft spot on Lena's downy head. "Mama's sorry honey." She cooed to her in Russian and Lena's eyes fluttered open at the sound of her mother's voice briefly before closing again and nuzzling her face in further, getting completely comfortable as she fell asleep again.

Jack removed his robe and climbed in under the covers, spooning up behind Irina. He rested his face against Irina's and wrapped his arm around her placing a hand on Lena's back as she snuggled into her mother's body; his and Irina's legs automatically entwining.

* * *

Jack awoke in the morning with Irina's head on his chest, her wild mane spread across his entire torso. He quickly began scanning the bed for Lena and realized that Irina had put the baby back in her bassinet after her last feeding. He suddenly realized how hot Irina's naked body seemed pressed up to his and softly, reached his hand up to feel her forehead. Alarmed when it was scorching against his hand.

"Irina." He tried to wake her slowly, moving his body beneath her trying to rouse her. "Irina." He called again when she didn't move and his heart quickened its pace.

"Hmmm." She finally hummed against his chest with her eyes still closed, not wanting to wake yet.

"Sweetheart…you're burning up." Jack gently rolled her off him and she kept her eyes closed, turning to snuggle into the pillow once she left his chest. He pulled the comforter away and felt the skin of her arm, neck and then head again. She was on fire, "Are you feeling ok?"

"Nyet..." She shook her head slowly, eyes still closed, answering 'no' in Russian.

"What's wrong?" Jack brushed the hair away from her forehead with his hand, stroking it in a soothing manor, worried.

"I don't know. I just don't feel well…and I'm freezing." She tugged the blankets back up around her. Her voice had been deep and raspy like a frog.

Now Jack was really worried. 'Laura' had never been sick, and if she were, would never admit it unless it was 'really' bad. The fact that Irina had just admitted to not feeling well so easily, coupled with her raging fever and terrible sounding voice, sent Jack into panic mode.

As he got out of bed to get the thermometer, Irina broke into a deep 'barking' cough that Jack had never heard come out of her in all the years they'd spent together. He pulled his robe back on watching her with narrowed eyebrows as he made his way to her medicine cabinet.

Finding a 'brand new' thermometer, still in the box, a testament that she was 'never' sick, he grabbed a washcloth and ran it under cold water, wringing out the excess before making his way back into the bedroom.

"Open." He commanded and she complied 'too easily' for Jack, without ever opening her eyes. His hand stroking her scorching cheek as he waited for the beep to signal it was done.

"104.5! Christ, Irina you're on fire!" He immediately folded the cold cloth and placed it on her forehead. Pulling the blankets off her and leaving only the sheet remaining.

"Hey…" She protested, feeling for the comforter with a scowl on her face, eyes still closed. "I'm freezing here." She started to shiver again.

"You're burning up, Irina. That's why you're cold and shivering, because your body has lost control of its ability to set your internal thermostat." Jack pulled the sheet up around her, rubbing her arms with his hands trying to quall her shaking.

"What are you, a doctor?" She croaked out, teasingly with her eyes still shut tightly.

"You're one to talk, _'Miss Medicinal Berries with soothing properties_." He smiled, earning him a small laugh from Irina remembering their trip to India, causing her to break into another horrible coughing fit.  
"What's Alexei's number? You need to see a doctor right _now_."


	31. Chapter 31

**_AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Because You Loved Me by Celine Dion, and Push by Sarah McLachlan._**

* * *

THIRTY-ONE

o

"I'll be ok Jack." She took a deep breath when she was finished coughing. "I'm sure it's just a cold."

"You never get sick; and coupled with last nights 'blight,' I think you should see a doctor. Especially since your lungs are still healing." He paused, still stroking her long hair down her back. "So, what's his number?"

"Fine. It's in my cell phone, on my desk in the library. But I have to take a shower before he gets here and change the sheets on the bed." Her 'froggy' voice, making her accent sound thicker as she spoke in English.

"Why?" Jack asked baffled, "You can't even open your eyes and you think you can take a shower and change the bed? I think that fevers affecting your genius."

"Jack, I am not going to let any doctor, especially Alexei who's like another father to me, inspect me smelling like sex in sheets that's we christened in our exploits." Talking made her break into another fit of coughing, her eyes peering at Jack, looking at him for the first time all morning, then flopped back down on the bed, exhausted.

Jack realized she was probably right but she was obviously too sick to move. "Irina, isn't this the man who told you, you were pregnant, and took care of your prenatal needs? He 'obviously' knows we aren't celibate so 'who the hell cares if he knows?' I doubt he will. He'll be more concerned with 'why' you're ill."

"I care." She 'frogged' out, opening her eyes and throwing back the sheet, trying but failing to sit upright.

Jack reached out his hand to help and then pulled her body up next to his, feeling her legs too wobbly to stand on her own. "God you're stubborn!" He huffed, bending over and swooping her up into his arms to carry her to the bathroom. "It's definitely 'you' that Sydney gets it from."

_***Because You Loved Me***_

He set her down softly in front of him as he removed his own robe, carefully to keep her standing. She still couldn't keep her eyes open.

Jack maneuvered them into the shower and turned on the water, letting the steam rise and fill the glass enclosure.

"Now no taking advantage of me, Agent Bristow." She teased him, as her forehead rested against his chest, the water cascading down her back.

"You're practically dead in my arms, 'that' is the last thing I'm thinking about right now." He moved forward so that her head was completely under the spray, wetting all of her hair.

"No. I'm not dead." Irina coughed, "I've been dead and I think it's less painful then this." She started 'barking' again with such force her whole body shook in Jack's arms. Her comment and her present state worrying Jack beyond belief as he lathered up her hair in shampoo.

"Pain lets you know you're still alive right?" Jack whispered into her ear, rinsing the soap from her long tresses. The amount of pain Irina had been through in her life was unimaginable.

"I hate that saying." She turned her head, laying her cheek flat against his chest. "When you're in pain you wish for death and when you're dying you wish for pain to let you know you're still alive…but that brings you back to the first wish…it's a damn endless circle." She nuzzled her face into the crook of Jack's neck and closed her eyes, comforted by his hands massaging her head with conditioner.

Jack was busy pondering her thought and wondered how many times she'd thought about, been in situations where she was faced with those two things, to come up with her very accurate conclusion.

When he finished with her hair, he found her shower gel and squirted a healthy amount onto her purple mesh sponge. The bottle had read 'Rose hips' and he wondered briefly 'what the hell was a rose hip exactly?' The smell was heavenly and distinctly recognizable as Irina. Pulling her endless tresses off to one shoulder, he massaged her back with the foamy sponge, making circles up and down her spine, over her beautiful bum and down her legs… which was difficult, as she literally couldn't stand on her own. He backed her up, rinsing her off and then slowly turned her in his arms to wash her front. Up one arm and down the other, slow circles around each beautiful breast, across her ribs and down her taut abdomen. When he finished washing every last inch of skin on her body he turned off the water.

"What about you?" She asked sleepily against his throat as he guided them out of the glass doors.

"I'll finish later. Right now you are more important." He found a fluffy white towel hanging on the rack behind the door and began wiping the excess water of her body and hair. He quickly wiped the water off himself before wrapping Irina up in the towel and scooping her into his arms again.

Jack set her on the edge of the bed and went to find her a nightgown in her armoire. When he turned around, Irina had fallen over sideways, lying on the bed. He'd never seen her this sick with the exception of the immediate ramifications of her execution and he could hardly swallow his concern.

Gently her propped her upright again and released the towel, letting it drop as the put the gown over her head, moving her arms through the openings and pulling it down as far as he could with her still sitting. He scooped her up again and set her in one of the big chairs in front of the glass balcony doors while he went about, stripping and making the bed. Looking around the room for the articles of clothing that had been tossed in their love making and adding them to the pile of laundry. He stuffed them all into the hamper and turned to Irina.

"Where are the clean sheets?" He asked having never witnessed her making this bed as he pulled on pajama bottoms.

"Closet. Right side. Third drawer down." She answered barely above a whisper without opening her eyes.

Jack found them exactly where she said they'd be and quickly made the bed, even changing out comforters. When he picked Irina up again, he felt her hot lips against the soft skin of his neck.

"Thank you." She sighed, nuzzling into him as she carried her.

When she was settled, he checked Lena one last time before heading downstairs.

He found her cell phone on her desk and when he looked up, found Dmitri staring at him, with accusatory eyes.

"What are you doing?" He asked with his thick Russian accent.

"Irina's sick. I'm calling Alexei." Jack answered a little annoyed, still not knowing what the butlers' beef with him was.

"What do you mean she's sick? Irina is never sick." His face contorted with worry as he stepped closer to Jack.

"I know. That's why I'm calling the doctor." Jack punched a series of numbers into the phone. "She's burning up, has almost lost her voice and has the worst cough I've ever heard."

"When did she start to feel ill?" The man was in obvious worry.

"Last night I guess. She woke up this way." Jack answered quickly as he heard Alexei answer on the other end. It was still early and his office hadn't opened yet so Jack called the private line listed in Irina's information. "Alexei…This is Jack Bristow, Irina's husband." Jack answered in fluid Russian.

"Oh yes, Jack, how are you?" Alexei was obviously surprised to hear from him.

Dmitri left the room and headed up the stairs to inspect Irina himself.

"I'm fine it's Irina…she's terribly sick. I've never seen her, this sick and I'm worried. She's burning up with a fever of 104.5, has the chills, a barking cough and she's losing her voice. Last night she blacked out when her blood sugar skyrocketed and I'm just terribly worried. Can you-"

He couldn't even finish before Alexei answered, "I'll be right there."

"Thank you." Jack sighed, hearing the same concern in the older man's voice. He hung up the phone and went to the kitchen to thaw some frozen milk and make Lena a bottle, as Irina was way too sick to feed her.

* * *

Jack entered his bedroom ten minutes later to find the older man sitting on the bed beside Irina with a look of absolute worry across his face as he stroked her hair. His eyes met Jack's as he made his way over to the bassinet.

"How is she?" He whispered to Dmitri, picking up Lena and snuggling her into his embrace.

"Sleeping." Dmitri answered quietly, feeling her forehead again. "She's burning up."

"I know." Jack carried the baby over to the chair and sat with her in his arms as she began to whimper with hunger. She didn't want the bottle at all, but was finally too hungry to care and began sucking away as Jack swayed from side to side. "Alexei should be here any minute."

Jack's cell phone started to ring and he quickly got up to retrieve it from the dresser. It was Sydney. "Hello?" He answered softly.

"Dad? Why are you whispering?" She asked confused on the other end of the line.

"You're mother's sleeping." He moved into the hallway.

"She never sleeps this late…is something wrong?" Sydney's voice immediately flooded with concern knowing her mother would normally be awake now feeding her sister.

"She's not feeling well, Sydney."

"Mom's never sick." He heard her voice tense and crack. "What's wrong?"

"We don't know. She woke up this morning burning up with fever, her voice is almost gone and the most horrible cough I've ever heard." He answered honestly, trying to hold the phone to his shoulder and support Lena and her bottle.

"Well did you call the doctor?" He could hear her whimpering on the other end, scared as he was.

"Yes. He's on his way now."

"I told her she was crazy for going running the other morning! It was freezing outside and she was as cold as ice when she came back." Sydney thought back to waking-up to a frigid cheek against her own. "I told her that probably wasn't good for her to be doing while her lungs were still healing."

"She went running? In Moscow?" Jack's voice rose in tone with disbelief.

"Yeah. She didn't tell me, but I think she had a nightmare and needed to get out for a while…clear her head. But Dad, it was freezing outside. And we'd just come from Jakarta where it was blazing hot! That's can't be good for her." Sydney sighed flustered she wasn't there to help. "I'm getting on the next plane to St. Petersburg."

"Sydney no. Let's just wait to see what the doctor says first, all right? She would be more upset to find out you left Paris early to watch her sleep. You're coming tomorrow, that's soon enough, ok? I promise I'll call as soon as we know what's wrong." Jack shifted the baby making his way down the stairs as the doorbell rang. "He's here now. I have to go, Sweetheart."

"Call me as soon as he's gone."

"Promise. Ok. Goodbye."

"Bye Dad."

"Alexei," Jack opened the door and was greeted with a blast of freezing air that made his hair stand on end. "Thank you for coming so quickly." Jack helped the man out of his coat, still juggling the baby and bottle.

"Jack, good to see you but not great circumstance." Alexei reached his hand out to shake Jack's with a small smile. His eyes lighting up his smile when he saw the small bundle wrapped in pink in Jack's arms. "And this must be the beautiful 'Grand Duchess Lena!'" He smoothed his palm over the baby's soft hair, staring at her in wonder. "She's so beautiful Jack. Congratulations." He smiled warmly, "Looks just like Irina when she was this size, unbelievable." He marveled shaking his head. "I'll have to hold her and welcome her properly after I look at her mother." He picked up his black bag and followed Jack up the staircase. "What else can you tell me?"

"Well our daughter Sydney just informed me that Irina went running in Moscow a couple of days ago when it was freezing outside. Just after we'd come from the heat of Indonesia. I don't know if that has something to do with it or not." Jack relayed everything he knew. "And then last night, she nearly blacked out. Scared me to death. She had a blue ring around her mouth and her skin was clammy. I gave her an injection of insulin and she seemed better."

"Jack, I've heard rumors about her being executed by the CIA, is that true? I need to know. I haven't had a chance to speak with Irina since her return to Russia." Alexei asked when they stepped inside the room; Dmitri immediately glared at Jack, having heard the entire question.

"Yes," Jack swallowed hard under the scrutiny. "She was 'legally' dead for over 35 minutes from Lethal Injection...Potassium Chloride. It took some extreme measures but they managed to bring her back. That's why she has to take insulin." He felt his mouth going dry, looking at Irina and remembering her body bouncing off the table as they shocked her back to life. "Her pancreas was too damaged from the potassium. She's essentially a Diabetic now. She doesn't produce any insulin. Her lungs took a pretty big hit, too…she was hemorrhaging massively in them. Her doctor in the States said they were healing extremely well, but with her jumping climates and running in this cold on top of her previous wound…Her kidneys, heart, liver…pretty much everything sustained some type of damage... but she's been really healthy up until last night…this morning really." Jack took a seat on the opposite side of the bed, feeling Dmitri' s eyes boring into him from across the room.

Alexei sat softly by Irina and Jack studied his face as the doctor examined Irina, his moving of her arms and touching her face not even stirring her from her slumber. "Irina." He called out to her softly, "Irina, my dear, please wake up." He brushed the back of his old soft hands against her cheek, her skin sizzling to the touch.

"She can't seem to keep her eyes open." Jack added softly as Alexei's eyebrows furrowed.

"That's from the fever." He responded, calling out to Irina again. "Irina." He called louder, gently shaking her.

Her eyes fluttered open and she smiled softly seeing Alexei's face over hers. "Hello Alexei."  
She croaked out and both older men were alarmed having never heard her like this.

"You're very sick, Irina." Alexei, got his light out of his bag. "What on Earth have you been doing?"  
He asked and Jack flushed red. "I heard you've had quite the time these last few months. That once again you crept past deaths' door." He shook his head in disappointment out of worry. "And you had your beautiful baby." He finally smiled down at her getting a smile out of Irina as well. "She's absolutely perfect."

Alexei smiled over at Jack as he patted the baby's back, looking for a burp.

"I'm going to flash a light in your eyes. It's bright, and I'm sorry…but I have to. Ok?" He cupped her cheek, feeling her nod slightly and held open her eyes, instructing her to follow the light where he moved it. He took her blood pressure and listened to her heart and lungs, which made him grimace. "Irina, you are not 'Wonder Woman' no matter how incredible you are…you cannot speed up your healing process. Jack told me that you went running in Moscow a few days ago in the cold. Is that true?"

She nodded, 'yes' wondering how Jack knew that. 'Sydney must have ratted her out, she guessed.' "I've always gone running in the cold and its never bothered me before." She tried defending herself.

"Yes! But that was before you were shot in the lung and had it collapse! Before you had open-heart surgery! Before you survived lethal injection! Before you had massive hemorrhaging in them!" His tone was growing louder and Irina was a little stunned, having never heard him quit so boisterous. Nor had she known that he knew about the Execution. "You have fluid in your lungs right now…pleurisy and its very serious. Your heart has a murmur from the stress its under and I'm very concerned that you don't realize how serious this can be… You must slow down!"He exaggerated every word of his last command, taking hold of her hands and giving them a good squeeze. "Running outside in the winter in Russia, is no longer an option. Your lung tissue is much too fragile. Understood?!" He waited for her to respond, adding after her nod, "Now you should be in the hospital…but knowing you how I do, that's not an option. So, here's the deal. You must rest as much as possible and I don't want you leaving this bed unless absolutely necessary, understood?!" He again waited for her confirmation.

"Now, I am going to put you on some heavy-duty antibiotics for the next few days that should knock this out of your system. But, you will not be able to breastfeed your baby until the day after your medication is stopped."

Irina's face fell immediately, not liking that one bit.

"Just keep pumping and when you're better, she can nurse again. Ok? Don't look so sad. It's only a few days." He laughed softly.

"Am I contagious?" She rasped out, concerned for the baby and Jack.

"No. Your infection is stemming from your injuries. I imagine that when you went running in the cold, you caused your lungs to hemorrhage again. It just took a couple of days for the infection to settle in and the fluid to build up." He packed up his bag and left a bottle of antibiotics on the nightstand.

"And the heart murmur?" Jack asked concerned about that as well.

"Should go away within a day or so when her fever goes down and her lungs aren't working so hard."  
He smiled, kissing Irina's forehead and cheek before getting up from the bed. "Now, I want you to take two of these now, and two Tylenol for your fever. Then I want you to go back to sleep immediately, no arguments."

"I'll get the water." Dmitri brushed past the end of the bed on a mission to take care of his dear Tsarina.

"Your husband loves you very much." Alexei smiled, seeing the concern still all over Jack's face as he snuggled Lena into his neck. "He's very worried about you…So please be a good patient and listen to him alright?"

Irina smiled, nodding yes against her pillow.

"Now, I must hold that enchanting baby." He smiled getting up to take the baby from Jack. His old wrinkly hands held her like a pro and his face was sheer delight when Lena yawned widely as he held her in his hands. "Oh, Irina…she is so beautiful. Just like her mother and grandmother before her." He cooed as Lena threw her tiny fist into the air stretching.

"Thank you." Irina croaked again in her frog voice.

Dmitri returned with the water and helped Irina take her prescribed medicine, making sure she was comfortable when she lay back down.

"I will be back in three days to check on you." Alexei smiled, dropping another kiss to Irina's head. "Sleep well Empress." He added softly.

Jack walked him out as Dmitri went to make something for Irina to eat, drink more like it, as she hadn't yet this morning.

"Make sure Irina keeps eating! Even if she doesn't feel well enough to now." Alexei looked sternly at Jack, passing the now sleeping baby back to him. "If she doesn't get enough calories, her body will start burning her fat for energy instead, she will go into Ketoacidosis and a Diabetic coma. Do you understand, it's very important?"

"Yes." Jack shook his head, fully alert to how serious it could be.

"Lot's of liquids if she can't eat solids for a few days. Stay on top of her insulin levels even if she's sleeping." Alexei added putting on his heavy coat as Jack handed him his bag.

"What about that blue ring around her mouth?" Jack shifted nervously.

"Lack of oxygen. I didn't see it just now when I examined her but if you see it again, call me immediately."

"Ok. And Thank You Alexei." Jack thanked him profusely, feeling a little better now.

"She will be 'ok' Jack." The old man smiled seeing the distress still written across his features. "If there is one thing I know about Irina, is she's a fighter. She's stubborn." He laughed, "And that's what gets her through. She will be just fine, if, she takes care of herself. Which she usually does, despite everything else." "Da svidanya." He smiled, "If you need anything don't hesitate to call."

"Thank you and da svidanya, Alexei." Jack smiled as the older man disappeared into the blinding white snow.  
He called Sydney immediately and filled her in on what was happening with Irina, rest assured she was going to be 'ok,' Jack convinced Sydney to stay.

When the phone call was over, Jack went in search of Dmitri. He had to find out why the older man was so upset with him, though Jack had a pretty good idea after watching his reaction to hearing the details of damage Irina incurred because of the lethal injection. He found him in the kitchen making homemade chicken broth and preparing tea for Irina.

"Dmitri…" Jack walked up to opposite side of the 'L' shaped counter. "You obviously have something you want to say to me, so please just say it."

Dmitri's anger was visibly seething below the surface as he stirred the broth. "You swore to me that I wouldn't need to protect her from you." He spoke as his jaw clenched. "And while she's in your care, your country, your CIA…executes her five days after giving birth to your daughter in a prison cell! That's twice, she has narrowly survived a permanent death because of you. And now…she has permanent damage that if not taken care of properly…could kill her."

"Dmitri," Jack sighed, knowing that everything the man had said was true, his feelings warranted, "You're right. I did swear that I would protect her and I failed. That is something that I will have to live with everyday for the rest of my life." He took a deep breath and forged on. "I also realized, that it is impossible…to be able to protect the ones you love at all times from outside factors; and that is why I am fearful for Irina, my daughters, just as you are. No one person can protect them from everything that could and can hurt them. We do the best that we can, and pray for the best. We deal with the fallout if necessary. That is what Irina and I are trying to do." He waited until the older man finally relaxed a little, meeting his eyes, "I would gladly lay down my life for hers at any moment if I have the choice. Please know that she…is the most important thing in my life outside of our children and I'll spend everyday of the rest of our lives 'trying' to keep them all safe…"

Dmitri didn't answer verbally, only nodded his head slowly at acknowledging Jack's admission and accepting if for what it was.

"As a father, you must understand what its like to see your child in pain, sick, or hurting…You want to do anything and everything to keep them safe, healthy and happy…To me, Irina is 'my' child now. I can't stand to see her in pain…But I also understand what you're saying. It is impossible to protect them from everything in the world." He paused finally looking up to meet Jack's eyes, "But I'm going to die trying."

Jack smiled, and nodded at the older man. Agreeing completely.

"I'll bring her broth and tea up when its finished." He added before setting back to work.

Jack smiled at the man and let him finish his task, taking Lena back upstairs to be with Irina.

**_*Push*_**

When he opened the door, she was sound asleep again. Her hand curled up in front of her face as she snuggled into the pillow. Jack kissed her forehead and felt relieved when he her temperature had already seemed to drop some. He carefully placed Lena into her bassinet and went to finish his shower.

Dmitri had brought up her broth and tea while he was in the shower and Jack quickly dressed. He checked Irina's blood sugar and when he pricked her finger, her face only slightly reacted to the sting.

He was going to give her the shot while she slept but decided against that, as it would probably cause a horrific reaction from her remembering her hatred of needles, and nightmares about Kashmir.

He slowly stirred her awake with gentle kisses and whispers into her ear. "Irina, you have to wake up Honey. I have to give you your shot and you need to drink some broth."

She nodded she understood, but remained where she was.

"Irina." He kissed her soundly on the lips, bringing her eyes open with a smile.

"Hi." She greeted him with her raspy voice.

"Hi Sleepy Head. I need to give you this." He held up the syringe, "And you need drink some chicken broth or we'll have a repeat of last night."

"Ok." She flipped the blanket back, "In the stomach." She struggled to lift her nightgown and Jack had to help her.

Carefully, he slid the needle into the upper portion of her abdominals and then helped her get settled again, propping her up against the headboard and pillows.

"Thank you." She whispered as he tucked her hair behind her ear. Her movements had brought on another coughing fit and Jack rubbed her back, feeling the pain with her when he saw her wince and hold her clenched fist to her chest.

When she could breath again, he helped her take a few sips of the broth and then the tea through a straw.

When she was finished he helped her slide back down into bed, sitting beside her for a moment to just look at her as he stroked her Chestnut waves over her shoulder. She found his hand and wrapped his fingers into hers.

Turning her head slowly to look at him she used her free hand to curl her pointer finger asking him to come closer…and closer and closer until his lips were on hers. Exactly what she wanted.

"I love you…so much." She smiled, brushing his face with her fingers before closing her eyes again.

"I love you." He kissed the corner of her mouth again with a took the tray down to the kitchen and realized scouring the freezer that they were going to need formula to help them get through the next few days and called Alexei to find out which kind would be best to make the transitions easiest.

With the information in hand, and Dmitri's word he wouldn't leave Irina or Lena's sides, Jack set out for the store. When he returned an hour later, he headed straight up to Irina's room and stopped dead in his tracks, face ashen when he saw the man standing over Irina watching her sleep and holding their baby in his arms.

Jack was afraid to move, the intruder hadn't seen him and he quickly stepped back into the hallway, plastering himself up against the wall in shock.

Thinking rapidly of what to do…finally taking a calming breath he peered around the edge of the door and gasped when he saw the man had sat on the edge of the bed and was now leaning over, kissing Irina as she slept.

Jack instantly flew into the door and the man's face flashed in surprise as he jolted off the bed and backed away slowly, holding Lena to his chest. Familiar, haunting eyes staring straight at Jack as he slowly walked toward the bed unable to breathe in the silent stand-off.

"Jack?" His deep voice finally whispered.

"You're alive." Jack answered in his own disbelief, taking in the disheveled appearance of the ghost before him; steely gray hair not that much different then his own and the scruffy beard covering his chin. His clothes like that of a peasant. He'd seen the hollow look in this man's eyes now, in Irina's after her time in solitary…after she'd been broken. "How…Irina told me you were dead?" Jack swallowed the lump in his throat, not wanting to believe she would lie to him. 'Mikhail was alive.'

"She doesn't know. She believes I am dead…everyone does." He answered softly in a thickly accented English, looking at Irina asleep in the bed. "I died twenty-three years ago…when I left my family…when I left her in that Godforsaken place." His eyes started fill to with unshed tears as he watched Irina sleep.

Jack saw the broken man before him begin to crumble with his reference of leaving Irina behind in Kashmir. It was then that Jack noticed the wooden cane leaning against the nightstand.

"Dmitri said she's very sick…" He took a few steps towards Irina in the bed again and Jack noticed his rigid steps walking with a stiff leg.

"Yes." Jack's chest felt heavy and his mind was rapidly filling with confusion and panic as he watched Mikhail tenderly brush the hair off Irina's forehead with his fingers, a small smile gracing his strong features.

"She is still…so beautiful." He turned his smiled to Jack, "As is your new baby." Mikhail ran his weathered fingers down Lena's tiny arm causing her to pull her arm closer to her body in her sleep. "She has her baby." His eyes began filling again with unshed tears thinking about the horrors he witnessed the first day Irina was brought to the prison. When Cuvee had discovered she was pregnant with Jack's child and beat it out of her…and all the others.

Jack knew by the look on the man's face what he was thinking about, 'their lost baby...' And he remembered the footage that Marshall had frozen of Mikhail's reaction to what was happening to Irina.

Here was a man who'd witnessed her 'hell'…went through it with her, something that only 'they' shared, something that would bond them, forever.

Irina began stirring in her sleep and Jack moved immediately to her side as Mikhail backed into the dark corner at the end of the room.

The small sounds she was making and the way her face was moving let Jack know she must have been dreaming. He leaned closer to her ear and whispered softly, "Shhhh…" Running his hand over the back of her head, smoothing her hair and lulling her back to her deep sleep. He placed his cheek to her forehead and noticed she still felt quite warm. She needed to sleep.

Mikhail watched from the other side of the room at Jack's tender gestures and words, his obvious love for Irina and he smiled. He remembered their talks in prison, her worry that Jack would hate her forever when he learned of her betrayal. Believing everything they'd shared to be only a manipulation when in reality, she really had loved him.

Jack placed a kiss to her temple and pulled the blanket up around her shoulders. As he stood he paused briefly, looking at the man in the shadows holding his baby. He picked up the hand-carved wooden cane and walked slowly towards Mikhail.

Standing within a foot of the living ghost, he took his baby from the man's arms and gave him his cane with a nod. "Let's let her sleep." He motioned for Mikhail to follow him. "We need to talk."

The two men made their way out of Irina's room and quietly shut the door behind them. Jack waited patiently as Mikhail maneuvered the long staircase with his stiff leg and cane and wondered what had happened, 'was it a result of the landmine?'

Jack guided them into the library and waited for Mikhail to take his seat before pressing the button on Irina's desk, ringing for Dmitri.

"Would you like some coffee? Tea?" Jack asked in a cracked voice, then looking at the thin man before him, "Something to eat?"

"Tea and a sandwich would be wonderful. Thank you." Mikhail shifted nervously on the end of the couch, feeling awkward and very nervous as Jack asked Dmitri to bring the items to them. He then noticed the photograph on the end table next to him, picking it up with a smile.

It was the one Katya had taken of a pregnant Irina and Sydney in the garden after their 'reunion' and before Sydney left for the States again. Irina looked so happy with her daughter's arms around her, bright smiles on both of their faces and Mikhail smiled, thinking of his own son.

"Sydney?" He showed the photo to Jack as he took a seat across from him, asking, though he already knew he was correct, that the beautiful young woman was Irina's long lost daughter.

"Yes." Jack answered with a nod, adjusting Lena so that she was sleeping against his chest.

"She's very beautiful. Just as Irina said." He smiled. "They look very happy."

"It was taken a few days after we finally learned the 'truth' about Irina. The night 'your son' sat where you are now…asking her about your life and death." He said flatly, trying not to get angry with the man before, knowing that as with Irina, nothing was always as it seems. There had to be a reason, just as with her, that this man would not find his family not let the ones who loved him know, that he was still alive.

"My son?"

Jack saw the brief flash of sadness cross the man's face as he set the photo down.

"Michael was here? You know Michael?" He asked quietly, looking at Jack.

"He works with me, with my daughter, at the CIA." Jack felt his mouth getting dry thinking about Vaughn's reaction when he learned his father was still alive. "He wanted to be like his father…"

Mikhail didn't say anything, only looked away as if ashamed, "How is he? He must be a grown man now…I only remember the little boy with the baseball hat, and big smile." He smiled sadly thinking about all that he'd missed.

"He's fine." Jack was struggling to talk realizing the man hadn't had the obvious 'spies' that Irina had, to keep track of Sydney with photographs. He remembered Irina telling them how Vaughn's father had survived his days in Kashmir by imagining his son playing baseball. That was the memory, he still held onto.

"Vaughn is a good man. He's dating our daughter." He added with a small smile seeing a flicker of light flash in Mikhail's eyes with a smile.

"Irina's Sydney…and my Michael." He smiled at the thought and shook his head in disbelief.

"Where have you been all this time? Why haven't you told anyone…Irina, your family…that you're alive?" Jack finally braved the tough questions.

Mikhail sighed and sat back, "I was ashamed." He finally choked out, struggling with his own admission. "At first, for who I really was…for leaving my family. For not succeeding in getting back to them." He paused, staring at some blank spot on the floor, "And then for being a coward…for leaving Rina there…" His voice cracked and he paused again. "I'd wished I'd died for a long time after that. Wished that the landmine had killed me instead of just taking my leg." He lifted his pant leg and knocked on the prosthetic limb with his cane. "I couldn't go home. The KGB would have killed my family here in Russia if they found them hiding a fugitive; and how could I tell them of my escape…tell them I'd left Rina behind to be slowly tortured to death? What kind of man would that make me?" He shook his head in disgust. "I couldn't go back…So I went to Siberia. I cut myself off from everything, everyone. Living in solitude on a small farm. When the Soviet Union finally fell, many years had passed…There was no way I could go home to my Bella, my Michael." His eyes started tearing again and he blinked them back, refusing to cry. "I thought for certain, that Rina had died in Kashmir…It wasn't until recently, that I learned she hadn't." He reached inside his worn coat and brought out a rolled magazine, handing it to Jack. "I went into the city, to buy supplies to make it through the winter. I was at the market when I saw her beautiful face staring back me. Those same big brown eyes…She was alive…" He had difficulty keeping himself together. "And she'd found her family…"

Jack looked at the Russian magazine. A recent photo of Irina graced the cover with the headline title, 'Mother Russia' subtitled with the questions of 'Imperial Russia?' and 'Why Russians Want Their Tsar.' Her story of survival of imprisonment for treason was a featured article as well as the apparent lives of Jack, Sydney and Katya.

"I couldn't believe what I was seeing. She was healthy, and alive…Reading the articles about how she'd been revealed as Anastasia's daughter and that she'd actually taken back the government. 'Mother Russia."

His eyebrows raised in disbelief, shaking his head as Jack continued to stare at the photo of his beautiful wife.

"And I read the story, about her imprisonment and that she'd survived…was 'successfully re-educated' as the KGB used to say. I knew they must have broken her. That is how she was still alive. But after all this time, she'd found her family." He turned his eyes back to Jack. "She loved you so much, Jack. I knew, from the first moment I saw her in the US…do you remember that night in Washington?"

"Yes." Jack nodded, "Irina told us, but yes, I remember."

"I was so worried for her, she was so young and I was terrified of what the KGB would do if they knew just how much in love she was with her 'mark." He answered honestly. "I knew she was headed for trouble." He paused again, wringing his hands. "The day they drug her down that aisle…Helplessly watching what that monster did to her because of 'that love…" He couldn't continue thinking about it and had to look away from Jack, quickly wiping a fallen tear.

"Why now?" Jack asked softly. "After all this time?"

"Finding out Rina was alive… That she was 'brave' enough to take back her life, find her family. Knowing that you forgave her when you learned the truth…I had to come back." He sighed, "I have to face my past. I want to know my son. I miss my wife. No matter what they think of me now, they must know, how much l love them. I never wanted to leave. I just have to see them…I had to see Rina. She's the only reason I am still 'alive.'" He felt uncomfortable under Jack's scrutinizing gaze. Dmitri entered carrying a tray of tea and sandwiches, obvious to Jack that he too, was in shock over the man sitting on the couch.

"Thank you, Dmitri." Mikhail clasped the older man's hand with a warm smile.

"It is so good to see you again." Dmitri nodded still stunned. "Have you seen your mother? Your brother? Do they know you're alive?" He asked softly handing Mikhail a cup of tea.

"My mother is still alive?!" Mikhail sighed in relief with bright eyes as Dmitri nodded she was. "No…no they don't know. I just…got on a train and found myself here first. I guess I had to see Rina first…She was the last of my family that I saw."

"When she knows…You're alive Mikhail," Dmitri looked from him to Jack, sharing a knowing look. "She will be so happy but I don't know if her heart can take that now."

Mikhail's eyes instantly flashed with concern and Jack felt the twinge of jealousy tug at his heart. "What happened to her heart?" He looked between Jack and Dmitri.

"She was shot a few months ago, in the chest. And just recently survived Execution. She has an infection right now." Jack answered calmly, seeing the man's eyebrows shoot up.

"Shot? Executed?" Mikhail jolted to the front of the sofa where he sat, anger and panic below the surface.

"She was shot by Gerard Cuvee." Jack saw the instant hatred well in the Mikhail's eyes at the mentioning of the man's name and that he'd hurt Irina, again. "She was executed by the US government for her past crimes of espionage…one of the counts against her," His eyes narrowed trying to keep his anger at bay, "Was for murdering a CIA officer Bill Vaughn."

Jack heard the immediate intake of sharp breath come from Mikhail.

"Oh God..." He put his head in his hands. "How…how did she survive?" He finally looked up into Jack's dark eyes.

"My daughter and your son," He waited for the reaction from Mikhail he knew would be there, "Broke into the White House, and convinced the President that Irina never murdered any CIA agents…they were actually KGB. Told him that she was the real force behind the Russian Government and that he needed to speak with President Putin about her, before sentencing her to die for crimes she didn't commit." He paused briefly letting the information digest in Mikhail's mind, which he saw was racing. "They got to him, and Putin confirmed what they'd told him. Irina was spared at the last minute by Diplomatic Immunity for being the real Russian Ruler. Which is why everyone knows she's 'the Romanov' now. Outing her was the only way to save her."

"My son? He did that for Rina?" Mikhail was in absolute shock.

"He would do anything for my daughter. He loves her very much." Jack finally admitted out loud what he knew to be true. "Irina has saved Vaughn's life, and he has saved hers. They have formed a bond, not only because of our daughter Sydney but because of their connection to you." Jack met the man's eyes, trying to convey just how important his life has meant to those he left behind. "They've shared in their grief of losing you. Irina is his connection to you as he is for her."

Mikhail's tears spilled down his cheeks and he brushed them away with his rough hands hearing about how his best friend and son forged a bond over their 'love' for him.

"He will be here tomorrow." Jack offered after a moment of silence.

"Michael?" Mikhail's eyes snapped to Jack's.

"Yes. We are baptizing Lena tomorrow evening," Jack ran his thumb over Lena's cheek as he held her tiny head against his chest, "He is one of her Godfathers."

"My son, here tomorrow." Mikhail shook his head in disbelief.

"Will you stay? Face your son?" Jack asked stoically, seeing the hesitation in Mikhail's eyes.

"Yes." He answered slowly. "It is time."

"You can stay in one of the rooms upstairs..." Jack stood, feeling a wide variety of mixed emotions about the man in front of him.

"Do you need anything?" He asked not seeing an overnight bag anywhere.

"Yes…actually. I have nothing. I just got on the train immediately after seeing Irina's face…" Mikhail stood and Jack could see him wince as he straightened his leg. The urgency this man felt to see Irina; that he'd just get on a train and travel across Siberia…overwhelming Jack.

"I'll find you something of mine to wear until Dmitri can buy you some things. Is that ok?" Jack asked a little nervously, having never offered another man use of his clothes.

"Yes, I appreciate that. Thank You Jack." Mikhail offered his hand and Jack accepted. When they were walking out of the library Mikhail asked, "Jack…can I ask you something?"

"Yes." Jack instantly felt nervous.

"What was it like…for you to find out she was alive? To see her for the first time?" He wondered thinking about his own reunion with her and his family.

Jack was quiet a moment as they made their way up the stairs towards one of the vacant bedrooms.

"Disbelief… Relieved… Overjoyed… Betrayed… Angry…Hate…and when I first saw her… The same love I'd felt before, I knew who she really was. It's been very hard…on all of us. Took us a long time to get where we are today. We still have issues…but we still, love each other and everything else falls behind that."

Mikhail nodded in understanding. "I know its not going to be easy…but I can't live without them anymore. If Rina has found a way…I will find a way too."

Jack showed him to a room far down the hall, at the other end of the palace so he'd have privacy and unsure how they were going to handle the 'reunion' tomorrow.

"I'll bring you the clothes and you should find everything else you need in the bathroom."

Jack stood by the door and watched as Mikhail looked around.

"Thank you."

"I'll be back with some clothes in a few minutes. I'll just leave them on the bed if you're still in the shower."

"Ok." He offered a small smile. "And 'Thank You' again…for this hospitality."

Jack just nodded and slipped out the door. He went back to Irina's room and she was still fast asleep.

Lena was too and Jack laid her gently into her bassinet before rummaging around in the closet for some to the new clothes that Irina had bought for him to use while he was there.

He managed to find a few articles and while he was busy deciding which pair of pajama bottoms to give to the man, he heard Irina stirring.

"Jack…" Her raspy voice croaked out.

He quickly set the items on the dresser and went to her side.

"Hey Beautiful. How are you feeling?" He kissed her lightly with a smile, relieved to feel that her fever had gone down extensively with the new medication and Tylenol.


	32. Chapter 32

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on Repeat): Don't Let Go by Sarah McLachlan, Via Con Me by Paulo Conte**_

* * *

THIRTY-TWO

o

"Better. What time is it?" Irina looked around groggy.

"Almost 8 PM." He smiled smoothing her hair. "You've been asleep almost the entire day. That's good."

"How's Lena?" She looked over to where her baby was probably sleeping.

"Sleeping like the angel she is." He ran his thumb over her cheek wondering how she was going to react to finding out that Mikhail was alive…and just a few doors done. He didn't think telling her now, was a good idea.

"Will you please bring her to me?" She asked with her big brown doe eyes that melted Jack. "I miss her."

"Of course." He went the bassinet and carefully lifted his sleeping child into his arms and smiled when she made a squeak and grunting noise at being disturbed.

"She's missed you, too. The bottle 'ain't nothin' like her Mama." He smiled and Irina laughed slightly as he placed the baby into her embrace.

She immediately lit up and Jack was relieved to see her eyes open. Irina was whispering softly into Lena's ear and the baby turned her face into Irina's snuggling against her cheek and warm breath.

"I was having the strangest dream… It seemed so real." Irina's brows furrowed after a moment trying to clear the fog in her head.

"About what?" Jack asked, running his hand over Irina's hair and down her back.

"It was so strange…so real. Mikhail was alive…he was here." She closed her eyes, shaking her head softly thinking about it. "I could hear his voice and he…was standing over me. In this room holding Lena…It was so real." She sighed and Jack's heart felt like it stopped in his chest. He didn't know what to say, if he should say anything. Thankfully, Irina moved on. "Jack, you're going to have to give her a bath tonight? Are you 'ok' with that?" She opened her eyes, looking into his. "You'll do fine, I promise." She smiled, knowing how nervous he was to do it alone. It had been forever since he bathed Sydney as an infant and he'd only bathed Lena, with Irina and her supervision.

"Ok." Jack nodded, feeling a bit nervous but up to the challenge. "Where are her clothes?" He looked around the room, having not seen Irina actually get them out and change the baby while he was here.

"They're in her nursery, next door." Irina smiled sleepily, playing with the long soft hair on Lena's neck. "Her sleepers are in the second drawer of changing table, and diapers are in the first. Make sure she has a Onesie on under the sleeper or she'll get too cold. I usually get everything first and bring it into the bathroom with us. That way she doesn't get cold going from one room to the next."

Jack smiled at another example of how wonderful of a mother she was... when given the chance. "She has a nursery here?" He asked smiling in wonder.

"Yes…I can't wait until she's old enough to start sleeping in it. It's so beautiful Jack. Illiyah did an 'amazing' job." She smiled softly, as the baby wrapped her tiny fingers around her pinkie.

Jack was intrigued but still his mind was wondering to the man down the hall and how he was going to reveal him to Irina, and when.

"What's wrong Jack?" She reached up to gently turn his face to look at her. "You seem distracted by something…It's not Sydney is it?" Her fears rising within at the thought something had happened.

Jack was amazed by her perception at reading him and thought quickly of how to respond. "Sydney's fine and having fun in Paris." He smiled. "Apparently, she and Vaughn's mother have hit-it-off fairly well. She's worried about you though. She wanted to fly here today but I told her you'd be upset if she cut short her trip to watch you sleep."  
He smiled teasing, dropping a kiss to her cheek.

"Yes, I would have. 'Thank You' for convincing her to stay." Irina smiled warmly, lacing her fingers with his.

"Are you hungry? You should eat something now. I'll make you something, bring you up some more broth and juice maybe." He dropped his mouth to hers, kissing her softly as he retreated from the bed. "Are you 'ok' with Lena here?" He asked concerned seeing how weak she still was.

"Yes. We'll be fine." She smiled wrapping her arms around the baby more securely as they lay on their sides.

Jack nodded and was 'Thankful' she was facing away from the door so she wouldn't see him taking the clothing out of the room and start asking questions.

He knocked softly on Mikhail's door and heard a faint, "Come in."

When he opened the door, Jack was amazed at the transformation of the man before him. Mikhail had trimmed his hair up, and shaved his beard off. It was glaringly obvious just how much his son took after him.

"I cleaned up." He smiled shyly sitting on the bed in nothing but a towel around his waist. "I don't want to frighten them with my appearance."

Despite his light frame, Mikhail's body was well toned and held many scars like Irina's. Many, Jack assumed, were from the landmine explosion. He'd lost his leg from the knee down and a smooth stump was all that remained.

"I hope these will fit. Irina just bought them for me, so they're brand new." Jack held out the stack of clothing to the man. When he reached up to take them from him, Jack's eyes instantly flashed to the faint blue tattoo on his forearm. His identification number from Kashmir.

"My identification number." Mikhail followed Jack's gaze, holding his arm up to look at it. "You've seen Rina's I take it?"

Jack nodded slowly he had, "But hers'…isn't on her arm…" His eyebrows furrowed again in thought.

"That's because Gerard Cuvee is a monster." Mikhail replied quietly through pursed lips. "He wanted Rina's to be…in his own 'special' place." He shook his head disgusted. "His own brand on her body. Marking her like his property. I'll be right back." He nodded 'Thanks' again and hopped up, grabbed his cane and disappeared with the clothing into the bathroom.

He didn't need to explain any further, Jack understood. Cuvee wanted 'it' where he could see it. The placement of Irina's tattoo was chosen for his own sexual reasons. Marking her like his own personal 'whore.' Some place he could look at it while he... The thought made Jack want to vomit.

"How much has she told you…of her time there?" Mikhail asked softly when he emerged a couple minutes later.

"Quite a bit. All very disturbing." Jack sighed, crossing his arms over his chest as they walked out of the room. "The KGB taped…a great deal of it."

"I remember." Mikhail's voice hardened. "Like it was their own personal entertainment. Bastards…"

Jack motioned for them to be quiet as they passed Irina's door, not wanting her to hear Jack talking to someone and especially not the man's voice she was sure to recognize.

When they were safely a distance away and walking through the library, Mikhail began talking again.

"She was so brave…She fought them. Every time. She fought them." He spoke softly remembering and Jack felt his heart tense. "Do you know what happened to her…after our escape?" He asked softly, taking a seat on the stool watching Jack get things down from the cupboards.

Jack nodded, "Yes." Unsure if it was his place to tell. "She was beaten…put in solitary." He paused placing the cup on the tray to look the man in eyes. "For ten months."

"Oh my God…" Mikhail's head fell to his hands again, rubbing his eyes as if trying to erase the truth. "Ten months…" He suddenly became quiet.

Jack continued to make Irina something to eat as the uncomfortable silence settled in.

"I think I'm going to go rest now." Mikhail suddenly stood and looked at Jack briefly, obviously upset.

"Do you want something to eat for dinner?" Jack asked, as the man was about to disappear around the corner.

"I don't really think I could eat right now. But 'Thank You.'" He replied quietly and was gone.

Jack finished his task and decided to make Lena a bottle as she was bound to be hungry as well. When he had everything ready, he made his way back upstairs. He could hear Lena crying the closer he got, the louder it became.

When he opened the door, Irina was trying to calm the baby down but was unsuccessful. Lena kept trying to nuzzle her way to dinner and was angry beyond belief she was met by a wet satin nightgown instead of the warm flesh she was used to; Irina's body instinctively reacting to her child's cries.

Irina had tears in her eyes again as Lena's tears rolled off her angry red cheeks. Her little fists clenches at the end of rigid arms, snorting with rage, not understanding 'what the hell was going on,' or why her mother was pushing her away.

Jack immediately handed Irina the bottle and once again, it took quite sometime to calm the baby down enough to get her to eat. Her tears kept rolling as she looked up at Irina, her little body still jerking every other uneven breath, the hiccups returned.

"I hate this." Irina wiped the tear tracks on her own face, looking down at her distraught daughter. "I hate this." She repeated, laying her cheek against Lena's.

"It's only for a couple days." Jack tried to reassure her, 'this too shall pass.' He hated it too as he couldn't stand to see them both so upset.

Irina suddenly turned her head away and broke into a fit of deep coughs, scaring Lena who went rigid and stopped eating, her face instantly scrunching up, bottom lip out and about to scream.

"Shhhh." Irina turned back as soon as it was over, trying to calm the baby once again. "I'm sorry." She kept repeating in a whisper but it wasn't helping. Finally she started humming, something Jack was very familiar with now, 'The Russian Lullaby' and Lena began to quiet down and eat again.

He decided to take the opportunity to get Lena's things from her nursery to give her a bath. He opened the door and without even turning on the lights, he knew it was spectacular from just what he could see by the moonlight cascading through the balcony windows and domed skylight; every bright star in the Northern sky shown down through that window.

When he hit the light, the soft glow of the room mesmerized him. The ceiling was painted with enchanting fairies; toy chests and stuffed animals everywhere on the floor. A rocking chair and rocking horse sat off to one side. A tiny table and chairs with a perfect little tea set already arranged was off to the other.

The large round circular crib sat center of the room covered by a delicate sheer domed drape. The mobile at its center, made of exquisite hand painted fairies and flowers. A giant bookcase of drawers and shelves was built into the entire length of one wall and tiny lights illuminated delicate Faberge eggs that Jack guessed were from the Imperial collection.

Glass figurines, framed photos and hundreds of books, filled the rest of the shelves. The whole room was like being in a fairytale, as if he'd stepped into a magical time warp. 'Simply stunning.'

He saw the changing table Irina was referring to and found everything he was looking for. As he closed the door, Jack smiled thinking about how much fun his 'little girl' was going to have in that room some day.

After helping Irina take her insulin and eat, she was exhausted and ready for sleep again.

"Jack, I need another nightgown." She looked down at her wet chest and back up to his eyes, "Please."

He smiled at her predicament, wanting to laugh but knowing that wouldn't be very nice. Rummaging around in her drawer, he found a beautiful little satin nightgown like she'd been wearing the night they'd 'found' her. His mind flashing back to that moment he looked up and saw the Goddess at the top of the staircase. It then rapidly flashed to her pulling it off over her head a couple of hours later.

"What are you smiling about?" Irina asked seeing the enormous grin on Jack's face when he walked back over to the bed.

"Just remembering the first amazing night we spent together in this bed." He held up the nightgown and her smiled matched his, causing her to laugh and then cough again.

"Stop making me laugh." She scolded when her coughing spell was finally over. "It's too painful."

He helped her out of her old gown and into the new one before gathering up Lena to give her a bath. Jack had to smile as Lena fell asleep the minute she hit the warm water.

'Must remind her of home.' Jack laughed thinking about life inside a mother's womb. Twenty minutes later, Jack brought the wonderful smelling baby back into the bedroom and laid her beside Irina in the middle of their bed. Both sound asleep when he turned the lights down before heading to the kitchen to get himself something to eat.

Irina awoke a half hour later, startled from sleep by a nightmare. Turning over onto her other side she smiled when she saw her beautiful baby sleeping peacefully beside her. Irina maneuvered herself closer to Lena and inhaled her fresh baby scent as she snuggled up beside her. She pulled the baby's blankets up around her again as Lena had wiggled out of them and realized when she held her tiny foot, it was freezing. Not about to let her baby be cold, Irina, with much effort, sat upright in bed and moved to stand. Steadying herself before she began walking to the nursery, holding onto the bed, then dresser, door and wall as her guide.

Jack was immediately alarmed when he entered their room and Irina wasn't in bed. His heart quickened its pace when he realized she wasn't in the bathroom and was on the verge of panic when she walked back through the door holding two tiny socks.

Her complexion was incredibly pale and she looked exhausted.

"Irina, what in the hell are you doing out of bed?" He was at her side in an instant, wrapping his arm around her waist about to pick her up, when she put her hand on his chest to stop him.

"I had to get Lena some socks…her feet are freezing." She had a far off look in her eye as she held the tiny objects in her hand. "Jack…I think I just saw a ghost." She turned her eyes to look into his, finding it difficult to swallow. "I…I was coming out of the …the nursery and…Jack, I swear I just saw…You're going to think I'm hallucinating again…Maybe I am?" She pinched her forehead with her hand before looking at him again. "I swear I just saw Mikhail going into the far bedroom."

"Irina," Jack took a deep breath knowing he had to tell her, "Come here and sit with me." He tried to guide her over to the bed.

"Jack…What's going on? Am I delirious? I mean first the dream and now…" She croaked out in her frog voice.

"Hello Rina." A familiar voice came from behind them and Jack felt her freeze instantly, her muscles completely rigid.

Slowly, she turned in his arms. "Oh dear God," She whispered staring back at the man she thought dead, and Jack had to catch her as she swayed about to pass out.

"Bu..but you're… dead." She finally got out and Jack felt her go limp in his arms.

"Irina!" He instantly swept her into his arms, carrying her over to the bed in flash, concern all over his face. Mikhail followed right behind, just as concerned hearing earlier about her fragile heart.

"I'm sorry Jack, its just I knew she saw me…" He tried apologizing as Jack tried to rouse Irina. "I didn't mean to scare her to death…Poor choice of words." He added when Jack's eyes flashed to his.

"Irina…Come on 'My Love.' Open your eyes." Jack cupped her face and ran his hands over her cheeks and hair, gently shaking her as she sat propped up against the headboard and pillows. "Irina…"

Slowly, her eyes began to flutter and then open; a slight moment of confusion before she remembered and then her eyes went wide looking at Mikhail over Jack's shoulder.

She sat unmoving, holding her breath as her eyes locked onto Mikhail's.

Jack slowly backed up and watched the interaction between the two.

"Rina," Mikhail finally spoke again softly in Russian. "It's ok. It's really me. Mikhail…"

She remained frozen staring at him in disbelief and still unsure if she was hallucinating.

Jack saw her small, but sharp, intake of breath as Mikhail walked towards her slowly, her eyes widening further.

When he reached the side of the bed, he called out to her again, hand extended. "Rina, It's ok. It's really me, you're not imagining it my beautiful girl."

When he smiled she launched herself off bed and into his arms, almost knocking him over; her arms going tightly around his neck as he engulfed her into his own embrace, lifting her feet right off the floor as he buried his face into her hair, both of them crying.

"You're alive…you're alive…" She kept repeating into his neck, holding on for dear life.

"Yes!" He chanted back to her.

Suddenly she pulled back to look at his face, staring into his eyes momentarily before she cupped it and showered it, and his mouth with kisses, smiling as Mikhail began to laugh.

"You're alive!" She pulled back again to look into his eyes, searching. Irina couldn't believe what she was seeing. She was in shock, she could hardly breathe. So many questions were racing through her mind as she looked into the man's eyes before her. Her heart was pounding in her chest as she felt his arms around her. 'He is alive!' She kept thinking, and 'He's here right now in front of me!'

"Yes! And so are you!" He smiled, still holding her in the air, tightly against his body. "I didn't know you were alive either!" He smiled and then showered her with kisses in much the same way.

Jack felt slightly out of place and wasn't sure how he was supposed to be feeling or what he should or shouldn't be doing, so he just stayed perfectly still. His emotions were all over the place.

Part of him was elated seeing Irina so happy and smiling to have her friend back from the dead… but he couldn't help but feel jealousy rise within him at their apparent special bond. He knew Irina loved him of that he was sure.

But she shared a bond uniquely 'theirs' with this man. He had come to terms with that when Mikhail had been a 'ghost,' a memory she held in her heart. But the ghost was now alive and standing in front of him holding onto Irina like she was his life raft and he wasn't sure of how that was going to affect his own 'fragile' new relationship with her.

Mikhail finally set Irina back on her feet but held her just as close until she started another coughing fit.

When it was over, she seemed to remember that Jack was in the room and locked eyes with him.

"I'll leave the two of you alone." He said quietly, moving around to the other side of the bed where he scooped up Lena. "I know you have a lot of catching up to do." He found Irina's eyes and tried to give her a small smile as he backed out the doorway.

"Jack…wait!" She called out suddenly in her deep rasp, "Lena's socks…" She held the tiny booties now crunched in her fists out to him.

He walked slowly back over to her, and stretching his arm out as far as he could to maintain as much distance as he could between him and 'them' he took the socks from her. He wasn't sure 'why' he did that or felt that way but, he felt like he was the intruder on 'their' relationship at the moment. That he didn't belong.

"Thank you," Irina clasped his outstretched fingers in hers as they passed the socks between them, holding onto him a moment longer until he looked her in the eye. She saw his reaction and wanted him to see her message of, 'I love you…don't forget, I love you…' just as she had in Panama. "Thank you." She voiced verbally and gave him a smile.

Jack, nodded, repeating the mantra in his head as he walked out the door, watching as Mikhail helped her back into bed…'She loves you, she loves you, prove that you trust her, prove that you trust her, she loves you, trust her, she loves you, trust her.' When he hit the top of the stairs Jack internally admonished himself for being selfish and having thoughts of, 'Why now? Why did he have to come back, here, to my wife…now?' After all it's taken us to get this far? This weekend… he has to come 'back to life' this weekend…' When he reached the library, he saw wet bar in the corner and thought briefly about pouring himself something strong, looking at the baby in his arms, and remembering how badly it ended last time, he passed it on by.

Dmitri was in the kitchen cleaning up before going to bed when Jack walked in, scowl on his face and furrowed eyebrows. He nuzzled Lena's head against his cheek as he poured himself a cup of chamomile tea, opting for something calming and soothing.

Dmitri watched him curiously for a moment.

"She knows doesn't she..." He asked once he realized what would put Jack in such an upset mood.

"Yes." Jack answered tersely, placing the kettle back on the stove. "They're talking upstairs now… She saw him in the hallway."

"How did she react?" Dmitri held his breath.

"At first she thought she was hallucinating, seeing a ghost and then when he spoke to her, she fainted." Jack's eyes met the older man's and saw his concern. "When she came around… I still don't think she believed what she as seeing until he walked towards her and then…"

"And then' what?" Dmitri asked when Jack didn't finish.

"She launched herself into his arms." He added quietly, rubbing his hand over Lena's back seeking comfort in her tiny presence.

"They were very close…" Dmitri folded the towel and set it on the counter, speaking softly, seeing how upset Jack was and realizing this was a difficult situation. "He was her best friend…for as long as I can remember. It was always the two of them from the time they were very little."

"Is this supposed to help me feel better about the situation?" Jack continued to stir his tea into oblivion thinking about 'best friend' and 'always the two of them.'

"I'm not telling you this to make you worry…or feel badly. I don't think you have anything to worry about, honestly. She obviously loves you…very, very much." He offered a small smile to Jack for the first time since he arrived. "I'm telling you this…to help you understand their connection. They went through a lot together. She loves him, but not in the way… she loves you. Trust me." Dmitri clasped Jack's shoulder, squeezing it as he made his way out of the kitchen.

'Trust.' There was that 'trust' word again. Jack knew that this was going to be the first real test of proving he trusted in Irina, trusted and believed in their love. He gathered up his tea and headed for the modernized family room off of the library. Intent on distracting himself from what was going on upstairs.

Mindless Russian game shows and Rocky IV on the massive plasma screen occupied his time over the next three hours.  
He avoided all news networks as they were running features of his and Irina's lives, her execution mostly, it had been confirmed by the US government now to be true.

A prison guard who witnessed that terrible day had sold the story apparently to one of the magazines and television networks; giving graphic details and even supplying them with still photos from security tapes inside her cell and of Irina walking to her death. They flashed those photos on the screen continuously and Jack felt his blood run cold remembering very vividly watching the woman he loved die a horrible death that day and all it took to bring her back.

He had finished Lena's midnight feeding and the both of them had fallen asleep lying on the couch, waiting.

Irina and Mikhail had recounted most of their lives over the last twenty years, filling each other in on their lives and talking about their time in prison.

Mikhail had kissed her 'goodnight' over an hour ago and gone back to his own room to sleep.

Now Irina was struggling to stay awake, waiting for Jack to come to bed. She didn't want to fall asleep without him and decided she would go find him.

_***Don't Let Go***_

Slowly, she made her way down the stairs in the dark and found him asleep on the couch with Lena on his chest, his hand protectively covering her back. The sight of them made her smile and she felt so blessed to have them in her life after rehashing her insane life with Mikhail over the last few hours. Slowly, she sat on the edge of the couch and bent over, kissing Jack on the lips to wake him.

His eyes flew open instantly and were greeted to her sleepy smile. "Irina, what are you doing down here?" He was instantly concerned that she'd traveled this far from her bed. "You promised Alexei you'd stay put!" He tried to sit up without waking Lena.

"I've been waiting for you to come to bed for over an hour." She made no attempt to move as he sat up in front her. "I don't want to fall asleep without you…"

Jack's shoulders slumped, defeated by her plea, the look on her face and her frog voice. "I fell asleep…I'm sorry." He rubbed his eyes, trying to wake up.

"Don't be sorry." She ran her hand down his arm. "I just missed you." She looked into his eyes intensely, "Jack, I love you…"

He leaned in quickly, relieved to hear her say it but silencing her thought with a kiss. His hand tangling into her dark tresses as his mouth conveyed what his heart felt. He kept his hand on the side of her neck as he looked into her big brown eyes, "And I love you…Now let's go to bed." He smiled softly. Jack held her hand, helping her to stand before standing himself. "Here." He passed the baby off to her.

"Jack, I…" She didn't think she could carry Lena 'safely' up the steps as it took a great deal of effort just getting down them on her own. Before she had time to voice her concerns, the baby was in her arms and Jack had scooped them both into his arms. She smiled and shook her head as they walked up the steps.

Jack laid her carefully into the bed and waited for her to kiss the baby 'goodnight' before putting Lena into her bassinet with a kiss of his own. He stripped off his clothes and pulled on a pair of pajama pants before sliding into bed next to Irina.

As he spooned up behind her, Irina wrapped her arms around his, entwining their legs and backing as closely into him as she could.

"Are you ok?" Jack asked after a moment in the dark of just holding onto one another; knowing she had one hell of a day and had to be overwhelmed.

"Yeah…" She answered softly, feeling the tears running over the bridge of her nose and Jack realized she was crying when she moved her fingers to wipe away the tears.

"Then why are you crying?" He asked softly, moving his face to lay on top of her head, cheek to cheek with her, as close as their bodies would allow in the present position.

She tried to hold back her silent sobs and Jack felt her body jump softly beneath him with her shaking breaths. "Because I was just thinking, how happy I am… to be here…in your arms again... Don't let go..

Irina slept like a log all night long and Jack was the one who got up to feed Lena during the evening hours, which he didn't mind at all having the chance to bond more with his youngest daughter.

When morning came and Irina was still asleep, Jack brought the baby with him downstairs and was surprised to find Mikhail already having breakfast with Dmitri.

"Morning." Mikhail gave Jack a small smile before taking a sip of coffee.

"Morning." Jack acknowledged him and Dmitri as he started making Lena's bottle.

Seeing Jack was struggling slightly to hold the baby and do the task at hand of mixing formula, "I can hold her for you while you do that." He motioned over the table that he would take Lena.

Jack found himself slightly hesitant to relinquish his and Irina's baby to him but handed her to him none-the-less. "Thank you." He added almost as a second thought and could feel Dmitri watching their interaction.

"No thanks needed." Mikhail smiled cradling the tiny baby in his arms. "I haven't held a baby until her for…well probably since Michael was a baby." He realized shaking his head in wonder. "She's absolutely perfect." He marveled running his finger over her long slender ones. "She has Rina's hands." He looked up and smiled to Jack from across the table.

Jack nodded and gave a brief smile at the though. "So does Sydney."

"I remember her telling me that." Mikhail's smile drifted as did the look in his eyes thinking about that discussion in prison of their children. "What time are they supposed to arrive?" He asked nervously after a few minutes thinking about the reunion with his son.

"Everyone's flights get in around the same time I believe, around five I think." Jack poured the hot water into the bottle and began reading how much formula he needed to add.

"Everyone's?" Mikhail asked curiously while he shifted Lena to his shoulder, laying his cheek against her head and relishing the smell of a new baby he hadn't enjoyed in almost thirty years.

"Lena's other two Godfathers Eric and Marshall are on their way from Los Angeles, Katya, and her children Sergei and Sofia are coming from various cities in Italy and Sydney and Vaughn are coming from Paris."

"Paris?" Mikhail suddenly paled realization hitting him. "Bella…"

"Yes." Jack noticed the man's sudden pale complexion thinking about his 'wife.' "They went to spend a few days with her since they'll be with us on the actual holiday." He finished the bottle and offered Mikhail another cup of coffee.

"She lives in Paris now?" His mind suddenly racing back with thoughts of where they'd met there at a local street café, her beautiful smile and blonde hair captivating him from the moment he laid eyes on her, she had him.

"Vaughn said she moved them back there the year after you…died." Jack added softly, feeling strange about talking about someone's 'apparent death' other then Irina's for a change.

"I guess I realized she probably would, when I was gone. All of her family was there." He stared into the blackness of his coffee thinking about when he would 'see' her again…what he would say. "I was her only family besides our son in America."

Jack seemed to be reading his mind and asked, "When are you going to tell her?"

"I don't know." He sighed, running his hand over Lena's back, "I was talking about this with Rina last night. What do you say to the woman you love and lied to? The woman you left behind to raise your son on her own? Explain to her where I've been all this time?"

"And what did Irina say?" Jack asked softly, curious as to what his wife would tell him speaking from her own experience with the same thing.

"To stop thinking about it, wasting more time and just do it." He chuckled and smiled at her brashness that remained the same all these years later. "She's always had a way with words."

Jack smiled and chuckled with him, finding a certain ease in speaking with the man he knew was going to be a part of Irina's life, their life, from now on. "Yes, she does." He continued to smile thinking it wasn't 'so bad' to talk with another man who knew Irina so well.

"May I?" Mikhail asked pointing to the bottle in Jack's hand.

"Sure." He handed him the bottle and watched as Mikhail maneuvered his daughter into a cradling position as if he were handling glass.

They sat in companionable silence as Jack ate breakfast and Mikhail fed Lena, watching her in awe with a smile. "She's really happy, Jack." Mikhail looked up, speaking suddenly and surprising Jack. "I can't tell you, how happy that makes me…to know, to see her smile again after the last images of her I've carried around with me for twenty years. You've brought the light back into her eyes. I could see it in her last night, hear it in her voice…her laugh." He smiled warmly chuckling to himself with the thought. "I've never seen her happier, than with you…"

When Jack didn't say anything, unsure of how to respond, Mikhail added, "I just wanted to tell you that. 'Thank you'…for loving 'Irina' the way you do."

Jack knew what was implied with the emphasis on Irina's name. "I loved everything about 'Laura,' it was all consuming." Jack said quietly after a moment, and he saw Mikhail holding his breath as if unsure what Jack's meaning was. "Irina is more, then Laura ever was…You don't have to 'thank me' for loving Irina," Jack swallowed the lump in his throat at this slightly awkward topic of conversation with the only other man Irina admitted to having made 'love' with; the first man, to ever make love with his wife. "I love Irina the way she deserves to be loved…with everything I have. She deserves nothing less."

"Agreed." Mikhail shook his head with a smile. "Nothing but 'everything."

"But I am thankful'… for our second chance." Jack added in all seriousness a moment later, his finger tracing the rim of his now empty cup.

"I hope I get a second chance." Mikhail added quietly in his deep voice.

"What are you doing?" Jack smiled entering Irina's room in the late afternoon. She was propped up in bed against numerous fluffy pillows reading.

"Mikhail left this in here." She spoke softy as he came around the bed and flipped back the cover of the magazine to show him what she was reading. It was the Russian magazine that Mikhail had shown Jack when he arrived. The reason he knew Irina had survived.

"I knew when I gave the 'go ahead' to the Cabinet to start releasing information and pictures what they was for, but I guess I never really realized it would be this…intense." She'd paused for a moment trying to find the right word to verbalize the surreal experience. "It's very strange to see and read about yourself in a magazine." She arched her eyebrow setting the magazine down on her lap as Jack sat on the edge of the bed next to her.

"Mother Russia' Imperial Russia and why Russian's want their Tsar," Jack turned the magazine on her lap and read out loud the headlines. "The majority of Russians want to bring back the monarchy now that they know about you. How do you feel about that?" He looked up searching her brown eyes, having never had the chance to discuss all of this and what it could mean for their future.

"I honestly don't know." Her finger traced the blue lettering on the magazine's covering.  
"I haven't had a chance to really think about it with all that's been going on."

Jack reached over and clasped her fingers in his. "And now our lives are being dissected and analyzed all over the world. I'm sorry Jack." Her brown depths found his.

"Irina, you have nothing to be sorry about. You are who you are." He smiled warmly, running his thumb over the back of her hand. "I'll admit it is still extremely odd for me to see my life on magazine covers and hear people referring to my wife as the Tsar of Russia," His smile grew and he chuckled, "You are still you. I am still me… and we'll figure the rest out as we go. As long as you're alive and with me, I don't care if they throw me under a microscope. I'm used to being analyzed. I'll enjoy the challenge."

She put her hand behind his neck softly and brought his lips to hers in a tender kiss. "Thank you."

"You look amazing in this photo by the way." Jack gave her his seductive grin, as he held up the magazine to look at her photo again. "When was this taken? It had to be recent?"

"The night of the ballet in Moscow, with Sydney and 'Thank you." She smiled happily at his comment. "They were waiting for us when the ballet finished."

"Are you ok with this?" He asked softly and pointed to the small insert talking about the article on her imprisonment for treason.

"I think I'm 'becoming ok' with it." She sighed, rubbing her thumb over Jack's now needing comfort, "I don't know…I was just reading the article and it was like I was reading about someone else. I don't know." She repeated honestly unsure how she felt about it all.

"Well you made the covers of TIME and Newsweek at home," He smiled and got up to dig the magazines out of his bag he'd bought to read in the airport. When he was walking back to the bed he got a strange look on his face. "I guess this is home for you though isn't it?"

"Home is wherever you are, Jack. I told you that." She smiled and kissed him again and then shook her head in disbelief staring at her face on the magazine covers. "And I honestly don't understand why my life is so news worthy." She burst out laughing and then coughing when she saw Jack's incredulous look. "I can still remember you taking this." She smiled as her fingers brushed over her face in the photo from their trip to Australia on the Newsweek cover. "It seems like a lifetime ago and yet…like it was yesterday." She looked up with a shy smile thinking about all that had happened in her life from the moment that photo was taken until now.

"Yes…a lifetime and yesterday." Jack smiled softly, agreeing and noticed Irina's yawn.  
"You should rest more. It's going to be like a circus when everyone gets here." He smiled surprised at his excitement over the first real Christmas his family was going to be having in twenty-two years. "Have you talked to Mikhail about how he wants to handle telling Vaughn?" He asked softly as he picked up the magazines and set them on Irina's night stand, helping her scoot down into her covers again.

"Yes." She smiled softly with tired eyes, holding his hand to her chest when she was settled. "I just hope that Michael is willing to give his father the same chance that Sydney is giving me."

"I think he will. Sydney found out who you really were and started coming to terms with it before we knew you were alive…" Jack brushed a lock of hair from her forehead. "I think that helped 'lessen the blow' if you will, when she finally did learn you were still alive. You've been helping Vaughn come to terms with who Mikhail really was, helping him realize that even though he wasn't the man Vaughn thought he was, he was still the same father who loved him…that wasn't a lie." He cupped her face softly with his hand, gently running his thumb over her cheek.

"I think going through the entire ordeal with Sydney already…seeing what she went through as someone in the same position he'll be in, will be a big help to him. He's watched you…seen you with Sydney. He knows now, how much you love her and never wanted to leave her…Observing him, watching you, he has this look in his eyes and I know he is thinking about what his life would be like if his father were still alive and came back into his life…" He broke into a soft smile, "Just as Sydney wanted her mother, her whole life…Vaughn has wanted his father, his whole life."

Irina smiled back with tears pooling in her eyes, a mixture of happy and sadness at that thought.

"I believe the end result will be the same. That the want to love and be loved by his father…will out-weigh the hurt caused by their separation. As with Sydney, it may take time; but Vaughn was there to help Sydney through it…and now she will be there to help him. And you…" He smiled softly kissing her lips lightly and then remained hovering a few inches over her face; "We'll be there to help Mikhail…as someone who's been in his position."

Irina smiled brightly as a lone tear escaped and rolled down her cheek, slowly she pulled Jack to her and covered his mouth with her own.

He understood and sympathized with Mikhail and Michael and the entire situation. He wasn't being selfish or jealous of Mikhail or her relationship with him and the bond they shared; he knew she would be there for Mikhail and he was telling her…he was ok with that, he trusted her. He believed in 'their love' enough to not feel threatened now. He was accepting Mikhail as a part of her life…of theirs,' and it overwhelmed her with love for Jack and how far they'd come.

"I love you…" She whispered holding his face a few inches from her own, staring into his own dark eyes, a silent 'acceptance' and 'thank you' passing between them without the use of words.

"I love you…" He murmured in Russian and dropped his lips slowly to capture hers' once more, holding onto her lip with his own he slowly pulled away, looking her in the eyes with a smile, "Now get some sleep." He pulled the blanket up around her shoulders and dropped one last kiss to her cheek before leaving the room and pulling the door closed behind him.

* * *

Paris-

"I can't believe your mother is the owner of one of 'my most favorite' places in Paris." Bella smiled, placing her hand on Sydney's forearm in the back of the car of with a smile. They were stopping at Irina's club on the way to the airport. "Does she visit here often?" She asked sliding her hand down Sydney's arm to hold her hand. Spending time together over the last couple of days, Bella had decided she adored Sydney and could see why her son would fall in love with such a girl and was sad they didn't have more time together.

"I don't know." Sydney returned the smile, feeling relieved and excited that Vaughn's mother had taken a liking to her and being coming fast friends over the weekend. "I never really asked her, but she must spend quite a bit of time here if I have to pick up 'this something' that is so important to her." She looked over across the car and her smile grew seeing how happy Vaughn was that his mother had fallen for Sydney just as he had, accepting her already as 'her daughter.'

"Michael told me that your Grandmother Anastasia escaped out of Russia and made her life with your Grandfather here in Paris." Bella continued her brilliant smiling at Sydney.

"That's what my mother told us and that my Grandparents were actually married here in Paris…I still can't believe it."  
Sydney smiled looking out the window at the people on the streets when they stopped at a light.

"I think it's terribly romantic." Bella raised her eyebrows with delight and a gleam in her eye looking at her son with a knowing smile. "One of the greatest love stories I've ever heard. Your parent's story is pretty amazing as well…" She turned back to Sydney and noticed she'd seen the look that had passed between she and her son.

Sydney had seen the interaction but didn't ask questions, instead turned her attention back to her parents. "Yes…Its still unbelievable to me how life has turned out. This time last year, my mother was in CIA custody, spending Christmas behind her glass cell."

She felt Bella squeeze her hand, "I went to see her Christmas morning, but not my father…I knew he was staying away. I realize now it wasn't because he couldn't stand her, angry with her for her betrayal…He was staying away because he was afraid of being around her…he was falling for her all over again and that's why he was terrified to be around her. Because, despite learning what we thought at the time was the truth about her…that she was a liar, a traitor, a KGB spy, a terrorist and mafia leader, an assassin…" She looked shyly at Vaughn and his mother remembering those awkward days between she and Vaughn when they believed her mother had killed his father, "In spite of all that my father still loved her." Sydney smiled to herself thinking about the moment she knew her father still loved her mother, when he refused to leave the prison in Kashmir without her. She knew it had nothing to do with 'completing the mission' by returning their prisoner and had everything to do with the fact her father wasn't about to leave her mother to die in the air strikes with Gerard Cuvee.

"How is your mother feeling today?"Bella asked concerned for the woman she hadn't even met having heard she was ill and why.

"My dad said her fever was down and seemed to be improving with the medication but that she was still sleeping all day, which is definitely not like my mom." Sydney frowned, still concerned for Irina and couldn't wait to see her for herself in a few hours.

"Sleep is good. It means the body is healing." Bella patted her arm reassuringly.

The car had stopped at the valet and the door opened letting them out of the backseat.

"We're here." Bella smiled and as Sydney got out of the car and stood in front of the club, she couldn't help but feel a strange sense of déjà vu.

The last time she'd been at this club, she hadn't known it was her mother's or for that matter hadn't even seen her mother alive yet at that point. So much had happened from then until now.

_***Via Con Me***_

"You've been here before?" Bella asked sensing something about the way Sydney was looking at the place as they made their way inside. Sydney couldn't contain her smile as she looked at Vaughn knowing he was thinking about the same thing.

"Yes. Just once, though I didn't know it belonged to my mother at the time."

"It's wonderful." Bella smiled clasping Sydney's hand in her own again. "They have wonderful singers, fabulous entertainment, fantastic food…this is the real classic Paris nightlife."

Sydney almost burst into laughter thinking about her own singing performance on the stage in front of her. Though she couldn't exactly share that story with Bella.

"This shouldn't take long." Sydney smiled softly as Vaughn and Bella took seat at the small beautiful bar to have a drink while they waited for Sydney.

"No hurry, we have time." Bella smiled, looking around.

"Ok." Syd returned the smile and then caught Vaughn's eyes giving him a quick kiss.

Sydney asked the bartender in perfect French where she could find Pierre and he nodded to a dark haired man sitting on the stool at the end of the bar, smoking a cigarette. Sydney slid onto the stool beside him with a small smile and the man turned to look at the beautiful woman who now sat beside him, enormous smile coming to his lips as he looked her over.

"You look familiar." He continued smiling stabbing out his cigarette onto a small silver ashtray. "Have we met before?" He wasn't sure but there was something about this woman's eyes that he remembered.

"No, actually we haven't." Sydney offered her hand, which he took and kissed, "My name is Sydney…Irina Derevko sent me to retrieve something for her from her office."

"Ah, yes she said I should be expecting you." He smiled, not releasing Sydney's hand. "You are as beautiful as your mother, that is why I thought I had seen you before."

Sydney was a little surprised to find out her mother had told the man she was sending her daughter, surprised and elated at the simple fact. She wasn't sure when it happened, but she was suddenly aware of the fact that over the last few months, she'd become 'proud' to be her mother's daughter instead of ashamed. "Thank you…" Sydney nodded as the man continued to smile at her.

"Can I offer you a drink?" He motioned for the bartender.

"No 'Thank you'…actually, I'm on my way to the airport so I can't stay…." She stood hoping to probe the man along. "If you'd please… I need to be on my way."

"Certainly," He stood with a smile, motioning her to lead the way through the crowd of people.

"Son," Amelie placed her hand gently on Vaughn's knee when Sydney was out of sight. "Take a deep breath, you look as though you're about pass out." She laughed softly stirring her drink with the tiny straw. "Everything is going to be ok, don't worry."

"Do you sing? Like your mother? She has a beautiful voice." Pierre smiled showing Sydney down a small hallway and up some stairs to Irina's office.

"Yes, I can sing but not too frequently." She smiled happy to hear these small details about her mother.

"That's a shame. It is always like 'pulling teeth' to get Irina to sing for us when she is here, but she is amazing and everyone loves her." He smiled opening the door after pressing in a very long series of numbers into the security box opening the door.

Once inside Sydney stood by the door taking in her surroundings as Pierre walked behind the big cherry wood desk and began punching another series of number into the large walk in safe, Sydney wasn't surprised to see.

He retrieved a large square package wrapped in brown paper that Sydney instantly recognized by shape to be a framed picture of some kind.

"This is it? This is what she wants me to bring to her?" She asked a little confused why this painting would be so important to her mother.

"Yes." Pierre smiled and handed her the rather large painting, mysteriously covered in brown paper.  
"You don't know what it is?" He asked with a hint of disbelief and intrigue.

"No. She didn't say, only that it was important." Sydney smiled fingering the wooden frame she could feel beneath the paper.

"Ah, yes it is very important to her…and now I know why." He smiled mischievously as he guided her into the hallway and locked the door again.

"It's a painting, that much I can tell but of what?" She wanted to rip open the paper and see for herself but knew that would probably be a bad idea as they were about to get on an airplane with it. It must be valuable to Irina and she didn't want to risk damaging it to satisfy her own curiosity.

"I'll let her tell you." He smiled again, "Please tell her 'hello' for me and perhaps next time, Sydney…you can stay longer, have that drink and share your lovely voice."

"Perhaps." She smiled, thinking 'not on your life will I get back up on that stage.' "Thank You, Pierre."

"And Sydney, be very careful with that." He nodded to the painting. "I know now, it is worth more then you could possibly believe. In fact, I can't believe she let it hang in this office for so many years knowing what I do about it now. So be careful."

"Ok." Sydney held the painting in her arms that much more delicately, anxious to find out what it was. "I've got it." She smiled when she found Amelie and Vaughn again. "We can go."

"That is obviously a painting, but of what?" Bella asked intrigued by the brown paper package as she grabbed her coat and Vaughn helped her into it.

"I don't know. Something mysterious that means a lot to my Mom apparently. I can't wait to get to St. Petersburg and find out. Vaughn, are you alright? You've barely said anything today? You aren't getting sick too are you?" Sydney immediately concerned placed her palm against his forehead.

"No, I'm not sick." He smiled warmly, and cupped her cheeks kissing her lips with a smile.


	33. Chapter 33

THIRTY-THREE

o

St. Petersburg-

"Hey you love birds, fancy meeting you here." Weiss smiled and grabbed Sydney into a big hug when he spotted them at the luggage terminal. "So, how's Paris?" He waggled his eyebrows at Vaughn, as Sydney hugged Marshall. "Your Mom?"

"Paris is wonderful, as is my mother. She said to say 'Hello.'" Vaughn laughed, grabbing his and Sydney's bags.

"Ah ha! I knew I left a lasting impression on her!" Weiss smiled triumphantly. "No woman can resist my 'magical' charm."

"This is so amazing." Marshall, looked around him. "I've never been to Russia." He smiled brightly and Sydney hugged him again as he looked too cute in his big fluffy parka and fur hat.

"Where did you get your hat then?" Sydney ran her fingers over the smooth fir on Marshall's head.

"I bought it on eBay." He smiled warmly, "It's a little too big but…It's authentic from Russia. I wanted to have one for this trip. "

"Why didn't you just wait until you got here to buy one?" Vaughn smiled perplexed at their bumbling friend, whose head seemed to be swallowed up by the large hat.

"I don't…I, I don't know." Marshall seemed to ponder the thought just now.

"Sydney!" They heard shouted from behind them before the beautiful woman flung her arms around Sydney in an enormous hug.

"Oh…my God…who's that?" Weiss stood open mouthed asking Vaughn under his shaky breath watching the two women in front of him.

"That's Sofia." Vaughn nudged him in the ribs, returning the waggle of the eyebrows with a smile at Weiss's reaction.

"So all the Derevkos are hot then!" Weiss whispered back in awe.

"It's been too long cousin! I'm so happy to see you again." Sofia smiled brightly with giddy as she bounced where she was standing. Her eyes seemed to travel over Sydney's shoulder to the dark haired man standing beside Vaughn.

"Hello Michael." She grabbed Vaughn's face and kissed his cheeks, "It's good to see you…tell me who is your friend." She stood in front of Weiss with her devilish Derevko eyes and Weiss felt himself melting under her gaze.

"Sofia, I'd like you to meet our friends Eric and Marshall." He answered looking at Sydney with a laughing smile, that they'd been right about Sofia and Weiss meeting.

"Hi Eric Weiss 6'2" single American male." Weiss was in a trance looking into Sofia's big brown eyes, the same brown eyes he'd seen on Irina Derevko that used to scare the shit out of him.

"Well Eric Weiss 6'2'' single American male…" Sofia flashed the same Derevko enchanting smile and he knew he was putty in her delicious fingers.

"I'm Sofia Irina Tatiana Marcelovena Romanova Bernelli 5'9" single Italian/Russian female."

"Charmed." Weiss kissed her hand, his eyes never leaving hers.

"I'm sure." She leaned up kissing both of his cheeks, flashing that smile before greeting Marshall. "Marshall is it?" She took hold of his hand covered in fluffy white mittens.

"Yeah-ess." Marshall swallowed hard Sofia having the same effect on him as Weiss under her beautiful stare. "I'mmm Marshall." He stammered and his hat fell over his eyes. He struggled with his mittens on to push the hat back up and felt strong smooth fingers brushing against his cheek as Sofia slid his hat back on with a smile before kissing his burning cheeks.

"It's a pleasure Marshall." She smiled warmly at the funny little man, "I like your hat." She winked and Marshall froze momentarily.

"You…you…you…have have Irina's eyes." He swallowed hard again mesmerized by her dark brown orbs.

"Yes…so I've heard." She smiled again purposely batting her long eyelashes as she purred in her accented English. "It seems we both got them from my Grandmother Anya."

"Where are Sergei and your mother?" Sydney tried not laughing at her cousin melting the men to puddles in front of her with her 'classic Derevko charm' she wondered if she would have inherited if Irina had raised her as Sofia had from Katya.

"They have already found Dmitri and are waiting in the car." She linked her arm with Sydney's. "I wanted to come find you." She smiled and then looked at the large package under Sydney's arm curiously narrowing her eyebrows in another flash of Derevko Vaughn immediately recognized.

"What is this you are carrying Sydney?"

"Some painting of my mother's she wanted me to bring from Paris." Sydney shrugged as they all pulled their coats up a little higher around their necks to ward off the cold blast of air that greeted them outside.

"All right nice!" Weiss smiled seeing the long black limo in front waiting for them, "Traveling in style, I like it." He craned his neck looking down at the license plate after putting his suitcase in the trunk.

"What are you doing?" Vaughn asked looking at Weiss like he was going crazy, as did Sydney.

"Just reading the license plate. Just wondering if it was a vanity plate that said, 'The Man' or 'The One' you know being Irina Derevko's car and all." He smiled when he saw Sydney shaking her head trying not to laugh.

"The Man?" Sofia asked confused, not understanding this strange exchange that was obviously a private joke.

"You don't know who 'The Man' is?" Weiss looked at her in shock with a dangerous smile as they slid into the car. "You don't know about 'The Man?'

"No, should I?" She titled her head looking back and forth between the man in front of her and Sydney.

"That was my mother's code name in the 'organized world' Sofia." Sydney added softly, sliding into the backseat. "Hello Katya, Sergei." She smiled warmly and hugged them both, holding Katya a little longer both relieved that this time they were seeing each other wasn't under such duress as last with Irina's execution.

"Hello Sweetheart." Katya sighed into Sydney's hair with a smile. "It's so good to see you again."

"Wait, I don't understand." Sofia shook her head, not about to let this drop again.  
"Why would Irina, who is a woman, be called 'The Man?"

"Because Irina is equal too or rather above any man in the organized world. Don't you see, it's like a word play? She is 'The Man' because she is the head of her organization and the most powerful of the others."

Weiss found this girl sitting so closely beside him as fascinating as her aunt.

"No, I still don't get it. She is a woman. Why not call her 'The Woman?" Sofia kept asking and Vaughn and Sydney shared a smile, thinking about the last time they'd seen Sofia and her relentless questioning.

"Because that's not as intimidating." Seeing Sofia's narrowed eyebrows he quickly jumped to explain, "Ok here, you're Italian so you obviously know about the mafia right? You've seen The Godfather movie? You know 'go to the mattresses,' 'leave the gun, take the cannoli?"

Sofia nodded wondering where he was going with this.

"Well, Irina is like 'The Godfather' of all the Dons. When people heard 'The Godfather' they were terrified of his wrath so they respected him, did what he said out of fear. The nickname, 'The Man' has that same power."

Sofia's eyes went wide in horror, "Irina is 'The Godfather?' People fear her? People feared 'the Godfather' because he killed people and put dead horses heads in their beds, are you telling me that's what my aunt does? You all told me she never killed those CIA agents!" She looked at Vaughn, Sydney and her mother expectantly.

Weiss felt like a deer in headlights and Sydney's heated glare at referencing her mother to 'the Godfather' even if it was an accurate analogy.

"Sofia, Rina didn't kill any CIA agents. She was telling you the truth. But do you remember what she also told you?" Katya clasped her daughter's hand in hers.

"Yes, that 'knowing her was dangerous' and the 'less I know the better.' This falls under both those categories doesn't it? Something all of you know as CIA agents who 'hunted her down?'" She looked with dark eyes at the four agents in front of her. "I just can't imagine the woman I've heard about all my life, the woman I met just a few months ago…I can't imagine Irina being that terrible, that dangerous…with everything she's done for us, or family and friends, for all of Russia. She is so different then what I am hearing in these stories."

"Yes, she is different Sofia. She's not a terrible person. Irina is the same loving person that you know, Sweetheart. There is just a lot more to her. She was using her power, that respect that came with it…to change Russia, to help our country… Which she has and still is. She is not a bad person…" Katya tried making her daughter understand seeing she was getting upset again as she did the last.

"But she's killed people?" She challenged her mother and the four agents in front her.

"It comes with our line of work and only when necessary. They are not innocent people, Sofia…they are the bad guys and sometimes that's the only way to stop them." Sydney sighed trying to explain a difficult thing for a civilian to understand.

"But you were after Irina, you're CIA? You were supposed to _shoot and kill her_ if you had the chance…because 'she was…is," Sofia stumbled trying to figure out what to say, "The bad guy? Right? That is why your country executed her?"

"Oh boy," Sydney sighed under her breath. "Yes, that is what we thought, Sofia. But we were misinformed. We didn't know what my mother was really doing. We didn't know we were 'both' working for the same goal, to stop a very evil man. We thought she was trying to help him…" She sighed thinking about Sloane, "Yes she was once our country's enemy, as we were hers'…but she's our ally now. We are working together."

"Oh." Sofia seemed to accept this as a good answer, "Seems there was a lack of communication between you…On many levels." She raised her eyebrows at Sydney with a small smile.

"Yes, there was." Sydney admitted, thinking about all that they hadn't known about her mother, both personally and professionally.

"So Irina isn't scary?" She looked around needing confirmation.

"Oh no, she's still scary." Weiss said in all seriousness before cracking a smile everyone started laughing, except Sofia, "Maybe intimidating when she wants to be is a better name then scary," He added. "Like when she's looking at you with those eyes of hers, like you're doing to me now. Like a feral cat about to pounce." He added and everyone laughed harder including Sofia.

"The first time I'd gone to see her in the glass cell," Vaughn shook his head sobering up remembering that day, "She was pacing like a caged tiger, then stopped and got as close to the glass as she could…looking at me those eyes like she was going to eat me alive."

"Yeah, I bet you were about ready to piss your pants." Weiss added and everyone started laughing again. "I think all our first encounters were that way." He slapped Vaughn on the back, looking at Sydney. "At least you had the protection of glass, Syd and I both got shot." He laughed, finding it easy to now that it was in the past and their current relationships with Irina.

"She shot you? The first time she saw you, she shot you? Both of you?" Sofia's eyes went wide again, and Sydney kicked Weiss's shin with her foot from the opposite side of the limo.

"Yes." Sydney offered a small smile, trying to calm her cousin. "She was saving my life though I didn't know that at the time."

"And to be fair, she didn't really shoot at me," Weiss shrugged and smiled apologetically at Sydney for exposing another landmine, "Her screwdriver did…it just sounds cooler to say I was 'shot by Irina Derevko."

"Screwdriver?" Sofia stared in wonder as St. Petersburg flew by outside.

"Yes, the woman is a genius." He smiled warmly at Sofia with a little laugh, "She rigged a gun with a screwdriver and her hair band to keep firing rounds so we'd think there was a sniper still on the roof. One of those stray rounds hit me."

"My God." Sofia gasped in a mix of horror and fascination at this insane side of her family.

"Well, my first encounter with her wasn't scary and Mr. Bristow was in there with her so… I knew she wasn't all that scary if she was Sydney's mom." Marshall smiled at Sydney nervously. "She just kept smiling at me, even after I injected her with the tracker which would have made most people cringe and cry. She's tough." He nodded with his cute smile, thinking about his Christmas gift to Irina.

"Tracker?" Sofia kept asking more questions in fascination.

"Ah, something we aren't at liberty to tell you about." Weiss shrugged apologetically.

"But…its removal, that little tracker in her shoulder," Katya grinned wickedly, "Is how our little Lena was created."

"Ooh, I see." Sofia laughed as Sydney groaned and began blushing as did Marshall thinking about Jack taking the tracker out of Irina's shoulder that led to. Marshall knew he saw some fire of raging electricity still passing between them in that cell before they'd left for Bangkok.

"Spending all this time with Irina…alone, these past few days…poor 'Panama Jack." Katya added laughing and another round of hysterical laughter came out of Weiss and Vaughn, who tried to keep it inside making him shake.

"I don't get it?" Sergei, Marshall, and Sofia all said at the same time, making the others, save Sydney burning red on the other side of the corner trying to distract herself from thinking about it by looking out the window, burst into another round of laughter.

"After you have a baby," It finally dawned on Sergei, the medical student, "For six weeks you can't…" He motioned with his hand trying to make them figure it out on their own without having to say the words.

"Ooh." Sofia added with a smile, nudging Sydney as Marshall added, "And it hasn't been six weeks so they can't? Ahhh."

His cheeks flashed red as his eyes widened thinking about the hard-nosed Jack Bristow he knew doing anything remotely like that.

"Ahh," Sofia gasped with delight, "We're here."

She and everyone else looked out the window at the amazing sight before them as the big gates covered in white lights opened to reveal Alexander Palace to them for the first time decorated for Christmas.

No one said anything, too much in awe as the car made its way up the long drive way going around the hundreds of trees lit up as they approached the house.

"Oh. My. God." Weiss gasped with mouth open as the car pulled up in front of the incredible palace. "Look at this place."

"Someone pinch me." Marshall barely whispered, struggling to keep his hat from falling over his eyes as their hot breath pressed against the limo windows making frost on the other side. "Owe!" He turned to suddenly to look at the culprit who actually pinched him and was lost under the darkness of his hat once more.

"You said to pinch you." Weiss grinned as Dmitri stopped the car and opened the door.

"Wow…" Vaughn couldn't stop starring at the immaculately lit house before him, its sheer size towering above them, daunting in its beauty. They all stood amazed at the house and then turned to look over the entire grounds lit not only by the millions of little white lights but the full moon; the beauty literally astounding.

"Irina did a beautiful job didn't she?" Dmitri smiled at Katya as they all removed their bags and packages.  
"She had Illiyah decorate to her specific instructions. Amazing."

"Breathtakingly beautiful." Katya smiled as they opened the enormous front door and stepped inside.

Weiss and Marshall stood in awe in the immense room before them, having never been to Alexander before. A gargantuan Christmas tree at least twenty feet high stood to the right of them against one wall, and two slightly smaller ones at the base of the grand staircase on each side. All three trees decorated to the hilt with white, gold and red lights.

"Wow." Marshall could hardly breath at its beauty and realizing where he was standing, in a room where the Tsars had lived and still did.

"Syd," Vaughn whispered into her ear as he helped her to remove her fluffy coat. "Have you noticed the way Dmitri keeps looking at me?"

"What?" Sydney turned in his arms with a smile and a laugh, "No. Why we would he be looking at you?"

"I don't know. It just feels like he's staring at me." He shrugged watching the old man helping Katya out of her coat.

Sydney looked up to the second floor and over the banister she could see her father slipping out of her mother's room. "Dad!" She smiled warmly as Jack came down the stairs with a smile on his face, disturbing to those still not used to this side of Jack Bristow. Sydney engulfed him into a big hug, kissing his cheek. "How are you?" She looked into her father's face and realized how tired he looked.

"I'm good actually." He smiled, "How are you? Did you have a good flight?"

"Yeah, the flight was fine other then the people pointing at me and whispering." She smiled and laughed.

"Yes, I got that too." Jack added dryly before smiling at how happy Sydney looked.

"Did you see Mom's on the cover of TIME?" She asked still in shock with bright eyes.

"Yes. Saw those as well." He smiled thinking about his beautiful wife gracing the cover.

"The Russian equivalent graced their cover with photos of both of you from the other night in Moscow…at the ballet."

"Really?" Sydney shook her head baffled by all of this attention still. "How is Mom?" She was dying to see Irina again after only a couple days separation.

"She's feeling much better." He smiled relieved, "She and your sister are upstairs sleeping but she wanted to be awoken when you arrived."

"So…you two talked?" She asked softly with a big smile.

"Yes." He smiled and kissed her head at her mischievousness.

"We talked…and we're ok, in fact we're better then ok."

"Good." Sydney smiled, looking Jack in the eye. "That's all I wanted for Christmas." Her smile grew seeing her father's reaction to her admission. "I'm going upstairs to wake up Mom." She kissed him again quickly on the cheek and ran up the stairs with excitement as Jack greeted everyone and they made their way into the Throne Room decorated spectacularly for just the occasion with chairs and sofas around the fireplace and Christmas tree with mounds of gifts already lying under it.

Irina had hung stockings with all their names stitched in Cyrillic across the top over the enormous fireplace and Dmitri went to begin preparing dinner with Katya as everyone else sat around talking.

Vaughn noticed Jack was looking at him from the big leather chair on the opposite side of the room and began wondering if he wasn't being paranoid.

* * *

Sydney crept into the bedroom and saw her mother asleep on the bed, looking 'too beautiful for a woman so sick' she thought with a smile. She saw her sister curled into Irina's chest snuggling and sucking her thumb, something Sydney had never seen her do and made her clasp her hand to her heart how cute they looked. She decided she would wake Irina the same way she had always awoken Sydney, by folding her arms over her and pressing her cheek to hers. As soon as she did, she felt Irina smile, knowing exactly who was waking her.

"Merry Christmas." Sydney spoke softly, not wanting to wake Lena.

"Merry Christmas." Irina reached her free hand up to cup Sydney's cheek against her own. Irina's voice had improved some but still sounded much deeper then her normal one and it momentarily stunned Sydney.

"How are you feeling?" She whispered into her mother's ear, making no attempt to move from where they were.

"Better. Especially now that you're here." Irina closed her eyes and smiled thinking about how blessed she was for this moment surrounded by her daughters on Christmas. "I missed you."

"I missed you, too." Sydney kissed her on the cheek before moving to sit so she could look at her mother. "Dad said you talked…and everything was 'ok'…'better then 'ok' he said." Her eyes danced with delight.

"Yes." Irina smiled, taking Sydney's hand in her own as she lay there looking up at her. "We did a lot of talking." 'And a lot of other things.' She thought to herself with an enormous smile. "Things…went well." She continued to smile through her cryptic answer.

"I gathered, judging by the smile on Dad's face, and the one on yours' now…" Sydney laughed with her dimply grin that Irina would never get tired of seeing. "I'm glad, because Mom…he looked 'so' miserable at the airport when we were in Paris." She laughed shaking her head thinking about her father's disheveled appearance.

"He certainly surprised me that night." Irina smiled as she gently moved her arm away from Lena to sit upright with Sydney's help.

"How was Paris?" Irina turned her dark eyes to Sydney's.

"It was amazing. Vaughn's Mom…is amazing." Sydney couldn't stop smiling.

"I think the two of you might actually…really like each other. You're alike in a lot of ways I think."

"Really." Irina raised her eyebrows with a small grin finding that interesting.

"And I'm sure she loved you…"

"We hit it off right away." Sydney held Irina's arm as she slowly stood. "She wanted me to 'thank you'…for the photos, and for what you did for Mikhail…in Kashmir." Sydney added softly, swallowing the lump in her throat. "She wanted me to tell you…'thank you for the offer' to spend the holiday here, but she just needs a little more time to adjust to all of this new information about her husbands life. I told her, you of all people would understand."

Irina smiled softly, pulling Sydney's head to her lips, placing a soft kiss in her daughter's hair.  
She could understand why Amelie would need more time. She also couldn't help but think about how this woman was going to react finding out her husband was still alive…how Michael was going to react.

"Pierre says 'Hello' and wants you to come back and sing for them, I definitely want to be there for that performance."  
Sydney smiled and laughed softly when she saw Irina roll her eyes. "So what is this mysterious painting you wanted me to bring home anyway?"

"It's downstairs?" Irina's eyes immediately lit up.

"Yes." Sydney watched Irina intrigued with her facial reactions.

"You'll see." She wiggled her eyebrows with her mischievous smile staring back at Sydney behind her in the mirror.

"How was the flight? And the car ride here?" Irina tried brushing her hair and felt weak. Sydney saw the struggle and took the brush from her, brushing it for her while the talked in the mirror.

"It was fine. The car was interesting though." She shook her head thinking about her inquisitive cousin. "Sofia got to asking questions again and Eric compared you with 'the Godfather,. " She saw Irina's eyes immediately flash to hers in the mirror with horror, surprise and humor. "Yeah, I know…he scared her."

"What did you tell her?" Irina asked softly with a big sigh.

"That you're not 'that' bad." Sydney gave her a small smile that had the desired affect and made Irina smile. "We convinced her you were more 'intimidating' then 'scary." She laughed meeting Irina's eyes as she continued to brush her mother's long wavy hair, not that it still needed it, just because she liked to. "I remember brushing your hair when I was little." Sydney cleared through the fog in her mind and could clearly see herself standing behind her mother on the bed, brushing her long beautiful hair.

"I remember, too." Irina smiled, happy to see her daughter remembering. "You could play with it for hours, tying it in knots in your attempts to braid it," She laughed, "I remember trying to teach you how to braid before I left." She smiled softly, "Who ended up teaching you?" She asked quietly, pained that it wasn't herself that got to finish teaching Sydney.

"Francie." Sydney answered after a moment, tears pooling in her eyes thinking about her lost friend and the events surrounding her death.

"We were in Fifth Grade…" She felt the tears coming faster and Irina's heart was breaking watching Sydney in the mirror. "Mom…" She swallowed hard, willing her tears back as she slowed the brush strokes. "Did you…why…why Francie?" She had finally asked the question that had haunted her for almost a year. "She was innocent." She choked back a sob, "She didn't deserve to die. She was my best friend. Why did you?"

Irina turned instantly wrapping her arms tightly around Sydney's neck, tears welling in her own eyes at Sydney's pain. "Sydney," She pulled back taking a deep breath, and tilting Sydney's chin up to look at her with her fingers. "I'm not going to say I'm not responsible for your friends death, because I am." She saw the instant flood of tears surge Sydney's eyes before she turned her face away from Irina again. Irina used her fingers to turn her face back to look at her again. "When I turned myself into CIA, I gave Sark control over my organization, I told him that we needed a Los Angeles contact…left it up to him to get one." She swallowed hard, watching Sydney's tears fall over onto her cheeks. "I didn't know he'd killed your best friend, replaced her with the other double as our asset until after I was extracted. I'm sorry." She reached up to brush away the steady stream of tears rolling down Sydney's cheeks.

"So you didn't know? You didn't purposely pick my best friend?" Sydney asked with shaky breath.

"Sweetheart, no." She looked into her daughter's eyes. "Sark made that call, and I'm still not entirely sure why." Irina shook head with a sigh, "Though I believe I know why…that's my fault, too." She looked apologetically at Sydney. "After I found you and you knew I was alive, I knew he was jealous of you, Sydney."

"Jealous? Sark?" Sydney looked at her confused and astounded, "Why?"

"Because you were my daughter." Irina smiled sadly while her hands, moved to hold Sydney's up in her own against her chest. "Because even though I'd raised him and not you. You were my flesh and blood. My Sydney. And he was jealous of the love and affection I still felt for you, the ways I still tried to keep you safe. I suppose, he wanted to hurt you for that…that's why he chose your friends, Will and Francie." She looked deeply into Sydney's eyes with tears in her own, "I'm sorry, Sydney. I'm so sorry."

Sydney could hardly believe what she was hearing but Sark's actions, comments and remarks toward her and about her mother started making sense with that theory. His comment in Paris when they'd been forced to work together for SD-6. He'd told her he 'thought of Irina as his own mother.'

The way he mockingly called her 'Princess' like a taunting child, as if she were somehow she were the 'spoiled' sibling. After finding out about her royal heritage she thought maybe that was why, but with what her mother just said, she could see it now.

Sark saw her as a threat…to his relationship with her mother, the 'only mother he'd ever known,' the woman who raised him. "You didn't know Mom." Sydney pulled Irina into her, holding onto each other.

"But I'm still responsible, and I will spend the rest of my life sorry for what happened." Irina held her closer and kissed her hair. "And I am sorry Sydney."

"I know." Sydney sniffled back more tears. "But, I just want to know what happened to her body? I want to give her a proper burial." Sydney pulled back and grabbed a tissue from the box next to the sink for both she and Irina.

"I don't know what happened to her, Sweetheart." Irina felt ashamed she couldn't even answer that question for her daughter to give her some 'peace' and closure over her friend's death. "I will ask Julian."

"No." Sydney suddenly said forcefully anger rising in her, surprising Irina. "I will ask him. I want to hear him tell me 'why' he chose my friends."

"Ok." Irina stroked Sydney's hair, trying to sooth and calm her down, seeing how upset she was.

"Jack," Vaughn asked quietly coming up to stand beside him when they were helping Dmitri bring out trays of hot chocolate, Christmas cookies and of course, vodka. "Can I talk to you a minute? Alone…" He added nervously as Dmitri kept looking at him from across the kitchen, stirring the soup.

Jack was immediately tense thinking Vaughn somehow knew something was going or that his father was upstairs waiting in the bedroom. He managed to keep his stoic calm and set the tray down again.

"Ok Mr. Vaughn." Jack shared a quick look with Dmitri as they left the kitchen. "Let's go to the library." Jack took a seat in one of the big brown leather armchairs and watched as Vaughn nervously sank onto the couch near him. "So, what's on your mind, Vaughn?" Jack asked sitting almost regal like against the back of the chair.

"Jack…I…" He fidgeted nervously with his hands struggling to ask, "Mr. Bristow." He finally looked up at him and Jack felt his heart tense immediately, "I want to ask you…for your permission to marry your daughter. I want to ask Sydney to be my wife…and I would like your blessing." Vaughn felt small, the smallest he'd ever felt under the scrutiny of Jack Bristow's dark gaze.

Jack was stunned and yet he wasn't. His mind flashed back to the conversation he'd had with Danny, the last man who had wanted his permission to marry his daughter and how terrible that conversation had gone. He'd made Danny feel terrible. His own life was so miserable then and he had 'no' relationship with his daughter at the time, he felt like he'd lost that 'fatherly right' many years before.

But here was a young man in front of him he'd watched his daughter develop a relationship, saw how they complimented one another, challenged each other…went to extremes to protect the other. His own relationship had begun healing the same time that theirs had begun.

After speaking with Sydney, seeing her happiness with Vaughn, he knew they were meant for one another. He felt honored that Vaughn would ask for his blessing. He studied Vaughn a moment and saw the younger man remain upright and confident, waiting patiently for his answer.

Jack knew he didn't need to ask 'why' Vaughn loved Sydney or how he was going to take care of her or make her happy…he'd seen it with his own eyes over the last three years they'd been working together.

"Vaughn," Jack finally addressed him, leaning forward towards Vaughn, "You have my blessing." He finally smiled when he saw the evident surprise on Vaughn's face, by giving him the blessing without an interrogation. Jack clasped Vaughn's knee with his hand, giving it a squeeze and shaking the younger man out of his daze with a chuckle.

"Thank You." Vaughn couldn't believe he felt himself getting choked up and stood to shake Jack's hand. Jack stood and clasped his hand and in a move that stunned them both, pulled Vaughn into his chest and hugged him with a big 'manly' slap on his back.

"Just make her sure she stays happy, and you and I will never have a problem." He squeezed Vaughn's shoulder when they separated with a little more pressure then necessary, sending a message, before laughing.

"So when are you going to ask her?" Jack couldn't believe his 'baby' was going to get married or how comfortable he suddenly felt with the idea. Irina had changed him.

"Tonight." Vaughn surprised him, "When we open gifts."

'Oh, this going to be possibly the biggest night of this kid's life,' Jack thought to himself as they went back to the kitchen thinking about his proposal and finding out his father is alive and upstairs. 'And one helluva Christmas!'

* * *

"Are you ready?" Jack opened the door to the bedroom ten minutes later wearing a big smile when he saw the three loves of his life, sitting on the bed together, beautiful and smiling.

"Yep, we're ready." Irina smiled beautifully as she looked down to the baby in Sydney's arms.

"Oh, wow." Jack was in awe looking at Lena in her gorgeous Christening gown, long and white with tiny little satin bonnet over her soft dark hair. She was sleeping peacefully, nestled in the matching white blankets. "She looks so beautiful." He smiled dropping a kiss to her tiny head as he ran his finger over the back of her hand. "I remember the day we baptized you." He looked up at Sydney smiling, with his secret. "I can't believe you're all grown up." He dropped a kiss to her head before smiling over at Irina.

"Is her gown still in the cedar chest?" Irina suddenly asked and Jack smiled and finished her thought.

"In our bedroom? Yes." He smiled warmly. "Everything is right were you put it." Which was the truth, he hadn't gotten rid of anything in her cedar chest, keeping it all for Sydney and if he had gotten it out on those lonely nights alone with his Scotch to wander back in time, he always put them back exactly where they were. He knew Sydney did the same thing, as if preserving one more thing of her mother, her placement of the objects, by returning them to where she'd put them.

Sydney was smiling from ear to ear watching the exchange between her parents as they shared what was now again, a happy memory for them…her baptism.

"It was a good day." Irina smiled, reaching for Jack's hand which he gladly accepted and laced his fingers with hers. "Despite the error in judgment of asking Arvin to be your Godfather, though Emily seemed to hold up her part of the deal of loving you and protecting you in my absence." Irina smiled softly at Sydney remembering the close bond she'd had with Emily Sloane.

"Ehhh." Sydney mock shuddered thinking about Sloane as her Godfather. "Creepy lying bastard he turned out to be. Standing in a church, before God, promising to love and protect me. What a sick joke as he turned out to be the person to hurt me the most. Put me in the most danger."

"Yes. Something we'll never forgive ourselves for…trusting him with the best interests of our child." Jack added softly with apologetic eyes, squeezing Irina's fingers as they both looked at Sydney.

"Well, don't be too hard on yourselves. You trusted him. I made the same mistake." Sydney shrugged and then smiled. "Now let's not ruin or first Christmas Eve together in decades and Lena's baptism with talk of the ass-clown troll that is Arvin Sloane." She laughed seeing her parent's reactions.

"Ass-clown troll?" Irina repeated in disbelief as Sydney kept laughing, hearing the phrase come out of her mother's mouth sounding hilarious with her sick voice and thick accent. "I think I like this term. I shall use it more often." She started laughing as Jack rolled his eyes trying not to laugh at their choice of verbalizations. "Ass-clown troll." Irina repeated, finding it easily rolling off the tongue now. "It is accurate for him, isn't it?" She smiled at Sydney whose body was shaking with the giggles she was attempting to keep in. "Good analogy, Sweetheart."

"Are you clowns ready?" Jack finally smiled and pulled Irina up into his arms."Because dinner is ready and waiting."

"Yes, Panama Jack." Irina smiled devilishly with her seductive eyes as Jack scooped her up into his arms.

"Oh God!" Sydney rolled her eyes, trying not to smile. Sure, their sexual innuendos drove her nuts but it was a small price to pay for having her parents back together, in love and happy again. "You two are crazy!"

"Ok Mrs. Claus." Jack smiled back at Irina following Sydney down the stairs, thinking about the beautiful woman in his arms in her sexy little red Christmas present.

"Mrs. Claus?" Sydney turned her head with eyebrows furrowed with confusion before seeing the look on her mother's face as she looked at Jack. "Ok, wait…Don't tell me, I don't want to know." She said shaking her head looking away and Irina started laughing behind her.

* * *

"Merry Christmas!" Irina smiled brightly, greeting everyone in Russian when Jack entered the dining room carrying her.  
"Da svidanya!" She looked amazing, but slightly pale and the fact that Jack was caring this strong independent woman was a little unsettling to everyone as they all greeted her back, getting out of their seats one at a time starting with Katya to greet her with the traditional kiss.

"How are you feeling, Rina?" Katya kissed her cheeks and looked seriously into her older sister's eyes still alarmed to hear she'd been so ill.

"Better. Honestly." She smiled trying to reassure her sister.

"Then why did Jack have to carry you?" She cupped Irina's face, making the others wait and not caring.

"Because I'm not supposed to leave my bed for another two days," She rolled her eyes, "This is a compromise I had to make with Jack."

"Hmm. I see." Katya kissed her again quickly with a smile to Jack as he sat down. "Finally someone is getting her to listen. She's so stubborn."

"As a mule." Jack smiled and Irina threw him a glare with her dark eyes, reflecting the flicker from the candlelight.

Marshall was blushing and sweating before he even spoke to her, holding her hand in his he stumbled with his words and Irina couldn't help but smile at how cute he was nervous.

"Um…Hi."

"Hi." Irina greeted him back with her radiant smile trying not to giggle as everyone else did with Marshall's continued flustered nature around Irina. "Merry Christmas Marshall."

"Merry Christmas." He suddenly sighed, at ease with her smile. "Your home, this palace is amazing! Thank you…for inviting me. I'll never forget this day um night, ever. Best day ever…Well right up there after I won the Science Fair in was pretty cool too…I'm rambling again aren't I?" He paused awkwardly as Weiss nodded 'yes.' "Anyway…'Thank 4th grade and of course the day I was accepted at MIT and then meeting Sydney and of course the day Lena was born you.' Da svidanya." He added in Russian with a terrible accent that made Irina giggle. She found him charming when others found him nerve-wracking.

When she pulled his head towards her lips to greet him with kisses his face flashed red as he blushed for the fourth time that evening.

"Aunt Rina." Sergei smiled his handsome grin as he leaned over to kiss both her cheeks. "Good to see you again."

"And you Sergei." She returned the smile. "How's school?"

"Hard. But I am muddling through." He shrugged with a knees weakening smile.

"Liar." Sofia cautiously made her way toward Irina, "He's getting perfect scores. He'll make a brilliant doctor one day."

Irina smiled studying her niece whom she knew was still unsure about her, "How are you Sofia?" She kissed her cheeks softly, keeping one hand against her cheek as she asked softly with her motherly touch.

"I'm good." She felt the tension leaving her body with the soft caress of her aunt's hand and the warmness in her eyes and voice, in spite of being sick. "I'm so happy you're 'ok.' Mama was a wreck with worry." She smiled softly remembering Katya's panic when she learned Irina was going to be executed. "She loves you so much…so stop scaring her." She teased and felt relieved to see Irina smile.

"I will do my best to 'not be scary.'" Irina slowly enunciated the last three words with a smile, remembering Sydney's revelation in the bathroom that they had to convince Sofia she wasn't a scary person. Irina pulled her niece's face to her lips once again, kissing her cheek softly.

"Eric." Irina greeted Weiss, pulling on his hand, forcing him to bend over so she could kiss him 'hello,' and he felt his own cheeks feeling warm and begin blushing. She held her hand out to him and with her Cheshire grin added, "Maybe you should kiss my hand too." He looked at her startled, confused, "If I am 'the Godfather."  
She smiled brightly and saw his cheeks flush red instantly as everyone who'd been in the limo laughed out loud, which was everyone but Jack.

Weiss smiled and shook his head embarrassed, as he brought her hand to his lips. "I hope this doesn't mean I will wake up with a dead horses head in my bed in the morning?" He asked and everyone laughed harder.

"No, I don't think so. That's too messy and this is my house," She smiled warmly, "And the only horses around here are my own, which I'm quite fond of so, no. You're off the hook."

"You have horses? Here?" Weiss's eyes lit up in wonder.

"Yes, they are in the stables." Irina looked at him with a smirk of curiosity. "You'll see a few of them tonight actually. We'll be traveling by sleigh to the church."

"Hot damn! This place is better then Disneyland." He said seriously before breaking into a broad grin as everyone laughed again. "Who knew the Russian's could be so much fun?"

"Well, we did." Irina deadpanned and everyone hit another round of laughter.

"Irina Derevko with a sense of humor." Weiss teased her, "You're just full of surprises, aren't you?"

"You have no idea, Agent Weiss, no idea." She smiled back thinking about the biggest surprise yet, eating dinner in his room.

"Michael," She smiled softly, as he kissed her cheeks immediately.

"Irina, I'm glad you're feeling better." He offered a small nervous smile with the way she was looking at him. 'Jack must have told her.' He thought.

"Thank you." Irina held was able to find her resolve to keep from tearing up thinking about later this evening.

"Thank you…for the photos…of my father." He added softly. "My mother and I…we appreciate them." He couldn't believe how much his relationship had changed with the woman soon to be his mother-in-law over the last few months.

"You're welcome." She placed her hands on his cheeks and kissed him once more, willing herself to stay composed, finding it much harder these days.


	34. Chapter 34

_**AN: Music of this chapter (on repeat): **__**Carol of The Bells by George Winston, Believe by Josh Groban, O Holy Night by Susan Boyle**_

* * *

THIRTY-FOUR

o

When dinner was finished they all moved into the Throne Room again, feeling full, free and easy after a few shots of vodka and when Jack deposited Irina on the piano bench instead of the chair everyone stopped conversation.

"Jack…" She looked at him with wide eyes and flustered with nervousness.

"Mom, you can play again?" Sydney's eyebrows shut up in surprise, immediately getting emotional.

"Yes. She can." Jack replied softly, staring into Irina's big brown eyes with nothing but love and support.

"Mom, please…" Sydney begged seeing the resistance on Irina's part and desperately wanting to hear her mother play, "I haven't heard you play since I was six years old."

Irina turned her eyes from Jack to her daughter with Sydney's plea, knowing she wasn't going to be able to resist the 'puppy look' on Sydney's face.

She also knew that Sydney had still felt guilty over the fact that she had saved Sydney from her injury and this was her chance to relieve some of her daughter's unnecessary burden.

The others in the room, stared at her with hopeful wondering eyes as they had never heard Irina play and were fascinated to do so, save Katya.

"And I haven't heard you play since I was fifteen…before you left for America." Katya added softly with tears already pooling in her eyes as she held Lena in her arms. "Please Rina."

Irina's own eyes started to tear and she had to blink them back looking from her daughter to her sister.

"Ok." She agreed softly, seeing how much it meant to both of them. "Let's see." She turned her attention back to the piano looking at the keys with no music in front of her thinking about what to play.

"Doesn't she need music?" Weiss asked quietly to Sydney in wonder.

"No." Sydney shook her head feeling her own tears coming before Irina played her first note staring at her mother at the piano and seeing flashbacks to her childhood that she'd thought were lost forever because of Project Christmas. "She plays from ear, by memory. Always has."

Irina placed her hands above the keys hovering for just a moment before she started to play something she hadn't played since her last Christmas with Jack and Sydney.

_***Carol of The Bells***_

The song started slowly at first and was instantly recognizable to them all as Irina continued to play, her fingers moving faster and faster as the tempo picked up and the melody changed.

Sydney and Katya both had tears streaming down there faces from the moment she began playing her first notes both at the memory and sight of Irina playing again and relief that her injury hadn't ruined her musical genius for the rest of her life.

Mikhail had heard the faint sounds of the piano coming from downstairs behind his closed door and opened it a crack to listen. When he realized it was Irina that must be playing he moved quietly to sit next to the wall in the hallway and listen to beautiful sounds coming from the room below him with a smile on his face. He hadn't heard her play since she was sixteen, if he remembered correctly.

Weiss, Marshall, Sergei, Sofia and Vaughn stood in awe as they watched Irina's hands fly with incredible speed and grace along the black and white keys.

Sergei saw his mother's tears and smile as she watched her sister again for the first time in over thirty years play. He walked up silently behind her as she cradled the baby in her arms and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, hugging her from behind with a smile as she watched his incredible aunt.

'Another one of her surprises.' Weiss thought to himself realizing now why Jack and Sydney had both been worried by Irina's hand injury and possibility of never playing the piano again. He also realized from watching the speed and accuracy at which her fingers and hands flew up and down the keys why her hands were so deadly with a knife.

Marshall stood transfixed at yet another one of Irina Derevko's geniuses and mouthed 'wow' to Vaughn when the two met eyes.

Vaughn nodded and wrapped his arms around Sydney much the same way Sergei had done with his mother, offering her his support as he wiped her tears knowing how much seeing her mother play again meant to her. Not only at bringing back something from her childhood, something real about her mother, but because he had known the terrible guilt she felt when Irina sacrificed her hand to save her from the damage Cuvee inflicted in Moscow that night.

Sofia watched leaning on the back of the couch with Weiss beside her, both mesmerized by watching Irina. She turned her head slightly and smiled at Weiss seeing this man was enjoying it as well and equally stunned. She'd heard her mother and grandmother when she was little, talking about her aunt Irina and how she used to play the piano all the time so beautifully. She was very little but she could clearly remember her Grandmother sitting on the piano bench crying to her mother that she 'could still hear Irina playing…' Sofia didn't understand at the time but realized when she got older that her grandmother was haunted by Irina's absence and like a ghost, could hear the music and see her daughter sitting there playing in her own mind.

Jack's face lit into a warm smile as he watched her long fingers glide gracefully with amazing speed over the ivory keys.

Her face completely calm and relaxed as if this took no effort at all. He had always been and would always be fascinated by the sight of Irina playing the piano the way she did and the incredible music she could create out of her own mind.

Improvising familiar melodies making them her own or memorizing entire classical pieces down to the very last note just from hearing them. He wasn't try to 'woe' her when he said he loved her resonating mind as it was equally beautiful and mesmerizing as her body.

As Irina continued to play out the end of the song, her fingers slowing as a smiled finally graced her lips when the last notes were played.

Sydney had held her breath the entire song and when Irina was finished went flying over to her and thrown her arms around her from behind, almost knocking Irina right off the bench as everyone applauded loudly and some whistles courtesy Sergei and Weiss.

She could hear Sydney crying into her hair and feel her shaking as her arms held her shoulders. She beneath the embrace so she could wrap her own arms around Sydney with a smile.

"I'm so happy you're ok. That you can still play so beautifully," Sydney sobbed into Irina's hair as her arms clung to her mother's shoulders. "I was so worried you were never going to be able to play again and it was my fault and-"

"Sydney, no." Irina squeezed her tighter, pulling her closer to her body and meeting Jack's eyes over Sydney's shoulder. "You didn't do anything, it wasn't your fault." She turned her face to kiss Sydney's ear through her hair. "I'm okay now." She pulled Sydney back smiling wiping Sydney's tears, "I told you I would play again one day."Her comment got the intended response and Sydney smiled through her tears with a little laugh and threw her arms around Irina again. Rocking her body with hers in happiness as they sat together on the bench.

Sydney helped Irina to stand and when she turned to face her audience another round of applause went up and she smiled shyly…something most of them weren't used to, and gave a little bow with her head.

Jack took two steps and swooped her up into his arms, looking into her smiling eyes before kissing her soundly on the lips earning more whistles and applause making them both laugh against each others lips.

Mikhail smiled brightly, laughing softly hearing the happy people below and their obvious amusement at something after Irina's spectacular playing.

The first playing of any piano he'd heard in decades. Quietly, he slipped back into the room and waited for the right time to meet the young man who was his son.

The laughter and excitement had settled some as everyone found a seat around the fire place and tree to start opening gift. Sydney and Vaughn shared one large fluffy chair with Sydney sitting off to the side of his lap and Irina did the same with Jack on the other chair opposite them, Irina feeding the baby her bottle.

Weiss and Sofia sat on the fur rug in front of the tree and fireplace handing out gifts while Marshall, Katya, Sergei and Dmitri held down the couch.

The most hysterical bouts of laughter came when Irina opened her fourth Kevlar vest of the evening from Sydney and threw her hands up in surrender after already receiving one from Katya, Jack and Dmitri.

"Ok, ok…I get your point." She smiled and set it on top the others; "I'll wear Kevlar next time."

"Next time?" Dmitri's eyes went wide as his voice raised and everyone died with laughter at the poor older man's reaction. "There better not 'be' a next time! Or you'll be buying me a pace-maker, more likely a coffin!" He added and even smiled at Irina, who was 'thankful' everyone was able to find humor at the horrible situation now.

The other hysterical moments of the night came when Weiss gave Sydney a 'Pretty Pretty Princess Game,' when Irina received 'The Princess and Pea' from Marshall and when Jack opened his gift from Weiss which were books entitled, '101 Ways For A Jackass To Apologize,' and 'The Manual of Apologies for Today's Bumbling Jackass.'

"Just thought those may come in handy for you, Jack." Weiss smirked, comfortable in the safe distance on the other side of the room, as everyone continued to die with laughter and Jack's cheeks flushed crimson, he added, "And titled appropriate don't you think? Come on Jack…" Weiss began to melt under Jack's stare.

"Very funny, Agent Weiss. Very funny." Jack finally cracked a smile.

Irina nudged Jack's neck with her nose giving the warm skin there a kiss as she whispered into his ear when everyone else began talking amongst themselves about their gifts, laughing and passing out the contents of gifts inside the stockings.

She pulled back to look in his eyes and he knew what she was going to do.

"No…wait." He said softly and Irina creased her brow in confusion.

"Why?" She whispered back.

"Just…wait." He said with a smile as he motioned to Vaughn who looked like he just ate a bucket of nails holding a big box in his hands he'd just retrieved with a smile from behind the tree.

Irina's eyes sparkled with fascination seeing Jack's face watching Vaughn and wondering what was going on, she leaned back against Jack and kissed Lena's head.

"Ok…I'll wait." She said softly smiling.

"For me?" Sydney took the big box from Vaughn with wondering eyes, her face lit into an enormous smile before kissing him quickly on the lips and started tearing the paper off.

When she opened the box, there was a slightly smaller wrapped box inside. She laughed shaking her head as she ripped its paper off as well, finding another smaller wrapped box. "What is this?" She paused briefly to look at Vaughn with a strange smile before ripping into the next box and finding yet another smaller wrapped box, and again and again until her eyes were getting wide and everyone suddenly grew quiet holding their breath as she pulled out the last tiny box.

"Oh my..." Irina said barely above a whisper and Jack could feel her holding her breath when she realized what was in that box.

Slowly and with tears already forming in her eyes, Sydney unwrapped the last tiny box to reveal the small velvet ring box. Sydney sucked in a breath as tears started streaking down her cheeks and hands shaking she flipped open the top to reveal a stunning diamond ring. "Oh my God…" She echoed Irina's earlier sentiments as she found it difficult to swallow looking over at Vaughn.

He took a deep breath and dropped to one knee in front of her and her tears were blinding as she looked down at him, covering her mouth with one hand in shock.

"Sydney…" He began with a shaky voice staring into her beautiful brown eyes, he took her hand in his. "From the first moment you walked into my office with your crazy red hair," He smiled and everyone laughed including Sydney, "I knew that there was something special about you…You were unlike anyone…I'd ever met in my entire life. You fascinated me in so many ways from your feisty fighting attitude to your insurmountable strength at having the ability to go on after experiencing such tragedy…" He found his own eyes being to blur, "We became a team…I love you…and I want us to be a team for the rest of our lives." He swallowed and he heard Sydney holding back her sobs as she looked at him, hand shaking in his. "Sydney…will you marry me?"

She started nodding 'yes' before she said the word and Vaughn breathed a sigh of relief sliding the rind onto her finger and engulfing her in a hug as everyone clapped, cheered and cried.

"Yes! Yes! Yes! I'll marry you." She smiled, crying happily into his neck as he lifted her off her feet before kissing her.

"How did you know?" Irina was crying almost as much as Sydney when she turned her head to face Jack.

"He asked me." Jack smiled softly, wiping her tears with his thumbs, before capturing her lips in a kiss.

"Oh God, Vaughn... its beautiful!" Sydney didn't bother wiping her tears as she looked from the ring on her hand to the man she loved.

"It was the ring my father…gave my mother." He smiled softly wiping her tears as one lone tear finally slipped down his cheek.

"Your mother's ring?" She covered her mouth again in shock as she whispered through her fingers.

"She was very excited to have you wear it." He smiled and she threw her arms around him.

Weiss was crying in the corner having witnessed the entire relationship develop from the moment she walked into the CIA, through their first attempt at a date that ended in gun fire, their desperate first kiss at SD-6s' take down and now their engagement.

"I've been waiting for this moment for almost three years!" Weiss smiled excitedly as he hugged them both, laughing and making them laugh.

Everyone began congratulating them and Irina and Jack held off until the end, placing a sleeping Lena in her basket and watching their oldest glow with happiness.

"Mom." Sydney saw Irina standing there with tears matching her own and threw her arms around her.

"Oh Sydney, I'm so happy for you Sweetheart." Irina peppered her face with kisses before squeezing her again.  
"I love you. I'm so happy for you. Congratulations."

"Congratulations." Jack extended his hand to Vaughn with a smile.

"Thanks." Vaughn smiled back, clasping Jack's hand tightly.

When Irina relinquished Sydney, she threw her arms around Vaughn, kissing his cheeks and squeezing him harder then she ever had. "Congratulations." She pulled back to cup his face in her hand as more tears pooled in her eyes. "I couldn't think of a better man to marry my daughter. I'm so happy…for both of you." She smiled and kissed him again, with a big hug that made Vaughn smile and return the hug, holding Irina tighter then he ever had before.

"Dad…" Sydney smiled and felt herself start crying again when she saw the unshed tears in Jack's eyes, she launched herself into his arms.

"Congratulations Sweetheart." Jack held her close, happy that his child had finally found happiness after all the years of pain.

"You knew didn't you?" She pulled back searching his eyes for the truth. "That look in your eyes upstairs…like you had a secret."

"Yes," Jack laughed at her investigative skills, 'once a spy, always a spy.' "He asked me for my blessing earlier tonight."

"He did?" She asked barely above a whisper as tears came to her eyes remembering Danny's attempt and failure and how far her relationship with her father had come since then.

Jack nodded and she threw her arms around him again.

"Thank you Dad."

Dmitri had brought in more hot chocolate, coffee, and vodka for celebration when the excitement calmed down and everyone immediately began talking wedding dates.

"Now..." Irina turned in Jack's arms, whispering. "I'll go get him." She was about to walk away when he tugged on her arm.

"No, I will." He smiled, brushing her face with his fingers as he pulled her close. "You shouldn't be walking around and all this crying and laughing has already worn you out, I can tell." He challenged her to disagree with his eyebrows. "Give me five minutes."

"Ok." She kissed him soundly with an enormous smile before letting him go. She sat in the chair fidgeting with her fingers and bouncing her leg as she mentally calculated the time watching the others take shots of vodka in celebration.

When Jack had come back into the room and nodded at her, she took a deep breath and walked over to stand in front of Vaughn who had his back to them as he talked to Sydney and Weiss.

"Michael." She reached over and clasped his hand in hers, surprising everyone a little at what she was doing with the serious look on her face. "Tonight may be the most important night of your life thus far." She took a deep breath searching his eyes as she spoke softly. "Miracles do happen…wishes do come true."

"Irina…what are you talking about?" He suddenly felt his mouth go dry watching the tears form in her eyes and the look on her face.

"Yesterday, I awoke to a miracle standing beside my bed." She spoke slowly as everyone was now paying attention to their' conversation wondering what the hell she was talking about. "Michael, the miracle standing beside my bed was your father."

His eyes went wide then stood stone faced still staring at her. "You told me my father was dead." He spit out rapidly, not understanding.

"Yes," Irina pulled his hand up to hold it with both of hers as the tears fell. "Because I thought he was…he's alive Michael."

He heard the gasps and saw Irina's eyes leave his to look over his shoulder. Slowly, he turned around and came face to face with the father he hadn't seen since he was a little boy.

Mikhail took a step closer into the room seeing his son as a man for the first time, tears in his eyes. "Hello son."

"Dad…" Vaughn felt his eyes getting blurry as he took in the man before him, his now grey hair, the lines on his face and the wooden cane he walked with but looking into his face…hearing his voice, he knew he was staring at his father. "You're alive…"

"Yes, son." Mikhail couldn't believe the beautiful man in front of him was his little boy all grown up.

"I don't understand." Vaughn blinked back his stinging tears. "Irina told me you were killed escaping prison…you stepped on a landmine." He spoke softly in shock.

"I survived the blast." Mikhail spoke softly taking another step closer and everyone saw his leg had obviously been injured. "Rina thought I was killed…she didn't know and I didn't know she was alive either until I saw her on a magazine."

"You're alive…" Vaughn couldn't believe what he was seeing, what he was hearing watching his father walk towards him with a stiff leg. His eyes were overflowing with tears as Mikhail came to stand directly in front of him, looking at his face and finding his eyes with a smile through his own tears. "Dad?" Vaughn repeated in barely above a whisper as the tears ran off his chin, still in shock and unable to breathe.

"Yes…" Mikhail answered softly and moved slowly to wrap his arms around Vaughn.

Vaughn stood there stiffly for a moment in his father's embrace before crumbling and hugging him back as the tears fell holding onto one another for the first time in almost twenty-five years.

"I love you son…" He kissed Vaughn's head as he held him close.

Everyone else in the room who hadn't known about Mikhail stood in shock watching father and son holding onto each other.

Slowly, Irina reached her hand over to find Sydney's and squeeze it as Mikhail's eyes met hers' over Vaughn's shoulder, sharing a knowing smile of what it was like to hold your child in your arms again after so many years apart.

Sydney saw the exchange between her mother and Vaughn's father and looked over to see Irina had streams of tears rolling down her cheeks watching the scene before her. She pulled on her mother's hand until Irina was at her side and she wrapped her arm around her shoulder, pulling her head into her and kissing her mother's temple, holding her close as they cried together.

After a moment longer, Vaughn pulled back out of his father's embrace but remained just as close looking at the man before he finally smiled. "I can't believe it…you're really alive." He smiled but it soon began fading to wonder and confusion again. "If you've been alive all this time…where have you been?"

That was everyone's cue to give Vaughn and his father their space and Irina smiled softly, grasping Mikhail's forearm as she passed offering her silent strength.

Mikhail caught her arm as she was pulling away and pulled her head to his lips, kissing her face just below her temple.

"Thank you." He smiled softly as everyone watched still in shock at this evening's events. She nodded at him through her tears smiling back at Vaughn before taking Sydney's hand in her own and leading them out of the room.

"Mom did you know he was alive?" Sydney gasped when everyone had moved into the other living room, needing to hear from her own lips she didn't know.

"Sweetheart no. I didn't know he was alive until yesterday." She ran her hand over the side of Sydney's face and down her hair. "I couldn't believe what I was seeing either but there he was alive and standing in front of me."

"And then she fainted." Jack added softly, looking between Sydney and Irina.

"You did?" Sydney was immediately alarmed.

"Yes." Irina smiled as more tears fell. "Sydney the last time I saw him was just as I told you; during our escape attempt when he stepped on the mine and it exploded…then I was hit on the head and knocked out. I thought he was dead." She shook her head thinking about that day and still wondering how Mikhail had survived it with just losing his leg.

"He just showed up here?" Katya asked, her face pale at seeing her childhood friend still alive as well.

"Yes." Dmitri brought them all drinks and offered what he knew softly. "The guards told me someone claiming to be an old friend wanted to see Irina and when I looked on the monitor at the security camera. I thought I was going to faint. Jack was at the store and Irina was sleeping when I let him in. I couldn't believe it either. "

"And when I got home I went upstairs and he was just standing there, holding Lena and watching Irina sleep." Jack added the next part of the bizarre tale. "Scared me to death until I saw his face, and I knew instantly who he was." He found Irina's hand and gave it a gently squeeze. "You were so sick, we didn't want to wake you yet and scare you so we went out of the room and talked. He said he hadn't known Irina was still alive until he saw her on a Russian magazine cover somewhere in Siberia."

"I thought I saw a ghost in the hallway, or that I was hallucinating until he spoke to me." Irina wiped at her tears. "Then I fainted and when I came to…he was standing right there in front of me next to the bed."

"Well where has be been all these years?" Katya sat heavily into the couch, confused and upset.

"Siberia." Irina sighed. "He couldn't return to his family as a fugitive and he thought I'd been killed in Kashmir…so he went to live a life of seclusion. He's been living alone on a farm in Siberia for the last twenty years."

"My God." Katya rubbed her forehead between her fingers. "What happened to his leg?" She asked after a moment, already having an idea.

"He lost it from the knee down when he stepped on the mine."

Sofia handed her a box of tissues that they all passed around.

"I still can't believe he wasn't killed that day."

"This is so insane." Weiss paced behind the couch. "I mean first we find out you were KGB and then you come back from the dead… and then we find out Mike's dad was KGB and now he's back from the dead. I'm never going to believe anyone is ever 'really' dead again unless I see them die and see their bodies, and even then it's still questionable. I need another drink." He shook his head before slamming another shot of vodka.

"He's been upstairs this whole time?" It just dawned on Sydney as she turned back to her parents.

"Yes." Irina sighed softly with a small smile. "He wanted to wait…so we did what he asked."

"Wow…Mike's just got to be floored in there. Asking Syd to marry him and finding out his father's alive all in less then an hour." Weiss sat down on the edge of the sofa running his hands over his face, concerned for his friend.

Vaughn had sat absolutely still looking at his father as Mikhail recanted the details of his life in a brief overview from the moment Irina had taken him to Mexico, leading up to yesterday.

Explaining to him why he never came to find them, tell him he was still alive and Vaughn was racing through a wide variety of emotions as he listened to what his father had to say.

Remembering going through the same thing with Sydney and Irina only now it was his own life, his own father.

Mikhail was nervous and thankful at how quiet his son was sitting in front of him listening. When he came to the end of his story he waited for Vaughn's reaction having seen the emotions raging across his son's face.

"Say something…please?" Mikhail grabbed his son's fingers and squeezed.

"What am I supposed to say? What do you expect me to say? I don't 'know' what to say. I don't know how to feel." Vaughn looked down at their connected hands. "I just…need some time. To process all this."

"I don't expect anything from you, son. I know I'm in no position to…I just wanted you to know the truth. To be in your life…if you want me to. No pressure." Mikhail smiled softly. "I just can't believe the man I see before me is the same little slugger I used to hit baseballs with in our back yard."

Vaughn smiled softly at the memory, "Irina told me…that both of you passed time in prison by wondering about Sydney and I."

"Yes, we did." Mikhail felt a fresh surge of tears and he blinked them back, "She wondered if Sydney went out for her Thanksgiving Day play. What part she played; and I wondered if you made the baseball team…what position you'd played."

"I made the team that year, I was short-stop." Vaughn sniffled and wiped his tears with the back of his hand. He heard his father's sigh at finally knowing the truth behind the question that'd kept him going in prison.

"I always thought that's what you'd play. You were always quick with the glove." Mikhail shook Vaughn's hand beneath his grasp with a smile. "Michael…I know I have no right to ask and you don't have to answer me…but how is your mother?"

Vaughn took a deep breath and began to think about how his mother was going to react to finding out her husband was still alive. "She's ok." He offered his father knowing that he'd married his mother out of love and could still see it on his face. "She moved us back to Paris the year after you 'died.' I moved back to the States to attend college…I wanted to be in the CIA…like you."

"Jack told me that." Mikhail struggled to take a breath, "I'm sorry son. For not being the man you thought I was."

"Time will tell…if you are the man I thought you were, the same father I remember." Vaughn offered his honesty, "When we learned of Irina's identity, that she was a KGB agent who'd married Jack as an assignment…we all assumed that she was in no way, the woman that Sydney remembered as her mother…Jack thought that their entire relationship had been her fabricated lie…that the woman who was Irina Derevko was nothing more then a manipulative, lying murderer." His eyes staring directly into his father's, he could see how hearing those words spoken about Irina pained him. "We were wrong; it took along time to learn the truth…for Sydney, and Jack…to see she was the same loving mother, same wife that had been 'Laura Bristow.' To see Laura was Irina and Irina was Laura…there was just more to her." Vaughn paused to take a breath, "I want to believe that Mikhail Vontonavich is the same man and father as the man who was William Vaughn to see that William was Mikhail, and Mikhail was William, that there is just more to you."

Mikhail felt like Michael had just given him a tremendous gift and he knew he owed it to Irina for helping his son to see, understand their love for their families wasn't a lie. They were the same parents their children had remembered.

"How ever long it takes; I'm not going anywhere, ever again." Mikhail smiled softly and grabbed Vaughn pulling him into his embrace, holding him close. "l love you, son, more then I could possibly ever begin to say. I missed you so much. I've thought about you every hour of everyday."

"I missed you, too." Vaughn still couldn't believe his father was alive and holding him. "Dad."

Mikhail felt his breath catch and pulled his son closer hearing his admission. "You're already twice the man I ever was." He sighed with a smile, pulling back, he placed one hand on Vaughn's shoulder and the other against his cheek. He looked into his eyes for a long moment. "I have to 'thank you' for…You were able to save Rina…when I wasn't." He felt tears begin to sting his eyes again.

Vaughn knew what his father was referencing to: He was able to save the pregnant Irina by carrying her out of Sloane's prison compound and his father wasn't able to get Irina out of Kashmir. "You don't have to thank me for saving her life…I knew what she had done for you." Vaughn searched his father's eyes, "When she let herself get captured trying to give you a chance to escape. It wasn't your fault. You didn't purposely leave her behind Dad. She knew you wouldn't," He smiled softly thinking about the stubborn brunette, "That's why she took that choice away from you by letting herself get caught." He paused watching his father's reaction, "Leaving her behind wasn't an option for me, and because Irina was unconscious…she couldn't take that choice away from me." He smiled again and chuckled softly when his father did.

"She is stubborn." Mikhail smiled his warm smile, and slapped Vaughn's knee, holding onto it with his hand.

"So is Sydney." Vaughn laughed, surprised at the ease he felt already in his father's presence. "She drives me so crazy sometimes."

"Like mother like daughter." Mikhail laughed.

"I have a feeling you're talking about me with that reference." Irina entered the room smiling warmly seeing their apparent 'ease' with one another already, a good sign. "Should my ears be burning?"

"Just referencing how insanely stubborn you can be at times." Mikhail smiled as he used his cane to stand, Vaughn immediately helping his father.

Irina walked up to the both of them, happy to see the bright smiles on both their faces. "Stubborn? Me? Never?"  
She laughed pointing to herself in mock surprise, "I don't mean to interrupt but mass will be starting soon and we need to get going." She smiled softly, "Michael, if you want to stay here and catch up with your father instead, I completely understand."

"No," Vaughn immediately answered shaking his head, "Not that I wouldn't love chatting more with my Dad," He smiled over at Mikhail and he saw Irina's smile grow with the reference out of the corner of his eye, "But I take my role as Lena's Godfather seriously and I really want to be there." He smiled and Irina felt her heartstrings being tugged.

"Ok." She smiled warmly and grasped his hand, kissing his cheek.

"Mikhail, please say that you'll come to?" She reached for her old friends hand as well, still holding onto Vaughn's and surprised he let her with no awkwardness it normally held when they touched or embraced.

"Rina," Mikhail leaned over and kissed her temple with a smile, "I wouldn't miss your baby's baptism for anything tonight. She is a little miracle." He smiled cupping her cheek and running his thumb over its curve.

"Yes, she is." She smiled warmly thinking about her baby girl, then laughed as they walked out of the room to join the others. "Your son is going to make an excellent father to our grandchildren." She flashed her brilliant smile at Vaughn who was stunned and blushing.

"He did a marvelous job getting me through labor with Lena."

"Our Grandchildren." Mikhail laughed and smiled looking from Irina to his son and back again. "I can't believe we're going to share grandchildren." He laughed wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "You certainly don't look old enough to be a Babushka already."

"Oh no." She smiled over at Vaughn again, "I can't wait to spoil them rotten. I think I will be a fun Babushka." She arched her eyebrows self-reflecting as Vaughn and Mikhail laughed.

"Yes, a weekend at Babushka Irina's house, I'm positive, will never be boring." Vaughn smiled as Irina playfully hit him.

"Babushka Irina and Grandpa Jack." Mikhail smiled, trying out their titles. "Sounds good."

"So does, Grandpa Mikhail and Grandma Bella." She waggled her eyebrows laughing in happiness at having her friend back, and her daughter engaged.

"Ok ok you two! Geesh!" Vaughn shook his head rolling his eyes with a smile, "We just got engaged! It will be a little while until you can claim your titles!"

"Not too long, I hope." Irina gave Vaughn her catlike grin.

"Until then, I'm more then happy to practice my Grandfathering skills with Lena, especially the spoiling part if she's Michael's God-daughter and your daughter." He continued to smile and laugh at the look on her face."What is that look, Rina?"

"You…Grandfather to 'my' daughter just sounds so…wrong." She smiled and laughed when he agreed after hearing her say it. "How about Uncle Mikhail?"

"Agreed." Mikhail laughed and kissed her hairline just as they entered the other living room to see all the expectant faces awaiting them.

"Is everyone snuggled in?" Irina held Lena tightly to her chest beneath the layers of warm fur blankets and her own coat as they all bundled into the two sleighs bound for the church and the mid-night service.

Katya, Sofia, Sergei, Marshall, and Weiss were in the sleigh behind the one carrying Irina, Jack, Sydney, Michael, Mikhail and Lena. Irina's bodyguards riding in the fronts of each sleigh with the drivers.

_***Believe***_

"Oh, I just love Christmas!" Sofia snuggled down into the blankets, "I always feel like a little girl again. It's so magical."

"It's my favorite holiday too." Weiss smiled and laid his arm over the back of the seat with a smile. "Great food, great gifts, great laughs and great…company." He smiled and everyone laughed, as he dropped his arm around Sofia's shoulders.

Irina turned her head to the laughing voices and bright faces behind her at the excitement and fun it was to be traveling by horse and sleigh through the snow on Christmas Eve.

Everyone snuggled up under the warm fur blankets with warm hot chocolate in hand. Weiss and Sofia were snuggled into one corner and he raised his eyebrows with an enormous smile when he saw Irina smiling and laughing at him with his arm around Sofia.

"I thought Russian Orthodox followed the Julian calendar?" Marshall asked tipping his hat back on his head and it immediately fell into his eyes again. "That means their Christmas isn't until January 12th, right?"

"Yes. You are correct Mr. Flinkman." Katya smiled warmly at the cute little man she'd grown a fondness for during the days surrounding Irina's execution. "But over the last few decades, more and more Russian's have begun to celebrate with the rest of the western countries in December. Of course, we still celebrate in January, too." She laughed, "Russian's are always in the mood to celebrate and have a chance to drink more vodka." The others laughed with the face she was making. "Irina and Jack wanted to combine both traditions so, we are having Lena baptized in the Orthodox faith on the Christian Christmas Eve. The church now recognizes both nights as holy and holds mass on both days. Tonight's service is actually the International service, which recognizes Christmas traditions, songs, and customs from around the world. Highly appropriate I think, for the crowd we have gathered tonight for Lena's baptism: Italians, Americans, Russians, French…"

"And German." Weiss added his own heritage.

"English." Marshall shrugged with a smile. "I know, surprising."

The horses began to pull and they all cheered with glee as they floated over the beautiful snow covered grown, dodging between the hundreds of lit trees on Alexander's grounds, making their way to the street.

"Irina." Jack pulled her closer on their side of the sleigh, pulling the blankets up around her more. "I certainly don't think this is a good idea for your health! Alexei said no more going out into the cold winter Russian air."

"He said no 'running' in the cold winter Russian air Jack. He didn't say anything about riding in a sleigh." She challenged him with that smile he loved and shook his head, knowing it was no win situation with her. She saw him role his eyes and pinched him beneath the blankets causing him to jump and Sydney, Mikhail and Vaughn to chuckle. "It's actually a warm night and I've been a very good girl, and I've been letting you carry me all over the place."

"Letting me?" Jack pulled her in tighter to his shoulder, wrapping his arm around her shoulders with a laugh and a smile. "As if its for 'my benefit?"

"Oh admit it, you like carrying me around." She purred in her froggy voice and it just made Jack laugh.

"You are so stubborn. I don't know whether to kiss you or strangle you at times." He laughed as did everyone else in their' sleigh.

"Well I'd prefer the former." She smiled, looking incredibly beautiful in her white fur hat and coat, dark hair spilling over her shoulders as the moonlight danced about in her dark eyes.

Jack cupped her face with his gloved hands and kissed her softly on the lips earning whistling, applause and a chorus of 'oohs and awes' from behind them as Weiss, Sergei, Sofia, Marshall and even Katya cheered them on.

"All right, Jack!" Weiss yelled into the night, throwing his fist into the air while everyone laughed.

"And he's someone we're trusting with our daughter's well-being?" Jack smiled, still cupping her face as she laughed and leaned into to kiss him again quickly.

"Poor bastard." Weiss sighed, shaking his head as everyone in his sleigh laughed, "He's still got another, what is it, another week left before the six weeks of torture is up?"

"Oh, I don't know if I'd feel too sorry for him, Mr. Weiss," Katya purred with a knowing smile after seeing Jack and Irina,  
"If I know my sister, she's very 'creative'…and very 'crafty'…she's a problem solver. I'm sure they've found a way to still 'have fun." She raised her eyebrows and another hilarious round of laughter went up in their sleigh.

"Well they sound like they're having fun." Mikhail smiled to Jack and Irina as he watched the sleigh behind them.

"No doubt, laughing at my expense." Jack grumbled and felt his groin twitch as Irina slid her hand up his thigh under the blanket, making him blush as he caught Sydney smiling at her parents.

_***O Holy Night***_

The church was decorated spectacularly for the holiday and the entire service was to be conducted in the soft glow of thousands of candles and low lighting on the stage.

Before the service began, Irina, Jack, Sydney and 'The Godfathers' went to speak with the priest who would be performing the baptism explaining to them how it would go and what was expected of each of them when taking on such a 'serious responsibility.'

He asked them if it would be ok to include her baptism as a part of the celebration of Christ's birth on the same night, baptizing her as a child of God on the Eve of Jesus' birth, have her represent the baby who brought the world a 'second chance,' saving us from our sins and giving us a 'rebirth.'

They couldn't believe how fitting it was for Lena to play such a role as she had done that in their own lives so agreed happily to having her be included in such a special service.

They were to sit front row and after the children's portion of the service was over, Lena would be baptized.

The church was packed when the service began and everyone in the church roared with laughter as they watched a little boy playing a Shepard start beating Joseph over the head with his cane, tired of his pushing during their re-enactment of the nativity.

Lena slept peacefully the entire service in Irina's arms. When it was her turn to be baptized, Irina carried her up to the altar with Jack at her side and the Godparents following behind. A hush of whispers began as a wave from the front of the church to the back as everyone watched 'whom they thought' might be 'the Romanov' and her family walk up to the front.

When the priest announced the baby's name as her 'Imperial Grand Duchess Lena Alix Irina' a soft gasp from those present in the church when their suspicions had been confirmed.

They sat quietly with smiles on their faces, most with tears in their eyes at realizing how special this baby was. She was the first member of the Imperial Romanov family to be baptized in a Russian Orthodox Church since the Revolution and the fall of communism, Russia's second chance as well as the symbolic correlation of representing the baby Jesus in the service, the world's second chance.

Lena remained asleep in Irina's arms and through the entire baptism, even as she was passed from one person to the next. The only time she made any kind of noise or movement at all came when the priest held her in his hands and blessed her head with the baptismal water. She shot her arm into the air and yawned, earning a collective 'awe' from the entire church at just how precious she was in her beautiful christening gown, looking like a tiny angel in the soft glow of candle light.

As the priest performed the ceremony, he mixed in the sermon of how the birth of a tiny baby that night, in the most unlikely of places, changed the world bringing with him unlimited love and forgiveness in his tiny heart, offering us all, a second chance.

All of them having tears in their eyes when the ceremony was over at how Lena's birth and life had been much the same and represented all those things to Jack and Irina, their family.

The priest handed the baby back to Irina and when they turned around, saw that every single Russian in that church had tears in their eyes, dabbing their cheeks. They all smiled warmly at Irina and her family as they took their seats again the service resumed.

When it was over, they had to stay a moment longer to sign the documents and found when they stepped outside, every single person who'd attended the service, numbering into the hundreds, now stood out front with small candles in their hands, smiles on their faces waiting to see them off. No one made any move to harass them, stop them from getting back into their sleighs, but rather the exact opposite, remaining silent as they passed and parted in a way as Irina led the way, like Moses had done when parting the Red Sea.

When everyone was settled back into the sleighs, Irina remained standing from her position in the sleigh, smiled brightly and waved, shouting to those who'd waited to see them off, "Merry Christmas!"

The crowd's faces lit up with happiness and everyone shouted some kind of greeting back to her.

Waving as the sleighs pulled away and disappeared down the street.

"Wow…that was amazing." Marshall watched as the last tiny lights of candles disappeared, having never witnessed Russian's reactions to Irina now. "They love her, I mean they 'really…love her." He marveled with a big smile. "The way they all waited outside in the cold and snow, with the beautiful candles…the way they just parted in awe of her presence." He shook his head in wonder.

"Yes," Katya smiled warmly, "She has that affect on people."

"It's like she's already been crowned as Queen… or Tsar, I guess." Weiss was stunned by the scene as well. "Like its already been decided."

"The Russian people don't need a crown to believe in their ruler." Katya smiled turning her gaze to those who's rap attention she held, "Russian's have been looking for 'their mother,' someone to unit us all again for quite a long time. They believe they've found her, in Irina. It doesn't matter what her status may be…they'll, keep believing in her no matter what. She's brought hope to a people who've been without for along time. To them, she is their 'Mother Russia. Irina was born for this."

* * *

The younger man smiled to the young woman lying on the table as he waved the wand over her soft olive skin. When the sounds of a soft 'whooshing' could be heard he smiled to the black and white screen picking out the tiny little white bundle easily. With a smiled, he pressed off some snap shots and helped the girl to sit.

Another young woman in white helped the dark complexioned girl off the small paper covered table.

The two women smiled nervously at one another before chatting happily in their native tongue.

The man in the white lab coat began printing off data from the computer in front of him as well as making a digital recording of the sound they'd just heard. He picked up the papers and photos and walked with almost a bounce in his step down the long corridor.

Knock. Knock. Knock. He tapped softly on the door.

"Come in." The man whirled around in his chair and smiled expectantly at the young man before him. "So…what do you have for me?"

The man smiled eagerly and placed the folder before him on the desk and pressed play on the recorder as the sound filled the space. "Congratulations Mr. Sloane." He smiled brightly, answering in his thick accent, watching as Sloane picked up the black and white photograph smiling, "It's official now. You're going to be a father. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas to you too Klaus." Sloane traced the outline of the tiny baby on the sonogram with a wide grin as the doctor left the office. "Soon, my precious child…I can't wait to meet you."


	35. Chapter 35

_**AN: Thank you so much to those who are reviewing! I appreciate so much and I love hearing your thoughts as we go along in the chapters!**_

_**Music for this chapter (on repeat): I Grieve by Peter Gabriel. **_

* * *

THIRTY-FIVE

o

"All right Mom, enough of the suspense. What is this painting?" Sydney asked bright eyed the next morning when she joined everyone in the Throne Room after breakfast carrying the large paper wrapped item.

Irina's eyes immediately lit up with delight as she stood to take the painting from Sydney.

"Pierre said it and I quote, 'is worth more then you could possibly believe…' Are you sure you didn't steal the Mona Lisa?" Sydney smiled, teasing her mother and making everyone else laugh as she took her seat on Vaughn's lap.

"Yes. I'm sure I didn't steal the Mona Lisa but he was right," Her hands softly caressed the paintings edges with fascination and sheer joy, "It means a great deal to me." She turned her eyes up to find Katya's with a smile, "And you too."

Katya gave her a, curious smile in return having no idea what that painting was and Irina's peculiar behavior.

Slowly Irina slid her finger under the flap of brown paper, releasing its glue seal along the edge of the top. She grabbed a corner and again looked up at Katya with an enormous smile before tearing the paper away slowly.

Katya gasped instantly covering her mouth as tears filled her eyes. "You found it."

The woman in the painting was simply stunning.

"Is that um…who I think it is?" Marshall chewed his fingernail nervously looking to Irina and back again at the painting.

"Our mother." She smiled at him and then to Katya who was still too stunned to move.

"Wow." Weiss leaned forward to look closer, "She's so…Wow." He smiled, easily recognizing the woman as Irina's mother their striking looks hard to forget.

"Where did you? How?" Katya moved closer, kneeling down in front of the painting on the floor running her hand over the beautiful wooden frame.

"I finally found it three years ago, in Orleans after spending the last fifteen years looking for it. The owners had inherited it from their uncle who had gotten it from his wife's mother whose first husband was the son of Jean-Michael." She smiled radiantly in triumph looking over the painting and her sister's reaction.

"So, it was missing? And who's Jean-Michael?" Sydney wore a confused smile, just as in awe as everyone else staring at the portrait of Anastasia, 'her grandmother,' she smiled wider.

"Yes. It was missing." Irina shook her head with a smile, relieved to have finally found it. "When our parents fled Russia and moved to France, they lived in a small apartment in Paris."

Irina began the story with a smile, "The man below them, Jean-Michael, was a young struggling artist, who quickly became a good friend." Her smiled grew as she stared into her mother's eyes in the portrait. "He had thought, my mother to be the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen…" She laughed, her eyes dancing, "And told her often. He'd asked for two years if she wouldn't 'please' sit for him, be his muse and let him paint her portrait. She and my father were both nervous about the idea as they were 'in hiding' and no one knew my mother was still alive. She kept telling him she was too shy to sit for a portrait or have anyone see it that is how she had put him off for so long. Jean-Michael had no idea of course, who my mother really was and finally, she agreed to sit for him if he'd promise to never sell the painting. She was doing it for him, as a friend and he agreed. So, in the spring of 1920 my mother sat for this portrait. It was the first portrait she had sat for since Russia and before the Revolution. It was also that last portrait ever painted of her." She smiled warmly and everyone began to see 'why' this painting was extremely valuable; not only for sentimental reasons being Irina and Katya's mother, but because it was the first and last portrait ever painted of the Grand Duchess Anastasia. "It instantly became my father's favorite. He hung in their apartment for the first ten years of their marriage. Jean-Michael became crippled after a bout with polio and could no longer paint. He became very depressed and reclusive. Our mother saw him admiring it at their apartment one day with a smile. It had reminded him that at one point in his life, he was a brilliant painter and that his life had meaning. He had never kept any of his paintings, had sold them all so… my mother gave the portrait back to him as a gift. Our father used to talk about this painting in great detail all of the time when we were little and how 'beautiful our mother' was in this portrait, reminding him of the earlier years of their life together. He had it memorized down to the last detail."

Katya stood smiling and still in shock that Irina had actually found it. She grabbed Irina and hugged her fiercely. "Thank you."

Irina wrapped her free arm around Katya smiling, "You don't have to 'Thank' me. I thought it was time I brought it here, to hang in her favorite place now that Alexandra is finished. We've also decided to hang an identical replica in the museum with the rest of her portraits." She pulled back from the hug smiling. "So everyone can see it. We want to share after all."

"She's so beautiful." Sydney smiled getting up to inspect it further. The fact that her mother had trusted her enough to bring it here safely; was overwhelming.

"I can't believe how long Babushka's hair is!" Sofia was enchanted staring at her grandmother at the same age she is now.

"Certainly shows off those powerful Romanov eyes you inherited…" Marshall added smiling and blushing all at once looking at Sofia, remembering her response to his comment at the airport, "She's so…incredibly…beautiful…Looks like it could be a portrait of you." He turned his head and smiled to Irina shyly.

Jack agreed with Marshall's assessment. Upon first seeing the painting, his mind had immediately flashed to that night in Panama when he removed the tracker and Irina had her hair over one shoulder as Anastasia did in this painting, same dark seductive eyes. '_Irina was her mother's daughter…almost a carbon copy._' Jack smiled shaking his head. He could easily see 'why' this painting was Irina's father's favorite; how he could have memorized it down to the last detail when she looked so beautiful. Like the snapshot he had permanently engrained into his mind of Irina, from that moment she looked at him in Panama.

"Yes, she was quite beautiful, hard to forget. She was so enchanting." Mikhail smiled softly at his memory of the woman trying to remember that last time he'd seen her. "I can still see the last time I saw her in my mind so clearly; that big beautiful smile. Your father teasing her making her laugh. It was my birthday; do you remember? We all had dinner together." He looked over at Irina smiling when she nodded she did.

"Your mother burned your cake." Irina laughed, as did Katya and Mikhail, "Which was odd, since she never burnt anything. She is a domestic Goddess!"

"She was a great cook." Mikhail smiled softly, his eyes diverting to the floor thinking about her.

"She still is." Irina added softly with a smile. "She will be so excited to see you again.

"You're going to see her?" Vaughn looked at his father with questioning eyes.

"I'm going to see her today." Mikhail answered with a hint of nervousness at seeing his mother and brother again.

"I was hoping that you'd come with me. I just thought it would be nice if we went together. Rina told me how much it meant to my mother meeting you. If you don't want to, I understand."

"No," Vaughn furrowed his brows in thought speaking softly, "I will come with you. I promised her I would visit again when I had the chance." He smiled softly.

"Good. Thank you." Mikhail smiled warmly.

* * *

**_*I Grieve*_**

"Sydney," Her father's voice broke her dreams with a gentle shaking of her shoulder where she'd fallen asleep on the couch. "It's time to go." He offered her his hand and then pulled her into his arms.

"Where's Lena?"

"With Sophia in the garden." Jack nodded in the direction of the window revealing the beautiful snow covered hedges that surrounded Alexandra Palace in the winter.

The sun was shinning brightly and a warm breeze kept the air from being too cold. Sophia suddenly appeared in view of the window, the baby wrapped in a white fur blanket nestled in the crook of her arm contrasting sharply with the black she was wearing.

"Dmitri's pulling the car around front."

Sydney's mind was reeling and she felt as though her heart had just stopped watching as Jack pulled on his heavy winter coat. When he was finished he stopped and looked at her funny expression, waiting for some kind of response.  
"Ok Dad." She finally acknowledged him barely above a whisper. Jack gave her a small smile and left the room leaving Sydney firmly planted the spot beneath her feet as her eyes flew back to the window and Sophia and Lena in the garden. Her heart began pounding rapidly in her chest and she felt as though she couldn't breathe experiencing déjà vu'

_'Am I dreaming now? Or was that all a dream? Did my mother really die? Was she really executed and I just dreamt these last couple of months?' _

Sydney felt the tears burning in her eyes as she looked at Sophia who was apparently talking to the baby and began pointing to a group of geese in the sky who had waited too long to fly south for the winter. It was the same as in her dream.

_'Or was it a dream? Or is this the dream? Or is this reality?'_ Sydney shook her head in confusion as her palms felt sweaty.

"Mom?" She cried out softly to no one before running as fast as she could up the stairs trying to figure what the hell was going on and praying that she hadn't dreamt her mother's last minute save and these last few weeks. She couldn't focus on anything but one foot in front of the other as she ran.  
"Katya," She burst through the door of her mother's massive bedroom and Sydney stopped frozen, instantly with horror when she saw that her aunt 'was' standing by the window, picture frame clutched to her chest, watching the snow start to fall outside.

"No! No,no,no!" Sydney's tears turned to sobs as she dropped to her knees, realizing that she'd dreamt everything about these last couple of months, realizing that her mother was really dead. "She can't be gone! She can't be!"

Katya whirled around quickly to see what was wrong with her niece.

"Sydney who? Who can't be gone?" Katya didn't know what was wrong and started walking slowly toward Sydney, confused.

"Sydney?" Irina opened the bathroom door and stepped out, having heard someone crying she saw her daughter collapsed on her knees in front of her door, bawling her eyes out.

"Mom!" Sydney jumped up as fast as lightening and threw her arms around Irina sobbing. "You're alive! You're alive! I wasn't dreaming! You're alive!" She held Irina tighter then she ever had before and seeing Sydney's distress and hearing her frantic tone and words, Irina returned the tight embrace.

"Of course I am, Sweetheart. Shhh." Irina ran one hand over the back of Sydney's head, smoothing her hair trying to calm Sydney down as Katya came to stand by them concerned. "Sydney what happened?"  
She asked softly in her ear as she maintained her tight embrace.

"I had…I had…" Sydney sniffled through her erratic breaths, "I was sleeping…and when I woke…it was all the same."  
She cried hard again and Irina's heart felt heavy at not knowing what was making her child so upset. "Sydney, what was all the same?" She asked softly.

"Dad and Sophia and Lena and the geese. Katya standing in your room by the window with the picture frame."  
Sydney kept crying as Irina's eyes immediately went to her sister's who shrugged that she didn't know anything, holding the picture frame in her hand.

"What do you mean they are the same?" Irina pulled Sydney's head back with her hands on both sides of her head, searching Sydney's blurry eyes for understanding.

"The night of your Execution, I was sleeping," She started crying again looking at her mother in front of her, "I was dreaming but I didn't know it at the time. We were here because you died." Her face contorted as she held back a sob, "We'd just buried you and Dad woke me from where I was sleeping on the couch to say we were leaving and I asked him where Lena was and she was outside with Sophia in a white blanket showing her the geese," Sydney started to hiccup her breaths between her words as Irina tried to follow along, "I came upstairs to say 'goodbye' to Katya and she was standing right there by the window, holding that same picture frame," Sydney's eyes darted to the frame in Katya's and Irina followed, "She was…was standing by the window crying, holding that frame and watching as the snow covered your grave under the tree." Sydney sobbed and turned back to Irina, "And just now, downstairs Dad woke me up the same way telling me we were leaving and I asked where Lena was and saw Sophia in the garden with her pointing to the geese!" Her voice raised as more tears fell with the fear still inside, "I didn't know if I was still dreaming or if I was awake and just dreamed that you survived and these last few months, I didn't know so I…I ran as fast as I could up here and when I saw Katya by the window with the frame…I thought you died! That it was all a dream, these last couple of months, you were really dead!" She started sobbing and Irina pulled her tightly to her chest with tears in her eyes, realizing now, why her daughter was so frantic.

The obvious fear she still had inside her from the execution and losing her mother again.

"Shhhh." Irina tried to calm Sydney, holding her tightly as Katya's eyes filled with tears as well, "It's ok, I'm not dead. I'm here with you. Always with you, I'm not going anywhere ever again." Irina choked down her own sob, trying to stay calm. "Shhhh. Sydney, sweetheart it's ok. I'm alive. I didn't die; you aren't dreaming."

"I was watching Sophia and the baby, Sydney, I'm sorry." Katya felt helpless and sorry for her part in her niece's panic attack.

Jack walked into the room holding Lena and looking for Sydney. He stopped immediately seeing Irina holding Sydney so tightly with obvious tears in her eyes, upset and hearing Sydney still crying; his gaze rapidly shifting from them to Katya who stood clutching a picture frame and crying as well. He had no idea what the hell was going on or why Sydney was so upset.

"I was so scared." Sydney said barely above a whisper into Irina's dark tresses as she began to settle down and Irina ran her hand in circles over her daughter's back, looking into Jack's concerned eyes.

"I'm sorry, Sweetheart. I didn't mean to scare you." Irina whispered into her ear and pulled her back to wipe her tears, with a small smile. "I'm sorry." _'Sorry for leaving you twenty-two years ago and again in Panama, sorry for almost dying and leaving you alone again. Sorry because all of those things had built a terror so deep inside her daughter of abandonment she was afraid to believe her mother wasn't going to leave her again whether by abandonment or in this case…death.'_

"It's not your fault." Sydney sniffled and Irina grabbed her face and kissed her cheeks, hugging her again until Sydney had completely stopped crying.

"What's wrong? What happened?" Jack finally spoke, asking softly from where he stood by the door.

"It's ok, Jack." Irina looked deep into his eyes trying to assure him everything was okay. "Sydney's ok, we're ok. I'll tell you later."

Seeing this was obviously something neither of them wanted to talk about right now, Jack accepted that answer.

"Ok, I just came up here to see if Sydney was ready to go. Everyone else is waiting in the car already." He shifted the sleeping baby in his arms. "Do you want to still come into town with us for a little while?" They had planned on taking a short trip into town to see the city decorated for the holidays as Marshall and Weiss had never been, swinging by a restaurant on the way home bringing dinner. Mikhail and Vaughn had left hours ago to Gyrady.

"Dad, I want to stay here, with Mom." Sydney sniffled and wiped her tear tracks with her hand as she turned to face her father who was obviously concerned. She was still reeling from the panicked thought and feelings of believing Irina had really died.

Jack saw Irina nodding behind Sydney with a look that said, _'yes, go…we need to be together right now.'_

"Ok." He offered Sydney a small smile as he handed Irina the baby. "We won't be gone long."  
He kissed Irina on the lips softly and then Sydney's cheek.

When he had left the room, Irina motioned for Katya and Sydney to sit with her on the bed.

"Are you ok?" Irina reached out with her hand, clasping Sydney's forearm softly as she sat in front of her on the bed, Irina and Katya leaning back against the pillows and headboard.

"Yeah, I'm sorry." Sydney smiled embarrassed as she wiped her eyes with a tissue Katya handed her. "I just panicked at the thought that you were gone." She'd stopped just short of _again_, and Irina's heart broke with how haunted her daughter was by the past even if they'd moved forward. Some hurts, would never really go away as she learned with Jack. Even though he knew now, her reasons for leaving them, that'd she'd had no choice. It still didn't take away the memories from that time period, the hurt that went with them.

"It's ok." Irina smiled warmly, "You don't have to be sorry for anything."

"I guess its just all the media coverage and film files and photos," Sydney reached over to Irina's nightstand retrieving the latest magazines featuring Irina, "From your Execution that have reminded me how close I came to losing you again…bringing back all those old feelings." Both magazines were covering time periods when Sydney had either lost, or came close to losing her mother.

The first was about the day of Irina's extraction when Sydney was only six and the second, was covering her execution. Weiss and Marshall had picked them up for reading in the plane on the way to Russia. Sydney took a deep breath staring at the covers having read the articles herself, in magazines on her flight to and from Paris.

"It's understandable, Sydney," Irina swallowed hard staring at the face of her child so innocent and unknowing on the magazine cover. An immediate reminder staring from the photo of that child, to the woman in front of her now of all the years she'd missed in between the two faces. "Those are both, two very traumatic times in your life…in all our lives." Irina reached up and cupped Sydney's cheek, brushing her thumb over the smooth skin with a smile.

"It was kind of strange to read about that day as an adult now, I only remember it as a child." Sydney looked down at the magazine covering Irina's extraction. "Reading about the events from your point of view; I hadn't yet asked you what exactly happened to you, that day, and the days following until your imprisonment." She looked up at Irina and the corner of her mouth turned up in a mischievous grin. "Did I ever tell you how I knew you were still alive? How I figured out how you'd done it? Escaped, survived the accident? "

Irina and Katya were both surprised, especially Katya who still had no idea how Irina faked her death other then she 'died' in a car accident. In their newfound relationship, they hadn't yet gone over those details, there was still so much to learn.

"No, you've never said anything." Irina cocked her head to the side, intrigued with the story she knew was bound to be interesting if it was Sydney.

"A few months before Taipei, the second time, not the first." Sydney sighed and shifted on the bed, bending her knee and pulling it up under the other leg. "I was a fugitive on the run." She smiled and quirked her eyebrows seeing the obvious surprise and then worry on her mothers and aunts' faces.

"Why? Why were you a fugitive?" Irina felt her chest instantly tightening even though she knew these events were in the past, she couldn't help but worry about her daughter.

"Because the US government had decided 'I' was The Chosen One in Rambaldi's prophecy, which I knew nothing about at the time," She narrowed her eyebrows, wishing she'd never heard the man's name, "And because The Chosen One was deemed dangerous with the way the prophecy read, that bringing the 'world utter desolation' part scared them, I think." She laughed and Irina smiled shaking her head at her daughter, "Anyway, so they wanted to lock me up and throw away the key. Dad and Vaughn broke me out and I was on the run. I needed to get to Mt. Sabasio and 'prove' to everyone, I wasn't The Chosen One."

"Why did you have to go to Mt. Sabasio to prove you weren't The Chosen One?" Katya asked confused, having only heard the brief overview of this crazy Rambaldi Prophecy and her family's role and especially her sister's part in it.

"Because the Prophecy reads that The Chosen One will never have witnessed a sunrise over Mt. Sabasio, so the easiest way of proving I wasn't her was by going there." Sydney ran her hair behind her ear and lay backwards, propped up on one elbow sprawled across the bed in front of them.

"Ah, ok. So you've never been to before then? If you're The Chosen One?" Katya turned her attention to Irina with rapt attention finding all of this more and more interesting.

"No, I haven't been and not for lack of trying. Something always seems to happen that keeps me from fulfilling my plans." Irina shrugged and adjusted Lena in her arms so that she was now sleeping against her chest.

"See! That's because _you_ are The Chosen One and were never meant to see it." Sydney smiled at Irina, "Fate kept intervening to keep you away."

"Ok, so you were on the run. Then what?" Irina got them back on the original track.

"So, I was on the run and spotted by police and 'one hell of a' car chase ensued with the police and FBI all over Los Angeles." She smiled again, loving the surprise and horror she was able to evoke out of her Mom and Katya.

"She _is_ your daughter!" Katya mocked whispered under breath nudging Irina and making them all laugh.

Sydney sighed, sobering up with what was coming next. "The only way I was going to be able to escape was to drive off the docks into the ocean. So I did." She looked softly at her mother as Irina's eyebrows shot up but remained silent. "I knew they would be waiting for me to surface if they believed I escaped the car and was still alive. I knew I had to wait a long time so they would think I drowned."

Irina found it hard to swallow and Katya's eyes were racing back and forth between her niece and sister.

"I knew I needed air to do that, so, I thought about how you would have done it that night of the accident if you really were still alive. Suddenly, I knew." She smiled softly to Irina, her eyes never leaving her mothers. "I swam out the window and breathed air out of the tires for over ten minutes; and while I was down there waiting, I just knew. I knew you were still alive. That was how you faked your death. That's how you did it, didn't you?" Sydney's eyes searching her mother's, waiting for the verbal confirmation she knew she didn't need having watched Irina's reactions while she was telling the story.

"Yes." Irina answered softly, shocked that her daughter had done the same thing and in doing so, had realized her mother was still alive.

"I surfaced after I knew they were gone and went straight to Dad." Sydney continued softly with the story, "Told him I knew, without a doubt that you were still alive and how I knew that. He argued you couldn't be, there had been an investigation into your death for just that purpose, to see if you had really died or just used it to escape; they'd told him you were dead." She twirled the edged of Lena's blanket between her fingers thinking about the look on her father's face when he realized her mother was still alive. "He was arguing that you were dead because ,I could see, the look on his face like all the wind had been sucked right out of him. The thought of you still being alive after all these years," She knew she didn't need to elaborate on what state her father would be in to her mother, "Well, you know Dad. He had to know for sure. So he broke into the records room and found the file of the investigation into your death, he'd never been allowed to see before. They'd lied to him." Sydney found it hard to swallow seeing the look of anguish running through her mother's eyes, "The file said you were alive. They knew you were still alive but they lied to Dad because they knew how much he loved you." She paused, speaking slowly, "They didn't want him to go after to find you. In those files, were the names of the agents that had been assigned to investigate your death, the agents that lied to him." Sydney looked down to the blanket in her fingers and then back up to her mother, "Sloane was one of them. He knew all those years that you were still alive, watching Dad going through hell over not only finding out about, who you really were, but dealing with your death, which was equal anguish because he still loved you; and Sloane had let Dad believe you died."

The '_what ifs'_ came roaring to both Sydney and Irina's minds with the thought _'if only'_ Jack had known she was still alive then. _Would he have saved her from Kashmir? She would have never had to go through that? Sydney would have had her mother… Would he have left the CIA? Would he have used Project Christmas on Sydney?_ She probably wouldn't have become a spy. Irina probably wouldn't have isolated herself within her organization. _Oh the 'if only' game._ It was dangerous to play and meaningless.

"Sloane. I can't imagine why I'm not surprised by that." Irina hissed with sarcasm.

"Well, he and Dad had words after that, I think. Sloane spinning Dad some bullshit answer why he believed it was better for Dad to believe you'd died." Sydney added obviously annoyed. "But, I was 'intent' on finding you after I realized you were alive and Dad was adamantly against it trying to say that if you were alive all these years and didn't contact us, your life as 'Laura' was, just a mission, nothing more. That you never loved us…me." She swallowed hard noticing the tears slowly start forming in her mother's eyes. "He said he didn't want me to set myself up for the eventual disappointment I would have if I found you because the person you were now wasn't the mother I knew. He said it was better to remember the lie of the woman I knew… then the reality of who you really were." She stopped twirling the blanket and found Irina's fingers instead, holding them in her own for support. "Obviously that's not the truth but we had no way of knowing at that time. Dad absolutely refused to help me find you so in my desperation, I went to Sloane." She sighed thinking about that time frame, "Up until that time frame, where I learned you were still alive…I _hated_ Sloane for what he did to Danny and he knew it but I knew, he had to know something about who 'Irina Derevko' was if he'd been assigned to the team investigating you. That he could tell me something and if I wanted to find you, I had to go to him for help. Believe you me, that about killed me going to 'him' of all people for help." She mock gagged and made Irina smile, "But, finding you was worth it so he and I struck a deal. I would do what he asked and he would help me and together we'd both get what we wanted…because he was looking for 'The Man," Sydney smiled emphasizing Irina's name and earning another smile, "And all things Rambaldi and I was looking for you. At that time, we thought that Khasinau was 'The Man' and that you were working for him so, it was in both our interests' to work together."

"Somehow, I don't think your father was pleased when he learned of your agreement with Sloane." Irina spoke with an arched eyebrow, as she ran her hand over Lena's head.

"Oh no. Dad was livid." Sydney rolled her eyes with a deep laugh, "But he couldn't do anything about it, since I was hell-bent on finding you."

"And you did." Irina sighed, "And the first thing I did was tell you I should have killed you when you were a baby and shot you in the shoulder." She said rapidly turning her gaze from Sydney and blinking rapidly at the tears threatening to fall.

Katya's eyes were wide in horror at Irina's revelation. She knew that her sister had shot Sydney at some point, saving her from Cuvee after capture, but never knew all of the details surrounding it. She certainly never knew what that the first words Irina spoke to her daughter in over two decades were telling her how she could have killed her when she was a baby. Basically telling Sydney she had meant nothing to her from the moment she was born.

_'It must have killed Sydney, to hear that coming from her mother after wanting to find her for so long, and Irina, for having to say it…'_

"God that was terrible…I'll never forget that look on your face." A tear finally escaped and she quickly brushed it away.  
"And knowing now, that you were looking for me then…what a shock that must have been to you... I bet in that moment you'd wished I had died." Irina turned her gaze back to Sydney's with sorrowful eyes.

"Actually no, I didn't think that. Which I'll admit, is even surprising to me." Sydney shook her head in thought,  
"I think I was too stunned to form coherent thoughts at that time. I think in the span of five seconds my emotions ran the gauntlet. The internal dialogue went from,_ 'oh my God, she's alive, I'm so happy, she's standing in front of me, she's still so beautiful'_ to, _'holy shit, she's 'The Man,'_ _she's looking at me like I disgust her, she wishes she'd killed me as a baby, she never loved me, she's holding me hostage, she hasn't seen me in years and all she wants is information, she's the one who kidnapped and tortured Will, I'm her prisoner, she's got a gun, she must really be evil_,' and then to, _'well fuck her I'm not giving her anything_!" She smiled as she exaggerated her recanting of telling Irina to fuck off mentally, squeezing her mother's fingers with a small laugh, finding it laughable now, knowing her mother didn't mean it but was saving their lives and earning a tiny twitch of a smile from Irina's mouth. "Then you shot me and it was shock, _'my mother shot me! She actually shot me, holy-fucking-shit that hurts_,' then back to disbelief of '_she shot me! Christ, that was a 'warning?_!"

The way she was humorously recanting it, earning her chuckles from Katya and finally a small smile from Irina, which was her intent.

"When you left the room it was, '_I'll never talk so that means she'll come back and kill me, I have to get out of here',_ which I did somehow by blanking every emotion out of my mind other then survival mode on adrenaline. I called Dad, didn't tell him anything, only asked if Vaughn made it to the plane," She paused, "He hadn't, so I went back to your lab to try and find him much to Dad's dismay."

"You went back to the lab before you got medical treatment?" Irina grasped her arm, immediately concerned and horrified that her daughter escaped them, shot and bleeding only to head straight back to their lab without treatment.

"I had to find Vaughn. I wasn't leaving without him." Sydney said firmly, looking into her mother's eyes. "But, he wasn't there so I met Dad and Will on the plane. Dad immediately started stitching me up and asked who shot me. I told him it was you and that you were actually 'The Man." She sighed before continuing, "Then I think we both kind of sat there in disbelief, especially Dad because for all the ranting he did to me of you weren't the mother I remembered, in his own heart and mind, he knew you did love me. So when I told him it was you that shot me, you were the head of this large organization…I think it kind of floored him trying to see 'Laura Bristow' the wife and mother he remembered, as 'The Man' and someone so evil she'd shoot their own child. Will, poor Will," She smiled shaking her head thinking about her poor friends remarks on the plane, "He was 'really' confused because he knew nothing about you, except your name was Laura, you were a teacher and loving mother that I adored and you died when I was little, so when he suddenly heard that you were alive, had been that one that shot me and had him kidnapped and tortured he was just as floored as Dad and I. The flight home was fairly silent." She shrugged her eyebrows and bit her lip. "What about you?" She suddenly asked Irina, realizing she had no idea what her mother must have been going through then. She'd been reading the journals her mother gave to her, but these events and how Irina felt about them would be near the end and Sydney was no where near there yet. She was only up to the time frame of nine years old in her reading.

Katya remained absolutely silent, listening to the details of their traumatic reunion.

"Well," Irina swallowed the dry lump that had formed in her throat. "Before I walked into that room, I had to take a deep breath stuff every emotion I was feeling violently down knowing I had to do this, and do it quick if I was going to do it. I'd deal with my own emotions later but at that moment, it was about getting you the 'hell out of there' and not getting myself killed in the process." She took a deep breath and a small smile came to her lips. "My thoughts were much the same as your initial thoughts when I walked into that room and saw you. _'My baby, so beautiful, all grown up, sitting right in front of me, God I want to hold her in my arms, tell I love her and never stopped_," She found Sydney's hand again and held it in her own, running her thumb over the back for comfort. "Then it was, fear and horror, worry. You were bleeding, and then anger for having to do, to say, the things I was having to say, seeing your face fall as I told you I could have killed you as a baby. Your tears about killed me, I was just going through the motions and saying the script I'd rehearsed in my head from the moment we captured you and I knew I had to find a way to get you out." She took a deep breath and blinked back the fresh tears starting to form in her eyes. "I knew I had to say things that would provoke you quickly, so that I could do it and get out as fast as possible because every moment in that room with you was torture under the circumstance. So, when you took the bait, I fired…and almost lost it right there." She batted quickly at a fallen tear and forged ahead, "I was so thankful that Cuvee and Khasinau were so busy being impressed that I actually shot you, they didn't hear the tremor in my voice when I told you to '_think about it, I'd come back later_." Irina's voice trembled again as she spoke and batted at another fallen tear frustrated. Her version wasn't as humorous as Sydney's because she was the mother and no matter her reasons, destroying her child in that moment would haunt her forever.  
"I walked back into the hallway and when the door was shut, Khasinau slapped me on the back with a smile and said, '_Well done Irina. Well done_.' Like the slimy bastard was happy with the proof that they'd been able to re-educate me all those years before and make me the heartless machine they saw in front of them." Her tone became harder as her anger began to rise. "You escaped and they left the office to find out what they could. I went into the bathroom, shut the door, and immediately started vomiting, sick with what I'd done, what I'd said. I couldn't stop crying or shaking." Irina's tears fell again, one by one down her cheeks and dripping onto Lena's hair.

Sydney's eyes shot up in surprise learning just how upset her mother had been for what had happened; her actions and words towards Sydney making her physically ill even though she was doing it to save Sydney's life.

"I vowed right there in that bathroom that I would make them pay for forcing me to do that to my child. There were so many horrible things they'd done to me over the years and deserved to die for, but that was the last straw. Everything I'd compartmentalized and hid down deep about you for so many years erupted after that." Irina smiled softly through her tears at Sydney, "When I saw you in Barcelona, realized you were a double agent and then saw the look in your face when you turned around. You thought I was going to kill you and when I fired seeing that instant flash of fear, you thought I'd shot you and then the confusion at why I would shoot Khasinau and not you again."

"Oh yeah, when I heard your voice and saw Khasinau smiling before I turned around." Sydney shook her head with a small smile, "I thought for sure I wasn't walking out of that one. Then you fired, and for an instant thought you had shot me again and then you smiled at me, and I realized you'd killed Khasinau… Yeah, I was very confused."

Irina shook her head remembering how cute Sydney's face looked in her moment of confusion as she'd smiled at her for the first time in twenty-one years.

Sydney took a deep breath and sighed, rolling forward slightly onto her elbow.  
"And then when you ordered me to my knees, hands on head, face to the ground. I thought for sure you were going to kill me Execution style. But instead, you picked up the case and told me, _'Truth Takes Time.'_ Which stunned the hell out of me, and confused me even more as to what that could possibly mean on top of not killing me," Sydney smiled softly with a soft chuckle, "And when I looked up, you were gone. Just like that."

"In that moment, I knew I had to find a way of explaining myself to you someway, somehow, it didn't matter. I knew I had to see you again. I'd already planned to turn myself into the CIA, finding out you were an agent with them too. It all fell into place," Irina smiled at Sydney. "I guess that was 'fate' working again…even if it was working in strange ways."

"And here we are today!" Sydney smiled laughing that deep giggle that Irina loved to hear as she rolled over onto her back on the bed.

"That was all very…fascinating." Katya finally spoke using a serious tone as if in thought before breaking into a beautiful smile of her own. "I think, I am very happy that I didn't go into espionage and stayed in the safer realm of modeling. Where the only danger I was faced with was breaking a heel on the runway and falling face first into the crowd."

Irina and Sydney both broke out into laughter as Katya smiled madly at her joke. Sydney rolled over and onto the magazines that lay beside her, she sat up and placed them on the nightstand with the others. The Russian one on the top of the pile caught her eye. She smiled instantly recognizing the photo of her mother from the night in Moscow at the ballet and realized this was the magazine that Mikhail had seen that led him here.

"So this is the magazine that led Mikhail to you?" Sydney pulled it off the nightstand, smiling as she looked at her mother on the cover.

"Yes." Irina sighed and adjusted Lena thinking about how fate really had worked out to bring all these little things together. Like, if Irina hadn't been kidnapped by Sloane, Jack and the CIA wouldn't have come to save her, she wouldn't have been arrested and sentenced to death, Putin wouldn't have had to reveal who she really was in order to save her life, the press wouldn't have gone crazy with publicity and snapped that photo and Mikhail would have never seen it, wouldn't know she was still alive and he wouldn't have come home to his family, yes fate was turning out to be interesting. Sydney read the headlines on the cover asked her mother the same question her father had.

"Mom, how do you feel about all of this? I mean, the entire Russian population seems to want the monarchy brought back with you on the throne in the official capacity. But how do you feel about that? Both of you?" She looked over her shoulder to Katya and then flopped back on the bed propping herself up, intent on listening to what they had to say.

"Well, ideally, I would like to keep things the way they are." Irina spoke softly, stroking Lena's soft hair, watching how the tiny mow-hawk would instantly bounce back into place after her fingers had passed. "With Vladimir as President and me working with him behind the scenes."

"Do you think that's best?" Katya turned slightly, crossing her arms over her chest, eyeing her sister intently, as curious as Sydney to see how Irina felt about everything. "I mean people know now…that you're the one with the 'real' power behind the decision making."

"Well, its been working well the way things are set up now. Why change what works?" She looked up to Katya, "We've accomplished a lot of things over the last decade."

"Yes, you have." Katya smiled and nodded agreeing, but she could see her sister avoiding how important her role really is. "But think of how much more you can accomplish with a united people behind you Rina. Russians are tired of being loners; they want to feel the pride and love that comes from feeling like they are all family. A family with the same 'Mother," She smiled turning on her side and resting her face against her fisted hand, propping herself up like Sydney and Irina felt like they were closing in on her. "A 'Mother' who will take care of them, lead them, someone who will make them feel, as though they are apart of something greater then themselves again they are yearning for it."

Irina didn't respond only looked down to Lena's hand who, was holding onto her finger tightly in her sleep.

"If I allow myself to think about it," Irina ran her thumb over the tiny fingers around her forefinger. "Honestly, Iit terrifies the hell out of me."

Sydney blinked in shock. She hadn't known her mother to be 'terrified' of much, if anything. Neither did Katya.

"Why Rina? Why does it terrify you?" Katya reached her hand over and placed it lightly on Irina's forearm. "You are already the leader."

"Yes. But I am 'behind the scenes.' No one knew who I was or what I was doing. Less pressure without millions of eyes on you watching your every move. With Vladimir as the official leader, I can still keep my private life." She looked up finally, meeting Katya's eyes. "And think what that would mean for your life, and Sergei's and Sophia's." She turned her eyes to Sydney, "And what that would mean for you life and your father, for Lena and now Vaughn. A whole lot of responsibilities and demands come with being a member of a ruling Royal Family."

"Your choices in life become limited. If I am behind the scenes, I am the only one that's life is affected, not my families'. Your father, you and Vaughn would all for certain, have to leave the CIA. You can't work intelligence for one country and be the ruling royalty of another." She raised her eyebrow stressing her point.

"I'm leaving the CIA as soon as we get Sloane and Cuvee." Sydney responded quietly and saw the flicker of surprise in Irina's eyes, "I'm sure Dad will too. He's only there because I am and Vaughn too. We want to finish what we started with Sloane and of course, find Cuvee and make him pay then we're done. So that makes no difference."

"Your every move will be followed and photographed, documented. You won't have much of a private life." Irina raised another point; still internally thrilled to hear her daughter say for certain that once they had the Sloane and Cuvee she was leaving this dangerous life.

"I don't have a 'private' life now. The CIA follows me, documents everything I do so that won't be a hard adjustment." Sydney bounced back at her, trying to dissolve Irina's rebuttals and get to the real truth of why she didn't want to be the official ruler of Russia.

"And I agree with Sydney." Katya smiled seeing what her niece was doing, "It wouldn't be that hard of an adjustment for me or the children either. I have been photographed and had my private life invaded since birth. We both did as our mother's daughters." She challenged Irina with her look and one eyebrow narrowed.

"Sophia as a model too, is used to being in the public eye, having her photograph taken. I really don't think she'd mind," Katya laughed at how attention hungry her daughter was, "And Sergei certainly wouldn't mind. He has always gone with the flow of things. My family wouldn't be as affected as yours, you know as the 'spare' mostly reaping the perks from it," she laughed smiling. "Its the 'heir' and her family as the direct descendents, that the majority of the responsibility and sacrifices fall upon. That is why this is up to you, Rina."

"Sydney is the Tsarevicha Katya, don't you see?" Irina looked expectantly at her sister, stressing her words, "She wasn't raised to be the next ruler of Russia. She was raised as an American, who became a spy working for the CIA of the United States of America. I don't see how that could work exactly to have an American spy take over as the ruler of Russia? It just won't work…I'm sorry Sweetheart." She looked over quickly to Sydney finding her hand and squeezing it with apologetic eyes, hoping she didn't just crush her daughter anymore, but it was the truth.

"Mom," Sydney smiled softly seeing how concerned her mother was at the possibility of hurting Sydney's feelings with what she said, "Don't apologize my feelings aren't hurt." She laughed and returned the hand squeeze. "I've already thought about that and I agree with you with for the same reasons. I wouldn't want to take over after you." She added softly, smiling shyly. "But, I've been thinking about it, more in the last couple of days and especially after last night that…it makes sense for Lena to take over after you and before you interrupt," She smiled holding her hand up seeing Irina's shocked face about to say something, "Hear me out. Please?" Seeing her mother nod she continued, smiling, as she looked at the tiny baby asleep on Irina's chest, "I believe that Lena has a bigger purpose in this world. If you think about, all that she survived to get here and how miraculous that all was. All of what she represents to our family, how she brought us all back together, our second chance." Sydney smiled softly, "When the priest was talking about the baby Jesus last night and referencing him with Lena during her baptism, I couldn't help but think how alike they really are. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that Lena is equal to that of Jesus but to us, to Russia. She is in our own way, our little Savior. Jesus was conceived and born in the most unlikely of experiences and places, so was Lena." Her smile grew as she laughed softly. "You and Dad hadn't been together in what, twenty-one years as far as I know, unless there were other incidences I don't know about while you were in custody?" Her eyebrows furrowed as she gave Irina a stern suggestive look, teasing her.

"No, there were no other 'incidences." Irina laughed, stressing Sydney's use of 'incidences' when describing her parents' love life.

"Just checking," Sydney grinned smugly, "So, the night she was conceived was the first night you two were together after all that time apart. That alone was a highly unlikely miracle, an immaculate conception. She was born in one of the most 'unlikely places' I've ever heard of: a CIA cell." She laughed thinking about that insane day of Lena's birth. "Her birth united so many people who were there that day and changed Kendall's entire perspective on you and believe me, that was no 'small' miracle!" Sydney laughed, as did Irina. "She was my powerful 'tool' of persuasion to get President Bush to meet with Putin and let's face it, without her I would not have been able to make such an impact on his conscience, to call Putin and give you a pardon." She cocked her eyebrow and shrugged with a smile, "She's the one that brought you out of the coma after your execution and back to the land of the living, with her strong little loving heart. Her presence in our lives," She paused, "Has completely changed our lives and for the better. Last night, she became the first Romanov to be baptized in an Orthodox church since Alexsei and the Revolution. You saw what that meant to the people; they were all moved to tears because they are finding hope for their future through her. For those couple of hours, her tiny presence united hundreds of people." Sydney smiled, leaning over to run the backs of her fingers of her sister's soft hair. "She's already got a lot going for her that would make her an excellent person to follow in your rather large shoes," She looked up smiling to her mother's eyes, knowing just how massive her mother's touch on Russia had been and would be in her lifetime. "For one, she's going to have you as her mother her whole life. You aren't going anywhere, Dad's not going anywhere. She'll have both parents and a 'fantastic' older sister," She laughed, "To guide her, take care of her, and most importantly…love her unconditionally all the time. If you are the Tsar, she'll grow up watching you…learning from you over the thirty years, however long your reign is. She'll be ready to take over, fill those big shoes, and walk in your footsteps. Since she will be so young when she takes over, she'll have a nice long reign as the ruler of Russia and in doing so, will be able to accomplish many things for a country that will be hers'…because she's going to be raised with such a strong Russian influence. I'll be your American daughter, she can be your Russian." Sydney smiled accentuating her accent as she'd said the entire thing in Russian. "I think it makes perfect sense. I think you were born for this, and so was she. After all, you are 'peace' and she is the 'light."

"I couldn't agree with you more Sydney." Katya smiled brightly, impressed with her niece as she'd been having some similar thoughts but Sydney had put them into excellent context.

Irina had listened intently to everything Sydney had been saying but she also couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sense of sadness for the baby in her arms if 'she' chose that path for her.

"Sydney, you make an excellent argument, but if I did this, if we decided that Lena would be the Tsarevicha, I would be taking away her choices in life, I'd be deciding her future." Irina shook her head at the thought, turning her intense gaze from the baby to Sydney, "You of all people know what its like to have your choices in life taken away from you. I don't want to do that to her. I don't want my choices for my own life affecting hers like they have yours. It wasn't fair to you to be thrust into espionage and it won't be fair to her to be in the limelight all the time growing up royal!"

"But think about it, Mom. She's already 'never' going to know a time when you 'weren't 'the Romanov' or the 'Empress of Russia' whether you take on the role officially or not." Sydney added softly, Katya nodding she agreed, and Irina looked defeated having not thought about that until just now.


	36. Chapter 36

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Fever by Peggy Lee, Lady by Lenny Kravitz.**_

* * *

THIRTY-SIX

o

"Yes, you're right, I guess. But, I would still rather have her growing up without so much pressure on her…to have some semblance of a normal childhood and life." Irina stroked Lena's cheek wistfully. '_Isn't that what every parent wants? It's what she wanted for Sydney, too.'_

"Mom, let's face it. We will never be defined as people in the 'normal' category per other people's definitions, I don't see how that's going to change now." Sydney laughed, shaking Irina's foot with her hand, "What is normal anyway? Isn't 'normal' for you, what you make it? I mean, my life to me is 'normal'…it may not seem normal to other people, but its normal to me and vice versa. I don't know anything else. Lena won't know anything else but life as the daughter of the Russian Tsar. She won't ever know a life outside that fact. That will be her normal. The attention, the press, all of that, will be her normal and it will be 'ok,' because she will never no a life outside that." She smiled softly to her mother, seeing Irina was obviously very upset with this concept, this notion.

"But there is a very big difference in growing up the daughter of someone like myself, continuing to run things like I am now or growing up as the Tsarevicha under an Imperial Russia." Irina paused, her long fingers and hand palming the tiny head of her sleeping daughter in a protective manner, "And I would rather have her growing up under less pressure with the way I am doing things now."

"This is and has been a tremendous responsibility for you. One I don't envy at all," Katya picked up her sister's hand and kissed the back of it with a smile as she lay beside her. "A role you've accepted and taken on without whining or complaining and you are doing a fantastic job! Mama would be very proud you." She smiled up into Irina's dark eyes, "I understand your reasons perfectly, Rina, and whatever you decide, I'll be here to support you all the way."

"So will I." Sydney sat up and kissed Irina's cheek, before carefully wrapping her arms around her neck so she didn't squash Lena when she hugged their mother.

Irina kissed her temple with a smile as Sydney pulled back.

Sydney dropped a light kiss to Lena's head adding, "But I still think our 'remarkable baby' here, is destined for greatness. She just glows as does anyone who's around her. She's the perfect baby." She kissed her again, "She hardly every cries, never spits ups, sleeps like a champion and is pretty content in anyone's arms and the fact that she evokes emotions other then rage out of Kendall, whom I used to think ate babies for breakfast," She laughed making Irina smile, "I say is certainly something spectacular. Whether she grows up and becomes the next Tsar or becomes a teacher," She smiled at Irina, thinking about the other occupation her mother once held and was fantastic at, "We're all going to love her just the same and I'm sure she'll be happy either way." Irina grabbed Sydney's dimple grinned face with one hand and pulled her face in to kiss her quickly on the lips wearing a tremendous smile.

"I love you." She pulled back staring into her daughter's big brown eyes. "I wonder all the time how I got so lucky, so blessed in having you for my daughter, especially after the life I've led." Irina kept her hand against Sydney's cheek looking at her daughter's beautiful face, "Like the devil giving birth to two angels. I didn't think God would grant me such miracles…" She smiled shyly, "But I think he knew, you would salvage what was left of my soul. You, Sydney Ann, are the reason I changed who I used to be, my reason to start over new." Irina was speaking from her heart. She wanted to make sure Sydney knew, just how important she was in her life. "Lena may be my second chance, but you are my saving grace."

"Mom," Sydney said in the exact same way the day Irina had first told her that she loved, because her mother knew she wasn't coming back from Panama. She felt the tears welling in her eyes, hearing her mother's words.

Irina looked deeply into Sydney's pooling eyes and kept her hand on her chin, keeping her from turning away, knowing her daughter didn't think she deserved to hear this but she did and so much more.

"I don't deserve either of you."

"Yes, you do." Sydney smiled her famous dimpled smile that melted Irina's heart. "And you're not evil and certainly not the devil." She laughed making Irina and Katya laugh as well. Sydney remembered a time when she had thought otherwise, even calling her mother such when talking about Sloane. That _'if the devil herself wanted to help bring him down, then that was fine by her.'_ Of course she never really 'believed' her mother to be that evil, she just wanted to because it was easier to take away the pain of betrayals from someone who was evil then, from someone who loved you.

"Right. Not a bad person. Just sometimes I do bad things." Irina shook her head, laughing at the honesty in that statement.

"And I'm no angel." Sydney waggled her eyebrows, thinking about all the things that she'd done.

"You are to me." Irina smiled speaking in her warm motherly voice and Sydney sighed with happiness.

"I've been meaning to ask you about 'toaster fire' that led to us staying at the Summit, and me getting sundaes every night for a week." Sydney said with a mischievous curious grin.

"Toaster fire?" Katya narrowed her eyebrows in confusion having never heard such story, but then again if it had to do with Irina's life before their reconciliation. She still had a lot to learn about.

Irina felt like a deer in headlights and that slight moment of panic, hesitation confirmed for Sydney there was something more to that story they hadn't talked about on that train.

"When Sydney was four years old, Jack came home from work late one night and we'd started drinking some kind of crazy Indian rum he brought home," She replied smoothly, tucking her hair behind her ear as if it were no big deal, "He was hungry and tried to make toast in our broken toaster. We forgot about it and started a small fire. There was so much smoke we had to move out of our house for a week." Her eyes and posture, the tone of her voice acting as if she were just telling a story about a trip to the store. She realized her mistake of 'too little enthusiasm' when she saw the gleam in Sydney's eyes and her smile growing.

"When we got home from India, I went over that story, that moment on the train with you and Dad and analyzed it, can't help it, job hazard and the fact I was so excited to have a partial memory back from before the Project Christmas crap of our life together." She shrugged and continued on smiling madly,"Especially after seeing Dad actually smile talking about this story, both of you actually, over this event from our past, and at each other for the first time in twenty-one years." Sydney smiled brightly, knowing she had her mother now as Irina bit her lip, something she did when she was unsure she was going to say, "I got to thinking about the sundaes, and how excited I was then to get those sundaes every single night for a week. But then I realized, I was only four years old. _'What parent lets there kid have sundaes every night of the week unless they felt guilty about something_?" She saw Irina twitch and put her hair behind the other ear. '_Yep, definitely guilt_.' She thought to herself with a smile that grew. "So I started really thinking about that week and the events surrounding it. Trying to remember just what happened that would make you two feel guilty enough that you'd let me eat that much ice cream. It wasn't guilt over having to move out from the fire because that really wasn't anything to feel guilty over." Sydney cocked her head to the side, studiously analyzing her mother's behavior. Her mother was a master; that she would give her but with her previous analyzing of the situation, she already knew the guilt. "And then I remembered." She said and Irina bit hard on her lip."Dad had been gone on some trip somewhere and I had made him a painting of Cookie Monster, our little conversation about Cookie Monster when we were in Moscow helped me remember this detail," She offered as a factual statement before continuing and Irina wanted to kick herself for her part in helping to retrieve the fact, "I was so excited to give him that Cookie Monster painting when I woke up in the morning I left it on the table to give to him at breakfast. But obviously, I was awoken in the middle of the night when the fire department came and we went to the hotel. I asked what happened to my Cookie Monster painting for Daddy and he told me that he took it to work with him. Looking back now, I can still see his face when he told me that…he had that twitch in his eyebrow that I know now, happens when he isn't tell me the whole truth about something. So my question, Mom, is what really happened to my painting?"

Katya didn't need the answer to the question; she already knew and was trying to hold in her laugh by biting her lip as hard as she saw Irina doing. This was a memory that had made both of them smile, Jack had been away on a trip, they'd been drinking rum, they forgot about the toast, Sydney's painting had disappeared that was on the kitchen table, her parents felt so guilty about something they let her eat ice cream for a week. It wasn't hard to piece together with all these little facts and she wasn't even a spy! Her only thought now was, '_Had Sydney really put it together and was making her mother sweat intentionally? Wanting her to admit it? Or had she missed the entire boat of the story, concentrating so much on the fact she'd realized they'd lied about the painting going to work with Daddy, instead of what could have possibly happened to it that they would lie?'_

"Sydney," Irina said after a long moment of silence, "Your father had been gone to India for more then a month. We were in our mid-twenties. We got drunk on rum in the kitchen," She was saying all these details slowly, hoping Sydney would pick up on it and stop her but she didn't. She really had missed the 'point bus.' "Where your painting was on the table." _'No still wasn't getting it, some spy she was!'_

"Yes, we've gone over those details. So, what happened to my painting?" Sydney asked impatiently with a curious smile.

"Sydney, the answer to that question lies in the category of, '_stop giving me mental pictures_,' along with 'how' your father actually planted the passive tracker." Irina finally cracked out a smile with her deviant eyes and Sydney's eyes went wide.

_'Yep. It was the latter.'_ Katya burst out laughing. '_Sydney had missed the boat.'_

Sydney's brain raced through the details of the story she'd just given and then the way her mother had recanted them slowly to her.

"Oh God! You guys did it on the kitchen table on top of my Cookie Monster painting!" She yelled in horror then fell backwards onto the bed, covering her eyes trying to shake the mental image and Irina and Katya died with another round of laughter. Finally, Sydney sat up smiling, blushing crimson red, but smiling, "No wonder that memory made you both smile! You naughty parents you!" She mock scolded Irina and another round of laughter rang through the bedroom as Sydney laughed too. "No wonder you felt guilty! I thought you guys spilled rum on it or something not…" She shook her head again of the mental image as her mother and aunt laughed more, "Shame. Shame." She shook her head like she was disgusted all the while trying to hold back her smile.

"Your father and I actually talked about this the other night and how happy we were that day in the train, that you just 'zoomed' by the details and went straight to the ice cream." Irina smiled, as her body shook with laughter. "It was some night. If you weren't my daughter I'd tell you the details."

"Well, I'm not your daughter, tell me the details!" Katya poked Irina with her finger. "If the tracker story is as hot as it is when you're middle-aged, I can only imagine the details of this rendezvous when you were in your mid-twenties! Details, details, details!" She bounced on the bed like a playful puppy with glee.

"Not while Sydney is here! Are you crazy?" Irina looked at Katya then to Sydney who was once again stunned and blinded by the mental images those thoughts invoked. "She would like to keep believing that her father and I only had sex twice and that we didn't enjoy, kept our eyes closed the entire time and never spoke of it again!" She laughed until her body was shaking, Katya had died beside her; gasping for breath as she had tears in her eyes, and Sydney had flopped backwards onto the bed again covering her eyes in horror even though her smile beneath it said otherwise.

"Now why do I find that hard to believe that coming from 'Miss out of control crazy sex in shower almost shattering the glass!" Katya finally gasped out between bouts of laughter, remembering Sydney's Thanksgiving declaration.

Irina swatted Katya in the arm even as her body shook with held in laughter and Sydney flushed bright red under her hand covering her eyes before she finally burst into the deep giggling laugh, remembering that moment.

"Yeah, that's what I thought, Sydney. Where do you think you get that from?" Katya laughed hysterically again as Irina kept swatting her to stop even though she was dying with laughter as well.

"Oh, I know where I get it from and for that I am thankful." Sydney kept talking and giggling from beneath the shelter of her hand covering her eyes. "I just don't want to think about it. More over, my dad on the other end. That's the part that bothers me!" Her smile covered her face as she heard Katya squeal with another hysterical fit of laughter and her mother's deep giggling. The entire bed was shaking from their efforts.

"So tell us, Sydney, did you break in that sexy little black number you bought that day in Beverly Hills last night?" Katya asked propping herself up on her elbow again as Irina shot her a death glare laced with humor, quite enjoying this conversation and only wishing Sophia was here with them; though she was probably having plenty of fun with that Eric.

Sydney covered her eyes again and couldn't stop the giggles or the fact that she was burning bright red.

"Ah ha! You did! Look at her blush, Irina! Your daughter is blushing!" Katya slapped Sydney's leg laughing, "Derevko women never blush about that! We are women hear us roar! Be proud, be loud! That's what I always say!"

"That's an American term. Where on Earth did you pick that up from?" Irina asked between laughs.

"I'm knowledgeable about all things sexual, Rina. All around the world!" Katya looked up at her with those seductive eyes waggling her eyebrows and sending both Irina and Sydney into bouts of laughter.

"So come on, Sydney. Details, details." Katya poked her with her finger, "You weren't shy about giving them away at Thanksgiving; I can't wait to hear how you celebrated Christmas." Her smiled was deviant and this time Irina covered her eyes as she laughed. "No?" She asked a few seconds later, in a high voice of sarcasm when Sydney remained silent lying on the bed. "Perhaps your mother can go first then, telling us of her adventures with Jack in that sexy little red thing she picked up. Come on Mrs. Claus, spill your guts. I can see it your eyes you've been a naughty girl this Holiday season." Katya poked Irina again.

"Oh God!" Sydney bolted straight up in bed, eyes wide and looking at her mother. "Mrs. Claus! Dad called you Mrs. Claus last night! _Arrrgh!_" She screamed with realization, slapping her hand back over her eyes and falling back over in bed as Katya and Irina died with laughter. "I'm never going to look at Santa or the innocence of Christmas again!" Sydney added, making them laugh harder as she giggled beneath her hand. As momentarily horrifying as it was to hear these things, it was just that, momentarily horrifying and then funny. As long as she didn't know all the details. "Wait a minute!" She bolted upright again, "It hasn't been six weeks yet?"

"That's why I said she's been a naughty girl this Holiday season." Katya laughed again with her devilish eyes and Irina blushed, something neither, her sister or daughter ever thought they'd see, and Sydney flopped back onto the bed. "I knew you weren't going to make it the whole six weeks, not with your crafty little minds." She kept laughing and had to hold her sides they began to hurt. "I want the details to that story as well."

"You two went for twenty-one years and now you can't even wait six weeks?!" Sydney gasped beneath her hidden space of darkness, covering her eyes.

"Precisely the point, My Sweet Child." Irina finally smiled, leaning over to kiss Sydney's cheek as she covered her eyes, with a smile.

"Ok, I guess. I can understand that." Syd finally spoke after a minute of thinking, her eyes still covered but with a big smile, "Because if I'm gone on a mission and without Vaughn for awhile, I practically attack him when I walk in the door." She broke into an enormous grin, rolling quickly to her side and uncovering her own, dark little deviant eyes and sending Irina's eyebrows straight up before she smiled and giggled with Sydney, and Katya felt like she was finally cracking Sydney's shell.

"See! I knew you weren't the little missionary-prude you claimed to be, not with 'your' mother." Katya poked Sydney and laughed hysterically at her sister and niece. "Otherwise known as, the _Kinky-Sex-Goddess_! _The KSG of the KGB_! _Rwarrr_!" She growled like a tiger, and pawed at Irina who was looking absolutely horrified behind her grin as she pinched the bridge of her nose, reminding herself to 'beat Katya over the head with a big stick' later.

"See. This is why little sisters can be so annoying." Irina spoke with her eyes closed, still pinching the skin between her eyes.

"The KSG of the KGB?" Sydney looked at her mother like her eyes were going to pop out of her head. Wanting to scream, _'Well, what the hell does that mean?_' _Did that mean her mother slept around and made a name for herself or what?_

Irina knew what Sydney was thinking and better run damage control so she sighed and braved her daughter with a smile.

"It was something they started calling me, the officers at the KGB, while I was living in the US…they believed that in order for me to have stayed with your father as long as I did, keep him from straying. I had to keep him 'very' entertained. They're men and their minds wander, usually to their penis and 'that's how I got the name." She shrugged with a smile.

"True." Katya nodded smiling at Sydney, "But its also very accurate even if it was thought up by horny males with too many wandering thoughts. The Kinky-Sex-Goddess part, not the part she 'had to be that way' to keep your father from straying or entertained enough to stay with her that long if, she was 'only' on assignment. Which she wasn't obviously as she fell in love with the man and he her and 'that's' why they were able to stay together and so happy for so long. _Whew!_" Katya smiled blowing out air after her rapid explanation and collapsed back into the pillows.

"Yes. Because I was in love with you father." Irina smiled warmly at Sydney.

* * *

"Hey, Sleepy Head." Jack dropped a soft kiss to Irina's temple as she lay on their bed, her hands folded beneath her cheek. His palm caressing her smooth dark waves as she woke with a smile, "You must have been pretty tired after all this excitement. You've been asleep for the last five hours."

"Five hours!" Irina groaned as she rolled over, covering her eyes with her forearm. "I slept the day away."

"You needed to." He smiled at how cute Irina Derevko could be when she was waking up, something he doubted few would ever believe. "Alexsei said that just because you're feeling better doesn't mean your body doesn't still need to rest."

"I know. I know. You're sounding like a broken record or in today's era, a scratched CD." She smiled even though her eyes were still covered and Jack leaned over capturing her lips with his. Jack's mouth tasted of chocolate and mint and Irina brought her arm around to run through the back of his hair.

"You taste pretty good." She smiled seductively, going in for another kiss, Laughing when she felt Jack's own laugh vibrating against her lips. "What have you been eating?" She looked into his smiling eyes as his face remained, hovering centimeters above hers. "Those mint Hershey kisses in the bowl in the bathroom?"

"Guilty." He smiled and laughed, sitting up and pulling her with him. "I think I may have found an new addiction."

Irina shot him a mock glare as her dark eyes locked onto his, "Hmmm, I don't know how I feel about being replaced by chocolate kisses…maybe there is a way, we can combine the two…" She whispered huskily into his ear, her warm breath tickling Jack's face.

"I think that's why you're a genius." He answered with his own shaky breath at what she was doing to him.

She crawled onto his lap as he sat on the edge of the bed, straddling him with her knees on either side of his hips, getting as close as possible. Her heated gaze never leaving his eyes as she lowered herself onto his legs with her arms around his neck.

"Now what are you getting me into 'Trouble?" He ran his strong hands up her back pulling her closer to his chest.

"Trouble?" Irina cocked her eyebrow at him with her famous smile.

"Yes, its your middle name." Jack answered flatly, trying not to smile.

"Hmm. Interesting." Irina was enjoying this moment, feeling better and having missed him over the last few days.

"Yes. It is…just like everything else about you." He turned his head slightly and leaned in brushing the hair off her neck, placing a hot kiss just in the indention between her neck and collarbone.

"Mmm. You taste pretty good yourself." He whispered huskily against her skin as his kisses found their way making a slow path up her neck; Irina tilting her head to give him better access.

"How much time do we have?" Irina moaned softly when he drew his hot tongue lazily across her throbbing pulse.

They were all going out to dinner and had reservations at one of Katya and Irina's favorite restaurants.

"Forty-three minutes." He hissed into her ear feeling himself growing hard with anticipation. "But I still have to shower."

"We can save time." She gasped, closing her eyes as how wonderful his hot mouth felt on her aching flesh. "By showering together."

Jack new that was no way of saving time, especially with the two of them but he didn't care.

"Sounds good." He breathed heavily against her neck as she lulled her head to the other side, giving him access so it had equal attention. His hands slid down the soft sweater she was wearing to cover her ass and then slid them under, lifting her off his legs and against him as he stood. Irina wrapped her legs around his waste as he carried her to the bathroom, his mouth continuing its assault on her flesh.

"Where's the baby?" She asked running her hands through his hair, dragging her fingernails against his scalp as he licked and nipped across her throat.

"Downstairs with everyone else." He set her down on the edge of the bathroom counter and his hands found a way under the sides of her sweater, her skin hot to the touch. "She's happy, fed and sleeping." His mouth moved along the underside of her jaw towards her lips. "Taken care of and in capable hands." He smiled before covering her luscious lips with his own.

His tongue sweeping across the inside of the sweltering cavern, flicking the tip of her tongue with his own, sucking and plunging as his hands worked their way up the smooth skin on her back.

Irina's hands grabbed at the base of his shirt pulling them up and out of his pants. She knew this was going to have to be somewhat quick in the time they had and her desperation for Jack was growing in their needing kiss.

_***Fever***_

"Too many clothes." Jack pulled her sweater over her head and then his own, crashing their scorching torsos together in a frenzy as his hot mouth seized hers once more, his hands tangling in her wild mane as Irina worked to undo the button of his pants.

The feel of her knuckles against his abdomen making Jack suck in a breath as his cock surged with the touch. Slowly Irina lowered the zipper and looped her fingers into the pockets, pushing his jeans over his hips and down to his knees.  
His dick already standing at attention inside the confines of his cotton boxers, and her fingers lightly grazed him through the material from the base up the length of his shaft and smiled when she heard a soft moan.

Her fingers slipping inside the elastic band trailing her fingers over the smooth skin and felt Jack's muscles clench beneath his skin. Jack's hands slid around her firm stomach to her lower back and then up, tracing the length of her spine until he reached the clasp of her bra and with a quick flick, unsnapped the confining material. Dragging the tips of his fingers around her rib cage to caress the undersides of her breasts.

Irina forced Jack's boxers down and freed his throbbing cock. Her hot fingers greedy to touch his length she grabbed his shaft with one hand and his ass with the other, pulling on both slowly in her direction. Her grip on his dick maddening and Jack jerked toward her eagerly as his thumbs traced slow circles around her nipples, flicking the hard peaks as her bra fell down the length of her arms. Irina maintained her grip around the width of his cock as she placed a hot open mouth kiss directly between Jack's pecks, swirling her tongue in circles over the heated flesh as her thumb caressed the head of his penis the same way.

Jack groaned against her touch and grabbed the strap of the bra and tugged, forcing Irina to let go momentarily to free herself from it. Her strong hands grabbed his hips and pushed him back slightly, her intent clear. Jack held her steady on top of the counter as she was bent over by keeping his hands on her shoulders. He moaned loudly feeling the first contact of her scorching tongue against the head of his cock as she teased it, swirling and then slid his length deeper into her mouth, closing her lips around him and sucking with just enough pressure to make Jack jerk into her slightly, fighting the urge to thrust into Irina's mouth.

"_Ohhhhhhh…._" He moaned again, her tongue ecstasy for his body. His ass clenched as she took him deeper into her throat and then pulled slowly away while increasing pressure. One of her hands had moved to cup his balls and teased the base of his cock with pressure from her thumb as her mouth and tongue continued to assault his manhood. He threw his head back, gasping for breath and gripped her skin fighting everything in him not to move his hips and thrust with her perfect timing. He turned his head and his gaze landed on the image of them in the massive mirror behind Irina. The sight of her strong muscular back with perfect curves, her long hair falling off of one shoulder and bent over in front of Jack as she sucked and nipped his cock turned him to granite. "Oh…my…God…Irina!" He moaned in pleasure and he didn't know how much longer he was going to be able to hold out against her forces and he didn't want to come just yet. He pushed back on her shoulders bringing her head up off of his and the cool air hitting his cock instantly sent shivers up his spine as it left the hot depths of her mouth. His hands slid down the front of her body finding the waistband of her pants and undoing them quickly.  
"You still have too many clothes on." He smiled, capturing her lips and plunging his tongue into her warmth.  
His hands gripped the edges of her pants and underwear and he pulled them down and under Irina's ass in one quick jerk, shimming them over her thighs and knees and with a little kick from Irina, they dropped to the floor. "Better." He stepped back to look at her with a smile, taking in her incredibly beautiful form. Jack reached his hand out to her and Irina slid off the counter, pressing herself into him as his arms encircled her body.

Irina's nipples pressing and scraping against his chest as she sucked his tongue into surrender, her hands grasping his ass and squeezing forcefully. Her mouth trailed its sizzling tongue over his chin and along his strong jaw-line and Jack's breath hitched when her tongue lapped at the sensitive spot at the base of his throat. His eyes watching them in the mirror, her beautiful hair falling over her strong back, her beautiful firm ass…everything about her was perfect.

"You're perfect." He breathed into her hair, nuzzling her soft cascades and taking in the scent of her shampoo. He wanted her to be able to see them as well, having not made love in front of a mirror in decades, the thought now, sent an erotic surge through him as he turned her in his arms; taking her hands in his and pressing them against the edge of the counter. Irina knew what he wanted and her heavy eyes met his in the reflection with a smile, highly turned on with the thought herself, she pressed her ass into his groin.

His hands reached under her to cup her breasts, dragging his hands over her abs and into the crux between her thighs. She spread her feet apart further and gasped when his fingers stroked into her drenched folds, flicking her engorged clit with measured speed. She pushed back from the counter further into him.

"Jack…inside me…_please_." Her searing gaze finding his eyes in the mirror and Jack bent over, kissing her shoulder.  
He grabbed his cock and forced it down to run between her legs and Irina tilted her hips down giving him better access to her core. Holding herself up with one hand, she reached between her legs guiding the tip of his penis between her slippery folds, aligning him with her entrance. Her eyes met Jack's in the mirror as he placed his hands on her hips again. With a soft nod, Jack thrust deep inside Irina's core, her tight walls constricting around his member and Irina's mouth dropped open, gasping for breath.

Jack's senses were overloaded by hearing, seeing and feeling Irina's reactions as he slowly pulled out and drove hard into her again, gripping her hips almost painfully with each move. Irina felt a small tremble going through her body as she watched their forms in the mirror, with Jack behind her as she bent over, pounding into her.

His pace became frenzied and Irina panted trying to catch her breath as her muscles clenched and released him with the same speed. Her knuckles turning white as she gripped the edge of the counter. She felt her orgasm building inside her as the swirling sensation surrounding her core began vibrating and humming through her entire body to her toes. She bit her lip and let her head hang down, her hair flopping over the front of her as she mewed and moaned.

Jack suddenly began slowing his pace pulling her back from the brink and Irina groaned loudly.

Steadying himself against her as he continued driving into her, he reached under their bodies and pinched her nipple, rolling it between his fingers and he could feel and hear Irina's hot gasps from the duel assault as her head hung between her arms.

She let go of the counter with one hand again and reached between her own legs to stroke herself and Jack's lust surged watching them in the mirror. He wanted to be inside this woman as far and as deep as humanly possible.

The more Irina bent over the further inside her he could reach. The hand assaulting her nipple came around to her back and Jack pressed lightly down between her shoulder blades.

"I…want to be deeper…inside." He groaned out and she complied. The friction of his cock against her core sending electricity through both of them at the new angle, both moaning loudly.

Irina's arms began to tremble as Jack pounded into her with increased speed again, the blood rushing to her head and her long hair kissing the floor as it flopped over her head.

"_Ahhh_…" Irina inhaled sharply as the first trembling inside her began signaling she was on the edge and about to go over. His depth so deep it was border-line painful and felt like ecstasy inside. Jack felt the vibrations of her muscles against his cock and wanted to see her face in the mirror as she came with him behind her.

"_Irina…_" He moaned, getting her attention and she raised her torso up and finally her head, flipping her hair back and whipping Jack with it. The flex and tone of her arms burned as she held herself upright, watching Jack's face and her own as she tap danced on the edge of the cliff. Jack's ass and thighs burned with his frenzied pace, moving faster inside her then he'd ever thought before.

"_Ahhh…ahhh… ahhh…_" Irina began to chant in a high pitch in time with her breathing as she spun inside.  
The sight and sound of her sent Jack flying over the edge with a strangled cry before he knew what was happening and his body rocked against her, a lightening bolt shooting straight through him from the tips of his toes and out his head.

Determined to see her own explosion, he kept driving as hard as he could into Irina, riding out his high and knowing she was close. Irina felt Jack explode within her depths, her muscles pulsating against his and her face contorted and she screamed loudly as the nirvana ripped through her body and every muscle in her body screamed in pain and pleasure.

Jack had thought she never looked more beautiful and continued his exhausting pace, until her last waves had passed, mesmerized by watching her response in the mirror.

Seeing she was about to collapse from their efforts he wrapped one arm beneath her torso and pulled her up against his chest, both of them stumbling back into the wall, using it for support as their breathing slowed and returned to normal.

Jack keeping his arm across her chest, still inside her warm center as his cock continued to melt against her quiver, he rested his cheek against Irina's head; their eyes locked onto one another in the mirror.

"Wow." Irina summed up what they were both thinking and Jack laughed, kissing her hair and sending vibrations through her body. Her brilliant smile lit her sated face as she brought her hands up to grip his forearm across her chest. "We never made it into the shower." She spoke softly in her deep husky voice, clips of her accent accentuating the words before she started laughing with him.

"Next time." Jack's chest continued to rise and fall heavily as her weight rested fully against him.  
"I think I like this bathroom may be my new favorite room in the palace." He smiled laughing while they continued to talk to the mirror and their reflections.

"But there are so many other rooms to try…" She turned her head and kissed his bicep resting near her face,  
"I think it's only fair if we try out every room, then make that decision." She waggled her eyebrows and he pulled her tighter to him.

"Good plan. Must take every room into account for proper consideration." He spoke in his serious business tone and Irina laughed again. "Ooh, I like that." He cooed surprisingly when her vibrating laugh reached his member still inside her.

"Like what?" Irina arched her eyebrow with her seductive grin firmly in place, bedroom eyes calling to him again.

"The vibrations you create when you laugh feel…good." He reached snaked his other hand up her body with a deviant grin as she watched him in the mirror. He held her forcefully against him, pinning her body to his before he started tickling her and making her squeal with laughter. "Oh…yeah…I love that." He felt himself growing hard inside her again.

"Jack!" She screamed against his assault as her whole body shook with laughter. He was the only man besides Mikhail, who knew how insanely ticklish she was. "Stop!" She shouted in both Russian and English, in between her giggles. "Please?"

"Irina Derevko begging me to stop tickling her? If the world only knew." He smiled, pressing his forehead against her temple as she continued to laugh at his tickling. Her laughter vibrating through his cock and out to his entire body.

Irina felt him getting hard inside her again with her giggles and she continued to beg for mercy.

"Jack! Jack! Jack!" She chanted out quickly, "You have to stop! I need to eat something sugary before we start again! Please!"

"Ok! Ok, I'll stop for now with that one consideration." He stopped tickling her and wrapped his other arm around her abdomen, pulling her to him again. He kissed her hair and smiled at them in the mirror. "I can't believe I was with you for eleven years and never tickled you while I was inside you. Damn that feels good." He wiggled his hips rubbing himself against her ass.

"No, you were always tickling me before and after but never during." She smiled, giggling some more.

"Ooh." Jack shivered against her feeling the vibrations from her again. "Yes, what the hell was I thinking back then?"

"I need a kiss." Irina smiled at his reflection and Jack turned her face back to his, capturing her lips in a sweet kiss. "Mmm. As much as I enjoyed that; that was not the kiss I meant." She grinned madly at him and then turned to look at the crystal bowl of Hershey's kisses on the counter next to the box of Kleenex. "I need some sugar, so you'll have to let me go."

Jack groaned and stuck out his bottom lip like he was pouting.

"Jack Bristow is pouting! Quick! Where's the camera!" She laughed before kissing the lip that was hanging so low.

"I don't want to let you go, I rather like where I am inside you." He raised his eyebrows with a smile. Her warmth and tightness enveloping him like a security blanket.

"I am rather found of your residence inside me as well, but if I don't eat something with sugar in it soon, we'll have a repeat of the 'blight." She raised her own eyebrows using her teacher tone that Jack loved. "I promise you can 'come home again,' as soon as I've had some chocolate." She whispered in her sexy voice.

"Alright." He sighed, kissed her again and released his hold.

Irina slipped off and away from him, leaving him standing there with the same pouting look and a full hard on.

"Jack don't pout, it doesn't become you." She smiled looking at his reflection in the mirror, trying not to laugh, as he stood there, aroused with a pouting lip when she walked away. She unwrapped her chocolate reviver and ate it slowly and with languid licks, teasing him as he watched her. "Shit!" She swore suddenly, turning to face the clock.  
"We only have fifteen minutes!" She flung open the glass shower door and turned on the steamy water. "We don't have time." She turned back to him apologetically and laughed seeing his wide eyes and rock hard cock.

"Well something has to be done about this!" He grabbed himself with one fist. "I can't exactly go downstairs like this! So either I have to stand here and whack-off watching you while you're in the shower or you can help me out with a mutual beneficial quickie." He stroked himself slowly with short movements as Irina's eyes danced with her smile roaming his body.

"I suppose I can help you with that problem. Don't want a good hard-on to go to waste." She smiled seductively and stepped into the spray; the water glistening off her body from the light as she allowed it to soak her body and hair. Irina reached her hand out to him and he clasped her fingers gently stepping towards her into the big shower. Their mouths met in a crash of hot dueling tongues. She lifted one leg and wrapped it around behind his ass and used her strength to pull him closer until his cock was firmly resting against her hot, wet core. The contact making them moan against one another's mouths.

Jack slid his hands down her sides pressing into her skin as he went and dug them into her ass, lifting her up and backing them into the wall of the shower.

He reached between teasing the head of his cock against her dripping entrance before pushing achingly slow into her tight center, stealing Irina's breath.

"Jack…_ahhh!_" She squealed with pleasure, "We are…in a hurry."

When he was fully inside her, he stopped completely.

"Jack!" She swatted him on the shoulder trying to speed him up.

"Oh, but this feels so good." He rested his forehead against the cool tile beside her head as the hot water poured over them.

Seeing a need for immediate action as Jack was in capable, she pushed hard against his chest, unwrapping her legs from around him until her toes touched the shower floor.

"On the floor. On your back. Now!" She commanded with her stern eyes and cocked eyebrow and Jack immediately fell into step, incredibly turned on by her commands.

He sat down on the cold tiles as the hot water swirled around them and Irina pushed his chest until he was lying down completely on the floor of the shower. As soon as he was all the way down, she stepped over him and lowered herself over his groin until she was sitting on her knees directly over his engorged cock.

_***Lady***_

"Hands!" Irina commanded and Jack bent his arms at the elbows, lacing his fingers with hers as he helped support her when she leaned forward in their slippery environment, mesmerized by how forceful she was being in her take-charge command. As if performing a swift military combat procedure in this mission, she rocked her hips, tilted them at just the right angle and impounded herself on his dick, taking his full length inside her immediately causing them both to shudder and groan. She rocked her hips and shifted again so they were creating the perfect friction and pressed against his hands, lifting off of him slightly and then driving him into her again as she found her rhythm. Fast and furious she rode him and Jack was moaning and gasping for breath at the hot friction between her tight pussy and his engorged cock.

The sight of Irina drenched in water, her wet hair slicked down her back and over her shoulder, the water spraying her from behind and mist surrounding her made Jack mad with desire. Her breasts heaved and bounced along with her every thrust, their knuckles white with the tense grip as her black eyes bore into his.

"Goddamn, you're beautiful!" He gasped, feeling like he was going to hyperventilate, unable to catch his breath with her expeditious pace.

Irina's thighs burned with rage as she drove them both to the brink, pressing Jack's hands back further and further towards the floor in her maddening velocity.

"Oh, God Irina! You're going to kill me!" Jack he cried out, thinking for sure she'd ride him to his death and kill him with rapture. "_Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!_" He chanted in his cries.

Irina dug her fingernails into the backs of his hands as she tensed and screamed with pleasure when her orgasm hit, the sound echoing off the walls, throwing her head back, whipping water with it. Her eyes screwed shut watching the stars while her body convulsed, continuing to ride out her surge of paradise until she felt Jack tense beneath her, thrust painfully deep into her with a strangled cry of elation when his groin exploded so intensely he was certain he'd blown a nut with the pure power behind it. His muscles burned from head to toe as Irina continued her maddening pace against him until the last waves of his orgasm were gone and he was sure he was going to die.

Irina finally collapsed against him, her wet hair stuck to his chest as she struggled with her erratic thighs, ass and abs were on fire from her efforts to bring them both to climax as quickly as possible, succeeding at record breaking pace. Remembering the reason 'why' they were so frenzied she placed her palms against Jack's pecks and lifted herself off of him and forced her legs to stand. She had to place her hand against the shower wall for support until she was certain her legs wouldn't give out under her. When she was sure, she backed under the spray again, grabbing a bottle of shampoo and went to work lathering up her hair on another mission…

"I think I'm going to die." Jack couldn't move as he watched her standing over his naked form on the bottom of the shower while she washed her hair. His chest rising and falling rapidly in a dazed state of ecstasy he was certain would kill him. "I can't move." He moaned as he tried to move and realized he'd strained every muscle in his body when his orgasm ripped through him, so he just lay there content to look up at her naked form hovering above him, lathered up with soapy suds. "God, I love you. You're going to kill me, but God, I love you!" He gasped flopping one hand onto his chest, the only movement he could manage.

Irina smiled to herself under the spray of the hot water; happy she had such an effect on him.

"I love you too, Honey, but we were supposed to be downstairs by now. Get up!" She offered him her hand with a smile.

"I can't move." He tried to grab her hand and failed, exhausted, "Tell them we were on a mission and I died."

"Jack…" She whined at him holding in her giggle with arm extended, waiting.

"What? Its not lying to them. You were on a mission to rid me of my boner as fast as possible and you inadvertently killed me in the process."

"Jack…" Irina said again, this time a laugh breaking out and shaking her body.

"Not that I'm complaining because. Wow, My Love, that was mind blowing. I think, I might have blown a nut." He moved his hand down to cover his crotch and felt his balls to make sure they were still in tack as Irina laughed her deep laugh above him, unable to keep it in with his humorous state.

"Ok, come on, seriously. Get up!" She leaned over slightly and grabbed his hand pulling hard and Jack contorted his face and whined the whole way up in pain. She turned him around so that his back was against the scalding spray and flipped the showerhead to massage. "That should help those tense muscles." She leaned in and kissed him soundly, rubbing her slick wet body against him. She grabbed her mesh sponge and lathered him up with soap, washing him like he had done for her when she was sick; all the while wearing a smile at how cute he looked in sex agony.

"Thank you." He smiled softy at her as she stood in front of him lathering up his head in shampoo.

"You help me I help you." She smiled brightly and kissed him again quickly. Having washed his entire body at the same break neck pace.

"Oh yeah, you helped me alright." He snickered when she pushed him under the spray again.

When he was rinsed she turned off the water and pushed him out the door. Grabbing a big fluffy red towel for herself and one for Jack. She threw it back at him and hit him in the face with her coy smile before wrapping her own around her body without drying at all. Irina hardly waited for Jack to have the towel wrapped around him before throwing open the door and charging into their bedroom.

Standing frozen next to Lena's bassinet were a slack-jawed Weiss and bemused Sophia holding the baby to her chest.

They'd come up to get Lena's pacifier and stopped frozen when they heard the first scream of, '_Oh God Irina…You're going to kill me!'_ coming from the bathroom. They both looked at each other and their heads snapped back to the door hearing Jack's chants of '_Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!'_ then Irina's Earth shattering scream and his strangled cry of ecstasy while the shower was running. Neither, Sophia or Weiss were able to move when they realized just what was taking Jack and Irina so long to get ready. By the sounds of their screams, some wild, extremely tense and out of control action was going on in there.

_'Apparently, Irina Derevko was lethal in many ways…'_ Weiss tried to swallow but couldn't tear his eyes off her.

Irina was surprised to see them standing there, and gauged from their reactions and the looks on their faces they'd 'heard' exactly what was going on in that steamy bathroom.

Seeing Weiss' eyes bugging out of his head staring at her drenched body in nothing but a towel, and Sophia biting her lip trying not to smile Irina turned the tables on them and flashed a brilliant smile.

Brought her finger to her lips and whispered, "Shhh," softly; then winked and waved her hand ushering them out the door before Jack saw them when he came out of the bathroom.

When Weiss stood unable to move, mouth still open, Irina closed the distance fast and grabbed his arm, clutching her towel with the other and pulled him out of his state of shock and pushed him out the door where Sophia was already in the hall giggling.

Jack emerged from the bathroom just as Irina was closing the door.

"Oh God, we left the door open?!" His eyebrows shot up, realizing he hadn't closed it behind him when he went to wake Irina.

"It's fine, Jack. Everyone is downstairs." Irina replied smoothly, with her oozing charm and smile as she walked towards her closet and dropped the towel. "We've already missed our reservation time."

"Somehow I think that with your status it shouldn't be too difficult to get a table." Jack looked at her mockingly with a crooked grin. "My beautiful Empress."


	37. Chapter 37

_**AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat): Air Force One- Main Theme (original) by from the Air Force One Soundtrack, In The Mood by Glenn Miller, Auld Lang Syne by Guy Lombardo, This Years Love by David Gray, So Happy Together by The Turtles**_

* * *

THIRTY-SEVEN

o

"Are my mom and dad ready yet?" Sydney asked with a smile as she slipped into her coat, seeing Weiss and Sophia coming down the stairs.

Everyone was waiting in the foyer for Jack and Irina. She'd directed the question to Weiss but he just stood there in front of her with a blank expression on his face.

Sydney scrunched her eyebrows up analyzing him before Sophia jumped in.

"Yes, they are. They said to give them fifteen or twenty minutes. Your mom is still drying her hair."

"They've been up there over an hour. What have they been doing?" Sydney looked up towards the second story where the closed door to her parents' bedroom was.

Weiss finally snapped out of his shock and smiled brightly with a mischievous grin.

"They were-" He was about to say something he shouldn't and Sophia cut him off.

"_Talking_. They were talking." She shot Weiss a glare when Sydney's head was turned but Katya caught it. They were covering something up. She'd get it out of Sophia later.

Irina and Jack made their way downstairs fifteen minutes later and looking impeccable.

"Jack, what happened to your hands there? Looks like you were attacked by wild animal. A 'Siberian' Tiger maybe?" Weiss smiled smugly watching Jack help Irina into her coat.

Jack burned bright red, looking down at the backs of his hands where ten perfect fingernail marks indented his flesh, already bruising in their swollen crimson state.

"_Owe!_" Weiss yelped when Sophia stomped on his foot giving him a death glare. Sydney and everyone else's eyes going to Jack's hands and Katya started giggling when Irina gave Weiss a death glare of her own, realizing now what her daughter and Mr. Weiss were supposed to be keeping secret.

"So, Rina, I guess that means you're feeling better?" Katya asked in her chipper voice, "_Rwarrr_!" She growled, pawing the air and laughed deeply when Irina rolled her eyes and kissed Jack on the cheek, seeing he was obviously mortified.

"Oh God!" Sydney muttered under her breath as she tilted her head down, covering her eyes realizing what her parents were really doing to have taken so long upstairs. "Can we just go to the restaurant please?" She stalked past everyone and out the door to the waiting limo.

"Let's go." Irina pulled on Jack's hand with a smile.

* * *

Irina rested her chin on her fist, looking at the swirling clouds outside the plane's window, lost in thought over the events of the last two days, Lena was sleeping soundly against her chest, covered with a soft pink blanket.

Vladimir, Irina, and Katya held a press conference in Moscow answering questions about Anastasia and their own lives, the future of Russia and Irina's time in the US. They were also giving the facts of Irina's last minute Pardon by President Bush, who had flown to Russia to show his support and explain his part in it all. Mikhail and Vaughn had left for France a few days earlier to give Vaughn's mother the surprise of her life and now that the press conference was over, Sydney had flown to Paris to join them for the New Year. Marshall and Weiss had left for Los Angeles and were now back at work.

"You did fantastic." Jack gave Irina a small smile, picking up her hand and kissing the back of it, seeing she was lost in thought. The press had asked some rather difficult questions and although Irina handled it beautifully at the time, he knew she was thinking about them now. "Are you ok?" He continued to stroke the back of her hand, sitting beside her.

Irina sighed with a big smile, adoring the man beside her and his concern.

"Yes. I'm fine. Thank you for asking." She cupped his face lightly bringing his lips to hers with a smile. "I've come along way from Death Row to riding on Air Force One with the President of the United States." She laughed softly, brushing her nose with his, eliciting a small laugh from him as well when he looked across the aisle to see President Bush talking with one of his administrators on the phone. They had been invited as guests of the President and First Lady to join them for the New Year's Eve celebration in Washington, D.C. with other foreign dignitaries.

"Well, you are rather remarkable." He smiled kissing her lightly again. "We haven't been in D.C together in a long time." Jack added quietly, studying her eyes remembering the place where it had all began for them.

"No, we haven't." Irina brushed her fingers through his short hair above his ear. "I'm looking forward to it." She smiled, lacing their fingers, "Is our restaurant still there?" Her mind flashed back to the little Chinese place where she and Jack had there first date.

"No, sadly." He sighed leaning back in the plush leather chair. "It burned down in 1994 from an electrical fire during a snowstorm. They never rebuilt." Seeing her curious look at how he knew this detail he added, "I was in D.C. on business in the summer of 1996, on what would have been our 25th wedding anniversary. I just found myself driving by there one night." He shrugged remembering how painful it was to still be in love with the ghost of the woman you also hated.

"I always celebrated our anniversary by getting really, _really_ drunk." Irina smiled softly shaking her head and looking back out the window at the blinking lights on the wings of the enormous aircraft. "I always wondered what you were doing at that same time on the other side of the world." She turned her gaze back to Jack's.

"The same. Sitting alone, in the dark in our house getting really, _really_ drunk." He finally cracked a smile. "I guess in a way, we were still celebrating together by washing away are woes with copious amounts of alcohol. With the exception of last year, in Panama." He waggled his eyebrows remembering how they celebrated 'that' anniversary.

"Hi." A young woman in a dark suit with her hair pulled back in a severe knot and glasses smiled at them. Her badge stated her name was, Karen, and she was on the Presidents staff. "I just wanted to let you know that we'll be landing in a few minutes, so you might want to buckle up and put the baby in her safety seat now." She smiled brightly, reaching out tentatively to brush Lena's ear with the back of one finger. "She's so precious. Congratulations."

"Thank you." Jack and Irina replied in unison and made Karen smile brighter, before she went in search of her own seat.

Irina had just finished snapping the last strap of Lena's seat into place when she felt the drop in pressure as they descended. She put out her hand and without asking Jack handed her Lena's pacifier to give to their baby for her little ears.

"Well here goes nothing." He smiled squeezing Irina's hand gently as they felt the wheels touch down on the tarmac. "Are you ready?"

President Bush smiled at them warmly, a guiding hand showing them toward the front of the plane. "It's going to be a circus out there. They're all very excited you're here."

_***Air Force One***_

"Here we go." He smiled as he stood on the top of the steps and waved to the crowd gathered below. Bulbs were flashing at in incessant pace as he made his way down the steps. A thunderous around of applause went up when Irina and Jack carrying Lena, stepped out and smiled, waving to the excited people below.

"This is just surreal." Jack whispered to her through clenched teeth as he smiled softly to the adoring public and Press. They all made it to the awaiting limos in the motorcade and drove off into the cool D.C night towards the White House.

President Bush sat across from them in the dark car, smiling. "Laura is ecstatic you've decided to join us and she can't wait to see the baby again." He laughed softly.

"It was a very kind offer, we couldn't refuse." Irina smiled her enchanting grin, captivating the President.

"Well, I am certain that the two…three, " He added smiling down at Lena, "Of you will be the most captivating people in attendance tonight. It's our honor to have you." Bush drummed his fingers across the back of the seat, smiling.

Lena would be going with them to the ball as Irina wasn't about to let just anyone care for her baby when Sloane was and Cuvee were still out there, she wanted her within sight at all times. The President fully understood after hearing about Sloane's plans.

* * *

_Knock. Knock. Knock. _Jack knocked softy on the bathroom door in his tux.

"Are you ready?" He called softly, pulling at the bow tie on his neck. He was about to walk in when he felt the handle turning beneath his palm and stepped back. His breath caught in his throat when Irina emerged with her seductive smile looking absolutely stunning. Her dress was made of silver hues, an Empress cut that was form fitting around her mid-section, busting her already enormous cleavage. The back was cut into a 'v' and exposed her sexy back before it dropped into a wide, full skirt with a short train. Her hair had been pulled up in a loose French-twist by a diamond-covered comb with soft curls framing her face and falling around her diamond adored ears and graceful neck.

"Wow." Jack stood transfixed as she glided by him, then spun slowly in front of him.

"So you approve?" She smiled coyly, loving his reaction when she cocked her head to the side.

"You look amazing." He smiled softly, walking up to her slowly and grabbing her hips lightly with his hands when she wrapped her arms loosely around his shoulders. "Breathtaking is more like it." He captured her luscious red lips with his own. "Wow." He repeated looking her over once more as his eyes bugged out.

"You look pretty handsome yourself, Mr. Bristow." She pulled on the lapels of his tux jacket, with her famous grin. "Thank you." She added seriously, searching his brown eyes with her own.

"For what?" He asked softly as his hands caressed the smooth skin down her spin, standing close to her.

"For being here with me. For standing by me, with me." She sighed, "You've been wonderful about all of this."

He leaned in slowly, with his eyes never leaving hers, kissing her softly.

"I wouldn't be anywhere else but by your side." He smiled, brushing her cheek softy with his thumb. "Now lets go knock these peoples socks off."

"Oh my, Irina." Laura gasped when she saw them coming to meet her and George at the top of the stairs. "You look stunning." She smiled in awe as she greeted her with a kiss to the cheek. "You certainly look the role of royalty tonight." Laura smiled, squeezing Irina's free hand for support before turning her attention to Lena swaddled in white satin blankets, wearing a perfect, tiny little satin dress that matched. "Oh!" She cooed running her fingers over the sleeping babes hair, "She's getting so big, and yet is still so tiny! How much does she weigh now?"

"She's up to 7lbs." Irina smiled down adoringly at the little baby in her arms.

"So tiny! What a little peanut!" She smiled shaking her head. "I'll never forget when we heard her little noises and Sydney unzipped her jacket revealing this super tiny baby strapped to her chest. What a shock!"

"I can only imagine." Irina sighed softly, thinking about how her daughters had saved her life. "Thank you both, again for what you did." She looked up with glassy eyes.

"Don't thank us, Irina." Laura squeezed her hand feeling tears herself, remembering just a few weeks ago the sight of Irina on respirator in a coma with her baby on her chest trying to bring her back to life.

"Yes. Please, don't thank me. I don't deserve your thanks." President Bush placed his hand over his wife's holding Irina. "It was the right thing to do and I'll never forgive myself for allowing it to go as far as it did."

The corners of Irina's mouth twitched into a smile.

"Thank you anyway. Now let's enjoy this evening. I'm looking forward to dancing with my husband." Her eyes darted to Jack's with a big smile.

He took her arm in the crook of his elbow and the two couples walked gracefully down the steps and into the ballroom where everyone was already waiting.

_***In The Mood***_

The Big Band Orchestra was already playing and everyone stopped their chatter to look at the gorgeous woman they now knew was the ruler of Russia. Smiles and applause were given as they made their way to the head table.

They enjoyed a wonderful meal, sitting with the President and the First Lady along with the President and First Lady of France, the Chancellor of Germany and his wife, and the Prime Minister of Britain and his wife.

The conversation was polite and Irina was at her best enchanting everyone with her disarming beauty and poise. The fact that she was able to converse fluently with almost every Head of State from each country in their own language awing everyone with her intelligence.

Jack was smiling from ear to ear watching Irina so happy and comfortable with them and he felt himself having a good time in public for the first time in decades. When he and Irina danced, they felt hundreds of pairs of eyes falling upon them and soon the background faded away as they only had eyes for each other.

"They're so beautiful together." Laura cooed to those left at the table, cuddling Lena while they watched Irina and Jack and numerous other couples dance around the room. "So in love. They look like they are the only two people in this room."

"She's rather remarkable, isn't she?" The Chancellor smiled surprise with his eyebrows rising as he leaned over the table towards the Bush's. "All this time we never knew. Just amazing."

"Their whole story is just unbelievable!" The French President's wife smiled in awe. "And she looks every part the princess doesn't she? That dress is fantastic!"

"She is stunning." President Bush added softly, gazing at the couple moving around the dance floor laughing softly to themselves about something personal said between them. He turned his gaze back to his wife and found her hand, looking at her adoringly.

A few hours later the countdown began as they raised their champagne glasses up and counted together in various languages, smiling and laughing as they all stood in the middle of the ballroom waiting for the new year to arrive.

"_5, 4, 3, 2, 1! Happy New Year!_" Everyone shouted and the kissing commenced.

_***Auld Lang Syne***_

"Happy New Year, Irina." Jack smiled, whispering against Irina's faces as he moved in slowly for another kiss as the confetti and balloons dropped all around them.

"Happy New Year, Jack." She smiled against his lips, knowing thankful for another year and being in his arms again.

2002 had been insane for all of them.

It had begun with her still in CIA custody, she and Jack had conceived Lena in Panama; she escaped and was double-crossed by Sloane, Peter and Sark. She was shot by Sydney, Cuvee, Sloane and Jack. She'd been stabbed, she'd been _killed_, but she was also saved in more ways then one. She found her relationship with her sister and was found by her family and her country. She also gave birth to a beautiful little girl in a CIA cell and found new friends amongst old enemies.

Jack had been thinking along the same lines as they danced together with their baby between them. 2003 would be the first year of the rest of their lives together.

When the evening finally drew to an end Jack and Irina said their goodbyes and goodnights and went to their room. Irina sat in a chair by the glass French doors feeding Lena her bottle and thankful that tomorrow she could go back to breastfeeding having finished her antibiotics yesterday.

Jack emerged from the bathroom with his tie now loosely draped over his neck and the top buttons on his white shirt undone. His breath caught again and heart surged with love when he looked at the two of them together basked in the glow of the moonlight.

Irina was still in her dress and the light bounced off the silver making her glow. Her smile radiant and she slowly rocked their baby to sleep in her arms. He leaned against the doorframe, watching until Irina's eyes looked up and caught his with a soft smile.

Carefully she stood, and laid the baby in her perfect little crib that had been bought by the Bush's just for her. Irina covered her with a soft blanket before dropping a kiss to Lena's soft head.

"Sleep well, my angel." She whispered in Russian, smiling softly as Jack came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her middle from behind, planting a kiss on her bare shoulder.

"This has been some year, hasn't it?" Jack whispered in her ear as they stood over their sleeping child.

Irina nodded and he lay his cheek against hers, swaying with her softly.

"Jack," She said softly after a minute, "Ask me again."

Jack was immediately stunned and wasn't sure if she'd meant what he thought. His heart began beating rapidly in his chest as he turned her slowly in his arms. Her dark depths looked up at him and he could see looking down at her chest, she was breathing just as quickly as he.

"Irina," He whispered softly, cupping her face gently, searching her eyes. He wasn't sure he deserved to ask the question again, wasn't sure he had shown her his trust in her, his love unconditionally.

Irina saw in his reaction, in his eyes and heard it in his voice his apprehension. She reached up with one hand and ran her thumb over his cheek, holding the other hand against her chest.

"Ask me again, Jack." Her dark eyes found and held his in the darkness, unafraid and more, sure then ever they were ready.

Jack had carried her ring everywhere with him in his pants pocket since the moment she had given it back. Reminding him what he wanted, what he was working for. His hand dropped from her face and found the metal band in his pocket, slowly he brought it up to their combined hands between them.

_***This Years Love***_

"Irina, you have my heart, you have my love and you have my complete trust in us." He took a deep breath staring into her pooling eyes as he spoke in the language of her heart, Russian. "Will you marry me?"

"Yes." She smiled softly, knowing this time their love would last.

The long waiting was over after all these years. They'd both been waiting on their own too long. No more lies between them, no more secrets. They'd both opened up their hearts again for this fall. Now, was their time and this time it was going to last.

She held up her finger and Jack slipped it on as her tears finally fell. She'd missed it; that little metal band and diamond on her hand and felt complete again as she found Jack's eyes and saw his were tearing as well. He cupped her head and brought his lips to hers.

It had started slow and the passion quickly built between them in the need to connect and express their love.

Jack's hands roamed up her sides and his hand met her warm exposed flesh of her back, pulling her closer to him as he moaned softly against her mouth.

Irina's hands slid up Jack's chest and over his shoulders, stripping off his tuxedo jacket never breaking contact with his lips, and letting it drop to the floor behind them. Her long slender fingers slowly began to unbutton his shirt one button at a time while Jack's tongue caressed her lips and tongue in a tender kiss that never ended, biting, and sucking.

Pausing only briefly to catch their breath as their noses continued the intimate contact. Her warm breath against his face as he stare into her beautiful eyes.

"I love you, Irina." He whispered, cupping her head with both hands as he pulled back slightly to gaze into the eyes of the only woman he'd ever loved with everything he had.

Irina leaned up and captured his lips, overwhelmed with love and he felt himself losing all control as her tongue danced against the roof of his mouth, flicking his tongue slowly and sweeping him off his feet with just a kiss. Her hands pressing against his warm flesh inside his shirt as he pulled her closer to him. She pulled the crisp white shirt his out of his pants as his hands began undoing the zipper in the back of her long dress, fingers brushing against her scorching flesh revealed beneath and making Irina gasp against his touch. The roughness of his finger-tips against her smooth skin sending little bolts of electricity straight up her spine and Irina felt herself tingling from her head to her toes. His kiss moved to her chin and then along the length of her jaw as she tilted her head back giving him better access and moaning softly when his tongue darted out to taste the soft flesh at the base of her throat. His hands on her hips bringing their' lower bodies as close as possible in his need to be near her.

Irina's hands freed him from his shirt and she lazily raked her fingernails over his pecks to circle the dark skin around his nipples, pinching and rolling them softly between her fingers and causing Jack to moan against her neck as his breathing picked up.

His strong hands moved up to her firm upper arms and pulled her slowly away from him, letting the gorgeous gown drop and pool around her legs. She hadn't been wearing a bra and now stood before him wearing only millions of dollars of diamonds and a black satin thong.

The moonlight reflecting off the diamonds danced around the room with her every breath. She was more beautiful every time he looked at her and Irina could see Jack's eyes pooling again with love, as he looked her standing before him.

Slowly she reached up and clasped the diamond clip in her hair, releasing her long wave tresses that cascaded down her back. She let the clip drop to the floor with her dress and held her hand palm up to Jack, inviting him into her space with a small smile.

He took her hand and she kissed his face softly just below his eyes, tasting the salty tear that had finally fell.

"You are so beautiful." His warm breath tickled her ear when he whispered in her ear, taking her into his arms as he backed them up towards the large bed. The backs of her knees hit the edge of the end of bed as their mouths dueled in hot open mouth kisses, appreciating each tender caress.

His strong hand on her naked back guided Irina down onto the mattress. He broke the kiss and paused briefly to look into her eyes before stepping back and undoing his belt, removing his pants with his eyes never leaving hers. Slowly he raised one knee to the bed and crawled over her, sliding one hand beneath her back he pulled her toward his chest and moved them both to the center of the bed until her head rested against the soft fluffy pillows.

He rolled off to the side of her and she turned to face him as their mouths met once again, his hand reaching up to caress the skin over her rib cage and down the curve of her body.

She placed her palm against his cheek, pulling his mouth into hers as she trailed her tongue along the length of his lower lip. She felt his strong hand on her thigh and lifted her leg with his guidance dropping it over his hip when he scooted closer to her until his hardness was pressed against her aching flesh. His hand remained caressing the skin over her thigh and rear while his other found and traced the soft curves of her breasts in the most gentle and intimate of caresses. The need to be inside her was overwhelming, wanting to be as connected as possible to the soul he'd been missing for two decades. His hand gently moved over the curve of her bottom and his longer fingers found her wetness, caressing lightly between her folds and Irina gasped against his mouth when he brushed against her most intimate spot.

Tears of happiness forming in her eyes when she looked into Jack's eyes he guided himself into her opening. Remaining just inside her entrance for a moment before slowly sliding into her warmth causing her to take a long exaggerated breath while he held her gaze. Her thigh pulling her as close to him as possible until he was deep inside where he stilled, content in the moment to just be a part of each other in this intimate contact. His hand ran up the length of her body from her behind, fingertips tracing the indention of her spine until he cupped her face gently, his thumb brushing away a tear that had escaped and was running over the bridge of her nose.

"I love you, Jack." She smiled and blinked causing another tear to fall against his fingers. "And I'm finally home."

The statement had never been more, true. For the first time in twenty-two years, all the components of her life seemed to be inline with her heart. Jack holding her in such a loving embrace, as their bodies lay connected in a perfect fit, their hearts pounding in sync with one another with their chests pressed together. Jack felt his own tears slip as he looked into her beautiful brown depths and felt his heart clench with the love for her surrounding his very soul. His thumb traced lightly over her cheek-bone as he moved his face towards hers and brought his lips to hers, his tongue tracing the her top lip softly before sweeping into her mouth. He moved his hand over her back and pressed her into him with a palm between her shoulder blades he moved slowly inside her. Pulling out as she clenched around him until only his tip remained before thrusting slowly back into everything he'd ever wanted. His hand moved to her hip, and hers to his as they locked eyes, breathing hitched and found their rhythm against, and with one another. The slow pace at which they moved was agonizing and torturous in the way that only, sweet pleasure could be, savoring every move, every caress, every whispered word of love, as they brought each other to their heights.

Bodies trembling as they both neared the edge and Jack moved his hand over her lower back pressing with his fingers lightly into her spine and sending her over the edge, her body shuddering against his as they lay side-by-side on the bed.

He had swallowed Irina's cry of passion with his kiss and felt new tears against his cheek as she cried in ecstasy and happiness, her body rocking against him. Jack felt himself coming right behind her and with one last controlled, torturously slow thrust exploded inside her. Irina had swallowed his cry, while wrapping her thigh tightly around his hip wanting him deeper inside her as he spasm, and shook in her arms continuing to moan into her mouth as her body seized him inside and out.

"Forever and always." She smiled and reached up, brushing the hair off his forehead with her fingers, as they lay connected in their embrace. Neither will to relinquish their hold on one another. Their breathing still ragged and bodies still quivering from their lovemaking they held each other.

"I love you so much, it physically hurts." He whispered softly, smiling as he brushed her own hair behind her ear. "I'm sorry I hurt you." He admitted, still feeling sadness and guilt at how he had hurt her with his words and actions.

Irina smiled softly in return, moving closer to him, staring into his beautiful brown eyes and seeing the real emotion, the remorse. "I know you are and I'm sorry I hurt you."

Their final apologies over past hurts, put to rest with love and a new beginning.

"I'm never letting you go again." Jack searched her eyes, "Forever and always, Irina...forever and always." He repeated her saying as he closed the distance between their mouths.

* * *

"Mom!" Sydney yelled with a big smile two days rushing through the front door of Jack and Irina's house in LA. "Mom!" She yelled again with excitement as she raced upstairs, searching every room looking for Irina.

"Sydney!" Irina called back having heard her daughter screaming for her outside in the backyard, wondering what the hell was wrong.

Sydney came flying to the top of the stairs, looking over the balcony down at Irina as she shut the French doors behind her.

"Sydney, what is it?" Irina shifted Lena in her arms and looked up curiously at her daughter happy to see her smiling and relieving the panic she'd felt hearing her screaming.

"We're both getting married!" Sydney squealed again with a big smile on her face laughing as she ran down the stairs and engulfed Irina in her arms. "Dad just told me at the office that you said 'yes' again." She rocked her mother back in forth in her arms with such excitement that Irina had to laugh.

"Yes. We are." Irina continued to giggle as she guided Sydney to the couch to sit.

Sydney kept smiling down at the ring on her mother's hand and then to the one on her own.

"I can't believe it! Have you set a date?" She bubbled excitedly with bright eyes.

"We want to keep our anniversary so-" Irina couldn't even finish before Sydney started screaming again.

"Next month!" Sydney bounced where she sat. "Another Valentine's Day wedding!" She smiled from ear to ear. "Oh I can't wait!" She squealed as Irina giggled at her excited daughter. "Wait a minute. I don't know why I never thought of this before but, you and Dad," Sydney's eyebrows narrowed and then she giggled deeply, "Last year, you were in Panama on your anniversary." She couldn't contain her giggles and they developed into a deviant laugh, "Is 'that' part of the reason for your… How shall we say, 'reunion,' the night Lena here was conceived?"

"Perhaps it was in the back of both our minds." Irina smirked as she shrugged thinking about that night with great fondness.

"_Riiiight!_" Sydney giggled hysterically. "The day of '_loooooooove_." She accentuated and elongated the word sounding like Barry White forcing Irina to break into giggles.

"I've been meaning to ask you a question." Irina smiled, sobering up after a minute she took Sydney's hand in her own.

"Me too." Sydney smiled, squeezing her Mother's long fingers.

"Sydney, I would be honored if you would stand up with me as my Maid of Honor when I marry your father again."  
Irina brushed her fingers over Sydney's cheek, putting her long hair behind her ears.

"Yes!" Sydney squealed again, launching herself at Irina with tears of happiness, "That's what I wanted to ask you!"

Irina started laughing over Sydney's shoulder as the two hugged.

"Yes, I'll proudly stand beside my daughter."

Irina felt tears stinging her eyes at how blessed she felt. She and Sydney had come so far, and Irina had long ago let go of the dream of being there on her daughter's wedding day. Now, she was going to be standing beside her.

"So this means you've set a date?" She pulled back smiling.

"We decided in Paris." Sydney smiled, running her thumb over Lena's head as she spoke. "We want to get married on August 30th. By that time, our lives should be somewhat calmer. Sloane and Cuvee captured or dead and out of our lives forever." She added softly. "We want to begin our new life together without worrying about them."

"I understand perfectly." Irina ran her thumb over Sydney's cheek. "And, it will give us ample time to plan the perfect wedding." She smiled warmly.

"What about yours?" Sydney's eyebrows shot up, "We only have a month and a half."

"Sydney," Irina laughed, "Your father and I don't want a big affair. All that matters to us, is having the ones we love there with us. I think we've decided a small gathering in Santa Barbara at the Biltmore is just perfect for us, outdoors, in the beautiful sun with the sounds of the ocean in the background. Perfect." She closed her eyes smiling, already seeing it and Jack's face when he said her real name in his vows.

Sydney bounced again with excitement.

"Well we still have to find you an amazing dress that will make Dad forget his name!"

"Ok." Irina laughed, excited to share this moment with her daughter. "We can go dress shopping together when I get back from Russia."

"You're leaving again?" Sydney's shoulders slumped. "I just got here and you're leaving!"

"Not until Friday." She saw her daughter's disappointment and felt it herself. "But I have some very important business to finish in Moscow and I need to be there to celebrate the Orthodox Christmas. I am also going to go to the archives and go through Rasputin's things that are stored there with a fine tooth comb, hoping to find something that will lead us to Sloane."

"He's just completely disappeared." Sydney sighed, the man's name bringing a halt to their happiness.

"We'll find him, Sydney. We'll find him." Irina sought out Sydney's hand on her lap and held it tightly, speaking with a confident tone. "His arrogance will eventually lead us right to him."

"Well, let's hope that it's soon or I fear the sick-o will have already fertilized your eggs and implanted them in some unsuspecting soul!" Sydney shuddered thinking about it, "I shudder at the thought."

"You and me both." Irina sighed, praying to God that they found him before it got that far.

"Dad said you received an 'interesting' phone call last night? What was that about?" Sydney finally smiled, curious.

"Well," Irina laughed softly, running her finger along the bottoms of Lena's outstretched fingers. "It was Barbara Walters, she wants to interview me…us, as a family."

"What?" Sydney's eyes bugged out in surprise. "Barbara Walters!" She gasped again at how surreal that was to have 'thee Barbara Walters' want to interview them. "When?"

"Well she would like to interview me first, next week in St. Petersburg when we talk about my mother and then…the following week she wants to come here, and interview us as a family." Irina sighed, putting her hair behind her ear.

"And you're going to do it?" Sydney held her breath, fascinated by this all as she was the day of the press conference in Moscow.

"Your father and I agree it would probably be the best way to handle the press here in the United States. Barbara Walters is a respected journalist and by giving her the exclusive, it will save us from doing a lot of other interviews. We both trust her but we wanted to ask if you were 'ok' with it first?" Irina looked up into the shocked face of her eldest daughter.

"Barbara Walters…" Sydney repeated barely above a whisper in awe of the woman. "Well yeah, I agree if anyone is going to get the story right. She's the one we should do it with."

Irina giggled, "Ok. Then I'll have my PR man get back to her."

"You have a PR man?" Sydney's eyes lit up surprised again. "When did that happen?"

"I was left with little choice after all of this craziness." Irina laughed. "He's good at fielding questions. Now…I have some questions for you," She looked deeply into her daughters eyes, "I haven't spoken with Mikhail since they left Russia, what happened with Amelie?"

"Well she wasn't expecting them obviously, so when she came home and saw Vaughn sitting on the couch waiting for her, she was instantly concerned seeing the look on his face. At first she thought maybe I said 'no' when he proposed!" Sydney giggled, lying back against the couch cushions. "He sat her down and said, _'Maman…our miracle has finally come,'_ he said went pale instantly, her eyes beginning to tear before he even said the words, '_he's still alive…he survived the blast, Maman._" She smiled, feeling her own tears forming with the happiness of yet another miracle. So happy for her husband to be to finally share in the happiness and joy she'd felt at having her mother back from the grave. "She started crying silent tears frozen in place until she heard Mikhail's voice behind her. He'd called out 'Bella,' her middle name and the name he always called her with love." She sighed deeply, blinking back tears as did Irina, "Vaughn said his Dad was terrified she would hate him, scream at him but instead…she just stood there looking at him, taking him in and then launched herself into his arms crying mumbling incoherent things in French as he held her. She said she knew in her heart, that he wasn't dead…she still felt their connection that's why she could never remarry. She was confused and upset obviously but they talked and she, like Vaughn, began to understand that Mikhail was really in an impossible situation. That he couldn't have come back to them without endangering them as a fugitive. He explained why he remained in isolation after the Soviet Union fell; his reasons stemming from guilt and remorse at leaving them behind and leaving you to die in Kashmir."

"And now?" Irina took a deep breath, listening intently.

"When Vaughn and I left, they were trying to find a way to work past it. It's going to take time; they have a lot to work through." Sydney nodded, thinking about it herself.

"Yes, it will take time. But if the love is still there they'll find away back to each other." Irina smiled through her tears knowing all to well what they were going through and so happy for her friend and his family. "How's Michael?" She smiled thinking about how happy her future son-in-law must be to have his parents again.

"He couldn't stop smiling all the way home." Sydney smiled, batting at her tears. "He was like a little kid and I knew exactly what he was feeling. He'd been worried that his mother would be too upset, too hurt to forgive his father and somewhere inside of him, he wanted them to find that love they once shared. That's exactly the way I felt after seeing the two of you in India on the train. Seeing for myself, the happiness that once existed between the two of you still lying beneath your surfaces." She smiled brightly thinking about her surprise when her mother had leaned over and kissed her father for the first time in front of her while they were in the train station. "I guess every kid wants their parents together. Vaughn and I were no exception. I'm very happy for you, Mom…happy for the both of you." She added softly after studying her mother's reaction for a moment.

"Thank you, Sweetheart." Irina wiped at her own tears and leaned forward, hugging Sydney with her one free arm as she kissed her temple. "And I'm so happy for you! It looks as those this year is going to be very good to all of us."

"I hope so." Sydney laughed. "Now…my future husband should be arriving any time with Dad so that we can all have dinner together." She smiled brightly. "We've decided to dig out our old home movies!" She giggled deeply thinking about how much fun that was going to be.

"Well, I need to go to the store to pick up some groceries for tonight's dinner and of course we'll need popcorn for those films." She laughed, excited to see her past with her family for the first time in a long time. "You want to come with me?" Irina stood, patting Lena's back as she turned the baby in her arms.

"Absolutely, I used to love going to the grocery store with you!" Sydney beamed, thrilled to be doing something so small, yet special with her mother again. "You used to drive the cart like a race car driver. It all makes sense now!" She laughed thinking about her mother's driving that day a few weeks ago on the PCH with the police pursuit.

"Yes, it was always so much fun with you…though I don't think you'll fit in the cart anymore." Irina laughed out loud as she pictured an adult Sydney sitting in the child's seat of the shopping cart. "Maybe we can race each other instead?" She raised her eyebrows in a challenge.

"You're on!" Sydney laughed, accepting the challenge.

Irina left a note for Jack and Vaughn and the three of them set off to the store followed by a team of security.

* * *

"I won!" Sydney said firmly with a crooked grin as they walked in the door an hour later, arms full of bags and followed by two security details helping them with the bags.

"No, Sweetheart. I won." Irina shook her head 'no' trying not to laugh as she set the bags on the counter.

"No, Mom, you cheated! I won! I crossed the line first!" Sydney giggled deeply as Jack and Vaughn entered the kitchen with curious smiles.

"Sydney, there was 'no' line! And I didn't cheat, there were no rules!" Irina laughed as she kissed Jack 'hello.'

"Yuri," Irina turned to the tall Russian bodyguard, with arms folded looking 'authoritative' and intimidating. "You were there, who won?"

"You won, Your Highness." He bowed with a small smile before ducking out quickly.

She turned around to see Sydney standing with hands on hips, her dimple grin and narrowed eyebrows in place as she fumed over her mother's sneaky abilities.

"Of course he's going to say that! He works for you!" Sydney tapped her foot impatiently.

"Fine. Ok. We can say we tied." Irina threw her hands up in the air laughing. "Stubborn!"

"I want a rematch with clearly stated rules next time!" Sydney finally laughed and kissed Vaughn.

"What are you two talking about?" Jack held his breath, wondering what sort of trouble they'd found themselves in this time.

"We were racing shopping carts around the store, and Mom cheated!" Sydney giggled, helping to put the items away.

"I did not cheat! You cannot cheat when there are no rules!" Irina sighed, putting the orange juice in the refrigerator as Jack rolled his eyes and Vaughn chuckled, picking up Lena out of her car seat. "Next time, Sweetheart, don't slow down for the elderly." Irina said in lecturing tone and Sydney's mouth dropped open as the others laughed.

"I can't believe you just said that." Sydney shook her head laughing. "My own mother telling me to plow over an old man with a single can of beans in his cart!"

"I didn't say plow over him! I said don't slow down. You're super spy, whip around him, cut in front of him…do something besides wait patiently for him to cross in front of you!" Irina couldn't stop her body from shaking with held in laughter.

"You're unbelievable!" Sydney laughed and Irina kissed her shoulder as she passed.

"You two raced shopping carts?" Jack shook his head in disbelief putting the loaves of bread in the breadbox. "I think this family needs more action and soon." He added and everyone burst out laughing.

_***So Happy Together***_

"So, My Love, what is for dinner?" Jack brushed his lips over his crazy wife's once more as Vaughn and Sydney stood by watching the exchange with fascination; this side of Jack and Irina always surprising and entertaining.

"I'll give you a hint, Agent Bristow," She waggled her eyebrows and looked at him seductively, knowing she could always use that to her advantage. "It's spicy, and slimy and comes in little white boxes with red scribble writing blazoned across it."

"I thought you were cooking? Now we're ordering Chinese?" He smirked at her with his head cocked to the side, inches from her face.

"I decided that for tonight, cooking is over-rated and I haven't stopped craving Chinese since D.C. So, Sydney called them from the car on the way home. They should be here…" She stopped and smiled when she heard the doorbell. "Now." She kissed his lips again quickly, slapping his chest and ducking under the arm he had trapped her against the fridge with.

They sat in front of the TV, forgoing the plates and decided to eat out of their respective cartons. Irina sat on the floor in front of Jack on the couch and Vaughn sat on the floor, with Lena nestled on his chest in front of Sydney in the chair.

"Look at that hair!" Sydney died laughing seeing her father's full head of brown curls when the first films began to run by. These were films none of them had seen in years and not apart of Irina's on the DVD.

"Well it was the 70s, Syd." Vaughn laughed, biting his lip when he saw Jack scowl. "Personally, I like that shirt, Jack." His body shook with held in laughter.

"Awe..." Sydney cooed when her mother came into frame, wrapping her arms around Jack from behind and jumping on his back, kissing his ear smiling when he held her.

"See now, Mom looks normal." Sydney laughed seeing her mother in cut off denim short and a white tunic shirt. "How old are you there?" She turned to Irina who was smiling quietly watching she and Jack on the screen.

"I was eighteen." She smiled softly, shaking her head at how young that was, but how happy they were even then.  
She and everyone else started laughing when Jack started spinning them in fast circles on screen, making her laugh and slap his shoulder to stop. When he finally did, he was so dizzy he fell over and she landed on top of him laughing hysterically. It cut quickly to a close up of her beautiful face and brilliant smile. When she winked at the camera she started laughing and Jack pulled back on the camera.

"You two are so cute." Sydney smiled from ear to ear and even Vaughn had to agree with that assessment, much to his own disbelief of associating the word 'cute' with Jack Bristow.

"Australia." Irina sighed happily when it cut to them on their engagement trip. "We had so much fun." She turned her head to Jack and he dropped his spicy lips to hers, kissing her with a smile and not 'really caring' if his daughter was grossed out or not.

"Yes, it was very fun. So fun in fact, its where your name came from." He smiled at Sydney, happy to find her smiling at her parents instead of cringing.

"And why I bought a house there." Irina added with her devious grin, seeing their eyebrows shoot up.

"You have a house there, too? Why am I not surprised?" Jack smiled shaking his head. "I hope at least it's on the water!"

"Yes, right on the harbor. Very beautiful…one of my favorite homes for sentimental reasons of course." She smiled coyly, "I had a spectacular view of the Millennium fireworks."

"I bet." Sydney laughed, sticking her chopsticks in a chunk of chicken as she watched her father filming her mother on some beach, making her laugh. "So you spend a lot of time there?"

"Yes actually. Especially before Alexander was finished, it was my main residence." She caught another look of surprise from them, "I haven't been there since just after Mexico City." She smiled softly at Sydney, remembering that horrible phone call from her contact inside the CIA telling her that her daughter was missing a couple days later.


	38. Chapter 38

_**AN:** **The music of this chapter REALLY adds to these scenes. So if you generally skip the music, I highly suggest at least listening to the last 4 songs while reading! It's going to get you jazzed for all the crazy drop-offs this story is about to take! Hold on to the wild roller-coaster ride!**_

_**Music for this chapter (on repeat): Ev'ry Time We Say Goodbye **_**by Julie London**_**, You and Me **_**by Lifehouse**_**, Protectors of the Earth (choir) **_**by****Two Steps from Hell**_**, Myth, Power, Beauty **_**by Nick Glennie- Smith**_** from the Secretariat Soundtrack, PM's Love Theme by Craig Armstrong from the Love Actually Soundtrack, A Storm is Coming by Hans Zimmer from The Dark Knight Rises Soundtrack.**_

* * *

THIRTY-EIGHT

o

_***Ev'ry Time We Say Goodbye***_

"I hate this." Jack grumbled as he finished fastening Lena's car seat into the back of the car that was taking she and Irina to the airport. Eight days without them was going to be hell and he knew it.

Sydney had promised Irina to keep her father occupied and busy, eating dinner with him a few nights while she was absent and making him get out of the house.

"I don't like it either." Irina sighed, from under the protection of the umbrella shielding them from the pouring rain.  
"I'm going to miss you."

"I'm going to miss you, too. Both of you." He brushed her hair behind her ear as he stood beneath the protective canopy with her. "I don't think I'll sleep at all without you in my arms. I've grown to accustomed to it now." He smiled softly.

"Me too. I promise I'll call you every night before I go to sleep, and you call me." She ran her hand over his cheek and he caught it, kissing her palm and holding it against his face again. "I love you."

"I love you." He smiled into her beautiful brown eyes and leaned in to kiss her softly. "Please be careful."

"I promise and I'm sure everything will be fine with the massive security detail following my every move." She smiled brightly, laughing softly. "We'll be back before you know it!" She kissed him again, threading her fingers through her hair, only stopping with the pressing need for air. "Bye…" She smiled softly and ducked into the car.

* * *

"I'll be damned. Jack, did you see this?" Kendall tossed the magazine he'd just pulled out of the briefing mail across the table. FORTUNE magazine featured Irina on the cover with bold titles that read, '_Russia's Secret Savior' an exclusive, 'Business as usual for The Romanov, closing a $400 Billion dollar oil deal for Russia with Japan._'

Jack picked up the magazine and felt his heartstrings tug seeing his wife that he missed so much.

"No, I hadn't seen it but she told me about it the other night when she called. She's been working on it for quite some time." He smiled, proud of Irina for closing the single largest deal in Russian history. "Do you remember that first night I called you from St. Petersburg, just after we found her?" Jack looked over at Kendall, then to Dixon who was also in the room.

"Yeah, I remember." Kendall nodded, continuing to go through the mail.

"She was on the phone that night with the Prime Minister of Japan discussing this even back then." Jack laughed softly and handed the magazine to Dixon who wanted to see it.

"$400 billion dollars…_Whew_!" Dixon blew out in astonishment as he twirled from side to side in his chair.

"Why the hell weren't we in on that deal?" Kendall boomed, throwing the rest of the mail onto the table. "I mean, christ! This country is in desperate need of oil and we're tired of dealing with the Middle-East. Bush is all chummy with Irina now and you're married to her for God-sake! You'd think we could have worked out something with her?"

"The United States offer wasn't as great as that of Japan's." Jack shrugged with a smile, "And Irina's a brilliant business woman after all, she's got to go with what's best for Russia."

"Well shit! A lot of good it does us to have connections then." Kendall sighed before cracking a smile.

"Not to mention they returned her $80 billion dollars of the stolen Romanov fortune before she would close the deal."  
Dixon laughed reading over the article. "Adding to her already enormous fortune and making her the wealthiest person in the world now, surpassing the Sultan of Brunei."

"Christ, Bristow!" Kendall boomed as his face paled with shock, "What the hell are you still doing here working at this shitty government job if your wife is the wealthiest person on the goddamn planet?"

"Because that makes her an even bigger target." Jack deadpanned, in all seriousness knowing just how much danger his wife was still in. "And I'm not leaving this job until we find and stop Sloane and I find and gut Gerard Cuvee for what he's done to her." His anger seethed out between pursed lips thinking about that man as his rage called from deep inside him. "She'll never be safe unless he's eliminated."

"Agreed." Kendall added firmly, finding it easier now agreeing with Jack where Irina was concerned. He wanted a crack at the goddamn bastard for what he'd seen on those tapes his anger ran so deep and could only imagine what Jack had felt as it was his wife…the mother of his children. "We'll get the bastards, both of 'em."

"When are they coming back?" Dixon swallowed hard, taking a deep breath as his mind raced back to the images of Irina in Kashmir and made him nauseous again.

"Sunday morning sometime. Lena has her two month check up on Monday." Jack sighed, resuming his scanning of the possible Intel into Sloane's whereabouts.

Dubey had contacted Irina but had nothing new to report. For as much as Jack disliked the man because of his former relationship with Irina, he seemed to be honestly helping them in his efforts to track down Zamir and Sloane.

"Two months already. Wow." Dixon smiled thinking about his own children. "They certainly grow up fast don't they? Too fast." He looked at Jack knowing he felt the same.

"Yeah, they do. I still remember when Sydney was just learning how to walk and look at her now." Jack smiled half amused have terrified at that thought.

"How is Irina doing, Jack?" Dixon asked softly, concerned for his friend, and now after the past few months, Irina herself. Something he still had a hard time believing after despising the woman for so long.

Jack sighed heavily and folded the folder in his hands, looking up to meet the concern in Dixon's eyes as well as Kendall's.

"Well, we're still having a hard time learning her new limitations as a diabetic. We've had a couple of pretty big scares when her sugar dropped too low." He admitted, unsure 'why,' he was suddenly comfortable talking about such things. Irina was having an effect on him. "She almost fell into a diabetic coma over Christmas."

"Dear God." Dixon sat back alarmed. "What happened?"

"Her sugar just dropped too low and we didn't realize it until she dropped to her knees and blacked out. Her lips got that blue ring around them, like the day of her Execution." He looked up to see them nodding, they remembered that well too. "Scared the shit out of me."

"I can imagine that would." Kendall added softly, folding his hands in front of his face, resting his elbows on the table understanding why that would 'scare' even Jack Bristow. He even had nightmares of Irina's execution though he would never admit to it.

"The next morning she was burning up with raging fever and Irina is _never_ sick. Turns out she went running in Moscow when she was there in single digit temperatures. Her lungs are so damaged, so fragile now from the effects of the Lethal Injection they started hemorrhaging. That led to pleurisy in her lungs again which caused her heart to beat erratically. She was on bed rest for three days and I've never seen her sleep that much in my life." He sighed shaking his head before breaking into a small grin, "It was quite the intense Holiday Season."

"I would expect nothing less from Christmas in Russia with the Bristows and Irina Derevko." Dixon laughed as Kendall cracked a smile, nodding in agreement.

"Sydney and Vaughn getting engaged." Dixon smiled.

"And Vaughn's father turning up alive." Kendall raised his eyebrows sighing.

"Yeah, that certainly surprised the hell out of all of us." Jack admitted quietly thinking about first seeing the man holding his baby and standing over his wife while she slept.

"And Vaughn said that Irina honestly didn't know?" Kendall asked, confirming what he had heard and not sure if he quite believed it.

"No, she had no idea." Jack shook his vehemently, "I had the same thoughts when I first saw the man but I was there at first she thought she was hallucinating because of her fever but when she first realized he was alive, standing in front her, she fainted. Irina had no idea. She'd thought he had died escaping, just as she told us and Mikhail thought she had died in Kashmir."

"Wow, this is all so... unbelievable still." Dixon shook his head pondering it all.

"I heard Weiss talking to Vaughn about 'you getting attacked by a Siberian Tiger or something," Kendall looked at Jack perplexed, "What that hell was that all about?"

* * *

_***You and Me***_

Irina had left Russia earlier then anticipated having finished everything she needed to and was now sneaking into their house in LA in the very early morning hours. She laid the sleeping baby in her bassinet before quietly removing her clothes, smiling at Jack as he slept in their bed. His hair was wild from his restless sleep and a scowl was affixed to his face as slept. Carefully, she slid back her side of the covers and into bed next to him, getting as close as she could without disturbing him. She debated for a moment whether or not to wake him but couldn't take it any longer and kissed him lightly on the lips, letting hers linger until she felt the flutter of his eyelashes against hers.

"Hi." She whispered into his face, smiling from ear to ear at his surprise.

"Hi." He whispered back when he realized he wasn't dreaming feeling her warm breath against his face. "When did you get here?"

"Just now." She smiled, leaning in for another kiss and Jack wrapped his arms around her, rolling her on top of him under their covers.

"I. Missed. You." He said between heated kisses of desperation.

"I missed you, too." She laughed softly, enjoying the warmth of his naked skin against hers.

"You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." He smiled, running his hands up her naked back, his hands dipping into her soft flesh. "This last week was hell."

Irina smiled at how cute he looked with his sleepy eyes and bed-head. She slowly dropped her lips to his, capturing them between her own as her dark cocooned them inside falling over her face. Her tongue darted out seeking his warmth and relishing in just being in his arms.

"Mmm." Jack moaned happily against her mouth feeling himself getting aroused beneath her weight.

"Mmm." Irina smiled against his lips 'feeling' just how happy Jack was to see her growing beneath her. "Morning wood…what a fantastic way to welcome me home, Honey." She laughed and her body vibrated against his.

Jack's hands slid down her body again and to her hips as Irina dropped her legs to his sides. Feeling herself already wet and not wanting to wait any longer after their long separation she pushed herself up slightly with her arms on either side of Jack's shoulders, sliding herself up his body, aligning herself with his growing excitement.

When she felt his head tickling her core, she slid back hard and impaled herself onto him as her mouth met his in a hungry kiss.

"Oh God, I missed you." She moaned against his mouth feeling her muscles contracting around him. "I've been aching for you all week." She whined in a needy voice against his lips as Jack's hands began rocking her body against his, sliding in and almost out before driving into her again making them both moan in pleasure.

"I know that feeling." Jack panted against her face in a whisper and then groaned when she clamped onto him insider her with her powerful muscles. "Oh God, Irina, you feel so good." He moaned into her mouth as her deviant tongue swept across the roof of his mouth, sucking his tongue in sync with her clenching driving him mad. His hands moved up her body as Irina took over their thrusting, fingering the soft curves of her breast and finding her nipples, rock hard and grating against his chest like sharp glass. His thumbs running circles around both before finally flicking her hard peaks and eliciting a sharp intake of breath from her with his efforts.

She quickened her pace using her abs and thighs, needing to satisfy the aching deep inside her as fast as possible with an explosive release. Jack felt the same desperation and moved one hand down between their bodies to find her engorged clit, swollen and throbbing with every rapid beat of her heart. The moment his fingers came in contact with her pleasure point she gasped for air, moaning in happiness and Jack felt her tremble inside.

"Faster Jack." She commanded through heavy eyes as she picked up her own pace.

Jack pinched and rolled her nipple and clit simultaneously making Irina gasp for every breath as she ground herself into him and Jack began lifting his hips from the bed matching her th breast and finding her nipples, rock hard and grating against his chest like sharp glass. His thumbs running circles around both before finally flicking her hard peaks and eliciting a sharp intake of breath from her with his efforts.

She quickened her pace using her abs and thighs, needing to satisfy the aching deep inside her as fast as possible with an explosive release.

Jack felt the same desperation and moved one hand down between their bodies to find her engorged clit, swollen and throbbing with every rapid beat of her heart. The moment his fingers came in contact with her pleasure point she gasped for air, moaning in happiness and Jack felt her tremble inside.

"Faster Jack!" She commanded as her heat enveloped him. Just the feel of being inside her warm tight space causing his breath to catch and her every moan of pleasure aroused him that much more and he became determined to make her come as fast as possible. His hands worked feverishly as did his hips, pounding his length into her feeling her getting close.

"_Ahhh…_" She sucked in a long breath as she began to feel the small tremor building inside her. "Jack…" She mewed turning her head to the side as her eyes screwed shut with the building explosion inside her.

Knowing how to push her over the edge after years of experience, his scorching tongue took advantage of the new angle her neck presented and traced lazy circles in the spot just below her ear.

Irina immediately gasped and shuddered before flying over the edge with a loud moan and strangled scream, biting her lip in an attempt to remain somewhat quiet and not wake their baby. Jack's hands gripped her hips hard and with new determination continued pounding into her, thrust for thrust watching her face contort in pleasure and wanting to make it last as long as possible for her, knowing he wouldn't be far behind.

He felt his abdominals begin clenching involuntarily signaling his release was about to happen and he dug his heels in and grabbed her ass as Irina slid her legs further apart for him, allowing him to go deeper and he groaned loudly feeling the explosion inside him shoot through his body and into hers.

The sensation, reviving Irina's nerves and causing another wave of intense pleasure to flood her senses feeling his body convulsing inside her. They continued to ride each other out until they were both spent and gasping for air.

"Welcome…home, My Love." Jack panted between breaths with a sated smile on his face. Irina remained lying on his chest, feeling his heart pounding against her ear as her own breathing evened out.

"It's good to be home." She smiled happily, running her hands up his sides and propping herself up to look at him when she stopped trembling. "I love you, Jack." She smiled at him with her flushed face and dark eyes, dropping her mouth to capture his in one last lingering kiss before she rolled off of him and snuggled into his side with her head on his shoulder, arm draped over his chest.

Jack pulled the sheets and blanket back up and over them, turning his head and kissed her forehead before returning the sentiment in her own tongue. "Thank God it's Sunday." Jack smiled happily wrapping his arms around her and they snuggled in closer to one another, yawning slightly before closing his eyes again, falling asleep quickly, his exhaustion taking over.

Irina lifted her head when she felt his breathing even out to look at his face in his sleep, smiling brightly when she saw that he was no longer scowling like he had been when she first came in but was now smiling. She turned her head back and closed her own eyes, letting her own body succumb to the Sleep Gods.

* * *

They both slept well into the morning after a week of sleepless nights. Irina was 'Thankful' that Lena was still on her sleep schedule from Russia, allowing them to sleep that late; and the three of them enjoyed a lazy morning together, before Irina began to tell Jack what she'd discovered in Rasputin's things.

Jack gasped in shock when she set the piece of parchment paper in front of him.

"That is a drawing, a self-portrait of Rambaldi himself. I tested the paper and ink." She sighed sitting down next to him at the table while Lena sat wide-eyed in her swing beside them. "This is a page from the Rambaldi manual. Somehow it was separated when the Soviets ransacked the archives." She reached into her briefcase and removed two other photos, setting them beside the drawing of Rambaldi.

"Rasputin and Sloane." Jack hissed out immediately seeing the genetic similarities.

"Yes." Irina sighed, and bit her lip resting her head against her hand as she leaned on the table, "They all have the same face. Same shape, same nose, same beady little eyes. They give me the creeps." She shuddered. "Pure evil in both of these men. It's no wonder The Prophecy Child would bring utter desolation to the world." She hissed and Jack ran his hand down her back in comfort, knowing how upsetting it had to be for her to know her role in it. "The thought of Sloane fertilizing my eggs with this genetic DNA material makes me want to vomit." She stood suddenly, trembling and walked towards Lena, kneeling down beside her taking deep, relaxing breaths as she smiled at her beautiful baby, soothing the anger, rage inside her over what Sloane had done.

"We will stop him before he can go through with this sick plan, Irina." Jack spoke softly as he stood, walking toward them. He pulled her up beside him, turning her to face him as he wrapped his strong loving arms around her, kissing her temple as his hand stroked over her head and down the length of her long silky hair.

She wrapped her arms around him whispering into his shoulder, almost afraid to say out loud the feeling she couldn't shake.

"What if it's already begun, Jack?"

* * *

"Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!" Weiss came tearing around the corner in the Ops. Floor at lightening pace, almost knocking Agent Crane over, waving something in his hand with shock and surprise written all over his face as he came bursting into the conference room.

Sydney, Vaughn, Dixon, Jack, Kendall and Marshall were all ready seated and waiting for him when they saw the commotion on the floor.

Weiss stood before them out of breath and panting.

"Well, what the hell is it?" Kendall scowled as they all sat waiting for some kind of explanation.

"Where's Irina?" Weiss asked noticing her absence at this meeting about possible leads into Sloane's whereabouts.

"She's in the gym going through her evaluation. What is this about Agent Weiss?" Jack looked agitated. The lack of information on Sloane was grating on his nerves and the frustration was starting to take its toll in his lack of patience.

"This!" Weiss held up TIME magazine, pointing to Irina's face on the cover. "She's TIME magazine's _Person of The Year!_"

"Oh my God!" Sydney flew out of her chair in surprise, tearing the magazine out of Weiss's hands with her mouth open.

"That's what I said!" Weiss smiled, looking over her shoulder, "Do you know how 'huge' this is? Shit! Double shit!"

Jack was equally stunned even with all the recent press coverage.

"It's likely because she just closed a $400 billion dollar oil deal." Dixon smirked, twirling his pen in his fingers. "Then again, she was also found out to be the daughter of Anastasia Romanov, the ruling force in Russia, a former KGB operative married to a CIA operative, went to prison for treason, was arrested, had a baby in prison cell and last but certainly not least, is the _only_ person to have ever survived Lethal Injection. I'd say she certainly had a helluva year."

"That pretty much sums it up but that's nothing compared to this!" Weiss ripped the magazine away from Sydney again, "Sorry." He gave her an apologetic look as he flipped through the pages. "Here!" He pointed rapidly at the dark print at the bottom of the page.

"Oh my God!" Sydney gasped with her mouth hanging open again.

"_That's what I said_!" Weiss' eyebrows shot up as he smirked nodding his head. "Oh. My. God!"

"Would you people stop saying that and just tell us what is so goddamn fascinating?" Kendall boomed from a cross the table, slapping his hand and making Marshall jump.

"It says that the people of Russia have added Mom's name to the election ballot." Sydney's face was ashen as she spoke slowly, "As the Empress of," she paused, "an _Imperial Russia_."

"Oh my God!" Kendall repeated their sentiment, sitting back heavily in his chair with his own mouth open.

"When did this happen and why didn't we know?" Jack shook out of his temporary numbness and was immediately angered they had to find out in a magazine.

"It just came out a couple of hours ago. Last minute to hit the press here and in Russia. The election is still going, all the votes haven't been tallied yet." Weiss added excitedly, shifting his weight on his feet.

Jack leaned forward taking a deep breath and began rubbing his temple. _'Shit was about to hit the fan!' _He and Irina hadn't talked anymore about this, they were so busy trying to find Sloane.

"She doesn't know does she?" Dixon gazed across the table at Jack, reading his behavior.

"No, she doesn't." He sighed heavily. They already had so much going on in their lives without adding this to it.

"Can I tell her? Can I tell her? Can I tell her? _Please_?" Weiss asked rapidly with his excitement, almost bouncing next to Sydney.

"Fine." Jack pushed off from the table, leaning heavily against the back of his own chair, "But!" He said quickly, seeing Weiss was about to tear out of the room to the gym, "Wait until she's finished in the gym." He knew this news was going to be a tremendous shock to her, finding out that the, _'Russian public has voted for you and Imperial Russia again._' They still had to confirm it anyway.

"Imperial Russia…Wow." Marshall's cheeks glowed with adoration as he smiled at Sydney. "So your Mom's going to be the official ruler now?"

"Well just because she's on the ballot doesn't mean she'll win the popular vote and even if she does, it doesn't mean she has to accept." Jack's tone was even and flat, his mind buzzing with what this could mean. "Irina's ultimately the one who will decide what she wants to do."

"And go against the popular vote? Won't that piss everyone off?" Weiss' eyebrows narrowed, not understanding why 'anyone' would not want to accept being the ruler of the world's largest country. _To be the Tsar!_

"She told me and Katya," Sydney swallowed the massive lump in her throat thinking about what Weiss had said, "That she wanted to keep things the way they are. But he's right, Dad. How's she going to be able to do that if the people want otherwise?"

* * *

**_*Protectors of the Earth (choir)*_**

Irina was running at full speed up an inclined treadmill and had been for the last hour. Small circular electrodes were stuck to her temples, over her heart and lungs, two over her exposed abs as she ran in a black sports bra and running shorts.

They were measuring her brainwaves, lung capacity, oxygen intake, conversion rates, muscle function and her heartbeat. Another small patch with a needle was threaded into her abdominals monitoring her insulin levels and adjusting the dosage accordingly.

For the last two weeks she'd been pushing her body hard, knowing she was going to have to be in top shape again for battle ahead with Sloane, especially since she was the one in the Prophecy that held the responsibility of stopping him.

Her body had been so weakened by the Execution and her new Diabetes she was forced to take some drastic action to get herself back in top-notch condition while keeping herself within the safe limits of her new body.

The best athletic trainers and doctors the CIA had were brought in to set up a plan for the rebuilding of her body and much to his surprise, Dr. Ryan Peterson, Irina's former student and primary physician after the Execution was brought in to monitor her bodily functions since he knew her health the best at this point.

"Everything is looking excellent, Irina." Dr. Peterson smiled at her as he read the monitors projecting her results.  
"I'm going to have you start slowing down now before we speed you back up." He punched a couple of buttons and the incline began to slowly drop, as did the speed. "Your recovery and progress is simply amazing. Unbelievable really considering what you survived." He kept smiling shaking his head in disbelief as he wrote the results in her file. "I am still having a hard time with the fact you're a super spy and not an English Professor." He laughed, as did Irina while she kept running, her long hair pulled back in a loose ponytail that swayed with her steps like a pendulum keeping time.

"I am both, Dr. Peterson." She flashed him her brilliant smile before curling her lip up to blow the stray hair from her eyes as she kept her pace.

"I just wish I could tell Ann what I've been doing these last few weeks and with 'whom!" He shook his head watching his former 'Mrs. Robinson' tear up the treadmill with her astounding pace, rippling muscles and exotic beauty. "She'd never believe it. She's still grappling with the fact that you're alive and were really a KGB spy when you taught us. The whole, 'Tsar of Russia' thing really has her thrown for a loop." He kept laughing as he took a seat on the chair in front of the thread-mill.

"I'm sorry you can't tell her." Irina looked at him with her apologetic eyes and smile.

"You haven't even told me. What are you training for anyway? Armageddon?" His eyebrows raised with his smile, hoping he would finally get out of her what exactly she was doing with the CIA.

"That's Classified." She smiled her enigmatic grin, having given him that answer at least a hundred times over the course of this training period.

"Well, I'd certainly never want to take you on." He shook his head using a serious tone, causing Irina to laugh. He'd seen her at her best tearing apart her daring opponents in various forms of martial arts: Karate, Tai chi, Tae-kwan do, Judo, Ninjutsu, Krav Maga, Kickboxing and Kung Fu. Her weapons, other then her own body, had included bows, swords, knives, and Chinese stars. She'd flipped off the walls, off ropes, off her opponents and anything else that stood in her way of defeating the 'enemy.' The woman was a well-built 'machine,' a furious tornado of destruction that few had ever seen.

"I'll tell you what." Irina spoke through her heavy breathing with a smile, "When this is all over with, the mission that is. Why don't you and Ann have dinner with Jack and I? I'll even cook!" She laughed thinking about how much she owed the man before her. He'd saved her life after her execution and now he was helping to train her for the battle of her life.

"She would love that! As would I." He smiled brightly, flashing her his pearly whites.

"Then it's a date!" Irina smiled back and wiped at a rolling rivulet of sweat on her forehead with the back of her hand.

"Are you ready?" He asked, moving to stand in front of the treadmill and waiting for her nod, "Here we go." He smiled, punching the buttons again increasing her speed dramatically until she was sprinting full-speed.

"Is she done yet?" Weiss came bounding up to the group twenty minutes later that had amassed in front of the monitor to the gym, watching Irina's evaluation.

"No, but look at her go! _Christ!_ She's been running like that for almost two hours!" Kendall stood amazed with hands on hips, realizing now, after watching her train for the last few weeks why this woman had been so hard to find and apprehend. "How the hell far do you think she's run at that speed?"

Irina could be seen on the small screen running at a furious pace as the doctors and trainers circled around her like vultures, chatting to themselves about data and to Irina.

"Thirty-five miles in two hours. Three and a half minute miles, is her average." Marshall stood transfixed staring at the screen while he chewed his fingernail nervously.

"_Shit!_ She's like Super Woman!" Weiss gawked at the screen, "How can anyone train like that?" It was no wonder to them all, that Irina was The Chosen One; the subject of a prophecy made hundreds of years ago about a single human being, who would 'possess unseen marks' that made her astounding and would change the world forever.

"It's how the Soviets used to train all of their agents and athletes." Jack added quietly, staring up at his wife with a sigh, "It's the only way she knows how to train. 'All out' with every thing she has. It was expected and demanded from them."

"Well, it's no wonder the Soviet Union used to kick our ass in the Olympics if they all trained like this!" Weiss smiled, laughing, "It's like she's Rocky."

"No, she wouldn't be Rocky you idiot." Vaughn shook his head laughing as the others looked on, "She'd be Drago the Soviet. Remember how he trained? Same way she is now, without the steroids of course." He looked quickly to Jack and Sydney seeing their furrowing eyebrows.

"Oh yeah…" It suddenly dawned on Weiss. "His need to be the best in the world was driving him on."

"As Irina's hatred of Sloane is driving her on." Vaughn added softly, seeing the woman on the screen sprinting at a furious pace.

"Well, I'd hate the bastard with as much passion as she does, too, if the ass-clown troll stole my eggs and planned on fertilizing them himself to make the 'utter desolation' child." Weiss narrowed his eyebrows thinking about his own hatred of Sloane. "She has every right to be pissed off. Arvin Sloane is going to rue the day he messed with Mother Russia and I only hope I'm there to see it!" The corners of his mouth turned up hearing a few chuckles before breaking into a full grin.

"Um, Agent Bristow." Carrie approached the group carrying Lena who was wide-awake and sucking feverishly on her pacifier. She'd volunteered for babysitting duty while Irina went through her evaluation. Both Sydney and Jack turned to face her. "Ok…I guess either of you will know the answer to my question." She mumbled nervously under Jack's intense gaze, "Lena's getting pretty hungry and I didn't know if I should give her the bottle Ms. Derevko…Mrs. Bristow…Agent Derevko…or am I supposed to call her Empress now?" She stumbled over what to call Irina and Jack rolled his eyes._ 'This woman was perfect for Marshall.' _

"Any of those will work." Sydney laughed smiling. "But I think Agent Derevko would be appropriate in this setting."

"Ok, well 'she' left me with a bottle for Lena but also said that if the baby woke close to the end of her evaluation to 'pacify' her long enough until she could feed her, herself. So my question is, much longer until she's finished because this baby is getting mad."

Lena had just spit out the little plastic and rubber device and was turning red with anger, face contorted, fists clenched before letting out a thunderous cry making everyone stop what they' were doing and look.

"It's ok, shhhh." Carrie tried to sooth her, wiggling the pacifier in her mouth, trying to stop her from crying.

After a few snorts of disgust, Lena latched onto the little rubber substitute and turned her face into Carrie.

"Feed her the bottle. It's ok." Jack replied quickly in a harsh tone before smiling at the young woman who was helping them out. He knew he shouldn't take his bad mood out on her. It wasn't her fault that a potential lead turned out to be nothing. "Irina's almost finished but she will still have to take a shower and change her clothes."

"Won't she be upset?" Carrie asked still terrified of Irina Derevko's wrath even if she had proved to be a very loving woman.

"She'll be more upset if she comes up here and hears her baby screaming in hunger. Trust me." He nodded with a small smile walking past her and dropping a kiss to Lena's head, "Feed her the bottle."

"Ok then." She shrugged with a smile.

"You're really great with her. You're going to make a great mother." Marshall smiled, bumbling nervously standing before his girlfriend. "Uh yeah."

"Thanks." She gave him a lazy smile, running her hand over Lena's little head as she kept nuzzling her shirt. "Baby, I don't have what you're looking for. You'll have to look to your mother for that." She laughed, as did everyone else, except for Kendall who only cracked a smile, shaking his head as the vision of Irina Derevko breastfeeding the newborn baby in her cell flooded his mind.

Lena started kicking as her little face turned red with anger again and she let out another wail, tired of not getting what she wanted from the inept rubber nipple.

"Oh, temper, temper." Carrie furrowed her brow, trying to get the cap of Lena's bottle with one hand. Marshall jumped in and snapped it off, giving it to the baby who still cried in anger, not what she wanted.

"Wow, she's mad." He looked at the tiny baby perplexed and tense.

"She wants Mom." Sydney smiled, realizing her sister had a pattern of hating the bottle in favor of her mother when first presented with the substitute. "Here ,she'll start eating if you do this," Sydney took the bottle and swirled the nipple inside Lena's mouth causing little drops of her mother's milk to hit her tongue and alert her to the fact it was indeed something to eat. Lena attacked it once she realized what it was and quieted immediately. Sydney smiled happily, kissing Lena's little fingers.

"That was amazing." Marshall smiled brightly in awe of the woman he'd always had a crush on.

"Yes, great work, Agent Bristow." Weiss responded in a mockingly deep voice before breaking into a smile. "You've gotten your sister to accept a cheap imitation instead of the real thing. Years of experience in pulling that move, I assume." Everyone laughed, including Sydney, remembering her days as SD-6 when she would steal something and give the real item to the CIA and the imitation to Sloane.

"Ok, ok. I know you'd all just love to stand here all day and watch Derevko run or discuss the baby but we do have work to do." Kendall cocked his eyebrow, trying his best to look stern. Grumbling could be heard under the breath of many as they passed him, Carrie and Lena…all of them kissing the baby's head on the way by. Lena had become a regular at the Ops. Floor and everyone had fallen in love with her from the day she was born.

Carrie raised her eyebrows expectantly at Kendall, waiting for him to follow suit and with a grumble under his own breath, like he was being forced to do something he didn't want to, he quickly dropped a kiss to Lena's soft dark hair as he breezed by. Carrie smiled, knowing the truth. Director Kendall had become quite fond of the little baby and loved any opportunity he had to hold her, or snuggle her…though he'd always grumble before hand, putting up an act as the 'arrogant ass.'

* * *

Irina entered the Ops center a half hour later, showered and changed into her dark skirt and suit jacket, looking impeccable and completely put together.

Watching as her as she strode across the floor with determination, you'd never have guessed she had just sprinted 37 miles over the last 2 hours.

Irina went straight for Carrie and the baby, her smile growing as she took her little bundle of joy from the young woman, snuggling her face against her sweet baby's head and thanking Carrie for looking after her while she was away. Irina felt as though everyone were staring at her walking across the floor but shrugged it off, still running on adrenaline and happy when she knocked softly on the glass doors of the conference room where the others had assembled again.

Six heads turned in her direction and all of them cracked a smile seeing her standing there with Lena and a smile on her face, especially Jack, who waved her in.

"Hi." She addressed them quietly, with a smile as Jack stood and pulled out a chair for her to sit beside him.  
"So what have I missed?" She looked around at all the curious faces, knowing she had missed 'something' by the way they were all looking at her.

Kendall leaned forward, and pushed the magazine in her direction.

"Oh my…" She whispered in Russian as her eyes went wide staring at herself on the cover of TIME. Complete disbelief washing over her features as she read and re-read the fact they'd chosen her for the _Person of the Year._

"Well, this is certainly interesting." She sighed, switching back to English and swayed gently from side to side holding Lena to her chest with her cheek resting against the soft downy hair on her daughter's head.

"Interesting indeed." Kendall's eyebrows arched looking at the woman before him who had no idea what had just happened in her country 10,000 miles away.

_***Myth, Power and Beauty***_

"Irina, turn to page 8," Weiss' eyebrows matched that of Kendall's and Irina scrunched her own brow seeing their reactions. "This morning all of Russia decided they wanted you on the ballot for the election…they want you Empress Irina…to rule an Imperial Russia." He breathed out quickly as he saw Irina's immediate look of surprise before rapidly flipping to page 8, reading for herself what Weiss had just told her.

"I can't believe this. Do we even know?" She looked at Kendall then Jack searching for answers through her own disbelief.

"Do we know if it's been confirmed?" Kendall asked, knowing where she was going, and she nodded, "Yes. We just called a few minute ago and confirmed it. According to the tallied votes coming in…you're going to win by a landslide."

"But I never agreed to this…we never discussed this?" Her eyes flew to Jack. She hadn't been prepared for this so soon, she had been so busy with finding Sloane and stopping the Prophecy. Her mind was racing out of control with her rapid thoughts. She knew the election was being held in Russia, and wanted to stay out of the way, lie-low, which was why she had left the country. 'Out of sight, out of mind' way of thinking. "I expected Vladimir to win another term as President and things would continue on the same way that they had before." She paused to take a shaky breath, "I expressed those wishes when we held the press conference in Moscow. I never put myself on the ballot!"

"We know." Kendall cocked his head breaking into a small grin at how a mass of civilians had taken the power away from the mighty woman, "Apparently, the Russian people did."

"What?" She looked at him like he had grown a third eye suddenly, her voice carrying a slight tremble.

"They wrote it on the bottoms of their ballots adding your name, with a little check mark and voted for you as the ruler of an Imperial Russia." Jack smiled at her softly in disbelief himself, taking her long fingers in his squeezing them for support seeing she was in shock.

"This can't be happening…not now! Not when I need to focus on Sloane! I can't do this!" Her voice raising an octave with every word as the slight panic began settling in.

Everyone in the room sat stunned, having never seen Irina Derevko anywhere near the panic she was in now over the thought of 'the public' taking it upon themselves and voting her official ruler of Imperial Russia.

"I can't accept it." She shook her head staring at the table, as if talking herself out of it, "We'll have to have another election."

"And when they write your name on the ballot again? Irina," Jack used two fingers on her chin to turn her face to his, speaking softly. "It's what the people want."

"Yeah, but I don't know if its what 'I' want, Jack!" She kept her stormy eyes focused on his calm brown orbs. "What 'we' want!"

"I know, Honey, but if you reject what they want, you're going to alienate them and things will get out of control. Massive political unrest…" He ran his thumb over the back of her hand, trying to quall both their nerves.

"He's right, Irina." Kendall added softly, nodding at Marshall who hit the power button on a small black remote and all twelve screens in the room turned on, the sound of singing immediately filling the room.

Each one of the screens showing new coverage of the massive crowds of Russian people gathered outside various public places, with signs for _Imperial Russia, Empress Irina _and_ Mother Russia_, all chanting her name throughout Russia.

In Moscow, tens of thousands of people filled the Red Square flooding into the streets and in St. Petersburg, people lined the fences of Alexander, filled the gardens of Peterhof and the massive courtyard of the Winter Palace.

They were showing small towns across the country throughout Siberia where groups of people had gathered; their faces were smiling as they huddled together in the freezing cold, laughing, drinking and almost all of them singing Russia's anthem over their determined drive to unite their country.

Irina felt tears begin to pool in her eyes seeing, and hearing the love her people had for her…and each other. To see them standing shoulder to shoulder, laughing and smiling together. It was something she hadn't witnessed in Russia in a very, very long time. The entire country was celebrating together, uniting for a common goal. She was absolutely overwhelmed with emotion and fought desperately to keep her tears at bay.

The others in the room watched Irina's reactions with rapt attention looking from her face to the scene on the screens and back again.

Sydney's eyes filled with tears seeing the people's reactions over her mother and especially her mother's reaction to the out-crying of love from them for her.

"The people love you, Irina. I don't see how you can tell them all 'no." Jack spoke softly, and a single tear finally slipped from Irina's eye and rolled down her cheek as she closed them, realizing she couldn't as she listened to their voices fill the room. Somehow, she was going to have to face this fear and accept her responsibility. "Irina, you were born for this. You've already been ruling, you can do this. I'm behind you in whatever you do." He spoke just as softly, with concern for her written all over his face. "So what are you going to do?" He asked the question they were all dying to know the answer to, and waited with bated breath for her to reply that would change their lives and the world.

Irina took a deep breath, closing her eyes and tried calming herself as she thought. After a few long moments of silence, she opened her eyes having regained complete control over her emotions.

"Accept my responsibility. To my country, to my people and to my family... both past and present." She answered quietly, smiling softly when she met Sydney's blurry eyes and smile across the table.

"_Wahoo! Yes!_" Weiss yelped and stood clapping with an enormous smile on his face and the others followed suite, standing and applauding with big smiles and cheers as Jack cupped her face and kissed her lightly with a smile of his own.

The entire Ops floor having witnessed the reply and joyful applause through the glass walls, stood and joined in on celebrating Irina's acceptance; all of them excited and happy for the woman, and the family that had been through so much and they had witnessed most of it with front row seats to all the heartbreak.

Irina stood tall, smiling shyly as she looked around to all the faces beaming with pride and happiness.

"Thank you," she nodded softly, returning the smiles to them all.

Sydney flew around the table, and threw her arms around Irina, crying into her mother's hair with sheer joy.

"So what now?"

Irina smiled softly, running her hand down her daughter's smooth hair.

"We go to Russia."

* * *

_***PM's Love Theme***_

"_It's on! It's on! It's on!_" Marshall screamed standing on a chair and getting everyone's attention in the middle of Ops. Everyone gathered around the TV set with smiles and excitement, as a part of history was about to happen in Moscow any minute.

Irina sat straight and regal, looking absolutely gorgeous in her black suit, calm and collected as she sat center, behind a long table in front of a massive gathering of press from all around the world, flanked on both sides by her family, the Putins and the Cabinet members.

The lights were blinding and hot and the room was filled with the sounds of popping flashes and quiet chatter as they waited for her response to the question.

Jack saw Irina's slight hesitation and reached his hand over and clasped her fingers, into his, giving her a small smile and nod as they stared deeply into one another's eyes for a moment.

"The people have spoken…and I am humbled by the outpouring of love and support that they have shown towards me and my family, towards their country and fellow Russian." She spoke smoothly in Russian with her enchanting voice and gaze that captivated everyone awaiting her response. "It is with great honor that I sit before you today and accept my responsibilities and duties as the future ruler of an Imperial Russia." She smiled as a thunderous round of applause and cheering went up around the room, and all over Russia and the world as people heard her acceptance.

"The Coronation of Her Imperial Empress Tsarina of all Russias: Irina Nikolaevna Alexandra Dmitrievna Romanova Derevkova Bristowova," Vladimir smiled at Irina and then to the jubilant crowd who was screaming louder with every part of her name and title. "And the entire Imperial Family," He paused with a laugh as more enthusiastic screams went out, "Will be held in conjunction with St. Petersburg's 300th Birthday Jubilee in May of this year."

People everywhere in Russia jumped up and down with excitement as the vodka flowed freely.

"_Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!"_ Weiss and Marshall were screaming with joy into each other's faces as the 'pops' of bottles of champagne could be heard echoing around the room.

"Do you know what this means, Marshall?!" Weiss yelled hysterically, bottle of champagne in hand, "We're part of the Imperial Family of Russia as the Godfathers of the Grand Duchess Lena!" He jumped around dancing with glee.

"You people have all lost your minds!" Kendall looked around the room at the complete chaos.

"Oh come on, Kendall!" Weiss thrust a paper Dixie cup of champagne into his hand smiling, "This is the most exciting thing since man walked on the moon! The largest country in the world has _just voted themselves_, back into an Imperial Monarchy with a 'smokin' hot ass-kickin' Tsar on the throne!"

Kendall's eyes bugged out hearing Weiss's reference of Irina.

"Now stop being an ass and drink up!" He scolded and then smiled, toasting his bottle to Kendall's Dixie cup.

* * *

"This is both good and bad for us." Sloane drummed his fingers together, talking to the doctor, watching the press coverage from Russia.

"How so?" He asked with his thick German accent.

"Good, because it will keep the baby's mother busy and out of the way for now."

"And bad?"

"Because it will make Irina's death a lot more noticeable."

* * *

"The country is going crazy with joy, Matt," Katie Couric smiled, holding her earpiece to her ear, trying to hear as she watched the roaring crowd of Russians behind her celebrating, "This was just the press conference, I can't imagine what it will be like in four months during the actual Coronation ceremony."

* * *

_***A Storm is Coming***_

"If she makes it that long." Cuvee hissed with a snort, puffing out a long line of smoke with a disgusting leer watching Irina on television. "The Royal Whore returns." He laughed deeply, throwing his head back as he downed another shot of vodka. His hand slammed the glass down onto his desk and the TIME magazine naming Irina _Person of the Year._

His fingers grazing over her cheek in the photo as he continued to draw in the nicotine from his cigarette, "Woman of Strength." He read and scoffed, remembering her iron will when she first came to Kashmir and how he broke her. "My Little Vixen, how have you managed to fool the world?" He laughed tracing Irina's lips with his finger, "I know your weaknesses and just how to use them." He leered, inhaling one last draw from the cigarette before stubbing it out Irina's face.


	39. Chapter 39

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Mother of a Mother by Michael Giacchino from the ALIAS soundtrack, 519 Kids by MGMT.**_

* * *

THIRTY-EIGHT

o

The sound of metal clanking alerted Sark to the fact he had a new visitor, something that was few and far between and he only hoped, it wasn't Sydney Bristow again, come back for another round of abuse.

_***Mother of a Mother***_

His eyes widened in surprise when Irina came to stand before the bars of his cell, in her dark suit jacket and skirt, her hair pulled up in a loose French twist, arms folded over her chest in a defensive posture while her eyes studied him intensely.

Irina looked incredible and... alive. He'd only recently learned she had survived the Execution when Sydney had finished beating the shit out of him with her rage over the death of her friend. In the end, the two of them had reached some semblance of an understanding over Irina, Francie and Allison.

"Irina." Sark stood slowly from where he'd been sitting cross-legged on his small bunk. "You're alive." The corners of his mouth turned up in a small smile as he cautiously approached her, the relief of seeing her again flooded over his face. The last time he had seen her she was extremely pregnant and in her own glass prison cell, now she stood before him back to her former self, perhaps in better condition and free.

"Hello Julian." She smiled at him in an awkward grin, inspecting the boy she raised in the young man before her, making sure he was 'ok.' She knew that Sydney had worked him over rather good a few days ago when she approached him about her friend. His eyes were both black and a piece of tape over his nose signified she had broken his nose, his arm was in a sling from her dislocating it but other then that he looked to be in good condition. Her daughter had shown some restraint.

After her talk with him, and her Execution, Irina had been told Sark had become the model prisoner. Cooperating in every way possible with the CIA.

"How are you?" She asked truly concerned. She was responsible for his life in this business, and his imprisonment even if he'd been the one making the choices…she'd introduced him to the 'dark-side.'

"Well my accommodations are rather dull and boring," He looked around to the dark grey prison walls and bars in the federal prison he was being held at, used by the CIA. "But I suppose I could do worse." He looked at her with his piercing blue eyes. "The question is, Irina, how are you? I thought you were dead until a few days ago when your daughter informed me otherwise."

"No one told you?" Irina's eyes flashed with a hint of concern that all this time, he believed her to be dead.

"No, the CIA doesn't see fit to inform me of anything. I am just a lowly prisoner after all." He shrugged his eyebrows and felt a twinge of pain course over his face from the bruising. "They only told me about your Execution to taunt me."

"I'm sorry, Julian." Irina stepped closer to the bars, her dark eyes searching his baby blues. "I'm here because I refuse to give up on you." She admitted and saw the immediate surprise he tried to hide over the emotion and concern she was showing for him. "You are too young to have your entire life taken away from you; if I get a second chance at happiness, you deserve one as well. I told you I was not giving up on you."

Sark remained silent, studying her face and unsure of what to say. He'd never seen such passion coming out of this woman other then her quest for Rambaldi, especially not towards him. He'd respected her, feared her, looked up to her and adored her and when he learned that she had been executed he had even cried himself softly to sleep in the darkness of his cold cell.

"In case you hadn't noticed, Irina," He looked at her sarcastically, his emotions causing an inner turmoil. "Look at what side of the bars I'm on and according to my sentence, will be for the remainder of my life."

"Only if you choose to be." Irina straightened her stature, using her challenging tone. She was going to get through to this boy, cut through the walls he'd built long ago to protect himself. She'd taught him everything she could; gave him everything she was able to while he was growing up, except the one thing he really needed, the one thing he was craving: her love.

"What are you implying, Irina?" Sark furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"I bought your freedom." She shifted on her heels seeing the flicker of hope in his eyes.

"How?" Was the only word he could manage to say…

"I am now in a position to make certain requests, and demands."

"Ah yes," Sarks eyebrows rose with a smug grin, "The Princess said something about your real identity being revealed in order to save your life. So they know that you are 'The Romanov?" He paused while Irina nodded softly. "And you're using this new power and influence to release me from prison?"

"On certain conditions." Irina cocked her eyebrow with a piercing gaze and feral grin.

"And these condition would be?" Sark shifted uncomfortably with excitement and trepidation that reminded Irina of the little boy he used to be.

"You will help us find Sloane and Cuvee. I need someone who knows how my business is run and also how my enemies operate." Her mouth twitched in the corners seeing him studying her in the way she taught him to analyze someone who wants something from you.

"And?" He looked at her cautiously, grabbing the metal bar of his cage with his good hand, knowing from the look in her eyes and the cadence of her voice there was more.

"When we find them, and end this you will start new. Nowhere near this life, this business." Her dark eyes focused so intently on him he wasn't sure she was blinking. "That is non-negotiable or I will leave you in here." Her tone was deadly serious and Sark swallowed hard, but she was still holding something back.

"And what else must I do to earn my freedom?" He sighed, returning her intense gaze. Irina looking every bit the person who'd earned the name 'The Man.'

"There are certain truths about my life that you will learn to accept." Her tone was even and steady as relayed those truths.

"Such as?" Sark's interest was peaked, knowing he was about to learn something about her private life that she'd kept extremely guarded for his entire life.

"My family is the most important thing in the world to me. If anyone tries to harm someone I love and care for, I will show no mercy." She knew he was on pins and needles and could see the almost deflated sigh passing through his body he desperately trying to mask, at 'not' being a part of those she cared for so much. "That family includes you, Julian." She finally let the façade of 'The Man' slip away and smiled softly at him seeing his eyes widen. "I've raised since you were a little boy and I haven't always done what was best for you." She sighed standing straighter, lifting her chin, "When you came into my life I was not the person I am today. I'd lost everything and everyone I ever loved in the blink of an eye, the entire life I knew was gone. The only way I could survive, go on and live, was to close myself from every being hurt again, ever feeling again. I did the best I could with you, with what was left of me." She paused taking a breath, realizing she had never been this open with him before in her life and by the look on his face it terrified him.

Except for the one brief moment when he had visited her in the glass cell, Sark had never seen this side of her, he'd only known Irina as 'The Man.'

"My best was not enough because the one thing you needed more then anything else, I denied you or at least not shown you."

Sark looked away, taking a step back, averting his eyes as he felt tears stinging in them and was not about to cry in front of Irina. The last time he had cried in front of her was the day she had picked him up from that school when he was just a child. He'd almost cried that last time he saw her and she had told him she loved him.

Irina took slow breaths trying to control her own emotions as seeing she was 'right.' The one thing she'd been denying him all these years was the one thing he wanted more then anything. Her eyes found his blurry, forcing him to look at her before she would continue.

"Love, Julian. My love for you." Irina said softly in her motherly tone and Sark's eyes darted away as a tear rolled down his cheek and he ignored it as if it were invisible to both of them.

He felt himself getting choked up and unable to swallow properly and took in a shaky breath.

"You told me that I am the '_only mother you have ever known.' _And the same holds true for me with you, Julian." She took another step closer to the bars, "You are the only son I've ever known. I told you that day in my cell that I loved you and I meant that, Julian. I'm sorry that was incapable of showing you that love while you were growing up." She smiled and felt her own tears begin to blur her eyes. It had been far too long to admit that to him, especially seeing the little boy in his eyes now. "I'd like the chance to show you now." Irina watched him intensely trying to gauge his reaction, hoping that 'both' of them would get a second chance with each other and at life. She nodded to the guard at the end of the hallway and he approached the cell and unlocked it, sliding the door wide open and smiling softly at Irina before going back to his post. Irina ran her hand over the bars as she walked slowly to the opening, her eyes still searching. She walked a few steps into the cell and stopped about three feet in front of Sark, who was still looking at the floor. Irina's heart ached for the young man in front of her and in a split decision, made the choice and slowly took the remaining steps. Her arms carefully, bringing him to her, one hand to the back of his neck while the other pressed him to her between his shoulder blades.

Sark was tense and rigid at first but when Irina leaned her head against his and whispered,

"It's all right."

He felt the tension leave his body and closed his eyes, bringing his free arm up to embrace her.

Irina smiled as she wrapped her arms fully around him, holding him close for the first time in his entire life. She couldn't bear to do it when he was a child, the thought alone had brought up painful memories of Sydney and she couldn't allow herself to go there. There would be nights, just after she'd picked him up from the school, that she would stand in his doorway and watch him sleep. His little hands curled up next to his face, his wild curly hair, and the way he looked so small in the enormous bed. Some nights, she'd even brave sitting on the floor next to the bed, watching his little chest rise and fall with every breath and let herself cry silently for her own losses.

When they had stood together for a few minutes, Irina relinquished her hold on him and backed up, cupping his face softly with one hand and brushing away the tear tracks with her beautiful smile in place.

"So you agree to my terms?"

"Yes. I agree." Sark smiled softly and Irina leaned in and kissed him quickly on the cheek. "Thank you…for everything." He added, "I won't let you down this time. You have my promise."

"Then lets get you out of here." She smiled, and nodded towards the open cell door. "We have somewhere to be."

"Really? Where?" Sark's interest was peaked again as they walked briskly down the aisle.

"Home." Irina smiled brightly, seeing the electric shock look on Sark's face.

"What exactly do you mean by that, Irina?" He'd never heard her use the word before, having lived in so many places.

"You've been released into my custody, Julian, until you and I, both prove to this country that you are no longer a threat." She arched her eyebrow at him with a smile. "Once we get Sloane and Cuvee, you'll receive a Full Pardon."

"Oh." Sark was in shock, "And where exactly will we be calling 'home,' Irina?" His mind raced with the possibilities. She'd obviously had Bristow's child, so did that mean they had a 'home' somewhere or were they going back to Russia? He had no idea what the hell was going on, only that he was happy to be of prison after the better part of a year.

"For right now, here in Los Angeles." She handed the security team her clearance badge and winked at the stunned man behind the desk. He had been one of the guards that had kept watch over her while she was imprisoned, even shackling her a few times. Now she stood before him, the future Russian Tsar, with CIA security clearance, releasing a prisoner.

"In the home you shared with Jack Bristow?" Sark squinted upon seeing the son for the first time in almost a year when they walked outside into the parking lot.

"Yes." Irina smiled enigmatically as she pressed the button on her keychain to release the alarm on her Porsche.

"And Agent Bristow is alright with this?" Sark looked at her as if she were going crazy when he got into the passenger side of the car. He couldn't imagine Jack Bristow ever agreeing to such a thing but then again, he couldn't see Jack Bristow outside the CIA or SD-6 setting at all. Yes, he supposed somewhere in his mind he knew the man didn't live there, had a house but he couldn't 'see' it. Nor could he fathom Irina Derevko with Jack Bristow. He'd always been curious to see an interaction between the two, knowing very little about Irina's assignment or her life before she was 'The Man. Now…he was going to be living with them in their 'happy little home.' Things were about to get interesting.

"Yes. Jack and I are in agreement. He is trusting me and I am trusting you." She looked pointedly, before putting on her sunglasses, turning up the volume on the radio and backing up the car.

_***519 Kids***_

Sark knew what she had meant by that. She was putting her herself on the line for him and he'd better not mess it up.

"Put your seatbelt on." She scolded him, tearing out of the parking lot and sounding very much like a mother in that moment.

"And what about the Princess? I'm sure she can't be too happy about this?" He sighed, struggling with his seatbelt clip with the use of only one arm.

Irina immediately reached over and pushed in the buckle and Sark's eyes widened, watching her mesmerized as if he were seeing a completely different person: her openness, her caring, her choice of music…

"You killed her best friend, Julian," Irina weaved out of the frontage road and onto the freeway, "It's going to take some time. She's willing to work with us on this so don't do anything to goad her to fight with you. I know you're good at that." Her head turned briefly to look at him, before turning her attention back to the road and flying by several cars. "That also means, you have to stop calling her 'Princess.'"

"Well, that's a shame, I was rather fond of it." Sark quirked his eyebrow; enjoying the feel of wind in his hair as they drove west towards the setting sun.

"Do you still resent her? For being my daughter?" Irina asked quietly, barely loud enough to be heard over the car and the wind. Sark turned his head to stare at the woman beside him. Strands of hair were dancing around her face in the blowing wind, with one hand skillfully shifting gears as she waited patiently for a question he'd never thought he'd hear her ask. Hadn't realized, she knew 'why' he had called Sydney the 'Princess.'

"No, I don't suppose I do." He sighed, looking at the city flying by. He was quiet a moment before a wicked grin lit his face and he turned back to Irina. "How about 'Duchess?' She is one after all?"

Irina laughed softly, shaking her head. Sydney and Sark might as well have been brother and sister with their need to provoke one another.

"So can I ask something?" Sark squinted when they went around a mountain and he was blasted with the sunlight. Irina leaned over him and reached into her glove compartment, removing a pair of Jack's sunglasses handing them to him. "Thank you." He smiled awkwardly at her.

"What would you like to know?" Irina fingered a loosed hair behind her ear, zipping around a slow moving car in the fast lane, letting out a mix of Russian curses under her breath.

"How about we begin with…the child. I assume it's another girl with your reference to me in the cell?" He asked tentatively remembering her words 'only son' flashing through his head.

"Yes." Irina laughed at Sark's wording, "_It_'s another girl. Lena Alix Irina," She beamed with pride, "She was the first baby born in a CIA cell."

"Really? They didn't take you to a hospital?" The thought of a woman giving birth in a jail cell was hideous to him. "I can't believe Bristow would stand for that. Having his child born in a glass cell."

"We really didn't have a say in the matter. Jack was trying to get my pardon before her birth but we ran out of time. He almost didn't make it back from D,C. in time." She smirked, remembering that hectic day. "It had turned into a three ring circus rather quickly. Sydney on a mission, Jack was gone and so I was left with Agents Weiss, and Vaughn, Director Kendall and Marshall."

"That bumbling man from SD-6?" Sark cracked a smile remembering Marshall's introduction to him, '_Hi…welcome…don't kill me._' "We're being followed." Sark looked at the Black Mercedes following them since they left the prison.

"Yes. I know. They are part of my security detail," She answered nonchalantly, "And Marshall's such a sweetheart." Irina smiled widely picturing Marshall in St. Petersburg with his hat falling over his eyes.

"And you were pregnant with this child when we extracted you?" He sat somewhat stunned having gone over this a thousand times already in his head after seeing Irina so severely pregnant upon that their last meeting. He'd had a lot of time to go over those three and a half months in great detail, putting the pieces of the puzzle together. He just wanted to hear Irina confirm it. "You were pregnant when I electrocuted you in Germany?" He looked over at Irina and she nodded, remaining silent.

Knowing if that was true, she was also pregnant when Sydney shot her and on all the other missions they went on in that time frame. That fact had become very disturbing to him after seeing her enormous belly where it was obvious a baby had been growing and he could have ended that 'child's' life when he zapped her that day in the office.

_'Had she known then she was pregnant?_' He had to ask.

"Did you know you were pregnant then?" He asked cautiously.

"No." Irina ran her fingers over her ear again, pushing back the wild hair. "I didn't find out I was pregnant until I awoke two days after surgery almost four months later."

"Surgery?" Sark's eyebrows could be seen rising above the sunglasses.

"Sloane, Cuvee and your father," She looked at him sadly, a mixture of disappointment and anger tinting her words, "Had kidnapped Sydney, setting a trap for me in Moscow. To make a long story short, I was shot multiple times and stabbed."

"By whom? My father?" His own anger rising at the thought of just how far his father's betrayal of Irina went and his own; both father and son betraying her to Sloane.

"No, not your father." She sighed, shifting gears as they went down a hill. "Cuvee stabbed me through my hand," She held it up briefly for him to see, "And shot me in the chest, nicking an artery and collapsing a lung." Her fingers moved to separate the fabric of her button-down blouse and Sark saw the large incision from the open-heart surgery.

"Twice?" He asked, remembering she said 'multiple' and astounded she was still alive.

_'Damn him and his inquisitive mind!'_ Irina internally berated herself. She only had herself to blame for it, she had taught him how to pick up details and keep asking questions.

"No. Not twice. Jack shot me in the abdomen." She looked in the rearview mirror to make sure that her detail was keeping up. She had to keep them on their toes, test them every now and then.

Sark's mouth was hanging open in shock. He couldn't tell what part of that he was more astounded by that Bristow had shot her…in the abdomen while she as pregnant with his child, or that she obviously forgave him for it?

"I know what you're thinking." She smiled out of the corner of her mouth, "I was bleeding very badly from the stab wound and it was running onto the table and onto Sydney, who'd been paralyzed with a neurotoxin. Jack and I weren't exactly on the best of terms then. I had just betrayed him and Sydney for the second time with the extraction in Panama and with his worst enemy, Sloane. He had no idea what my motives were. He reacted to what he saw. Me, with a gun shooting in their direction as I escaped and Sydney lying on the floor covered in blood." She sighed again thinking about how horrible that day was. "He thought he was protecting our daughter. I can't fault him for that. And I didn't know I was pregnant until after my surgery, something he also, obviously didn't know when he fired. Thankfully, he just grazed me." Apparently, this baby was as strong, stubborn and lethal as her mother and sister, Sark thought. "Anymore questions?" She smiled softly at him.

"Several actually. Though I'm certain the great majority will be answered in due time." He winced slightly adjusting his arm, "Why don't you begin by telling me what is your part, exactly, in the Rambaldi Prophecy?"

Irina took a deep breath and broke into the long story of what had transpired with Sloane since Mexico City. When they pulled into the driveway a half hour later, Sark's eyes boggled from his head.

It was the home out of a typical American fairytale, white picket fence and all. Never in his life, would he have pictured either Irina Derevko or Jack Bristow living in such a place.

Irina smiled brightly as she turned off the car, "We're home!" She said in a chipper voice and laughed when she saw the look on Sark's face. Irina retrieved her purse and keys, before moving around the car to help Sark stand with his limited capabilities. "I took the liberty of buying you new clothes and they are waiting for you in the spare bedroom." She smiled, pushing her sunglasses to the top of her head as they walked up the steps.

"Hello Yuri." She greeted her large bodyguard in Russian as he opened the door for them.

"Your Highness." He bowed slightly with a smile and Sark cocked his eyebrow at him with fascination over his formal address of Irina.

Irina stepped inside, setting her purse on the table by the entry way as she made her way to the kitchen.

Sark hot on her heels, absorbing everything around him in the 'home' of Irina Derevko and Jack Bristow, cautiously looking for her former…or was it current, husband? Guessing from the new ring on her left hand something had happened between the two.

"He's not here." Irina smiled with her back to him as she retrieved her insulin from the refrigerator, knowing Sark was on alert for Jack. "He took the baby for a walk." She turned setting her supplies on the counter, smiling. "Father-daughter time."

Sark couldn't hide the surprise or complete stun that raced across his features with that thought.

"When should we expect them back?" He watched with wonder as Irina pricked her finger and tested her blood.

"Any minute actually." She smiled, reading her results and filling a syringe with the necessary amount of insulin.

"What are you doing?" His voice raised an octave as he watched her unbutton her jacket and lift her shirt, sliding the needle into her stomach and he saw the long scar that must have been inflicted by Bristow's shooting.

"Ah," She sighed, realizing he had no idea what happened in the Execution. "Lasting effects of '_coming back from the dead_." Her mouth quirked into a funny grin as she shrugged and threw the syringe into the orange plastic container on the counter.

"What do you mean?" Sark swallowed the lump in his throat as he stood perfectly still in the kitchen watching as she tucked her shirt back in.

"I was legally dead for over thirty minutes." She sighed, reaching for two glasses out of the cupboard and opening the refrigerator, retrieving a bottle of grape juice. "I sustained some permanent damage." She added quietly, trying to look at ease seeing his discomfort with this information. "I've lost all pancreatic function, no longer producing insulin. So I have to take injections as though I were a diabetic."

"Irina, I'm…" He was about to say 'sorry' when she held her hand up to stop him.

"You have nothing to be sorry for." She smiled softly, handing him a glass of juice as well, "I'm alive and that's all that matters."

Sark returned the soft smile, taking the juice gratefully after a year of nothing but stale water and rancid orange juice.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Irina?" Jack called from the other room, wondering where she was.

"In the kitchen." She replied in almost a sing-song voice with a sparkle in her eye, excited to see her husband and baby.

"Hey." He smiled when he came into the kitchen carrying Lena in the Baby-Bjorn against his chest and Sark's eyes popped out as Jack immediately captured Irina's face with his hands and kissed her. His eyes finally caught Sark's standing awkwardly on the other side of the kitchen and Jack's smile faded.

"Mr. Sark." Jack greeted him coolly. 'He really was just a kid...' Jack thought staring at him. "Seems you're going to be staying with us awhile." He spoke in a tone that could only be described as Jack Bristow.

"It would seem that way, yes, sir." Sark regarded Jack carefully, standing there looking stern and yet oddly soft with a tiny infant strapped to his chest.

"Irina has assured me that we can trust you." Jack's eyes intense as he looked over the young arrogant man in front of him.

"Yes, sir." Sark nodded, standing perfectly still as he had a stare down with Jack.

"Irina believes in you." Jack's eyes shifted to his wife's and she smiled at him then shifted her gaze back to Sark. "Don't disappoint her. Are we clear?"

"Yes, sir. Very clear." Sark's eyes locked onto Irina's. He wasn't going to let her down again.

"All right then." Jack nodded, they had reached an understanding.

Irina stepped in front of Jack, smiling brightly into his eyes trying not to laugh at the charade of 'Mr. Business' he'd just used on Julian as she undid the latch and lifted Lena out of the carrier and into her arms.

She peppered the baby's head, face and neck with kisses, inhaling her scent with her eyes closed and a smile, murmuring 'I love you and I missed you' in Russian softly in the baby's ear.

Sark had just witnessed first hand, for the first time, Irina Derevko as a loving mother and it took his breath away. She opened her eyes wearing the biggest smile he had ever seen and nuzzled her baby's face as she walked towards him with the child.

"Lena," She looked down softly into her baby's big bright eyes, "I'd like you to meet," She looked back up at Sark standing directly in front of her, "Your big brother. Julian."

Sark looked at her with mouth agape, unable to move or blink, overwhelmed with the enormous gesture that Irina really was thinking of him like a son.

Irina smiled warmly seeing the surprise in his face. She'd discussed her feelings about Julian with Jack and he had decided that if Sark was that important to her, he would try with the 'boy.'

He also knew, that if Sark felt like he was really a part of Irina's family, he'd be less likely to turn on her again or hurt her family. 'Big Brother' could work to their advantage and it never hurt to have yet another person looking after their baby.

Sark looked down to the baby in Irina's arms and felt something he never had before, a sense of belonging. He had betrayed Irina to her enemy, and now he stood in her kitchen, with her family and she was asking him to be a part of it.

Lena's features were easily recognizable as Irina's, including the arched eyebrow she was giving him now and he couldn't help but smile softly. He reached his finger up tentatively to her little hand and then stopped suddenly, coiling it back with hesitation. He'd never dealt with a baby a day in his life and hadn't really thought much about them until this moment…looking at the 'love' child of Irina Derevko and Jack Bristow.

"It's ok." Irina said softly, seeing his hesitation and urging him to start forming a new bond.

Sark extended his finger again and grazed the bottom of Lena's little palm, her tiny fingers immediately closing around his finger tightly and Sark smiled.

"She… is beautiful, Irina." He added shyly, caressing the back of Lena's soft hand with his thumb.

"Thank you." She smiled in return, seeing a new sparkle in his eye. "I'm sure you'd love to take a shower and get out of those clothes." She laughed, looking at his blue prison scrubs. "I'll show you to your room and get started on dinner while you're getting ready. If you are anything like me, you're starving for some 'real' food after that long in CIA custody." She winked at him, rolling her eyes at angle for Sark to look at Jack whose brow suddenly creased and Sark's grin told her she was right.

Sark was amazed at just how well Irina knew the enigma that was Jack Bristow.

"Yes. That food, if it can even be called such, was rather dreadful." He smiled smugly at Jack as he followed Irina out of the kitchen. They walked past several closed doors in the hallway and turned at the very end into a small 'L' shape.

One open door was at its very end and from the looks of it, Sydney Bristow's old room. Irina opened the door just before it and showed him inside the bright beautiful room.

"Your bathroom is there." She pointed to a door on the other side of the room. "Your clothes are all put away in the drawers and closet. I hope I did alright picking out things with your taste in mind."

She gave him a lopsided grin as she swayed with the baby, whose face was nuzzled into Irina's neck and falling asleep. A sight, Sark could still not get used to.

"I'm sure everything is wonderful." Sark said graciously. "Thank you again…Irina, for taking this chance on me."

"I know you won't let me down." She walked by him, brushing his cheek with a quick kiss before pulling the door closed behind them.

Sark stood stunned for a moment before moving towards the bathroom.

"Thank you, Jack." Irina breezed up behind him quietly, kissing the back of his neck with a smile as he chopped onions. She knew how hard it was for him to trust her on this, trust her feeling about Sark but despite of his doubts, he was going along with her on this. "It means a great deal to me that you're trusting me on this." She spoke softly, looking into his eyes when he had turned to face her.

"I know." He smiled softly, leaning in to kiss her. "If it means this much to you, it means that much to me." He laughed softly, kissing Lena's head softly in the crook of Irina's neck. "Somehow, our crazy family will make all of this work." He kissed her lips again, pulling away slowly, sucking slightly on her bottom lip. "I love you." He whispered in Russian, looking into her eyes with a smile, before turning quickly and setting back to the task at hand.

Irina pulled softly on his arm until her mouth met his ear in a soft kiss.

"I love you, Panama Jack." Her eyes sparkled with deviant laughter.

"Are Sydney and Vaughn joining us?" Jack asked with his back to her as she began pulling things out of the refrigerator.

"_Nooooo_." Irina extended the vowel softly, shaking her head with wide-eyes. "Julian's already freaked out enough being here, with you, with me!" She laughed, closing the door, "Jack I know you don't realize this, but he's _never_ seen me like this."

"How's this?" Jack turned to stare at her curiously.

"_This!_" She pointed to herself and the baby against her chest with a smile, "He's never seen 'me' the real 'me.' All he knows is 'The Man,' and that personality."

"How many of those do you have?" Jack asked with a smug look. "Let's see there was Laura, and Irina, 'The Man'… and '_Uumph_!" He caught the bag of carrots she had just winged with one hand into his gut.

"You be quiet!" She pointed at him with narrow eyebrows using a carrot, trying not to smile before she finally broke into a deep giggle.

"Well that explains an awful lot about Sark right there then." Jack raised his eyebrows, chuckling. "How confusing for a man to be raised by a woman who is known as 'The Man.' Not to mention that 'delightful' personality that goes along with it."

"Be quiet, Jack Bristow, or you're going to get carrot in your ear!" She waved the long orange vegetable at him like a sword, trying not to laugh.

"Hey, hey, hey!" He walked up behind her, rubbing up against her back with an onion in one hand and a knife in the other, whispering huskily into her ear, "I didn't say that 'delightful' personality was all bad." He kissed her ear with an open mouthed kiss that sent shivers down her spine as her breathing quickened. "I do seem to recall you using it rather affectively in that shower on Christmas. So commanding…I like it." He kissed her cheek again quickly seeing her cheeks flush and walked away smugly that he had flustered her into arousal.

"Noted." She flashed her seductive eyes and smile, using her deep, thick Russian voice on him watching him tense when she had the desired effect on him.

"You'd better watch it, Derevko, or I'll have to take you right here on the kitchen island." Jack tried shaking his head of those thoughts and stop the twitching in his groin.

"Oh yeah, we'll really freak Julian out then if he walks in on that!" She started laughing, making her body shake as she shook her head and tried concentrating on her carrots and not the pulsating swirl she felt building inside her.

"I just knew that little British twit was going to put a hamper on our love life." Jack grumbled and ferociously attacked the onion with his knife.

"Jack, he will do no such thing." She turned back to him, waggling her eyebrows. "We'll just have to get more creative."

"Is that a challenge?" He raised his eyebrows expectantly, liking the games they played dealing with wit and sex.

"It sure is." She licked then bit her lip, noticing his eyes darting to her mouth.

"Oo,h I got one." He whispered deeply after a moment, brushing against her as he picked up the bag of potatoes, "The laundry room. If I remember correctly, you always liked the 'spin cycle."

"Ooh yes! That is a good one." Irina shook her head with deviant laughter. "And we can always go take a 'drive,' in the car." She returned just as seductively, brushing against his arm grabbing a pan.

"Oh yeah, I definitely like that one." Jack bit his lip, feeling himself growing hard with just the thought of Irina taking control of his stick shift. "Ok, ok, ok…we have to stop now or I won't be held responsible for the shocked induced coma we're bound to give Sark." He breathed out through pursed lips sticking his head in the freezer to cool off.

"That's the wrong head, Sweetheart." Irina walked by and grabbed his groin, making his hips jerk.

"Stop it woman!" Jack yelled into the tubs of Ben & Jerry's, ice cubes and frozen meat.

Irina burst out laughing and that's the sound Sark heard when he emerged from his room. The sound of Irina's laughter filling the house; the entire thing felt like he had walked into another universe. He paused by the doorframe of Sydney's old room, hesitating momentarily about invading her space and then deciding that if the door was open, it was free game.

'_So this is 'Super Spy Sydney's' room.'_ He thought to himself as he walked cautiously around the room, taking it in. The dolls and high school trophies, the posters and books; the photos on her nightstand caught his eye and he carefully picked them up, gasping audibly when he looked at the life of the woman Irina had been talking about in the cell earlier in the day. The life and loves she had lost to leave her empty.

The photo of a beautiful young Irina rocking Sydney as a tiny baby was breathtaking and impossibly serene and he wondered briefly if his own mother had held him with such a loving embrace, probably not, she never wanted children.

Irina couldn't have been much younger then he was now when she had Sydney and he couldn't imagine what her assignment must have been like for her. She obviously loved the baby she held in her arms the smile in her sleep could not be a lie. He set the frame down carefully and looked at the other, a smile tugging at his closed lips seeing Sydney dressed as a 'Princess,' her little arms thrown tightly around…her mother. Sydney was probably about five or six years old he guessed from looking at it, and if doing his math correctly, would have been taken around the time Irina had been extracted.

He sighed, as his thumb traced over the photo of their smiling faces…the happiness and love between mother and child.

Setting the frame back on the table he realized that Sydney Bristow had gone to bed and woken up every morning of her childhood and adolescences to those photos. Trying to hold onto the memory of the mother she loved and believed dead. The photos and the few memories she sustained were all that she had of her mother for over two-decades. When Sydney was little and lying in this bed, holding these photos, probably talking to them if he knew Sydney, talking to her mother whom she believed was in heaven when in reality, she was on the other side of the world with him.

Sydney had her mother for six years and the love she shared with her had sustained her for twenty-one years. She'd been living off the love of the memories of her mother, while he'd been living with the reality in isolation. Sark heard another peel of laughter ring through the house from downstairs and he smiled softly wondering what their lives had been like before Irina was extracted, before Laura Bristow died.

He moved to the wall opposite of Sydney's desk and his breath caught at the face staring back at him. His mind instantly flashed to his lost love, 'Allison,' but he knew this was the real woman that face belonged to, Francie Calfo, Sydney's best friend. There were at least forty pictures of them together starting from about ten years of age through high school and into college. Ballet recitals and baseball games, beach parties and track meets, dress up parties and Halloween, camping in the woods and slumber parties, school dances and ski trips…the two seemed inseparable. She seemed like, the kind of friend he wanted to have…His heart felt heavy for the first time when thinking about Sydney's friend's death and his responsibility for it. He could have chosen someone else but when Sloane suggested the young woman, who was Sydney's friend, as a good candidate, Sark immediately jumped at the chance to hit Sydney where it hurt, out of some childish jealousy over Irina's love and affections. He hadn't thought of her friend as a person, merely a pawn in their game.

He realized now, that he had taken away the two women whom Sydney Bristow had loved the most in her lifetime, whether intentionally as he did with her friend Francie, or inadvertently by spending time with her mother Irina, that should have belonged to her. Somehow telling her, 'I'm sorry' just didn't seem quite adequate.

"Hi." Irina called to him softly from the door, having watched him from the doorway for quite sometime, seeing the rapid range of emotions flitting across his features as he looked at the pictures of Sydney and Francie, the best friend who's life he took. She saw the faint smiles, the sadness and remorse, and she wasn't quite sure but maybe understanding from Sydney's side of the fence.

"Irina, I was just…The door was open." He turned quickly, flustered with words for the first time in his life, feeling like he'd been caught.

"It's alright." Irina smiled softly, entering the room, barefoot, in jeans and a red shirt like something they'd wear in Thailand. Her hair had been released from its clip and hung long and loose in big waves down her back.

The baby was still asleep against her shoulder, as if Irina didn't want to put her down, afraid she would lose her and glancing back to the photos on Sydney's nightstand, he finally understood 'why.'

"See. I was right, Sydney is a 'Princess." He laughed softly, picking up the photo of she and Irina from Halloween.

Irina smiled sadly, at their faces in the photo.

"But you still can't call her that Julian." She raised her eyes to his, with her defiant eyebrow and a smile.

"I must admit, I am a bit in awe standing here, in this room," He paused looking around again, "Looking at the things from her past and realizing that there really was…is a life for Sydney Bristow 'outside' of being a Super Agent. That 'people'… not objects, are and have been, the source of her drive and motivation in life."

Irina stood quietly by the end of the bed for a moment, taken back.

"Yes," She said quietly, lips pressed to Lena's silky hair, smiling softly…proud of her daughter for never losing sight of what's important in life…the people in it. "Her friends…Vaughn…her father…perfect strangers." Irina chuckled softly as she nuzzled her Lena's little head.

Sark watched Irina's movements, her reaction, the way she held the baby in her arms, the loving nuzzles and caresses all second nature, doing it without thought. She had listed the people that had been Sydney's drive and motivation but she left out, perhaps, the most important one of all…herself.

"My assessment," Sark began, catching her eyes with his own as he took a few steps toward her and then sat beside her on the bed, "Is that you, Irina, must have been an incredible mother to Sydney for the six years you were together, for just the mere memory of you," He glanced over to the photos on the nightstand and Irina's eyes followed, "To carry her, drive her for the last twenty-one years of her life." His head slowly turned back to her face and saw a flicker of tears start to well in her eyes. The corners of his mouth turned into a slow smile and Irina leaned over and kissed his cheek, wrapping her free arm around him, overcome by the sentiment of the at statement. "Your children are very blessed to have you as their mother, Irina." He said quietly over her shoulder as his own arm came up to hold her there, absorbing her motherly embrace like a sponge, craving it now that he had a taste of what it felt 'd seen this woman kill people with her bare hands in the most vile of ways and yet now, he felt that the safest and most loving place in the world might just very well be in her motherly arms. '_Why couldn't his own mother have been like, Irina?'_ His own mother had never shown him any kind of affection when she was alive neither did his father. Maybe that is why he craved it; a mother's love and affection had always been the unknown until now; at twenty-three years old.

Jack had come quietly up the stairs to see where they were and what was taking them so long, dinner had been on the table for ten minutes. He had heard their voices coming from Sydney's old room and he had heard the last part of their conversation…with Irina naming the people that kept Sydney going in her life, and he too, immediately noted that she had left herself out. He was surprised that Sark had caught it too, and even more surprised by what he had told her, and his insight about it was astounding. He had opened Jack's eyes to a new way of thinking about it…he had always believed that it was Sydney's love for her mother that motivated her, kept her going…and that was true to an extent, but that love, that strong unbreakable bond had formed because of the incredible mother Irina had been to Sydney in those six years.

It was Irina's love for Sydney, not Sydney's love for Irina that had inspired that motivation. Perhaps Irina was right to believe in him. She saw a potential in this young man when no one else did and arming Sark with that knowledge, of her love and belief in him…he was beginning to see a new side to life.

Jack didn't want to feel like he was spying on them so he decided to head into the room as if he hadn't heard a thing. His eyes flashed wide in surprise when he found them sitting on Sydney's bed, hugging, both with tears in their eyes.

"Sorry to interrupt." Jack said softly, leaning against the doorway with his hand, not wanting to intrude more then he already had.

Sark had instantly released Irina and she had turned to face Jack with a soft smile, wiping her tears with the back of her hand.

"I just wanted to let you know that dinner is ready." He smiled softly in return. "Normally I'd say to 'hell with it' that's what the oven and microwaves are for, but Irina, you need to eat." He added softly, not wanting to sound like a nag but he loved the woman and wanted her healthy and safe.

"Ok." Irina smiled, touched by her husbands concern and the way he was handling having Sark in their home, in her life and his. She stood, adjusting Lena and dropped a soft kiss to Sark's forehead, tilting his chin to look at her, "Thank you." She smiled, affected by his words. He nodded with a small smile, moving to stand beside her.

Irina moved towards the door, full of emotion and extremely thankful, grabbed Jack by the front of the shirt, crashing her lips to his in an intense but rapid kiss, whispering _'I love you'_ in Russian to him before walking past leaving him breathless and off-balance leaning back against the door.

Sark's eyebrows were somewhere near his hairline caught off guard by Irina's move just as much as Jack. He finally broke into a sneaky smug smile when Jack's eyes darted to his, and Sark just shook his head, staring at the floor.

'_Yes, life at the Derevko/Bristow residence was certainly more entertaining then that dreadfully boring prison cell.'_


	40. Chapter 40

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): A Small Measure of Peace by Hans Zimmer from The Last Samurai Soundtrack.**_

* * *

FORTY

o

Sark had been sitting, tucked away in Jack Bristow's office for the better part of the day going over every piece of intel and information they'd acquired on Sloane, Zamir, and Cuvee over the last year he'd been in custody with Analysts and Agents bringing in stacks of folders, and boxes of Intel. So far, he hadn't seen anything that the CIA or Irina may have missed.

Irina had dropped by numerous times to check in with him and even Jack but Sydney had stayed away, only making brief eye contact before averting her eyes and moving out of his line of sight. He sighed, putting down another file of useless Intel and picked up the next in the box. His eyes narrowed in curiosity reading its label.

'_Derevko, Irina. Kashmir Imprisonment 1981-1983'_ The subtitle read, '_Face recognition copy 113_'

None of this made any sense. Obviously the file was mixed in by accident? Or miss label, he wouldn't put it past the CIA but his mind couldn't get past Irina's name and supposed imprisonment in Kashmir for 2 years.

In the seventeen years he'd known her, she'd never once mentioned being a prisoner anywhere and certainly not in Kashmir. He'd set up the nuclear plan with Cuvee in Kashmir, the KGBs' former gulag where the held and interrogated suspected traitors.

Sark's brain rewound and sped up again '_KGB, interrogated suspected traitors._' He couldn't swallow the massive dry lump in his throat. Irina imprisoned for treason? That couldn't be right. It had to be wrong, if it were true, why would she go back there for the nukes? None of this was making sense. He flipped open the file and retrieved the disk shrouded with fat, stamped red words reading '_Confidential,' 'Authorized Eyes Only,' _and_ 'Classified.'_

Wasn't everything in the CIA stamped with these ridiculous warnings? Now, he was only more determined to see what was on this disk. He slid the disk into DVD drive of Jack's computer and waited for it to boot up, sitting back against the comfy leather chair.

_***A Small Measure of Peace***_

The sounds of the old Soviet anthem filled the office and Sark scrambled to turn down the volume. He saw the earphones lying beside the monitor and plugged them in. The last thing he wanted was for someone to hear it and come in to see he was watching something he shouldn't. His heart stopped in his chest as they drug a beaten woman, he knew as Irina, up the aisle of the prison in Kashmir.

'_She had been a prisoner._' He could barely breathe as Gerard Cuvee circled her like a vulture, enjoying the show. None of this was making any sense. How could she work with a man whom had her imprisoned, tortured and beaten? He watched with rapt fascination, unable to tear his eyes away as he listened to her crimes being spat at her. Her crime had been she'd fallen in love with the enemy, had his child and then refused to return to Russia, killing Jack and returning with Sydney. Sark couldn't believe what he was hearing or seeing as they tortured Irina.

"She was pregnant!" He gasped quietly to no one but himself and felt tears stinging his eyes as he watched Cuvee beat the child inside her to death and then ordered his guards to keep kicking until he was sure that the 'bastard spawn' was gone. He felt the bile rising in his throat and the cotton taste in his mouth signaling he was about to vomit as he watched them host her up on to the cross, bleeding and unconscious as the prison went wild; her blood dripping onto the faces of Jack and Sydney. He kept burping into his mouth but refused to let himself vomit.

The blood-curdling scream from Irina as they prepared to rape her echoed non-stop in his ears as he watched one man after another ravage her limp body on her birthday. It seemed to go on forever and he didn't think he could take anymore. He was about to switch it off when it ended and it flashed to more torture sessions, more rape and then finally showing them dragging a very bloody and beaten unconscious Irina into solitary.

Sark couldn't stop the tears that had slipped from his eyes when he saw her emerge almost a year later looking like the walking dead. There was nothing left of her, not her body, not her feisty spirit, nothing in her eyes.

'_This is why she had nothing left inside of her to give to me._' He realized now, how the loving mother in Sydney's photos had become the emotionless 'Man' he knew. Irina had been scared to love him; scared to show him, because she couldn't bare to go through the pain of losing someone else she'd loved.

The debriefing with Cuvee and Kasanau had shown the Irina Derevko he grew up knowing. They'd broken her and taken everything she had. Rebuilt her into the machine they wanted, the machine that would become 'The Man.'

He watched in horror as they murdered her mother, a woman who had already survived one assassination in her life, for her daughters' refusal to leave her American family and return to Russia. Her mother's heartbreaking last words to Irina ringing in his ears as they threatened to kill Sydney next. The screen went black and the DVD ejected and Sark sat there with his face pale as he put the disk back into the file.

The overwhelming sense to vomit taking over and he flew from his seat and out the door, running to the bathroom as everyone stopped to stare until he disappeared behind the doors. Throwing open a stall door and retching violently into the toilet again and again until his stomach was completely empty. Irina was essentially his mother and he had worked with the man responsible for the atrocities he'd just seen against her. His own father, her cousin, had made a deal this man. Now he knew why, she wanted to hunt down Cuvee. There would be no mercy for the man if he found him first. Sark had been in such a hurry he hadn't noticed Marshall and Weiss were in the bathroom, too.

Weiss and Marshall had spent the last minute poking each other with their fingers having a screaming fight without words about who was going to ask Sark. It was finally decided by Rock, Paper, Scissors. Weiss had lost.

"You all right in there?" Weiss coughed, trying to not care but the man sounded like he'd heaved up his lungs.

"Fantastic." Sark replied sarcastically as he wiped the corners of his mouth with toilet paper and stood on wobbly legs.

"Oh you don't look so good." Marshall cringed, curling away from Sark who looked gray and green in color. "Do you have the flu or something?"

"Yes. Something." Sark was annoyed that he was heard retching in the CIA's bathroom.

"Oh well, don't be embarrassed about getting sick at work I mean, we, " Marshall waggled two fingers between himself and Weiss, looking at Sark in the mirror, "We both, and I guess Sydney too, retched our guts after watching the vid-_Hmmph_!" Weiss elbowed him hard, stopping any further reveal when he saw Sark's eyebrows raise with interest.

"Watching what, Marshall?" He turned to them adjusting his sling with a menacing stare that could make the little man sweat. He already knew what the man was going to say if not just the two of them, but also Sydney had gotten physically ill from watching it.

"Ahhhh, nothing." He finally spit out, holding his side in pain.

"It's Classified." Weiss tried to sound official, "For _Authorized Personal Only_."

"I see." Sark shifted his weight on his heels, "Tell me, does this video for APO having anything to do with Kashmir perhaps?" And there it was the immediate panic in both of their eyes.

"You…you, you know about that? Right? I mean why wouldn't you know about that if Irina raised you for the last two decades." Marshall spit out in rapid fire as felt himself getting queasy. "And then of course that last trip to Kashmir with the Bristows and the Empress and the nukes…which was all a ploy you were a part of," He pointed with narrowed eyebrows at Sark, "And planned but…if you knew about what happened there…why would you pick that place of all places? I mean talk about torture…that must have been so painful for her to be back there and with that sick bastard Cuvee? Why, why, why would you do that to her?" He saw Sark's face fall, "Unless you didn't know what happened to her there? Oh boy, I am going to shut up now."

"No, I didn't know about her imprisonment there until just recently." Sark lied by omission. "I would have never set it up for the nukes to be delivered there had I of known. Cuvee suggested it so I went along, with the suggestion."

"All this time you've known her and you just recently learned about it? That doesn't make any sense," Weiss crossed his arms, getting angry, "You were in prison until yesterday when Irina sprung you so how could you have learned recently?"

"Because," He replied forcefully, then pulled in his anger, "Agent Weiss, I just found the file and watched the horrifying films on a DVD in Jack Bristow's office. It was included in the Intel about Cuvee, Sloane, and Zamir…though it must have been a mistake. I doubt highly, Irina would let that be seen by just anyone." Sark fumed and then stilled thinking about the horrendous images fleeting through his mind.

"No wonder you're sick." Marshall gave him a lopsided smile. "She's kind of like your mom, huh?" Sark's eyes flashed to his with a pained look and wave of sadness.

"And Irina wasn't too happy when she found out that people had seen it," Weiss swallowed hard, remembering the day she finally lost it, beat the shit out of them and broke into sobs. "She had never seen the films, she didn't need to. She lived through the nightmare…but when she discovered that we'd seen it, she demanded to watch it. She locked herself in Jack's office, watched it and then went to the gym where she went crazy, like insanely crazy and beat the shit out of Mike, and I, Marshall by accident," He gave a nod to the small man beside him wearing a frown of sadness and nodding, "Stopping just short of killing us and then collapsed onto the floor in wracking sobs." He paused, watching Sark's reaction, having believed the man to be heartless, much like he had of Irina at first, now seeing a torrent of emotions running across his ashen face. "She hadn't addressed it for twenty years, just buried it inside her and on that day…it came exploding out. Jack, and Sydney and the baby just held her…it was just… heartbreaking. We went to the hospital," He shared a small smile with Sark at Irina's physical capabilities, "And they went home and talked. Irina told them what had happened to her off camera. Syd came over later a complete wreck." His eyes found Sark's, "What was on those films was only the beginning." He swallowed the bile he felt rising in his own throat. "The most vile…and wicked…and pure satanic acts were done to her by Cuvee himself…in his own private time with her." He didn't want or need to elaborate; he could see by Sark's reaction he knew what that probably entailed. "I know what you must be thinking…now multiply it by a thousand and you may get close to the horror of what happened to her off camera."

Sark's eyes widened and flushed with unshed tears, shocking Marshall and Weiss beyond belief.

"She has no idea we know about that, so please-" Weiss didn't want to ask this man for anything but he couldn't stand to see the look in Irina's eyes again if she knew that part of the secret was out as well.

"I won't say a word and I'll have to ask that you gentlemen afford me the same courtesy." Sark blinked back his tears and managed to keep them at bay, "She kept it from me for almost twenty years. I can't imagine she'd be thrilled to learn I found out because of a filing mistake on the part of the CIA. If Irina is ready to tell me, she will if not, I am not going to force her into a confrontation she isn't ready for. Especially not now, seeing her happier then I ever have in my life. She's asked me to help her find these men who violated her and I will do everything I can to make sure they die slow and painful deaths for what they have done to my mother." He'd been speaking without thinking and when it finally dawned on him what he had called her, it didn't feel right to disrespect the feeling by making it less then it was, so he'd said it. He thought of Irina Derevko as his mother and just proclaimed it to two CIA agents in a bathroom.

Weiss and Marshall didn't add any snarky comment to Sark's declaration for his 'mother.' They were in no position to judge the relationship of Sark and Irina.

"I think everyone here has that same opinion. That, those men, must die slow and painful deaths for what they've done to her. I think the line for those who want a crack at them is about a mile long now with Irina leading the way. She's been training like a Soviet Olympian in anticipation for this battle and we're all doing everything we can to catch these bastards."

"Hopefully, it will all be over before the Coronation so she can start a new life without worrying about them." Marshall smiled shyly.

"Coronation?" Sark looked at the nervous man again.

"You don't know?" Weiss laughed, not sure if Sark was kidding or not…Not sure if Sark knew how to kid.

"I haven't the faintest idea about what you're talking about." Sark looked at the expectantly.

"Your 'mother' is going to be crowned the official ruler of Imperial Russia in May." Weiss watched as Sark's face went pale again. "Irina didn't tell you that you're going to be an official Grand Duke of Imperial Russia?"

"No, she forgot to mention that." Sark shook his head, as a small smile crept across his features. "Small oversight on her part I'm sure, as I've only been out of custody for 24hours now." His smile faded again and his eyes moved the small gray tiles of the floor. "I don't know how I am going to be able to look at her the same way again."

"You won't." Weiss answered softy, speaking from his own experience. "None of us do. We finally saw the person behind the name and realized that what we all saw, is part of what made her who she is." He paused when Sark refused to look up, concentrating intensely on the floor as he listened. "She became more then just Irina Derevko, the enemy…We were able to see the loving wife…and mother inside her. The person inside that Teflon shell." He smiled softly thinking about Irina and saw the corners of Sark's mouth twitching to smile as well. "That was only amplified when we saw her pregnant and give birth…When we all watched her die and fight her way back to life…you can't look at someone the same way again after you've witnessed these things." Weiss unfolded his arms and shoved his hands into his pockets, shifting his weight. "The more time we spend with her... the more we love her. It can't be helped." His smile widened when Sark's eyes finally lifted and met his with a small smile. "You'll see, you're living with them after all."

"I've already begun to see this side of Irina. It's just conflicting because, she is the same person I've always known and yet she isn't." Sark added softly, thinking about the woman he'd seen the last two days.

"I'd probably say that Sydney would be the best one to talk to about that. She went from knowing her mother as Laura Bristow the loving English Professor to Irina Derevko KGB spy and 'the Man' before finally coming back to seeing Irina as the mother she's always loved with just more to her. But considering your history with her," Weiss's eyes narrowed again in defense of his friend and the pain caused by Sark when he killed Francie, "I don't think that'd be a good idea. Perhaps Jack?"

"No, that will be quite unnecessary. I don't need to talk to anyone about it." Sark stood up straight, looking into the mirror and adjusting his tie trying to push down any emotion he was feeling.

"Ok." Weiss shrugged, seeing the deflection for what it was.

The door to the bathroom opened and they all jumped slightly.

"What are you guys having a Girl Scout meeting in here?" Vaughn looked at the three in front of him, sizing up Sark and Sydney's repercussions, having last seen the man face to face when they arrested him in Sweden.

"Not without our leader, Agent Vaughn, though I'd say you lose your merit badge for lavatory humor." Sark looked at with his steely blue eyes replying in an even tone that unnerved Vaughn.

"You're looking a little pale, Sark; life on the outside proving to be too much for you?" Vaughn returned the intense gaze.

"Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure." Sark responded sarcastically and stepped around Vaughn, exiting the door. He turned the corner heading back for the privacy of Jack's office when he ran smack into the one person he wanted to avoid.

"Julian," Irina's face, flashed with concern, "You look pale, are you feeling alright? Jack said he saw you tear out of his office and into the bathroom."

"Fine. I think I may have a touch of the flu is all." He avoided looking into her eyes at all cost, the floor, the wall, her earrings… anything but into those dark eyes.

Irina's eyes narrowed. Sark was not one to get sick, they were alike in that way. She could count on one hand the times he had fallen ill in his twenty-three years of life.

"We're getting ready to leave. Jack and I are bringing home some things to go over later tonight. We'll leave as soon as he's finished getting the files from his office."

Sark's eyes darted to hers' briefly in a moment of panic before quickly looking away. Irina's file was still sitting on Jack's desk. She studied him carefully, he was avoiding eye contact and was fidgeting, his complexion wasn't getting any better.

Sark had never been 'more happy' to wear the dark hood that covered his head as they left the CIA complex. Sure, he couldn't see anything but at least they couldn't see him. He knew Irina was studying his behavior intently.

* * *

When they got 'home' Sark excused himself to his room the moment they were in the door and hadn't come down since.

"Jack, something happened today." Irina twirled her ring on her finger with her thumb as they sat on the couch, her eyes toward the stairs. "His behavior is just…odd."

"My Love…Sark is odd." Jack deadpanned seriously before cracking a smile when she rolled her eyes. "He wasn't feeling well, I'm sure that's what is causing this peculiar behavior."

"You know something." Irina leaned forward, studying him carefully; his eyebrow had twitched when he said that. A telltale sign he was either lying or wasn't telling her all he new.

"Irina, I don't know anything more then you." He put down the file he was reading. Jack did of course but he wasn't certain.

"I'm going to go talk to him." Irina made a move to stand but Jack held her arm.

"I'll go." Jack stood watching her surprise,"If he's retching his guts out again, the last thing the man is going to want is you standing 'Mother-Hen' like over him." He smiled and kissed her quickly before making his exit, leaving Irina sitting in stunned silence. Something was definitely going on.

Sark had been sitting on the edge of the bed, looking out the window for quite sometime, completely lost in thought when he heard the knocking on his door.

He sat up straight, preparing himself for Irina and called out, "Come in." He was certainly surprised to see Jack Bristow standing before him in jeans and a lightweight, dark grey sweater. He had imagined the only clothes the man wore were suits.

His anxiety came rushing back when he watched Jack close the door and lean against it, blocking any exit. Jack's intense gaze as unsettling as Irina's. The look on his face told him he 'knew' what Sark had been watching in his office.

Jack regarded Sark carefully, watching every eye movement, every twitch, every breath trying to decide what Sark knew and didn't about Kashmir.

"You didn't know did you."

It was a rhetorical question and Sark knew it. He remained silent and turned his head back to gaze out the window.

Jack couldn't help but feel a strange twinge of compassion for the blue-eyed blonde sitting on the bed. He looked absolutely devastated and guilty. For that he wasn't sure why.

"Irina never told you anything about that time in her life, did she?" Jack remained standing by the door, speaking in soft tones. Sark dipped his head to stare at the hand in his sling before looking back out the window at the hummingbirds eating out of a small feeder. Jack had his answer. "She didn't tell any of us." Jack sighed, running his hand over his face as if trying to wash away the images assaulting his brain. "We found the footage of what happened to her just after Moscow in a KGB file that Sydney stole from Cuvee's office on your Intel. I didn't even know she went to prison for treason until we went to Kashmir; to steal the guidance chips."

Sark's head turned back to stare at Jack with rapt attention, waiting for him to explain.

"I thought she'd been an officer there. I wasn't going to let her out of my sight. I kept pushing her and finally her wall began to crack. She admitted to Sydney and I standing inside that prison," He paused, remembering the look on Irina's face, the unshed tears. "That she wasn't an officer but a prisoner; that's how she knew the landmine locations, the sewer tunnel access; because she had tried to escape from there once before. I didn't know if she was lying or not, but the look on her face…the unshed tears…she was losing control. I knew for that to happen, she was telling the truth about being a prisoner."

Sark felt like he'd been punched in the gut. '_Why? Why? Why? Had he listened to Cuvee and made Irina go back there?'_

Jack saw the flash of pain and remembered Sark's part in the Kashmir mission.

"You didn't even know she was a prisoner there, did you?"

Sark was still a moment, looking back out the window before shaking his head 'no,' he hadn't known.

"I knew nothing of that." He felt the tears welling in his eyes and he kept his focus on the green and red hummingbird, flapping its wings at the speed in which his heart was beating. "I never would have arranged for the Rambaldi artifact to be opened there had I known…known what happened to her there." He swallowed the dry lump in his throat with great effort. "I know you probably don't want to hear this but Irina is the closest thing to a mother, I've ever known." He paused, thinking about it, staring at the small bird circle the plastic feeder.

Sark suddenly seemed so young, so small to Jack, sitting there on the edge of the bed.

"What that hideous monster did to her…I can't stop the images from racing in my mind. I keep hearing her screams." Sark's voice caught and he sucked in a sharp breath, furiously blinking back tears. "It makes me sick. I don't know how I can face her again, especially after I'm the one responsible for sending her back there."

Jack saw the fragileness of a little boy in the man in front of him and he was reminded of Sydney. How she had reacted to seeing what had happened to Irina, to her mother. The guilt Sydney felt over blackmailing her into going back to Kashmir.

"Sydney," Jack began thinking of what to say to him, "Felt the same way you do now after we watched those films, saw what had happened to Irina there. She felt guilty." Jack paused watching Sark's reflection in the glass, "Because she had been the one that blackmailed Irina into going back there. Her guilt was unfounded as is yours." He saw the shiny tear that fell from Sark's eye, "Neither of you knew what had happened to Irina in that hell-hole. She doesn't blame Sydney and she doesn't blame you. She's downstairs worried about you right now. She knows something is not right."

"I just don't know what to say to her. I don't know how I can look at her and not keep seeing what happened to her." Sark replied barely above a whisper. "How do you do it? How does Sydney?"

"Because when we look at her, into those big brown eyes, we see that she is more then the violent acts committed against her." Jack sighed and refolded his arms. "They are a part of what made Irina who she is now. She is still the same woman, that she was before you saw those files. You've just gained some insight and understanding into 'how' she became who she is."

Sark remained quiet and watched as the tiny bird flew away thinking about what Jack had said.

"Her imprisonment is common knowledge now, no details…just the facts. It's been all over the press with Irina's recent celebrity." Jack realized that Sark new nothing of this because he'd been in prison. He also realized, that the young man knew nothing about Irina's life before her release from Kashmir. Right now, the world knew more about her than Julian Sark. "We've kept a copy of all the magazines about Irina's life before you knew her." Jack relaxed his arms and turned, stopping with his hand on the door. "I'll bring them in for you to read. Give you a little more insight into her life."

"Thank you." Sark said softly, turning to meet his eyes, "Are you going to tell Irina that I saw the files?"He swallowed nervously as Jack looked him over.

"No." Jack replied sharply in a very fatherly tone, "You are." Seeing Sark's flash of anger and panic he added, "If she finds out you saw them, and didn't tell her. She will get upset. She doesn't want people to coddle her. You know Irina," He smiled softly, "She demands honesty."

Sark smiled softly and chuckled realizing that was certainly true.

"But if she asks me out-right I'm not going to lie to her," Jack looked at him with serious eyes, "Tell her the truth and don't be afraid of it. Irina's strong. She won't shatter into a million pieces." Jack's tone was soft and honest. "I'll get the magazines for you."

"Jack…" Sark called out suddenly and Jack turned to face him, "I'm going to do everything I can to help find Gerard Cuvee… and make him suffer."

Jack nodded in acknowledgement, and agreement before he opened the door and left.

Jack found Irina in the kitchen a few minutes later pouring a cup of tea with a look of concentration on her face.

"Is he ok?"Her eyes darted to his immediately. Motherly worry easily transferring to Sark now.

"Yes. He's ok. A little overwhelmed I think." Jack found her face gently with his hands and tilted it up, dropping a soft kiss to her lips. "He's upstairs right now, lying down and reading all of the magazines, catching up with the rest of the world." He smiled softly, wrapping his arms around her. Needing to hold her, feel her close after being reminded of what she'd gone through and survived. "What do you want to do for dinner?" Jack asked quickly, hoping to direct her away from more questions about Sark.

"I made Stroganoff while you were upstairs with Julian," Her eyes penetrated his searching, "You were up there a long time. What did you talk about?"

_'Damn! This woman and her ability to stay on track when she wants something.'_

"You. What else would we have to talk about?" Jack smiled, kissing her again, hoping to make her lose that serious face.

"You're trying to steal my move." Irina knew he was holding back and it was driving her crazy.

"What?" Jack laughed looking at her strangely, having no idea what she was talking about.

"The kiss and deflect." She raised her eyebrows in her lecturing tone, challenging him to argue and Jack broke into a laugh, realizing she was right. "What about me? Jack, what are you keeping from me?" Her tone was tinged with hurt and the look in her eyes was killing Jack.

Lying and keeping secrets was no-way to start over, even with the best of intentions. He sighed, and his hands went to her hips lifting her suddenly and setting her on the island counter, snuggling himself between her legs and wrapping his arms around her waist.

Irina's heart began beating rapidly, and her breathing picked up with the unease she felt come over her. The look in Jack's eyes and his reluctance to talk; the way he just picked her up and put her on the counter. The way he was holding her, was the same thing he used to do when they were married and he was about to tell her something she didn't want to hear; usually that he was leaving for months on dangerous missions.

Jack didn't speak, just stared at the scar from her heart surgery exposed at her collar. He had never brought up Kashmir to her after the day she told them everything. They'd talked about it, but only when she approached the subject.

Leaving it up to Irina to set her own pace in this healing process, giving her back control over the situation where it had been taken from her in Kashmir. By letting her talk about what happened to her when 'she' wanted to, it was slowly empowering Irina by letting her control it, instead of it controlling her. Jack didn't want to cause her to backslide by blindsiding her bringing it up; taking the control away from her again.

Irina had a raw nagging feeling in her stomach, seeing his reluctance. She tipped his face to hers with her fingers under his chin and when her dark orbs held his she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, bringing him closer.

"Jack…just tell me. Please?" Her begging for honesty.

"Irina," He sighed, looking into her dark eyes knowing they were going to be filling with tears shortly, "He saw the Kashmir footage today." He watched her small sharp intake of breath and then as he knew they would the tears started to pool.

"Why?" She asked barely above a whispered, desperation in her voice. '_Well that explained a lot. Why he was sick, why he was pale, why he wouldn't look at her…'_

"It was unintentional. He found the file when he was going through the Intel on Cuvee." He spoke softly as he wrapped his arms around her hips, looking up into those big brown eyes. "He just wasn't prepared for it. There is no way to prepare for something like that." His hands holding her tightly, "His reaction was the same as Sydney's and he feels guilty for making you go back there with the opening of the Rambaldi artifact."

"He didn't know." Her voice answered in the same whisper as she hiccupped for breath and the tears spilt over.

"I know," His hand ran over the side of her head, smoothing her hair. "I told him that but he loves you, Irina…and it hurts to find out someone you love was in pain and you can't do anything about it now. "

Irina inhaled a shaky breath, wiping the tears with the back of her hand.

"Is he ok?" She asked.

Jack smiled softly, _'always concerned for others before herself.'_

"Yeah, he'll be ok It's just a lot to process and absorb." He used his thumb to wipe another fallen tear, "Sydney and I didn't sleep at all that night, the day we watched them. We sat on the porch swing and talked until the sun came up."

"You did?" She hiccupped, generally surprised.

"Yeah we did." He smiled and kissed her palm. "Sydney was determined to remember the last thing you said to her was before your extraction. She went straight for Psych and had them do memory regression." He watched Irina's eyes widen as she sniffled. "She remembered…she remembered everything. The day your handler came to the house and you sent her upstairs…she remembered your 'Goodbye,' and that you loved her with everything you had."

Irina's tears started flowing again and Jack's eyes got blurry.

"To the moon and back more then the stars in the heavens and the grains of sand on Earth…"

"Forever and always." Irina finished in a whisper, thinking about that day.

"Yes." Jack blinked back his tears, "We sat out there, on our swing and Sydney and I finally realized 'Laura was always Irina, and Irina was always Laura.' Sydney realized, that you were always her mother." He added softly, wiping her steady stream of tears.

Irina reached forward and pulled Jack to her, wrapping her arms around him and allowed herself to cry softly into his neck, something she hadn't done in awhile; Jack's arms wrapped securely around her back, holding her to him.

Sark had emerged from his room and walked slowly down the hall when he heard the sound of soft crying coming from downstairs.

As he neared the top of the staircase, he could see into the kitchen. Irina was sitting on the kitchen island and Jack was standing in front of her, their arms wrapped around each other and Irina was crying softly into Jack's neck, her face turned away from Sark in his profile view of them through the doorway.

'_She knew. Jack must have told her.' _Sark felt tears coming to his eyes that he had made her cry by learning the truth. He'd never seen her cry, ever. The first day he ever saw her with tears was that day when she was pregnant and they were both CIA prisoners. He'd seen the tears again yesterday but he'd never seen her cry. He couldn't bare the thought and he couldn't bare the sight…his own tears began to fall and he began walking quietly back to his room. He heard a soft squeaking noise as he walked past Jack and Irina's bedroom door. It was open so he looked inside, spotting the bassinet and the baby inside. He cautiously walked over to stand beside it and looked down at the sleeping baby who was moving around in her dreams.

She looked so small, so perfect, so beautiful and his heart clenched as images of Cuvee beating the baby out of Irina flashed through his mind. He reached out hesitantly and brushed the backs of his fingers over her dark hair, amazed at how soft it was. A small smile coming to his face before the frown as he thought about the baby Irina lost…the missing Bristow child. Lena had dropped her pacifier and was nuzzling for it with her eyes closed. Sark saw her intent and picked it up, pressed it lightly to her lips and she opened and started sucking on it immediately. The bounce in the little plastic appeaser as her tongue sucked feverishly amusing to Sark and bringing another smile to his face before he left the room.

* * *

Irina took a deep breath standing in front of the closed door in front of her ten minutes later. She raised her fist and rapt softly on the door with her knuckles.

Sark was lying back against the headboard on his bed, reading the details of the Bristows' last day together in Newsweek when he heard the soft knocking.

Knocking too soft to be Jack's and he braced himself for Irina.

"Come in." He called softly, swallowing hard when Irina appeared in front of him.

The only evidence she'd been crying, the slightly puffy eyes. She was wearing jeans and white baseball undershirt with blue 3/4 length sleeves; attire Sark was still not used to seeing on her. It was so…_domestic_. Real people wore these kinds of clothes. Not leaders of international syndicates.

"Julian." She smiled softly and closed the door then walking to the side of the bed he was closest to and sat on its edge, tucking one leg under the other and putting her hair behind her ear before she looked up at him. "Jack told me you saw the Kashmir files today." She remained composed, biting her lip as she waited for his response.

He slowly set the magazine down in his lap, closing it, he nodded, still unable to look her in the eye.

"Please don't be mad at Jack, he didn't want to tell me. I made him." She smiled and let out a small breath of a chuckle, amused at her persuasiveness.

He remained silent, staring at her picture on the magazine in front of him. The same age, the same face, the same year that she had been imprisoned in Kashmir.

"I'm not upset with you, Julian and I don't blame you at all…for choosing Kashmir as the site for the nuke drop. You didn't know." She reached forward and took his hand, squeezing his fingers in her own. When he still wouldn't look at her she raised his chin with her other hand. "It's ok." She gave him a small smile as her brown eyes pierced his blue and saw them pooling.

"Irina, I'm…sorry." He finally choked out.

"Don't be." She smiled warmly, "You have nothing to be sorry for."

"I can see now why you couldn't…Why you weren't able to…show love for anyone after that. Couldn't stand to lose anyone you loved again." Sark squeezed her soft fingers in return and Irina's eyes broke contact as she inhaled sharply for a long time, trying to control her emotions. "You'd lost so much. Your mother… your husband…your daughter…your baby-"

Irina turned her head at a sharp angle when he mentioned the baby, looking out the window and breathing quickly as fresh tears sprung to her eyes.

Sark flinched seeing he was making her cry again, not what he intended.

"Irina, I'm sorry. " Irina shook her head 'no' softly it wasn't his fault her emotions were on overload at the moment. "It's ok." She croaked out turning back to him, with a small smile and blurry eyes. "Are you ok?" She had won the battle with the tears and they were dissipating.

Sark finally smiled, seeing his 'Irina' in her eyes, that enchanting sparkle, her resilience and ability to bounce back quickly. He leaned forward and pulled her to him with his good arm. Irina smiled as she wrapped her arms around him. They didn't say anything, they didn't need to; they just held each other in silence for a moment.

"Are you hungry?" Irina asked smiling when she pulled back, remaining where she sat as her eyes glanced over the multiple magazines her face adorned spread over the bed.

"I supposed I could eat." He smiled back, following her eyes to the magazines. "You have quite the fascinating life, Irina." He laughed softly seeing her eyebrows rise and shrug. "You are getting remarried?" He asked with his own raised eyebrows picking up a magazine that had mentioned that detail.

"Yes," Irina laughed softly. "This weekend actually. I hope you don't mind spending a few days Santa Barbara." She turned her smile to his face, light dancing in her eyes.


	41. Chapter 41

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Santa Barbara by Benise, Time To Say Goodbye by Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman, Beautiful Day by U2, At Last by Etta James, Power of Love by Celine Dion, Ice Cream by Sarah McLachlan**_

* * *

FORTY-ONE

o

"Ahhhh!" Sydney squealed with delight, wrapping her arms around her mother's shoulders from behind as they both stood in front of the massive mirror in their hotel suite in Santa Barbara. "You're getting married tomorrow!" She felt tears stinging her eyes with happiness.

"Don't start crying again, Sydney, or I will, too and then we'll both ruin our make-up." Irina laughed, wrapping her own arms over her daughters. "You are so beautiful, my Sweet Girl." Irina smiled proudly as she looked at their reflection in the mirror. They were both wearing dresses made from the same fabric for just this occasion.

Everyone was gathered together in the beautiful city for the weekend to attend the wedding of Jack and Irina. Tonight they were attending a special dinner with their friends and family at the Bacara Resort. It was also an opportunity for the press to get some photos as the actual wedding ceremony was going to be closed off, airspace included thanks to President Bush, who would also be in attendance along with the Putins.

Sydney leaned forward and kissed her mother's temple with a smile, "I love you Mom." She couldn't stop the tears from pooling in her eyes. "To the moon and back, more the stars in the heavens and the sands on Earth…forever and always."

"Forever and always." Irina repeated locking her eyes with her daughters in the mirror before turning in her arms and holding her tightly. "I love you, Sweetheart."

They heard a soft knocking and reluctantly broke their embrace, "Come in." Irina called softly with a smile. Katya and Sophia entered looking gorgeous in dresses made of the exact same material as that of Irina and Sydney.

All of them different in design to fit the style of the woman wearing it and still presenting a united front.

"I'm so happy you're both here!" Irina took two strides forward, smiling as she pulled both of them into her arms.

"Well I missed the first wedding, I'll be damned if I'm missing the second!" Katya laughed with tears in her eyes. "I'm so happy for you Rina." She kissed her sisters' cheek.

"Thank you both for being here." Irina smiled in return, cupping Sophia's face and kissing her forehead and then cheeks, repeating the move with Katya and holding their hands.

"I came to tell you the limos are here." Katya smiled, extending her hand to Sydney who took it, and the four of them stood in a temporary circle holding hands. "The Derevko women together again." She smiled brightly as they all batted tears. "We will not cry!" She scolded as she blinked her tears back furiously smiling.

"Has everyone arrived?" Irina walked to the nightstand, grabbing tissues for them all to dab their eyes with.

"Marshall and his lovely friend Carrie just arrived as well as Mr. Weiss." Katya smiled brightly, and Sophia raised her eyebrows with approval.

"And Vaughn?" Sydney, dabbed at her eyes trying to keep her make-up from smearing. "Are they back from the airport?"

Vaughn had gone to pick up his father…and his mother, at the Santa Barbara airport an hour or so ago.

"Not yet." Katya smiled softly, cocking her head to the side as she watched her sister and niece, they were so alike.

Sydney scooped up Lena from the center of the bed, wearing a dress like the rest of the women in her family and looking absolutely beautiful.

"Let's go." She smiled, cradling her sister in her arms as she slept.

_***Santa Barbara***_

The five of them emerged laughing from behind the walk way lined with beautiful Bougainvillea bushes in full bloom with their brilliant pink blossoms, the air smelling of Jasmine.

Vaughn and his parents had arrived and joined everyone else standing in the grass near the beach waiting for the women.

"Rina!" Mikhail shouted with a smile when he saw her for the first time since Christmas. He started walking quickly towards her, as fast as his leg would allow and Irina's face lit into a brilliant smile, closing the distance between them quickly.

Mikhail swept her up into his arms with a smile and hug, laughing as he picked her up and twirled her around, overjoyed for his friend and her happiness.

The others in the group, including Vaughn's mother stood watching the two with happy fascination at their strong bond and connection.

"Imperial Russia!" He kept chanting into her ear, before setting her on her feet again. "Your mother would be so proud!" He laughed, cupping her face softly. "I'm so happy for you…" He leaned over and kissed her cheek.

"Thank you." She whispered with her bright eyes, clasping his hand in her own.

"Rina," His smiled widened as he turned back to face the crowd, "I want to introduce you to someone…I've been waiting so long for this." His eyes locked onto his beautiful wife, "Bella…" He addressed her softly as he and Irina walked towards the beautiful blonde slowly, her eyes already locked with Irina's as he took her hand in his other, "This is my Rina…and Rina," He smiled warmly at her, "This is my Bella…"

Irina stood looking at the gorgeous woman before her with a smile before closing the distance quickly and wrapping her arms around her."I've been waiting so long to meet you." Irina held the woman tightly, so happy for her friend and the woman in her arms.

They were finding their way back to one another just as she and Jack had.

"As have I." Bella smiled feeling tears stinging her eyes, as she pulled away but kept the contact as she held onto Irina's forearms.

"I want to thank you, for saving Mikhail's life…I know what you did, what you sacrificed for his freedom."

"It was worth it, for this moment." Irina smiled in her enchanting way, looking from Bella to Mikhail and then to their family surrounding them. "We're all together again." Irina cupped Bella's face and kissed both cheeks. Now," She linked her arm with the beautiful French woman's, "My daughter tells me that you and I, are alike in a many ways…"

"Really?" Bella laughed softly, smiling at her husband as they all began walking towards the waiting cars. "Then we should make great friends."

"And fabulous grandmothers!" Irina laughed, catching Jack's lips with a quick kiss as he helped them into the car.

They stood for the press for the better part of a half hour before entering the exquisite resort on the cliff over looking the sea. The evening was beautiful with the setting sun lighting the sky on fire with a brilliant orange hue and a cool breeze swept up from the sea. Towards the end of the meal, Sophia leapt from her seat when tall, dark and handsome man entered into the ballroom.

"Papa!" She ran toward her father excitedly as everyone else sat there stunned, save Katya who had an immense glow and look of seduction in her eyes staring her husband.

The man picked up his daughter, holding her tightly, and kissing her cheeks when he set her down. "My beautiful Sophia." He smiled into her face, "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too Papa." She turned into his palm placing a kiss in it center.

They walked slowly toward everyone else with Sophia practically dragging him behind her, smile plastered to her face as they came to stand before her mother, still seated next to Irina at the table.

"Hello Mio Amore," He flashed Katya is own seductive grin, with his captivating Italian accent, reaching for her hand and kissing her knuckles.

"Marcelo…" She cocked her head with a smile, obviously smitten with this man as the others watched with rapt fascination, having never heard of Katya speak of her husband and father of her children. He leaned over and softly kissed her lips with a smile.

"Marcelo…" She smiled, turning her attention from him to Irina, "I would like you to meet my sister…Irina. Irina, my husband Dr. Marcello Bernelli."

"Charmed…It is a pleasure to finally meet you…" He took hold of Irina's hand, kissing it softly, and placing a kiss on both of her cheeks.

"Katya speaks very fondly of you. She missed you a great deal…when you were gone." His eyes held a sympathetic gaze between the sisters, remembering the nights he'd come home from the hospital to find his wife crying into her pillow for her lost sister. His gaze fell around the room at the incredible group gathered.

"As I missed her." Irina sought out her sister's hand. "It is a great pleasure for me meet you as well Marcelo. I've heard many wonderful things about you. Thank you for coming. I know it's difficult for you to get away from the hospital as the Chief of Staff."

"We are family, Irina, everything else, can wait. Congratulations on both your wedding and your upcoming Coronation." He kissed her cheeks again, flushing red with her enchanting beauty.

"Thank you." She returned the smile seeing how this man could captivate her sister with charm. She also knew just how much Katya had missed him while he was working so many hours."My apologies for not being able to make it to Russia for Christmas. I asked Katya how I could make it up to you." His eyes danced with light looking to his wife as Katya held a deviant smile. "She gave me a wonderful suggestion…I've brought along a gift for your wedding… that I hope will make up for it." He flashed her another brilliant smile, stepping back to reveal two people standing in the doorway. "Irina, Jack…I'd like you to meet some very good friends of mine."

"Oh Marcelo…" Irina's mouthed gaped in fabulous surprise.

"Who are they?" Weiss whispered in Sophia's ear as she rolled her eyes giggling.

* * *

Irina stood on the small circular platform in front of a curved, wall of mirrors, turning in her dress making sure it was absolutely perfect when she heard a soft knocking on the door.

"Mom, can we can come in?" She heard Sydney's voice through the door.

"Of course, Sweetheart." She smiled taking a deep breath as she watched the door open behind her in the smiled widened at the audible gasp coming from both her daughter and her sister as they stood wide-eyed and covering their mouths stunned.

"You…look… so beautiful." Sydney felt her eyes tearing up as she caught her mother's eyes in the mirror and Irina turned to face them, her long train and full skirt whooshing to the side with her moves.

The off-white, strapless bodice clung to her torso and every curve perfectly, before flowing into a massive full skirt and train with delicate designs and diamonds sewn in intricate patterns along its edges and across her chest. The back dipped into a low 'v', exposing almost the entire length of her gorgeous back that had both Katya and Sydney wondering how she was keeping the dress up with enormous 'baby' cleavage. A series of tiny white eye-lit buttons held the back together before flowing into the skirt. Her hair had been pulled up behind a gorgeous Romanov diamond tiara that held her veil cascading down her back. Her ears adorned with delicate diamond studs and neck with one of the most spectacular pieces of the Romanov jewels. All of the pieces matching.A necklace consisting of 240 perfect white diamonds that encircled her entire neck worth tens of millions of dollars; its matching bracelet adorned her delicate wrist. By far the most stunning and spectacular pieces of jewelry Sydney had ever seen in her life.

Irina had never looked more beautiful in all her life and Sydney wasn't sure how her father was going to be able to stay conscious when he saw her walking towards him.

"So you like it?" Irina asked nervous as the butterflies filled her stomach. Her life long dream finally coming true.

"Mom…you're breathtaking. I can hardly breathe and I'm your daughter!" Sydney laughed as the happy tears spilled onto her cheeks. "Dad's going to pass out!"

Irina laughed softly, taking a deep breath as she turned back towards the mirror looking at herself for the final time.

"Oh Rina," Katya cried, her hands clasped together in front of her mouth as if she were praying. "I've never seen you more beautiful in all my life. You look so much like Mama right now." Katya tried blinking back her tears as best she could. "She would be so happy for you today. I know she's here with us…this is what she always wanted for you."

Irina turned and extended her hand, stepping carefully off the small ledge as she took her sisters hand smiling. "Thank you for being here with me, Katya." Irina spoke softly to her sister in Russian. "This means the world to me, to have your forgiveness and your blessing on my marriage."

"Oh Rina," Katya carefully pulled her sister into a hug. "You deserve all the happiness in the world. I love you." She cried, before shaking her head, sniffling and Sydney stepped into to embrace her mother.

"Enough with this crying. Your groom is waiting for you!" Sydney handed Irina her beautiful bouquet of hot pink and fuchsia flowers, the perfect combination for their outdoor wedding in such a spectacular setting.

"Are you ready?" Dmitri met them at the door with an adoring smile, his own breath stolen by her beauty.

"All my life." Irina smiled, kissing his cheek as he took her arm in his.

_***Time To Say Goodbye***_

A Lutheran minister and Orthodox Priest stood side by side, smiling at a nervous Jack in his brilliant tuxedo on the most beautiful, perfect, day near the edge of the cliff overlooking the expanse of the mighty Pacific Ocean.

The sun was shining, on the verge of setting and cast a spectacular warm glow of light dancing across the ocean, crashing into the shore below them.

The guests in attendance filling a couple of rows of white chairs that lined an aisle made of a long white silk fabric, lying over the brilliant green grass. An enormous wall of Bougainvillea bushes with their brilliant pink flowers behind them, created separation from the hotel and giving them privacy on the sea-cliff.

An eight-piece orchestra sat off to the side playing one of Irina's favorites songs as Marcello's surprise guests, Sarah Brightman and Andrea Bocelli, sang their wedding march, apparently Marcello and Andrea had grown up like brothers.

Weiss and Sophia were front row with Lena, Sark and Sergei sitting just to the left. Marshall, Carrie, Dixon and his children were behind them.

The Presidents Bush and Putin and their wonderful First Ladies sat in the front row of the other side with Mikhail, Amelie, Kendall and Marcello behind them.

Jack could hardly contain his excitement waiting for his bride and kept trying to peer around the opening and arch in the bushes trying to see her.

Jack's long time friend Ben Devlin stood as his best man just as he had in their first wedding and Vaughn his future-son-in-law, was his groomsman.

Katya appeared under the archway looking absolutely beautiful with a brilliant smile as she began her march up the aisle, earning a smile from Jack, happy to have her apart of this ceremony as Irina's sister.

Sydney as the Maid of Honor appeared under the arch next and Jack felt tears stinging his eyes as his beautiful 'baby-girl' walked towards him, looking as beautiful as the day she was born and Vaughn held his breath staring until he heard Weiss clear his throat with a big smile.

An audible gasp sounded like thunder when Irina on Dmitri's arm appeared under the arch, her eyes locked with Jack's and no one else's.

"Oh. My. God…" Kendall gaped with mouth wide open, his eyes bulging as his face lost all expression seeing Irina.

"_Mamma Mia!_" Marcelo added, slapping Kendall on the back as he felt the breath sucked out of him.

Irina was absolutely the most gorgeous bride that 'any of them' had ever seen, like she walked straight out of a fairy-tale.

Sydney was already crying watching her mother walk towards her father and Jack couldn't breathe. He hadn't taken a breath and refused to blink since she first appeared and felt his heart and stomach simultaneously drop to his toes.

"Wow." Marshall couldn't pick his chin up as his mouth hung open.

"You said it brother." Weiss's eyes were as wide as saucers and Sark stared wide-eyed having never seen Irina like this before. The most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

"Oh Mikhail," Bella gasped when Irina approached them, her eyes filled with tears for the couple she just met. "She's breathtaking."

Everyone had tears in their eyes before Irina was even down the aisle.

Irina's smile was infectious as Dmitri kissed her cheeks and placed her hand with Jack's. She was staring into his pooling eyes and noticed he was turning slightly blue.

"Breathe Jack." She smiled in her sweet voice, she had literally taken his breath away. "Breathe Jack!" She commanded again when he hadn't and nudged him, causing him to sway backwards with his locked knees and gasp loudly making everyone laugh watching the exchange.

"There are no words." He whispered staring straight into her dazzling dark eyes.

Jack couldn't think of any word in any language that would due her beauty justice in this moment standing before him.

"Oh Mama." Marshall inhaled sharply when Irina's back was exposed to them for the first time and Carrie scrunched her eyebrows trying to ignore his 'lusting' after Irina. The woman was spectacular after all; she couldn't blame him.

The minister began the ceremony and everyone faded into the background as Jack and Irina saw only each other. Irina handed Sydney her bouquet when they were about to begin their vows with the most brilliant smile Sydney had ever seen on her mother's face.

Irina turned back to Jack and took both of her hands in his as the Orthodox priest wrapped their hands in the traditional cloth, binding them together as he spoke in Russian of the sanctity of marriage in the eyes of God.

The sunlight cascading onto Irina's diamonds sending out waves of light making her glow…

"I, Irina Nikolaevna Alexandra Dmitrievna Romanova Derevkova," Irina began, her eyes liquid pools of happiness saying her real name this time, "Take you, Jonathan Donahue to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold," She inhaled a long shaky breath staring at the man she loved, "To love and to cherish, in good times and in bad," Her voice was quivering with emotion as she looked into his own tear filled eyes, thinking about how they had already survived through the good and the bad, "In sickness and in health, for as long as we both shall live.".

"I, Jonathan Donahue," Jack began speaking in Russian, wanting to promise himself to her in the language of her heart.

"Take you, Irina Nicholavena Alexandra Dmitrievna Romanova Derevkova," He said each part of her name slowly and Irina's tears spilled out of her eyes and down her cheeks, shaking as she heard him say her name, in her own language. "To be my lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, in good times," His thumbs were running over the backs of her hands holding them in his own beneath the satiny fabric binding them. Tears coursing down his own cheeks looking at her, hearing Sydney and Katya sniffling behind Irina, "And in bad, in sickness and in health, for as long as we both shall live."

She was smiling so brightly Jack felt his heart about to explode with love.

"I love you." Irina whispered to him in Russian, her eyes dancing with light.

"I love you." He mouthed back to her as the minister began speaking and the Priest unwrapped their hands for the exchanging of the rings.

Jack turned to Devlin sniffling and not bothering to wipe his tears as he took the ring and Devlin shook his hand with tears in his own eyes. Devlin thinking about the 30 years of Jack and Irina's relationship; the happiness when they were first married as Jack and Laura, the joy when Sydney was born, the anguish when she 'died.' He thought of their reunion 20 years later and Jack trying to execute her, her escape, their reunion, the birth of a second child, the tragedy of watching her die, the miracle in bringing her back and the love that brought them here…

Irina turning to Sydney at the same time, her tears dripping off her chin as they rolled down her cheeks.

Sydney reached up with her beautiful dimpled smile and gently wiped her mother's tears and Irina grabbed Sydney with both hands and kissed her as a new wave of tears started down her cheeks.

"I love you." She whispered to her daughter, causing Sydney's face to scrunch up as more tears washed over her eyes.

"I love you, Mom." She returned the sentiment, kissing her mother back as she placed her father's ring into Irina's palm. Her parent's love had been tested time and again, separated for twenty years and held fast. There had been anger and hate, hurt and pain but always revolving around their love. Her parent's bond, was unbreakable. Their souls were one and Sydney realized this now more then ever. Both of them, had only ever really lived, when with the other… Without each other, they had walked the world empty and alone. Only when reunited did their souls come back to life, together they can conquer the world.

_***Beautiful Day***_

Irina's hand was shaking when she slid the platinum band over Jack's finger sucking in a shaky breath as she smiled and a fresh round of tears filled her eyes, spilling over and Jack reached up and gently brushed them away smiling.

He held her long slender fingers in his hand and slipped her wedding band into place next to her engagement ring, completing it, making it one. His own hands shaking as he held both hers, in his.

The Priest anointed and blessed both of their heads smiling madly as the Minister announced them and Jack's eyes were already going to Irina's lips.

"You may now kiss your bride."

He didn't even have the words out of his mouth before Jack's hands went to Irina's face and his mouth came crashing into hers', sending out a wave of laughter, whistles and applause as he was kissing Irina like there was no tomorrow and only stopping when they both could no longer breathe.

"Wow." Irina smiled against his face and grabbed it with her own hands, attacking his already swollen lips with her own.

Jack wrapped his arms around her, literally lifting her high off the ground as she held his face in her hands, fully exploring each other's mouths as their audience cheered again loudly, crying and laughing with joy at Irina and Jack's long awaited happiness.

"I love you Mrs. Irina Bristow." Jack smiled widely with new tears in his eyes staring at his beautiful wife.

"I love you Jonathan." Irina's tears matched his own as they met in the middle of soft, sweet kiss before finally turning to face their guests with enormous smiles.

More whistling ensued and Sydney engulfed the both of them into her arms.

"I'm so happy for you. I love you both, more then I could ever say." She cried and Jack and Irina simultaneously kissed each of her temples, the three of them wrapping their arms around each other and Sophia smiled as she handed Irina the baby and they made it a family hug.

Kendall felt his eyes tearing up, watching as the family was finally reunited.

He only prayed that it would stay that way… He wouldn't ruin their day by telling them a massive bouquet of flowers had arrived at Ops last night from Arvin Sloane wishing them well on their 'short lived happiness.' That son-of-a-bitch was going to die…and soon, but for now, they would celebrate life and love, he could wait until tomorrow.

_***At Last***_

"I never thought I'd say this about them, but they're so adorable." Weiss smiled widely watching Irina and Jack dancing to their first song, foreheads pressed together, Jack's hand on her naked back pressing her to him as his hand held guided her around the floor with enormous smiles on their faces.

"I would have to agree with that assessment." Sophia smiled alongside him, her hand on his thigh. "They are adorable."

"Irina would spit nails if she heard you say she was 'adorable.'" Sark smiled softly watching the obliviously happy couple.

"But she is!" Sophia launched back at him, still upset about him pulling her hair when they were five and four.

"I did not say she was not, in fact I rather agree with that astute observation at this moment, she does look rather adorable." He picked up his champagne flute, grateful to have the use of both arms again. "I only stated the fact that Irina would hate the title of 'adorable."

"Do you always use so many words when you talk?" Steven, Dixon's son, asked from across the table.

"It's a hazard of growing up British. You get the prissy accent and a plethora of ridiculous words that you try to cram as many as possible into one sentence." Vaughn answered the boy smiling while Sark glared at him.

"I will refrain from a retort as I promised Irina I would be on my best behavior." Sark downed his champagne with a sly look and smile.

"This song is perfect for them." Carrie smiled, changing subjects as she watched Irina singing the words to Jack, making him smile and laugh. "I never knew she could sing…do you hear that?"

They all listened closely and could hear Irina's voice mixed in with Etta James.

"It's beautiful."

"Oh yes, Irina has quite the fantastic voice. Of course, she passed that on to Sydney." Sark smiled genuinely at Sydney, still trying to break the ice with her.

They had remained cordial when needed but she never spoke to him or looked at him unless need be. He knew it was going to take time with her.

Sydney's eyes met Sark's and she saw he was being genuine and that annoyed her even more.

A 'snarky Sark' was one thing; a 'genuine Sark' was something else entirely.

"She also plays a mean piano." Weiss poured himself and Sark another glass of champagne. He was trying to find some common ground with the man since the day in the bathroom. Sark was obviously going to be in their lives for the remainder of it, so he thought…might as well 'move on.' "She was tearing up the ivory at Christmas."

"Is there any damn thing Irina Derevko doesn't do and well?" Kendall raised his eyebrows, watching the beautiful woman glide around the floor, continually seeing her in a new light.

"Irina Bristow." Sydney corrected him immediately and then gave a small smile, seeing one on his face.

Champagne was having funny effects on everyone.

"It is easy to see, watching them, how they could have survived so much…Their' love is very powerful." Bella watched with fascination holding a sleeping baby Lena against her chest, hoping that she and Mikhail would find their way back to one another that completely one day…soon.

"This is their anniversary too isn't it?" Laura Bush asked with rapt fascination of her own, watching the intriguing couple that demanded attention.

"Yeah." Sydney's smile was radiant with pride. "Director Devlin," She turned her smile across the table,

"You were the only here, besides my parents, who was present at their first wedding… What was that like?"

"I remember thinking, that your mother was impossibly beautiful…" He smiled with a small laugh, "And impossibly young as came she walking down the aisle. Your father was so nervous, he was shaking all day and the night before, worried, that your mother would realize who she was marrying and runaway screaming."

Everyone at the table burst out laughing and caught Jack and Irina's attention.

"Something was obviously funny." Irina smiled brightly, "Seeing that its Ben telling the story, I can only assume they're talking about us."

She turned her attention back to Jack and noticed he hadn't taken his eyes off of her.

"Many years from now…I will die with the vision of you, on this day in my mind." Jack felt his breath catch again, staring into her dark eyes as her flesh burned hot beneath his hand. "There really are no words Irina…that would do you justice."

"I love the way you love me." She admitted, feeling tears prickling her eyes with how much love she felt for this man.

"For the rest of my life…you have my everything." Jack leaned down and kissed her lips, slowly seeking entrance as his tongue parted her lips in a sweet and sensual kiss.

"I don't think they care if we're here at all," Vaughn laughed looking at his future in-laws, "Look at them. They haven't taken their eyes off each other since she appeared under that arch. Like they're the only two people that exist in their world right now." He smiled warmly at Sydney, seeing her glow with happiness.

"That's the way its always been with them." Devlin laughed softly, "For the entire 11 years they were together before her extraction…they only had eyes for each other, no matter how many people were in the room. There was always the chemistry, that electricity flowing through them and everyone around them felt it. When we learned the truth about Irina. I knew that no matter what her real name was or what the assignment, she had loved Jack just as much as he had loved her. No one could 'play-pretend' that long, not with that much love and devotion." He smiled at Sydney seeing her tears building. "I know that Jack knew it, too. I think that's why he was so terrified when you're mother turned herself in twenty years later. He'd spent all those years trying to tell himself he hated Irina but when he saw her…he knew he still loved her as much as he ever had. He was trying to fight it, I think they both were. Both scared of getting hurt so deeply again."

"Well obviously they got over that sometime in Panama." Kendall deadpanned pointing with his eyes to the baby and everyone burst out laughing, except for Sark who'd just realized 'when' that baby was conceived and 'how' Jack Bristow managed to plant that little tracker on a very specific body part of Irina's.

Finally, he shook his head and laughed at the crazy couple.

"Say, I always wanted to know how you managed to cut the tracker signal that Jack put into Irina, so fast. How did you do it?" Marshall's eyes lit up looking to Sark and everyone else's eyes fell on him as well.

A few knew what he was talking about, the rest hadn't a clue but listened to what sounded like a fantastic story.

"I electrocuted her. Overloaded the circuit." Sark shrugged and sipped his champagne as their eyes bugged out.

"Jeezus!" Kendall gasped looking at Sark then out at Irina.

"You..you, you did what?" Marshall fumbled with words in shock.

"How?" Dixon asked just as alarmed, all of them realizing Irina was pregnant at this time.

"I used cardio paddles on her." Sark replied matter-o-factly and those present at Irina's execution simultaneously had a flashback of her bouncing off the table as they tried shocking her back to life over and over again.

"Maybe that's why Lena came out glowing?" Weiss snickered and everyone laughed hysterically again.

_***Power of Love***_

When Jack and Irina arrived back at their suite, the entire room was bathed in soft candlelight; hundreds of candles and thousands of various colored rose petals covering the entire room.

"Oh, Jack, it's beautiful." Irina gasped in awe as she entered their suite with Lena sleeping in her arms, tears already coming to her eyes when Jack placed a soft kiss to the back of her bare shoulder.

He removed his tuxedo jacket and tie, laying them over the back of a chair as he watched Irina, absolutely stunning in her wedding gown and diamonds, place their sleeping baby into her little basket.

Irina's smile as she dropped a feather light kiss to their daughters cheek, radiant, and Jack found it hard to breathe again, taking her in.

Her eyes met Jack's when she looked up and the smile only grew. He looked so handsome, her husband. He'd unbuttoned his shirt and was removing his cuff links as he walked towards her. He set the diamond links on a dresser as eyes locked onto hers, his hand extending asking for hers. Irina's fingers closed over his as he pulled her to stand in front of him.

Jack's eyes roaming over the gorgeous woman before him, taking it all in and committing it to memory. His fingertips dragging slowly up her arms following the contours of her muscles and sending shivers through Irina with his light touch; over her shoulders and delicately down the length of her spin, until she was encircled in his arms. Irina's ample chest, pushed up with her dress hid most of her scar and the last few remaining inches took nothing away from her beauty.

Jack bent his head and placed a soft kiss in the middle of her chest, over the scar and started a trail of kisses up her neck and over her collarbone, his tongue trailing lazily around the diamonds and over her impossibly smooth skin and he heard Irina gasp lightly as his kiss landed on a sensitive spot below her ear.

He pulled his face back slowly to look into her eyes and found them glistening with unshed tears of happiness. She tilted her face to his and Jack's eyes went to her lips, leaning forward slowly until he captured her bottom lip between his own.

Irina slid the tip of her tongue lightly over his upper lip, seeking entrance into his sweet depts. Jack's mouth opened wider and their tongues brushed lightly as they met in the middle starting a familiar dance.

Irina's hands pressing up his chest and curling around the back of his neck bringing him closer and the kiss deepened with the building passion.

Jack felt her warm tears against his face, brushing his nose softly against hers as he pulled back with uneven breath, their eyes immediately seeking out the others.

"I've waited for this day all my life." She smiled softly as another tear fell down her cheek. "Thank you." She took a deep breath. "For loving me, 'Irina' and all my imperfections."

Jack's heart-ached with love and a small wave of sadness, that in spite of their love when they were married before, there was always a part of her she was never allowed to show him and it hurt her to hold back. That he was never able to love all of her, that part of Irina that she held back in Laura.

"I love you, Irina, all of you and only you. You are my life…you are my love…you are my everything." He smiled softy, gently wiping her tears with his thumb. "I meant what I said that night in Russia, " His brown searching hers, "Every time I look at you, every time you smile. I fall that much more in love with you. Just when I think I couldn't possibly love you any more, you surprise me." His smiled grew. His hand moved behind her slender neck and his lips melded with hers once more.

Carefully, he helped her remove the tiara and veil, kissing her neck softly from behind at the newly exposed flesh. Soft brown wisps of hair creating small curls that he let his fingers play with as his mouth moved over her shoulder and down her back.

His hands moving to undo the row of tiny buttons as his mouth kept tracing every line, every muscle curve in her back.

Irina closed her eyes, smiling and savoring his every touch. When he had finished the task at hand she turned slowly to face him and her dress made a soft whooshing noise as its massive skirt kept her dress from falling off completely.

It was Irina's turn to pay him special attention. Her seductive eyes catching his as her fingers slowly worked to undo the rest of the buttons on his shirt, her knuckles purposely dragging against his hot flesh and she heard his breathing deepen the lower she got until his shirt was finally open. Her hands open as she softly pushed up his abdomen and chest with her finger tips, her arms pushing the material back and over his shoulders.

Irina stepped closer and lay soft kisses, letting her scorching tongue barely touch his skin as she worked around his neck and shoulders slowly pushing his shirt down his back and off of his arms. Jack felt himself growing painfully hard inside the confines of his pants and inhaled sharply when he felt her teeth nip the flesh at the base of his throat.

Her tongue swirling the small indention there as her long fingers undid the button of his pants and slowly unzipped them, his arousal pressing against the fabric. Irina smiled feeling him harden beneath her touch as she caressed him lightly over the material and he gasped in pleasure.

Her fingers threading under the elastic waist band, from the front and dragging them around to his sides pulling his pants and boxers off simultaneously, leaning down with her eyes locked to his as she slowly pulled them down the length of his body and freeing him.

Her eyes smiling appreciatively seeing his cock standing at attention against his stomach and Jack moaned loudly when she leaned forward and placed a kiss to the under side of his shaft at its base.

The only attention she gave it before kissing the sensitive area around it and up his stomach, now defined with hints of the muscles beneath from all their new abdominal -workouts in lovemaking.

Irina smiled against his skin as she felt him tightening with her every kiss as she slowly made her way back up his body, her tongue swirling over his nipple, nipping at them and making Jack mew.

Everything in him wanted to grab her by the arms and pull her mouth to his, when she trailed her tongue under the edge of his jaw. Kissing every part of his neck and face, around his mouth but never kissing it.

His hands pulled her to him and he cupped her face crashing his mouth over his in a hot wet kiss as hit tongue plunged into her hot depths, making love to it with his tongue, thrusting and sucking as Irina's hands gripped his back, pulling her to him in the desperation of the moment, her fingers digging into his skin until they were both panting for air.

Being inside her heated mouth made Jack yearn to be buried deep inside her as his cock pressed into the soft satiny fabric of her dress. His hands moved down her back and to the edges of the fabric, pushing down with enough pressure to slide over her hips and Irina helped him by wiggling.

Jack's mouth broke contact with hers and a slight whimper escaped from her lips at the loss of contact. Pressing the dress to the floor and leaving her completely naked much to Jack's surprise.

"Surprise." She smiled down at him devilishly with her husky voice. Panties under all that dress fabric were, a waste of time.

Jack dropped forward on to his knees and brought his hands up to her hips, pulling her towards him.

His mouth met the searing skin of her abdomen, and Irina's hands threaded into his hair as he assaulted her with his flaming tongue, his kisses getting lower and lower making her pant.

Jack moved his hands over the curve of her hips and lightly brushed over her perfect behind before forcefully squeezing when the thrust his tongue into her belly button.

Irina felt her core calling to him as it began to swirl and twist with desire. His mouth kissed around the delicate skin surrounding her apex of pleasure and causing Irina's breath to hitch.

His hands slowly sliding her legs further apart as his wet kisses worked her inner thighs.

She was already wet with desire from his lingual assault and bit her lip, letting her head lull to the side when she felt Jack place the first kiss against her folds, his tongue darting in and out, tasting her scent and flicking her throbbing pulse, making Irina moan loudly inside her mouth almost humming with anticipation.

His tongue rolled her swollen bundle of nerves against his upper teeth and Irina's legs began to quiver. Slowly Jack brought one hand up to her center and let two of his fingers play in her folds, lightly grazing her skin, spreading her wetness as his mouth continued to taunt her pleasure point.

The feel of his mouth against her aching flesh causing small sounds to escape from the back of her throat, his fingers mercilessly teasing her with their delicate dance.

Jack felt her desperation and slowly inserted the fingers into her hot core making her mew as he wiggled them back and forth caressing her internally.

Irina felt herself about to explode as he worked the bundles of nerves inside and out simultaneously and her breathing turned into quick pants. Her hands shaking as she gripped his hair, her legs began trembling and Jack thrust his fingers deeper making her throw her head back and gasp loudly as a strangled cry burned inside her when she exploded and convulsed around his fingers.

Jack continued to taunt her as her muscles constricted around his fingers, pulsating as she road the waves of her climax and his tongue swirled in her juices.

His desire raged inside him watching her fall over the edge and his cock painfully throbbed against his stomach, demanding attention. He quickly extracted his fingers and Irina inhaled sharply at the sudden loss of contact.

His hands returning to her hips as he pulled himself to stand before her, his mouth colliding into hers, letting his tongue explore the well known. His hardness pressing into her stomach and his balls tickled by her soaked curls causing him to quiver with excitement.

Irina tasted herself on his lips and tongue and she moaned with need for him to be buried inside her quickly. His hands slid under her ass and he forcefully picked her up, and Irina wrapped her arms and legs around him, attacking his mouth with her plundering tongue.

Jack walked them to the edge of their bed and walked on his knees carrying her around him to the center of the bed. Her drenched lips surrounding his dick as their bodies pressed together and he moaned into her mouth dying to be enveloped in the heat he could feel radiating from her core.

Sitting on his knees, his hands lifted Irina higher against his body, holding her with one hand while he aligned his rock hard shaft with her entrance, moaning and gasping when his sensitive head played in her dripping folds.

He pushed himself in just an inch and felt Irina trembling with excitement. His mouth moved down to her sexy diamond adorned neck and he thrust himself quickly into her making Irina inhale sharply with a soft cry as he pulled himself deeper inside her.

Her tight muscles pulsating and stroking his length inside her as she adjusted the angle of her hips, allowing him to penetrate her deeper until it was almost painful.

Jack's hands gripping her firm ass and sliding up Irina's back feeling every muscle and bone beneath her smooth skin cupping her slender body just over her ribcage. His mouth dipped to her breasts, sucking, flicking and biting their' tortured peaks, tasting the sticky sweetness that nourished their daughter as Irina's muscles continued to caress him inside.

She closed her eyes, digging her fingers into his shoulders as he brought her closer to the edge just being inside her and assaulting her nipples. She began gyrating against his hips forcing his length to move inside her and both she and Jack moaned in pleasure from the sensation it was creating.

Jack's cock twitched inside of her and he held her to him with one hand while he leaned forward, slowly lying on her down on the bed. He wanted to be able to look at her while they made love and Irina had no objections wanting to see his face and feel his welcomed weight on top of her again.

His cock had almost pulled out completely with the move, remaining hovering just inside her secret place. His strong arms braced against the bed so that he was just above her with the support of his knees.

His eyes sought hers' and was hypnotized by their swirling black depths, overwhelmed with love and reflecting the electricity building inside her. He dipped his head to seize her swollen lips in a sweet passionate kiss as his tongue trailed slowly overthem, spreading the wetness of their mouths.

Jack pulled back slowly to gaze in her face with a small smile as he slowly pushed back inside her, watching the ragged intake of breath and wash of pleasure the contact brought her. Her eyes tearing when he was fully buried in her warmth.

Her hands rose to his sides and he slowly reversed his length pulling out with measured pace before rapidly plunging back inside and making Irina gasp for breath. He found his rhythm and picked up his pace thrusting inside as she clenched around him matching his rhythm.

Jack's eyes started to tear looking at the woman below him, thrusting his manhood into her heat and overwhelmed with love and elation that they'd found one another again.

Her little pants for breath quickened with their pace and Jack's head dipped to capture her lips, his tongue thrusting into her mouth as his cock pulled away creating a wash of sensations for the both them and shoving them violently towards the edge.

Jack's tears spilled over his lids and onto her cheeks as he pumped furiously inside her feeling his body about to explode.

Irina felt his warm tears and her body began trembling violently before suddenly tensing as she flew over the edge of passion and screamed his name into his mouth, her body convulsing around him and she dug her nails into his flesh at the intensity of the nirvana ripping through her entire body.

He kissed her cheeks and eyes with every rapid thrust on her heels of pleasure and his last forceful drives, his eyes burning into hers as he told her he loved her in her language with every thrust.

"I. Love. You. Irina. Forever. And. Always…" And on the last word he exploded inside her spilling his seed deep into her depths gasping for air with a strangled cry of her name, his head falling into the crook of her neck, his arms and ass burned continuing to pump into her with every last ounce of energy wanting to stay inside her forever, he rode out his waves in heaven.

Irina felt his warm breath against her neck as he pumped until spent, her muscles milking his shaft as is deflated inside. Slowly, and carefully he collapsed onto her body, his head buried into her neck as his arms locked Irina into his embrace. Irina didn't mind his weight at all, feeling safe and loved beneath it, his body covering hers and filling it up with a blanket of love and security.

_***Ice Cream***_

"I love you, Jonathan Donohue Bristow…" She whispered with labored breaths into his hair as his breath continued to tickle her neck. "Happy Anniversary." She inhaled a shaky breath with a smile as new tears formed.

Jack pushed himself up onto his elbows to look at her, his wife…the woman he loved staring up at him flushed, surrounded by rose petals and a smile came to his sated face. "Happy Anniversary Irina."

Irina tilted her head up and met his mouth in a hot languid kiss, spending several minutes caressing and expressing their love for one another through the kiss.

When he pulled out of her warm confines, he moved only slightly to shift the majority of his weight off to the side while his head rested against her chest, listening to the thundering beat of the heart beneath, his arm lazily draped over her abdomen as the lay half covered in a tangled mess of sheets and rose petals until their bodies had calmed down.

Irina's arm draped over his back and playing with the hair at the base of his neck while her arm covered his, lying over her belly.

Jack watched the refracted candle light bounce around the room every time Irina moved her diamond-covered wrist.

A smile lit his face when he heard Lena start to snort with frustration before crying out in hunger.

She had perfect timing, a very good baby. He rolled off Irina to let her up and propped himself up on his elbow, head in hand watching her retrieve their baby with a big smile.

Irina's naked retreating form gliding across the candle lit room, her hair still pulled up in a French twist with only a few stray wisps that had escaped during their lovemaking, diamonds dangling from her ears and around her neck.

She was certainly exotic.

Irina smiled softly at her baby, soothing her with her words as she picked her up, holding her up to her shoulder, whispering words of love and tenderness in her tiny ear as Lena nuzzled the soft flesh in Irina's neck.

She turned smiling and walked back towards the bed, one hand cupping the baby's head the other just under her little bum. Jack pulled back the sheet as Irina slipped inside, laying down on her side carefully and guiding Lena down to her chest.

The baby's eyes completely focused on Irina, listening to her speak to her as she ate, watching her mother with fascination now that she could see the woman the voice belonged to.

Lena palmed Irina again with her tiny hand and fingers and Jack's face broke into a big smile watching his daughter looking up at her mother, holding onto her tightly as she nursed. His hand ran down Irina's side, resting on her hip as he moved towards them.

Lena's little legs and feet poking out of her sleeper and he laughed softly as she fanned her toes.

"She is so cute." He cooed taking one little foot in his hand, smiling happily.

Lena seemed disturbed by this and pulled away from Irina suddenly, moving her little face with that famous scrunched eyebrow to look at Irina with both eyes.

"It's not me!" Irina laughed softly with bright eyes, looking into her baby's.

Lena suddenly pulled her legs up into the fetal position and turned her face back to her mother, resuming her eating and Jack and Irina both laughed at how funny she already was.

"She's got a great personality." Jack smiled watching as Lena eyed the light refracting off Irina's necklace and slowly closed her eyes, falling back to sleep.

"I can't believe she's already three months old today…time is going so fast." Irina smiled warmly as her fingers caressed the soft skin and hair at the nap of her baby's scooted down slightly and pulled her arm under her head, using the bent limb as a pillow and Jack did the same.

They looked at each other for a long time, smiling having entire conversations without saying words…something very easy for them to do and slowly, Irina's eyes got heavy with exhaustion and fluttered shut, a smile still on her face when her breathing evened out.

Jack smiled brighter as he studied his wife with their baby, both in sleep, for a few minutes before closing his own eyes with a smile.

They spent all of Sunday morning and afternoon in that room, making love over and over and only saw the others when it was time to head back to Los Angeles later that evening.

There would be no honeymoon until after they found Sloane, time was running out for them to find him; both of them agreeing that the real honeymoon would be when it was all over with and they now longer had to worry about the rat bastard-asses.


	42. Chapter 42

_**AN: Well, this chapter is just 'hot...' They're newlyweds afterall ;) But also fun, funny and informative!**_

_**Music for this chapter (on repeat): Toxic by Britney Spears, and Drive by Melissa Ferrick, The Love Theme by Nino Rota from The Godfather Soundtrack**_

* * *

__FORTY-TWO

o

Monday morning came and went with another busy day of pouring over Intel and lots of talk about the fantastically beautiful wedding and bride, Jack and Irina were making eyes at each other all day, still lost in their own world. Devlin had been correct in his assessment and now everyone saw what he'd meant. Finding Sloane's gift and card waiting for them only incensed their anger and more determined to find him.

Jack, Irina, Sark and Lena had been home about a half hour when Irina approached Sark, with the baby. He still hadn't held her. Sark had tried resisting, more terrified to hold the baby then to carry a nuclear weapon but Irina won and now Lena was snuggled against his chest sleeping and sucking rapidly on her pacifier.

"See…it's not so bad, is it?" Irina's eyes danced with light as she smiled broadly at him, seeing his posture relax, holding the baby protectively and carefully to him.

"No, it isn't I guess. She is just so small…I am afraid if I move from this spot I will drop her." His eyes wide with worry and Irina chuckled.

"You won't drop her, I promise. Not with the way you are holding her…she's very safe." She smiled reaching out to run her hand over her baby's head. "See how relaxed she is with you already?"

Sark's eyes looked down over the baby and watched her little arms go limp when she went into a deep sleep.

"Are you ok with her?" Irina stood from where they were sitting on the couch, looking down at the both of them smiling.

"Yes…why?" His face immediately flashing with panic when he saw her reaching for her purse. "Where are you going?"

"Jack and I need to run to the store for a little bit, to pick up some things for dinner tonight. We'll only be gone 30 minutes at the most…Can you handle that?" She tried not laughing at how terrified he was to be left alone with a baby.

The store would take ten minutes…their 'drive' in the car would be a quick one.

"What if she wakes up? What if she's hungry? What if she needs to be changed?" His mouth fired off rapid questions. 'How could Irina trust him to be alone with this child? Her most precious baby? One she rarely put down or let out of her sight! She must be testing him…'

"She should sleep for at least an hour, I just fed her and changed her. You shouldn't have to do a thing…except watch her." She leaned over and kissed Lena's head and caught Sark's eyes. Kissing his cheek quickly adding, "I trust you Julian." She smiled, speaking in her 'motherly tone' again that he was not used to. He nodded 'ok.'"Sydney and Michael will be joining us for dinner." She paused by the door, waiting for Jack to meet her there. "They could be here anytime…If you need anything before they get here, call my cell 'ok?" Irina flashed him another brilliant smile as Jack eyed him on the couch, and Sark swallowed hard. "Bye…"

'This may be the toughest assignment Irina had ever given him.' He sat perfectly still for at least five minutes, watching the small bundle rise and fall with his chest and marveled at her size.

Her little ears, her long eyelashes like her mother, her perfect little nose, and tiny hands, her feet that were no longer then his smallest finger and that's when he realized why he was so terrified of her…she was easily breakable and he felt himself tense. Lena noticed and scrunched her eyebrows, digging her face against his shirt and Sark froze, hoping she wouldn't wake up.

'Relax, relax, relax…' He chanted internally to himself and as he calmed, Lena stopped stirring. He smiled that he had figured out on his own what to do to keep her comfortable. He could handle this…He picked up the new People magazine from the coffee table featuring a story on Sydney and Irina and began to read what was bound to be 'fascinating…'

* * *

_***Toxic***_

"We've got twenty minutes." Irina flew out of the driver's seat of her Porsche and attacked Jack with her lips when they pulled into the far space in the parks parking lot.

Jack's hands were pawing all over her and their tongues dueled, licking and sucking, biting and teasing in a furious manner. His hands fumbled with the buttons on Irina's pants, trying to undo them as fast as possible struggling. He wasn't moving fast enough for Irina, who was on fire and needed him inside her immediately with their time crunch. She broke lip contact, leaned back undid her pants slid them down over her hips and kicked them to the floor of the car. Her lips immediately sought out Jack's again as his hands grabbed her, pulling her into his lap. His hard-on growing with anticipation as he felt the naked flesh of her thighs, straddling him, the excitement making love in public where anyone could see them. Irina's fingers feverishly worked to undo the button on Jack's jeans and zipper.

"Lift your ass!" She commanded and he complied so she could slide his pants down over his butt at least, freeing his cock. He was incredibly turned on with her commanding tone, the side of 'The Man' he loved. Her hands greedily stroked it, making him harder as she rubbed his cock against her already slick folds.

His hand reached under her and forcefully glided his fingers into her folds, taking his dick out of her hands and teasing its tips against her entrance as his other hand pressed its thumb into her clit, rubbing in small fast circles and eliciting gasps and moans from Irina. Her fingers slid through her own juices and pushed aside her thong strap, before thrusting herself down and onto him making them both gasp.

"Ooh…this is fun." Jack waggled his eyebrows feeling her contracting around him making him rock-hard.

"Faster Jack! We have to hurry." She commanded in a desire laden voice as she bit his lip and moved her legs and hips, trying to find a comfortable way to start her 'ride,' on the little seat.

"Whoa!" He laughed as she pulled the recline lever and their seat tilted back a little too fast. His hands slid up under her shirt and with no notice, ripped the t-shirt up and over Irina's head. Leaving her in nothing but her black bra and thong. "God you're gorgeous!" He took a second to appreciate his wife and felt the urge to drive into her as fast and as hard as possible. He grabbed her hips with his hands, gripping almost painfully into her skin and pulled her onto him hard making Irina shriek with the friction of their angle.

Irina felt him filling her completely and his length penetrating deeply as they started their furious pace with Jack thrusting up into her and Irina thrusting down onto him. She undid the clasp in the front of her bra and freed her breasts from the confines and thrust them into Jack's face as she rode him hard. He buried his face in their soft curves and closed his mouth, dragging his teeth over her nipple causing Irina to inhale sharply as a shudder went through her body. Her hot, tight, drenched core, gripping him like a vice and Jack moaned in pleasure against her breast as Irina increased their speed. Her muscles gripping him with everything she had while she pulled away and Jack groaned loudly in ecstasy with the sensation is created.

Irina put her hands on either side of Jack's head, holding herself steady as she moved her thighs, ass and abs in a fluid motion grinding into him while his tongue assaulted her breasts, biting and pinching.

With Irina took control over their thrusts Jack pressed one hand to the small of her back while his other hand snaked over her hip and pressed hard onto her swollen throbbing clit.

"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!" Irina chanted overwhelmed with pleasure on her nipples, in her core and against her clit. She drove herself deeper onto Jack making them both moan. "Fuck me, Jack! Fuck me! Fuck me! Fuck me!" She practically screamed almost ready to fly over the edge and Jack pumped his hips furiously against her, Irina's commands sending a bolt of lightening straight through him and he screamed pushing them both over the edge with his insane pace.

Irina exploded around him, convulsing out of control, screaming "Oh fuck, Jack!" So loudly he was sure it was heard around the world as her climax rocked her body and the sensations of her internal erratic quivering driving him over the edge and followed right after.

"Oh fuck, Irina!" He screamed against her breasts as he felt his body shatter inside her, grabbing her hips with mean fingers picking up her light body and pounding her onto him again and again screaming… "Ohhhhhhhhhh Fuuuuuuuuuuuck!" As he pumped into her over and over until his sight returned and the last waves of his orgasm passed. When he opened his eyes Irina was smiling at him with black eyes her pupils exploding with climax and slowly constricting again.

"That was a fantastic fuck, Sweetheart! You definitely get an, 'A' for effort on that one." She captured his mouth in a hot open-mouthed kiss as their tongues wrestled until her muscles exploited everything they could from his cock. Irina had gone from 'The Man' to 'Mrs. Robinson' and it made Jack laugh and horny all over again.

Just as quickly as she attacked him, she pulled off of him and slid back over to the drivers seat, finding her pants on the floor and quickly shimming into them.

"Jack," She addressed him trying not to laugh as she captured her breasts again, restraining them with the black fabric. He was sitting in sated stunned silence watching her with his pants pulled down and deflating member lying on his thigh. "We were supposed to be home five minutes ago! Pull yourself together!" She finally laughed and searched the car for her black t-shirt; finding it in the back seat, she quickly pulled it over her head and threaded her arms through the holes, pulling it down over her breasts and torso. "Jack!" Irina grabbed his dick and jerked it hard, bringing Jack out of his daze with a pained aroused expression. "Put 'Panama Jack' away so we can leave please!" She laughed dangerously with devilish eyes. "We'll bring him out to 'play' at the park again another day, I promise!" She leaned over and kissed the side of his mouth. Waiting for Jack as he slowly pulled his pants back up.

Sydney was stunned right out of her shoes when she opened the door and saw Sark lying on the couch barefoot in jeans and a light sweater, Lena asleep on his chest with her little arm dangling over his side, completely relaxed reading a magazine.

Unsettling panic rising within her as she narrowed her eyebrows seeing the man who had tried to kill her on numerous occasions, looking so calm and normal with her sister asleep on his chest.

"Where is my Mom?" She asked quickly as Vaughn came up behind her, same expression on his face.

"They went to the store. Irina said they would return in half of an hour." Sark glanced at his watch with no emotion in his voice, "They should be returning any moment."

"They left you alone with Lena?" Her eyes bulged as she fumed inside, stalking over to the couch and immediately extracting Lena from where she lay. 'What the hell were her parents thinking?'Lena immediately started to fuss, waking up rapidly at the loss of heat from Sark's body and the absence of his heartbeat in her ear. She started crying, wailing within seconds, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Now look what you've done. She was fine were she was." Sark felt himself getting mad that Sydney's need to be in control over him had upset the baby.

"Be quiet." Vaughn's eyes pierced his with a glare as Sydney tried to calm her sister down, feeling guilty that her own anger towards Sark had taken precedent over her sister's needs.

Lena's whole body was turning red with her cries and they were turning into sobs with periods in between where she was holding her breath. Her little body rigid in Sydney's arms as she held her close to her chest trying to calm her down.

Sark sat up fuming himself seeing how upset the baby was. "Try-" He was about to suggest something he saw Irina doing with her but was cut off immediately.

"I don't need advice from you!" Sydney whipped around cutting him off as Lena continued to scream, Sydney's own panic getting the best of her having never seen her sister this upset ever. Nothing she was trying, was working.

"Are you so stubborn that you'd rather let your sister scream in tears then listen to a suggestion of help from me?" Sark stood, toe to toe with Sydney and Vaughn took a step toward them.

"Fine! What do you suggest we do with your extensive knowledge of babies?" She shot back at him, knowing he was right.

"Turn her in your arms so that she is lying on her side, in the crook of your arm…yes, like that," He took hold of Sydney's other arm and placed it how Irina had and Sydney's eyebrows furrowed. "Now pull her close, snuggle her into you…here," He put the baby's pacifier in her mouth but she wouldn't take it.

"Swirl it around the inside of her mouth." Sydney commanded seeing what he was doing.

Sark did as told and Lena eventually accepted it, starting to calm down as she turned her face into Sydney's chest as though she were nursing with Irina; a position of comfort and safety for her. Sydney and Vaughn's eyes both widened in surprise that it had worked. Sark's hand brushed over Lena's head and he wiped her tears with the backs of his fingers; the baby still shaking and trembling as she came down from her fit of rage.

"How did you know how to do that?" Sydney finally swallowed her pride and asked, looking into Sark's glass eyes.

"I've watched Irina with her. This is the position the child seems most comfortable and secure in when Irina holds her." Sark let his hand drop and returned to his seat on the couch.

"You've only been here a week and you've picked up that knowledge just from watching Irina with the baby?" Vaughn asked disbelieving as he ran his own hand over Lena's little head.

"Irina taught me to observe behavior." He picked up the magazine, staring at the photo of Irina and Sydney, "I've known Irina for almost twenty years and never once witnessed her holding a child…this side of her fascinates me. So of course I would observe her as a mother with her own child."

"That is slightly creepy that you are watching her so intently." Sydney's eyes narrowed again as she swayed from side to side, rocking Lena back to sleep.

"Are you going to tell me Pri..." He caught himself, "Sydney, that when Irina turned herself into the CIA, you weren't 'observing' her as intently as I am now? Studying the behavior of a side to your mother you never knew?" Sydney looked away, 'she had,' and Sark had his answer."I thought so. I am merely doing the same thing. This is a side of Irina, I never knew." He sat back against the cushions. "We have a lot in common Sydney, you and I." He saw her eyes flash with anger.

"We are nothing alike!" She spat at him.

"We both lost our mothers when we were five and six years old. Our fathers weren't a constant in our lives. We were both raised by emotionally detached people incapable of showing us love and affection…You by your father and me by Irina." He pointed out softly and Sydney's eyes darted back to his. "We were both Project Christmas children and entered this life as teenagers. We both grew up idolizing Irina and craving her affection but still tucking ourselves into bed at night."

Sydney hated the fact that Sark was pointing out their many similarities and chipping away at her armor.

"We both lost our first loves to this life," Sark's eyes went to Vaughn to see his reaction, his brow crinkling as he lifted his eyes. "As well as our best friends."

"That's because you killed mine!" Sydney shot back at him, her temper flaring and on the verge of tears.

"And you killed mine." He deadpanned back at her. He had sentenced Francie to die, and Sydney had killed his 'Allison.' Sark felt his own anger rising but remembered his promise to Irina and sighed, letting it go. "Perhaps, the thing we have in common the most Sydney, is that Irina is the most important woman in both our lives."

Sydney felt the tears stinging her eyes and she violently blinked them back, he was not going to make her cry!

"I do not wish to fight with you, Sydney. I am here to help Irina find and capture the bloody bastards who hurt her, make them pay. Something else I believe we have in common." He looked at her thoughtfully. "I am not expecting your forgiveness or any semblance of a relationship with you. I am merely asking that for Irina's sake, we find some common ground. Working together to catch Sloane and Cuvee seems like the place to start."

Sydney took a series of deep breaths. Thankful she didn't have to answer as her parents walked in the door that very moment.

"Hello…" Irina greeted them cautiously, noting their serious faces. "How is everyone?"

"Lovely." Sark greeted her with a fake smile she knew all too well. Seeing the baby was now in Sydney's arms, Irina asked, "Julian…how did it go with Lena? Were you two okay until Sydney and Vaughn arrived?"

"Yeah." Sydney answered for him, surprising everyone. "She was sleeping peacefully against his chest, quite happy."

Sark's eyes darted to her. She had accepted their tentative truce.

"Well that's wonderful! I knew you'd be alright with her." Irina smiled seeing the storm clouds dissipating above them. "Sydney, would you help me in the kitchen for a minute please?" She smiled at her daughter, seeing she was upset about something and wanting to have her alone for a few minutes.

"Of course." Sydney smiled warmly, in return. She loved anytime with her Mom. She walked over to Sark and looked him in the eyes as she passed the baby back to him. Lena immediately nestled into his arms.

Jack and Irina watched the exchange with acute interest. 'Why would Sydney hand the baby to Sark instead of to Vaughn or Jack?' The way she handed her to Sark, was like she was giving him a gift…a peace offering of some kind. Something definitely transpired in their living room.

Sydney followed Irina into the kitchen and smiled amused, trying not to laugh or think to deeply about 'what happened on the way to the store.'

"Mom," She bit her lip when Irina turned to face her, "Your shirt is on inside out."

* * *

"Marshall," Irina approached him the next morning with her enchanting smile and she knew he was Putty in her hands.

Marshall's eyes watching as she approached with her feline moves. Her black skirt and those long muscular legs, her insatiable calves defined with her stance in black heels, the way she flipped her hair over her shoulder and licked and bit her lip sending his libido into overdrive and it wasn't even 8am.

"Ye…ye, ye, yes Mrs. Bristow." He smiled nervously starting to sweat under her intense gaze and Irina's heart smiled hearing someone address her as Mrs. Bristow again.

"Marshall, there is a problem with the monitors in the high security cell-blocks." Her eyes bore into his, standing in front of him with her intimidating posture while still looking seductive.

"What? Are you sure? I mean…They were working just a minute ago." Marshall was suddenly perplexed looking across the floor to the monitors that fed video feed from her old cell.

"No no, Marshall." She got closer, inches from his face and watched as he swallowed hard. "The monitors 'aren't working' right now…for say," Her eyes danced with mischievousness, "Twenty minutes…technical malfunction. They are offline." She winked at him and he tried swallowing the massive lump but without succeeding. "Do you understand what I am saying?"

Marshall's palms began sweating profusely as he clenched his fists, Irina so close to him he could feel her breath against his face…and her perfume was intoxicating making him dizzy. He knew what she wanted and he was trying not to think about 'why' though his libido screamed it through his head. "Yeassh." He answered in a combination of 'yes' and 'yeah' unable to form any coherent thoughts in this moment. "Technical malfunction. Twenty minutes…" He finally gulped, "Video feed offline."

"Thank you." She smiled brightly and kissed the corner of his mouth, winking at him before turning to leave. She knew that wasn't fair but all is fair in love and sex…

"Jack come with me now…please." She walked up to him quickly. He was talking to Sydney, Vaughn and Weiss. "I need to talk with you about some 'unfinished business."

"Ok." Jack looked at her expectantly as did the others.

"In private." Her eyes drilling into his, sending a clear message that sent an instant twitch to his groin.

"We can talk out here." He was motioning toward the steal doors leading to the prison cells.

"Don't forget Kendall's called a minute in twenty-five minutes." Sydney smiled brightly.

"Thank you Sweetheart. It won't take long." Irina flashed her brilliant smile.

"Irina…" Jack yelped walking briskly to keep up with her. "What are we doing? I mean I know what we're doing but where?"

"You told me if I found a way…" She threw a seductive smile over her shoulder and Jack's eyes went wide. He never should have challenged her. This was insane!

"Irina, we can't!" Jack hissed out a breath even as he felt himself getting excited at the prospect.

"You promised, Jack…Are you going to break your promise?" Her doe eyes dared him too. Seeing the look on his face she knew he wouldn't. "Tell the guards we have something important to discuss and need some privacy…look like your pissed at me. It shouldn't be to hard for them to believe considering they saw it everyday for 10 months after I turned myself in. Twenty minutes…"

Jack through her a disturbed look and she smiled, turning it into a scowl as they approached the guards. "We have some unfinished business to discuss and need some privacy. No one enters until we leave. Understood?" He gave them his infamous Jack Bristow glare and scowl, his tone daring them to defy.

The guards looked at him and then Irina who looked like she was fuming.

"Yes, Agent Bristow." The guard seemed to shrink under their stare.

Jack pushed Irina on the shoulder for good measure, forcing her to walk in front of him as the gates rose in front of them. When they were standing outside her old cell she looked at it strangely for a moment.

"So this is what it looks like from this side…" She smiled enigmatically and Jack's breathing picked up punching the button and the door opened.

_***Drive***_

"We have 17 minutes." He grabbed her hand and pulled her inside with a desperate look of desire coursing through his eyes.

"Well then get to it…Agent Bristow." Her dark eyes ran deep with seduction and her voice deepened. Intentionally accenting his name with a heavy Russian lit. "I'm the naughty girl after all…show me who's boss." She could hardly say it without breaking a smile and into fits of laughter.

"You naughty Russian tease." Jack rapidly grabbed her by the lapels on her suit jacket, crashing his mouth into hers his tongue demanding entrance as he backed her into the cell. "Wait!" He stopped with rapid breath. "The monitors!" He pointed to the little camera.

"Taken care of…" Irina drug her hot tongue along his jaw-line and flicked his ear lobe, "That's why we're on a time schedule…so hurry up and fuck me…Agent Bristow." She growled into his ear and Jack's cock jerked in his pants. He peeled her suit jacket off and let it drop to the floor pulling at her white blouse, pulling it out of her skirt. Irina's hands went to his shirt and Jack grabbed them with one of his stopping the motion.

"I don't think so Ms. Derevko, you're the naughty girl here. I'm in charge." He breathed heavily against her face using his stern tone.

"I surrender." Irina lifted her hands in mock surrender more turned on then she could have ever imagined. "Do me the way you wanted to…when we were working on the Kane problem." She whispered huskily with her thick accent and dangerous gleam in her eye. She had been dying to know these thoughts since that day in this cell.

Jack moved with speed as he undid the last button and roughly pulled the shirt from her body dropping it to the floor behind him. She stood before him in heels, a black mid-length skirt and white lace bra. His strong hands gripped her rib cage as he crashed his mouth over hers again seizing her lips in a frenzied kiss as he picked her up and pushed her back against the glass with a thud.

Irina gasped when his hand roughly tugged at the hemline of her skirt forcing it up her thighs and plunging his hand towards her center, his eyes widening when his fingers met wet curls and nothing else. She didn't have any underwear on.

"I thought ahead." Irina replied in husky Russian; giving up the accent and just driving it home with the actual language and Jack's eyes turned primal.

He used his knee to force her legs apart and pinched her clit, rolling it between his thumb and forefinger eliciting a sharp intake of breath from Irina as her throbbing pulse stung with the pressure. Knowing they hadn't a lot of time, he palmed her center and used his middle finger in a 'come-hither' gesture to slide between her folds while his palm ground into her clit, his face inches from hers, their eyes locked. Irina moaned in pleasure when his long finger plunged into her darkness.

"Faster Jack…time." She hissed in Russian and Jack covered her mouth with his own to keep her from speaking, pulling his hand away as his hands undid his belt and the buttons and zipper on his pants.

He roughly pushed down his boxers and grabbed his rock-hard shaft yanking it a couple of time roughly in his closed fist, before he pressed her further into the glass holding her there with his weight.

His hands pushed her skirt up higher until it was around her waist. His knee pressing her legs apart even further now and he grabbed her hips and picked her up, slamming her into the glass and holding her there while he thrust into her and Irina started to scream with pleasure and he cupped his hand over her mouth, locking eyes with her.

"We have to be quiet Derevko." He kept thrusting into her as Irina hooked her leg over his hip. His hand let go of her mouth and found her wrists, pulling them over her head and holding them to the glass.

Irina was biting her lip so hard to keep from moaning loudly and screaming, she was starting to taste the metallic sting of blood as he pounded into her with such force her body slapped against the glass.

Jack's hand held her arms in place while the other one went to her ass and pulled her up higher as he drove into her with a frenzied pace. "I wanted to fuck you until you were begging me…" His dark eyes bore into hers as he grunted with his efforts, "You were so beautiful and it…was driving me mad…that I couldn't fuck you." His hips pumped furiously as his cock slid in and out of her drenched core, her muscles pulsating around him trying to keep him in side as he pulled out and plunged back in. "I wanted to pound you…into this glass. Holding you up…while mewed...in painful torture... as your body…screamed…for release."

Irina was panting as he drove faster and deeper inside when she arched out towards him.

"I wanted to hear…you beg me in your Russian…tongue…to push you... over the edge…something… I never heard you…do." Jack's hand crept up her body groping her breast beneath her bra, pushing it up, and running circles around her nipples with his thumb, flicking their glass peaks before his tongue assaulted her sensitive globes.

Irina couldn't catch her breath and a small trickle of blood appeared on her lower lip, arching towards him. "Fuck me…hard…" Irina gasped out in Russian between shaky breaths, "Agent Bristow…" Answering his dream's request and Jack moaned when she clenched deeply inside her.

His mouth left her breast and the cold air on her wet nipple left it painfully erect as his mouth sought hers once more and he tasted her blood and pounded into her again and again, a dull thud echoing off the glass every thrust. Moaning and groaning with pleasure into one another's mouths stifling the sounds of their pleasure

"Do you guys know where my Mom and Dad went?" Sydney scrunched her eyebrows walking up to Weiss, Sark and Vaughn having not found them anywhere she looked.

"No I haven't seen them anywhere." Vaughn shrugged his face and eyebrows making those cute wrinkles in his forehead. "But we have a meeting in few minutes, I'm sure they'll be there."

"I haven't seen them either," Weiss shrugged when she turned her gaze to him, "Hey…" He took a step towards the monitors, "I wonder why this one's turned off?"

Marshall had been a few feet away when he saw Weiss moving to turn on the monitor and his eyes flashed wide, running towards them, _"Noooooooooooo!"_ But it was too late.

The view of Irina's back pressed into the glass of the cell in only a bra, her skirt around her waist and Jack's hand holding her arms above her head while he stood in front of her, almost out of view pounding into her. It was quite obvious what they were doing.

"Holy fuck!" Weiss's eyes went wide with amusement and shock.

"Sweet mother of God!" Sark's eyes matched Weiss's his mouth hanging open.

In slow motion, Vaughn had seen a flash of it, yelled 'Holy shit!' at the same time that Sydney was turning her head to look at what the hell was wrong,

"Sydney, _no_!" He launched at her, covering her eyes with his hands as Marshall stood frozen, his chin on his chest, mouth wide open, his eyes locked onto the image in the cell.

Sydney tore Vaughn's hands away and was immediately assaulted with the image of her father fucking her mother up against the glass of her former cell. Her mouth opened in a silent scream in mortification as her face paled and she couldn't blink.

"Holy fuck!" Weiss repeated breaking into a huge grin as his eyebrows hit his hairline staring at the entire length of Irina's leg, bent slightly at the knee with her black heels on as Jack pounded her again.

"OH MY GOD!" Sydney managed finally in a strangled scream unable to move as her mother arched towards her father and he slammed her back into the glass.

"Ooh!" Weiss flinched seeing what must have been an audible thud, "See, this is why they should have had a honeymoon!" Weiss snapped out of his stun and smiled widely pointing to the monitor. "Newlyweds can't keep their hands off each other."

Vaughn quickly reached up and turned off the monitor.

"You can't tell Irina!" Marshall panicked grabbing onto Vaughn and Sydney's arms. "She told me to keep the monitor off for twenty minutes…if she finds out! I'm dead!" His forehead literally drenched with sweat in a period of seconds.

"You knew about this!" Sydney wheeled to face him all color gone from her face.

"Yes! Yes I did! I mean…she didn't come out and say but," Marshall started to hyperventilate. "She's very persuasive! She's going to kill me!"

"Now I'm seriously doubting that Jack only banged her in Panama while she was in our custody."Weiss laughed out loud and stifled it, when Vaughn elbowed him as people were starting to look at them.

"Oh my God!" Sydney covered her own eyes trying to stop the thoughts and instant replay of her father pounding her mother into the glass. She tried shaking her head but that only seemed to ingrain it more and suddenly she had visions of them in that pose on their kitchen table with her Cookie Monster painting under them.

"Hot damn! Do they have a smokin' sex life! Jack's got balls of steel!" Weiss couldn't help it and his body shook with internal laughter.

"Arrgh!" She screamed into her hands and everyone around the floor stopped what they were doing.

"Ahh…ahhh…ahhh!" Irina panted, her cries getting louder at his furious pace and Jack's face lit into a contorted smiled knowing she was about to fly. She just needed a push and his head dipped to her erect nipple again, closing his mouth over it completely, his teeth closing over the ridged flesh and she began to quiver.

He held his hand in front of her mouth, offering it to her and slowly, with his teeth racking into her flesh pulled back and she bit onto his hand as she screamed when her orgasm ripped through her body. Her body arching towards his as he continued to pound into her, abandoning her nipple as he watched her tremble with sweet ecstasy, her face contorted and her eyes screwed shut, biting painfully hard onto his hand drawing blood.

The sensations of pain and pleasure coursing through him simultaneously pushed him to the max and with two last big thrusts, pounding her into the glass harder then he ever had, exploded inside her screaming, "_Ahhhhhhh fuck!_" Out-loud and it echoed loudly around the cell with all the glass. He kept pumping as the stars exploded in brilliant patterns behind his eyes and he felt Irina still surging with her own orgasm.

Jack finally collapsed against her, releasing her arm and Irina released his hand, he wrapped his arms around her and she him as they trembled together trying to catch their breath.

"Moya Boga, Agent Bristow!" Irina panted in his ear with heavy Russian. "You really wanted to fucking pound me!" She knew she was going to have bruises from this little adventure and it was well worth it!

Jack lifted his face to hers, pressing their foreheads together. "Only because I loved you so much it hurt…I wanted to know what 'Irina Derevko' felt like, sounded like…if you didn't have to hold back anymore…the real you…"

"And what is your assessment Agent Bristow?" Irina reached her hands up to cup his face while they remained pressed together, her chest heaving with every breath as she felt him deflating and spasm inside her.

"That you're heaven and hell all rolled into one." He answered and she laughed that deep giggle he loved. His cock twitching inside her from the vibrations. "The best of both worlds. Perfect." He lifted his eyes to hers and smiled, capturing her lips in his once more.

"Oh shit! Jack, the meeting!" She suddenly pushed him back trying to find her footing as he still held her suspended.

"Fuck!" He helped her down and pulled out, pulling his pants back on and rapidly doing his buttons and buckle.

Irina was trying to pull her skirt back down and snickered when she looked at all the wrinkles it now possessed. Jack handed her the white blouse and helped her button it as fast as they could. He waited for her patiently as she tucked her shirt in and helped her into her jacket, giving each other the once over to make sure they were put back together properly.

Irina smiled and whirled on her heel when Jack caught her hand. "Wait a second." He pulled her close to him, smiling at her flushed face as he pulled her in for a slow, sweet kiss. "I love you Irina Derevko…Bristow." He smiled against her lips when she laughed.

"I love you too, Agent Bristow." She answered in Russian, so happy and still glowing from the sedation of their lovemaking. "Make them think you're still mad at me…remember you're the one that screamed, 'Oh fuck!" She laughed when his face suddenly fell as if he'd forgotten.

The guards eyed them carefully as they walked out and Jack replied tersely, "All worked out. Thank you."

* * *

"Where the hell are they?" Kendall looked annoyed at the two empty seats, and seeing all the smirks on Vaughn, Weiss and Sark's faces, they knew something.

"Shit…we're late." Irina took a deep breath seeing everyone assembled and waiting for them in the conference room.

"Sorry we're late." Jack held the door open for Irina as they walked into the room, "We had some unfinished business to take care of."

Both Weiss and Vaughn snorted trying not to laugh, and Sark pinched his lips as he covered his mouth, trying not to laugh.

'Unfinished business! Ha!' Weiss thought and his body shook with held in laughter.

Irina and Jack scanned the faces and reactions as they took their seats.

"Did you get 'her' done, Jack?" Weiss swallowed the laughter his eyes still held it.

"Excuse me?" Jack turned to him sharply and Sark and Vaughn snorted again biting their lips.

Irina's eyebrows shot up as her dark eyes pierced Weiss, wondering if they were just being paranoid.

"The unfinished business?" Weiss asked casually, covering his tracks.

"Yes. We did." Jack answered annoyed, feeling somewhat relieved until he looked over at Sydney, who burned bright red, and was avoiding all eye contact.

Irina saw it too and her eyes immediately went to Marshall who was rapidly chewing all of his fingernails like a rabbit on crack, sweating profusely and refusing to meet her eyes as well. Vaughn snorted loudly as his body shook when he looked at Jack's hand and saw the perfect teeth impressions that were already black and some bleeding. His eyes looked away quickly to Weiss and Sark, grabbing their attention and then bringing their' eyes to Jack's hand. Weiss's hand flew over his mouth laughing at Irina's dental impressions from what must have been her 'orgasmic clench' on Jack's hand between his fingers and thumb. Sark pursed his lips together forming a tight line trying not to laugh but his body was still shaking.

"What the hell is so God damn funny you three?" Kendall leaned over the end of the table staring down Weiss, Vaughn and Sark.

"There was another Siberian tiger attack this morning in one of the holding cells." Weiss tried to answer quickly without laughing but snorted loudly and so did Sark and Vaughn.

"What?" Kendall yelled, "What the hell are you talking about? What Siberian tiger? You keep talking about a Siberian tiger attacking…What the hell are you talking about?"

Jack's face flushed bright red with embarrassment seeing his hand.

"Nothing to worry about Kendall. Jack looked like he everything under control." Weiss added and the three of them lost it.

"Who?" Kendall and Dixon were both very confused.

"Just some wild animal wrangler called 'Panama Jack' that we all saw on live-television this morning." Weiss kept going digging his own grave as Jack's already flushed face burned bright red.

"Oh my God…" Sydney moaned and covered her face with her hands as she rested her elbows on the table and Marshall sank into his chair, turning away from Irina whom he could feel burning holes in the back of his head.

"Yes…and today he was conquering some famous Russian tiger in her former cage... and got bit." Weiss burned bright red from trying to hold back his laughter but lost it when Sark did followed by Vaughn.

Irina had to admit, that was funny…and she started to chuckle with them, though she tried not to.

"Oh just kill me now…" Sydney shook her head in her hands, totally horrified and yet somewhat amused.

Kendall and Dixon both realized this was some 'code' that everyone else was in on, and were both rapidly putting together the pieces of the puzzle, Kendall talking it out…

"Famous Russian tiger attacks, Panama Jack…in 'her' former cage…on live-television…she bit him…" His eyes went wide when he looked to Jack and Irina; Jack's hand had glaring teeth imprints. "The Siberian Russian tiger," He looked at Irina who chewed her lip bemused looking up at him with her enchanting dark eyes, "And Panama Jack," His eyes flew to Jack…his mind screaming, 'Panama! Panama! Panama Jack!' "In the cell…" Kendall shook his head and Dixon started cracking up with the other guys, "Unfinished business…huh 'Panama Jack?" Kendall tried to glare at him but was too highly amused himself to pull it off and the corners of his mouth twitched into a smile. "You two are absolutely certifiable!" He shook his head and took his seat, trying not to laugh.

"Oh come on Kendall…they are newlyweds." Weiss smiled innocently at the end of the table, hoping Jack wouldn't kill him and let wild boars feast on his flesh.

"Please don't kill me..." Marshall finally turned and begged Irina his fingernails bleeding from his nervous chewing. "I did what you asked, Irina, I shut the monitor off! 'He' turned it on for everyone to see!" Marshall quickly deflected the blame onto Weiss as he pointed his short arm down the table.

Jack's eyes went wide thinking the entire Ops. Floor had seen it.

"No nononono! Not everyone! Just Sark and Marshall, and Mike, myself and Sydney." Weiss's voice raised an octave feeling that he backed himself into a corner when Jack's horrified gaze went to Sydney. "And don't worry Jack…from the angle of the camera the way Irina was pressed against the glass she blocked most of your action." He was trying to make it better and was making it terribly worse instead, as everyone's eyes bulged out and their eyebrows skyrocketed. "Oh my God! I'm sorry…I meant no offense, more like 'Hell yeah! That was frickin' hot! More power to you guys…" He lifted his arm and clenched his hand into the 'power fist, "I'll just shut up now…" He cleared his throat and turned his eyes away from Jack and Irina.

"Can we please stop talking about this? Let's not make it a big deal, alright?" Sydney sighed rubbing her temples and finally met Irina's sympathetic gaze.

"Moving on!" Irina commanded, steering this ship away from the iceberg with a smile and a wink to Marshall who looked as though he were about to have a nervous breakdown.

'Oh Thank God she's not going to kill me…' Marshall sighed, relieved returning a nervous smile to Irina, falling in love with her all over again.

Sydney's thoughts short -circuiting to, 'Apparently I get the biting thing from Mom too.' And the corners of her frown began to turn up, trying not to laugh thinking about she and Vaughn.

'So Sydney has inherited her clawing and biting habits from Irina.' Vaughn smiled amused, knowing his sex life was going to be great for a long, long time if Sydney was so like 'her mother,' very active!

Once the embarrassment and anger passed, Jack actually found himself amused by being 'caught.' Something about showing those 'young punks how it's done' felt good and his smile returned and gradually grew wider the more he thought about. His hand found Irina's under the table and squeezed lightly, thumb running over her wedding rings and remembering that 'he was the luckiest man on Earth,' to have Irina as his wife…'she was just…everything.'

Irina smiled warmly feeling Jack's hand seek hers out under the table as Kendall talked about leads that had proved false. She felt so lucky to have Jack as her husband…'he was everything she wanted… and more.' Irina bit her lip as her breathing increased when he lightly traced the outline of her hands and fingers with one of his own, the softest of touches sending shivers up her arm with their electricity.

Kendall could tell by looking at Jack and Irina and the looks on their faces they hadn't heard a thing he said. Their electricity was pulsating around the room and his own thoughts drifted to Jack's comment on 'unfinished business,' which turned out to be mad sex with Irina in her former cell. He couldn't help but wonder if that had something to do with the day they spent almost 24 hours in their together going over the Ariana Kane files. He'd seen them on the monitors and could see the electrical current blazing through them on screen even. The way she would look at him when he wasn't looking, the way Jack would look at her when she wasn't looking…The way their eyes finally met and the searing gazes they shared.

The Unresolved Sexual Tension was obvious to everyone at the CIA from the moment of their' first encounter, something he also witnessed on the monitor. And apparently, in Panama…could no longer be denied, fear was pushed aside and they just let go. He had to chuckle to himself about that now. Jack was playing with fire…He knew, that UST had a great part in why Jack Bristow couldn't think clearly when it came to Irina Derevko. To know they took care of that 'unfinished business' amused him now that they were remarried. Leave it to Jack and Irina to 'tie-up-loose-ends' and take care of their' unfinished business.'

Weiss was thinking that if Jack and Irina were so active and happy in their sex life and Vaughn and Sydney were in theirs,' it had something to do with the women and he needed a Romanov/Derevko woman and he knew of just the one…His heart did a little happy dance thinking about Sophia and their 'Goodbye' kiss. He was going to call her in Milan tonight. He would be a fool to let a woman with obvious good genes get away. Their smiles, their laughs, their beauty and personalities, their incredible intelligence and caring, their passion and desire…He knew now, why Jack couldn't give up Irina after he learned what they 'thought' was the truth about her, and why Vaughn couldn't give up on Sydney even before they were dating when they had to deal with her status as a double-agent.

These women were intoxicating…addictive like a drug you never want to get off of. Now that he had a taste with Sophia, he was hooked.

Sark sat quietly looking around the table at all the various people and thinking about the fact that these people, minus Irina, all used to be his enemies and now here he was, sitting with them and enjoying their presence, sharing a new 'inside' joke with them.

For whatever embarrassment it might have caused the Bristow trio, the laughter and amusement over the situation had actually broken the ice for him. Apparently, it wasn't only life at home with Jack and Irina that was highly interesting and entertaining, but working with them both as well.

A soft rapt against the glass door stopped Kendall in his long-winded speech.

_***Love Theme of The Godfather***_

"Sorry to interrupt but…you told me to if your phone ever rang." Agent Crane came charging into the room carrying Irina's cell phone and a magazine. The phone was ringing and playing a beautiful yet powerful song as its ring. "I thought it might be important...Isn't that the _Love Theme_ from _The Godfather_?" The Agent's eyes looked amused as she listened more closely.

Everyone who was present at Christmas died with laughter remembering Weiss's reference of Irina to The Godfather.

Irina rolled her eyes laughing, "Agent Weiss!" She stood reaching for the phone as everyone began humming along really loudly.

Kendall, Sark, Dixon and Agent Crane didn't get it.

"Irina, I saw your phone in the baby bag this morning and I just 'had' to download it as your ring!" Weiss smiled laughing before going back to humming as everyone kept laughing and humming, getting louder.

"This just came in the Intel mail too…" Crane set the Russian magazine in front of Irina.

The young woman's eyes lit up staring at its cover with Irina and Sydney, having been fascinated by the enigma that was Irina from the moment she met with her at the debriefing. Now she was the Russian Tsar…

Irina smiled happily at the cover and shook her head laughing that they were all still humming and smiled as she answered the phone speaking in Russian when she exited the room.

"Would someone care to explain to me what is the reference between Irina and the Love Theme to The Godfather?" Kendall looked around at all the laughing faces even Jack's was smiling.

"Sophia had no idea who 'the Man' was, she didn't know that side of Mom's life… Eric tried explaining it to her Christmas." Sydney was smiling and giggling with her cute dimples firmly in place. "He basically told Sophia that Mom was the equivalent of The Godfather and scared the be-jeezus out of her!" Everyone started laughing. "I told Mom when we got there what Eric had said, so she knew what to expect from Sophia, but no one else knew that. Mom got her payback by telling Eric, he had to kiss her hand when he greeted her if she was The Godfather and we all died of laughter seeing Eric's face turn red!"

"You always seem to put your foot in your mouth Agent Weiss." Kendall's eyes danced with laughter.

"Only around Irina apparently." He blushed smiling.

"What's on this cover Jack?" He nodded his head at the magazine.

Jack sighed, picking up the magazine and smiled at the faces that greeted him.

"It's about the 'Legacy of the Romanov Women." He paused smiling at different photos, including one of his old favorites. "Anastasia and Irina as a baby, and Irina with Sydney as a baby and then last weekend."

"Oh I've got to see that! Can I please see that?" Weiss asked him excitedly.

Jack slid the magazine across the table.

"Aww Syd as baby, you're so cute!" He laughed as Vaughn and Sark leaned in to look as well. "Your hair went blonde?"

"Only for about six months." Jack smiled thinking about those days, "My hair did the same when I was a baby."

Sydney smiled brightly at her father, never knowing that detail.

"Wow! That's 'Anastasia' and Irina?!" Weiss narrowed his eyebrows looking at the photo and then to Jack who was nodding. "Holy cow! I thought it was another picture of Syd and Irina…Anastasia looks 'exactly' like Irina there!"

"That's really kind of freaky just how much…and Irina as a baby, looks like exactly like Sydney as a baby. Both pretty cute…" Vaughn looked at the photo and then to his fiancé with a big smile.

Weiss slid the magazine down for Sydney, Marshall and Kendall to see, smiles coming to all their faces.

"How'd they get that photo?" Sydney's eyebrows shot up seeing she and her mother when she was a baby, "I burned it." Her tone was sad as she furrowed her eyebrows, tears started forming in her eyes, "After, when I found out she was KGB, I burned everything."

"Your mother must have had a copy." Jack added softly, giving her a small smile remembering how painful it had been to tell Sydney about her mother then.

Irina came bounding through the door the moment after, eyes wide.

"That was Dubey." Her smile started to widen, "He's found Zamir."


	43. Chapter 43

**_AN: Music really is a MUST for this chapter! REALLY! It's SO much more FUN with it as it's timed perfectly! :)_**

**_(on repeat): Guitarria by Benise, Porche Boost by Trevor Rabin from Gone in 60 Seconds Soundtrack , Speedballin' by Outkast, Sinnerman by Nina Simone and Unbelievable by EMF_**

* * *

FORTY-THREE

o

_***Guitarria***_

_Seville, Spain_

"Marshall, I need the visual now!" Jack grew impatient through the Com from white catering van outside the beautiful three story lavish mansion.

"Working on it Mr. Bristow." Marshall pounded furiously at his keyboard back at Ops, hacking into the security company in Madrid hired to secure the estate in Seville.

Kendall stood over him hands on hips, brows furrowed.

"I'm in!" Marshall smiled excitedly as various rooms and exteriors of the mansion showed up on various screens through both his and Jack's computers.

"Mountaineer, Boy Scout do you have a visual on the target?" Jack's eyes scanned the screens looking at Sydney and Vaughn watching the dancers as guests of the party joined in.

Zamir's mother was Spanish and his sister was holding an engagement party tonight in their family's massive home. Being the loyal brother that he was, Zamir wouldn't miss it according to Dubey.

Sydney and Vaughn glanced around the crowded room, observing the elevated dance floor where beautiful flamenco dancers were entertaining the guests of the party.

Sydney's hair had been straightened and died dark black; as well as Vaughn's. Her deep crimson dress hugged all the right curves as she sat on a bar stool adjacent from Vaughn, legs crossed and exposing dangerous amounts of skin. They looked the part of a young wealthy Spanish couple.

"Affirmative," Sydney whispered into her Com as she turned her head gazing at the dark haired man smiling on the other side of the room kissing a woman's hand.

"Remember we want to take this bastard alive. He can answer more questions then the ones we need about Sloane with his ties to Al-Quada." Kendall huffed into his own Com leaning down with one arm on the desk, and the other on the back of Marshall's chair.

Irina accepted the handsome young valet's hand as he helped her step out of her little silver Audi convertible with a smile. "Thank-you." She flashed him her seductive eyes, speaking in flawless Castilian Spanish.

"Siberian Tiger's on the move." Weiss breathed into his come with a smile from across the room as he saw Irina coming through the main foyer.

Sark's eyes lit up in amusement and a smug smile crossed his face sitting next to Jack in the van, seeing the older man roll his eyes at Irina's new code name from the CIA. Dixon waiting with them as back-up cracked a smile as well, shaking his head.

Sydney and Vaughn turned slightly as all eyes watched Irina cross the floor. Her long dark hair swayed with her movement. Her black eyes intent and focused as she grabbed a flute of champagne and zeroed in on Zamir.

The brilliant red dress was to die for and made people take a second glance at her body, keeping their minds off her now recognizable face. The material, stretchable and fit Irina's body like, a glove. The front was a halter top that held the dress up around her neck and then split into two separate pieces of fabric that covered her breasts, but left a deep slit down the front exposing her torso to the middle of her body. The long scar down the middle of her chest, covered by clever make-up, the two pieces of fabric met, reconnecting and flowing into a one piece skirt that had a massive slit up her left thigh, exposing her sexy legs that Jack loved. A Spanish ruffle trimmed the hemline, making it dance as she walked. Her red sandal high-heels exposing her toes, painted the same color red. She was a vision to behold and Jack swallowed hard watching her glide gracefully through the crowd.

Irina's heart began beating rapidly in the chest at being back in the field again and she sipped her champagne taking in her surroundings, noting exits, security detail members mixed among the crowd and her own team members locations. Her eyes flashed with opportunity as she saw Zamir take the dance floor with the beautiful Spanish men and women. Every thirty seconds or so, the couples switched partners in their fast paced dance resembling the tango and she smiled watching for a few seconds to learn the steps, downing the rest of her champagne and slipping through the crowd. Without saying a word, Irina grabbed the hand of a beautiful man and swirled him onto the dance floor as her partner in one fluid motion. His eyes lit with wonder and surprise as she took him firmly in her arms and he immediately began the dance with her, amazed with his luck.

"She's good." Weiss whispered with delight seeing how quickly Irina had picked up the dance and was immediately absorbed into her partner and their moves.

The man's body pressed tightly into hers', his hands splayed across her lower back keeping her there as their feet flew a rapid pace in spins twirls and dips.

"You have no idea…" Sark cocked his eyebrow with a smile, responding to Weiss as they watched her dancing on the monitor in the van.

Jack's own heart began pounding hearing Sark's comment and seeing another man dancing that intimately with his wife but remaining calm, remembering their purpose…and the dance was supposed to be mimicking the intimate acts between a man and a woman. Irina was playing her part…very well. He couldn't wait to grab hold of her and kiss her on the mouth having not seen her in this dress before hand.

Irina's eyes entertained her partners but kept close tabs on Zamir's exact position on the floor, lining herself up to be his next partner and right as she breezed by him, the partners switched and she spun into his arms. Zamir's eyes bulged in surprise.

"Hello Zamir." Irina greeted him in Spanish as her eyes gleamed dangerously. The man momentarily hesitated in his steps but quickly recovered, forcefully grabbing Irina's body, slamming it into his as his eyes raked in her body.

"Senorita Derevko," His eyes smiled as his face maintained its seriousness, studying her intently. His own heart pounding rapidly in his chest and not from dancing, Irina could feel it's pace increase with her thumb on his wrist as she held his hand.

"We need to talk." Irina maintained in Spanish as they flew rapidly around the dance floor and he suddenly dipped her far back, heaving her chest towards the ceiling and letting her shoulders and head drop, her hair swaying as he pulled her upright immediately.

The man was equal parts turned on and anxious about his beautiful companion. "Your message would suggest we have nothing further to discuss." His eyes turned dark and his hand slid roughly down her backside grabbing her ass and pummeling his groin into her.

"Son of a bitch!" Jack hissed under his breath watching the man and everyone heard his reaction on their' Coms.

"Easy Jack." Kendall shifted positions intrigued with Irina's performance in the field as every one else.

"She's going to kill him…" Sydney sipped on her champagne as she watched her mother a few feet from her.

"We have plenty to discuss." Irina returned the sharp gaze before the man dipped her again and this time bent over and placed a hot open mouthed kiss on the skin of her sternum between her heaving breasts before whipping her back up and her eyes had turned black with rage, though she maintained the dangerous smile.

"I'm going to kill him…" Jack clenched his hands into tight fists as his eyes narrowed.

"Such as?" Zamir played coy, rubbing himself into Irina as his eyes locked onto hers, grasping Irina's exposed thigh as he brought her leg up to his hip and dipped her to the side.

Sark and Dixon looked to Jack whose knuckles had turned white and his face bright red in anger over the man fondling his 'wife.'

"Arvin Sloane for starters…and your involvement in my kidnapping." Her tone was dangerous and he saw the homicidal look in her eyes that her smile was trying to cover. "We can leave peacefully…or we can make a scene." She whispered dangerously, her hand feeling the gun in the back of his pants beneath his jacket. "You choose."

Zamir dipped her rapidly again, making her arch further back almost bent in half and his tongue once again assaulted her hot flesh. His eyes taking the opportunity to assess his escape options.

"Did you see that? Did you see that?" Weiss noticed the man's eyes darting around while he had Irina dipped.

"Yeah we saw it. He's looking for a way out." Vaughn whispered back, putting his drink down and casually moving his hand to his side where his gun was. He watched as Zamir swooped Irina back up.

"Move in. They're about to switch partners and Irina didn't see him looking for the out…" Jack felt his blood pressure rising.

"She knows. He held her down a few seconds longer the last time. Believe me she knows." Sark looked to Jack knowing from his own experience working with Irina. "Just give her a minute."

Zamir's eyes darted briefly to the open balcony and then back to Irina's just before switching partners and he bolted from the dance floor, and Weiss, Sydney, Vaughn and Irina jumped up after him. Irina was the closest and began pushing her way through the people in pursuit.

"God damn it!" Jack and Kendall both voiced together.

Zamir whipped the gun out from under his jacket and swung his shoulder back firing at Irina. She had anticipated it and ducked out of its way. People started screaming as the blood began pouring out of the man behind her. Dixon flew out of the back of the van and headed for the other side of the house to intercept him. Zamir hesitated for a second before launching himself over the stone railing of the second story balcony freefalling into the bushes below, rolling violently off and into the ground.

"Oh no…She's not going to-" Jack stood immediately watching as Irina's speed didn't decrease as she went out onto the large balcony.

"Oh yes she is!" Sydney watched wide-eyed and horrified, running behind her with the guards shooting at them as Irina went flying over the balcony after him in her heels and dress.

"Oh shit!" Irina breathed out in Russian, mid-air before landing on the top of the white tent set up below and bounced into the air landing again on the tent and rolling off the top onto the grass below as more people screamed and ran in every direction.

Jack waited with baited breath to see if she got up watching the entire thing on the screen.

"Fuck!" She screamed landing on her shoulder before jumping to her feet seeing Zamir tearing across the large lawn towards the parked cars.

"Cut him off! Cut him off!" Jack screamed into the Com at the others in hot pursuit of Zamir. Sydney and Vaughn had flown down the staircase, ducking and hiding as the guards fired off rounds chasing them.

Zamir was screaming at the valet before he got there, pushing people violently out of the way looking over his shoulder every few seconds to see if Irina was still behind him. A couple had just pulled up in a black Porsche convertible and he grabbed the valet out of the drivers seat and threw him to the ground, flooring the gas as its owners screamed at the man stealing their car.

"Son of a bitch! He stole a car!" Kendall yelled feeling his blood pressure rising watching the monitors and Marshall nervously chewed his fingernail.

Irina saw a guard about to intercept her and pulled the outside of her dress up retrieving the stiletto there. Without slowing her pace she fired her arm and hit the man square in the heart as his arm was raised, gun pointed at her and fired. He clutched his chest as he fell to his knees and Irina dove headfirst and rolled to avoid the bullet landing on her feet again. Jack's heart was pounding in his chest and a thin layer of sweat formed on his brow as he watched her rolling to avoid the hit.

Irina flew by the guard on his knees with blood pumping out of his chest turning his shirt red and forcefully grabbed her favorite knife out of his chest and stole his gun.

_***Porsche Boost***_

"Move! Move! Move!" She yelled in Spanish at the people in front of her, pushing them aside she grabbed a young man off his red Ducati motorcycle, throwing him to the ground and reviving the engine, spinning out on the white gravel as she fired up the bike and took off after Zamir. She was not letting this ass and her one chance to find Sloane get away!

"Boy Scout, Mountaineer get to the front!" Jack yelled as Sark jumped in the driver's seat and Dixon dove into the open doors of the back as Sark floored the van, making a tight U-turn to follow Irina. "God damnit! She doesn't have a helmet on!" Jack cursed under his breath watching his wife fly at a breakneck pace around several cars at close distances causing the gravel to spray out as her tires threw the stones when she rocked from side to side turning dangerously.

Vaughn and Sydney flew over the railing of the staircase to the other side and ran down the last few steps meeting Weiss at the bottom and charging out the door as a guard stepped in front of them firing rapidly and Sydney dove towards the floor, rolling and kicking his feet out from under him. His hand lost the gun and the both scrambled for it. Vaughn recovered and saw the man about to reach the gun first and dove to the floor grabbing it just seconds before the man did. Sydney rolled over and on top of the guard violently crashing her elbow into his head and knocking him out. Weiss grabbed her arm and pulled her up as the three of them ran outside.

They saw Irina tear out ahead of them on the bike as people helped up the man she had thrown to the ground and then rapidly made the decision to do the same, spotting a silver BMW convertible that the valet had just retrieved.

"Get out! Get out! Get out! Get out!" Sydney yelled at the young man in Spanish, yanking on his arm and sliding into the drivers seat as Weiss and Vaughn threw themselves over the side with Weiss in the back and Vaughn in the front passenger side, his legs still hanging over the side as Sydney tore out after her mother in pursuit of Zamir.

_***Speedballin'***_

Irina's hair wiping in the wind behind her she caught sight of the black Porsche several hundred feet in front of her pulling onto a busy street in Seville.

"Marshall, switch to satellite now!" Jack yelled when he lost sight of Irina and Zamir when they left the security camera's range. "Casa Rosada Boulevard!"

"On it!" Marshall yelled as his fingers furiously struck the keyboard, tasking a satellite to pick them up. "Got him!" He yelled when he saw the satellite zooming into the street with the black Porsche weaving in and out of traffic dangerously.

Jack's eyes searching the screen for Irina as he swayed back and forth, grabbing the table as Sark drove wildly to catch up. "There she is!" His finger hit the screen spotting Irina zigging and zagging around several cars crossing lanes of traffic as she slowly inched toward the black car.

Irina saw Zamir was about to run a red light and knew she'd had to as well, there was no way to slow down at her speed and she couldn't lose him. She pulled back full throttle as she straddled the buzzing bike beneath her. The ruffles on her skirt flapping wildly in the wind and ripping back the slit exposing her entire leg.

Zamir flew through the cross street and caused two cars to violently slam into one another in front of her, with cat like reflexes she flew to the right just missing the bumper of the crashed car. She heard a loud horn somewhere lost in the wind and flew just seconds ahead of being hit by a delivery truck.

"Jeezus!" Jack's heart lurched out of his chest watching Irina narrowly missing the accident and getting hit by the truck. "Get on the phone and tell the Seville police that we are in hot pursuit of a wanted terrorist! Get some control over those lights before she kills herself chasing the crazy bastard through intersections!" Jack yelled into his headset and Dixon pulled himself up and grabbed a cell phone.

"Holy shit!" Weiss screamed from the back seat as they watched Irina narrowly missing the crash and truck. "She's crazy! Look at her go!" His eyes widened with excitement as he flew violently around in the backseat with every slight turn of the wheel at their speed.

Sydney and company went flying through exit about thirty seconds after Irina, revving the engine at full speed straight at the gathering crowd and sending them running to get the hell out of her way.

Irina felt the surge of new adrenaline narrowly escaping death once again and crouched down further to pick up speed as she began gaining on Zamir. He saw her catching up to him in the rear-view mirror and swerved drastically jumping the median of the oncoming traffic as horns blared and cars smashed into one another.

"Motherfucker!" Irina hissed under her breath and followed, the bike gaining some air as she flew over the little curb and a leaned harshly to her right sliding right by a small yellow car screaming its horn at her.

"He's suicidal!" Vaughn screamed over the wind and Sydney started gaining on Irina running almost parallel to her on the opposite side of the boulevard.

Sark had caught up to them in the van and was hot on Sydney's bumper. The scream of police sirens alerted them to the fact that the police had arrived but didn't know who to chase so began chasing all of them. One car after another slid into each other as Zamir increased his speed weaving in and out of traffic trying to get to the highway.

"You're not getting away from me you bastard!" Irina let go carefully with one hand and fired the bullet narrowly missing Zamirs head and purposely breaking the wind-shield temporarily causing him to lose control.

"Jeezus, Irina!" Jack gasped watching her let go with one hand to fire at Zamir's car. She was perfection in action but scared the living shit out of him at the same time! "Sydney floor it and make a sharp right onto the curving street ahead, it curves around and intersects the boulevard again! There are less cars there, you can get ahead of him and cut his ass off!" Jack said rapidly seeing the opening street on the satellite footage.

"I'm on it!" She flew across the three lanes of traffic sending cars spinning out of control and hit the brake and gas at the same time flying around the corner and slamming their bodies against the doors of the car with the momentum.

"Ahhhh!" All three of them screamed at the same time as the car fishtailed and finally found its grip again. The street did have less cars and Sydney pushed the car past 125 miles per hour with her black hair flying wildly behind her, a determined look on her face with scrunched eyebrows.

Jack grabbed the laptop and flew to the front of the van with Sark realizing they were near parallel with Irina and Zamir now. He glanced to his left and saw Irina hunched over on her speed bike, looking sexy as hell with her hair flying in the wind, in that revealing red dress with her skirt flying up behind her exposing those legs he loved. Some of the police now jumping the boulevard pursuing her with lights flashing and sirens blaring. He turned his head back and watched on the screen of satellite footage of Zamir, Irina and Sydney's positions nearing the intersection and wishing Irina had an earpiece to tell her what they were trying to do though he guessed she probably knew seeing Sydney veer off.

"Son of bitch!" Jack fumed watching as Zamir was purposely trying to lead Irina into on coming cars, driving straight at them as she was right behind him and then veering last second in a dangerous game of 'chicken' with them, hoping Irina wouldn't follow and get hit head on. Thankfully she was onto him.

Suddenly Zamir reached his arm over the back of the seat semi-turning his body and fired at Irina.

"Motherfucker!" She screamed into the wind as the bullet grazed her right arm just below the shoulder.

"Syd the intersection!" Vaughn pointed wildly in front of them seeing all the braking lights as the police had stopped all cross traffic at the intersections now.

**_*Sinnerman*_**

"Sydney you're just ahead of them!" Jack shouted into his earpiece looking rapidly from the screen to his left and right in front of them. "It's going to be close!" His heart was seizing at 'how' close and hoped that Sydney didn't get slammed into.

Zamir was headed straight into a small blue car still trying to loose Irina when he saw the sliver car flying just ahead of him, coming from the right intersection ahead.

"Fuck!" He shouted and other obscenities in Arabic and Spanish.

Seeing Irina was literally a few feet behind him now and the other car about to cut him off he slammed his foot to the floor pushing the car past 135 miles per hour.

"Oh my God!" Everyone screamed at the same time when Zamir's car dodged the tiny blue car last second, getting ahead of Sydney's interception as she came flying through the intersection and just missed ramming the side of the blue car.

"Oh dear God!" Irina inhaled sharply seeing she was about to hit head-on with the car in front of her and in what seemed liked slow motion, everyone watched as she pulled back sharply on the bike's handle bars, gunning it vertical onto the back tire and ramped up the hood of the tiny blue car and over it sending the bike flying through the air and over the little silver convertible carrying Sydney, Vaughn and Weiss who were screaming as Irina and the bike soared over the top of them.

Sark's eyes bulged out, having her seen do crazy shit like this before but still stunningly insane every time and Jack went pale grabbing his head his hands as he watched Irina soaring on the motorcycle over the blue car and over Sydney's car that was trying to intercept…Irina at least 20 feet off the ground.

Irina pushed with her heels extending her legs slightly and pushing the bike forward some in the air, continuing to pull back on the front knowing she had to hit the pavement with the back wheel first or die as the bike flipped end over end.

She saw Sydney's car beneath her, as time seemed to stand still for those few seconds and the horror on the faces below her before her mind snapped back to the task at hand.

The ground approaching rapidly, she cranked her wrist back accelerating the bike as fast as it would go and bent her knees preparing for impact. With a sudden jolt her back tire hit and she leaned forward accelerating through her landing until her front wheel was on the ground too. She exhaled violently the breath she'd been holding and finally smiled realizing she'd made it in one piece and sped up, tearing on after Zamir.

"Holy fucking aye!" Weiss screamed out in awe watching with the rest of them as Irina landed and kept on going.

"Yeah!" He screamed pumping his fist into the air. "You fucking go! You bad-ass! Wahoo Irina!"

Sydney finally snapped out of it floored the car again and turned sharply, following pursuit again.

"Did you see that!? Did you just see that?" Weiss screamed excitedly hitting Vaughn's shoulder with his hand, as they couldn't believe they just saw, what they saw.

"Holy Mother of Mary!" Kendall finally exhaled having held his breath along with the rest of the crowd gathered at Ops watching the car chase. "I can't believe she made that!" He gasped turning white.

"Oh dear God!" Jack gasped clutching his hand to his heart with a mix of emotions. He was scared, and angry and elated and proud! "Sweet Jesus! She's insane!"

"She is rather remarkable." Sark shrugged with a smile. "She can do some pretty amazing things on a motorcycle."

"She's done this kind of thing before?" Jack's eyes went wide as they continued to tear up the street after them. Seeing Sark's amused look he screamed, "Wait! Don't answer that. I don't want to know what kind of insanity she's pulled and survived!"

So far today she'd done a number of them starting by jumping over a two story balcony into a tent…

"Oh you're mine now bastard!" Irina's eyes started watering from the wind and she crouched lower pushing the bike past 155 miles per hour.

They watched with baited breath on the satellite images as Irina's red body and bike moved at breakneck pace rapidly catching up to Zamir as she continued to weave through the oncoming traffic.

Steadily she held the bike with one hand again and aimed, firing at the back tire and successfully blowing it causing Zamir to swerve.

He was forced to slow and she was gaining on him fired again and took out the other back tire causing his car to fishtail wildly and slow rapidly until is went sideways and came to a sudden halt. Irina pressed hard onto the breaks and whipped her body weight to the side, her hair flying in cascades with the motion, sliding the bike sideways for almost a hundred feet on its tires before stopping. She pointed her gun at him as she continued straddling the bike 20 feet in front of Zamir and Sark with the van and Sydney in the car came flying up beside and behind them, blocking them in and his chance at escape as he stood gun in hand outside car.

"End of the road asshole!" Irina screamed at Zamir in Spanish as the police surrounded them all with guns pointed at Irina and Zamir as they were the ones with guns drawn on each other.

Jack started screaming 'CIA' with Vaughn, Dixon, Weiss, Sydney and himself holding up their badges for the police to see ordering them not to shoot anyone.

The policemen's eyes were wide in surprise and astonishment from having witnessed the incredible woman on the bike make the jump and slide into her stop.

"You're still a crazy bitch!" Zamir shook his head with a smile scanning her body and the entire length of her exposed leg, rapidly raising his gun to shoot Irina and her trigger finger was faster shooting the gun right out of his hand, leaving him screaming in pain and cursing loudly at her as she just sat on her red motorcycle, wild hair and smiling with dark eyes.

Dixon and Weiss with guns drawn rapidly approached Zamir and shoved him to the ground, cuffing his hands behind his back and kneeing him painfully into the pavement as his hand bled all over.

Irina waited to lower her gun until she was certain they had secured him.

_***Unbelievable***_

The Spanish police started whistling and cheering loudly, applauding for Irina in awe.

She used her red heel to kick back the stand and sat the bike upright again smiling and shaking her head listening to everyone as she flung her leg over the bike and turned to meet Jack and Sydney staring at her wide-eyed.

Slowly and with swaying hips for her audience she smiled her famous grin and walked toward her husband and daughter.

"That was fun." She smiled brightly at the look on Jack's face and then broke into giggles coming to stand before him, inches from him. His eyes roaming her body in the dress that was now his favorite.

"Mom…that was…totally insane! You're unbelievable!" Sydney went from shock and awe to all smiles laughing hysterically. "You're bleeding!" She suddenly noticed the blood running down her mother's arm.

"It's nothing." Irina smiled speaking softly and shrugging not even looking at the wound. "Just a graze."

Jack's eyebrows narrowed momentarily seeing the wound and then met her smiling eyes. "You almost gave me a heart-attack!"

"I'm sorry." She laughed, placing her hand on his chest, "Jack…I had little choice. It was try and jump it or die in a head on collision. I've done it once before…ramping off another car so it was worth a shot…" She gave him her best puppy dog eyes still smiling until she saw him take a deep breath and break into a small smile.

He grabbed her face with both hands, kissing her forcefully as more cheers went up. His tongue claiming her mouth in a short but intense kiss as the adrenaline still surged through their bodies, thanking 'God' she was still alive.

"I love you…my crazy wife!" He whispered into her face, relieved and she rubbed their noses together.

"Mom you have to teach me how to do that!" Sydney's eyes were wide with fascination and excitement, as the image of her mother on a motorcycle flying over her in a red dress would forever be imprinted in her mind.

"For what Sydney?" Irina's smile remained but her eyes were serious as she took hold of her daughter's arm and cupped her face. "You are leaving this life after we get Sloane, right?"

Sydney's face scrunched in disappointment. "Well yeah…but can't you still teach me?!"

Her mischievous smile returned and Jack rolled his eyes when Irina laughed and nodded.

"Not off cars!" She cupped Sydney's face with a serious face, before smiling. "But I suppose it wouldn't hurt to teach you how to jump them off ramps or something."

"Irina that was kick-ass!" Weiss came up with an enormous smile after securing Zamir, hugging her tightly with her arms to her body and making her wince from her wound.

"Stop that!" Sydney hit him with her hand seeing the look flash across her Mom's face. "She's been shot and your squeezing her!"

"Oh I'm sorry!" Weiss immediately released and saw the blood on her arm and now on his jacket sleeve. "I was just so flippin' excited after seeing you fly over us and land…I'm buzzing with adrenaline." He gave her an apologetic smile. "I've never seen 'anyone' ramp a motorcycle off a car, over another one and land it and keep going! That was just so kick-ass!"

Irina chuckled seeing how excited they were and had to admit it felt 'really good' to be back in the action…part of her was certainly going to miss it when she gave it up. But…she couldn't be a spy forever and her family was more important.

"You should have seen her when she ramped a motorbike off the roof of a 10 story building in Tokyo, onto the roof of the neighboring building, thirty feet away, when we were chasing a member of the Japanese Akuza who'd crossed us." Sark's eyes danced with sparkle as he gave her that little tight smile of his and everyone else looked at her in surprise.

"You ramped a motorcycle from one building to another?" Sydney's mouth hung open in awe, having done some crazy shit herself in her life but nothing like what it sounds her mother had been doing.

"I couldn't let him get away." Irina shrugged with a smile and Jack sighed, rolling his eyes and thanking 'God' she survived the last 20 years to make it back to him.

"That's it! We all have to go out for drinks after that insane chase!" Weiss declared with a serious tone then smiled at Irina breaking into a laugh clapping his hands, "That was so…fucking unbelievable! God woman you're insane! Now I know where Syd gets it!" He kept laughing, "She shoots out windows of 747s so they crash and jumps out with her parachute barely on and you ramp motorcycle off cars at over a 155 miles per hour!"

"With no helmet!" Jack scorned her with his eyebrows and everybody laughed.

"Sweetheart, there wasn't exactly time to steal his bike and his helmet." Irina laughed and her body shook, leaning over she kissed Jack's cheek, lacing their fingers. "Now…I would love a drink but I want to question Zamir first."

"No can do." Dixon walked up with a disappointed shrug. "Politics. Since Zamir is a wanted member of Al-Quada and apprehended in Spain, Spanish officials are booking him first. I just spoke with Kendall, and he said we can't see him until tomorrow morning at 11am."

Irina's eyebrows furrowed in disappointment. She knew how the politics of this situation went but she was anxious to find Sloane.

"Hey don't look so glum, chum." Weiss nudged her with a smile as they walked to the van, "You caught the bad guy. Now…let's go have that drink!"

"I have to stop and see my baby first!" Irina smiled warmly, missing her little girl already. She'd been left in the care of Carrie, 4 CIA agents and 4 Russian SVR agents…no one, was going to steal that baby out of their hotel room.

"And stitch your arm up." Jack looked at her arm, and grabbed a roll of gauze wrapping her arm.


	44. Chapter 44

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Bambaleo and Baila Me by the Gypsy Kings, Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman by Brian Adams**_

* * *

FORTY-FOUR

o

"I just need to shower and change quick, then I'll be ready." Irina smiled warmly at Jack, kissing his lips quickly as she stood next to where he sat on the large bed in their suite, watching a sleeping Lena in the basket on the bed.

Irina had come home and nursed the baby as Jack had sewn up her arm and now was sound asleep for at least the next four hours. They'd let the agents go for a half hour to get something for dinner before they left and Jack had just finished stitching up her arm carefully.

Jack caught her hand and pulled her to him, "No…don't shower, don't change."

Irina furrowed her brow in confusion. "Jack…I jumped off a balcony and rolled onto the grass…I have grass in my hair." She laughed, pulling a single green blade. "Not to mention Zamir slobbered on my chest…I need to shower and change."

"No…please." His eyes begged her and then roamed over her body as his face came with in inches of the exposed skin of her chest and torso through the slit in the front of her dress. His fingers moving up to lightly trace her soft skin between the pieces of red fabric. He looked up into her face with her wild eyes and hair. She looked absolutely beautiful and incredibly sexy. "This is my new favorite dress." He waggled his eyebrows as his hand moved to her thigh exposed through the leg slit. "You look…amazing. Incredible. Gorgeous. Fantastic. Brilliant. Wild and crazy sexy!" His hand snaked around the back of her thigh and went under the dress to cup her ass. "Just like in Bangkok… seeing you in action…I can't help it…You're so crazy beautiful! I want you…now, in this dress…"

Irina was smiling madly at her husband as she looked down into his eyes, taking a step closer so she was standing between his legs. Jack's fingers began curling around the back of her thigh creeping between her legs.

"Thank you…Jack as much as I would love to make love with you right now on my adrenaline rush…because I can only imagine how explosive that would be," She smiled with her eyes and licked her lips feeling his hand creeping closer and making her breathing pick up, "But we don't time…the kids are going to be back here in a few minutes to meet us."

"Irina…" Jack shifted uncomfortable with his growing erection at just the mere sight of her and remembering her earlier in the day. "We have time…we'll make it real quick…it might be that way anyway since I am so excited to get inside you…" He said seriously, brushing his other hand over her flat abdomen. "Please!" He begged dramatically and she laughed hysterically.

"Ok…" She bent over, capturing his lips with a hot kiss. "But I am washing his slobber off my chest before I let you touch me." She kissed him again quick, feeling her own passion building and headed straight for the bathroom.

Jack sat for about 30 seconds on the bed and couldn't wait anymore, with great effort with his painfully hard cock pressed against his pants he went into the bathroom with her. His breath caught when he stood in the doorway looking at her reflection in the mirror.

Irina was standing in front of the mirror with a washcloth wiping down the center of her chest, washing away Zamir's germs but the motion suddenly seemed very erotic to Jack.

"You couldn't wait for me out there?" Irina smiled in the mirror back at his reflection, watching as Jack closed the door.

"No. I've got to have you now." His eyes glazed over with passion walking up behind her and encircling her with his arms from behind, holding her against him as they looked at one another in the mirror. "God, I love you…" He nuzzled his face into her hair, taking in the smell of the wind, his body absorbing her curves.

"Mom…Dad?" Sydney called from the living room of the suite and they both sighed, Irina smiling and laughing softly as Jack groaned into her hair. "Hello…where are you guys? You're not doing anything I wouldn't do now are you?" She asked in sing-song voice and they heard Vaughn and the others laughing softly behind her.

Irina laughed harder in Jack's arms at her daughter's humor and Jack felt himself deflating hearing Sydney's voice. "Later." Irina turned her face back to meet his, reaching up with one hand to bring his mouth down to hers, kissing him with a smile.

"I'm holding you to that!" Jack sighed, "I'll be out in a minute…I have to wait for 'Panama Jack' to settle down." He said seriously and Irina laughed out loud.

"Mom!" Sydney called louder having heard Irina's laughter.

Irina grabbed her hairbrush and exited the bathroom with a smile, brushing the grass and tangles out of her long wild mane.

"Hello." She greeted them all with a big smile and they were all looking at her like she did something naughty.

"Where's Dad?" Sydney cocked her eyebrow at her mother and Irina laughed.

"He's in the bathroom. He'll be out in a minute." She smiled stroking her long hair over one shoulder and then the other while they watched her every move.

"He sewed up your arm?" Sydney walked over to peek at her sister sleeping and smiled, turning to Irina seeing the white gauze around Irina's upper arm.

"Yes. He did. Perfect little stitches." Irina continued to smile as she pricked her finger and tested her blood sugar. "I'm hungry, how about you guys?" She smiled as they all watched with a sudden flash of sadness remembering her Execution vividly and the reason she now had to go through this ordeal.

"Starved." Vaughn smiled, warmly as they all stood around with hands in their pockets, watching her.

Irina bent her knee slightly, pushing her leg through the Spanish ruffle slit in her dress and exposing quite a bit of thigh to inject herself and Weiss gulped remembering seeing that leg just yesterday on the Ops monitor while she and Jack took care of their 'unfinished business.' Dixon had to look away, the woman was making him dizzy. He tried to tell himself it was because he didn't like needles but he knew that was a lie.

"I know a great restaurant not far from here if that's ok with everyone? They have some of the best authentic Spanish food I've encountered while in Spain. It's fantastic." She smiled brightly, putting her supplies back in the little black bag.

"I would have to agree, its one of my favorites as well. Definitely the best in Spain and we've tried many." Sark returned the brilliant smile and Sydney's eyes furrowed for a moment in jealousy.

She took a deep breath trying to calm herself down, but she just hated the fact that Sark had gotten to spend so many years with her mother that she hadn't. That they shared 'fun' restaurants around the world together and secret memories she didn't. She hated that she was so jealous and wondered for the first time…if this is what it felt like to have 'sibling' rivalry…having never had to really share her parents before. Lena was different, she was a little baby that Sydney adored…completely different than Sark.

"Sounds great." Dixon smiled softly, taking a seat on the couch while they waited.

"I agree." Weiss nodded happily, his stomach growling and making everyone laugh. "Hey, its hard work beating up and chasing down the bad guys. Expend a lot of energy. And I bruised my hip jumping into the back of that damn car!"

"Mom went flying out off a balcony, dropping two stories and jumped two cars 20 feet in the air on a motorcycle after getting shot…and you're the one talking about expending energy and bruising your hip?" Sydney looked at him with an accusatory smile and everyone laughed again, even Weiss. "She hasn't complained at all."

"Yeah but she's _She-Ra: Princess of Power_ and I'm no _He-Man_!" Weiss gave her a pointed look and everyone burst into laughter again.

"I used to love that cartoon when I was younger…I think. Did I?" Sark looked happy for a moment seeing a flash of his childhood and then it was gone he looked to Irina.

"Yes." She smiled brightly, remembering the blonde little boy begging her to watch it on Saturday mornings. Probably the only 'normal' child thing that he did, everything else was as if he were a small adult. "You would beg me every Saturday morning to watch it. You named that stray dog Orko after the red ghost character, remember?"

Irina was excited to see him remembering something from around his Project Christmas training. Everyone in the room was watching this unexpected reveal from Sark and Irina with intrigue.

Jack walked out of the bathroom and realized how quiet the room had gotten.

"Yes…I do." Sark furrowed his brow in thought, remembering the flashes of the little dog in the alley by the apartment building they occupied in Moscow. "Cuvee said he was a straggler not worth carrying for…and shot him in front of me." He looked up suddenly finding Irina's eyes and everyone else felt a wave of sadness, not only for Sark at realizing yet another reason he was so emotionally detached, but for the flash of pain that name had caused Irina.

The most trained eye would not have noticed it if they had not known to look for it.

"Yes." She spoke softly, inhaling deeply, turning and walking toward the baby. She had come back to the apartment that afternoon to see Julian sitting on the cement step, face completely blank as he stared at the dead dog at his feet. She simply patted his head and walked into the building, wanting to hug him but unable to. He was only seven.

The 'protective agents' and Carrie had returned moments later and the room filled with smiles and laughter as they recanted the day's heroics to Carrie and the agents. She said she had just spoken on the phone to Marshall who was talking a hundred miles an hour about it.

* * *

_***Bamboleo***_

"Ok, I'm buying the drinks tonight!" Weiss smiled broadly as they ordered their third round, eating at the exquisite restaurant as the liquor started setting in. "I think we should all have a shot of vodka in salute to our Siberian Tiger and her mighty pursuit of the prey!"

Everyone burst out laughing and the Bristow trio blushed again, but smiled. Alcohol had a way of easing tension and bringing out laughter. They were all excited after today's events.

"Drinks on you?" Vaughn looked at him with a funny grin and surprise in his voice, "You never buy drinks…you never even offer to buy drinks…"

"I do too!" Weiss said defensively as everyone laughed. "I offered the last time we were all going to go out when we were in Spain, remember? In Barcelona?"

"But you didn't." Vaughn teased him, knowing he shouldn't.

"I was shot in the neck for Christ-sake!" Weiss's eyebrows shot up with a smile, turning to point at Irina, "By her screwdriver!"

And everyone laughed except Irina who only smiled and shook her head, feeling terrible about that now.

"Well it seems that, since it was my fault he couldn't buy everyone drinks, I will buy us all dinner and drinks tonight." She smiled, leaning over to kiss Weiss's cheek. "I am sorry about that." She looked at him apologetically.

"No, it's fine now." He smiled, blushing after she had kissed him, "In fact we were just talking about how, now, its sort of a badge of honor to be shot by Irina Derevko and live through it. We're thinking about starting a fan club, aren't we Syd," He looked at her and winked, "Get t-shirts printed up and everything that say, _'I've been shot by Irina Derevko and lived to tell my tale!_"

Everyone burst into laughter again, except for Irina.

"I'm glad you can all find humor in that." Irina scrunched her eyebrow, not exactly sure how she felt about that; but smiled joining in on the laugh.

"I think we should start a whole 'Irina Derevko' line." Vaughn finally cracked a smile joining in on the fun of teasing Irina, "We could sell lunch boxes, our personalized screwdrivers, Morris Code earrings and gift tags that say, 'I've given you a gift…and all you get from me is one!"

Everyone was in hysterics except for Jack, Sydney, Sark, and Dixon who had no idea why that last part was funny. Everyone else had seen the interaction and heard it on the monitor that day Vaughn went to Irina's cell for help.

"Wait, wait, wait! I don't get it?" Sydney scrunched her eyebrows and wondered if her slowed thought process was because of the alcohol or if she really didn't remember.

"When you went to Rabat…I went to Irina to ask her if there was anything you should know before opening the safe." Vaughn took Sydney's hand in his with a big smile, seeing her funny 'slightly' drunk look. Dixon's interest was suddenly peaked, remembering this trip to Rabat though he was working on the SD-6 side at the time.

"I told him to tell you to pull the fire alarm, remember?" Irina asked softly with a smile before taking another sip of her wine, enjoying it after so many months without it.

"Yeah?" Sydney nodded, "I remember, I didn't do it and the alarm went off but what does that have to do with 'gifts?"

Everyone laughed again and Sydney's eyebrows shot up with a bewildered smile.

"I asked Irina if there was anything else and she said in that scary voice," He smiled at her and everyone went into another fit of laughter knowing exactly what he was talking about, "_I've given you a gift, and all you get from me…is one." _

Everyone's laughter rang louder including Sydney who looked at Irina smiling and shaking her head.

"Mom, you are funny!" Sydney threw her head back laughing, just picturing it.

"Funny now! But at the time she creeped the shit out of me!" Vaughn exaggerated his words with his alcohol intake and everyone's laughter rang out again.

"That was in the intent, Agent Vaughn." Irina smiled madly, swirling her wine and taking another sip winking at him and another peel of laughter rolled off.

Their shots arrived and everyone raised them in a toast, simultaneously shouting, with the exception of Irina who wasn't in on their 'toasting' plot, "To our Siberian Tiger! _Rwarr_!" and pawed at the air, laughing themselves into hysterics after slamming their shots and coughing as the vodka burned in their throats.

"You should have heard Jack swearing under his breath on the Coms, Irina, when Zamir grabbed your behind and then assaulted your chest with his tongue." Weiss thought he'd share that with her. "He kept saying he was going to kill him!"

Everyone kept laughing, not sure when was the last time they ever remembered laughing this hard…all of them.

"Who says I won't when I see that smarmy bastard tomorrow?" Jack replied in his Jack Bristow tone before cracking a smile as everyone kept laughing, tears in their' eyes.

"I kept waiting for her to knee him in the groin." Sydney smiled and shrugged, taking a drink of her own wine and raising another round of laughter at not only her words but the look on her face.

"I almost did…" Irina's eyes danced dangerously in the low light of the atmosphere, "But I didn't want to make a scene."

"No, instead you jumped off the balcony after him, bounced off the tent, and rolled to the ground, stole a motorcycle and proceeded to chase him through Seville, crashing one hundred and three cars in the process." Jack smirked at her, enjoying her feisty eyes when he teased her.

"James Bond, eat your heart out!" Sark added in his British accent and everyone died with laughter once more.

"Excuse me." Irina smiled and stood a moment later, heading for the rest room while everyone continued sharing their parts of the story and thoughts from today.

Vaughn stood a few moments later and excused himself, the copious amounts of alcohol forcing a bathroom break on just about everyone. Jack followed a few minutes later but with different intentions. He looked around cautiously for a moment and slipped inside the restroom with a wooden plaque stating "Senorita" on the door. The room was elegantly decorated with the theme of the restaurant with a little red couch and two stalls opposite a large counter with two sinks and a mirror.

_***Baila Me***_

Irina was standing in front of the mirror, reapply her lipstick when she spotted her husband and giggled against the vibrated shade of smooth red.

"Jack, what are you doing?" She laughed putting her lipstick back in her purse as he clicked the lock on the door, realizing they were alone.

"I can't wait any more. I have to have you now. I'm going crazy sitting in there so close and not being able to touch you." Jack smiled with rosy cheeks as both their faces flushed from the alcohol. He walked up beside her and pressed his hands on the counter, testing its strength with a dangerous gleam in his eye.

Sydney stumbled slightly, a little dizzy and smiled when the guys laughed. "I must excuse myself for a moment." She laughed softly in search of the restroom leaving Weiss, Sark and Dixon alone at the table.

"We better make this quick, Agent Bristow." Irina turned with a dangerous gleam in her eye, and pressed herself against Jack. His lips came thundering down on hers in a fast frenzy, his hands tangling in her hair as Irina worked quickly to undo his belt and pants button.

"Sydney! What are you doing in here?" Vaughn finished washing his hands and smiled in the bathroom mirror startled by her presence. With a naughty gleam in her eye, she clicked the door locked and sauntered towards him with purpose.

Irina's fingers pushed down his pants and the boxers followed quickly after. His cock growing harder under her finger pressure and Jack jerked into her hand slightly.

"Now! I have to be buried in you now." He panted against her mouth.

"Mmmm," Irina moaned against his mouth when his hands moved down her body and into the slit on her leg, grasping her thigh and pulling it up, over his hip so his bare cock pressed into her groin. He backed them up against the wall and grabbed the smooth fabric of her dress, pushing it up her hips just enough to get access to what he wanted. His finger's caressing her delicate skin on her inner thighs and Irina's mind began swimming feeling the passion building inside of her with just his touch.

_Opposite side, Vaughn had Sydney pinned against the same wall._

"We have to make this quick, Agent Vaughn." Her hazy eyes smiled into his as his lips descended onto her mouth.

Irina wrapped one arm around his neck to keep him close as their mouths dueled into each others sweet depths, the other hand snaked down his chest to his shaft and ran her thumb over his tip making him moan. His hand moved up and pushed the smooth band of her red thong to the side, sliding his fingers between her folds and finding her already slick with desire. His fingers pinched and twist her swollen nub between his fingers making Irina pant before plunging two fingers into her hot core making her gasp loudly and Jack shook with desire feeling her muscles contracting around his fingers while he teased her g-spot. Her hand gripped his cock and massaged it in time with Jack's thrusts into her with his fingers until they were both panting. He dropped his mouth to her neck and laved at her pulse point making Irina hiss as her skin felt on fire.

"You're so beautiful." His hand tangled in her hair again, whispering against her neck as his scorching tongue assaulted her skin.

"Ahhhh…" Irina inhaled sharply feeling herself about to explode with his measured internal caressing.

Jack's hand disentangled from her wild mane and moved down the front of her body, pinching her erect nipples protruding through the fabric of her dress having not worn a bra. He paused on her pleasure peaks for just a moment before his hand continued south and he placed his palm on her abdomen just above her crux and pressed in the same time his fingers pressed out inside her.

The contact and pressure making Irina tremble as he kneaded her inside and out and she exploded with a strangled scream of his name around his hand.

Jack felt her convulsing his against his fingers and palm, her whole body trembling and he had to help support her as her legs shook.

Irina squeezed his cock hard as she fell over the edge and Jack couldn't wait any longer, he withdrew his fingers from her trembling box, grabbed his swollen shaft and thrust up into her making Irina scream all over again as he brought her back to the height of her orgasm filling her up.

"Jack!" She panted with eyes shut and head thrown back against the wall as his long shaft slid out and pounded back into her.

"My God, do you feel amazing." Jack gasped, the sensation of Irina's quivering interior rocked by her explosion rapidly bringing Jack to his own climax and he increased the speed of his thrust, groaning into her neck as his abs and ass worked in tandem to keep her on a high until he reached ecstasy himself. "Ahhh, Irina!" He drove into her supremely tight vagina and her muscles worked him overtime. He felt the spark igniting his explosion and thrust hard up into her making them both pant and gasp for air, and with another powerful drive went flying over the cliff after her, screaming her name into her hair and neck as his member pulsed inside her confines. Pumping and thrusting until they had both expended themselves fully.

Irina tilted his face to meet hers while her breathing was still rapid and uneven, her leg still hung over his hip and his deflating member still being milked inside her. "I love you." She smiled into his black sated eyes with her own bringing her lips to his and sliding her determined tongue inside to caress him.

"Ok…they've been gone fifteen minutes." Weiss smiled and filled his glass of wine, and that of his two comrades at the table, "Who here wants to bet that 'Panama Jack' went to take on his Siberian Tiger?" He laughed a deep giggle as Sark smiled and his body shook with held in laughs, rolling his eyes.

"Newlyweds." Dixon joined them in laughter, sitting back against his chair.

"Well hell! You saw that dress! I'm surprised he made it this long!" Weiss's eyes lit up and they all nodded dying in laughter, burning red from all the wine they drank.

"If I hadn't heard about the 'unfinished business' in the cell, I would have never believed Jack Bristow capable of doing anything like that in a restaurant bathroom!" Dixon smirked.

"And Sydney and Agent Vaughn." Sark added and brought on another hysterical round of laughter. "I wonder if each of them has any idea of what is going on in the opposite bathroom." He added smoothly and Weiss snorted laughing so hard he was banging the table with his hand just thinking about it.

Jack and Irina chose that moment to walk back to the table and saw the desperate attempts from trio to try and reign in their laughter, failing miserably.

"Where's Sydney and Michael?" Irina asked with her beautiful smile, wondering where her daughter and future son-in-law went to as Jack pulled out her chair.

"That's interesting…They both went to the bathroom about the same time you two did!" Weiss spat out in his laughter and Dixon and Sark lost it seeing Jack and Irina's eyes widening realizing what Sydney and Vaughn were apparently doing in the opposite bathroom.

Jack put his face in his hands and smoothed them over his face as it burned bright red. They'd been caught again…because their daughter and Vaughn had been doing the same thing.

"What's so funny?" Sydney asked slightly slurred coming up behind them and the trio rang out into hysterics again at the two couples staring at them.

Irina took note of her daughter's flushed face and slightly wild hair and looked down giggling, proud of her daughter.

"So Syd, what were you and your Mom talking about in the bathroom for the last twenty minutes?" Weiss turned to her as she sat down with a curious smile.

"And you and Jack, Vaughn? What were you talking about that long?" He snorted as Vaughn looked perplexed.

"What are you talking about?" Sydney slurred and looked to her mother who was chewing on her lip, trying not to laugh, though her eyes betrayed her.

"Well all four of you left for the bathroom twenty minutes ago and just now returned." Weiss prodded and swigged his wine, trying not to spit it out when he saw Syd and Vaughns' eyes flash to Irina and Jack, realization setting in. "There must have been more 'unfinished business' to take care of in the restrooms, I guess." He burst out laughing when Sydney covered her eyes with her hand, resting her arm on the table with her deep giggle escaping.

* * *

"Hello!" Irina 'loudly' whispered when they found their way back to the suite and greeted the agents hours later.

Jack was holding her up to keep her from falling, her red high heels in his hand, as she was their wide eyes of astonishment he guided her into the room smiling, "She's a little tipsy."

Carrie and the agents snorted with held in laughter, as Irina flashed them all brilliant smiles while Jack guided her across the room to a chair to sit down.

"It's not my fault that my toler-ance has dropped in the las-t year." She slurred in her heavy accent with a big smile as Jack plopped her onto the chair in the living room. She hadn't drunk any alcohol in over a year because of the baby with the exception of a few glasses of champagne at their wedding...and the diabetes wasn't helping.

"How was our angel?" Jack smiled, feeling 'high' himself and amused by Irina's drunken state.

"She was perfect." Carrie smiled and then bit her lip to keep from laughing out loud having never witnessed either Jack or Irina intoxicated. They were quite funny.

"Tank you." Jack slurred out as he waved and smiled when they exited the room.

"_Tank you_!" The agents chorused together once outside the room, busting a gut with laughter after Jack shut the door.

_***Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman***_

"So Mr. Bris-tow." Irina slurred with a her deviant eyes and seductive smile… Jack was looking mighty tempting as he walked towards her and she moved to stand on wobbly legs. "Whoa!" She laughed as she almost fell over and Jack caught her.

"Whoa there, tiger." Jack laughed bringing her to his chest as they swayed together. "Did I tell yooou…how bea-uuutifuuuuul you are todaaaaay?" His hand came up to her face and brushed her hair back over her head, smoothing it against his palm with a smile.

"Yes. We are so smashed." She burst into giggles as her mind floated around, her body tingling.

"Not so smashed that I don't seee how beautiful you are." His lips descended onto hers, tasting the sweet wine lingering in her mouth. His own blood pounding in his ears as his hands roamed her body, taking in her curves. "I want you." He whispered, pawing clumsily at his own shirt as Irina threaded her fingers into his soft hair. He was definitely more alert then Irina whom he kept laughing at against his mouth with her constant giggles. He would never tire of that sound. His hands finally tore away his shirt and pulled it violently off, pressing his bare chest against her. "I love you Irina…you scared me today." His hands softly cupping her face looking into her hazy eyes as she rested her heated palms against his hard pecks. He had been terrified and thrilled all at once watching her in action.

"I'm sorry, Jack." She whispered 'loudly' again, having no volume control and she giggled again nuzzling her face into his and inhaling his scent.

"You don't have to be sorry." His lips kissed lightly over her lips, and cheek, the soft skin by her eye. "You didn't do anything wrong. I just want you to know…how much I love you."

Irina's hands racked down his chest and around his sides, gripping his back and capturing his mouth with hers in wet and wild kiss, plunging her tongue into his warm cavern.

"I love you too…so much." She nipped at his bottom lip, teasing until he tangled his hands into her hair and crashed their mouths together, searching her mouth with his tongue, invading her luscious space, wanting to consume everything about her.

Irina suddenly pulled her leg from his shoulder and let his drop to his side, pulling off him completely leaving his eyes wide and gasping as the cool night air attacked his wet cock when it let the scorching confines of her body.

She swayed slightly reaching her hand out to him. "On the bed Jack." She begged him with her eyes, wanting to do something else she was yearning for.

He gasped loudly when he stood with much effort, his erect dick swaying with the movements searching for the heat it had just lost.

"On your knees." Irina commanded through heavy lids, pointing him to the center of the enormous bed.

Jack crawled to the center and pulled Irina with him, he knew what she wanted and the thought excited him to no end, he grabbed himself jerking his shaft a few times and groaning as he watched her climb over him and hold herself up in front of him on all fours.

Without waiting to be asked, he sat up and slid his fingers into her slick fold from behind, his other hand on the curve of her hip. He forced his cock down and into her enveloping heat. With a grunt and forceful thrust that left Irina breathless, he entered her tight vagina again pulling out and thrusting in again, pulling her back onto him listening to her gasps and moans of pleasure. His hand reached under her and pulled her back to him as she sat straddling his knees, his chest to her back.

With synchronized movements, their bodies' thrust together using their thighs rising off their heels and dropping back onto one another again and again as Jack encircled her with his arms. One arm below her breasts, feeling their soft weight on his skin with ever drive, the other hand stroking her swollen clit and making her moan loudly as his hot mouth placed languid kisses against the soft flesh of her neck, her head lying back against his shoulder tilted and giving him access.

Irina's hand threaded into his hair, holding his head to her as her arm wrapped behind his head, the other hand pressing against her lower abdomen, feeling the head of his cock pummeling into her from the outside and meeting its trusts with her hand making both she and Jack groan from the contact.

Their speed increased with their need for release and Irina knew Jack was getting close with his quicker pants for breath, feeling him begin to tremble beneath her.

"Come for me, Jack…Come on baby." She coaxed him with her words.

"Ahh!" Jack panted as his hips, thighs and ass worked in tandem with Irina's racing toward the edge of ecstasy. "Oh God…" He chanted, it felt so good to be inside her.

Irina knew how to push him violently over the edge and dropped the hand pressing on her belly between their legs, spreading her thighs out further and Jack did the same unconsciously knowing what she was going to do as his eyes screwed shut on the crux of his explosion.

She leaned forward slightly reaching her hand back further and with her strong fingers found the smooth skin behind his sack. She pressed up hard in time with his thrusts and Jack immediately started jerking into her with a frenzied pace.

"God Irina!" He chanted as her fingers stroked his prostrate from the outside and he thrust into her with everything he had exploding from the inside out.

Irina felt the explosion first against her fingers and then into her own body making her moan loudly as he continued chanting her name riding the waves of ecstasy she had given to him and wanting to reward her by bringing her with him. He shifted slightly as his waves blinded him and pressed his palm into her lower abdomen feeling the tip of his hard cock ramming into his hand from inside her and Irina mewed loudly setting off a series of explosions with in as he rocked against her internal source of pleasure, throwing her head back against him, her body racked with violent turbulent spasms and screaming out his name.

When he was spent and could no longer hold the both of them up, he collapsed backwards over his heels and brought her with him, his arm still securely around her dainty rib cage.

Their sweat slicked bodies quivering and trembling together for a few moments before Irina rolled off of him and curled into his side, with her arm draped over his chest and her leg entangling with his own.

"I think you fucked me…sober, Agent Bris-tow." She kissed his chest and laughed when he did, her voice heavy with passion and slurred.

"Come here." Jack smiled and pulled on her arm, rolling her up onto his chest so that she was covering him like a blanket. His hands cupped her face as her dark mane framed it beautifully and his heart continued to thump loudly beneath her staring into her beautiful dark orbs. He pulled her towards him, bringing her sensual lips to his own and kissed her deeply. He pulled the blanket and sheets up and over them as Irina scooted down some and nestled her head on his chest, ear pressed to his heart and arms encircling him as his encircled her. He dropped a kiss to the top of her head.

"I love you…My Love."

"I love you, too." She smiled with her eyes closed, drifting off to sleep with extreme exhaustion after the day she had, feeling safe and loved in the arms of her man.

* * *

"Jack…" A sweet voice broke into his dreams, calling to him and he felt a gentle kiss upon his lips bringing his eyes fluttering open. Irina was hovering over him, her hair up in a loose French twist, looking like perfection and smiling madly as she dropped another kiss to his beautiful lips. "Wake up Sweetheart…time to go." She nuzzled him softly, before extracting herself off the bed and Jack sat up rubbing his eyes to get the sleep out, a dull ache pounding in his head.

He squeezed his eyes shut and clasped his head in his hands, moaning against the pressure.

Irina turned around and laughed softly, grabbing a glass and filling it with water, taking two Advil from her purse she walked over and handed them to him. "This will help you feel better." She handed them to him with a soft smile, running her hand over his hair before turning to scoop up Lena who was kicking wide-awake in her basket. "Hello beautiful baby of mine." She cooed softly in Russian and Lena immediately lit into a smile hearing her mothers' voice and seeing her face. She gurgled happily as Irina shifted her, holding her upright and lightly supporting her back. "Jack…look." She smiled widely seeing Lena wobbling slightly but holding her head up on her own.

Jack's heart melted and his headache temporarily disappeared seeing how rapidly his baby was changing and the smile that lit her mother's face.

"She's so strong for her age and size." Jack smiled as Irina moved to stand closer and noticed Jack's sudden reaction of stun as his eyes raked in her appearance.

She was wearing the exact same outfit, the light black sweater and the white and black skirt when she had come to him that night in LA, to tell her about being pregnant and he yelled at her…almost ruining their entire future.

The first night she felt their baby kick and now she was standing there holding 'said' baby in her arms.

"Jack, what is it?" She looked at him a little concerned, drawing her fingers over the small curve of Lena's little head and soft hair.

"You were wearing that outfit. When you came to me in LA. To tell me you were pregnant and I yelled at you." He spoke softly with a hint of sadness in his voice. "You looked so beautiful then and you do now, too."

"Ah." Irina suddenly remembered a small smile coming to her face as she sat down next to him on the bed, crossing her legs and exposing her knee through the slit. "How did you remember that and not me?"

"Because the moment I saw you I couldn't help but think about how incredibly beautiful you were," He reached up cupping her face with his hand, brushing his thumb over her cheek softly, looking into her eyes, "and how sexy your legs were." His small smile turned into a wide grin, as did Irina's. "I couldn't decide if I wanted to kiss you or strangle you in that moment."

"You did neither." Irina smiled with a small shrug of her eyebrows, pressing her lips to Lena's forehead as the baby bobbed in her arms, testing her own strength to hold herself upright.

"No, I just verbally abused you instead." Jack looked at her apologetically with his dark eyes, smoothing his hand down her neck and bringing his other hand up to Lena's little head, smoothing her hair with his palm. "And our little peanut here, made her presence known to you…" He smiled sadly, but broke into a grin when Lena smiled at Irina, raising her little fists trying to control her arms and reach for Irina's face. "I'll never forgive myself for being such an ass that night…for making her first kick a sad memory for you."

"Jack…" Irina's heart felt heavy, that was a terrible night, "It's ok now, despite the circumstance surrounding it… I still think of that first kick with a sense of joy…you didn't make it sad. I am only saddened that you couldn't share in it with me." She caught his hand over Lena's back and held it there with her own.

"I missed almost your entire pregnancy…the first seven months of her life growing inside you," Jack swallowed hard, his mind suddenly flashing to 'what might have been' if he hadn't gone after her. She wouldn't be sitting with him now, with their baby…he wouldn't even have known existed. "I hate that. I wish I could turn back time on so many things."

"But we can't…" Irina sighed, feeling the same way herself many times. "I hate that I missed out on Sydney's life for twenty-one years…and that you missed out on most of my pregnancy with Lena but Jack, the important thing is that I am here now. I have Sydney again for the rest of my life and you were there when Lena was born… and will be for the rest of your life. That's all that matters now." She smiled brightly, leaning over to capture his lips in a sweet kiss.

"Did I tell you how sexy you are today?" He smiled and laughed deeply as she ran her fingers through his bed head.

"No I don't think so, but Thank you…" She kissed him again smiling, "You look pretty sexy yourself Jack." She scooted off the bed and walked towards the baby bag, retrieving Lena's clothes for the day.

Jack studied her for a moment and realized something he'd almost forgotten from their past, "You don't have the slightest bit of a hangover do you?" He smiled perturbed by that fact as she was way, more drunk then he was.

"Nope." She laughed, laying Lena on the end of the bed and carefully ridding her of her sleeper.

"That is not fair." He sighed and pouted and Irina laughed again looking at him.

"Jack, I'm Russian. We are raised with vodka in the bottle and breast…" She laughed deeply teasing him and he furrowed his eyebrows with a naughty grin thinking about tasting that alcohol infected sweetness from her gorgeous bussom. "I know what you're thinking about." She glanced up at him and chuckled shaking her head as she snapped the buttons together on Lena's Onzie.

His naughty little mind was going back to last night and the comments that made her laugh. "I was just wondering if the sweet-bar was open again?" He waggled his eyebrows at her and she laughed deeply. Jack scooted towards the end of the bed with the sheet still covering him towards his girls.

"You're incorrigible, Jack."She shook her head as the baby kicked and gurgled, smiling up at her mother happily.

Jack laughed deeply and leaned over, kissing his daughter's forehead and smiling when he saw her eyes fix on him and give another smile, the first real smile she ever gave to him.

"Hello, my beautiful little peanut." He reached out and caught her tiny swaying fist with his fingers and she grabbed onto his pointer. He scanned her face and body that was ever changing these days, noticing her hair was getting a little longer as were her eyelashes. Her baby blue eyes were still bright as ever though the edges were hinting at the darkening color to come. "She's so beautiful." He smiled in awe as she wiggled and gurgled, trying to kick her legs out when Irina captured her little foot to put a sock on. He leaned over again and showered her head, face, arms, chest, belly, anything he could with kisses and they both heard the tiny deep giggle."Did you hear that?" Jack's eyes darted up to Irina's in surprise. "She laughed!"

"You were tickling her." Irina's enchanting smile widened witnessing three firsts for Lena with Jack in the span of 10 minutes.

Jack smiled brightly and repeated his prior kissing pattern as the baby squirmed beneath him, smiling and again they heard the tiny giggle.

"Ahh!" Jack yelped softly in glee looking down at her beautiful little face with happiness. "Daddy made you laugh!" He attacked her again with his kisses, enjoying this ever more and again, they heard the tiny laugh and both he and Irina laughed softly together.

Irina's heart was soaring as she knelt down at the end of the bed beside them. Both Jack and Lena's smiles were radiant as they played together and her eyes felt tears stinging in them remembering the same loving father he was with Sydney, she could still picture him doing this with their first child on the their bed when she was a baby.

"As much as I really hate to break this up-" Irina kissed the baby's little foot softly, cupped in her hand, "We have to meet everyone in the lobby in twenty minutes to go question Zamir." Her eyes darted to Jack's and they both sighed.

"Ok, Daddy's got to take a shower now but I'll give you a million more kisses before we leave." He smiled radiantly at the little baby and dropped a light kiss to her soft dark hair before rolling out of bed.

Irina watched his cute, naked retreating form with a smile."Nice butt, Agent Bristow." She giggled as Jack stopped to clench his butt muscles a couple of times before entering the bathroom.

* * *

"Don't make me hurt you anymore then I have to." Irina paced around the small metal table arms folded over her chest, her tone cold and icy…her 'scary tone.'

The other's watched from behind the double-sided mirror with fascination at how Irina interrogated.

"Tell me where Arvin Sloane is hiding and we'll see about getting your sentenced reduced from the Death Penalty to Life." They had been questioning him for the last hour and getting nowhere.

"I'd rather die, you psychotic bitch!" He spat at her in Arabic, then literally spat at her.

Irina was out of patience and as fast as lightening, grabbed his hair and arm, smashing his head into the table and yanking his arm behind his back, squeezing the hand she had shot painfully hard, feeling the blood soaking through the bandages beneath her hand.

He was breathing heavily trying not to scream out but his face was clearly contorted in raw pain.

Irina leaned over and in a deadly calm voice, "I've been Executed. It isn't as welcoming as you'd think. The liquid fire they shoot in your veins…you feel it seeping into your every cell…slowly…it consumes you one cell at a time…It steals your breath away as your lungs begin to hemorrhage and pool, drowning you in your own blood…You feel your muscles tensing so hard from the shock…you're certain…you will crush your own bones beneath their fibers."

Everyone behind the glass stood in absolute stillness, Sydney with tears in her eyes hearing Irina recount for the first time…what it felt like for her to die…

"The pressure in your veins explodes the vessels, starting with the smallest. You feel them tearing apart everywhere in your body and soon you can't see as your blood seeps from your eyes…You're drowning so slowly as the fire rages on in your body…like no hell you can ever imagine…until you are lost in your' own private hell in the darkness…and then nothing."

Zamir was panting rapidly beneath her, her warm breath tickling his ear.

Sydney inhaled a sob and batted at a fallen tear and Jack swallowed hard. He and Irina had never discussed her Execution, her death; and what it was like for her. She hadn't offered, and he didn't want to know…it scared him.

"You're dead. It's…quiet…still…and you feel a sudden rush as your soul tears away from your body. You can see it on that black table that held you to your death as you're pulled away…and then you wait…in the darkness…alone…for the angels…or the demons…to come and claim you."

Irina had stowed all of her own feelings into a small compartment for the time being and was the master of perfection, not giving anything away. She felt Zamir trembling beneath her.

"And which was it, Irina?" He asked in sharp trembling voice, his contempt obvious, "Who came for you? The angels…or the demons?"

"That is between God and I," She wouldn't answer that for him, "The question isn't who came for me…its who would come for you, Zamir? I may have killed hundreds but you have killed thousands of innocent people out of hate. Do you think if you died right now, Allah would let you into his kingdom…or let you continue to burn in the fires of hell?" She switched back to Arabic, hitting home the point of his faith and religion.

"Oh she's good…She's scaring the shit out of me." Weiss hugged his arms tighter together where they were folded across his chest, watching the effect Irina was having on the man.

"Some how I think, you could use a Life Sentence to try and make your amends with your Allah." She hissed into his ear, "Why die for the likes of Arvin Sloane? What is he to you? Tell us where he is…and you get to stay alive."

Zamir's nostrils were flaming as his breath quickened trying to decide what to do.

"Don't be a stupid man and die for a man you don't know… Don't put your family's lives in danger…over this man."

He jerked beneath her when she mentioned harming his family and she pulled his arm higher, twisting it painfully and pulling at his hair.

"Your sister…Isabella…your mother Anna…your daughter Mina. What is she? Two now?"

His face was burning in rage. "You will not touch my family! I'll kill if you harm one hair on my child's head!" He screamed at her in Arabic.

"My God, she wouldn't?" Sydney gasped thinking about her mother going after his little girl.

"Of course not, Sydney." Sark shook his head as if he were disappointed in her, "Irina would never harm a child. She's using it as leverage, she knows will work…from what I now know, comes from her own experience." He looked at her with sad and determined eyes, "As a mother, she sacrificed herself…to protect you…her child. She knows any other parent would do the same. Irina's never been wrong about that."

Sydney swallowed hard, blinking back her unshed tears turning back to watch her mother, thinking about what Sark said. Everyone… thinking about what Sark had said.

"You threatened my child! Remember?" Irina screamed into his ear, pulling his head back roughly and pinning his arm up higher. "Selling out my location to Sloane so that he could kidnap me! Steal my child from my own body and sell her on the Black Market!" She took a calming breath and added in a deadly voice, "Perhaps that is what I will do with little Mina. Sell her on the Black Market to the sex trade. Let your daughter be lost forever and living a life of pain and misery!"

"No!" He screamed back at her, tears filling his eyes.

"Then tell me where to find Sloane!" She continued in her deadly calm.

"Africa! He's in Africa!" He sobbed out.

"Where in Africa?" She hissed into his ear as her heartbeat quickened.

"Libya. He built a compound in the desert." His eyes burned with rage and tears. He wasn't going to die for some ass or let his daughter be savaged on the Black Market.

"For what? What did you do for him?" Irina felt his own heartbeat beneath her bloody fingers holding onto his damaged wrist and hand.

"I secured the sale of the property…with the Libyans. Helped him arrange a meeting with Dubey…told him where you lived in Russia."

She pulled back on his head further, anger rising inside her. "You're going to tell me everything you know, every single detail, right now or I am going to send my team to your mother's summer home in Madrid and get your daughter."

His eyes flashed wide in fear and anger,

"Yes, that's right…I know where you're keeping her right now…trying to keep her safe while you're in country…I can have someone inside that house in less then five minutes if you fuck with me! Do you understand?" She spoke deadly quiet into his ear.

"Yes." He answered in a quiver of rage and fear.

* * *

"I need to take this back to Kendall, go over the schematics." Jack leaned against the wall outside the interrogation room, arms folded across his chest talking quietly with Irina who'd gotten everything they needed to move forward out of Zamir.

"And I need to speak with my contacts from Russia." She sighed with a small smile, "Also, I have some inside connections with Libya and Egypt that will help." She was quiet a moment contemplating before staring him in the eyes, "Jack, I want to run this Op my way." She was saying what she wanted but also asking him to let her. "Please, trust me on this?" Her dark eyes pleaded with him in what would be another massive test of trust between them.

He looked at her and then down at the gray tile flooring, sighing before raising his eyes to hers again.

"Ok, we'll do it your way." He gave her a small nervous smile that lit into a bigger one when he saw the sparkle of light and happiness in her eyes that he'd accepted.

She leaned forward and grabbed his face softly, kissing him on the lips and he grabbed her hips with his hands, holding her to him, knowing they were about to be separated for a period of time.

"Thank you." She smiled, pulling back and slightly breathless. "I'll take Julian with me, I need his help in organizing this from our side…I'll call you with a location to meet in 72 hours."

"Ok." He shook his head, swallowing hard. "Be safe. I love you, Irina."

"Be safe, Jack. I love you, too." She smiled broadly and kissed his lips once more before going off in search of Sark.

"Now I've got to take care of something." Jack hissed under his breath and strode with purpose toward the interrogation room.

"What the?" Zamir barely had time to register the visitor before Jack coal-cocked him across the jaw sending his head whipping in the opposite direction.

Irina and the others stopped their conversation stunned, watching Jack behind the glass.

"That was for assaulting my wife's chest with your disgusting tongue." Jack seethed anger and hit him again, recognition flashing across Zamir's face before the fist collided with the other side of his face. "That was for doing it twice." He hit him again, "That was for grabbing her ass," He hit Zamir again and the man's nose and lip were bleeding everywhere, "That was for groping her thigh." He smashed the man again and split his cheek, "That was shooting at her," He wailed him again, his own knuckles bleeding, "That was for scarring her beautiful skin," He pounded the man again and split the other cheek, "That was for trying to lead her into cars," He switched to and upper cut as Zamir's head started to lull on its side and snapped his head back when his fist collided with the under side of the man's jaw, "That was for trying to shoot her when she got your ass," Jack pulled at the man's shirt, keeping him upright in his chair as the blood poured out of him and his eyes were already swelling shut, "And this…is for sending Sloane after her in Russia…endangering her life…and our baby's." And with that Jack knocked him out, hitting him so hard he spun and dropped to the floor out of the chair. Jack shook out his hands as his knuckles bled and swelled instantly.

"Holy shit! Jack just kicked his ass!" Vaughn laughed as they all stood stunned, and Irina's eyes were wide in astonishment.


	45. Chapter 45

**_AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Crimson Tide Theme by Hans Zimmer from The Crimson Tide Soundtrack, Holla' If You Hear Me (The Rebel) by Tupac, Take My Breathe Away by Berlin._**

* * *

FORTY-FIVE

o

**_*Crimson Tide*_**

_Atlantic Ocean- 200 miles off the coast of Spain_

Jack, Sydney, Vaughn, Weiss, Dixon, Carrie and Marshall stood on the deck of the US Juneau warship in life vests and Navy clothes scanning the horizon with binoculars.

The ship was in the middle of the Annual War Games and had agreed to drop them with their transportation ship.

"Are you certain these are the coordinates Agent Bristow?" Capt. Rabb adjusted his binoculars as they ship swayed beneath them and Marshall looked green with seasickness.

"Positive Captain. I've double-checked twice. This is the spot." Jack furrowed his brow again, looking down at the coordinates in his hand.

"I don't see anything yet. Seaman Smith!" The Captain hollered.

"Yes sir?" The young man in a Navy blue hat, light blue shirt and orange vest stood at attention at his side.

"Has the radar picked up any ships in the 100 mile radius?" The Captain continued scanning the sea for signs of the ship.

"Yes sir. Three ships. One heading towards us, one headed East and the other South East, sir."

The young man snapped out in a loud clear voice. He couldn't have been more then eighteen years old.

"Excellent." The Captain smiled. "Sounds like you're ride should be here soon Agent Bristow!" He turned his head smiling at Jack.

Suddenly the sea rippled and a black submarine shot out from beneath the sea less then 200 yards off the bow.

"Holy shit!" Captain Rabb screamed watching the unidentified submarine break the surface in front of them and everyone else gapped in awe."Seaman Smith who the hell is that and why didn't we see them coming?" The Captain turned red in rage as the deck crew scrambled to ready positions.

"Wait, that's not a US submarine Capt.?" Jack and everyone else asked watching the giant black bullet bobbed in the waves, believing that it was.

"No, Agent Bristow it is not!" The Captain was furious another team caught them on surprise.

"They're not on the sonar Sir." The young man frantically checked the equipment. "They're still not showing up! Wait…I'm getting something," The young man pressed his head set to his ears, "It's the Russians, sir!"

"Dear God!" Jack's eyes bugged out.

The black hatch opened and a pool of water fell inside before a young Russian sailor smiled up at them. "Welcome aboard!"

They dropped down through the hatch one at a time in disbelief, following the sailor through the narrow passage ways, watching as the Russian's working at various posts throughout the enourmous sub as they were led to the bow.

"What class submarine is this?" Weiss asked Dixon through gritted teeth, not recognizing it as they passed through the sub and many sailors whose eyes were watching curiously.

What really surprised them, was the fact females were allowed to serve on submarines in the Russian navy…but then again, Irina was in charge and she was a prime example that women can do anything men can do and probably better.

"None I've ever seen." Dixon looked around in fascination.

"Oh my God, we're on a Russian Submarine!" Marshall's eyes were wide as he tried to talk out of the side of his mouth.

Jack and Sydney were the first into the command center and saw Irina's back to them, Sark on her right and the Capt of the Submarine to the left looking at a grid.

"Empress Irina, your visitors have arrived, ma'am." The sailor announced them in Russian and snapped to attention while Irina turned around with a big smile.

"Hello!" She greeted them with a big smile walking towards them followed by Sark and the Captain.

Jack was the first of the ripple affect to gawk at her uniform matching the crew and see the many medals blazoned across the breast.

"Captain Sergei Sukalov, I would like to introduce to you our Comrades on this mission, Agents Dixon, Wiess, Flinkman, Vaughn , Bowman and the Agents Bristow, my husband, and daughter." She wished she could grab Jack and kiss him senseless on the spot.

The Captain smiled brightly, not much older then Jack and fairly good looking, extended his hand in the American gesture and squeezed Jack's hand soundly.

"It is a pleasure to meet you Sir."

"Likewise Captain." Jack returned the smile and everyone else shook hands.

Irina's eyes danced with the reflected red and blue lights in the small room as she watched the exchange and Jack couldn't take his eyes off of her, seeing her for the first time in her Russian military uniform.

"Captain, Empress, we are ready to submerge."

A blonde haired sailor about twenty years old came to stand in front of them.

"All right, proceed. Set our depth at 400 meters." The Captain ordered and grabbed the bars above the walk way as did Irina so everyone else followed suit with an adrenaline rush and awe, none of them having been on a submarine before, only seen the specs.

"Aye aye Captain." The man snapped off a salute and relayed the command, "Set our depth at 400 meters!"

"Set our depth at 400 meters!" Another sailor relayed it around the room.

"Setting our depth at 400 meters, sir!" A young man who was piloting the submarine called back.

"All crew members prepare to dive!"The CO ordered into a Com and spread the word throughout the ship.

"Hang on!" Irina's eyes smiled at the bewildered faces behind her and everyone prepared to descend into the black depths of the ocean, holding on for dear life.

"Commencing dive!" The pilot shot back and slowly pushed in, forcing the massive submarine down.

"Commencing dive!"

"Commencing dive!" The officers on deck sounded the repeat of command and sub started slanting forward at a drastic angle and descending rapidly into the sea.

"50 meters…75 meters…100 meters…125 meters…140 meters…170 meters…200 meters…" The co-pilot sounded off the depths every few seconds as they hit them.

"Whoa…" Marshall's little arms struggled to hold on as their bodies all tipped forward at a sharp angle the sub creaked under the pressure and their ears began popping.

"This is like, way better then a ride at Magic Mountain." Weiss smiled brightly and Sydney giggled before noticing something that caught her attention.

In the officers chair just off to the side, Lena sat sleeping peacefully, sucking happily on her pacifier in her car seat that was strapped down. She was wearing a teeny-tiny Russian sailors shirt and pants, the traditional blue and white horizontal stripes.

"Oh my God, Mom?" Sydney's eyes went wide and pointed with her head towards the baby. "Lena?"

Their eyebrows rose in surprise and astonishment looking at the baby strapped in and asleep descending into the ocean on an unclassified submarine.

"What?" Jack's eyes went wide, then realized Irina had said she would be along for the 'ride' and meet up with them after, which is why they brought Carrie but that was when he was thinking they'd be traveling by ship or helicopter…not submarine!

"The Grand Duchess is an excellent submariner!" The Captain looked at Lena and then smiled back at Jack and to Irina who smiled happily looking over at her baby who'd adjusted well to all the pressure changes and acted like this was nothing new to her.

"375 meters…400 meters! Depth reached, sir!" The pilot shouted back and the sub started pulling level.

"Crew return to your positions, cruise depth has been reached." The CO commanded into the Com again and Irina and the Captain let go of the bars so everyone else did too.

"Hi um…excuse me?" Marshall raised his hand timidly, looking to Irina and her piercing eyes and the Captain. "I have a question…what is the class of this submarine…I mean it doesn't look like its Akula, and it dives much faster… and the propulsion system sounds different." Seeing the Captains stern stare and Irina's cocked eyebrow, "I mean…oh boy…I probably shouldn't have asked that." He stepped behind Weiss as means of protection.

"It is not Akula and you have very good ears, Marshall. "Irina's mouth twitched into a smile when she saw the little man cower. "It's something you've never seen before."

That was all she was going to give them for now and quickly moved on,

"Comrade Yelnik will show you to your quarters and then to the situation room. I'll meet you there." She used her best commanding voice and everyone seemed to straighten up with her tone, even Jack, who was ready to pounce on her in uniform, commanding a submarine and giving them orders. He couldn't wait until he had her behind closed doors.

Irina couldn't wait to get Jack behind closed doors, he looked so cute in his Navy uniform even if it was only a disguise to blend in on their ship, she wouldn't mind tearing it off of him.

"Yes ma'am." He gave her a small smile and turned on his heel to follow the others. "Agent Bristow." The young Russian sailor stopped in front of a door a few feet down from the bridge reading 'Captain' in Cyrillic and opened it, pointing him inside. "Your quarters."

"My quarters?" Jack pointed to himself, rereading the name on the door unsure.

"Yes, sir. They are Empress Irina's quarters while on board, sir. It is always a great honor to have the Tsar cruising with us and we try to make her as comfortable as possible, sir." The young man replied stoically with perfect posture. "The Empress Irina will escort you to the situation room, sir."

Jack's face lit into a smile. 'Yes!' He was going to have her alone for a moment. He gave a little wave to Sydney as she passed, smiling and followed the sailor to their quarters.

* * *

"These are your quarters Comrades." The sailor turned around showing them to a series of tiny, stacked bunks far back in the submarine with the rest of the crew.

There was eighteen inches of space to walk between bunks stacked two high, with eighteen inches of headroom.

"Oh man this sucks! Why can't I get the Captains room like Jack!" Weiss had to suck in his gut to squeeze between bunks, throwing his small black bag onto one of the lower spaces.

"Because you're not married to the Tsar!"Vaughn laughed and took the bunk above him, Sydney on the opposite top bunk and Dixon below her. Carrie was on the next top bunk down and Marshall beneath her.

"You know from the looks of everything…this submarine is almost brand new." Marshall smiled inspecting his surrounding, intrigued by the mysterious secret vessel.

"I think its fun! Like camping!" Sydney lit up into a big smile still fascinated by yet another aspect of her mother's life she knew nothing about.

"Syd, I didn't know your mom was an Officer in the military, did you?" Weiss looked at her funny, "I mean shit…she's got more medals the Patton!"

"Well I knew she was an Officer at some point in the KGB…after her re-education," She stumbled on the word and they all nodded in sadness, "But I've never asked her about it…I just read it in her KGB file."

* * *

Jack set down his black backpack on the single bed and smiled. 'They were going to have fun in there.' He laughed imagining he and Irina sleeping on a twin bed together.

The room was fairly small but beautiful, decorated with spectacular finished wood moldings and panels that Jack guessed came from the pines in the Urals. The Captain had quite an extensive collection of books both in English and Cyrillic and fabulous collections of CDs and DVDs. He smiled widely when he saw what must have been a 'special' new accommodation to the cabin for this mission.

A small crib was fastened securely to one wall and Lena's soft pink blanket and fuzzy yellow bear were sitting on its little mattress. The carving on the railing held her name and title with the inscription that read 'May you sleep with peaceful dreams as the angels guard you.' The Russian population, including its Navy, had all ready apparently fallen in love with the little Duchess. Suddenly the door opened and Irina stepped through with a big smile, followed by another young sailor carrying Lena in the car seat.

"Where shall I set her down Empress Irina, ma'am?" The young sailor stood tall holding the baby.

"There is fine Comrade Vaskovich. Thank you." She responded quickly in Russian, pointing to the floor where he stood with a big smile. "That is all, you are excused." He set Lena down carefully.

"Empress," He snapped back to attention and saluted Irina, who saluted back and he nodded, turning on his heel and was out the door, closing it behind him.

"Well, well, well…aren't you just chock-full of surprises?" Jack smiled warmly walking over to her and wrapping his arms around her, cupping her face and holding it in his hands. "A submarine Irina? I would have never expected this." He laughed and flashed her a brilliant smile before descending his lips onto hers.

She wrapped her hands around his neck, running her hands through his hair as their tongues welcomed one another into their familiar depths.

"I missed you." Irina smiled against him, as she hugged him, closing her eyes and Thankful he was holding her. "And don't you know to expect the unexpected from me by now, Jack?" She laughed into his chest and Jack laughed back. "I'll explain why when we meet the others in the situation room…which is in just a few minutes." She brought her lips to his again. "I can't get enough of you. The last three days have been torture. My body, my heart…everything aches for you." She inhaled his scent deeply as Jack gently kissed her face and neck.

"I missed you, too. God, did I miss you, Irina. My wife. My heart. My love." He buried his face into the crook of her neck. "I plan on making good use of that twin bed while we're here." He said seriously and Irina giggled squeezing his butt.

"Oh, I've already been thinking about that myself." She leaned her head down against Jacks' cheek buried in her neck.

"How much time do we have?" He asked seriously and she laughed again.

"Not enough, Jack, not enough." Her arms wrapped around his broad shoulders, smiling.

"Damn it! You look so sexy in your uniform." He cursed and felt Irina's giggles going through him before pulling her back to look at her again, "I had no idea you owned such thing." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively. "You're quite the decorated Officer." His fingers grazed the medals and ribbons of various colors.

"Yes, well that was long ago and ancient history now." She sighed, thinking about what seemed like a different lifetime now and moved to retrieve Lena from the confines of her car seat, kneeling down in front of the baby and making Jack stare at her beautiful legs as her skirt rode up her leg.

"From after Kashmir?" Jack asked cautiously watching her scoop up their baby and nestled her carefully into her arms.

"Mmmhmm." She answered without words softly and Jack knew she didn't want to talk about it right now.

"Hello my little peanut!" Jack dropped a light kiss to Lena's forehead and she scrunched her eyebrows up and snorted in her sleep making them both laugh softly. "Daddy missed you…" He ran his fingers softly over her hair with a smile. "I swear she gets bigger every time I miss seeing her for a few days."

"That's because she does." Irina smiled softly thinking about how fast her little baby was growing and she carefully moved to place the baby in his arms.

Jack swayed carefully from side to side observing anything that might be new or different about her since he saw her four days ago.

"So you're trying to make her a Russian submariner now?" Jack laughed softly fingering her soft cotton outfit.

"That was a gift from the Captain." Irina sighed with a big smile, "He's quite taken with her already. Did you see the crib he had put in so she would be safe in her sleep?" She nodded towards the other end of the room and Jack smiled he had.

"It's beautiful and the inscription, too." He smiled and used his free hand to bring his lips to Irina's again. "I really missed you." Jack admitted, having not slept well at all the last few nights without his little security blanket nestled next to him or over him.

"Me too. I love you, I love you, I love you!" She peppered his lips with hers smiling. "We've got to go." She gave him one last languid kiss until they couldn't breathe before turning to leave and Jack caught her hand.

"Just one more." He breathed out quickly as his mouth captured hers once more stealing her breath and unable to get enough of her.

* * *

"So here we sit; where is our fearless leader?" Weiss smiled, around the table they were all tightly packed around.

This room's walls were covered in the same beautiful wooden slates casting a warm glow around the room with their soft yellows and reds.

"She'll be here momentarily." Sark smiled shyly passing water bottles around the table to everyone from a small refrigerator at the end of the room under a small bar.

'Russians and their bars!' They all thought laughing.

"Ok Sark, spill your guts. What do you know about this mysterious submarine?" Vaughn probed him for the information they all wanted.

"Yeah, spill it." Sydney grilled him with a small hint of a smile.

"I'm afraid I'm not at liberty to say. Why don't you ask Irina?" He gave her a small mysterious smile.

"Ask me what?" Irina smiled entering the room and hearing the last part of Sark's response. Jack followed behind her with the baby in his arms.

"Oh! Let me hold her!" Sydney's eyes lit up seeing her sister and her voice begged her father. Carefully, he passed the baby to her sister.

"Oh, I missed you." She inhaled her sisters' baby scent and cuddled her tightly.

"Sydney," Irina leaned over and kissed the side of Sydney's mouth with a smile having not gotten to say 'hello' to her daughter yet. "So what do you want to know?"

"What is the deal with this mysterious submarine?" Sydney raised her eyebrows looking at her with that adorable pouting face.

"The seven of you work for the CIA. So, if I tell you…you will be forced to put it into your reports. Correct?" Irina raised a challenging eyebrow at them as she took a seat.

A few grumbles and individual conversations followed for a few seconds before they all turned their attention back to her,

"We will leave out whatever you tell us. We'll report it as an Akula class." Sydney answered very diplomatically with a smart smile.

"Do I have your word?" Irina looked pointedly at all of them, internally smiling, knowing she was going to tell them anyway but loved to toy with them while she had the chance.

"Yes!" They all chimed together.

"Good, because I know where you all live and if this gets to your government. I'll know it was one of you!" She narrowed her eyebrows with a dangerous smile and Marshall gulped. "You don't recognize this submarine because it's fairly new to our fleet. The fastest, most silent running submarine in the world…including your new Virginia Class." Her eyes sparkled with amusement stunning them with her knowledge of their navy, "I bet that when we surfaced, you had no idea we'd been following directly under you all day? Did you?" She smiled, twisting off the cap to her water.

"No…no…they…we," Marshall swallowed hard again, shaking at being on board such a submarine by a country the United States used to fear. "Didn't see you until you blew out of the water in front of us. You weren't on our radar."

"Marshall!" Weiss elbowed him, "You just gave her confirmation that her submarine is undetectable to our Navy!"

"Oh shit!" Marshall sunk down in his seat and Irina laughed softly, taking a sip of water.

"It's alright, Marshall. You didn't tell me anything we didn't already know." Irina tried to ease the cute man's conscience. "We've known for quite sometime."

"How?" Marshall asked with narrowed eyebrows.

"You're not the only country with spies." She answered flatly, knowing it would strike a nerve taking another sip of water as they all looked around uncomfortable with that thought.

"Ok…we can accept that. Now you can please tell us…why we are on this sub?" Sydney picked the M&Ms out of the bowl of trail mix on the table, surprised to find such a food item on a Russian sub.

"Because we need to get there quickly and be undetectable." Irina grabbed a black remote and hit a button. A screen came out of the ceiling and she hit another button bringing up a topographical map. "We will surface here," She pointed to a spot with a red laser, just off the Libyan coast, "And come ashore here under the cover of darkness," She pointed again to a small valley that was an wash for flash floods in the desert. "We will hump it to the rendezvous point here, 11 miles from the coast where we will get the remaining supplies necessary to get to, and break into, the compound from my contact."

"Eleven miles." Marshall repeated softly, thinking he had no idea how the hell he was going to be able to make it that far trudging through the massive desert.

"From there we travel to this spot, and isolated location in the valley of the dunes where we will be safe to rest during the day without anyone seeing us." Her topographical map changed angles projecting the height and dips of the dunes and they all swallowed the hard lumps in their throats at the challenge a head of them.

Everyone except Jack, had left the interrogation room while Irina was getting the fine details from Zamir as it took hours. This was all going to be new information to them.

"On the second night, we will reach Sloane's compound located here, according to Zamir. It was built on a natural oasis, hidden amongst the dunes. Security…" She turned to look at them, "Is going to be tight. The entire complex is guarded by roaming patrols: 4 sets of 3 that make passes every twenty minutes. There are snipers on every corner of the roof and one in the middle of each wall. A giant atrium is on one end surrounding the plants of the oasis but Zamir said the glass is bullet and explosive proof. 50,000 volts of electricity run through the metal baring supporting the glass…certain death if we try to get in that way, its not an option. All other access points are like that of the NSA…they change every half hour to a different serial combination running off a server inside the mainframe of the complex. Marshall," She turned to him, "That is where you come in. We'll take out the patrols and snipers while you're hacking into the mainframe using the actual keypad in the door at the side of the compound. It has to be timed perfectly, or the entire complex goes into lock down and there is no way in…or out." She raised her eyebrows momentarily before continuing, "According to Zamir the compound is split into two separate spaces, connected by a series of hallways and tunnels. The back half with the atrium is the living quarters where Sloane lives. The front half is his laboratory…" She sighed thinking about what he was doing with that laboratory.

"It's also sleeping and living quarters to the 100 guards who patrol the complex internally and externally. Once we find the compound, we will send the exact GPS coordinates back to the CIA and from their they will task and In-fared satellite over our location…sending back a signal with images of body heat so we will all know where the people are located inside the compound. The special Kevlar I brought for everyone, has a therma-control source over the plates, that cools off body heat so all of our team will seem much cooler on the images. We don't want any friendly fire incidents among the chaos." She smiled lightly and got smiles in return. "We have two objectives: One is to capture Sloane and the other…is to find and destroy my eggs or any embryos he's already fertilized in the lab." Irina looked to the baby in Sydney's arms and then away. "We will arrive on the Libyan coast at 10:20 PM tomorrow evening…once the mission is completed, we will exit Libya by crossing the border into Egypt and my contact will bring us into Cairo where we will meet up with you, Carrie," Irina smiled softly at the young woman, "And Lena. There are three SVR agents on board who will take you to my home there, to wait for us and keep you safe. " She paused a moment, looking at her baby and then back to the young woman, "If we do not arrive by 10PM on Saturday night…my SVR Agents will escort you to Italy to leave the baby with Katya and Marcello,"  
She paused and watched the younger woman's eyes fill with fear and sadness as she looked around at all the faces of the people going on this dangerous mission, "From Rome, my Agents will escort you back to Los Angeles and make sure you arrive safely."

"How, how, how…will I know when to leave? If you, if you don't come back?" Carrie fidgeted nervously, not liking the idea at all.

"I've spoken with my Agents, they know what to do in the event we don't return. They will let you know." Irina gave her a small smile.

"But I plan on kickin-ass and takin' names, so I'm coming back!" Sydney smiled and everyone laughed, easing the tension in the room. "That evil ass-clown is getting what's coming to him! Who's with me now?"

"Hell yeah!" Weiss and Vaughn cheered and Jack, Irina and Dixon smiled and shook their heads with laughter.

"Now…who's hungry for dinner?" Irina smiled brightly standing.

* * *

"Now the Russian Navy, knows how to eat!" Weiss smiled, rubbing his full belly as they all headed back to their bunks for the night, "And the standard vodka with your meal?! I want to join this navy!" He laughed and Sydney poked him from behind playfully.

_***Holla If Ya Hear Me (The Rebel)***_

"Oh my God…do you hear that?" He stopped suddenly causing everyone to run into each other. "It's Tupac! On a Russian submarine!" He started laughing hysterically as they continued walking into the crew's quarters and the music grew louder.

The Russian sailors were all in their bunks, some standing on the side, getting ready for bed, talking and jamming out to Tupac. The sailors immediately ceased talking to look at the group of 'invaders' onto their sub, looking at them curiously and with fascination knowing they were all CIA Agents save the blonde one who arrived with the Tsar.

"Howdy!" Weiss smiled widely waving at the hundreds of eyes looking at them, without moving. "Tupac rules!" He shouted after a second when no one answered him and his proclamation elicited a few heavily accented enthusiastic 'Yeahs!' as they shouted back with smiles.

"Ah Tupac, breaking cultural barriers everywhere!" Vaughn laughed gripping Sydney's shoulders from behind as the walked single file through the passage saying 'Da svidanya' to everyone with smiles. Suddenly everyone started whispering and it was like a rolling wave through the bunks as they pointed their eyes and fingers at Sydney.

Sydney immediately felt the eyes on her and smiled shyly.

"Grand Duchess Sydney, I think they recognize you." Weiss whispered in singsong voice over his shoulder to Sydney directly behind him. "Say hello to your people."

"I am!" She smiled back, speaking through clenched teeth.

Suddenly, the curious faces turned to smiles and small waves, some embarrassed, bashful, blushing from those young males who already formed crushes on the their new Duchess.

They made it to their bunks and all climbed in, chatting and laughing, hanging over the sides and teasing one another like they were all at camp and not about to set out on a dangerous mission.

"Carrie's getting the best deal here." Weiss teased her and her head came flying out of her bunk to look at him and he laughed, "She gets to stay on board this bad-ass submarine, move into the Captains quarters and then hang out in Cairo at Irina's lavish pad checking out the pyramids, Nile and Kasbahs."

"Oh yeah right! I'm just in charge of the care of Russia's tiniest Grand Duchess on pins and needles until Saturday night at 10PM when you all come strolling in!" Carrie huffed and got the entire group to laugh. "You better all come back or I'm going to come find you and kick all your corpses ass'!" They burst into a thunderous laugh with her dead serious fighting tone.

"I fully intend on coming back." Sydney looked defiantly against the ceiling of her small bunk, staring at its gray paint before rolling on her side and reaching her hand over the side to find Vaughn's. "I'm getting married in August." She smiled brightly and everyone went 'awe' at the happy couple holding hands above them.

"Are you going to keep that tradition and wear your Mom's smokin' dress?" Weiss looked up at her and waggled his eyebrows up at Vaughn.

"No, are you kidding?" Sydney giggled eyes wide open, "I'm a size 6! When we went to try on dresses she was like 1 and 2! There is no way I could squeeze into that dress."

"Holy shit!" Carrie chimed in, "I think I was that in like 4th grade! And those damn legs of hers go on forever! Not fair I say!"

"Well, she never used to be that tiny. Not when I was little, I mean she was probably the size I am now." Sydney sighed and propped her head up on her bent elbow, everyone listening with rapt fascination hearing about Irina and Sydney."I said something to her about that one day a few weeks ago, about how quickly she lost the baby weight, if she even had any to begin with…and how tiny she is now." Her brown eyes filled with sadness, "She told me that she can't keep weight on now…after solitary… in Kashmir when they starved her. They only fed her once every 10 to 12 days for 10 months and then when they did feed her, she couldn't keep it down…her body would reject it…It really fucked up her thyroid." Her tone became hard with anger.

"Son-of-a-bitch." Weiss grumbled and rolled over with his hand on his belly, "I cannot imagine not eating for 12 days, let alone keeping that up for a year. I don't know how she's still alive."

"Well, she almost wasn't. You know, we all know. We all saw the tape of what she looked like when she came out." Sydney felt tears stinging her eyes and refused to let them out, "Nothing but skin and bones…literally. Mom said that after awhile…the hunger stops and you just feel 'nothing.' She said she weighed 67 lbs when she was finally released from solitary."

They all remained silent for a moment thinking about it, especially Sark, who was still new to learning this information on Irina; which was odd being the one to know her the longest out of everyone; including her husband, Jack.

"The way she described dying today, what it felt like…Lethal Injection," Vaughn said softly, feeling the hair stand up on his arms, "That's got to be the most surreal experience for her, to die and come back to life."

"No wonder she was confused when she first came to in the hospital." Sydney sniffled remembering what Irina had said today, and a tear coursed down her face and straight into her hair as she lay on her back.

"No shit…I'd be freaked out, too, watching my soul leave my body behind and then wandering around in the dark waiting for the demons or angels to take you 'home." Weiss shivered at the thought before rolling on his side to look up at Sydney again, "Did she ever tell you…who came for her? Surely the angels, I mean, yeah she's done some bad shit but we all have. That doesn't mean we should go to hell. Right?"

"She never talks about it." Sydney sighed, "But she did ask my dad once right after, if he wanted to know what Heaven looked like. So, I guess it was the angels." She smiled softly.

"So what does Heaven look like?" Marshall rolled over onto his stomach and looked up Sydney and Dixon held his, breath, wanting to hear about the place his wife was now.

"I don't know. I've never asked her."

"And your dad didn't tell you what she told him?" Weiss furrowed his eyebrows.

"My dad doesn't know. He told her…'some other time," Sydney took a deep breath, wiping the stinging salty tear tracks. "I think he's scared to ask her about it. Reminds him of how close he came to losing her again and he doesn't want to think about it."

"Well, its obvious he's protective of her," Vaughn smiled quietly, "I mean look at the way he beat the crap out of Zamir today."

"Yeah, no kidding, I can't imagine what he's going to do to Sloane or Cuvee now." Weiss turned onto his back again. "He almost killed Zamir with just his fists for 'almost' hurting Irina. Those two bastards," He shook his head, not wanting to think about the images of Irina in Kashmir.

"I think that's the point. Why he's so protective of her now." Sydney sniffled and moved onto her side again, "He still feels so helpless and blames himself for not realizing she was still alive, for not being able to save her in Kashmir. I mean that has to haunt him, it haunts me, and she was screaming 'his' name for help and all he could do was sit there and watch a twenty year old tape of the events."

"I want to rip that fucker's eyes out!" Weiss pounded his fist into the ceiling above him thinking about Cuvee. "He's next on our list of major ass- whoop-ins'! Sorry Mike," He apologized realizing the ceiling he just hit was the bottom of Vaughn's bed.

"You tear out his eyes, and I'll rip off his balls and make him eat them." Vaughn crinkled his brow, his heart heavy for both Irina and Sydney who was sniffling on the bunk beside him, and he was angry at the man that caused the pain and tears.

"I'm going to cut his dick off and shove it in his now open eye socket!" Sydney's voice was hard as glass and her comment elicited a small round of laughter.

"I'm going to hold him down for Irina. Let her extract her long deserved revenge from him." Sark said quietly, lying on his stomach with his arms bunching up his pillow.

"I'll help you." Dixon added softly.

"Me too." Weiss gave Sark a small smile.

"Sloane's first up to bat." Sydney turned on her side again. "He's going to pay for lying to me when he recruited me, for lying to my Dad about my Mom being dead when she wasn't, for killing Danny." She sniffled again and Vaughn reached across the small divided to hold her hand, for support, "For lying to all of us at SD-6, for trying to kill my Mom and sell Lena on the Black Market, for stealing her eggs."

"For killing my Diane." Dixon felt the anger rising inside him.

"For manipulating me into sending my Allison into this mess...who killed your wife for him," Sark admitted and gave a look of apology to Dixon, "And for suggesting Sydney's friend be killed and replace with my Allison…and manipulating me into turning on Irina. For hurting her…and her family." He added so quietly they almost didn't hear him.

"Yes, he's going to pay." Sydney said resolutely.

* * *

Irina lay on the small twin bed, on her side with her blouse hanging off of her as Lena lay beside her, nursing and falling fast asleep as Irina inspected her every part with a smile. She had taken her hair down and it fell in a wave around her shoulders and bent elbow supporting her head. She'd already lost her black boots and her shirt and skirt would soon be joining them. She heard the water in the cabin's bathroom turn off and realized Jack was finished showering.

He quickly wrapped a towel around his waist and opened the door and his breath caught staring at Irina and their baby.

"You're so beautiful…" He smiled softly taking in the scene before him.

"You're not so hard on the eyes either…" She smiled appreciatively at her husband, drinking in his beautiful body.

Jack laughed softly and walked towards them, sitting on the edge of the little bed and palming the baby's head softly, running his thumb over her soft hair that was starting to curl slightly.

He leaned in slowly, with his eyes locked on Irina's and met her with his kiss. "I love you…" He smiled and stood to get some clothes on and Irina caught his hand.

"I love you too…" She flashed him her beautiful smile that turned seductive, "And don't bother putting clothes on…I planned on taking them off of you anyway."

"Ooh, alright…but you're wearing entirely too many clothes." He smiled, laughing softly.

"Well I won't be soon…" She cocked her eyebrow and gave him a naughty grin. Irina disengaged herself from the sleeping baby and kissed her little head softly before rolling into a sitting position and softly scooping Lena up into her arms.

Jack gave her his hand to help pull her off the bed.

"Thank you." She smiled and stepped around him to place the baby in her little crib, covering her with her soft plink blanket and whispering into her ear in Russian, "Sweet Dreams." She turned to stand directly in front of Jack with a gleam in her eye and slowly slid her shirt off of her shoulders, letting it pool on the floor behind her as Jack's breathing picked up.

Two of her long fingers guided her bra strap over one shoulder and then the next, letting it fall at her feet as her smile grew watching Jack swallow hard. Her hands went behind her back and slowly unzipped her skirt and the sound seemed to thunder in their ears in the silence of the room. Her thumbs laced beneath her waistband and slid to her sides, shimming the material and her underwear past her hips and to the floor where she stepped out of them and closed the distance between she and Jack.

_***Take My Breath Away***_

Her erect nipples brushing lightly against his chest with their close proximity to one another. Jack inhaled a soft but sharp breath and Irina wrapped her fingers into the soft cotton towel, pulling lightly on the fabric, releasing it and letting it fall to the floor with her clothes. Her hands moved to his arms and softly, traced the contours of his muscles. She leaned forward slightly and placed and languid kiss into the base of his throat and Jack moaned softly.

Irina's hands moving up his shoulders to his neck and threading into his hair, as her fingers played with the wet curls at the base of neck. Her kisses moving slowly towards his ear and Jack closed his eyes reveling in her touch and the feel of her body pressed against his.

"Take my breath away." She whispered huskily into his ear and Jack scooped her up into his arm, his lips capturing hers in a heated kiss with his tongue swooping into her mouth and claiming it as his own.

He walked slowly towards the little bed and laid her gently on it, their mouths connected as he climbed over her, his weight resting on his forearms as his body settled between her inviting legs. Her tongue fought back and pushed its way into his mouth, forcing him to surrender as she took control over his mouth. His bottom lip covered in small kisses between lips, sucking, biting and laving in and out of his mouth teasing his tongue with its brief touches. His mouth pulled away and moved to her jaw-line, placing gentle kisses along it and eliciting small gasps from Irina when he kissed her most sensitive spots with brushes of his hot tongue and her inflamed skin. His tongue darted out to trace the contours of her ear and nibbled softly on her earlobe, pulling it into his mouth and sucking lightly as he began moving slowing against her, their bodies rubbing together as his hardness grazed over her lower abdomen making them both shiver in anticipation.

Irina's hands were greedy to touch him and moved down his back with light touches and over his firm behind, circling behind his thighs around to the front and stroking the skin around his member lightly feeling his muscles contracting with his soft rocking motion. Her lithe fingers reached for his shaft and wrapped around its length one finger at a time causing Jack to inhale sharply and arch slightly when she began stroking him in time with his soft thrusts. Her left hand sliding between his legs to cup him and caress the skin behind his balls with light pressure rapidly bringing Jack to full readiness as the speed of his rocking increased, moaning into her neck with the nerves she was lighting on fire.

Wanting to return the feeling, his mouth and flaming tongue moved down her chest placing sensual kisses down the line of her scar and over her breasts as he rocked back slightly on his heels, pulling his shaft away from her grip. His tongue making small languid circles around her sensitive areolas, closing his mouth over the entire nipple of one breast while his hand softly massaged the other, his thumb flicking and pinching its peak while his tongue and teeth tortured the other.

Irina shivered under his touch and threaded her fingers into his hair as his mouth moved down again, his sweltering tongue swirling into and out of her naval, tasting the taut skin around it. His opened mouthed kisses, nipping and laving softly at her skin working their way down her body and dragging his tongue along the length of the scar stretching across her abdomen from where he'd shot her. His hands caressing down the length of her body, gently kneading his fingers into her contours as his mouth kissed and greeted every inch of her flesh. She tugged lightly on his head and pulled his mouth back to hers, wrapping her arms around his neck and back and one leg around his hips.

"I need you now…" Her brown eyes pierced his and rocked her body into his groin. "Please…" She begged into his mouth as her tongue flicked the roof of his mouth and pulled back to suck his lip and trace its curves with her magical tongue. He slid one hand down her body as he balanced his weight on his knees and one forearm.

His strong hands splaying over her hip and caressing over the protruding bone, he dipped his hips, rubbing his rock hard shaft against her wetness for a few thrusts before plunging in and smothering her screams of pleasure with his mouth. Her body convulsed against the intruder, squeezing him rapidly as she adjusted his size and let him slide in further. His hand pulling up on her hip, guiding her leg up to wrap around him.

Irina locked her legs around his waist and hips, hanging suspended from his body and he pushed himself up on his arms, straddling her shoulders with his arms and began rocking into her making them both gasp and moan. His length sliding easily in and out of her hot core with Irina's muscles clenching him in their own rhythm that complimented his. The tilt and angle of their hips allowing him to penetrate her deeply and he felt her shudder every time he was fully inside her, filling her completely as she trembled beneath him with her growing excitement. His pace increased as she gripped him like a glove pulling his orgasm out of him every time he pulled back and almost out, before driving backing into her warmth.

"I love you." He whispered, panting as he looked down into her swirling brown depths and Irina pulled her legs tighter around him, pulling them as close together as they could be.

"I love you, Jack." She leaned her head up and seized his lips, moaning into his mouth feeling his length penetrating her very soul, rubbing her just the right angle and igniting her nerve bundles deep within her body. Her moans turned to panting mews and his to grunts to groans as they push each other towards their climax. His speed became fluid pounding and his depth was stealing her breath.

"Oh God, Irina." He grunted into her with his eyes screwing shut as her body enveloped his entire length and gripped him like a vice pushing him further towards the edge.

"Jack!" She inhaled sharply trying to steal a breath before her body rocked with her explosion and Jack swallowed the screaming of his name as her body pulsed and trembled around him.

Tears escaping her eyes and rolling into her silky dark hair as she rode the waves of pleasure and Jack kept up his pace, thrusting into her deeply and grunting loudly as he spilled his essence inside body, moaning against her mouth and suckling on her tongue and lips as his shaft continued to stroke her internally until they had nothing left.

He dropped onto his forearms but remained hovering over her, panting heavily and searching her face.

"Hey." He reached the back of his hand up to wipe away her tears with a soft smile and tone, "Why are you crying?"

Irina kept her legs locked around him, holding him inside as she continued to tremble. "Because, I love you so much. I'm just so happy to be home." She whispered softly, with shaking breath looking into his beautiful loving eyes.

Jack's heart skipped a beat and breath caught looking down at the beautiful woman who was his wife, seeing the love and adoration she had for him shining through her tear filled eyes and slowly, he dipped his lips to caress hers; his tongue gently laving along the length of her bottom lip before seeking admittance inside.

Irina wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed his head to hers.

"I would rather die than live without you again." Jack whispered into her face as his eyes poured into hers. "I love you, Irina."

When they finally fell asleep, Irina was sprawled on top of him, her arms and legs straddling his body, her head on his chest and long mane flowing over his shoulder and arm as he kept her nestled tightly against him beneath their blankets. Her slight weight was a warming welcome after spending too many nights without her in his arms.


	46. Chapter 46

**_AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Flower by Moby, Blue Monday by Orgy._**

* * *

FORTY-SIX

o

Jack walked into the Captains cabin at 9:30PM the following night and smiled, watching Irina getting dressed and laughed softly.

"What are you laughing at?" She turned to face him as she pulled her black cargo pants up her long legs. Standing in nothing but her sports bra, underwear and now pants.

"I was beginning to wonder if you owned any regular underwear anymore or if you just always wore thongs or went commando?" He snickered watching her black cotton panties disappear as she zipped up her pants, sitting on the bed, all ready dressed in his black fatigues.

"Of course I do!" Irina laughed back at him, adjusting her belt. "You've got to have something breathable and comfortable on under fatigues silly." Her accent thickened with her words and the sparkle in her eye teasing him. Her body was rippling with hard curves down her arms, back and abs and he motioned her with his fingers to come to him after watching her pull the black formfitting shirt over her head and down her body. "What?" She asked coyly walking to stand in front of him as her hands swooped behind her head, pulling her long hair out from the back of her shirt.

Jack's fingers danced at the shirts hemline and his face held a naughty smile as he inched the fabric up, kissing each section of her protruding abdominals, following their indentions with his tongue and making her laugh and her body swirl with desire.

"Jack, you have to stop that or we'll never leave this cabin." She cupped his head with a smile and ran her fingernails over his scalp.

"I can't help it; you're just so tempting." He placed on last, soft kiss just above her belly button and lightly pulled her shirt down, looking up at her with a mischievous grin. "I'll let you finish now."

"Thank you." She smiled brightly and bent to kiss his lips quickly, continuing to tuck her shirt in.

"Where's your Kevlar?" Jack narrowed his eyebrow at her.

"In the storage room with yours and everyone elses!" She used her teacher tone with him, kneeling down to lace up her boots.

"Just checking." Jack grinned at her with a shrug, "I have to protect my heart after all." It was true, she owned his heart and it was tangled inside with her own.

"The same goes for you!" She stood and wrapped her arm around his neck pressing the other hand over his heart, "Take care of mine." She smiled and dropped her mouth to his.

"You ready?" He whispered into her face.

"As I'll ever be." She smiled, kissing once more quickly then backed up, slinging her black backpack of clothes on her back and scooping up Lena out of the crib, nuzzling her face into the crook of the baby's neck.

Jack followed her out and through the submarine to the storage room where their gear was being stowed.

_***Flower***_

"Ok, does everyone have everything?" Irina asked the group standing around her as she finished strapping her holsters to her legs. She pulled a magazine and slammed it into the base of each weapon before securing them on the sides of her thighs.

Sydney and Vaughn shared a glance, having seen those guns…those holsters before when she helped them in that hallway in Mexico City. Fighting with her in hand-to-hand combat on the same side was going to be interesting.

"We're ready." Sydney smiled with a nod looking at the group a massed wearing all black, with faces painted to match and Kevlar in place, weapons ready. Irina grabbed a metal case from one shell and removed two syringes, one with an orange cap, the other with a blue; both filled with clear liquid and no one had any idea what they were for.

"What is that for, Mom?" Sydney narrowed her eyebrows watching Irina secure the syringes in her vest pocket.

"Just in case, Sydney." Irina looked up at her with a hint of sadness, hoping she wouldn't have to use them. Seeing the look on her daughter's face, she needed to explain more, "In case Sloane's already found a surrogate and implanted an embryo." She added softly, looking away as she spoke and Sydney swallowed hard looking to her father who had the same expression.

Jack reached into his own bag and retrieved seven small black pouches handing them to everyone on the team except Irina. The curious group looked inside with wide-eyes.

"What's that for?" Irina furrowed her own brows curiously as Jack handed her the last one. She opened the small pouch and discovered it was thermally insulated with dry ice and inside was a bottle of insulin and four syringes. She looked up surprised when she saw that everyone on the team had the same items.

"My 'just in case." Jack raised his eyebrows expectantly with a small smile, looking at her and everyone else. "Just in case, for whatever reason any of us happen to get separated with you," His eyes flashed to hers, "And you need insulin, we will all be ready."

She gave him a small smile shaking her head as he took the pouch out of her hand and pushed it into another small pocket on her vest.

He was right, it was a smart move to make but she was lovingly astonished at how far her husband had thought ahead in concerns to her safety. She had already secured her own supply and now he was adding to it.

Sydney inhaled deeply and Vaughn saw the concern as they all secured the pouches inside their vests. It absolutely made sense what Jack had done, but it also scared Sydney; everyone a little to realize how dangerous being the field was for her mother now.

Irina reached up and kissed Jack's lips, cupping his face and smiling.

"Thank you." She reached down and pulled on her black pack and secured the black band Com around her neck and fastened in her earpiece, all of them doing the same. She walked over Carrie holding Lena and took the baby out of her arms with a smile, holding her close and whispering her love and how much she would miss her into her little ear, kissing her little face, hands and head repeatedly, not wanting to say 'goodbye,' knowing there was always the possibility it would be the last.

Everyone stood quietly, hands on weapons watching Irina looking stealthy and ninja-like, holding the tiny baby in pink with such a mother's love, such a contrast.

She handed her back to Carrie with a tinge of unshed tears and smiled warmly at the young woman and her baby. "I love you, Lena." She whispered in Russian and bent over kissing the baby once more and making her smile, and wiggle in Carrie's arms. "Thank you…Ms. Bowman." Irina smiled warmly at the woman who would be looking after her baby.

"I'll take very good care of her, I promise." Carrie shifted the baby in her arms with a serious smile.

"I know you will." Irina placed her hand on Carrie's forearm with a smile. "We'll see you Saturday." She kissed Lena's little foot one more time and Jack and Sydney stepped up to say their own 'goodbye,' before they left the room…every member of the team had kissed her 'goodbye' feeling this little baby was their lucky charm.

_***Won't Back Down***_

Single file following Irina and with heads held high they walked to the bridge as every sailor stopped to salute Irina as she passed, in awe of their fearless, beautiful leader who was equal parts loving and fierce.

"Are you ready, Empress?" The Captain smiled at the group assembled before him.

"Yes, Captain…proceed." She smiled and bit her lip nervously watching Carrie strap Lena into her car seat and give the baby her pacifier.

"Prepare to blow!" The Captain commanded to the CO and the command rang out around the control room.

"Aye, aye Captain, Prepare to blow!"

"Hang on." Irina looked back at her team and grabbed the bars above them.

"Surfacing now, Sir." The pilot called out and the submarine rapidly started angling back at a sharp angle and the incredible speed and pressure making all their ears pop with the depth change.

"350 meters…325 meters…300 meters…275 meters…250 meters…225 meters…200 meters…" The co-pilot called out their depths as the sub launched toward the surface creaking and moaning with the intense pressure outside.

"100 meters…50 meters!" The pilot called out excitedly.

"Hang on tight! This is going to be a ride!" The Captain smiled back at the group of Agents.

Their eyes going wide with anticipation and then the sudden jolt as the sub broke the surface, launching part way out of the air and splashing heavily down on the sea again.

"Whoa!" They all chorused together, Russian and Americans with big smiles at the rush of such power.

"Empress Irina, always a pleasure." The Captain kissed her hand with a smile, "I'll see the Duchess to Cairo. Please be safe, ma'am." He stood to attention, as did every Russian officer and sailor on deck and with his command, everyone saluted her and held it.

"Thank you, Captain. It's always a pleasure to ride with the pride of our fleet." She smiled back and returned the salute. The Russians held their salutes until she turned her back and then remained at attention until she was gone.

The big black hatch was opened and one by one they climbed out onto the top of submarine in the black of night, rolling on the dark sea. Groups of Russian sailors were inflating the rubber boat that would take them to shore and when it was ready, they pushed away from the submarine and watched as the Russian sailors remained at attention saluting until they were lost in the darkness.

The sky was partly cloudy and every now and then the clouds would break and let the beautiful full moon cascade down onto them and the gorgeous water.

_***Blue Monday***_

The Mediterranean Sea was fairly calm and they rolled quietly into the sands of Libya without much sound.

When everyone had exited the boat, they drug it up onto the sand and Irina pulled out a knife and slashed it to pieces before they buried it shallowly in the sand.

"Let's go." She pressed the Com on her neck speaking quietly, with weapons ready they crept into the desert night. Irina leading the way with her GPS positioning device, they trudged up the wash and into the giant dunes of the vast desert with determined pace. The sand was deep and their muscles burned as they climbed one dune and descended the other side only face another mountain of sand in front of them. The desert was cold at night and slight breeze was blowing sand particles into their skin, making it sting.

"Ok, let's take a break for a few minutes." She paused and waved them down on the far side of a dune, hiding in its shadows from the moonlight. "We're almost there."

"Oh, Thank God!" Marshall and Weiss chorused simultaneously, happy to get a break after hours of hiking up and down enormous sand dunes.

Irina crouched and pulled out her water bottle and a Power Bar to keep her sugar up. The others did the same, enjoying the short reprieve.

"How many miles do you think we've gone?" Vaughn, sipped greedily at his water looking at Irina as she pulled up her shirt enough to inject insulin.

"Five…but with the dunes, probably ten." She sighed, pushing in the plunger. "We're a little more then half way."

"Another ten miles in the sand?" Marshall rolled his eyes and collapsed back onto the warm sand that had held onto the day's sunlight. "I think I am just going to start rolling down the far side of the dunes." He huffed out and everyone laughed softly, mindful of where they were.

"So how many times have you taken trips on submarines, Mom?" Sydney smiled over at Irina, still surprised with that part of their journey, eating her own snack and drinking water. "The Captain made it sound like you are a regular."

"No." Irina laughed, digging her hand into the warm sand with a smile, "Not a regular. I've been on a submarine maybe, five times in my life, including this last voyage."

"What were the other trips for?" Sydney sipped at her water staring intently at her mother as a beam of moonlight struck her face putting her in the spotlight

"Well…excluding this trip I was onboard for experimental and training purposes and then her maiden voyage a couple of years ago or so." Irina paused cupping a handful of sand and letting it flow through her fingers. "My first time on a submarine was after my extraction, taking me back to Russia." She concentrated on the feel of the warm sand and the way it felt slipping between her fingers, remembering those horrible days.

"They took you back to Russia on a submarine?" Sydney's eyes were wide as were everyone else's and Marshall sat back up again, looking intently at Irina. "How?"

"The night of the accident." She sighed, collecting herself, "Kashinau and I boarded a Russian cargo ship, that was disguised as Japanese cargo ship… out of Long Beach. On the second day at sea we met with a Soviet submarine and boarded. They took us the remaining distance back to Russia under the Pacific. Took eight very long days." Her eyes flashed up to Jack's with sadness.

"How come my father went through Mexico…and you went on submarine across the sea?" Vaughn asked quietly, curious.

"Two reasons." Irina opened her Power Bar and ran her hair over her ear. "Your father went through Mexico and then to Cuba where he took a flight to Moscow. It was much faster and…he wasn't a risk, I was. He wasn't going back to go to prison. I was." She sighed quietly, "Kashinau had to be extracted as well, in order to bring me back. They couldn't risk me escaping…the ship in Long Beach was closest and they figured once they had me out to sea and then trapped under it with an entire crew of Soviet submariners. I wasn't going anywhere. There wasn't anywhere to go." She looked up with a forced smile and shrugged. "From there we boarded a plane to Moscow and Kashinau let me see my father before they arrested me."

"Mom, I'm sorry." Sydney felt terrible for bringing up a painful subject.

Irina's hand immediately left the sand and cupped Sydney's head with a genuine smile, "Don't be, Sweetheart. It's ok. It's just the facts."

"That bastard Kashinau." Sydney shook her head with anger at the man who had forced her mother back to Russia, "I'm glad you shot him."

"You shot him?" Sark's eyes went wide looking at Irina. She had told him the CIA had killed him.

"Yes." Irina met his eyes nodding her head slowly knowing that had to have surprised him. "I let him live long enough…for the pain he caused in my life. Extracting me against my will, taking me to prison…treating me like his own machine, forcing me to shoot my daughter," Irina inhaled her anger and looked away momentarily disgusted by the man, "Congratulating me as he deemed that… 'his' success in re-educating me in Kashmir with Cuvee…That was the last straw…he had Sydney trapped in Barcelona…so shot him." Her eyes went back to Sark's, "I'm sorry I lied to you, Julian. But I couldn't tell you then…I couldn't risk Cuvee finding out I'd turned on them."

"No, I understand." Sark said quietly, taking a sip of his water, "I never liked the man very much…never liked the way he treated you."

The man had treated Irina like she was his personal puppet and sex object that he could leer at anytime he wanted to, make discriminating sexual comments too with Cuvee when Irina left the room and Sark was still present.

"I'm glad it was you who shot him. I'm sure it surprised the hell out of him. I would have like to seen the look on his face."

Irina gave him a quick smile of appreciation.

"Well, I was there." Sydney gave her Mom a half smile, and turned her eyes to Sark, "Absolute shock was the look on his face, that Mom had shot him instead of me. Right in the chest. Perfect aim."

"We better get going." Irina stood and brushed the sand off of her with a smile, slinging her backpack over her shoulders. She started walking down the sand dune and Jack caught up to her quickly, wrapping one arm around her neck to momentarily bring her closer to him so that he could kiss her head. He didn't need to say anything.

"I love you, Jack. Never forget that." She said softly and he grabbed her arm forcing her to stop and the others' to slow way down, seeing the look in Jack's eyes and the way he had stopped Irina.

"Why are you telling me that?" Jack's heartbeat quickened with flashing concern as the last time she added that it was because she knew she was leaving him. "Irina, we're going to make it out of this. I am not losing you again. Don't even think that way."

"I just wanted you to know, Jack. I don't plan on going anywhere." She smiled up at him, taking his hand in hers. "Thinking about my extraction, being reminded of my time in prison. I remembered all the thoughts I had. Thoughts they made me believe. That you would come to hate me, believe my love for you was a lie. I just needed to say it now."

Jack let out the breath he was holding in, relieved and tortured all at the same time.

"I love you too, Irina." His eyes found hers in the darkness as he whispered to her, the slight breeze making a few wisps of hair blow in front of her face and he reached up to tuck them behind her ear. "You never forget that." He smiled back at her and dropped a quick kiss to her lips, going in for seconds and making the others laugh behind them.

They trudged on over the dunes for a few more hours, breathless and exhausted, their leg muscles burning and tired.

"Ok, this is it." Irina looked down at her GPS with a smile and dropped to her knees, trying to stay low. "And we're ahead of schedule."

"Oh God…my legs are burning!" Marshall dropped right behind her. "I'm so tired."

Irina turned around and patted his knee with a soft smile, knowing this technical wizard was not used to fieldwork this intense.

"Take a break for awhile. I'm going to check the perimeter to look for him." She smiled again and jumped right back up, slinging her gun strap around her shoulder, "Jack, will you come with me, please?" She waited with her beautiful smile in place as Jack jumped up behind her. "All of you stay put. If he sees you before me, he will shoot!" She looked at them pointedly with raised eyebrows.

"I bet they're going to go make-out in the sand." Weiss whispered with a smile once Jack and Irina disappeared over the ridge into the darkness.

"Stop it! They are not!" Sydney furrowed her eyebrows trying not to laugh and shaking her head.

"Syd…technically, this is their honeymoon and we are trudging through the Libyan desert in Africa. I think if they want a little time to kiss and make-out in the sand its perfectly allowable." Weiss defended Jack and Irina with a smile as he leaned back against his pack in the sand.

"Stop." Jack grabbed Irina's arm with a smile once they cleared the ridge, "I have to kiss you properly. I haven't done so in too many hours."

"I agree." Irina smiled seductively and wrapped her arms and gun around Jack as her mouth captured his with searing tongues battling for connection and unable to get enough of the other.

Finally they broke apart when they had to breathe and Irina placed two quick kisses on his lips with a smile.

"That was just what I needed." She flashed her brilliant smile and turned from him continuing around the dune and leaving Jack staring breathless for a moment before catching up.

"Jack," Irina said softly, gripping the AK-47 in her hand as her eyes scanned the horizon. "I wanted to tell you, who the contact of mine is we're meeting. It's Dubey." She turned her eyes to his, cautiously, remembering what had happened at their last encounter with the man.

Jack swallowed hard and looked away a moment. He really had no desire to ever meet this man face to face. Just seeing him on the beach mauling Irina that day in Jakarta was enough. He looked back and nodded and he saw the brief flash of sadness cross Irina's face before she looked away.

"I trust you, Irina." He said softly, holding his stare until her eyes slowly came back to his. Her black depths found his and felt the weight lift instantly giving him a smile.

"Thank you." She smiled softly and turned back to the horizon looking for a sign of Dubey.

"But if he hits you again I'm going to knock him out." Jack added seriously, cracking a grin when her eyes flashed back to his in surprise and then a smile seeing his.

"There he is." Irina pointed with her finger behind Jack and down the dune a ways. She clicked out Morris code with her flashlight and it was answered by Dubey.

"Mountaineer, proceed northwest and down the dune. We've found the contact." Jack pressed his fingers into his neck, activating the black Com there.

"Roger that. On the move." Sydney answered him back and the troops stood, brushing off sand and grabbing their weapons on high alert. They marched over the dune and found Jack and Irina about half way down the enormous slope on the other side waiting for them. Like a flock of ravens, they moved through the night across the sand in a V-formation with Irina as the point.

Irina approached Dubey and two of his men first as the others hung back giving them distance.

"Irina." Dubey greeted her with a kiss to both cheeks after he jumped over the side of one of the jeeps. "Good to see you again. I've got everything you asked for." He smiled, not willing to relinquish her hand just yet.

"Thank you again, Vijay, for finding Zamir and helping me now." Irina slowly pulled back on her hand and the man released it. "I know you took a great risk with your Libyan contacts to meet us."

"It's very dangerous, Irina, are you certain about doing this? Just a few people taking on an entire compound." Dubey's eyes going over her shoulder to the people in the shadows he could barely see.

"We may be few, but we are mighty." She smiled warmly, yet dangerously, "We will be fine." She turned and motioned for them to come closer. "Vijay Dubey, I would like to introduce you to a few people. You already know Mr. Sark." She smiled seeing them approach and Sark nodded at Dubey in acknowledgment, "Agents, Dixon, Weiss, Flinkman, and Vaughn." She named them off as she went around the half circle, "My daughter, Agent Bristow." She smiled at Sydney and saw Dubey's surprise out of the corner of her eye.

"Well, this is certainly a surprise. It's pleasure to meet the daughter of Irina Derevko." Dubey smiled widely at Sydney, taking in her resilient beauty in his surprise.

"And my husband…Agent Bristow." She smiled widely at Jack who stood defiantly tall and intimidating dressed in black and strapped with weapons. He looked damn sexy.

Dubey's eyes were wide and he swallowed the knot in this throat hearing her say 'husband' as the two men stood sizing each other up. '_So this is the man who stole her heart?_' He looked over Jack and they both remained silent for a moment.

"Husband?" He turned his gaze to Irina, giving her a small smile through his shock before stepping towards Jack, extending his hand, "Jack Bristow…Congratulations. You are a lucky man. Your…wife," Dubey raised his eyebrows as it sounded funny on his tongue, "It's an exceptional woman."

Jack accepted his hand and they both squeezed painfully hard.

"Thank you and I'm well aware of how fortunate I am." Jack stepped towards Irina, in a possessive move with his straight face and sharp voice.

"You seem oddly familiar." Dubey was searching Jack's face, something about it was sparking a memory.

"Perhaps…Mr. Dubey," Jack looked him dead in the eyes, his tone lethal and everyone stood perfectly still watching the exchange. "Your mind is recalling that day on the beach in Jakarta." Jack had been waiting for the opportunity and Dubey gave it to him.

Sark's eyes were wide in wonder having no idea about what they were talking about.

"You were in Jakarta?" Dubey's eyebrows went up and he took a step back from Irina, his mind flashing through the images of that day. The kiss, how he was touching Irina, holding her…the baby…the three men in suits who were her guards. "Her security detail… There were three of you but only two at the restaurant."

_'Oh boy…_' Irina sighed, this could get ugly and she hoped Jack would keep his cool.

"That's correct. I stayed at home with _our_ daughters." Jack remained frozen and stone still, though he emphasized 'our', "Though I must say, I was terribly disappointed when my wife came home with a swollen split cheek and lip from where you hit her, Mr. Dubey."

_"Ohhhh shit!_" Weiss hissed under his breath.

"He hit Irina?" Sark asked quietly to Vaughn and he nodded that Dubey had. "Bastard."

"I didn't know she was married then, Agent Bristow." Dubey swallowed hard thinking about her going home to the man before him that night, battered and bleeding from their game.

Jack cocked his eyebrow at the man, "What does being married have to do with hitting a woman? If she wasn't my wife, it would still be unacceptable."

"Apparently, Agent Bristow, you don't understand the game. _Our_ game got a bit rough…it does sometimes," The man smiled with a dangerous gleam in his eyes, emphasize 'our' and reminding Jack that he had been with Irina, too. "She broke my nose and dislocated my arm."

"Well, if she hadn't I would have." Jack broke his icy stare from him and turned to smile at Irina, hearing for the first time what she had done to Dubey for hitting her.

"It's good to know that the man who holds her heart, is protective of it." Dubey, said after a moment of watching Irina's eyes dance looking into her husband's. She was happy. What he had said he wanted for her. "Irina," He turned his gaze back to her, "You should get going. There are only a few more hours of darkness for cover and you need to be in the deep dunes before the sun breaks." He gave her a small smile and turned, speaking in Arabic and motioning for his men to get into his jeep, leaving the two with supplies for Irina."I'll meet you back here Saturday morning to take you into Egypt." He turned around and kissed her cheek, not carrying if she was married or not. "Be careful." He squeezed her hand and jumped into his jeep. Turning it on and tearing away through the sand into the darkness.

"Dude Jack, I thought you were going to deck him!" Weiss's face looked amused as Irina turned and started going through the bags in the back of the jeeps, making sure they had what she asked for.

"It wasn't necessary to hit him, Agent Weiss," Jack watched Irina carefully, "I just wanted to clarify for him that it was unacceptable to hurt my wife."

_'Your words that night hurt me more then his physical abuse.'_ Irina thought to herself as she pummeled through the gear, listening to their conversation. Of course, she'd never tell him that now. _What was the point of ripping open a healed wound?_ She knew Jack loved her and the reasons why he had lost control that night.

"Are you ok?" Irina heard Sydney ask quietly coming up to stand beside her, and helping her with the equipment check. Sydney had seen the obvious awkwardness and discomfort racing across Irina's face during the confrontation between her father and Dubey.

"Yes," Irina turned to smile at her, "Thank you for asking." She brushed her hand over Sydney's hair smiling. Her daughter had such a big heart. "I haven't told you I loved you today." She smiled and Sydney's face lit up, "Sydney, I love you." Irina leaned over and kissed her.

"I love you too, Mom." Sydney flashed her a big dimple grin, her heart always melting hearing her mother say those words.

"We better get going." Irina said softly smiling, "You take that one and follow me."

"Ok." Sydney continued smiling radiantly, loving being in the field with her Mom.

"Load up troops!" Irina commanded and jumped behind the wheel of the tan jeep.

"Sweet! I'm riding with the Siberian Tiger." Weiss smiled, waggling his eyebrows at Vaughn and jumped in the backseat of Irina's jeep with Sark. Jack climbed in the passenger seat and Vaughn, Marshall and Dixon loaded up with Sydney.

They set off driving over the dunes trying to beat the daylight and had laughs and smiles as they Baja over the over the giant sand mountains. When they reached their destination deep within the largest dunes, the sun began to peak out.

Irina jumped out immediately and flew into action. Throwing duffle bags at everyone.

"Desert fatigues for the daylight." She smiled brightly and Sydney couldn't help but think, her mother's contacts had turned out to be very reliable. Maybe her father should have listened to her when they were in India.

"Um, where are we supposed to change?" Marshall looked around at all the sand as the sun came up.

"Right here." Irina smiled and started stripping off her Kevlar and outer shirt and all the men gulped.

"You, yo, you're going to change right here?" Marshall babbled watching as she started stripping her shirt off.

"Sure, why not?" Irina laughed at all their wide eyes and Sydney started stripping to. "You can turn around if you want, I'll turn my back, too. If you're shy." She tore her shirt off and stood before them in her sports bra and a smile.

When she reached for her belt, the death glare Jack shot the men, made them all turn instantly and Irina and Sydney giggled.

"Dad." Sydney called out and motioned for him to turn around as well. He may be fine seeing her mother in next to nothing but she wasn't about to let him watch her taking her clothes off.

Jack suddenly snapped to, realizing that Sydney was stripping as well and turned around while the women changed. Irina and Sydney sharing smiles and laughs as they stare at the backs of the men, taking their clothes off and putting new ones on.

"Ok, we're dressed." Irina called out and she and Sydney sat down in the sand, turning their backs and giggling.

The guys turned around and saw them huddled together, whispering and laughing, something that was never good with women. Slowly then quickly the guys started ripping off their clothes and putting on new ones.

"Are you ready yet?" Sydney called over her shoulder after five minutes giggling, finished with wiping the black paint from their faces. "You take longer then we did."

"Yes, we're ready!" Jack gave an exasperated sigh, feeling the desert heat already picking up.

"Ok, then." Irina jumped up smiling, turning to face them, "We need to get the sand tarps out and cover the jeeps and make some shade. Then we can get some breakfast."

With that task done, and breakfast eaten they now sat under their sun and sand shelter between the two jeeps and under the tarps covering them, playing cards.

"Marshall! That's not fair! You can count cards!" Sydney laughed when Marshall won again and everyone laughed throwing in their' hands for Sydney to scoop up and shuffle.

"Oh my God, it's hot!" Weiss exaggerated his speech as the dry air surrounded them.

"At least there is no humidity." Irina smiled thoughtfully, handing him a bottle of water. "The GPS says its 114 degrees."

"Crimany! It's only 10 am!" Weiss whined and everyone laughed.

"I love it. It's like we're camping!" Sydney smiled brightly.

"Everything is like camping for you!" Weiss shot back at her and everyone laughed, "Sleeping on the sub was like camping for you!"

"Hey, I can't help it! I love to go camping and I haven't gone in a really long time." Syd smiled and then her features fell thinking about the last time, "The last time I went…was with Danny, Francie and Will…just before Danny died…We went to Lake Piru."

Sark felt an unfamiliar twinge of guilt hearing the woman's name again.

Jack felt his daughters pain at losing the man she loved, remembering the savage way he was murdered in their home, left for her to find by Sloane.

"Isn't Piru up by Magic Mountain…in Valencia?" Weiss smiled, trying to bring a smile back to Sydney's face.

"Yeah." She finally looked up again with a small smile.

"We used to go there when you were little." Irina was happy to hear that her daughter continued to go there, still enjoyed camping, something she loved, being in nature. "That's where you broke your leg."

"Oh yeah." Sydney smiled, "I remember very vividly breaking my leg. You were crying." She smiled softly at her mother and Irina shook her head remembering, "And Dad carrying me to the car, but I never remembered where we were at."

"How did you break your leg camping?" Dixon laughed picking up the new cards she dealt.

"She was five years old and jumped out of the tree and onto our tent." Irina raised her eyebrows, "To this day I can still see you flying out of that tree in slow motion, with your little pigtails flying behind you and crashing to the ground." She shook her head as everyone else laughed and finally she broke into giggling with them. "Sydney said she thought she would bounce off the tent back up to the tree." She added and everyone burst into hysterics.

"Oh Syd, I can so see you doing that!" Vaughn laughed hard and then hugged her, still laughing when he saw her embarrassment, making her blush.

"Well why not? You did, Mom. You jumped off the balcony onto the tent in Spain, bounced and went flying onto the ground." Sydney finally laughed, and everyone laughed harder realizing how crazy both mother and daughter were.

"God, what a day that was…both days!" Jack smiled, laughing at and with Irina and Sydney. "You two are something else. Both of you give me chest pain!"

Everyone died laughing again.

"Ok more stories about Syd when she as little!" Weiss lit up with a smile

"Her ballet recital when she was two. Oh Jack, do you remember?" Irina grasped his knee, her heart melting and smile infectious remembering.

"Yeah, I remember." Jack broke into a wide grin staring at Sydney. "She was a snowflake."

"Awww!"Everyone chorused and Sydney blushed with a big smile, giggling, not remembering this at all.

"She was more like a one flake blizzard!" Irina smiled widely. "All they had to do was skip in a circle but not our Sydney. She went flying around the stage on her own path, twirling and kicking and spinning until she was dizzy and fell over."

Everyone burst out laughing with the image they conjured up of Sydney on a rampage.

"She stole the show!"

"More, more, more!" Vaughn chanted, smiling and laughing hearing about his fiancé as a Wild Child.

"Well, her espionage tactics were present from birth." Jack cocked his eyebrow with a smile, "When she was 10 months old, she figured out to get out of her crib!"

Everyone started laughing again.

"Yes!" Irina's eyes lit up, "She scared us to death. It was a Monday morning, I remember because I had spent all weekend correcting mid-terms and was exhausted."

The thought of Irina Derevko as a college professor at UCLA was still shocking to many of them.

"We used to bring her into bed with us in the morning and we always left the door open a crack so we could hear her when she woke up. I remember I was lying over your chest, with my face towards the door," She smiled at Jack and he returned it bashfully, "I heard a soft whooshing noise coming from the hallway. She was crawling though we didn't know what it was. Suddenly, the door just started opening wider, but we couldn't see anyone, it was like a ghost; and she was snorting! Do you remember? She always used to breath like that, through her nose when she was determined."

Jack nodded along smiling, recalling this morning well, as everyone continued to laugh at 'snorting Sydney the ghost.'

Sark sat stunned watching and listening to the details of Irina's life he never knew, her smile and how happy she was recalling them.

"Then suddenly, the sheet on the bed right in front of me started moving toward the floor as she pulled herself up, and then these two chubby little hands clutched the edge followed by her sweet little face and big toothy grin trying to peer up at us. She was so proud of herself for escaping and making it into our room."

Everyone continued to laugh and Sydney smiled brightly, proud of herself as a baby.

"And she stood there bouncing on the edge of our bed calling, '_Mama, Mama, Mama_' until Irina picked her up and brought her into the bed with us." Jack smiled laughing, still seeing that image very clearly in his head. "Irina picked her up and sat Sydney on her lap while we looked at our baby stunned and she lit into the biggest smile and started clapping for herself."

The laughter was loud and some were rolling on the sand with their sides hurting.

"So what did you guys do? To keep her in? Did you know how she was getting out?" Dixon asked the logical parenting questions with a big smile, still laughing.

"Well, we couldn't figure out how she kept getting out, it went on for about four or five days. I'd put her down and she'd escape and every morning she crawled into our bedroom." Irina bit her lip with an amused expression, "And then one day, I put her down for a nap and watched her from the hallway. Right away, our little problem solver was pushing all her stuffed animals into the corner of her crib and using them as a stepping block while she hung onto the railing and lifted herself over," Irina laughed softly shaking her head, "And she just hung there for a moment, dangling from the side by both strong little hands, then one as she grabbed one of the bars with the other…then shimmied down to the floor until her toes touched. She dropped to her knees and came crawling right towards the door. When her little hand pulled back the door and she saw me standing there her eyes went wide and then broke into a big smile and rapidly crawled towards me with her little giggle. Our sneaky baby. We had to take all the stuffed animals out of her crib. Boy, did that make her mad!"

Everyone died of laughter again.

"Good luck with your kids buddy!" Weiss slapped Vaughn on the back laughing hard, "Jumping out of trees, and climbing out of cribs!"

"And riding her tricycle off the sofa at two!" Irina added with dancing laughter.

"And sliding down the stairs in sleeping bag at four!" Jack added, recounting all the crazy things that Sydney had done as a child.

"Jumping into the deep end of the pool by herself at two and half!" Irina kept laughing, bantering back and forth with Jack and their memories.

"Stapling her lips together with a stapler at three!" Jack added and they all cringed and laughed at the same time.

"Oh, we could go on for a long time!" Irina laughed until her body shook and she pulled Sydney's temple to her lips.

"It's amazing you survived your childhood, Syd!" Weiss cracked up, "I think your code name should be 'Danger!" Everyone lost it again.

"Actually, Mountaineer is perfect for her…" Irina smiled, smoothing her hand over the back of Sydney's hair, "She was always climbing on everything!"

They laughed again and when it died down Sydney yawned and it set off a chain reaction. None of them had slept for more then 24 hours.

"I think we should all take turns sleeping now. We've had a long night, and tonight will be a very long night," Irina smiled her beautiful grin, patting Sydney's arm, "You guys go to sleep and I'll take the first watch-shift."

"I'll sit up with you." Jack smiled lovingly at her. "We can do it in pairs of two."

"Sounds good."

Everyone agreed and lay down on their mats, trying to get some sleep

When everyone as fast asleep, Jack and Irina began whispering softly to each other, conversing about their other favorite memories from their past and when two hours had past they woke Sydney and Vaughn to take the next.

Irina ended up falling asleep with her head on Jack's chest; her arm sprawled over his side and Jack's arm around her back holding her there having played with her hair until he fell asleep.

Vaughn looked over to Sydney and saw her watching her parents with an enormous smile.

"They are so cute, aren't they?" She whispered to him, turning her head with a big smile and glancing back at her parents.

Vaughn smiled softly, laughing to himself quietly. They did look pretty cute and that pose, was exactly the way he and Sydney often awoke in, in the morning. It was also pretty familiar to Jack and Irina it seemed, seeing them that way now and remembering Irina's recanting of 'Escapee Baby Sydney' and that she had been sleeping on Jack's chest that morning.

"That's how they used to sleep when I was little." She whispered back, as if just reading his mind, smiling madly at remembering and witnessing her parents sleeping together for the first time since her mother had come back, seeing them now with adult eyes.

"Apparently, it's a position that both you and your mother enjoy." Vaughn whispered back smiling and was greeted with her enormous dimply smile. "Something else you inherited from her."

When Weiss and Sark took over, they, too waited politely to begin speaking until they were sure that Vaughn and Sydney had fallen asleep.

Sark sat, staring intently at Irina sleeping so peacefully on Jack's chest, and right behind them, Sydney sleeping the exact same way on Vaughn's chest.

"Like mother like daughter, huh?" Weiss cracked a smiled seeing what Sark was looking at.

"It sounds and looks that way." Sark softly. "Hearing about Sydney as an infant and child, she definitely has a lot of Irina in her. Her ability to escape for one." He cracked a smiled turning back to Weiss.

"The fetish for jumping bikes another…Irina jumps over cars and off buildings and Sydney jumps her tricycle off the couch!" Weiss laughed softly.

"Sydney jumps out of trees and Irina jumps off skyscrapers. Yes, I definitely see a connection." Sark laughed softly with him, twisting the butt of his gun in the sand with his hands as he sat back against the jeeps tire, watching the sleeping bodies before him.

"I've never witnessed Irina sleep." He said quietly after a minute of silence and Weiss looked up at him and then followed his eyesight to Irina.

"Never?" Weiss asked softly, finding that extremely strange considering Irina raised him.

"No. For seventeen years, I only saw her meditating." Sark said softly, wondering if the reasons she hadn't slept had something to do with what happened to her in Kashmir, or because she wasn't able to sleep in Jack's arms, or both.


	47. Chapter 47

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): This is another chapter that absolutely you want to listen to the music as you read! Action packed craziness!**_

_**Thunderstruck by ACDC, Absurd (Whitewash edit)by Fluke, Bring Me To Life (Kevin Roen Mix) Evanesence and Paul Van Dyk, 'The End' and 'Born In Darkness' are by Hans Zimmer from The Dark Knight Rises Soundtrack**_

* * *

FORTY-SEVEN

o

"Thank you." Irina gave Jack a small smile, taking her sniper rifle back from him as she had finished putting her Kevlar on over their black BDUs now that night had fallen once more.

"Of course."He smiled in return, leaning over to place a soft kiss on her lips.

"Is everyone ready?" He looked around at their team and everyone nodded with a nervous adrenaline.

"Ok, let's go!" Irina gave a small smiled and jumped into the jeep and Sydney followed behind her.

They drove through the darkness, over the dunes for another 10 miles until they reached a sharp ridge, just before the oasis that had sharp and flat rocks pocking out beneath the sand. Irina shut down the jeep just behind the giant dune after looking at her GPS coordinates and Sydney followed suit.

"This is it." Irina touched her neck, speaking softly into her Com to the other jeep as she nodded at Jack, Sark and Weiss to exit. Irina went around back and handed ammo belts to all of them from a wooden box in the back, crossing one over her body as well. "Ok, here's how it's going to go." Irina sighed, loading more Uzi clips onto her belt. "There is going to be a roaming patrol coming around here in," She looked at her watch, "Five minutes…the first of four. We take them out…steal their jeep. I will take out the three snipers on this side and then split into 4 teams of two. Jack and Sark," She looked at them, pairing them up, "Weiss and Dixon, Sydney and Vaughn and Marshall…you're with me." She looked at the very nervous young man. "You and I will go in on foot from this side, towards the compound taking out the ground troops and getting you to that keypad before the sequence code changes again."

Marshall nodded nervously, looking as though he might throw up. Irina had duel intentions taking him as her partner, first, she needed to get him to that keypad and second, she wanted to keep him by her side, as he was certainly not experienced in combat.

"The rest of you will take their jeep, and proceed around the compound, when you encounter another roaming patrol, take them out and steal that and the snipers on that side of the compound. Remember there are three roaming patrols. So you'll have to take out two." She looked at all of them and they nodded. "With their jeeps it will be easier for you to approach the compound, meet Marshall and I at the door on the Southwest side in fifteen minutes and we all go in together, understood?"

"Yes." Sydney answered and they all nodded.

"Alright." She looked at her watch again. "They should be coming by here any minute. Let's go. "

They spread out in two groups of four and crept up the embankment of the back of the dune and when they reached the top, took in the massive structure before them.

"Holy shit!" Weiss gasped. "It's like a fortress!" The three-story building was a sight to behold on the valley floor of the desert and small green lights lit the corners way off in the distance. "It's like…more then a mile away and it still looks enormous."

"Goggles on, here they come." Irina spoke softly into the darkness, seeing the approaching jeep in the distance sinking behind one dune to rise again soon. "Mountaineer, you take the two in the back, I'll take the two in the front." She pressed her fingers into her neck, as Marshall lay right next to her, instructing Sydney who was further down the embankment.

"Roger Siberian Tiger." Sydney couldn't help but smile saying that name into her Com and she looked over to Weiss, Dixon and Vaughn…all smiles.

The jeep appeared over the next crest and Irina finished screwing on her silencer as she lay on her stomach, arms propped up. The men in the jeep could be heard speaking rapidly and laughing having no idea what was about to hit them when Irina aimed and fired at the driver. The bullet hitting him directly between the eyes, before she rapidly fired at the passenger who only had time to look in her direction before he slumped instantly. Sydney taking care of the other two in the jeep simultaneously with Irina. The jeep drove in an erratic pattern for a few meters before coming to a stand still before them.

"Ok go!" Irina pinched her neck Com softly motioning with her head to get up and cross over the dune. She lifted her goggles and plopped down onto her stomach once more, pulling the sniper rifle around from her back and setting it up on the hard surface beneath her. Her eye looking through the night scope acquiring her first target as Weiss, Dixon, Vaughn and Sydney pulled the bodies of the Libyan guards out of the jeep and rolled them over the dune.

"Tiger, we're almost a mile and a half away!" Jack whispered across Marshall, both looking through their binoculars at her target and watching her set her sight in stun as everyone else watched with rapt fascination as well, not believing she could possibly hit anyone from this distance and at night.

"Your point?" Irina squinted, finding her first target and lining his head up with her focal point. She squeezed the trigger and the man pacing on the rooftop's forehead exploded and he fell backwards, out of sight.

"Direct hit!" Marshall gasped in disbelief as Irina lined up her next target and squeezed, "Another direct hit!" Marshall turned white looking at the fierce some woman beside him and gulping, watching her slow and graceful moves as she executed the third unsuspecting sniper.

"That's impressive." Jack looked over at her with a stunned expression as Irina quickly moved to stand.

"They didn't just give me those medals," She looked at him with a deviant eyebrow, "I earned them."

"You were a sniper." Jack breathed out in realization and utter fascination. She was one continuous surprise after another.

"Among other things." Irina smiled mischievously at him, slinging her rifle over her back and removing her handguns with silencers. "Alright…move out…be safe." She looked him directly in the eyes as he and Sark climbed into the back of the jeep.

"You too." Jack returned the sentiment, with unsettling fears.

"Let's go." She flipped down her goggles again and she and Marshall trudged down the dune at a rapid pace.

"Seriously…that is one woman, I would not fuck with!" Weiss commented softly, watching as Irina and Marshall disappeared into the darkness.

"Ok, another target coming up on us at 10 o'clock." Vaughn whispered through their Coms. "I'll take the driver." He exhaled, spinning his silencer into place.

"I've got the passenger." Sydney whispered back, holding her gun, behind the door until they were closer.

"I'll take back left." Sark aligned himself with his target.

"Then I've got back right." Jack positioned himself behind Sydney's left shoulder as she drove. "On the count of three. One…two…three!"

Four silent shots rang out simultaneously and the four Libyan guards died instantly. Their jeep sliding down the dune a bit as Jack and Sark jumped out.

"We'll take care of this side…get the last patrol."

"On it!" Sydney, nodded watching as her father and Sark grabbed the bodies of the men out of the jeep and tossed them into the sand before climbing in and driving off towards the compound. She, Vaughn, Weiss and Dixon continued on to find the next patrol on the other side of the compound in a quick pace, knowing time was of the essence.

"Oh God!" Marshall stopped frozen as Irina, drew her arm across his chest signaling she spotted someone near the base of the compound, patrolling the entrance and they ducked behind a large rock jutting out of the sand.

The guard was talking into a Com of his own, on his shoulder as he paced and Irina looked down the wall about 200 feet to see another man speaking into his Com. They were chatting with one another.

She would have to take them out simultaneously so they could not warn anyone else. Slowly, she raised her guns and focused on both men and fired at both of their heads whipping them back at sick angles as their bodies spun to the ground. She waved her hand for them to continue and Marshall stuck like glue to her side, his goggled eyes scanning their horizon for other guards that wouldn't hesitate to kill them.

Sark took aim at the last of the two snipers on their side of the roof a few hundred meters away and fired, sending the victim face first off the structure into the sand.

"Nice shot." Jack praised him quietly at the young man's ability to shoot on the move.

"I learned from the best." Sark added dryly and then cracked a small smile with Jack thinking about Irina.

"Yes, she's quite the teacher." Jack shook his head with a small smile tearing over the last sand dune and parking it into the shadow. He and Sark quietly exited the jeep and looked around, waiting a moment before dashing into the shadow of the building and slamming themselves up against its side.

Irina scanned their surroundings, the complex less then 50 feet in front of them now and grabbed Marshall's vest by the shoulder, pulling him rapidly across the open distance into the shadow along the length of the compounds wall, shimming in the darkness to the opening cove of cover where the steal security door was waiting. She pushed him into the darkness of the building as she kept her eyes on their surroundings.

"Ok…send Base our GPS coordinates." Irina spoke back to Marshall and he pulled out his own GPS guidance system, punching in their location and waiting for Ops to task a satellite into their position.

Weiss and Dixon were creeping in the shadows of the far wall towards the Southwest side when they heard a noise behind them and drew their arms, ready to shoot.

"Shit!" Weiss breathed rapidly, lowering his side arm when they realized the night crawlers were Vaughn and Sydney. "We almost shot you!"

"Base Ops this is Siberian Tiger do you read me?" Irina held her fingers into her neck, speaking softly picking up their feed.

"Yes, Tiger we read you…satellite tasked and moving." Kendall shot back from Los Angeles watching the monitors as the young technician in front of him picked up Marshall's coordinates and mapped them to the satellite.

Irina glanced down at her own GPS, waiting for the compound, or more importantly, the bodies inside and outside to appear on the In-fared image.

"Got it." She confirmed when she saw the many red bodies and their blue bodies on the screen. According to her readings, four members of her team were coming up on them from one side and two from the other. She glanced at her watch, 'right on time.' "Go ahead with keypad." Irina nodded reassuringly at Marshall who swallowed hard and she kept surveying the desert darkness in front of her.

"Routing the transmission now." Marshall exhaled crossing wires and clipping onto various sources inside the keypad and watching as his palm computer ran the number sequences. "Shit!" He exclaimed hissing in a breath as the second to last number kept rolling without locking onto a number.

"What's wrong?" Irina narrowed her eyebrows.

"Their mainframe hasn't finished uploading the new code and the last two digits are spinning in cyber space…if it doesn't lock on in the next 20 seconds it will trip the alarm." He spat rapidly as his heart pounded inside his chest. The green numbers continuing to scroll, "Come on, come on!" He chanted as Weiss, Dixon, Sydney and Vaughn, edged into the black cove.

"What's wrong?" Sydney asked immediately seeing the looks on her mother's and Marshall's faces.

"Come on, come on, come on!" Marshall's voice commanded, "Yes!" He sighed as the number locked onto a '7' and the last digit searched for its new number. "Got it!"

Irina glanced down at her GPS and saw Jack and Sark rapidly coming up on the side.

Marshall was rapidly entering the long sequence of numbers into the keypad.

"Ready?" She asked quietly when Jack and Sark rounded the corner, they all nodded, changing weapons and adjusting their GPS thermal screens. Irina shoved her pistols into their holsters and grabbed the Uzi's strapped to her legs. "Stay behind me!" She flipped up her goggles and looked sternly at Marshall and he nodded terrified when the door slid open. "Let's go!"

_***Thunderstruck***_

Their jet-black clothing contrasted sharply with the white interior walls as they crept quickly forward.

"Get ready!" Irina whispered, knowing that hell was about to be upon them the moment she shot out the first security camera. She aimed and fired.

"What the?" The Libyan guard in the security control room watched as one of the screens suddenly went fuzzy. His partner leaned forward searching the screens as his friend pounded rapidly at the keyboard trying to bring the video feed back up.

A guard dressed in black with a red and white headdress rounded the corner, surprised to find the eight black invaders and started firing in their direction, trying to dive out of the way but was hit with a mass of bullets as Irina squeezed her triggers simultaneously and blood began to pour out of the mans head and chest.

"Sonofabitch!" The control room guard screamed seeing the dark figures creeping up the hall way and firing at the camera, causing another screen to go black. He sounded the alarm and instantly, the bright red lights on the walls began to flash throughout the compound as a low to high pitched siren sounded.

"Go go go!" Irina waved the teams on as they came to a three way split in the hallway with a fourth exit leading up a staircase.

From every direction a hailstorm of fire came upon them from the ends of the halls and they all dove back and retreated to covering of the hall split, seeking shelter behind the walls as the bullets whizzed by them.

Irina waited for a break in fire and launched herself around the corner, returning fire and gunning down the four men at the end of the hall before pulling back behind the corner.

"We've got to move!" She looked back to Jack, seeking shelter at the same time as Sydney leaned around the corner and blasted a group of guards approaching. Knowing they couldn't stay there any longer and needed to move or be pinned down they nodded in understanding the split up down the hallways, charging with guns a blaze at the enemy fire.

Sydney's gun ran out of bullets with two men left at the end of the hallway and rolled towards them to get out of the way and knocked the first shooters legs out from under him, clearing the way for Vaughn to take out the second shooter. The tall man Sydney grounded recovered quickly and Vaughn swept his gun to the side and shot the man in the neck, knocking him off balance before he could fire a shot into Sydney's head. Syd leaped up and kicked the man in his face, knocking his head back and breaking his neck as the blood gushed from the severed jugular vein.

"Vaughn!" She screamed seeing the shooter behind them and pushed him to the floor as a bullet ripped past them, exploding the wall behind them.

"How many are down there?" Jack asked and Sark bobbed his head around another corner, looking as they reloaded.

"Nine." Sark snapped back and waited for Jack before they both launched into the hall way, running and shooting,

"Ahh!" Sark shouted as a bullet ripped into his upper arm, and another hit him square in the chest and his gun went flying out of his hand.

Jack saw the shot and jumped in front of Sark as he flew to the wall taking out the shooter and firing rapidly, his face contorted as he became more pissed off. Jack grabbed Sark by the vest and pulled him up quickly scanning the damage. "Are you alright?" Concern flooded his eyes as his fingers quickly accessed the damage to his chest and upper arm.

"What's happening?" Kendall and the rest of the Ops floor listened to not stop gunfire and then Jack's question to someone if they were all right, obviously taking a hit.

"Yes. It hit the vest." Sark winced and took a staggering breath getting it back after the hit to the chest.

"Blue Eyes took a hit. He's all right."Jack leaned over quickly and grabbed his gun giving it back to Sark just as another hailstorm of fire came from around the corner.

Kendall inhaled and held his breath watching the dance of the few blue dots taking on the mass of red ones on the screen.

Irina landed a solid right kick to the man's jaw and sent him stumbling back wards and into the others as she flipped around in the air, firing as she turned and leveling the seven men in front of her with her Uzi's.

Marshall was beginning to hyperventilate around the corner where Irina stashed him and ducked nervously as the bullets came tearing through the wall corner just missing his head. He counted to ten like Irina had commanded him to do, waited for the break in fire and then rapidly ran in her direction jumping the bloody dead bodies into the next doorway of safety as she took on another group of guards moving up the hallway.

"Irina…" Sloane hissed as his eyes watched her spinning, kicking and shooting her way up the hallway on the monitor as everyone around him went into emergency mode.

"Now Mr. Sloane!" A guard grabbed him as the others corralled around him, ushering him out of his office as the siren blared on, trying to get him to safety.

"Cover me!" Weiss shouted behind him to Dixon, ducking into a doorway and dropping his magazines, reloading.

"Alright!" Dixon ducked back and Weiss ran forward, waiting for Dixon to reload.

"Jeezus they just keep coming!" Weiss looked down at his GPS seeing another round of guards coming their way. They pressed on up another hallway, stepping over the piling dead they were leaving in their wake.

"On the count of three!" Vaughn screamed into his Com, hiding in a doorway as the bullets ripped down the hallway and Sydney hid in a door just behind him on the other side, waiting for a break. "One…two…three!" He propelled himself into the path of the oncoming fire at the same time Sydney did, firing rapidly at the men before them. Their flesh ripping open and spraying fire everywhere as they went down, taking out some of their own.

The blood was running down Sark's arm, soaking his black fatigues and making his arm almost impossible to shoot accurately with and yet he kept firing despite the pain. His color was fading with blood loss and Jack knew he had to get them to an area where he could tie-it off.

"We have to get you inside that control room!" Irina spoke rapidly to Marshall, reloading her Uzi's behind the doorway as a stream of bullets ripped off the corner near her head and arm. "Follow me!"She turned the corner rapidly and fired relentlessly running up the hallway with Marshall behind her, taking three hits to the chest and one across her forearm, before slamming Marshall into the next doorway.

"You're hit! You're hit! Are you ok?" He asked rapidly seeing her wince inspecting her chest, where the bullets hit and the blood coming from her arm.

"Yes. Thank God for Kevlar." She breathed rapidly, getting ready to fire again. "We have to lock down the compound so that Sloane can't get out!" She looked him in the eye, seeing the terror there and suddenly they became determined, he had a purpose.

"Alright!"He nodded pursing his lips into a thin line, and gripping the unused guns in his hands tightly. He waited for Irina to jump out into the hallway again and followed, firing for the first time from behind her in the general direction she was shooting, having no idea if he was hitting the oncoming men or not but they were falling, either from her or from him. His adrenaline surged as they jumped the bloody mess of tangled bodies and limbs, heading up the industrial staircase.

Sydney and Vaughn reached the story about the same time that Irina and Marshall did, backs to each other and firing off rounds as a rush of guards came forth once more. Sydney felt a bullet whip through her hair and turned to see the man with the raised gun she fired furiously in his direction making the man's body jump backwards with the amount of ammo she pumped into his chest until he dropped back dead, chest exploded into a bloody mess.

_***Absurd***_

Out of the corner of his eye, Jack saw the shooters approaching from both sides of the hallway and rapidly spread his arms firing at both, turning his head rapidly from side to side as he mowed them down. Sark was in front of him and suddenly raised a gun, pointing it directly at Jack whose eyes went wide when he fired and the bullet whizzed past his ear and into the man behind him. Jack turned rapidly stunned that Sark had just saved his life and Sark nodded at him, with pale and clammy skin, his bloody hand clutching his gun tightly.

"We've got to stop the bleeding!" Jack pushed Sark into a room that looked to be a guard's bedroom and grabbed a pillow, ripping off the pillow case and tearing it rapidly into strips, wrapping them tightly around Sark's upper arm. He was more concerned then he'd let on for the young man, the amount of blood suggested the bullet had hit a major vein. "Can't have you die. She'll never forgive herself." Jack sighed shaking his head tying the last knot thinking of Irina and cracking a smile out of Sark.

"Thank you." Sark nodded, feeling a surge of 'family' pride and grabbed his gun again, charging out into the hallway. He was going to prove himself worth the effort and make her proud.

They ran down the hallway and made their way up the stairs were they could hear the firestorm above. Weiss and Dixon caught fire on the stairs on the way up and were trapped as the shooters came from above and below.

"Mountaineer, Boy Scout…we're trapped in the North stairwell and taking heavy fire! We need some help here!" Weiss shouted into his Com, firing down at the guards and then flattening against the wall as Dixon fired up.

Kendall held his breath listening to his agents plea for help hearing the heavy fire and narrowed his eyebrows watching their trapped position on the monitors in front of him.

The two of them were up against twelve guard members. Five from the bottom and seven from above, closing in quickly.

"On our way!" Sydney crashed her elbow into a guard's temple spinning into a flip kick off the wall and taking out another one in hand to hand combat with them now at the close proximity.

"They've got the North, South, East stairwells blocked off! Our only option is the West!" The guard pulled hard on Sloane's arm dragging him and the German doctor down the hallway.

"What about Jasmina?!" Sloane's heart was beating rapidly as they dodged carefully in and out of hallways avoiding the sounds of instant gunfire.

"They haven't breached into the other side of the compound. They're safe for now." Sloane's lead bodyguard pushed him along. "If we can get to the lower level we'll use the tunnels."

Irina hit a guard with the butt of her gun across the face, sweeping his knee to the side and blowing it with a sickening pop. His friend instantly spun and kicked her in the gut knocking her backwards and then landing another kick to the side of her face, spinning her to the ground as the explosion rocked the side of her face.

That only incensed her anger and she flipped back onto her feet without the use of her hands as they gripped her Uzi's and fired relentlessly into the man ripping open his gut at the close range exposing his entrails in a horrid fashion as his eyes bulged for a second before death came to him.

"Irina!" Marshall screamed from behind watching on his GPS as a three-pack of guards about to surprise her from behind the corner and one fired hitting Irina in the back and dropping her forward. He fired and hit one in the shoulder causing the man to spin in rage and return fire.

The bullets hit with lightening force knocking Marshall backwards and Irina saw him falling in her peripheral vision as she shot the legs out from under the shooter, decapitating him at the knees as the man screamed out in pain.

She spun up to her feet and landed a solid kick to the third man's side, pushing him back into the wall and fired at Marshall's shooter again, taking out his shooting arm before a punishing blow hit her from behind sending her flying into the wall face first.

"Sonofabitch!" Weiss screamed in pain as a bullet tore through his shoulder from above, violently throwing him into the corner of the stairwell.

Sydney and Vaughn attacked from above and the body the guard who'd shot him fell towards them from the sky and landed grotesquely on the railings in front of him. The man's eyes wide open, blood pouring out of his mouth and skewered on his own, bayoneted AK-47.

Temporarily disorientated Irina tasted the blood and felt the presences of the man walking up behind her to finish her off and she kicked back hard, landing her foot to his groin, she spun her body, kicking her legs in a cross pattern and flipping him onto the ground. She lunged at him having dropped her guns and threw her elbow into his face, breaking his nose she swiftly pulled her knife from her side and slit the man's throat in a fluid motion as Jack and Sark rounded the corner.  
Her arm and head whipping simultaneously to them, almost throwing the deadly piece of steel into Jack's heart when she stopped, seeing who it was.

Jack's heart and breath felt like they had stopped, seeing the blood pouring out of her nose, her split cheek and running down her arm.

_***Bring Me To Life***_

Irina took a few deep rapid breaths and leaped off the dead man whose blood was pooling at her feet and was relieved to see Jack fairly unscathed, though Julian had clearly been hit. There was no time for words to be exchanged when another round of guards came from the side and Irina rolled across the floor as Jack and Sark fired until she could get to her guns. Grabbing the hot metal in her hands she kept rolling until she was by Marshall's side.

"Marshall!" She called out seeing his hands were pressing his side just above his hip and blood was oozing out between his fingers.

"I'm hit! I'm hit!" His eyes stung with tears as Irina tried to pull his hands away under the firestorm of bullets surrounding her to access the damage.

Gently she rolled him to the side and realized the bullet had gone straight through, close to the edge. She pressed with her fingers making Marshall gasp in pain.

"I'm sorry but I have to find out if your bowels have been ruptured." She stuck her fingers into the wound and felt around knowing that it wasn't exactly sanitary but if they were indeed torn, he would die certainly with the toxins invading his system.

Kendall and the rest of Ops cringed hearing her words and Marshall's groans of pain coming through both of their Coms as they listened to her inspecting his wound.

"Nothing's ruptured, Marshall, it went clean through." Irina tried to give him a small smile, pressing hard on the wound with her hand, "Thank you." She realized he had taken a hit saving her life.

"Any…time." He gasped out in pain trying to smile at the beautiful woman with blood running out of her nose and lip.

"Marshall, we've got to get you in that control room. All right? Can you do it?" She helped him sit up, noting he took six hits to the chest with the flattened bullets in his Kevlar.

"Yeah." He groaned out and she wrapped his arm around her neck pulling them both up.

"Hold pressure tightly to your side!" She commanded, releasing his side and she guided them carefully and swiftly down the hall as Jack and Sark covered them. "Stay here!" She pushed him up against a wall and turned rapidly, firing through the glass windows of the control room killing the two guards inside before they knew she was there.

Marshall couldn't stand, on his own legs and began to slide down the wall, leaving his own bloody trail mark in his wake when Irina caught him.

"Come on, Marshall, stay with me! You're going to be ok!" She pulled him up again and thrust them through the doors. She pushed him into the chair in front of the controls and looked around for anything to keep pressure on his wound.

Looking down she saw the dead mens' bodies on the floor and whipped out her knife, cutting down the back of the jacket on one man and tearing the cloth from his body and his belt.

"Start typing, Marshall!" She commanded again, trying to keep him alert as she bunched up the material of the dead man's jacket and pressed it into his wound, wrapping the belt around the fabric and Marshall, pulling hard and latching it tightly. "That will slow the bleeding." She looked at him with serious eyes, trying to keep the man's fears at bay. Out or the corner of her eyes she saw Sloane's retreating form with his guards headed for the open stairwell. "Marshall, lock those doors!" She flashed her eyes to his before shooting out the glass in front of her, jumping over the slanted paneled desk and sliding to the other side, not having time to go through the doors again.

Jack saw the flash of black, whiz past him and realized it was Irina.

"Sloane's going for the open stairwell." She breathed rapidly into her Com and Jack and Sark realized she was going after him.

Jack felt torn, he was busy fighting off the guards in front of him but didn't want her after Sloane alone. His one moment of lack of concentration and he was hit across the face with the sole of a guards boot, breaking his nose and whipping his head back.

"Fuck!" He hissed out as the blood began to surge forth from his nose and he ducked another punishing blow, landing his own instead across the man's back, taking his gun from him and bouncing him of the wall.

The guard bounced back and into his own weapon in Jack's hand, lodging the steal blade up under his sternum leaving the guard gasping for breath as he slowly bled to death dropping to his knees clutching his chest and pulled the gun out of him and dropped it before his body joined it on the floor.

Sydney and Vaughn eliminated the guards above one by one and slowly made their way down to Dixon and Weiss.

"Are you ok?" Sydney's face was of panic seeing Weiss covered in blood as he pressed his hand against his wound.

"Yeah…yeah, yeah." He winced when they pulled him up,

"Just burns like a bitch!" He picked up his gun as Dixon reloaded while Vaughn held the other guards off in the bottom of the stairwell.

The last guard poked his head around believing they were reloading and his face exploded as Dixon's bullet met the last of the resistance.

"Syd, you're bleeding!" Vaughn's eyes darted to his fiancées thigh noticing the big gash going across the front.

"Bayonet." She pulled back the material over her ripped pants slowly to reveal a nasty wound. "It's ok." She looked up at him, knowing that it would need stitches but it wasn't pressing at this time.

Irina fired at the backs of Sloane's men, taking one down and his guards turned on her rapidly sending a hailstorm of fire in her direction. Seeing and open hallway to her right she continued to fire her Uzi's and rolled to the side into the protective alcove, knowing a moving firing target was certainly harder to hit.

"Who is that?" The doctor gasped from behind their temporary shelter having only seen the flying ball of firing black as they dove for cover.

"The mother. Irina." Sloane replied vehemently with a scorned tone and the doctor's eyes went wide, remembering removing her eggs in Morocco. "She's trying to stop the Prophecy!" He shouted as his guards continued to battle with her, playing hide and shoot, "We must get to Jasmina and get her out of here! Irina will kill our child!" The German man looked at him horrified. "Send a guard in to collect the other embryos and eggs just in case!"

"Jack, I'm almost out of ammo!" Irina thundered into her Com from behind her refuge, securing her last clips into her Uzi's.

"Shit!" Jack hissed out pulling his knife from another man's heart, "I'm coming, Tiger!"

"Mountaineer, check the control room," Irina spoke rapidly returning fire on Sloane's thugs temporarily cutting out, "Marshall's been hit and we need those exterior doors closed!"

"Roger, we're on it!" Sydney flew up the steps two at a time as the red crimson continued to flow from her leg, matting her pants to her leg.

"Go!" Sloane's bodyguard pushed him and the doctor down the stairwell when Irina had to take cover as the other guards returned her fire.

She flew around the corner just in time to see them darting for the stairwell.

"Damn it!" She seethed with anger and spat the blood running down her throat and into her mouth from her nose. She flew after them down the hall, knowing she had to make her shots count and saw the glass windows surrounding the laboratory. She was at a crossroad, _chase Sloane and take the chance of him escaping or take the chance of the guard escaping with her eggs and possible embryos._ "Jack, I'm going after Sloane…the lab is right in front of me…there's a guard in there now! You've got to stop him from leaving with anything!"

"Tiger, your ammo!" Jack's heart lurched as he shot an oncoming guard thundering down the hall as he saw Irina jump over the stair railing to the next level.

"Great! Just fucking great!" Kendall hissed quietly, "She's going after him without ammo!" He had a bad feeling about this.

"No time! Jack, get the guard! Stop him!" Irina was getting frustrated and firing down the stairwell and heard the scream of pain as she hit one of the guards in the back.

Jack saw the man she was talking about rapidly flying about the lab removing test tubes from cold storage units against the walls.

"Oh, no you're not, you sonofabitch!" Jack fired and hit the man in the back of the shoulder, spinning him around but the man persisted, firing at Jack in return and grazing his hip with a bullet and knocking him to the ground.

"Marshall!" Sydney flew to his side seeing him on the verge of passing out and the makeshift bandage her mother put in place soaked through with blood.

"I did it…" He said barely above a whisper, "Doors are locked." Marshall's body swayed in the chair and Vaughn and Dixon caught him.

"Go help, Irina!" Vaughn pulled Marshall from the chair commanding Dixon to go after Sloane.

"We've got him." Dixon saw that Marshall was in good hands and flew down the hallway, past the mounds of the dead bodies and rivers of blood in Irina's wake down the stairwell.

Jack crawled across the floor of the lab, unsure of where the shooter had gone to and rolled just as the guard lunged over the silver table and fired into the spot where his head had been. The large guard landed with a thud and quickly rolled over on top of Jack, pressing his rifle with both hands against his throat, pinning him down and choking him as Jack struggled to push the man off. His entire oxygen supply had been cut off and was starting to black out.

Sloane, the doctor and one body guard were all the that remained when they hit the landing, Irina had picked off 'eight' of them in the stairwell in only two floors.

"Quickly!" Sloane's bodyguard ushered them into the tunnel door at the bottom of the stairs. He pulled the door closed just behind him and locked it from inside as Irina hit the ground floor.

She yanked hard on the door and cursed loudly, pulling and realizing they'd locked it.

"Syd, go help your mom!" Vaughn waved her on as he and Weiss tended to Marshall. "Go get Sloane!"

Sydney jumped up immediately and flew down the hallway.

The large guard's body fell forward onto Jack and warm blood covered him as his vision slowly returned, coughing and gasping for air. Sark reached forward and pulled the dead man's weight from Jack and offered him his hand. Still coughing and somewhat dizzy, Jack accepted the hand and Sark pulled him to his feet.

"Thanks." Jack coughed.

"She'd never forgive herself if you died." Sark repeated Jack's earlier words with a small smile as Jack rubbed his throat.

Jack smiled shaking his head, he walked towards the test tubes the guard had been frantically trying to carry away with him. The name on the stickers clearing reading 'Derevko, Irina- Unfertilized Eggs,' 'Sloane, Arvin –Chrom. X Sperm.'

"Good God…" Jack gasped looking at least 22 tubes that read, 'Embryo #1-#24.'"Wait." Jack read the labels over again.

"What, what is it?" Sark asked searching the room.

"There are two missing." Jack gawked, "Numbers 4 and 7. Go figure."

"I think I may now why." Sark's eyes went wide as he pulled the black and white sonogram photo from the board in front of the doctors' desk.

"What is that?" Jack flew to his side, "Oh dear God." He gasped as his breath was stolen looking at the perfectly formed baby on the image. "He's already done it!"

Sydney had flown down the steps to find her mother and Dixon setting an explosive charge against the tunnel door. Irina had blood all over her face, neck, chest and arm from her various wounds and looked quite terrifying upon first sight.

"Back up, Sydney!" Irina held her arm back as she shot the putty and the door blew open with an explosive force. Irina took off running down the dark tunnel at a furious pace that Sydney nor Dixon could keep up with as she tore through the corridors.

"Tiger!" Jack took the photo from Sark, stuffing it into his vest and scooped all the test tubes off the shelves into the metal trash basket, the tiny glass breaking as it crashed to the surface, "Tiger!" He pressed on his Com trying to get Irina. "Damn it! I can't get her!" He saw the blue dots on his GPS and knew she hadn't been hit as he saw all three on the move."Base Ops, I can't get through to the Siberian Tiger, what wrong with Coms?" Jack asked furious that he was out of contact with Irina. He found a bottle of alcohol and matches in one of the doctor's cabinets and dumped it over the shattered glass and cells, backing up as he dropped the match into the can and it exploded into flames burning any future possibilities of the Prophecy child.

"We can't reach her either. She must be in a tunnel or something. What's wrong?" Kendall pulled his jacket back, resting his hands on his hips, he heard it in Jack's voice.

"He's already done it. Sloane's already created the child. Some woman is 12 weeks pregnant with the Prophecy Child." Jack hissed, grabbing his gun and flying out of the lab with Sark hot on his heels.

"Shit." Kendall's face went white, "How do you know?"

"Because I'm standing here holding the goddamn sonogram photo of the baby and two fertilized embryos are missing out of the series!" His heart pounded in his ears, the child in this photo may bring utter desolation to the world if born but it was also a part of Irina and now seeing it, not just some group of cells but a tiny living human, Jack didn't know what this was going to do to her when she found out.

Irina tore out of the tunnel a good distance ahead of Sydney and Dixon and felt the adrenaline pumping through her veins as she was suddenly surrounded by sand, tall grass, and palm trees. The oasis.

"Shit!" She hissed, having no idea where to go until she saw Sloane's head across the atrium and fired several shots.

"Ahh!" He screamed in pain as the bullet tore into his thigh and the bodyguard dropped dead beside him, blood draining from the sizable hole in the back of the man's head.

A young dark haired girl appeared a few feet before Sloane with terror and horror on her face at the scene before her.

"Get inside!" Sloane screamed at her and Irina's eyes flew wide in shock noticing the girl as she ran towards them, "Get inside, Jasmina!" Sloane was panicked and drug his leg with the help of the doctor towards her.

The girl seemed momentarily frozen and Irina fired at the doctor as she ran across the large atrium surrounding the entire oasis. The only light guiding her was the moon. The doctor gasped in pain as the bullet tore through his lungs and he clutched his chest in pain, grasping at Sloane to help him and fell to the ground wheezing as Sloane pushed him away.

"Inside Jasmina!" Sloane yelled again to the girl as he continued to drag himself towards her. She seemed to snap out of it and ran to his side, supporting him with one arm into the thick doors of the living area.

Irina fired another shot before he closed the door and hit him in the other leg, making him practically dead weight. The door closed and he was out of sight. Irina ran as fast as she could through the sand; her guns out of ammo, she tossed them aside and used her arms to pump faster, wielding her knives from her forearm straps into her hands instead.

Sydney and Dixon could see Irina just ahead of them as they tore through the oasis and watched her disappear behind the doors on the far side, worry over taking Sydney when they ran by her mother's empty guns lying in the sand.

_***The End***_

Irina stepped inside what was clearly Sloane's residence. Her eyes shifted down to the blood staining the white carpet as he drug his bleeding legs through his home and she crept like a cat through the house. The hair on the back of her neck stood up and she ducked and turned just before a guard shot her in the head. She lunged at him and knocked his weapon from his hands, stabbing one knife into his head at the base of his skull and the other into his heart as his mouth opened gasping and the blood poured out onto her hands and he dropped to the ground in front of her, silently.

Violently, she ripped her knives away and stepped over his body continuing to follow Sloane's blood trail. She watched it turn into a massive room with the lights off and slid inside against the wall, armed and ready for an attack.

Instead the lights flipped on and classical music faintly played as she was assaulted with what lay before was standing in a nursery, like Lena's…with a white crib and rocking chair, a toy chest and rocking horse, a little dresser and walls painted with beautiful murals. The framed image on the dresser directly in front of her had her frozen, two tiny feet of an unborn child…with her feet.

"I see you recognize your features in our child, Irina." Sloane smiled from across the room, sweating and leaning heavily against the doorframe, still standing with the aid of the young dark haired girl. "She is her mother's daughter. That was taken last week. Technology is wonderful these days isn't it?"

Irina couldn't breath, as she looked at the photo in front of her…her baby, her daughter. 'No.' She tried to shake her head of the thought but couldn't.

"You've already implanted an embryo?" Irina picked up the frame with one hand and looked back at him with fire in her eyes as Sydney and Dixon reached the doorway, halting as suddenly as Irina did when her eyes fell upon the room and then to the photo in Irina's hand.

"Yes, Irina. It's begun." He smiled smugly, reaching out to place his palm over the young girl's abdomen, showing the distended bump beneath her dress. "Our child is no longer an embryo, she is beautiful and perfect. Just the way I knew she would be."

Irina wanted to vomit hearing him say 'our child,' and had to swallow the taste of bile rising in her throat as she looked at him, holding his hand over the young girls belly.

"She's just a child, Arvin. You've impregnated a child!" Irina spat at him disgusted when she looked at the girl before her, a girl whose dark eyes were wide and terrified as she shook staring at the woman before her, covered in blood and holding knives.

"My God," Sydney gasped realizing that the young girl beside Sloane was pregnant with her mother's child, the Prophecy child.

"Jasmina is not a child, Irina. She is sixteen and in perfect health, young, and vibrant. The way God intended…perfect for carrying and birthing our child."

"Stop saying that!" Irina glared at him deadly, "We do not have a child! We will never have a child!"

"We already have one, Irina. You're holding the proof in your hands. Her perfect little feet. Her mother's perfect feet." He smiled and Irina's eyes flashed back to the photo and then to the room around her…so much like Lena's.

"You can't kill your own child, Irina. She is a part of you."

"Stop it!" Irina spat, shaking her head as Sydney's eyes filled with tears. "We're not having a child!"

"We are having a child, Irina; you are too late." His tone was soft and he smiled, his face growing pale.

"No, we aren't, Arvin. I cannot allow that to happen." She stood transfixed looking at the photo.

"I want to name her after her grandmother, I was thinking Anastasia or maybe Anya? Maybe even Irina after her mother." Sloane was pushing all the right buttons and enjoying the reaction he was getting out of Irina.

Jack and Sark arrived shortly after and joined Sydney at the back of the room, Irina in the middle and Sloane and the young girl on the far side, the girl, Jack and Sark realized was carrying the Prophecy child.

Irina remained deadly still in the middle of the let the photo drop and the frame crashed to the floor making the girl jump as tears began forming in her eyes, having no idea what was going on.

"I will never allow this child to be born." Irina turned her deadly glare to Sloane's.

"She is my daughter, Irina. Your daughter and as her parents we are bound to protect her." Sloane caressed the girl's abdomen with a smile.

"You're sick and twisted, you evil bastard." She seethed her hate with every word.

"No Irina, you're the sick and twisted one. You're the evil bitch." Sloane sneered, "You're the one who's killed your children. All those precious babies in Kashmir. That's right, I know about your dark little secrets." He taunted and Irina's eyes flew wide and began filling with unshed tears and Jack's anger skyrocketed to rage.

"What was it? Let's see your child with Jack. That was the first one of course, you selfishly couldn't bring your American bastard home to Russia so you disposed of him. Does Jack know about that? How you killed his baby?" Sloane's eyes went from hers' to Jack's and back again, "And then, how many were there? At least six other's according to Gerard. You whored yourself out to him and all of the other guards and officers and got pregnant several times. Then in your shame of not knowing who was the father, threw yourself down the stairs to kill your unborn children and now you want to do the same to your daughter? Add her to the list of your own children you murdered?"

Jack had enough and fired, hitting Sloane in the shoulder and spraying blood against the wall behind him. The girl screamed and began crying backing away from Sloane and out the other door watching the insanity before her. This crazy woman was apparently the egg donor and biological mother of the child she carried inside her and this same woman had killed at least 'seven' other of her own babies and now wanted to kill the one inside her.

"Dear God," Sark gasped quietly as did Dixon having never heard this before; this must have been the 'magnified by a thousand' part 'off screen' that Agent Weiss had told him about that day in the bathroom on what happened to Irina in Kashmir.

Kendall and the team at Ops were standing slack jawed listening in on the Coms horrified at what had happened to Irina off screen of the film in Kashmir and appalled the way Sloane had just thrown in back in her face.

Irina snapped and lunged at Sloane, burying her knives into his shoulders and pulling him to the ground with them. He screamed out in pain and she pinned his body beneath hers, sitting on his chest.

"I. Was. Raped." She said so low it was barely above a whisper in a deadly tone with cold eyes staring into his, she twisted the knives, pulling the flesh away from his bones, curling it around the blades before yanking and making him scream so blood curdling loud she couldn't hear anything as she blanked it all out.

The rushing sound of her lost baby's heartbeat, the sound of Cuvee's laughter as they beat her baby out of her and the prisoners cheering, her screams against the rape and Sloane's screams now. She heard nothing but silence as her rage took over and she drug the knives down and out of his skin pulling significant amounts of muscle tissue and skin with them. His blood spraying onto her arms as she plunged them back into his body, knowing just where to hit without causing too much organ damage, leaving him in a grotesque amount of pain but a very slow death.

"That was for stealing my eggs." She replied in a deadly calm voice, her face void of any emotion. She slammed her knee into his ribs, and a loud crunch of cracks rang out around the room, and he screamed again.

"You KGB whore! Get off of me!"

She scooted down his body and plunged the knife into his stomach and Sloane gasped, spurting blood as she twisted, "That's for hurting my Sydney." She plunged the other knife into his side and slowly pulled down, "That was for hurting Jack." She ripped the knife out of his side spraying blood onto the wall and plunged it into his chest making it gurgle, "This is for putting my baby's life in danger." She turned rapidly and plunged the knife from his chest into his groin in 3 swift strikes, on the last leaving the knife in and twisting before ripping it out, "For violating my body by stealing my eggs."

Sloane was gasping for breath and begging to die but the knife left in his stomach was causing him to die slowly, and painfully bleeding to death and she wasn't about to speed that up.

"So many innocents died because of you: Danny," She whispered into his face, watching his dying eyes as she slowly pulled the knife in his belly upwards gutting him and Sydney's tears flushed forward in a new wave watching her mother take justice for her loved ones lives, "Francie…Emily…Diane…and now…for this Prophecy Child, that you never should have created." She continued to whisper inches from his face as she leaned over him. His blood and bowels oozing from his body beneath her, gasping for his last breath as she stare into his eyes watching his pupils claim them in death.

"Mom?" Sydney called out softly walking slowly towards, with tears streaming down her cheeks, scared by the look on Irina's face the complete emotionless expression as her eyes turned black. "Mom." Sydney called again but Irina's silence remained as she studied the dead man's face beneath her. "Mom." Sydney called out softly, squatting down next to her mother, mindful of the disgusting mess before her, she touched Irina's shoulder and finally her mother blinked, looking slowly up at her daughter.

Her rage had gone and she felt nothing. Sydney stood slowly and Irina did the same, looking down over Sloane's disemboweled corpse; the white carpet blood red beneath her feet.

"Irina?" Jack called out softly to her as her eyes fixated on the photo of the baby's feet on the floor, her haunting eyes looked up at his and she turned away, stepping over Sloane's body and into the darkened room behind her.

She hit the light switch to Sloane's bedroom and sought out his bathroom, moving methodically without any thought she turned on the water and washed the man's blood from her hands, watching as the swirling red water disappeared down the drain. Her eyes looked up and caught sight of her own appearance, the drying blood on her face running from her nose she grabbed the hand towel and ran it under the water before wiping the blood off.

Jack and Sydney stood cautiously in the other room watching her behavior and deeply concerned for her.

Irina sighed, drying her hands with blood still under her fingernails and her own arm still bleeding she set the towel down on the sinks edge, staring at her own cold eyes in the mirror as she removed the two syringes from her pocket.

"Oh God." Sydney gasped, turning into her father.

_***Born In Darkness***_

"Irina, I'll do it." Jack looked at her, speaking with a soft tone knowing how difficult this was going to be, especially after what Sloane had accused her of.

She looked at her husband and daughter for a moment.

"Stay." She said barely above a whisper and then turned to search out the young woman. The closed door on the far side of the bedroom was the most logical choice.

Jack and Sydney, Sark and Dixon watched as Irina moved slowly away from them and into the far bedroom, hitting the lights and they heard the young girls chants of, '_No, no, no_,' as Irina approached her.

"I don't want to hurt you." Irina spoke softly in Arabic to the young frightened girl, backing into the corner of her room. "I cannot allow you to have this baby."

The girl cried out begging Irina to stop and it tore at Irina though she kept her emotions in check and locked away, knowing what she had to do.

"This baby will bring evil to the world." She searched the young girls eyes and reached out, grabbing her forearm and the girl struggled with Irina, to get free from her grasp as she started sobbing in terror. Irina twisted the girl around and into her embrace from behind, holding her arms tightly to the girl's chest and keeping them from striking out. "It will be okay." Irina spoke softly into her ear as she slid the first needle into the girls arm and the girl sobbed loudly, giving up and leaning her body weight into Irina as her legs began to give out and Irina slid with her down the wall and to the floor, holding her to her chest. She reached for the second syringe as the girl wailed and Irina slid it under her skin, pressing the plunger giving the heavy dose of the drug that would throw the girl into a hard fast labor, forcing a miscarriage.

Irina tossed the syringe aside and leaned her head against the girl's, wrapping her other arm around her and whispering over and over into her ear in her motherly tone,

"It will be ok." Trying to convince the girl and herself that it would.

The girl sobbed in Irina's arms as the cramping began, pulling her knees up to stop the pain as her body began to abort the fetus.

"It's okay." Irina tried to sooth her pain and felt the tears begin to sting her eyes as the first signs of the bleeding began.

Jack and Sydney approached the room, unable to stay away with the wails and sobbing, and their hearts broke with the image before them.

Irina cradling the girl in her arms, with tears in her own eyes, holding onto her tightly as the girl miscarried Irina's own child.

"Go." She spoke softly looking him in the eye, not wanting him or Sydney to witness this.

The pleading look in her eyes and voice crippling Jack and he grasped Sydney's arm, pulling her away from the doorway.

"So?" Dixon asked quietly, meeting them with Sark in the hallway.

"She doesn't want us in there." Jack sighed and pulled Sydney into his arms, holding her tightly and kissing her head as she cried.

"Jack, what's happening?" Kendall asked softly, hearing Sydney's crying in the background and Irina's chants in Arabic of soothing words on her Com. He thought he had some idea.

"She's aborting the fetus." He answered softly and Kendall closed his eyes with a big sigh, washing his hand over his face at the tragedy of this situation. "And Sloane's dead." Jack added a few moments later thinking about the man's body in the other room. A man he used to call his best friend, a man who had turned his life into hell and was now gone.

"We'll go help Vaughn." Dixon looked softly into Jack's eyes, nodding and motioning Sark to follow him, knowing that they needed some space right now.


	48. Chapter 48

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Sorrow by Hans Zimmer and Lisa Gerard from the Gladiator Soundtrack, Breathe Me from Sia.**_

* * *

****FORTY-EIGHT

o

**_*Sorrow*_**

"What's happening down there?" Vaughn asked seeing the look on Sark and Dixon's faces as they approached them.

"Sloane's dead. Irina gutted him." Dixon spoke softly, disbelieving that it was really over and not quite as happy as he thought he would be with getting revenge. "But Sloane implanted an embryo."

Weiss, Vaughn and Marshall's eyes went wide listening.

"In a sixteen year old girl," Dixon shook his head in disgust knowing the evil man probably purchased her from her family for his sick plan. "She is twelve weeks along, a baby girl." He sighed and swallowed hard thinking about the image of the little feet and thinking about his own daughter and what Irina must be going through, "Irina's aborting the baby now."

"My God." Vaughn said barely above a whisper, finding his mouth dry.

An hour later, it was over and the girl was sedated and sleeping, wrapped in a sheet when Jack carried her to the jeep where everyone was waiting in the dark.

Irina was following them and jumped into the back without making any eye contact as Jack set the beautiful dark haired girl carefully into the back with her. Irina nestled the sleeping girl against her chest again, holding her protectively in her arms.

Jack knew Irina felt responsible and guilty for what she had just put this young woman through and there was no way he was going to be able to change her mind that it wasn't her fault, she had to do it. He jumped in the front and drove away, followed by Vaughn in the other jeep and when they reached the crest of the dune a mile away, Irina pressed the red detonator button in the remote in her hand and the compound exploded into a thunderous ball of fire engulfing the one hundred and twenty-three corpses and evil left inside. She didn't bother looking back as she rested her face against the young girls head.

They switched back to their own jeeps and set off into the early morning hours to meet with Dubey.

Jack saw Dubey's light flashing in the dark three hours later and flicked back "Irina" in Morris Code with his headlights guessing that name wouldn't get them shot at. He pulled the jeep to a stop several feet away from Dubey and jumped out slowly, as did everyone. The pain and bruises starting to settle in from the stiff bumping ride through the desert.

Dubey stood wide-eyed in the dark looking at the battered bodies before him and surprised they had all made it out alive.

"So what's the damage?" He looked to Jack noticing the man's already blackening eyes from apparently getting hit in the face.

"Five gun shot wounds, and one stabbing, two broken fingers, four broken ribs and a plethora of bruises." Jack sighed, helping an injured Weiss from the jeep so they could all take a bathroom break in the sand before moving on.

"You are fortunate to all be alive." Dubey gathered stacks of clothing from the back of his jeep, taking note of everyone and only seeing the back of Irina's head, unmoving in the back of the jeep in the dark.

"Irina?" Dubey moved around the back to see his dark haired beauty and surprised to find the young woman sleeping against her chest.

Irina's cheek had been split, her eyes were also turning black and her lip was cut but she still looked beautiful. The mass of white gauze around her arm suggested she was either shot or stabbed.

"Vijay." She greeted him with a weak smile. "Thank you for meeting us."

"Are you ok?" He looked her over as Jack watched with rapt fascination at the man's concern for his wife.

"Yes. I'm fine but we have four people who need to see a doctor as fast as possible." She ran her hand over the sleeping girl's hair, knowing that this child, Julian, Eric and Marshall were in need of medical attention.

"We're about 75 kilometers from Oasis of Siwa. There is a doctor there who will be able to mend your wounds until you can seek further medical attention in Cairo still another 14 hours away." Dubey saw the look of concern flash across her face looking to the jeep behind her and Marshall who was sleeping and pale from blood loss. "If that's not fast enough, I can have a plane ready in Siwa to fly us directly into Cairo."

"I think we'd better fly. He's gone too long without medical attention as it is." She looked back to Marshall and Dubey's eyes followed. "The bullet went clean through but he's lost a great deal of blood."

"Okay, then that's what we'll do, Irina." He smiled softly at her, handing her a beautiful pink and gold sari. "I think this is your color." His smiled widened when hers' did slightly and Jack watched as she patted Dubey's hand and took the garments.

"Thank you." She smiled softly, not reaching her eyes and moved carefully, trying to ease away from the girl and Dubey jumped in the back to help her.

"Who is this girl?" He asked noting she was obviously Egyptian and not much more the sixteen.

"Another victim of Arvin Sloane." She answered tersely and Jack offered her his hand to help her over the side, which she accepted, meeting his eyes for the first time in hours, she smiled so softly he almost missed it.

Irina jumped down and Jack held onto her hand, refusing to release it until she looked at him again, sending her the message of 'it's going to be ok' with his eyes and touch. Her eyes began to fill with tears and she quickly shut them down, turning away and grabbing her sari, heading off into the darkness to change.

"So Sloane is dead?" Dubey asked leaning on the jeep from the opposite side of Jack, watching Irina disappear into the desert.

"Yes. He's dead." Jack sighed, the realization of it still sinking in after all these years. There was no relief, only sadness and a hollow feeling. The rage that had filled that spot was gone and only emptiness was left.

"Take your pick." Dubey handed him the stack of men's attire.

"Thanks." Jack nodded and went off in search of his wife.

Sydney was the next to grab a sari and head off into the darkness followed by Weiss, Vaughn and Dixon who helped Dubey change Marshall carefully.

Irina was just finishing wrapping her sari around her chest when she saw Jack approaching. Silently, he dropped his clothing into the sand and helped her secure hers', standing close and aching to help her seeing the deep hurt in her eyes. The pink and gold sari reminded him of their trip to India and he smiled as he helped her place the beautiful fabric over her wild hair.

"Reminds you of India, doesn't it?" Irina began unhooking Jack's vest and Kevlar, concentrating on the task and avoiding his eyes. She was afraid if she looked into his beautiful caring eyes, she would crack and lose it in the desert.

"Yes. It does actually." Jack smiled, encouraged to hear her speaking and helping him remove his own clothing. "You were gorgeous then…and gorgeous now."

"Thank you but I don't know how gorgeous one can be after five hours in a grain bin. I smelled like barley." She pulled the Kevlar up and over his head, their eyes catching and he locked his gaze with hers, holding them there."You looked so beautiful, and your wild hair and brewery scent only enticed me more." He smiled softly, cupping her face under her chin and brought his lips to hers softly, gently careful of her cut. His tongue grazing her top lip asking for permission and Irina opened wider, needing the contact and threaded her fingers into his hair, pulling him closer in an intense kiss until both of their noses hit and they both pulled back cursing in pain and holding their faces before Jack started laughing softly and Irina finally cracked a small smile.

Jack sighed, looking at her and took a step towards her again brushing her cheek.

"It's over, Irina. It's finally over. Sloane will never hurt our family again."

Irina nodded softly and looked down the sand, a flash of the dying man racing across her mind.

"I love you, Irina." Jack whispered into the darkness and her eyes met his again, their glittering black depths searching his for a moment.

"And I love you, Jack." She held his gaze a moment and bent over picking up her clothes and his, handing his new garments to him before walking away into the darkness.

"Irina," He called out softly, getting her attention and making her turn back towards him. "I love you." He emphasized his words, looking deep into her eyes, wanting her to know she wasn't alone in this anymore. He was there for her.

Irina felt the tears threatening again and swallowed hard knowing how much he wanted to help her and he couldn't.

"I know…as I love you." She turned sharply blinking her eyes rapidly and forcing the tears out of her eyes making her way back to the jeep.

They made their way through the Libyan desert for another hour, climbing the dunes and sliding down the sides as the sun came up in the East, the direction they were headed, turning the sky a magnificent array of colors.

Dixon was sitting in the back with Irina and Jasmina, his eyes drifting to Irina in the early morning light he noticed her pale color, glazed eyes and shaky hands.

"Irina, where is your blood testing kit?" He asked softly, realizing it had been many hours since he'd seen her take insulin or eaten anything and this look was one he'd never seen from her but remembered Jack talking about it from Christmas when she was getting too low.

Her eyes fluttered from the dunes to his and smiled softly at his concern, she hadn't even thought about it with everything on her mind.

"My reader is in the top left pocket of my vest." She said softly as Dixon dug over the back seat under the tarp trying to find which vest was hers. "My insulin exploded with gun fire." She sighed and shrugged when Dixon cracked another smile, seeing her bullet-laden vest at the bottom of the pile.

"Thank God for Kevlar." Jack voiced from the front seat hearing their discussion and sighing in relief she was wearing it this time or she'd be dead; all of them would be.

"Amen to that." Weiss added holding his arm so his shoulder didn't move.

"I'll use my 'just in case." Dixon smiled genuinely at her, watching her tenderly stroke the hair away from the young girl's face she was holding in her arms. He pulled the little black pouch that Jack had given them from his vest pocket and retrieved a syringe and the bottle of insulin.

She held out her finger and he hesitated pricking her for just a moment, not wanting to hurt her and unfamiliar with this procedure.

"It's ok." Irina nodded at him and he took hold of her finger and pricked it, squeezing and producing a small drop of blood that made him queasy, which he thought ridiculous with all the bloodshed and horrors he'd seen today.

He smeared it onto the paper strip and within 5 seconds read the numbers to Irina. She told him what to fill the syringe to and motioned for him to stick her in the upper arm, below her stitches from Spain.

"I have to tell you, I can't stand needles." Dixon cringed sliding the needle into the muscle of her arm and slowly pushing the plunger.

"Neither can I." Irina added softly, closing her eyes until he was done and then gave him a small smile. "Thank you." She was getting better giving herself shots but still cringed when anyone else did with the loss of control again.

"No problem. Anytime." He smiled, putting the bottle and syringe away thinking how far he'd come with this woman in just the last four months. Dixon rummaged around in their packs and gave her a bottle of water and another Power Bar, taking one for himself and handing one to Jack and Weiss.

They crossed into Egypt without any problems and an hour later arrived at the beautiful Oasis of Siwa.

They checked Jasmina into the small clinic Dubey had influence in as Marshall, Julian and Weiss underwent minor surgery to stitch up and remove the bullet in Weiss's case, from their bodies; and Irina and Sydney sat side by side on twin beds to get their wounds sewn shut.

"Are you ok?" Irina asked seeing the long gash on her daughter's thigh for the first time when the doctor removed the bandages to clean it, her eye's flashing with concern as the other doctor worked on her arm.

"It's ok." Sydney gave her a small smile, seeing her mother's wound in detail as well. "Marshall said you were like Bruce Lee, Rocky and Rambo all rolled into one." She giggled softly, and Irina smiled, looking down and shrugging her eyebrows.

"Marshall did an amazing job considering his experience." Irina inhaled deeply, her eyes lifting to her daughters, "He saved my life."

"And you saved his." Sydney gave her the famous dimples, "We all made a great team."

"Yes, we did." Irina sighed with a soft smile.

"What's going to happen with Jasmina?" Sydney asked quietly after a few moments, wondering the fate of Sloane's unknowing surrogate.

"I've asked Dubey to stay and look after her and when she's well enough to travel…take her back to her family with some money to start a better life and strict instructions…that she 'will never be sold again." Irina raised her eyebrows, knowing that if she gave the girl and her family money without those strict rules, her parents would keep the money and sell her again for additional funds.

"Mom," Sydney asked after a few moments in silence studying her mother. "Are 'you' ok?"

Irina looked into her grown baby's eyes, filled with love and concern and her heart melted.

"Yes, Sweetheart, I'll be ok…I love you, Sydney."

"I love you, too, Mom." She smiled brighter.

They boarded the tiny plane to Cairo six hours later and landed just before 8pm on Saturday. Irina had made a call in the air and a car was waiting for them when they arrived to take them to her home.

"Wow, look at the pyramids." Weiss gazed out the window as the setting sun illuminated the grand tombs of the kings. "I never get tired of looking at them."

They crossed the Nile and pulled into a massive security gate, driving up a curvy cobblestone driveway past a wide variety of tropical plants and palms to the enormous white house in front of them with hieroglyphic trim around the door etched in the stone.

"Another stellar home, Irina." Weiss gave her a small smile as they exited the car and she led them inside.

The entire interior was in line with the Egyptian history and was a spectacular sight to behold with its high vaulted ceilings and spectacular wood floors.

Carrie emerged around the corner with an enormous smile, holding Lena and a bit surprised at their appearance, noticing Irina's black eyes and Weiss's arm in a sling immediately. Marshall was escorted in with the help of Vaughn and Jack and his smile lit his face seeing his girlfriend.

"You made it. You all made it." She sighed and felt tears stinging her eyes, seeing they were beaten and bruised but all alive.

"My baby." Irina felt her own tears surfacing again as she took in the sight of her baby, sleeping in Carrie's arms. So perfect, so tiny and she felt a rush of tears thinking about what she had done earlier in the day. Slowly she walked towards them and lifted her child from Carrie's arms, "Thank you." Irina gave Carrie a tearful smile.

"She was perfect." Carrie smiled and gave Irina a hug, happy to see her alive. "Marshall!" She ran to his side when Jack and Vaughn deposited him on Irina's leather sofa, noticing him wince with the movement. "What happened?"

"I was shot." Marshall smiled feeling as though he'd earned his badge of honor.

"Oh my God…" Carrie gasped as her hand went over her mouth, not realizing how deeply she cared for this man until this very moment when she discovered she'd almost lost him. "What happened?" She sat beside him as the others, stretched out on the various couches and chairs around the room, relaxing after such a stressful last few days.

"He saved my life." Irina smiled softly, holding her baby in her arms and looking at Marshall with pride. His smile lit from ear to ear hearing Irina.

"You did?" Carrie's eyebrows rose up in surprise.

"I only did what anyone would do…the man was going to shoot her!" His eyes looked sad and his eyebrows scrunched, "She didn't see him, so I shot…and was shot in return."

"He was very brave." Irina smiled softly at the young man and looked back to her baby, noticing the blood still under her fingernails her eyes went wide in horror. "If you'll excuse me, I feel disgusting and am going to take a shower. There are six bedrooms in this house with bathrooms. Help yourself to any of them and anything in the kitchen." She relayed quickly before darting into her room with the baby.

Jack stood still by the edge of the couch, his heart beating loudly in his chest witnessing her pull away. He was afraid and didn't know what to do or how to help.

Irina closed the door and backed against it, taking a deep breath trying to stop herself from crying and she managed to. She laid the sleeping baby in the middle of her bed and started stripping her clothes off as she made her way into the shower.

The scalding water hit her back in a relief as she let the water pound over her, filling the room with steam as she scrubbed her skin pink, trying to rid her body of every ounce of blood that stained her skin and her fingernails.

"Cleaning up sounds like a fabulous idea!" Sydney slapped Vaughn on the thigh and departed his lap where they sat on the sofa. "I have sand in places I never imagined!" She smiled and elicited a group of small laughter.

"Me too." Dixon laughed, and followed her up the stairs veering off into an empty bedroom with his bag that had been sent ahead of them with Carrie and Lena.

Irina emerged twenty minutes later having scrubbed every inch of her skin at least four times. She had blown dry and combed out her hair and threw on a lightweight turquoise blue dress with thin spaghetti straps that clung to her every curve, the length stopping two inches above her knees and a slit up the back.

Lena started to wake up and Irina crawled onto the bed beside her with a smile as the baby found her eyes immediately.

"Hello, my baby girl." Irina kissed her softly and Lena lit into a big smile seeing her Mama, her eyes then darting to what she'd been missing the last couple of days and she began to whimper and then cry. "Shhh, you're ok." She cooed into Lena's ear and sat up, dropping her dress top and pulling the baby into her arms. Lena had turned into the ravenous shark she was and greedily sucked at Irina's breast, clutching her mother tightly.

Irina felt a sense of peace come over her as she looked down to the baby in her arms as her body ached for her baby and then the tears came again, thinking about the baby whose life she had ended today. She knew that she had no other choice, but the pain was there none-the-less. Sloane had called her a murderer of her own children…and the word echoed through her soul. Every single child she had lost, had taken apart of it with them and today was no exception. She had told herself that any child created that way and with that man could be nothing but evil but when she saw the baby's room…saw the photograph of their tiny little feet, a part of her that 'her daughter' had inherited…it suddenly gave feelings to her with the association, that familiar tug on your heart and bond that you feel when you hear your child's heartbeat for the first time, see them on a sonogram or feel them kick and move.

She had seen her daughter, this Prophecy Child, and had delivered her teeny-tiny form, leaving her little body in a towel on the bed in the blazing inferno in the desert. Now she couldn't get the image out of her mind or the others, especially the child she'd lost with Jack and wanted so badly.

While Lena nursed, Irina inspected her tiny body and ran her thumb over the bottom and toes of her little foot, her mind continuously flashing to the image in that frame. She had to get out; had to get away from everyone for a few hours and clear her head. When Lena was finished she changed her into her sleeper and made way for the living room.

Sydney and Marshall were sitting quietly on the couch talking when she entered and looked around for everyone else.

"Where is everybody?" Irina asked softly handing the baby to Sydney as she motioned she wanted to hold her sister.

"Vaughn, and Eric are taking showers and Dad, Carrie and Dixon are on your patio looking over your fantastic view of the Nile and pyramids." She smiled warmly, having just come in from gawking in awe as well. "Are you going somewhere?" Her eyebrows suddenly furrowed seeing her mother slipping her shoes on.

"Yes. I just need to get out for a bit. I'll be back in a while." Irina refused to meet Sydney's eyes; she didn't want to answer a lot of questions.

"Is that safe now?" Sydney didn't like the idea of her mother, who was now notoriously famous royalty out and about in Cairo by herself.

"I'll take two SVR agents with me. I won't be long, don't worry, Sweetheart." Irina dropped a quick kiss to her head and then Lena's. "Bye Marshall." She was out the door before Sydney could ask anything else.

Jack heard the front door open and close and stepped in from outside.

"Was that your mother?" He arched his eyebrow at Sydney, seeing Irina nowhere in sight now.

"Yeah, she said she needed to get out for awhile." Sydney swallowed hard, feeling the same foreboding feeling her father was feeling. Her mother was pulling away.

"She went by herself?" Jack's panic level began to rise.

"No, she took two of the Russian agents with her. She said she wouldn't be gone long." Sydney stroked the back of Lena's little head with her fingers. "Dad, I'm really worried about her. You saw her eyes after what Sloane said, like she went somewhere else and she hasn't come back from there yet." Sydney's eyes began to tear, Jack nodded softly agreeing with her and they both felt helpless.

***Breathe Me*(on repeat until the end)**

Irina had her driver take her to a little bar in a seedy part of Cairo where she had done many a business dealings in the last twenty years. It was dark and there weren't a lot of people around, only locals and certainly no tourists to recognize her famous face and bother her at this moment. She wanted to stop the onslaught of memories and images attacking her mind and heart, as her emotions were about to be unleashed. Her guards stayed at the other end of the bar, keeping an eye on her while they kept an eye out for trouble. She took up residence on the stool at the corner of the far edge of the bar and smiled at the bartender she knew well.

"Bad day, Irina?" He asked softly with a smile noticing her bruised face and bandaged arm, getting out a shot glass and pulling down the bottle of vodka, knowing this woman's tastes. She owned one of the most beautiful bars and clubs in all of Egypt and yet she preferred to drink at his little dingy bar; the man was intrigued by her.

"Something like that, Sayeed." She shrugged her eyebrow and slammed the shot, wincing as it burned her dry desert throat. He retrieved another shot glass and filled it up, watching as she slammed it as well. "Keep them coming." She instructed and he kept pouring.

Jack waited for her outside on the balcony, watching the city before him and couldn't take it anymore. He found the remaining SVR agent and asked him to find out where Irina had gone. The man called the agents Irina had taken with her and Jack had the location. He saw the worry on Jack's face and agreed to take him there.

When he walked into the door of the little bar, Jack nodded at her guards as his own joined them.

Irina was at the far end of the bar in the darkly lit watering hole and had assembled quite the mass of tiny glass shot glasses lined up in front of her. She was so busy staring into her glass of Egyptian rum she didn't notice him when he slid onto the stool next to her on the corner.

"What I get you?" The bartender asked in broken English, seeing this man was obviously a Westerner and way out of the limits of the tourist district. His face looking as badly bruised as Irina's.

"I'll have what she's having." Jack nodded towards Irina and her eyes slowly went to his with her delayed reaction. He knew she was already well on her way to being drunk if she wasn't already.

"Jack." She smiled, closing her eyes and shaking her head 'of course he'd come.'

The bartender eyed the man carefully, seeing that Irina obviously knew him and then it hit him, he'd seen this man's photo and on the television with her lately.

"You her American husband, yes?" The bartender looked at him cautiously wondering if they hadn't inflicted their bruises upon each other and perhaps that was why Irina was having such a bad day. He slid a glass of rum towards Jack and set the bottle of vodka in front of Irina.

"Yes, I'm her husband." Jack nodded keeping his eyes on Irina as she poured herself another shot.

"I leave you two alone." The bartender saw his presence wasn't required and slipped to the other end of the desolate bar.

"Talk to me, Irina." Jack pleaded with her, watching her spin the full shot glass on the slick counter top as tears welled in her eyes.

"What's there to talk about, Jack? I'm a murderer. I killed my own child today." She lost the battle with her tears and downed the shot, slamming the glass onto the wooden bar top.

Jack's heart was breaking for her.

"You're not a murderer." He said softly, pouring himself a shot. "You did what you had to do, Irina. Sloane is the one to blame for this; he's the one, not you."

She took a sip of her rum, trying to erase the images that came flooding forward.

"No Jack, I'm to blame for this. He may have started it," She began with her speech slurring slightly, "But I finished it and he's right. I am a murderer. I've helped murder eight innocent babies, Jack. My own babies."

"Irina," Jack felt her slipping further away and grabbed her hand in his, "You didn't murder them, Irina! Cuvee did that to you! To them!"

"I didn't stop him, Jack. I let him push me down those stairs. I didn't want those babies." She started to sob softly as her breath caught, "I wanted our baby. I wanted our son."

Jack sucked in a sharp breath with her admission his eyes glistening with unshed tears.

"I don't know when they took me off that cross." She inhaled sharply in between her controlled sobs as her body began to shake, "I woke up in my cell…hours later. I was bleeding everywhere and cramping. He was so small, Jack. So small but perfect." She sobbed pulling her hand from his, covering her eyes with that hand as the tears rolled off her cheeks having never spoken of him before now. She took a large swig of her rum and forged on, "He was so small, but so perfect."

Jack's tears rolled down his cheeks, his heartbreaking for their son, and for Irina.

"He already had dark curly hair." She looked up at him with pained smile, "Just like his Daddy. I named him 'Jack' after you."

Jack grabbed her hand again gripping it tightly and not letting her go.

"He had these tiny little hands…and feet," She sobbed and released her hand from her drink and covered her eyes again, too ashamed to look at him, looking down at the bar, "He was so perfect, Jack. So beautiful." She kept repeating it over and over as she cried. Still seeing his small but beautiful image in her mind.

"I'm sure he was, Irina." Jack cried in barely above a whisper thinking about the son he'd never know.

"The first time, that I ever felt him kick me…was my first day in prison. When they electrocuted me." She sobbed and Jack bit his own back, "He must have been in so much pain." She kept sobbing and Jack cupped her face and pulled her head into his hands, resting his forehead against the top of her Chestnut hair, as she cried and he tried desperately to keep it together. "I was supposed to protect him, Jack. I was his mother, and I couldn't protect him. I couldn't keep him safe. Sloane was right."

"No, My Love. Sloane wasn't right. You did everything you could to protect our son. You were being his mother. You tried, Irina. It's not your fault, My Love. It's not your fault." Jack felt her warm tears flowing onto his hands.

"I can't let him go, Jack. I keep hearing his heartbeat and seeing his little face, holding him in my arms, screaming when they took him away...and their laughter." She started sobbing harder as the memory of her little boy's body being ripped away from her flashed through her mind, "Jack, they made watch when they threw our baby into the prison incinerator."

"What? Why?" Jack gasped feeling a rush of tears at the monstrosity of horror he could not fathom.

"Telling me they were '_sending the spawn of Satan back to hell! _He was still alive, Jack_._" She sobbed harder but quietly. "I wanted to die, Jack. I just wanted die..."

Jack started peppering her head with kisses.

"Irina, I'm sorry, My Love. I'm so sorry."

"And when I died during the Execution, Jack, a little boy with big brown eyes and dark wavy hair came to get me." She sobbed holding his hands against her face as she shook with her head down to the bar and her hair hiding her face, "It was our son, Jack. My own little angel, with this big smile. He said, '_Come with me, Mama_."

Jack leapt off the stool and turned her, engulfing her into his arms, cradling her against his chest as she sobbed.

"I took his little hand, Jack and he led me home…and then suddenly, he pulled my arm so knelt down and hugged me. He kissed my cheek with a sad smile and said, '_You've got to go now, Mama. They're waiting for you._' That was it, Jack. He was gone. He was gone…" She started sobbing into his chest uncontrollably and Jack swooped her up into his arms with tears streaming down his cheeks and strode for the door with speed and the guards jumped to their feet having no idea what was wrong but followed quickly.

Jack held her in his arms as she sobbed all the way to the house and he carried her inside when the guards opened the door. Everyone was still awake and in the living room when he strode through the door with a tear-streaked face and Irina still sobbing softly in his arms, her face buried in his neck and her high heels hanging from his fingers by their straps.

Sydney's eyes instantly flooded with tears seeing her father was still crying and her mother sobbing in his arms. She tried to go to them and Jack looked her in the eyes, shaking his head softly 'no' as he pushed past everyone down the hall into Irina's bedroom. Vaughn wrapped his arms around her from behind, as she stood there stunned watching them disappear behind the door.

"It's ok, Sydney."He kissed her temple feeling tears stinging his own eyes. "She'll be ok." Thinking it had to be about what she had to do earlier in the day and the Prophecy Child.

Sark felt like he couldn't breathe, tears springing to his eyes and… scared. He'd never seen Irina like this. So small looking, so delicate and fragile in her husband's arms as she sobbed softly.

Jack laid Irina softly on the bed and curled up beside her, holding her in his arms as she continued to cry in his chest. "It's ok, My Love. It's ok. Let it out." His own tears streaming down his cheeks as he held her and they grieved for their baby boy together.

"He was so beautiful, Jack." She sobbed picturing the little boy with the brilliant smile looking up at her and tugging on her hand, his little arms wrapped around her neck and his wet lips on her cheek when he said, '_goodbye._'

Irina eventually cried herself to sleep, dreaming of her little boy in heaven, having passed out from exhaustion and liquor. Jack lay there for awhile holding her in his arms, before moving away softly and covering her with a blanket. He kissed her bruised, tear-stained face with tears in his own eyes and left the bedroom quietly.

Just as he suspected, Sydney and everyone else were waiting quietly in the living room instead of going to bed.

"Dad!" Sydney launched into his arms, holding him tightly. "What's wrong?" She sobbed and Jack held her tightly fighting his tears. "Please tell me? We're all worried about Mom. About you…" She pulled back seeing her father's tear-stained face. "Please?" She pleaded and Jack knew he had to tell her; tell them all now, as they all loved Irina…all cared about her…were all family, and they knew something was horribly wrong and would find out another way if he didn't tell them.

"You had a brother, Sydney." He cupped her face as more tears poured down his cheeks and hers, "The baby your mother was carrying when she went to prison was a boy. A perfect little boy with dark curly hair. And she named him 'Jack." He sobbed quietly and bit it back when Sydney covered her mouth to keep from sobbing herself hearing the news. "What we saw on the video footage, after they beat her. She had him in her cell." He took a staggering breath, "Then they made her watch when they…" He swallowed hard not knowing if he should tell her this horrific part.

"Then they made her watch when they did what, Dad?" Sydney gasped in between her tears seeing her father divert his eyes, "Made her watch when they did what, Dad?" She asked again more forcefully, knowing he was withholding.

"They made her watch," He finally looked at her with a horrible sadness in his eyes that Sydney had never seen, "When they threw him into the incinerator. He was still alive."

Sydney sobbed loudly and started crying uncontrollably falling into Jack's arms where he held her tightly, seeing everyone crying behind her in horror and grief.

Another piece of the puzzle, that was Irina, clicked into place for Sark. She had, had a son…and Cuvee had killed him. His own mind flashing with the horrible images from the film of the man punching Irina continuously in the stomach, before she dropped and his guards finished kicking the little life out of her.

"She never told you about him?" Sydney gasped reining in her sobs as she clung to Jack.

"No, not until just now," Jack fought back his tears but it was useless. "I knew about the baby of course but she never told me the details. Sloane got to her today, telling her she murdered her children and failed to protect them."

"That bastard!" She clutched her hand into a fist at the man who was dead and still wrecking havoc on her family.

"She'd buried it inside her and today, having to abort the Prophecy Child, a baby that was part of her. Seeing the photo of her, made everything come flooding out." Jack batted at his fallen tears and furrowed his brow, speaking softly, "She saw him, Sydney. She saw your brother when she died."

"What?" Sydney lifted her head from his chest with her eyes wide, searching her father's face.

"She said that a little boy with big brown eyes and dark wavy hair…" Jack had to take several mini-calming breaths in between his words, "Came to her when she died and smiled at her, holding out his little hand and said, '_Come with me, Mama.'_ He was our little boy, _our Jack."_ Jack swallowed hard and a fresh wave of tears and sobs went through everyone in utter shock and sadness.

"He was the angel that came for her..." Sydney realized now what her mother had been talking about in speaking of her death to Zamir. Talking about waiting for either the angels or demons to come for you.

"Yes." Jack pawed at the stinging tears on his freshly shaven face.

"But she came back to us. What happened to..." Sydney sobbed wondering what happened with her brother then.

"She said that they were walking and he suddenly stopped, pulled on her hand until she was kneeling in front of him and he hugged her with his little arms around her neck." Jack's tears flushed full again and he bit his lip to keep back his sob thinking about their 'heavenly' goodbye, "He kissed her cheek with a sad smile and told her, '_You've got to go now, Mama. They're waiting for you._' And then he was gone and she came back to us."

They were all openly crying and sniffling. Their hearts were shattered at the pain and torment that Irina was living with everyday buried beneath her surface and none of them ever knew about. The secrets of her heart that were so painful.

"I think, he's your guardian angel, Syd." Weiss surmised thinking about the little boy in heaven and all of the lucky miracles that had saved Sydney's life on more then one occasion, "And Lena's, too. He's being a good brother." He offered her a small smile as another wave of tears coursed down his cheeks and Sydney's as she turned and strode the few feet separating them, hugging him tightly and mindful of his shoulder.

Vaughn stepped forward with tears dripping off his chin and handed Jack a sleeping baby Lena, nestled into her soft blankets and sleeping like the angel she was.

Jack smiled softly with more unshed tears looking down at his sweet baby in his arms and thinking about her 'guardian angel,' her big brother. Weiss had made sense for once. Perhaps, their little boy had a hand in sending this tiny angel in his arms their way; giving them their second chance to be a family. A gift to his mother who'd loved him so and tried so desperately to save him; sending them a miracle. Lena had survived so much, just to be born and Sydney, too, in working as a spy. He must be their guardian angel. He was being a '_good brother,_' a good son, when he sent Irina back to them. Giving her a second chance to be a mother again.

"Dad, I want to see her." Sydney sobbed turning back to her father and wiping at her tears and puffy eyes.

"She's sleeping, Sydney. She finally passed out from exhaustion and the bottle of vodka she downed before I got there." Jack used his free hand to wipe his own tear tracks as well.

"Please? I just want to take Lena in there and lay with her. I don't want her to be alone right now." Sydney stroked her hand softly over her sister's little arm with new tears in her eyes. "I want to be there when she wakes up in the morning. I want her to see that we're still here; that we love her and we're not going anywhere." She inhaled a shaking breath trying to control her sobs.

"Ok Sweetheart." Jack cupped the side of her head and kissed her forehead, thinking that might be exactly what Irina needed.

"Vaughn, is it ok if I-" She turned to him and he cut her off, wrapping his arms around her, kissing her temple.

"Of course it is, Sydney…of course it is."

"Thank you." She kissed his lips and hugged him tightly. "Goodnight." She tried to smile through her tears at everyone before heading down the hallway towards her mother's room followed by her father and sister. Sydney cracked the door open and a little and slipped inside.

Her mother was in the middle of the enormous bed, looking so small and fragile curled up in a little ball under the blanket. Sydney took Lena from her father and laid the baby next to Irina before sliding in bed behind her, facing Irina with Lena nestled against her. Jack walked quietly around the bed and slid onto the other side, spooning up behind Irina and wrapping his arms around her. He saw Sydney's fresh tears staring into her mother's face and reached for her hand, clasping it, holding the four of them together.


	49. Chapter 49

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Where I Come From by Passion Pit, A Thousand Years- Pt.2 (ft. Steve Kazee) by Christina Perry.**_

* * *

FORTY-NINE

o

_***Where I Come From***_

Irina felt the weight of Jack's arm around her before her eyes fluttered open and a smile came to her face staring into Lena's wide open eyes and busy fists, her smile only grew when she saw Sydney asleep just behind Lena. Her babies and Jack all sleeping together. She couldn't have awoken to a more beautiful sight. She moved her hand gently to grasp her baby's little hand and Lena instantly wrapped her tiny fingers around Irina's finger, smiling madly at her mother and cooing making Irina giggle softly.

Jack felt the vibrations against his body and slowly his eyes opened and realized Irina was awake, watching her finger clutched in Lena's hand wave back and forth, Irina's thumb caressing the back of her little hand. Jack wrapped his arm tighter around Irina and kissed her shoulder, snuggling in closer behind her and Irina smiled, using her free hand to reach up and grasp Jack's protective arm around.

Lena's little fist waved and hit Sydney in the nose, bringing her awake and after a few blinks, smiled madly seeing her mother smiling back at her, her father's arm wrapped around her mother and his head propped up on hers.

"Good morning." Irina smiled and took a deep breath, feeling much better this morning after talking with Jack about their little boy and waking surrounded by her family.

"Good morning." Sydney smiled groggily, snuggling her face into her pillow and running her fingers over Lena's little head. "Are you ok?" She asked Irina softly, happy to see her mother smiling again.

"Mmmhmm." Irina smiled and nodded against her pillow, reaching her hand over and catching Sydney's fingers, holding them tightly. "Today is a new day." Irina said softly, realizing today was the first day they would no longer have to worry about Sloane and could start living their lives.

Sydney's eyes darted up to Jack's with a smile and Irina could feel Jack's smile against her cheek.

"Your father told you about your brother?" Irina asked softly with a small smile, holding tightly to Sydney's fingers and knowing that Jack must have, for Sydney to be sleeping with them as well.

Sydney nodded softly with a soft smile against her pillow feeling fresh tears pooling in her eyes. "Jack," She whispered saying her little brother's name and Irina nodded with a soft smile of her own, feeling her own tears welling. "Eric thinks our brother is Lena and my guardian angel with all the crazy stuff we've both survived." She maintained her whisper and looked down to her sister and then back at Irina with her smile growing thinking about it.

Irina's tears fell from her eyes and rolled over her nose as her smile grew and Jack pulled her tighter against him. "Yes." She spoke barely above a whisper, "I think he probably is." Her heavenly little boy was protecting and watching over his sisters like a good brother.

"I love you, Mom." Sydney smiled inhaling a shaky breath as a tear fell down her own cheek and Irina reached up to wipe it away.

"I love you too, Sweetheart." She smiled warmly taking a deep breath and bringing Sydney's hand to her lips for a kiss.

"Thank you for being just what I needed, all of you." She looked down to Lena's bright eyes and held Jack tighter.

They lay there talking softly for awhile, as it was still very early, before Sydney kissed all three of them and went and slid into bed with Vaughn with a smile, curling up next to him. His eyes opened slowly and lit into a smile seeing her beautiful dimple grin before she kissed him.

"Your Mom is ok?" He asked softly, pulling her into his arms and rubbing his nose with hers.

"Yeah, she's ok." She kissed him lightly and both of their eyes closed again with smiles on both of their faces.

"Jack," Irina ran her hand down the length of his arm as he continued to hold her, spooned up behind her as they watched Lena nursing. "Thank you for being there. For taking care of me last night, I'm sorry it came out that way."

"Irina," He sighed, kissing her face and neck, "Don't be sorry. You have nothing to be sorry about. You were in pain and you needed to let it out. I would've done anything to take that hurt away for you if I could." He kissed her bare shoulder again. "I love you."

Irina smiled feeling her tears well again hearing his words and the soft way he spoke; his tender touches, and kisses looking down at their baby now and thinking of the one they lost. "I love you…" She smiled and brushed her falling tears, feeling safe and loved in her husband's arms.

They lay together with Jack spooned behind her, his chin on her shoulder and hand entwined with hers on Lena's back watching their baby falling back to sleep, completely content and happy.

Jack disentangled himself from his girls and headed to the shower, stripping his clothes off and stepping into the steaming water, he closed his eyes and let the water pound away the stress and tension. His thoughts drifting to the son he'd never know, his daughters. and to Irina and the pain she went through. He loved her so intensely, he couldn't stand or bare to think of her ever in pain and vowed he wouldn't let her go through anything alone again.

Irina kissed her baby's head softly and laid her in the Moses basket, setting it on the floor beside her bed with a smile looking at Lena so sweet in her dreams. She removed her bandage from her arm and pulled her dress off, letting it drop to the floor, walking to the bathroom quietly and opened the glass door stepping in without Jack even noticing as his eyes were closed. She inched towards him, wrapping her arms around his waist and brought her lips to his when he smiled softly at her, his hands to her face, holding her against his mouth as his tongue caressed her warmth with tender kisses of love.

_***A Thousand Years-Part 2***_

His eyes raked over her body and the new wounds and deep ugly bruises. His hands reaching out gently to touch her while he washed her every inch, Irina's eyes locking onto his with so much in them he felt blinded with only the sight of her and what he felt inside.

Irina could barely breathe, feeling butterflies watching the man she loved take such tender care of her, worshiping her body and treating her like she was the most precious thing in the world. When he was finished she did the same for him and seized his lips in another long tender kiss letting their tongues dance and explore, taking their time.

She didn't want this man, she needed him, she loved him.

Jack grabbed a dark blue fluffy towel and dried her off with the same tenderness he had taken in washing her, tying it around her chest when he was finished and taking another one for himself. His breathing picked up standing in front of her; loving her with such an intense feeling he thought he would burst. His hand gently reached up to cup her face and his eyes darted to her lips, slowly bringing his face to hers, kissing her upper lip with such gentleness it brought tears to Irina's eyes. His kiss became hungry with his need to be one and his tongue, plunged into her depth, claiming her mouth as his own, and making her whimper with love, need and surrender. His hand pulled off his towel and then released hers, letting them drop to their feet before sweeping her up into his arms as their mouths continued to make love with each other, Irina's hands threading into his wet hair and pulling his face closer when he carried her to the bed and lay her gently on the top.

His knee hit the mattress and he slowly straddled her body as their mouths continued their dance, lowering himself carefully onto her, encasing her in his arms.

Irina raised her knee and pushed on his shoulder, rolling on top of him. She pushed herself up and off of him, hands and arms straddling his shoulders and Jack threaded his hands into her own wet brown locks, dangling down and framing her face.

Her intense eyes looking into his, causing him to lose himself as he brought her mouth down slowly to his. His tongue darting out to lave softly against her luscious smile and brushing lightly with her own warm tongue, sending a spark of electricity through the both of them.

Irina felt the intensity of need burning brightly as they stoked their fire of desire and rocked slowly against his body with her own, brushing him just lightly and stoking his own fire with her gently touches and soft caresses.

She hand never needed anyone like she needed him.

"I love you, Jack." She whispered with a smile looking into his eyes as she lay a sweet trail of kisses over his face from his closed eye lids to his bruised cheeks and down his jaw-line to his strong neck and throbbing pulse as his heart pounded in his chest beneath her weight. Her hands finding his and threaded their fingers together as she moved carefully down his chest, trailing her hot kisses and tongue, touching him softly and conveying her love for him through those kisses.

Jack wanted to reciprocate those feelings and flipped them quickly and gently, making her laugh softly in surprise seeing his smiling eyes. "My turn," His lips sealed his intentions with a deep and intense kiss, with his tongue delving into her hot cavern, exploring the familiar territory before making his way to her neck.

His tongue worshipping all of her pleasure points and lapping and teasing the one just below her ear, that he knew drove her nuts and made her inhale sharply, her fingers digging into his strong arms and she closed her eyes moaning softly in pleasure when his mouth sucked softly on the skin in the hollow of her throat, dipping his tongue in and swirling it around at a torturous pace.

Her fingers kneading into his arms and over his shoulders, feeling every curve and dip of his muscles as they made their way down his sides to his hips and pulled him closer.

The first brush of contact in their lower bodies making them both gasp with anticipation as she opened her legs wider, inviting and enveloping him when she wrapped her legs around him, holding him tightly to her as her heat radiated to him, his hardness pressed into her lower abdomen.

The feel of his throbbing shaft against her soft skin caused a wave of trembling to course his body from his lips to his toes as his body rocked into hers, his mouth moving down to appreciate her every inch.

Her breasts, heaving and beautiful with their hard peaks grazing against his chest working his way over her shoulders and down the scar paved valley between their perfect roundness. His tongue drawing lazy circles around their dark edges and flicking her glass tips, making her gasp softly with shaky breath as the sensation tore through her body and added more fuel to the fire burning inside her.

Her little mews and sounds of pleasure as her body reacted to his kisses and touch encouraging him as he felt her hands grip his firm ass and pull him closer into her, spreading further and wrapping around him tighter.

His tongue and teeth, nipping, sucking and laving softly at her gorgeous erect peaks and making Irina hold her breath with the sensation.

The heat between her legs beckoning to his rigid length and he longed to be buried deep inside her, making them one and complete.

He rolled them again and brought her on top of him, her drenched core sitting against his flaming flesh just above his shaft and making that eternal burn for her glow with a passion yearning to be satisfied.

Irina pushed back slowly against his chest to sit up-right as she looked down at him with adoring eyes and an ache in her heart for the man she loved that would never go away…

His eyes found hers as is hands moved up her thighs on each side of his body, pinning him to the bed; they rested on her hips and his eyes took in the breathtaking battered beauty before him, '_Her bruised and cut face, and arms, the deep black and purple bruises across her chest, ribs and abdomen from the bullets that had been slowed by the Kevlar but still left their mark._'

His fingers and palms lightly grazing them as they moved to cup her breasts softly, his thumbs grazing her nipples and causing Irina to inhale a long exaggerated breath, closing her eyes and letting her head fall back, enjoying his hands on her body; his loving caresses and the feel of their skin radiating heat and electricity together.

Her long hair dancing down and across almost the entire length of her back and falling over her shoulder as she leaned forward slowly and placed an open mouthed kiss directly over his heart, adding another soft kiss over the spot before sitting up again with a seductive smile of love.

"I love you, Irina; more then I could ever say." Jack studied his wife above him for a moment, her beauty stealing his breath as her love stole his heart. He pulled gently on her hand and Irina leaned forward with a smile, her hair tickling his chest as she leaned in to capture his lips and plunge her tongue into his welcoming mouth, his hands spanning the length of her firm behind and up her sculpted back; fingers trailing lazily down the center of her spine as they made full circles; her skin felt like silk beneath his fingertips.

Irina tilted her hips into him and thrust backwards, his tip plunging into her drenched folds, holding for just a moment when Jack gasped softly with the contact before thrusting herself slowly with measured pace onto his powerful length, making them both inhale long shaky breaths as he filled her tight space completely when she pushed off his chest and sat erect a top him, her weight pushing her body onto his entire length as her muscles contracted in a frenzied pace around him.

"You complete me, Jack in every way imaginable." She whispered softly with a soft smile, feeling tears of happiness stinging her eyes as her body adjusted and welcomed him home, a perfect fit.

Slowly, she rocked her hips that he gripped in his strong hands, feeling his body move in hers and caress each other in the most intimate of places.

She looked like an exotic goddess moving atop him, her long wavy mane cascading around her shoulders, falling across her chest and back, her sculpted body with all its scars and bruises, her beautiful breasts that swelled and peaked with his love and that for their baby; his love and attraction for her only deepening with the knowledge that her internal beauty surpassed that of the extraordinary external.

She was everything he never knew he always wanted and she was his and he was hers and for the rest of their lives, they were one.

Irina set the pace slow and intense, drawing out their torturous pleasure to a maximum as they drove and pulled each other to the edge, enjoying the journey as much as they could without any hurry, wanting to savor every touch, every look, every sensation they were invoking and evoking from the other.

Jack looked so beautiful beneath her, guiding her hips with his strong capable hands and his eyes baring into her very soul with the love, want and need for her she saw in them. His short steely gray hair, his strong jaw-line that was set firm and concentrated as he thrust in and pulled out of her slowly, feeling her body grip and caress him with her strong muscles, trying to keep him deep inside.

His strong, muscular shoulders and arms, the ridged pecks with their little dark peaks provided a base for her palms and she felt them ripple with every gentle move of his body.

She arched her back as his length went deeper and nestled her palm over her lower abdomen as she closed her eyes and felt him moving inside her, pushing her further toward the edge in their slow dance.

He moved his hand from her hip and laced his fingers with hers, placing them together as one over her taut abdomen and together felt his body moving inside of her…moving as one…and pressing with just enough force that Irina's breathing became rapid with the thoughts and feelings, the sensations and the emotions her body was reacting to. Seeing the emotions run through her eyes and then across her face, feeling himself moving inside of her against their palms and the quiver it was sending through her muscles fueled his fire and pushing him into the inferno with need and passion.

Both of their paces picked up and their rhythm never faltered as they drove each other further and further toward their ecstasy; small moans and gasps escaping behind clenched teeth and bit lips when the first twinges of nirvana ripped through her body and Jack was determined to hold on and make it last as long as continued with his rapid thrusting until Irina cried out and threw her head back, her hair brushing against his fingers as it fell down her back to her hips and her body rocked against his trembling and shivering atop him.

The strong muscles inside her gripping with erratic panic and pulling him over with her as he shattered within the radiating warmth of her body, praising her name and speaking his love as they trembled in ecstasy together with blinding force and brilliant stars of passion with hearts pounding and breath stolen…the moment frozen in time.

Jack pulled her down to lie on his chest when their waves of passion had both passed, wrapping his arms securely around her back and brushing her silky hair over her satiny skin, kissing the top of her head as they waited for their bodies to come down again. Jack could feel her heated breath on his skin and Irina closed her eyes, smiling contently as she listened to Jack's heart thundering below her ear feeling safe and very loved in his arms.

They lay quietly together for a few minutes as Jack played with her hair, lulling her to sleep and her weight covering him comforting him with peace and contentment. He realized that she was falling asleep as her breathing started to slow and even out and she hadn't eaten anything or taken any insulin since before her half bottle of vodka last night. After the energy of crying and then making love, she was due for some. He slowly rolled them over and heard her groan.

"You need to eat something and take some insulin." Jack whispered against her mouth before claiming it in a sweet kiss.

"I know, I was just thinking that myself." She smiled, opening her eyes at the loving husband who took such good care of her. "I was just completely content to stay where I was for the remainder of the day."

Jack laughed softly with a smile, "I would have no complaints to that." He dropped another kiss to her mouth, "But medical needs precede those of our hearts and pleasure principles at the moment." Jack started sliding off the bed and she caught his hand.

"You don't have to go. I can get it." She smiled warmly, looking up at him. "But Thank you."

Jack's heart melted seeing that smile and the fact it reached her eyes as she looked at him with her big brown pools of heaven.

Her naked body against the white comforter, her wild hair sprawled over the fluffy pillows behind her and one arm lazily perched around her head, she looked completely comfortable and he didn't want to disrupt that picture perfect pose he was sure he would remember forever; his beautiful wife glowing with sedation from their love-making and looking positively heavenly.

"I want to get it for you, you look absolutely serene right now and I don't want you to move." He kissed her hand and stood up, wrapping his towel around his waist again, tucking the hem into the edge securing it.

"Serene." Irina scrunched her eyebrows with a funny smile in thought, "Now that's one word I don't think anyone's every used to describe me before." She giggled softly.

"I may not have said it, but I've thought it many times. When you're with Lena or when Sydney was a baby especially when you're asleep." Jack smiled softly as his mind flashed through several moments he'd captured in his memory of her looking 'serene' over the years he'd known her."And I'm quite certain with as 'angelic' as you seem in your sleep now, your mother and father must have had the same thoughts about their 'serene angel' when you were a baby or a little girl sleeping."

He looked down at his own 'serene angel' baby in the basket beside the bed and back to Irina.

"I can't believe you've thought about what I was like as a baby and little girl." Irina's heart smiled at the thought that Jack had been thinking about her infancy and childhood and what kind of a baby or little girl she must have been…he was so amazing with his capacity to love her.

"Of course I would. You're the mother of my own little girls and one can't help but wonder what their mother must have been like at the same age. The beautiful baby and gorgeous little girl I knew you must have been; the cute things that they have done that I know don't come from me. Therefore, must come from you and I wonder and imagine you at the same age." His serious smile grew brightly seeing that he still had the ability to stun and take her breath away with his thoughts and words. "And after seeing your baby pictures and those of you as a little girl and growing up; I know my wondering thoughts about you were correct in their assumptions. You were the beautiful baby who became the gorgeous little girl and passed those traits onto our daughters."

"You never cease to amaze me, Jonathan Bristow." Irina felt the fresh tears of happiness as she released the breath she'd been holding.

"I'll be right back." Jack smiled, reaching for the door and quickly snuck out into the still darkened house as the sun had barely begun to rise.

Without Jack's warm body next to hers', Irina immediately began to feel the chill settle around her and pulled back the comforter, pushing it to the end of the bed as it was too warm for it, but pulled the smooth Egyptian cotton sheet up over her body.

She leaned forward and off to the side of the bed to glance over the edge to look at her sleeping angel in the basket below and smiled warmly, resting her chin over her fingers as she lay on the bed, looking over the side, just watching her sleep.

Lena had lost her pacifier and had decided that her thumb would suffice and now lay on her back with her head to the side, thumb in her mouth with her tiny forefinger curled over her nose in the most adorable pose Irina had ever seen. Her dark hair with its natural Mohawk contrasting sharply against the perfectly white lining of the soft basket interior and Irina leaned further over the side, dangling her arm to brush the back of her finger over her baby's smooth skin.

When Jack walked quietly into the bedroom, Irina was facing away from him, half covered in a sheet with her sexy back and the beginnings of her bottom exposed to him as she lay looking over the side of the bed at their baby; her dark wavy hair whipped around and bright brown eyes capturing her smile when she heard him approaching.

"Jack, you have to look at how she's sleeping." She smiled warmly, turning back to the baby and Jack's heart beat faster seeing her so happy in just observing their child.

_'She is a fantastic mother.'_ His own heart smiled. Jack looked down at Lena and smiled, laughing softly as her mouth started to suck furiously for a few seconds against her thumb and then went still again.

"She…is…beautiful." His eyes danced with the new day's light coming in through the window seeing his wife's beauty shining through their baby and Irina reached her hand out to him, pulling off his towel with the other and bringing him back into bed with a smile.

"You're beautiful." She eyed his naked form and kissed him when he laughed softly, at her look and her eagerness to bring him back into bed.

He handed Irina her little black case and what was left of a bottle of insulin from the refrigerator. She pricked her finger and squeezed it, testing her blood before drawing the necessary amount of insulin into the syringe.

"Oh, I'm pretty low." She bit her lip, realizing she hadn't exactly taken the best care of her body these last few days. "And I'm sure the alcohol last night on an empty stomach did nothing to help me." She sighed, shrugging her eyebrows in disgust at herself and slumping her shoulders as she flicked the syringe.

Jack's heart felt an instant wash of sadness thinking about her last night and the pain of finding out about their son and the terrible things that happened to both of them the immense pain Irina was in when he found her at the bar.

"Thank you for getting this for me." She leaned back against the headboard and pillows, pressing the needle into her abdominal muscles, knowing that was the fastest absorbing area on her body for insulin if she needed a quick fix.

With that task out of the way, Jack handed her a glass of OJ and a small bunch of grapes, pulling her back to rest against his chest as he leaned against the headboard and they watched the sun slowly rise over the pyramids out her window.

"This is one helluva view, Irina." He smiled, laughing softly holding her tightly to his chest as he looked down and watched his dark brunette beauty slide another luscious purple grape into her mouth. "I feel like Julius Casear in bed with the gorgeous Cleopatra right now watching the sunrise over the Nile and pyramids, naked, in bed and watching you eat your grapes so seductively."

Irina giggled softly against him, turning and sliding a large grape into his mouth and kissing him, tasting its juice in his mouth.

"You're not Julius Casear, you're my Marc Antony. He was a much better lover." She flashed him her brilliant smile, "A much better match all around and her true love." She tilted her head up again and he kissed her lips, laughing softly against them with her compliment.

"I think we definitely have to keep this house." Jack kissed her softly again and hovered his face close to hers, leaving just enough space for Irina to slide another grape into her mouth and drive him mad with desire once more. "A love palace with my Goddess."

When she finished she handed him the stem and he set it on the nightstand before they both slid down under the sheet again and he spooned up behind her with their knees slightly hand smoothed down her long tresses before snuggling his face into the back of her neck, inhaling the fantastic scent of Jasmine from her shampoo and wrapping his arms around her; one under her breasts and the other over abdomen and his already arousing desire pressing against her behind.

His warm breath tickled Irina's neck as she lay there with her eyes closed, her arms encircling his and her body humming with the intoxicating feeling he sent through her in waves of electricity. His body pressed so tightly to hers, she could feel its effect her close proximity was having on him as his arousal grew harder and pressed into her backside.

His warm breath on her ear becoming deep and ragged, his chest shaking and vibrating against her back when his thumb reached up to graze over her nipple… his other hand caressed the smooth skin over her abdomen. His wide thumb made slow circles around her peak, making it painfully stiff as he rubbed against her lightly from behind.

Irina's ragged breath matched his and pitched when he slowly slid his hand from her abdomen south, dancing in her dark patch of short curls as they inched their way between her folds.

His fingers stroking her lightly through her scent, feeling her knob swell with desire and inflamed heat as his touch ignited every tiny nerve ending, sending electrical impulses into her very core and making her body swirl with want and need. He moved his face gently against he nap of her neck, brushing it lightly before place a kiss to the delicate skin there and then moving to kiss her just behind her earlobe making her inhale sharply and filling her chest with air, causing her body rise and fall quickly under his arms. He placed a hot kiss to the top of her shoulder and against the crook of her neck while his fingers simultaneously rolled and pinched her nipple and swollen bud making Irina mew softly and pant. She began to squirm against his touch and pressed her rear into his groin pinning his hardness to his own abdomen while he rocked against her. His hand left her folds and she gasped and whimpered softly with the loss in contact as he moved his hand over her hip and grasped his length, forcing it down between her legs while his tongue danced lazily over her heated flesh on the back and side of her neck. His rock hard shaft pressed against her entrance as he began rocking slowly against her again, spreading her wetness along his length and Irina gripped his arms tightly with her fingers burning with desire.

She moved her hand down and lifted her leg slightly to align his head with her entrance and shifted her hips back and at an angle while she guided him into her slowly at first and then with a powerful thrust, buried himself deep inside her leaving her gasping and trembling in his arms as he moaned into her hair being enclosed into her heat once more. She lowered her leg again, enclosing him that much tighter inside her and Jack's hand trailed over her hips to her pleasure button, twisting and pinching it softly as she panted and hummed against her lips softly before he even began moving inside her.

He pulled out of her dramatically slow, leaving just his tip inside before plunging back into her swiftly with a graceful rhythm. Her enveloping tight heat, grasping and milking at him while her firm rear was pressed into his stomach burning into him with their erotically close contact and he bit her shoulder softly moaning as she clenched with everything she had when he began pulling out again. His angle inside of her pressing and stroking her most sensitive nerves and strengthening her already heightened awareness with every drive, caress and twist against her hardened peak and engorged knob as his hands continued to work in unison with his thrusting. Her gasps became pants and her moans in to incoherent small sounds in her throat with how good he felt against her and inside her.

Jack picked up on her body's cues that she was rapidly about to come and increased the speed of his fluid measures feeling the burn deep within himself and about to lose it any second as he panted and groaned into her neck. Her hand lying over her abdomen pressing against his head igniting the fireworks soon to come inside her as he pumped and Jack moved his hand from her folds to press his hand over hers, threaded their fingers and pressing harder with her as he drove deeper.

His hips jerked when he thrust and came urgently inside of her, and Irina felt his explosion course through her inside, against her hand and around her body as his shuddered and rocked continuously pumping and pushing her over the edge until she fell as well, coming with a loud moan through clenched teeth and tight lips as she buried her face into her pillow and Jack moaning into her neck feeling her body quiver around him internally blasting him with her shockwaves of pleasure and drenching him with her essence. His body continuing to rock against her as she rode out her ecstasy and Jack placed several kisses against the soft curve of her neck, behind her ear and over her shoulder whispering words of love as she gripped him tightly with her body.

With their breath calming and exhaustion taking over, Jack withdrew and snuggled closer, burying his face into her neck again with his arms wrapped securely around her, hers' around his as they both fell asleep again.

* * *

A few hours later, the rest of the house including Jack, was awoken to a soft sound of music and smell of good food coming from downstairs and when they sleepily entered the kitchen found Irina with Lena sitting in the Bouncy Seat, all smiles and making breakfast as she bobbed her head to the song on the radio, singing softly to Lena sitting on the counter and smiling madly and gurgling at her funny Mama.

Their faces all lit into smiles hearing Irina singing to the baby and all smiles after last night, especially Sark witnessing yet another example of the side of Irina he never knew and already loved.

"Good morning." She smiled at all of them, glowing in happiness, setting a plate of toast into on the table next to everything else which was already prepared and waiting.

"Morning Mom." Sydney's smiled brightly as she hugged Irina tightly, kissing her cheek.

"Morning Sweetheart." Irina returned the hug and kiss and opened her arms for the next incoming hug and kiss from Vaughn, then Weiss and soon everyone followed suit including a hesitant Sark whom she snagged his t-shirt and forcefully turned him into her arms with a big smile and kiss, the look in her eyes saying, 'You're not getting away from me without a hug and kiss!' Even Dixon accepted the hug and unexpected kiss to the cheek, which made him blush and smile madly.

Any uneasiness and tension lingering from last night lifted seeing Irina so happy this morning and laughing with them as they watched her continue singing to Lena with bright eyes and making the baby laugh as she finished squeezing the orange juice. She set the glass pitcher of juice on the table just over Jack's shoulder and turned his face with her fingers gripping his chin, still singing and smiling, she dropped a kiss to his lips as everyone 'awed' them with their cuteness.

* * *

"So how is your leg, Sweetheart?" Irina asked between breaths as she pushed Lena in the Baby Jogger, running along side Sydney, headed towards home.

They had been home from Egypt for a few days and settled back into their lives and work, searching for Cuvee had become the top priority.

"It's ok actually." Sydney huffed, her mother's pace was maddening to keep up with but she was holding her own. "I'm going to have a nasty scar but that's life isn't it?" She turned her head and smiled.

"In this job, yes." Irina nodded with her own smile. Their bruises were fading and now a pale green, the cut on her cheek slowly fading and the stitches in her arms were almost ready for removal. The cut on Sydney's thigh had been so deep, she needed two layers of stitches to close the wound and Irina had been concerned about her running on it. "Are you going to stay for dinner?" Irina asked swerving around the corner of the street, waving to two little girls in their neighbor's front yard with smiles as the security team followed them down the home stretch.

"As much as I would love to hear stories about you as a Professor from your former students," Sydney laughed pushing a stray hair behind her ear as they ran,

"Beck is playing at the _House of Blues_ tonight and we all decided to go. So, I'm going to have to take a rain check on hearing about Professor Bristow."

"Well, hey, that sounds like fun!" Irina's smile lit her face, hearing that her daughter was living her life outside the CIA and world of espionage. "And if I didn't already have dinner plans with the Petersons, I would drag your father down there and join you!" She laughed and Sydney did too thinking about her father at the House of Blues listening to Beck. "What time is the show?" Irina's feet thundered on, her body slicked with sweat and ponytail bobbing with her stride, she pushed her own stray hairs behind her ears.

Both women were wearing sports bras and running Capri pants, Irina in black and Sydney in red, their favorite colors.

"It doesn't start until nine, but I think we're going to grab something to eat before hand." Sydney jumped the handle of a red wagon jutting out into the sidewalk path in front of a house on their street. "I think we're coming to pick up Sark at 7:30." She added softly, watching Irina's head whip to hers with that statement.

"Julian's going with you?" Irina asked in surprise, not believing that Sydney had actually asked him to go out with her and her friends.

"Yeah." She inhaled a deep breath as their fast pace continued, "It doesn't look as though he's going to leave my life anytime soon so…I figured I might as well try and make some sort of effort with him for your sake." She shrugged her eyebrows.

"Sydney…" Irina began feeling badly, "I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do just for 'my sake.' As much as I would love for us all to get along some day, I know that he hurt you…and I don't want to hurt you even more by having you believe you 'must' interact with him outside of work to make me happy…I will love you regardless…both of you…" She turned her head to look at her daughter.

"I know, Mom." Sydney gave her a small smile in return. "But I love you too and I want to try with him because of that love for you and if truth be told. He's not that bad and nothing I can't handle. Not that I forgive him at all for killing my best friend and torturing the other but we've come to an understanding of sorts I guess he and I, we're both trying."

Irina's smile grew hearing this. "I'm very proud of you, Sydney. Your heart is the biggest I've known."

"I get that from you, my oversized heart," Sydney smiled and laughed, teasing her mom, "So I hear, that and something about our DNA and platelets?"

"Funny, Ha ha, Sweetheart." Irina started laughing too, thinking about their Rambaldi foretold differences then that of their fellow humans.

"Kidding aside, I'm serious, Mom. You're ability and capacity for love astounds me. That's what I remember from my childhood; that I wanted to be just like you, my mother, the woman with the enormous heart and smile. You always put other people first…always took care of Dad and I helped any and everyone out when they needed it, and now after we've found each other again. I see that you've never stopped doing that." Sydney smiled brightly, slowing their pace down nearing their house. "Trying to protect me and Dad all these years, your own family, Katya and the twins, Vaughn's family, the whole of Russia."

"Not always." Irina gave her, a small smile of regret, "When I turned myself into the CIA. It was out of my own selfishness to see you, interact with you and to steal information about the Rambaldi artifacts."

"True. But, " Sydney looked at her with raised eyebrows, using her own teacher tone, "You used your Rambaldi information to try to keep me safe and you put me first when you helped give me time to escape in Taipei and when I blackmailed you into going back to Kashmir…you did that for me." Sydney added softly and watched as Irina's eyes went to the pavement, taking a deep breath and fingering another wild hair over her ear. "You also gave Dad and I the keys to escape, risking yourself when they captured us…you put us first."

Irina remained quiet a moment. "Sydney, you are my child and I would do anything, 'anything," She looked over at her daughter pointedly, "For you. I'ts just something that goes along with being a parent. Your father and I both feel that way. Sometimes, we do things that end up hurting you in order to keep you safe, to keep you alive…and I know you can't stand that but someday you will understand." She slowed her jog to a walk as they entered the driveway and stopped, starting to stretch out their muscles as a cool down. "Someday, when you're a mother you will realize there are times as a parent when you must hurt or disappoint your child in some way, for their own good. I know that sounds ridiculous and absurd but its true…for example, my leaving you and your father…it hurt you, it hurt him and it hurt me but it was the only way to keep the both of you safe, and so, I had to hurt you by leaving." Irina said softly, looking in her daughter's big brown eyes as she pulled her foot up behind her, stretching out her quad.

"You're right, I don't like it when you guys do that but…I understand now, why you do…I know you do it because you love me and want to protect me. It doesn't stop me from being annoyed by it though." Sydney cracked a smile and laughed, stretching out her own leg muscles.

"There is no way for me to express how much l love you, in a way for you to understand its depths. The love between a mother and her child is so intimate because you are literally a part of me came from my own body and grew inside me." Irina reached out and cupped her daughter's chin, forcing her to look into her own black depths. "On the day your own child is born and you look into their beautiful eyes then, then you will understand just how much I love you as only a mother can." She smiled softly as Sydney did with tears pooling in her eyes.

She knew her mother's love was powerful, it is what she remembered and survived on for the twenty-one years without her but seeing look in her mother's eyes was so intense, she felt it burn straight into her heart.

"I only pray that I can be half the mother to my children, as you are to us, Mom." Sydney smiled warmly, looking from Irina down to Lena asleep in the Jogger.

There were no words so Irina grabbed her into her arms, hugging her tightly and kissing her sweaty head with a smile.

"You are the most amazing person I've ever met, Sydney Anne. I've no doubt that you'll be twice the mother I am or have been. For one, you will actually 'raise' your child!" Irina pulled back, cupping Sydney's face with a laugh and a smile.

"Mom." Sydney smiled, and shook her head that Irina was essentially making fun of herself, "You did 'raise' me in a way. Your memory is what guided me every hour of every day for all the years you weren't able to be with me." Sydney said quickly surprising her mother and dropping a quick kiss to Irina's cheek before squatting down to retrieve her sister, leaving Irina standing above them with unshed tears and surprise. Sydney scooped up the sleeping baby into her arms and headed up the steps, turning to call to her mother still standing there frozen, "Mom, come on." She smiled radiantly with her little giggle. Irina snapped out of her daze and smiled, traipsing up the steps after them.

"Well look at you two sweaty beauties." Jack smiled with a laugh watching them enter the kitchen where he was reading through some files. He loved this look about Irina. Her loose ponytail with the stray wisps of hair and the little curls that formed around her face and neck when she was sweaty, she looked so cute as she blew the hair off her face and took a drink of juice. "Sydney, are you staying for dinner?" Jack asked closing the file and moving towards Irina to kiss her 'hello.'

"She has plans, Sweetheart. Our daughter has better things to do then hang out with her parents in her free time." Irina winked at Sydney and laughed when Jack swooped her into his arms quickly kissing her neck, cheek and then her mouth with a smile of his own making Irina laugh against his mouth, wrapping her sweaty arms around him still in his nice work suit.

"You two are nuts!" Sydney smiled and laughed watching her parents, so obviously in love with one another and remembered they had been like this when she was little as well.

"You're just now realizing this?" Irina turned her head to look at Sydney with raised eyebrows with a smile as Jack planted another kiss to her temple.

"Oh no, not 'just' realizing it. Just saying it out loud to remind you that I know!" Sydney laughed at their reactions setting her empty glass on the sink as she turned Lena in her arms.

Sark entered the kitchen moments later, his arm still in a sling from being shot but was certainly on the mend. He paused in the doorway then turned quickly, unsure if he was interrupting a 'family' moment.

"Julian…Where are you going?" Irina called in her singsong voice seeing his form retreating.

"I didn't want to interrupt." Sark returned cautiously taking in the forms before him.

"You weren't interrupting anything." Irina smiled warmly at him, trying her best to make him feel welcome. "How is your arm?"

"Healing and ready to be rid of this sling." Sark pulled on the white fabric strap that was annoying his neck by rubbing on it.

"Not until that vein is completely healed you don't!" Irina narrowed her eyebrows, using her motherly scorn.

"Yes ma'am." Sark mock saluted her cracking a smile out of both Jack and Sydney.

"I've got to get going if I am going to have time to go home, shower and get ready and be back here to pick him up before 7:30." Sydney turned to her mother and passed the baby off gently with a smile. "I'll see you guys later." She kissed Lena's cheek, then Irina's and Jack's.

"Goodbye Sweetheart." Irina smiled watching Sydney walk out of the kitchen and pause.

"7:30…ok?" Sydney turned to Sark with apprehension at 'trying' with him.

"Yes ma'am." Sark repeated with a small smile as Irina giggled softly. "I will be ready and waiting with bells on."

"Skip the bells, just be ready!" Sydney rolled her eyes with a smug grin and left.

"I'm hitting the shower." Irina smiled and turned her head to capture Jack's lips quickly before smiling at Julian and touching his arm lightly as she and the baby made their way upstairs…happy that her mixed family was slowly working things out.

"So…you're going out with the Musketeers?" Jack leaned against the counter, crossing his arms and staring at Sark with an amused smile thinking about Sark out of the town in LA with his daughter, her fiancé and Weiss…actually doing something 'fun' for his age.

"Yes and I must admit I am slightly apprehensive about doing such a thing. I feel completely out of my realm." Sark replied softly, raising his eyebrows as he played with the hem on his sling.

"Don't think too much and you'll have a good time." Jack gave him some advice, "You might even have, dare I say…'_fun_." He smirked and Sark shook his head with a grin, looking at the wooden top of the kitchen island.

* * *

Irina placed the sleeping baby on the bed as she stripped off her sweaty cloths. Lena awoke and began looking around, smiling once she caught sight of her mother and started kicking her legs and moving her arms getting her attention.

"Well 'hello,' my Sweet Girl!" Irina cooed in Russian, smiling at her happy baby. "You want to take a shower with Mama?" She tickled her baby, realizing that she and Sydney had both held the baby in their sweaty arms. She took of Lena's clothes and held her close against her chest, naked skin on naked skin when she stepped into the shower.

Lena shivered making a funny face when the water first hit her little body, having never had a shower before and making Irina laugh. She started washing the baby first, talking to her the entire time and getting her to smile and laugh.

Jack had come upstairs to change clothes and heard her talking to the baby from the bathroom and opened the door with a curious smile to listen. Behind the steamy glass he could see his wife holding their baby in her arms and washing her while they both smiled and laughed. He quickly stripped off his own clothes and stepped inside to join them.

"Hope you two don't mind, but I just couldn't miss this." Jack smiled broadly as Lena's eyes turned to his and smiled.

"We don't mind at all." Irina flashed him her beautiful smile and moved Lena's naked little body against her chest to wash her back. Lena immediately found her thumb and started sucking on it, laying her head against Irina's chest as her Mama washed her back and head. Jack's smile only grew and leaned forward, kissing Irina soundly on the mouth.

"I love you." He smiled remaining close to her face and grabbing her wet head again for another kiss before dropping kisses to Lena's head, neck and back. "Let me help you." He inched by her, their slippery bodies sliding off one another and stood behind her, lathering up Irina's hair with shampoo as she finished washing the baby.

"This is a good system we have here," Irina laughed softly as they stood in a line, bathing each other, "Only problem is, who is washing you?"

"You can when we trade." He whispered into her ear and waggled his eyebrows, dropping a kiss to her shoulder.

"Mmmm, ok." She smiled at the idea and sighed happily as his fingers worked their magic in her hair and against her scalp, rinsing out the soap. Lena started to fuss, not satisfied with her thumb anymore and Irina turned her in her arms again so she could nurse.

"Well that's convenient." Jack smiled and laughed, looking over Irina's shoulder at their baby in her arms, nursing happily as they let the warm water cascade over them. "Nature is a beautiful thing…" He ran his hands down Irina's arms that encircled their child, holding them both in his arms as he stood closely behind them, just watching in continuous amazement at the marvel's of a woman's body. "It still amazes me that we could make something so perfect together. We literally made love when we created her."

"Yes." Irina smiled happily, her thumb running over Lena's wet head with her body pressed to Jack's, having similar thoughts at just that moment. "The physical manifestation of our love." She turned her head and caught his lips in a slow and tender kiss. "I love you." She smiled warmly when they separated.

"I think we 'make love' pretty damn well, my wife." Jack smiled brightly, dropping a soft kiss to Lena's forehead thinking about his beautiful children. "We make beautiful babies together."

"I won't argue with you there, my husband." Irina ran her fingers down Lena's arm as she clutched Irina's breast with her palm as she always did and Jack finished washing Irina. Irina handed the baby to Jack so she could wash him and within seconds, Lena was crying at the loss of contact from Irina.

"I'm sorry, Peanut!" Jack tried to nuzzle her as she cried against his chest and into his neck, "I just don't have Mommy's fun parts and Wet Bar." He smiled and laughed when Irina narrowed her eyebrows and pinched him for his comment.

"Jack!" Irina rolled her eyes as his smiled seductively at her chest and waggled his eyebrows. "Here." She motioned for him to give her back the baby who wouldn't stop crying.

He slid her slippery little body back to her mother and watched as she quieted instantly back in her mother's arms and nursing happily at the source of her desire.

"Well, I tried." Irina shrugged with a smile at her attempt to return the favor of washing him.

"Hey, I have no complaints." Jack smiled widely, lathering up his head with shampoo as he watched her standing before him, naked, wet and nursing their baby. "Have I told you how beautiful you are today?" His eyes scanned her body and then her smiling face. "This is one of those moments where you look serene. Standing here in front of me. Naked as a Jay Bird, all wet and completely content nursing our naked 'love child."

Irina burst out laughing and he did too.

"Why is that funny?" He raised his eyebrows as he stepped beneath the spray, rinsing his hair acting mystified. "I remember doing the same thing we are now with Sydney as a baby. Only our shower had those ugly blue tiles then, remember?" He laughed and Irina nodded, remembering well.

"Yeah, I remember." She giggled, picturing Sydney at the same age with them in the shower. "I also remember when she was two and used to take showers with me…she would push her hands and face up against the glass."

"And make faces at me while I got ready for work." Jack smiled, remembering as well and they both started laughing with the memory. "Oh God, she was cute! I can't believe she's all grown up already." He sighed thinking about his beautiful daughter.

"She may be a woman but she'll forever and always be my little girl." Irina smiled warmly and Jack nodded in agreement.

"Exactly. Which is why it's been so difficult to let her grow up." Jack smiled softly, plunging the mesh sponge across his chest.

"She and I were talking about this on our run." Irina looked down from his beautiful smiling eyes to their baby's. "The love a parent feels for their child…willing to do anything and everything to keep them from harm and pain." Her eyes met his again with a smile. He nodded and leaned over, placing his hand over Lena's on Irina's chest and kissing her little head softly, knowing how true that statement was. He would die before letting something happen to his girls. They finished and got ready quickly before diving headlong into making dinner for their guests on their way.


	50. Chapter 50

_**AN: Music for this Chapter (on repeat): When A Man Loves A Woman by Brian Adams, All I've Ever Needed by Paul McDonald and Nikki Reed**_

* * *

FIFTY

o

Irina was talking on the phone with a member of her Russian cabinet, discussing the upcoming Coronation and government transition and was just finishing putting the silverware on the table when they heard the doorbell ring.

"I'll get it." Jack smiled from across the table seeing she was on the phone, he made his way towards their door. Irina smiled in appreciation at his retreating form. He looked damn sexy in her favorite color. Black dress pants, and a lightweight black sweater…something she had picked out for him and couldn't wait to tear off.

"Hello and Welcome!" Jack smiled warmly at the cute couple before him, a small chuckle inside of him at entertaining guests with Irina as a couple for the first time in over twenty years.

"Hello Mr. Bristow." Dr. Ryan Peterson greeted Jack as he ushered his wife inside and handed him a bottle of champagne. "Thank you for having us." He smiled nervously, clasping his hands and fidgeting somewhat nervously, spotting Irina standing at the French doors talking on the phone in Russian and returned the little wave she gave to them with a big smile.

"It's our pleasure to have you. Irina and I have been looking forward to having you over for sometime." Jack closed the door behind them. "And please call me Jack." He smiled at the both of them.

"Ok…Jack," Ryan smiled, clasping his wife's hand, "I'd like to introduce you to my wife, Ann."

The woman was staring wide-eyed at Irina since the moment she entered the house, not believing what she was really seeing.

"Ann, it's a pleasure to meet you." Jack kissed her cheek with a smile, "Irina has told me many times that you were her favorite student. I know she's excited to talk with you."

That statement seemed to light up the woman's eyes as she turned her attention back to her mentor who had her back to them, arms folded over her chest, looking outside.

"It's a pleasure to meet you as well, Mr. Bristow. I just can't believe that's her; that I'm standing here looking at her, in her house." She gaped and the men laughed softly. "And she's speaking in Russian!" That fact seemed to make it all a reality for her…that her former Professor was in fact a Russian spy.

"Yes, she is." Jack chuckled at the woman's awe, "Let's open this and have a drink while we wait for her to finish her business call." He ushered them into the kitchen, giving Irina her space, knowing the call was important.

"You have a beautiful home!" Ann smiled widely, taking in her beautiful surroundings.

"Thank you." Jack smiled, popping the bottle of champagne and pouring it into four flutes.

"You have two black eyes!" Ann suddenly noticed the pale green on Jack's face and he laughed softly looking down. "What happened?"

"Yes, a job hazard I'm afraid." Jack chuckled and handed them each a flute.

"Ohhh." Ann's eyes went wide, remembering who this man worked for. "I must tell you, I've read all about your lives and the incredibly beautiful love story between the two of you…absolutely fascinating." She smiled widely taking a seat at the kitchen island, "I couldn't believe it when Ryan came home and told me that he had taken care of Professor Bristow. You could have knocked me over with a feather! Finding out she was still alive…and then her story! She's absolutely amazing!"

"Yes," Jack smiled, leaning against the counter. "I think we were all quite stunned to find out about Irina."

"Sorry about that." Irina smiled with her phone in hand as she entered the kitchen. "Business." Her smile widened looking at the couple before her, "Look at the two of you! I just knew it!" She laughed softly remembering their electricity radiating in her class, reaching out to hug Ann. "Ann Bartholomew…my favorite student!"

"I can't believe you're alive!" Ann's eyes were still wide looking at Irina as she maintained holding onto her hands. "And you're still so beautiful!" She added and Irina laughed more blushing even.

"Well 'Thank you'…I could say the same for you!" Irina smiled at the dark haired younger woman.

"And you have bruises, too!"Ann's eyes looked at Irina in shock and then to Jack, wondering what the hell had happened.

"Job hazard." Irina chuckled and the guys laughed out loud as Jack had said the same thing.

"So I gather." Ann smiled laughing with them, "Never in a million years would I have thought you a spy for the KGB back then…nope, never." She shook her head in disbelief to this day. "And the daughter of Anastasia Romanov! The next Tsar of Russia. I feel so privileged and honored that I was your student. You were a brilliant teacher. You're the reason I went into teaching!"

"I loved having you in my class. You were an amazing student! Unlike your husband here." She smiled her famous grin, teasing the doctor and making him blush with it.

"Yeah you gave me 'D' on my last mid-term!" Ryan laughed in mock disappointment. "I was clearly not the teacher's pet my wife was!"

"Oh Dr. Peterson, you were one of my favorites. You drove me nuts, but you were still one of my favorites." Irina laughed as did everyone else, "And the assignment was to turn in at least a thirty page paper on the works of Shakespeare. If the paper was excellent, I would except less for the page count but you. you only turned in nine pages! You're lucky you got a passing grade!" She added and they all burst into laughter, "As I recall, those nine pages were mainly about you ranting on, '_why you shouldn't have to write about some dead guy who was seriously disturbed and spoke ridiculous English_."

"How in the world do you remember that?" Ryan shook his head in amazement that after twenty years, she still remembered what one of her students had written.

"Because I was laughing the entire time I was grading it!" Irina smiled widely, "It was one of the funniest things I'd ever read; which is why I gave you a passing grade, Dr. Peterson!" Her smile grew as they all laughed again.

"Please, call me Ryan." The man blushed at his former Mrs. Robinson.

Yuriy entered the kitchen looking apologetic for disturbing and carrying two packages.

"Sorry to interrupt, your Highness, but these just arrived for the both of you." He smiled warmly at Irina and nodded at her guests, handing a package to Jack and one to Irina.

Irina blushed thinking about what was in the small white box in her hands from the CIA and Jack's was a stack of requested files he'd asked to be delivered to work on over the weekend.

"Thank you, Yuriy." Irina thanked the man in Russian before he stepped outside again and Jack took Irina's package with his.

"I'll put these in the office." He smiled warmly, kissing her cheek as he scooted out of the kitchen.

"Your Highness…" Ann repeated in awe, "I keep forgetting that you're royalty. I'm sorry for not addressing you as such. What is the proper way to address you?" The woman asked nervously.

"Please, I am just Irina." She grasped the woman's hand sweetly.

"Irina," Sark entered the kitchen carrying Lena in one arm, looking at the strangers in the kitchen with fascination, "She was awake in her crib."

Irina scooped up the baby and smiled brightly, kissing her all over before making introductions.

"Julian, these are two of my former students Ann and Ryan Peterson, Ann and Ryan this is my son." She looked back to Julian with a warm smile and saw his surprise, "Julian."

"I didn't know you had a son, too!" Ryan smiled and shook the young man's hand, "It's a pleasure, Julian."

"I've raised Julian since he was five years old," Irina smiled widely, "For all intent and purposes, he is my son."

Sark felt like he could cry and rapidly had to bring his emotions under control with Irina's introduction, especially after learning about her son with Jack.

"Well it's a pleasure to meet you, Julian." Ann stood and kissed his cheeks, "And from the looks of it…you must be in the same hazardous business as your mom." She looked between two and saw the intense gaze they shared.

'_She just referred to Irina as my 'mom_,' Sark gulped with the reality and felt a surge of pride that came with that entitlement to call her his 'mom.'

"And this little beauty must be Lena!" Ann moved right on, cooing over the baby in Irina's arms, "Oh God, she's beautiful!" She ran her hand over the baby's smooth dark hair. "Look at those intense eyes!"

"Thank you." Irina smiled widely with motherly pride, "Would you like to hold her?" She saw the itch in the woman to hold the baby.

"Oh yes! I would love to!" Ann lit up with glee, carefully taking the baby from Irina. "Oh, she's so little!" She snuggled her cheek against Lena's little head. "And she smells so good!"

Irina looked over to Julian who was still frozen in the moment. She saw his reaction to hearing her being referred to as his 'mom,' and felt a sense of joy come over her.

"Dr. Peterson is the one responsible for saving my life, Julian…after the Execution." She added quietly, looking from him to the man that saved her life.

Sark had seen the doctor at the JTTF training and monitoring Irina but had no idea who he was. "You have my deepest sense of gratitude." Sark extended his hand once more to thank the man for saving the most important person in his life.

"I really don't deserve the credit. Irina fought her way back on her own…with the help of this little miracle." He reached out to stroke Lena's head with a smile.

"Look who I found at the door." Jack smiled widely, entering the kitchen followed by Sydney, Vaughn and Weiss all of them still recovering from bruises and Weiss's arm in an immobilizer.

"Oh my goodness, you people must have been in some battle!" Ann looked over the damage and her eyes went wide again as everyone laughed softly.

"Ann I would like to introduce you to my daughter Sydney," Irina beamed proudly, kissing Sydney's head. "My future son-in-law Michael Vaughn and our dear friend Eric Weiss." Irina winked at Weiss and he felt his heart skip a beat with that smile. "Ryan, I believe you know everyone already."

"Oh Sydney! You're so beautiful! Just like your mother! She used to talk about you all the time when you were little!" The woman gave Sydney a big hug, smiling from ear to ear, "Telling us about all the insane things you used to do like jumping out of trees and riding your tricycle off the sofa! She had us all in stitches with her latest 'trip the emergency room story!"Ann sat back down and everyone laughed having just heard these stories about Syd in the desert last week. "And congratulations on the engagement!" Her eyes lit up, "I just read the beautiful article in _People_ yesterday! Such a beautiful love story like your parents! And what a gorgeous engagement picture!"

"Thank you." Sydney blushed, taking hold of Vaughn's hand and snuggling against his shoulder with a big smile. "We haven't even seen the article yet, I have no idea what it says."

"I have a copy of it in my office." Jack admitted with a small smile of fatherly pride. "You can take it with you if you promise to bring it back."

"Ok Dad." Sydney laughed, as did everyone else when she leaned over and kissed his cheek, about his funny insistence he get it back. "I'll bring it back."

"It's my little girl's engagement announcement to the world. I want to keep it." Jack smiled softly, wrapping his arms around Irina from behind, resting his chin on her head as everyone 'awed' his sentimentality.

"Speaking of articles." Ryan set his glass of champagne down and retrieved a rolled up magazine from his jacket pocket with a smile. "This just came out today and I saw it at work, had to pick one up for you." He handed Irina a copy of UCLA's magazine.

"Whoa Mom, look at you!" Sydney smiled madly at the photos on the front. "Professor Bristow." She read the name with pride.

"Holy Hades, Irina…Talk about Mrs. Robinson!" Weiss sucked in his breath staring at her photo from her time at UCLA. "No way I would have learned anything in your class! No way I could concentrate!" He added and everyone laughed, except Irina who just shook her head with a smile.

"I had that problem." Ryan added, sipping his champagne and everyone laughed deeply again. "Between sitting next to my future wife and being lectured by Mrs. Robinson. I was doomed to fail." He kissed his wife's head when she smiled and laughed at him, knowing all about his former obsession with their beautiful Professor having talked about it and their mutual admirations and respect for her after her supposed death and several other times over the years."She used to sit on the corner of her desk, with her legs crossed in a skirt while she read to us and 'we' were supposed to listen and pay attention. Now how in the world she expected any of us to do that when she was sitting their with those legs in our face is beyond me!" He added and everyone but Irina burst out laughing again at Irina, as she looked down embarrassed.

"Well I managed to pay attention and learn something!" Ann clasped Irina's forearm with her hand, smiling and jumping to Irina's defense.

"That's because you're a woman, Honey. You didn't have a crush on her like every other male in that class did!" He laughed as everyone else kept laughing as well.

"I don't know about that, Dear, I can think of a few women, especially that nice girl Karen Finkle, whose crush on our Professor rivaled that of the men!" Ann arched her eyebrows with a smug grin as everyone died in laughter, except Irina who was smiling but turning slightly red.

"Oh my God, that's hysterical!" Weiss howled with laughter, "Lesbian lust for Professor Bristow! That's hot!" He died in laughter again as did everyone else with tears in their eyes and finally, Irina cracked and laughed with them.

"Wait, wasn't that the girl you always told me would stay late after class and arrive early, asking you pointless questions?" Jack furrowed his brow in thought then died laughing when he realized he was right from the look in Irina's face.

"I love it! Why couldn't you have been my English Lit. Professor!? What an entertaining class that must have been!" Weiss gasped for breath in between laughs.

"Ok children!" Irina started ushering them out of the kitchen, before anymore embarrassing moments were revealed. "Time for you to go and have fun now!" She pushed on their backs and only made them laugh harder at her attempt to get rid of them.

"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!" Sydney tried to put on the brakes and slow them down while she giggled, "Mom, what time are we going shopping tomorrow?" She wheeled around as everyone kept chuckling.

"Oh Sweetheart," Irina's face fell as she caught Sydney's face with her hand, "I can't go now. I got a call earlier and I actually have to go to Moscow late tonight." She shrugged pained and sheepishly, wishing she didn't have to. "I'm so sorry."

"What?" Sydney looked deflated. She and Irina were going wedding shopping tomorrow and Jack's eyes went wide as well, having just heard it for the first time. "Why?"

"I have a meeting with the Cabinet and Vladimir that I have to be in attendance for. I'm sorry, Sweetie, I was looking forward to a 'girl's day out' as much as you. I promise we'll go as soon as I get back, ok?" Irina hated the fallen look in Sydney's face; she hated disappointing her daughter.

"It's ok, Mom, I get it. It's important." Sydney turned her frown into a smile, "We'll go when you get back!" Irina returned the smile, thankful for Sydney's, "What time are you leaving?"

"Early, I probably won't see you until I return on Wednesday so give me a big hug." Irina smiled sadly and grabbed her daughter, holding her tightly as the Peterson's watched with captivated fascination hearing talk of Russia and President Putin and Irina's involvement with it all.

Sydney pulled her mother close, and kissed Irina and then Lena, knowing that if here mother was leaving, so was her sister. Irina kissed her cheeks, forehead and lips, hating to say 'goodbye.'

"Be safe Mom. I love you." Sydney kissed and hugged her one more time and stepped back to hug her father as Irina kissed and hugged Weiss, then Vaughn and finally Julian 'goodbye.'

"I love you, too. Have fun." Irina smiled as Jack returned from his office with the magazine handing it to Sydney.

"Whoa Syd, you look smokin'!" Weiss nodded enthusiastically with a smile and Vaughn laughed, "You don't look bad either, Mike." He smiled until he read the caption and died laughing again, "_Hunky Spy-beau_!' Oh, you are so not living this one down!"

"Oh be quiet." Vaughn sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Ok Irina, another little kiss, right here." Weiss smirked pointing to his cheek again and she smiled and gave him another quick peck as Vaughn and Sydney muttered '_oh brother_' on the porch at Weiss and his infatuation with Irina.

"Da svidanya." Irina waved to them as they headed down the steps.

"You have a beautiful family." Ann smiled watching the older kids leave, laughing and smiling. "Your daughter is just gorgeous!" She gushed over Sydney.

"Thank you." Irina and Jack both smiled and replied simultaneously making everyone laugh softly.

"And her fiancé is quite the cutie!" Ann continued to smile as she ran her hand down Lena's head.

Irina smiled brightly, laughing softly, "Yes, he is a cutie. He's also the son of my childhood best friend in Russia."

"Really?" Ann's eyes went wide as she followed Irina into the kitchen and Jack and Ryan shared a look that said 'women!'

They enjoyed their dinner and chatted for few hours before the Petersons had to go and relieve their babysitter.

Jack had helped Irina finish cleaning up before they headed upstairs, knowing Irina had to leave for Moscow in an hour.

"I had a good time tonight, did you?" She asked sweetly with obvious tiredness, pulling her shirt over her head watching Jack undress with a smile.

"I did too. It's been a long time since I…we, had anyone over for dinner as a couple." He smiled warmly pulling his own sweater off. "I hate that you're leaving in an hour." He admitted after a moment of watching her strip off her clothes to put more comfortable clothes on for the long flight ahead.

"I know." Irina sighed, pulling out a pair of pink yoga pants, and matching, form fitting zipped sweatshirt with hood. "I don't like it either." She gave him a small smile, flipping her hair over her shoulder slipping her foot into her pant leg. "I will make this trip as fast as possible."

_***When A Man Loves A Woman***_

"Dance with me?" Jack grabbed her arm softly, standing beside her in just his pants with a deviant smile.

Irina folded into his arms, and Jack pulled her close, inhaling the scent of her shampoo and then nuzzling into her neck smelling her perfume. Irina rested her cheek against his, closing her eyes as she let him guide her slowly in their own little dance with a smile, enjoying the feel of his bare skin under her hands and against her face.

His hand started to creep up under her sweatshirt and caress the smooth skin across the small of her back. Her satiny skin burning beneath his touch when he dipped his mouth to kiss her lightly just below the ear and he heard her hiss with pleasure. His hot tongue darting out to tease her scalding flesh and trail kisses along the length of her jaw towards her mouth. She dipped her own chin and captured his lips with hers, kissing him softly and trailing her tongue along the length of his upper lip before letting it enter his sweet depths and greet his tongue with a growing passion.

Jack's hands urgently went to her waist and up her sides under the sweatshirt, his palms cupping the undersides of her naked breasts beneath as his thumbs rolled over her darkened peaks, hardening under his touch.

"I want you." He whispered against her mouth, seizing her lip with his and pulling back slowly.

"Then take me." She smiled back and forcefully kissed his mouth with her sweeping tongue and hunger for the man she loved, knowing it was going to be five long days and nights before she was with him again.

His hands found her zipper and pulled, opening her sweatshirt and exposing her beautiful treasures beneath to him with a smile. His eyes lit up in a smile as his mouth moved to the space between her breasts, laving and kissing at her soft flesh while he pulled the shirt free from her body and his hands slid up her back, pulling her closer and kissing her hot flesh between and around her breasts aggressively, making her arch backwards lifting her heaving breasts towards the ceiling like an offering to the Gods. His body kept them swaying to the music as his tongue swirled her erect peaks, nipping and dragging his teeth slowing over them making her moan and hiss in pleasure.

Slowly he pulled her back up to him as his mouth ventured north and glided along the curve of her neck and collarbone, his hands going to her waistband and pushing them down over her firm little ass with his fingers digging into her flesh as he went. Irina helped him by stepping on the pant legs pulling them all the way off and stepping out of them as her own hands worked to free him from the confines of his pants, repeating exactly what Jack had just done to her. His cock was already hard and pressing against his stomach when his pants joined hers on the floor and she stepped forward, grasping his length in her hand and his balls with the other, laughing softly when Jack inhaled sharply and clenched his stomach muscles when she began to stroke him slowly. Her thumb circling his head and spreading the drop of pre-cum his surprise had forced out. Her tongue delving into his mouth in time with her strokes against his shaft and Jack groaned loudly into her mouth feeling her tight fingers making him rock hard against her palm and her tongue thrusting into his mouth.

"God that feels good." Jack gasped and screwed his eyes shut when she pulled long and hard against his shaft, stepping closer and rubbing it against her own scorching flesh. His fingers worked down over her ass and to her front dipping into her drenched folds and teasing her already engorged clit with his thumb and forefinger making her gasp and moan with his, thrusting her hips onto his hand with involuntary movement and making Jack smile.

"So…you like…that." Jack plunged his finger inside of her lifting her to her toes with a sharp gasp of surprise making her eyes wide and smiling madly at her.

"Yeah… I like that." She flashed him her sexy smile, thrusting her own fingers up and into the skin behind his sack making him lift to his toes and gasp for breath when his cock twitched with the surge she pumped through his body with that single move.

Now the game was on…they both smiled at each other. Irina's body was dripping for him and he slowly slid another finger into her impossibly tight vagina.

"My God woman, you're getting tighter I swear." He moaned when she clenched his fingers hard inside of her and his cock simultaneously.

"Exercises, Sweetheart." She waggled her eyebrows and clenched him again with a smile.

His fingers stroked her internally while his mouth dipped to suck on her neck and his thumb pressed against her clit in hard circles, thrusting his cock into her hand and against her stomach. Irina was falling fast when his speed picked up and he found her G-spot, caressing it wildly as her body clenched around his fingers making her pant and moan, thrusting against his hand.

"Cum for me, Irina." He hissed against her neck, lapping softly at her pulse point as his fingers danced inside of her.

His words pulling her over the edge and she shattered around his fingers, soaking them with her own cum and squeezing him tightly inside and against his cock making him hiss out his breath as he continually stroked her and she threw her head back with a loud moan. He quickly swooped her over to the bed and lowered her onto it, kissing her body as he moved south with soft, wet kisses over her quivering flesh with a smile. He placed a long open mouthed kiss just below her belly button before he dropped to his knees by the side of the bed and grabbed her hips with his hands, pulling her close to the edge. His mouth, licked and bite the soft skin of her inner thighs, tasting the rivulets of her juices as he moved toward his destination with a big smile, intent on giving her maximum pleasure before she had to leave. His tongue dipped into her folds and Irina moaned loudly, gripping the bed sheets with her fists and screwing her eyes shut feeling his hot tongue against her radiating heat lapping at her juices and nipping her swollen bud with his teeth, pulling and teasing it into a frenzy. His fingers slid in slowly and began stroking upwards against her internal ridges of pleasure while his tongue continued to lap and suck, his teeth continued to tease hearing her rapid breath and the small sounds of escaping from the back of her throat as her orgasm built again.

Knowing she was close he moved his other hand slowly over her abdomen and pressed down against his assaulting fingers making Irina moan loudly and quiver just before she exploded and her body trembled again, sending another round of her scent down his fingers and he greedily lapped it up, loving the taste of her as he helped her ride out the waves of her orgasm by continuing to stroke and tease her.

"I love the way you taste." Jack climbed up over her smiling at her flushed face he dropped his mouth to hers, giving her a taste of her own scent as his tongue drove into her and swept with force through her mouth while his wet fingers stroked her nipples making her moan loudly against him she was on fire from him and for him and any touch was keeping her dangling on the edge.

He rolled her over quickly and leaned against her body, pressing hot kisses down he back, sweeping her hair out of the way while his hands massaged her tense muscles until they reached her hips. Propping himself up on his knees, he pulled gently against her hips and brought her to her knees in front of him. Her body ached for him to be inside of her and she begged for release.

"Deep Jack." She pleaded and his groin surged with her words as he looked over her beautiful back and ass.

His hand slid to his rock hard dick and caressed it a few times, as he brought it down between her legs, sliding it slowly at first into her hot soaking core and making her gasp into the bed where her face was hiding between her arms as her upper body rested on her forearms with her body bent up in the air for him.

The tip of his cock buried inside her hot tightness made Jack pant and when he thrust fast and deep lost his breath completely as they both moaned in ecstasy at his depth and the angle of his cock against her vaginal walls, rubbing directly over her inner bundles of exploding nerves.

"Oh God… you feel good." She moaned when he pulled out and plunged back in, stealing her breath, knowing she wouldn't last long with this angle.

"I think I'm in heaven." Jack panted and gasped feeling her clench around him so deeply his body was quivering buried inside her. His cock throbbed with its urgent need for release and he picked up his speed, pounding into her with a fluid force and Irina's hands formed tight white fists feeling him plunging into her deeply and filling her completely every thrust. Jack's ass was burning and his teeth clenched feeling his explosion starting to build deep inside and about to let go hearing Irina's chanting and soft screams of pleasure as he pushed her towards the edge with a deep thrust she screamed out his name and her body rocked violently against his shaft buried deep into her hot, tight core pulling him with her and erupted inside of her with such a force he felt a shot to his groin and screaming her name in turn at the immense pleasure their bodies together brought each other.

He pulled out quickly while he was still rocked hard and dripping his semen, rolled her over and plunged back in, determined to bring her back to her height before his member faded. She wrapped her trembling legs around his waist as he continued to pound into her dripping heat and making her pant all over again…

"Oh…God…Jack." She hissed as he pounded into her with his own quivering body, his mouth dipping to assault her breast with his tongue and then sucked, drawing out her milky sweetness and raking his teeth over her tender flesh making her fly over the edge one more time as her body shook and trembled violently against and around him, screaming and digging her nails into his back. Her climactic reaction fired through Jack's body and he exploded inside her once more feeling her muscles clenching and grabbing at him frantic with ecstasy.

Spent he collapsed on top of her with his sweat slicked body matted to hers, her heart pounding furiously inside her chest as it rose and rapidly fell again with her labored breaths that matched his own.

_***All I've Ever Needed***_

"Wow Jack…that was…wow." She smiled running her fingers through his hair as his exhausted member deflated inside her, caressed by her inner muscles.

"I was just thinking that." Jack smiled, kissing the breast right in front of him, turning to face her and pushed himself up onto shaky elbows so his weight wouldn't crush her.

"I." He kissed up her chest. "Love." His mouth reached her neck. "You." He smiled and his lips seized hers in a passionate kiss."God, I'm going to miss you." He rolled her over onto him, "My little security blanket." He smiled as his hand smoothed down her long hair over her back and kissed her head.

"I love you, too and believe me, I won't sleep at all while I am away. I'll have to resort to mediating again." She snuggled her head into the crook of her neck, as she laid sprawled over him. "I don't want to go." Just the thought of leaving him before she'd even gone was killing her. She felt like she couldn't breath when he wasn't with her.

"I know…and I don't want you to but it sounds like you have to. Soon, this will all be over and I promise you, we'll never have to spend a night apart for the rest of our lives." Jack spoke softly, wrapping his hands around her body and kissing her head again.

Irina lifted her head and her dark sated eyes found his, staring into them for a moment before breaking into a small smile, her lips descending onto his. Her tongue sweeping into his hot mouth and memorizing every single detail she already knew by heart. Her face resting against his when they came up for air, her eyes closed and she groaned having to pull away to get ready to leave.

She pulled off and away from him, sliding off the edge of the bed, she checked on Lena sleeping peacefully in her basket and Jack jumped out of bed, pulling her hard against his chest with her back to him, his arms wrapped securely around her burying his face into her hair.

"I'm not letting you leave."

"Jack…" She sighed, not wanting to leave either and feeling tears forming at the thought while she wrapped her arms around his.

"No, I'm not letting you leave right now you can leave in the morning but tonight, I want you in my arms, sleeping beside me." His warm breath tickled her ear as he backed them towards the bed, the room smelling of their sweaty ambitions and scent.

"Ok." Irina smiled and felt him smile into her hair. "I guess there are perks to being the future Tsar. I can push back the meeting." She giggled and he turned her rapidly in his arms…kissing her soundly.

"First, you need to drink this." Jack reached over to the nightstand and found the bottle of juice she had planned on taking to the plane, he handed it to her with a smile. "All those 'O's undoubtedly dropped your blood sugar." He smiled smugly, and peppered her face with his kisses laughing, when she gave him 'the look.'

"We could make it five…or six." Irina challenged him taking a swig of her juice and Jack shot her a look of disbelief, his body was exhausted and hers' had to be as couldn't take it and burst out laughing, almost spitting her juice out. "Jack, I was kidding. I'll end up in a coma if we continue at that pace all night!"

"Oh good…because I'd hate to disappoint you." He smiled and flopped back onto the bed with a big sigh.

"You never disappoint, My Love." Irina smiled warmly, setting her juice on the nightstand and hitting the lights. She crawled into bed next to him and snuggled against his body as he pulled the sheets and blanket around them.

"I am going to miss you." He turned his face after a moment, his eyes adjusting to the darkness and found her face outlined by the light of the moon he caressed it softly, kissing her lightly.

"Not as much as I'm going to miss you." She smiled against his mouth and kissed him soundly.

"Da Svidanya, Sweetheart." She snuggled against him and closed her eyes.

"Da svidanya, My Love." He kissed her forehead and closed his eyes as well, both falling asleep within minutes.

Jack felt the warm early morning sunlight against his skin and slowly opened his eyes to greet the day. His eyes smiled as he dug his face deeper into the pillow and cherished one of the few moments when he actually awoke before Irina.

She looked so beautiful in her sleep, at ease with no lines of stress interrupting her gorgeous features, her breathing even and shallow; her long lashes lying softly against her cheeks. She was lying on her side, facing him with one arm under her pillow and the other, softly under her cheek palm down in complete relaxation.

The sunlight streaming through the window caught her wedding rings, casting beams of sparkling light out from the diamonds. The white bed sheet was pulled up just over her slender hips and the natural curve of her body fell to open exposed flesh up the remainder of her body. Her Chestnut hair highlighted by the sun creating amber waves, cascading over her shoulder and disappearing from his sight behind her back. She was amazing…and he couldn't stop the smile from coming to his face as he lay quietly, watching her sleep looking like a Greek Goddess. He would never stop thanking God for bringing her back to him.

Slowly, her eyes fluttered open and a smile came to her lips when she saw him smiling at her, wide-awake.

"Good morning beautiful." He leaned in and placed a soft kiss against her lips, smiling.

"Good morning." She whispered with a smile in her deep voice, still heavy from sleep and making her accent thick. She moved her hand to place gently over his cheek, leaning in for another soft kiss before rolling onto her stomach and plunging the other arm under her pillow, propping her head up, with her head turned towards him smiling.

Jack reached his hand out and lazily traced his fingers down the length of her back, brushing aside her hair and enjoying the smoothness of her skin. When they dipped down her side she pulled away quickly with a laugh.

"Jack…that tickles."

"Ooooh…" He smiled with a deviant look in his eyes and attacked her, throwing her into a fit of giggles as she wiggled and squirmed to get away from him, begging him to stop. He flipped her over and straddled her body with his own laughing at how insanely ticklish she was and the torment he was putting her through.

"Jack, please!" She begged squirming beneath his touch.

"Do you surrender?" He paused, holding her arms to the bed hovering over her with a smile.

"Yes…now please stop." She agreed readily with a smile having her own plan of attack ready.

"Seal it with a kiss." He waited for her nod and descended his lips onto hers. It quickly became passionate and Jack lost himself in the depths of her mouth.

Irina waited for him to loose the tension and pushed him off, rolling over and pinning him to the bed.

"Ah ha! You should know, I never surrender! I just wait for my moment of attack!" She laughed triumphantly sitting atop him and Jack had to laugh. "What, what is that look?" She asked staring down at him when he kept smiling with a funny curiosity.

"I was just thinking how adorable you are." He smiled and her eyes went wide with surprise and then deep laughter.

"Jack, I am not adorable! Our baby is adorable. I am many things, but _never_ adorable! _Never._" She pounded her fist lightly onto his peck like a hammer with determined eyes and a hidden smile.

"Oh yes you are." He kept smiling, seeing this word drove her nuts when used in reference to herself, "Right now and when I was tickling you…you just look adorable."

"Stop it." She scorned even as her laughter bubbled out.

"Why? You don't want word to get out and ruin your tough-guy image if people knew that the 'the Man' is super ticklish and absolutely adorable when I do this!"

He attacked her sides again and sent her squirming with giggles.

"You're adorable! See…" He tickled smiling, "Right now…your giggles and smile are adorable! Adorable!"

"Jack!" She finally grasped his wrists away from her body and pinned them down again, breathing heavily over him with her face inches above his. Her eyes pinned to his a smile spread across her face as she dipped her head and kissed him softly. "If you were anyone else, I would have shot you for that!" She smirked teasing him and making him erupt in another bout of laughter.

They both laughed and Irina leaned forward again, whispering into his face with a soft smile.

"I love you Jack…" She was thankful for this morning and every other morning she woke with him beside her.

"And I love you, my crazy beautiful wife." He replied in Russian with his smile meeting his eyes. "What are you thinking about?" He reached up and put her long hair behind one ear, seeing a sudden flash of sadness race through her eyes.

"A year ago today…and how far apart we were. It was a year ago today that Emily died." She answered in a soft whisper thinking about that horrible day in Tuscany and her standoff with Sydney that ended with her being shot and Emily being killed.

"I know." Jack said softly, reaching up to touch her face lightly, "We've come along way from then to now." He smiled softly, "And I will thank God for everyday I wake with you beside me; I never want to be without you again."

"I was just thinking the same thing." Her smile reached her eyes and he pulled her towards him for another kiss. "I'm never letting you go again."

"Don't go, Irina. Stay here with me." He held her tightly brushing his hand over her hair as she lay with her head to his chest on top of him. He couldn't explain the anxiety he felt about her leaving, but he didn't want to let her out of his arms; five days was agony without her.

"Jack, I have to go." She sighed and snuggled her cheek against his skin, kissing him lightly on the chest. She really didn't want to leave him either. "Why don't you come with me?" She asked already knowing the answer.

"I can't." He fingered her soft tresses with a soft sigh of his own, "If you're taking care of business, then I need to stay and keep looking for Cuvee. We both can't leave."

She remained quiet as her mind drifted to unwanted thoughts that name always brought to her and Jack realized where her mind had wondered when he felt the slight tremble run through her.

"I'm sorry for bringing his name up." He ran his hand softly down her head and back, kissing her head. "I promise to never say his name in our bed again."

"It's ok, Jack. I just can't wait for this all to be over." She turned her head so that her chin was propped against his chest, looking him in the eye. "I have to get going. " She smiled sadly, pressing her lips to his chest once more before rolling off of him and out of bed.

* * *

"You have everything?" Jack smiled sadly handing Irina the baby bag as he waited with Lena on their front porch, the limo taking her to the airport in their driveway.

"Yes." She smiled clasping his hand and laughed softly looking down at Lena who was smiling in her sleep. "She is so cute and I'm not just saying that because I'm her mother." Irina laughed softly looking at her sweet baby looking absolutely adorable in her little sundress sleeping.

"No, I agree, Your Highness. She _is_ so cute." Yuriy smiled broadly standing behind them looking down at the tiny Duchess.

"Thank you, Yuriy." Irina smiled and laughed softly.

"I thought so too, that's why I took her picture." Jack smiled holding up their small digital camera. "I have to have a recent one if she's going to be gone for the next five days."

Irina shook her head smiling at Jack and his camera as he picked up Lena and they all walked towards the waiting car. He snapped the seat into the base and clasped the straps around his little angel.

"I'll see you in a few days baby girl." He dropped a series of soft kisses to her head and hands. "Take care of your Mommy." He turned to face Irina as Yuriy climbed into the car on the other side. "Be safe, be careful and return to me quickly." He kissed her face and then her mouth, "I love you, Irina." He held her beautiful face in his hands.

"I will do my best to all of the above and I love you, too." She closed her eyes, inhaling his scent when he brought her softly to his chest to hug her. "I'll see you in five days."

"Call me when you get to your apartment, please? Let me know my girls got there safely." He held the door open for her and gave her his hand as she climbed in.

"I promise, I'll see you later, Sweetheart." She kissed his lips once more quickly before settling into her seat in the dark limo next to Lena's car seat.

"Yuriy." Jack looked into the dark space with a smile, "Take care of my girls."

"I will." The tall Russian smiled and Jack nodded shutting the door and watching as the car backed out and turned down the street out of sight. He was walking up the steps to the house when his cell phone rang. It was Irina and Jack opened it smiling.

"Miss me already?" He answered and heard her laugh softly.

"Of course but I almost forgot to tell you…the little box delivered to me last night…was from Marshall. It is the security tape of Panama Jack wrangling that Wild Siberian tiger in her old cage," She spoke lowly trying not to laugh even though Yuriy had no idea what she was talking about. "I wanted it to burn it myself but if you miss me that much while I'm gone, you may want to take a look at it." She laughed softly with a big smile hearing him swallow hard on the other side of the phone.

"Oh sure make me watch when I can't have you after!" Jack laughed, stepping inside the house, "No, that's definitely something we'll have to watch together. At least once, before we burn it. See what the _kiddies_ saw." He laughed and picked up the package off his desk. "Damn! Now you really have to hurry up and get back here. I'm getting aroused by just the memory of you against the glass!" His smiled widened hearing her laughter on the other end.

"I love you." She sighed into the phone, missing him terribly already.

"I miss you too, my feisty Siberian Tiger." He sighed, missing her so much already it hurt as he looked over to the new framed photo of his gorgeous bride on their wedding day just a few weeks ago. "I love you. I'll talk to you later."

"Later…bye." She clicked her phone shut and sighed, leaning back against her seat with her eyes closed. This is going to be a long and torturous five days.

* * *

Jack had gone over files all day and Sark had helped him poor over many documents before they went out to dinner and met with Sydney and Vaughn. Jack had recanted stories to them all from the night before and about life with Irina when she was 'Laura.'

It was late when they finally got home and both of them went straight to bed. Jack knew it was futile to try and get any sleep without his security blanket next to him. The bed just seemed to big and empty without her. She should be calling at anytime to say that they'd landed and were now settled into her apartment overlooking the Red Square. He flopped from side to side, trying to get comfortable and dug his face into her pillow, inhaling her scent with his eyes closed and finally fell asleep.

Two hours later his cell phone began ringing and Jack groggily awoke from his sleep, rubbed his eyes and reached for his phone with a smile. The clock said 2:30am and she was late. He flipped open the phone without even looking and closed his eyes against the brilliant blue light of the screen.

"Good afternoon." He smiled with his eyes closed, laying against his pillow knowing it would be that time of day in Russia now.

"Jack," Vladimir's cracked voice came over the other end of the phone and Jack bolted upright in bed, eyes wide.

"Vladimir." Jack's heart immediately began to pound knowing this man wouldn't be calling him unless something happened to Irina. "What happened? Where's Irina?"

"Her security was ambushed on the way from the airport." Vladimir sighed into the phone, obviously upset. "When our agents got to the scene, all of her guards were dead. The cars were both shot out. Yuriy…is dead." Vladimir choked on his words, having known the man for a long time and a good friend to both he and Irina.

"And Irina and Lena?" Jack's heart pounded in his ears as he sprang out of bed, and rapidly flew around in the darkness searching for his clothes.

"Jack, they're gone. Both of them were taken." Vladimir was a mix of rage and fear. "I don't know if they're hurt or not but-"

"But what?" Jack practically screamed into the phone dancing around trying to hold the phone and get into his pants at the same time as his hands trembled.

"Irina's side of the car…there is a lot of blood. My team is testing it now to see if it matches her DNA…or Lena's."


	51. Chapter 51

**_AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Here With Me- Dido, A Small Measure of Peace by Hans Zimmer the Last Samurai Soundtrack, Malleus Maleficarum by Hans Zimmer from The Da Vinci Code Soundtrack._**

* * *

FIFTY-ONE

o

"Sonofabitch!" Jack screamed and clenched his trembling fingers into fists, "I knew this was going to happen! I knew it! I had a bad feeling about her leaving this morning! Goddamnit! Why didn't I listen to myself!?" He ranted to himself and Vladimir felt helpless on the other side of the phone. "How the hell could this happen? I thought she was supposed to be in an armored limo with four security cars around her?" He rapidly flung clothes out of his drawer searing for a shirt.

"She was, Jack. Nineteen members of the twenty member detail were all killed…one, is missing as well, and we can only assume at this point that the guard missing was working for whomever ambushed them. He had to have been, for shots to be fired inside her armored limo and kill Yuriy and the driver." Vladimir was growing angrier by the second thinking about one of his own countrymen turning on their Tsar, undoubtedly for money. "We have no idea who took her…no demands have been made which is usual when a high ranking political official is abducted…which to me suggests-"

"She wasn't abducted for ransom, but revenge." He gulped knowing of one man who would go to such great lengths to get to Irina...

"Yes." Vladimir sighed quietly.

"I'm on my way." Jack fumed as he threw on his socks and shoes. He stormed down the hallway and threw open Sark's door, blasting the light on and making the young man bolt upright in bed.

Sark didn't need to hear the words to know something had happened to Irina by the look on Jack's face.

"Cuvee ambushed Irina's team on the way from the airport in Moscow. Irina and Lena are both missing, everyone else is dead. We're going to Moscow." Jack gulped and Sark flew out of bed instantly, wearing only his boxers and started searching for some clothing immediately, feeling the panic rise in him at the thought of Irina alone with Cuvee after what he'd seen on the tapes and the baby!

_'Oh God the baby!'_ He swallowed hard trying not to think of the fact that she was with Cuvee as well.

Jack bounded down the steps with great speed and flew into his office, throwing the files on Cuvee he'd been looking at into his briefcase and removed his guns from the bottom of his false bottom drawer, placing them inside as well. He paused when his eyes caught Irina's smiling face in the photo from their wedding day and his heart felt like shattering as his mind filled with her screams for help from the Kashmir tapes and what Cuvee was doing to her. He grasped the picture and put it into his briefcase along with the one of her and Lena with the baby sleeping on her chest. He latched it closed and met Sark at the door.

Within minutes they were flying down the freeway towards Sydney and Vaughn's with Jack on the phone relaying to Kendall what had happened and setting up a plane from Van Nuys to take them to Moscow tonight.

Jack stood stone still as he rapt on the door and rang the doorbell repeatedly in the middle of the night on his daughter's doorstep.

Vaughn sleepily answered the door wearing only boxers with messy hair and groggy eyes that went wide seeing Jack dressed at his doorstep and looking deadly serious at an ungodly hour of the morning. He didn't have time to ask before Sydney came up right behind him with wide panicked eyes.

"Dad? What happened?" She gulped as tears were already forming in her eyes seeing her father's face and Sark in the car waiting.

"Cuvee ambushed your mother's security detail. All of the security personal were killed including Yuriy. Your mother and sister are missing." He said rapidly and softly, his heart breaking all over watching the tears flood his daughters' eyes. "We're leaving for Moscow, now."

"Oh God," Sydney flew back to her bedroom with Vaughn on her heels as Jack waited for them in the dark entryway. She was sobbing as she tried to put her clothes on and Vaughn struggled to keep it together himself seeing her so distraught.

"It's going to be ok, Sydney. We're going to find them." He tried to reassure her as he pulled on his shirt.

"Vaughn, you saw what he did to her!" She sobbed loudly and struggled to breath as she pulled on her pants and whirled to get her shirt. "And now he has both of them."

"Syd, we're going to find them!" He said more soundly and grabbed her upper arms, forcing her to look at him.

"Vaughn, you weren't there! In Moscow when Cuvee and Sloane kidnapped me for bait. You didn't hear what he said to her! What he told her he would do to her once he had her again…" She sobbed and her face contorted in pain and her breath caught.

"Don't think about that." He pulled her to him, his own breath coming in short spurts trying not to think of it himself, "We'll find her before the bastard can lay a finger on her, all right? Now let's go." He kissed her softly and intensely, grabbing her hand and pulling her out of the bedroom. "We're ready." Vaughn squeezed Sydney's hand and followed Jack to the car.

The trip was made in silence as everyone was lost in their own thoughts and all were surprised when they arrived to find Kendall and Weiss standing at the plane.

"I just wanted to make sure you had everything you need before you left, Jack." Kendall looked absolutely ashen with hands on hips and finding it hard to swallow. "If you need anything, we're here. We'll help in anyway we can." His own mind flashing to the horror of the Kashmir tapes and to the recent reveal of Irina's many pregnancies by rape and forced miscarriages from the man who had her captive now…

"I'm coming with you." Weiss said resolutely with unshed tears in his eyes, scared for Irina and his God Baby.

Jack nodded at him, sharing his pain but not allowing anyone to see it.

"Jack, Putin's agents just called our office." Kendall shifted uncomfortably as everyone paid close attention to him, "The blood they found inside the car on Irina's side matched her DNA…and Lena's."

"Oh my God…" Sydney gasped covering her mouth as tears sprang forward and Jack swallowed hard as the pain and rage swirled inside of him.

"How much blood?" Jack asked quietly, trying to assess possible injury to both of them.

"More of Irina's then Lena's." Kendall answered just as quietly, severely disturbed by the thought of a baby's blood being spilt. "Lena was taken from her car seat. They found a small amount of her blood on the strap, some glass shards in her seat from a drinking glass and on her yellow bear." He gulped having been the one to give her the bear when she was born…a bear he never saw her without these last few weeks. His eyes forcing back tears when he saw a fresh wave of tears in Sydney's eyes. "Irina's blood was on the window, head rest and on the sides and top of Lena's car seat. The Russian agents concluded that she was probably leaning over Lena trying to shield her from whatever chaos was happening around them." His heart felt heavy and saddened at the mental picture that gave him and everyone else; an injured Irina, bleeding and leaning over her baby trying to protect her. "They think its from a head wound. Irina's head hit the side window as the cars spun out and collided, which would explain why there is so much blood with a face or head wound. They don't think she's been shot, Jack." He watched as the pain and worry raced across Jack's face with rapid torment.

"We'll call you when we land." Jack nodded and flew up the steps of the plane, followed by everyone else and Kendall stood and watched until the plane was in the air.

"Oh, Dear God, please let them find her in time." He looked skyward with a big sigh before jumping into his car and heading back to Ops.

"Dad?" Sydney sniffled with puffy red eyes as she came to sit beside him hours later on the flight, her father had been staring at the picture of her mother and sister for the last two hours. She didn't know what to say or what to do, so she just wrapped her arms around him and cried.

Jack was tense at first from keeping his emotions under lock and key but feeling Sydney melt in his arms and her warm tears against his cheek and neck he slowly wrapped his arms around her as well letting his own tears well but forced them back vehemently. He had to be strong for all of his girls. There was no time for him to cry or get upset, not when two of them were out their in the hands of a mad man.

"Dad, I am scared for her. For both of them," Sydney sobbed into him softly, "Why would he take Lena, too? Why would he want a little baby?" She knew why, her brother came to mind and she cried harder trying to push those thoughts out of her mind. "He's going to use her against Mom." She sobbed and shook in his arms and Jack closed his eyes fight for control over his emotions as he held her, knowing she was right.

* * *

Sometime later he looked over to where Sydney had fallen asleep with her head on Vaughn's lap as he stroked her hair, the picture of Irina from their wedding day looking absolutely gorgeous was clutched tightly to his daughter's chest. His eyes looked up and met Vaughn's sympathetic gaze for a moment before looking away.

* * *

_***Here With Me***_

When they landed in Moscow they went straight to the scene of the crime, which was blocked off and off the beaten path enough that the abduction hadn't been publicized, which was a good thing and working in their favor at the moment.

Jack felt like vomiting when they approached the mangled cars with blood pools around them and white chalk outlines from where the guards bodies had laid before being removed. Police, SVR and FSB agents were all present, taking pictures and measuring out the crime scene.

The limo carrying his wife and child lay crushed against the side of one of the guard's cars when it had been rammed and slammed into the side where Irina was sitting. The interior glass had been cracked from where her head had hit, that was plain to see and her bloodstains were now drying down the window and over the headrest.

Jack knelt down and about lost it when he saw Lena's car seat with Irina's blood covering it, the tiny strap with his baby's blood and her little yellow teddy bear with blood sprays on it. Carefully, he removed the soft bear and held it in his hands knowing they had what they needed and he already knew who took his wife and baby. Slowly he stood with the tiny bear clutched in his hands and walked towards Sydney, Sark, Vaughn and Weiss who were talking with the Russian Agents.

Sydney saw the tiny bear in her father's hand and tears instantly came to her eyes once more seeing her sister's blood on the tiny plush object that had kept her company in her dreams.

"What have we got?" Jack asked the lead detective in Russian.

"There were apparently a pair of witnesses who saw something that we are currently trying to track down. A couple of homeless teenagers were heard talking about fantastic car crash and then killing and abduction a few blocks away. They apparently thought it was a mafia hit and are now in hiding thinking they will be killed as witnesses." The Russian guard inhaled on his cigarette with his eyes burning as he looked over his notes.

"Where are you looking for them?" Jack was losing his patience out of his own fear and worry.

"I understand your desperation, Agent Bristow, we love her, too." The agent blew out his smoke and spoke softly of his Tsar, "We're trying as hard as we can to get anything on the Empress's whereabouts and those kids but you've got to understand, Moscow is a big place and if those kids are terrified for their lives. They know where to hide and not be found. It's going to take awhile to find them. I'm sorry."

"She doesn't have 'awhile,' Agent Andrekov!" Jack fumed quietly with tight lips squeezing the bear. "Find them!" He stormed off and the other's followed.

"Now what do we do, Dad?" Sydney asked when they climbed into the car.

"We start looking for Cuvee on our own." Jack turned his head towards the window staring at Moscow and then to the bear in his hands. He wouldn't stop looking for her; he wouldn't sleep until he found them.

* * *

_***A Small Measure of Peace***_

Irina's head felt heavy and her eyelids like giant weights. The metallic sting of blood bit at her tongue and she felt its warm stickiness against her eye and down her face but she couldn't open her eyes. Her body ached and felt like dead weight and she was lying on a hard, cold floor with her hands chained together. In the distance, through the fog in her mind she could hear her baby crying and wondered if she was only dreaming it or if it really was Lena. The crying became louder and she struggled to make her eyes open as her head pounded furiously.

"Wake up, my Little Minx!" She heard Cuvee's voice pierce through her thoughts and Lena screaming nearby. Cuvee saw her eyes fluttering and smiled, leaning over and yanking hard on her hair and arm until she as in sitting position, pushing her back against the wall she was chained to and he slapped her hard. "Wake up!"

The concussion she suffered in the accident had knocked her out for hours. Irina, though, really had no idea how long she was out and his hand connecting with her face sent a tsunami of pain straight through her head.

"Wake up!" He screamed at her again, shaking her, "That bump to your head really knocked you out." He laughed when her eyes finally opened into slits and then wider, the blood streaming into her left eye causing it to stick shut and Cuvee reached up and wiped it with his hand gently, looking into her eyes with a smile. "It's good to see you again, Irina." He smiled at her, cupping her face and Irina tried to turn out of his grasp, her senses coming around again and she realized, she was in some serious trouble.

Her ears picked up the screams of Lena again and her eyes darted around the room for her baby, hearing in her voice that she was almost hoarse from crying for so long, so hard, and Irina's panic took over.

"Ah, I see you're looking for your little bastard." He smiled widely as his hand brushed up her thigh exposed by her dress and then over the swells of her chest. "She's been screaming for these gorgeous beauties for hours now. Not that I can blame her. They are fantastic to suck on."

Irina cringed at the memory she was assaulted with.

"Where is she?" She finally croaked out and squinted trying to focus, still finding it difficult with her vision faulty.

Cuvee stood and walked to a big steel door and opened it, turning around the corner he leaned over and scooped the baby into his arms. Her body and head red with rage and her screams reduced to hoarse gasps, as she lay stiff in his arms from exhaustion and hunger.

"Shhhhh. There, there now, little Bastard Duchess." He cradled the baby in his arms as he walked towards Irina, kissing her little cheek with a sick gleam in his eyes. "I know you must be hungry by now…starving really."

Irina wanted to scream out and beg him but she knew that's what he wanted from her and it would only make it worse. She tried to focus on her baby and saw the blood on her little face and arms.

"What did you do to her?" Irina seethed with anger, her voice a mere growl.

"I didn't do anything to your 'precious little seed of Satan,' Irina." Cuvee walked towards her and knelt down in front of her, "She was cut by a glass in your bodyguard's hand when the shots rang out. Just a few minor cuts. So, do you want to feed the screaming bastard or not?" He smiled seductively at Irina's breasts and intentionally kept calling Lena a bastard, just as he had with Sydney twenty years ago.

"You're actually going to let me feed her?" Irina looked at him with disbelief, knowing there was more to this then he was saying.

"Of course, I'm not the monster you think I am. She is quite beautiful for a bastard spawn. So much like her mother I see." His fingers trailed down Lena's face and arms as the baby trembled beneath his touch, having cried none stop for hours now. "But, I'm also not stupid and your chains stay on. So, I suppose you'll need help pulling that dress down and exposing your ravishing breasts?" His sick smile widened as he set Lena on the side of the bed and moved his finger's over Irina's chest, moving over her shoulders and dropping the straps before pulling it down and exposing her fully; his eyes lit up and Irina felt the bile rising in her throat as he caressed and kissed her body.

She wanted to head-butt him, bite him…anything to get him to stop but she knew if she did, her baby would suffer. His tongue darted out and flicked her nipple while his hand fondled the other one, grasping and cupping at their full weight with heated breath and a small laugh of enjoyment.

"If I had known your breasts would be so enormous and fantastic after having a baby, I might have considered letting you carrying one to full term. Just so I could enjoy these beautiful things." He groaned and covered her nipple with his entire mouth as Lena continued to scream beside Irina on the bed while he fondled her mother. His teeth grated over her and felt like acid burning her flesh she was so reviled and screwed her eyes shut trying to block it out when his tongue flicked at her peak and sucked lightly, making it erect and producing milk in stimuli for her baby.

"Mmm." He licked his lips, enjoying her sweetness. "I always wondered what you would taste like. " He moved his mouth to kiss the other and then between her breasts up her scar line and over the puckered flesh from his bullet wound. "So, I see I've left another mark on your gorgeous body." He smiled pleased as Irina turned her head violently to the side and away from him. "You left quite the mark on mine too, you Little Minx." He rocked back on his heels and touched the scar across his neck. "Our games are always so dramatic, so fun. I promise you, Irina, this will be the best game of all." His sick and twisted smiled unnerved her as he placed the baby in her chained arms.

"It's ok, shh, shh, shh." Irina spoke softly to her daughter, trying to comfort her but not give too much away for him to use against her later.

Lena was so exhausted and traumatized she had no strength to stop crying or turn her head or realize she was in her mother's arms and with Irina's arms chained together, she couldn't help her.

"I think she needs some guidance." Cuvee's smile radiated vile disgust and yet sexual rapture when he cupped Irina's breast and turned the baby's face into it, watching with ill pleasure as she slowly began to latch on and suck with her little quivering hand palming her mother's breast. "Well, isn't that just a lovely sight... the whore feeding the bastard." He sat back and watched, getting off on the image and feeling himself growing hard beneath his pants. Slowly he began to stroke himself and Irina knew what he was doing but focused solely on Lena inspecting her body for any other damage.

The cuts on her little head, face and arm were bad enough but the sheer exhaustion in her eyes and how weak and limp she felt in Irina's arms was almost her undoing. Her little dark eyes, filled with tears, were staring into Irina's with such a sad haunted look that it tore Irina to pieces…a look that asked, _'Why didn't you come for me…why didn't you feed me and keep me safe…I was scared…and you let me cry, why?'_

Cuvee unzipped his pants and started yanking on his cock, grunting with his eyes locked onto Irina's chest and the baby sucking at her breast. When he finally came he groaned,_ 'Oh fuck, Irina'_ and laughed when she refused to look at him.

"Is that what you're beloved Jack does? Beat off to the sight of you feeding his spawn?" He laughed, shoving his deflating dick back into his pants, "Or does he just fuck you at the same time?"

Irina took a deep breath, keeping her rage in check and her mouth quiet, thankful when one of his men interrupted them. They whispered in the corner while the man, Irina now recognized from her Security Detail, stared wide-eyed at her exposed chest while she fed the baby. He quickly looked away when she caught his eyes and Cuvee lit a cigarette, nodding along to whatever the man was saying. Irina couldn't see well enough yet with the blood matting her swollen eye and lashes shut to read their lips. Her concussion making it hard to focus her vision.

The guard suddenly left and Cuvee turned back to Irina with a lechorous smile, inhaling deeply as he leaned against the far wall watching her.

"You know," He exhaled dramatically, "I could never really picture you as a mother until just now. Quite fascinating really." He smiled with an evil gleam, knowing he had her just where he wanted her, had her weakness at his disposal, and for now he would play.

His hand reached into his jacket pocket and retrieved a rolled magazine, walking slowly towards her against the wall with his cigarette dangling between his lips.

"I remember your pleas for your other daughter in Kashmir. But we broke you of that concern for twenty years, and then what? You saw her again and suddenly felt like you were a mother again?" His eyes narrowed at her, though his lips carried a hidden smile, "You threw everything away for the bastard American child you left behind. I don't know how you've managed to fool the world, Irina, but I see through you. You aren't a woman of strength, but one ruled by her weaknesses, and I know what they are." He reached his hand out to graze against her cheek and she turned away quickly, making him laugh. "Sydney always worked so well against you in the past." He held up the magazine smiling as his fingers traced the suggestive outlines of Sydney' thigh, arm and chest in the Russian magazine's engagement announcement and Irina's eyes went wide, her heart pounding.

"I have to take care of something. " He stubbed out his cigarette on Sydney's chest in the photo gracing its cover…throwing it down at Irina, "And then I'll be back," He moved towards the door. "To play." His leer cast over her body once more before he left the room.

"Oh baby, I'm sorry." Irina leaned her head way down to rest her cheek against her ravenous shaking child who was so hungry and weak she was barely moving, trying desperately to keep her tears from falling thinking about how much danger both of her girls were in. "I'll get us out of this somehow. Daddy will find us. I know he's probably looking for us now."

_'Dear God Jack, please keep Sydney by your side._' She looked heavenward as her tears fell silently down her cheeks.

* * *

_***Moscow Wind Up***_

Sydney sighed, frustrated and exhausted going over every file in front of her for the tenth time in the last few hours.

They were currently sitting in the middle of a conference room in the SVR Headquarters, both governments agencies having thrown secrecy and politics aside to work together and bring Irina and the baby back as fast as possible.

Vladimir's knowledge from, and inner knowledge of the KGB was proving very helpful in opening doors that would otherwise have been slammed shut to any agents of the CIA, regardless it they were about to become the Imperial family or not…as long as they were still CIA, many things were still off limits. Vladimir had called in some of his old KGB comrades to help in the search, having intimate knowledge of Gerard Cuvee and possible places he might have taken them.

Sydney had called Katya and broke the terrible news earlier in the day and now she was on a flight from Rome; expected to arrive in Moscow within the hour.

They had just finished scanning the most recent photos of Irina, her wedding photo Jack had brought, and of Lena, the picture he took before they left yesterday morning, and sending them out to all police stations throughout Russia, the former Soviet Republics and even Europe…knowing that Cuvee could take them anywhere.

With her back aching and muscles tense, Sydney leaned forward, closed her eyes and massaged her temples trying not to think at all for a moment and clear her head. Her cell phone started ringing and Sydney reached for it instantly, thinking it was Katya announcing she'd landed.

"Hello?" She answered softly, standing up and moving out of the conference room for privacy.

"Agent Sydney Bristow?" The voice on the other end of the phone was a male she didn't recognize and he spoke with heavily accented English.

"Yes." Sydney's heart began beating rapidly.

"I have information on the whereabouts of your mother. Do exactly as I say or I'll hang up and you'll never find her." The man answered in perfectly stern English and Sydney looked around with eyes wide, trying to locate her father, knowing she had to tell him but afraid if she did, they would lose a potential lead on her mother whom she was desperate to find. "Do not look at anyone or speak to anyone. Walk out of the building, now." The voice commanded and Sydney did as told trying to swallow the lump in her throat. When she pushed through the doors she was greeted with the cold Russian night.

"Now what?" Sydney asked agitated but keeping her cool as she looked around for anyone who could be the caller.

"Walk to the end of the block and get into the black Mercedes on the corner." His voice hissed out and she could tell the man was smoking on the other end. She did as told and looked around cautiously before trying the door handle, surprised to find it unlocked and keys inside. "Drive through the intersection and keep heading east." The deep voice commanded again and Sydney followed his instructions, her heart thundering in her ears.

"Where did Sydney go?" Vaughn entered the conference room with two cups of coffee, looking to Weiss then Jack.

"I don't know; I haven't seen her but her stuff is still here." Weiss looked over to the stack of files and Sydney's bag in the chair.

"How do I know, you even know where my mother is?" Sydney's anger started to get the best of her as she drove into the depths of the city.

"Go take the baby from her. Leave the little bastard along the far wall out of her reach." Cuvee sneered at one his men over his shoulder, nodding in the direction of the door behind him.

"Excuse me, don't mean to interrupt but I saw the Grand Duchess on the phone talking with someone outside and getting into a car while I was on my way in." A young female agent gave them a small smile.

"You don't, Agent Bristow. But I am your only lead, take a right onto the industrial highway." He suddenly gave her the direction just as the car neared the on ramp access. Sydney fumed but did as she was told and drove on for a few miles. "Take the Leningrad exit and turn left."

Irina had just shifted Lena to the other side when a burly looking guard stormed through the door and Irina tried to hold the baby closer seeing his eyes on her child.

"A car? She got into a car?" Jack immediately stood, leaning over the table as his blood roared in his ears.

"Easy or hard?" The man looked down at Irina and the baby with his hand on his gun, speaking in a warning tone of what would happen if she didn't relinquish her baby.

"Yes, a black Mercedes on the corner." The woman nodded and the three men shared a look, jumping into action.

Sydney maneuvered the car through the nighttime traffic and pulled off where the stranger had said to.

"Now continue on the path crossing the railroad tracks. Park the car behind the yellow train car and walk north until you reach the old fabric factory."

Sydney saw the yellow train car and did as she was told while her stomach flooded with unease and nausea.

"Vaughn, get them to pull the security tapes and see if they can't pull up that license plate number!" Jack tried to keep his panic down. He could not let Cuvee get his hands on all three of them. "Weiss start talking to possible witnesses and I'll call Marshall and see if we can't get a read on her signal, find out where she's going?"

Irina drew in a deep shaking breath knowing she had no choice but to let the baby go for now or witness her child's execution. She let the man take Lena, watching him grab her roughly and walk to the other side of the room, leaving her in the corner on the cold cement floor as her baby began to scream again and Irina's eyes went wide, watching the man retreat quickly across the dingy room and close the door behind him.

The floor was freezing and rough, only making Lena's cries that much worse as her little body shivered and Irina's heart was breaking, pulling as hard as she could against the restraints but unable to reach her.

_'This was his point.'_ Irina cried feeling her tears stinging and beginning to slide down her cheeks at being so close to her baby and unable to help her.

Sydney's eyes fell upon the enormous warehouse and factory before her that looked like it had been abandoned long ago and was barely visible in the dark of night without any working perimeter lights.

"Climb the east fence."

She turned walking through a small field of tall grass of overgrowth and spotted the rusty chain link fence. She slipped the phone into her pocket and scaled the fence, landing with a soft thumb onto her feet on the other side. She knew she was walking into a trap…but she wasn't about to let her Mom go through this alone either. She only hoped her father or Vaughn had caught on to her disappearance and were already looking for her.

"Damn it, Sydney!" He hissed under his breath in frustration and worry, knowing his daughter too well when he watched the video feed of her receiving the phone call, her obvious nervousness and hesitation before she walked outside, paused and then headed towards the car that was waiting.

"It's ok Lena, Mama's here! I'm not leaving you!" Irina called out to her baby trying to give her some comfort and Lena turned her head towards the sound of her mother's voice, her big dark eyes filled with tears as the sight of Irina only made her more upset in that she was staring at her mother and she wasn't helping her. Irina's chest felt like it was about to explode with the pain in her child's eyes and cry and in her own heart at her helplessness and she continued to pull as hard as she could against her restraints.

"There is a broken door up the gray metal steps to your left…go inside."

Sydney's hair on her arms and the back of her neck was standing on end but she couldn't le her mother down. She pulled on the old door and walked cautiously inside, hearing the squeal of a rat as she stepped on his tail and made her jump, looking around and seeing hundreds of pairs of beady eyes looking at her. She didn't have time to hear the rest of the man's instructions when she felt the sharp pain to the back of her neck and the instant wave of dizziness before falling to her knees and then onto the floor.

Irina couldn't take it anymore, her baby had been screaming bloody murder and shaking, real tears rolling down her face as she looked to her mother for help for over the last twenty minutes and Irina had rubbed her wrists raw to bloody messes with her efforts of trying to pull out of her shackles. With one last tug the metal dug deeply into her flesh hitting bone and she bit back a scream of pain and of realization she wasn't going to get out of them and stopped pulling, turned back to Lena and let her tears fall, as she began to sob stretching as far as she could trying to reach her baby.

"We can't pick up her phone's signal. It must be _Off_." Marshall gulped starting to sweat on the other end of the line with Jack Bristow.

Jack started rubbing the bridge of his nose with his eyes screwed shut, knowing Sydney would never shut her phone off during an emergency like the one they were having now with Irina and Lena. tTe only reason it would be '_Off'_…is if someone else turned it off.

* * *

**_*Malleus Maleficarum*_**

"We've brought you a visitor," Cuvee smiled brightly, barging through the door and leering down at Irina as Lena screamed on the other side of the room, and Irina cried. Right behind him through the door came two guards carrying an unconscious Sydney and Irina's tears only fell harder as she gasped for breath, her nightmare only getting worse. They shackled Sydney to the wall to her right and injected something into her arm to bring her awake again.

"What a heroic little tale." Cuvee slapped Sydney's face repeatedly bringing her around. "You come to save your bastard baby in Moscow almost a year ago and now here we are again, only she came to save you, Irina!"

Irina tried desperately to hold back her flood of tears at the thought of Sydney coming to rescue her and ending up in hell with her. Sydney's eyes began to flutter feeling the stinging of her cheeks and the taste of blood inside her mouth from his efforts.

"Well hello, Sydney, nice to see you again." Cuvee cupped her face, brushing his thumb over her face. "Still as beautiful as ever." Her head felt heavy from the drugs effect and she heard her sister's hoarse scream coming from the opposite corner.

"Lena? Mom?" She gasped her eyes finally focusing on her sister lying in the corner and her mother shackled and bleeding to the wall beside her, obviously crying.

"Yes, Grand Duchess. your royal whore of a mother and bastard sister are here, too." He smiled seeing the flash of panic and sadness race through Sydney's eyes. "We've been waiting for you to start our little party."

"You're a fucking bastard!" She spat at him unafraid and he laughed deeply.

"Oh Irina, she is your daughter!" He glanced back to Irina, "Same age, same looks, same fighting spirit that you had when you arrived in Kashmir! This will truly be fun!"

"If you touch one hair on her head-" Irina seethed in anger and she pulled roughly against her chains making them snap when they reached their length in attack mode.

"You'll do what, Irina? You are in no position to make demands now. You're _not_ 'The Man' here! This is my game!" He moved to her quickly with his own anger building mixed with his lust and ripped her head back with his hand tangled into her hair, and pressed her roughly against the wall pinning her with his groin and ravaging her neck with his mouth as she fought against him.

Sydney's eyes instantly flooding with tears seeing the horrid monster attack her mother again.

Irina bit his lip hard, drawing blood instantly.

"_Bitch!_" He spat the blood at her and backhanded her hard across the face, knocking her face against the cement wall with a treacherous smile. "Let the games begin!" He said in a low and deadly tone, watching the new blood seep from Irina's forehead wound, her lips and nose.

Her body was getting weak from lack of insulin and no food for too many hours and she struggled to stand upright with her concussion and the new forceful hit across her face. As Cuvee backed up, Irina dropped to her knees and head lulled.

"_Mom!_" Sydney screamed over Lena's cries from her restraints with tears in her eyes seeing the state her mother was in. "She needs insulin! You're going to kill her!" She hissed at Cuvee and he smiled at her in return.

"That is the point, my dear Sydney." He replied calmly and wiped the blood on his lip with the back of his hand. "But…because I want this to be as long and as torturous as for her as possible." He paused removing a syringe filled with clear liquid from his jacket pocket, "I will give you what you need for now." He tapped the needle getting the air bubbles out and kneeled down to Irina's level as her body hung to the floor, her arms suspended in the air by her chains. "I heard about your new ailment, Irina." He clicked his tongue like he was ashamed and shook his head with a smile as he slid the needle into Irina's exposed thigh and injected her while Sydney gained a fresh round of tears watching the sick man with his twisted games. "Now, let the fun begin." He stood back up and walked to the corner where Lena was screaming and picked her up gently.

Irina's heart was breaking and she had no strength to stand as her tears began welling in her eyes.

Sydney went into full-blown panic mode seeing the man holding her baby sister, especially after learning what he'd done with her brother as a method of torture for her mother. He removed a long stiletto from his jacket and traced it lightly down the front of Lena's chest while she was in his arms crying hysterically.

"Oh God…" Irina gasped softly as a whimper when he stood along side Sydney.

"Leave her alone, _you sonofabitch!_" Sydney's eyes burned with tears seeing her sister.

"You know, I learned something about how to break your mother from her time in Kashmir. I'm sure it will be just as effective on you." He looked pointedly at Sydney and then Irina as he slid the knife up the middle of Lena's clothes cutting them off of her.

"I will kill you! I swear to God!" Irina seethed on the verge of losing consciousness, watching as he slid the back of the knife over Lena's exposed belly and chest.

"I've heard that before." He laughed mockingly, "Now, Sydney, back to what I learned about your mother." He turned his attention to her eldest daughter and placed the blade against her neck, pressing just enough to pierce the skin and create a thin red line of blood. "She, herself can withstand great amounts of pain with no tears at all but she cannot stand to see others punished for her." He slid the knife slightly, barely touching Lena's skin. "That is the greatest torture of all for her. This is where you come in and your bastard sister." He leered down at the baby nestled in his arm and quivering from crying so hard, so long. "I think you must be the same. Let's test that theory."

Cuvee stepped backwards with a smile, watching as both Irina's and Sydney's eyes widened, and he opened his arm, letting Lena fall as Irina and Sydney both screamed watching her fall to the hard tiled floor only to have him grasp her tiny arm before her full-body could hit the ground, with a sickening tiny snap as her collarbone broke. The baby screamed bloody murder as he pulled her back up to him, slowly and by one arm.

"_You motherfucker!_" Irina screamed in sheer anguish hearing the baby's bone snap and hearing her blood curdling screams on pain.

"Oh my God…" Sydney cried, not believing what she just saw the man do to her baby sister all the while smiling at the sheer torment it was for her mother. "Leave her alone! She's just a baby!"

"That makes no difference to me. She is the bastard daughter of a KGB whore who failed her mission miserably by falling in love with the enemy!" His piercing gaze never left Irina's, "And obviously, she's in need of some conditioning you choose, Irina."

"_Choose what?_" Irina screamed and could barely breath or take her eyes off of her baby who was holding her arm at a funny angle against her side, crying loudly in pain as the tears rolled off her cheeks. Irina's rage could hardly be contained as she fought to stay conscious.

"You choose which weakness that will join us in our game." He looked between the baby and Sydney. "Your little bastard baby?" He ran his knife down Lena's chest and stomach, piercing her flesh just enough to create a thin red line of blood and cutting her diaper clean off, as Sydney chanted, '_Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!_' "Or your gorgeous bastard Sydney?" His knife swiftly went through Sydney's shirt, slicing it up the middle and cutting it and leaving her body exposed; the knife trailing along the swell of her breasts behind her black bra with a lecherous smile.

Irina sobbed knowing that he would ravage whatever daughter she chose and she couldn't do it. The thought of what he would do to them, unbearable.

"You can't expect me to choose between my daughters! Gerard…_please!_ I'll do anything you want! Just let them go!" She begged and Sydney's tears flushed her face.

"_No Mom!_" She saw her mother laying herself on the sacrificial altar and couldn't bear to think of what that would mean. "Choose me! She's just a baby! I can handle it." She sobbed trying to find her mother's gaze seeing the blood running into Irina's glazed eyes knowing what she was volunteering for.

"No…no, I can't do it. I can't do it to you, Sydney." Irina shook her head, sobbing having no idea what to do; let one daughter be cut into small pieces in front of her or let the other be ravaged as he raped her and then killed her as well when he was through. There was no 'win' in this situation.

"_Choose, Irina!_" Cuvee hissed, thoroughly enjoying this show before him and disgusted all at the same time for Irina's love for her daughters and them for her.

"_I can't!_" She wailed, "Don't make me! Just take me, I won't fight you!" She begged, "Gerard, please!"

"Look at you." He shook his head in utter disgust, "Now you're begging. Choose, Irina!"

"I can't!" She screamed at him in rage and pain, completely helpless in this situation and barely able to keep sitting upright.

* * *

"Jack," Katya burst through the door into the conference room with terror running rampant across her features. "Have you heard anything?"

"No." Jack said quickly as his heart raced with unfathomable speed.

"Jack, the things he did to her!" Katya sobbed with tears streaming down her face, "We have to find her. Quickly!"

"I know, Katya!" He snapped with his own frustration and then quickly placed his hand on her arm with apologetic eyes, "I'm sorry. Sydney is gone too. We think he has her as well." He added softly and watched the horror and shock spread across her face.

"All three of them." She answered barely above a whisper and fell back into the chair, losing all ability to stand.

* * *

Gerard's anger flared when Irina didn't answer and he gripped Lena's upper arm in his fist and snapped it quickly as another tiny sound of her bone breaking echoed off the cement walls, as did the screams of Irina, Sydney and the baby.

"I will keep going unless you choose!" His eyes pierced Irina's with a haunting blackness of pure evil coursing through his veins, his hand on Lena's other arm, ready to break it as well.

Irina sobbed loudly looking at her baby and the sick angle her tiny arm was now in, shaking with pain and crying uncontrollably, his hand ready to do more damage to her little body. He started to grip Lena's arm tightly, out of patience when Irina started screaming '_No!_'

"I choose…Sydney." She sobbed barely above a whisper looking at the floor in disgust with her self. "I'm so sorry, Sweetheart." Her blurry eyes met with her oldest daughters as they both cried for what had happened and what was about to come. "I'm so sorry…"

"It's ok, Mom…It's ok." Sydney tried to comfort her mother even as they stood on the threshold of the depths of hell, knowing her mother had made the only choice she could and that Lena would be dead shortly if she hadn't have chosen Sydney.

"Good choice, Irina." Cuvee smiled widely at her, turning his sickening stare to Sydney's exposed body, "I think I'll have much more fun with Sydney then with this little maggot." His gaze fell to the baby in his arms and he walked to the corner setting her naked, bleeding, broken body back on the ground with a disturbing gentleness and a smile. "It's time to go, ladies!" He turned and lit a cigarette as four guards entered the room, two each grabbing a hold of Sydney and Irina.

"What do you mean? Where are we going?" Irina asked in utter horror with her eyes flashing between her girls. "What about Lena?"

Cuvee inhaled deeply as a smile slid into place, watching as two of them unsheathed syringes and plunged them into Sydney and Irina's arms.

"We're going on trip and the little bastard will stay here…let rats eat her. I'm sure they'll smell the fresh blood and come running once we're gone." His smile widened as Irina fought against the guards screaming and crying hysterically before the drug took effect and she dropped, as did Sydney. "All right, let's move. We don't have a lot of time." Cuvee told the guard who had betrayed Irina and watched the men de-shackle her and Sydney as he continued to take long drags on his cigarette. "Get them into the van. Is the plane ready and waiting?"

"Yes Mr. Cuvee, the pilot is on stand-bye." The man looked from where they were carrying the two women out of the room to the baby in the corner, bleeding and crying hysterically, her legs tense and sticking straight out but her arm, lifeless at her side. "What about the baby? What do we do with her?" He asked Cuvee disturbed by the scene before him.

"We leave her for the rats," Cuvee blew his smoke in the man's face, annoyed with the concern he saw floating in his eyes, "Just as I said." He dropped his cigarette on the floor and pushed past the man to get into the van waiting for them.

The man looked from the door back to the baby and his guilt was eating at him; he'd done this. When he agreed to help Cuvee for money, he had no idea they would take the baby as well. No idea what the man had planned for Irina. He thought he would hold her for ransom, being the Tsar of Russia, and give her back when they were paid. Now he realized, too late, that this man was mad and he wanted no money in exchange for the Empress, he wanted revenge and planned to torture and kill her slowly. His mind raced with what to do.

The baby would be dead within the hour if he just left her in the condition she was in. He grabbed the shirt that had been cut from Sydney and laid its fragments over the hoarse, wailing baby in attempt to give her naked body some warmth. He pulled Sydney's cell phone out of his pocket, having taken it off of her when they grabbed and searched her. He flipped it open and pressed '_Power_,' his finger hovering over the '_Send_' button for a moment as he looked down at the baby and to the door. With a sad flash of guilt, he pressed '_Send_' and hoped that whomever the last person Sydney called answered. He lay the open phone next to Lena and ran quickly for the stairs, jumping in just as they finished loading Sydney and Irina.


	52. Chapter 52

_**AN: Things are about to get insanely intense. You have been WARNED. **_

_**Music for this chapter (on repeat): Nothing Else Matters (Zero Dark Thirty Version) by performed by Scala and Kolacny Brothers from Zero Dark Thirty, Da Svidanya 'Red Army Choir Anthem' by Basil Poledouris from The Hunt for The Red October Soundtrack, An Angel Falls by Gabriel Yared from City of Angels Soundtrack**_

* * *

FIFTY-TWO

o

Jack was in the middle of explaining what they knew to Katya when her phone started ringing. She picked it up and her eyes went wide.

"It's Sydney!" She turned to him in surprise and answered immediately. "Sydney!" She called out and inhaled sharply when the only sounds she heard were the baby's blood curdling screams. "Jack?" She burst into tears and handed the phone to a pale-faced Jack, who had no idea what to expect on the other end.

Weiss, Vaughn, Vladimir, Sark and a handful of Russian agents gathered around.

"Sydney?" He called into the phone and his breath caught in his throat when he heard his baby screaming in the background and hoarse from apparently crying so hard…so long...an unbearable scream he'd never heard come from a baby. "It's Lena." His eyes flashed up to the group who looked at him stunned and bewildered by what he meant by that. "Transfer the call to speaker phone!" He shouted to no one in particular and waited for the nod before hitting the black button on the phone on the table and the room filled with Lena's trembling screams sounding as though she was in agony and all their hearts stopped.

"Why? What is he doing to her?" Katya sobbed listening to her niece, "Why call and not talk?"

"Maybe Sydney can't talk and was able to push '_Send_' so that we could pick up her signal!" Jack's wheels began to turn and rapidly flew into action, trying desperately not to break down and crumble with the sounds of his baby's wails. "Get Marshall to trace Sydney's signal!" He shouted at Vaughn who looked like he was about to vomit before dialing rapidly on his phone.

"Marshall!" Vaughn practically screamed into the phone, "We've got Sydney's signal…pick up the feed and trace the location she's calling from!"

"Ok, ok I'm going!" He spun on his chair and pushed off flying across the Ops floor to another computer as Kendall approached from behind.

"What's going on?" Kendall looked over his shoulder as Marshall typed furiously.

"They've picked up Sydney's signal and now…we're picking up the line." He spoke in a broke sentence as he pulled up the call and inhaled sharply when Lena's cries came blaring out of the speakers, stopping all movement on the floor.

"Oh my God!" Carrie gasped, dropping her stack of files and covering her mouth with her hand when she heard the baby's hoarse cries and wondering what hell she was in.

"Dear God…" Kendall hissed out as his own heart began to race.

"Marshall!" Vaughn boomed, looking for answers unable to stand the cries blaring over the speakerphone.

"I'm going as fast as I can but it's a weak signal!" Marshall panicked and sweat began to cover his brow, hearing his God Daughter in such obvious pain.

"Do you hear that?" Weiss slapped his hand on Sark's chest beside him, grabbing his tie with eyes wide, "That's a train! Do you hear it?" He asked picking up the faint warning blast of a train's whistle in the background.

"I hear it!" Sark's eyes went just as wide, listening and panicked him self, hearing Lena's cries weaken.

"Must be near a railroad crossing!" Weiss swallowed hard as his heart thumped loudly in his ears.

"This is the best I can do right now!" Marshall transmitted an image and it came up on Jack's laptop screen, "I can only narrow the signal down to the tower being used and this is it!"

"That's a ten square mile radius in Moscow! They could be hundreds of places!" Jack's anxiety was gaining desperation hearing his baby fading in the background. "We don't have time to look in all those places!" He added and they all knew what he meant, they could all hear for themselves that Lena was growing weaker with every cry.

"I'll keep trying!" Marshall said determinedly with tears in his eyes as he continued to pound at the computer, not willing to give up.

"And in the meantime we'll start checking every location near train tracks within those ten miles." Vaughn added with his own determination and Putin began assembling a mass of agents and police to start checking everywhere in that area for Irina, Sydney and the baby.

"I'm coming, too!" Katya stood and Jack followed.

"No Katya! You must stay here." Jack said softly, grabbing his jacket off the chair, preparing to leave.

"No Jack! That's my sister! And my nieces!" She cried with determination, "I know what that monster is capable of!"

"Which is exactly why you must stay here." He grabbed her arms with both of his hands, looking into her dark determined eyes. "You don't have the training to go tactical if need be and if you end up getting killed and we rescue Irina, she'll never forgive herself." He knew he was pulling the guilt card to get his way but he needed to convince her she had to stay. "Please stay with Vladimir and wait here. We'll be on Coms with you at all times, alright?" He cupped her face seeing the absolute fear there at what was happening to his missing girls.

She nodded solemnly in resignation and he leaned forward and kissed her forehead before charging out the door followed by Weiss, Vaughn, Sark and twenty Russian agents met with more outside.

They split up into teams of four, each coming from separate side of the 10 square mile radius that the tower Sydney's signal was bouncing off of as Marshall tried to pinpoint her location with no luck.

"Her signal is dying…the battery must be getting low." Marshall gulped, speaking into their Coms continually searching his screen.

"If that signal dies before we find her…" Jack couldn't continue the thought and floored it to the next train crossing, having visited multiple already.

"Take a left up here, it's an industrial area with a train yard." Sark commanded from the backseat where he was searching on his own laptop through the city for possible areas where they could be to hear the train.

Jack whipped the car onto the road and floored it into the night as they descended into a part of 'old Russia' still battered from the Soviet days. Mostly non-functional factories, and power plants…a perfect place to keep them, as it was out of the way in a part of the city no one ventured to.

"There is the car Sydney left in!" Vaughn shouted and jumped out before Jack even had the car fully stopped when they approached the tracks. They all quickly followed behind him.

"What have you got, Jack?" Kendall asked nervously hopeful on the other end, wiping sweat from his own brow, as the baby's cries became nothing more then hoarse gasps from exhaustion.

"Nothing! Goddamnit nothing!" He cursed loudly and pounded the cars window with his fist, cracking it.

"We have to be close." Sark looked around and then off into the distance. "I've got an idea. Blast the car's horn." He commanded at the bewildered faces. "Blast the horn and if we hear it come through on Sydney's cell phone we will know we are really near."

Jack's eyes flew wide in surprise at the idea and flung open the car door, blasting the horn as long and as hard as he could.

"We hear it!" Katya lit up and stood from where she was sitting, with new hope. "Jack, we hear it! Faintly in the background but we hear it!"

"Then we're really close." He jumped out and fled back to the car as the other's followed, "There are abandoned factories at the end of this road. I'm guessing they're being held there." His foot hit the gas pedal and they tore out on the gravel and down the road with a maddening speed into the unlighted distract.

"We'll direct everyone to that area." Vladimir added with determination.

"Brilliant idea." Weiss looked over at Sark, amazed that he thought to do that.

Jack had to agree with Weiss and was thankful to have people with him who, were thinking, as he clearly was not altogether on this mission that involved the three most important people in his life in the hands of the most evil man he'd ever met.

"Shit, this place is enormous!" Weiss grabbed clutched his gun tightly staring at the darkened enormity before him as they jumped out of the car, on alert.

"We'll split up into two until the rest of them arrive," Jack ripped open the trunk and threw Kevlar vests at each of them. "Sark, you're with me, Vaughn and Weiss, start on the south end." He strapped on the black vest and handed each of them another round of ammo. "Let's go." His adrenaline surging through his body as he and Sark crept quickly around the buildings, looking for a way in and spotting one just ahead. His baby's cries coming over their Coms had almost extinguished and his heart was in a vice inside his chest hoping they were going to make it in time and not accepting the alternative.

"Oh Jeezus!" Weiss gasped when they entered up the steps and his flashlight fell on the hundreds of beady rat eyes and they crawled over their feet!

"What is it?" Jack held his breath as he and Sark climbed an old metal staircase.

"Rats! Everywhere!" Weiss kicked his feet violently and trudged on through the room with Vaughn behind him.

The Russian agents had arrived and spanned out, covering the rest of the factory and on Coms with the other four.

"No one's here." Vaughn breathed in defeat at the endless darkened rooms as they went from floor to floor.

"Keep looking!" Jack commanded, "She's here, I know it." He could feel it in his heart and for once he was going to listen to his instincts.

"Jack…hurry." Katya sobbed quietly into their ears as she listened to the baby's cries all but disappeared and the squeak of rats nearby. "I can hear the rats."

Suddenly, they heard Lena let out another vicious but hoarse cry and the loud squeaking of rats and it sent another burst of adrenaline through everyone as they started running through their search. Irina and Sydney were more then likely, no longer here but the baby was and they had to find her.

_***Nothing Else Matters- Zero Dark Thirty version***_

"Look!" Vaughn shouted to Weiss at a dim light coming from a door on the far end of the factory on the second floor. "We see a light on the far end of the second floor! " He and Weiss charged full ahead towards the lighted doorway, jumping railings and old factory equipment to get there faster and Sark and Jack ran towards the same area.

"I can hear her!" Weiss shouted and took the steps two at a time with his body moving faster then he ever thought possible and everyone felt a small sigh of relief. He tore through the door first and scanned the room, spotting her in the corner and five rats scurrying around her, biting her and testing her flesh. "_Sonofabitch!_" He went flying to her side and swatted the rats away, scooping her up immediately as Vaughn fired and killed all the rats.

"Is she ok?" Jack gasped flying through the factory, not caring if anyone was there to shoot him or not he needed to get to his baby.

"Oh my God…" Weiss looked at the baby in his arms and tears came flooding forward unable to stop them when he saw the cut down the middle of her body, the blood covering her, old and new, the bites of the rats and her primal scream when he shifted her. "Mike, look." He motioned with his eyes at the sickening angle at which her little arm was bent and he was afraid to move, realizing she had broken bones.

"We need a medic! Get medic now!" Vaughn trembled and screamed into his Com, looking down and picking up the pieces of fabric that were once Sydney's shirt, his face gone ashen as he looked around the room.

Blood smears on one wall and covering the shackles on the ends of thick chains. Bloody handprints and smears on the cold tiled floor, reaching into the corner where Lena was but unable to reach her with the chains length. Sydney and Irina had been here.

"What is it? What's wrong with her?!" Jack screamed into his Com as he and Sark charged towards the end of the building, fear gripping him tightly.

"Jack, just get up here!" Weiss answered into his Com with an obvious shaking and tear filled voice that sent a wave of panic through Russian and CIA Ops as well as Jack and Sark.

"Tell me!" Jack jumped over a mess of piping into the floor feeling his heart about to explode, knowing his baby was hurt badly if Weiss was crying.

"She's broken, Jack…bleeding and bitten…her arm is definitely broken." Weiss tried to hold back on his tears at the almost lifeless tiny baby in his arms. "She's cold…and pale…Mike, give me your shirt!" He suddenly realized she was freezing from lying naked on the cold tiles.

Vaughn immediately started tearing off his vest and shirt, knowing exactly why.

Katya started sobbing hearing the damage report and Vladimir enveloped her into his arms.

"How could he hurt the baby?" She wailed softly into his chest, pounding her fists into him with hate for Cuvee.

Jack burst into the door with his eyes rapidly scanning the room and seeing the blood smears and shackles before landing on Vaughn pulling his shirt over his head and Weiss standing in the corner holding his naked trembling baby, covered in blood. He took rapid steps towards her closing the distance and saw the way her arm was lifeless and twisted at her side. The cut running down her chest and belly from a knife, he knew by its perfect straightness. He saw the cuts from the accident on her head, face and arms…and her deathly pale appearance.

"How do we do this?" Vaughn stood awkwardly with his shirt in his spread hands, "I don't want to move her, she screamed when you picked her up." He looked at Weiss, the baby and then Jack terrified with pooling eyes. "What if I do more damage?"

"Mike, she's freezing to death!" Weiss glared at him behind blurry eyes, channeling his anger any way he could.

Jack felt her skin and threw down his guns, stripped off his own vest and ripped open the buttons on his shirt, taking it off.

"She needs body heat, now! She is freezing to death." He inhaled a sharp breath as he tried to take her from Weiss very gently and she let out another strangled scream that was so weak Jack's eyes flushed with tears that immediately started pouring down his cheeks. "Help me keep her arm still!" He commanded as he moved her to face his chest and noticed her sunken shoulder. "Her clavicle is broken, too." He whispered out in realization and shivered when he felt her cold body against his warm chest, his hands gently positioning themselves to hold her still and not moved her arm as he covered her with his shirt and Vaughn's. "Shhh, Peaunut…Daddy's here, nobody's going to hurt you anymore." He tried to whisper into her ear to soothe her small cries as she trembled from the cold, from the shock and from the fear. "We need an air ambulance now!" Jack looked up feeling his baby slipping away beneath his fingers.

"It's on it's way, Jack." Vladimir answered him softly, blinking back his own tears, refusing to let them fall.

"Sydney was definitely here." Vaughn's tears spilled down his cheeks, holding up the cut fabric to Jack and then looking over to the walls with the shackles.

"This must be where Irina was…" Sark added softly, picking up a bloody shackle and seeing the outstretched, hand blood smears on the floor. "She was reaching for the baby." His eyes and everyone else's following the horrid blood path that ended just before she could reach where the baby was lying in the corner.

A Russian agent burst through the door with horror in his eyes seeing the bloody room and the state of the baby in Jack's arms. "We found tire tracks in the gravel out back. Blood drips on the rocks leading from there…to here." He spoke to Jack in rapid Russian. "They are gone…maybe an hour…45 minutes ago, I believe."

Jack wanted to scream in rage and pain at his world caving in around him. Forty-eight hours ago his life had been perfect, at home with Irina in bed, watching her sleep and laughing with her; kissing his baby good morning when she smiled at him. Sydney just hours ago in his presence now gone, too.

"The medical helicopter is landing now." The Russian agent relayed, hearing it come through on his Com, "You go…we'll stay here and look for anything that will lead us to them." He nodded at Jack with sincerity seeing the man's world was falling apart and his baby was dying in his arms.

Jack nodded back and the four of them with Lena, bounded down the steps as quickly as they could.

"You can't go, sir, we can't take the extra weight." The flight doctor informed Jack running to greet them as the helicopter blades cut through the air, stirring up dust, waiting for Lena.

"I'm not leaving her again!" Jack yelled back over the roar of the blades, nestling his face against her head, desperate to hang onto her.

"I'm sorry sir, but you can't…we'll take good care of her, I promise." He reached for Lena and Jack sobbed as he handed her over and feeling as though the last bit of his heart was ripped out. "We'll see you at the hospital."

The doctor nodded and ducked under the blades entering the helicopter and they stood there watching as he laid Lena on a stretcher bed, a hundred times her small size and place an oxygen mask over her little face as the doors closed and they took off.

"Let's go." Jack moved with a frenzied pace towards the car and they all followed. His mind was racing a million miles an hour and praying that they'd gotten to her in time; praying that Irina and Sydney were both still alive and that he would find them soon. His heart felt like glass and exploding in slow motion, feeling every shard pierce his flesh from the inside out thinking about what that evil monster had done to his baby. A little, innocent baby. It was obviously to torment Irina who was bleeding and shackled and keeping her just out of reach.

If Cuvee was capable of doing that to a tiny baby, Jack couldn't stand to imagine what he was going to do to Irina and Sydney…

"I knew the man was evil but I can't believe he could do that do a baby." Weiss gasped softly in the backseat as Moscow flew by them, Jack going well over the legal limits racing towards the hospital.

"Sydney, had to know she was walking into a trap! Why? Why would she do that?" Vaughn felt his own tears stinging and his anger taking over, he wiped at them viciously.

"My guess…is that she knew what she was walking into…but didn't want to leave Irina alone." Sark added quietly, realizing the depth of love between a mother and child all over again.

Katya and Vladimir arrived at the hospital the same time that they had and were a bit surprised to see a shirtless Jack and Vaughn step out of the car. The dried blood on Jack's chest suggested he been holding Lena…and then they remembered her need for body heat.

"Where is my baby?" Jack demanded to know when they entered the hospital emergency room and the nurse, recognizing the importance of this man, showed him immediately into the room where they were working on Lena as the others waited in the lobby. His breath caught when he saw how extremely tiny she was laying in the big bed, her arms too little for the IV so one was started in her head. She was quiet, and still as a nurse held an oxygen mask near her face, obviously sedated, while the doctors tried to assess the damage. A silver-heating blanket was placed over her tiny body and Jack stood frozen on his feet watching the mass of people fly around the room attempting to keep his child alive.

"Mr. Bristow, she is in Critical Condition," One of the younger doctors approached him as they began to prepare Lena to move, "We are taking her for x-rays, an MRI and a CATSCAN to determine the damage. Before we even see the X-ray, I can tell you her Humorous has been broken as well as her Clavicle. I need to know, what happened to her?"

"I don't know for sure." Jack spoke softly, swallowing hard as his eyes filled with tears again, "She was kidnapped…this is how we found her."

The doctor nodded in understanding.

"The tiny puncture wounds?" He looked at Jack curiously, having an idea of what they could be but not certain.

"Rat bites. She was in an abandoned factory." He inhaled a shaky breath, wrapping his arms around himself watching them with her.

"Okay." The doctor touched his arm lightly. "We'll screen her for Rabies and treat her accordingly. Right now, on top of the broken bones, she is suffering from Hypothermia, exhaustion, dehydration, malnutrition and she's in shock from the trauma. That is a great deal for such a little baby." He looked Jack sadly in the eyes, hoping to pull off a miracle and save the tiny Grand Duchess. "We're doing everything we can."

Jack nodded, unable to find his words and afraid to speak.

"You can come with us to do the tests. I know you don't want to leave her alone." He offered Jack a small smile before setting back to work on Lena.

They started to wheel the big bed carrying Lena past him and stopped momentarily for Jack. He came to the side and placed a light palm over her little head, barely touching her and leaned over, kissing her cold cheek as his salty tears fell into her soft hair.

"I love you, baby girl. Hold on." He whispered as more tears fell, when he kissed her again.

They took her through all of the scans, tests, and x-rays before telling Jack he had to step out a minute. They'd given him a doctor's scrub shirt to wear and when he entered the waiting room, found Vaughn wearing a matching one.

"Jack?" Katya launched out of her chair and into his arms, a fresh round of tears running down her cheeks seeing the exhausted man before her. "How is she?"

"She's Critical but stable for the moment…they sedated her." He spoke barely above a whisper as his hands tried to wipe the tiredness from his face. "She's suffering from exhaustion…from crying for so long…sleep deprivation and she's malnourished and dehydrated," He shook his head with the thought that her cries were that of hunger before her pain and knew how Irina must have been reacting unable to help her. "She's also suffering from hypothermia and in shock from the trauma…her humorous and clavicle bones…are both broken." He looked up and the rage filled his eyes again, "There is a deep bruise of a hand forming around the top of her arm over the break. The bone was definitely snapped on purpose and her arm was dislocated. That combined with the break in her clavicle the doctor believes they were caused by being held at one point…by just her little arm."

"_Sick bastard!_" Weiss hissed in horror at the thought of purposely breaking a baby's bones.

"How do they fix that? I mean she's so little?" Vaughn held his breath with concern, flooding his eyes as the tears built.

"They put her arm back into the socket and now, have to cast her arm for the humorous. The clavicle break, she just has to be kept still until it heals." Jack sighed, trying to calm himself of the rage taking him over, knowing he had to go back in there in a few minutes and not wanting that to be in his touch when he saw his baby girl. "Is there anything on Irina or Sydney?" He rubbed his tired eyes; unable to breath thinking about them and the danger they were in.

"No, but it was confirmed; Gerard Cuvee is indeed the one who abducted them." Vladimir spat in disgust of the man he knew from the KGB, never liking him or his methods. "His DNA was pulled from two cigarettes on the floor in that room. The blood on the walls, floor and shackles…is Irina's." His voice quivered in thinking about it.

"She doesn't have any insulin." Jack just said out of the blue as the random thought suddenly entered his drained mind hearing 'blood and Irina' together and his eyes flashed up. "Oh God…" He held his breath, as the stack was continually growing higher against Irina.

"Mr. Bristow?" A nurse called from behind them softly with a hint of a smile, "You can all go in now. They've set her arm and she's sleeping with the sedation."

"Thank you." Jack answered her in Russian and they followed her quietly into the hospital's Neonatal Intensive Care Unit for babies.

His eyes washed over with tears and he heard Katya gasp when she grasped his hand, laying eyes on Lena inside the plastic incubator. Her little eyes closed with padded shields, taped shut to keep out the bright light. A feeding tube had been put into her tiny nose and taped to her little face. Electrodes were stuck to her chest monitoring her heart rate and breathing. The cuts and bites on her body had been cleaned, sutured and wrapped and her arm little arm was wrapped in a full cast from her fingers all the way up to her shoulder. She was positioned in such a way that her clavicle was straightened and a padded band was wrapped around her tiny chest and arm, keeping her immobile.

"We've examined her," The said quietly with sad eyes, looking at the expectant faces flooded with worry, "She hasn't been sexually abused." Her own eyes filled with tears that they even had to perform such an examination on a three and a half month old baby.

"Oh, 'Thank God…" Katya gasped as her hand flew over her mouth and fresh tears blazoned across her eyes. Jack closed his eyes and turned his head down silently saying a prayer of 'thanks' having not even thought about that horrible possibility until this moment.

"Her heart rate has stabilized as well as her breathing and her temperature level is within normal range again." The nurse informed them with a small smile through her tears as she charted Lena's numbers on the machine outside the incubator, monitoring all her vitals. "She's a remarkable baby."

"She is…" Jack sighed in relief at hearing her steady heartbeat and the pink returning to her skin. "How long is she going to be unconscious for?" He asked in fluent Russian with his eyes never leaving his baby.

"The doctor will probably keep her sedated for at least four days…maybe longer." She offered them another small smile, knowing that was always hard to hear for parents, "With as much trauma as she's been through, she needs to rest completely to heal and build her strength up again. With infants, it's always harder to keep them calm and not crying, working themselves up if they are awake an unable to move. Sedation is really the best way at this point. When the doctor feels she's strong enough, he'll pull back the sedation."

Jack hated it but understood it, and placed his hand against the plastic encasing his baby. "I understand."

"I am afraid that only two of you will be allowed to stay with her at a time." She smiled sadly, folding her chart across her chest looking at all the sad faces, "I knew you'd all want to see her together but…the NICU rules are two visitors at a time and now, some of you will have to go. Please go home, rest. She's in good hands and I promise we are doing everything we can to bring her back to health as fast as we can. She's holding on right now and I expect this little fighter will pull through."

The nurse obviously had no idea that Lena's mother and sister were still missing. There would be no rest for them until they were found.

"I'll stay with you." Katya squeezed Jack's hand with a small smile and the others whispered their goodnights and went to wait in the waiting room.

Weiss checked in with Kendall and gave him the update on Lena and what they learned from the factory, Vaughn called his mother and father in Paris and broke the tragic news; they were getting the next flight to Moscow and Sark sat behind his laptop, pouring over everything trying to find a clue as to where Cuvee had taken Irina and Sydney.

The man was intelligent, and wealthy and had businesses and homes all around the world; finding him was no small task.

"I can't believe this is happening." Jack sighed, with a heavy heart staring into the plastic encasing at Lena. "He did this to hurt Irina; torturing her…by torturing her baby." A single tear slipped down his face and fell onto the incubator.

Katya listened quietly with tears streaming down her face, knowing he was right and terrified for what was happening to Irina and Sydney.

"I failed her last time; she was screaming for me and I didn't come for her. Save her from him, I have to now. I have to find them. I will find them." He said more resolutely with determination. "And when I do that man will die a slow and torturous death.. That, I vow…"

"She knows you'll come for her, Jack. This time, she knows." Katya wrapped her hand around his and squeezed, "And she won't give up. She'll find a way to keep them alive until you find them."

"That's what I'm afraid of." Jack turned his eyes to her slowly as they filled with tears again. Finding away to keep them both alive would no doubt involve Irina sacrificing herself for time.

* * *

Sydney woke feeling groggy and lying on a musty smelling two-inch mattress pad in a darkened cell. Slowly she got to her feet and wavered softly finding her balance made her way towards the front. The back and sides were cement blocks and the front was a row of bars as she neared the cell door her vision became clear and the light of the sun from the giant hole in the roof of the building illuminated the space around her outside of the cell.

Across the way, on the other side of the building were another row of cells…row, on top of row as she looked up and down and turning her head to the right, gasped in horror when she realized where she was staring at the giant cross at the end of the giant aisle…Kashmir.

_***Da Svidanya- Red Army Choir Anthem***_

Her tears came flying forth as she clung to the cold metal bars and looked down at the space she'd recognized instantly now from the videos of her mother's time here. She looked to the now broken cells and saw flashes in her mind of the screaming prisoners, hanging out of their cells as the guards drug her mother in below…like ghosts haunting she heard their faint singing of the old Soviet hymn and inhaled a ragged breath.

She looked around rapidly for any sign of her mother and found none.

"Mom?" Sydney cried, pressing her face between the bars, "Mom!" She called out again, louder as her tears surged forward wondering where her mother was and what they were doing to her. She fell to her knees, crying and gripping the bars thinking about her mother and her sister. _Lena_, her mind screamed and she wailed loudly thinking about her sister's death that had surely come, left alone, broken, naked and bleeding on the cold floor of the factory. Left for the rats to feed on. "Oh God,_ why?_" She screamed loudly looking heavenward sobbing. _Why would he bring them back together only to endure more loss? Why would he give them Lena and take her back, why? _

A half hour later Irina shook her head slowly, pressing her palms to the sides of her aching head as she tried to sit up and focus on her surroundings. She could hear faint crying coming from somewhere and tried hard to focus, finding it too difficult with low blood sugar and the drugs. She slid off the side of the bed unable to stand and pulled herself to the bars at the front of her cell, sobbing when she realized where she was...back in her old cell in Kashmir.

"Oh God…" She gasped in Russian as her eyes flooded with tears.

"_Mom!_" She heard Sydney call to her from the cell next to her and more tears flooded her eyes.

"_Sydney!_" Irina slid to the corner and reached her arm through the bars around the cement block wall trying to find her daughter's hand.

"_Mom!_" Sydney flew to the corner and stuck her arm through the bars, finding her mother's bloody wrist and then hand. "I thought they took you!" She gasped in relief that Cuvee wasn't off torturing her mother.

"Sweetheart, are you ok?" Irina clung tightly to her daughters' hand, resting her throbbing head softly against the bars, shaking and trembling from lack of insulin.

"Mom, I'm ok…but Lena!" Sydney sobbed resting her forehead against the cement wall that separated them.

Irina's heart immediately broke and shattered into a million pieces thinking about her baby's death, alone in a factory, broken and crying in pain…crying for her mother and left to be eaten by the scavenger rodents. She lost the battle with her tears and began sobbing, holding onto Sydney's hand with everything she had.

"I failed. I failed to protect her…" She wailed and Sydney's cries matched her mothers, her heart breaking for her sister and her mother who blamed herself.

"Mom, It's not your fault. You tried. It was impossible to reach her…to stop him."

"Sydney, I'm so sorry…" Irina inhaled a ragged breath between sobs for dragging her daughters into this mess. "You promised me…you'd stay away from him! Why didn't you stay away, Sydney? Why?" She gasped in a breath in horror knowing what was in store for her daughter…knowing what 'game' Cuvee was going to be playing.

"Mom, I couldn't leave you alone with him! We're a team remember?" Sydney held tightly to her mother's hand, pressing her forehead and other palm against the cold stonewall. "You watch my back…I watch yours. I wasn't going to let you go through this alone." She sobbed thinking about what was undoubtedly going to happen to the both of them. "I love you. I couldn't leave you alone. Not when given the chance."

Irina shook with her cries at how brave her daughter was.

"Sydney…" She gasped quietly between her cries, "I love you, too…so much. But you have to promise me, right now, that you will do _everything_ I tell you to do while we're stuck here. _Promise me, Sydney!_" Her voice changed to a desperate and commanding plea.

"Mom-" She was about to rebuff her mother's plea.

"_No_, _Sydney!_ Promise me! You must listen to me if we're going to survive this and get out of here. Promise me!" Irina grasped desperately at Sydney's fingers. "I know how his mind works, you have to promise me!"

"Ok…" Sydney's face distorted as she tried to hold back a sob, "I promise, Mom." She agreed reluctantly. "Dad and Vaughn…Weiss and Julian…Vladimir, Katya…Every Russian agency and the CIA…Mom they were all looking for you. They'll find us. Dad won't stop until he does. He won't stop!" She sobbed, hoping that they found them soon. "He loves you so much. They'll come for us. They'll come for us." She repeated softly.

Irina cried silently, holding in a sob and gasping for air trying to control her emotions.

"Mom, you're shaking." Sydney suddenly realized and didn't know if it was from the trauma of losing her sister or from her lack of insulin. "When's the last time he fed you?"

"He hasn't…" Irina exhaled softly, closing her eyes trying to stop a sob, "He'll want something in exchange for that."

_***An Angel Falls***_

The sound of heavy footsteps pulled them both from their conversation and Sydney looked out her cell terrified when she saw the four guards approaching their cells.

"Sydney, remember your promise!" Irina squeezed her hand one last time as a guard jammed his key into her cell door, apparently only taking her and not Sydney and Irina silently '_Thanked God'_ for that small miracle of the moment. "I love you, Sweetheart…never forget that!"

"Mom!" Sydney screamed watching with her face pressed through the bars as the guards entered her mother's cell. Irina had no strength to stand, let alone fight off four armed men and had no choice but to let them grasp her. Two of them hauled her up by her arms and shackled her wrists and bare ankles, dragging her by the arms out the cell so that her feet barely touched the cold floor. "_Mom!_" Sydney cried trying to reach out to her as she was taken in the opposite direction down the cellblocks pathway. "I love you!" She cried loudly after Irina, knowing she might very well never see her mother alive again.

Irina's heart was aching as she fought back her tears knowing where she was going and hearing Sydney's proclamation. She was drug down the steps and across the big aisle in front of the cross and her body involuntarily shuttered as they passed and drug through a door and up another set of stairs…the stairs to Cuvee's old office. Her tears immediately began coursing down her cheeks when she saw the old room that haunted her in her nightmares and cried silently as they bent her over, shackling her bloody, ragged wrists into the special restraints Cuvee had always loved and then her ankles to the ones on the floor, forcing her legs apart slightly and she closed her eyes, laying her head on the cool metal desk as her tears rolled over her nose and pooled on its shiny surface.

The guards left and ten minutes later she heard Cuvee's footsteps coming up the metal stairs and quickly reined in her emotions. Locking them away and out of his reach. She had survived this before…she could do it again if it meant sparing her daughter from one of his attacks.

"Now there is a vision I see in my dreams." He smiled with a leering gaze as he entered the door and saw the profile of Irina bent over his old desk, puffing on his sickening cigarette with a cigar in his jacket pocket, something he always saved for after. "This seems familiar. We shall have fun today." He walked over to her, running his hand softly over her wild mane of long hair and brushing her swollen cheek with his fingers and she tried to pull away from his touch. "I don't know why you fight it. It only arouses me more, my vicious little Minx." He laughed deeply before taking another drag. "So, do you suppose that your precious little bastard has been completely ravaged by now? Or do you think the rats are still feasting on her tender flesh?" He leaned over whispering in her ear, trying to provoke her.

Irina fought the biggest war of her life internally at keeping her emotions compartmentalized and stopped her mind from thinking about Lena right now, knowing she would lose it completely if she did.

"I'm sure that pathetic man you call your husband has traced the car Sydney arrived in by now and found the remains of your child." He inhaled giving a dramatic pause before exhaling in her face. "If there is anything left to be found. With that many rats, its doubtful…just bones perhaps." He kept prodding into her open wound with a hot tormenting poker trying to get her to break for him. "Which is more then he'll ever find of you." His eyes bore into hers with an acute hatred and lust, "Or maybe I'll mail you back to him a piece at a time." He laughed deeply and brushed her hair off her neck to place a wet kiss behind her ear sending shivers of disgust through her body, which he only took as encouragement. "I see I still have an affect on you." He smiled as his mouth moved over the exposed flesh of her upper back. "You may act disgusted but your body doesn't lie. I can remember making you cum and scream with pleasure not so long ago."

"I was faking it, every time, you bastard." She replied in a deadly calm tone, dripping with venom, remembering those revolting times where she had to sacrifice her body to him in order to get what she wanted.

His only response was more laughter, amused by her quick, witted retort.

"And let me guess, your precious Jack is the only one who can make you scream his name?" He laughed deeply, pulling his mouth away to inhale another line of nicotine, "Well I can guarantee, you'll be screaming his name again soon but for a whole other reason, my Royal Whore." His lips bit and kissed the flesh on the back of her neck before his eyes narrowed and he pressed his burning cigarette into the back of her neck, twisting it out in her skin and making Irina's face contort in pain as she held in a scream feeling and smelling her flesh burning.

When he was finished he flicked the cigarette across the room; and smiled at the new mark he made on her body.

"I think its time we teach Sydney a little history about her mother."

Irina's eyes flashed open with his words and the sound of many pairs of footsteps came rapidly up the steps. Sydney burst through the door with her head bleeding and a split lip from trying to fight with the guards and Irina saw she had inflicted some damage to them as well.

"Mom..." She hissed out barely above a whisper, tears flooding her eyes seeing her mother bent over the desk Irina had told she and her father about from her private torture and rape sessions with Cuvee.

"This bitch is feisty!" One of the guards spat wiping his bloody lip as the other two guards shackled Sydney with her arms above her head against the wall to the side and front of Irina at an angle.

Cuvee laughed stepping closer to Sydney as the guards left, seeing the fire in her eyes and the defiance in her posture, even shackled to a wall.

"Just like her mother!" He continued to laugh and leer at her half naked body as she stood before him only in bra and pants. "Your mother was such a wild spirit when she first returned to Russia and look at her now," His gaze turned to Irina lying bent over his desk, arms and legs spread and shackled, "A sad pathetic whore. I broke her," He smiled at Irina then Sydney with a lecherous grin, running the backs of his fingers down Sydney's chest and Irina's breathing picked up rapidly watching his disgusting hands on her daughter, "I will break you, too." His hands ran up Sydney's sides and palmed her breasts beneath the sheer fabric of her black bra, running his thumbs over her nipples and Sydney ground her teeth and her heart pounded rapidly in her chest staring into the man's haunting eyes and feeling his hands on her body.


	53. Chapter 53

_**AN: Graphic violence WARNING! But there is very important actions and words being spoken surrounding this violence that gives a greater meaning here. So if you can't read the violence parts, at least skim it to find out what's happening here between Irina and Sydney as its pretty vital moving forward in their relationship understanding. I am writing all of this with 'reason' not just for graphic entertaining in storytelling if that makes sense. I'm tired, so it may not. Anyway, the gist here is that what is happening is important in its graphic gory detail. Thank you so much to those of you who review. It means a great deal to me hearing your feedback. This was an extremely tough story to write, particularly these chapters. Thanks for reading and reviewing. You are greatly appreciated! _Wild**_

_**Music for the chapter (on repeat): Small Measure of Peace by Hans Zimmer**_

* * *

FIFTY-THREE

o

"Get your fucking hands off her, you bastard!" Irina's rage was taking over watching him fondle Sydney.

Cuvee laughed with a smile dropping his mouth to kiss with his hot tongue between the cleavage of Sydney's chest before pulling back and staring at Irina.

"You see, she 'is' your weakness Irina." His hand cupped Sydney's face and she tried to turn away roughly from his touch. "They ruined you." His disgusting leer brought a smile to his eyes and he walked towards the desk and Irina. He grabbed her hair roughly, ripping her head back as far as he could and kissed her hard, grinding himself into her ass. "You're looking a little blue my Minx…are you feeling a little sluggish? Is that why you aren't putting up the usual fight?" He laughed stepping back noticing the faint blue line forming around Irina's mouth. "The CIA really fucked you up and yet you work with them? Re-married your assignment and let him fuck you! Where is your dignity? You have no right to sit on Russia's throne as its ruler when your Satan's bitch in heat…ready and willing to give them whatever they want!"

Irina let him rant and remained silent, as she had no strength to put up a verbal battle trying to remain conscious. She felt a sharp jab in her ass and realized he'd just injected her with something.

"Can't have you dying on me before the fun begins. I want you to be fully conscious for this." He smiled, running his hand over her cheek and head. He shoved her dress up and over her hips and Sydney sucked in a sharp breath looking rapidly between her mother and Cuvee. "I love you in red." He leered at her body in the crimson red dress. He removed his knife and slid the blade over Irina's ass smiling widely when he trailed it over the blue tattoo of numbers and letters. He dropped his mouth to it and placed a hot opened mouthed kiss across her flesh, licking it in a long languid stroke before standing; his blade hovering over the last few symbols.

"You don't deserve these symbols anymore." His blade kissed the skin drawing a thin line through them with his knife. "You're in need of some re-education." His blade punctured further into her flesh and he drug the blade sideways through her skin etching out the tattoo and Sydney started screaming, _'Stop stop stop!_' with horrified eyes as he carved her mother's skin.

"Sydney, no!" Irina's shaky voice commanded as her eyes stare intensely at her daughter. This is what Cuvee wanted…he was using Irina to provoke Sydney, breaking her down.

"Look at that. no tears." Cuvee peered his gaze down at Irina with a smile, "You're certainly remarkable Irina. You see Sydney, as I said last night…" He looked up at the terrified young woman chained to the wall, "Your whore of a mother can withstand great deals of pain inflicted upon herself…but like you…she can't stand to see other's in pain…You can't stand to see your mother in pain…and she can't stand to see you in pain… If I," He slid the blade roughly across Irina's skin, plunging and ripping into her flesh again and Sydney gasped in horror, "Torture your mother…you're the one in immense pain…and she can't stand to see you in pain…You're the perfect weapon against her. So Irina, I give you another choice in this game of 'choices'…how will she be your weapon? You…" His hand ran over her ass and then ground into her with his groin, smiling, "Or her?" He looked from Irina to Sydney with a smile.

**_*A Small Measure of Peace Kashmir Theme*_**

There was no hesitation on Irina's part, "Me." She wasn't about to let her daughter be ravaged by this man. She had endured this torture thousands of times before, she would survive it again…

"Mom no!" Sydney cried out, seeing her mother sacrificing herself so that Sydney would be spared.

Cuvee's smile widened as the blade ripped up and sliced off the straps to Irina's thong and Sydney started to hyperventilate with tears flooding her eyes watching as he took off his jacket and undid his belt, dropping his pants; exposing his already hard cock pressing against his boxers from his sickening foreplay.

"Sydney!" Irina's intense dark eyes bore into Sydney's. She couldn't allow her to see this and fought desperately to keep her own tears back, "Turn your head and close your eyes! Now!"

"Mom… no…" Sydney cried shaking her head in disbelief this was happening, not wanting to see it but not wanting her mother to have to face it alone either. She started sobbing loudly when she watched Cuvee smile enjoying Irina's pleas and drop his boxers, exposing his throbbing naked length and rub it against her mother's backside.

"Sydney, now! Please!" Irina cried letting her tears fall with a pleading look in her eyes, "Listen to me-" She gasped loudly in pain as the last word died on her tongue when Cuvee plunged deeply into her dry, tight core, tearing at her flesh and making her want to vomit with the feel of him inside her.

Sydney was sobbing and unable to breath, shaking her head 'no' as she watched him thrust into her mother and pull out to viscously pound into her again.

"Oh God, you're tight, my little Minx!" Cuvee groaned in pleasure with his hands on Irina's hips, pounding into her deeply with his length, pulling her body towards him and stretching Irina against her already brutal restraints making her wrists bleed again. "Oh I've missed this…" He grunted loudly, biting his lip with ecstasy.

"Sydney!" Irina screamed, feeling as though her body was tearing in half and not wanting her baby to witness this despicable act being committed against her.

Sydney saw the pain and torment racing through her mother's blurry eyes and the pleas for her not to watch it happening and she turned her head, squeezing her eyes tightly shut and continued to sob as she listened to Cuvee's groans and moans of the pleasure he was taking in raping her mother.

"You always were…the best fuck…Irina," He grunted with a smile, digging his fingers roughly into her hips as he pounded her hard, "Such a… tight little box." He hissed in pleasure. "It's no wonder…why your precious…Jack…would take a whore back," His cock rubbed furiously inside her until she bled and his movement sped up with his new lubrication to increase his maddening pace. "How could he…pass up…your fantastic cunt." He laughed deeply between his grunts seeing Irina's tears falling as she stare at Sydney, whose head was turned into her arm shackled above her head, eyes screwed shut and sobbing harder as he spoke the demeaning words to Irina.

His hands slid up her sides and he ripped at the straps on her dress, pulling the top down under her body pressed against the desk and slid his hands under and against her breasts, grabbing them roughly and squeezing painfully making Irina inhale sharply from pain as her breasts were already engorged and sore from not having nursed Lena in so long. "And these tits…fantastic tits that…taste so good!" He grunted feeling his orgasm building. He leaned over close to Irina's face, his hot breath on her face, "Do you let Jack…suck on them…like you let me?"

Sydney sobbed loudly as tears coursed down her cheeks, her nose running and shaking uncontrollably at the monster this man was.

"What I wouldn't…give…to see…his face…while I'm fucking…his whore of a wife!" He moaned standing tall again at the thought of Jack's reaction to seeing them and realized he had the next best thing, "Open your eyes, Sydney!" He screamed at her.

"_No!_" Irina screamed back knowing he was about to cum and wanted her daughter to watch, "_No, Sydney!_"

"Turn the fuck around…and watch…you little bitch!" He screamed again, his face contorting into anger and he pummeled Irina with brutal force sending a shockwave of pain through her as he tore her more inside. "I swear…I'll kill her…right now…and fuck… her lifeless corpse…if you don't open…your eyes and watch…right now!" He grunted between his thrusts into Irina about to explode.

"_Sydney, no!_" Irina shouted her plea with raging tears in her eyes, not caring if he did slit her throat, she did not want her daughter to see this.

Sydney shook uncontrollably and slowly turned her head, hearing her mother's pleas but knowing Cuvee was sick enough to kill Irina and rape her dead body anyway. She'd rather her mother humiliated then dead and slowly opened her eyes to see a mad man slamming painfully into her mother and Irina's dark hollow eyes pooling in tears and then close, when she saw Sydney open her eyes to watch.

"I'm sorry, Mom. I'm sorry." She apologized looking at Irina's face and seeing the torture her daughter watching what he was doing…was doing to her mother…more painful to her then the act itself…was having Sydney there to see it. Sydney's body shook as tears rolled down her face, burning her eyes in rage and pain she screamed at him, "You fucking bastard!"

He kept smiling and grunting, groping Irina and pounding into her, obviously tearing her up by the blood smeared across his lower abdomen, dick and thighs that Sydney could see when he pulled out only to pummel back in.

"Sydney, _look at me!_" Irina's eyes flashed open and caught her daughter's horrified gaze at Cuvee and what he was doing, "Look at my eyes!"

Sydney obeyed and found her mother's intense dark depths, holding her gaze.

"Keep looking at my eyes." Irina pleaded trying to take Sydney's focus off what was about to happen. Not thinking about what was happening to her, instead concentrating on the fact that she was saving Sydney from this and that was all that mattered right now.

"Oh fuck, Irina!" Cuvee shouted loudly cuming with electric force inside her, screwing his eyes shut and continuing to pound into her, digging his fingers into her flesh, riding out the waves of his orgasm.

"Mom…" Sydney mouthed in a silent cry as her eyes flooded with new tears looking into her mother's glazed eyes and hearing Cuvee's climax.

Cuvee pulled out and looked down amused by the blood smears around his groin, taking pleasure in inflicting pain on her. He didn't bother to wipe it off, just stepped back pulled his boxers and pants up with a laughing smile.

"I'm definitely going to enjoy tapping that a few more times before I kill you." He leered and slapped Irina's ass hard, the sound resounding off the walls and making both Irina and Sydney jump and him laugh again. "So what do you think of your mother now Sydney? Seeing her for the whore she really is. Certainly not looking a bit like a ruling Tsar in such a position or anybody's mother." His eyes and head cocked at an angle, exaggerating his smile as he looked at Irina's position sprawled on the desk, "Just committing adultery on your father and their newly renewed wedding vows…" He leaned over Irina's ear, "Very touching by the way." He laughed mockingly lifting his head to stare at Sydney.

"She didn't commit adultery, you psychotic monster!" Sydney screamed in rage at him through her tears, pulling hard against her restraints, "You raped her! _I'm going to kill you, you motherfucker!_"

Cuvee burst into a deep laughter.

"Motherfucker,' yes quite appropriate, Sydney in this case, as the whore is your mother and I just fucked her!" His head dipped to Irina's shoulder and bit hard with a smile and laugh as his hand grabbed her ass equally as removed his cigar and lit it, inhaling deeply as his body still shook with laughter, plopping down in his chair and putting his feet up on the desk by Irina's body sprawled across the top and chained down.

Her wrists dripping blood onto the floor tiles and trickles of blood running down her thighs from the damage he'd just inflicted there. Irina sighed, closing her eyes as more tears fell hearing Cuvee and thinking about Jack and nauseated by the smell of Cuvee's cigar reminding her what he'd just done…again.

"My father is going to tear your black heart out with his bare hands when he finds us!" Sydney seethed in rage, spitting fire and pulling against her restraints ready to die killing the man if necessary. He'd killed her brother and her sister and just ravaged her mother again…she wanted blood, his blood and make what Irina did to Sloane child's play.

"_Sydney!_" Irina's eyes flashed to her daughter's with a warning tone, trying to get her to back down, knowing Cuvee was purposely provoking her, getting off on it which would lead to him ravaging her daughter next.

Silence was the best course, this she had learned years ago but Sydney was too much like her and didn't know that…yet.

"Your father…" Cuvee threw his head back and laughed, "He's a fool…for believing his farce of a marriage was real in the first place and then taking the whore back when she came begging…He doesn't love her…" He inhaled deeply and held it in his lungs, savoring it before blowing it slowly in Irina's face with a smile, "He only wants her for the same reason all men want her…she's gorgeous and a great fuck and nothing more…He's not going to want what's left when I am through this time."

"I swear to God I'm going to kill you!" Sydney ignored her mother's warning and glared at Cuvee with deadly eyes. How dare he talk about her mother like that…her father!

"You don't know the meaning of love because you're pure evil…but my father loves my mother and he'll come for her!" Her eyes shifted to Irina and then back to Cuvee, "And when he does…you'll be begging for death when he punishes you for what you've done to her…to my sister!"

Cuvee continued to laugh in her face.

"You are so much like your mother!" His mind was flashing images of Irina's fierceness when she first came to Kashmir after being extracted. "She spouted the same things about your father's supposed love of her when she came to prison twenty years ago, claiming he would come for her, in spite of finding out his wife was an enemy spy for the KGB… because he 'loved her'…" He laughed deeply mocking the idea, "And he never came for her…he didn't love her, he'd learned the truth about this," He ran his hand over Irina's firm ass cheek and winked at her sending a wave of nausea through both Irina and Sydney, "Traitorous whore."

"He didn't come for her because he didn't know she was alive!" Sydney was enraged at the man she knew was pushing her buttons and yet she didn't care what his wrath would be on her as long as it took the heat off her mother. "The CIA didn't tell him she was alive…because they knew in spite of finding out who she really was…my father loved her and would have gone off to find her!" Her blurry furious eyes challenged his, "I guarantee he'll come for her now! He knows she's alive this time and knows you have her!"

"Sydney, please…" Irina begged again softly, her mind in a fog as she was fighting losing consciousness from her wounds and lack of food and controlled blood sugar. Cuvee hadn't been checking her levels and injecting whatever he felt like into her…obviously not the right amount and just enough to keep her alive and she was on the verge of passing out.

"I love your spirit, Sydney. It so reminds me of your mother's when she first arrived here," He smiled with such enthusiasm it made them sick, "Your father may search but he will never see this royal whore alive again…when I am finished with her…You will witness her death as she witnessed her own mother's demise…and then, I will start on you…breaking you like I broke her." He grinned when his words got the intended reaction seeing the new stream of tears flowing down Sydney's cheeks. He leaned over Irina's ear, whispering loudly so Sydney could hear as he smiled, "And I bet she'll be a tight fuck like her mother…"

"Over my dead body!" Irina's eyes burned black with hate staring into his with deadly fire.

"Yes, Irina…it will be." He laughed and pressed his cigar out against her ass making her wince in pain and screw her eyes shut momentarily as he ground it in searing her got up and approached Sydney with tears streaming down her cheeks and grabbed her face roughly, kissing her hard on the mouth and she struggled against him and his other hand groped between her legs through her pants. "I've got to finalize the plans for our little trip tomorrow evening when I'm finished here with your mother." He smiled and cast his lecherous gaze from Sydney to Irina, "I want to get a couple of good fucks out of her for nostalgia before I kill her… slowly." He smiled and turned from Irina's gaze back to Sydney, "And we move on, my dear child. Without you and your father to distract her, your mother would have continued on in perfection. You don't have those weak links to bind you and hold you back. You Sydney, will be my next masterpiece." He smiled widely at her scared, stunned face before walking out the door and yelling at his guards in Russian to take them back to their cells for now, one at a time.

The guards charged into the room and let their leering eyes fall on Irina's exposed form for a few seconds before hitting Sydney hard, almost knocking her out and taking her off the wall and shackling her. Pushing and dragging her out the door. Her arms were burning in pain from being suspended by them for so long and her gaze never left her mother's eyes as she passed with blurry eyes and tear streaked cheeks.

* * *

Sydney was in her cell for five minutes, holding her pounding, bleeding head, when they literally drug Irina into her cell by her upper arms, her toes and feet dragging against the floor, as she had no strength to stand.

"Mom!" Sydney cried flying to the bars when she saw the state her mother was in, her dress had been pulled down but not up and her chest hung out and exposed for all to see and Sydney was instantly horrified by the mean, ugly bruises already forming on her mother's skin and chest from Cuvee's painful grip. Irina's head lulled and her skin was pale. "She's going to die if you don't give her something to eat!" Sydney cried out, screaming at the guards and hoping one of them would listen as they flung Irina onto the bed and slammed her cell shut, walking past Sydney without saying anything.

"Mom? Mom?" Sydney cried and flew to the corner reaching her arm around the bars and wall trying to find her mother's hand. "Mom, please…are you ok?" Her hand waved suspended in the air searching for Irina's. "Please Mom! I'm sorry…"

Irina heard her daughter's pleas, saw her waving hand and pushed her self off the bed, slowly dragging her trembling body to the corner of the cell, pulling her mangled dress up over her blackening chest with trembling hands.

"I'm sorry, Mom…please!" Sydney kept waving her hand frantically as her tears burned her eyes, thinking of her mother's sacrifice.

"Sydney…" Irina reached her weak arm through the bars and found Sydney's hand with tears burning in her own eyes, more upset that Sydney witnessed what had happened at the moment then allowing herself to think about the act itself. "Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything wrong. I'm sorry you were there to witness that."

"It could have been me, Mom! You let him…to save me." She sobbed unable to say the words and grasped at her mother's fingers, feeling her skin rapidly losing warmth, "Why Mom? Why?"

"Because you're my baby, Sweetheart," Irina's eyes flooded with tears and she struggled to breathe, "I'm your mother and I will never let him do that to you…never! I will die first! I've been through it thousands of times before…you haven't and I love you too much to let him hurt you like that."

"I love you, too." Sydney gasped between her cries, "Are you ok?" She asked softly, her heart completely shattered at the realization of what her mother had saved her from.

"I'll be fine, Sydney." She whispered, resting her head against the bars and closing her tired eyes.

"But you're bleeding. He really hurt you." Sydney sobbed gripping Irina's hand tighter and wishing she could push through the wall and hold her mother in her arms.

"It'll be ok." Irina bit back an exhausted sob, knowing from past experience that though the pain was excruciating, the bleeding eventually stopped…eventually.

"He's going to kill you…" Sydney whispered in a tortured cry, "Mom, he's going to kill you tomorrow!"

_'Unless I die tonight…'_ Irina thought to herself, before answering, "Sydney…I won't let him…he's so full of himself right now…he's going to make a mistake…and I'll get him…I'll get him…I just have to wait for that moment to strike…and then I am going to tear him apart…piece by piece…" Her glazed eyes burned in rage as her body began to feel numb…from her grief over her lost baby or her body being pillaged…or perhaps it was just from her lack of insulin…or maybe all three. She couldn't feel much of anything or think anymore as her eyes drifted shut and her heart slowed as her body continued to shut down.

Sydney felt Irina's hand go slack in her hand and she grasped it tightly, shaking it and pulling on her mother's arm in fear.

"Mom! Mom, you have to stay awake! You can't go to sleep or you won't wake up!" Sydney took a controlling breath realizing she had to be the take charge one at this moment if her mother was going to stay alive with her body shutting down.

The sound of a guard walking down the metal pathway gained both of their attention and he handed each of them a thick slice of Russian Rye bread and cup of water through the bars. He was the betraying member of her security detail and his eyes were scanning Irina, accessing damage knowing Cuvee raped her today and his guilt threatened to consume him. He refused to look in her eyes as they bore into him and he dropped a few pieces of candy into her cell, knowing she was diabetic and extremely low on sugar. He turned and left quickly leaving Irina with a thought looking at the candy in her hand; she knew Cuvee would never had told the man to give her…his guilt gave her that candy.

"He may be our way out…" She whispered to Sydney, unwrapping a piece of the pure sugar and placing it in her mouth, waiting for the instant sugar fix. "He was the member of my Security Detail who betrayed me…"

"That was him!" Sydney's eyes flashed wide on the other side of the prison cell wall with shock and rage.

"Yes…and he's feeling guilty." Irina added quietly, unwrapping another piece and putting it into her mouth trying to stay awake.

"How do you know?" Sydney asked softly, keeping her voice down in case someone was listening to what may be their' 'out.'

"He just gave me a handful of candy. Gerard would never tell him to do that and his eyes were scanning my body…not out of lust, but concern. He is feeling guilty, that's why he wouldn't look me in the eyes." She felt the sugar literally seeping into her blood and so slowly keeping her awake. She was an expert at studying people and only hoped that she could reach this man.

"Here!" Sydney stuck her arm out of the bar and around the corner, holding her bread out to her mother, "You should eat this…you need it more then I do right now."

"Sydney, no." Irina shook her head softly with a soft smile and sigh as tears flooded her eyes again, "I'm not going to take your food…eat it, please. This will be enough for me."

"No Mom, eat it!" Sydney waved the bread again with a determined look on her face that Irina couldn't see but imagined was there.

"Sydney…stop being stubborn… and eat your bread…" Irina sighed in frustration, "I'm not going to take food from my child."

"You're being stubborn! _Eat the bread, damn it!_ You're the diabetic, not me and who cares, if I'm your child! You need it!" Sydney sighed in her own frustration with her stubborn mother.

"I care that you're my child." Irina shook her head and the corners of her mouth flickered indecisive between a frown and a smile of amusement at her daughter's stubborness.

"Mom, that's not what I meant and you know it! I too, care very much that I'm your child, which is 'why' I'm worried about 'my mother' and want to give her my bread! So take it! Please…" She added softly, as her tears subsided and face stung with their salty tracks.

"Thank you, Sweetheart… but no…you're my baby, eat your food." Irina picked at her bread and stuffed a small piece into her mouth, wiping her own exhausted tears.

"You are so stubborn!" Sydney sighed, giving up and brought the bread back into her own cell, biting into it. "I know you've got to be hungry…you haven't eaten in almost four days."

'Hungry' the word echoed around Irina's head and surged through her heart as a torrent of tears flooded forth visualizing Lena sobbing in hunger; her haunting little eyes looking to her mother and begging her to pick her up and feed her. She could hear her tiny bones snapping and seeing her fall to the floor when Cuvee dropped her…the way she screamed in pain and Irina couldn't take it and lost it, sobbing and rocking back and forth with her head buried in her crossed arms, in spite of the pain the motion inflicted on her recent injuries from Cuvee.

"Mom…" Sydney's tears sprang forward once more hearing her mother lose it on the other side of the wall and not knowing what had brought it on suddenly, hoping it wasn't something she said. "Mom…what is it? Tell me please…let me help you?"

Irina only sobbed harder and gasped, _"Lena"_ in between her cries and Sydney's head fell into her own hands as she was assaulted with her own images.

"She has…to be…dead…Sydney, but…I don't feel it…I don't feel it…" She shook her head adamantly in denial, "But I know… she's in pain…and I…don't know what's…worse…thinking that's she's gone…or that she's still…alive…and alone in that…room…suffering…dying slowly…in pain." She wailed softly, gasping and shaking as she tried to get her breath back with he pain in her heart.

"Oh Mom…" Sydney wailed softly with her, beating her fists against the wall of separation in pain and frustration.

* * *

"Jack…" Katya called softly to him, seeing him staring into space as he watched Lena, knowing exhaustion was taking over him, knowing he hadn't slept at all in the last three, almost four days. "You should try to lay down for a little while."

"I can't Kayta, not until I find them. Not until I know that our baby is going to be ok." His voice was quiet and broken as he watched Lena's little chest rise and fall erratically. Her stable condition had dropped back to critical the night before and remained that way until mid-afternoon. It was now almost mid-night and she was still struggling to normalize her breathing.

"Jack," She put her hand on his knee, exhausted herself she let out a big sigh feeling his pain, "Lena's stabilized now and the doctor said you could take a nap in one of the rooms down the hall…I won't leave her side…I promise…but you need to sleep…You can't think clearly to find my sister and Sydney if you're exhausted…And you won't have strength to fight for them once you do!" She smiled slightly, trying to find the silver lining.

"Jack…" Weiss approached them softly from behind with Vaughn's mom in tow, "Kendall's on the phone…he wants to speak with you."

The young tired agent looked at Jack and then to Lena in the incubator and his heart broke all over again looking at her tiny broken body inside the plastic bubble.

The CIA team plus a handful of Russian Agents had taken over one of the hospital's conference rooms as their temporary base of Operations in Moscow while they continued the search for Irina and Sydney, locating and questioning anyone and everyone, old contacts and prisoner who could lead them to Cuvee.

"I will sit with the baby and Katya, Jack." Bella smiled softly and he nodded softly, standing and she grabbed his arm lightly, kissing his cheek as fresh tears welled in her already red puffy eyes, crying for the baby…for Irina and Sydney at the hands of the madman Mikhail had told her about when he first returned home to them months ago…Telling her of the horrid things this Cuvee man had done to Irina and now she and her future daughter-in-law were at his mercy once more. She took his seat in the rocking chair next to Lena's incubator and Jack followed Weiss out of the ICU.

"He's exhausted…" Bella spoke softly watching him leave with slumped shoulders and red eyes.

"I was just trying to convince him to lay down for awhile before you walked in…He won't do it…he won't rest until he finds them." Katya's eyes welled with tears, and she fought them back, sniffling and refusing to let her mind wander to what was happening to Irina and Sydney now.

"Michael is beside him self with worry…especially after seeing what this man is capable of doing if he could do this to a tiny baby." Bella placed her hand against the clear barrier separating Lena from the outside environment. "Sydney is his whole world." She cried softly.

"They'll find them." Katya reached her hand over and clasped fingers with Bella, "They'll find them. Jack will never give up."

Sophia handed Jack his cell phone and wrapped her arms around Weiss, seeking comfort in this horrible situation that she had just flown into from Italy.

"This is Jack." Jack answered in an absolutely deflated tone that shook Kendall to his core having never heard it before.

"Jack, it's Kendall. How's the baby? I heard she dropped back down to Critical over night and is now back at Stable?" His own emotions for the baby were raw with worry and fear.

"She's hanging on…she is her mother's daughter." Jack sat heavily on the waiting room sofa's edge and ran his hand over his tired face. "She's still not out of the woods though…and there are still no new leads on Cuvee and where he took Irina and Sydney…which I'm sure you already know."

"Yes, I just spoke to Weiss about it…Jack…you sound exhausted…have you slept since I saw you at Van Nuys when you left?" Kendall asked softly, hearing it in Jack's voice.

"No and I'm not going to be able to until I find Irina and Sydney." Jack snapped rapidly, frustrated and tired before softening his tone and speaking in almost a whisper, "You know what he just did to our baby…and you saw the tapes, Kendall…You saw what he did to Irina…heard her screaming for me to save her and… I couldn't then…I can now and I will! I won't stop…I won't sleep until I find them."

Kendall sat heavily at his own desk, rubbing his hand over his own tired face as his mind flashed to the images of Irina screaming for Jack on the tapes.

"Yeah, I understand, Jack…but you're going to be in no shape to rescue her when we get a location if you don't sleep and eat something."

"Every minute I'm asleep and not looking for them is another minute he has to torture them." Jack growled impatiently, knowing everyone was just concerned but 'he' wasn't what mattered right now his girls were and they were in grave danger.

"Alright, Jack, alright." Kendall sighed softly with his own frustration at the situation. "Devlin wanted me to pass along that he's informed the President of the situation…and will keep him apprised of any new developments. We've got clearance from the President to take any action necessary to bring them home safely." He wiped his hand over his face having never been more emotionally committed to a group of agents in his life and one of them was a former terrorist enemy…or so they thought."I'll be in touch. Irina and Sydney are the strongest women I've ever met in my life." Kendall admitted softly, trying to keep Jack's and his own spirits positive, "They're going to be alright. Everyone here is praying for them and the baby."

Jack sat in silence a moment, "Thank you…" He ended the call and put his head in his hands as his arms rested on his knees. Jack closed his eyes for a moment envisioning Irina's beautiful smile and their last moments together before she'd left. Lena's cute smile in her sleep that he'd taken a picture of just before they left…the smell of her baby fresh scent as he kissed her goodbye…his last conversation with Sydney over scanning Irina and Lena's photos for the search…her determination to find her mother and sister…He felt someone nudge his shoulder slightly and looked up to see Mikhail precariously balancing to cups of coffee in one hand and his cane in the other, his face and eyes just as tormented and exhausted as Jack's.

"I thought you could use something to recharge your battery." He held his hand out to Jack who helped took the hot drinks, helping him with them as Mikhail sat beside him on the waiting room sofa.

"Thanks." Jack handed him back his own cup quietly.

"How's the baby?" Mikhail asked softly as Jack's gaze turned back to the steel doors with Russia's equivalent of ICU written across them.

"She's a fighter…she's holding on." Jack sighed and twisted the warm foam cup in his hands. "She needs her mother." He added softly seconds later.

Mikhail swallowed hard and looked from Jack to the doors, agreeing.

"Have there been any new leads on where he could have taken them?"

"Still looking, but we keep hitting dead ends. No one has seen or heard from Cuvee since Irina stabbed him in Moscow last year rescuing Sydney…most weren't even sure he was still alive." Jack took a deep breath, running his hand over his head and sipping at his coffee with frustration.

"Jack, I know you're probably going to think I'm crazy for suggesting this," Mikhail said softly, looking over at the exhausted man beside him, "But knowing Cuvee like I do…especially concerning Irina…he'd want to torment her as much as possible," He swallowed hard as Jack's eyes turned to his, "Is it possible…that he's taken her back to that prison…back to Kashmir?"

"It's not crazy." Jack shrugged his eyebrow and turned his gaze to the woven blue carpet that still smelled new, "I thought of that too but while Irina was in CIA custody we had a mission there and the Indian government blew the prison up in an air-strike, there's nothing left but ruble. We asked a contact inside the country about it and were told there hasn't been any activity there since."

"Another dead end." Mikhail sighed loudly rubbed his forehead in defeat for the moment.

* * *

"Mike, how you holding man?" Weiss sat down quietly next to Vaughn in the temporary base ops in the hospital as they poured over Intel. Vaughn hadn't slept either and the bags under his eyes and dark circles were really showing.

"How do you think I'm doing?" Vaughn threw a frustrated glance his way before flipping the page in the file, "My fiancé has been abducted by a sociopath along with her mother and we have no idea where he's taken them or what he's doing to them. You saw what he did to the baby for Christ-sake!" His eyes lit with rage and fire, "If he is capable of doing that to a baby what do you think he's doing to Sydney…and Irina?"

"I'm trying not to think about that." Weiss gulped and looked at the table in front of them as Sark's eyes drifted towards them from across the table, hearing the conversation.

"You saw what he did to Irina in prison, Eric…and heard what he did when the cameras weren't rolling. His rage has doubled since then and now, he's not out to reform…but _revenge_." Vaughn's tone softened near the end with the thought. Turning his haunted eyes to Weiss, "We all know what's happening to them. No one wants to say it out loud…but we all know."

Vaughn was right, they all knew what was probably happening to Sydney and Irina at the hands of Cuvee and all of them were too reviled to verbalize the thoughts, as that would be admitting in some fashion that it was happening. As long as no one said anything, they could maintain the hope and delusion that the insane man hadn't sexually tortured them and wouldn't…that they would save them before that happened.

"And the truth is, without insulin for more then four days…" Vaughn spoke in hushed tones, swallowing hard with the reality, "Irina's probably dead by now…or close to it."

Weiss's eyes went wide in horror, acknowledging the thought in his head but it hit straight through his heart when he heard the words out loud.

"Jack knows it, too. Look at his face. He knows time is running out for her and when it does, Sydney will be alone with that maniac."

"I wouldn't give up on Irina so quickly if I were you," Sark voiced from across the table, refusing to believe anything other than her being alive. "She's survived many things in her life before this and I know she will survive this as well." His eyes challenged Vaughn's.

"I'm not giving up on her. I know what she's been capable of in the past," Vaughn felt deflated that his previous sentence had come out sounding like he'd just given up on Irina, "But her body's survival wasn't insulin dependent then…that's the unknown factor. That's something she can't fight or control. I'm just speaking reality here, time is running out."

* * *

Jack and Katya spent the night in the rocking chairs beside Lena's incubator with Jack reading over a stack of files with old Intel searching for something as the others searched from the conference room. His eyes stung from reading all night and he set the file aside to gaze at Lena. Her little chest was rising and falling in a more relaxed manner but still erratic occasionally with every few breaths.

The sight of her inside the plastic encasing, her little body so still and lying perfectly straight and stretched out was completely unnatural for her.

He wanted nothing more for the eye shields to be removed and for her to open her big beautiful dark eyes and smile at him with the same eyes and smile her mother had. He wanted to hear her small laugh when he showered her with kisses and feel her smooth baby skin. Hear her gurgle at Irina with her smile when she heard her mother's voice.

"We're here to relieve you two." Sophia smiled softly beside Mikhail, "Neither of you has left this room for seven hours with the occasional bathroom break and you taking a shower. Get up, move around…stretch your legs."

Jack didn't look too thrilled about the idea of leaving his baby and Sophia saw his hesitation.

"Please, Uncle Jack? I want to sit with her for a little while." Her big brown Derevko eyes, Irina's eyes, begged him and he couldn't refuse those eyes even if he knew it was a ploy to get him out of that room for a while.

Jack took one last glance at Lena and stood, grasping Sophia's shoulders and kissing her forehead and looking down into her now pooling eyes.

"Thank you." He gave her a small smile and she returned it. "If anything happens…I'm in the conference room."

Sophia nodded and took his seat in the rocker. He picked up his files and he and Katya left Sophia and Mikhail to watch over Lena while they headed for the conference room to get the latest information.

* * *

Vaughn pinched the bridge of his nose and rubbed the stubble on his chin from not shaving for the few days now, he was on the phone with a man in Belgium following a possible lead that sounded like it was going to be a dead end. Weiss was on the phone with someone and Sark was speaking on the phone with the Russian agents collaborating Intel.

"Jack…it's Kendall." Weiss held out the phone to him when he walked in the door.

"Kendall?" Jack spoke softly into the phone taking a seat in front of one of the many laptops assembled for the search, grids and maps projected on a plasma screen monitor at the end of the table.

"Jack…I just wanted to check in with you." Kendall looked around the Ops floor at all the depressed faces he saw working overtime to find Sydney and Irina. "How's Lena?" He turned his gaze to the numerous copies of the baby's last photo hanging around the office on Intel fliers with Irina's photo beside her. Sydney's had been added after her subsequent disappearance.

"Holding at Stable…still sedated." He sighed upset that she wasn't strong enough to bring out of an induced coma. "Have you gotten anything new?"

"Nothing yet, Jack. We keep hitting road blocks." Kendall eyes rested on Irina's gorgeous smiling face on her wedding day in the photo…and his heart pounded in his chest thinking about the Kashmir tapes and the fact she was in that man's hands again…Sydney too. "He's completely off the grid."

"We're running out of time." Jack added softly, kneading his fingers over the lines in his forehead thinking about Irina's condition and Katya felt tears stinging her eyes as she sat beside him, feeling a hand on her shoulder she looked up to see Vladimir smiling softly down at her. "Irina's been without insulin for days now…"

Marshall's tie hung loosely at his neck, shirt unbuttoned a few and his face was covered in a five o'clock shadow, his eyes began to go cross staring at the monitor in front of him when a beep caught his attention and his eyes flashed to the FTP server; his heart thumping madly in his chest as he read the encrypted title.

"Director Kendall!" He stood yelling and everyone stopped what they were doing seeing his enthusiasm and hearing him yelling across Ops. "I've got something!"

"Jack, Marshall just got something…" Kendall's heart began racing as he, Dixon and Carrie flew to Marshall's side at the computer.

"What did Marshall find?!" Jack's eyes widened and everyone in the conference room hushed and phone calls ended abruptly as Jack moved the call to speakerphone.

"It's a video stream…a video file." Marshall pounded feverishly to open the encrypted file; "It's addressed to Jack…from Cuvee." Marshall stopped with blank face of dread and looked up at Kendall asking if he should continue to open it.

"Open it, Marshall!" Jack commanded feeling his blood pumping at a possible lead. "Bring it up on our screen here!"

Marshall swallowed hard and pressed on, "It's the same encryption code that Irina developed at the KGB…Almost got it…there!" He hit a number of buttons and the file unlocked and began uploading on both his screen and the plasma monitor in the conference room.

The video image came to screen and everyone gasped softly and Katya's eyes flooded with tears seeing Irina in a room from an eye level tilted angle, showing her strapped face down with arms spread and shackled over a metal desk or table of some kind. Her long dark waves spread across her back, shoulder and arm, her face bruised and beaten, dried blood smears coming from her forehead and her hands and wrists tugging at her restraints making blood run down her hands and over her fingers, dripping to the floor. Tears could easily be seen coursing down her cheeks as she lay with her cheek pressed against the metal top.

Jack's heart stopped at seeing her alive on the feed in relief that was quickly turned to panic and anger at her situation.

_"Now there is a vision I see in my dreams." _Cuvee's voice broke into frame as he appeared through the door behind Irina with a leering smile, smoking. Jack's blood boiled, his fists turning white quickly, watching. "This seems familiar…We shall have fun today." He touched Irina's face and Jack cringed seeing the look in his wife's eyes."I don't know why you fight it…it only arouses me more…my vicious little Minx." His sickening laugh made everyone nauseous watching with baited breath."So…do you suppose that your precious little bastard has been completely ravaged by now…or do you think the rats are still feasting on her tender flesh?" He taunted her on screen.

"Lena…" Katya gasped softly, her eyes flooding with tears at seeing her sister tortured before her eyes for the first time having never seen, only heard what had happened to her before.

_"I'm sure that pathetic man you call your husband has traced the car Sydney arrived in by now and found the remains of your child. If there is anything left to be found…that many rats…its doubtful…just bones perhaps."_

"Sonofabich." Jack seethed in pure hate, "They think Lena's dead." His rage made his fists shake and Vaughn's breath caught at the mention of Sydney but she was no where to be seen on screen in the small room.

_"Which is more then he'll ever find of you.…Or maybe I'll mail you back to him a piece at a time."_ Cuvee hissed at Irina on screen with a lecherous demonic stare before kissing her neck.

"Oh God…" Katya had to cover her mouth to keep from sobbing hearing this man's plan for her sister and Vladimir grasped her other hand, holding it over her shoulder for support, disgusted by what he saw onscreen.

Irina closed her eyes onscreen and shivered under his touch in obvious disgust.

_"I see I still have an affect on you. You may act disgusted but your body doesn't lie. I can remember making you cum and scream with pleasure not so long ago."_ Cuvee continued his assault on Irina before them and made their skin crawl and his words like a kick to the stomach.

_"I was faking it every time you bastard."_ Irina finally spoke and Jack was relieved to hear her voice though she looked deathly ill. He could see the glaze in her eyes even from the distance between her self and the camera position was between 10 and 15 feet.

"That's my girl!" Katya spat out through her tears, glad to hear Irina's fighting tone in her voice.

_"And let me guess…your precious Jack is the only one who can make you scream his name?"_

Weiss's eyes darted to Jack's to see his reaction to what Cuvee was saying to Irina but there was none, just the same concentrated stare.

_"Well, I can guarantee…you'll be screaming his name again soon…but for a whole other reason, my Royal Whore."_

Weiss did see Jack's eyes flash with a moment of fear hearing Cuvee's last threat suggesting immense pain for Irina ahead.

"Bastard-ass!" Weiss's eyes narrowed and hissed out when they saw Cuvee put his cigarette out on Irina's neck and watched her face contort with pain.

Jack instantly could envision Irina's scar under her arm from where Cuvee had put out his cigar after raping her twenty years ago.

_"I think its time we teach Sydney a little history about her mother."_

Katya inhaled sharply as did Jack and Vaughn with the mentioning of Sydney and the sound of footsteps. She was drug into the room, shirtless and bleeding from the head and mouth but looked otherwise unharmed. Her eyes flooding with tears when she saw Irina, gasping out, "_Mom!_" As they marched her past and shackled her to the wall beside the camera to the left, only a couple of feet away so you could see her angled profile face looking at Irina on the right of the screen and Cuvee behind Irina.

_"This bitch is feisty!"_ One guard ranted in Russian wiping the blood from his mouth onscreen when they had secured her arms above her head. Cuvee was laughing as he walked towards the camera and Sydney.

_"Just like her mother! Your mother was such a wild spirit when she first returned to Russia…and look at her now, a sad pathetic whore! I broke her, and I will break you, too."_ Cuvee's hands assaulted Sydney's breasts and Vaughn's knuckles turned to white, his rage and fear matching Jack's.

"Oh God…" Katya cried hearing that he intended to 'break' Sydney like he had broken Irina all those years ago.

_"Get your fucking hands off her…you bastard!"_ Irina's eyes flared with rage watching the man assault her daughter, which only made him laugh and kiss her chest with his disgusting mouth, pulling back and glaring at Irina…taunting her.

"I'm going to kill him!" Vaughn spat rapidly and resolutely watching Sydney's jaw visibly clench.

"He's using Sydney against her." Jack realized with a heavy heart and felt the wind, suck out of him.

_"You see…she 'is' your weakness, Irina. They ruined you…"_ Cuvee grabbed Sydney roughly looking at Irina and Jack's fears were proven true. He inhaled sharply as did everyone when Cuvee violently grabbed Irina's hair and ripped her head back kissing her hard and grinding him self into her from behind. _"You're looking a little blue, my Minx…are you feeling a little sluggish? Is that why you aren't putting up the usual fight?"_

"This guy is unfucking believable…" Weiss was enraged and showing it._ 'How can she fight back when you're depriving her of insulin and have her chained face down!? You cock sucking maniac!'_ He thought to him self but didn't say as the thought went through most everyone's minds in tandem.

Irina was too weak to fight back and Jack's heart raced in his chest.

_"The CIA really fucked you up and yet you work with them? Re-married your assignment and let him fuck you! Where is your dignity? You have no right to sit on Russia's throne as its ruler when your Satan's bitch in heat…ready and willing to give them whatever they want!"_

Katya felt Vladimir's hand shake with his own rage hearing what the man was saying to Irina onscreen. She gasped suddenly when Cuvee produced a syringe and jammed it into Irina's rear injecting her with something.

_"Can't have you dying on me before the fun begins. I want you to be fully conscious for this."_

"Insulin." Jack breathed out relieved before dread and fury clutched at his heart again watching as the man forced Irina's dress up over her hips and Sydney audibly gasped in horror.

_"I love you in red."_

"Oh, Dear God…" Katya's eyes flushed with new tears seeing Cuvee produce a knife and trail it over Irina's skin…her prison tattoo.

Jack swallowed hard remembering Mikhail's explanation that Irina's tattoo location was chosen for Cuvee's sexual reasons and now here he was standing behind his wife, with her dress pushed up, her body chained down, knife in hand and leering at her, bending and assaulting her flesh with his tongue.

_"You don't deserve these symbols anymore…You're in need of some re-education."_

Their eyes widened in horror as they watched him scrape Irina's reconditioning tattoo off her body with his knife and heard Sydney's screams to, "_Stop!"  
_

_"Sydney no!"_ Irina's shaky voice interrupted Sydney's protests.

"Why is she telling Sydney to be quiet?" Katya asked confused and mortified seeing the blood running down Irina's side from the glaring wound he just made in her back.

"Because Irina knows he's using her…to provoke Sydney." Jack answered softly, with eyes never leaving the screen and his heart breaking for his wife, realizing she was trying to protect their daughter.

_"Look at that…no tears… You're certainly remarkable, Irina. You see, Sydney, as I said last night… Your whore of a mother can withstand great deals of pain inflicted upon herself…but like you…she can't stand to see other's in pain…You can't stand to see your mother in pain and she can't stand to see you in pain. If I torture your mother, you're the one in immense pain and she can't stand to see you in pain. You're the perfect weapon against her. So Irina, I give you another choice in this game of 'choices'…how will she be your weapon? You…or her?"_

"Oh no, no, no, no_, no!_" Katya chanted crying with wide eyes of horror at what this man was going to do to one of them and Jack's face went pale, as did Vaughn's.

_"Me."_ Irina answered without hesitation, sacrificing her self to protect Sydney and they all knew it.

Vaughn couldn't help but feel a sense of relief that it wasn't Sydney but was quickly pained that Irina was going to endure it instead to save her daughter from it.

_"Mom, no!"_ Sydney was screaming in protest, knowing Irina was lying as the sacrificial lamb on the altar for her.

"Holy Jeesuz…" Kendall gaped as they watched Cuvee smile and use his knife to cut what was apparently Irina's undergarment off, hearing Sydney hyperventilate as Cuvee took off his clothes.

_"Sydney! Turn your head and close your eyes! Now!"_ Irina turned her dark eyes to Sydney and the camera pleading and commanding Sydney not to watch what was about to happen to her and they all held their breath, tears forming in their eyes watching the heartbreaking exchange between mother and child.

"Oh Rina!" Katya cried softly as tears coursed down her cheeks.

Sydney tried protesting, not wanting to 'leave Irina alone' to go through this and then started sobbing loudly when Cuvee removed his boxers and stood naked and fully erect on screen before moving behind Irina and his shaft was hidden.

_"Sydney, now! Please!"_ Irina continued to plead with Sydney as tears fell rapidly down her own cheeks and everyone watching, eyes pooled and spilled over with Irina's last plea and gasp in pain when Cuvee thrust into her from behind.

Jack's arms were visibly shaking with rage, his fists completely white and tears in his eyes hearing Sydney sobbing as she and they, watched Irina being raped again by Cuvee.

"Oh my God, oh God_, oh God!_" Katya sobbed watching the man ravage her sister, pounding mercilessly into her from behind and the pain etched on Irina's face as her tears fell looking at Sydney.

Bella had just walked into conference room after leaving to get everyone fresh coffee and found them all watching the TV screen and her eyes went wide in absolute horror and dropped the cups to the floor.

"_Oh God you're tight my little Minx!… Oh, I've missed this._" Cuvee grunted and moaned on screen in pleasure and everyone involuntarily gasped for a breath when he jerked Irina's body back against him, snapping her chains as far as they would go and digging them into her wrists as he pummeled her viscously.

"_Sydney!_" Irina finally screamed in obvious immense pain and trying to get her daughter to turn away from where her sight was transfixed on the man raping her.

The pleading look in Irina's dark eyes evident to everyone and Sydney finally turned away, her face towards the camera and her eyes clearly screwed shut, still sobbing and Cuvee continued to pummel ruthlessly into Irina behind her on screen.

"_You always were…the best fuck…Irina…Such a… tight little box. It's no wonder…why your precious…Jack…would take a whore back. How could he…pass up…your fantastic cunt._" Cuvee grunted and laughed and Sydney sobbed harder.

Those watching in Moscow and LA felt like they were about to vomit with the hideousness of this man. Jack tears finally slipped over his cheek hearing the man use him against Irina, telling her she was nothing but a whore to him.

Bella turned and bolted out of the room to get Mikhail with her face colorless and body trembling.

Sark sat horror-struck and wide eyed with tear filled eyes and stained cheeks watching as Cuvee leaned forward and cut Irina's straps, ripping the top of her dress down and grabbing her chest as he drove his cruelty into her from behind making her gasp loudly in pain with the force he grabbed and thrust into her.

"_And these tits…fantastic tits that…taste so good! Do you let Jack…suck on them…like you let me?_" Cuvee leaned over her bent, chained body and hissed into her face taunting her with Jack…and Sydney continued to sob loudly, with blood, and tears running down her face with eyes closed tightly.

Bella on Mikhail's arm pushed through the doors in the back and Mikhail's face fell staring at the screen and what was happening to Irina on the video feed.

"_What I wouldn't…give…to see…his face…while I'm fucking…his whore of a wife!_" Cuvee moaned with a smile and everyone's eyes involuntarily turned to Jack in the conference room and Kendall closed his eyes momentarily looking down in revolting disgust at the ways the man was verbally torturing Irina along with his physical assaults and imaging how Jack was reacting to watching this.

Jack refused to blink or breathe, the blood pounding through his ears at the devastation occurring onscreen before him, his eyes never leaving Irina's on film and his heart shattering all over when he saw her close her eyes pushing out more tears with Cuvee's comments to her, tearing her soul apart with its venom.

"_Open your eyes, Sydney!_" Cuvee screamed turning his eyes to Sydney, wanting her to watch while he devastated her mother and Irina started screaming "_No," _again, her eyes flashing open to Sydney. _"Turn the fuck around…and watch…you little bitch!"_ Cuvee screamed again at Sydney, his face pure evil as he pummeled into Irina with brutal force, clearly tearing Irina apart with his savage efforts as her face was wracked with pain. _"I swear…I'll kill her…right now…and fuck… her lifeless corpse…if you don't open…your eyes and watch…right now!"_

"Oh my God!" Katya sobbed in horror, blinded by tears and about to vomit at the utter viciousness possessed within this man, knowing he meant what he said to Sydney…he would kill Irina and rape her sisters lifeless body if her daughter didn't watch him rape her.

"_Sydney no!_" Irina screamed in protest with raging tears coursing down her face, preferring death to having her child watch what was happening to her and everyone, including Kendall and Putin produced a new wave of tears at the desperateness in her voice and the look in her eyes.

Sydney was shaking onscreen, obviously torn about what to do but eventually turned her head slowly and opened her eyes to watch, saving Irina's life by watching.

Irina's dark hollow eyes pooled with tears and closed in defeat when Sydney had opened her eyes and immediately started to apologize…

_"I'm sorry, Mom. I'm sorry…You fucking bastard!_" She screamed in rage at Cuvee, pulling violently against her restraints watching him destroy her mother.

Irina's eyes closed, not wanting to look at her daughter's face while she watched her being raped by the vile man.

No one could do anything but stare at the screen in agony for Irina and Sydney in this situation that was horrific.

"_Sydney, look at me! Look at my eyes!_" Irina's eyes suddenly flashed open to Sydney's, trying to divert her daughter's attention away from Cuvee and possible danger to her self by forcing her to look her in the eyes. _"Keep looking at my eyes."_

"She's protecting her even now." Katya sobbed and sniffled in disbelief at how strong her sister was looking at her intense dark gaze, holding Sydney's attention with her braveness.

"_Oh fuck, Irina!_" Cuvee screamed as his body convulsed into Irina's on climax and Jack felt the bile rising in his throat; Irina's haunted eyes glazed over as the man continued to pump furiously into her until he was spent and Sydney trembled in sheer torment and pain for her mother.

"Oh, Holy Jeezus…" Kendall gasped when Cuvee pulled out and away from Irina and they could all see that he and his member were covered in Irina's blood, obviously causing her severe damage with his rampage and enjoying it by the looks of his smile at what he'd done.

"Oh Mikhail," Bella turned into her husband crying softly having never witnessed such cruelty, brutality in all her life.

Jack inhaled sharply, blinking back a fresh round of tears seeing his wife's blood covering the deflating dick, thighs and abdomen from his havoc he wrecked inside of her…His heart literally ached for Irina even as his blood boiled past rage into something he'd never felt before.

"_I'm definitely going to enjoy tapping that a few more times before I kill you…_" Cuvee laughed and slapped Irina's ass hard making both women jump and everyone watching a little."_So what do you think of your mother now Sydney…seeing her for the whore she really is? Certainly not looking a bit like a ruling Tsar in such a position…or anybody's mother…Just committing adultery on your father and their newly renewed wedding vows…Very touching by the way._" He mocked Irina with his words and stance…his disgusting smile, at having destroyed her in front of her daughter.

"_She didn't commit adultery, you Psychotic Monster! You raped her! I'm going to kill you, you Motherfucker!_" Sydney screamed in rage quick to defend her mother and pulling violently against her restraints wanting to attack him the way they all wanted to attack him now.

"_Motherfucker' yes, quite appropriate, Sydney in this case as the whore is your mother and I just fucked her!_" Cuvee mocked Sydney now and laughed deeply as he bit and grabbed at Irina more.

Irina was looking almost dead at this point, her skin pale, her eyes glassy and body bleeding as the tears continued to run out of her eyes and over the bridge of her nose, pooling beneath her cheek on the metal when Cuvee lit a cigar, sat back in his chair and propped up his feet in victory.

"_My father is going to tear your black heart out with his bare hands when he finds us!_" Sydney continued her defense and attack on Cuvee and Jack felt a mixture of emotions: proud of her defense of her mother and belief in him to find them and scared to death her mouth and words would end up getting her hurt, like her mother.

"_Sydney!_" Irina finally spoke in a warning tone, having the same sense of protection that Jack was just feeling, fearing for her safety if she kept up the defense and attack…provoking Cuvee against her.

"_Your father?_" Cuvee threw his head back and laughed, "_He's a fool…for believing his farce of a marriage was real in the first place and then taking the whore back when she came begging…He doesn't love her…He only wants her for the same reason all men want her…she's a great fuck and nothing more…He's not going to want what's left when I am through this time_."

Jack's heart was about to explode it thundered so fast and deep within him as Cuvee continued to tear down Irina even now and he was terrified of what else this man was going to do to her before they found her with his sick promises.

"_I swear to God I'm going to kill you!_" Sydney had ignored Irina's warning and continued her own verbal battle with the lunatic man smoking his cigar behind the desk and Irina with a smile. "_You don't know the meaning of love because you're pure evil…but my father loves my mother and he'll come for her…And when he does…you'll be begging for death when he punishes you for what you've done to her…to my sister!"_

"That's right, Syd, you tell him!" Weiss championed her on, feeling the same way and ready to rip this man's guts out through his eye sockets.

"_You are so much like your mother!_" Cuvee just laughed at her, looking between Sydney and Irina with amusement and lust."_She spouted the same things about your father's supposed love of her when she came to prison twenty years ago, claiming he would come for her, in spite of finding out his wife was an enemy spy for the KGB because he 'loved her._" Cuvee laughed deeply shaking his head, "_And he never came for her…he didn't love her, he'd learned the truth about this_," Cuvee reached out and ran his hand over Irina's ass and winked at her, "Traitorous whore."

Jack felt as though his heart was being ripped out in front of his eyes with the things this monster was saying to Irina. Twisting what happened in the past into his, own, sick mind game of tearing her down.

"_He didn't come for her because he didn't know she was alive!_" Sydney was shooting flaming daggers at the man, continuously provoking him and bringing the heat onto her self, "_The CIA didn't tell him she was alive…because they knew in spite of finding out who she really was…my father loved her and would have gone off to find her! I guarantee he'll come for her now! He knows she's alive this time and knows you have her!"_

'Thank you Sydney! Thank you!' Jack internally shouted, grateful his daughter was resounding the truth and reminding Irina of his love and that he wouldn't give up on them.

"_Sydney, please…_" Irina begged softly, looking as though she were about to lose consciousness and terrified that Cuvee would move onto her daughter if she kept provoking him…which only aroused the man apparently.

'Yes, Irina…get through to her, make her be quiet before she gets into more trouble!' Vaughn wanted to scream, thankful her mother was there to rein her back even if she was doing it with the best of intentions, he didn't want to see her hurt…see her sacrificing her self.

"_I love your spirit, Sydney…it so reminds me of your mother's when she first returned. Your father may search but he will never see this Royal Whore alive again…when I am finished with her…You will witness her death as she witnessed her own mother's demise…and then, I will start on you…breaking you like I broke her._" His declaration made everyone gasp softly in horror and watched Sydney's terrifying reaction to what he planned on doing with them race across her face with new tears."And I bet she'll be a tight fuck like her mother…"

The psychotic man leaned over Irina taunting her more with what he planned on doing to Sydney and Vaughn's fear and rage flew to new heights.

"_Over my dead body..._" Irina spoke in a deadly tone with pure unadulterated hate billowing in her dark eyes in protection of her child.

"_Yes, Irina…it will be._" Cuvee laughed stubbing out his cigar against the flesh on Irina's behind, taking pleasure in her pain and Katya sobbed, closing her eyes not wanting to see what he was doing to her sister and trying to stop the terror his promise evoked in her.

'Oh Irina…' Jack's heart and soul cried knowing she would go down fighting to protect their daughter and wishing he knew where the hell they were at so he could sweep them up into his arms and never let them go again.

The room was so small it gave nothing away to their location and Jack's track of mind was diverted when he saw Cuvee approach Sydney. He grabbed her hard, kissing her as he groped her between her legs and Vaughn flew forward in his chair, wanting to attack the man through the TV.

"You fucking bastard, I'm going to kill you!" He fumed in anger.

"_I've got to finalize the plans for our little trip tomorrow evening when I'm finished here with your mother…I want to get a couple of good fucks out of her for nostalgia before I kill her… slowly_." Cuvee promised death with his satanic smile and Jack's body recoiled with the torrent of emotions running rampant through it. "_And we move on, my dear child. Without you and your father to distract her, your mother would have continued on in perfection. You don't have those weak links to bind you and hold you back. You Sydney, will be my next masterpiece."_

"Oh God, Jack!" Katya covered her mouth with her hand, as they watched Cuvee leave the room and it went to black. "He said he was killing her tomorrow! When was this?"

"Marshall, how old is this? When was it taken?" Jack immediately snapped out of it and into action with the adrenaline to find them surging through his tired body.

"It doesn't say…it doesn't say anything." Marshall recited his findings flustered.

"Where the hell is that?" Vaughn whipped his head to Jack's and the rest of the table.

"I don't know." Jack narrowed his eyebrows in frustration, "Marshall, start it over so we can see the room fully before Sydney enters and blocks that part of the screen."

Marshall flew into action and started it again, Irina was there, bent over the desk but no one was in the room yet.

The door opened and Cuvee entered and something kept nagging at Mikhail as he saw the exterior out the door and then the interior and it all clicked.

"Jack, that's Kashmir! That's Cuvee's old office!" His eyes flew wide and he stepped forward when Jack's head whipped to his."I'm positive! That's his old office!"


	54. Chapter 54

_**AN: No violence in this chapter but a great deal of history!**_

* * *

FIFTY-FOUR

o

"I thought that building was blown up in air strikes?" Kendall boomed over the loudspeaker with anger that all these days had passed and they hadn't looked there, believing in what they thought they knew and their contact.

"It was hit by air strikes! I'm positive but, maybe part of it is still standing?" Jack's eyes flew back to the screen and his mind raced back to what Irina had told he and Sydney, "My God, you're right! Irina told Sydney and I that Cuvee used to bring her to his office when she was in prison to have, 'private sessions' with her, is what the sick-fuck called them," His anger was back full force, "She said he had special restraints built so he could have her on the desk or up against the wall…that's it!" He and everyone else looked at the screen of Irina shackled to the metal desk and when Marshall paused on the open door they saw the metal railing of the staircase, "And those are the stairs he'd push her down…shit!" He was pissed at himself.

"It makes sense he'd take her back to the place he 'broke her.' Which he keeps reminding her of on the video. It's his whole control and power thing over her. They've got to be there." Mikhail was adamant about it.

"One way to know for sure," Kendall sighed, "Marshall task the thermal imaging satellite over Kashmir Prison, now!" He ordered when he saw the man's quizzical gaze.

"But that satellite is occupied with military action over-" Marshall swallowed hard and Kendall cut him off.

"Marshall, just do it! I know what the satellite is doing now but the President of the United States gave us permission to do whatever necessary to find Irina and Sydney so re-task the damn satellite!" Kendall was as anxious as everyone else to find them and this was a major clue.

Marshall jumped in and began plugging in the coordinates and the satellite began to move above the earth, over Kashmir.

"Ok, it's on the move." He informed them and switch both screens to the satellite scanning as it moved in towards Earth on the exact coordinates and everyone held their breath.

"Oh please, God!" Katya, wiped at her tears on the edge of her chair, hoping for a miracle.

"We've got bodies!" Marshall smiled, and exhaled roughly the breath he'd been holding in. "Look, there are two here that are separated from everyone else." He pointed with his fingers to his screen at Ops and Jack and everyone else could see what he meant on their TV in Moscow.

"That's them…that's the section of the prison where the cells are." Jack jumped up, as did everyone else who was sitting rapidly flying around the room, ready to take action but needed to get organized and have a plan first. "Lena." Jack stopped and gasped, torn about what to do…his baby was still not out of the woods and in danger. _What if he left her and something happened to her? No, He couldn't think that way…_' He shook his head, she needed her Mama and he was going to go get her.

"Katya…Mikhail…Bella…" Jack searched their faces, hoping they would stay and take care of Lena while he went to rescue Irina and Sydney. "Can you please, take care of our baby while I go get her Mama…and sister?" His eyes blurred with tears and he held his breath.

"Yes, of course." Katya cried and threw her arms around his neck, holding on tightly. "Bring them home, Jack. Please, please bring them home."

"I will." He blinked back his tears and kissed her temple. "Mikhail." Jack paused, realizing that without this man's recognition of Cuvee's old office, they wouldn't be off to rescue Irina and Sydney right now. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me, Jack…just bring them home." Mikhail tried and failed to fight off his tears thinking about Irina and now Sydney in that former hell of a prison.

Jack nodded and watched the group assemble frantically. "I need to go see Lena before we leave." He looked at Weiss, Vaughn, and Sark.

"Of course, I want to see her, too. Before we go. She's our 'good luck girl,' remember?" Weiss offered him a small, relieved smile thinking about their mission to Africa where they all made it out alive, kissing Lena before they had left.

"I would like to see her as well." Sark spoke softly looking into Jack's eyes. He was Lena's big brother after all.

"Me too." Vaughn nodded, loving that baby with everything he had.

Jack pushed through the big metal doors and Sophia jumped to her feet with worry coursing across her face.

"Jack, what happened? Bella came in crying and took Mikhail-"

"We found them. They're in Kashmir." Jack swallowed hard, "We're leaving now but I wanted to see her first." He looked down at Lena and brushed his hand over the plastic incubator.

"Oh Thank God!" Sophia threw her arms around his neck, crying in elation they knew where they were. "I'll leave you alone with her…" She pulled back smiling, knowing he would want some privacy and was out the door.

"Hi my Sweet Girl," Jack felt his tears burning his eyes looking at her tiny still body, "I found your Mama…and your big sister and I have to leave you now, I'm going to bring them home." His tears fell over his eyes, "I will be back with them as fast as I can. Mama is going to be so happy to see you. So you keep fighting, and get stronger. I love you, Sweetheart. I'm going to miss you. but I promise I'll be back."

"Mr. Bristow," The nurse saw that he was obviously leaving and saying his 'goodbye' to the baby,

"If you wash your hands, it would be ok if you put your hand inside to touch her…let her know you're here."

Jack's eyes lit up and nodded, blinking back his tears and followed the nurse to the sanitation station, washing thoroughly so he couldn't infect Lena with any germs.

"It's ok…go ahead." She smiled and prompted him as they stood before the incubator again.

Jack slowly slid his hand in the circular hole in the side and into the warm space of the incubator, his fingers reaching out to lightly touch Lena's cheek, mindful of her various tubes and monitors and he gasped as more tears flooded his face, feeling her warm, soft skin.

"Oh baby girl, hang on. I love you, Lena. I love you." His heart ached for her to wake up and look into his eyes and he blinked back more tears, "I've got to go now, Peanut. I'll be back really soon." He touched her soft dark hair and pulled his hand away and out of the incubator, kissing his fingers and placing them on the side of the plastic enclosure before turning to leave with furious intent.

* * *

"Mom…how did Dad propose to you?" Sydney sat huddled against the wall dividing their cells, knees to her chest, sipping on the soda in her plastic foam cup.

When she and Irina awoke earlier in the day, they both had food waiting for them just inside their cells doors. Sweets really, and that simple fact alone, let them know it was strict contraband given to them from the 'guilt' ridden man who'd turned against Irina.

Each received a slice of Russian Rye bread, two cups of soda in tall foam cups, as the cans could be turned into weapons, handfuls of hard candy, and a pure chocolate bar.

Sydney had given up one of her cups of soda to her mother and Irina didn't refuse this time as she was parched with an insatiable thirst. The sugar flowing through her bloodstream had brought her to an awakened state earlier and was now wearing off apparently, as she began feeling fatigued again. She and Sydney had passed the last few hours trying to keep their minds off the situation they were in by sharing stories from the past, waiting for the footsteps they knew would come to take Irina away; hoping and praying that Jack and company would find them before it was too late.

The guilty guard hadn't returned to show his face while they were awake and their option of using him to escape was slowly ticking by with the hours of the day.

Irina sighed heavily, wincing slightly when the flesh wound on her lower back came in contact with a rough piece of cement in the wall when she moved. Her body was throbbing in ever place imaginable.

The pressure in her pounding head, overwhelming at times though she kept all traces of discomfort from her tone as she talked to Sydney…knowing with an all-to-real reality, that this could possibly be the last and only chance she'd have to talk with her daughter.

The cuts on her body were matted with dried blood, though every movement tore them open and fresh blood appeared. The burns on her neck and rear burned with a raw anger as the exposed nerve endings sparked with fire.

The floor was painfully hard to sit on with her torn up insides and she had somehow managed to pull the vile mattress pad onto the floor next to the wall to give her some kind of cushion. Her own knees had been pulled up to her chest, hugging them with her arms. She'd eaten all of her food over the last few hours and only a few pieces of hard candy remained, one of which she sucked on now. The cherry flavor mixing with the metallic sting she still tasted in her mouth where her teeth had collided with her cheeks when Cuvee hit her.

When she woke this morning to see the small mound of sweets, she couldn't help but think her 'last meal' had arrived, spoiling her with sweets just as they did both times she was facing execution in America; allowing the prisoners one last taste of their favorites before they were terminated.

"Well," Irina couldn't stop the small smile that crept to her lips thinking about Sydney's question, "Which time?" She chuckled softly and heard one come out of Sydney on the other side of the barrier wall. _'There was the proposal to her as 'Laura,' his first proposal to her as Irina, and then the last one…'_

"I hadn't thought about that." Sydney smiled with a soft giggle, running her fingers lightly over the swollen knob on her forehead where the split in her skin was finally matted closed with dried blood. "I'd like to know about all of them if you don't mind sharing?"

"No, of course I don't mind, Sweetheart." Irina smiled in spite of the pain the action brought every time through her wounded face. "Which was the one you were thinking about when you asked question?"

"I was thinking about the first time." Sydney rolled her head to the side, resting it against the cool brick wall and rolling her long twisted hair in her fingers, picking out the dried blood. "When you were 'Laura." She shook her head softly at the thought, "God that seems so weird now foreign to call you that. To think of you as that, I mean, think of you as 'only' Laura. Because all I know now, all I see is _Irina_…I look back on those memories now," She sighed heavily going on with shaky breath, "And I don't think of you as '_Laura_'…only Irina."

The two had finally and forever meshed together in Sydney's mind and heart and now were indistinguishable from each other.

Irina smiled feeling her tears well in her eyes at her daughter's proclamation of acceptance. Hearing' Sydney's full acceptance that she was always 'Irina' even if she was called something else then.

"It took me a while to get used to be called 'Laura' instead of Irina when I first moved to America." Irina ran her fingers over her lip thinking about those days years ago, "And then it took, a very long time after I was extracted to get used to hearing 'Irina' again…instead of 'Laura."

There were days, in the first couple of years after, that she had longed to hear her alias again. To get her identity with Jack back again; to have everything the way it used to be, even if that meant he never know her real name. She hadn't cared as long as he was with her, loved her again. He could never love Irina she thought then but he would always, love Laura. Irina was the spy and betrayer not his Laura…or was it _Laura,_ who was the spy and betrayer?

Sydney remained quiet on the other side of the wall, hearing the desolation in her mother's voice as she revealed her thoughts and feelings for the first time about her alias. Her reverie was broken when she heard her mother start speaking again.

"It was during Spring Break 1972," Irina smiled wistfully to herself as her mind flashed back in time, "I was 18 years old." She chuckled softly, shaking her head at '_ever being that young_.' "Your father of course, thought that I was 21."

'_Eighteen!_' Sydney's eyebrows shot up in shock as she mouthed the word in disbelief at how impossible young her mother had been when she got engaged to her father. Then again, she her self at nineteen, had joined a terrorist organization thinking it was the CIA. That thought still left her dumbfounded.

"We'd decided not to take the traditional drunken routes that still exist today, though back then, not quite as wild or popular, of South Beach, South Padre Island, or Cancun. We'd gone to Cancun the year before and your father spent the entire time livid with the intoxicated idiots that insisted on groping me whenever we went out," She laughed softly at the memory of Jack flinging men across the bar whenever they lay a hand on her smooth bare skin, clad only in a bikini top and sarong.

"Oh, I can only imagine!" Sydney shook her head giggling at the thought of her parents on Spring Break and her father's jealousy burning bright with her beautiful mother exposed to hundreds of drunk lusting men.

"It was your father actually, who suggested we go to Australia. I don't think he wanted a repeat of the year before." Irina ran her fingers over her ear, tucking away her tangled, blood-matted hair with a smile. "I was so excited! He knew I always had a thing for Australia. I told him it was because I had hated growing up in the harsh winters that were bitterly cold. Which wasn't a lie ,he assumed that I had meant growing up in Iowa, which was deadly cold in the winter as well…But obviously, it was the Russian winters that I was really referring to."

Sydney was smiling softly, enlightened to hear another example of how her mother had revealed 'truths' about herself even when she was under orders of fabrication.

"We flew to Sydney and stayed in a beautiful hotel right on the beach. In those days, it was far less crowded and urbanized and with the exchange rates, we were allowed to splurge. Your father was trying to make it as memorable as possible in every aspect." Irina twisted the diamond rings on her fingers with a soft smile thinking about Jack's romantic side.

"The first day we slummed at the beach, and I went topless and almost gave your father a coronary when he turned over in the sand and I was lying there with my chest exposed for the first time in public!" She giggled softly at the memory of Jack's face, which had gone white and then flushed red as his eyes raked her body. She could hear her daughter was enjoying this story as well, hearing Sydney's giggles coming from the other cell. "I pretended to feign innocence and moved my line of vision to the other girls topless on the beach, allowing his vision to see I wasn't the only one. After that, he took well to the idea." She rolled her eyes smiling thinking about Jack's eagerness to help spread her sunscreen over her bareback. It was the partially naked day at the beach that had led to a passion filled night that lasted until the morning.

This detail, she would leave out for her daughter…though Katya quite enjoyed it.

"The following morning, we got up early and decided to take a walk on the beach. Another one of your father's ideas as he'd had this little master plan all figured out a head of time." She smiled genuinely at Jack's ingenious.

"Wait! Is this the morning you guys took those pictures? That one of you on the beach in Dad's shirt they used on the cover of _Newsweek?_" Sydney raised her eyebrows curiously with a big smile in spite of the pain the movement brought to her bloodied, bruised face.

"Yes, it was that same morning." Irina smiled happily, flicking the hard candy to the other side of her mouth with her tongue. "That was taken by your father just after he'd proposed."

"No wonder you were wearing a big smile in that picture then." Sydney couldn't help but giggle, and wrap her arms around her knees, happy hearing about her parents love story, realizing it was that now, instead of a tragedy they'd thought before.

"We'd been walking along in the morning mist for quite some time, watching the sun filter through and break beams of light onto the ocean…there was definitely electricity in the air." Irina smiled warmly, rubbing her hands up her bare arms and feeling the goose bumps. "He'd been teasing me in our natural bantering way that was always flirtatious. He knew he was riling me up with his obnoxiousness and that was exactly what he wanted."

_She stopped walking with her feet planted firmly in the sand after his last comment, her blood coursing like fire through her as she watched him. _

_It took Jack a few steps to realize she was no longer walking just behind him and turned to see her standing still a few feet behind him, fists clenched at her side, dark wavy hair blowing in the wind, his white shirt covering her bikini and kissing the skin of her upper thighs. She looked gorgeous…gorgeous and irritated. _

_'Perfect.' Jack smiled internally, at his accomplishment. He'd had her just where he wanted her._

_"What? Why did you stop?" He feigned mock innocence like she had the day before with her 'topless stunt.' "Did I say something wrong Laura? What's wrong? You can't take a little joke about your stubbornness?" His eyes danced with deviance as his heart pounded rapidly in his chest preparing himself for the moment about to come. _

"He looked so damn smug standing there with his devilish grin and when he turned to start walking again, I lunged!" Irina laughed softly.

_"Argh!" She yelled as she came flying up behind him and tackled him from behind, knocking them both into the sand and sending them rolling one over the other as they fought for dominance. "You're so irritating Jack Bristow!" She squirmed against him and hissed through gritted teeth trying not to smile as he grabbed her wrists and held her flaying arms tightly, pinning her to the sand with his body as he smiled victoriously. _

_She could have taken him if she really wanted to, but she was 'Laura' and wasn't supposed to know how to do the things that Irina could do. _

_These were the moments she hated having to hide certain aspects of herself from Jack…Especially now, when she'd like nothing more then to wipe the smug look of his face at having her pinned down. _

_"And you're stubborn!" He laughed back, his eyes melting with love looking down at her flushed face, the way her eyes sparkled especially when she was irritated at him._

_"Pot meet kettle, Jack! Have you looked in the mirror lately?" She hissed, wiggling beneath him, secretly enjoying their close contact and hoping that this irritation, that always brought out her passion, would end leaving her satisfied in the sand. "You're equally if not MORE stubborn then I'll ever be!" _

_"Ha!" He laughed at her, seeing his plan was working when he looked into her eyes, seeing the passion starting to over take the irritation. "I don't think that is true but…it doesn't really matter. I love you despite being the most stubborn person I know! And you should know better then to take me on, you just, might as well surrender before you even begin." He dropped his lips to capture hers before she could react to what he'd said. Tense at first with the surprise, he quickly felt her melting beneath him, her muscles relaxing. His grip loosened on her wrists and his body relaxed. _

_It took less then a few seconds for her to slid her leg up his, foot planted in the sand as she bent her knee, quickly pushed off and launched him over, rolling on top of him, breaking the kiss with a victorious laugh of her own. _

_Jack's surprise clearly evident in his face though it quickly broke into a smile, seeing her perched a top of him, laughing and smiling at her accomplishment._

_"You should know by now Jack…when I go after something I want, I always get it. Never surrender!" She winked at him, smiling smugly herself, "Tackling you to the sand for your irritating ways was what I wanted, and clearly," She pointed to her position on top of Jack's body, pinning him to the sand with a smile, "Looking at our current position, I certainly obtained that!" _

_The 'position' was certainly not lost on Jack as it was one of their' favorite in the bedroom…or on the floor…the table…the beach…_

_"For the moment, " Jack said quickly and softly with a dangerous gleam as he grabbed her and rolled them once more, pinning her to the sand again with an enormous smile, grabbing both her wrists in one of his hands. "I know you always go after what you want, just as I do." His smile softened as his fingers ran through her hair, pushing it away from her forehead. Irina could immediately sense something had just changed and stilled beneath him. "And what I want is you…forever and always, Laura."_

_"His eyes locked onto mine and I felt his breathing change, the slight crack I heard in his voice and the butterflies danced madly in my stomach with anticipation as I felt him reach into his pocket." Irina exhaled slowly, swallowing hard remembering the intensity of that moment and smiled. "I knew what he was about to do and it was confirmed when his hand reappeared with a beautiful diamond solitaire perched on the end of his pointer finger."_

_"Jack…" She whispered softly looking from the ring to his eyes and back again as they filled with tears. _

_"From the moment I first saw you when we crashed into each other that day on campus, I knew you were it. I knew you were the one I was meant to be with for the rest of my life. I'd dated a lot of girls…and never, had I felt the instantaneous electric connection that I did with you when our hands touched. Never had I felt myself drowning just by looking into someone's eyes. Never," He stroked her cheek whipping her tears softly as his own eyes pooled, "Had I felt so inspired just… from sharing conversation. And never, had I fallen completely in love with someone when they smiled, when they laughed, when we kissed."_

_His lips dipped to brush hers softly and felt her tremble beneath him as she inhaled a shaky breath as he pulled back,_

_"You are my everything Laura…and I can't imagine my life without you in it. I love you." His brown eyes searched hers with a seriousness gauging her reaction with his own nervousness, "Will do me the honor of allowing me to be your husband, Laura? Will you marry me?" He released her wrists, and began pushing off of her body, allowing her space but she grabbed his shirt and quickly pulled him back down, nodding furiously with happy tears streaming down her cheeks, unable to speak._

"I couldn't find or trust my voice in that moment. I was so overcome with emotion I was afraid that I'd answer him in accented English as it was hard to keep my Russian accent from my English when I was so emotional." Irina's eyes filled with tears of happiness, and brief sadness at the thought of Jack of never being able to see him again if her life ended today. Her tears began coursing down her cheeks with thoughts of Lena.

Sydney nodded with furrowed brows in understanding on the other side of the wall, hearing her mother's accent invaded her English more and more now, especially when she was intensely emotional. Her eyes filled with tears of happiness for her parents, but also a bit of sadness for her mother at being so in-love with her father, as he was with her…but having to hold so much of herself back from him.

_"Yes? Is that a yes?" Jack asked, smiling hopefully as he looked into her smiling eyes, watching her nod, waiting for the words. _

_"Yes…" She breathed out barely above a whisper with a trembling voice and ran her hand over his cheek softly, staring into his eyes with her own, letting him see her soul. "Yes, I'll marry you, Jonathan." The use of his first name solidifying her vow, "Yes, yes, yes!" She began chanting happily, her voice rising with each yes as she broke out into giggles when he began kissing her face in rapid succession and then found her mouth, in a bruising kiss. _

_Jack's laughter joined hers as he rolled them again and again in the sand, kissing her with her head in his hands._

_"I love you." She focused intently on his eyes, willing him to see that she really did, willing him to remember this moment so that in the future when her assignment ended. He would remember she had really loved him. _

_The sad thought was quickly pushed out of her mind not wanting to ruin the happiness of this moment. _

_"And I love you, Laura." He looked deeply into her chocolate brown depths, drowning in the love he saw reflected. Irina's heart clenched briefly upon hearing his declaration of love to name not her own in this moment…and yet it was. _

_'It was enough for now,' She told herself and she quickly pushed that thought away as well._

"Is that where my name comes from? Is that why you named me Sydney?" Sydney smiled happily with the same curiosity she had when she was little, her voice full of wonder at being named after the city where her father and mother had gotten engaged. She had never thought to ask her father this question, as their relationship had been almost none existent until these last couple of years. Asking him such a personal question was out of the question until recently.

"Yes and no." Irina smiled enigmatically to her self, brushing away her salty tears. Sydney couldn't see the smile, but knew it was there, could see it in her mind and hear, it in her mother's voice.

* * *

Jack and the team of Sark, Vaughn, and Weiss assembled quickly after their goodbye's to Lena and everyone at the hospital and boarded the jet, immediately taking off to India.

The CIA and SVR had apprised the Indian government of the situation just before arriving and asked if they could please allow them passage into Kashmir. Mikhail had called upon his old friend, who was much surprised to find him still alive, and pleaded with him let the team pass through India into Kashmir. His old friend agreed to help facilitate the rescue and vowed to a have a helicopter on standby, ready for their use when they landed.

"Jack, how are we planning on getting into this prison? Isn't the whole reason you brought Irina with you in the first place when she was in custody, was because of the immense security measures?" Weiss voiced after they'd been in the air for a an hour and were talking strategy.

"Yes, it was. The interior security shouldn't be a problem now after the air-strikes but the entire facility, save a couple hundred of yards directly in front, is surrounded by landmines." Jack pointed on a geographical map on the table in front of them, "Irina had memorized the location of the landmines when she and your father," He looked up at Vaughn who was nodding, "Had tried to escape. She led Sydney and I back through the mines, this way," He gestured to the area on the map with his fingers, "And then into the prison through the sewage tunnels. Since we can't land the helicopter immediately in front of the prison without alerting Cuvee and the guards of our presence, we'll need to enter the facility the same way." He looked up at all of them who were nodding in agreement with weary faces about trudging through a landmine field…at night. "Agent Weiss," He addressed him in full battle mode looking him over and realizing the man was still recovering from his gunshot wound, "You will fly the helicopter and leave us here." Jack pointed to the spot just outside the trees where Irina originally began leading them through the field. "We will remain on Com contact at all time and when we have Sydney and Irina, we'll alert you and you will need to meet us here," He pointed again to the space directly in front of the prison, "For extraction."

As promised, the black helicopter awaited them when they landed at the military base just beyond the border of Kashmir and India.

"The three of us," He looked at Sark and Vaughn, "Will navigate our way through the field using landmine detection sensors which should take us about a half-hour to forty-five minutes at the most. Once inside, according to Mikhail and these plans, the main block of prison cells where he seems to be holding them, is here." He pointed again to the map. "We will be entering into a small office, here," He moved his hand again to the point of entry, his mind suddenly flashing back in time standing in that office when her first walls began to crack and she informed them she had been prisoner, not an officer, in the prison.

"From there," He suddenly snapped out of it, clearing his throat, "We proceed down this hallway, to the main block of cells…taking into consideration the building, has been bombed and certain areas may be unattainable. We will have to improvise once we're inside if need be."

* * *

"What does that mean?" Sydney inhaled a breath while already beginning to shake with her chuckle, almost afraid of the answer and she didn't know why.

"It means that…yes, getting engaged in Sydney was one of the reasons it was taken into account when we were thinking of children's names even 'before' we had you. When we'd just talk of the future." She couldn't believe she'd even allowed herself to think of such things and talk of them with Jack, believing at the time she was never going to be able to have a child with him. It was, at the time, her-own wishful thinking. "But also no, because we didn't want to name our baby Sydney solely for that reason. We both happened to love the name and it was different, not the Jennifer or Sarah or Kelly that were so popular then. Fate stepped in and sealed the deal with your conception in Sydney on our honeymoon."

Irina smiled, feeling Sydney's blush radiating through the wall of cement blocks.

"Whoa," Sydney held her hand up, even though Irina couldn't see it, giggling with that thought and information of finding out she was actually conceived in the city with her name. She had quickly done the math and it clearly didn't add up. "Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute! Back up here."

Irina couldn't help but giggling softly, leaning her head against the bars, feeling tired but amused by Sydney, even in this situation.

"How could I be conceived," She shook her head smiling, closing her eyes against the image it presented even though she didn't find it revolting at all now, "On your honeymoon? You were married in February of 1974 and I was born in April of 1975!"

"Yes dear, I remember quite clearly when you were born. It's something I'll never forget, likewise with the first time I married your father!" Irina smiled, goading her, knowing exactly why Sydney was confused but enjoyed stringing this amusement out for as long as possible, keeping their minds off the gravity of their situation and the loss of Lena; the pain was too unbearable and she couldn't allow herself to think of it if they wanted to have any kind of chance of survival.

"Mom!" Sydney shook her head, exasperated with her mother's tone and amused just the same, "If I was born in April, that means I had to be conceived at the end of July in 1974. Explain, please?" She added amused and just as confused as before, still not able to work it out in her head.

"I was still in school in February when we got married, and your father had to leave almost immediately after on a mission to Belgrade…there was no time for a 'proper honeymoon." Irina sighed, smiling warmly at the memories that flooded her mind. Naked skin on naked skin as they literally 'rocked' their little sailboat in Sydney Harbor under the Southern Cross in the brilliant starry sky. "So, we went to New York for the weekend and then in July, when we both had time off from work and school…we headed back to our favorite spot in Australia, to Sydney." She smiled warmly still feeling the tingle in her body. "We spent two weeks there and we also celebrated your father's birthday," Her grin turned naughty, "By renting a sailboat, and sailing through Sydney Harbor. And that was the magical night and, or morning as I'm not exactly sure…of your conception." She wasn't exactly sure 'when' over that 24 hour time period the actual conception took place but she knew for certain it was on Jack's birthday. "Naming you Sydney only made sense after that."

"Dad's birthday! On a sailboat? In Sydney Harbor?" Sydney's mouth dropped open, whisper-yelling in astonishment. Stunned and disturbed to find herself thinking '_aww how romantic_' instead of '_oh my God eww_!' Her lips turning into a slow smile with realization, "Well, your comment to Dad about rocking a few boats in your day certainly makes more sense now after Vaughn and I capsized the row boat in the lake at the palace." Knowing exactly what her mother was thinking she added, "Yes, I heard you whisper that to Dad."

Irina's eyebrows rose in her own private enjoyment of the situations.

"I was just trying to draw your father's attention away from the image of you and Michael in the rowboat and, its only natural you're so comfortable on boats, Sweetheart, being that you were conceived on one." Irina stated with a perfectly advisory tone, trying to hold back her laughter. "We are so alike, you and I." Irina smiled proudly.

"Apparently so." Sydney finally giggled, taking a bite of her chocolate that was almost gone. "Can't wait to tell Vaughn this story. He's the one who actually asked me how you two came up with my name and I had no idea what to tell him at the time. I certainly have a story now." She continued to smile and then it faded quickly, "You don't mind if I tell him do you?" Suddenly concerned that maybe her parents would not like people knowing. '_She would see her father and Vaughn again. She would.'_

"Of course not, Sweetheart. That is one of the happiest moments of my life. I'd never loved your father more then, only being surpassed with the moment of your birth." Irina's heart swelled with motherly love and pride. "You were absolutely created in love at its purest form."

Sydney felt like her breath had been stolen and her heart became heavy with happiness at the statement, another one of the lingering insecurities about those years, vanishing into dust with the absolute certainty of her mother's words that she was created in love.

"You kept yourself a secret for quite sometime," Irina lulled her head to the side, closing her heavy eyes with a smile, "I didn't realize I was pregnant until I was about four months along. I'd had amenorrhea frequently since I began playing sports heavily as a teenager, so I didn't think anything of missing a few periods."

"How did you finally figure it out?" Sydney asked with a soft smile, thoroughly enjoying hearing about these moments and understanding completely why a missed period wouldn't alert her mother to a pregnancy as she too had dealt with amenorrhea since she began training at SD-6. "You didn't have any morning sickness or anything?"

"No, I was never sick. I guess I was extremely lucky with that." She sighed, thankful, thinking about all of her pregnancies and there were many now, that she had never once dealt with morning sickness. "My mother never did either so hopefully that's something I passed onto you." She smiled softly, thinking about Sydney's future. _'She would have a future!'_ Irina resounded internally, unwilling to give up that hope. "I was tired a lot though, and suddenly found myself having a hard time getting out of bed in the morning for work and taking naps when I got home, something I never did. Then there was the insatiable craving for mangoes that was absolutely ridiculous!" She laughed and Sydney did too, thinking about the hordes of mangoes they saw stashed at her mother's home in Rio when they'd raided it, realizing she was pregnant with Lena. "My emotions were all over the place and I would just suddenly cry at anything, especially the Johnson & Johnson baby commercials." She heard Sydney snicker loudly at that and then giggle thinking about the mighty 'Irina Derevko' crying at a baby shampoo commercial.

"Then of course the physical changes that I started noticing, like I had to get up to go to the bathroom all the sudden in the middle of the night when I never had to before, and my breasts began to get bigger." It was Jack who actually took notice of that but she wouldn't mortify Sydney with that knowledge, "And then one morning, I just had this feeling, something that is absolutely unexplainable but in my heart I just knew. I was in the shower and started putting it all together to confirm what I felt thinking about 'why' I was being so strange lately and 'why' my body was changing. I placed my hand over my abdomen in wonder, fear and hopefulness and when I did, I felt it, felt you…that little firm bump that had grown in my body without my realization. I went to the doctor later that afternoon and confirmed it, heard your heartbeat for the first time." She wiped at the salty tears that she just now realized were coursing down her cheeks with the happiness of remembering how powerful it had been to realize she had another life growing inside of her for the first time, one that she had created with Jack from their love.

Sydney felt her own eyes tearing up

"Were you scared?" Sydney gulped, sniffling a little with wonder even as she smiled, knowing her mother must have been terrified in her position, an agent in the KGB, pregnant with her mark's baby and twenty years old.

"Terrified but thrilled. I knew absolutely without a doubt I was not going to let the KGB take my baby from me, force an abortion on me. I wanted you too much, I'd already fallen completely in love with you the minute I heard the first beats of your heart." Irina spoke softly.

Sydney swallowed the lump that was suddenly in her throat, hearing yet again how much her mother had loved her, wanted her from the very beginning.

"So, I devised a plan that would ensure I could keep you. I told my handler just into my second trimester, telling him your father had already known I was pregnant, lying and saying that I had been ill and he had been the one that had taken me to see the doctor. Told him that to terminate the pregnancy now, in the second trimester would be dangerous for my health…and arouse suspicion from Jack if I claimed a miscarriage because at that stage, the baby…you, were already big enough that I would have had to go a hospital and deliver you." Irina's brain short-circuited to her forced miscarriage of her son in Kashmir and deliver his lifeless body on her own. "Obviously, he was furious at me for letting it get that far. For not being more careful, for having Jack present at the doctor's appointment…etcetera. I was in serious trouble, this I knew. He was threatening me with extraction and that's when I started pleading my case that '_maybe we could turn this pregnancy into something positive,_' it would certainly solidify my relationship with your father, I told him. His guard would be dropped even further of suspicion if we shared a child together." She sighed heavily, which Sydney heard, thinking about the fact that even though she hadn't meant it, she had convinced her superiors that she was going to use their child against Jack and that disgusted her. "That to extract me for such a reason would be wasteful as I had already gotten so far with my mark, and the project I was gaining intel on was too important to be sidetracked by the matter of an unexpected…unwanted pregnancy. All lies of course but thankfully, he bought it…and started seeing it in a new light as well. He told me he would talk to Cuvee and find out what the decision would be from Headquarters."

Sydney couldn't stop the small tremor that ran through her body realizing that the evil monster currently holding them captive was the one responsible for allowing her to be born. The sick and twisted irony brought a feeling of nausea and could only imagine how her mother must have felt, was still feeling.

"I held my breath I think for the next three days, waiting to hear if I was going to be allowed to stay with your father…keep our baby. Thankfully, my prayers were answered and the bastard-ass agreed that I could keep you as to 'not disrupt my mission' but I was warned that my negligence would be noted in my file and discussed in detail upon my return." She breathed out quickly in a smirk and frustrated sigh, shaking her head, "Like I cared about that…Returning to Russia was the furthest thing on my mind then, I kept telling myself that if I didn't think about it, it wouldn't happen and all I cared about now was that I was having a baby with the man I loved and I was going to do whatever I had to do to stay with my husband and child for as long as I could."

_'Doing whatever she had to'_ later, turned into mutilating the bodies of people she didn't know in order to extract fellow KGB agents. These 'grotesque tasks' were assigned by Cuvee with dual purposes. To punish her negligence over getting pregnant and force her to do something horrifyingly opposing of every maternal instinct she may have felt for the 'bastard child,' and sending reminder after reminder that one day, she too would be extracted. He was obviously concerned, even then, of where her loyalties would ultimately lie in the end.

"When did you tell Dad?" Sydney's soft voice broke through Irina's thoughts, who was feeling nauseous with the thoughts.

Irina smiled in spite of the pain, moving to lay on her side on the mattress pad on the floor; her arm under her head as a pillow, trying to get comfortable as her aching body screamed in pain no matter what she did. "I told him the same day I found out, I was too excited. I couldn't not tell him even though I was scared to death the KGB would find a way to make me terminate." Her fingers moved up to lightly caress her temple as her head continued to pound. "I was so determined to have you, I was bound and determined I would not let the KGB take you away from me…and I adamantly believed it, forcing out any negative thoughts and concentrated on just being happy…and scared in the normal way parents are when first faced with the prospect of having a baby." Irina fell silent, thinking about her fears then for her unborn baby and now, for her full-grown daughter…her life still in danger from the same man she was before her birth. Cuvee.

"How did you tell him?" Sydney, slid down the wall, and onto her side, having pulled her own mattress pad onto the floor and into the corner in order to be closer to her mother, trying very hard to fill any silent gaps to keep both of their minds away from their situation and off Lena.

"Oh he was so cute." Irina spoke softly with a smile and Sydney could hear her mother's smile in her words. Hearing her father referred to as 'cute' was a jarring thought momentarily but now she could see it…in the man and father he was now, with her mother by his side, exposing parts of himself Sydney never knew existed until recently. "We had just laid down to go to bed for the night…" Irina began, her eyes closed, seeing her memory in vivid color with a smile.

_Jack emerged from the bathroom and smiled seeing his wife, already in bed, propped up against pillows, her hair splayed over their crisp whiteness as she finished grading papers, chewing on her lip in concentration over something she was decidedly trying to determine, if she should give points for being original, or take them off for being completely off point. _

_He walked silently to his side of the bed, and slid under the sheets and blankets. Southern California was certainly warmer then most places in the winter but the air still held a chill in the evening hours. He rolled over on his side, propping his head up on his hand to watch her with a smile. _

_His life had been fantastic since they'd said 'I do' and life as a newlywed in their big new house in a new city was intoxicating as was her new profession as the sexy Professor he'd enjoyed teasing her with for hours._

_"Tell me what your thinking, Professor?" He spoke softly, trailing his finger up the smooth skin of her forearm, causing her to tremble beneath his feather light touch. _

_She had been reading the same paper, the same line over the last twenty minutes with her mind on one thing only and it certainly wasn't the paper she was grading. _

_Jack had asked what she was thinking, now was the moment to change his life forever once again…_

_"That her name will most definitely have to be Sydney." She said resolutely, having learned for certain when she had conceived today. _

_"What?" Jack was completely taken back, not expecting her to say that in the least and completely confused as to what she was talking about. He watched as she put her papers off to the side and onto the nightstand beside their bed before turning back to look at him. _

_"I said…that her name will most certainly have to be Sydney now. Fate has decided it." Her dark eyes imploring into his, waiting to see that moment, that spark of recognition when he realized what she was talking about, "With your birthday…in Sydney Harbor…and her conception." And there it was the immediate flicker as her words set in and she smiled warmly with what Jack would always remember as the first time he noticed her motherly-glow. _

_"Conception?" He asked barely above a whisper, his heart pounding in his ears, unsure if he heard her correctly, not realizing until this moment how badly he wanted it to be true. _

_"Yes, we're having a baby, Jack. I'm pregnant." She held her breath, eyes already filling with tears hoping beyond reason that he was going to be as excited as she was, even if it wasn't planned and they were newlyweds. _

_"Pregnant?" Jack's voice continued to speak in hushed towns, afraid that it all might disappear if he spoke too loudly, in obvious shock. "Pregnant…" His eyes suddenly darted from hers to roam down her body to where her middle would be if not covered by the sheets and comforter. "We made a baby." He kept whispering._

_"Yes." She would have laughed at the stricken look on his face if she was not terrified herself, still unsure if he was happy or not. "On your birthday…on that sailboat under the stars. We made a baby, Jack…our Sydney is a reality now." _

_When his eyes remained glued to the spot of her midline she reached over and took his free hand, squeezing his fingers, desperate for a connection. _

_"A baby." He whispered again, his eyes finding hers once more in complete shock as his mind raced back to that fantastic night under the stars as their bodies swayed and rocked with the waves of the sea lying naked on the deck of that sailboat under the Southern Sky with the city of Sydney as the backdrop._

_"Yes." She said firmly, seeing he was having trouble believing it was real._

_"A baby."_

_"Yes." _

_"A baby. Our baby?" He looked at her mystified as the reality began sinking in and the corners of his mouth started to twitch upwards, indicating to Irina that he was indeed happy if he could finally comprehend it fully._

_"Yes!" She sighed with a smile, wiping at the stray tear that flowed over her cheek, "I realized it this morning and the doctor confirmed it this afternoon. She's due in April."_

_"She?" Jack's eyes were still wide in surprise and his voice carried the smile his face was adopting more strongly now._

_"I know it's a girl, Jack. I just know it. I can't tell you how I know, I just do." She said determinedly, having the same certain feeling about the baby's sex as she did this morning when the pregnancy realization hit her in the shower._

_"I believe you, Laura." He whispered in continued amazement, looking at her completely different now realizing their child was growing inside of her right now. She truly was a goddess, a body and mind worthy of his worship and now she was giving life to their love. "We're having a baby."_

_She smiled and nodded as more tears coursed down her cheeks. _

_"I am already four months pregnant; that's why I've been so crazy and weepy-"_

_"Your obsession with mangoes lately!" Jack's eyes growing wider with his own realizations, "And why you get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom…and why your boobs are getting bigger!" His eyes danced with laughter as she nodded and laughed softly with him, shaking her head 'yes.'_

_"I heard her heartbeat today, Jack." She smiled with a whisper and more tears coursed down her cheeks from sheer happiness and constant wonder that there was a little baby growing inside of her._

_"You did?" Jack whispered back, as his face took on a ghostly appearance, squeezing her hand in his and moving closer to her on the bed; a tinge of sadness flooding into his heart at missing such a monumental event. _

_Irina saw the flash of sadness dance across his eyes and moved her other hand to his face, caressing his cheek. _

_"I promise that from now on, when I go for an appointment, I'll tell you and you can come with me. I want you to come with me, if you want to come?" She was suddenly floundering in what to say, having no idea how he felt about such things. _

_Russian men were never present during appointments and were no where near their wives during childbirth, instead, they were celebrating 'early' by drinking and playing cards with other men while the wives did all the work._

_"No, no of course I want to come. I want to be with you. I'm just…in shock…I'm going to be a father." He shook his head letting go of her hand to scrub his face with his hand, trying to wipe away the shock. "I don't know how to be a father, Laura." His voice almost sounded panic as he thought about his own childhood and father. _

_"And I don't know how to be a mother, Jack." She shared her own fear._

_"You'll be a great mother!" Jack's eyes suddenly darted to hers, full of certainty as his voice grew in decibel._

_"I wish I could be as certain about that fact as you are and I have no doubt, you'll be a terrific father." She smiled warmly, her fingers moving over his cheek and under his jaw-line. _

_"We'll do it together." Jack said determinedly, "We'll help each other to become the best parents to our child that we can be; we'll be there for each other on this, just like we are on everything else. We'll learn, and we'll love with everything we have, deal?" He reached for her hand, scared out of his wits and he knew she could see it but the fear was equally rivaled by the sheer excitement and thrill. _

_"Deal." She spoke softly with a smile and he leaned in to capture her lips in a tender lingering kiss. "I love you, Jack." She was more in love with this man then ever._

_"I love you more then I'll ever be able to convey properly." He smiled and it reached his eyes, his thoughts rivaling hers. The thought of creating a life together, one growing inside her now, added a whole other element to their relationship and love for one another. _

_"Give me your hand." She commanded softly and he obliged, wondering what she was doing until he watched her wiggle down a little, so that she was still propped up, her head on the pillows, but so that her body was lying on the bed fully now. Flipping back the covers she pulled the edge of her nightgown up and placed his large hand over the round firm bump of her abdomen with a smile, seeing his eyes widen. "I can't believe we both missed it, growing so quietly these last few months without our knowledge."_

_"Our baby is in here." Jack's hand could certainly feel the firm protruding mound underneath her silky smooth flesh. His eyes flitted up to hers, dark and sparkling with absolute happiness, equally as enthralled with her body's new inhabitant as he was. "Oh my God, we made a baby!" He said in his continued amazement as he propped himself up on his elbows to get a closer look as he hovered over her, his palm lightly caressing the protuberance beneath. _

_Slowly, his head descended and his lips lightly grazed her soft belly skin, causing Irina to inhale sharply as another round of tears rolled down her cheeks at his gesture of absolute love for her and their unborn child. _

_His palm grazed it once more, then another kiss and then resting his palm over their baby in a protective manner, looked up to meet her eyes._

_"I love you." His own eyes glistening with unshed tears with the absolute adoration he held for his wife looking up at her in this moment. "I didn't think it was possible to love you anymore…but I do…you're giving me…us…a baby."_

_"I didn't do it on my own." She smiled and chuckled, pulling his hand up indicating she wanted him to come closer, and Jack straddled her body carefully, arms on either side of her as his lips met hers in a passionate kiss of promise and love. _

_The kiss turned into something more and soon they were making love with a gentleness that brought tears to her emotional heart with the way he was cherishing her body._

_In the morning, she woke to find him spooned up behind her, his arm around her body like normal but now, his hand rested softly over her abdomen and their baby growing inside and she smiled,_ _'He was going to be a great father…'_

"That next morning is when he began his morning chats with you before we got out of bed." Irina smiled relaying the story with a smile, enjoying sharing these moments with her daughter that seemed like they were only yesterday, and yet a lifetime ago. "He sang 'Happy Birthday' to you that morning which made me laugh as he sang to my belly."

"Dad sang to me in-utero?" Sydney's brows shot up in amusement with a smile on her face at the image that presented. Her parents lying in bed in the morning while her father sang to her mother's belly.

"Yes, he did it was so cute. And there were many mornings throughout the entire pregnancy, that I'd awake to find him talking quietly with you about something just between the two of you." Irina laughed softly, remembering one morning in particular that Jack's mouth snapped shut immediately upon seeing her eyes fluttering open.

To this day, she had no idea what he had been sharing with their unborn child that had startled him silent when he realized that her 'Mommy' was awake to hear. That moment had been her first encounter with jealousy over the budding new relationship between her child and husband.

Jack had shared that jealousy too, of course, over Laura's relationship with Sydney but both of them quickly worked through it and instead, became positively content with the thought of loving someone more then they could love each other. Which said a lot for the love of their child as their love for each other was such a powerful force, such a powerful union. Sydney only heightened that love for one another with their love for her.

Sydney felt her eyes rush with fresh tears, thinking about her father and the relationship that had began so beautifully from the first moments of her life inside her mother and had turned so tragic after the sting of losing her…

A relationship they were working on rebuilding and one she adored, hoped and prayed she get a chance to further…

"You knew his voice, almost as well as mine when you were born." Irina added softly with a smile that fell with a fresh wave of tears, instantly thinking of Lena and how she responded to just the sound of Irina's voice…and more recently, Jack's.

The sound of heavy footsteps broke the temporary silence and Sydney's breath caught in her throat as she bolted up, panic taking over when she saw the guard approaching her mother's cell.

"Mom!" She called out scrambling to her feet as the first man shoved the skeleton key into the cell door.

Irina has heard the footsteps as well and struggled to push herself upright, grimacing with her effort and turned to face the men entering the cell. Sydney's tear laden voice cried out for her mother and Irina closed her eyes, praying for another miracle. Two guards stepped forward cautiously and roughly grabbed Irina's arms, hauling her to her feet so quickly it made her dizzy and more nauseous and her stomach rolled violently.

"Mom!" Sydney cried out again as they shackled Irina and shoved her out of the cell onto the rusting walkway. Sydney reached her arms out as far as she could with tears streaming down her face, trying to touch Irina for what might be their last contact. "Mom!" She cried desperately and Irina moved quickly to stand in front of Sydney, her eyes filled with unshed tears and a small, brave smile as Sydney clasped her face for just a moment before the guards angrily ripped her away, punching her across the face and dropping Irina to her knees with another punch to her gut.

"Mom!" Sydney sobbed, dropping to the ground in her cell to be on her mother's level, still trying to reach.

"I love you, Sydney. I love you." Irina whispered looking into Sydney's eyes, not knowing whether or not this would be the last time she saw her daughter. "To the moon and back, more than the stars in the Heavens," The guards roughly hauled her up, annoyed by her continuance to speak to Sydney, "And the grains of sand on Earth, forever and always, Sweetheart."

"I love you, Mom, forever and always…I love you." Sydney sobbed, sitting on her knees with her face pressed between the bars watching as they drug Irina down the walkway and steps, across the aisle and through a door they hadn't taken them through before.


	55. Chapter 55

**AN: Graphic Violence Warning! But it's not for the entire chapter, so don't skip the end if you want to skip the violence!**

**Music for the chapter (on repeat): And it's timed perfectly... ****_The End, The Shadows Betray You, Rise all by Hans Zimmer from The Dark Knight Rises Soundtrack, O Fortuna - Excaliber Remix by Apotheosis, Hanging/Escape by Craig Armstrong_**

* * *

FIFTY-FIVE

o

As promised, the black helicopter awaited them when they landed at the airport in India.

Vaughn had just finished putting on his black field gear and packing his bag when he suddenly remembered something. _'Sydney didn't have a shirt anymore.'_ It seemed inconsequential to think about such a thing at this time and he had no idea why he had. He grabbed an extra black undershirt and rolled it up, stuffing it into his bag before heading out to meet with the others.

The fearsome group of four checked in with Kendall back at Ops and waved 'goodbye' to the Indian officers below as they slowly rose into the night sky.

Jack's heart beat loudly in his ears, overpowering the sound of the chopper blades as they whizzed over the desert below. He sat perched near the open side so that he could watch the ground flash by underneath them as Weiss guided them excellently over the rough terrain. His mind was swimming with images of Irina and Sydney, words spoken, laughs shared, promises made and life yet to be lived. Logic told him that Irina had to be dead by now but his heart defied the supposed truth. He didn't feel it and if he told himself he didn't feel it, then she wasn't gone. He still had a chance to save his 'soul' once more.

God had granted them so many miracles, the last being Lena surviving Cuvee's brutality. He only prayed, that he would be granted two more.

* * *

Irina knew all to well where she was headed when they took her through a set of steal doors on the opposite side of the prison. She'd been tortured enough within these walls to still smell her own searing flesh twenty years later. They moved her to the front center of the room against a wall and unshackled her hands just long enough to move her arms above her head, fastening them to a set of shackles in the ceiling, and her feet to two sets on the floor, one for each foot.

When the guards stepped back, one of them began cranking on a lever that lifted Irina of the ground until the restraints pulled tightly on her ankles, digging into her flesh painfully, and making Irina bite her lip to keep from crying out in pain, feeling the blood running down her arms from her wrists and dripping down her toes from her ankles. Cuvee stepped in smiled brightly, puffing on another cigarette as his gaze leered over her form once more. He nodded at the guards and they left abruptly. His smile widening as he came to stand in front of her, their eyes locking in a battle of wills.

"What are you waiting for? If you're going to do this just get it over with and do it." Irina hissed at him in a low voice, knowing full well that he planned on torturing her slowly and playing some sort of sick game with her before the fatal blow.

His only response was to laugh deeply, and grab her face painfully hard with one hand, squeezing it as he responded, "Not yet, my little Minx, not yet. Since this is our last night together, I want to make it memorable for all parties. Sydney will be joining us soon."

"Leave her out of this, Gerard." Irina couldn't quall the terror that shot through her with the thought of Sydney in danger. "This has always been about you and I…I don't care what you do with me…but leave her out of this. You're an ignorant fool if you think that Jack and the CIA will not look for her after I'm gone."

He backhanded her hard, causing the blood to poor from her lip and nose once more with a dangerous smile.

"I'm not the one who's the ignorant fool, Irina! You are." His hand reaching up to tenderly touch her cheek as if he had not been the one to just cause the damage there. "Throwing away your life for an illusion." He dropped his cigarette not bothering to stomp it out as he ripped down the top of her dress once more, kissing her bruised flesh with a smile and moving to a machine just off to the side.

"The only illusion I ever threw my life away for was the KGB." She resounded with a tone like ice; remembering the ideals on which she had first joined as a young girl being thrown back at her violently when she was ripped away from her family, her mother murdered and sentenced to treason.

Cuvee cocked a surprised eyebrow at her brash statement.

"That's right." She dared him to look anywhere but in her eyes seeing his surprise in her statement, despite knowing the ungodly pain she was about to experience, "Twenty years ago you brought me here and tortured me after I had served in blind faith for over a decade. I begged and pleaded with you that I was still loyal to my country and my agency. This time, you what? Want me to plead for my life, for that of my daughters?" Her eyes glazed over with hate and restlessness. "We both understand each other enough to know that no matter how much I plead, I am not leaving this room today." She continued her defiance.

If her life was going to be taken, it was going to be taken on her term. She would not allow him the pleasure of begging and pleading with him, or crying out in pain when he committed his acts against her body. He may have that, but he would not take her soul.

Gathering a hand full of electrodes he began systematically placing them over her chest, ribs, neck, temples, stomach and arms. The silence hung deafening between them.

"Do what you will to me. This time, you can't take away the love for my family or their love for me." She hissed in a deadly whisper, her eyes unyielding with their challenge when he stepped back, hitting the power switch and the machine hummed to life. "Jack will come, I guarantee you, he will come." She knew in her heart that he would, "And if its too late for me, he won't stop until he finds Sydney and there will be no place on Earth, that you will be able to hide and seek refuge from his wrath. He will destroy you and in the end, it will be you, Gerard, begging for your life."

"Come for you, Irina?" He laughed viscously, turning up the dial of the electrical currents. "I doubt that. You see," He stepped forward, trailing his finger down her bare chest and circling her puckered nipple in the coolness of the room the a lecherous smile. "Your precious Jack is probably sitting down about now to watch his whore of a wife getting fucked by a real man on the nice little video I sent him of yesterday. Right now, he's seeing you for the whore you really are. That will be the last image of you imprinted on his mind forever. You bent over a desk getting fucked by me."

Irina's breath sucked in sharply and her eyes went wide with the knowledge in spite of trying to keep her emotions guarded.

"You're a sick bastard." She felt like vomiting as her stomach continued to roll.

"He'll be too devastated at relearning his wife's true nature in life to worry about finding you or your bastard offspring and when he comes out of his shock, it will be too late for him to find her." Cuvee taunted her with his twisted words.

"You underestimate my husband; you've always underestimated my husband." Irina's faith in Jack rang true, "And that will be your downfall."

"No, my little Minx," He caressed her face with his fingers and stood back smiling, hand on dial, "He will be yours." And with his menacing glare he pressed the button and sent a wave of electrical current straight through Irina's body.

The pain was like a tidal wave slamming into her full-force and she clenched her teeth and screwed her eyes shut as the torrent of pain ripped through every cell in her body, making her flail mercilessly against her restraints in agony until a primal scream sprang from her body and he released the button. Her breath stolen, it took moments to remember how to inhale and breathe and when it did came in a loud gasp. He allowed just a few seconds to pass before, moving up the dial, pressing the button again, making Irina's face contort into a silent scream, as her body spasm and convulsed against the electrical assault.

"_Stop!_" Sydney's scream as they drug her through the doorway, seeing her mother in torture barely registered in Irina's mind with the sound of her own heart echoing in her ears. It's erratic beats drowning out all other sound. Sydney fought valiantly against the guards the best she could trying to get to her mother but was brought to her knees with a tazzer in her side.

Irina was powerless to stop her body's reaction and the surge of pain forced all the contents of her stomach to expel at a horrendous force, vomiting until she dry-heaved and only then did Cuvee release the button with a maniacal grin.

"We're just getting started." He smiled watching Irina gasp loudly again and her body tremble as she hung from the chains, her chest heaving in an effort to force air into her lungs.

_***The End***_

Weiss landed them safely at the drop point and wished them 'good luck' when they set off into the trees. The lack of any light source made it that much more dangerous and time-consuming. Hitting the edge of the clearing, Jack held his arms out to stop Vaughn and Sark from taking another step, remembering this was the spot Irina had told them the mines began.

"Stop! Don't take another step." He said quietly and both Vaughn and Sark froze in position. "This is where she said the mines began." He pulled the landmine locator out of his vest and flipped on the switch, the blue illumination lights casting an aqua glow onto his face and flooding onto theirs.'

The field before them was now a square diagram with geographical information and every tiny red dot was a mine…and there were hundreds from this spot to the sewage tunnel.

"Oh geezus," Vaughn breathed out looking at the hundreds of dots before them on the screen, and then to the blackened field before them. "How the hell did she memorize all of those locations?" He asked completely flabbergasted at Irina's mind capabilities. "And remember them twenty years later?" He asked the question Jack had asked of her once too, unbelieving that her she could possibly remember. It was only when he realized 'why' she had memorized them in the first place, that he understood 'how' she could have remembered them all those years later.

"She's a genius, an unbelievable genius with a photographic memory." Sark felt a swell of pride for Irina march into his voice.

"Yeah, but look at all of them; to memorize the exact location of each, how many steps between. How could she do that?" Vaughn was still amazed and baffled and realized he was standing before the spot in which his father lost his leg, and almost his life.

"Desperation for freedom from hell, Agent Vaughn." Jack said firmly yet quietly, turning to find the younger man's eyes, "Her life and your fathers' depended on it."

Vaughn gulped, nodding in understanding. _'And after learning of its importance, not likely something she'd ever forget…'_ He realized.

"Follow me. Single file line." Jack instructed and set out into the field of hidden, black death.

"You psychotic bastard-ass sonofabitch!" Sydney screamed in rage and tears at him when she was grabbed roughly and thrown onto the metal table in the center of the room, facing her mother.

Sydney's voice was slowly seeping through the electric fog in Irina's brain and she struggled stop trembling, and gasping for breath long enough to find and focus on her daughter.

Sydney kept up her fighting as they strapped her arms and legs down to the cold steel platform, thinking nothing of what was happening to her and more concerned with the form of her mother, hanging from the ceiling and stretched painfully against her restraints, blood coursing down her face once more and her body trembling uncontrollably. The bruises running large maps all over her mother's body were a sickening black from yesterday's beatings. The fact that the pain was so intense it caused Irina's body to vomit in the process, unbearable to think about.

"Hello Sydney." Cuvee turned him sights from Irina to her daughter. The guards had firmly secured her to the table and one of them was now pushing in the torture cart with the squeaky wheel.

It was that noise, that reminder of the past that finally broke through the fog and brought Irina's head up to meet her daughter's position, lying on the torture table in front of her.

"Leave her alone!" Sydney cried, still struggling against the leather straps that held her down.

"For the moment…" Cuvee smiled, replying in an all too-high voice with his evil intentions shining through, as he folded back the white linen covering his barrage of torture devices on the table. "So how is it, Sydney? Seeing your mother for what she really is now?" His smile of malevolence reaching his eyes when he reached for series of long needles, "Look around you…" He gestured with his hands to the hideous dark room, which still smelt of fried flesh, blood, urine, feces, and most recently, Irina's vomit, even after all of these years.

It wasn't hard to guess that this room had been the ultimate breaking point for many prisoners who were left to die in their own bodily fluids after the KGB extracted what they wanted.

"Your mother spent a great deal of time in this very room twenty years ago when she betrayed her country in favor of the enemy." He menacing eyes defied the smile lit across his face when he looked pointedly back at Sydney, "Her obstinate stubborn fire was unwilling to break at first…but eventually, I wore her down in this very room." His hand trailed up the exposed skin of Sydney's abdomen with a look of pure lust that made Sydney want to vomit as well. "And soon, she was 'begging' for it. I've no doubt, you'll be the same."

"I'd rather die then give myself to you!" She spat in his face, saying almost the exact words, doing almost the exact same thing Irina had done when she first came to Kashmir…doing it all, unconscious of the fact.

Cuvee only laughed and wiped the spit from his cheek shaking his head in amusement as he recognized the move and words immediately.

"I recall your mother saying the same thing and look at her now," He turned his head back to glance at Irina, bloodied, bruised and trembling chained to the ceiling and floor. "She's dying and I am still going to take her."

"You're disgusting." Sydney hissed at him, fear gripping her heart for her mother, seeing Irina struggling to remain conscious after the last torrent of electricity ripped though her body.

"Sydney…" Irina gasped out, trying desperately to shake the lingering cobwebs from her head. "Don't…" She pleaded with her daughter once more, trying to steer her clear of Cuvee's traps. She would rather be tortured to death if that meant Sydney would have a few more hours for a chance at escape or rescue.

"Whatever you do to me…will not take away my love for my mother. You have nothing left to manipulate me with…nothing." Sydney acknowledged what her mother was trying to do yet again, and would not allow it anymore. She would not let her mother go down without fighting for her, no matter what she would then face in the end. "You manipulated her twenty years ago with my father because of the mission and the situation and I and I'm telling you, it won't work now with me. There are no secrets, no lies between us. I love her unconditionally as she loves me. You'll never be able to take that from either of us…ever." Her eyes had drifted to her mother's and both had unshed tears rimming on their lids. Her soft gaze turned back to granite as she looked back into Cuvee's beady eyes. "You'll never be able to sever the bond we share…if the twenty year gap didn't prove that to you, nothing will. You may break my body and my mind in the end but you will never break my heart. Just like you never really broke hers and 'that's what makes you so angry, is that 'you' failed…not my mother." Her dangerous words hit something inside Cuvee as his eyes glazed over with a murderous tone and he slid the first long needle into her neck making Sydney gasp and scream in pain.

Irina's heart was shattering first at Sydney's words and now with her daughter's pain as Cuvee began his torture upon her body, sliding needle after needle into her pressure points and then underneath her fingernails…each one eliciting an ear-piercing scream from Sydney. The excruciating pain continued for another twenty minutes before he ran out of needles and she almost passed out and then, he grabbed a bucket of ice water out of nowhere and dowsed Sydney with it, shocking her system and making her sputter with the violent reaction.

Smiling he removed the needles and pulled a flame torch from the cart and using his lit cigarette to ignite the flame with a cancerous smile as he twisted the gauge to extend the flame to the length he wanted and Sydney's eyes went wide, recognizing this from her mother's tapes.

"We're going to play another little game." He pulled the cart over closer to him and his hand held over the button that if pressed, would send another round of current through Irina. The flame torch held near the base of Sydney's foot. "I'm going to electrocute 'Mommy' until she screams and when she does, I'm going release her and torch you and when you scream, I'll give you a short reprieve and go back to shocking her until she screams and so on…" His smile widened as Sydney's eyes went wide with horror.

"She'll die if you keep shocking her!" She realized that the flames would sear her flesh but not kill her…but the electricity would eventually kill her mother.

"Then you best try _very hard_, Sydney, to hold in your screams as much as possible." He winked at her, placing the blame in her lap if Irina's electrocution killed her.

Irina had no time to react before another course of electricity raged through her entire body, making her convulse and wither against the restraints and bounce off the wall. Irina was trying so hard not to scream out in pain for as long as possible, her teeth clenched in spite of the flow of pain ripping through her face with the electrodes there. She held out for about thirty seconds on the verge of passing out before she couldn't stop it anymore and screamed in suffering, hating herself for her lack of control, knowing the minute the scream left her body, Sydney would be torched.

Cuvee smiled happily as his finger left the button, impressed that Irina had held out that long and turned his torch to kiss the bottom of Sydney's foot. The immediate smell of burning flesh filled the room and Irina began dry heaving once more while Sydney ripped as hard as she could against her restraints trying to hold back the scream of sheer torture. The fire exposing and burning all of her nerves and she couldn't fight it long, only fifteen seconds or so before the ragged scream left her mouth and the flame was pulled away. Irina's body started convulsing again immediately as tears ran rivers down Sydney's cheeks, begging her mother to scream before she died.

Irina hadn't been prepared for the next wave to hit and when it did, she involuntarily clamped down onto the side of her tongue and unable to pry her teeth off of it as the muscles in her jaw continued to clench with the ruthless electric current. Blood pooling in her mouth and threatening to suffocate her she finally released and held out about twenty five seconds before she screamed, blood spilling forth from her mouth with a gush and down her chin.

Cuvee moved back to torch the sole of Sydney's foot once again and the bubbled, bleeding flesh began to sizzle once more, the scream came forth much more quickly this time as the blue flame licked at the muscle and no amount of jaw clenching could hold back her bellow of pain. Irina had been prepared this time in spite of clinging to the edge of consciousness by her nails and was more determined then ever to hold out as long as possible.

The violent currents shattered through her body until it could take it no more and her head fell forwards following the flash of light into the abyss of darkness, the jumping of her body almost instantaneously ceasing with the exception of a few small involuntary jerks and Sydney's scream filled the room for her seeing Irina slump.

"_You killed her!_" She screamed through ragged gasps of breath. "_You killed her, you fucking bastard!_"

Jack breathed out heavily in relief, "We're clear." Looked over his shoulder and informed the two younger agents when they had cleared the mines and stood in front of the sewage tunnels. "It won't take us long now, another ten minutes and we should be inside."

Cuvee hadn't expected Irina to be able to hold back her screams until the point of death and turned off the flame, slowly moved towards her, death being part of the plan…but not this early in his game. Gently pushing her hair aside he cupped her cheek and forced her head up. Her eyes were closed and body completely limp, he set the torch down on the cart and felt her neck for a pulse. Finding an erratic but somewhat strong pulse he smiled.

"She's not dead, just unconscious. Remarkable, she is." His thumb caressed her soft skin marred by bruises on her cheek, "To be able to withstand such torture…such a shame to end her life. Such a waste." He let his hand drop and her head dropped roughly with it. Realizing he might not have a lot of time left with Irina, he began undoing his belt buckle much to Sydney's horror.

"She's not even conscious!" She screamed at him through her tears at how perverse and insanely evil this man was. Realizing her mother's unconscious state at what he was currently doing, might be a blessing.

Cuvee dropped his pants just enough and hiked up Irina's dress to her hips again, grunting as he thrust himself into her, hard and ready to go after his foreplay of torture. Sydney couldn't watch and screwed her own eyes shut as her body screamed in pain, tears coursing down her cheeks praying for mercy. She had no idea how her mother could have survived this before…survived years of this relentless torture.

The blood from Irina's mouth running down her chin and onto her chest as her head continued to hang limp and Cuvee buried his face in her hair while he grunted repeatedly bringing himself to climax quickly aided by the slight tremors still running involuntarily through Irina's body and muscles. With a final thrust, he emptied into her a few minutes later and rode it out until he was finished. He pulled out and zipped up satisfied for now. The new trickle of blood running down her inner thighs let Sydney know he'd torn her mother apart once again.

"_I'm going to kill you_." Sydney breathed out in a deadly quiet tone making a vow to end the life of the man who was bringing a rapid end to her mothers, stealing away their time together and her life with them.

Cuvee, lit another cigarette with a smile and puffed on it, taking in few long satisfying drags. Letting the smoking stick perch between his lips he bent over and picked up another silver bucket full of ice-cold water and threw it on Irina, attempting to rouse her.

"Come on, my little Minx." Cuvee was agitated and dropped the bucket, stalking forward and grabbing her roughly by the hair, slapping her hard again and again, angry he couldn't bring her awake.

Her long hair now wet with ice water, created loose tendrils to fall around her face and as a water droplet landed on his arm, he got an idea.

"I'm not finished with her yet. This will bring the little whore to life," He stepped back next to the machine and pressed the button, sending another surge of electricity ripping through Irina's wet body and after twenty seconds of floundering in unconsciousness.

Irina awoke with a loud gasp of breath and Cuvee released the button. Her eyes wide as she came back to the land of the living once more, trying to gauge what had happened. Her entire body was quivering uncontrollably and a fresh wave of horrid pain ripped through her groin alerting her to the fact that he'd taken her again while she was unconscious and thankful that she'd missed that.

She just hoped Sydney... '_Sydney!_' Her mind suddenly came into sharp focus through the mind fog and remembered her daughter was in the room and what had happened before she couldn't remember. She must have held out Cuvee's torture until she passed out she summarized and now her eyes sought out her daughters.

"Sydney…" She gasped out in thick trembling voice. Sydney was wet, trembling uncontrollably with shock and freezing, her foot was severely burned and blistering but she was otherwise in tact.

"Mom…" Sydney cried thankful that her mother was still alive and also pained seeing that this agony was going to continue until Cuvee killed her mother.

"Take the Royal Whore to my office," Cuvee nodded at his guards while he squinted his beady eyes, pausing to inhale once more as he stared at Irina, "And the bastard offspring back to her cell. I want to have some more fun with 'Mommy Dearest' before delivering the final blow."

"_No!_" Sydney struggled and screamed, crying at the thought of being separated from her mother now, knowing what Cuvee's intentions were going to be. '_To rape her mother again and then kill her.'_

Irina's eyes welled tears and she forced herself to smile softly at Sydney as the guards drug her daughter kicking and screaming out the door, wanting the last image Sydney saw of her face to be something other then pain. '_I love you…'_ She mouthed with the smile of bravery and acceptance as the sacrificial kamikaze and Sydney's eyes locked onto hers until their sight was broken when she disappeared behind the steal doors.

Sydney fought the guards all the way back to her cells, sobbing and exhausted when they threw her roughly into her cell, slamming the door shut behind her and leaving her a rumpled mess on the floor. Her shivering, wet, body curling into the fetal position on the cold pavement as her cries for her mother wracked her body.

The brave smile of acceptance she'd just seen on her mothers face mixing with the memories of her face at her execution and both images were running tango in her heart and mind.

"The time has come, Irina. You shall never again, see the light of another day." Cuvee smiled, flashing his teeth at her when the guards returned to collect her. "Bring the cart up as well." He called behind him, signaling he wanted the guards to bring the torture devices up to the office with Irina.

_***The Shadows Betray You***_

"And we're in." Jack stepped through the vent first and into the room with the little desk that he remembered well, could still envision Irina behind the desk, taking control of the mission and her then standing before him with unshed tears and a trembling voice, forcing him to see for the first time; 'Irina Derevko' did indeed have emotions beneath her calm Teflon exterior…forcing him to see for the first time, that perhaps, she had suffered after her extraction too.

"Alright let's move an be on the look out for his guards. According to thermal imaging there were six besides Cuvee." Jack hissed his name with venom and felt his heart pound rapidly against his ribcage at the thought of being so near Irina. He felt her desperation in his soul and new that time was rapidly running out. _'I'm coming My Love, hold on.'_ He willed her silently as they began to creep down the hallway in the dark.

Irina was strapped back onto the desk, this time facing up as Cuvee wanted to look into her eyes when he fucked her and then watch as the life bled from her eyes when he killed her. Her arms and legs were stretched out painfully and her body continued to tremble and convulse every few seconds from the effects of the electrocution and her body going haywire with blood sugar and insulin deficit. She'd vomited twice, dry-heaved really as there was nothing left to expel, on the steps on the way up and continued to feel sharp pangs of pain in her abdomen that made her want to curl up into a tight ball.

The cart was carried up and placed next to the edge of the desk with its knives, scalpels, needles, pliers, tazzer and torch ready and waiting for use.

Cuvee leered appraisingly at his handy-work of inflicting pain upon Irina and slid like the snake he was in between her legs. His fingers lightly caressing up her thighs as he pushed her dress up to her hips once more.

"I think we should start with something of pleasure first, don't you think, my little Minx?" His fingers pushed under her dress and caressed between her folds, sliding his fingers around in the bloody lubricant. His other hand pawing at her exposed breasts, blackened and purple with angry bruises in the shapes of fingers and hands. His fingers plunged inside her and Irina's closed her eyes tightly, her breathing shallow and teeth clenched trying to block out what he was doing. "What's wrong, Irina? Not enough stimulation?" He laughed madly and pulled his bloody fingers out, unzipped his pants and let them drop. His cock rested and ready, standing at attention. He teased it against her center and then thrust forward, filling her completely and making her gasp in pain as her face contorted, turning her head to the side and refusing to look at him. He pulled out and thrust in again, his strong fingers groping at her body once more as he continued to slowly pull out and then pummel back into her. "Still not enough for you? Come on, Irina, you might as well enjoy it, this will be your last fuck on Earth and who better then me to send you out a satisfied woman?" His disgusting cocky ego reared its ugly head as he leaned over and grasped her nipple between his teeth, raking over it with his tongue and then pulling away. Having no effect on her body at all in its delirious state of confusion, her senses dulled, which only frustrated Cuvee.

"Go to hell!" She turned back and looked into his eyes, his cold black eyes that held nothing but lust and hate.

Cuvee's only response was to thrust harder and bite her other nipple, leaving teeth marks in her already bruised flesh.

"Jack's not coming for you." He pulled out slowly again, taking his time, knowing it was his last with her, "You're my whore now. Scream for me!" He commanded.

Irina turned her face away, refusing to give into his demands no matter the cost.

"Scream for me bitch!" He gripped her hips painfully deep with his fingers and pummeled deep inside of her, trying to elicit a reaction. "Scream for me, you fucking whore! I want to hear you scream my name!" He punched her hard in the ribs with his fist and an audible crack could be heard, making Irina inhale sharply, and tears spring to her eyes though she refused to comply. "I'll get you to scream my name!" Cuvee reached over and grabbed the tazzer, and jammed it into her side, shocking her until she withered beneath him and the sensation of her body quivering from the electrocution around his member arouse him even more. He kept shocking her in different places, each time relishing in the effect it was having on her, and him as he took pleasure from her pain.

"What the hell is all of this stuff?" Vaughn asked quietly, in almost a whisper when they hit the main floor of the prison, walking past mounds of crates containing weapons and ammunition.

"This was the stronghold for the People's Revolutionary Front. It's what's left of their weapons stash, I presume." Sark peered around the box and followed Jack through the narrow aisle the crates created and into the dark.

When they hit the other side, they were standing on the base floor of the main block of prison cells; the massive hole in the ceiling letting the moonlight cascade in and illuminate the haunting rows and floors of cells. At the far end of the wide aisle, illuminated by a single moonbeam was the cross on which Irina was 'resurrected Russian' again after Cuvee beat their son to death inside of her and Jack felt his heart skip a beat, his breath catch in his throat. They all paused in moment of quiet horror filled reflection before moving slowly down the aisle, cautiously looking around as they maneuvered around the ceiling rubble.

"I can't believe I'm standing here." Vaughn whispered quietly, looking up and around at the cells in front of him and above. Seeing first hand the images from Irina's films and the ghosts that haunted the cells he could still see banging against their bars, as Irina was drug down the aisle they were walking down now. His skin suddenly shivered and the hair on the back of his neck stood up at he glanced up to the area his father's cell was in from what he remembered from the tape.

Jack could hardly breathe as they crept forward in the shadows, guided by the moonlight, being in this place for the first time after knowing what really happened to Irina here and realizing she had spent two torturous years in this hell.

"The cells they should be in are up in front." Jack guided them forward, whispering and hoping and praying they were still in the cells shown to them on thermal imaging before they'd left. "_Shhh_…listen, do you hear that?" He suddenly stopped them, looking forward and then up at a soft sound coming from above. Someone was crying.

"Sydney!" Vaughn gasped loudly, trying to be quiet even as his eyebrows shot up in recognition of the voice and cry. Their feet suddenly started moving much faster and swiftly and softly ascended the steps to the second level of cells. Making their way towards the cell they heard the crying coming from.

Shining their flashlights in every cell they passed looking for them in the dark corners. Jack sucked in a sharp breath when his light skimmed over the cell with the open door and saw the bloody mattress on the ground, his heart about to explode hoping he wasn't too late.

"_Sydney!_" He called out softly, moving forward and flashed his light around the next cell in a hurried fashion and almost missed her lithe form curled into a ball on the mattress in the corner just opposite the other cell.

The naked skin of her back the only reflecting material as she wore black pants. She didn't seem to hear them through her soft sobs, her body trembling and moved called out again, bending down. "Sydney…"

This time she heard him and flashed her eyes open to see the light casting her shadow on the wall and launched herself upright, turning towards them.

"_Dad!_" She cried and reached frantically through the bars to him and then Vaughn, "_Vaughn! You came…_"

"Sweetheart, are you ok?" Jack immediately started scanning her body seeing the multitude of injuries and bruises, cuts and abrasions covered her face, neck, back, arms, chest and stomach as she sat before them on her knees. Her long hair was soaking wet and she was obviously shivering with her lack of shirt and soaked pants. Her foot was a bloody mangled mess that still smelt of burnt flesh and the rage inside Jack bubbled over at realizing what Cuvee had done.

"He tortured me..._Mom_," She sobbed, clinging to them frantically through the bars, a hand fisted into each of their vests. "Dad, _Mom!_" She started crying hysterically, "He…he, he, he, raped her again and again, even when she was unconscious…he was torturing her. Dad, he's killing her right now! You have to stop him!" She started hyperventilating in panic. "_She's dying!_"

Jack's breath turned ragged with his own panic hearing his daughters' words and frantically flew to her cell door, pulling against it hard.

"Where's the key, Sydney?" He was trying to get her to focus, knowing he needed to get her out and get to Irina immediately, torn between the two but knowing he had to get Sydney out first.

Sark moved to his side, inspecting the lock trying to figure out if he could open it and swallowed hard seeing Sydney's tortured appearance and hearing about Irina.

"The guards have the keys. They're with Cuvee…and Mom…in his office." She sobbed in shock, clinging to Vaughn with both hands now as he knelt beside her, holding her through the bars.

"These bars are all iron. I can't blast them." Sark shook his head sadly, looking up to Jack, "_Shhh!_" He said suddenly, his blue eyes going wide as they heard the sound of a single pair of heavy footsteps on the floor below and heading towards the metal stairs. Jack pulled Sark into the shadows, and Vaughn reluctantly too.

"We're not leaving you." Vaughn mouthed to Sydney before joining Jack and Sark, as they waited for the man to show himself. The heavy bang of drudging boots ascended the stairs and the guilt ridden guard made his way down the walkway carrying a piece of bread, banana and cup of water.

Jack recognized the betrayer immediately and his anger won out as he stalked forward out of the shadows, gun raised directly at the man's head. The guilty man only had a moment of recognition at seeing Jack's face and then the gun before a bullet was lodged silently between his eyes and his body fell straight backwards.

"Go get 'the bastard." Cuvee commanded through his grunts, thrusting into her as he shocked Irina again and she cried, screaming silently in pain as he continued his torture. "It's time for her to see her mother's demise."

The lust driven guards obeyed and left the room reluctantly though amused as the shared disgusting sexual barbs on the way down the stairs and towards the cells.

"Shit!" Jack yelled softly, searching the dead man's body and not finding the keys. "He doesn't have them!"

"Dad…Lena," Sydney's brain suddenly found its bearings and she started crying hysterically again, "She's dead…he hurt her…made Mom choose and he killed her anyway..."

"Sydney, no! We found her!" Vaughn quickly jumped in, holding the side of her face with one hand through the cell bars with a hopeful smile, seeing the shock register on Sydney's face.

"She's alive? You found her?" Her eyes were frantically searching the three of theirs. "She's ok?"

"Yes, we found her. She's in the hospital in Moscow, she's going to be ok." Jack didn't know that for certain, only believed it to be true in his heart and wasn't about to tell his daughter any differently in their current situation. "I promised her I would bring back her mother and sister and that's what we're here doing." He closed his hand over hers on the cell bar with a soft, determined smile with a sense of urgency closing in.

"How did you find her?" Sydney was elated and confused and terrified all at once.

"We'll tell you all that later, right now we need to get you out of here and find your mother!" Jack tried to keep his panic under control, knowing in his heart that Irina was clinging to life somewhere near. "We've got to find the guard with the keys!"

_***Rise***_

Suddenly as if on cue, the metal doors on the opposite wall opened and three guards came lumbering forward, laughing and one making revolting gestures, by thrusting his hips in the air, causing Jack's mouth to go dry and he couldn't swallow knowing in the pit of his stomach what they were laughing about. Without thinking in his state of rage fired from the second story walkway, directly at the revolting man's groin, causing it to blast open in a spray of instantaneous red before he fell to his knees, curling into ball howling in pain before the cross.

The blast alerted the other two stunned guards to their presence and they immediately started firing at them. The bullets were spraying of the metal bars and blasting the cement walls. Jack fired a rapid succession of shots as did Sark and Vaughn tried to keep Sydney shielded with his body the best he could in the corner.

Jack killed one fleeing guard with a single shot to the back of his head, blasting open his skull and dropping him face forward. Sark took out the knees of the other and then both arms, effectively rendering him useless as he and Jack made their way quickly down the stairs. The man who Jack had shot in the groin for making the revolting thrusting motion, was trying to slither away from them with eyes wide in terror as his pants, waste and arms were covered in his blood.

Jack's eyes locked onto his as the man scooted back with Jack stalking in front of him and when his back hit the base of the cross and could go no further, Jack fired another single shot to the man's forehead and he slumped back, dead against the looming cross.

Sark's man was groaning in agony, cursing wildly in Russian as the blonde-haired man stood over him, looking at him a moment before firing into his head as well. He squatted down and retrieved the set of skeleton keys from the man's belt, standing quickly and catching Jack's gaze.

"Go save Irina. I'll get Sydney out."

Jack stood momentarily dumbfounded and then nodded, grasping Sark's shoulder, "Thank you…" He whispered trusting the young man with his daughter's freedom, realizing that everyone else also knew, that Irina was dying and needed to be found immediately.

Sydney was out of immediate danger with Vaughn and Julian to protect her, he needed to get to his wife. Plunging through the steel doors with his gun in hand, he crept into the darkness…standing at the base of the metal staircase Irina had told him about.

A light coming from under the door in the room above. '_His office…_' Jack's mind reeled as he began quickly and quietly making his way up the long metal steps and hearing the sound of a buzzer and then a heart stopping scream of his name.

"_Jaaaaaaaack!_" Irina finally screamed out, with tears coursing down her cheeks, unable to take tazzer-inflicted torture anymore. Her head lulled to the side as the tears fell onto the cold metal, looking to the door, and screamed again as Cuvee held out another long zap to her already electrified body, a boning knife, pressed against her throat biting into her skin. "_Jaaaaaaack!_"

Jack heard her screaming for him and charged up the stairs at full speed, bursting through the door his eyes immediately falling to the scene before him and then to Irina's haunted, terrified eyes, glistening with tears and upon seeing him, she actually smiled, in spite of her chained down position, with Cuvee violating her body and torturing her.

"Jack…" She breathed out in a relieved whisper and the tiny movement from Cuvee in the corner of his eye flicked his line of sight to the tyrant ravaging his wife.

"Well hello, Jack." Cuvee's surprise now turned into a guttural gloat at his current position inside Irina, her naked body sprawled before him chained down while he held a knife to her throat and a tazzer to her body. "I always wondered what your expression would be seeing me fuck your precious whore. She's got a fantastic tight cunt, doesn't she?" He goaded Jack seeing they were at a stalemate with Jack's gun drawn on him, but his knife to Irina's throat. "I was just about to finish her off; you're just in time for the 'climatic' ending of this show."

"Get your fucking disgusting body away from _my wife_." Jack's tone was deadly as his white fury took over, seeing Irina's beaten, bloodied body, trembling and convulsing on top of the cold metal table with this mongers body invading hers.

Cuvee pulled out slowly and then with a wicked gleam thrust hard back into Irina, exploding inside her with his orgasm and, hitting her simultaneously with the tazzer making her wince and scream in pain; Jack fired instantly into Cuvee's left shoulder, forcing him to vault backwards and drop the knife. The force causing him to stumble backwards a few feet and pull out of Irina, his blood covered cock still hard and dripping with his semen.

Jack's rage induced state led him to fire again, taking out Cuvee's right knee and dropping him to the ground, and sending the tazzer skidding across the floor.

"_Keys!_" Jack commanded coming to stand between Cuvee and Irina, gun leveled at Cuvee's head.

"Pants pocket." Cuvee hissed in obvious pain though his maniacal smile remained.

"Throw them to me._ Now._" Jack ordered, unnerved the man was still smiling and wanted to blow the smile right off his face this second…but that rob Irina her chance at him.

"All this trouble for a dirty Russian whore, Jack? Certainly you could have found a nice American girl to satisfy your needs by now…maybe many to get you off?" Cuvee winked at Jack, "Though I don't blame you for trying to stake claim to our Royal Russian Whore's fabulous cunt. It is rather amazing, even if its been tainted by a pathetic American."

Jack fired just beside Cuvee's head, clipping his ear and imbedding the bullet into the wall behind him having had enough of Cuvee's ranting against Irina.

"Give me…the keys!" His eyes spoke of the homicidal tendencies invading his mind at the moment.

Irina fought to pay attention as her mind became increasingly foggier and confusion over what exactly was going on kept drifting in and out of her mind. Her heart pounded rapidly and erratically beneath the walls of her trembling chest and breath remained shallow.

Cuvee felt his ear and the missing chunk and reached into his pants pocket, still slung down by his ankles from where he'd dropped them. He threw them across the floor at Jack, coming to a sliding halt just in front of his black boot.

Jack squatted down to retrieve the keys with gun still trained on Cuvee who sat smugly against the wall, in his jacket, shirt and tie, pants down to his ankles as his bloodied cock deflated against his leg. Rapidly, Jack turned and grasped at the shackle biting into Irina's right ankle, wiggling the key and releasing it, and then the left before standing and looking her over quickly, seeing the obvious mass-devastation Cuvee had left this time in his wake...she was barely alive.

Her eyes held a look he'd never seen and his worry and concern flooded forward and as he struggled to release her wrist with one hand on his gun, trained on Cuvee and the other trying to open the lock. Finally, it flew open exposing her bloody, mangled wrist with bone showing and he felt his stomach pitch and roll with the sight, something he was not used. She was shaking hard, and her wet hair kissed the skin of his hand when she rolled with much effort onto her side to help him as he released her last wrist. He moved quickly to her side and helped her stand, and she fell into his chest before gaining some balance, his arm going protectively around her shoulders until she was steady.

With out-of-control shaking hands, Irina managed to push her dress down over her thighs and up and over her chest once more. Her eyes closing momentarily as Jack pulled her into his side, kissing her head gently, with relief.

"Well, isn't that sweet." Cuvee mocked them with his glare, "The fool comforting the whore."

Irina's eyes snapped open wide and turned her own maniacal glare to Cuvee, her hand reaching behind her onto the desk to grasp the knife he had lost.

_***Necessary Evil***_

"My turn…" She hissed in thick Russian with a trembling voice and a homicidal tone as she twirled the knife in her fingers. Now was the time this man was going to pay for the years of torture he'd put her through and her family.

"My thoughts exactly, My Love. It is your turn." Jack's glacial stare continued as he moved towards Cuvee, grabbing him roughly by his injured arm and pulling him roughly to his feet, gun pointed on him as he threw him against the desk and forced him onto it, back flat against the metal Irina had just been chained to. Jack shackled his arms down as Cuvee had done to his wife.

"Now what, my little Minx, are you going to play the sexual games you love with me now?" Cuvee was suicidal at this point, hoping to provoke enough rage inside of her she'd lose her patience and end his life quickly.

Irina fought through her haze to find her focus and trailed the side of the length of the blade up his member as pure fury took over. "We'll definitely start with this."

"Use this first, My Love." Jack handed her one of the long, thick needles with a dangerous glean in his eye, knowing that she was starting with the most offensive 'weapon' on his body and she should start with the needles as the monster had so enjoyed using them against her.

"Good idea, Sweetheart." Irina took the needle and handed Jack her knife without taking her eyes off Cuvee; she grabbed his offending cock, crusted with her now drying blood and his own semen and rammed the thick needle straight down his urethra causing Cuvee to buck off the table and scream out in pain as the 12 inch piece of metal ripped open the inside of his penis and forced it erect. "We'll leave that there for now. He needs some in his eyes Jack, he always liked putting them in my eyes." She held her hand out for more needles and Jack obliged quickly. As quick as lightening she had the small needles sticking into the whites of his eyes in just the right spot causing sheer and absolute pain to rip through Cuvee's eyes.

"I'm too impatient for this." She hissed out, feeling as though she could collapse at any moment and wanting to move onto something 'really' excruciating. "Not enough pain. I'm tired of his screams, Jack…break his jaw." Her eyes flashed to her husbands and he turned back to Cuvee whose eyes went wide and began to scream no but was instantly met with Jack's iron fist, effectively breaking his jaw. "Thank you, Sweetheart." She dug her fingers into Cuvee's knee that Jack had blasted and watched as his face contorted in pain and screamed against his mouth that wouldn't open to let it out. Her satisfied smile growing as she reached for the knife. "I promised you twenty years ago I would kill you; tonight I am making good on that promise." She slit his sack and ripped out his testicles with her bare fingers, making even Jack wince but proud of her as she open Cuvee's mouth and shoved them inside. "You've forced me to choke on those, now it's your turn." She snapped his broken jaw shut with his testicles inside, his breathing coming fast and labored as tears filled Cuvee's eyes. "Pliers please, Sweetheart." She held her bloody hand out to Jack and he lay the cold metal utensil in her palm.

Immediately she set to work ripping out his fingernails and Cuvee shook his head from side to side, groaning in pain. When that wasn't enough, she looked thoughtfully at his bloody digits a moment then started snapping them back one at a time, breaking everyone of them.

Jack pulled out a desk drawer and found Cuvee's cigars and lit one, puffing on it while he took note of Irina's handy work, feeling it was only fitting that he smoke Cuvee's Cuban stash while Irina tortured the man for all the years he tortured and raped her, then smoked after in victory. When that was finished, Jack handed her the blowtorch, and lit the flame for her.

"Thank you. Let's play a little game…when I hear you scream, I'll stop."

Jack held Cuvee's leg up for her as she set to work torching the bottom of his foot until the flesh was seared away and Cuvee could smell what his own flesh smelt like.

"What is that, Gerard? I don't think I heard you. Are you screaming?" She furrowed her brow at him with a menacing glare directly into his evil eyes, replaying his own game from earlier with Sydney, hearing him mumbling, "See, I don't think I hear you…" She only stopped when his foot had been completely torched and then Jack held out his cigar to her, knowing she deserved to take every-revenge, on this bastard she could.

Jack took the knife and cut the rest of Cuvee's clothes clean off, giving Irina the entire 'canvas' on which to play.

Irina leaned up and pressed the cigar into the sensitive skin under his arm, close to his armpit, scorching his flesh, just as he had done the first time he raped her. She pressed until it was completely out then held it out for Jack to re-light and she repeated this on several areas of Cuvee's body, including the sensitive tip of his own dick.

"Doesn't feel so great does it?" She hissed as she ground the ashes into his skin. "I still don't think he understands what it feels like." She cocked her head to the side and grabbed the knife from Jack with a truly malicious look in her glazed eyes and held onto the tip of Cuvee's shaft once more, pulling the needle from within and placed the knife's blade at the base of his cock, "The torture you have inflicted upon me…has given me an idea." And with that, she sliced off his felonious member, Cuvee's eyes bugging out of his head while Jack stood with his own wide eyes, having never witnessed a man's penis being cut off, though he felt no sympathy for him only righteous indignation for what this scum had done to Irina.

She jammed the scalpel into the cock in her hand and turned it viscously for a few turns burrowing a wider hole into and then reached for the torch once more, jamming Cuvee's detached cock onto the end.

Raising her eyes brows suggestively; she turned on the gas, lit the end and a flame came shooting through the end of his penis head on the torch. Without hesitation, she rammed the end of the torch up Cuvee's ass.

"How does it feel to be fucked by your own dick? Feel the burn ripping you apart inside?" She screamed over him, looking into his eyes and burning him internally with the torch and Cuvee's eyes began to roll with the pain she was inflicting, his insides bubbling and blistering as the flame continued to burn and then went out. She pulled it out and set it aside only long enough to retrieve her new favorite knife and scraped around his skin, carving 'bastard-ass' in his flesh.

Sark and Vaughn had just freed Sydney from the cell and Vaughn was carrying her down the last few steps when gunshots rang out and they dove for cover behind Sark. Coming from behind the massive crate, the last two guards came charging forward, blasting them with AK-47 rounds.

"Sonofabitch! Where'd they come from?" Vaughn screamed over the gunfire as they took shelter and waited for their moment to fire. "_We need extraction immediately!_" He yelled into his Com, alerting Weiss to get there ASAP. "Jack, we've got trouble we've got to go!" Just as he finished his alert and began returning fire with Sark, realizing he wasn't going to live, the crazy Russian bastard who they'd hit several times pulled the pin from a grenade and let it drop where he kneeled a few feet from the ammunition crates.

_***O Fortuna –Excalibur***_

With lightening fast reflexes, Sark's eyes went wide and lunged for Sydney, covering her with his body as Vaughn turned toward them both and dove for shelter as well when the explosion rocked the prison and caved in part of the remaining roof, sending a fireball blasting towards them. It stopped just short of eating them alive and thousands of rounds of ammunition started going off and blasting. Grenade after grenade inside the crates exploded.

Sydney looked up dazed to see Sark shielding her body and when he rolled off of her and Vaughn scooped her up, she felt the sweltering heat of the explosions as they dodged bullets running across the aisle through the doors as the prison turned into a raging inferno.

Sark closing the metal doors behind them in an attempt to buy time as they ran for the front of the compound and extraction point.

"_Jack!_" Sark shouted into his Com watching the fireball spit flames through the bottom of the doors as he looked back. "Get out now! We've got Sydney."

Realizing with the blasts going on around them, they didn't have much time, Irina gouged out one of Cuvee's eyes and shoved his seared dick into the socket, staring into the one remaining eye Cuvee had that was blanketed with sheer terror and torment.

Jack reached back into the drawer and pulled out Cuvee's bottles of vodka and whiskey, he handed the vodka to Irina who took a swig before dumping the contents of the bottle over Cuvee and Jack did the same with the whiskey. Irina held out the torch for Jack to light once more then loomed dangerously over Cuvee's head.

"I told you, one day, you would beg for me to kill you." Stepping back she blasted the flame against Cuvee's alcohol soaked body and watched as his skin ignited immediately; his body wiggling and withering as his screaming moans filled the room feeling his body burning. "Are you begging me to kill you yet?" Irina screamed at Cuvee and then waited for a moment, seeing him nodding furiously in agony and she nodded to Jack who put a bullet in Cuvee's head, ending his existence and sending him straight to hell. Jack flicked the lit cigar onto Cuvee's body and ignited his corpse in a ball of fire.

Grabbing Irina's hand, they ran for the door feeling the massive heat wave the moment they stepped out onto the metal stairs from the raging inferno downstairs.

"We've got to move!" Jack gripped her hand and pulled her quickly down the stairs, seeing the fire about to break through the bottom door below. Irina was following on blind adrenaline, letting him lead as she couldn't think clearly at all anymore.

"_Shit!_" Jack screamed when he realized their 'Exit' was blocked.

"The roof…" Irina pointed to another set of stairs across the small room and Jack's eyes flashed to follow, seeing her running on pure adrenaline and nothing else, about to drop, he pulled hard on her arm and they flew up the stairs together, hand in hand.

"Extract us off the roof!" Jack yelled over the roar of the fire and explosions into his Com.

Weiss heard the plea as Vaughn, carrying Sydney, and Sark came charging toward the helicopter, watching the building exploding behind them.

Feeling the fire blast the doors open just before they pushed through the doors and hit the roof, Jack and Irina broke into full sprints racing towards the edge as the roof began collapsing beneath them and fall into the inferno below. The helicopter appeared just over the ledge in front of them with Sydney sitting on the floor screaming at them both to run faster seeing the building caving in behind her parents.

They hit the ledge at the same time and launched themselves over and into the helicopter, landing with rapid thuds against the deck as Weiss started pulling up and away from the burning building. A massive explosion decimated the building and sent a large heat burst rocking towards them, blasting the helicopter off to the side and they all watched in horror as Sydney flew backwards out the side door, eyes wide, arms flailing as she fell towards the fire ravaged inferno.

Irina didn't think just reacted and grabbed the black snag line and jumped out immediately after her as Jack, Vaughn, and Sark screamed watching them both freefall in disbelief. Irina narrowed her body and reached her arm out as far as she could.

Sydney tried grabbing and finally, gripped her mother's shredded wrist and the snag line wrapped around Irina's other arm, pulled tight and caught their fall.

_***Hanging/Escape***_

"She got her!" Vaughn almost fell over and fainted with relief.

"_Move, move, move, move!_" Jack gasped with white knuckles peering over edge of the helicopter down to his wife and daughter swinging over the flames below. "Irina can't hold her for long! Get us away from these minefields!" His heart had stopped beating the second he saw Irina flying out the door after Sydney, whom he hadn't seen fall but realized that was what was happening after.

The intense, excruciating pain ripping through Irina's side from her broken ribs and holding hers' and Sydney's weight, dangling by one arm wrapped in ropes while her daughter's iron grip dug into her exposed bone in her wrist. She swallowed the pain, hoping she could hold onto her long enough to get them to safety as they flew over the desert, coming closer and closer to the ground until Irina let go of the rope, unable to hold on any longer and they both fell the remaining 15 feet to the sand, rolling over each other as they hit, ending with Sydney on top of Irina, her arms wrapped around her daughter.

"Are you ok?" Irina gasped immediately despite the pain of having Sydney lying on her broken ribs.

"Yeah..." Sydney was in shock first by falling and then seeing her mother come flying out after her in a span of seconds but all in slow motion. "Your heart still sounds like a washing machine." She said absently with her head lying on Irina's chest, ear to her skin. The last time she lay like this over her mother, she was six years old when the 'bad man' came to the door.

Irina breathed out relieved as a small smile crossed her lips, and she ran her hand over Sydney's head, thankful she was safe... she closed her eyes as she heard the chopper setting down near by and the tears finally fell.

"You were right, Mom. Lena's alive. Dad found her." Sydney spoke into Irina's skin as her mother held her tightly to her body, despite the pain it was causing her, she wanted Sydney close. Sydney immediately felt and heard the sharp intake of breath from her mother, relief flooding her immediately.

"Thank you, God. I love you, Sweetheart…" Irina cried as she struggled to keep her eyes open now that the adrenaline was wearing off.

Jack, Vaughn and Sark ran towards them with wild abandon, seeing Irina holding Sydney to her chest. Jack helped to pick Sydney up and held her tightly before letting Vaughn scoop her up and carry her back to helicopter. Sark helping Irina to stand with Jack; Irina kissing his cheek quickly when she saw Julian's face giving him a small smile before her knees went weak and she fell into Jack's arms.

"I want to see my baby, Jack…" She whispered into his ear in a heartbreaking voice and he swooped her up and carried her to the chopper and they flew quickly back to the base.

They were in the air on the jet back to Moscow less then twenty minutes later, having called ahead having it ready and waiting. Irina sat curled up against the window, wrapped in a blanket as Jack went to work finding her insulin and testing kit while Vaughn worked to clean and bandage Sydney's wounds the best he could until they got to the hospital, and Sark worked quietly on Irina's; Weiss getting them both something to eat and drink.

"Thank you…for finding us." Irina spoke softly from beneath closed eyes, as her head lay propped against the back of the seat and the window and blanket. She said this to the four men in general fighting to stay awake but losing the battle, having struggled for days to stay alive and now, _'Sydney was safe...'_

Jack had just come to squat next to her and Sark when her head went limp against the window and arm in Sark's hand.

"_Irina!_" Jack called out immediately, gently shaking her shoulder and terrified to see the blue ring around her mouth again, though her cheeks were flushed. "_Irina!_" This time she wasn't just blacking out, she was unconscious. He moved her over quickly to lie down in the row of seats and felt for her pulse.

It was there but weak. His panic took over and he flew into action ripping open her black testing pouch and holding her cool fingers in his hand as he pricked the end, squeezing blood onto the strip with Sark's help, his own eyes showing his terror.

They all waited for the beep.

"My God…" Jack's eyes instantly filled with tears and scared the hell out of everyone.

"Dad, what is it? I know it has to be bad, he hasn't hardly given her anything…" Sydney trembled in Vaughn's arms, even in a blanket as tears raced down her cheeks.

"It's over 850." He blinked hard, willing himself to focus, wondering if he was really seeing what he was seeing.

"What's it supposed to be?" Weiss asked just as terrified, having no idea really what someone's blood sugar should be.

"She's usually around 70 to 80…" Jack answered barely above a whisper, blinking back tears and Sydney dropped to her knees and crawled the remaining distance to perch at the end where her mother's head was; crying as she ran her hand softly over Irina's forehead, smoothing the hair back. "Irina, wake up…" He shook her softly again. Nothing. "Call the hospital and-."

"Have an air and ground ambulance waiting when we land." Weiss finished for Jack, knowing what needed to be done and flew to the front of the plane.

"_Mom, don't you dare!_ We made it through all that, I won't let you leave me now!" Sydney buried her face into Irina's still damp hair, "Lena needs you Mom. I need you, please, please hang on just a little bit longer!"

Jack pulled a bottle of insulin out and drew a syringe full, never having administered this kind of amount to her before and terrified of the results if he did or didn't give it to her. Slowly he slid the needle straight through her blood and dirt stained dress into her abdomen, for going all normal methods of preparation in this emergency situation. Jack held her hand in his, kissing her fingers.

"Please, Irina, don't you leave us now."

When the plane descended into Moscow, Jack had Irina cradled in his arm, wrapped in blankets and Vaughn carrying Sydney followed him out to meet the waiting ambulances.

Irina was Critical, so she would be rushed immediately to the hospital in the air ambulance and Sydney would go by ground.

A gurney was wheeled out of the waiting helicopter and met Jack as Sark helped him put Irina down, the doctor who met them was more then surprised to see them again as he had been the one to take Lena. He looked from Jack down the unconscious woman and gasped.

"The Empress…" His eyes went wide realizing that he was life-flighting the Tsar of Imperial Russia to the hospital, her life hanging in the balance, and he'd been tasked to keep her alive until then. "I'm sorry, sir-" He began.

"I know. I can't go with her." Jack finished for him over the loud hum of the helicopter blades, holding Irina's hand in his own and then dropping a quick kiss to her lips and within seconds she was loaded. The helicopter lifting into the air, as Sydney was loaded and they took off for the hospital, sirens blaring loudly.

"They're bringing her in now!" Vladimir burst through the NICU door and informed Katya, having only learned only moments ago they'd landed. Katya jumped for the rocking chair she had occupied and she looked quickly to Sophia who had followed the Russian President in.

"Don't worry, Mama. I'll stay with her." Sophia smiled softly, nodding, seeing her distraught mother and then looking to the comatose baby in the incubator.

"Thank you." Katya breezed by her, kissing her head quickly and dropped in line quickly behind Vladimir, Mikhail and Bella as they headed for the emergency room."What kind of condition is she in?" Katya asked nervously as they all rode the elevator down together, looking at Putin. "And what about Sydney?"

"I don't know. They didn't say anything about their conditions, only that Irina was arriving by air, and Sydney by land." He said quiet as the elevator stopped and the doors opened.

Walking briskly down the hall the heard the incoming helicopter and they watched as it landed just outside the doors. Katya grasped Vladimir's hand tightly as Mikhail did of Bella, all waiting on bated breath, as Irina was unloaded from the ambulance.

"My God…" Katya's eyes instantly flooding with tears, she sobbed when she saw her sister, looking deathly pale beneath the deep bruises and wrapped in the white sheets as a flight nurse continued to squeeze an air bag over Irina's mouth, giving her oxygen. "Rina!" She called out stepping forward quickly trying to get to her sister but was held back by Vladimir as the doctors and nurses flew into action surrounding Irina. "I don't understand! What's going on? What's happening to her?" She demanded through her panic and tears, looking around at the doctors for answers when Irina disappeared behind the heavy doors and she could only watch through the tiny windows as they began working on Irina.

"The Empress has slipped into a diabetic coma." The flight doctor informed them, softly, his part in helping Irina, over now as he passed on her care to the hospital physicians. "I'm sorry, that's all I can tell you right now. The doctors will be able to inform you better when they've stabilized her."

"Oh no…" Katya's knees went weak and she sat heavily in the chair outside the emergency room doors, tears cascading down her cheeks, realizing they had found Irina and Sydney, but possibly not in time now that her sister's life was hanging in the balance yet again. "What about Sydney? My niece." Her eyes suddenly looked up to his, asking about her niece.

"She should be arriving by ambulance any minute." He gave her a weak smile, "Her injuries are Serious but non-life-threatening." He tried to reassure them.

"Thank God." Mikhail sighed in relief and then quickly explained to Bella who was still learning Russian, what was going on.

"What in the hell?" Jack's eyes narrowed as they pulled into the emergency entrance of the hospital and found crowds of Russians gathered in the streets, bundled tightly and holding small candles that illuminated the night.

A mass of paparazzi had all huddled together with cameras waiting. He didn't have time to contemplate the 'whys' as he jumped out of the moving vehicle before it was even fully stopped and raced toward the ambulance unloading Sydney; Vaughn by her side. They burst into the doors and found the small group already teary-eyed and gathered waiting in the newly renovated, state-of-the-art hospital, thanks to Irina and her funneling of mafia money back into Russia.

"Sydney! Thank God!" Bella rushed forth and gave her future daughter-in-law a slight hug, not to hurt her, and kiss, her eyes pooling tears of relief as they wheeled Sydney into an examination room. "How are you? Where are you hurt?" She ran rampant with concern questioning Sydney in French.

"I'm fine…really. Nothing that won't heal with time." She tried to smile through her own tears to reassure her future mother-in-law as Katya quickly inspected her niece as well, seeing the horrid bandage soaked in blood and ooze on Sydney's foot, the multitude of bruises coursing her body and face.

"Oh Sydney…" Katya kisses her head and then cheeks with a soft smile, tears running over her cheeks.

"Where's Mom? What's happening with her?" Sydney grasped Katya's hand and asked quickly, seeing her father outside her room talking with a doctor with deep concern on his face.

"She's gone into a Diabetic Coma." Katya gulped, trying to swallow the dryness in her throat as more tears pooled. "They're trying to stabilize her." She spoke softly and carefully brushed the tears on Sydney's cheek. "I'll go see what's going on." She kissed her cheek again before stepping out of the room with Bella as the doctors began working on Sydney.

Bella stopping to hug and kiss her son, with a happy, relieved smile on her face. Vaughn returned the smile to his mother and went to sit on the stool beside Sydney's bedside.

"Jack!" Katya rushed to his side just as the doctor was leaving to go back to Irina. Mikhail, Bella, Vladimir, Weiss and Sark all were listening intently. "What is happening? What did he say about Rina?"

"She is in Ketoacidosis." Jack said softly, watching through the small windows as the nurses and doctors worked rapidly around Irina.

"Well, what the hell is that?" Katya's eyebrows narrowed with angry, frustrated tears.

"Increased blood acids." Jack turned his attention back to the group, meeting Katya's eyes. "He said that when the body becomes so starved for energy, it takes emergency measures and starts breaking down her fat and muscle and forms acids in the blood called ketones. She has too many ketones in her bloodstream." He paused briefly to look back at Irina through the window then turned back to Katya and the group, "Her blood glucose is over 800 now…it's supposed to be around 70."

"Oh God…" Katya's sharp intake of breath made Jack swallow hard, both knowing that this was extremely serious.

"That's why she's fallen into a coma." He gulped again, trying to force his tears from forming at the prospect of losing Irina once again.

"Well how do they fix it?! How do they pull her out of this?" Katya asked the questions everyone else wanted the answers too as well. What everyone was really thinking was, _'How do 'we' fix it? How do 'we' make her better?'_

"They've started replenishing her lost fluids and insulin through IV lines. She needs the potassium and sodium. The doctor said that as the insulin is administered, her body will start using blood sugar for energy, which will decrease the need for ketones as fuel." Jack briefly remembered having read about this condition when Irina was first faced with the prospect of being insulin dependent for life after the Execution. The doctor had given them pamphlets to read then. Now they were faced with the hard realities of it. "Gradually Irina's blood ketone levels will decrease, and her blood sugar level should return to normal over a period of hours to days. They are going to closely monitor her blood glucose and fluid levels. As things even out, she should come out of the coma. Right now, they are just trying to get her Stable before they can even start attending to her other wounds and injuries."

"Oh, Thank God!" Katya sighed in relief at hearing there was great hope that Irina would recover from this too. Though her relief was short lived realizing her sister was still in grave danger and suffering a multitude of other injuries.

"Sydney's going nuts with worry over Irina." Vaughn emerged from Sydney's room moments later with an exhausted appearance. "I have to tell her something. Can someone please tell me what's going on with Irina so I can tell her?"

"I'll tell her." Jack sighed softly, "How's Lena and who's with her?" He didn't want his baby girl left alone and quickly scanned the faces, noticing that Sophia was missing. "Sophia?"

"Yes. Sophia is with her. She's still in an induced coma. The doctors don't want to pull her out yet, she's still too weak." Katya felt a fresh waves of tears coming but offered a slight smile trying to give Jack 'some' good news in the face of all this tragedy, "But she's getting stronger everyday and her vitals have been holding stable…she's a fighter. All of Russia…the world has been praying for her."

"What?" Jack's eyes went wide with surprise and then it clicked, the somber looking Russians in the streets outside in their quiet candle lit vigil.

"Just after you left, video footage of Irina's motorcycle heroics, were released on news networks around the world caught on many tourist's home videos. The future Russian Tsar chasing down and capturing an Al-Quada terrorist is big news. So of course, everyone wanted to talk to Rina about it, and she was nowhere to be found. Then the news that Lena had been hospitalized and her injuries started to spread and we realized we had to tell them the truth. How else could we possibly explain the baby's severe injuries and Rina's absence from her side?" Katya had rattled out quickly, and then paused with a heavy sigh, drained physically and mentally. "So we told them, that Rina, Sydney and Lena, had all been kidnapped and we'd found Lena badly injured and that a Rescue Team had been sent to find Irina and Sydney. Shortly after the news was released, the people started showing up with their candle lit vigils outside the hospital, praying for Lena and for Irina and Sydney's return."

"They are holding candle lit vigils all over Russia tonight. All over the world really, from what we've seen on the news, people are praying and lighting candles for them outside every Russian Embassy." Mikhail smiled softly at how the world was coming together in their thoughts and prayers for Irina and her daughters, the entire Imperial family.

"I'm going to wait to until Irina is stabilized and we know more before I give the public an update that both she and Sydney were found and of their condition." Vladimir added softly, knowing that it needed to be done. Irina's new role in society made her health a very public concern.

So far the Russian people, the world, were being very respectful about the privacy of the matter, satisfied with the updates they were receiving from the Russian President.

Jack nodded softly in agreement and turned slowly towards his daughter's room a few feet away.

"Dad what's going on? With Mom and with Lena? Where are they?" Sydney asked panicked as three nurses and two doctors continuously worked to clean her wounds, stitch up the ones that needed it, and the doctors worked diligently on her foot. She was suffering from dehydration and exhaustion and hooked up to an IV to replenish some of her own lost fluids.

"Sydney," Jack held onto her hand, noticing that she was still trembling uncontrollably, "They are still working on your mother. She has too many ketones, acids, in her blood which made her go into a coma… but they are working right now to reverse it. She's going to be ok." He tried to give her a hopeful smile, wanting to believe with all his heart that it was the truth he would not lose Irina. "Your mother is a fighter, we both know this and your little sister is too."

"Where is Lena? Mom needs her right now, we need to put her on Mom's chest again, and make her wake-up like last time!" Sydney was still crying and talking rapidly overcome with worry for her mother.

"Lena's upstairs in the NICU. She's still in an induced coma but Katya said she's getting stronger everyday." He gave her a small smile, and wiped her fallen tears carefully; his heart breaking with Sydney's plea. "But we can't take her out of her incubator yet, Sydney. I wish we could. I think she is exactly what your mother needs right now, too."

"I want to see Lena right now." Sydney said resolutely, determined to see her little sister she thought dead just hours ago.

"And you will but not right now, Sweetheart. You need to rest awhile first and then I promise, I'll take you up there myself, ok?" Jack could see her stubborn streak flaring behind her eyes.

"Dad, I want to see her no. You don't understand…We thought he killed her!" Sydney started sobbing remembering the images of Cuvee's brutality against her baby sister.


	56. Chapter 56

FIFTY-SIX

o

"I know, Honey, and I'm sorry," Jack felt his eyes burning with tears seeing Sydney so upset and feeling his own heart clenching at the memory of Lena's condition when they'd found her, thinking about how much it had to have hurt his wife and daughter to watch Lena being tortured. "We can't take you up there right now. As soon as they are done with your foot I promise, we'll go together."

Sydney slumped back into her fluffy pillows in defeat, closing her eyes for a moment as more silent tears stained her cheeks and she sniffled. "I don't understand it. After everything…Mom goes down on the plane." She shook her head softly in disbelief.

"The doctor said he was surprised your mother didn't go unconscious earlier with her blood glucose levels as they are." Jack spoke honestly and quietly, having thought about the question before as well. "I think she was holding on…until she knew you were safe, Sydney." His eyes found hers with a soft smile, "I think her love for you is so powerful, she wouldn't _allow_ her body to shut down, until she knew that you were safe...once she knew you were, she couldn't fight it anymore."

"I can't believe she was physically able to jump out of the helicopter and save me then, if she was almost comatose with her blood levels on top of her other injuries. To be able to hold onto the both of us like she did." Sydney shook her pounding head again softly in wonder and amazement at her mother's body, determination and most of all _love_.

"Your mother is extraordinary." Jack spoke softly with a small smile, marveling with his daughter at Irina. "As are you, Sydney. As much as I'd like to ring your neck for going after your mother without back up like you did, voluntarily walking into a trap. I am proud of your reasons." He admitted proudly, also realizing that it was likely Irina's will to hold on long enough to keep Sydney safe, that likely saved Irina's life. Without Sydney being there, Irina may have been dead before they found them.

Sydney was a little stunned by Jack's admission.

"Dad, I had to. When he called, it was either follow his instructions or take the chance of losing what might have been the only lead we had on Mom and Lena. I knew I was walking into trap and I only hoped that you guys would catch on quickly but I couldn't let Mom go through that alone, not again." Her eyes filled with more tears and her voice quivered, "And I was given the chance to be there with her…so I went."

"I know, Sweetheart…" Jack clasped her one hand in the both of his, speaking softly with understanding as a nurse put a bandage over the cut on Sydney's forehead.

"Dad, how did you know where to find us?" Sydney asked quietly after a moment.

"Cuvee. To taunt me…and I suppose your mother if she knows...sent me a video file." His eyes found hers again speaking in the same hushed tones, "Mikhail recognized it to be Cuvee's office in Kashmir." He saw the moment of registration flash through Sydney's eyes.

"In the office?" Sydney whispered and swallowed hard, looking into her father's eyes with her own blurry ones, "When he made her chose between raping me…or her?"

"Yes." Jack nodded softly and they were both quiet again as Sydney averted her eyes and looked at the crisp white sheet covering her legs. "Sydney, did he ever?" Jack braved the tough question he knew he needed to ask, his heart pounding rapidly at the thought of Cuvee raping his daughter, too.

"No." She said immediately, shaking her head with more tears. "Just Mom. Always Mom. He said he wanted to have his 'fun' with her before he killed her. Then he'd take me away and 'break me' like he had done to her." Her bottom lip trembled as her eyes looked up to meet his, "The things he did to her, Dad…" She shook her head at the assault of images flooding her mind of Cuvee ravaging her mother, "He played this sick 'game' he called it, with us. Where he had Mom chained, suspended from the ceiling in the torture room…hooked up to electrodes…while I was strapped down onto the table in front of her." Her voice cracked and her words were barely above a whisper and Jack could feel the tremors passing through her body in the hand he held in his own. "He would electrocute Mom until she screamed in pain and then as soon as she did, he'd stop with her and then torch me until I screamed and then he'd go back to electrocuting Mom until she screamed and he kept doing this…knowing that neither one of us wanted to scream. Knowing that as soon as we did…the other would be tortured." She sniffled as her eyes and nose ran, a shiver shaking her whole body at remembering seeing her mother withering against her chains, the blood coursing down her face from her mouth. "Mom fought…and refused to scream. I was screaming at her to _just scream_ because he was killing her!" She sobbed, and Jack's eyes filled with tears hearing of their torture and hearing again of Irina's maternal instincts to protect at all costs to herself. "She wouldn't though, trying to protect me and finally she couldn't take it anymore and passed out." She gripped his hand harder, trying desperately to hold on as her body, her soul, trembled with the recollection. "He realized he was killing her, that she was dying and decided…to rape her again quickly before she did." Sydney sobbed and Jack fought viciously to fend off his tears, keep them from falling. "Dad, he just raped her…while she unconscious and dying…chained to the wall…he just raped her." Her words were barely above a whisper. "I've never wanted to kill anyone more in my life then in that moment…not even Sloane, Dad." Her glistening eyes found his, "Please tell me that he is dead? That Cuvee is burning in the pit-fires of hell and will never…_ever_ be able to hurt Mom again?"

"Yes, he's dead. He won't ever hurt your mother, or you, or Lena ever again." Jack sighed, taking a deep breath and blinked back his remaining tears.

"You're positive? He has no way of escaping death?" Sydney was still worried knowing that in this life, people came back from the dead often.

"Yes, I am positive. I shot him in the head myself." Jack swallowed hard, his mind suddenly flashing to Irina in that moment and her act of compassion for the man who didn't deserve it, having Jack end Cuvee's suffering when he'd made her suffer again and again never showing an iota of compassion that she bestowed upon him. "His body was consumed by the fires on Earth while his soul was consumed by the fires of Hell."

"Thank God." Sydney sighed in relief, closing her eyes as more tears fell. "It's finally over." Her eyes flashed open, "Please tell me, Mom at least got to extract some revenge on the bastard-ass before you ended his miserable existence?"

"Yes. She did." Jack nodded softly, not wanting to go into the details of just 'how' Irina took her revenge; piece-by-piece from the man who had broken her spirit, killed their son, ravaged her body, tortured their daughters and executed her mother, taking her life apart piece-by-piece for years.

"Good." Sydney squeezed his hand again, eyes caring a, seriousness even as the corners of her mouth turned up in pride and admiration. "You saved her, Dad. She knew you'd come. This time, she _knew_ you'd come."

* * *

The doctors were able to stabilize Irina, though still Critical, and she was moved to an Intensive Care Unit on the 8th floor. Sydney was admitted as well, and her room was on the Burn Unit on the 6th floor where they could monitor her foot. Lena was still in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit on the 5th floor. The same rules were applied for the Intensive Care Unit Irina was in and only two visitors were allowed at a time.

"You can go in now, sir." The nurse smiled nervously at Jack as she exited Irina's room, having gotten her completely settled and another nurse was still finishing up.

Jack and Katya cautiously walked into the ICU Pod that was Irina's and Katya gasped softly, tears flooding her eyes at seeing her sister like this again. The nurse began to tell them of Irina's injuries and treatments given.

Irina had been put on a ventilator and the doctor said that once her numbers started coming down, they would remove it. She had lost enough blood from her injuries that she was in need of a transfusion and Katya, once again, had donated her blood gladly to her sister. Irina was suffering from a compound concussion, first from the car accident and yet another from having her head slammed against the concrete wall. The open, deep wounds on her wrists from her restraints had been cleaned and sutured with dozens of little blue stitches making bracelets around her slight wrists and the cuts on her face had been closed with butterfly bandages and a few stitches. The burns from Cuvee's cigarette and cigar, as well as those left behind from the electrodes had been cleaned and dressed. Cuvee had broken three ribs and her chest had been wrapped with an elastic bandage for support. The internal damage the man had caused by raping her was significant enough to require stitching, in two layers. She was dehydrated and exhausted like Sydney and a continuous drip of IV fluids and insulin poured into her veins.

"We also ran a standard pregnancy test that we do after an assault," The nurse swallowed hard realizing whom she was talking about and with whom, she diverted her eyes nervously before meeting Jack's hardened gaze.

Jack and Katya both holding their breath until the woman went on.

"It was negative." She saw the look of relief wash over both of their faces.

"Oh, Thank God…" Katya exhaled the breath she'd been holding in. The last thing Irina needed was to be impregnated by Cuvee from rape again. She'd already gone through enough without adding to it.

"If there is anything else, if you have any questions…" The nurse paused by the door, "We'll be right outside at the nurses station." She gave them a small warm smile. Noticing that Jack was still in his black tactical gear, his face streaked with smoke and smudges from tears she added, "If you would like to clean up, Mr. Bristow, there is a family waiting area with showers available just down the hall. I can find you some scrubs for you to wear if you'll be more comfortable?"

"Yes, Thank you." Jack nodded with a small smile through his tired eyes. He knew it wasn't very sanitary to be around Irina and certainly not Lena with as dirty as he and everyone else on the team was. He was going to have to shower before he went to see Lena, to touch her.

"I'll go find you some scrubs then." She smiled and left.

Jack stood at the end of Irina's bed listening to the rhythmic beeping of her heart on the monitor and the soft whooshing of her ventilator.

Katya looked from her sister whose color was improving to the exhausted man beside her and smiled before flinging her arms around Jack and taking him by surprise.

"You saved her, Jack. Thank you." She cried happy tears over his shoulder, that in spite of Irina's fragile condition now, she was here…she was alive. Jack slowly wrapped his arms around her, holding her back, both needing the contact in their shared relief and worry.

Jack and Katya sat with Irina, holding her hands while Jack explained quietly to Katya what had happened in the rescue and what happened on the plane when Irina went unconscious. After assuring him that she would not leave Irina's side, Katya successfully managed to convince Jack to go grab a shower and check in on Sydney and Lena, whom she knew he was dying to see.

The shower had been quick but a short reprieve from the insanity still surrounding him and he decided that they were over the worst of it, his girls would all keep improving and soon…he'd be able to take them all home.

Sydney had demanded a shower and after much protesting, she eventually got her way after breaking down to Vaughn crying that she _had to wash Cuvee and that prison's filth from her body_. Her desperate pleas understandable after what she'd been through and Vaughn and another nurse managed to help her get cleaned up, washing her long hair and carefully removing the dried blood and grime from her bruised skin.

When Jack arrived to take her to see Lena, she was clothed in the traditional hospital gown and robe, sitting in a wheelchair with her leg propped up and her IV stand along side her, obviously anxious to see her sister.

Once Sydney was safe in the presence of her father, Vaughn took the opportunity to change and get him self cleaned up, finding Weiss and Sark had done the same. Now all four men were dressed in mint green hospital scrubs and went from looking like a SWAT team to a group of doctors.

"Are you ready?" Jack asked softly, searching Sydney's eyes before he pushed through the NICU doors. He knew she was anxious to see Lena but the overwhelming reality of her injuries, seeing her in that incubator was undoubtedly going to hit his oldest daughter hard.

"Yes." Sydney nodded, tears already pooling.

He pushed the button on the wall and the large metal doors opened and he wheeled Sydney inside, earning looks from the nurses and doctors as well as other patients and visitors, everyone knowing who these two were and whom they were going to see.

When they reached Lena's Pod, Sophia bolted from the rocking chair with a smile and happy tears at seeing Sydney.

"Oh Sydney!" She smiled excitedly as she bent over to hug Sydney, kissing her cheeks. "Thank God, you're okay." She smiled brushing her fingers gently over Sydney's bruised face as more tears came for both girls, and Sophia kissed her once again. "She's been doing really well today." Sophia smiled looking back at Lena in the incubator and then to Jack and Sydney. "I'll leave you guys with her. I want to go see Aunt Rina, if that's ok?"

"Yes, of course. Thank you, Sophia." Jack grabbed her arm and kissed her cheek before she turned to leave.

"Oh Lena…" Sydney gasped as Jack pushed her forward, giving her a better view. Her eyes immediately overflowed with tears, as she looked up at her sister in the plastic incubator, watching Lena's little chest rising and falling under the elastic band keeping her arm in place. "Why are her eyes covered?" She sniffled, her palm resting on the clear barrier.

"To protect them from the light." Jack said softly, his own palm over the glass, and relieved to see his baby girl again. "I promised her I would find you, and bring you both back." He turned his face to smile softly at Sydney, earning him a smile in response, and Sydney batted at her fallen tears.

"Dad, I want to stand up to get a better look at her. Can you please help me?" Sydney looked up at him with her famous doe eyes and Jack couldn't refuse. Gently he gripped her arms and helped pull her up, allowing her to use his body for support as she could not stand on her foot. "Thank you." She smiled at him, having a better view of her sister now. She took in her sisters' appearance, the cast on her tiny arm and the elastic band holding the other to her little body. "She broke her collar-bone, too." She stated to her father, not really asking the question, remembering the first snap they had heard.

"Yes. And her humorous." Jack answered softly, kissing Sydney's head softly.

"What are all those red marks? Are those…" She couldn't finish as more tears spilled forth, knowing what they were already.

"Bite marks…from the rats." Jack answered with a heavy heart, "But they are healing well, Sydney. They look a lot better then when I last saw her early this morning. Wow... I can't even believe it hasn't been 24 hours."

The day had started as a whirl-wind of getting the tape from Cuvee, flying to India, then Kashmir, the prison break in, rescuing Sydney and Irina, the escape of the wild inferno, the flight back and now in the very early hours of the morning, back at the hospital with all three.

"Seeing her like this…is just going to crush Mom." Sydney said barely above a whisper, remembering her mother's guilt over what happened when they talked in the prison. "She feels like this is all her fault, which it obviously isn't but she still feels guilty that she couldn't protect her from him."

"Her guilt in unfounded and she has no reason to feel that way, though I understand why she does." Jack mulled over Irina's guilt in his own heart and mind. "It's hard for a parent to realize that there are just some things in life that are uncontrollable and you can't protect your child from everything no matter how hard you try."

"She never really believed Lena was dead." Sydney spoke softly as more tears fell, grazing her hand over the plastic incubator, wanting so badly to hold her sister in her arms, kiss her soft downy head.

"What?" Jack asked softly, not understanding what Sydney was saying as she just stopped without an explanation of her words.

"Mom," Sydney turned to look at him, feeling safe in her father's strong arms for the first time since she was six years old on that camping trip when she broke her leg. "She said that she couldn't 'feel' that disconnection with Lena. She said in her heart, she didn't believe she was dead and Mom was right." Her eyes turned back to look at her sister.

"A very powerful connection; that bond between a mother and child." Jack smiled, his eyes welling with tears as his emotions got the best of him thinking about Irina and his girls. "Do you want to touch her?" Jack's smile widened realizing that they could poke their hands through the side holes if they wanted now.

"Yes! Of course! Can we?" Sydney's eyebrows suddenly furrowed in 'that' way that was so distinctly a Derevko trait and made Jack laugh softly.

"Yes. We can."

* * *

Vladimir had informed the Russian public as well as the world that Irina and Sydney had been found and were now receiving medical attention. Irina was in Intensive Care in a Diabetic Coma but holding stable in Critical Condition and Sydney was being treated for non-life threatening injuries. Immediately after his public statement, the Russian PR service was bombarded with 'well wishers' from governments around the world, wondering how they could help and where they could send flowers and food and anything else the Imperial Family might need at this time.

Weiss had spoken with Kendall, updating him on everything and everyone. He'd told him the shortened version of the rescue from what he'd heard from Sark and Vaughn and then from is own account. They would all have to file official reports when they returned but that could wait for now. A huge sigh of relief had gone around the Russian and American Intelligence groups had had collaborated to find and bring Irina, Sydney and Lena home.

The following day, Katya and Sophia had decided that the hospital issued gowns that Sydney and Irina wore were unacceptable and went shopping for something else for them to wear. It was a short reprieve that was greatly appreciated for the both of them, getting them out of the hospital for awhile as they had been there for almost a week without leaving.

Jack encouraged them to go and they took Bella with them, knowing she needed a break just as much. Mikhail, Vaughn, Sark, Weiss and Jack all took turns sitting with Irina, Sydney and Lena over the course of the next couple of days.

Irina's numbers were slowly coming down and Jack was waiting impatiently for her to wake up so he could look into her big beautiful brown eyes.

The Russian public maintained their vigil outside the hospital and those who weren't able to attend, lit candles and placed them in every window of every home, every storefront window and every church.

Sydney was elated with the soft satin nightgown and matching robe that the women had bought for her. Their happiness was only dampened slightly when the doctor and nurses informed them that as long as Irina was in ICU and on the ventilator, she had to keep the hospital issue gown that was easily torn away if need be in an Emergency. As soon as Irina was off the breathing machine and moved to her own private room, then she could wear the beautiful black nightgown and robe the women had found for her.

The following day, Irina's numbers had improved enough to take her off the ventilator and by the end of the day she had been moved to her own private room.

It was sometime in the middle of the night on the fifth day post rescue, that Jack felt the light squeezing of his fingers. He had been sleeping with his head face down in Irina's bed, his fingers linked with hers as he sat in the chair beside her bed. He hadn't been sure he felt the movement or dreamt it and when she squeezed them again, he bolted upright, his face searching hers and smiled when he saw her fluttering eyes and the sparkle of light that hit her beautiful eyes as she opened them further.

"Irina…" He said softly, moving to stand without releasing her hand, so that he was closer to her, looking down into her eyes. "Hey beautiful…Welcome back." He smiled as tears flooded his eyes when she gave him a small smile and gripped his hand more tightly.

"Hi…" She croaked out with a dry rasp softly.

"Here." Jack quickly poured her a cup of water and tilted the straw so that she could have a sip. "Better?" He asked setting the cup down when she nodded.

"How long?" She asked quietly as Jack sat on the edge of the bed beside her, stroking her long hair and pushing it behind her ears, with a smile he couldn't tear off his face at his happiness of her being awake. The last thing Irina remembered clearly was getting on the CIA's plane in India and Julian bandaging her wrist. She knew from glancing briefly around and seeing the room, hearing the heart monitor; that she was in the hospital.

"Five days." He brushed her bruised cheek gently with the back of his fingers, leaning over to kiss her lips softly. "I love you." He had been dying to do that since he barged into Cuvee's office and found her, but there wasn't time and the situation and timing were off then.

"You came for me." She rasped out, with his face still hovering over hers, just inches away, her eyes filling with tears, her heart pumping furiously now with the love she had for him and setting off a rapid stream of beats from the machine. She had wanted to believe in her heart that he would, told her self he would, knew he would…but was never more relieved to see him then when he came through that door in Cuvee's office, her beliefs and hopes had become reality.

Jack smiled hearing the sound of the beeps pick up and looking into her shining eyes with unbridled love. His own tears finally spilling down his cheek silently as he dipped his head once more, to capture her lips softly with his, holding them there and letting it linger.

Irina raised her free hand to the back of Jack's head, tangling in his hair as she held his face to hers', their fallen tears mingling together over her cheeks.

"I love you, Jack. Thank you." She whispered.

"You don't have to thank me." He brushed his nose with hers softly, looking into her dark glistening eyes. "I love you…I'll always come for you, Irina…and had I known you were still alive twenty years ago, I would have come for you then, too." He spoke softly, honestly knowing in his heart that he would have, no matter what he'd learned about her. If he had known then, right after he was released from prison before the years of anger and hate replaced the love, that she was alive…he would have found her in spite of who she really was.

"I know you would have." She kissed him again and then pulled him down to her, holding him as he buried his face into her neck and hair, and her own face into his neck, inhaling his scent, overcome by emotions. The emotions from the past and the emotions of the present flooding through her veins. "How are Sydney and Lena? Jack where are my babies?" She pulled back with fear running through her eyes and her heart rate spiked considerably.

"They're ok, Irina. Sydney is a couple of floors below you in the Burn Unit and Lena is still in the NICU." His attention was drawn to the heart monitor and the alarm that was now going off from the instant jolt in Irina's heartbeat. "Love, you need to calm down…They're ok."

"I want to see them. Now Jack. I want to see them now!" Irina's eyes flooded with more tears. She had to make sure for herself that her girls were ok. She hadn't seen Lena since Cuvee had left her broken and bleeding on the cold factory floor. Her heart ached to hold them both in her arms.

The nurses had been alerted to the alarm and were immediately descending upon the room, surprised smiles lit their faces when they saw she was awake.

"I know you want to see them, Irina, but you are in no condition to travel anywhere, yet. You just woke up from a coma and your blood glucose is still too high. The girls are both sleeping…its only 3:00 a.m." He stroked the side of her head, wiping her tears with his thumb as the nurses worked around him, shutting off the alarm.

"Your Highness, glad to see you're awake." The one named Ivana smiled at Irina, hanging a new IV bag. "I know you want to see your beautiful girls but I'm afraid you can't right now, as your husband said." She looked over at Jack, maintaining her smile as she watched the couple before her. Having only heard about the Tsar's bizarre love story in the news and now witnessing it first hand. The loving touches and caresses, the tears, the soft-spoken words and the way they held onto each other. "They are asleep and you still need to rest."

"I've been in a coma! Sleeping for five days! That's enough rest." Irina spoke determinedly and Jack had to hold in his chuckle thinking back to Sydney and her almost identical reaction and expression when she wanted to see Lena when she was first brought in.

"You may have been unconscious, Empress, but you weren't really 'resting.' Your body was working very hard to repair itself." The nurse smiled, seeing the tenacious side of the Tsar she'd heard so much about, putting others before her own self, always. '_This woman is truly 'Mother Russia.'_ The smiling nurse thought to herself. _'Her fighting spirit to protect her children…This was exactly what Russia needed._' "I promise that as soon as your numbers drop down a bit more, we'll take you to see your gorgeous baby and I'm sure the Grand Duchess Sydney will come see you first thing in the morning." The smiling nurse gripped Irina's forearm softly, trying to calm her seeing her heart still racing. "She's come to your room first thing every morning since you've both arrived. She's as tenacious as you, Empress, in getting what she wants. We've had to practically drag her back to her own room to rest, she's been so intent on staying by yours and her sister's sides."

"That sounds like, Sydney." Irina smiled softly, sighing with relief and both Jack and the nurse chuckled. If Sydney was being as stubborn as she, she must be 'ok.'

"Right now. I would like you to please calm down for me." The nurse glanced over to the heart monitor still beeping madly as Irina's heart raced past 200 and she raised Irina's upper body, propping her up a little by pressing the buttons on the bed. "Take some calming breaths for me and close your eyes. Try to relax and get some more rest. Please." She looked over to Jack ordering him with her eyes to help get her point across.

Jack smiled knowingly, and kissed Irina's fingers in his hand before smoothing her hair over her head again.

"Listen to the smart woman, Irina, she's done an amazing job of taking care of you these last few days." He looked over at the nurse and winked, catching her surprise on her face. "Close your eyes, My Love," He whispered lovingly to Irina, drowning in her chocolate depths. "I'll stay right here. I promise, Irina, I'm not going anywhere." He felt her grip clinging to him and he couldn't blame her for not wanting to be left alone after what she'd been through.

"I want my babies, Jack." She whispered softly again, tears in her eyes as her bottom lip quivered in a way Jack had never seen and it was almost his undoing. He was about to pick her up, tubes and all, and carry her down to her daughters.

Irina felt an overwhelming sense of guilt that this man she had brought into their lives, had done such horrible things to her children. Her fear would not be abated until she saw them, held them in her own arms and determined for herself that they were out of danger.

Jack's eyes quickly darted to the nurse, silently asking if he could take Irina to see them, knowing already the answer but hoping none-the-less. The nurse shook her head 'no' softly with a sad look on her face and Jack quickly turned back to his wife.

"I know, My Love…but you can't right now." He rested his forehead against hers, stroking the side of her head. "Rest for a few more hours…let your body heal. The faster it heals, the faster you will get to see them…ok?" He wiped her tear tracks again softly; kissing their invisible path across her bruised and split cheek tenderly with his lips.

Irina nodded softly, as another big tear spilled down her cheek in resignation when she closed her eyes and leaned into Jack's palm.

"I'll let you two get some rest." The nurse smiled softly at the beautiful couple, feeling her own tears flooding her eyes and not wanting to cry in front of the Imperial family.

"Thank you…for everything." Irina's eyes quickly flew open, giving the nurse a soft smile for taking care of her.

"It is my honor." The nurse gave a slight bow to Irina, then looked at Jack and quickly turned over come with emotion and a tear slipped down her cheek.

Jack ran his hand over Irina's head in a soft caress until her heart rate held steady again at 82 and her breathing evened out as she fell asleep. When he was sure she was out, he placed a soft kiss to her temple and then lips before resuming his position in the chair beside her bed, falling back to sleep himself.

Irina awoke an hour later having the urge to use the restroom with all the fluids being pumped into her and was not happy that she was still hooked to a catheter and made the nurse remove it promptly. Thankfully, the nurse had no arguments knowing that the thing was entirely uncomfortable to an 'awake' person.

After that problem was solved, Irina fell quickly back to sleep and a short three hours later, awoke again and smiled seeing Jack sleeping face down against her bed again, his body bent at a strange angle that was certainly uncomfortable and his exhausted features told her of his own sleepless nights. She ran her hand softly over his steely gray hair and felt tears pricking her eyes as a smile broke across her features. He looked so peaceful in his sleep, like it had been his first peaceful sleep in days and she hadn't the heart to wake him up but was dying to see her baby.

Knowing she would probably be told she wasn't strong enough yet to leave her bed if she called the nurse, she decided to take matters into her own hands.

Quietly and softly, she pulled back her rough, crisp white bed sheets that she decided from now on, would be washed with softener as well, making a mental note to make it a new hospital policy after feeling the terrible texture against her skin. She swung her legs over the side and gasped in pain, biting her lip to keep from waking Jack as she grabbed her side. Her broken ribs irritated by the quick movement.

Looking at the various tubes and machines threaded into her body, she followed the power cords and pulled them out of the wall, having had practice at this before. She looped the cords around the metal stand and used the bed rail and IV pole, to help her stand.

Once that was accomplished, she looked at her undesirable attire. The muted gray material with turquoise star bursts. The back was entirely open and that wouldn't do to walk around the hospital, the Tsar of Russia, with her bum hanging out exposed to everyone she smiled softly to herself looking around the room. Spotting an open box with tissue paper on the chair a few feet away, she pushed the stand ahead of her, smiling happily when she saw the black nightgown and robe.

"_Katya_." She whispered, shaking her head and thanking her sister.

Looking back at Jack, she grabbed the front of her ugly hospital gown and tore it off with one fall swoop, throwing it over onto the bed. She pulled the satiny gown over her head and threaded one arm through the spaghetti strap hole only to realize, she couldn't do that with the other arm without unhooking her heart monitors and IV.

Knowing she couldn't unhook the electrodes without alerting the nurses of her 'escape' she improvised and threaded the cords along with her through the hole the strap created. The luxurious fabric fell down around her slender body and Irina smiled. She was already tired from struggling with the dress and in too much of a hurry to see her baby so she forwent the robe and inched towards the door cautiously.

Opening the door to her room cautiously, she poked her head out looking around. She noted the nurse's station down the hall to the right and the elevators to the left. Seeing that the few nurses who were currently on staff, occupied with other things, Irina stepped out into the hallway, the cool tiles against her bare feet sending a shiver up her body.

She maneuvered her IV stand containing her insulin pump, her IV drip, and heart monitor out of the door with the same feline gracefulness she always possessed and felt someone's eyes suddenly on her. She turned around and smiled when she saw it was a mother and a young teenage girl, who was recovering from Open Heart Surgery by the looks of the fresh incision and staples Irina could see jutting out of the top of the girls gown.

The girl was a mixture of awe, surprise and smiles as she looked at Irina clearly escaping as all patients on that floor were only allowed to leave their rooms accompanied by a nurse or relative.

Irina saw the girl's eyes go to Irina's own scar exposed above her nightgown from her own Open Heart Surgery and her long fingers reached up to trace the scar lightly, looking up to meet the girl's eyes and her mother's with a smile, as if to say, '_it will be ok, see, I'm ok…welcome to the club._' She pushed her IV stand towards them and stopped just in front of the girl, cupping her face lightly and dropping a kiss to her head before backing up and finding the girl's face glowing at her attention and her mother's eyes glistening with happy tears at Irina's kindness towards her ailing daughter.

Irina put her finger to her lips and whispered, "_Shhh_," and then winked at them when they nodded before slipping into the elevators and waving softy at them before the doors closed, a triumphant smile on her face that she had manage to escape. Having been the one to commission this hospital, she knew exactly what floor the NICU was on and pressed the button accordingly.

When it stopped just one floor after, the bewildered people who joined her in the elevator smiled in awe in fascination at their Tsar standing beside them in a black satin nightgown, covered in bruises and bandages and carting an IV pole beside her. Their attention made Irina slightly nervous and she smiled softly at them then looked at the floor.

"Sorry, if it seems like we're staring but we weren't aware you'd awakend from your coma, Empress. We're so happy that you're safe." An older woman smiled seeing Irina's obvious shyness about standing before them in her nightgown and in her current disheveled state. The woman was holding the hand of a little girl, about six years old, looking up at Irina with big blue wide-eyes. "We'll continue to pray for you and your family."

"I just awoke last night and thank you for your thoughts and prayers." Irina smiled softly, nervously pushing the hair behind her ear and catching the eyes of the little girl again. The elevator continued to stop on every floor down, with more people getting on, and no one getting off…even if it had been their stop, they were enthralled watching their Tsar.

"Are you the _real_ Tsarina?" Her little chubby face looked up brightly at Irina, her voice almost a whisper having heard her babushka refer to the beautiful woman riding beside them as the 'Empress.'

"Yes, Sweetheart," Irina reached out gently to brush her fingers across the girls soft cheek, having flashes of Sydney at the same age and remembering her own fascination with 'princesses' then.

"That was an amazing motorcycle chase and jump in Spain, Your Highness. Catching that terrorist…was just…unbelievable." A young man in his early twenties Irina guessed smiled happily from the opposite corner and her eyebrows knit in confusion and her head cocked to the side, having no idea how he knew.

An older gentleman beside him saw her confusion and realized she had been kidnapped and in a coma and more than likely, had no idea of the recent news coverage. "It was on the news, Your Highness." He smiled, giving her an answer to a question she hadn't voiced. "And it _was_ unbelievable. You make us all proud to be Russian again."

Irina smiled warmly, her heart fluttering at his words.

"I have a new baby brother!" The little girl said excitedly and then just as quickly asked, "What happened to you? You got a bunch of ouchies. Do they hurt?" The little girl's childish curiosity got the best of her and Irina saw the sudden flash of panic cross the grandmother's face at the question.

Irina smiled at the small child, knowing how to deflect the questions having had experience and not quite sure how to give her the real answer to those questions without terrifying the child.

"What's your name?"

"Anastasia." The little girl answered proudly.

"_Ah_…that was my mother's name." Irina's eyes danced with light and the others in the elevator car watched the interaction with utter fascination, completely enchanted with Irina. "It's a beautiful name. You should be very proud."

"I am. My Mama named me after the Grand Duchess Anastasia. Was your Mama named after her, too?" The little girl with the blonde ringlets asked innocently, having no idea of the correlation between Irina and her mother in terms that a six year old would understand.

"Sort of." Irina smiled widely, shaking her head and chuckling softly as did numerous other passengers on the car. "The Grand Duchess Anastasia…_was my mother._" Irina answered her softly and the little girls eyes went wide again and the elevator stopped on the NICU floor, the doors opened and Irina dropped a quick kiss to the little girls head. "Take care of your baby brother, Anastasia. I know you'll be a great Big Sister." She smiled and stepped forward out of the doors.

"And you Empress, take care…and give your gorgeous baby a kiss from all of Russia." The old woman smiled with unshed tears in her eyes.

"I will. Thank you." Irina smiled, feeling her own tears prickling at the out pouring of love from 'her people' for her family.

Carefully, she glided down the hallway with determination and many stopped and stared and blinked unbelievingly as she passed.

"Lena Bristow, please." Irina asked softly and pushed her hair behind her ear nervously again as she stood at the nurse's station; having no idea which Pod, her baby was in.

"The Grand Duchess is in Pod 4, Your Highness." The flabbergasted nurse finally managed to answer. "I'll take you down there." She looked at Irina's slightly pale appearance and concern immediately flooded her. The last they'd heard, the Tsar was still in a coma in the ICUS and now here she was standing before them, IV pole in hand and no one with her.

"Thank you." Irina gave her and the rest of the stunned nurses a small smile as the young nurse came around the corner and took hold of Irina's arm, guiding her by the elbow.

She guided her down the hall and into the Pod containing her daughter and smiled when she the first thing she saw was Julian sleeping in the rocking chair beside the plastic incubator.

"Lena." She breathed out softly, her voice catching with emotion and tears pooling in her eyes instantly as the nurse guided her closer, her own heart breaking seeing the reunion between mother and child.

Irina stood by the side of the plastic enclosure as tears cascaded down her face and dripped from her chin with relief seeing her baby alive and breathing. The relief quickly turned to anguish at seeing her condition, the heavy cast and elastic band holding her other arm rigidly against her little body. The bandages over her cuts and bites, the pads over her little eyes, the tubes coming out of her tiny nose and taped to her face, the IV in her little head and the entirely 'too straight' position Lena was sleeping in, completely unnatural.

Irina's body was aching for her baby and upon seeing her, the sensation only increased. It had been over a week since she had been able to nurse her baby girl, hold her in her arms.

"You can touch her if you'd like." The nurse spoke quietly to Irina, not wanting to wake the young blonde man who had stayed by the baby's side all night, keeping vigil and only just recently falling asleep.

Irina nodded, flashing a quick smile at the nurse as tears coursed continuously down her cheeks. Her hand was shaking when she slipped it inside the warm space and touched her baby's skin for the first time. A fresh round of tears springing to her eyes and she inhaled a shaky breath trying not to sob with the overload of emotions the simple contact made.

"Why are her eyes covered?" Irina whispered quietly, gently brushing her finger over her baby's cheek, realizing that Lena was not moving at all or waking with the touch, her alarm bells immediately going off now thinking about the baby's unnatural position.

"The doctor has kept her in an induced coma since her arrival. Trying to give her time to heal. She has a broken clavicle and the only way for it to heal is to lie completely still, which is why her arm is held against her body. That's very difficult for a baby to do and with her already diminished strength the doctor felt it best that he induce a coma and take away the added stress being awake and in such a position would cause the baby. Her eyes are covered to protect her from the constant light." The nurse explained to Irina gently, her heart continuously breaking for her seeing the fresh waves of tears rolling off Irina's battered face while she heard the damage to her baby. "The little Grand Duchess is making excellent progress though and she's been getting stronger and stronger everyday. The doctor slowly started pulling her out of the coma just this morning he backed off on the medication." She smiled warmly at Irina, giving her some good news. "Baby's bones are extremely fragile but they also heal very quickly and Lena's bones are already set and starting to fuse back together. It will probably take a full six weeks to heal over entirely, both the clavicle and humorous. She'll have her arm x-rayed and re-casted every week until then so that the doctors can make certain it's healing properly."

Irina nodded her head slowly, to acknowledge that she was listening though her heart was shattering over and over with every breath Lena took, every glance at a new mark on her tiny baby skin. Her guilt was washing over her like a tidal wave and she couldn't stop it. "Can I hold her?" She turned her head and begged the young nurse quietly. "Please…I need to hold her. Please?"

"I'm sorry, your Highness, but I can't remove her from the incubator until it has been approved by the doctor." The nurse delivered more bad news and felt like she'd been kicked in the gut watching Irina's anguish over not being able to hold her baby in her arms. "I'll page him. Tell him that you're awake now and you want to hold her. I'm sure he'll agree with me…" She smiled, squeezing Irina's hands lightly and noticing the Tsars wrapped wrists, her mind suddenly flashing to the 'what happened to her while she was kidnapped?' before quickly flashing back to the present. "That the best thing for Lena now, is to feel her mother's love."

"Thank you." Irina wiped futilely at her fallen tears and smiled softly at the nurse before glancing over at Julian.

"He's been here all night. Poor guy only just recently fell asleep. He looked so exhausted, though, he was maintaining quite an extensive conversation with the baby throughout the night." The nurse smiled and Irina raised her eyebrow surprised and studied him curiously, wondering what he had been saying to Lena. "Who is he if you don't mind my asking?"

"Her big brother Julian." Irina smiled happily, feeling overjoyed even in this terrible situation that her family was finally coming together.

"I wasn't aware you had a son, your Highness." The nurse looked from him to Irina with wide-eyes.

"It's a long story, but he is my son now. I've raised him since he was a very little boy." Irina kept her eyes on Sark and noticed how innocent he looked in sleep, like that same little boy she would watch sleeping from the doorway so many nights, so long ago. He must be completely exhausted to sleep so soundly amidst all this commotion, she realized.

"Well he seems very special." The young woman smiled, thinking to herself that he was pretty darn cute too, "And he seems like an excellent big brother, very protective. You take a seat in this rocking chair," She pulled it forward and softly guided Irina back into the chair behind them, "And I will get a hold of the doctor, ok?"

Irina nodded her thanks, her hand never leaving Lena's skin. When the nurse had gone, Irina's tears continued to fall as she sat looking at her baby. Her heart skipped a beat when she felt Lena's little fingers wrap around her own finger, like she knew her mother was there. That was the only movement out of the baby and she continued to grip Irina's finger. Irina finally smiled and wiped madly at the continuously falling tears, wanting so badly to take the baby into her arms.

"I love you, baby girl. Mama loves you so much. I'm so sorry…I'm so sorry." She cried softly rubbing her thumb softly over the baby's tiny fingers.

A few minutes later the nurse returned smiling madly. "He agreed. We can take her out. You can hold her." Her smiled widened when she saw Irina's sharp intake of breath before her own smile appeared watching the nurse unhook the incubators latches.

Carefully, she moved Lena's tubes and removed the soft pads covering the baby's eyes and picked her up like she was handling ancient China, placing her against Irina's chest so that her arm was still immobile but comfortable and her little broken arm was bent at a 90 degree angle up around her face with the positioning of the cast.

Irina's warm tears dripped into Lena's soft hair as she gently held the baby, afraid to move and hurt her further while the nurse straightened out the mess of tubes and wires that were coming out of Lena everywhere. When they were finally settled into a comfortable position, the nurse took a step back and smiled at them. Irina felt the heavy weight of her baby's casted arm against her chest but her little body, radiated warmth. One of Irina's hands was protectively across her naked back while the other supported her little bum, she had tucked Lena's legs up under her, as Lena had always done naturally on her own. She leaned her cheek down to rest against her soft dark hair and she closed her eyes, just relishing in the moment of holding her again.

"I'll get a blanket for you." The nurse smiled and stepped away from them, returning seconds later with a white, pink and blue stripped blanket and little beanie cap for Lena's head. "She's been kept so warm inside the incubator, I don't want her to go through any shock at the sudden loss of heat." She explained to Irina as she put the cute little hat normally adorning newborns heads, on Lena. The little blanket was spread over Lena so that just her little head poked out lying on her mother's chest.

"See, look at that." The nurse pointed to Lena's monitors with a smile. "She's already improving just by you holding her. Mama was just what she needed." Her smile only grew as she took down the improving stats and Irina smiled as well, humming softly the Russian Lullaby in her baby's ear as she rocked her.

The nurse glanced over at Irina's IV stand and noticed the readings of blood glucose on her insulin pump. They were reading at 520. Very high, dangerously so... meaning Irina was still _very sick_ even if she was hiding it well.

"You're not supposed to be down here are you, Empress?" The young woman arched her own eyebrow at Irina in realization with fear suddenly striking her own heart at the danger Irina was still in.

Irina's enchanting eyes and enigmatic smile looked up at the woman and shrugged slightly, obviously guilty.

The nurse swallowed her fear and just chuckled, deciding she wasn't about to rat out the Tsar for escaping her floor because she wanted to see her baby. She smiled at the beautiful pair before returning to her station where all of the nurses and doctors were watching Irina and baby from across the room, all fascinated by her interactions with her child, their hearts soaring with love and respect for the gorgeous battered woman who was going to be the official 'Mother' of their country and it was only fitting, watching her now with her own child they decided. The obvious love and strength she possessed was captivating.

Somewhere in the foggy dreams Sark was having he heard soft humming of a familiar tune he couldn't quite place and slowly it roused him awake. His eyes lazily fluttered and then flew open when he saw Irina sitting across from him, rocking Lena and humming while she smiled at him.

"Irina?" He rubbed the remaining sleep from his eyes, surprised to see her awake and sitting right in front of him. "You're awake." He'd gone to sleep this morning and she was upstairs in a coma and he'd awoken and she sat before him, rocking her baby and humming, he couldn't believe it.

Irina saw his surprise and her smile only grew watching him wake up as she rubbed soft circles over Lena's back.

"Good morning, Julian." She paused in her humming just long enough to greet him, then resumed right where she was.

"Good morning." He answered still in shock before a small smile lit his face. '_She was ok._' He breathed a sigh of relief, witnessing yet again, Irina's ability to bounce back. "And Lena is out of her incubator." His smile grew seeing the little baby's head against Irina's chest and swaddled under a soft baby's blanket. "Today is a good day."

* * *

Sydney in her wheel chair, pushed by Vaughn, entered Irina's room to find Jack sleeping face down on her bed while sitting in the chair beside it, but Irina was no where in sight. Sydney immediately panicked seeing the empty bed. Last night she'd gone to sleep and her mother was in a coma but getting better and now she was staring at an empty bed.

"_Dad!_" She called out loudly and Jack jumped from his sleep, looking around momentarily confused, "Where's Mom?"

Jack's eyes darted to the bed in front of him and went wide when he saw it was empty the sheets thrown back and his wife no where in sight.

"I don't know!" He stood suddenly, his heart pounding.

"What do you mean, you don't know? How can a comatose patient just disappear?" Sydney's own confusion fogging her brain while her heart raced.

"She's not comatose anymore." Jack looked at her suddenly, "She woke up last night in the middle of the night."

"She did?" Sydney gasped surprised and then immediately upset no one came to tell her. "Why didn't you come get me, tell me she was awake?!"

"It was the middle of the night, Sydney. You were sleeping and we wanted your mother to go back to sleep which was hard enough to accomplish as she was adamant about seeing you and Lena..._Lena!_" He gasped as sudden realization flashed across his face. "She must have gone to the NICU to see your sister." His eyes taking in the room, noticing her IV pole was gone and the hospital gown lying on the edge of the bed.

"Mr. Bristow," The nurse on duty came in hearing the commotion, "What's going on?" Her eyes immediately noticed the empty bed. "Where's the Empress?" She asked obviously concerned.

"You mean, you didn't know she left?" Jack immediately flew towards the door. "No one went with her?" He shook his head, upset at himself for sleeping through her escape, the staff and Irina and her stubbornness.

"Where? Where did she go by herself? We never saw her leave." The nurse tried to ask and answer sounding panicked. "We would have seen her leave!"

"She was a spy! She's very good at escaping right under people's noses!" Jack answered, knowing that his wife was good at escaping, especially when she was determined. "She went down to the NICU to see the baby, I'd bet my life on it. We wouldn't let her go last night so she decided to go without us. I should've known…you can't just tell her 'no." His flash of panic now mixed with amusement as was Sydney and Vaughn's.

The nurse was still looking stunned and panicked at the stealthy capabilities of the Tsar.

"Well either she changed into the gown that Sophia, Katya and my mom got for her, or she's running around this hospital naked as the day she was born." Vaughn laughed, amused when he picked up Irina's hospital gown off the end of the bed and Jack and Sydney both smiled shaking their heads.

Jack looked in the box and nodded, with an amused smile.

"Yes, the gown is gone."

"Guess she thought that hospital gown was as hideous as I did." Sydney laughed softly at her unbelievable mother.

"But she just woke up from a coma…How in the world could she manage to get out of bed, change into a nightgown and escape all by herself, without us knowing?" The older nurse was still amazed and confused.

"Irina is a remarkable woman with many talents." Jack laughed softly, running his hand roughly over his hair, shaking his head.

"Yes, I'm learning that about her more and more." The nurse finally smiled. "That motorcycle pursuit in Spain was something else…Watching her fly over those cars like that. That was the first time we Russians had gotten a chance to see the Tsar in action…The amazing abilities of a spy we'd all read and heard about now witnessing it, was nothing short of unbelievable." She shook her head in amazement, "Doing it so gracefully in that beautiful red dress, like it was second nature." She smiled wider, "We're all so very proud of her and more excited to see her assume the throne."

"We are very proud of her, too." Sydney smiled proudly thinking about her mother with unspoken awe and admiration in her voice. "Let's go find her and scold her for escaping."

Just when they emerged out of the elevator on the NICU floor, they ran smack dab into Weiss, Katya, Sophia, Bella and Mikhail who'd just stepped off another elevator, all returning to the hospital for the first time that day. Last night having been the first time they actually left the hospital to get a good nights sleep.

"Jack, what's going on?" Katya asked with a hint of a smile, seeing their obvious smiles of amusement and lifted spirits.

"Irina escaped." He replied cryptically with another smile as they all made their way down the hallway.

"_What?_" Katya gasped. "How?"

"She woke last night in the middle of the night." He smiled happily, "And was determined to see her girls. We told her they were sleeping and she needed to rest. But this is Irina we're talking about and when we told her 'no' that only encouraged her more it seems as I just woke and she was gone from her bed. No one saw her leave."

"Then how do you know she's here?" Katya asked alarmed, not hearing him say they'd found Irina for sure.

"I just know." Jack smiled, knowing his heart, which was Irina's and then pointed through the glass windows on the doors to Irina's long Chestnut waves of hair and back as she sat in the rocking chair at the far end of the room behind the doors. "See." He pointed obviously amused and it was good to see Jack smile for the first time in more then a week.

"And she has the nightgown on." Sophia smiled pleased at her Aunt.

"Oh I can't wait to hug her and hold her and kiss her manically for scaring me to death! _AGAIN!_" Katya smiled already wiping at her happy tears and everyone chuckled at the emphasis on 'again.'

"I'll go in and get her." Jack smiled, kissing Katya's cheek as she stood beside him and then winked at Sydney before disappearing happily behind the doors of the NICU.

"Wow, he's happy." Weiss smiled, wrapping his arms around Sophia's shoulders from behind, the two of them definitely a couple now.

"Irina's awake, Sydney's safe and they are bringing Lena out of her coma today…I'd say he has a very good reason to be happy today." Mikhail smiled, happy for his friends.

Jack walked quietly up behind Irina and caught Sark's smiling eyes. Sark stood immediately as Jack approached, knowing he would have to leave as they were only allowed two in Lena's room at a time.

Jack noticed the empty incubator before he closed in on Irina and his heart fluttered with anticipation then thundered with joy when he saw his baby girl nestled against her Mama's chest.

"Hey, you Little Houdini." Jack smiled catching Irina's eyes and dropping a quick kiss to her lips and then Lena's little head. "Your disappearing act scared me when I woke up and you weren't there. Why didn't you wake me?"

"Because you looked so cute sleeping and I know you're exhausted, Jack…you needed the sleep." Irina spoke quietly with a smile, as he stroked the side of her head again, holding her face in one hand so lovingly. "And…I knew you and everyone else would try to stop me." Her smile turned mischievous and both Jack and Sark chuckled.

"Yes, you're right. We would have tried to stop you because you're still far too ill to be running around the hospital. Did you look over here at your numbers by any chance?" He teased her, pointing with his eyes to her insulin pump showing her current blood sugar levels. "510, Irina…that's still way too high."

"Yes, I know…but its better then the 520 it was a half hour ago." She smiled challenging him as she nuzzled the baby's head softly. "And it is going down."

"Irina..." Jack sighed, shaking his head.

"Jack, I'm not doing anything strenuous. I'm just sitting here rocking our baby girl and talking to Julian. I'm not jumping off buildings or running marathon sprints, all right?" She reached out and covered his hand with her own, smiling and clasping his fingers, searching his eyes for understanding. "I needed to see her. I needed to hold her. I needed to make sure for myself…that she was ok."

Jack looked into her big brown doe eyes that had always entranced and captivated his heart, seeing the same desperation he'd seen last night and nodded, understanding why she had to be near their baby.

"And Lena's been continuously improving since being placed in her mother's arms." Sark smiled, speaking softly looking at Irina with adoration and admiration. "It would seem, that they are both good for each other's health as they both continue to improve in one another's company."

"I knew all she needed was her Mama's love." Jack smiled, speaking softly as well, his eyes looking into Irina's before dropping another quick kiss to her lips that even made Sark smile wider.

"I'll go now." Sark moved towards the door.

"Julian, wait." Irina called after him softly, and he turned around to face her. "Come here, please." She waved him towards her with her fingers, still resting on Lena's back. Jack took a step back to give them space with middle curiosity as Sark stood timidly before his wife.

"Closer." She beckoned Sark with a smile seeing his apprehension. When he stood before her, she motioned for him to kneel down in front of her so they were eye level. "Thank you, for everything. For helping me find Sloane. For rescuing Sydney and I from Cuvee," She almost choked on her words, trying to keep her emotions at bay, "And for being such a good big brother to Lena…that I always knew you would." She reached out and brushed his face tenderly with her fingers and watched as Sark's eyes pooled with tears though he tried desperately to blink them back.

"Irina you don't-" He stopped abruptly when she silenced him with a finger to his lips and smile, catching his surprise.

"Yes, I do have to Thank you…and tell you that I love you." She released her finger from his lips with a dangerously loving smile that reached her eyes and Sark's heart melted into a puddle at his feet.

A lone tear rolled down his cheek and Irina moved her hand to the back of his neck and pulled him forward, kissing away his tear and smiling as she held his face in her hand for a moment, just looking into his baby blue eyes.

Sark knew he had to leave now or he would start crying if he looked into her eyes any longer and quickly leaned forward, kissed her cheek and then Lena's head softly.

"I love you, too." He said quickly and quietly, looking into Irina's eyes before darting for the door.

Jack heard Irina's audible gasp and watched her surprise at hearing Sark's admission, overwhelmed in the moment at hearing the words for the first time from him. She was his mother in every sense of the word and had been for almost his entire life and just now, in this moment, Jack witnessed for the first time, the words of love shared mutually between the two.

Irina could barely breathe and a surge of tears ran down her cheeks. She covered her mouth with one hand and stared at a space on the floor, thinking about everything that had transpired between she and Julian and how far they had come. He was her son in every sense of the word, she couldn't love him more if he were her own flesh and blood. Her belief in him was proven true by his actions these last few weeks and she couldn't be more proud of him.

Jack knelt beside her, taking her hand that was covering her mouth into his and catching her gaze with a soft smile.

"That was the first time he told you, that he loved you…wasn't it?" Jack asked softly, still stunned and yet not by Sark's admission and she nodded 'yes.'

Irina had opened his mind to the young man and over the past few weeks he had seen what she had in him. That behind the tough exterior that was harsh and cruel at times, was an honorable young man with a big heart who like the rest of them, had hardened that heart for all these years to protect himself from being hurt…or least 'showing' anyone, that he'd been hurt.

"Somewhere inside of me all these years, I've longed to hear him say those words to me though I knew I didn't deserve them,I longed for them, and I feared them because I _knew_ how he felt. What he'd been craving from me. Something I couldn't give him then." She swallowed hard, and Jack brushed her tears away as he listened. "And now that I've heard those words, coming from him…its like another missing piece in my soul has been filled in."

"You were right to believe in him, Irina." Jack kissed her hand, smiling softly as he held it in his own, and caressed the side of her cheek with the other hand. "He is just a kid in a lot of ways, too smart for his own damn good." He chuckled and made Irina smile, "But he is far too young to have given up on. I'm proud of you, for tearing down his walls and showing him its okay to love… to feel. Loving your family doesn't make you weak, it makes you strong." Jack couldn't really believe he was about to admit to himself and to her, what he knew to be true now. "He's proven himself to me, in Africa with Sloane, at home with us; watching him with Lena and then his actions over this last week. It was his quick thinking that led us to Lena," He smiled catching her surprise, "And Sydney told me that when the fire fight broke out during the rescue and the boxes of explosives went off, Julian threw himself over her to protect her without thinking."

"He did?" She whispered, in amazement and proud, her family really was coming together one step at a time, which gave her hope for the future of a peaceful existence. "You called him Julian?" She realized with a hopeful smile, seeing and hearing Jack's mind change about him kneeling before her. She saw that the once dangerous young man was slowly finding a way into Jack's heart.

Jack smiled having been caught and he shook his head. He had called her on the same thing when they were in St. Petersburg when she first referred to Vaughn as Michael when her opinion and feelings for the young man had changed; when he'd take up a space in her life and heart.

"Thank you, Jack." She smiled, and brought his lips to hers, so thankful for everything.

"I understand and I accept that he is your son." Jack pulled back, looking into her eyes with a wave of seriousness, after hearing and seeing the last exchange between the two, "But if he is your son…then that makes him in a way, my son."

"Jack," Irina gasped, unbelieving at what he was saying, was implying. "You don't-"

Now it was Jack's turn to silence her with a finger to her lips, smirking at her when she finally smiled beneath his finger recognizing her own gesture.

"I know I don't have to, but I want to. If he's that important to you, if you love him that much, then by default I'm going to care about him too…and I'll deny I ever said this if you repeat it," Jack quirked his eyebrow at her with a serious smile, "But the kid is growing on me; in a lot of ways, he reminds me of myself at his age."

"Yes, he does." Irina smiled happily, with fresh tears. Remembering Jack well at the same age and often saying to herself over the years, how much Julian had reminded her of Jack. "You're amazing do you know that?" She cupped his face in her hand, her eyes searching his intently with a tidal wave of love pouring from her dark pools into his.

Jack leaned in and kissed her again softly against her lips, knowing how tender her mouth was from her injuries. The doctor had to place three stitches in her lip, six stitches inside her cheek and eleven in her tongue from where she'd either bitten them during torture to stop from screaming or from Cuvee hitting her in the face.

"Your sister, Sydney, Mikhail…pretty much everyone is waiting outside to see you…to shower you with love, hugs and kisses." Jack teased her, brushing her chin softly with his knuckles. "Gathering how comfy the two of you look here, I know you're not intending on going anywhere anytime soon, so I'll start sending them in one at a time to see you, ok?"

Irina nodded, not needing words to express how much she loved him and his thoughtfulness, how well he knew her.

"But if our Little Peanut starts to open her gorgeous brown eyes, I want to know right away, ok?" He kissed the baby's cheek again lightly, and then Irina's lips, not wanting to leave them but knowing he couldn't 'hog' them from everyone else who loved them either.

"I promise, as soon as she starts stirring." Irina vowed, clasping his hand tightly in hers again with a smile, just as excited as he too see Lena awake. "Sydney first, please." She added softly and he nodded in understanding without her even having to explain. He kissed her again and headed for the door.

Irina needed to see Sydney, to have both of her girls within arms reach, to know they were all, alive, had survived yet again and were now safe. Her mind immediately began to flash images from the last few days, horrid images she had refused to think about until this moment and she quickly had to shut them out, compartmentalize them and shove them back into their box before she lost it.

_'Today, was not the day to deal with them.'_ She said to herself and quickly wiped her fallen tears.

"She doesn't want to relinquish the baby," Jack smiled warmly, "But she does want to see everyone and would like to see you first, Sydney." Jack gave her a knowing smile and watched as his daughter tried to blink back her tears and put on her brave face.

The three of his girls, especially Sydney and Irina, now shared another connection. Something only they would know… another mutual survival that was only going to strengthen their bonds. Vaughn, as everyone else did, knew why Irina wanted to see Sydney first and gave his fiancée a quick kiss on her cheek and then lips for support.

Jack held the door open for her and watched as she wheeled her chair towards her mother and sister.

"Mom…" Sydney called out softly with a shaky voice as she came up along side her, wheeling herself backwards so that they would be facing one another. She smiled brightly seeing her mother's smiling face and her sister snuggled into her arms.


	57. Chapter 57

_**AN: Music for the chapter (on repeat): I Surrender by Celine Dion, Grace by Kate Havnevik, Dare You To Move by Switchfoot, Nothing Else Matters by Scala and Kolacny Brothers, Moonlight Sonata- remix by E.S. Posthumus.**_

* * *

FIFTY-SEVEN

o

"Sweetheart." Irina smiled warmly at seeing Sydney's face and reached her hand out to Sydney, grasping at her long fingers. "Are you okay?" Her eyes immediately started scanning her child's body, taking in the injuries.

"Yes, Mom. I'm okay. Nothing wrong, that can't be fixed in time." Sydney smiled softly at Irina with tears in her eyes, taking in her mother's form once more, taking stock of her injuries now brought to life that she was awake. Her bruises more pronounced and ugly as they settled in over the last few days leaving a horrendous map of Cuvee's brutality prominently displayed over her mother's body. "How are you feeling?" She took Irina's hand in both of hers, careful of her bandaged wrist. She knew that internally, like herself, her mother was a mess but keeping it locked tightly away in a compartment right now knowing this wasn't the time or place to let it go.

Looking into her daughter's eyes, Irina saw the familiar haunting that had plagued her own eyes for decades following her first trip to Kashmir and her heart shattered all over again at seeing the lasting affects that Sydney was studiously trying to ignore, and compartmentalize as she was doing.

"Sydney, I'm so sorry…" She cried softly, clinging desperately to her daughter's hand, her body trembling. "I'll never forgive myself for bringing you into that mess."

"Mom," Sydney interrupted immediately, her voice catching in her throat overcome with emotion as the tears fell, "You have nothing to feel guilty about. None of this was your fault. You had no control over what happened and you did _everything_ in your power to try and protect Lena and I. I can't tell you how much that means to me; how much I love you. How proud I am to be _your_ daughter, Mom." Sydney cried, sniffling as her nose began to run looking into her mother's eyes, remembering looking into those eyes so many times over the last few days when they fought together to stay alive. Looking into those eyes while her mother endured the physical torture she was saving her from. "You're an amazing mother. I just wish you could see that. See what we see." Sydney gave her a small smile through her tears and Irina's heart continued to fall to pieces with a mix of emotions. "You saved us, Mom. All of us. You made the choice that saved Lena's life and then you saved my life, multiple times… pushing yourself physically beyond your limits again and again to ensure my safety. And look at me, Mom," She paused, gesturing towards her body, which was remarkably intact and fairly unscathed for what they'd been through.

The ugly bruises and cuts, her concussion and her mangled foot were the most severe of her injuries, which could have been much worse if Irina hadn't have held back on her screams as long as she did and then eventually passing out, ending the game.

"You got me out of there pretty much unscathed. You took all the physical torture for me, to keep me safe by keeping his attention on you," Sydney sobbed, trying to control herself the best she could and get through this. "I hated that you were doing that. That you wouldn't scream and let me take some of the torture from you-"

"Sydney," Irina gasped, not knowing if she could hear anymore without losing her tightly controlled emotions.

"I know why you were doing it. Because you love me and I bore witness to just _how much_ over this last week. What you endured _for me._" Sydney forged on quietly, seeing her mother crying silently as well. "I love you more and more than I ever thought possible and after going through this with you, I feel closer to you than ever." Her blurry brown eyes sought out her mother's. "You're my mother, my protector…my best friend. You have nothing to be sorry for, Mom. You have to stop punishing yourself for the past and for things that were out of your control." Sydney knew that her mother was continually punishing herself for what had happened in the past, refusing to forgive herself and the things that were out of her control.

"I love you, Sydney. More than life itself and I would have gladly died if it meant I was protecting you from the same fate." Irina reached her hand up and cupped Sydney's face, speaking her truth from the heart. She had been prepared to die for her daughter.

"I know you would have. I saw it…when they drug me out of the torture room and you smiled at me. You knew he was going to kill you…slowly," Sydney choked out, trembling with the memory, "You knew that was going to buy me more time…and you just accepted it…accepted dying slowly by his torture…_for me_."

"Sweetheart-" Irina wiped at Sydney's tears with her thumb, seeing the guilt in her daughter's eyes over it.

"No, Mom, I just…I see now and I wanted you to know…that I will never…_ever_ again…question your love for me," She turned into her mother's palm and Irina inhaled a shaky breath, trembling on her own from hearing Sydney. "Your love for me…is the most powerful thing I've ever felt in my life and I love you, forever and always, no matter what. I don't want you to be in constant fear that you will lose my love for you if something bad happens. I know you always have my best interests at heart," She curled her fingers around Irina's against her cheek, "You have my love, my respect…my admiration, Mom…forever and always."

"Oh Sweetheart…" Irina gasped and pulled Sydney towards her, hugging her the best she could with one arm and in their current position, crying happy tears into her daughter's hair. "I love you, I love you…_I love you_…forever and always Sydney Anne, forever and always." She kissed her again and again, holding her daughters tightly to her chest. They held each other for as long as they could before breaking apart and Sydney left so that Katya and then everyone else could come in and see Irina, talk to her.

* * *

It was after everyone had visited with her, and had left for lunch that Jack finally got a chance to come back in and sit with them. He pulled the other rocking chair up opposite of Irina's placing them side by side as close as possible.

Lena had started stirring against Irina's chest and making small noises as she came out of her induced coma and her parents waited anxiously to see her open her beautiful eyes. She whimpered slightly and then her face contorted before the actual cry could be heard and Irina's face flooded with tears immediately cradling her baby and whispering into her ear, letting her know, "_Mama was here and she was safe now."_

Lena's crying subsided once she realized whose arms she was in and slowly her eyes crept open trying to clear away the fog as she nuzzled her face into Irina's skin and then started fussing again when she rubbed her feeding tube in her nostril and grew angry at its friction in her tiny nose.

The nurse came over immediately and tried to help them.

"Can't you just take it out?" Jack asked feeling helpless in this situation, seeing the baby's distress and subsequently, Irina's.

"Not until we know she is eating on her own, and getting enough calories." The nurse gave them both sympathetic looks as Lena grew more frustrated and Irina started trembling remembering these frustrated cries of her baby when she was chained to the wall and unable to reach her.

Jack saw the flash of terror running through Irina's eyes and realized what Lena's cries were doing to her.

"Well, can Irina try nursing her then?" He stood pushing back his chair and kneeling in front of his wife, holding onto her arm protectively.

"Yes, I guess so. It won't hurt to try. We just have to be very delicate in moving her into a comfortable position because of her broken clavicle." The nurse moved to grab a nursing pillow, and a regular pillow and returned quickly. She carefully removed the crying baby from Irina while Jack helped her to slip her nightgown down and placed the pillows exactly where the nurse instructed him to put them.

Then gently, she placed Lena in the crook of Irina's arm, supported by the two pillows, creating a soft base. The arm that was strapped down to her side, was against the pillow, and her little cast covered arm, fell against Irina's chest, her tiny fingers poking out of the plaster material to caress her mother's skin the best she could in the manner she always had. Her little face nuzzled in and found exactly what she was looking for, _comfort_, in her mother's arms. Her cries subsided immediately.

"Exactly what she wanted." The nurse smiled happily, watching Jack wipe the tear tracks of Irina's cheeks with a smile of his own. She almost gasped out loud when she saw the dark ugly bruises covering the Empress' chest, many in the shape of hand prints and her heart broke all over again for her and for them, only imagining the sheer torment and terror she must have endured.

Thankfully, Jack and Irina were too busy looking at their baby to see her reaction.

Irina looked down at her beautiful baby in her arms and cried her tears of mixed emotions while a smile gradually lit her face, breaking into a full smile when Lena's big brown eyes looked up and caught her mother's, holding them fast.

"Hello, my beautiful girl." Irina whispered to her in Russian, caressing her cheek softly as she always had before they were separated. "Mama's here and I promise, I'm going to do everything in my power…to never let anything like that happen to you again as long as I'm still breathing. I'm so sorry, baby. I hope you can forgive me. I'm so sorry."

Jack's heart was breaking for Irina, watching her beating herself up over something she had no control over once again but understanding there was no way to reason with a parent's guilt over things out of their control, he'd felt it, too.

Lena remained watching her mother intently and then paused in her nursing, turning her head slightly to see Irina with both eyes, focusing intently on her mother's face and then gave her a small and brief smile before nuzzling her face back against Irina's soft bruised flesh, and closing her eyes.

"If forgiveness is what you were seeking, I think she most definitely just forgave you." Jack smiled up at Irina in awe of their daughter and the impossible wisdom and intuition she possessed at only four months old. "All she wants or cares about is her Mama and that she's back where she feels the most safe, in your arms. You're exactly what she needs."

Irina looked from Lena up to meet Jack's eyes and blinked back another round of tears, having spent almost the entire morning in tears, mostly happy ones after speaking to everyone.

"How are you feeling? Are you okay? This isn't hurting you is it?" Jack asked lightly, suddenly concerned looking from her massively covered bruised chest to the baby nursing.

"Never better, she's exactly what I needed." She smiled, honestly not feeling any of the pain she was sure was there; she was so happy to have her baby in her arms, alive and nursing contently she was oblivious to anything else with the adrenaline surge. "I just want to take her home, Jack…and start our life without ever having to think about the Sloanes or Cuvees of the world again. It's really over." She narrowed her eyebrows in wonder as it really hit her, looking from him back down to Lena, brushing her fingers lightly over the baby's ear and soft hair.

_***I Surrender***_

"Yes, Irina, that part of our lives is finally over. But the rest is just beginning as you said." He smiled softly at her, tilting her chin to meet his eyes, knowing that there would be demons still needing to be dealt with before they truly laid the past to rest but they would take it one day at a time. "And I can't wait to spend every…single…day…for the rest of my life, waking up and falling asleep beside you. Watching our children and actually participating in their lives without running interference from the shadows." His smile and small crack earned him the desired response from Irina, who smiled and shook her head softly chuckling.

"I feel the same way. I've never been more excited about today and tomorrow and the day after and the day after that…I've learned too many times in my life, how precious every single day, every single moment is with someone you love because tomorrow isn't guaranteed." She ran her fingers lightly over his cheek and through his hair. "The only reason I got out of bed every morning for the last twenty years, was Sydney. I had to make sure she was safe and then I had to take care of the Russian people."

"You've been living your life for everyone else." Jack verbalized what she was really saying, understanding what she meant and Irina nodded softly.

"And Sydney is safe now from the threat of Rambaldi, and I'm still taking care of my people but for the first time in my life, I want to get out of bed in the morning for me." She swallowed hard, feeling an uneasy sense of guilt wash over her by admitting that. Feeling like she should be ashamed for wanting happiness for herself for once. "I want to start living my life for me. I've never really done that. I'm excited and even a little scared by that prospect, but I can't help it. Having a life with you…and our children, a life not shrouded in KGB lies or CIA missions, just us. You and me, Jack and Irina. What I've always wanted." Her eyes so dark with emotion they were almost black and consuming. Slowly and speaking so softly it was almost a whisper she repeated the words that had plagued her mind for years when thinking about this very thing.

"_Cuz I'll surrender everything_  
_To feel the chance to live again_  
_I reach to you _  
_I know you can feel it too_  
_We'd make it through _

_A thousand dreams I still believe _  
_I'll make you give them all to me_  
_I'll hold you in my arms and never let go…"_

"When I wrote those words, Jack…_this_ is what I was thinking about." She gestured with her hand at the space between them with tears streaming down her face, "Us…a life where we are in control of our own destiny, our own happiness. And we've made it through, Jack. And there are a thousand dreams I still believe in."

"And I'll give them all to you, Irina." Jack whispered his response remembering the lines of that poem the night he first read it and honestly wanting to give her everything she ever wanted; even if she wanted the moon he'd find a way to get it for her looking at her in this moment. Really, fully understanding for the first time, what those lines had really meant to her. "And I'll hold you in my arms and never let go."

She smiled, as more tears spilt from her eyes and Jack found her lips in another sweet kiss that sealed their promises.

* * *

They spent another four days in the hospital before being released. Not Irina or Sydney ever brought up Kashmir and what happened and everyone else took their cues and didn't bring it up either. Letting them decide when they were ready to talk about, and clearly they were already overwhelmed from everything, they both needed time.

Irina was too concerned for Lena and Sydney's health to worry about dealing with the internal demons she knew were locked tightly away in their little compartments, clawing at the surface, trying to come out but she held fast and kept them at bay.

They all had to return to Los Angeles to take care of unfinished business with the CIA. Mikhail and Bella returned to Paris and Katya and Sophia had to return to Italy after the brief press conference just before Irina and the girls were released.

Irina appeared before a small panel of selected journalists from around the world at the hospitals conference room and showed the people that she was indeed, 'ok' and gave a very brief and completely detail-free account of what happened, who kidnapped them, and their current health status. Jack, Sydney, who was now on crutches, and Lena with her little cast and restricted arm and chest band, appeared along side of Irina, though she did most of the talking.

They thanked everyone for their prayers and concern for her safety and wellbeing at that of her entire family and everyone on the hospital staff who did an amazing job with their care, and last but not least, she thanked the FSB, SVR, Russian police, President Putin, President Bush, the CIA and Indian government for their parts in rescuing she and her daughters.

She told them that she would be taking sometime to recover at home and take care of her baby and asked that press continue to respect their privacy during such time and that they would be more than willing and ready to give any interviews and pictures in a few weeks when the Coronation and Jubilee celebrations approached.

Everyone seemed to understand her need for a little R&R after what they'd been through and seemed content enough with what she gave to them. Her enchanting voice hypnotizing them all into submission letting them all leave with smiles on their faces and excited optimism about May.

When it was over, they boarded the plane and headed back to Los Angeles.

When they landed in Los Angeles it was already too late to go into the office. Vaughn had taken Sydney home with him and Weiss and the rest of the Bristow family made their way home as well.

Upon arrival, they found the house full of flowers, plants and get well cards from neighbors and strangers alike sending their thoughts and prayers.

Jack ordered take-out knowing they were all too exhausted to cook anything for dinner and ate their meal in an uncomfortable silence.

Since leaving Russia, Irina had hardy spoken unless spoken to. She answered any questions directed towards her with a minimal amount of words and always offered a small, forced smile trying to ward off any concern or suspicion.

**_*Grace*_**

Everyone could see she was struggling to keep her emotions contained, as was Sydney and the two distanced from each other on the plane. It was as if both were scared they would bring out their demons by looking at each other too closely.

Irina focused on taking care of Lena and doing so was nearly breaking her. She could avoid looking at the damage done to her own body and therefore thinking about what happened but that was not the case with her children. Seeing the constant reminders on their bodies, in their eyes and in their actions she couldn't avoid it this time; bury inside her self, as it was their pain, too.

Sydney still had tremors that occasionally ran through her body and would jump at the slightest noise or touch and Lena would cry if anyone but Irina held her while she was awake.

Irina, for the most part, kept her physical reactions contained having years of practice. It was only when she was alone that the tremors would break through and the tears. Her mind now vividly recounting what happened to them.

It wasn't the physical abuse done to her by Cuvee that was the most painful, the most horrifying to her, she'd been through it so many times before; it was having her daughter witness it and witnessing their torture because Cuvee had wanted to punish _her._

The way she took revenge on the man, so far out of her normal realm now, terrified her to know she was still capable of such things.

Julian and Jack shared brief but knowing glances as Irina solemnly cleared the table acting on autopilot and rinsed the dishes before loading the dishwasher. She had only been able to eat thin soups and broths as the stitches in her mouth in her cheek and tongue made it too painful to eat anything else and Jack was concerned with her dropping even more weight when he saw her idly playing with the soup instead of eating it at dinner.

Ever since she had awaken for the coma, she'd pretending that everything was back to normal, wanting to believe that by pretending, it would eventually be normal again.

Irina wanted to forget it ever happened, knowing it was impossible and still hoping for it all the same. She had everything she wanted now. Cuvee and Sloane were gone, her children were safe and she had her family's love.

'_Why can't I just let it go?'_ She continually berated herself for her straying thoughts. _'You've lived through it before, you can do it again…just let it go.'_ The man was dead and he still had control over her life.

Jack wanted desperately to talk to her about what had happened but was conflicted about what to do. He knew she needed the space and he didn't want to push her into anything she wasn't ready for but at the same time, he felt like he was watching a car accident in slow motion. He'd seen it after she first saw the tapes, and then again in Cairo after she had to abort the Prophecy Child and divulged her secret about losing their son Jack.

Vaughn was having the same thoughts across town watching Sydney in her silence, as they got ready for bed. She too, had been pretending that everything was fine but after they'd left the hospital, her short reprieve during that time, was clearly over with.

Making sure her mother and sister were healing while in the hospital along with the wonderful distractions of her aunt and cousin and Vaughn's parents had kept her thoughts occupied, now they were gone and she was going home to a life that would never be the same. _She_…would never be the same.

When they lay down in the darkness, Sydney closed her eyes as Vaughn's arms wrapped around her from behind, gently kissing her bare shoulder offering his silent support and the tears flooded her eyes. He knew she was still suffering her internal hell and tried to help her the only way he knew how to at the moment, just held her in the darkness and listened to her sniffling and feel her body shaking against his as she cried herself to sleep.

Irina had kissed Julian's cheek, '_Goodnight'_ and then smiled softly at Jack before disappearing upstairs with Lena and a pair of scissors.

She lay her beautiful baby on her changing table and pulled out a new Onzie and pair of button down, mint green, pink and white, moon and stars pajamas. Sadly, and with tears in her eyes, Irina cut the arm sleeve off of both items so that she could put the baby's clothes on over her little cast. Lena's arm would need to be in a cast for another month.

Her collarbone was healing quickly and she was allowed to move it gently but once Irina had changed Lena's clothes, the elastic restraint had to be replaced over her arm and chest. She was a happy and content baby just watching her mother and Irina knew it wouldn't be long before she started to cry.

Her intuition was correct, and Lena was not happy at all at being so restricted in her movements, not able to move her arms at all.

"Shhhh, baby girl." Irina picked her up gently, whispering softly into her ear trying to calm her down as she sat in the rocking chair. Her cries finally subsided as Irina began to nurse her; Lena's little eyes fluttering closed as her mother rocked her fragile body to sleep.

Irina batted her tears looking down at her baby lit with a soft warm glow from the tiny lamp on the nightstand. She continued to rock her long after Lena had finished eating and fell asleep, not wanting to put her down, she kept humming into the baby's ear, 'The Russian Lullaby.'

Jack stood timidly outside the nursery's closed door; hand on the knob taking a deep breath wondering if he shouldn't interrupt. He heard Irina humming the lullaby and listened quietly to her for the last 20 minutes outside in the hallway but her humming had stopped over 5 minutes ago, and Jack knew Lena must be sleeping by now, yet Irina didn't come out.

Finally deciding to enter, he tapped softly on the door before entering. His heart beat rapidly and he swallowed heard with a heavy heart seeing Irina sitting in front of the window, rocking their baby who was asleep on her mother's chest. Her little arm in a cast sticking through the hole in her new pajamas, her other arm bound tightly to her body.

The moonlight illuminated the tear tracks that had stricken Irina's bruised and battered face as she continued to rock. She looked so lost, Jack thought. He smiled at her softly and maintained his distance, giving her space.

"Hi, I was just wondering if you're coming to bed soon?" He asked in a whisper, with a hopeful smile. He couldn't wait to hold her in his arms for the first night in weeks in their own bed.

Irina looked at her husband, standing in his pajama pants in the doorway looking at her with so much love it hurt. She knew he was trying to give her space and she was thankful for that…but at the same time, she wanted nothing more then for him to sweep her into his arms and make everything ok again even if she knew that was next to impossible right now. For as much as he loved her, as much as he understood…_he didn't._

"I'll be there in just a minute." She answered him softly, giving him a soft smile of her own as she ran her fingers over Lena's head.

"Ok." Jack answered moving and then pausing as he hesitated his next move. He stopped thinking and just acted and moved quickly and quietly towards them, dropping a quick kiss to Lena's little head that was nestled into the crook of Irina's neck and then one to Irina's cheek with a small smile before leaving.

Irina smiled sadly as she watched the door close behind him and stood to place Lena in her crib. She looked so small in the little bed and Irina moved her tiny arm in the heavy cast into a position that would be comfortable for the night until she woke to eat again. She leaned over and kissed her baby softly on the cheek, nuzzling her nose against Lena's turned head as more tears came and she whispered_ 'Goodnight'_ and _'I love you'_ in Russian to her. She turned on the monitor and quietly left the room.

She went straight for the shower and when she emerged Jack was already in bed, sitting against the headboard 'pretending' to read the book in his hands. His mind had been running rampant with thoughts of Irina and how to help her this time. She didn't look at him when she exited in the soft towel, her long wet hair cascading in waves down her back when she dropped it standing nude in front of her armoire to retrieve her nightgown.

_***Dare You To Move***_

Jack swallowed hard once again catching a full glimpse of the destructiveness Cuvee left behind in the angry welts, cuts, burns, bruises and stitched wounds covering her body. He was broken out of his reverie when he heard her small gasp of pain as she tried to maneuver the material over her head too quickly and it irritated her broken ribs.

He jumped off the bed immediately, "Let me help you." He stood before her, grabbing hold of the offending fabric that was still laced around her neck and shoulders.

"Jack, I…" She was about to protest, telling him she didn't need his help, that she could 'do it by herself' but at this point was too tired to argue.

"Can do it by yourself, I know." Jack finished for her and smiled, helping to guide the satin nightgown over her body.

Irina cracked a smile at him and he pulled her gently into his arms, wrapping them securely around her shoulders as her head buried into his shoulder. His cheek resting against the wet hair on her head as they stood holding each other in silence for a few moments.

"Sit down on the bed, I'll get your comb." He spoke softly, remembering that Katya had been the one helping Irina with her hair while she was in the hospital. He kissed her head and released her, fetching her comb from the bathroom; he returned to find her sitting stoically on the end of the bed, her eyes looking at some spot on the floor.

She was screaming inside and wanted nothing more then to let it out but couldn't. Years and years of experience in holding it in, keeping it to her self, kept her from letting it go. She was shaken from her thoughts when she felt the comb slide gently through her hair from behind. Jack was being so good to her it almost made it worse.

"Your hair has gotten so long." He commented softly, raking his hang over her wet tendrils with a soft smile, "It's the longest I've ever seen it…Sydney's too. She's growing it out, to be like you, I think." His heart smiled at how his daughter, even at twenty-seven years old, still wanted to be like her 'Mommy.' "I've always loved your long hair."

"I know." Irina smiled softly, thinking about the countless times Jack had played with her Chestnut waves. "It's why I never cut it all off."

Everyone had always admired her hair, even she loved her hair…_but she_ _especially loved,_ that Jack loved her hair.

When Jack finished, she swept her hair off to the side and his eyes darted first to the exposed wrists without bandages showing the multitude of blue stitches around them and then to the burn on her neck from Cuvee's cigarette, both needed to be re-bandaged after her shower.

Before she could move from the spot on the bed to retrieve the items, Jack grabbed them from the nightstand and set to work. He glazed the burn with ointment and then gently covered it with a gauze pad, kissing it tenderly when he was finished and the gesture brought tears to Irina's eyes.

He was trying to kiss her new wounds, as he had with the old ones, and take the hurt away.

With that done, he jumped off the bed and knelt in front of her, gently taking one wrist into his hands as his eyes looked up into her big brown eyes filled with too much sadness hidden in their depths. Softly, he wrapped each wrist in fresh white gauze, kissing each of them as he had done to her neck burn. Gently, he tugged on her arm, pulling her up off the bed and made her stand before him.

With his eyes locked to hers, he moved around behind her, sitting on the bed him self. Irina knew exactly what he was going to do and hung her head as she let him, she knew she had to let him 'help' some how if they were going to survive this together. Her tears ran down her face unchecked as she felt him sliding the gown up her body, and placing the bunched fabric into her fists at her sides.

Jack felt his own tears welling but viciously blinked them back, not wanting Irina to see him get this upset looking at her wounds or she wouldn't let him 'take care of her,' knowing it that upsetting to him.

The backs of her thighs were still covered in angry green, black and purple bruises as well as her hips that bore the unmistakable prints of Cuvee's hands in her flesh. Jack calmed his breathing as he covered the stitches where Cuvee had dug out the letters meaning 're-educated' from her Gulag tattoo.

He kissed the gauze square covering it and then moved onto the burn the Monster had made with his cigar on the top curve of her of her bum . Each cheek would now bare a round circular scar, one from her childhood and an accident with a fire poker and the other from this last trip to Kashmir, an intentional marking of a madman and his believed 'conquering.' Jack covered the burn in the same ointment and placed the bandage over it as well, then gently, pressed his lips to it and let the material fall over her body again.

"Thank you." Irina choked out barely above a whisper, holding back her tears. Jack didn't say anything in response only took hold of her fingers and turned her to face him as he stood before her. His eyes sought out hers as he gently brushed away her tears with his thumbs and a soft smile. He dipped his head and softly kissed her lips.

"I love you." He looked into her eyes, smiling softly, not expecting any response in return, just wanting her to know that he was there, he loved her. "Let's go to bed."

He pulled down the comforter and sheets and she carefully slipped in as he turned out the light. Mindful of her broken ribs, and the fact she had to sleep on her back, Jack snuggled into her as close as possible, lying on his side and nestling his face into her neck over her shoulder; his nose getting tickled by her hair. He fell asleep before she did and Irina lay there listening to his breathing beside her as more tears came in the darkness thinking about what had happened in the past and present as she lay in their bed.

_'He came for me._' She repeated in her mind, taking note of where she was, who was beside her thinking back to a time twenty years ago when she was in prison thinking he would never come for her, she would never see him again or sleep beside him in this room.

This time, he came for her. This was what she had prayed for every night after her Extraction to be in 'this moment' with him that she was now. Irina turned her face to look at Jack's, softly outlined with the moonlight and she smiled softly as fresh tears washed over her, letting go of a twenty year old 'hurt.'

**_*Nothing Else Matters*_**

Irina fell asleep soon after and awoke with a start from a nightmare flashback of Cuvee breaking Lena's bones as she screamed in pain and Sydney begged for Cuvee to take her instead. Her breathing was rapid and she quickly turned to Jack, hoping she didn't wake him and thankful when she saw he was still deep in sleep. She knew she couldn't sleep, not with what was waiting to haunt her in her dreams and cautiously slipped out of bed, needing to see her baby.

She crept into the nursery across the hall and looked over the railing at her sleeping angel as the tears came.

Jack felt the loss in his sleep and woke minutes after, panic immediately hitting his heart in the darkness and feeling the empty space beside him until he heard her muffled cries coming across the baby monitor. His heart broke instantly as he heard the continuous stream of soft apologies from his wife to their baby for the injuries and torture Cuvee inflicted and she blamed herself for.

He wanted to jump out of bed, go to her immediately and hold her in his arms, telling her it wasn't her fault but was also afraid that if he did, Irina would immediately clam up and hide her emotions that she so clearly needed to get out. He remembered the first night he had woken up without Irina by his side when they'd first brought her home after her Execution. Katya had held him back that night on the steps from approaching Irina, allowing her space to work through it and knew he needed to do the same now though it killed him. He lay there in the dark, tears streaming down his own cheeks and listening to her…he couldn't go back to sleep and didn't want to feel like he was spying on her so he rolled over and out of bed.

Jack stumbled softly down the hall and steps and made his way into the kitchen to make a pot of tea. When the soothing tea was ready he poured himself a cup and crept outside, taking up residence on the porch swing, listening to the sounds of the night and looking out into the darkness.

Irina's new Security Detail blended into the cover of night and were barely visible, and he couldn't stop the feeling of sadness that washed over him looking at the new guard, Andrei, who had taken the fallen Yuriy's place.

He had no idea how long he'd been out there when Sydney's Audi, driven by Vaughn, pulled up into the drive and she jumped out, sobbing and wearing her pajamas. She hurried up the walkway the best she could on crutches not waiting for Vaughn and up the porch steps jumping when she saw Jack getting up off the swing.

"Sydney, are you ok? What's wrong, Sweetheart?" He approached her cautiously knowing he scared her by the look on her tear stained face.

"I need Mom, Dad…I can't…they won't…the nightmares…I couldn't…I just…need Mom." She cried hiccupping in her broken sobs as Jack engulfed her into his arms, his heart shattering all over again with the knowledge that his daughter was just as plagued as her mother by the fallout.

"Shhh, Sydney, its okay," Jack tried to calm her sobs as they stood on the porch, holding onto each other as Vaughn stood on the walkway, bare-chested and in his own pajama pants and unshed tears at a loss at how to help. They had left in such a hurry the younger man wasn't even wearing shoes. Just pajama pants and bare feet.

Sydney had been determined to see her mother and knowing she was in no condition to drive, Vaughn told her he would take her, hoping Irina would be able to calm her down…help her get through this in a way he couldn't.

Jack nodded in understanding over Sydney's shoulder at Vaughn, and it was then, that Vaughn had thought about finding Jack awake on the porch swing at this ungodly hour and 'why.' Irina must be going through the same thing.

Irina hadn't heard Sydney pull up and knowing she wasn't going to sleep anymore that night, decided she didn't want to wake Jack and made her way downstairs, grabbing a blanket off the sofa, intending to spend the remaining hours of darkness on the swing.

It was to her surprise when she opened the door and found Jack and Sydney, holding each other, her daughter sobbing into her father's chest as her fiancé stood on the porch steps in his own pajama bottoms with disheveled hair.

Jack's eyes quickly found Irina's and saw her rapid concern at the same time Sydney pulled away from him and flew into Irina's arms.

"_Mom!_" Sydney said in a quiet strangled voice as she spoke into her mother's neck, Irina looking over her shoulder, her eyes questioning Jack at what had happened.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" Irina ran her hand over Sydney's smooth hair, holding her tightly, in spite of the pain it caused her.

"I can't sleep…the flashes…the nightmares…I had to see you…I'm sorry, I just had to see you!" Sydney cried burying her face further into Irina's neck and hair, holding on tightly as more flashes of their torture flitted through her mind.

"Oh Sweetheart." Irina's eyes flooded with tears, her own heart sinking. Sydney was suffering the same sleeplessness, haunted as she was. "It's ok…its ok." She tried to soothe her and kissed her head looking sadly at Jack, knowing he felt powerless to help. She gave him a knowing look and he nodded, motioning Vaughn inside and granting her request he walked softly over to them and kissed the side of Sydney's head as she clung to Irina. His lips dropped softly to Irina's head as well before he went inside giving them their privacy.

Vaughn looked helplessly at them as he went by offering a small nervous sad smile to Irina as he crept by.

"You can take Sydney's bed upstairs, I'll take the sofa." Jack spoke softly and Vaughn nodded, trudging his way upstairs and headed straight for Sydney's old room, flopping down on the small twin bed, knowing his fiancée and her mother well enough now to know, if they did manage to go to sleep, it would be together, snuggled in each other's arms after going through what they had, getting through it together.

Vaughn rolled over and looked at the framed photos of the two on Sydney's nightstand. _'Irina would help Sydney in ways he couldn't and in turn, Sydney would help Irina in a way Jack couldn't.'_ He knew looking at the smiling faces in the photograph. '_This was something they would go through and survive together…together.'_ He repeated his thoughts as he traced their faces in the soft light of moon.

Jack had found a spare pillow in the closet and stretched out on his stomach on the sofa, looking at the framed photo of a gorgeous Irina and Sydney from the wedding on end table. '_Irina wouldn't go through this personal hell alone, this time…she had Sydney, and Sydney had her mother.'_ He resounded what Vaughn had been thinking up the stairs. They could do this, they would do this…and in time, it would only make them stronger.

Irina had guided she and Sydney over to the porch swing and wrapped them both in the blanket she'd brought out.

_***Moonlight Sonata-remix***_

"Mom, its just, now that we're home…I can't stop the images from flooding my mind. I'm trying so hard not to…but they're there…_always there!_" Sydney still hiccupped though her cries were subsiding as Irina continually stroked her hair over her daughter's ear in a loving gesture, snuggled into her side.

"Sweetheart, it's understandable that you would have nightmares about being tortured." Irina spoke softly, her lips brushing against Sydney's forehead as she turned her face into her own slightly.

"No, Mom…you don't understand. I've been tortured before. That's not what is giving me nightmares now. Not what is haunting me day and night." Sydney started to cry again softly, suddenly feeling like a little girl curled up in her mother's arms after having a nightmare and crawling into bed with her parents. "It's the things he did to _you_…the torture you had to endure , that Lena had to go through, that keeps me awake."

"Oh Sweetheart," Irina pulled Sydney into her side more tightly as a wave of tears washed over her eyes again, her throat suddenly dry.

This was exactly what Irina was afraid of. Why she was so pained at having Sydney there, to see what Cuvee was doing to her. Her daughter was so much like her. Irina wasn't haunted by her own torture, but that of her daughters and Sydney wasn't haunted by the acts committed against herself personally but those against her mother and sister.

"I wish I could take it away for you, wish that you didn't have to witness that, go through that. I would give anything to take away this hurt for you."

"There you go again, trying to protect me! Keep me from hurting when, when you're the one that was hurt the most!" Sydney turned on the swing to face her mother, tears streaming down her face looking into her Irina's dark pooling eyes. "_You almost died!_ He almost killed you, Mom! The things he did to you..." She whispered the last part, afraid and horrified remembering vividly what had happened to her mother.

"Was nothing he hadn't done to me before." Irina responded softly, cupping Sydney's cheeks, using a calm voice. "So don't worry about that okay? The physical damage will heal and already is and I learned long ago how to deal with…the other."

"No, you didn't." Sydney shook her head softly, defiantly, yet honestly. "You just buried it."

Irina sat momentarily stunned by Sydney's obvious truth.

"Yes, you're right…but so am I." She brushed another stray tear of Sydney's with her thumb still cupping her face. "I did bury what had happened to me in Kashmir. The entirety of it, for a long time…too long. But, I learned how to deal with the…physical rape…eventually. I'm not saying it didn't or doesn't still affect me, it does," Her eyes clouded over with tears as her voice caught, speaking the truth aloud, "But as it has happened thousands of times, " She gulped looking away realizing for the first time actually how many times she'd gone through it; allowing herself for the first time to admit and verbalize the mental calculation she wouldn't allow herself until now to think about. "I learned to take myself out of it, learned to separate my body and my soul. That they may take my body, but just my body. Do you understand?" She looked back to her daughter, smoothing her hair over her head once more, seeking understanding to a painful topic.

"Yeah…I do." Sydney nodded sniffling, "But what about the emotional aspect of it, Mom? It obviously affected you."

"Twenty years ago, yes. But not this time, at least not in the same way." Irina answered slowly, and shoved her hair behind her own ear, thinking about what she was going to say seeing Sydney's confusion. "Twenty years ago in Kashmir…their torture…that rape…did tear out my soul and left me empty at that time. It was the years after I was released, that I was able to reflect. Mostly, it happened these last two years being around you, your father…Lena. I began to realize they hadn't taken '_all of me_.' The best parts of me still existed through you. I know this is complicated and I'm probably not explaining this well." She shook her head frustrated it wasn't making as much sense when said aloud as it did in her mind. "I guess what I am trying to say that this time, in Kashmir, I knew what Cuvee was going to do to me…and I was prepared. Meaning, that this time, I wasn't terrified of what he'd do to me, to my soul, by raping me. I knew that this time…he couldn't take it away from me by taking my body. That he could take my body but he couldn't take away my love for you…your father…the love for my family and theirs for me, and that was all that mattered; that…and keeping you safe." She gave Sydney a small smile through unshed tears still gathering in her eyes.

"I think I understand that but I can see, Mom…that you're still hurt. That you're still haunted by what happened, I can see it in your eyes." Sydney spoke softly and slowly at first then rushed to finish, fearing she'd back out of being honest if she didn't get it out quickly.

"What bothers me now, what is most painful for me," Irina spoke after a minute of silence, deciding to be completely honest with Sydney, "Is not what happened to me, Sydney…like you, I am haunted by what happened to '_you_'…and your sister. The physical torture you were both put through…and the emotional." With her timid smile she tried to cover her quivering lip but Sydney saw it immediately and her own heart clenched hearing her mother's truth, that she was more hurt by what had happened to her children then by what had happened to herself; a truth she knew was there after getting to know her mother more these last few months.

"You having to watch while he did that to me," Irina shook her head in disgust looking away and unable to meet Sydney's eyes remembering the look in her daughter's eyes when Cuvee first started to rape her. "The fact that you and Lena were even in that situation because of me. I brought him into your lives. I am the one who couldn't stop myself from screaming causing you more pain as he torched your foot."

"Mom! Stop, just stop it!" Sydney's eyebrows narrowed in frustration and pain for her mother. "You almost bit your tongue off for crying-out-loud and then held it in until you went unconscious trying not to scream! You did everything you could. If you're going to feel guilty and blame yourself for screaming then I guess I will too, for not being able to hold out longer. Hold out for at least as long as you did. Hold out until I passed out from the pain." She was goading her mother, manipulating her into seeing 'her point of view.'

"Sydney! No! That's ridiculous! You can't possibly blame yourself or feel guilty about screaming when you were in pain!" Irina stopped suddenly when she realized what she was saying and saw Sydney's cocked eyebrow and the small deviant grin. "That was your point wasn't it." She shook her head, unbelieving that her daughter had actually manipulated her into seeing how illogical she was being in her 'motherly-protecting-guilt-mode.'

"Yes…it was and I'm sorry for manipulating you into seeing it but, Mom…you have to stop blaming yourself, taking on guilt for things you had no control over." Sydney added softly, gripping Irina's fingers in her own as she looked deeply into her mother's eyes, tears flooding over her cheeks as she sniffled. "I told you in the hospital, that same thing but I don't think you really heard me, Mom. So much of what you believe you are guilty of and to be blamed for was completely out of your control. You have no reason to feel as guilty as you do or to carry it around like it is your punishment for the rest of your life. You've done some bad things, but so have I and so has Dad. If you can forgive the things that Dad and I have done to you, said to you…then you must know, " She reached up to wipe the fallen tear that spilt over Irina's lid and fell down her cheek with a soft smile, "That to be where we are today, we forgave you for what you've done to us in the past. The way you came into Dad's life wasn't exactly ideal and truthful but you loved us and didn't want to leave us and we know that to be fact now. Everything after that was out of your control and you shouldn't feel guilty for what happened. We've all suffered from the fallout of your assignment." She stopped, sniffled and took a breath, her eyes never leaving her mother's. "But the thing is, Mom…you have only one person left to forgive for what happened in the past before we can truly move forward in our lives."

Irina furrowed her eyebrow curiously and Sydney smiled, catching her mother's reaction and not realizing whom she was referring to spoke softly.

"_You_, Mom. You need to forgive yourself."

Irina swallowed hard, feeling her eyes drowning with unshed tears she blinked and quickly looked away, out into the darkness as the tears fell silently down her cheeks.

"I can't, Sydney. I don't deserve it."

"Yes. You do, Mom!" Sydney moved her hand and turned her mother's face to hers with her fingertips to her chin, forcing Irina to look at her. "How can you say that? How can you believe that? Why do you think that you aren't worthy of forgiving yourself?"

"I just do." Irina shrugged, not really sure why she felt the way she did. She had carried around a guilt ridden conscious for so long... "I can't explain it so that you would understand. I've just done so many things wrong. It will take the rest of my life and eternity to make them right…if ever."

"Mom you already have made them right and you're continuing to do so by just being in our lives." Sydney smiled sadly at her mother, torn at seeing Irina value herself so little. "Dad forgave, I forgave you, Katya forgave you, Julian forgave you, _your mother_…forgave you. Your father forgave you…the church has forgiven you, your country forgave you… our country has forgiven you…_everyone_ has forgiven you Mom,!_even God forgave you! _Which was obvious when you died and went to heaven. Mom," She forced Irina to look at her again, Irina's head having dropped as tears fell from her chin running over Sydney's fingers, "We love you, unconditionally, we love you. You have to let it go. You've been punished enough for the past a million lifetimes over. Let yourself be happy…truly happy without carrying around this enormous weight of guilt. If you don't let this go…it will only hurt your future…our future as a family. Please, forgive yourself." Sydney cupped Irina's face with both hands, "Realize, that without the events of the past happening as they did…we would not be here right now. If you had not joined the KGB, you wouldn't have gotten your assignment from Cuvee, moved to America and met Dad. You wouldn't have fallen in love, kept him as your mark, you wouldn't have had me. If you hadn't extracted Mikhail, Vaughn and his mother would have been killed, and if you hadn't have left…so would Dad and I." Her voice caught in her throat with emotion. "If you hadn't let them catch you escaping, Mikhail would be dead and if you hadn't complied and survived in prison, you would have died there. If you hadn't formed your organization you wouldn't have been able to get Russia back and take care of the people, you wouldn't have been able to protect me from afar as well as you did or Katya and her family or anyone else for that matter. If Dad hadn't have shut me out of his life, I wouldn't have become a spy, I would have been a teacher and if I had done that, and not become a spy and if you hadn't have been obsessed with Rambaldi, you wouldn't have built the battery that Sloane sent me to blow up and we would never have met again. If you hadn't shot me then, we both would have died. If you hadn't turned yourself into the CIA, we wouldn't have started to find our way back to each other or your way with Dad…we wouldn't have Lena." Sydney took a breath, "Mom, the point is…all of these things, hard or not, have brought us to this moment… with you and me, sitting on this swing in the middle of the night." She smiled, "I know you believe in fate…I do, too." Sydney wiped at her mother's tears with her thumbs, smiling, "You said to me in St. Petersburg that it was all worth it. Well I am telling you, that for me, it was all worth it, too. Having you in my life again. My life, period. It was all worth it. We can't change the past, and I'm not sure I'd want to if it alters this moment, what we have now, but we can accept it, embrace it and move forward together…without the guilt of the wrongs of the past. We can't do that, move forward together, until you forgive yourself, Mom, please."

Irina sat looking at Sydney with wide-eyes. Her daughter possessed wisdom far beyond her years.

"You are amazing…"

"Mom…" Sydney smiled, using a scolding tone wanting an answer.

"I will try, Sydney." Irina replied softly.

"No, not good enough." Sydney shook her head _no_ surprising Irina, "You can't 'try' to, you just 'need' to and let it go! Right now! Enough time has already passed carry this guilt. You need to start living your life for you! And what better way to start then by giving yourself the forgiveness you deserve, and already have from everyone else. I know you've been writing down everything that has happened thus far in your life for your own 'cleansing' reasons. Think of it as starting a new chapter in your book…in your life."

"Sweetheart," Irina smiled softly back at her beautiful, brilliant daughter, "I wish it where that simple but-"

"It is that simple." Sydney cut her off smiling, "You're the one who lectured me on _free will_ remember? Just forgive yourself and stop torturing your soul, please. I would beg you to do it for me, for Lena, for Dad and even for Julian. I can't believe I said that." She chuckled softly shaking her head catching her mother's smile over her reference to Sark as Julian before she forged on, "And I know that you'd do it, for us, you'd do it because I know how much you love us and would do anything for us…but that's not what I really want… I want you to do it _for you_! For your future, for your own soul and sanity, I want you to let it go...You deserve it Mom, you've been punished enough…let it go." Sydney finally cracked as she spoke her last words in hushed tones and her tears broke through the floodgates.

Irina couldn't breathe or swallow, her heart was thundering inside her chest and in her eardrums and she grabbed Sydney to her chest, holding her tightly in spite of the pain as her own warm tears ran rampant down her face and a small smile crossed her features when she closed her eyes.

Hearing Sydney say what she had longed to hear within her soul for so long, that she '_had been punished enough_' and giving her permission to '_let it go_,' was a wash of relief, something she hadn't really been aware of wanting until she'd heard it, knew that it was something she could never grant herself until those who'd she'd hurt the most had found their forgiveness and given it to her.

Her tortured and broken soul had been lost for so long, it was only just now, in the last couple of years being put back together with the love of her family…piece by piece…the last, and perhaps one of the biggest pieces missing, was being able to finally forgive herself, allowing herself to realize, that she couldn't control everything and she did the best she could.

"Ok, Sydney. Ok Sweetheart…I will forgive myself for the things I cannot change…and accept I did the best I could at the time." Irina choked out and literally felt the last invisible chain around her heart and soul; weighing her down, to break free.

Sydney inhaled a long breath of happy relief, holding onto Irina's neck more tightly as they clung together on the swing.

"I love you, Mom. I love you." Sydney proclaimed in Russian and brought new tears to Irina's eyes.

"I love you, too, Sweetheart…forever and always." Irina smiled, kissing Sydney's head then backing up to pepper her face with soft kisses, mindful of her daughter's bruises. "Let's get some sleep, okay? Everything else, we'll take a day at a time."

"Together." Sydney looked into her mother's big dark eyes determinedly that they would face the future together..

"Yes," Irina smiled widely, "Together."

They made their way inside and Irina spotted Jack sleeping on the sofa, her heart melting with love at his 'knowing heart' and loving gesture, having known Sydney and Irina would want to sleep beside each other this night and he gave up his bed, his place beside her, for the sofa so that mother and daughter could have their time.

She draped her blanket over his body gently and smiled at his beautiful face before dropping a soft kiss the corner of his mouth while Sydney watched from the bottom of the steps, waiting, her heart smiling as she watched her parents, continuously amazed by their love.

Irina slipped her hand into Sydney's and the two silently made their way up the stairs and into the bedroom, exhausted. Sydney slipped into the enormous bed on her father's side and once Irina was settled on her side, Sydney cuddled up next to her; her head against Irina's shoulder, carefully putting her arm over her mother's abdomen, mindful of the broken ribs and Irina lay her arm over Sydney's, tilting her head down to rest her cheek against the top of her daughter's head.

"I love you, Sydney." She whispered into the darkness, tears of happiness stinging her eyes in this moment, having her little girl cuddled up in her bed, in this room, with her for the first time since the morning she had been extracted two decades ago.

"I love you too, Mom." Sydney closed her eyes, smiling contently and feeling safe in her mother's arms once more, "Forever and always." She added softly before falling asleep.


	58. Chapter 58

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Fire In The Water by Feist, Life Is Beautiful by Vega4, Home by Phillip Phillips.**_

* * *

FIFTY-EIGHT

o

The following morning, the agents, minus Irina, plus Sark made their way into the JTTF center to begin their' debrief of the events in Russia and Kashmir.

Everyone was ecstatic to see Sydney alive and fairly unscathed though she remained bruised and on crutches. They all asked how she was recovering and how Irina and Lena were doing, a bit of disappointment ringing through their tone that the two hadn't come with them today.

Kendall pulled Jack into his office in the middle of the afternoon to see how he was doing, how Irina and the baby were doing and how everyone was holding up.

"So it's finally over." Kendall cocked his head at Jack, leaning back in his big leather chair staring at the Agent from across his big desk. "I guess this means, with the threats out of the way, you will be retiring from the Agency now?"

Jack nodded in response to Kendall's statement, having talked about it before and now faced with the reality.

"Sydney and Vaughn as well." He added quietly.

"I figured as much." Kendall smirked, folding his hands in front of his face.

"I never wanted her in this life. She's done more than enough for this country, its time for her to live her life for her." Jack looked beyond the glass walls to where his daughter sat in a chair laughing as she watched Weiss clowning around with her crutches.

"I agree. She will be sorely missed. You all will. I just can't imagine the CIA without the three of you." Kendall admitted with a soft smile, he and Jack finally finding common ground over the last couple of years. "You're not going to go join the SVR now or tell them all our secrets now are you, Jack?" Kendall joked with him.

"No." Jack chuckled shaking his head with a smile at how ironic the whole situation was. "Irina is the ruling force…I'm just there to stand by her side, be there for her when she needs me to. Be her husband again. That's all I want. If she's happy, the girls are happy…then I'm happy doing whatever."

"It's all…very surreal." Kendall finally broke into wide smile, chuckling with Jack and whirling to face him in his chair. "Jack Bristow as the Emperor of Russia."

Jack's eyebrows suddenly knit together at hearing his soon to be title for the first time, only having thought about Irina's and the girls before now.

"In title only, like I said, I'm there to support my wife. She's the one the people want, I just came along with the package." His mouth turned up into a big smile and laughed, as did Kendall.

"So when do you have to return to Russia for the Coronation preparations?" Kendall, stopped laughing but still smiled.

"Easter. Irina is cutting the ribbon at the First Annual Peterhof Easter Egg Hunt." Jack smiled wider and chuckled again, thinking about what his life was going to be like from here on out. "Ten thousand kids and over two hundred thousand Easter Eggs."

"Irina Derevko and Easter Egg Hunts." Kendall shook his head in disbelief as he chuckled. "She will never cease to amaze me."

"Nor me." Jack's smile radiated around the room.

"She's going to come and at least say, 'Goodbye' or 'Good riddance' or something, isn't she?" Kendall asked with a sarcastic snort that turned into a smile, hoping that he would get the chance to see her again; see the baby after everything they'd been through together over the last two years.

"Yes." Jack nodded trying to hide his smile seeing the hopeful look in Kendall's eyes at seeing Irina again, saying 'Goodbye' to her and remembering all that they'd been through together. "She and Lena will come in on Thursday…our last day."

The next two days would be spent in a massive debrief on his entire CIA career, part of the Agencies policy about retiring. When that was over, they were all free to go, though they would always be closely watched, not only as former Agents but as the new Imperial Family of Russia.

"Good." Kendall smiled a tight-lipped smile and stood, shuffling his papers trying to curb his enthusiasm. Jack stood and was about to walk out the door when Kendall stopped him, "Jack…one more thing." He realized he hadn't yet asked what he had really wanted to ask Jack about. "How is Irina? How is she doing?" He asked with the up most concern for her wellbeing.

"She's hanging in there. Physically," Jack gulped and looked at the floor speaking in soft tones, "She's healing. Slowly but she's healing. Emotionally…that will take some time, too. Right now, she's more concerned about the baby and Sydney than to think about herself. She's a mother, first and foremost." He smiled softly, shrugging with pride. "She'll be ok."

"I know she will. She's Irina Derevko." Kendall smiled in return.

"Irina _Bristow_." Jack cocked his eyebrow at Kendall and they both laughed.

* * *

"Dad." Sydney knocked softly on her father's open office door when she was finished with her debrief of the events in Russia and Kashmir. "Can I come in?"

"Of course, Sweetheart." Jack jumped up from his chair, moving to help her as she hobbled into the room on crutches. "What's on your mind?"

"Mom." Sydney smiled softly, looking at the framed photo of her stunning mother on her wedding day on her father's desk.

"You had a good talk with her last night?" Jack asked softly, hesitating about asking too many questions not wanting to invade their privacy.

"Yes…we did. I just needed to see her, feel her presence and know she was still alive, still with us. I couldn't stand losing her again." She smiled sadly looking up at her father as he sat on the edge of his desk, arms folded over his chest looking at her with love and concern, nodding in understanding.

"Neither could I." He returned the soft smile. "How are _you_, Sydney?" He asked in full concern for his daughter's wellbeing after seeing her last night.

"I'm doing ok, I think. Last night helped and I think that Mom and I…us talking, helps." She smiled and shrugged, looking back at the photo Irina. "I finally convinced her, Dad." She trailed off softly.

"Convinced her of what, Sydney?" Jack asked quizzically.

"That she has all of our forgiveness…and that the only person left she needed to forgive, was herself."

"You told her that?" Jack asked stunned, he had thought the same thing many times and it was his daughter that finally brought it up to Irina.

"Yes, she's been punishing herself long enough for the past. I told her she's been punished enough for a million lifetimes…she needs to let it go, forgive herself and move on…be happy." She smiled softly seeing the sparkle and wonder in her father's eyes at hearing her say these things she said to her mother. "And I think this time she heard me."

"Oh, Sydney," Jack smiled with pride at his daughter, agreeing with her completely. Irina had been granted forgiveness by everyone but herself, which was the final absolution she needed. "That was exactly what she needed to hear…and I think you were the perfect person to tell her. Grant her that permission she would otherwise never have given herself." He knew Irina well enough to know that.

"I just wanted you to know. Maybe have you help me, to keep reminding her…she's an amazing person…mother."

"Wife." Jack added smiling and made Sydney smile wider.

"Yes, and that she doesn't need to punish herself anymore. She deserves happiness." Sydney wanted so badly that for her parents.

"I will." He leaned forward, kissing her forehead smiling. "You're unbelievable, Sydney. I love you so much, Sweetheart."

"I know, Dad." She smiled, moving to stand with his help. "And I love you, too." She kissed his forehead smiling and moved towards the door to leave.

* * *

When Jack and Julian arrived home later that evening they found Irina in the kitchen, smiling softly and talking to Lena in the bouncy seat while she was making them dinner, even if she couldn't eat it. Irina needed something to do with her idle hands.

Lena was smiling at her mother and making her baby coo noises obviously happy in spite of her immobility as she watched her move about, talking to her in Russian. Irina had spent most of the day resting the best Irina knew how as were doctors orders and she and Lena had a lazy day waiting for Jack and Julian to get home doing many domestic things like laundry, listening to music, spending every moment together just bonding.

"Wow, something smells absolutely delicious." Sark smiled sniffing the air as he entered the kitchen, kissing Irina softly on the cheek before making a beeline to Lena who smiled seeing her big brother.

"I second that." Jack smiled softly, walking up beside Irina at the stove slowly, stopping just beside her and softly capturing her face in his hands, looking into her beautiful brown eyes before kissing her gently. "How was your day, Dear?" He smiled and laughed when Irina cracked a smile and swatted him on the butt with her oven mitt.

"Our day went well. She's been happy all day." Irina smiled happily turning to look back at Julian playing with Lena, making her giggle and him smile. "I don't want to say she's getting used to her immobility but rather adapting well. She's such a good baby." Her genuine happiness for her little girl brought a sparkle back to her eye Jack had been missed seeing in her eyes.

"She is a good baby." Jack ran his hand up Irina's arm and tucked a stray wavy lock of hair behind her ear that had escaped her ponytail. "How are you?" His eyes boring into hers with a smile, having not really gotten the chance to talk with her about last night as they were all rushed to leave this morning.

"I'm ok, actually. Better then ok…we had a really good day." She smiled warmly and rested her palm on Jack's chest just over his heart before her eyes flashed with concern. "How was Sydney today?"

"She was good…very happy and I saw her laugh on several occasions." Jack returned the smile, picking up the wooden spoon to stir the boiling potatoes. "Talking with you last night, being with you, helped her immensely, I think."

"I think I needed her, just as much as she needed me. No. I know I did." Irina shook her head resolutely. "I never got to 'thank you' for giving us space…and knowing me so well." She leaned up and kissed him softly on the corner of the mouth with a small smile. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome." He smiled with a serious hint in his eyes. "Anything you need, I'll do for you."

"I know." Irina looked into his loving eyes feeling his love seep directly into her soul by just looking into his eyes. "I love you." She said quietly, with a smile, kissing him quickly on the mouth before turning her attention back to Julian, and Lena. "So Julian, now that you've completed all of your obligations and full-filled your agreement, what are you going to do?" She smiled lovingly at him as only a mother could.

"I don't know really. I haven't thought about it." Sark looked up at her with a mixed reaction. He wasn't sure what he wanted to do, but he didn't want to 'leave' her already. He was just getting used to living with her, spending time with them and coming home to a _family_ for the first time in his life.

"Well, I'm sure you're probably dying to get out of here, move into a place of your own." She smiled at him and saw the brief flash of…_sadness?_ 'Could it be?' Flash through his gaze at the thought of leaving and she quickly offered him an out without making him say it, "But let it be known, you are welcome to stay here as long as you'd like to." She followed Julian's gaze over her shoulder and found him looking at Jack, seeking confirmation in her statement and smiled when she saw Jack's smile so soft it was barely detectible as he nodded in agreement.

"Thank you." He looked at her, smiling softly before turning his attention back to the baby who was kicking her legs, the only part of her body she could move.

They ate dinner shortly after and both of the men were happy seeing Irina smiling occasionally and meaning it; hearing her small bursts of laughter…she was bouncing back.

Weiss had actually called and invited Julian to come play cards with him, Vaughn, Marshall, Carrie and Sydney, an offer he graciously accepted and disappeared shortly after dinner, with Irina letting him take her Porsche and earning her a brilliant smile from him.

**_*Fire In The Water*_**

Jack offered to clean up while Irina gave Lena a sponge bath and when he was finished found them both upstairs.

Irina had Lena lying on their bed in just her diaper, inspecting her entire body. Her fingers gently caressing the slowly fading bite marks and bruises that adorned her baby's body as she applied the heavenly scented baby lotion. Lena was cooing at her with intense eyes locked onto her mother, making Irina smile softly.

Jack slowly crept onto the bed beside them, lying on his side behind Lena facing Irina.

"It's not right." Irina spoke softly looking at her baby's marred body and saw the question in Jack's eyes. "For a baby only four months old to already have broken bones and scars like this." Her long fingers gently running beside the length of the tiny pink scar and stitches running the length of Lena's body from where Cuvee had cut her with his knife.

"No. It's not right." Jack agreed softly, running his fingers over the curl forming at the top of Lena's head where her Mohawk was. He didn't say anything else and neither did she, no further need to elaborate on the wrongs committed against their' baby.

"The things I did to him…" She shook her head thinking about her revenge on Cuvee, "I was out of control."

"You had a right to be." Jack spoke in hushed tones watching her face intently. "And everything you did to him was completely justified in my book-"

"But that's not me." Irina interrupted his rebuttal shaking her head, "Not who I am anymore. Someone who's capable of that. I was just as bad as him." Her voice was low, fingers skimming over her baby's soft skin and down her plaster cast.

"No, Irina. You're nothing like that monster." His heart beat faster hearing her comparing herself to the maniac who did so many terrible things to her and the ones she loved. "You showed your compassion by having me kill him when you could just as easily…and justifiably, let him burn to death slowly and painfully. You ended his suffering. That," He reached for her face, caressing her cheek, "Is why you are nothing like him. He _would_ never and _had_ never, shown you any mercy or compassion."

Irina sighed thinking and looked away as she gathered the tiny white fabric in her hands and carefully pulled it over Lena's little head, smiling when she saw her daughter's narrowed eyebrow at having the material pulled over her face.

Jack watched in amazement at how swiftly, yet gently Irina was in putting the babies pajamas on with her current injuries. He hadn't dare attempt to dress Lena out of fear of injuring her further.

"Jack…" Irina suddenly worked up the nerve to ask the question she already knew the answer to, but hadn't wanted to ask. "How did you find us? Was it the tape Cuvee sent you?" She wouldn't look at him while she asked, focused on her baby in front of her, smiling up at her mother as she kicked her feet.

"Yes." Jack swallowed hard and his heart sped up in anticipation of the conversation he'd been waiting to have with her. One of his questions already being answered, '_had she known Cuvee taped her rape and sent it to him?'_ "Mikhail was the one who recognized the office as Cuvee's and the building as the prison…and I remembered what you'd told me." He found his mouth going dry and saw the tight mask of controlled emotions on Irina's face as she looked at the baby, blinking slowly as they both 'remembered' what she had told him about the special restraints and how it came true again. "We had Marshall task a thermo-satellite over the location and saw there were indeed people in the building. We left immediately."

Irina nodded softly, taking into account what he'd said and analyzing it.

"So…more then you obviously saw... I suppose everyone has seen it by now, like the last ones." She swallowed hard, trying not to feel humiliated by having hundreds of governmental agents eyes watching her in one of the worst moments of her life. "Not that I can really complain about it…seeing it apparently is what led you to finding us." She added so softly Jack almost didn't hear her.

"No, Irina. There was no reason this time for everyone at the CIA or any other governmental agency to scan the footage. There were not many who saw it, and those who did…only watched to find out where you and Sydney were being held." He covered her hand with his and Irina turned her hand beneath his grasp, holding it in turn and running her thumb over the back of his hand as tears built in her eyes.

"Who?" She asked softly, her dark eyes pooling with tears sought out Jack's, wanting to know exactly who had seen.

"Marshall found the file while I was on the phone with Kendall. He opened it and fed the line to me in Moscow. We'd set up operations in the conference room of the hospital after we found Lena. We had no idea what we were about to see, though I knew it wasn't going to be good coming from Cuvee and we were all eager to see what was on the file; hoping for some kind of lead on where he was holding you." Her thumb continued to stroke the back of his hand and he saw the raw emotion running through her eyes as her mask began to slip.

Irina understood what he was saying, the logic behind it and nodded along with trepidation at what was to come.

"Marshall, Kendall, Carrie and Dixon were the only ones at the CIA and I was in the room in Moscow with Katya, Vladimir, Weiss, Vaughn, and Julian were all in there with me when the footage came across. Bella had stumbled in shortly after it began and went to find Mikhail who was sitting with Lena at the time." He paused taking a slow breath, holding onto her fingers more tightly when she nodded and a tear finally slipped over her lid and down her cheek.

"And where is it now?" Irina asked quietly averting her eyes to look into Lena's.

"I had Marshall destroy the file as soon as we got back to Moscow. It doesn't exist anymore, no one else will ever see it." He reassured her quietly. "No one is going to judge you, Irina. Those who saw it, love you…care about you."

"I don't want them to pity me, Jack…I couldn't stand that." Another tear fell down the opposite cheek.

"Irina, no one pities you for what they saw. In fact, I think almost everyone including myself only saw your _strength_." He tilted her face up to his using two fingers under her chin. "Your unbelievable strength in protecting Sydney through everything. That is what we saw. An amazing mother with an immense love for her child." He sat up and used his other hand to wipe her tears, his own pooling in his eyes. "You were protecting our child at all costs. I love you for that. I love you for just simply being you, Irina." He smiled softly threading his hand under her ponytail and pulling her forward to graze her soft lips with his. "I would never pity you…and neither will anyone else. We all admire you, too damn much." He smiled and laughed softly, rubbing his nose with hers gently, watching her break into a small smile.

"Let's go sit on the swing." She whispered into his ear smiling, pulling him up gently. "I want to talk with you about something."

"Ok." Jack smiled happily and kissed her lips softly again once more, feeling the tickle of her stitches in her lip against his.

Irina scooped up Lena, wrapping her in a blanket and the three of them made way for the porch swing. Jack watched Irina nursing Lena beside him, both of his girls illuminated by the full moon light and he couldn't tear the smile from his face as the rocked back and forth slowly in silence, just enjoying the night and each other's company.

"What was it you wanted to talk to me about?" Jack suddenly remembered what she'd said in the bedroom. His arm stretched across the length of the back of the swing, his fingers playing with the end of her ponytail.

"Julian. I've been thinking about this for a long time now, and even more so after everything that's happened in these last few weeks. It's something I _really_ want." She smiled softly at him and the moonlight refracted her sparkling dark eyes.

"What have you been thinking?" Jack smiled running the backs of his fingers over her bruised cheek tenderly, "What is it that you want?" Already prepared to give her anything she wanted.

* * *

Sark had finished all of his debriefings and now sat waiting in the conference room after being summoned there. His eyes found Irina's behind the glass wall as she made her way towards him and the room, stopping to grab Jack's arm and pulling him behind her smiling at Weiss who held Lena as she entertained everyone with her facial expressions and little giggles.

"Julian." Irina smiled warmly, taking the seat adjacent to him on one side of the table, Jack on the other. She pushed a folder with the CIA's seal on it in front of him, smiling brightly with happiness, "Sign these and you will officially be a free man."

"My pardon papers?" Julian's icy blue eyes lit up, flipping open the cover, scanning the documents in disbelief.

"Yes, as promised." Irina clicked a black ink pen and set it down beside the folder. "You've more then proven yourself worthy of a second chance." She smiled, glancing across the table at Jack thankful for her own second chance at life.

"Go ahead." Jack smiled softly at him, urging him to go ahead and sign his freedom papers.

Slowly Julian picked up the pen and signed his name next to all the 'Xs' Jack pointed out on every page. When he was finished, Jack closed the file and pulled it towards him smiling.

"You're a free man, Mr. Sark." He extended his hand to Julian's surprise and he shook it.

"Thank you." Relief flooded through him at finally being free.

_***Life Is Beautiful***_

Irina slid another file towards him, this one unmarked.

"What's this?" Julian looked up at her confused as to what it was if he just signed his pardon.

"Julian, you've earned your second chance at life." She smiled feeling the tears and fighting them back, "We both have. Now, I would like the chance to be the mother to you…I always should have been." She paused seeing his eyes widen and swallow hard as she grabbed his hand, holding it in her own. "You are my son in every way that matters. Now I would like to make it legal."

Julian couldn't breathe, his eyes watering and not sure if it was tears from emotion or from his refusal to blink or both.

"You want to adopt me?" He finally found his voice and it cracked in disbelief, raw with emotion as he whispered his words staring at her and the file in front of him.

"Only if you want to." Irina held her breath, unsure of herself and his reaction in this moment. "If you don't want us to, I understand and regardless if it's legal or not…you'll always be my son in my heart."

Julian's mind was racing over what was happening and every word she was saying, and suddenly something caught his mind.

"_Us?_" His eyes flew to Jack's in utter disbelief.

"You are Irina's son in every way. She is my wife and the mother of my children." Jack glanced across the table to Irina and felt his heartstrings tugging when he saw her smile and falling tears of happiness. "If you are her son, then in a way, that makes you _my_ son." He admitted softly, watching Julian's refusal to blink staring at him as if he had just grown another head. "Irina believed in you, she was right to. You do deserve a second chance, we all do. Our family deserves a second chance and we are offering you…a _permanent_ place within that family. All of us, starting over together. I don't expect us to have that father and son bond instantly. It will take time to build…but I am willing to go the distance with you, Julian Sark."

'_Surely this man could not be Jack Bristow…_' Julian finally blinked, wondering when he finally did if when he opened his eyes he'd awake from this dream, but no, Jack was still staring at him and Irina was still holding his hand on the other side of the table.

"If you don't want me to adopt you with Irina, I understand that, too." Jack added seeing that the young man was in obvious shock.

"And if you don't want me to adopt you, either, I understand. You can say, 'no.' I will still love you." Irina ran her thumb over the back of Julian's hand nervously, hoping that he wouldn't say 'no.'

"No." Julian said quickly, too quickly he realized when he saw the immediate deflated look in her eyes realizing what he'd said and how she took it. "What I mean is," He took her hand in both of his, tears that were pooling in his eyes now spilling down his cheeks as he looked at her nervously. "I would like nothing more…than for you to adopt me. To be my mother, Irina. The mother I've always wanted." He smiled and Irina's tears ran in streams down her cheeks. "To be part of a family." He turned to look at Jack and then the both of them, "A real family. I've never had that and I would like very much, to be a part of your family." He smiled timidly, feeling terrified and elated all at once over the prospect.

Jack nodded at him with a smile and flipped open the folder exposing the document that would legally make Julian Sark their son. Jack moved the folder in front of him, picking up the pen and signed his name on the signature space under the title of '_Father_' smiling at both the still stunned blonde boy and Irina.

Carefully, he pushed the document across the table to Irina and she smiled as brightly as she had the day Sydney and Lena were both born, tears flowing down her cheeks as she signed her name under '_Mother'_ before pushing the folder in front of Julian.

With a shaking hand, he picked up the pen and signed his name under '_Child_.'

"I'm not really a child." He smiled softly when he was finished.

"You are mine." Irina beamed and she stood throwing her arms around his neck, crying happy tears when she felt him return the embrace. "I love you, Julian. My son." She laughed softly, pushing back to wipe at her tears and look at the little boy she raised into the young man before her.

Jack extended his hand once more and when they were standing face to face and when Julian grasped his hand, Jack hesitated only a moment before bringing him in slowly for a quick hug.

"_Holy shit!_ Did your dad just hug Sark?" Weiss's eyes bugged out of his head as everyone turned to gawk at the three behind the glass, obviously emotional about something. "What the hell is going on in there?"

"My guess, would be that he accepted their offer." Sydney said softly, a small smile coming to her face seeing her mother's obvious happiness over the matter written all over her face. The first real and full-on radiant smile she'd seen from her mother since before Cuvee had taken her.

"Accepted what offer?" Dixon asked curiously.

"The offer to make him an official part of our family." She ran her hand over the back of Lena's head in her arms, "Julian Sark is now technically, our brother."

"Your parents just adopted Sark?" Weiss couldn't believe what he was hearing or seeing and felt like he was in the Twilight-Zone. "You're ok with this?"

"Yes. It's something my mother really wanted. She did raise him after all. She's getting a second chance at being a mother with Lena and I. She wants to have the same opportunity with him." Sydney shrugged giving them all a small smile, almost laughing when she saw Kendall's bug eyes as he shook his head slowly in disbelief looking at the three in the conference room. "And if she was going to adopt him, make him an official part of her family then we needed to accept her choice. Accept him as part of our family as a whole if he is in her's and she is in ours."

"He had your best friend killed." Dixon stated softly, knowing this couldn't be easy on Sydney.

"And I killed his fiancée." Sydney stated just as somberly, looking at her parents with the young blonde man.

"Interesting family you have there, Agent Bristow." Kendall smiled at her, shaking his head.

"Wow, I'm stunned speechless." Weiss shook his head with a goofy smile of disbelief.

"Then how are you still talking?" Marshall asked him and everyone burst into laughter that finally, Marshall got Weiss.

"Wait." Julian took a deep breath, his voice softening when he looked out into the Ops Center and saw Sydney. "What about Sydney? How does she feel about this?"

"She knows. We talked to her about it. Sydney has a very big heart. She's the best person I've ever met and she knows how much I want this." Irina smiled proudly, looking out at her daughter. "She accepts that you are my son. Your relationship with her will take time, but she's willing to work at it. To make our family work."

"Syd, they're all looking at you." Vaughn smiled nudging his fiancée when the three behind the glass were suddenly staring at Sydney.

"That can only mean one thing." Kendall turned his smirk from them to Sydney.

"They're talking about me." Sydney rolled her eyes and then gave a finger wave and a smile to her Mom and nodded in acceptance at Sark.

"I can't believe…that you guys are going to walk out those doors today, never to return for the rest of your lives. That your lives as spies will be over." Weiss felt himself getting a little misty eyed as he looked at Sydney and Vaughn, pulling her into his shoulder. "I'm going to miss seeing you guys everyday."

"Eric…we live together." Vaughn stated and everyone laughed.

"Yeah but not forever." Weiss wrapped his other arm around Vaughn's shoulder, "When the Coronation is over, the two of you will be moving to Russia, won't you? I mean, isn't that required if you're the ruling Imperial Family to actually live in that country?" He laughed seeing they obviously hadn't thought about it.

"I don't know. We haven't really talked about it. I mean, yes, we will live there part of the time…its where my Mom and Dad and Lena will be but, they are keeping the house here in LA, too. Going to split their time." Sydney spoke softly, her eyes meeting Vaughn's, realizing they hadn't discussed where they were going to live once married. "I don't know. We'll have to talk about it." She smiled nervously, running her fingers over Lena's soft cheek.

"Well, if it isn't the proud new parents." Kendall smiled when the three walked up and joined them. "Congratulations. This is certainly a big day for all of you."

"Thank you, and yes. It is a big day for all of us." Irina smiled softly, taking Lena from Sydney.

"This is it, I can't believe it. You're really leaving." Weiss shook his head in continued disbelief. "This place is going to be so boring without all of you."

"It won't ever be the same." Marshall failed to blink back his tears as he looked at the group assembled who were about to leave.

"Sydney, our relationship started with what must have felt like the Spanish Inquisition to you," Kendall paused thinking back to the moment he first saw Sydney Bristow chained to the desk in front of the panel he was leading investigating her as The Chosen One. "I know that you and I haven't often seen eye-to-eye over the years, _hell_, I haven't seen eye-to-eye with most of you!" Kendall shifted his weight with hands on hips smirking at the group as they all laughed, "But you're a damn fine agent, one of the best I've ever known. The others in that highly respected category would be your present company." Kendall shifted his gaze to Jack, Irina and Vaughn. "It's been a pleasure working with you and the CIA will miss your excellence in espionage greatly. Be proud, you served well. You deserve the best in life. I hope you find that." He smiled at her with his tightlipped expression, trying to mask his true feelings about her leaving.

"Vaughn," He quickly turned his attention to the young man beside him, "You and I have butted-heads on more then one occasion, but like I already said, that seems to have been the case with all of you." He stated seriously and then broke into a grin when everyone laughed again, "Most of our battles centered around Sydney. You were always looking out for her, bending the rules to keep her safe and while I can't officially say I 'accept' that," He narrowed his eyebrows at Vaughn thinking back to countless times Vaughn had done something he shouldn't to protect Sydney, "I can say, that I respect that. She couldn't have had a better handler as an Agent. I know the two of you will be very happy, I wish you both the best." He smiled, offering an uncharacteristic glimpse of his softer side leaving them both speechless.

"Jack," He smiled, shaking his head looking at the floor before meeting his eyes. "What do you say in partying to the 'Great Jack Bristow?" He smirked and Sydney started tearing up, realizing what a momentous event this was. "This country owes you a great sense of gratitude for your thirty plus years of service. You're a great Agent Jack Bristow…but an even better man." Kendall stuck out his hand and grasped Jack's in a forceful endearing grip. "It's been an honor working with you." They shared a soft head nod and smile before Kendall's gaze shifted.

"Irina," He released his handshake with Jack and turned to the woman with the baby in her arms, the bruises and cuts on her face doing nothing to mar her extreme beauty. "You and I certainly didn't meet under the best of circumstances and in fact, we made each other's lives hell most of the time you were in our custody." He smiled and she gave her famous enigmatic grin, piercing him with those same intense eyes, that same gaze that went right through him as she did the first moment they'd met when he'd introduced himself after she was brought to her cell. "Even back then, when you drove me insane," He tried to sound serious but everyone else was chuckling remembering those days fondly now, "Your intelligence and skills as an operative were admirable and even envious. You were always a worthy opponent and an even better ally." He smiled genuinely at her and everyone felt their emotions rising watching the exchange between the old adversaries and recent partners. "It has been a pleasure working with you…and your country, these past few months. Best of luck to you and your family." He looked at her then all of them seriously as his mouth twitched up in the corners.

"And Lena," He turned his attention back to the baby in Irina's arms, his hand reaching out to graze her little head as she turned to look at him with her big brown eyes and impossibly long eyelashes. "I've no doubt that you'll be every bit as amazing as your sister and mother. Just please, choose another career path!" He smiled and everyone laughed. "As the only baby ever _conceived_ _and born_ within the CIA," The laughter rose before he could finish and Jack was shaking his head with a smile while turning red and sharing a glance with Irina laced with love, "You'll always be very near and dear to all of our hearts." He smiled at the baby who was gurgling with a smile, leaning her head into Irina's cheek and chin. Kendall reached into his suit jacket and pulled out a new little yellow bear, identical to the one he'd given her when she was born and had lost in the kidnapping; having to throw it away from blood smears. He tucked it behind her little cast-encased arm and chest and she turned her head to put her mouth on it's soft ear immediately, in typical baby fashion, smiling with happiness at finding her old friend. "You're a very blessed baby." He dropped a quick kiss to her little forehead and looked up to see Irina's eyes glistening. Moved by his uncharacteristic words and declarations, and his gift to Lena, Irina leaned in and kissed Kendall on the cheek, shocking him and everyone else.

"Thank you, Director Kendall." Irina smiled impressed with the man before her and how much their relationship had changed, how much they had learned about each other. "Underneath that gruff exterior of yours, you're a real softy and a good man." She smiled her famous melt-you-to-your-knees smile. "Likewise, it has been a pleasure working with you and you should consider Russia your ally, not your enemy." She looked pointedly at him, hoping that the relations between the two countries only continued to improve now that they had established a stable base to build upon. "I expect to see you in St. Petersburg in May, as an ally of Russia, as a guest of mine…and as a _friend_ of ours." She glanced over to Jack, sharing a smile.

Kendall was stunned by her invitation, or was it an order? Delivered under the smooth silk of her voice and charm that Jack had always talked about, her ability to disarm you? He didn't much care if she was manipulating him in that moment, he would be there.

"I will be there, wouldn't miss it." He smiled, kissing her bruised cheek softly and then Sydney's, shaking Jack's hand and Vaughn's once more, even Sark's.

Many hugs, handshakes and tears later, the Agents Bristow, Bristow, Vaughn, Sark and Derevko walked out of JTTF and the CIA for the last time, their lives in the world of espionage officially over. The rest of their lives was just beginning.

* * *

**_*Home*_**

Everyone followed Jack and Irina home to celebrate their newfound freedoms and family.

Irina walked into the room after changing Lena to find that Eric, Carrie, Marshall, Dixon, Robin and Steven had all joined them for a celebratory dinner and her kitchen was now packed with people laughing and smiling as they each set about handling a task in creating their meal. Her house was filled with love and laughter once more, her family was complete and she watched contently from the door, nuzzling her baby's soft ear as she watched the happy people.

Jack turned abruptly from the refrigerator and met her smiling eyes. He walked towards her slowly with an enormous smile, knowing exactly what she was thinking having seen the look in her eyes. He palmed her face with his hands and kissed her gently, earning some hoots and laughter from the giddy crowd behind them.

"I love you, Jack." She whispered to him in Russian and he kissed her again.

"As I love you, Irina. Let our life together without immanent threats begin." He smiled and laughed softly when she did.

The following week, Lena's elastic restraint was removed by the doctors; her clavicle was almost completely healed. Her other arm was x-rayed and was healing beautifully. She received a new baby pink cast and had another milestone when she started eating rice cereal that very same morning.

Irina had her stitches removed and she and Sydney continued to help each other heal psychologically. Sydney had taken up her mother's mode of 'therapy' and began writing down her own life experiences and couldn't believe what a relief it was to get it out by writing it down. She continued reading the journals her mother had kept for her and was continually stunned to read what Irina had been doing during the various years she was absent from her life.

Together over the next couple of weeks, they planned and prepared for the upcoming Coronation and the wedding at the end of the summer. President Bush and the First Lady stopped by the house just a few days after they'd left the CIA officially. They'd come to LA to see Irina and her family as well as visit troops at Camp Pendleton before they set out to Iraq.

Julian was thrown into shock when he came home from a weekend of debauchery with Weiss in Santa Barbara and found the President of the United States and First Lady sitting on the living room sofa, drinking coffee with his 'mother' as if it were an everyday occurrence.

When Easter approached, the time had come to return to Russia. The Imperial Family was picked up by the newly commissioned Imperial 747, '_Imperial One_' blazoned by the seal of the Imperial Romanov Family with the now traditional white, blue and red stripes of the Russian flag. The jumbo jet had taken over as the world's most secure airliner from the United States 'Air Force One,' as well as becoming the world's most luxurious airliner. Thousands turned up at the airport in Los Angeles to see the aircraft when the news broadcast its arrival and everyone came to see the Imperial Family leave for Russia. Irina broke a bottle of Vodka over the nose of the giant double-decker plane, christening it, as everyone cheered before the family boarded.

Lena turned five months old on Sydney's 28th birthday in April and Katya and Sophia flew in from Italy to celebrate and then stay at Alexander Palace until the Coronation.

The Romanov-Derevko sisters and their daughters had quickly become a favorite of the paparazzi when see out and about in Russia; especially Lena who was growing more beautiful everyday and her little arm in the pink cast still of mass interest to the public who was following her recovery avidly.

For the most part, the completely uncharacteristic press maintained their distance and didn't 'stalk' the Imperial Family. Irina and the family in turn, stopped for a few photographs whenever they were out as a trade-off for some privacy.

Julian had found his way onto _Russia's Most Eligible Bachelor's List_, listed as #1 and started to receive gobs of fan mail from women and teenage girls all over the world who wanted to marry the adopted son of the future Russian Tsar. Sydney and Sophia had an extraordinary time teasing him about the screaming girls who would gather in groups and fawn all over him whenever they went out to the clubs.

Lena continued to rapidly go through firsts in spite of her broken arm and entertained everyone now with her hilarious faces and reactions to eating baby food.

They all fought over who was going to get to feed her; Sydney usually won out if she were present at feeding time as she could get Lena to eat the most keeping her thoroughly distracted by making faces and talking to her in various languages always making the baby laugh and smile.

Like Sydney, her favorite vegetables were carrots and she hated green beans. Every time they would spoon a glop of the green veggie stuff into her little mouth her face would contort, eyes squinted and she'd shiver as she swallowed it, making them all laugh. By the second bite, Lena figured out this was not something she liked to eat and would promptly spit it right back out.

_Mama Irina_ was still clearly her favorite person in the world and the only person she wanted when she was tired but her _Daddy Jack_ seemed to hold her favor in the mornings, usually getting up before Irina to take his happy baby girl into the kitchen for breakfast, feeding her cereal until his wife came down to nurse her. This soon became their family ritual.

When Lena's cast finally came off after the six long weeks were up, Julian jumped at the chance to take her into the massive new indoor/outdoor heated pool. Irina whipped out the camera to capture her baby's first swim in her new little swimsuit from her Godfather Marshall and Baby Floatie Ring from Godfather Eric, presents given to her for '_Getting Your Cast Off Day.' _They spoiled her rotten in their absence and called at least someone in the Bristow house everyday to find out the latest. Irina was constantly taking pictures and sending them via-email back to everyone at the CIA, Mikhail and 'Bella' in France, her friends in Russia and throughout the world as well as Sergei and Marcelo in Italy.

President Bush and the First Lady told their staff to mark any 'Lena Updates' as 'Urgent' and pass them through immediately. They were crazy about the baby who had won over their hearts at just five days old, strapped to her desperate sister Sydney's chest, breaking into their bedroom in the middle of the night just a few months ago.


	59. Chapter 59

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): What You Wanted **_**by One Republic**_**, Goodbye **_**by Celine Dion**_**, Mama **_**by Boyz 2 Men**_**, Where's Your Head At **_**by the Basement Jaxx**_**, Science and Religion **_**by Hans Zimmer from**_** Angels & Demons Soundtrack**_

* * *

FIFTY-NINE

o

_***What You Wanted***_

Jack slowly opened his eyes and smiled instantly looking into Irina's beautiful sleeping face. Lena hadn't awoken yet and he was content to lie in bed with Irina, just looking at her. Today was a very special day, one that he, Sydney and Julian had been preparing for, for over a week.

Today was the first_ Mother's Day_ Sydney would celebrate with her mother since 1981 when she brought her burnt toast, a spilled glass of orange juice and scrambled eggs with parts of the shell in them, beaming proudly that she made them for Mommy, 'all by herself,' and then sang to her, '_Somewhere Over the Rainbow_.'

This was also the first Mother's Day Julian would celebrate with Irina as his mother as well as Lena's.

They all wanted it to be special for Irina, give her something she'd never forget. Katya and Sophia had flown back to Rome just for the weekend to see Marcelo and Sergei, and happily giving Irina and her family some time alone on their holiday, though she didn't know it. Vaughn had left them for the weekend as well, going to Gryady for the first time by himself to see his grandmother and bring her back for the Coronation before the masses of people began their pilgrimage towards St. Petersburg and she couldn't get in.

Slowly he reached his hand over and feathered the stray hair off her face and leaned in, inches from her face taking one last long look at her with a smile before kissing soft lips. Her long eyelashes fluttered against her cheeks and he kissed her again lightly. He pulled back smiling as she folded her hands under her face, smiling though her eyes wouldn't open.

'_She was so cute when she first woke up._' Jack couldn't tear the smile from his face looking at her sweet face.

"Good morning, Beautiful." He brushed her cheek again with the backs of his fingers; nestling in again as they faced one another only inches apart. "How was your night?"

"Amazing." Irina finally opened her dark eyes with a smile thinking about the night before and making love with her husband, falling fast asleep in his arms after. "How was your night?"

"Mine was wonderful with you by my side." Jack smiled at her, moving in until their noses touched.

Irina returned his smile and moved even closer until her lips were on his, pausing briefly in their capture then slid her tongue along his bottom lip until he opened wider and kissed him more deeply. Jack encircled her naked back with his arm and pulled her to him as he rolled her body on top of his. Her hair cascaded around them like a curtain and their hearts began to pound with the immense emotion and rising passion.

Lena awoke and started gurgling and making funny noises they could hear through the baby monitor. The sounds became so loud and funny it made them pull apart laughing. Irina sat upright, perched upon his body, looking down at her loving husband smiling and laughing as they listened to Lena in her nursery.

"I'll go get her." Jack slapped Irina's thigh in front of him lovingly and smiled as she rolled off him, allowing him to get up. He pulled on his discarded pair of pajama pants from last night as Irina giggled watching him and trying to locate her own nightgown that Jack had thrown somewhere in the midst of their passion the night before.

Giving up on finding it, she walked to her armoire and found another one while Jack was in the nursery. She smiled madly listening to him through the monitor as he greeted their baby for the day.

"Good morning, Peanut!" He smiled looking over the crib railing as she rolled back and forth on her back, her little legs in the air as her hands clutched her tiny feet, showing off her flexibility. Spotting her Daddy she smiled widely and giggled sharply that brought smiles to Jack's face. "Let's go see Mama, ok?" He smiled talking to her in a voice reserved only for her and he scooped her up. Her little hands immediately clamping against his cheeks and squeezing painful, unaware of her own strength.

"Owe!" Jack inhaled sharply at her little attack and she immediately looked at him stunned until he smiled, and laughed, kissing her cheek and neck making her laugh as he carried her into their bedroom. "She attacked me with that iron grip of hers again." He laughed rubbing his jaw as he passed the baby to Irina who was lying against the pillows of their bed.

"At least you don't have the long hair she loves to get tangled into her chubby fists." Irina laughed just as Lena dove her little hands in her Mama's hair with determination.

Jack laughed propping himself up on his side to watch them.

When Irina managed to dislodged the baby's hands from her hair, she held her on the sides as the baby bounced off her stomach with her strong little legs, every third jump Irina launching her up into the air above her head and making Lena laugh with delight before bringing her back down and doing it all over again.

"She's getting so big, I can't believe it." Jack ran his hand over Lena's back as she perched atop Irina's stomach and chest a few minutes later, propped up on her little elbows thoroughly content to pull at her Mama's, "Mother's Locket" she and Sydney had given Irina on her birthday. "It goes by so quickly."

"Too quickly." Irina smiled sadly fingering her baby's dark hair as Lena tried to get the necklace into her mouth and kept failing but kept trying. She could still remember very vividly being pregnant with Sydney and that was almost thirty years ago; time had flown by much too quickly.

Irina suddenly remembered something she thought about in Kashmir, talking with Sydney and wanted to ask Jack if they ever got out.

"Jack, when I was pregnant with Sydney," She turned to look at him, having his full attention now and a slow smile lit his face drifting back in time remembering, "You used to talk to her, through my belly," She smiled warmly at him, "Before I woke up in the morning."

Jack nodded with a curious smile, remembering the conversations with his first daughter before she was even born.

"One morning I woke up and when you realized it, you clamed up immediately with this look on your face like ,like you were terrified I was listening or something." Jack's mind clicked remembering exactly what she was talking about. "You don't have to tell me what you were talking to her about. It's just that, I was telling Sydney about your conversations with her before she was born," Irina smiled softly at him, seeing his surprise, "And I remembered that morning. Part of me has always been curious to know, what it was, that you were telling her. What was so terrifying for you, to think I heard?"

"I had been telling her my fears." Jack admitted softly, astonished that 'this' was one of those things that left Irina in wonder for almost 30 years about. "My fears of being a father. You know about my father..." He looked up to meet Irina's eyes which held nothing but understanding and love as she nodded. "He was never a good father and then he abandoned us, first emotionally and then physically. I always told myself I would never do that to my children. I was telling Sydney this, that I was terrified I wouldn't live up to my own promise, that I'd turn out like him. I was apologizing to her before she was born for all the mistakes I was bound to make. That I would try my best not to become my father." Jack looked down at Lena feeling himself getting choked up, "But I became him anyway; first I abandoned Sydney emotionally after you were extracted…and then physically, leaving her to be raised by the nannies."

"Jack, you are 'not' your father. We all make mistakes. You weren't the only one apologizing to her before she was even born for the mistakes, I did, too." She admitted with a smile remembering all the times she broke down crying by herself for her failures as a mother before Sydney was even born. "Life happened and things went wrong. But you were 'never' your father in spite of everything." She reached over tracing his strong jaw-line with her finger lovingly, "You loved Sydney even when you weren't there. You were and are…an amazing father."

"And you are an amazing mother, My Love," Jack turned his head propped in his hand to look at her smiling, "Happy Mother's Day."

Irina's eyes went wide in surprise, 'today was Mother's Day!' She hadn't even thought about it, having not celebrated the American Mother's Day since the year of her extraction, avoided it at all costs, drank herself numb for the first 10 years until the pain went away. Gradually, over time, she pushed the day and its memories way down deep inside her. Immediately, tears began to form in her eyes as she looked from Jack back to Lena.

"You didn't realize what day it was, did you?" Jack looked at her with an arched eyebrow and sad smile.

Irina shook her head, too overcome with emotion to respond as a big tear made its way down her cheek and she kissed the top of Lena's head and then her little fists holding onto her Mother's locket.

"I spent twenty years trying to forget this day. I guess I finally succeeded." She spoke softly and her voice cracked with emotion.

_'It was too painful_.' Jack realized and reached over to grab her hand, holding it tightly in his as he brought it to his mouth to kiss it.

"Come with me." He sat up and pulled gently on her hand with a sneaky smile.

"What are you up to, Jack?" She smiled through her watery eyes, flashing him that seductive grin and she stood beside him, Lena in her arms and still trying to get the necklace.

"You'll see." Jack's smile widened and he kept their hands together, leading her down the massive staircase in the palace towards the kitchen.

"Mmm. Something smells good." Irina's nose picked up the scent of something delicious as they moved through the house. When they rounded the corner and pushed through the door into the kitchen, Irina stopped dead in her tracks, tears instantly flooding her eyes.

There before her, stood Sydney smiling with a massive plate of toast and Julian had just filled the last glass of champagne with orange juice for Mimosas' on the table.

"I promise I didn't burn the toast this time, or make you eat eggs with shells in them." Sydney spoke in fluid Russian, the only thing she spoke in country now, feeling her own tears already building as she stood looking at her mother who was obviously frozen with emotion. "And I let Julian take care of the orange juice as I seemed to spill it all before it got to you last time." She looked over her shoulder and smiled softly at the irritating blonde, who was now her brother looking just about as frozen as their mother. "Happy Mother's Day, Mom." She turned back to Irina smiling through her tears, she set the plate of toast on the table and took the remaining steps towards her mother, wrapping her arms around her and kissing her cheek.

One of the only vivid memories Sydney managed to hold onto in spite of her Project Christmas training, was her last Mother's Day with her Mom.

"Oh, Sweetheart." Irina breathed out smiling through her tears as she pulled back and cupped Sydney's face with her free hand. "Thank you." She smiled and cried again, leaning forward to kiss Sydney's forehead. "I can't believe you remembered."

"It's one of the only clear memories I have from that year." Sydney confessed shyly, clasping Irina's fingers in her own, not wanting to relinquish the contact. "I remember climbing up on your lap while you were still lying in bed…sitting on your stomach and singing 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow." She smiled as more tears found their way to her chin and both Irina and Jack were smiling with pooling eyes remembering that morning well. "Every year on Mother's Day after…with the exception of the last two years."

"When you learned the truth about who I really was." Irina said softly what Sydney 'wasn't' saying aloud and her daughter nodded, pained over that fact.

"I would go to your grave…and sing that song." Sydney smiled remembering well that as she got older and learned the meaning of the words, she usually only made it to the end of the first verse before she was sobbing and hiccupping trying to finish.

Julian noticed Jack's eyes going wide and realized that secret Sydney just divulged was even kept from him.

"Oh Sweetheart." Irina pulled her in closer, crying.

"It's ok, Mom. I love you and always have, even when I was mad at you, I still loved you. I love you now more then ever." Sydney smiled, kissing her mother again. "I have something for you after breakfast."

"Ok, and l love you too, Sydney. Every minute of everyday, then and now, I love you." She looked into her daughter's beautiful hazel brown eyes.

"I know." Sydney kissed her again quickly, and took her hand, guiding her to the table. " is your day, Mom."

"Happy Mother's Day." Julian walked cautiously up to Irina, still nervous as he kissed her cheek and felt her wrap her arm around him, pulling him in closer and kissing his cheek with more tears in her eyes.

"I love you, Julian." She whispered over his shoulder, pulling back to look into his piercing blues as she had with Sydney to make certain he saw her truth. "From the moment I walked up to that school in London and saw you, five years old with curly blonde hair, sitting on the cement steps in your little school uniform…a scorned look on your face and tears in your eyes…I've loved you." She saw his lip quiver and kissed him again quickly, letting him go knowing he didn't want to start crying in front of everyone.

He set her black testing kit with a syringe and insulin next to her place setting with a soft smile before taking his seat and Irina had to smile at her family's continuous concern and attentiveness for her health; always doing things without her ever having to ask.

Jack took Lena from Irina and set her in the high chair, pulling it up beside them at the table so they could all eat breakfast together, as a family.

Lena entertained them when she was finished with her cereal. She had started squirming against her restraints and Irina lay a blanket on the area rug next to the table, laying Lena down on it and all watched as she rolled herself over and over, showing off the latest skill she'd mastered. Lying on her back and sucking on her little toes while she cooed happily and then rolled over again to attack her toy turtle with her mouth, gnawing on it incessantly signaling she would be teething any time now.

When breakfast was finished, Sydney dragged Irina by the hand through the palace to the living room and plopped her down on the couch as Jack and Julian carrying Lena followed.

Sydney sat down beside Irina and picked up the remote, turning her body and curling her leg under the other to face her mother.

**_*Goodbyes*_**

"Mom, when I had my regression therapy and remembered your 'goodbye' to me that day of your Extraction, had remembered what you'd said, that you loved me to the moon and back more than the stars in the heavens and the grains of sand on Earth, forever and always…I remembered your love," She reached for Irina's hands as tears began pooling in both their eyes again, "What I mean is, in that memory, I remembered 'feeling' that love. Your love and it was powerful. I knew in that moment, that when you left, you loved me. You really _did_ love me."

Irina nodded wiping at her own tears, and reaching out to catch Sydney's.

"But it was after the raid on your house in Rio and we found evidence that suggested you _still_ loved me just that much, had _always_ loved me, just as you promised. We found the DVDs and when Dad, Vaughn and I sat down and watched them, especially the last one, I knew without a doubt how much you _really loved me_…always had." Sydney choked on her tears feeling embarrassed now for, ever doubting her mother's love. "And how hard it was for you to leave. Not two seconds passed after it was over that we jumped off the couch and started making plans to come find you in St. Petersburg. I had to tell you that I knew the truth, that I remembered, that you always loved me. But more importantly," She inhaled a shaky breath squeezing her mother's fingers as tears ran rivers down both their cheeks, "I had to tell you, that _I_ _loved you._ That I'd always loved you, forever and always." She smiled through the blinding tears, shaking her head trying to focus she forged on. "This film is the perfect representation of the love between a mother and daughter and I wanted to watch it with you. As it was the final spark of reason, that led us to find you that night, that led us where we are today."

Julian had no idea what Sydney was talking about but judging from Irina's reaction and the unshed tears in Jack's eyes, it had to be powerful.

"I would love nothing more, than to watch it with you, Sydney. The only thing that could make it more perfect…" Irina's voice caught and her breath faltered with pained emotion.

"Is if _your_ mother were here." Sydney said softly; a fresh wave of tears washing over her seeing the pain in her mother's eyes; and remembering the harsh reality behind her grandmother's death. Her mother had lost her own mother, because of the love she had for her and her father. "To have Babushka Anya watching it with us." She said softly with a big sigh, pulling her mother into her arms. "I'm so sorry, Mom." She cried softly into her hair.

"She would be so happy for us, Sydney. To see us sitting her, together in a house she loved." Irina pulled back, smiling and wiping her tears. "And I think she's here," She put her closed fist over her heart and then Sydney's, "I see so much of her in you and in Lena, she will live on in you."

"And you." Sydney pointed out the most obvious one her mother neglected to mention. "Everyone, Alexei, Dmitri, Katya, Mikhail…Talia…everyone, Mom, says how much you are like your mother. That you are your mother's daughter." She smiled earning her a smile in return, "As people tell me I am yours and I couldn't be more proud to have you as my mother, to have people tell me that I am like you."

Irina was too emotional to say anything for a moment and grabbed Sydney into another forceful hug, never wanting to let her go.

"And I couldn't be more proud, than to have you as my daughter. I love you, Sydney."

Sydney would never tire of hearing her mother tell her she was proud of her or hearing her tell her she loved her. She pushed play and the song that spoke so much of the truths between the three women filled the room as their images flashed over the enormous screen.

Seeing the video now, after knowing the entire 'truth' that had taken so much time to find, changed the way Jack and Sydney 'saw' it. What had been emotionally touching for them the first time; was now immensely moving knowing what they did about Irina's love for her mother and child, especially watching it with her and seeing her reactions. She held Sydney's hand tightly through the entire thing, crying and smiling in unison as she watched.

Julian, once again, learned a new and greater depth to the love between Irina and her mother and between she and Sydney; thinking about how insanely hard it had to have been for her all those years he was with her, suffering in silence over the loss of her mother and child. He could 'see' the enormous amount of love shared between them on screen.

By the end, they all had tears in their eyes and now it was his turn to present Irina with her first Mother's Day gift from him, the only Mother's Day gift he'd ever purchased as he never celebrated the holiday he could remember with his biological mother as she never cared to be one.

Dmitri nodded at him from the doorway with a smile and then disappeared again before Irina could see him.

"I guess I am up." Julian smiled nervously at the tear-streaked faces before him. Slowly he stood from his space on the chair; shifting Lena in his arm he walked toward Irina and held his hand out to her.

When she took hold of it with curious dark eyes, he knelt down before her on the couch and jack and Sydney watched the interaction with rapt fascination, seeing Julian physically trembling with his nervousness and having no idea what he'd planned.

Irina felt him trembling and closed both her hands over his one finding his eyes with her warm gaze trying to comfort him seeing how nervous he was.

"You truly are the only mother I have ever known and this holiday, a celebration of Mothers, is very important to me. I have never celebrated the occasion before; I have never had a reason to." Julian swallowed hard determined to keep looking into her eyes when he said this. "You have given me a reason and this day will always be sacred to me. As your son, celebrating it with you for the first time, I wanted to give you something from me. I wanted to tell you how much you've meant to me in the past, how much you mean to me now. So taking a page from your book," He smirked, "I wrote it down. I wanted to give you something that would last." He stood pulling on her hand gently and Irina stood following him, now extremely curious and nervous as Jack and Sydney followed them to the Throne room.

The couch had been turned to face the grand piano and Julian guided her in to sit front center, her hand still clutched in his as he knelt down in front of her again, Lena hanging on to his ear and throat with her little hands.

When he looked at her, she saw the massive wells of unshed tears in his eyes.

"Because I was not blessed with the brilliant singing voice that you and Sydney possess," His eyes flitted to Sydney who was smiling softly, "I had to locate someone else to do the honors. Using the powers of persuasion," He smirked again and Irina smiled with the same curious eyes, holding her breath, "Along with the reasoning behind the words, you…I found the perfect people out of many volunteers to sing you my gift."

Suddenly, a group of men followed by Dmitri entered the room behind them smiling as they took their place in front of the family. One of them sat down at the piano and waited for his cue.

Sydney's brain was racing a million miles an hour trying to place the faces and when she did her eyes went wide and she inhaled sharply, looking down at Julian with utter amazement. The singers, were some of her high school and college favorites: _Boyz 2 Men_. She and Francie would spend countless hours listening to the same songs on repeat, using one of their songs as their anthem for every single relationship they'd been in.

Julian speaking again, broke her through her amazed state.

"Happy Mother's Day, Mama. I love you." He said barely above a whisper looking directly into Irina's eyes as her tears flooded over her eyes and fell rapidly down her cheeks hearing him address her directly as his mother for the first time.

He'd forgone the American and British names of mothers of _Mom_ and _Mum_ and decided on the Russian instead as she had raised him primarily in Russia and it was the language of her heart. While Irina was too stunned to react, he leaned up and kissed her cheek quickly, his own tears falling as he took a seat beside her with Lena and motioned the group to begin his song.

_***Mama***_

Seeing the look on Irina's face after just the first line, Jack walked behind her and wrapped his arms around Irina's shoulders from behind the couch, kneeling down just enough to wrap her in his embrace tightly and pull her back against him and the couch, nuzzling his face against hers as she was overcome with emotion. He wasn't sure she was even breathing.

Irina couldn't believe what she was hearing as she listened intently, hearing certain things that sparked memories from her past with Julian and now hearing how he had felt about her in those moments…felt about her all along. He had written the most beautiful things about her…

Sydney and Jack were equally stunned listening to the lyrics of the song written by Julian, about his time and relationship with Irina and how he really felt about her then and now. It was eye opening in a way they never thought possible. But it was true what he was saying, '_loving her was like food to his soul'._ By loving Irina, being free to love her over these last few months and receiving it from her, was nurturing his soul, healing it, showing him and them he still had one. By loving her, he was growing. His soul was growing and capacity for love. Loving Irina, really was the food to his soul.

When it was over, the tears once again flowed freely from Irina and Sydney's eyes and Irina grabbed Julian into her arms, holding him tightly.

"You wrote that?" She pulled back looking into his eyes with her intense brown ones, her hand framing his face, "You wrote that for me? About me?" Irina couldn't believe it, still in shock.

"Yes." Julian nodded smiling, "I did not write the music of course, that is their genius not mine." He looked over at the group of singers with a big smile, "But I did write the lyrics and I meant every word. You are the food to my soul." He smiled with a hint of a tease at his word choice, knowing she would understand his life-long obsession with food. "I wouldn't be here today without you. Who I am _now_, without you."

"Oh Julian," She gasped and hugged him again as more tears flowed from her already red eyes. "That was beautiful. Unbelievably beautiful."

"Yes, it was." Sydney admitted softly behind them with a small smile and tears in her eyes.

Lena reached for Irina and she took her baby in her arms, snuggling her tightly and then pulling Julian and Sydney to her, hugging them all at the same time, for the first time.

Sydney and Julian forgetting any awkwardness the closeness might have normally brought to them and wrapped their arms around each other and Irina in order to sandwich her and Lena between them, knowing this was about their mother and never thinking otherwise.

"This is the best Mother's Day of my life. Thank you, all of you, for being everything I've always needed. And yes, that's '_need_,' not '_want_." She laughed softly and so did they, all having been well versed in Irina's lesson of the difference between need and want.

* * *

The following morning they had to travel to Moscow to take care of some last minute legal doctrines that needed to be signed to finish the shift in power from a democracy to a monarchy again. This was also the first time that Jack and Sydney had been inside the Kremlin outside of CIA missions, the first time ever seeing its hidden depths.

Lights of flashes went off on hundreds of cameras as Irina picked up the pen cast in pure gold and diamonds to sign the last of the documents, the official documents proclaiming her the legal Tsar of all Imperial Russia having been signed by every member of the Cabinet, the new Parliament, Vladimir as the former President and now Prime Minister. She smiled and with swift and elegant penmanship legally claimed the thrown of a now Imperial Russia. All that was left was the official Coronation in three short days.

Irina was flawless in the front of her cabinet and the public and press and if Jack hadn't have been married to her, known her as well as he did, he too would have missed the one, very brief moment when Irina's hand shook as she took hold of the pen before reigning in her control.

Inside, Jack knew it was all really finally starting to sink if for her. She was nervous. Something he'd rarely seen and doubted few had ever. He and Sydney and Julian, the entire family were obviously nervous but Irina…she was the one they counted on not to be in her confidence; after all, she had been the ruler of Russia for years now.

Irina could feel Jack's eyes on her as she finished strapping Lena back into her car seat on board the plane from Moscow back to St. Petersburg. He knew her too well, knew she was a nervous wreck inside starting to unravel.

"Are you ok?" He asked softly, sliding into the seat beside them, clamping his hand down on her upper arm softly.

"Yes. I'm fine." She answered too quickly and not convincingly enough obviously when Jack cocked his head and arched his eyebrow at her, "Ok, I will be fine, is that better?" She breathed out quickly, agitated at herself for both being nervous and then snapping at her husband who was just concerned. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you." She gave him her sorrowful doe eyes at the same time Lena turned her attention to him with the same eyes, listening intently to her parents.

"I know you didn't. I love you. I just wanted to say that I love you." He smiled softly, leaning in to brush her lips softly with his own feeling the tension leave her body for just a second before it came rushing back when he started to pull away.

"I love you, too. I just…this is all," She couldn't find the right words to say, something that rarely happened and only added to the confirming fact of her inner turmoil to Jack.

"Overwhelming?" He found the word and she nodded with a soft smile.

"Irina. Jack." Vladimir and his wife came to sit by them, riding on the plane with them for the Coronation.

Their family was going to be staying at Alexandria for the next few days and then at Peterhof with all the other foreign leaders, royal families and dignitaries who were already arriving for the celebration.

"She's just the perfect baby." He smiled looking over at Lena who was smiling contently at her mother in her car seat, snuggled under her blanket and already wearing her pajamas in this late hour.

"No arguments from me." Irina smiled happily, the stress leaving her temporarily looking down at her smiling Angel.

"She's just such a happy little traveler! Our girls were always screaming their heads off on flights. You're very lucky." Putin smiled running his finger over Lena's cheek getting her to smile.

"Yes, we are very blessed." Irina reached for Jack's hand and threaded their fingers with a smile. "Very blessed." She repeated softly looking from Lena who had now seized her finger to Jack thinking about their life and where they were now. They had gone through some of the worst tragedies and yet also received some of the greatest blessings…such was life.

By the time they arrived in St. Petersburg, it was late and driving home, they were amazed to see the thousands of people already lining the streets, sleeping outdoors just to get 'good seats' for when the Coronation procession went by.

Irina's eyes were held steadfast to the crowds in the dark looking through her tinted windows of the limo but only for a few minutes before it became over powering and she turned away, forcing back any tears.

Being the ever-brilliant hostess, Irina showed them to their rooms and greeted those who'd arrived in her absence. Mikhail and Amelie had just arrived as well as Vaughn returning with his grandmother, uncle and aunt and cousins, all staying under her roof.

She sat up with them for a while after putting Lena to sleep in her nursery hearing the beautiful tale of the long awaited introduction of Amelie to Mikhail's mother and family.

Katya, Marcelo, Sergei and Sophia had all flown to Moscow to be present at the signing; their presence required as official members of the First Imperial Family.

Those coming from America, including the President, First Lady and their daughters, and numerous other government officials all arrived in the morning with the First Family also staying at Alexander.

"_Holy shit…_" Kendall gaped quietly as the limo rolled by the millions of people already lining the streets for miles and miles as they made their way to the palace. He had flown in with Devlin and his wife, Weiss, Carrie, Marshal, Dixon and his children who were leaving the country for the very first time in their lives and over ecstatic at being a 'special guest' of the Imperial family.

The CIA had sent a Director Chase to take over JTTF while the majority of its agents attended the Coronation of a former prisoner and #6 on the Most Wanted List, something all of them found ironic.

"Oh wait 'til you see the palace." Weiss raised his eyebrows at Kendall grinning, thoroughly enjoying seeing his boss blanching at the scene before him. When the giant gates opened and thunderous rounds of cheering and clapping went up signifying to the people at least, that important people to the Tsar were arriving.

"Oh wow, Dad! Look at the size of this place! That's the biggest house I've ever seen!" Steven gushed with his face plastered against the limo's window when they pulled into the circular drive.

"You said it kid." Kendall couldn't believe what he was seeing, it literally was the biggest house he'd ever seen.

"They live here? They really, _really_ live here, Daddy? Sydney and Irina really live here? This is Irina's castle?" Robin asked excitedly practically bouncing on her knees.

"One of many." Marshall smiled his famous grin nodding madly at the young girl.

"Yes, Pumpkin, this is where Irina lives and now. The whole family." Dixon smiled at his children's excitement feeling it to.

"This is just so…_surreal_." Kendall stepped out of the limo, staring up at the enormous palace before him and to the massive grounds surrounding it. "All the time we were looking for her…never would have thought to look for her here."

"That's because we had no idea who the hell she was! Who could have guessed that Irina Derevko would turn out to be Anastasia Romanov's daughter and heir to the throne of Russia?" Weiss laughed at Kendall as they followed the men in uniform to the house carrying their baggage.

"When dealing with Irina, we should have exhausted every possible scenario." Kendall stated seriously with brows knit.

"Well, it doesn't much matter now does it? Look at where we are and why we're here?" Weiss slapped him on the back when they stepped into the massive foyer and he heard Kendall, Dixon and Carrie's collective gasps when they looked around. "And to think she gave all this up, turning herself into the CIA and that tiny glass cell for almost a year. You wouldn't even give her a friggin' pillow and blanket and now she's invited you to stay here, in her Imperial Palace sleeping on Egyptian Cotton with a massive thread count that feels like you're sleeping on 'butta." He laughed using his best Jersey accent in the slang.

"Eric!" Sophia came out of her room and saw him below and took off running down the hall and enormous staircase, launching herself into his arms kissing him deeply until Dixon coughed smirking, reminding them there were children present and it was suddenly climbing past PG-13 into R-Rated with the hand grabbing.

"Sorry." Sophia apologized while Weiss stood there trying to get his breath back after the incredible kiss, "I haven't seen him since he left Moscow two months ago…phone calls and web cams aren't enough."

"No they're a tease." Weiss muttered under his breath thinking about her 'live' stripteases for him over their web cam connection ala 'American Pie,' and grabbed his side when Sophia nudged him with her elbow.

"Hey, those are some faces I think I used to know!" Vaughn called out with a big smile as he, Sydney, and Jack came in from the kitchen.

"Like you could forget! We lived together for years and suddenly you're gone two months and about to marry some gorgeous Grand Duchess, move into a palace and you forget us little people! All those times I fed your dog!" Weiss huffed like he was mad and Vaughn laughed, grabbing him into a bear hug.

"I missed you, too, Buddy." Vaughn punched him in the arm making him wince before he moved on to greet the others.

"Where is everyone? Lena? I am dying to see her!" Carrie squealed with a smile, "She looks like she's gotten so big in the pictures Irina sends."

"She has. You won't believe it when you see her." Sydney smiled happily. "She's in the garden with President Bush, the First Lady, the Putins and Vaughn's parents. Katya is showing them around. I have no idea where anyone else is. I don't even know where Mom is. Do you know, Dad?" She turned to look at him and everyone else zeroed in on him as well.

"I have no idea. She disappeared about a half hour ago from the kitchen and I haven't seen her since." Jack shrugged with a soft smile.

Just as he said that, Irina opened the door to their room and came thundering down the steps looking at the ground obviously distracted by something, wasn't hard to guess what and everyone else, distracted by her…or rather her outfit.

She was dressed completely in black. To be specific, a black satin motor-cross outfit bearing the FOX logo on the pants and top with matching boots looking completely sexy. Suddenly she looked up when she hit the bottom of the stairs and saw the group of people staring at her.

"Oh…Hello. Welcome." She smiled pulling out a pair of gloves from her back pocket and pulled them on. "I'm so happy that you could all join us. Please make yourselves at home. Sydney," She turned to address her daughter with a smile, "You're clothes are upstairs in your room…meet me outside on the East lawn in 10 minutes." She winked at Sydney with a smile and Sydney's eyebrows shot up in surprise and curiosity.

"Irina, what are you doing?" Jack eyed her outfit nervously and then seeing the look in her eye, his blood pressure began to rise.

"I'm feeling restless, Sweetheart. I need an adrenaline fix." She flashed him her mega-watt smile, "I promised Sydney I would show her how I jumped the cars in Spain; today's the day."

"_Yes!_" Sydney squealed launching herself at Irina, wrapping her arms around her as she bounced and kissed her mother several times, "Thank you thank you thank you!"

"Go get changed." Irina raised her eyebrows at Sydney smiling and her daughter tore off up the stairs with wild abandon needing an adrenaline fix herself after retiring from the CIA.

"She's going to jump cars with the motorcycle again?" Steven asked excitedly looking around and then at his father. He'd seen the footage on the news and had delightedly told everyone in his class he '_knew her_.'

"You can't be serious?" Jack couldn't believe what he was hearing nor could anyone else.

"Of course, I'm serious." Irina narrowed her eyebrows with a smile, kissing him on the cheek winking at the group as she went by towards the door.

"Irina!" Jack boomed drawing her attention and forcing her to stop only momentarily before she continued on her way, knowing he was going to try to talk her out of it and so he and everyone else followed.

"Irina…" He caught up to her half way across the lawn and grabbed her arm softly, turning her. "You can't do this. Tomorrow you are going to be crowned the Tsar of Imperial Russia! You can't go doing something crazy like this now!"

"Why not?" Irina asked defiantly. "Jack," She took a calming breath seeing that everyone was listening and watching with rapt attention. "I need this, ok?" Her eyes sought his for understanding…she was under a lot of pressure, she needed a familiar release. "I promise I won't kill myself or get Sydney hurt. That is why I am teaching her on dirt bikes in soft grass and dirt rather then street bikes and pavement." She cocked her eyebrow at him, capturing his lips in a smoldering kiss before he could object further and finally laughed when they heard Weiss yell, _'Yeah!'_

"I can't stand by and watch you do this again. I almost had a heart attack the last time." Jack shook his head looking at her still stunned.

"Then don't stand. Pull up a folding chair and sit." She swatted his butt and climbed on her black motorcycle. "I already told Sergei, Viktor and Julian to set up chairs at the end of the run…that's what they are doing now." She smiled madly at his stunned face and slammed her foot down on the kick-start roaring the bike to life before tearing off in front of him.

"Holy crap! Holy shit! Fuck yeah!" Weiss went tearing through the gardens yelling with glee, "Oh sorry, Mr. President…First Lady, Ma'am...Prime Minister." He stumbled over their titles realizing when he ran into them what he was yelling.

"Mr. Weiss, what's going on that has you so excited?" Just as Katya asked the question with her daring eyes the distinct sound of a motorcycle dirt bike could be heard ripping through the air and in the blink of an eye a flash of black went tearing by them behind the trees.

"_That!_" He pointed happily at the culprit, "Irina's going to teach Syd how to jump the cars like she did in Spain!"

"She isn't…" Katya paled visibly in disbelief knowing her sister to well at times.

"Yes! She is! Right now, let's go!" He waved at them vigorously guiding them to the lawn chairs set up at the end of the massive East lawn were suddenly two small cars had been parked in a 'T' position, just as they had occurred naturally on that day in Spain. These cars were much smaller in size for safety sake and the purpose of teaching, they were exactly what Irina had wanted and so…her people delivered.

"Well, now you get to see our famous Rina up close and in action, Mr. President." Mikhail laughed nervously at his crazy friend.

Sydney came bounding out of the house moments later, decked out in the exact same satin outfit her mother was wearing only hers was a deep red. She was so excited she was literally jumping as she bound over to the group assembled.

Everyone who was staying at the house with them, including the servants and grounds keepers paused to watch this mother daughter death-defying lesson.

"Sydney," Vaughn grabbed her arm as she tore by him, the concern running rampant across his face, "You can't be serious about doing this! It's insane you're going to get hurt or worse…killed."

"Vaughn," She looked at him with a deviant smile and used her own '_teacher tone_,' "Do you honestly think my mother would let me doing anything that could get me hurt or killed now?"

"No." He shook his head, knowing she was right, "But accidents happen."

"Yes, they do. But she is an expert and I'm not a novice to this game." She pulled on her chest protector.

"I know you're not. I've seen you do hundreds of insane things over the years but that doesn't stop me from worrying about you every single time." He gave her a shy nervous smile.

Sydney's smile lit her entire face looking at the sweet adoring man she was going to marry; she kissed him soundly on the lips.

"I won't get hurt. I promise. Trust me. Trust Mom." She gave him one more peck before walking the last couple of steps to straddle her bike; matching red. Irina came flying up beside her and threw her back tire, fanning out and sliding to a stop with a smile. Her blood pumping now after a few trips around the grounds.

"You ready?" Irina asked smiling madly, revving her bike.

"Yep. Let's do this." Sydney returned the smile.

"They're insane. Both of them." Jack shook his head and slumped down on the folding chair as the others chuckled.

"They're adrenaline junkies." Weiss clarified and everyone kept laughing.

"I can't imagine how they are going to be content to live a life of fancy dresses and tea parties." Kendall shook his head along with Jack.

"Isn't that what they did before? Getting dressed up and attending parties. Only there was secret stealing going on behind the scenes?" Devlin smiled and everyone burst out laughing nodding along that he was right.

"Alright, Sweetheart. I'm going to do go through it once for you first so you can watch and then I will talk you through it on your headset when its your turn, ok?" Irina placed her hand over Sydney's on the handle-bars, "You sure you want to do this?"

"Yeah. I really want to." Sydney's voice took on a pleading tone, worried her mother would rethink this idea and not show her after all.

"Ok." Irina smiled widely and revved her bike, "Then let the fun begin." She gunned the bike and turned around to head back down the starting point way on the other side of the lawn.

**_*Where's Your Head At?*_**

"_Irina!_" Jack jumped up screaming her name over the roaring buzz of her engine. She flipped her hair over her shoulder and turned back to look at him with an enigmatic smile. "Your helmet!" He grabbed it off the hood of the front car and threw it over to her shaking his head and everyone burst into hysterics again at the hysterical couple.

"Thank you, Sweetheart!" Irina caught the flying black object and pulled it over her head quickly before tearing away.

"Buckle it!" He screamed after her when he saw she hadn't taken the time to do it and everyone laughed harder.

"Jack, Jack, Jack. Have you forgotten who you're married to?" Julian laughed, slapping him on the shoulder when he sat down beside him, finding an ease with him now but still not able to call him Dad yet. It would come with more time but for now, they were both comfortable with just 'Jack.' "You're lucky she even put it on. She normally doesn't wear one and the fact that she is for you now, speaks of how much she loves you." He smiled widely and there was a mixture of 'awes' and laughter.

"_She's going to do what?_" Talia screeched from behind them as Vaughn guided his grandmother to one of the chairs, her face ashen at hearing what Irina had planned on doing. "Oh Sweet Jesus." She crossed herself in prayer. "Her mother was outgoing and adventurous but Irina, she's thee extreme!"

"Yes, Mother, she is!" Mikhail laughed, grasping her soft hand in his, "But that's why we love her so and she makes life fun and interesting again!"

"Here she comes!" Marshall peered down green seeing the tiny ball of black moving towards them at great speed and gradually getting bigger as the sound increased with her nearness.

"Oh dear God." Kendall sucked in a breath when she was a few feet away, using her arms and heels, kicked the bike up and back onto its rear tire, "Ho-ly shit!" He gasped as did everyone else when she ramped off the little red car and flew over both cars at lightening speed and height, landing gracefully on her back tire in the grass before pushing forward and landing the front tire, the control much easier with this lighter bike.

"She's just fricking amazing! Hands down, she's the bomb!" Weiss laughed and clapped loudly whistling when Irina turned back towards them, everyone jumping to their feet clapping and cheering while Jack sighed in relief shaking his head.

"I couldn't do that." Laura Bush gasped in shock over the woman tearing towards them in black, the same woman that tomorrow would be crowned the Empress of Russia…and she'd just bore witness to her flying through the air over cars on a motorcycle with wild abandon.

"I don't think most people could, Honey. I know I couldn't." The President laughed softly, kissing his wife's cheek.

"Awesome." Weiss smiled at Irina when she slid to a stop just in front of them, whipping her helmet off and flinging her long mane over her shoulder with a smile.

"Thank you, Sweetheart," She glanced over to Sydney, "Your turn. Don't worry…piece of cake." She winked at her as Sydney kick started her bike and tore in a circle up the green to the starting point.

"I swear you're going to give me a heart-attack, woman!" Jack remained shaking his head as Irina laughed making him smile when she hit him with her playful seductive eyes.

"Ok, Mom I'm ready." Sydney could be heard coming through the Com in Irina's helmet and she pulled it out, putting it over her ear to talk her daughter through it.

"Alright, Sweetie…When I say 'when,' I want you to rev it up as far as you can go. When I tell you to pull up on your rear tire I want you to jerk the bike up with you…it will be easy with the bike's light weight. Keep your body centered over the bike, heels firmly on the pegs and arms slightly bent but remaining pulling back so the front tire is in the air." Irina brushed her hair behind her ear and everyone listened to her instructions using a mixture of her soothing mother and no-non-sense teacher tones. "While you're in the air clearing the cars I want you looking for the place you're coming down at…make certain your back tire hits that mark and grabs before you lean forward and relax your weight alright?"

"Ok." Sydney took a deep breath feeling her blood thundering through her body with excitement.

"Well now you get to see what your future daughter-in-law can do." Weiss smiled boldly at Mikhail and Amelie, who was wearing a look of intrigue, amazement and terror.

"Alright Sydney. Hit it!" Irina instructed holding her fingers over her ear piece as Sydney came flying towards them. "Up!" Irina yelled when she hit the mark and Sydney followed the direction immediately and was doing a wheelie for a few feet before launching off the front of the car, soaring through the air. "Knees and arms bent! Find that mark!" Irina commanded while Sydney was still in the air and everyone held their breath watching in slow motion as Sydney's back tire hit the ground and then the front. "Good job, Sweetheart!"

"I knew she could do it!" Irina smiled proudly watching Sydney circle and come back to them.

"Like mother like daughter." Devlin laughed, grasping Jack's shoulder, "You married a helluva woman, Jack. Best of luck to you there!" He laughed harder and Irina's eyes flitted to his with a dangerous playful gleam.

"That was awesome!" Sydney was yelling with bright eyes before she stopped the bike and took her helmet off. Tucking the protective gear under arm with a smile she shook out her own long locks riding her adrenaline wave. "Let's do it again!"

Irina threw her head back laughing, her daughter really was just like her with her severe addiction to adrenaline.

"Ok, one more time." Irina gave in smiling, kicking her bike starting it again she moved it closer a few feet to Jack and leaned over, pulling him towards her and crashing her lips to his. "Last one, today. I promise." She giggled, brushing her nose with his feeling very alive at the moment, "I love you."

Irina drove him crazy, but he loved her with every fiber of his being and it was this 'craziness' that was part of her electricity, part of her that he loved. She stuck her helmet back on and tore off with Sydney. The two of them jumped the cars one more time each before doing good on their promise and stopping for the day.

* * *

Irina once again disappeared after dinner and Jack searched the palace everywhere but couldn't find her. Finally giving up searching by himself, and getting worried about her, knowing how stressed she was, he made his way into the family room filled with people and laughter as they talked excitedly about tomorrow.

"Have any of you seen Irina?" Jack broke through the laughter and everyone turned their' attention to him.

"You lost her again?" Devlin asked with laughing eyes, "You have a hard time hanging on to her."

"So it seems." Jack shrugged, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I saw her about forty-five minutes ago." Viktor offered from the back of the room, "She was leaving with Dmitri. Said she was stepping out for a little while to '_clear her head and get some advice._" He shrugged his eyebrows and his shoulders having no idea what she was talking about, "I have no idea what that means but she said not to worry."

"Get some advice?" Jack repeated in question his own eyebrows narrowing thinking about where she could have gone and to 'whom' for this advice. "What does that mean? Who would she be going to for advice right now?"

"Irina's only every really sought advice from one person." Katya's eyes lit up and then saddened with realization, "Mama. She went to see her."

"What?" Jack looked at her still confused for a moment then it registered. "At St. Peter and Paul's?" He asked to clarify, intending to go find her, knowing that for her to go, she must really be upset.

"Yes." Katya nodded softly; and everyone's happy disposition suddenly left, thinking about Irina leaving in the night to visit her mother's tomb seeking advice from beyond.

"That's where the entire family is entombed, isn't it?" Marshall asked softly and everyone's eyes darted to his and he sunk down into the couch feeling as though he shouldn't have asked.

"Yes." Katya answered softly again, giving him a smile and a reprieve.

"I have a question. If the KGB…and they found Anastasia's body in a…how did they…never mind." He shook his head, "I shouldn't have asked."

"Are you asking how they found my mother's body in Ekaterinberg near where the rest of her family died? When she didn't until she was murdered by the KGB for Rina's refusal?" She spat out quietly and rapidly shaking her head, "The KGB dumped her body there…knowing the rest of the family was in that area somewhere and if her body was found near where the rest of the family was killed, they wouldn't suspect anything. Believe her to have perished with them. Irina was the one who hired the excavation teams to start looking in that area, not only for Mama…but for all of them. She found them and in order for them to be given the burial they deserved, and not shroud an already terrible tragedy with more darkness of inquisitions into another wrongful death and years of lies by the Soviet Government. She made it seem as though our mother had died when she was seventeen years old with the rest of her family, that they all died together so that they could all be buried together and finally have peace. It was something our mother always wanted, was always terribly saddened by. The thought of her family buried somewhere in an unmarked grave to be lost and forgotten. Rina fulfilled our mother's life long wish by finding them."

"Oh…I see." Marshall gulped.

"I'm going to find her. Be back in a while." Jack turned on his heel determined.

"He left quickly." Weiss nodded softly at Jack's retreating form.

"He's worried about Mom. She's obviously stressed out which isn't good for her on many levels." Sydney answered softly.

**_*Science and Religion*_**

When Jack walked into the enormous cathedral he saw his wife kneeling in the front of the enclosed tombs at the altar. Her bodyguards watching closely from the corners, sides and backs nodding at Jack with solemn eyes when they saw him walking quietly up the aisle. The closer he got, he could see her arms were folded on the metal barricade fence enclosure, her head buried face down in her arms, completely still.

"Irina," He called out to her softly before closing the final distance, not wanting to scare her by touching her if she hadn't heard his approach.

Her eyes had been closed, hidden under her arms and flew open when she heard Jack's voice, not realizing how much time must have passed. Slowly, she lifted her head to look at him as he stood beside her, then knelt to her level, looking at her with sad loving eyes when he saw her red eyes and tear stained cheeks.

"I couldn't find you. Katya told me…she thought you might be here." He spoke softly, and with respect for his surroundings. "She thought you might be talking to your mother." His eyes left hers briefly to scan the casket tombs before them, a horrible sadness washing over him taking away his breath with the reality of their deaths, seeing their tombs for the first time.

"Jack, this is my mother, Anastasia...'Anya" Irina nodded to the white tomb in front of her with a golden cross, "Mama," Her voice cracked, "This is, my Jack." She smiled through her tears, "I've wanted the two of you to meet for a long time; this is as good as we're going to get, I guess." She shrugged sadly as another round of tears rushed over her eyes.

Behind that thick layer of marble lay the remains of Irina's mother, her mother who was executed because she wouldn't leave America, leave he and Sydney. A woman who knew she was about to die and her parting words to her beloved daughter had been to follow her heart, telling her she understood why she didn't want to leave them and gave her blessing.

"She sounded incredible." He looked back at his wife with tears building in his own eyes, "I would have liked to have known her and I would thank her," He moved forward and dropped fully onto his knees beside Irina, brushing her hair over her ear and wiping her tears, "For giving me two miracles: you, " He smiled softly, "And time for a second chance for us."

Irina smiled and felt more tears coming, he was incredible.

"Talk to me, Irina. Tell me what you're thinking and we'll figure it out together." He ran his hand down the back of her head, smoothing her hair. "I know this is about tomorrow."

"It's not about tomorrow." She breathed out a big sigh, trying to collect herself, she rocked back on her heels and stood, moving to sit in the first pew. "I mean it is and it isn't."

"Ok," Jack followed her, waiting for her to go on as he sat beside her, wanting to crush her into his arms and take away whatever was making her so upset but knowing she needed some space.

"Jack, I don't know if I can do this. Be the Tsar of Russia." She finally voiced the fear that had been growing quietly.

"What do you mean? Irina..." He was surprised to hear what she was saying.

"I don't know if I can do it, Jack. To be responsible for millions of lives. The future of my country. I don't know that I am the right person for this." Her eyes remained locked on her mother's tomb.

"I think you have your answer." He said quietly and her head whipped to his. "Irina, you just said, _my country_ and your concerns are for the wellbeing of your people, realizing what an enormous responsibility this is and you're afraid you're going to make mistakes." He threaded his fingers over the back of her hand. "You admitted to me on Mother's Day, that when you were pregnant with Sydney, you had fears of failing. Of making mistakes before she was even born."

"And I did. God, Jack, look at the mistakes I made with her! I abandoned my child! I failed her in the worst way! How can I not be concerned that I will fail all of them, too?" Irina's eyes were intense through their red puffiness, her voice rising and falling with her emotions.

"You didn't abandon, Sydney."

"Yes, I did."

"_No..._ you didn't. I wish I had never used that word with you as it seems to have stuck. I know now that you were faced with the most difficult choice of your had to chose between saving our lives…Sydney's life, your daughter's life!" He stressed his point, turning her face towards him softly, "Or staying and risking it knowing they just murdered your mother for your refusal…you did the most unselfish, selfless act I could ever imagine. You gave up your child. Gave up knowing your child, so that she could live. That's not abandoning her, Irina, you loved her more then anything and you put her needs before your own no matter how much it hurt you. That is 'why' you are such an phenomenal mother." Jack searched her eyes, and wiped the new tears with his thumb, "You are worried for all the right reasons. That is a sign of a good ruler. Someone who cares this much about her people to take a step back and ask, '_am I the right person for this job?'_ It's not about the power for you or the title or the position. It's about the people, the country as a whole. You are exactly what they need. You are willing to put their best interests before your own. You have no ulterior motives but to love them and support them, guide them into a better life, the same way you are with our children. That is why the people want you, to be '_Mother Russia_."

Irina looked away, digesting all that he said.

"You've already been doing it for years, Irina. You've been Mother Russia for almost 14 years. You're going to be doing the same things you've always done." He moved her face back to his and kept his hand framing the side looking deeply into her brown pools, drowning with every beat of his heart. "And I am going to be there, right by your side. Whenever you need me; I'll be there to help in whatever way I can. I support you all the way, Irina. You know in your heart, you were born for this." He paused swallowing hard when she blinked slowly and new warm tears ran down her cheeks, "That is why you came here tonight, to this place, the resting place of all the Tsars that came before you. Your mother...you came here, to seek her advice; which you already know is inside you, because she's a part of you. You are her legacy and this is your destiny. I really believe that; and I know, you know it, too. Don't doubt yourself, Irina."

"And if I fail, Jack?" Her voice quivered with emotion even as she spoke resolutely.

"You won't fail. You can't fail at this. You haven't failed at this for the last nearly 14 years!" He smiled running his thumb over her cheekbone. "You've learned from the mistakes of the past, Irina, yours and others' and you're using the wisdom you gained from them, to push forward and succeed where others fail because they didn't learn from the past mistakes. They kept repeating them over and over. You won't fail."


	60. Chapter 60

_**AN: Music for this chapter (on repeat): Myth, Power, Beauty by, **__**Chevaliers de Sangreal by Hans Zimmer, PM's Love Theme by Craig Armstrong, Russian Waltz #2 by Dmitri Shostakovich**__****__**, Grand Russian Fantasia by Jules Levy, ******__Uf Dem Anger, No 7: Floret/Silva by Carl Orff from Carmina Burana, The Promise by Michael Nyman from The Piano Soundtrack, Fairy Dance by James Newton Howard from Peter Pan Soundtrack, Cuzco by E.S. Posthumus._

* * *

SIXTY

o

Jack, Julian, Sergei and Marcelo were at the bottom of the grand staircase in Alexander Palace on the following morning, dressed immaculately and looking dangerously handsome in their Imperial Military Regalia. Jack was wearing a white jacket, Sergei and Julian in red and Marcelo, in dark blue in accordance to Imperial Court customs.

Vaughn, Weiss and Marshall also in blue as 'honorary' Grand Dukes, at least, until tomorrow's ceremony where it would be made official when Irina, as the Tsar, knighted them with the title at the gala the following evening at the Winter Palace, being the Godfathers of the Tsarevicha Lena.

Everyone else staying at the palace had left already to find their seats along the processional route.

"Oh, wow." Marshall gasped when he looked up to see Sydney, carrying Lena, Sophia and Katya all descending the Grand Staircase in their Coronation gowns made especially for the event in traditional Russian style reminiscent of the Court dresses worn at the last Coronation ceremony almost 100 years before during Nicholas II's crowning.

All of the dresses were the same design with each of them in a different color. Sydney's dress was a vibrant red, Katya's a navy blue, Sophia's a baby blue and Lena's white with gold as Irina's would be. The crushed velvet fabric of their trains made it look like they were floating as they moved down the steps with big beautiful smiles, feeling every bit the part of 'princess' in these gowns. The intricate inlayed gold pattern on each dress sewn by hand with 18 karate gold thread, making them fairly heavy.

"You look…" Vaughn couldn't get the words out as his fiancée glided towards him looking radiant in red. "Stunning. Gorgeous. Take your pick, you're all of the above." He leaned in and kissed her softly on the cheek in a gentlemanly fashion.

Weiss's eyes were boggled out of is head looking at Sophia and for quite a few moments didn't say anything but stare.

"Is she almost ready?" Jack asked nervously, feeling his palms already sweating beneath his white gloves in anticipation of seeing Irina.

"We don't know, we haven't seen her yet this morning." Katya smiled nervously, looking up to the balcony for her sister as well.

_***Myth, Power, Beauty***_

"Here she comes." Sydney smiled excitedly seeing the door to the room open upstairs and her mother's ladies-in-waiting, maids of honor for the day, come out, Irina followed moments later and though they couldn't see her fully yet, knew she looked spectacular.

When she rounded the corner and began her descent, flanked on each side by two attendants and two in the back managing her massive trains, they gasped in awe. Tears immediately flooding to Katya and Sydney's eyes as they met Irina's.

Her gown was simpler in design in accordance with tradition as she would receive numerous regalia as part of the ceremony. The satiny white fabric met the gold thread in a beautiful but humbled design. An enormous golden crushed velvet robe flowed behind her, trimmed with fur that looked like it came straight out of a fairy-tale. Her hair had been curled and was pulled half back and up on the sides in order to accommodate the large crown that would soon be adorning her head. When she reached the bottom of the steps she flashed her mega-watt smile and Jack had to remember to breathe.

"You look…simply…spectacular." He smiled and extended his arm to her, walking her to the front door and down the steps to the waiting carriage. She would be riding in the first open carriage alone. Jack behind her with the Imperial Life-Guards cavalry regiment, sworn protectors of the Tsarina; Sydney and Vaughn after them, Julian with Lena, Katya and Marcelo, Sergei and Sophia, and finally Weiss and Marshall who would be riding with several other 'honorary' knights including Dmitri and Alexei.

"Are you ready?" Jack asked smiling, looking up at his beautiful wife hearing the crowd outside the gates already cheering enthusiastically in anticipation.

Irina smiled confidently, shaking her head and kissed Jack's cheek when he had finished helping her along with her maids get her and her massive trains into the carriage.

"Yes, I'm ready." She smiled, inhaling deeply watching as he mounted his white steed, looking every bit 'Prince Charming.'

The miles-long passage formed by the troops led to the centuries-old walls of the St. Isaac's. Deployed inside were the battalions of the Life Guards Semyonovsky and Preobrazhenskiy regiments, the first regiments of the regular Russian Army created by Peter the Great. Commanding the troops was Grand Duke Vladimir Alexandrovich, Nicholas II's uncle.

Considerable sums were allotted for repairing and decorating palaces, imperial theaters and places for outdoor fetes and spectacles in St. Petersburg for the Coronation and birthday Jubilee. Banners and standards, the Purples and the Regalia, as well as liveries for top officials and vestments for dignitaries, garments for heralds and other vestments were to be specially made for the occasion. The most prominent artists and decorators were engaged in embellishing the palaces and streets of St. Petersburg. Special coins and medals were minted to commemorate the Sacred Coronation.

Nine shots from the guns of the Tainitskaya Tower rang out in Moscow, and the bells of the Assumption Cathedral pealed in time with St. Petersburg. Not only the pavements, but the ledges and roofs of the houses were swarming with people, every pair of eyes fixed on the Triumphal Gates.

The gates opened and horse drawn carriages moved forward, with Irina holding her breath. Calvary and foot soldiers lined the processional route and Her Imperial Majesty's Own Escort, the Horse-Guards, the Life-Guards Uhlan, Dragoon, Cuirassier, Hussar and Cossack squadrons and regiments, the grenadiers as well as riflemen, sappers and military schools' cadets, made up an impressive, picturesque throng, with horses, guns and all sorts of arms, all of them subject to strict regulations and discipline. Gathered under their regimental standards, these troops represented the pride and glory of the Russian Army.

Suspense had crept over the crowd as they waited expectantly for days for the Imperial procession to appear.

At last the gun salute rang out from St. Peter and St. Paul's Cathedral to herald the departure of the Tsarina and Imperial family from the Alexander Palace. The sound of the guns had hardly receded before the bells of all the churches of St. Petersburg joined in the joyous cacophony. The people, as one, uncovered their heads and devoutly crossed themselves. Tears sparkled in the eyes of many at the new beginning for Russia and hopeful for her future.

From all the churches that the Tsarina's procession passed on their journey to the St. Isaac's where the ceremony took place, the priests carrying crosses, icons and gonfalons in their hands, came out to give the Tsar their blessing for a just and long-lasting reign.

The stunning splendor of the Imperial procession unfolded gradually, new groups of participants, one after another, joining this magnificent train. Preceding the Imperial procession rode the cavalcade of fourteen gendarme officers.

Following them were the four Cossack squadrons of Her Imperial Majesty's Own Escort, dressed in red Circassian coats.

Next came Her Imperial Majesty's Life-Guards Cossacks with Jack and, after them, horsemen mounted on beautiful half-tamed steppe and mountain steeds. The riders were valiant, dashing Central Asiatic and Caucasian Dzhigits, wearing oriental robes and Circassian coats embroidered in gold and silver. They were followed by the representatives of all Cossack troops.

In the rear of that part of the procession were the Horse-Guards squadron of the Life-Guards Cavalry regiment, the horsemen wearing helmets and cuirasses, with broadswords gleaming in their hands. And then, Her Majesty the Tsar appeared.

As befitting the occasion, she rode in the most splendid part of the procession were the fourteen coaches and phaetons covered with gold leaf and velvet, the train drawn by six horse harnessed in tandem. Some of the coaches, done in the style of Louis XV, dated back to the reign of Empress Catherine II and Emperor Paul I. Each of the horses, beautiful and graceful, with golden trappings, was led by an equerry.

Irina waved elegantly at the people along the roads and streets, overwhelmed by their outpouring of love and support. She spotted many faces as they passed along the processional route from unexpected people.

The man in Moscow who gave her bagels for free and traveled north to smile at her, the little girl and her grandmother standing next to a woman holding the 'new baby brother,' the nurse who had taken care of Lena, and Nicholas, the young man who had found her at the University before she had been outed waved enthusiastically with his parents who had come from Siberia. She spotted the faces of her American neighbors, and Dr. Ryan Peterson, Ann and their children.

One face that stuck out even though time had aged it, steeling Irina's breath away and it belonged to none other then Ms. Adams. The young woman she had left Sydney with on the night of her Extraction. She briefly wondered if Sydney saw her, too. Friends from all over the world came to see this great moment.

As they neared the cathedral, she spotted the world leaders and royal families; among them found President Bush, Laura, the Putins, Mikhail and Bella, and his entire family, Carrie, Dixon, and his children, Kendall, and Devlin.

_***Chevaliers de Sangreal* **_

When the procession reached the cathedral Jack dismounted and helped Irina out of her carriage after having passed millions of people.

On all belfries of the city the bell-ringers held their bell-pulls awaiting the pre-arranged signal. Noiselessly, officials and their assistants carried the Imperial Regalia, the Chain of the Orders of St. Andrew for His Majesty the Tsar and Grand Duke, the Sword of State, the Banner of State, the State Seal, the Purple for Her Majesty the Tsarina, the Orb, the Sceptor, the Small Imperial Crowns for the Grand Duchess', and the Great Imperial Crown for the Tsarina, all arranged in a strict order of succession towards the St. Isaacs Cathedral. All of them having been re-set and sized by Cartier especially for the new Imperial family.

The cathedral was already packed with people and their group of friends found their saved seats immediately as the Imperial family started making their way up the aisle. Everyone gasping at Irina's beauty as she passed on Jack's arm making her way up to the front.

Jack released her arm and stepped off to the side with the others as Irina alone faced the Orthodox Priests.

The last portraits of Nicholas II and Alexandra, and their children were all placed on golden stands at the front of the church, the last one of Anastasia that Irina had found became her focal point as she waited for the ceremony to begin, trying to calm her nerves.

The new Imperial Choir and Symphony filled the massive expanse with music as the ceremony commenced; the priests first recognizing the last Imperial family, slain in Siberia, and acknowledging the transition, back to the monarchy and the tone was very somber.

As the ceremony continued, everyone's thoughts were flying madly around. Irina stood before everyone the entire half hour listening intently and very seriously taking the oaths she was giving to God and country. She was then made to lift her arms and was stripped of her golden robe and then dress, leaving her a plain white slip, essentially exposed to everyone in a symbolic gesture of purifying her before receiving Communion. She was given Communion from a cup in which only the highest priests were allowed to drink and knelt on their altar as she was blessed with Holy Oils.

Irina never looked more innocent in her life, was the general thought going around seeing her in nothing but a white slip kneeling at the altar of God receiving communion.

When that part of the ceremony was over, her maids dressed her once more in the beautiful white gown with the Order of St. Andrew.

A pillow covered in crushed red velvet with gold trim was set a few feet before Irina on the ground and the Imperial Regalia was brought out, each piece resting on its own pillow. She took a deep breath as the priest asked her to kneel. With guiding arms, she did as instructed and placed her hand on the Bible and recited her oath. She removed the Order of St. Andrew and handed it to the Metropolitan of St. Petersburg.

As she kneeled the purple robe was placed around her shoulders and the diamond chain of the Order of St. Andrew followed. Irina bowed her head and two prayers were said over her head, making the sign of the cross. She looked up and ordered the Imperial Crown be given to her, as was Russian custom. From the hands of the Metropolitan she accepted the crown and placed it on her own head.

She ordered that the other regalia be given to her and with the Scepter in her right hand and the Orb in the left, she took her seat on the Imperial Throne.

When her eyes meet her people they contained unshed tears and she looked over to see Sydney, Katya and Sophia sobbing with happy tears and Jack and Julian's eyes burning with unshed tears as they look at her proudly.

After a few minutes she rose to her feet and handed her regalia to her attendant, summoning Jack before her. He kneeled on the red pillow before her. Irina took off her crown and touched it to his forehead. She then placed the Order of St. Andrew around his neck with the baby blue sash and Imperial symbol of the Romanovs. She placed the rest of the regalia on him and summoned him to stand.

Irina's eyes were beaming as she smiled at him and excused him and Sydney stepped forward, kneeling before her mother and receiving her regalia the same way, with Irina touching her crown to her forehead. She placed Sydney's crown on her head and summoned her to stand, smiling brilliantly at her daughter who's face is washed with tears of happiness.

One after another the members of her Imperial family step forward and kneel and Irina anointed them with her crown and their regalia.

Lena was the last to receive her regalia and when Jack stepped forward and kneeled with her, everyone's hearts beamed with love seeing the little baby looking up at her mother with big brown eyes as she is blessed and received her own tiny blue sash as the Order of St. Andrew and specially made crown by Cartier that fits her head perfectly and weighing almost nothing to keep from hurting her little head.

_***PM's Love Theme***_

When she is finished, the Orb and Scepter were placed back in Irina's hands.

"I can't believe this is happening." Kendall whispered to Dixon with eyes wide as he looked at Irina in her full regalia, crown and robes looking every bit the Queen you only see in the movies.

Everyone suddenly broke into cheering as Jack joined Irina having passed Lena back to Julian, standing by her side as they exited the cathedral, golden confetti falling from the sky as every single Russian began singing along with the anthem of their new Tsar. The world celebrating together as the ceremony was the mostly highly broadcast event to ever be shown.

"Did that really just happen?" Irina turned her head to Jack with a soft smile and blank expression once they were settled in a new carriage, now adorned with the Imperial Crown and Insignia being the _Official Ruler._

Jack laughed, clasping her forearm as her hands still held her regalia, the couch making the procession to Peterhof for the reception.

"Yes, My Empress, My Tsarina, My Love." He smiled, brightly with immense love. "I'm so proud of you. Your mother…your grandfather, must be so proud of you." He looked into her beautiful sparkling eyes. "You look amazing." He smiled, waving at the crowds. "Isn't that heavy?" He smirked looking at her crown loaded with diamonds and rubies.

"Yes, it is." Irina laughed, maintaining her perfect posture to support the weight. "Now I know why my grandfather didn't like this crown; it is very heavy. I think I will save this one for extremely, important circumstances." She smiled her brilliant smile at him and everyone in the crowds along the road. "I have another one, a much lighter one, waiting for me at Peterhof. Sydney and Lena looked so beautiful and you and Julian, quite handsome."

Jack looked at her in amazement; here was Irina, sitting in her Imperial carriage in a gorgeous gown and robe, massive crown a top her head and regalia covering her body, the official Tsar of the largest country in the world acting completely calm and normal and Jack had to laugh. For as much as their' life was going to change, some things were always going to stay the same…and his wife and her beautiful personality were one of them. He knew she could do this.

* * *

The reception began outdoors in Peterhof's luxurious gardens with thousands of people admitted alongside the world's leaders and royalty, Irina wanted to have her people amongst them celebrating and invited everyone from the gypsies to the Siberian tribes.

Shortly after arriving, she had sought some solace in her bedroom upstairs for a short reprieve and rest period, still careful of her diabetes and took an hour to play with Lena who was clearly missing her Mama's attention. She had changed out of her Coronation gown that would be immediately sent to the Hermitage Museum to be put on display as part of the Coronation exhibit the museum's curator was so excited to present.

Her heavy Imperial Crown weighing nine pounds was put back in High Security as well as her Orb and Scepter and she now wore a simple but gorgeous white dress, her baby blue satin sash of the Order of St. Andrew, the Romanov Imperial Eagle, her purple robe and the Russian crown that Queen Elizabeth had given back to Russia now, as it was part their' royal jewels.

The crown along with many other pieces of royal jewelry had been smuggled out of Russia when Imperial Russia fell in 1917. Now that the Imperial Family was back, Irina had enlisted the help of numerous other royals to find and return her family's jewels of the Romanov Dynasty going all the way back to the 1600s.

Jack rapped softly at the door and her maids smiled at her as she scooped the baby up off the bed, Lena completely fascinated with the fur trim on her Mama's robe.

"Come in." Irina called to him in Russian and smiled widely when she saw her husband looking terribly handsome in his royal uniform. "Did I tell you, how extremely handsome you look in that uniform?" She smiled coyly as he came to stand in front of her with a devilish smile.

"I believe you did." His smile grew as he took hold of Lena's hand and kissed it.

"Did I tell you how 'sexy' you are in that uniform?" She whispered in her seductive voice her bedroom eyes flashing brilliantly and Jack felt the familiar surge.

"I don't believe so, Empress." He flashed her his own mega watt smile. "Perhaps, you can tell me again…later." He waggled his eyebrows and she laughed. "Are you ready?"

"You've asked me that a lot lately." She arched her eyebrow laughing as she passed Lena to him and then took hold of his free arm. Navigating the exterior grand staircase would be far too dangerous with a baby in one arm wearing the enormous gown and robes she had on. "I suppose I'm as ready as I'll ever be."

_***Grand Russian Fantasia***_

Irina appeared at the top of Peterhof's grand staircase while the party and reception raged on outdoors in the palaces beautiful gardens and everyone stopped to stare at the music cue announcing her arrival. She made her way down the steps on Jack's arm, Lena in the crook of his other and smiling madly, enchanting everyone she passed, already the elegant Empress.

"Your Mom looks fantastic." Vaughn smiled, linking his fingers with Sydney's as they watched her parents join the party. "I think women in your Imperial Family put all these other royals to shame with your astounding beauty." He whispered in her ear, tickling her with his breath. "Did I tell you how ravishing you look in that dress? Wearing that crown, Your Highness? Who knew a crown would be so sexy." He laughed and Sydney broke into giggles when he kissed her ear, suggestively.

The front garden had been converted elegantly into a massive dance floor where hundreds of beautiful couples were dancing gracefully around the outdoor ballroom, tables set up around the perimeters for the banquet.

"Vaughn! Stop it!" She whispered sternly trying not to giggle when she felt his tongue graze her ear, "I can't cause a scandal on my first day as a royal!"

"Let 'em talk. You're hot and they're not. Let them deal with that. They just can't handle the 'new kids on the block." He laughed softly into her ear looking at some rather 'old' looking royals that from the sounds of it, were centuries beyond any real royal connection having been removed so many times with marriage and birth that few true royal families really existed and now Irina and her family were among that select few, being direct descendents.

_***Russian Waltz***_

When the dance finished, Jack handed Lena to Weiss and took Irina's hand for their first dance to the Russian Waltz, all eyes on them as they moved gracefully around the room.

"I always loved dancing with you." Irina smiled, whispering knowing they were being heavily scrutinized and not wanting to share her personal thoughts with her public.

"I've always loved the way you move." Jack said suggestively causing Irina to laugh as he twirled her and the other couples soon joined in and just as swiftly as he had her in his arms, the partners changed and he was dancing with Katya now, Irina in Vladimir's arms.

His eyes kept heavily focused on Irina and finally he turned his head to look at Katya when she laughed.

"I know I'm not the Derevko you want to be dancing with but could you at least try to look at me at least once." Her deviant eyes danced with laughter when Jack smiled and began to blush.

"I'm sorry, that was rude of me. I just-"

"Can't help yourself where Irina is concerned, I know." She patted his arm smiling and laughing all at once when their eyes both sought out her sister, laughing at something Vladimir was saying to her.

"Well yes, that's true and exactly what I was going to say." Jack smiled brightly and pushed her around the dance floor, spinning her once more. "She's so beautiful. I just can't stand to be away from her. Nothing against you."

Katya threw her head back in laughter.

"Oh Jack, I know you have nothing against me. She feels the same way about you and I think I can maneuver us into a position that in three partners, you'll be back in each other's arms. What do you say?"

"I'd say, I love you!" He replied immediately and Katya's eyebrows rose and then burst into laughter seeing his expression. "You know what I meant-" He mumbled trying not to laugh.

"Yes I know. Let's do this." She turned and edged them across the room and ahead of another couple.

She was right, in three partners, and one song later, Irina was back in his arms. The night was going fantastically well and everyone was having a marvelous time, the best party any of them had been to in years and even more fun as the 'classes' were mixed. Royals with gypsies, dignitaries with Siberian farmers… all drinking and laughing over their shared joy.

**_*Uf Dem Anger, No 7: Floret/Silva*_**

The dance floor was alive with gorgeous couples in traditional Russian dancing and Irina couldn't stop smiling looking around at all the happy faces on her family and her people and the other world leaders.

"Your Highness, everyone is having a blast." Vaughn smiled when Irina became his partner, addressing her formally for the first time. "This is the most fun I've had in years. Sydney, too."

"I'm so happy everyone is enjoying themselves." Irina smiled brightly looking around. "The next time you and I dance, will be at your wedding." She flashed him her famous smile with dancing eyes.

"Yes, I suppose it will be." Vaughn smiled shyly.

"You're a very good dancer, Michael. My daughter is a lucky woman." She leaned up and kissed his cheeks before switching partners in the wild dance.

When the song ended, and night had fallen, a spot-light appeared on the grand piano next to the symphony and Irina made her way towards it smiling at everyone as she went.

"What is she doing?" Sydney leaned over and whispered to her father, Lena asleep on his shoulder, all partied out.

"I have no idea. Your mother is full of surprises, I am guessing this is one of them." He smiled brightly turning back to watch Irina who was whispering to the symphony director. She took a seat at the piano, guided there by his arm and her maids straightened out her massive train.

"I was asked earlier tonight by Sasha if I wouldn't play something for everyone." She smiled back to the older man who was directing the symphony. "I haven't prepared anything so I am just going to play and see what comes out." She smiled and everyone laughed intrigued by this new Tsar having no idea she could play the piano. "I would like to dedicate this to my wonderful family." She looked over and found their eyes, looking at all of them, "And to all the people of Russia, you have my greatest respect. In saying that, I'd like to call this, '_My Promise_' to all of you." She took a deep breath and let her fingers rest on the ivory as the crowd of thousands hushed to silence, her image be projected on massive screens on the far ends of the gardens for those in the back who couldn't see. Without a second thought, she just began to play what was in her heart.

_***The Promise***_

Irina hit the ground running and her fingers were rapidly flying over the keys at a feverish pace from the very first notes and Sasha and the symphony were paying close attention to the music she was writing as she played looking for an entry point to join her.

Weiss looked over at Kendall smiling seeing the man's mouth hanging open in awe as he watched Irina playing, creating the song out of thin air.

"I told you she played a mean piano." Weiss whispered laughing, "I'm convinced there isn't anything this women can't do and do it well."

"Now I know why Jack and Sydney were worried about her hand and losing her ability to play." Kendall spoke softly in realization. She was an amazing pianist, something else of her genius. Her hands were literally flying over the keys barely touching them and yet making the most profound sounds. "Now I know, why she's so deadly with a knife."

"That's what I said!" Weiss's eyebrows shot up, trying not to laugh as they whispered and were suddenly shushed by Sophia.

The massive group assembled stood humbly in awe as they watched her and Sydney's eyes welled with tears of happiness. Katya was having the same reaction and pulled her niece to her, kissing her temple and holding onto her as they watched Irina sitting in the spotlight, looking like an angel playing from her heart and for them.

When she was finished she stood to a thundering round of applause that lasted minutes and she graciously bowed slightly in her appreciation of their kindness. She sought Jack out immediately.

"That was beautiful. It just came out of your pretty little head?" He looked at her with obvious amusement and pride as he kissed her cheeks, transferring Lena onto her shoulder.

"Yes, I just played what I felt." She smiled and shrugged. She didn't have time to elaborate when the first whistle and then loud boom of the fireworks started overhead, illuminating an all ready gorgeous palace.

* * *

_***Fairy Dance***_

Jack looked over at his wife, looking so regal in her crown and beautiful gown, breathtaking as the brilliant colors of the fireworks display reflected off her dark eyes. Her face nuzzling their baby who had awaken the loud booms of explosions, Irina obviously talking to her with her mouth moving and they both looked so happy, so content.

He turned to look at Sydney, wrapped in Vaughn's arms, big smile on her face as she excitedly pointed out her favorites to Prince William of Great Britian, Crown Princess Victoria of Sweden and her mother Queen Silvia and King Karl Gustaf, and King Juan Carlos I. of Spain.

Sophia and Weiss, Duke and Duchess of Lugo of Spain, Prince Harry of Great Britian along with Prince Karl Philip of Sweden were laughing and when followed their gaze saw that Sergei was pouring the young Madeleine, Princess of Sweden, another glass of champagne, obviously smitten with the young beauty.

Katya and Marcelo were enjoying themselves, just being able to enjoy time together with their busy schedules; something that was soon to be over now that he had accepted the Chief of Staff position in the St. Petersburg University Hospital.

Irina had been doing the same thing, looking around to her family and friends and realizing how truly blessed she was to have them all back in her life again, and how far they'd all come in just one years time.

A year ago she thought she'd lost everything and now she had everything. She had never seen Sydney happier, the last vestiges of their ordeal in Kashmir slowly fading into the background with time, both of them healing together and now looking forward to her wedding. Julian, she smiled thinking about her son, he was finally acting his age she laughed softly seeing him trying to 'woo' the Princess of Monaco and from the looks of it, succeeding. Lena had completely healed from all of her injuries and only a faint scar remained over her chest and abdomen and she had never seen a happier baby. Katya was overjoyed at having Marcelo moving to St. Petersburg and all of them living near each other, as one big family.

_***Cuzco***_

And_ Jack._ Irina looked over and found him staring at her intently his lips turning into a smile when their eyes caught and he gently pushed through the crowd of people towards her as the night sky erupted in brilliant colors.

His lips descended on her to capture them in a sweet kiss, framing her face with his hands.

"Are your dreams coming true?" He smiled at her softly, his fingers tracing her cheek as they only had eyes for each other.

"Yes, I believe so." She smiled, looking intently at him, moving into his touch. "I have my daughter back. I am married to the man I love. I have a new baby girl who gave us all a second chance. I have a son. I found my sister and one of my best friends."

"What else were you dreaming of that you have now?" He leaned in closer, moving together in their' own rhythm. "What did you really really want, that you've found now?"

Irina was quiet for a moment, looking into his eyes, there were so many things she wanted and obtained could be summarized with one simple word, "Absolution."

"Absolution?" Jack repeated searching her eyes for all that word meant to her.

"Yes, from my family for all the hurt that I caused whether intentionally or inadvertently…from God, for losing my soul and committing terrible acts before I found it again." She paused and he saw the hesitation knowing there was more.

"And." He prompted her, softly, rubbing his nose against her cheek as Lena grabbed onto both of their faces, with one little hand on each of their cheeks. "Aren't you forgetting perhaps, the most important person who needed forgiveness." He whispered softly, remembering his talk with Sydney. "Needed to forgive themselves."

"Me." She whispered softly against his lips, tears prickling her eyes.

Jack closed the distance, hearing her admit what he knew was difficult and captured her lips and felt her warm tears finally fall.

"And now that those dreams been fulfilled, what do you want now?" He cupped her face with both his hands, their faces millimeters apart as their lips touched lightly between every breath every word.

Irina felt her heart racing, their light touches igniting every fiber of her being as the explosions went on around them and within them.

"Forever and Always."

* * *

**~And just the beginning...**

*The **Sequel** is "**_Forever & Always_**" and will follow immediately! It's already posted! - Wild - For those I reading, who I haven't heard from before, I would LOVE to hear your thoughts on the story :)

(The sequel continues on into the future for the new Imperial Family, as well as going back in time in an unusual and fun way to learn about what Irina, Jack and Sydney were doing during those 'missing 20 years' apart.)

_**ALSO:**__For those wishing to 'SEE' the Magazine Covers and photos associated with this story and its sequel, you can find them all as posted on this tumblr page: **alias absolution forever and always. tumblr. com**/__ made especially for this story! Enjoy! **Password: absofa**_


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